#im capable of understanding that hes just a human person like me that makes mistakes

[altades]

Vashwood rant

I can't sleep so why not analyze vashwood in the middle of the night

Now, this analysis is mostly of the manga, with maybe small takes from 98 and tristamp

To start let's look at the boys from their respective beginnings

Vash is so cruelly mischaracterized as a child, and it might be a little bit of trismaps fault, even though i do love it, or maybe people are just putting characters into boxes without really thinking about it but Vash is so not soft-shy-nice little baby brother. The whole thing with him being younger is so insane to me, i get why if Nai was born like 10 minutes earlier he would make it his whole personality (very sibling thing to do) but it's just so stupid. No, they have 0 age difference and it doesn't affect their dynamic cuz the are literally twins for the love of god. And, really, when you look at the manga as kids Nai was the emotional one! And he still is!

Nai is plagued by fear and anger and resentment and those emotions are what drive his every decision. Vash, on the other hand, is much more in control of his feelings and doesn't show them as much. That is to say that pre-tesla nai is the one worried about their relationship with humans, about their future, he's the one crying after talking to Conrad (what a sweet child he was) while Vash seemes much less scared.

And when they find out about Tesla Nai is the one who faints - he’s the more reactive one, the emotional one. And that small difference is what sets their paths so differently. Because Vash actually gets a chance to talk to Rem and figure things out.And that talk is so very important because it makes Rem, who already was everything to Vash, even more important. 

Now, I want us all to think about how terrified Vash was after seeing Tesla cuz he probably thought his own mother was going to dissect him and his brother. But then she saves him when he tries to end his own life, proving that no she’s not gonna kill him, because she, as every human, has the capability to learn from her mistakes and make better choices. (too bad Nai didn’t get that lesson lol)

And then we get to the big bad things. (it’s genocide) But the important part from that whole ordeal is Rem’s sacrifice. Because, listen, I love stories where humanity is shown to be capable of change and forgiveness is a virtue and love and pussy and all that but oh man can it be so so unrealistic and a little bit insane to watch (su im looking at u (i love su but oh boy that is not how the world works unfortunately)) but Trimax manages to make it work so well. I believe that’s cuz Vash is a very kind and loving man but is also completely out of his mind and has horrendous mommy issues. At least half the reason he doesn’t kill people is because Rem has died to save them, and killing them would make it all be for nothing. If he kills these people or if he lets them die would that mean that Rem died for nothing? Did she sacrifice her life to save these people only for her own son to end their lives? AND you know I’m right cuz he literally says it in the manga but also BECAUSE HE DOES THE SAME FOR WOLFWOOD (also he did kill Nai when he had the chance but we don’t have time to unpack that)

All of that is A LOT and very complicated (i love Vash he’s so well written he’s my perfect little meow meow) now let's talk about Wolfwoooooooooood /twirls hair/

WW is much easier to understand and analyze cuz he is, just a guy,, WW is just a normal person who gets insanely unlucky and gets in THE WORST possible situations (If he ever played DND he would roll straight 1s). That is to say that his story is sort of a way to show how much life in the badlands sucks, but also that there are good things even in the worst places (the orphanage) And WW reacts to situations in the most rational way possible way - he kills to survive. he doesn’t want to but he doesn’t get a say in it. If he could chose he would just live with his family and friend and do whatever. And that, him being so normal in such a violent and bloody world is what makes him suffer all the time. His inner moral compass is screaming at him what a terrible person he is and he promptly ignores it.

That is until that moral compass manifests itself in the form of a tall, blond and handsome stranger that he’s supposed to lead to his death. The stranger who turns out to be the most compassionate and kind man WW’s has ever seen. Who he’s supposed to kill. It’s like finding an oasis in the desert and being forced to burn it to the ground. And WW doesn’t want to do that, and he refuses to believe that the oasis is not a mirage so he tries to get Vash to kill someone, even if it’s WW himself. (It doesn’t work.)

As we all know WW changes his mind because of Vash’s influence. And he dies for it. Because even though Vash’s beliefs are born of human virtues, no man is made to walk his path, for he is not human and any mortal who tries to follow an angel to the skies is doomed to crash. WHAT YOU DON’T EXPECT IS THAT THAT MAN WILL BRING THE ANGEL DOWN WITH HIM

There is this line I wrote for an art i’m planning to make and if you’ve read this far you deserve a lil spoiler - “have you found absolution in bringing an angel to his knees?” and it captures perfectly what i'm thinking. And also Vash spends so much time trying to be closer to people but I think him killing Legato might’ve been the most human thing he’s ever done. Cuz it’s is so beautiful in the way he does it for the memory of the person he loved and yet so ugly in it’s cruelty.

I’ve said this before but most of the time when there is a human/ some immortal powerful creature relationship I don’t think the human is that special but WW HE SO IS. Maybe it’s the way that he’s just as deep in the nuclear bombs with personality business as Vash is, being one of said nuclear bombs, but still remains a normal person with relatively good morals that he can anchor Vash to a sort of normality that he doesn’t get often. Like what other guy would get hunted by all sorts of freaks with you, get in trouble all the time, get shot and etc and etc and then go for a drink with you like it’s a normal wednesday? Wolfwood. Or maybe it's that WW learns of every worst part of Vash, he sees him be on the brink of losing himself, he knows Vash has actually caused the deaths of hundreds of thousands of people and ALMOST did it again after Julai, and still stays with him? He sees Vash become something that is not human at all and still stay? Idk MAYBE IT’S ALL OF THAT but WW is just so important and so down bad but we all know that already so i’m not gonna add to that

Anyways, I got this all out of my system gn

[pixiecaps]

no bc im not usually involved w stuff like this and believe everyone should be held accountable for their actions no matter what. but seeing the way quackity has been seen as non human, any emotion or misstep he has being seen as manipulative or fake is like crazy. i don’t understand how people don’t see like wait, your actually just being racist you are not capable of seeing him as a person, why? it feels like he really could’ve handled this perfectly and there still would be this large crowd regarding him as a heartless fraud??

truly. i have closely observed this situation and listened to both sides and theres a lot of different opinions that can co exist and theres a lot of complexity to them.

one particular thing that has bothered me and made me uncomfortable is the projection of quackity as this scheming conniving figure. its gross. him having to explain that hes had previous experiences like this where he keeps any sort of bad situation with another creator private and that in turn has made him perceived as more manipulative is so sad. and this isnt surprising obviously since this is something ive witnessed. but overall i think with the internet nowadays theres a large mindset that everything needs to be public information and shared with the audience while they preach to solve things in the dms. people only care for a show and to watch creators destroy themselves. thats what twitter is and what a lot of people actively strive to do on that platform. specifically in regards to leak communities.

everyone should be aware enough that theyre allowed to criticize quackity and the decisions he’s made that people may not agree with. he acknowledges that himself. but to paint him as anything other then human and someone who has deeply fucked up reaches that level where it is racism. i dont think many people quite realize micro aggressions when they see them. so theres that. and then theres obviously the extremes of the situation when it came to the doxxing and death threats. people actively celebrating and saying it surely is an okay thing to spread because well he fucked up right? hypocrisy. this goes the same way for any admin or worker involved the situation that has been sent and told the same.

this entire situation has proved to me that nobody knows how to properly handle anything or how to properly react to anything and choosing instead to immediately jump to those extremes mentioned in the name of activism and moral superiority.

anyways support the admins. listen to their stories. criticize media you consume in a constructive manner. call out xenophobia and racism when you see it. and treat people like the humans they are. they will all make mistakes each side has made a mistake. yes this also applies to the people in the community. think for more than a second before you post anything for fucks sake.

[bangsinc]

hiii i saw ur fic about spot with a neurodivergent reader, im autistic soo i really loved it but also! if you could do another one of those about ocd? i have that aswell and don't see it in fics much. either way i appreciate you including nd people in your fics :D!

⚪️Spot x Reader with OCD🖤

Im so sorry this is late! Anyways—thankfully— I got a lot of information about OCD as a disorder. Hopefully I didn’t get anything wrong, and if I did please let me know! It’s very important to me we get to see ourselves in our readers.

The spot has no bias for a neurodivergent partner. He sees them just as capable as him and anyone else—of course— it doesn’t mean he’s not going to do everything in his power to make your life easier. He’s mildly well-educated in most disorders, and he’s willing to adjust to his partners comfort. For example; If you two live together, he’ll try his best to clean up after himself and avoid a plethora of messes due to his experimentation.

Agressive or intrusive thoughts don’t bother him at all! He’s had his fair share of them, and of course, they’re called intrusive for a reason. They’re not something you want, and he won’t judge you or see you as weird or creepy for them.

Spot might do his own research in his own time to learn more about your condition and what he can personally do to help. Of course, he’s your boyfriend and not You’re therapist, so he’s not going to ask you anything personal. He’s not there to ‘fix you’.

If they’re bothering you to an extent, Spot will try to get you to be distracted from your compulsions. They’re not things that please you, they just ease anxiety, and of course, he’d rather you find healthier ways to calm yourself! Maybe you two can go out and do something you both like.

Spot doesn’t mind if you have Tics due to your OCD. If he’s cuddling you, or holding you or really doing anything with you, he brushes those movements aside if it makes you uncomfortable to comment on them.

He constantly reminds you that you’re doing great and he LOVES you so dearly. You’re perfect to him, and if you fret over a small mistake or if you’re worried you’d upset him, he’s quick to remind you that it’s okay. You never upset him! And accidents happen, it’s what makes you human. Even if you’re afraid you might act on a violent impulse and hurt him, he knows you wouldn’t because it isn’t who you are.

Not a very long headcanon, but he always reminds you that the stoves off. Or the lights were left off when you two left, or that he locked the doors.. just so you don’t need to worry about it.

If you’re on medication, he’ll make sure you take it regularly. Of course, he knows it’s definitely not something you’re going to really forget, but he would want to be reminded if he was in your shoes.

If a fear of an allergic reaction is bothering you, he’d want you to talk to him about it. Even if it’s something you know you’re not allergic to, or something you think is ‘dumb’, he understands you can’t help it. He wouldn’t want this issue to lead to compulsions of just not eating altogether either. The Spot couldn’t treat an issue like this himself, but he can try to push you into getting exposure responce therapy.

[merotwst]

GET TO WORK ! ‹ vice housewardens ›

⇝ . how they motivate you to study + tutoring you !

[ n: self indulgent bc i have no motivation to study whatsoever i jus want jamil to tell me to get my shit together or i'll fail my prelims n cry ]

⑇

⑇

⇝ trey clover ‹ heartslabyul ›

. ok, here's one person who would actually help you study.

. if you're a foodie, he would definitely help motivate by promising to reward you with something he'd bake personally just for you if you did well.

. i feel like he wouldn't encourage cramming tbh and so he makes it a point to check up on you and see if you're actually studying.

. if you have a hard time focusing, he'd definitely help you with that and introduce some study techniques that would work best for you.

. doesn't mind staying up late to help you.

. he's a liiiiiiiitle bit strict though. like, if he helps you study, you better make sure to TRY to get at least 80% marks

. or else he's gonna be disappointed.

. and that's so so so SO much worse than angry trey tbh.

. of course, he wouldn't put too much pressure on you if he knows your academic capabilities.

. but he definitely believes you can get high marks if you really apply yourself.

. overall, 10/10 for the study motivator score. not too lax, not too strict and will give you snacks.

⑇

⇝ ruggie bucchi ‹ savanaclaw ›

. wouldn't really care much abt ur grades tbh

. i mean, he gets it. studying isn't easy n all that as a regular student but as a magicless human with so much crowley's putting on your plate? yikes. yeah, he knows. especially for him considering how he's leona's errand boy and all + needs to also keep up with studies.

. if you asked him for help, he wouldn't mind tutoring you if he has time—that is, if you have something to offer him in return.

. i feel like ruggie's someone who really tries to put his mind into academics. mostly because opportunities like night raven college isn't an everyday thing where he came from and he can't afford (literally) to mess up

. and so he uses that to motivate you, reminding you about your future and all that if you couldn't go home. work, money, future plans n the likes.

. would be a pretty decent tutor tbh but expect a lot of bullshitting and goofing off with this boy

. would probably make up a game to help you get some info in if you're struggling with that

. is pretty patient as a tutor and is actually so much fun to be with

. 8/10. not too intimidating and is nice for a casual tutoring session. nothing too serious and he won't really bother checking up on your progress unless he's really invested in your study life.

⑇

⇝ jade leech ‹ octavinelle ›

. idk abt jade tbh...

. maybe i'm a bit biased bc he scares the living FUCK out of me but

. he would make a good tutor. he'd make sure you understand the lessons and probably has effective learning methods made specifically for you after analyzing your learning skills (shudders)

. he seems to have a long patience and that's good if you're not a quick learner but i feel like he would have this sort of sadistic method of teaching....

. like, he'd give you 20 points at the beginning of a session and everytime you make a mistake you lose a point

. he doesn't tell you what happens if your points reach zero

. he just gives you that terrifying smile he has

. your motivation to study is fear

. would definitely check on your progress in acads

. proud eel if you get high marks

. would get you a congratulatory gift free of charge (or is it)

. 7/10 im just scared of him

⑇

⇝ jamil viper ‹ scarabia ›

. im sorry

. he's the best out of all of them (totally not biased)

. ok but in all seriousness, jamil viper, if he's willing, will help tutor you and WILL make sure you improve

. if you're a slow learner, dw about it. this aint his first rodeo (kalim)

. is patient and gentle when he's teaching but has a sense of strictness to him. he makes sure you know the lesson and understand what he's talking about when he's explaining

. would make you explain the lesson back to him just to double check to see if it got through to you

. will make you practice quizzes and would lend you study guides he makes for the scarabian first years as well

. wouldn't have too much time to tutor you though :( but he's definitely monitoring your progress

. encourages you and would be SO proud if you got high marks <3333

. anything for you jamiii

. 100000000/10, best tutor. i'd perfect all my exams just to impress you, sir ackk

⑇

⇝ rook hunt ‹ pomefiore ›

. rook's a pretty chill guy, so he wouldn't mind giving you a bit of extra help if you need it

. another person who wouldn't care too much abt ur grades tbh

. he believes that as long as you try your best, whatever score you get is good (long as it isn't failing, ofc)

. would be pretty fun as a tutor. but unlike the others, if you said "man, fuck this i don't wanna study anymore", he'd just laugh and wouldn't really encourage you to continue studying

. honestly, rook just doesn't strike me as the academic type

. you'd probably end up doing other things instead of studying like idk scrolling through magicam or just chatting about stuff

. 5/10. a decent tutor.

⑇

⇝ ortho shroud ‹ ignihyde ›

. idk who their vice housewarden is

. oh fuck idk about ortho hmmm

. he'd be happy to help! but good luck on trying to keep up

. he'd explain things to you in the most complicated way possible

. ask idia to have 'idiot language' downloaded and installed so you understand him and he can level down to you

. he's got spirit, but just doesn't work out on your end

. 3/10, sorry baby im just too dumb

⑇

⇝ lilia vanrouge ‹ diasomnia ›

. little shit

. wouldn't be helpful AT ALL

. like, he'd tutor you for history, but any other subject? he'd just goof off

. and while studying history he'd get sidetracked telling you a story about this and that a couple hundred years back

. says he'll give you one of his candies if you do well on your next exam

. but if he sees that you're really struggling and desperate for help, then he'd level down and actually teach

. goes dad mode and reminds you that at the end of the day, grades would just be that and you should just do your very best

. he'd be proud of you either way

. 4/10. grandpa's just too silly to actually focus on helping you study.

[las-tortugas-ninja]

ok im gonna drop my character analysis on splinter/lou jitsu because im tired of people hating on him.

lets think about the circumstances he was in for moment. image you spent your life as a kickass action star only to get kidnapped by the person you loved and forced to fight in the battle nexus. you have to go through the grief of being betrayed by someone you shouldve been able to trust while now living in a chamber (which looks like it has just the poorest living conditions) and you have zero contact to the outside world, AND your ex who got you into this mess is using you for profit and throws you into fights you have no say in for peoples entertainment for who knows how long! i dont think its ever been stated how long he has been living like that!

now on top of all that imagine the moment you escape you get turned into a fucking rat. now i know its usually joked about but seriously being a rat does seem to really bother splinter and if you think about for like 5 seconds? yeah? why wouldnt it? he basically had his body changed in ways he did not consent to.

so yeah obviously after all that this guy is mentally ill as fuck and i bring all this up because of course it affects his parenting. imagine going through all that and now you have to be a dad to FOUR children (all of which are babies at this time) that you understand none of the biology of, and you have to raise them with ZERO outside support (seriously why doesnt anyone talk about that. what does he do if he needs someone to babysit them or one of them gets sick cause he aint a docter) all this combined makes me think yeah. ofc hes not gonna do a good fucking job.

and when the boys are teenagers and dont need the 24/7 supervision they did as babies. you see splinter spending a lot of his time watching tv melting into the recliner because * drum roll * he is depressed. i do not think he is lazy i think he is depressed and probably traumatized but he never had time to process that trauma because he had to be a dad.

because he spends so much time sulking in the living room his sons (specifically donnie) feel like he doesnt want to spend time with them and are reasonably upset with him.

so in the 22nd episode of the first season when splinter tricks donnie into entering the demolition derby. that was an eye opener for him to be better. he saw the absolute hurt in donnie’s eyes and tone of voice because he thought he wanted to spend time with him. that was the eye opener he needed to realize “oh shit. i really fucked up. i need to spend time with my sons. i need to be better for them.” and he apologizes to donnie because yeah, what he did wasnt okay.

and you can tell he changed for his sons because in “hidden city’s most wanted” you can tell all he wanted to do was spend time with mikey.

and the thing is there is nothing that can convince me his sons (and april to admitably) dont mean the fucking world to him. when draxum tells him that before him he had no purpose, that he was a husk of a man he says hes not lost anymore because he has his sons. his sons were the first thing he thought of when he needed a reason to why his life didnt fucking suck now.

this man went against the hamato clan teachings and almost got all of humanity killed for the sake of his sons. he loves his sons and he hasnt been great to them and he wants to change because he knows they deserve better. there is literally so much love emanating from this family.

a lot of people say that splinter is abusive/neglectful and im not denying that hes not perfect but jesus you can criticize his parenting without treating him like an irredeemable monster (because he is redeemable and he did change for the better)

also i know yall arent gonna wanna hear this but someones gotta say it cause its the truth: in general people will be harder on ethnic parents and treat them less like actual people capable of making mistakes. yes splinter is a rat but he is still ethnically japanese. he is a person of color and as someone whos been in fandom for awhile yeah people are suspiciously a lot more forgiving to white parents who make mistakes compared to when parents of color make them. i really do think its causing a bias.

[caracoloco]

i was gonna do like a long thing with all of my thoughts and favorite interactions of labru but im back in school and also doing social service and barely have any time for myself so this is not getting finished lol. anyways here are some my labru thoughts which honestly is not anything that anyone hasnt said already lol

shit my mom just showed me a video of boneless wings im sooo hungry.

there's something about narrative foils that just makes my head explode sometimes bc it's like two characters whose fundamental flaws perfectly complement each other and therefore you can see how they both develop after interacting with each other and imo that very easily leads into them developing deep respect and affection (at least in the labru case, bc in other cases it can lead to vicious hatred which is also great for me).

so what i mean by this is that kabru is the opposite of laios in several aspects:

-laios is obsessed with monsters/ hates humans despite what he may think, on the contrary kabru is obsessed with people/ hates monsters. and the noticable thing is that they both have the same intensity but due to kabru's charisma it is not seen as repulsive unlike with laios. that leads to the next point.

-kabru has like op levels of charisma and the skills to manipulate people to always get what he wants, on the contrary laios does not understand others and constantly makes mistakes bc he assumes goodwill out of others or is just unable to read the room which in turn makes him public enemy #1.

-another thing which is not as pointed imo is that kabru has as much skill in human combat as laios has with monsters. in the story this is the very reason why kabru finds it necessary (despite his annoyance) to support him as he realizes he is the most capable of defeating the mad sorcerer. then on the sidelines kabru did a lot of work in preventing him from getting killed by other people who saw him as insane which allowed him to get that far in the first place.

-laios is a very honest person, being a terrible liar and always saying what he thinks even if it makes the situation worse (like when he was trying to comfort senshi in the griffin chapter). again, opposite to that kabru constantly lies and carefully chooses his words to best fit the situation (and the person he is talking to) even if it is not a high-stakes situation. the one person who i'd say he is the most honest to is rin but even then i don't think he is the most vulnerable even with her.

-other not as relevant point which i noticed is that laios is actually really tidy compared to kabru. when you look at their rooms in the adventurer's bible laios has a lot more organization than kabru whose room looks like my room on bad week. that combined with the fact that the bar owner cleans the room for him makes me think that kabru is a lot less self sufficient than he appears, unlike laios that was living pretty alright since the return of his sister.

So i think those are their main parallels that stem from their central character trait of being obsessed with humans/monsters. which is interesting bc when kabru was first introduced he looked like the idealized version of a party leader with all of the traits laios lacked, but as the manga develops you realize that they really are two sides of the same coin and their interests are what makes them grow into very different people. (well their interests and their traumas/upbringing)

moving on to the story. the most interesting part in my opinion is the way that kabru's relationship and feelings towards laios go from interest to hatred to respect to friendship.

<not finished>

[salamander-eggs]

it feels that no matter where i go, or who i talk to, everyone i know is obsessed in some way with having a partner. mostly people in their 20s. everyone wants that special someone. and i know we can say oh this is just natural and innate to a human being and i think it is...

i know i want someone too. i want to write letters back and forth to someone, to have an exchange diary with them, i want to have someone to pour myself into. and i want to be loved, i want my ego fulfilled, i want flowers, gifts. even if i know in reality i wouldnt even know what to do with that situation, and it would be extremely unsettling to my view of myself and reality. i would end up staring at the flowers, confused, repulsed, that this person has given me flowers in this scenario. i would know that this person is only giving me flowers as some sort of pitiful gesture, trying most likely to bargain with me for some sort of thing they want from me, and not out of truly loving me. i could accept a bouquet of flowers that i myself found on the side of the road by mistake, but a bouquet of flowers from a man seems like the most sticky uncomfortable thing. and i would sit there, putting on my sticky happy face, making the whole room uncomfortable with my self-pity and awkwardness. i imagine the flowers being stiff, i can feel the stiff plastic wrapping. i can feel the transaction. i can feel my mind saying, look, are you happy now? you got what you wanted. and they arent your favorite kind of flowers, and he clearly doesnt want to give them to you, but look. you got flowers. i can see the look in his eyes of distaste. and when i think about that, i dont want a boyfriend at all, nothing even close to a boyfriend. i would rather get rid of the entire thing. like i understand, its clear to me im not meant to be in a relationship at all.

i also, at the same time, without really intending any pity or self-hatred, dont think i am capable at the moment of being a good girlfriend or someone anyone would want to date. i have handicaps in this department, i am not desirable to men as someone to date at all... i could go out there and get used again, whatever that means, but it will never solve the feeling of desire in me

this is also possibly, to some degree, related to the erosion of friendships and family and faith. and without faith, or friends, and without family, there is less and less solidity in our lives, and we look instead to one person, some ideal person, that can take on all of these roles. someone to have faith in a future with, to be our best friend, and to form a family with. so everyone obsesses over getting that special person, yet no one is ever happy, and the more you want them the less likely you will ever find someone good.

[kooksbunnnn]

im sorry but jungkook literally acts like he’s the victim when he’s the one who cheated, never communicated or told his wife what’s going on in his current life?

why is he acting like he needs sympathy when he was the one who choose to sleep with another person even though he was the one who was in a committed relationship why didn’t he cry and act like a victim too in that moment? i don’t know how to give a person advice when it comes to cheating because i refuse to give that person a second chance but if i was oc i think him crying, walking on eggshells around me, not telling me anything related to his job or life outside of our relationship and me only becoming aware of it by other people wouldn’t want me to reconcile and move forward if that makes sense? i mean she’s literally pregnant why does she have to be the dominant person and make decisions for both of them when he’s the one who’s at fault? she has so much on her plate and i don’t think she deserves any of this. she deserves to be doted on, cuddled and praised for carrying a tiny human being but instead has do deal with a overgrown man child and his problems because he’s not capable of getting anything done on his own. i also don’t want you to think im bashing your character but i just can’t for the life of me see them being happy when he doesn’t show any growth from his past actions that hurt her. im really trying to understand him i really do but i don’t like to see people acting like a victim or cry 24/7 for the things they have no right over to cry and only do it because they don’t know how to handle the situation.

i also think her being „horny“ and them sleeping together wouldn’t be a good idea she would literally blame herself and i also think that’s to soon for them. i just don’t think he doesn’t deserve any praise or her going soft on him. he did the bare minimum and i hope she doesn’t settle for that when she’s way more worth.

I love how you want my OC to have a happy life🥺 the thing with overthinkers is that they dont know how to communicate, me being one, I know this. Regarding Jungkook and his crying? this is a new thing to them, and its just something they've never done before. OC has confidence issues, and jk cheating on her made her believe it more that it was her who was the problem.

Jungkook is crying because he hates himself for what he did to OC, He cries because he caused that. He cries not because he wants to be the victim but because this is something he doesn't know if he could fix or not. They both love each other, but Jungkook has always made sure OC knows that she can leave him if she feels like it.

He is trying to make things better. Jungkook walking on eggshells and crying might seem like he's overdoing it and playing victim but ig us seeing it that way is because people who cheat are not genrally trying to make things better, so this seems unfamiliar. This is just my opinion.

Jungkook not telling OC about his decision is described in chapter 4.1, but if you did read it, I would just like to say that when someone doesnt know how to live normally after this kind of situation, he is also doing things that might work sometimes and might also fuck things up sometimes.

OC is not the common way of horny, she is the type of horny where she doesnt think its right to give in, wants to give in, cant co trol her own body because hormones, she just needs the comfort of her husband but thinks that her past self deserves better, but what about her future self? Present? It's just so complicated for her. So yeah, she is not the common way of horny. it's different, difficult.

This is a situation neither our OC nor Jungkook ever imagined they would be in, so they're doing progress together, and sometimes they both make mistakes. They're human and not calling cheating a mistake, but if they want to fix their relationship, they should understand at some point that communication is important.

Being vulnerable is not a weakness sometimes, it might strengthen their relationship. Every person deserves a happy ending, but maybe everyone's happy ending has their own definition.

Thank you for reading my story, and I ho estly love it when people tell me their thoughts about how they felt while reading the chapter. It makes the writer in me happy to know that I can make people feel things through my stories.

[simpjaes]

well, well, well. i may not even make sense with this one, but here we go: i've been meaning to get my mind of some things this weekend, and of course your writing would be the only thing capable of doing it. paid in & paid off just managed to make me feel exactly like the character you created for the reader, wishing i could live some fucked up situations and find it in myself to forgive people, bc we all do shitty things, even if it doesn't affect our morals!! sometimes we just want do to things we know we shouldn't, and it's okay to do it if we can live in terms with it. it is also okay to understand other people's choices and mistakes, and let it go. but im mostly a person who doesn't let go when things happen to me, and i believe im the most hypocrite and worthless person, even when i don't do shit (98% of the time). i truly just love how you choose to finish the story accepting jake's apology, and satisfying the need i created to see jay getting just the crumbs he barely deserved after showing himself the biggest asshole ever, and nothing more. i feel like with other writers, we'd have him being forgiven and getting what he wanted since the beginning - which he kinda gets - but probably in a redeemer way, and this would have been unsatisfactory, since i felt the reader's emotions so deeply. i usually hate when fics makes me feel negative feelings, but i just love how i felt them rn. seriously, i could actually keep going cause i have this need of being fully understood but i don't think i could do it writing in english, and i also believe i've said a loooooot already. so, thank you once again for choosing such new and different concepts and stories to write, in such a perfect way. i love your brain so much, and your ability to put it all into words and sharing it with us. thank youuuuuuu, and keep going cause you're doing fucking amazing 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

;-; im soft that you come to me to get your mind off things but i do want to apologize about how some of my fics can be pretty angsty and possibly a bit touchy when it comes to trying to be in a good headspace!!

"but im mostly a person who doesn't let go when things happen to me, and i believe im the most hypocrite and worthless person, even when i don't do shit (98% of the time)"

i don't like that u said this, try to be nicer to yourself. <3 a lot of us can't let go of things, everyone in this world is a hypocrite, it comes with the territory of being human, but you're not worthless so....ily, don't ever say that shit to me again bc you don't deserve that kind of self hate. [im not mad, im aggressively loving on u]

as for everything else, im really happy that the ending was fulfilling for you. as much as i wanted to let jay win, i loved jake's character too much to let him suffer. but also i do fully understand where you're coming from regarding your feedback!! im really thankful for it! i hope i can continue to write unconventional plot lines that you'll enjoy and love <3

[strangecassette]

im honestly just. really tired of people screwing me over and then acting like im the only asshole in the room. i own up to my fuckups, i take responsibility, and i try to be mature in handling situations. am i perfect? fuck fucking no. but i shouldnt feel ASHAMED of talking about my feelings on my own blog on the offchance someone is hate-lurking and poised to point and go, “see! youre talking bad about me so you ARE the evil villain monster bad guy of my personal story!”

cant people just be normal? i fucked up a friendship, i hurt someone i cared about, and we couldnt continue on because of what i did. i was an asshole, i was really unsure about my emotions and life decisions at a very unstable and vulnerable point in my life. how i handled that hurt someone that was ready to grow closer, and that was fucked up of me. i wont say that he doesnt have a right to be upset, he very much does, and our entire relationship was a clusterfuck. but... i really dont think i like the way things ended. maybe it was what he needed to feel better about it all, but i just dont think its mature or really morally acceptable to tell off every single person thats fucked up in your life. it wasnt “you really hurt me and i dont think i can forgive you, so im not going to speak to you anymore and i want you to leave me alone” it was “youre a liar” and “you dont deserve friends if this is how you treat them” when he knew that i have a serious fear of being a shitty person. not even to mention the weird thing he did where he added me to his group chat of friends, i told him about shitty past friends that ruined gcs for me, and then as soon as i do something wrong, i get removed so he can chat shit about me to complete strangers as if im a malicious abuser out to get him specifically. im a human fucking being and actually? i dont think im going to lie down and fucking take that shit anymore. cyrus, if youre reading this, stay off of my blog and learn to communicate maturely, because that fucking hurt me too and i dont think i wil bend over backwards to try and give you reasons why im worth keeping around. im not going to beg for anything from you and all i hope for you is that you get better, get better friends, and learn to communicate with them without acting like youre telling off a monster deserving of every vile, hurtful thing you can think of saying to them. goodbye.

[saintobio]

SY YN is gonna be my favorite yn of all fics I’ve read. Her character is complex. She’s very human and very relatable. She’s weak and strong at the same time. She’s proof that a kind and generous person is also capable in doing foolish mistakes yet brave enough to own them. There are only two things I see she made a mistake is first, she didn’t divorce Gojo immediately after finding out Sera and continuosly hoping for Gojo to love her at the end and second, her hiding Sachiro and faking the abortion. That’s it. Can’t understand the hate to yn and would like her to end with Toji cause that’s what she deserves. I am really disappointed with Utahime. But knowing yn, she’s definitely hurt because she feels like, Utahime chose Gojo over her, their friendship isn’t that much value for Utahime to disrespect and betray her like that no matter what Gojo and yn’s status is. Of course Gojo has a fair share of it too. He’s always the same, he always do what what he think isn’t right but still do it anyway. Always delaying in communicating things. I need to calm my nerves. Geez

Anonymous said

the previous ask about yn calling gojo her husband yn baby i really love u pls pls pls just get over gojo properly saint can u write me in as yn's bff I CAN FIX HER i can be her bestest friend in the whole word her therapist her maid her girlfriend her platonic soulmate whatever it is she NEEDS a proper support system that can steer her on a better path and not be associated with gojo, aside from her own family and toji. im taking back what i said about gojohime happening being painful, what's more painful is yn being this way. i hate how almost no one sees how she's literally coping terribly with everything and i also hate how she's refusing to get help from someone she knows or a therapist... it seems like she's giving up on life and sachiro is literally her only lifeline. i hate seeing her as a mess rn and for the future chapters of sy... saint i'll beg on my knees for yn's happiness and sanity 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 plsplsplspls my god this fic is always making me cry because i feel so sad for yn and in a way, im always in her position to feel that no one is on my side, everyone is against me and just kept on bottling my feelings till it explode later on :"))))) i wasn't fond of reading jjk self-insert fics but i came across sn and fell in love with yn's character. from the start of sn till now, im always on her side (though i do criticise her for some of actions because im aware that she do make mistakes) and yn is literally one of my four comfort characters in life aaaah she's the only reason why im willing to put myself in misery (from the fic) again and again im so sad

Anonymous said

I will always be on yn’s side, like wtf no one but her and sachi should have a happy ending, like I really hope Gojo’s relationship with uta crumbles, he needs to grow and learn on his own and not get his dick wet with every woman that gives him attention 🙄

Anonymous said

Saint, im gonna be completely honest. I dont think I can read chapter 8 🥲 and why do I imagine yn getting a literal broken heart medical diagnosis after all this ends. I dont think I can hold on to gojoyn endgame SY7 is so painful I have puffy eyes for the past couple of hours now. i dont think I can go on anymore (tho of this is a lie bc I have you on my notifications and I just wanna hurt someone) I just want yn to have eternal rest and see her mom. I have mixed emotions bc omg idk, i just dont know. Your heavy angst is godtier writing that I literally have no idea what to feel but cryh the fuck out of my tear glands. I just hope we can all get through this (especially yn, poor girl)

Anonymous said

i knew people were going to question why yn broke down after finding out about satoru and utahime. okay… as someone who experienced having a close friend and an ex suddenly getting together… it’s different if it’s someone you know and trust. i know she told satoru to move on, but of course, she never told him to move on WITH MY BEST FRIEND. i also read someone say before that toji and satoru aren’t even friends but utahime and yn are… and not only friends but BEST FRIENDS. so before anyone compares it, IT’S DIFFERENT. give yn a break… y’all have been invalidating her feelings ever since sn. 💀

Anonymous said

I don't think yn feeling betrayed when utahime and satoru got together is invalid at all, I mean if my best friend got together with my ex husband who is also my baby daddy, I too would feel betrayed. Especially with all this drama is going on, the least she could have done is wait for satoru and yn to sort out their feelings and then try her turn with satoru.

Anonymous said

This chapter hurt so bad. Y/n definitely has every reason to be sad or hurt. There’s a difference between dating ur exes rival than sleeping with your exes best friend in my opinion. Utahime’s loyalty lies with Yn. In which she just broke by sleeping w her ex husband knowing all the damage he caused her (vise versa). Toji doesn’t owe gojo any loyalty so in my lil head it’s different . IM SO MAD FOR YN SHE HANDLED THAT BETTER THAN ME LMAOAOOAOAOAOA I would’ve been throwing hands cuz wtf.

Good chapter as always saint 🥲 you always know how to pull at my heart strings .

Anonymous said

ofc yn doesn’t own utahime or gojo and they can do whatever they want, but friendship requires loyalty too and imo, that means not hooking up with an ex on an ongoing basis and hiding it. i don’t think it’s fair to expect yn to keep being friends with utahime after that, especially considering yn said she wanted to get rid of anything that reminded her of gojo and move on. yn in the story is definitely a better person than i am lmao if i was in that situation i doubt i would care about him breaking utahimes heart.

also, just something i was wondering!! utahime mentions she’s falling in love with gojo — how long have they known each other at this point, and are her feelings more infatuation/wanting to fix him than actual love? sorry if you already answered this somewhere and i missed it.

yn is very emotionally flawed, we can’t deny that. she also makes questionable decisions, but her character is just innately unselfish that you feel bad for her sometimes 🥲 at least that’s how i feel when i have to write her pov i’m always like “damn, it’s ok girl you got this”. anyways, still so glad to see yn defenders in the ask box!! :)))

*edited bc i forgot to answer the last question. for a couple of months now, like 4-5? it’s not actual love. just infatuation and “i can’t stop thinking abt you” type of admiration

[prettyboykatsuki]

Hey Ari. This might be kind of a weird and obvious question? But do you think having a partner has kind of influenced how you look at love? Because I don’t know, you post your thoughts about it a lot and I’ve always been more cynical about people and their intentions and romantic relationships in general because of personal stuff, but I also have never had someone like your boyfriend myself, and I’ve never had someone love me like that I don’t think I ever will because I’m me. I guess what I’m asking is how do you manage to always see life and love as so beautiful?

HI!!!!!

this isn't weird at all. i think in general i get this question a lot and for good reason since generally i have a very optimistic view of the world which is very ironic. i want to be clear im a very flawed person with many things that i personally struggle with especially in love. i struggle a lot with letting people know me or getting to know people. if we talk consistently im putting in a lot of effort bc i have a tendency for solitude. i love the people i talk to very deeply.

my boyfriends influence on my life has been profound. while i'd be devestated if we ever broke up, i think i would still be okay in the long run. before he's that i think he's the person i trust and care about more than any single person in the entire world because he is a profoundly loving partner. but he's also a good, kind, capable person.

i was also under the impression for a long time that i would never find love. there were many points in my relationships where i self-sabotaged because i felt undeserving. i had such a negative image and such a limited self-worth. even when i put in so much effort for so much of my life i couldn't push past the idea that i was a horrible human being. and i didnt want that from him. i tried leaving more than once in a very irrational low.

but i remember at a very low point in my relationship my boyfriend said something like "you trust me with every other choice ive made except loving you" and it completely shifted my view point. he was so right. why was it that i could let him do everything but love me?

ive always beeen enamored with romance. but allowing someone to love me without condition is still very hard because i don't know if i believe im a good person. my biggest lesson for people like that, like me - is that love is not something you earn or ask for. and compassion for life is something you develop with time.

when you find love, the hard part is not loving. it is letting yourself be recognized, acknowledged, cared for. to let someone scold you and know they will still love you the next day. acceptance that you will make mistakes and when you do - it's your responsibility to learn and grow from them. you are born with flaws and you will have flaws until you are dead.

and a persons choice to love you, really love you means that you understand they know that and you work on yourself because you love them too.

love, most of all, is an acknowledgement of a persons agency. their wholeness. when you acknowledge people that way and life that way - you learn peoples treatment of you is reflective of that wholeness. and the only way to see someone and love them is facing the challenge of your own life - you get me?

the best way to believe in love and celebrate life for me was to remember how having hope in my heart has helped me want to live. love and compassion and celebrating the world has helped me heal that discontent in my heart.

you have to learn to stop looking for the exit if you want to live a warm life. my boyfriends consistency was a blessing, but i also worked very hard to reach that in myself.

nothing about me is engimatic. im just one of my many and i think you will also be capable of love and being loved so completely.

i dont consider myself a very warm or bright person. but with time and patience and a lot of self-reflection - i came to terms with the only way to live life for me was to see it with compassion and empathy. i think love saved my life, and love for living is the only thing that helped my grow. it's all about my mindset, and my boyfriend has contributed greatly to changing that mindset.

but most of who i am started with me. it takes time and willpower. ive dedicated much of my life to the cause of wielding love. if you dont know about relationships, you can always start at you. but really there's nothing special about it.

[ailuronymy]

i wasn't sure which blog to send this ask to, but i have a question ab my fanfiction. im trying to write my main character's father, who is in a different colony. it's sort of a leafcrow-type situation, where he had a forbidden relationship with the main character's mother and then took another mate in his own colony to appear loyal. however, the father character is much more manipulative and could be read as abusive. (1/?)

(2/2) my main problem is that i'm trying to write this father figure much more realistically and morally-gray instead of being a one-dimensional villain. at the same time i don't want it to seem as if i'm writing this abusive person (cat? idk) as a misunderstood bad boy archetype. i'm trying to go off of personal experience to write him but that's made it very hard to stay objective. any advice?

Hello there! I’d like to start out by asking you a couple of questions first. 

1. Why do you think fiction writing has to be “objective”?  2. What is the worst that happens if you do--on purpose or by mistake--write this character as a “misunderstood bad boy archetype”? 3. Who are you afraid of?

I’m asking you these questions because this ask you’ve sent me radiates a lot of fear, and I think you will benefit from identifying and understanding where your anxiety around this is actually coming from. I can have a good guess, though.

It seems to me that you are living in a kind of dread that if you have a villain too human, there will be consequences and I imagine that’s because there’s a vocal subsect of people who don’t have better things to do with their time than wailing that the downfall of society is nigh, because [mumble mumble] people reading and/or writing fiction, [something something] fiction impacts reality. It was a tired and severely flawed argument when the Victorians and Puritans did it, and it still is now, but it’s said with so much conviction by these people that I’m not surprised it sticks around. 

The thing is, there will always be bad faith actors and stupid people who will misrepresent or misinterpret your writing. The world is full of different people, and some of those people just... aren’t clever and aren’t kind and don’t think things through before they start talking at top volume. There is no amount of perfect you can be, as a writer, that will inoculate you from potential criticism (including really dumb, blatantly wrong criticism). The only way to avoid ever risking that is simply never to make art--and that’s no way to live, and I don’t recommend it.

I think this is what’s weighing on your mind. Between the lines, I can see you saying that you want to write this character based on your own experiences, which are emotionally charged and biased (because you are human), as someone complex and even likeable in moments, who has reasons for why he acts they way he does (and some of them might even be good reasons). You want to write him as a puzzle that isn’t easily solved by cutting him out of your character’s life or by the power of love suddenly curing him of all the terrible things he’s capable of. 

When we talk about “problematic” (properly, not in silly internet gotcha lingo), this is what it means: it presents a problem that isn’t easily resolved; it presents a nuanced and tangled problem, one that often has good elements as well as bad, and which is inextricable to the greater situation and causes run-on impacts if moved, or changed, or removed. Problematic as a word lets us talk about these kinds of ideas, typically in neutral ways--because a problem isn’t necessarily bad, it’s just difficult to navigate. The world is made of problems. 

Anyway, what I’m trying to say is there’s no trick I can offer you when it comes to writing this character. You will have to learn by doing, as is unfortunately the case with almost all writing in my experience. However, if it brings you any peace of mind, I’ve written many characters who I would describe as nuanced people, and some of them are also villains in other characters’ lives. 

For example, I’ve written a whole story from Brokenstar’s perspective, in which he sees himself and his actions as entirely justified, and would do it all again. I’ve written about Blackfoot, who is a murderer and has no real inner turmoil about that. I’ve written about Palebird (Palefeather, in my story) who is a neglectful mother working through her own troubles, and for whom there’s no explicit closure with her son. I’ve also written about Mudclaw, who is infamous for the part he plays in the Windclan civil war, and who is convinced he is justified in what he does. 

Are these characters bad people? Or good characters? I don’t get to decide that and I don’t feel the need to label them any particular way anyway, but I always strive to write them first and foremost as people. I want them to feel real and grounded in their own logic and reasoning. The rest of the interpretation I see as kind of not my business. Readers will read what I write in a myriad of different ways, because they are all different people. So far this approach has served me well, so I can recommend focusing on writing the story you want to tell and make your characters feel real. Good luck with your writing!

[xpeachesncream]

perfectly wrong | thirteen

summary: there were rules that had to be followed: no one could know about you two, there was no ‘getting to know each other,’ and there was absolutely no emotional attachment allowed. if this could be done, there should be no complications. but somehow, the rules always get bended.

pairing: reader x fuckboy!kth

genre: college au | fluff, angst, smut

words: 2.3k

chapter warnings: cussing, soft tae

notes: down to 2 chapters left! i will most likely do some drabbles every now and then for this, but not right away because i’ll be working on my new fic: acquainted. will let you know when this goes live, but pls check it out. it’s gonna be messy and filthy as hell, im sorry lmao

tags: @soulstaes​ @apollukee​ @imluckybitches​ @btsis7okay​ @ppangiiroo​ @gee-nee​ @enchantaeduniverse​ @miinoongi​ @thedarkwinterrose​ @levrantae​ @somewhereofftheglobe​ @jwlmnbt​ @symmetricaleyeliner​ @bluesharksandfish​ (pls msg me if you would like to be added to the taglist!)

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Taehyung slouched on his couch, tv on whatever the hell channel it was on. He scrolled through his phone aimlessly, but it wasn't long before he huffed and threw his phone aside. He wasn't feeling himself, or anything for that matter, and was tired of being in this funk. He felt terrible about how everything went down and he couldn't really forgive himself for the shit he said to you. He didn't mean the things he said, but he was also the one who didn't know how to properly process feelings. He always acted on impulse and how he felt at that moment, rather than thinking about the situation rationally. Plus yeah, he had a temper. Shit didn't mix.

"Ayo." He hears Jimin's voice at the door, followed by three soft knocks.

"It's unlocked." Tae says. Jimin welcomes himself in and kicks his shoes aside. He smiles at him, holding something in his hands as he walks into the kitchen. "What's up?"

"Uh, found these at your door." He holds up the prints Tae bought from you. He sighs and shakes his head, almost dismissing it entirely.

"Keep it."

"Um, no? You bought these for a reason, so you should keep them."

"Not anymore." Taehyung lays his head back against the couch and shuts his eyes.

"You're so dramatic. I'm leaving these here."

"Whatever."

"What's wrong with you now, princess?"

"I'm just not in the mood."

"You haven't been in the mood.." Jimin sits on the other end of the couch. "And quite frankly, it's pretty annoying. You know what you did wrong, so why don't you just fix it?"

"It's not that easy."

"Says who? You?" Jimin scoffs. "Look, I know our track record isn't the best, but I know you genuinely care about Y/N. I know she means more to you than what you put out there, so why can't you just take it for what it is? Why do you have to make it so complicated?"

"Because I'm sure by now she hates me and wants nothing to do with me. It's exactly one of the things I'm afraid about the most. What if she gives up or realizes she doesn't want me the way I want her?"

"Do you think she's worth it?"

"I just-"

"Yes or no?" Taehyung looks at him as he leans over onto his knees.

"Yes, I do."

"Then none of that shit should matter. I'm positive she cares about you just as much as you do for her. If she's worth it, then you'd be willing to go through these ups and downs with her and do this ride with her."

"She's not going to want this after what I did, Jimin."

"You're full of excuses." Jimin shakes his head. "Then you do what you can to fix this and show her how you'll change, rather than just saying you'll do this and that."

"I don't know." Is all Taehyung can say. "I was pretty hurtful."

"You're also human. It's okay to make mistakes, but you should really work on processing your feelings better and communicating. Plus, your temper, dude. Tone that shit down."

"It's been so long since I've done this." Believe it or not, Taehyung was the complete opposite before. His last, serious relationship a couple of years ago made him flip the switch. He gave his ex everything, and was always willing to put his life down for her. He gave and gave, even if he felt like he couldn't anymore. He did all this just to get fucked over in the end, which is why he ultimately didn't believe relationships were worth the energy anymore.

"Y/N is not your ex. Stop comparing it to that. No experience will be the exact same."

"Ughhhh, I fucked this all up." Tae groaned, tilting his head back and covering it with his hat.

"I'm just saying, you could still try and fix this. Even in the end you two don't get together or whatever, you can at least say you tried. I'm tired of you moping around like you can't do shit to make it better. You know what she means to you."

"I'm not moping."

"Yes, you are! Look at you, looking like a sorry ass." Jimin threw his crumpled napkin at him. "Don't pass up on a good girl like that."

"Okay, I get it."

"No, I don't think you do." Tae looked at him. "Look, if this was any other girl, I probably wouldn't care much. But Y/N is genuinely different and I see how you both look at each other. It's really obvious how much you two ended up caring for each other."

"She is different. God, she's.." Tae sighs as he runs his hand through his hair. "She's beautiful and sweet, with just the right amount of mean. She's creative and her voice has always been so soothing. I want her around me all the time, even when she gets frustrating as hell." Jimin smiles.

"If you pass on her, she's mine." Jimin teased, knowing it would rub Taehyung the wrong way.

"Fuck you." Taehyung spat. "I should still beat your ass for the shit you pulled at the club."

"It was harmless." Jimin laughed. "So are you fixing this or what?"

"If I fix this, you need to stay 10 ft away from her." Jimin laughed out loud and held his stomach.

"Cry baby. I'm not gonna do anything." Jimin came and patted him on the back. "I'm sure everything will be just fine." And so, Taehyung gets himself up to go and fix this. He knew it wasn't going to be easy but he needed to right his wrongs.

Taehyung sat in his car and gathered himself together before he made his way up to the apartment. He gave off three knocks before he waited patiently for the door to swing open.

"I have to be honest, it's taking everything in me to stop myself from fucking you up right now." Jungkook sighed and stepped aside to let him in.

"That's fair."

"So, what's up? Why did you need to come here to talk to me?"

"I just wanted to apologize for how things went down at Jin's party."

"I appreciate it, but it still doesn't change the fact that you disrespected Y/N and talked down on her the way you did."

"I know, and I didn't mean any of it. I just wasn't thinking. If I'm being completely honest, I was pretty jealous of your relationship with her."

"What is this, high school?" Jungkook stopped himself from taking it any further because he could say a lot more to his face, but he wasn't going to since Taehyung made the effort to come here and apologize in person.

"Okay, I get it, it's childish."

"At least you're aware." Jungkook paused before shaking his head. "Look, not that it should even matter or anything, but all I knew growing up was Y/N and Jin hyung and vice versa. I didn't have any siblings or any cousins that could relate to me. I moved a lot before I finally settled with my family. I didn't get along with people easily, which is why when I met Y/N, we got really close and I stuck by her. We were similar, but different. It's always been that way, and quite frankly, it's not going to change." Taehyung nodded. "She doesn't have her family by her side, so me, hyung, Yoongi and Hoseok became that for her."

"I know, I'm sorry. I just kept thinking you two had it for each other like that and I couldn't understand why it was making me so upset."

"I love Y/N, I really do. But at the end of the day, she's her own person and she decides how to live her life. It's her life and I'm only in it." Jungkook shrugs. "I want nothing more than for Y/N to be happy with someone who can give her the world and cherish her for who she is. She has so much to offer and she brings life to everything around her."

"I-" Taehyung paused. "I really care about her. And I know this probably sounds stupid coming from me, but I want to do things differently with her."

"I just have to ask - are you even sure of your own feelings? You're not doing all of this cause you're lonely and have no one else to go to?"

"No, of course I'm sure of my feelings." Jungkook shrugged.

"You've been messing around with so many girls for some time now, though."

"Yeah and I also stopped doing that for awhile now."

"It's just hard to believe because I'd hate for her to have to go through it if you go back to your old ways."

"I won't."

"But that's easy for you to say, isn't it?" Kook shot him a look. All of a sudden, this conversation felt more like an interview but Jungkook had to do what he had to do. He knew what Taehyung was capable of, and he would hate for you to go through it again.

"Yeah it is, but she makes me want to be a better man." Jungkook sighed. He saw the look in Taehyung's face and he couldn't completely say it was all bullshit. He had never seen this kind of soft expression come from someone like Taehyung. "I haven't felt this way in a really long time, and it's scary for me. But she's worth it."

"I get that." Jungkook nods. "She cares about you a lot, you know? She may not say it but I saw how beat up she was over this entire thing."

"I want to fix this."

"I have to be honest, I'm a little wary. You really have to keep your word about doing better and not slipping up. She doesn't deserve it." Taehyung nods.

"I hear you." Taehyung pauses. "How is she?" Jungkook shrugs.

"Fine, except for the fact that she's sick right now." Taehyung's eyes widen.

"Is she alright?"

"Yeah. If you haven't figured it out already, Y/N isn't the type to back down." Taehyung chuckled.

"Yeah, I got that much."

"Hey," Jungkook tilted his head to look at him once more. "I really do respect the fact that you came here to talk to me in person. I know we don't know much about each other, but I know Y/N can see good in you." Taehyung nodded silently.

"Only trying to right my wrongs here. I don't want to slip up and lose her already."

"So, have you talked to hyung yet?" Taehyung looked at him and shook his head.

"No, but that's where I was headed after this." Kook nods silently. The two talk for a bit more, making sure they were on the right page, enough to put the past behind them and move on from the petty, unnecessary drama that had went down. When Taehyung had felt satisfied tackling one of the biggest hurdles, he made his way over to the cafe to tackle the last one. Not gonna lie, Taehyung was scared for this encounter because he knew Jin would lay his life down for you. Luckily for him, Jin was a wise man and never held grudges. Of course he didn't appreciate how Taehyung handled himself and this whole thing, but it wasn't entirely his fault and Jin always thought holding onto negativity was a waste of energy.

Jin happily greeted him, like his usual self, and brought him to the back so they could talk. Taehyung was sweating bullets, but he knew if he wanted to be in your life, he'd have to make it right with Jin. For Aiko, for the things he said and the things he's done to hurt you, everything. And so he sympathetically apologizes as he sits in front of Jin. Apologizes for the way things went down at the party, for Aiko, for having hurt anyone in this situation. Jin gave off a small, toothless smile and told Taehyung how he appreciated him for coming by. Quite frankly, he wanted to kill him as soon as you had told him about everything that had gone done between the both of you, including finding out about Aiko. Although the whole thing with Aiko was unfortunate, he couldn't really be mad because she was never his to begin with. The only thing he was really worried about was you, his baby cousin. Baby sister. Taehyung confessed that he had been feeling pretty lost because he believed you wouldn't want anything to do with him after that night. Jin reassures him and does a damn good job of it, telling him that you would never completely shut someone out, especially if you cared about them. Jin could tell how much you ended up caring for the guy and he wasn't going to make you change your mind about it because you were grown, and you could make your own decisions. He would only be there to support you and reassure you if times got tough. He didn't know Taehyung enough to immediately label him as a bad guy and right now, he was only showing he had some good in him.

They continued to talk for a bit [while Jin still had the time, at least], with Jin trying his best to coach him about how to best proceed with this situation. Of course, it was entirely up to Taehyung how he wanted to do this, but Jin could afford to sprinkle in a little bit of help.

"You're really sure about this, right? I don't want her to get hurt again. Y/N deserves all the best, and if a man were to ever come into her life, I'd want him to take good care of her and spoil her without her having to ask for it. I'd want him to be sure of her and to never make her question her worth." Taehyung nodded.

"I hear you, and I'm sure. It's scary, but I want to do this with her."

[pomegraniteseeds]

On God/Goddess Wrath

This is a topic I’ve been really wanting to address in serious detail with the information coming from Tiktok recently. Gods from ANY pantheon are capable of being mad or disappointed at you, but there’s some misconceptions on this wrath and what it looks like to worshipers. So if ur in need of some reassurance, want to start worshiping deities. or want to start working with them this post is for you! 

I have indeed experienced Gods being mad at me. When I cannot get around to my worship to Ares as much as my other deities, I feel less powerful as myself. I feel his presences just being dissapointed in me. One time, I accidentally disrespected Zeus by making a joke about the rain, a small droplet of water got into the crack of my phone during the storm and turned the touch screen of for 3 days! Another time, I really disrespected Aphrodite on accident by agreeing to worship her and then not being able to handle it and having to go back on my word. I was given cramps, zits, and graying hair?! (im 17 and my family does NOT grey young) But in my experience, these are the worsts things I have ever had to go through.

I will say, everyone has a different relationship with the Gods. But, from what I’ve noticed, people often have very similar trends with them too. I notice a lot of divination with Apollo for most of us is using tarot. I’ve noticed for multiple worshipers/devotees to Ares, use shufflemancy! These things are not really a coincidence, the Gods do have patterns. They aren’t going to change their whole personalty from person to person, I mean what would be the point in that? Check those trends out, they will give you a lot of information on what you are or going to experience! When I say different relationship, I mean something along this line. Ares has always presented himself to me as an older brother figure, who loves me dearly but is stern with me. But he isn’t afraid to joke around with me and I’m not with him. Others may keep their relationship with Ares more formal, and thats okay too!!!

But no matter how different relationships can be, the Gods are NOT going to try to kill you. They are NOT going to make you feel unsafe. If they are actively making you fear and are sending you terrifying messages like threatening to kill you for a mistake, then you are NOT working with a god . (Ahem ahem...tiktok) I mean....if something is trying to kill you doesn’t that logically sound more like an evil entity then Apollo’s presence being with you as you pick out a necklace....just saying.

A common argument to this idea of the Gods not harming you (Why is there an argument to this ill never know) is “hAvE yoU eveN ReaD tHe mYtHS?” I have a lot to say on this subject;

 1.) Anyone whos seriously worshiping a deity is indeed going to read their myths like...come on stop assuming everyone doesn’t do their research. 

2.) Myths involving wrath are invoked when something CRAZILY disrespectful happens between a God and man. Like CRAZILY disrespectful. Lets take a look at Hermes myths of wrath for example. Demanding bribes, devouring visitors, calling Hermes a “common thief”, scouring the Gods..etc. These are things no worshiper would even do on accident, lets be real. These are the things that caused that serious, godly wrath in myth. Serious acts of blasphemy would cause that wrath, not a simply mistake like the wrong candle on an alter. 

3.) This point is more opinion based but. Myths were not written by the Gods themselves, but by people. And I personally do not think something written by a human could ever fully contain the true intentions, ideas, or thoughts of a God. Myths were also made to teach lessons back then as well, so in that sense, not all your research on a deity should be based on mythology. If mythology is the only book your reading on deities, your doing it wrong.

Honestly worshiping the Gods has been life changing for me. It has brought nothing but positively into my life. Even when mistakes occur, the Gods understand I’m still learning and growing. They forgive and never go rougher on me then I can take. They love me, and I love them. They are going to do the same to you. <3! 

[astrologysvt]

What are your thoughts abot the recent news about mingyu being a school bully?

hi! so i wasn’t going to be commenting on this but i’ve spoken to a few friends about this and i figured id put my thoughts out there in case anyone is feeling anxious and hopefully it can ease their minds a little bit. 

ive looked into the situation and understand that there is still a lot that isn’t clear, a lot that was lost in translation, and some aspects that are highly circumstantial and based in perspective. i’m not about to comment or invalidate/validate any single direction/statement/thought process. what i will say is i think bullying is awful and no aspect of it, no matter when it occurred or the circumstances, should be excused. being an idol does not give anyone a free pass to not accept responsibility for their actions when called out. 

what i will say is that if you’re struggling with this recent news i hope it brings to light the flexibility we need to have when understanding/perceiving our idols. when i heard about this situation, and pretty much every single bullying scandal ever in kpop, i wasn’t shocked. people are capable of doing stupid, awful, and mean things -- especially when we are young. i always struggle to feel pressed whenever news like this comes out (and maybe this is a personal flaw of mine) but i personally do not have the energy to try and hold a third person account of something that happened 10+ years ago over a person who has performed a lot of good now in their adult life. i dont say that in an attempt to invalidate the victim’s experiences because no matter how incidental, unintentional, or minor such an act was on mingyu’s end in terms of bullying -- that doesn’t mean it couldn’t have long lasting effects on someone else’s self-esteem and mental health. with that being said, i try to be empathetic to all perspectives in this situation because the reality is everyone is capable of hurting others. there are people i know who have hurt me deeply that i wouldn’t fault now for their actions, and similarly there are a lot of things ive done that i deeply regret and i simply hope that if i were ever in mingyu’s position that those who ive intentionally/unintentionally hurt would offer me even just a small bit of human forgiveness and understanding as as we both reflect on the situation as adults. i honestly just see the victim’s own personal attempt at speaking about her situation as an attempt to process her own trauma with the situation, and i think stan/idol culture is skewing our ability to accept this reality while also understanding that our idols can still be redeemable years after doing those things. i don’t think it’s particularly fair that we’re using the victim’s attempt at airing out her grievances as a kind of fandom fuel. i feel this way whenever there is a serious issue in kpop. i feel like it should be a given that our idols could be capable of these things, and that we shouldn’t take these scandals with actual important issues to discuss as merely a “fandom” issue. like even tho i don’t hate mingyu now, nor do i feel like i need to choose whether or not i should unstan svt -- that doesn’t mean i can’t empathize or validate the victim’s experiences. tbh to me it just feels tone deaf. like “i see mingyu all the time and it hurts because no one knows what i’ve gone through and he’s being put on this pedestal as a perfect human being who can do no wrong meanwhile im still trying to process a lot of personal issues” and instead of being like “wow that must be difficult and seeing him must be super counterproductive to any progress you try to make. it must feel like for every two steps you take you take three back and simply by hearing him sing on the radio” -- fandom culture now pits these two people against each other, either paints her as solely a victim and now mingyu as the villain or vice versa where she’s attempting slander and mingyu still cant do no wrong. like tbh i think it’d be super validating to her if, adult mingyu now, addressed what he had done in the past and asked for forgiveness and promised her that the person she sees now succeeding isn’t the same person who hurt her all those years ago. maybe shed be able to hear svt songs and not have it set her progress back. i just don’t think the way fandom handles these things is fair if i am being honest, and i think it’s possible to wish for the best for both of them. 

i think the biggest thing people struggle in these situations is having to face the reality that maybe our idols aren’t good people. to that i have to say that the reality is more than likely far less exciting than that. mingyu, the rest of svt, and every idol out there are not extraordinarily good or bad people. they’re just people we’ve stumbled across that we’ve gotten attached to. they’re likable people but they’re also flawed. i don’t think a person needs to be perfect in order to be likable, and i think it’s possible to hold our idols accountable for their mistakes while also investing in their success. its just what humans do.