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im-sleepdeprived · 2 months

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Seasonal • Pt. 4

pairing: peter parker x reader

summary: inspired by the taylor swift song ‘peter’ where you and peter discover just how hard it is to hold on to something from your past, no mater how much you love each other

a/n: you guys i hate it here, like i actually just want them to make out already, also to the person who commented a couple chapters ago saying they wanted to see peter’s pov, this is for u

warnings: awful descriptions of photography (im not a photographer im so sorry pls lets all just ignore it), reader just straight up dipping in every situation, jealous pete lmao, reader trying to be mad, also i made peter super hot, like, more hot than usual (i was ovulating) ok bye

masterlist, read part 1, part 2, part 3

Peter had always known he would be with you. It was only a matter of when. When would he get the balls to act on his never-ending crush?

For a minute there, he had you. He felt like he owned the world. You wanted him, you loved him, and he thought the wait was finally over. This was the moment all the other moments in his life had led to.

He’d never told you (nor will he ever) but he’d never done a project on astronomy. That night you’d helped with his wounds after he’d crashed on your fire escape (the night he was hurt and all he had wanted was to see a familiar face, and his first thought was you), the night you’d told him you had a special interest in stars, he’d went home and stayed up all night to learn everything he could about them.

After doing that for several days, he took a night off patrolling to swing around the whole city (and a little further, if he were being honest) to find the perfect spot for your little stargazing date.

He just wanted everything to be perfect for you, always. It was why he used to wake up an hour earlier every day before school and grab you a cup of your favorite coffee from your favorite cafe. It was why he made sure to pay extra attention in your least favorite classes, the ones you struggled with the most, so he could help you with your homework and notes because he knew you’d need it. It was why he tied your shoelaces every time they came undone and you just ignored it. He held open every door, he cooked sometimes (though poorly), and he randomly bought you flowers and left you little notes everywhere.

All he wanted was for you to be completely happy. Which is why he had to end things. Every part of his heart disagreed, every inch of his bones disagreed. But he knew the reality of the situation, and he couldn’t do that to you.

Peter couldn’t leave you stuck in a dorm room, missing out on parties or hang outs with your friends, waiting for him to call. He couldn’t be the reason your phone was stuck in your face 24/7, worrying about him. He couldn’t have you staying up till 3AM waiting for him to send you a text telling you he was okay, that patrolling that night had gone well. Even if it hadn’t.

College was so important to you. You’d tried to downplay it to him but he knew how much you were looking forward to this, and he couldn’t be the one to take away from that experience.

He didn’t transfer back here for you.

Or at least, that’s what he spent countless hours and sleepless nights trying to convince himself. New York was his home, it needed him, it needed Spider-Man, May was getting older, he should be close to her, Columbia was a great school, it was his first choice. The fact that you went there was just a perk.

Or a con.

He wasn't sure anymore because seeing you here, in front of him for the first time in years, it left him breathless.

Peter was always a romantic, though he’d be loathe to admit it. He wanted that one true love, he wanted someone to come home to and talk about his day with, and afterwards he would listen to theirs. He wanted late night talks, early morning confessions. Dancing in the kitchen while food cooked on the stove, getting so lost in each other’s eyes that it almost burns. And he genuinely thought you two would find your way back to each other somehow, because he’d known since he was a little boy it would always be you.

But now he’s started to wonder if just because it would always be you, that might not mean he would actually get to have you.

Because there’s a man beside you.

He’s holding your waist.

And you’re not pushing him away.

“Ace?” Asked the man (who looked nothing like Peter, by the way, and it was driving him insane). Now Peter never considered himself a violent person. As a preteen and an early teenager, he’d been puny and weak, but even after he’d became Spider-Man he never liked to resort to violence unless absolutely necessary. But right that moment, he felt an inexplicable, almost primal rage he’d never felt before. And he wanted to punch this man in the face. Yeah, that sounded like it could help.

“Yeah,” you laughed. “Old nickname.”

The man beside just narrowed his eyes slightly, which didn’t help Peter’s urge to sock him in the face. He watched as his grip around you tightened and the man pulled you in closer, almost possessively. “Introduce me babe.”

Babe? Was this guy for real?

“Oh right,” you shook your head slightly and let out another slightly too high-pitched laugh and Peter almost felt bad for putting you in such an awkward position. “James, this is Peter. He’s an old friend of mine from high school. Peter, this is James. My boyfriend.”

Peter’s heart sank. He shouldn’t have been surprised, and he wasn’t. He could tell by the way James was holding you, the way he called you babe (which was tacky in Peter’s opinion. You deserved something a little more special than ‘babe’ ugh) but hearing you say it? He was afraid he might blackout.

He hadn’t expected you to go celibate or anything, but damn. Hearing you call someone else your boyfriend fucked with him in ways he’d never experienced.

He could see the shock in your eyes, the disbelief as you stared at him as if you couldn’t really trust yourself to see what you were seeing.

“So…how’ve you been?” He asked casually, as if his heart wasn’t racing out of his chest right then, and he knew yours was doing the same.

Your brows furrowed, “I—I’m good, wait,” you scoffed and closed your eyes tightly before opening them again. “What are you doing here Peter?”

Right. You didn’t know. Fair enough, he hadn’t told anyone until everything was already set in stone. “I just transferred in this semester. I go here now.”

And if he thought your eyes couldn’t get any wider, he was wrong. He almost thought that they’d fall out of your head.

“What?!”

The shock was written all over your face, but…there was something else, something he couldn’t quite place. After years of knowing you, it was concerning to him that he might not be able to read you as well as he used to.

Peter wasn’t sure what kind of reaction, exactly, he was expecting, but it wasn’t this. He tried his best to only stare at you because he really didn’t want to look at fucking James right now. “Yeah,” he cleared his throat, feeling uncomfortable all of a sudden, “it just…felt right. Thought I belonged here.” His voice was quiet because he wasn’t even sure if that was true anymore. Was this right? Did he belong here anymore?

You stood perfectly still, no emotion on your face, and he wished more than anything he could read your mind right then. James looked back and forth between the two of you before he lightly tapped your hip, making peter’s heart churn, “I think we should get going, we’re gonna be late.”

He watched you look up at him, dazed, “Oh right, yeah, we should go. Bye Peter,” you didn’t even look at him as you said it, turning around and leaning into James’ hold as you walked away.

Yeah, this definitely wasn’t how he expected this to go.

“You wanna talk about that?”

You scoffed. “Not really, no.”

“So he’s an ex,” James replied, and it wasn’t a question. You trudged forward, feeling an uncomfortable tightness in your chest. Almost two years. Almost a whole two years where you’d imagined countless scenarios of how your reunion would go, but you’d never imagined he’d ambush you on your college campus, claiming that he’d transferred, while you were walking around campus with your current boyfriend.

You inhaled deeply. “Yeah, and I have no clue what he’s doing here.” You’d never really told him about Peter, it just hadn’t come up. If you had to refer to him while sharing a story, it was always as an ‘old friend’ or ‘neighbor from across the hall’. You’d never liked calling him an ‘ex’.

“Well I do,” you looked up at him questioningly. “He transferred this semester, obviously.” You huffed out a laugh and tried to focus on your footsteps. Just keeping walking forward, you thought. God, not even a full 5 minutes together and it’s like he’s completely thrown you off.

“Where’d he go before?”

He didn’t know anything. You were so used to the people in your life being so involved with you and Peter, already knowing everything, knowing when and where to bring him up after the breakup (usually trying not to bring him up at all for your sake) and you guessed that’s why you’d never told James about him, it was nice to have someone who didn’t know everything there was to know about you and your past. This way, you’d get to unveil those things at your own pace.

“He went to Duke.”

James whistled. “Good school,” he admitted, and you nodded. It was a good school. It was a great school that was 8 hours 27 minutes and 36 seconds, which is how far away Peter was supposed to be. But he wasn’t. He was here, attending the same school you were, the same school he was originally supposed to attend. With you.

“He seems cool enough, maybe we’ll see him around.” You wanted to give James credit for how cool he was trying to be about this.

“Maybe,” you forced a smile. You wondered just how much you’d be seeing him around and just what that meant.

“Pete you have no right to be upset about this,” May said, shaking her head on the other side of the phone.

“Don’t you think I know that,” he groaned and clutched the phone tighter to his ear as he walked around campus. It had been a couple of days since your little interaction and it had been on his mind since it happened. He couldn’t stop thinking about you. “And I’m not upset! I’m just…surprised.”

“What were you expecting?” May asked.

“Not him, thats for damn sure,” he mumbled grumpily. Truthfully, James had never done anything to make Peter hate him, he might even be an okay guy, but that wasn’t for Peter to find out because he was dead set on hating his guts, valid reasoning or not.

“Pete he’s not that bad,” his aunt tried to reason. “He’s actually an okay guy, he’s sweet and—”

“She deserves more than okay! And what about—wait a minute…have you met him?”

The line was quiet for a moment, confirming his suspicions. Peter scoffed just as May said, “it’s not like that! He came over during winter break and I happened to run into him. I spent a few hours at their apartment and—I don’t have to explain myself to you! Look Peter,” May sighed and he could picture her rubbing her temple the way she usually did when he got a little too much for her sometimes, “you broke up with her, you stopped reaching out, and you were the one who chose not to see her during your winter break,” she scolded through the phone and Peter felt his whole body flush with shame and guilt. He had done those things and there was no denying it, but while he might’ve considered them the only options at the time, god did he regret all of it after seeing you with that guy.

“I know,” he admitted in a low voice, “I did fuck up, and we can talk about that later but I’ve gotta go for now, May, bye.”

“Bye, Pete,” she replied, “I love you.”

“Love you too,” he hung up and stared at the door in front of him. After your first meeting, he wasn’t sure if this was as good an idea he had built it up to be in his head.

Too late, he thought, and pushed open the door too the newsroom.

“Hey, Peter right?” A redhead approached him with a bright smile on her face.

“Yeah that’s me,” he shrugged his backpack higher onto his shoulder and held out a hand.

“Alyssa, I’m the editor,” she said as she accepted his handshake, “I cannot tell you what a jam you’ve gotten us out of, really we’ve never run this low on members. Usually, we’re fighting them off with a stick, but apparently there aren’t too many people into photography right about now.”

“Oh hey, no problem. I saw the notice in the newsletter,” he shrugged, “thought I’d try something new.”

“Well, I really appreciate that Peter, I saw the photos you sent me, they’re amazing. Honestly, if the ones you submit for the paper are half as good, we’re going to be perfect.”

“Thanks Alyssa,” he always appreciated when people spoke well about his photography. You were always his biggest fan when it came to his interests and hobbies. You knew everything about him, from big to small, and yet you never belittled any part. He wondered if you had any clue how much that had meant to him. In a world where people praised Spider-Man for being the strong willed hero he was while simultaneously berating Peter for…well everything, you did the opposite. You loved him, every part. From the boy who went out to fight crime almost every free hour he could get, to that same boy who would sit on your bedroom floor and do physics homework with you and was crazy good at it.

He felt a sudden nervous feeling overtake him at the thought of seeing you again in the newsroom. He knew you were on the paper, duh, but when he’d seen the notice that the news team was in need of an extra photographer to two this season, he’d thought it a good opportunity. It definitely didn’t have anything to do with you, or spending time with you. Of course not.

Alyssa walked him around, introduced him to some of the people there, the other photographers (only one, at present, his name was Ryan. Apparently there was a shortage of people willing to take photos for the paper this semester), and by the end of his mini tour he couldn’t deny the small amount of relief at not seeing you…and yet at the same time…disappointment. Maybe you just weren’t in today.

He spoke to soon.

Stopping back at the front of the room, Alyssa turned to him again, “Well, I think that’s most of the people, at least, who are in today. Y’know, it’s pretty slow for start of the semester—” Her eyes darted somewhere behind him, obviously distracted by something. Peter watched her face light up before she said, “Oh! Looks like I was wrong,” she beckoned someone to come closer. Peter could feel the vibe shift in the room. “Peter, this is Y/N!”

Peter turned and could see the exact moment you faltered. Clearly, Alyssa didn’t. Nor did she notice the not-so-subtle looks you were throwing her way. “Y/N this is Peter, he one of our new photographers.”

To make things even better, James chose right then to walk in. “And this is James!”

James came to stand right beside you, taking up a stance much similar to the one he had during their first meeting, except this time his arms draped over your shoulder and tugged you into him.

“Oh, we’ve met. Patrick, right?”

Peter definitely didn’t like this guy.

“Peter,” Alyssa corrected, “I was just introducing him to Y/N, he’s a part of the photography team.”

“Oh I don’t think they need much of an introduction.” James remarked. You winced. Peter wanted to punch him. Poor Alyssa was growing more confused by the second.

“So…have you two met as well?” She tried.

“Lyss do you remember when I told you about Peter from high school?” You trailed off at the end, hoping she’s catch it on her own.

Alyssa snorted, “You mean the dick who broke up with you on graduation? Yeah I remember—” she gasped and looked at Peter, then back at you.

You nodded. Alyssa couldn’t keep the shock off of her face. Finally, James spoke up, “And as lovely as this has been, we should really get to work.” Peter watched as he pulled you away to a pair of desks on the other side of the room. He watched you take a seat at one, James at the other, and he wondered if this was how you’d met him. Did you like him because he attractive? Funny? What about him had caught your attention in the first place? And then the worst thought of all, did you love him? Peter repressed a shudder, he couldn’t handle that right now, or maybe ever.

He turned back to Alyssa, who had been standing quietly beside him since her earlier remark about him (rightfully so, he had been a dick), “So where should I set up?” He lifted his backpack on his shoulder for emphasis.

Wordlessly and wide-eyed, Alyssa pointed to an empty desk. It was two desks across from yours.

This was going to be interesting.

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me your Peter was here! In Columbia! Joining the paper!”

It hadn’t taken your roommate long to find some (shitty) excuse to drag you out to the hall to give you the talking-off you were expecting. “I can go in there and fire him right now!” She was flexing her powers as the new editor.

Lyss had made abrupt climb to editor at the end of last semester. Brandon had resigned to take some time to himself while he applied to grad schools all over the country and went through the trials and tribulations that was senior year of undergrad and honestly, you couldn’t have thought of anyone better to take him place. You’d all gone out to celebrate, the whole news staff, but the two of you and James had had your own little celebration at your apartment later that night.

“I’m sorry! It’s just been so hectic! You’re so busy all the time, you’re barely home, and honestly I didn’t really believe it at first. And he’s not my Peter,” you scoffed, “he’s just Peter.”

Lyss snorted, “Y/N there’s no way you could possibly think I’m too busy to hear about all this, this is huge! Tell me everything!” She exclaimed eagerly. “When’d you first run into him? How did James know? Did you tell him? Oh my god, what did he say?”

“Calm down girl,” you held up both hands. “I ran into him a couple days ago, James was with me, and he was actually super cool about it!”

Lyss gave you a look. “What?” You asked confused.

“Now, what exactly had you thinking he was cool about it? ‘Cause that was not the vibe I was getting in there.”

“What do you mean?”

“Patrick? Please,” she giggled, “that was totally on purpose, of course he remembered his name. And the way he had his arm around you?”

You sighed and ran a hand through your hair, “This is all so crazy. I don’t know what hell he’s doing back here.”

Lyss perked up, “My offer to fire him still stands babe! Just say the word and poof,” she made a gesture with her hands, making you laugh.

“We both know can’t actually do that. We’re running low enough on photographers as it is, you can’t just fire a perfectly good one.”

“Maybe,” she shrugged, “I can always grab a camera and try my hardest. I always thought I’d be great at photography.”

You grinned, walking back towards the door to the newsroom, Lyss following beside you, “Oh yeah? How come?”

“I don’t know,” she frowned, “that was a total fucking lie, I’ve never thought twice about photography. But I probably could do it! If it came down to it.”

You laughed as you entered, but one of the other writers quickly interrupted it “Alyssa, we need your help with this layout.”

Lyss looked at you smiling, “Duty calls, this isn’t over.”

You smiled, “Go. We’ll talk later.”

As she walked off, you made your way to your desk, avoiding any eye contact with Peter. It was just your luck he got sat right across from you. You briefly wondered if Alyssa’s editor could get him moved. You’d have to bring this up with her later.

A file dropped on your desk, causing you to look up. James stood above you, smirking and successfully blocking your view of Peter (if you were trying to look over at him, which you weren’t). You wondered it he’d done that on purpose. “Those copies you were looking for,” he proclaimed, pointing towards the file, “fresh out the printer.

Shit. You had completely forgotten about these with everything and you needed them to finalize the current article you were working on. Smiling, you gushed jokingly, “My hero, thank you so much!”

James’ smirk grew as he placed his hands on his hips dramatically. “Just call me your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.”

You were about to laugh until you heard a scoff come from behind him. Your smile fell from your face and you watched James’ expression change as he turned to see Peter. “Something funny man?”

“No,” Peter replied, not even bothering to look up from his computer. That was until he let his eyes meet yours. It was barely a second, but it was long enough for James to notice.

James stood perfectly still in his spot in front of your desk before silently walking over to his and taking a seat without another look at either of you.

You tried to get him to look at you so you could silently apologize or something, but he wouldn’t budge.

You weren’t sure how this was going to work.

You swiped your hair out of your face as you walked out of the lecture hall, your shoes echoing on the hard-tile floor. Stepping out of the building, you took a deep breath. You’d had a long day and you couldn’t wait to get to your apartment and crash on the couch. You weren’t even sure if you could make it to your room. You’d try to get in a nap before you were supposed to meet up with James tonight. The two of you had been busier lately and you’d felt bad about everything going on with Peter, so you tried to set aside some time just for you and him. It was going to be a low-key night, just the two of you ordering in, maybe watching a movie, you thought it was much needed.

Your breath caught in your throat when you saw Peter leaning against the wall of the building adjacent to the one you just exited. The photography building. You hadn’t seen him recently. Even at the newsroom, it seemed the two of you had different schedules lately.

You kept your head down, hoping he wouldn’t notice you.

“Hey Ace! Wait up.”

Clearly, you wouldn’t be so lucky.

You paused, not even bothering to pretend like you hadn’t heard him. It was Peter, you knew him better than you knew yourself, he would’ve just chased after you.

You took in his appearance as he walked up to you. You hadn’t really given yourself the chance before, with James around and everything…Peter had changed. You could see it now clearer than ever. He moved with a confidence in himself and with his body he hadn’t possessed before. And he looked buffer.

Peter had told you how after the bite, everything had changed, his senses, his appearance, and while he had definitely been strong before…now there was visible muscle to back it up. You suspected than even if he tried to hide under baggy sweaters like he did back in high school, it wouldn’t work. But something told you that this new Peter was done hiding.

Gone was the scrawny little kid you’d known your entire childhood and before you stood a handsome young man who would’ve left that same little kid awestruck. “Been hitting up the gym?” You asked once he was close enough to hear.

Peter chuckled, “Yeah, actually. I started back in freshman year, it helped clear my mind off everything.”

How someone could possibly juggle classes, homework, super hero work, workouts, and manage to eat, sleep, and drink, you’d never know. But if anyone could do it it was Peter.

“May and I were talking.” Safe bet to start with May, you thought. “She was asking about you, said its been a while since she’s seen you.”

“Mhm,” you agreed, a little confused as to where he was going with this, “I haven’t been home in a bit, but we’ve texted.”

“Oh yeah, that’s nice!” Peter reached to scratch the back of his neck, a nervous tic of his you knew all too well. “If you wanted you, could come over for dinner with us sometime. She’d love to have you.”

“Umm…” was he serious right now? “Thanks Peter, but my schedule’s kinda packed right now. I’ve got like three essays due and I have a big article coming up soon, so I’ll have to pass. Tell May I miss her too though.”

“Oh, the competition, right? That’s coming up soon, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it is. You know about it?”

He shrugged one shoulder. “I think I heard Alyssa mention it and you having something to do with it. Congratulations, by the way, I heard it’s a pretty big deal.”

You grinned, “It is. Front page big deal. I’m excited.” You admitted.

Peter smiled, so genuine you could see those crinkles form beside his eyes. You remembered how you used to trace them with your fingers. “All your writing belongs on the front page, if you ask me.”

You blushed. He couldn’t just say things like that, not anymore. “Thanks, but you haven’t even read any of it yet.” You hadn’t had a piece published since he’d arrived here, he couldn’t have read any of your work yet.

“That’s not true,” he said simply, with no further elaboration.

Your phone rang, cutting off your conversation. Reaching into your pocket, you pulled it out to see James’ name flashing across your screen. You held up a finger to Peter and walked a few paces away before answering.

“Hey!”

“Hey babe, so listen, Nash just broke up with his girl and we thought we’d take him on a barhop to cheer him up. I’m picking you up at 10.”

Your brows furrowed. Barhopping did not sound like something you wanted to do tonight, or ever. And didn’t you already have plans? “Um, weren’t we supposed to hang out tonight?”

“Oh pfft, that wasn’t anything special, we were just going to order takeout. So 10?” Oh. You’d beg to differ, him and his friends always found an excuse to get absolutely plastered at least once a week, and the two of you had barely seen each other. At first you’d thought he was a little upset with you because of the whole Peter thing but now…you wondered if he even cared.

You cleared your throat, rubbing the palm of your empty hand on your shirt. When had you gotten sweaty? “No I think I’m good. I have some stuff to work on, but you have fun though! I’ll keep the door unlocked tonight.” It wouldn’t be the first time you’d nursed a drunk and incoherent James (and terribly hungover in the morning)

“Damn, you sure?”

You hummed in response.

“Kay, bye.”

“Bye.”

You shoved your phone back into your pocket. At least now you could take as long as you wanted with your nap.

“Is he always like that?”You jumped. You had completely forgotten Peter was still there, and now he was stepping closer to you, taking back the distance you’d put between you to answer your phone call.

“I’m sorry?”

“Your boyf—James, is he always like that? Partying, getting drunk, barhopping?” Right…Peter wasn’t just Peter. He was also Spider-Man, which meant he’d just heard everything. As if this day couldn’t get fucking better. You didn’t need your ex-boyfriend judging your current one, he had no right.

“No.” You frowned. “So what if he likes to party sometimes? Isn’t that what college is about?”

“I’m not attacking him Ace. I guess I was just wondering how the two of you got together when you’re so different. I mean, even to someone who doesn’t know you as well as I do, it doesn’t take me to figure out barhopping isn’t your scene.”

“Well maybe you don’t know me as well as you think you do,” you snapped back, “not anymore at least.”

Peter paused, a look of hurt flashing across his features, as if that were something he hadn’t even considered. A small part of you relished in it, in him knowing things had changed since the last time you’d seen each other, and he couldn’t just ignore that. No amount of pretending would fill in that gap.

“Goodbye Peter.” You didn’t want to talk about James with him anymore than you already had.

“The invitation still stands,” he blurted. You gave him a weird look. “To dinner,” he explained, “the invitation still stands. I meant what I said, May would love to have you over, and so would I. So if you’ve ever got the time…” he trailed off.

You couldn’t help the soft smile that graced your face. Only Peter could switch your moods so fast, and you had no doubt he meant it about the dinner, just like you had no doubt he would also completely understand if you ignored his offer altogether.

“Thank you Petey, I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Thank you Petey,”

God he’d bet you didn’t realize it, that the nickname had just rolled off your tongue. You probably hadn’t thought twice about, he, however, certainly had. In fact, the moment hadn’t left his mind. You’d given him a smile so sincere, he would’ve given you anything you asked for just to keep you looking at him like that. And paired with the nickname? He was done for.

He had sat outside the English building in hopes of finally getting to see you again. He was starting to believe he must be a masochist, because every time he saw you it felt like a punch to the gut. Was it possible for someone to get more beautiful by the second? But he couldn’t help it, he was drawn to you, always had been and always will be.

The worst of it was when you were with James. God, just thinking the name made his entire mood sour. But seeing the only girl he’d ever loved with someone else made him want to punch something (someone; and that someone was James). And hearing that phone call you’d had with him only further pissed him off. How the hell could he even think to ask you to go barhopping, if he knew you at all he would know that you would much rather prefer a quiet night at home. And it seemed that was exactly what you had planned, before that douchebag cancelled to go out with his friend.

He had been out patrolling most of the evening and well into the night. Now he was on his way home, it had been a quiet night so he thought he might as well retire early. He could always come back out if need be. That was one of the greater things about college, more freedom, a more flexible schedule, unlike high school.

Just as he was swinging his way back home, he caught sight of a familiar figure lounging on a fire escape. You were home. Peter hadn’t really spoken to you since he’d caught you walking of class. You’d see each other around, but there was nothing more than brief moments of eye contact.

You looked peaceful, reading silently as a soft light filtered through your window. He was going to change that.

He landed softly a couple stories above you. Flipping over, he shot out a web and caught himself so he was hanging upside down. Slowly, he lowered himself until he his head was almost brushing the floor of your fire escape. “How’s it hanging?”

You shrieked, dropping your book in fright. Now, Peter would never want to actually scare you, but he couldn’t help messing around every now and then.

“What the fuck Peter,” you hissed, one hand resting on your heart as you breathed heavily. Peter righted himself and landed completely in one smooth motion.

He swiped off his mask and grinned. “I thought it was funny.”

You whacked him with your book.

Peter threw his arms up and cowered slightly, “Mercy! Mercy!”

“Shut up!” You laughed softly, “Someone might hear you.”

He put arms down and fixed you with a serious expression, “Did you or did you not just scream a couple of seconds ago?”

You whacked him with your book again.

Peter was cackling like a madman at this point and it didn’t take long before you were joining him. The two of you stayed like that for a moment, laughing together on your fire escape, a place ripe with memories of your life together before.

“What’re you doing here?” You asked once you’d calmed down and caught your breath again.

“I was swinging back home when I saw you out here reading. Thought I’d stop by and say hey.”

“Or give me a heart attack,” you murmured.

He laughed again, “Sorry about that.”

“No you’re not,” you rolled your eyes but your smile escaped. “Hey.”

“Hey,” he replied, grinning. This was nice, so nice.

You fell into a soft silence, neither of you wanting to break the comfortable atmosphere you’d created. You decided to speak up, but so did he.

“I wanted to—”

“Ace I—”

You looked at him and held back a laugh. He shook his head softly and smiled. Settling down across from you, Peter stretched his legs out (longer than they were before, and taking up more space, he almost didn’t fit), and he pointed towards you, “You first.”

“Fine. I wanted to say sorry for snapping at you so much since you’ve been back. Its just been…” you fidgeted with your hands and bit your lip, “weird.”

His heart fell a little bit, why in the world would you be apologizing? “Ace, you don’t need to apologize for a thing, I’m the one who should be apologizing to you. I’m sorry Ace, I know its weird, I know you had no warning when I just popped back into your life, and I know it’s weird.” He nudged your leg with his and smiled, “Hell I’m lucky your even talking to me right now.”

You narrowed your eyes, “Well it’s not like you gave me much of a choice, you cornered me on my own fire escape!”

He laughed. “True, I guess.” Peter added a dramatic sigh before his next sentence, hoping to hide how nervous he actually felt, “I could always go if you want me to.”

“No,” you said softly, “I don’t mind.”

Peter felt like doing a happy dance.

“What’re you doing home?” He asked. He knew you had your own apartment near campus (with Alyssa, he’d learned. He quickly, learned how close you two were, he was glad you had a friend like that.) and he couldn’t think of a specific reason you’d be home.

“My mom bought some new furniture and she asked me to come help her put it together. I figured I’d just spend the night.”

“Oh? I thought she was banned from shopping?”

“She was! Until she wasn’t.” You laughed out loud, making Peter laugh as well.

The night went on like that, you and Peter sharing simple conversation. You avoided touching on the touchier subjects for now. You weren’t exactly ignoring them, both of you knew they were there, sitting beside you as you conversed, waiting to be picked apart and discussed at length. It just seemed that the two of you had silently reached an agreement, that for now, you’d enjoy whatever peace you’d found. Because at the end of the day, first and foremost, you two had been friends. The bigger things could come later.

It had been a week since that night on your fire escape wand you were actually starting to think you could handle Peter being back. Seeing him around had been brief lately, you suspected he was finally getting settled in his classes and his life here, but when you did see him it was easier. Less tension-filled. Unless James was around, that made it harder.

You were laying on the couch in your living room, Lyss laying opposite you, both your legs meeting in the middle. The two of you were watching Pride & Prejudice (the 2005 one, of course, because no one really cared about the 1995 series) while a bowl of popcorn lay half-eaten on the coffee table in front of you.

You reached out and grabbed a handful of popcorn, “Kiera Knightley is so fine.”

“Tell me about it, oh my god,” Lyss exclaimed, dramatically fanning herself. “I watched ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ when I was younger, I’ve never been the same since.”

“I know exactly what you mean. Peter and I watched them all together during one of our summer breaks, and that scene with her and Orlando Bloom had me practically drooling.” You giggled.

“Speaking of Peter,” the way she said it had you thinking she’d been dying to bring this subject up, “how’s that going?”

“Um…good. Well, better, I guess is the right word. Things are going better than the first few times I saw him around but of course there’s still that weirdness.”

“God, I still cant get over how crazy it is that he just randomly pops up here, outta nowhere!” You’d always talked about Peter with Lyss, you’d told her your history with him long before he’d shown up, but now she could finally put a face to the name.

“You’re telling me,” you snorted. “I saw him when I went back home last week,” you shook your head, “we talked on my fire escape like we used to. It was almost unreal.”

“Weren’t you guys no contact since winter break of freshman year?” She asked.

You hummed in confirmation and she whistled. “So he hasn’t given you some grand love proposal, has he?”

You choked on a laugh, “No. Of course not.”

“I’m just saying,” she shrugged casually, “you don’t transfer to the school you know your ex-girlfriend attends, join the paper you know she’s on, and hang out on her fire escape where you hung out when you were together unless you still have feelings.”

Frowning, you popped some more popcorn your mouth. You didn’t want to believe Peter still had feelings for you, it would make everything so much harder.of course, there was something there, and if you were being honest, there probably always would be. You were each other’s first loves and that didn’t just disappear into thin air.

But Peter had left you, and you had a boyfriend now. Everything else was irrelevant.

Lyss leaned over and poked your cheek, “Don’t pout, I was only kidding. Sorta.”

“I know,” you said, shooting her a smile.

“Stop thinking about him and start think about the killer article you’re going to write me about tomorrow.” She shot you a wink.

Right. The competition was tomorrow. And you were going with James.

“OH! Hand clench scene!” Lyss jumped up, tearing you away from your thoughts.

Peter had left you, and you had a boyfriend now. Everything else was irrelevant.

Tomorrow should make a great distraction.

The venue was beautiful. You made your way around, stopping to appreciate every photograph, taking in all the details of the art hanging on every inch of the walls. You loved it.

You looked up at James and grinned, “Do you get it now?”

He smiled and shook his head, “To be honest with you, nah.” He smirked at you, “But I’m here with the prettiest girl in the whole school, so what does it matter?”

You flushed and looked down at the empty notepad in your hands, by the end of the night it was probably going to be full. You were going to walk around taking notes of all the unique pieces, but the biggest part of your job today would be later, when they announce the winners. There were three runner ups and then, of course, the first place winner. You’d be speaking to all of them tonight, longer with the winner.

Just as you’d told James, this thing had a dress code. He had gone for a navy jacket with a white button down underneath, and a pair of white slacks. You were wearing a pretty black dress that fell to just below your knees; it had a soft tulle layer that swished as you walked and floral embroidery that ran along the whole thing, the green of the vines and soft pink of the flowers popping out with the darker undertone. You felt good about tonight, really good. Alyssa had chosen to give you this big piece of news and you weren’t going to let her down.

You walked around the venue hand-in-hand with James, getting familiar with the art and the artists, stopping by to compliment a few that really popped out to you. Your favorite so far was a stunning picture taken by a girl named Macy, she’d captured of Bow Bridge at Central Park. She’d used some kind of vintage camera giving the photo an ethereal, elegant, romantic feel to it, with the flowers on the bushes, the green of the scenery, and the golden glow on the bridge and the people walking upon it and boating on the waters beneath it, if it was up to you this would definitely be picked as first place.

You’d tried to get James to see the same beauty you saw in the picture, the almost fantastical vibe of it, looking more like a painting than reality, but he hadn’t understood, claiming it was ‘just a picture of the park’ leaving you more than a little disappointed. Maybe some people really just didn’t understand art.

“Think we’ve seen almost everything,” you murmured to James as you looked around to see if there was a place you hadn’t been yet.

“Actually, there’s a few on the other side of that wall we haven’t seen yet,” he pointed, “been seeing lots of people come in and out of there. I think one of the winners might be there.”

“Oh my gosh I completely missed that part, thanks!” You leaned up and pecked his cheek, making him grin. “Anytime babe.”

That would be your last happy moment of the night.

You walked through the photos slowly and marveled at how, when it came to art, everyone truly had their own style. Each piece had a tag beside it, conveying the name of the work and the name of the photographer. Though most of the presenters liked to hover near their piece in case anyone had questions or wanted to know more, it was easier this way for the judges to get the information they needed.

You were talking to someone about their picture when James nudged you. “Is that Peter?”

He pointed to your left, and you saw the side-profile of Peter talking to someone with his arms crossed. Peter was here? Well, it did make sense, he was a photographer after all. This was more than his scene.

“He’s probably here to get pictures for the paper,” you shrugged.

James held your hand a little tighter as the two of you walked through some more photos. “Alright, this is getting boring,” James sighed heavily.

“Really?” you frowned, “I really like it. I think its fun.”

He eyed you, “You already got the article babe, you don’t have to put on an act anymore.”

You laughed lightly, but you weren’t really finding this funny, “I’m not acting! Did you see ‘love in the air’? I don’t think I’ve ever seen something more beautiful.” That was the name of the piece you’d loved, and you had to say, it was accurate. It was like looking through rose-tinted-glasses, finding the lovely in everything.

“The one of the park?” James rolled his eyes, “it’s Central Park, there’s nothing special about it.” You were opening your mouth to argue when he cut you off, “They’re just photos, babe. Now, when are they gonna announce the winners so we can get outta here?”

You frowned and looked down at your watch. There was only about half an hour until winners were announced. You were going to write down something in your notepad when you heard James mutter a curse under his breath and come to a stop beside you, his hand going limp in yours.

“What? What is it—” you looked up to see what had gotten him and you really wished you hadn’t. In front of you hung a piece you hadn’t seen before, this particular photograph, or photographs as it was more of a collage, had something none of the other ones didn’t…you.

“Who…?” But it was no use because you knew who, and so did James.

Neither of you needed to look at the tag to know who the contestant was, but you did anyway.

‘Seasonal’

By: Peter Parker

It was a bright, colorful, collage conveying the changes of the seasons. One corner had bounds of snowflakes and different clips of snowy fields and icicles, stretching out to merge with the corner opposite of it, summer. Bright blue waves, soft tufts of sand. Both corner melted down the sides of the poster board to create spring, which was full of beautiful, soft colored flowers, sprouting up as if just given life. The project was beautiful, you had to admit. You’d known Peter had a knack for photography but all these photos, the dedication to this project, was extremely admirable. There had to be hundreds of photos, cut up, some bigger than others, and perfectly arranged with each other to create this harmonic view of nature, all taken by him,

But the problem was the center. Autumn. Which was you. It took up the middle body of the collage, it was dead center. Unlike the other seasons, this one didn’t have multiple photos bringing it together, it was the key piece, all the others worked to make this one shine.

That picture Peter had taken of you in Central Park, the one where he’d gotten you to lay on a pile of leaves, made you laugh so he could capture the perfect shot. You’d forgotten about it, honestly, you weren’t even sure if you’d seen it after it was taken. But now, here it was, over two years later, submitted in a fucking photography competition.

“What do you think?” You weren’t sure how long you were there, staring at that photo of yourself, it could’ve been hours, days even, before that heart-wrenchingly familiar voice.

You turned around quickly, coming face to face with Peter, who was looking at you with a heavy expression. You had seen him earlier when James pointed him out, but it was from across a crowded room and you’d only seen his side. He towered over you now, in a black button down, with black slacks and a black belt. You knew you shouldn’t even be thinking it, but he looked good. His shirt fit him perfectly, hugging him in all the right places, and he had his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, showing off his thick forearms. It wasn’t until he crossed them over his chest and looked at you expectantly that you realized you were staring and he was waiting on an answer.

Before you could give it to him, James spoke up, “You’ve got a lot of fucking nerve.” His voice was low and angrier than you’d ever heard it, causing alarm bells to go off in your head. Peter didn’t bother even acknowledging him, his eyes were solely on you, and that seemed to piss him off even more.

“You think this shit’s funny?” James growled.

“I wasn’t talking to you.” Peter rolled his eyes.

You stood shell-shocked in your place, unsure of what to do. “That’s it,” James said, “I’ve had enough of your bullshit.” He stepped forward suddenly, making you jump into action.

“Stop it,” you hissed, but he wasn’t listening, walking from your side right up to Peter.

His previous remarks had gained the attention from the small groups of people who were close enough to hear them.

“Take it down,” he said as he got up in Peter’s face. Peter, to his credit, didn’t budge an inch. In fact, he was looking at James as if he were nothing more than an annoying fly buzzing past. James stood at least a couple inches taller than Peter, and yet he wasn’t the most intimidating one here, not by a mile.

“No, but I’d be happy to take you down,” with a damn smile on his face. You wanted to slap them both.

“You little—”

“Enough!” You stepped in, throwing your arm between them and holding it against James’ chest. You weren’t going to sit there and let them throw hands at an event like this, especially not over you.

Peter sucked in a breath, eyeing the arm you had strapped across James’ front in a feeble attempt to hold him back. Something unreadable shone in his eyes, and his jaw ticked as he met your glare.

“You are not doing this here,” you said in a hard voice, refusing to look at Peter anymore and instead staring up at James. His face was stone and his eyes were set on Peter, whose eyes were set on you.

It was like some crazy triangle or something.

A part of you wondered what a photo of this particular moment would look like. You imagined it would be named something like ‘Lovers Quarrel’. Finally, after what felt like forever, James’ gaze finally slid down toward you. He worked his jaw for a moment before stepping back. “I need to get some air,” he mumbled. Without bothering another glance at either of you, he turned and headed for the exit.

You stood in place, eyes stuck on his retreating figure, when you heard Peter scoff. “Can you believe that guy?”

Rage flew through your blood. “Excuse me?”

“Oh come on Ace,” but his voice didn’t sound as sure as before and you could’ve laughed at the thought of him thinking you’d agree with him, “you know I didn’t start that.”

It was your turn to scoff, “Maybe not, but you didn’t hesitate to tell him how you’d take him down.”

“Well what was I supposed to do?” He asked weakly. All that confidence and haughtiness from earlier was gone, standing before you was just Peter. But you were starting to think you didn’t know Peter anymore. What you’d said to him before, about him not knowing you anymore, you’d said mostly to hurt him. But now…you wondered if there were more truth to your words than you realized.

Sometimes there were moments like that night on your fire escape and it was like things had never changed, he’d never moved hundreds of miles away and the two of you were back just hanging out, the oldest of friends. Two people who knew each other better than anyone else ever would.

And then there were moments like tonight.

You eyed him curiously, disappointment all over your features. You knew he hadn’t liked James but for him to genuinely partake in a fight…

“I don’t know Peter. I don’t know you anymore.” And you turned to walk in the same direction you’d seen James headed to before, but not before you glimpsed the hurt on Peter’s face.

Stepping out the doors, you were hit with a warm breeze and the sound of New York traffic. Shuddering at the sudden change of temperature (the venue had the AC on blast, stepping outside felt like a warm hug) you looked around for James. You caught him leaning against the side of the building with a hand running through his hair.

“Hey,” you said softly, approaching on light feet as you moved to the same wall, leaning right across from him.

“Hey,” he deadpanned, not meeting your eyes.

Your heart swelled with guilt. You didn’t know why; you knew you shouldn’t feel guilty, you didn’t do anything wrong and you had no clue Peter was going to do that, or be here at all. But he just looked so angry right now and you couldn’t help feeling like it was sort of your fault.

“I’m sorry.” You wanted something, anything. Anything other than that cold look in his eyes. You wanted him to tell you it wasn’t your fault, that he wasn’t angry, not at you, just at the situation.

He didn’t do any of that.

After a few seconds and still no answer you raised a hand to brush away the pieces of hair that had fallen into his face in a way you thought would comfort him, but that only had him swerving to avoid your touch as if your hand were made of fire.

You retracted it, your heart swelling with hurt. Ouch. Okay, so maybe he was mad at you. “James…” you trailed off. You weren’t sure what to say, you were afraid the slightest thing would set him off even more.

He shook his head, jaw so clenched you were afraid it would snap. “No,” he ran a hand over his face, “Nah, I can’t do this.”

“Do what?” You asked exasperated, “I don’t understand, what’s the big deal?”

“What’s the big deal?” He sneered with venom in his voice, and you regretted saying anything at all. “The big deal is—” he cut himself off with a harsh laugh, “Honestly Y/N, if you don’t see it you’re even more blind than I thought.”

Just then, a noise sounded from inside the venue. Microphone feedback. The awards were about to be handed out. You could hear one of the judges introducing himself. You stared at James wordlessly. You didn’t want to go inside and leave things like this but you also didn’t see how you could say or do anything that would fix it.

“James, I swear I had no idea about that,” you cleared your throat, willing your voice not to break, “I didn’t even know he’d be here.”

He wouldn’t even look at you, nodding and staring out onto the street, and that felt like an even bigger hurt. Why wouldn’t he just listen? As if he’d willed it with his eyes, a car pulled up to the curb right in front of you, tearing your gaze away from him for a moment. James walked away from you, hand settling on the handle of the backseat door and realization hit you hard, cold, and fast.

He hadn’t been waiting for you to follow him, to talk things out and make things right again. He’d just been waiting for his ride.

Without even bothering another look your way, “Good luck with your fucking article.”

I don’t know you anymore.

It was the only thing that had been running through his brain since the last syllable had rolled off of your tongue.

How could you say that? How could you even think it? Did you seriously believe that? Did you truly think that he was so different from the boy you once loved, the boy you’d dreamed of a future with, a shared future?

His head was buzzing with thoughts about you and what you’d said when he felt hands on his shoulders pushing him. Looking around, he realized everyone was staring at him. The hands on his shoulders were pushing him forward.

“Go, Peter,” someone beside him whispered, one of the other photographers from the paper, Ryan, who’d been standing beside him in the crowd, he realized, “you won!”

Right. He’d been so focused on you that he’d completely forgotten where he was for a moment. Shortly after you’d walked away from him, the award ceremony had begun. He didn’t even remember walking over here, or the introductions, or any other people being awarded

He wordlessly made his way onto the stage, vaguely recalled shaking someone’s hand, being handed something, a ribbon maybe? He didn’t know, he didn’t know anything except he was on stage, everyone was clapping for him, and he was looking for you.

The closest thing he could find was the photograph of you, also on the stage, sitting in the first place slot beside him. This was wrong, it was all wrong, and it was his fault. You were so excited for this article, you’d told him as much and he could see it, and he’d never wanted to ruin it for you.

To his side stood a petite blond girl, looking to be around his age, hovering close to another photograph. It was a lovely, romantic photo of Central Park. He recalled seeing it earlier as he was roaming around the venue checking out the other pieces. It had caught his attention because it reminded him of you.

It made his heart deflate even more.

More chatter ensued, followed by more applause and Peter tried his best not to look so uncomfortable (May had repeatedly informed him he always looked like he was about to be sick when he was too stressed, and he didn’t want anyone thinking he was about to vomit all over his newly awarded first-prize-winning piece and all the other winners).

At this point, he couldn’t wait for his cue to get off this godforsaken stage so he could find you and apologize. It was the least he could do but hopefully it would make things at least a little better.

“What do you say Mr. Parker?”

He whipped his head toward the speaker. Todd Kravinski, the man running this whole thing, the same one who’d called him up here earlier and handed him the ribbon (and a check, apparently, but Peter hadn’t realized that until after) had asked him something and he’d completely missed it.

“I—I’m sorry sir, what was that?”

Mr. Kravinski chuckled, and Peter let out a forced laugh. “C’mere kid, they’re gonna wanna get your picture, and maybe a little statement for the paper.” His stomach lurched at that last part. You were going to be taking his statement for the paper. You were going to be the one who described his piece and take the pictures he taken and turn them into words. Selfishly, he couldn’t wait to hear what you thought.

Peter walked instructed to stand near his piece, hold up his ribbon and check, and smile. He was paraded around, forced into handshakes, shoving out smiles until the corners of his mouth and his cheeks ached, and patted on the back more times than he could count. And yet all he could think about was you.

It wasn’t until the parading around was coming to an end that he looked up from some stranger congratulating him and caught your eye, standing a few steps back, talking to Lewis, he was third runner-up and they’d been standing beside each other earlier on the stage. Peter swore his whole body froze when he saw you, every time he caught your eye it felt like the two of you were sharing a whole conversation no one else was privy to, even now after being gone for almost 2 whole years, he could feel that familiar warmth, the sensual tug of that bond the two of you would only ever share with each other. And it was so familiar, so soft, so wholly you and him, he could’ve cried.

But then you looked away. And he could’ve cried for completely different reasons.

He made quick work of excusing himself from his current conversation and walked over to where you were chatting up Lewis, writing down things in a small notepad. He found you so incredibly adorable standing there, biting your lip in concentration as you scribbled down something she’d just told you, careful not to miss any details.

“Hey Lewis,” he approached the two of you, your head shooting up at the familiar voice, “Congrats on runner-up, your piece was amazing.”

They shook hands with each other, “You too man, congrats. That was one hell of a collage.”

“Thanks, hey do you mind if I steal Y/N away for a bit? I’ve been meaning to speak with her.”

“Not at all, I think we’re pretty much done here.” Lewis looked at you to confirm you’d gotten all you need. Peter could tell you very much wanted to protest and he caught your subtle glance down at your notepad. It didn’t take a genius to know you were pondering what other questions you might’ve missed that could keep you from being alone with Peter, but it seemed you couldn’t find anything because you ended up giving Lewis a tight-lipped smile.

“Thanks for talking with me. I loved your photo, and congratulations again.”

“Thank you. can’t wait to read it,” Lewis replied, walking off with a wink in your direction.

You immediately looked down, refusing to meet Peter’s eyes after Lewis turned his back, instead taking a enormous interest in your shoes.

Peter cleared his throat, “Ace, can we talk?”

“Talk about what?” You finally looked up. Peter was fluent in all things Y/N, yet he knew that he didn’t need to be to see the unhappiness etched on your features. Your countenance was all hard lines and and furrowed brows and—were your eyes red? Had you been crying?

“Seriously Peter, what do you wanna talk about? The part where you entered into a competition you knew damn well I’d be covering, the part where you entered and won using a picture of me without telling me, the part where you tried to pick a fight with my boyfriend about it, or the part where you tried to get me to side with you?”

“Ace, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for things to go down the way they did,” he tried helplessly. He didn’t want to argue with you, mostly because he’d never cared for it, even when you were together, but also because he didn’t want to feel any worse.

You sniffled and it felt like a kick to the gut. His thought from earlier resurfaced, and this time it was because he was completely fluent in you that he knew you hadn’t cried yet. Between whatever had happened when you’d left to find James and now, you’d gotten upset but you hadn’t cried and it was breaking him to see you trying so hard to keep that composure.

“Well they did,” you replied quietly, avoiding his gaze once more as you crossed your arms and looked to the side.

All Peter really wanted to do was pry your arms open, break the protective stance you’d taken up, and pull you into a bone-crushing hug that was much need by the both of you if you asked him. But he couldn’t do that. “I’m so sorry Ace. Is there anything I can do to help?”

“You’ve done enough.” He wasn’t really expecting you to accept his offer, but the rejection still hurt.

“Well, what about with the article? How can I help with that?” He hadn’t let himself think it but he was excited about the extra time with you that came with first place. Maybe there was a silver lining in all this.

“Thanks but no.” Maybe not. “Actually, I—I should go.”

He wanted to speak up. He wanted to protest. He wanted you. But he couldn’t, he couldn’t have any of the things he wanted and the same thought kept floating through his head:

It’s all my fault.

The leaves rustled around you as you walked, the breeze carried with it a certain smell you could only find on the streets of New York during this time of year. You were on the brink of summer, the nature around you was peaking. The flowers were fully bloomed, the grass a delicious shade of green, birds chirped merrily, and you felt like shit.

You and James hadn’t talked since he’d left last night after the whole thing with Peter. You’d sent texts, called multiple times, left voicemails most of those times, you weren’t quite sure what else there was to do. You should probably go to his place. Maybe you should’ve even gone last night, but…you weren’t up for it yet. Not then and not now.

And then there was Peter.

Stupid, annoying, confusing, infuriating, Peter Parker.

Leaving last night was a stupid idea. You were already there, you should’ve asked him a few quick questions and got it over with. Now you’d have to make time to see him, and you weren’t sure how that would go over with James, article or not.

It had felt like your heart had short-circuited when you’d seen that photo on the wall. How long had he planned that? Obviously he was aware you were going to see it…what had he thought your reaction would be? What had he thought James’ reaction would be? He probably hadn’t thought of James at all, if you were being honest with yourself.

It still felt crazy to think he was back in the city. You’d seen the news reports of Spider-Man once again in New York. The first one had popped up the same day you’d ran into him. You caught yourself thinking about him often as you walked around campus, knowing he was there somewhere as well, walking those same grounds (or swinging maybe). It was weird. It was weird working with him on the paper and yet…there was something when you were with Peter, something you hadn’t felt in almost 2 years. Something a part of you knew, deep down, that you would never feel with anyone else.

“Funny seeing you here.” You’d know that voice absolutely anywhere. It was how you’d first discovered him as Spider-Man, after all.

You turned, coming face-to-face with Peter. He was in a dark grey t-shirt that fit him like a glove, dark washed jeans, and a beat up pair of converse he’d had since you’d known him. He looked every bit the boy you once knew, only less boy and more man now. That was another change you hadn’t gotten used to.

“Is it?” You asked, because something in his tone told you he’d expected to find you here.

“No,” he shook his head, “I remembered you always came for walks here when you were having a rough time and after everything that happened last night…lucky guess.”

Stupid, annoying, confusing, infuriating, Peter Parker.

Of course, he knew where to find you. “You always were a genius.” You said as you continued to walk slowly, Peter picking up pace to stride beside you.

“Doesn’t take a genius to figure that out, to figure you out. I know you Ace, no matter what, I’ll always know you.”

James doesn’t know you, he never would’ve known where to find you and you weren’t even sure he’d bother looking—

No, you had to stop that. Comparing the two of them wasn’t going to get you anywhere except all stuck in your head. Peter wasn’t yours, not anymore, no matter how well he knew you. He’d made sure of that.

“Well did you want something?” You weren’t exactly being pleasant, but you also couldn’t bring yourself to care. You couldn’t believe you’d apologized to him for being ‘snappy’ because right now all you could think was how much he deserved it.

He stopped his walking and grabbed your elbow, stopping you as well, “I know I was a dick last night, hell, I know I’ve been a dick to you far before last night, but I wanna make it up to you if you’ll let me. I care about you Ace. I always will.”

You didn’t care about me when you ghosted me, you didn’t care about me when you stood me up on winter break, you didn’t care about me when you left me and moved all the way to North Carolina—

That wasn’t going to do anything but make you miserable, and even more snappy. You sucked in a deep breath. He was here. Might as well get what you needed from him, right?

“I’m gonna need to ask you a few questions, y’know, just basic stuff. For the article.”

Peter grinned as if that was exactly what he was hoping you’d say. “Yeah, yeah sure. Of course, anything.”

You had to bite the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing. He was so ready and willing to give you everything you asked for, you were sure if you demanded he hand you his wallet, he wouldn’t object.

You pulled out your notepad and pen from your tote bag, extremely grateful you always kept them on hand. Flipping open to a new page, you clicked your pen, flipped your hair over your shoulder, and cleared your throat, “Social security number, date of birth, and the last thing you ate in full detail?”

Peter choked out a laugh, “Um, okay. I don’t have it memorized, August 10th 2001, and a medium toasted bagel with extra cream cheese, no seasoning.”

“No seasoning?” You asked, scrunching up your nose in disgust. “What, so you just like plain, boring bagels like an old man?”

“Hey,” he jumped to his own defense, “no hating on plain bagels! They’re like the vanilla ice cream of the bagel world, classic. You can never go wrong with a plain bagel. It can never be too much, it can never be too little. It’s just right.”

You snorted, “Alright, keep it in your pants Parker, I think I’ve heard enough. Plain bagels rock.”

“Damn right they do,” he deadpanned.

Chuckling, you remembered something. “Oh my god, are you talking about the bagels from the little cafe next to the library?”

“Yeah! You know it?”

“Know it? Oh my god I practically moved in there during finals week. Have you tried their muffins? You would love them. I know you always hated when muffins are baked too dry because—”

“It’s like eating sand.” You both said in unison. You stared up at him, but he was already looking at you. He had this look in his eyes that was so wholly Peter, you almost couldn’t stand it. It took everything in you but you broke eye contact, clearing your throat before you continued speaking, “So um—tell about your photograph. What was the inspiration behind it? Why did you choose that piece?”

“Photography is often about telling a story, or at least part of it, and this piece…it means a lot to me.” You held your breath as he spoke. “I love the feeling of the picture, or rather, pictures. My piece tells a story about nature. I tried to show the beauty in all aspects of it, and while doing that, I tried to tell a story of my own.”

You tried your hardest not too think to hard about what he was saying. Which was hard considering you were literally the fucking center of this piece he was speaking of. “Your piece was a very well laid-out collage, how long did it take you to put it together?”

“Um,” he scratched the back of his neck, a gesture so familiar it felt like your heart was crying, “well I joined pretty last minute, so about a week, but I was cramming the whole time.”

You went quiet for a few minutes before coming up with your next question. “Was that your first choice? The piece I mean.” It wasn’t really relevant to the article but…you were curious.

“I was going to do something with constellations,” he admitted.

Oh. Thank god he didn’t. You might’ve lost your mind.

“But those are harder to catch on camera, and I entered last minute,” he finished. “Plus,” he added, looking up at the clear blue morning sky, “my favorites are mostly visible during autumn.”

You felt like your heart was going to stop. So much history, so many unspoken things between the two of you. A part of you swore you could feel the tension wrapping itself around you and tightening, making it harder and harder to breathe the more time you spent with him.

You don’t know how long the two of you walked in silence before he finally spoke up again, his voice hoarser than it was a few moments ago. “I thought of you every night you know.” You didn’t need to ask to know what he was talking about. “You could see them more clearly over there, the stars, and I thought of you every time. Not just because of the stars but…they were just a bigger reminder.”

“Peter—”

“You never did tell me what you thought of it. The collage.”

You paused. You weren’t sure what you thought of it. Objectively it was a great piece, beautiful, maybe one of his best works. It had won first place for a reason. But how the hell were you supposed to be objective about any of this? “I—I think it was well-deserving of its award.”

He let out a small chuckle, “Seriously Ace? Save that kinda talk for the article, tell me the truth.”

You paused, trying to figure out the right words. Taking in a deep breath, you said, “It was beautiful Pete, even if it was a little weird just seeing myself like that. I think it might be one of the most creative and beautiful things you’ve created. I understand what you mean,” gentler now, “about the feelings and the story and everything…I think you portrayed that really well.”

It went quiet between the two of you again and you wondered if you shouldn’t have said that. You were about to make up another question but he beat you to it, “I kept trying to convince myself that I wasn’t coming back here for you, that I didn’t have any expectations for us and that this whole transfer was completely irrelevant to how we ended things but that isn’t true. And I always knew it deep down, but I hit me like a bag of bricks when I saw you again.”

This couldn’t be real. He couldn’t be really saying all this, you had to be dreaming. You had a boyfriend, Peter broke up with you, he didn’t want you any more. Right? He couldn’t just come here after not talking to you for over a year and claim he transferred schools because of you. It wasn’t fair. He didn’t get to just dump all that on you.

“You were doing fine over there Peter, I heard everything. You had amazing grades, you were winning awards. You basically owned that school. So why’d you come back?”

“Okay, well you’re kinda over exaggerating. It wasn’t that great.”

You crossed your arms and narrowed your eyes, “Don’t give me that bullshit, yeah it was. It was everything you were wishing it would be.”

“No it wasn’t!” He burst out, hands running through his hair. “I tried to enjoy it Ace, I really did. But I couldn’t.” He looked at you with a pained expression. “I should’ve been having the time of my life, because yeah, in theory, it was everything I could’ve wished for. But I couldn’t enjoy a goddamn thing knowing you were over here, living a whole life I wasn’t a part of. Being away from you killed me Ace, everything I said to you on graduation? That shit ripped my fucking heart out. I didn’t want it anymore than you did.”

Tears collected in his waterline and you felt a lump in your throat. Were you finally getting the explanation you’d dreamed and hoped for over and over? Why did you feel so nauseous? “I probably wanted it less, if I’m being honest,” he laughed, but there was no humor in it. “I hated it over there Ace, not a second went by where you weren’t on my mind, not a night went by where you weren’t in my dreams. I know this is probably the dumbest thing you’ve ever heard but you need to believe me, I thought I was doing what was right that day on graduation. I really, truly thought that you would be happier if I did that. Not at first maybe, but eventually.” His voice got quieter and he sounded so raw, so emotional, you almost burst into sobs, “And that’s all I’ve ever wanted, I just want you to be happy Y/N.”

You swore you felt your heart split in half. Peter never called you by your name. Not since that night on your fire escape when you’d patched him up after a rough night of being Spider-Man and he first bestowed upon you his personal title, claiming that it ‘just suited you’.

You froze. You couldn’t exactly pinpoint what you were feeling, but it was a lot. “I—I have,” you cleared your throat to keep your voice from breaking, “I’m sorry, but I have to go.”

“Ace, wait, please.”

But you didn’t. This time, you were the one who ran away.

‘seasonal’ taglist: @keira-kaz2y5 @imafangirlofeverything @lov3vivian

@starsformiles @rkivesfilm

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oatmealzz · 1 month

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Firstly so sorry for the graphic image. I found this on the Danganronpa reddit. Also MAJOR DANGANRONPA V3 SPOILERS.

I feel like this very crudely drawn image of Kokichi’s dead crushed up corpse is the last piece I needed to fully accept his death.

Not being able to see the state of the body during the investigation, created a barrier for me to fully understand Kokichi’s exit out of the main story. It just felt like he “left” rather than died.

Additionally, none of the characters saw the dead body and that definitely had an impact on their attitude towards him. His death was brushed off because they also never got to see his dead body. Maki didn’t investigate the body and such. There was no opportunity to be traumatized but ample to refuel their hatred towards him. Remember when Nagito’s body was found? The characters wouldn’t stop talking about the stab wound and the spear. The graphic depictions of Nagito stabbing himself added to the nightmare fuel situation. Like SOMEONE did that to his body vibe. In this trial, that wasn’t discussed in a manner that resembled 2-5. Not being able to see the graphic nature of a body being crushed flat means the characters can avoid it. Again, put yourself in the situation you felt when you initially saw Kokichi’s death. Seeing his crushed body would absolutely impact your experience because it’s like DANG, WHO DID THIS?! Did he really deserve a death like that? And so on.

This is why his absence during the class trial wasn’t discussed to its extent such as with other characters. Imagine seeing the body and then going to the trial where the exisal was talking in his voice. It would be SUPER weird. LIKE I SAW HIS CRUSHED BONES AND ORGANS OUT ON THAT PRESS AND NOW IM HEARING HIS VOICE? I know for some people, not seeing the body meant that maybe both Kaito and Kokichi were alive and that they used another body to substitute a killing. After Monokuma revealed that it wasn’t possible to do so, I don’t remember anyone who acknowledged the body afterwards due to how the trial was going.

I’m no Kokichi Stan but I did warm up to his character pre-chapter 4. I always felt that his death and trial were lackluster and lacked needed impact. Personally, I thought the trial wasn’t very good but seeing a depiction of the body has changed my opinion on the trial.

Kaito also never saw Kokichi afterwards because he never lifted the press after it crushed him. Kaito doesn’t really have to carry the weight of the plan and his actions, because he never gets to see the honest result of them. Therefore, he was able to focus on the plan to foul Monokuma and stick to the script that a dead boy wrote. Personally, my entire view on Kaito would drastically change more if we both saw the state of the body. Like learning that Kaito killed Kokichi in the most violent way possible. This is no stab to the neck or strangulation where a character might crack a joke (throwback to Ryoma, Miu and even Nagito). I remember thinking that their plan failed because the gang ended up figuring out their scheme and there is a viewpoint that Kokichi’s plan failed. If it did, he died for nothing and in the most violently unnecessarily way possible too.

Danganronpa V3 had many victims where the remaining cast had a short mourning period for (Rantaro, Ryoma and Miu). Each student had different circumstances where the cast couldn’t comment too much on their dead peers. Rantaro distanced himself from others, and no one was particular close to Ryoma or Miu.

However, Kokichi was one where almost no one mourned his death.

It’s interesting for sure. I think more people mourned the losses of the culprits more than the victims.

Anyways - I recommend reviewing 3-5 again and seeing this image somewhere during the investigation. I promise, my opinion on 3-5 drastically improved afterwards.

#danganronpa v3 #danganronpa plot hole #danganronpa #danganronpa killing harmony #kokichi headcanons #kokichi ouma #rantaro amami #drv3 killing harmony #drv3 miu #miu iruma #ryoma hoshi #danganronpa execution #danganronpa art #content warning #monokuma

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fairydustblossom · 1 year

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losing control {part 4}

azriel x reader

summary: you and azriel have been best friends for decades. giving romance a chance takes some time to figure out.

category: angst, slow-burn, friends-to-lovers (kinda)

word count: 3.5k

warnings: none i think

Notes: i cannot believe it took me a month to finish this up. i apologize for the wait and i thank you all for being so patient! life got super busy for a second there and also i just was not liking this chapter at alllll. but i finally do! it's a good set up for the next few parts which im so EXCITEDDD to write!!! as always /please/ let me know y'alls thoughts i love hearing them,,,, anyways enjoy :)

{part 1} | {part 2} | {part 3} | {part 5}

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Half the night you tossed and turned filled with longing and regret and the other half you felt your anger reignite. The back and forth of your emotions leaving you rattled and unsure of what to do next.

When morning came, you felt like shit. Dark bags under your eyes, face a greyish color, eyes bloodshot red and hair a mess. You stared at yourself in the mirror feeling the weight of the day ahead. You had to go to training and more than likely see Azriel, you knew he wouldn’t skip it, after that you had a meeting with Rhys, and then you had to work all day at the library. A sigh left you as you thought of the long day ahead and all the responsibilities you had when all you wanted was to curl up in bed and sleep the day away. The thought of you and Azriel ending made you want to drop to your knees. If the possibility of that made you want to weep, you couldn’t imagine what seeing him today would do to you.

Closing your eyes you managed to quiet all your thoughts and started breathing in and out, telling yourself that Azriel hadn’t broken up with you last night. This was just a disagreement and everything would work itself out… You repeated this to yourself until you finally felt determination settle over you. Determination to work this out, to not let it consume you, and especially to not let Azriel see how much he had affected you. If he was going to act the way he did last night, cold and distant, then you would act the same.

So with one last look at yourself in this state, you turned around and started getting ready for the day.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Every bone in your body begged you not to go to training. Your body was sore, thanks to Azriel, and the sleepless night did little to soothe your body. But you wouldn't give Cassian any reason to hold skipping for a second time this week against you, and most importantly, you wouldn't let Azriel get in the way of your duties to the Night Court. You owed much to Rhys.

As you walked into the training pit, you immediately noticed the Shadowsinger's presence. His back was turned to you as he adjusted the wraps on his hands. He continued what he was doing but you could tell by the slight twitch of his wings and the movement of his shadows that he knew you had walked in.

You wondered if he wished you had stayed back, if he wanted to see you, or if he simply just didn’t care. By the way he carried himself, it seemed like the latter. You fought against the pain blooming in your chest. You always wanted to see Azriel. Right now, all you wanted was to touch him, hug him, and rest your head in the space between his wings. But you were starting to realize your feelings for Azriel were stronger than his. Was he not filled with the same need as you? The realization came to you late in the night as you replayed the argument, the way he had looked at you, talked to you.

There was no doubt in your mind anymore that you felt more for him.

Training went by agonizingly slow, your heart never slowing down, your mind never letting you forget Azriel was nearby. You had tried sneaking looks at Azriel, hoping to catch him staring at you, but he seemed unbothered by your presence, never sparing you a glance.

You couldn’t understand how he could just turn off his emotions like this. You knew becoming involved with your best friend, as emotionally challenged as he was, would be difficult, and you were aware his profession relied on detachment of emotions but how could he act like you meant nothing after having consoled you just the night before? After showing you how much he cared for you. It didn’t make any sense and you felt that you were being toyed with.

Azriel was trying very hard to stay focused on his workout. He was ready to be done for the day, not wanting to be near you any more than he had to. He felt ashamed and embarrassed at his actions from the night before, and quite frankly he had not gathered the courage needed to talk to you. During all of training, his mind kept racing with thoughts of what to say to you, jumping from one thought to the other. Azriel felt all over the place and nowhere closer to finding the words to better explain his actions. He tried keeping his eyes off you, knowing he wouldn’t be able to carry on with his day if he saw how you looked. Instead he relied on his shadows’ descriptions of you- whispers of the bags under your eyes, the frown on your face, the looks you were sending his way- which didn’t aid his overthinking.

He wanted to comfort you, to hold you, but knowing he had been the reason why you felt this way made him feel sick. Training felt like torture, his self-deprication not letting him get the relief he seeked from a hard session. Deciding he was better off in solitude today, he started getting ready to leave. He figured if he could just get away from you, the smell of you, the whispers of his shadows, he could think of an apology. All night he had replayed the possibility of telling the inner circle, of becoming official, and he couldn't escape all the negative outcomes his mind had come up with. He needed to figure out an apology that would not compromise his belief in remaining private for as long as possible- until he felt assured that nothing would go wrong.

Finishing up your last set of drills, you looked over at Azriel for the countless time that day. He was stretching, having just finished his drills as well, and the anger building up in you took over. You started walking towards him as everyone else headed out and his shadows rushed around him, probably letting their master know you were walking over. He looked from his peripheral view to confirm and straightened up, turning his back to you and starting to walk away to the changing rooms.

You were livid. The way Azriel had ignored you during training irked you in a way you had never experienced before. You had never been this angry at him. You understood the way the conversation went last night wasn't the best but he didn't have to ignore you. All morning you kept trying to make eye contact with him and he had refused to meet your eyes. And the way in which he walked away when he saw you headed towards him right now fucking hurt.

The way he was treating you hurt. Never had you felt so little and unimportant to Azriel and although you had promised yourself you would be as cold and distant as him, your anger had other plans and you were not going to stand by this treatment, not from him.

Trying to catch up to his long strides you marched after him into the changing area

pushing the door open.

"Azriel" you said stopping a few feet away, his shirt was already off, back facing towards you. You ignored the tightness around your throat and the conflicting emotions rising within you as you tried to not stare at the sweat gleaming down his back, his wings in all their majesty.

His wings twitched while the rest of his body went still at the mention of his name. He didn't respond which caused a scoff to bubble out of you. You were in complete disbelief. This did not feel like your Azriel. This dynamic between you two was completely new.

"Are you really just going to ignore me?" You asked, anger coating your voice.

He remained quiet and took a deep breath. Internally he was a mess. He didn't want to say anything that would make things worse than he already had last night. He felt if he opened his mouth he would completely ruin everything and he was trying his hardest to not let that happen by remaining silent. He knew he was being unfair to you, but he had already hurt you last night and he felt unworthy of even being in the same room as you.

You however were not understanding that. All you could see was his cool mask of indifference.

"I'm just confused, Azriel. I don't understand what's happened. I believe what I asked for isn’t unreasonable, considering we've been doing this, whatever you want to call this, for over half a year. I don't understand your reaction."

You wanted to plead with him, beg him to turn to you to listen to you, to love you. You wanted to cry and have everything be alright. But you wouldn't. Instead you straightened yourself up and narrowed your eyes.

"Azriel, turn around." you said in a low voice.

Azriels fists tightened in response, you could see his knuckles turning white.

"Azriel. turn. around. Look at me, I'm trying to talk to you. This feels weird, this isn't us. " Your voice softened, exhaustion and pain taking over you now. "I want to talk through this."

Azriel turned around, your belly fluttering with hope. You were sure if you could just discuss this, everything would be okay. Your eyes met for a second and you thought you saw sadness in his eyes when he looked at you but you blinked and his walls were back up.

"I don't want to talk right now Y/N" he grumbled, dismissing your attempts at fixing the problem.

"Then when Az? When are we going to talk? Why can't we just work this out right now? Why does it have to be a thing? Just talk to me Az." Your breathing was getting more agitated with every word you spoke, his silence cutting deeply. Still, you carried on

"I’m sorry for the words I chose last night, for how it came out but… What did you mean last night? You are enough for me, I don’t ever want you to think that you can’t give me what I need. I know you can. You already give me everything I want. I don't see how telling our friends would change anything between us."

"It would change everything, don’t you see? It already has" he said, becoming just as irritated as you. He was over this conversation, he didn't want to have it right now, not when he still hadn't found the words to explain his feelings. Gods he hadn't even been able to tell you he loved you . He wanted to do that before having to tell everyone.

"How Az? How?" You almost shouted, your patience running out, you were ready to argue it out.

Suddenly the door opened, Cassian walking in muttering about forgetting something when he abruptly stopped, noticing the tension in the room. He could see both you and Azriel breathing heavily, your fists were clenched and Azriel's shadows were mostly covering him, swarming frantically. The way you both stood looked like you were engaged in an argument and he raised an eyebrow.

"Everything okay?" He asked. He looked at Azriel's face, set on a scowl, and then at yours, noticing the tears lining your eyes and your cheeks flushed pink. “What’s going on?” he tried again when he was met with silence.

Azriel held your gaze before muttering “Nothing” and winnowing away.

You and Cassian stood in the changing rooms staring at the spot Azriel had just stood in.

You blinked the tears that had welled up away trying to not let Cassian see but it was too late. He could see the state you were in and he knew he had just interrupted an argument between you and his brother. An oddity, given how close the two of you were. What could his brother have said to have you at the point of tears? Cassian started asking “What happe-” before you cut him off “I don’t want to talk about it Cass.” and then you winnowed away, going to your meeting with Rhys.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In front of you stood your high lord and one of your best friends, Rhys. Immediately you wished you had winnowed somewhere else to compose yourself, Rhys could read everyone in the inner circle in a matter of seconds. There was no way he wouldn’t notice your current state. Your red rimmed eyes and your heaving breathing.

He took in your appearance for what felt like forever, but was really a matter of seconds, and raised his eyebrows in a questioning look.

You shook your head, letting him know you didn’t want to talk about it. He gave you a look that said he was sorry, but wasn’t going to let it go.

“Not only as your high lord, but as someone who cares very dearly for a friend, a friend that I consider family, you know I have to ask. What’s wrong?” he asked, going around his desk and leaning against it, arms crossed waiting for your answer.

You rolled your eyes “Really Rhys? You’re gonna pull the high lord card?”

He scoffed and shot you a smirk “Here I was thinking I was pulling the family card”

That made a small smile appear on your face. You knew Rhys was just worried and it wasn’t fair to take out your frustrations on him. If he showed up at your office in the same manner you would also ask.

“I’m sorry… just… feeling a little scattered. I didn’t mean to snap”

“My dear Y/N, you have been snapping at me since the day we met. I do not hold that against you. However, I will hold it against you if you keep things from me that are clearly disturbing you. I heard you missed training this week, I also heard you used your powers against Cass… and now you are showing up to our meeting, quite frankly, looking like a mess. So, what’s really been going on?”

You sighed and sat down across from him, head falling between your hands. “I can’t tell you”

At this Rhys stood a little straighter, eyebrows drawn in confusion. “You do realize one of my top spies telling me she can’t tell me something is cause for concern”

Your eyebrows rose in alarm “I don’t mean it like that Rhys, you know I tell you everything of importance. It’s just… it’s personal”

He sighed and went to sit next to you, placing an arm around you. “Alright… I won’t press you if you really don’t want to talk. Just know you can always come to me”

You leaned into his side and whispered “I know Rhys, thank you.”

He squeezed you into his size letting you rest there for a few minutes before proceeding with the meeting.

“As you know, we will be hosting a gala at the end of this week, it will be a chance to celebrate the alliances we have built after the war and for the courts to further strengthen relationships with one another. Eris is coming to stay with us for the next few days. Now that Beron’s rule is over, I have offered our courts help to Eris. I intend for the Autumn Court’s new High Lord to have as smooth a transition as possible, otherwise all our work to remove Beron was for nothing. Hopefully, in return, Eris will help us when it is time to change the ways of the Hewn City and fully be the Night Court we all dream of. Now, I need you to keep an eye on Eris. I have no reason to doubt his loyalties, but one can never be too careful. I have already told him you will be there to help with anything he needs.” said Rhys, concentrating on some documents on his desk.

“I have to babysit Eris?” you muttered, crossing your arms. You had learned to not hate the former heir, he had proved himself to the inner circle and he was often around, strategizing with Rhys and whatnot. He had asked for Mor’s forgiveness, and everything had for the most part been worked out. However, Azriel still despised Eris. The High Lord's attempt to right his wrong has done nothing to diminish Azriels’ distrust in him. Naturally, due to your proximity to the Spymaster, you had kept a professional distance from him. Never actually becoming friendly with Eris.

“If that’s what you wanna call it, yes.” Rhys looked at you with a glimmer in his eyes “But I like to think of it as giving you the honor of being an extension of me for the next couple of days” he said, shooting you a grin, knowing you would like the sound of that.

A laugh burst out of you, “Alright Rhys, you don’t have to butter me up. You know I’ll do it, shouldn’t be too bothersome. Eris hasn’t been a problem for some time” you drifted off “Although, I do I wonder how Feyre will react when I tell her I’m an extension of her husband” you joked, standing up and walking towards the door.

Rhys chuckled, muttering about the kind of trouble you would get him into.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Cassian felt weird about the interaction from earlier with you and Azriel. He was running the events of the past weeks in his head and he felt that there was something he was missing. He thought of your skipped practice, of your outburst during training, of Azriel’s mood at the debrief the other day and what he had just walked in on.

Clearly he hadn’t walked in on nothing, regardless of what Azriel said. Set on finding his brother, he wandered around the places Azriel usually frequented. He found him on his balcony, face in concentration, leaning his body over the railings, wings drooped, and shadows swarming around him in chaos. It had been a long time since he had seen his brother so out of sorts.

Cassian landed a few feet away from Azriel and approached him cautiously. Azriel looked at him from the corner of his eye and stood up straighter. “I want to be alone right now Cass.” Azriel said, trying to harden his voice to deter Cassian from trying, but Cassian knew his brother. He could hear the mask covering his turmoil.

Cassian sighed and went to stand next to Azriel. “What’s going on, brother?”

Azriel huffed and muttered “I said I wanted to be alone”

Cassian grinned at him “Since when do I follow orders from you?”

Azriel rolled his eyes but didn’t try to argue with Cassian, he knew there was no point. The general wouldn’t be leaving yet.

At Azriel’s silence, he continued. “Brother, we have been there for each other our entire lives. I am not going to leave you alone when I can so clearly see something plagues your mind.”

Azriel debated for a second telling Cassian what was wrong, he wanted to ask how Cassian navigated his relationship with Nesta. How he was able to put aside the fears and worries of things going wrong, of Nesta getting hurt because of him, but he reminded himself that Nesta was Cassian's mate. The bond tethered them to one another, and the risk of things not working out was significantly less, given that the Mother had decided they were meant for each other. No matter how many times he had prayed to the mother, you weren't his mate. He didn’t have that same level of assurance, Cassian wouldn't understand.

“I’m fine Cass, just thinking about work” Azriel said. He figured that excuse would satisfy Cassian, it wouldn’t be the first time work consumed him and had such an effect on him.

Cassian narrowed his eyes at Azriel before asking “Is that what you and Y/N were arguing about? Work?” his tone letting Azriel know that he didn’t fully buy it. At the mention of your name Azriel’s shadows became agitated again, the Shadowsinger having to reign them in from becoming a frenzied mess. He cooled his expression, hoping Cassian hadn’t caught any change in him.

“We weren’t arguing” Azriel stated, looking at Cassian in the eyes briefly before setting them back on the horizon.

Cassian scoffed “Az she was literally about to cry. Y/N always tears up during arguments. I heard some arguing before walking in, that’s why I walked in. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you two argue. What happened?”

Azriel’s jaw tensed. His chest hurt at the thought of you crying. At the thought of him making you cry. He felt that he was only making things worse. He had to fix things with you, he just needed to figure out how.

Azriel ignored Cassian and turned to walk away “I have some work to catch up on. I’ll see you tonight at dinner” he said to Cassian before winnowing away.

Cassian was left standing there wondering what the hell was going on between you and his brother.

taglist: @acotarxx @fall-myriad @moonlwghts @fictionalmenloversblog@kennedy-brooke@starswholistenanddreamsanswered @rebs2210 @angelshadowsinger @sstrohma @lahoete @alohaangels @fanboyluvr @thelov3lybookworm @hyemishii @thewarriormoon @reiincarnatiion-blog @gretavanbobatea

#azriel #fairydustblossom #losing control series #azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel shadowsinger #azriel acotar #acotar #acomaf #acowar #azriel angst #azriel fic #acotar fanfiction #azriel fluff

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studyblri · 1 month

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🐈‍⬛️༉‧˚｡🎓𖤐₊˖°. a lil update ₊ෆ🍙⋆🫧‹𝟹🎧⋆˚✧˖

⊹ I'm done with my last internship!! which means im no longer a student, but now unemployed :DD

⊹ I went to a wedding for the first time in about 7 or 8 years, i think. it was lively! (I took the middle-left picture there.)

⊹ I (unintentionally) lost weight. Around 7-8 kilos since may. i mean, i needed to lose weight and I still do, but the fact that it happened without dieting makes me happy :)

⊹ I’m visiting Germany in September!! I’m sooo excited because the only time i’ve been abroad was for just 4 days, but this time i’ll be there for almost a month!! i’m trying to stay calm, but i’m seriously so excited!!!

⊹ I need a series to binge!! i officially don’t have school starting tomorrow!! it’s impossible to believe lol. i need some dramas to watch… please suggest some ;)) (i also love true crime docuseries!)

⊹ i still have some things to do, though—like graduation and internship paperwork. It’s just paperwork, but the deadlines are important, and there’s a lot of it. So, I still need to focus and get things done. (boo hoo)

⊹ College is over, but I still need to study for language proficiency and master's exams in November. I'll be updating this blog more frequently from now on!!

⊹ I'm starting therapy this month, and this time I'm determined to go through with it. i know it's a bit ironic, being a psychology grad and being scared of therapy :) But i never knew where to start or how to openly face the challenges. Sharing everything with a stranger also feels uneasy :) I still don't feel fully ready for it, but I've decided to cross that bridge when I come to it. I just need to take that first step,,

TL;DR

I’ve closed a chapter in my life now, and I’m already excited for the next phase—my master’s journey. For this summer, I had so many plans, but I couldn’t find the time for most of them :( Now, I’ll focus on relaxing while also staying productive over the next two months. I don’t want to push myself too hard, though, because I haven’t had a vacation longer than one month since 2020!

╰┈➤‎ ‧ ₊ ˚ ✧ [ ♡٭* 🎧💿༘ ⋆๋࣭ ] ✧ ˚ ₊ ‧

For the past two weeks, I’ve been listening to just this album. Thanks to Google’s algorithm, the moment I started listening, my YouTube recommendations were flooded with analysis videos about Tyler, the Creator and IGOR :) He’s truly an amazing artist, and although I don’t have enough knowledge to praise him thoroughly, I can definitely appreciate how impressive this masterpiece is. You’ve probably heard it before, but I hope you’ll click and listen to it from start to finish again when you see this post!

bye!

#*logs #studyblr #study blog #study motivation #studyspo #life update #studying #inspo #langblog #langblr #schedule #study plan #study schedule #daily schedule #daily stuff #Spotify #*mine

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nishisun · 4 days

Text

2. How you met him & how he broke your heart.

A/N: THIS WHOLE CHAPTER IS A FLASHBACK! OKAY OKAY SO, YES, THIS IS AN SMAU, BUT ITS GONNA HAVE MORE WRITTEN PARTS 😁

NOTE (2024): this was made over 4+ years ago when i was a beginner writer so the writing is pretty much horrible. but im feel nostalgic and this has been sitting for the drafts for years that i thought, why not post? anways pls enjoy my very mediocre attempt at writing. there’s multiple parts so ill post until there are none anymore

flashback.

On December 21, your parents told you that they were separating. Your father claimed he fell out of love with your mother and already had a family in the US. You were devastated, to say the least. But mostly, you were confused. How could he? How could he do this to you, your sister, and your mother? They seemed so happy together. They never argued, well, not in front of you and your sister at least. They were the perfect couple. You looked up to them. You wanted to have what they had with your future significant other, and now your parents were telling you that they are separating because your father fell out of love?

pitiful.

Your father said he was leaving to go to the states in 6 months. Out of anger, your mother decided it was best to move, without leaving a trace of your father. She called this a clean slate. Moving meant you had to transfer schools. You were a third year, who was now going to be attending Itachiyama Institute, while your younger sister who was still in junior high was attending Okojo Middle School. Still, you couldn’t believe it. Your own father, the person you looked up to the most, was abandoning you, your mother, and your sister. Why weren’t you guys good enough for him? How come it’s so easy for him to leave? It just wasn’t fair.

What is love? Well, there are many ways to interpret the word “love”. When we love someone we experience positive thoughts and experiences with them bur we also experience a deep sense of care and commitment towards that person. Love means to be deeply committed and connected to someone or something. The feeling of love should be mutual with you and your significant other.

You loved Sakusa Kiyoomi. He was your first love.

You remembered the day you met. It was your first day at Itachiyama Institute and your previous school was Nekoma High. You were the manager for Nekoma’s volleyball team, which meant that you’d go with them to practice camps, games, and you’d stay after school hours to help out, which was why you were so close to Kenma and Kuroo. You met Kenma and Kuroo when you were a first year, you and Kenma were in the same class and you volunteered to be a manager for the volleyball team, which resulted to you becoming bestfriends with Kenma and Kuroo. You both were now finally third years, Kenma was captain of the team after Kuroo left and Kuroo couldn’t have been more proud. At first, Kenma didn’t want to be the captain because he claimed it was “too much work”, but once you and the other team members forced convinced him to try it out, he ended up loving it.

Your first day at Itachiyama was okay, you didn’t talk much, or really make new friends. It was the same old, you’d introduce yourself in front of the class, then they’d greet you and ask you questions on how your previous school was or why you moved. At lunch, you sat outside, alone, until you saw two boys walk in front of you. One was wearing a mask and the other was smiling and waved at you.

“Hello! My name is Komori Motoya and this is my cousin. We have class together, right?” he said as he brought his right arm out, offering to shake yours.

“Oh, um yes, we do! Hi Komori, my name is L/N Y/N.” you said, shaking his hand. Once you both let go you looked at Komori’s cousin who was standing next to him, but was slightly behind him.

“You must be Sakusa Kiyoomi, right?” you said walking towards him. He didn’t say anything, he just nodded while his hands were placed in his pockets.

“Uh, how did you know that?” Komori asked as he chuckled, scratching the back of his head.

“Well, I know your name too. I’ve seen you and your team play! You guys are really good.” you explained, Komori shook his head in excitement.

“Oh, really? Are you into volleyball? Do you play?” He asked.

“Well, I’m not really good at it. I used to play in junior high, but I stopped once I got into high school. I love watching the games though! I was the team manager at my previous school.”

“Really? That’s amazing! Our team is looking for a team manager! You should really apply, i’m pretty sure the coach would be happy.” Komori said.

“Oh! Well, that’s great! I’ll check definitely come visit tomorrow after school.” You said as you started to pack your things because lunch was ending soon.

“That’s great y/n!” he said, “Well, we’ll see you around in class.”

“Yeah, bye!” You waved at the two and they waved back.

“Everyone, gather around! Meet the new addition to the managers for the team! The coach said.

“My name is L/N Y/N! I’m new here and I just transferred from Nekoma High!” you said, bowing your head. Some of the teammates were whispering once they heard you mention Nekoma. “I’m hoping to get to know you all better! I’ve seen you guys play before and it’s an honor to be working with you all! you said.

“she talks a lot.” Sakusa thinks, having a bored look on his face and makes a mental note of this.

“Trust me y/n, the pleasure is ours!” the coach chuckles.

You suddenly realize how the gym is full of boys who are basically towering over you and awkwardly laugh back, followed by an awkward silence. You then remembered about the homemade granola you had made for the team, which you had been carrying this whole time.

“Oh! I almost forgot! I made some homemade granola bars to show my gratitude towards you all.” You started to pass the bars out to each team member as they thanked you and praised you for how good the bars tasted. You were making your way to give a bar to the last person who hasn’t received it yet, which was Sakusa Kiyoomi.

He was taller than his other teammates, wearing a mask and it almost seemed as if he was giving you a look of disgust, judging by the way his face was scrunched up. He looked intimidating, but you didn’t want to judge someone off of their looks, so you walked up to him and tried to start a conversation with him.

“Hello, Sakusa! I just wanted to thank you and Komori for coming up to me yesterday. It meant a lot considering the fact that I was new and i’m not very good at making friends-“

“You talk a lot.” Sakusa interrupted, his cousin heard him since he wasn’t that far away from you both and quickly walked up to him.

“Sakusa! It wouldn’t hurt you to be nice and not so upfront all the time!” his cousin said.

“I’m kidding!” sakusa says to his cousin, shaking his head and chuckles, then turns back to you.

“I’m kidding,” He repeats once again, “Sorry that I wasn’t really talking yesterday. I’m not good with people either.” He says and you both laugh. “I’m pretty sure you’re the person i’m supposed to be showing the school around to tomorrow.”

“Oh, yeah. You don’t really have to if it’s going to-“

“You really do tend to ramble a lot.” he interrupts once again. He won’t tell you, but he finds it cute how flustered you get, you seem so innocent.

“Sorry, it’s a bad habit of mine.” you scratched the back of your head and laughed a bit.

“All right everyone, Time to pack up!” the coach said, getting up from the bench.

“See you tomorrow?” Sakusa says.

“Yep!”

“Bye Y/N!” Komori says as he waved at you. You waved back and started to pack things up and went home.

1 and a half years later.

“Omi, have you seen my shampoo? I left it here at your place and I checked the bathroom and it wasn’t there anymore.” you said as you walked out of his bathroom, wearing nothing but a towel.

“No babe,” Sakusa says, “Just use mine. It isn’t that big of a deal. We can buy you your shampoo once you finish taking a shower if it’s bothering you this much.”

“It’s fine. I was just checking to see if you saw it, it isn’t that big of a deal.” you assured him with a smile.

“Maybe I should join you in the shower?” Sakusa suggested, “saves more water.”

“You’re too much.” you laughed, “let’s go shower!”

You and Sakusa finally graduated high school and decided to take a year break before attending college to spend time together since Sakusa wasn’t planning on going to college. You guys didn’t live together, He had an apartment of his own that was near your house and you’d stay there most of the time. Which meant, more sex.

Of course, it took sakusa some time to be comfortable to have sex with you, but he trusted you a lot. he knew you were clean and you took proper care of yourself

not staying abstinent from sex is something you regret, but are happy that you forgot to take the pill that one day. If you had, you still would’ve been with Sakusa. But since you didn’t, you ended up pregnant and gave birth to the person that makes you the happiest, your daughter.

You remember taking the pregnancy test, your heart dropped.

“fuck. i’m fucked.” you muttered.

Your hands were shaking as you held the pregnancy test, which said “positive” and your fingers were slowly becoming more cold by each passing seconds and your anxiety was getting the best of you.

what is sakusa gonna say? he already said he didn’t want kids. what was your mother going to say? Oh, your mother was going to kill you. Sakusa isn’t gonna like this at all. Maybe he will? Maybe he’ll tell you everything is okay and that he’ll be with you every step of the way. Should you tell Komori to tell him? No. Sakusa won’t believe him and it’ll result in him asking you anyways. Kenma! text Kenma. Then text Akira. They’ll know what to do. Wait! you need to make sure you’re 100% pregnant. This is only one test. there’s no way you’re pregnant.

So you took 2 more test. All of them were positive.

“shitt.” you took a deep breath in and closed your eyes. Tears were threatening to spill and the once appetite you once had was now gone. You were in Sakusa’s apartment bathroom, he had gone to go pick up the food you had ordered for the movie night you and him were planning to have.

You quickly got out of the bathroom and made your way to your phone to call Kenma and tell him. By now you were sobbing.

“Y/n, are you 100% sure you’re pregnant?” he said in a firm voice. He too was trying not to panic.

“Y-yes! I’ve taken like th- three test now!” you said, you were breaking down and it was hard for you to even speak clearly. “Kiyoomi i-is not going to be happy at all. I only missed one day of not t-taking the pill.”

“Y/n, i’m going to need you to breathe for me. You may not believe me now, but everything will be okay. You have to tell him. He will still love you. Isn’t it his baby?” he asked, this annoyed you. Why did he even ask that? obviously it was his. Kenma didn’t mean any harm when he asked you, but you took it to offense.

“O-obviously kozume. Why would you even ask that?” you were pacing around in the living room, trying to calm yourself down. “Kenma he’s here. He just texted me he’s outside and he’s-he’s coming. I’m scared, i don’t know how to handle this.”

“Y/n, please breathe. Everything is going to be okay please calm down, okay? You got this. If you want me to come over I can. Do you still want me to stay on the line?” he asked.

“N-no, I’m fine. Thank you Kenma. I’m gonna hang up now.”

“You’re welcome y/n. I love you.” he said, a smile resting on his face.

“love you too.”

you quickly went back to the bathroom to throw the pregnancy test away and hid it further in the trash so Sakusa wouldn’t find it. You quickly washed your face, so it would look like you weren’t crying and if he asked you why your eyes were so red you’d just say soap got in your eyes. Right when you finished washing your face, Sakusa entered the place, immediately heading to the kitchen sink to wash his hands.

“Hey,” he said grabbing the soap next to him and rubbing it with his hands.

“Hey.” you said softly, placing one hand on your opposite arm and walking towards him to embrace him.

“Happy anniversary, I love you so much.” He said, hugging you and burying his head in the crook of your neck.

“I love you more, Kiyoomi.” you said. He pulled away and stared at your face in mischief and then squinted.

“You don’t usually call me Kiyoomi unless you’re upset or worried about something. What’s up?”

Shit.

It was a bad habit of yours. When something was bothering you, or when you were upset, you’d usually call Sakusa, Kiyoomi. Usually you’d call him by his nickname, which was Omi.

“It’s nothing, Omi. I’m hungry! Let’s eat!” you say as you tried to hug him again, but he doesn’t budge.

“y/n, come on, i know you.” he says softly, as you both stood in the kitchen. He stares at you for a little longer, tucking the strands of your hair behind your ear, easing your tenseness so you could feel comfortable enough to talk to him and then cupped your cheek. “Talk to me- wait, have you been crying?”

Ugh.

you’re crying again. you’re crying really hard. Sakusa starts to panic at the random burst of tears that are falling at a rapid pace and pulls you in for a tight hug, not caring that you haven’t washed your hands yet.

“hey, hey, y/n shh, it’s okay.” Sakusa says, stroking your hair softly. “baby, talk to me. Tell me what’s wrong, please.”

You sob on his chest, he slightly cringes at the thought of your tears wetting his shirt, but he doesnt mention it.

“N-no, I cant. You’ll hate me.” you say, burying your face in his chest. Sakusa lets out a sigh of confusion and continues to stoke your hair.

“I’m pretty sure there’s nothing you could do that would make me hate you y/n. I love you, dummy.” he chuckled, you laughed as well and let go of him and wiped your tears. You took a deep breath and then let a out a forced laugh and then faced Sakusa.

“Okay,” You said letting out a sigh, “I’m,”

“you’re?”

“Never mind, I cant do this.” you walked away from him and ran to the bathroom and locked yourself there and started breaking down. Sakusa was quick to follow you, but you locked the door. You were confusing the hell out of him. He thought you were trying to break up with him.

You couldn’t tell him. Not when he had already told you he didn’t want kids. Did you even want kids? Aborting the baby was not an option. Knowing the type of person you are, you’d probably feel too guilty and you didn’t need that guilt following you for the rest of your life.

“Y/n, I understand you may need space right now. Whenever you’re ready please talk to me, I love you.”

Why was he so good to you?

About 30 minutes later, you finally come out from the bathroom and you see Sakusa scrolling through his phone. The food he had ordered was still on the table, probably cold by now.

“Hey,” you said walking up to him and sitting next to him on the couch.

“Hey,” he smiled, “you ready to talk to me now?”

“uh, yeah.” you took a deep breath, and Sakusa patiently waited for you to speak up.

“So, you know how I’m on birth control?” you asked, he cocked his head and furrowed his brows, wondering what birth control had to do with what was bothering you.

“yes..”

“Oh, okay.” you said, you took another deep breath in, then out, then you closed your eyes because you felt tears rushing down again.

“Y/n,” sakusa says softly, You rest your head on his chest once again, and he continues to softly rub your back. “Y/n, you’re scaring me. Are you breaking up with me?”

“No!” you say as you lift your head up to face him. You cup his cheek gently and give him a soft smile. “no, i’m not baby.” You put your hand down and faced forward, while sakusa was staring at you from your side. Sakusa gives a sigh of relief.

“I’m pregnant.” you blurted out.

“what?” he heard you, he just didn’t know if he heard it right.

“Kiyoomi, i’m pregnant. it’s yours.” you’re facing him now, but he looks away. He lets go of the hand that was once holding yours and faces forward.

“Omi, please say something.” you say, you started to get worried and you felt a weird sensation in your stomach as if you were about to throw up.

“Are you sure y/n? Is this some type of prank because if it is-“

“no, it’s not a prank. i’ve taken three test and they were all positive, kiyoomi. i’m pregnant.”

“holy shit.” is all he mutters, he places both of his hands together and they land on his face and the face he was currently making was unreadable. You couldn’t tell if he was mad or upset, but he certainly didn’t seem happy one bit.

“is that seriously all you’re gonna say?” you scoff, he doesn’t look at you, he’s still facing forward.

“take another test,”

“what?”

“take another test,” he repeats, now getting up from the couch and pacing up and down the living room. “you need to take another test.”

“i already told you, i took three and they were all positive-“

“just take another test y/n, damn it!” your eyes widen at his sudden burst of anger, he’s staring at you, boring his eyes onto you and then he quickly looks away and takes a steady breath in. “i need to see this for myself, just take another test, okay?”

you scoff.

you wipe of the tears on your face and you walk to the bathroom rather quickly, sakusa following not far along.

you open another one of the test that you haven’t used yet without saying a word to sakusa, he’s leaning on the bathroom door with the same bored expression he usually has on his face.

once you’ve finished, you wait a few minutes for the test to see it’s results.

positive.

“are you satisfied? or do i need to take another test?” you mutter, sakusa looks at the test that is now placed on this sink, crossing his arms.

“we can’t keep this baby-“

“what? what are you talking about?” you interrupt him. Is he being serious? He doesn’t have a say on what whether you keep the baby or not.

“y/n, think about it!” he explains, walking closer to you, “we’re 18, and i have a career that i’m working hard on and you have college-“

“are you being serious right now, kiyoomi?” you raise your voice and back away from him with a hurt expression on your face.

“Y/n, it wouldn’t be smart to keep this baby. We can’t be parents right now. I’m not ready to be a dad yet,” he’s not raising his voice because he’s trying his hardest to avoid an argument. “I cant- i can’t do this.”

“w-what?” you feel tears forming again. What can’t he do? What is he trying to say? “Kiyoomi, look, I know this is a lot. Trust me it’s a lot for me too! But i’m keeping this baby. It’s our responsibility since we weren’t responsible enough.”

He scoffs at this and shakes his head “we? we weren’t responsible? last time i checked, you were the one who didn’t do your part. all you had to do was take one damn pill. is it seriously that hard?”

He can’t seriously be blaming you right now.

“I’m sorry y/n, but i seriously can’t be a dad. We already said that we’re not having kids. They’re messy, annoying and not to mention, they cause too much stress. You have to abort the baby-“

“I don’t have to do shit,” you interrupt once again, you were crying, you were so upset. This was so unlike kiyoomi. you felt nauseous, and it wasn’t the baby. “And i never said i didn’t want kids, we never even agreed on that, you just said you didn’t want them. What happened to you? Yeah, we’re young, but i’m willing to make that sacrifice. All you’re worried about is your stupid volleyball career. I told you i’m keeping this baby and if you aren’t okay with that, then maybe we should break up!” You were yelling, too caught up in the moment to realize what you had just said, it was a lot for Sakusa to process. It’s only normal that he’d be suprised but it doesn’t mean he had to put all the blame on you. You were already aware it was partly your fault, and now you were willing to own up for your mistakes. Why wasn’t he? He looked at you in shock, then walked back and forth and you kept your eyes on him wondering what he would say next.

“you think so?”

“There’s no point in being together if you don’t want to be in this baby’s life, Kiyoomi. You know this.”

“So what, you’re just gonna let go of what we have that easily?” he asked, everything he was saying was getting on your fucking nerves.

“You think it’s easy, Kiyoomi?” you let out a humorless laugh, “You think it’s easy for me to let you go? You are literally my the love of my fucking life. The first person who made me have butterflies in my stomach when all you’d do is just stare at me. Now that a baby is on the way things are obviously going to be changing and i need to put this baby first before everything and you’re obviously not willing to do that and It hurts- it fucking hurts that you didn’t even assure me that everything was going to be alright. That you’d still love me and be right by my side even though Ive decided that i am keeping the baby. I had to call kenma right before you came and even he said you’d assure me, but you didn’t. I’m not even upset at you for being suprised, but there are better ways to react Kiyoomi, especially in situations like this. You saying you’re not ready to be a dad is okay, but the fact that you aren’t willing to make the sacrifice hurts. So don’t say it’s easy for me when you’re the one that’s letting go.”

By the time you finished speaking, you were choking on your own sobs and you could barely even speak clearly. Sakusa looked like he was on the verge of tears, but he probably didn’t want to cry in front of you. He didn’t say anything either or make eye contact with you either. He just headed to the kitchen and started cleaning out any leftovers that were too old in the fridge. You aren’t even suprised. You see, Sakusa doesn’t like opening up to people. The thought of being so vulnerable and opening up like what you had just did scared Kiyoomi. He wanted to be the one that would cheer you up when something was bothering you but when it came to him, he’d keep his emotions or how he was feeling to himself. It was a bad habit of his but you still loved him and understood that it would take some time. Yes, it does hurt that he didn’t say anything after you literally opened up, but maybe this was how it was supposed to end.

You looked at him with such disbelief. You scoffed and then wore your jacket and shoes and left.

He didn’t chase after you, it’s not like you would listen anyways. All he did was say that he wasn’t ready to be a parent and how you should abort the baby. Did he think you were ready? Because you weren’t. But you were willing to make a sacrifice for this baby of yours. There’s no point in forcing him to become a father if that’s clearly not what he wants. That’s fine though, you know you’d have other people support you, even if it meant that Sakusa wouldn’t be supporting you anymore.

“Goodbye, Kiyoomi.”

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rahhhrahhrahhh · 1 year

Note

Okay, I don't know if it will spark or not your creativity but if not don't worry, I got PLENTY of inspiration, first of all I'm an idia stan so you can expect a lot of idia and platonic ortho with me x)

So could I please ask for idia with a gn or fem s/o, whatever you wish, and his s/o never understood why blot is considered dangerous as they/she was raised by a blot entity that took a liking to them/her (and of course the blot had some brain left) and plot twist being so exposed to blot made them/her a chimeria half human half blot ! (Ortho is shown to be able to sense blot so maybe ortho was curious why they/she had such an high level of constant blot without overblotting) bonus point if /!\ chapter 6 and 7 spoiler /!\ idia bring her to styx and somehow get found out by his parents and have to explain why does he date a chimeria half blot, and how they/she are so polite

Maybe I ranted a bit too much or went too specific so feel free to cut off some parts x)

im going to name you blue blorbo or idia anon from now on

[ Went completely off chart so I'm so sorry if this isn't what you wanted!]

Tw: none that I can think of, just fluff!

Blot-chimera!reader x Idia shroud

✩̣̣̣̣̣ͯ┄•͙✧⃝•͙┄✩ͯ•͙͙✧⃝•͙͙✩ͯ✩̣̣̣̣̣ͯ┄•͙✧⃝•͙┄✩ͯ•͙͙✧⃝•͙͙✩ͯ┄•͙

You met Idia when you were fairly young, outside of his family's estate. You were playing in the forest nearby and he heard your cheerful laughter. Leaving his stuffed toys on the front lawn and out the gates, he ventured through the trees. Ortho was inside taking a nap so he was on his own, with only the sunlight guiding him.

But then

He saw you.

you looked so sweet, dancing around a small clearing in the woods. He didn't notice the blot monster lurking nearby, focusing only on you and how your laughter rung in his ears.

You heard a twig snap and gasped, finally noticing the blue haired boy. You looked at him curiously, not very spooked as to see he was a child, like you! You smiled and waved, walking over to him.

He took a step back, and you a step forward. Back, forward, back, forward, back until you had his back against a tree. You leaned in closely to admire him, his breath hitched.

"hi! My name's (name)! What's yours?"

You said, taking his hand in yours and shaking it. It took him a moment to process what was going on.

"uhm.. idia.." he replied quietly. You giggled and led him back to the small clearing "nice too meet you Idia! Would you like to play with me?"

"..sure.."

And thats were your friendship started

He'd often come over for play dates and the like, back before Ortho had the incident. His parents often wondering where he was going but didn't stop him. knowing the forest was safe and it was nearby, plus they had the tracking chip and his cellphone Incase he needed them.

But he did eventually Introduce you to his family, and boy were his parents surprised. They were wary of you at first but slowly warmed up, seeing you had no Ill intent but you did seem different from most kids.. you seemed sweet although, where were your parents?

Ortho loved you right away! He'd follow you and Idia everywhere! Playing, laughing, and laying on the grass admiring the stars.

You were there for him through everything, comforting him, giving him advice and listened to his woes.

You were his saviour, his safe space, never questioning why your blood was darker than most, unnaturally so. Your skin seeming sickly in a way. Or that strange feeling of dread he'd get when you came too close.

Eventually, he had to leave for nrc. You were upset ofcourse but you wanted him to be successful, promising him you'd be here when he came back.

And through those 4 years, you'd wait for him. The first to greet him when he'd come back from Winter break or summer vacation. The first to take him into your arms and tell him how much you missed him. The first person he'd rant to about the year.

But now he knew why he always felt strange when you'd get too close. Why you seemed different.. no, are different... He'd seen it in his fellow schoolmates.

You weren't fully human.. were you, sweetheart?

When he confronted you, you didn't know how to respond. Knowing you couldn't hide it forever but at the same time afraid of losing the one you held close. blurting it all out through tears, he finally pieced everything together. Getting the closure he needed after all these years

he held you close, shaky hands hesitantly petting your head. Now you were the one needing to be comforted. Telling him about how your parents dissapeared one night and were left all alone in your cabin in the woods, until a blot monster found you. Taking you in and raising you as its own, having been exposed to it for so many years it wasn't a surprise that it tainted your human genetics.

You cried about how you never went to a school, or a doctor, never having been let far from the forest. He nodded and squeezes you softly, calming down a bit as the only noises leaving your lips now we're hiccups and sniffling.

You were something completely different from him. A new interspecies that should be examined, something incredibly rare. But he didn't have the heart to do that to you. You were far too special, you needed to be protected.

"I promise.. to keep you s-safe and warm.. for the rest of our lives.. I've loved you for so long, (name)-chan.. I want to be with you.. s-so please accept my love..?"

His voice surprised you, looking up at him with wife curious eyes.

He said it so unsurely, you couldn't help but smile and nod your head. Burying your face into his chest, while he finally noticed the blot creature watching you both. It nodded it's head in approval and dissapeared into the dark. The dread was gone, Being replaced with happiness and relief. He picked you up and hurriedly took you into his family's mansion. Laughing loudly.

He was glad he was brave the day he met you, wandering away from his comfort zone. Otherwise, he doubted he'd have someone so perfect in his arms

[NOT PROOFREAD AND IS UNEDITED. I WILL REVIEW LATER!]

Tags: @twistedtavern

#idia x reader #idia shroud #idia twisted wonderland #idia twst #twisted wonderland idia #X reader #Fluff #Fem!reader #Blot! Reader #Twisted wonderland #Twisted wonderland x reader #Ortho shroud #Twst #Fanfic

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reyanfia · 2 years

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the warrior and his healer — neteyam x reader ☄. *. ⋆➢ part four!

other chapters are up! read it here -> chapter 1, chapter 2, chapter 3 (give this chap and part 3 some love guys)

setting: awa'atlu, pandora.

pairing: neteyam x fem!metkayina!reader

warnings: teensy bit of angst, emotions i guess, mentions of drinking (honestly dunno if that's a thing with the na'vi) aaand they kiss! cuties

summary: neteyam survives and it is all thanks to your stubbornness. you and your friends go out to celebrate after ronal chooses you as one of the healers. maybe this is where your feelings unravel.

a/n: i'm kinda wondering why chapter 1 is going up and the latest chapters are kinda slow but that's probably just how tumblr works. and lets pretend spider just doesn't exist. anyway i think this is the last chapter so enjoy! by the way the ending is to die for so make sure you read it okay im squealing

after that disastrous day, you, with the help of your friends had brought neteyam to an empty marui nearer to where most of the healers lived.

for those 4 days he was resting, you were willing to walk far to reach that marui, just to check up on him. his wounds were already stitched up, so he was healing in a stable condition.

the elder healers would find you asleep by him in the marui. the bond between both of you warmed their hearts — so they'd leave you alone with him.

the sully siblings also visit him a lot, accompanying you for a lot of the time. tsireya, ao'nung and rotxo also came to visit. the sullies, as well as jake and neytiri, couldn't stop thanking you for what you did — if you hadn't left the village, he would've been... gone.

it was clear to many people now, your affection for neteyam.

— ☄. . ⋆✧ .

you grumbled softly, a little impatient on when neteyam would finally wake up so you could talk to him again.

the village now has healed a little, but many were still closed off due to the shock of the battle. a lot were injured, some were shot, too. but luckily, they all ended up alright with the help of the tsahìk, the healers, alongside with you and a few other girls.

you gazed at the sleeping boy in front of you. "come on now, teyam. you promised you'd come back." you whispered, as if he could somehow hear you. you hoped he did. he looked peaceful, as if he wasn't just shot 4 days ago.

his usual azure blue colour turned into somewhat of a sky blue. he was a little pale, due to dehydration and not eating for the past 4 days.

you heard soft footsteps from behind you, turning around to find kiri and tuk smiling gently at you. "still waiting, i see." kiri started, nodding over to neteyam.

you turned back to look at him, bringing an arm around tuk's shoulders who sat down right next to you. "i can't miss the moment he wakes up."

kiri sits beside you. she glances over — your right hand was holding onto her brother's. she can't help but smile at the sight. you both were definitely made for each other, she noticed how your eyes were filled with care and warmth as you watched him.

there was a time during training when you had asked her, if neteyam had anyone that he liked. there was, and as we all could guess, it was you.

on some nights, before going to sleep, neteyam would talk to her about you. he would tell her what's happened when you both were out, how you were like when you were studying. it was no doubt really, that he shared your feelings.

you may have thought that he treated you like everyone else because he saw you as nothing more than a friend, but kiri noticed how he'd purposely give you the ripest fruit out of the bunch that he had collected. how he would hesitate to meet your eyes when he talked to you, but would stare at them when you weren't looking.

he cared more for you than you thought he did. he always has.

a little later, you could feel the hand you held moving slightly. your eyes that was once on the people outside snapped towards him, startling tuk and kiri a little.

your eyes scanned his face to check whether he was actually waking up or if it was just your imaginations.

"neteyam?" tuk was starting to see it too.

the world seemed a little brighter when you saw him trying to open his eyes, his brows furrowing because of the brightness that was coming in from a window.

"uh, kiri—" she caught on before you could finish and went up to shut the blinds, then came running back to your side with the hugest smile you've ever seen on her.

you couldn't help but smile yourself. "tuk! go call the others and tell them." tuk nods hurriedly and bolts out the marui. you could hear her happy giggles, and it warmed your heart even more.

"oh teyam, you're finally awake," your voice came out as a whisper, only kiri could hear you. you resisted crashing into him with a hug, knowing he needs time to — re-awaken himself? whatever it was. you let him take his time.

"______. kiri. where are the others?" there was that incredibly hoarse voice again, due to the disuse. it reminded you of how his voice was the first time tsireya brought him to your marui.

"they're coming. tuk is calling them." kiri replied for you.

the more you looked at him, finally awake and moving, the more overcome of emotion you became to be. your dear best friend — he was finally here.

he wanted to sit up, and though with your objections saying that he should lie down for a few more minutes, he shook his head, attempting to do it on his own. he couldn't though, so you and kiri helped him.

"i'd fall back asleep if i were to just lie down." he mumbled lowly, with that familiar grin on his face. you only gave him a poker-face in disbelief. "you're really joking at a time like this?"

"oh come on. you know you love me for that." he teased, giving you a full smile this time.

and you did love him for it. he was way too optimistic during troubling times, but it was exceptionally endearing to be annoyed at.

you grumbled, rolling your eyes at him. you couldn't stay mad though, it ended up in you chuckling at him with kiri. "you absolute dork."

heavy stomps from behind you caught your attention. you three looked to the entrance — and there was tsireya, ao'nung, rotxo, the other sully kids, with jake and neytiri. the look of intense relief instantly replaced their out-of-breath ones, running towards neteyam.

neytiri was the first to be kneeling beside him, immediately bringing him into an embrace. "oh, neteyam, thank eywa," she croaked out, squeezing her eyes shut.

the other sullys gathered around him, while your metkayina friends gathered behind you, smiling warmly at the re-united family in front of you.

happy tears found their way to your eyes, so then there you were, crying. you covered your mouth so you wouldn't disturb their moment.

but neteyam saw you, and brought you into their hug as well.

— ☄. . ⋆✧ .

a few days after neteyam woke up, he stayed in his family's marui to recover and regain strength. he earned it back in just a short amount of time, with you coming over a few times to give him medicines for any sort of aches. it was mostly muscle aches, meaning he insisted on you being the only one massaging him. he didn't want anybody else doing it.

this boy's gonna be the death of you. (not that you were complaining.)

then, comes a day when he was all recovered and healthy again. it happened to be the day you were finally going to take the dreaded test. neteyam came over to your marui at dawn, wanting to help you prepare for it before it starts in the morning. you really wanted him to rest a little more, but you could use some reassurance, so you let him in.

you, however, went ahead to not accept his words of consolation.

he watched you go over all the plant names, their uses, their side effects, everything that you had learnt and everything you could think of.

most of the time, you were pacing around the entire marui, and i mean entire — it was a cycle. you'd start reading the facts out on your sleeping hammock, and then you'd end up sitting under it. after that you'd roam the area where you'd prepare food, then moving across the marui to your shelves.

you only ever stopped your pacing whenever neteyam said something to try and help you. it wasn't helping though. not one bit.

this was the longest you went with rambling. and neteyam had had enough.

"_____. stop it."

"stop what?"

"that." you examined yourself. you weren't doing anything? you were walking around the entire place like a maniac, that's all. why should that be a problem?

"what about no?" you deadpanned him. he returned the same expression back to you.

he got up rigidly from where he was sitting walked towards you and placed his hands on your shoulders. "you. ______. ever since tsireya brought me to you that day, all i've ever seen you do was study, eat, train, sleep. that was all. i've seen how you would be on the verge of tears when you couldn't understand something. but then you proceed to understand it anyway. you know more than you think you do."

you gulped, shaking your head. "no. neteyam, that's different. today's the test—"

"could you listen to me? like, for once? eywa give me strength." his arms dropped to your hands, holding them with a solid grip. your eyes narrowed, "i would but the last time you wanted me to do that, would've ended up with you dying."

"but you didn't! because you saved me, for eywa's sake. you, managed to save me from a weapon that you've never ever seen in your life. do you realize that? you know enough. so could you please, please stop stumbling around like you're drugged and finally take a break. at least let's go and have food or something?"

you said nothing.

"pull yourself together now. talk to me." he pleaded with you, searching your eyes for an answer.

you averted your gaze to the ground, speechless. after all, he was right. no, not that 'you know enough since you saved me' part, but because you did seem like you were drugged. eyes and ears droopy, tail flicking around nonstop.

okay, we're kidding. you did find truth in his words, you could answer any question he asked about medicine and healing right off the bat. you were just immensely paranoid.

you gave in, sighing. "fine. let's go have breakfast." you grumbled.

he smiled softly at you, and you could swear though your heart was kind of angry at him, it skipped a beat.

he did not let go of your hand as you both walked to the eating area. didn't even let go as he walked you to the healer's test area after that.

"i know you hate me for dragging you out your misery bubble, but i know, and i swear on a million suns, you are going to do just fine."

neteyam brought his hand up from your shoulder to your face. he caressed it gently, and you were aching to lean into his touch. thankfully he pulled away his hand at the last second, giving you a smile of reassurance before he started to walk off.

you can hear some of the girls who were participating in the test swoon over his action, stopping at the second you turned around with your unintentional tired death glare.

you sat by them, waiting for the tsahìk to come and commence the assessment.

you stared at your hands that he held all morning. his touch on your face lingered, and you dwelled on it. does that mean something?

well, obviously. how are you this blind?

— ☄. . ⋆✧ .

the test was done. you exhaled sharply, being the last getting up to leave.

a hold on your wrist stopped you in your tracks. turning around, you met eyes with ronal, the tsahìk.

you had spoken to her a few times, when you were over at her marui to hang around with tsireya and ao'nung. she had an unreadable expression on her face most of the time, but in this moment, she had a glint of proudness in her eyes.

"_____. neytiri has told me how you had saved that eldest son of hers. from a sky demon's weapon. is that true?"

"uh— yes. i did do that." you nodded at her words, hesitantly meeting her eyes.

this was worse than all those study sessions. "how impressive." the tsahìk finally responded, after a few seconds of unnerving silence.

when she let go of your wrist to let you go back, you could swear you saw a pleased smile on her face.

you made the tsahìk smile. now that's something to remember.

—

the next day, you were done. the pressure on you was lifted when you completed that test, allowing yourself to finally give yourself a much needed break. so you slept in.

however, you were a light sleeper. when you heard your mother calling your name, you opened your tired eyes and got up from the hammock, scratching your head.

"_____! hurry up and get yourself ready. the tsahìk has made her choice."

your sleepy eyes widened in full alert when you heard your mother say those words. "what? already?"

you didn't wait for any other response, you ran straight to the springs to bathe yourself.

you took only a few minutes to bathe, and you neatened your hair after that.

you didn't want to bring up your hopes. if you weren't chosen, you'd only be disappointed. your entire head was absolutely blank with no expectations, on auto-pilot as you got yourself ready.

when you were done, you walked out of your marui, seeing your parents already waiting for you outside. "hurry now! the people have gathered by the shores. your friends are all waiting for you."

a small smile crept up your lips as you walked to the spot with them both. it was getting pretty exciting, at this point.

"_____!" you heard tsireya calling out for you, so you weaved through the crowd looking for her. she was near to the center of the gathering, alongside all your other friends.

your smile got even wider when you saw her. you ran over to them, tsireya jumping animatedly like a child. "i'm confident that you'll be chosen. i know you will, that's what i've always said! don't try to deny me." a beaming smile was plastered on her face. you tried to find words to respond with, but the tsahìk had already came to announce her choices.

she stood on a bed of black stone, which acted as a stage. you looked up to her, seeing a proud smile on her face. it was a rare expression to see, so you were wondering who among her choices earned so much of her approval.

"people! i'm sure we have all been waiting for this day. i will be announcing the young ladies that i have chosen to help out the healers. this is a high position, as you all may know. this work, it is a matter of life and death." she started, the crowd going silent as they took in her words.

"we'll lengthen this event no further. i have chosen 4 girls who will become healers, alongside my tsakarem, tsireya."

people around you cheered. they quickly settled down though, anticipating the tsahìk's choices.

your heart started to race faster. "the first in line, is _____!"

all eyes were on you now, and you were smiling so much your cheeks were starting to hurt. the people cheered once again, and your friends were all tugging on you. the joyous looks on their faces made your face heat up, that sense of accomplishment filling through your entire body. this was the happiest you'd been in months.

"oh, i told you! i told you, _____! i knew you'd be chosen!" tsireya was shouting so much, you were starting to worry for her throat.

you looked back to ronal, and she beckoned you to come and stand beside her.

all those sleepless nights were so worth it.

you looked into the crowd, still smiling as ronal announced the names of the 3 other girls. you didn't really know them well, but you applauded for them and smiled at them when they stood beside you. they shared that same look of glee that you had.

you couldn't quite hear what ronal had said next, because as you focused into the crowd, you found neteyam and zeroed in on his face.

he's got that gleaming smile on him that you've always found yourself weak for. he's waving at you, and cheering for you. your smile reached up to your eyes as you subtly waved back at him, your hand by your hip, hoping he'd see it. he did.

"meet us all by the cove at night." he signed, and you nodded slowly at his message. you watched as they all retreat from the crowd.

you shook your head, casting your eyes down to the ground, smiling.

you weren't exactly sure what they were planning. but what you were sure of, was that it was going to be one hell of a night.

— ☄. . ⋆✧ .

after a long day of celebrating your victory with your family members, you told your parents that you were going out to celebrate with your friends. they allowed you, but told you to not come home too late.

you skipped happily toward the cove, where it was prettiest at night. the waters surrounding it would shine, so you often went there on nights when you couldn't fall asleep.

you turned a corner and there they all were. except for tuk though. poor girl's got a bedtime.

"ah! there's my girl. see what i told you?" neteyam began, once you were in his line of sight. you hid your face behind your hands, getting all bashful at what he said. my girl. it rolled off his tongue so easily.

he guided you by your waist to where they were all sitting at — around the fire, chatting and drinking without a care in the world.

"_____! congrats on becoming a healer, seems like you'll have more guys coming to you. careful, neteyam might get jealous— ow!" ao'nung hissed, at neteyam who swatted him behind the head. "let's not go there. why would i be jealous?" you felt your heart drop a little at those last words. he seemed pretty sure about it too.

you sat in between tsireya and neteyam. you were sitting normally beside them at first, but tsireya inched closer to lo'ak, and you with neteyam. an hour later, your head was laid on his shoulder, while his head rested on yours. he had an arm around your shoulders, and you were holding his hand that was hanging off of it.

you knew everybody could see this. how both of you seemed to be too close for comfort. it certainly did not look like friendly touching either. this was some next level shit. you didn't care though, you missed him. you missed this feeling.

you took another swig of the bottle, the sour taste of fruit running down your throat. you seemed to be just fine, no dizziness or out-of-character mannerisms, you looked as normal as usual. so, you continued drinking from it.

neteyam turned his head to look at you. "might wanna calm down on that, hm?" his hand reached out to take it away from you, but you stopped it by pushing it away with your free hand. "ah-ah. this tastes nice, so i'll keep drinking."

he chuckled down at you. "you sure you won't get drunk, love?"

you were about the take another sip, but your arm stopped its own movements when you heard that name he called you. he never called you that.

you sat up straight now, looking right at him. "hm. i don't think im the drunk one here," you studied his face to check for any signs of him being tipsy, but he looked fully sober and alert.

it hit you then, so hard as if a boulder came falling from the sky. you took a deep breath in. "teyam, is there something you need to tell me?"

that voice of yours, eywa, how it affected him. and that nickname you had for him, he feels like he'd melt into the ground everytime you said it. and the way you looked at him. he ran a hand down his face before taking you by the hand, away from the others.

he brought you behind the rocky walls, taking a look behind him to be sure that no one was following you two. impatient and overcome with a wave of confidence, you tugged on his hand. "you alright?"

his jaw went slack. if you listened close enough. you could hear the gears turning in his head, thinking about what to say. after a few seconds, something finally come out of him. "i really can't pretend anymore."

ah. there it was, what you've been waiting to hear for months now. but it's not fully out yet. you decided to act oblivious and maybe, tease him. "what's happened? have i done something wrong?"

he was quick to deny it, shaking his head. "no. no, not at all. i um— gosh, don't make me say it. i can't say them."

there was the shy neteyam that you first met. unable to meet your eyes, staring at the ground.

"fine. i'll say it then," you grinned, a hand of yours reaching up to cup his face. "look at me, neteyam." you whispered, hoping he'll look at you properly. it took a second, but he's looking at you now. right into your soul.

"i see you."

those three words that left your lips — it made both of you shiver. but he was looking at you in disbelief, and it kind of scared you, fearing you said something wrong. you anxiously scanned his face for any signs, something that would tell you how he's feeling.

"please say something, teyam."

oh, you really knew what you were doing with that tone, messing with his heart like that.

"can you say that again? please?"

so there was nothing to be worried about. your stomach was doing somersaults as your eyes roamed his face, his bioluminescent freckles painted him, only making him look so much more stunning. has he been this beautiful this whole time?

with a shy smile, you placed both your hands on his shoulders, repeating the words. "i see you, neteyam. i've felt like this for the past few months now, you've really got me weak, y'know?"

he's speechless and stumped. you've got his entire heart now, right in your hands. this could've been a dream, some sick joke you were playing — but it wasn't. you loved him, and this was real.

he's brought your hands from his shoulders and into his. smiling softly down at you, he says, "yawne, you have no idea how long i've wanted to hear that."

both your hearts beat as one now that the truth was out. his hands traveled to your waist to pull you closer, and yours around his neck.

you both gave in at once.

©ronalsgirl

AND SHE'S DONE! so sorry how i didn't give more kithy kithy details but im super tired right now LMFAO

tagging: @azaleaniath @theycallmesia @saturnheartz @mirikusashes @thesecretsoftheuniverse @fanboyluvr @neteyamforlife @xaoxin @naynay2808 @parrotpeggy

tags that won't work: @amortencjja @thatonegirlwiththebeanie367 @goatmilkaddict @erenjaegerwifee [help im actually confused are these "not working tags" working or nah? cus when i type the user in after the @ it doesn't show up but it still links to your guys' accounts somehow]

thank you to everybody who's supported this miniseries. im absolutely grateful to every single one of you. <333

[dm me if you spot any errors!]

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johnslittlespoon · 6 months

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that post about bucky and all the dog metaphors actually has me shaking like i just had a panera charged lemonade dose of caffeine THE WAY IVE BEEN CONSIDERING THE EXACT SAME THINGS BUT I THOUGHT I WAS CRAZY please please write this im serious ill start writing john on his knees figurative leash is buck's hand if you do like i've already got it in my head im gonna think about it for the rest of the week anyway might as well

SJDGKK THIS HAS ME GIGGLING. I KNOW I KEEP SAYING IT BUT YES DOG CODED BUCKY IS MY FAVOURITE TROPE IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.

i am ABSOLUTELY writing the hell out of it, the amount of ideas i have for it would eat away at what few braincells i have left otherwise, and it makes me SO happy that other people love the concept just as much, it's so motivating honestly and i'm so thrilled that i get to yap about it here <33

also i know you said figurative leash but i've thought a god awful amount about gale actually collar–and–leashing john in a worrying amount of scenarios (gale holding him close with the leash while he has john on his knees and he's buried deep in his throat, gale using his leash like a handhold while he's fucking john doggy(ha)style, gale tying john to the bed post with his leash and making him watch while he touches himself, etc etc.)

the dog thing was meant to just be a maybe 3–4k word oneshot originally, but lately i've been feeling maybe a 3–4 part thing, not a chaptered fic because as soon as i call it that i know i'll feel too intimidated to write it LOL but more so a short fic? idk. i just know there's a lot of feelings–heavy stuff i wanna get into with it, but also a lot of smut ideas, but most of them won't fit naturally into the flow of the oneshot, so i'm foreseeing at LEAST one or two pwp oneshots set in the same fic lol.

it's gonna be a lot but i just. ugh. john egan is dog coded au is everything to me okay <33 it feels like my baby and it's not even written yet! i haven't even decided on a title but it's got its own playlist and everything already lol i'm in so deep :')

#dog coded bucky fic #johnslittlespoon asks #johnslittlespoon spicy

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warnersister · 6 months

Text

Chapter 4 - A glass of Bourbon from Denison

The Highwayman Series | Chapter 3 | Chapter 5

You’d agreed to work that evening with Penny but you’d spent most of the day just sat, tending to lightning. You didn’t want to speak to anyone, lost in your thoughts. “Hey, sugar” that infamous drawl came from behind you, you shut your eyes and breathed slowly, but refused to reply. Your mouth wouldn’t allow. “I know y’ told me to go. I know ‘m sorry-” “did my daddy tell ya he’d make me kick the bucket?” You asked and silence ensued “darlin,” “answer the question, hangman” he smiles and you can almost hear it “yes” “is tha’ why y’ broke your promise? That why y’ never came back?” You asked and he shoved his hands into his pockets and fidgeted his feet “yes.” You nod, still not looking at him. “Daddy had a stroke. Damn nearly killed ‘im finding us” you tell him “m sorry” he replies and you just shake your head, finally turning “what was I to you, Jake?” He surveys your face, eyes lingering on his hat on your head. “Everything.” You just look at him “fuck you were the world, my life, my light. God left a piece of me here” he shakes his head. You turn back to the horse, trying to prevent him from seeing you cry. “Goodbye, Jake.” You say, sobbing slightly and you hear nothing, only feeling arms wrapping around you and pulling you into his embrace as you cry and hit his chest as he let you. Understanding that he’d just left you without an explanation. “You’re still everything. I still love you.” He says and you just look up at him, chin resting on his chest; eyes red and sore, lips swollen. You grit your jaw. “Sheriff’s daughter” he smiles and shakes his head “got me damned wrapped around your finger, girl.” You laugh and tip your hat back so he could kiss your forehead.

You push him back. “Get out o' here.” You laugh slightly, wiping away your tears. “Go on, get. My daddy’s about to do his rounds” you say and he behinds to walk away, doing as told “Jakey” you call after him and he stops dead, eyes closed. He hadn’t heard that name in years. Not from your lips. It was blissful. “Yeah, pretty?” He turns “I’m working at the Hard Deck tonight.” You say; motioning to the saloon across the way, and he smirks “guess me and the boys'll be need a drink then.”

The bar was bustling, as Penny had promised. Men drinking to celebrate the end of a working week, a few already having a substantial more drink than they should’ve. You felt an elbow in your side, and you look to Penny who’s smirking and nodding her head towards the door “your hangman’s here” she says and the two of you connect eyes at you attempt to suppress your smile. The four of them headed across the saloon to the bar, rooster tipping hit hat at you. “What can I get y’all?” You ask “I’ll have a tall glass of you, sweetheart” rooster replied with a joking laugh but the look being shot into the side of his face suggested otherwise “shut up, Brad” you reply with a small giggle “I’ll serve the distinguished ones.” You reply, turning to Bob and Coyote “what can I get y'fine gentlemen?” “I’ll have a whiskey. Any ya recommend” Coyote replied with a smile you nodded then turned to Bob who motioned for you to lean in. He leant to your ear “can I have a glass ‘o milk? Liquor don’t settle on my stomach” he whispered sheepishly “y’ want me to hide it as a drink, darlin’?” You ask and he perks up and nods “comin’ right up, gents” you say and turn away hearing two scoffs “damn lil lady, what bad customer service!” Jake jokingly complains “well when y’all learn to be polite I’ll serve ya, let me know when that is.” You reply, pouring Jake’s favourite whiskey into two glasses, another with rum as you’d remembered Rooster’s preference. Then you grab the shaker and hide the milk to poor it in, shaking it then poring it into a port glass, sliding it across the bar to Bob with a wink. “What’s he got?” Coyote asked “well if you were cultured in your drink you’d know. Called ‘con leche’.” You tell him matter-of-factly and you see Bob smile.

You pass the whiskey to Coyote, then the other two to Rooster and Hangman. “We ain’t even order yet.” Bradley complained and you raised a brow “what? Captain Smith rum ‘nd glass of bourbon from Denison. Isn’t that right?” Brad raised his brows “good memory, girl” he said, knocking back his drink. “Can I send a drink to someone?” Jake asked and your mouth ran dry “sure” “whiskey watered down with lemonade” he said and you grinned, he remembered too. “And who would you like that sending too?” You ask, leaning over the bar “oh this mighty fine bar maid. Real stunner, she is.” He says “sorry sir, Penny don’t drink lemonade.” You reply and he shakes his head, drinking his whiskey and chuckling.

A few hours later and a couple of drinks being drank, the final call was made and a few patrons began to pay their tabs and leave. “What do I owe ya?” Brad asked, dropping his sun glasses and batting his eyelashes at you to which you laugh “nothin’ any of ya.” You say “ya sure?” He asked and you nodded “just want the lot of ya to stay out of trouble and out o' my daddy’s sight.” You reply, telling them to get gone back upstairs to Maverick's through the back door rather than the front. “I’ll hold back, walk ya home.” Jake said as the other three bid their good nights. You shake your head “it’s fine, it’s only over the road” you reply, shrugging on your jacket. “I ain’t movin’.” He replies and you just shake your head, hugging Penny goodbye and allowing him to walk you out.

“Y' gonna go ‘nd get yourself killed, boy” you tell him and he shrugs “rather die knowing I had ya than live knowing I don’t get ya” he replied, going no further than the entryway of your house. You sigh and look at him “god I missed ya” you say, crossing your arms over your chest and looking up at him, he lifted an arm over your head to rest on the top of the entrance, the other hand coming to rest on your waist. “Y' ain’t even real.” He whispered. “What would’ve happened?” You asked, cocking your head to the side. “To what, darlin?” He asks, southern drawl growing stronger as he feels your breath against his own. “If he’d never have ran y’out?” He thinks for a moment. “Well we’d probably have a house, Id’ve given up this highway gig.” He says, counting something in his mind “three or four young‘uns by now. Married, y’know baby. The works.” He says and swallows, imagining what could’ve been.

You chew your lip as he speaks “y’like the sound of that? God couldn't get that image out of my head. Pregnant with my children” he saw your eyes darken and he wraps the arm further around your waist, pulling you into him. “Could still happen darlin. We’re still young.” He whispers “'ndmy daddy still hates ya” you reply and he grunts “he ain’t gonna be round much longer” he says leaning to kiss you but you stop him, reclining back “my daddy may be an ass, but he’s still my daddy. Don’t you bad talk him.” You say and he sighs “I know girly, m’sorry. Gonna have to try harder to get his blessing, ain’t I?” He smirks and you giggle, this time allowing him to dip his head and catch your lips with his.

It was as if he’d never been away, as if he’d never left. Your lips remembered his own; like enzyme and substrate: locking perfectly together, only made for each other and no one’s else. He still had that small scar on his bottom lip, bumpy and unhealed from where he’d still bite it. “Ya let another man touch ya sugar?” He asks, growling against your lips and resting his forehead on your own. “No sir. Just you.” You say and he feels a deep clench in his stomach “you had another lady?” You ask and he picks you up, pushing you against the wall “no sugar, can’t look at another girl without thinking about ya.” He says “got me fucking hypnotised. If this was Salem you’d be tried” he joked “we’re both dead, might as well go out with ya.” You say.

“Bet you’re still as sweet as I remember” he retorts and you scoff “please, we never got to do nothin’” you reply, remembering when your father entered before you’d gotten far enough “well I ain’t gonna wait another five years” he promises and you think for a moment, looking at the empty and darkened street, then into your house, which was quiet. He was asleep.

“This better be worth dying for, Seresin.” You say, grabbing his hand and pulling him into the house and up the stairs.

Chapter 3 | Chapter 5

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linkedin-corp · 2 months

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we love essays. go ahead 🔥

SAY NO MORE FAM

CANON TTYD SONG PLAYLIST

-> ( recommended to read alongside listening! )

ENTRY 1. posin' — peggy suave (electro swing remix)

okay hear me out. this isnt entirely serious but its really really cute. works especially well with chapter 6 . im just a sucker for electro swing

ENTRY 2. ship in a bottle — fin

im gonna be honest at first this one in my head was more of a song in my "vivian and her internalized self loathing that makes her bottle her emotions towards her friends inside" saga, and it still is, but it also works really really well with what bobbery has going on. the ship and ocean sailing theming, obviously, but it does talk about a generalized chunk of emotions. needing to talk about them or else he'll sink. needing to let go. its just. aughhgghhhhhh. fuck .

ENTRY 3. unravel (specifically this english cover which i fucking love)

do i even have to explain myself. do i. 100% vivian coded. and also peach. ill be real this one fits chimera vivian more but i put it on this playlist because it also fits canon vivian too. albeit a bit less. the whole .. feeling hopeless and left behind. and wanting to be left behind. feeling like shes failed her sisters but not wanting to quite keep fighting to return to them. aughjhhj ...

ENTRY 4. eyes half closed — crywolf

okay. this is a polycule or just vivian and mario coded one to me. vivian struggling to say what she wants to ......... the mentions of leaving town ..... hhhgj:(...

ENTRY 5. bitter water — the oh hellos

okay now THIS is mario+vivian coded. duuuude the pure joy they find in eachother makes me crumble to my knees. vivian likes him so so much and mario loves her like a sodden old man loves his cats. dudeee. maybe people find it strange but who give a shit‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ they love eachother so much dude im gonna keel over

ENTRY 6. the weight of us — sanders bohlke

dude. okay. augh. the groups struggles through the journey to get the crystal stars and feeling doubt. but knowing they have to get through it no matter what. the grief and suffering. the hardships they feel together that crack them open like oysters but they seal together closer when the time nears. their own internal hardship holden secrets that stay sealed like sunken vaults, shucked away to make way for the promise of victory and eventual role to fill of heros. even if they are filled with terrors and fears, they are strong together. the time has come, and they must be brave, no matter what happens. AUJGHHH. (SOUNDS OF WAILING)

ENTRY 7. done with love — zedd

yeah its another ship coded song. honestly? i can feel tec in this. but im mega mega biased and im leaning towards marvian. mario cares alot about vivian okay . i know it in myheart. he loves her and helps her get over her insecurities and fears and i love that for them so much AUHG‼️

ENTRY 8. out of my mind — jamie berry (electro swing remix)

yeahhhhhh its another marvian one (and maybe vivibella if you swing that way too) ...OOOKAY IM CRAZY OVER HERE. LEAVE ME BE. look . to me mario is an old fashioned guy who loves his wife so much that he worries her and owns a gramophone. is that so wrong of me to assume.

ENTRY 9. willow tree march — the paper kites

haha. yeah. when i first was exposed to ttyd i did NOT expect as much grief and death as it gave. so here we are. DEFINITELY leeching off of the fact that most of them all have mortality based traumas . 100%. koops thought his dad was dead for so long. bobbery's wife literally died. the sufferers. the grievers. guys who fear the worst if they die and fail, and just fearing death in general even if it happens to everyone. there is no shot that none of them fear death in some capacity . mortality based fears are real and im projecting at this rate

ENTRY 10. king — lauren aquilina

mmmmm something something when the gang has doubts. when mario has doubts and worries. oh boy. vivian comforting mario just like he comforted her ;;;;;;; i just love giving mc's like mario anxiety its really great . i can make anything marvian if i squint its a talent

ENTRY 11. april in paris — billie holiday

the old fashioned mood is back again sorry . haha .... marvian ..... or vivibella .. coded .... (gets booed off the stage)

ENTRY 12. everything you ever — neil patrick harris

dude. dude. grodus song if i ever fucking heard it i swear to god. his feeling of superiority at the end of the tunnel. his stupid little "im better than you" monologue. except he plays it cool and actually sends shivers down your spine. a good villain in a 'has no idea what they are doing and struggled to get where they are but literally no one knows except members of the audience that think outside of the box'. and then he gets fucking crushed by both mario and bowser. fuck hes such a loser i love him.

ENTRY 13. my way — chase holfelder

ANOTHER X FUCKS SONG. this time its crump. soggy wet pathetic little freak of a guy. honestly i feel like if he really tried he would do well at trying to garner sympathy. in a theater kid dramatic way. thats what this reminds me of. but one that eventually gets into the shitty nitty gritty and sorta makes u feel something. its great

ENTRY 14. never forget you — zara larsson

hey . hey guess what. YUP ITS ANOTHER MARVIAN SONG(GETS SHOT)

ENTRY 15. calling your name — telehope

ok. uhm. so. its. its another marvian so(is killed

ENTRY 16. heart — flor

do i even have to say anything . horurhghhh. vivian (and also vivimera. they both work) and her constant identity crisis ... wanting to move forward but feeling guilty for leaving her sisters behind. yeah. yeah. real ones know how i feel about this one .

ENTRY 17. lay me down — the oh hellos

honestly i dont really have anyone for this one its just the vibes i think. the vibes of the crisp morning of everyone in the land. everyone waking up to a golden sunrise. the sandy pitter patter of feet through the land as the group goes through. the distant smell of death, but its bittersweet. its lovely

ENTRY 18. youth — daughter

oh man. this one . the promise of success, not knowing what lies ahead. those twisted and shapely, those we had known long gone. but time marches on. the goalpost needing to be touched at any cost, even at the cost of death. the heavyness of every choice, every burden left unturned. the mistakes that were made, the choices already chosen before you that choose your own branching paths. those you meet on the way and those you forget, being nothing but memories when time comes. it happens to everyone. but there is hope and love within the hurt, even if bitter. the taste of sour apples lingers, but even within those bites, there is sweetness.

ENTRY 19. unholy — the wrecks

ohhhh yeah a shadow queen song. and also the x-nauts or crump, if you think about it. but mostly shadow queen coded. the cockiness of it all. she would absolutely act soooo so cocky if anyone let her. to be honest, she deserves it. i love cunty asshole sly girlbosses. fuck. yes.

ENTRY 20. FFF — zara larsson

yeahhhhhh its a polycule song. i am nothing if not my biases. i can easily see this from either bellas or vivians pov. lovestruck idiots aughhh i love them

ENTRY 21. rubik's cube — athlete band

hhhfhfjdhf another mario (and co, if you believe it) self doubts song. man i just love making em so so so scared . scared and worried for the future, but full of wonder and hope because of the friends they all have ... auhghh ... weeps ..

ENTRY 22. cant sleep love — pentatonix

WHAT DO YA KNOW ITS ANOTHER POLYCULE CODED SONG HAAAAAHAHA ...........HAHA ......SWEATS (if i went into any more details of what i think of when this song comes on id be covered in thrown tomatoes)

ENTRY 23. lose it — oh wonder

mmmmhahahha yeahyou guessed it another marvian song.. i think mario would be a good dancer but he doesnt ever dance really.. so he and vivian dance together and ... auajjhhghhh ..........guysthey love eachother so much what if i exploded

ENTRY 24. lament for a toy factory — dr.steel

honestly? crump coded as fuck. absolute freak who loves his touys. he WOULD freak out over von grapple dude. lmao

ENTRY 25. little dark age x washing machine heart mashup remix

makes me think of whatever fucked up mental situation mario and the shadow queen would have going on while shes possessing peach would fuck him up baaaad. if the shadow queen was smart enough to capitalize on this. oh man.

ENTRY 26. too sensitive — sean kennedy

vivian coded 100%. without a doubt. shes sensitive in her own ways ... and especially sensitive against her sisters. aouhggh.

ENTRY 27. candyman — zedd & aloe blacc

DUUUUUDEEE DUDE. THIS SONG MAKES ME WEEP AND WAIL EVERY SINGLE TIME I HEAR IT. AUGH... JUST ...... THE SHEER AMOUNT OF HAPPINESS AND NOSTALGIA FLOWING OFF OF IT .... DUDDE .............. everyone being so so so happy together and having the time of their lives :(((((( having picnics and game nights and trips to scenic places and and and . oh my goddddd the gang is a FAMILYYYY they are a family i swear to godddd. they love and care about eachother so muchhhh dudeee. what if i exploded‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

ENTRY 28. my ordinary life — the living tombstone

crump song. super fucking cocky AND dramatic. lmfao

ENTRY 29. crossfire — stephen

honestlyyyyy i have so little words for this one. but man the vibes are there for me. it works. something about it just does it for me

ENTRY 30. afraid of the dark — the band camino

yeah. you guessed it. another polycule song. either mario or bella about vivian .... eeeeeuhhhhehehhee im so sick for them its unreal. the dynamic they have of being scared of eachother is sooooooo. crazy to me im crazy.sorry

ENTRY 31. labyrinth — miracle musical

YEAHHH MORE MARIO ANXIETY MUSIC!!!!!!!!! BEAMS MY LAZER THAT GIVES HIM ANXIETY AND FEAR AND TERROR AND WORRY AND—

ENTRY 32. awoken — glaze

YUPPPPP ITS TEC MUSIC. I LOVE TEC SOOOOMUCH SO IM ALSO BEAMING HIM WITH THE GUILT BEAM BWOOOOOOO i love sentient machines that learn how to love humanity ayghgrhrhhhhhh i need him to feel guilt i love him so bad . living after all of that ....... learning to love and learning to live a life of peace and carefree worries. god . he deserves so much

ENTRY 33. nowhere feels like home — the wldlfe

ohhh man yeah. vivian song. feeling so secluded and outcast even with her sisters. her memory of them being happy and carefree being lost from her sight. feeling so scared of what others think of her after joining the party even though mario has her back. fucjjjkkkk dudeeee.:(((

ENTRY 34. more than friends — aidan bissett

aaaaand another polycule song ..... this could literally go for any of them its craaaazy. silly worried dummiesssss in love i swear

ENTRY 35. love you better — the haunt

ohhh yeah vivian / marvian song. her guilt of who she is ... her anxiety surrounding her feelings ..... oh man. yeah. yeah.

ENTRY 36. real peach — henry jamison

heheeee another one for the 'mario loving his wife' collection

ENTRY 37. again — noah cyrus & xxxtentacion

even more marvian .ahaha. sweats. .. . could also be tec/peach if u dig that kinda thing

ENTRY 38. kids again — artist vs poet

itssss another marvian song.im just obsessed okay sorry.im normal i promise. .. mbfbfhdjjfjg they just love eachotherrrr :(((((( they find so much comfort in one another and it makes my heart so so happyyyy dudeeee.. this literally fits tbem so muchhhh even the lyrics brooo. it makes me want to cry so badly . mario being wreckless ... vivian being a shy beam of light ... god i love them so much

ENTRY 39. stupid — tate mcrae

ANOTHER MARVIAN SONG but this time its feels of when the one sided stuff was happening... vivian rummaging through her very very harsh self loathing during that period of unrequited feelings.. this poor lady .. aughhhh shes everything . she means everything .

ENTRY 40. two time — jack stauber

oh my goddd haha okay more marvian is the last song. oops .. anyway my emotions on this are crazy ..... vivian in her own head about what she thinks mario thinks of her .... aughhggh .... misreading the things he says and assuming the worst. making up fake scenarios in her head and then lamenting over them for hours and hours . god this poor girl someone save her.

AAAND THATS IT‼️‼️‼️‼️

ill probably update in this fashion whenever i find a new song to add to the list because im a crazy FREAK who cares wayyyyy too much about music and how well i can attach musical themes to my interests.plspls pls tell me if im right or wrong on any of these I LOVE HEARING SECOND OPINIONS IT GIVES ME LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YIPPIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!literally livepost to me u listening to these songs idc ill love you forevr music is everything to me . forreals .. ok ty for reading . bye

#REALLY REALLY LONG POST #LONG POST #IM SO SORRY IM JUST CRAZY LMAO #if anyone wants me to do an analysis/breakdown like this for the vivimera au playlist i have LET ME KNOW‼️‼️‼️#ill happily do it #theres alot of overlap with this playlist and that one #sooooo it would be fun #pm:ttyd #vivibella #marvibella #marvian #im so sick in the head looooool #letter deliveries #link's lectures

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frownyalfred · 10 months

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gah i want to catch up on sky of honey but don't want to read it around other people in case it gets spicy, and i don't have much free alone time besides In Bed (im sleep deprived enough as it is 😭)

this is just an ask in lieu of the comments that i would usually leave on a few chapters, letting you know that im going up the wall with the knowledge that there's 4-5 chapters just Waiting for me. (left off at about chapter 14 or 15) i loved reading it as long as i did, and look forward to catching up on it!! tysm for writing it 💛

No worries anon! I appreciate you letting me know. I totally get not being able/wanting to read spicy stuff around others! Or just taking a break from a certain fic in general — I do that a lot personally, actually.

I still shudder about the time a close family member caught me reading one of the most graphic hannigram fics ever next to them on the plane. I have no idea what I was thinking.

#asks #anon #myfic #theresurrectionist #a sky of honey

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skinnyazn · 2 years

Text

The Masks We Wear

Ch.4 Takes place after In the Bleak Midwinter Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x F!Reader (Jaguar) Chapters: 4/4 Notes: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT THIS IS EXPLICIT SHIT, We did it folks!, the final chapter, Ghost realizes he's just body slammed Jag into the floor, what's he gonna do???, very very smutty chapter, thanks for sticking to the end!

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | AO3 | MASTERLIST

Violent coughing filled the room as you struggled to get air back in your lungs. Your vision burned white, like blinking in the dark after staring at a light for too long. Specks flickered across the room while you struggled to focus. It felt like the corset was constricting tighter against your torso, squeezing all your organs to mush. Couldn’t breathe. The wood floor was cool against your palms as you sucked in another gasp of air.

The towering man in the skull mask stood motionless in front of you. Wide eyes behind blonde lashes stared down at your convulsing body. You’d never been on the receiving side of his violence; it was terrifying. People you know can hurt you the most. Stupid, stupid. The lack of oxygen and sedative were really messing with your head now. The beast of a man turned and strode soundlessly to the door.

You wiped the back of your hand under your nose and leaned flush against the wall, limbs heavy beside you, chest heaving. Simon hesitated between the doorframe. His bulk blended into the blackness; you couldn’t tell where the room ended and he began. He squeezed his hands into fists by his side. The leather groaned in dark.

Whipping around, he closed the distance in the blink of an eye. You immediately scrabbled for the knife as he crouched down, placing the point of its blade against his chest. Right over his heart. His eyes burned into yours like coals, smoldering and too hot and suffocating. Your hands trembled now. Couldn’t fucking breathe.

He ignored the discomfort of the knife as he leaned forward slowly, tugging off his gloves with fluidity. It was like you were frozen in place, heart threatening to burst if you moved—waiting to see if he’d strike you again and finish his job. What a way to go. But then, with the softness of his first kiss, he brushed his thumbs over your cheeks, smearing the black mascara that had run down. An apology. The tears had come from the coughing but now they wouldn’t stop.

“Jag…” Simon breathed, low and shaky and full of regret. His gaze darted to the blooming marks across your neck, then to your ruined face—eyes overflowing with shame behind those blonde lashes.

A warm hand covered both of yours. Your knuckles were white from how tightly you were gripping the knife. He hesitated—a silent ask for permission, then slowly pushed the blade away from his chest. Against your better judgement, you let him disarm you; the weapon thunked against the floor.

“Always making me cry…” Your voice faltered as you spoke.

He let out a shaky exhale, still holding you like some delicate thing.

“Sorry, luv.”

Love. That must be why.

You leaned back against the wall. “What are we doing here, Simon?”

“Was on a mission.” He didn’t remove his large hands from where he held you. “Four months to set up, Jag. Four.” Couldn’t meet your gaze anymore.

You shook your head slowly. “But I beat you to Ludovico.” It came out hoarse.

Simon sucked in a breath. “Nope. Was 'ere for someone else.” He paused. “Can’t get ‘im now, though. Mission failed.” The words enunciated; his eyes, back on you.

You sobered under that gaze, blinking to clear your lachrymal face.

“Oops.”

Simon let out a sharp exhale, nodding. The gold mask glinted in the darkness. “Yeah. Oops.”

You couldn’t breathe again, but for entirely different reasons this time. Heavy under the hollows of the skull, Simon’s gaze pierced you hotly. He always had such expressive eyes… You reached up and removed the gilded mask, disarming him now. All the rough edges and sharpness gone; only thin black fabric left. A calloused thumb stroked over your knuckles.

“You never replied…” he murmured.

Gentle hands lifted the rim of the black fabric, exposing his full lips and scars—your favorite part of his face. His bulk gravitated closer to you, closing the rift between your bodies. How could you find the words to convey the impossibility of it all? I was scared. I’ve never had a liability before. What we had burned too quickly, too intensely. I haven’t known peace since you.

“Oops,” you said instead.

And then his hands were on you as he pulled you onto his lap, kissing you to make up for the year’s absence.

They were wet and hot and thorough. His large hands worshiped you, caressing down your arms and over the binding of your corset, while yours punished him—clawing over the thick fabric of his costume.

“I missed you so fucking much,�� you whispered in a moment of vulnerability. Your head was swimming and you couldn’t tell what from anymore.

He held your face still, pulling back to look into your eyes. You melted under that gaze. “So fucking much…” he agreed, kissing across your jaw and down your neck.

Moans filled the room as he grazed and sucked at your pulse point. Your hands fumbled with the back of his mask—fingers craving the softness of his hair. Despite all the fabric of your costumes, you could feel him getting hard as you straddled him and moved your hips. Moments ago you were terrified of the man under you but now you couldn’t feel safer in his arms. Stupid, stupid.

Simon stood in one swift motion, lifting your lean body up with ease. You wrapped your legs around his torso as his mouth fell back on yours, consuming it with hasty kisses. He stumbled over to the bed, lowering you onto the surface, but you let out a hiss at the contact. Being body slammed into the fucking hardwood floor earlier left you back aching. He pulled away.

“Tender?”

You nodded.

“Turn around, then.”

You obliged.

“Loosen this fucking thing,” you awkwardly reached for the corset strings as you bent over the bed.

His chuckle came out low and rich, and it sent a flush of heat throughout your body. But his touch was gentle as he undid the laces, kissing the bend of your neck while loosening the garment. You could finally breathe again.

Leaving it halfway undone, Simon moved to your pants—a much easier endeavor. He slipped them over your hips. Your skin prickled with the contrast of the exposed air.

“Fuuuucking ‘ell,” he said under his breath. It sent more goosebumps across your flesh.

You glanced over your shoulder as best as you could in your current, bruised state. It was worth it. Simon’s face was dark, filled lust and want—no, need; like you were salvational for a man lost in sin. He wasted no time before delving into your folds with his tongue and mouth. Your knees buckled and you pressed into the bed.

“Fuck, Simon,” you moaned into the surface, gripping a fistful of the sheets.

His hot tongue laved over your pussy, drenching it with a mix of his saliva and your wetness. Hungry, slick sounds filled the room as he sucked and kissed and worked you with his mouth. It felt so fucking good. His big hands squeezed your thighs, spanning almost their entirety. Rough and calloused, they chafed your sensitive skin as he moved them upward, spreading your ass apart. He dragged his tongue up to taste you further.

“Holy fucking shit,” you gasped into the bed, canting your hips as he sloppily ate your ass. His thumb massaged your clit and rubbed the slick between your folds while his tongue teased your entrance. All the pleasure was dizzying.

“Taste so fuckin’ good, luv,” he murmured against you, pulling back slightly to watch you writhe under his touch. He pressed harder circles into your clit before finally sliding his thumb up through the folds of your soaked pussy. Your legs buckled.

He switched to his middle and ring finger as he continued to eat you out. Loud moans were all you could manage at the pleasure of being finger fucked by him. You felt the heat building in your core as he undulated them inside you while thumbing your clit.

“Thassit. Need you to come for me, doll,” he said against you. The squelching sounds that filled the room were obscene. “Come on, take what you need…”

You pushed the building pleasure from your mind, concentrating on your breathing and the discomfort of the corset digging into your ribs.

“Need you to fuck me, Simon,” you ground out. “I wanna come on your cock.”

A growl was the only way to describe the animalistic sound that Simon emitted before yanking down his pants and replacing his two fingers with his dripping hardness. The breath was knocked out of you as he sunk all the way to the hilt. You missed how delicious it felt being stretched open by the Ghost.

His grip was tight around your hips as he pounded into you at a relentless pace. Each thrust threatened to split you in half as something primal took over him. Your eyes rolled back in pleasure as you blithered incoherently into the sheets.

“Yes, fuck! Use me. Just like that,” the syllables were pounded out of you. “Please don’t fucking stop!” Your cries were muffled into the sheets.

Simon groaned and fucked you even harder at your begging. The sound of his flesh slapping against yours permeated throughout the simple room. You couldn’t hold back the orgasm that burst through your body as you came hard on his cock. His thrusts stuttered as you pulsed tightly around him.

“Fuck, that’s a good girl. Take everything you want from me,” he practically mewled. But you were so lost in your orgasm that you couldn’t even make out the rest of what he said as you spasmed underneath him.

It wasn’t long before the behemoth of a man followed. Hot cum filled you painfully deep, dripping out of you between each finishing thrust. You wanted to forever be ruined by him—to let him break you. Maybe he already had. Simon groaned into your neck as he sunk down on top of you—the weight of him crushing your small frame. He reached for your hands and ensconced them under his. It was perfection.

“Stay inside me forever,” you said as you felt him eventually get soft.

His breath warmed the side of your face as he actually laughed. It was a blissful sound. You clenched around him; he pressed you deeper into the bed.

“Anything you want, luv,” he murmured into your neck, slowly thrusting into you again. You could feel him growing harder as you moaned under his weight.

Simon traced small kisses across your cheek, over your ear, down your neck. The fabric from his mask scratched at your skin. Each thrust was languid, relaxed. Like time didn’t matter. It was maddeningly gentle. Your lips parted softly.

Twisting around to kiss him, a sharp pain shot through your spine and stopped you.

“Ahhh,” you hissed, and buried your face back into the bed.

“Sorry, doll,” Simon muttered, carefully getting off of you. The absence of him left you feeling hollow. He rolled to his side; your wetness and his cum shimmered against his massive thighs under the diffused moonlight; his cock somewhat hard.

You groaned as you righted yourself, sitting up ungracefully on the bed.

“Apology accepted.” You moved toward his trunks for thighs and licked up his length, tasting the both of you mixed together. Simon sucked in a breath—his dark eyes heavy on you. You placed a soft kiss on the head of his cock.

“Dangerous, Jag…”

Smiling, you got up and reached over on the floor, sliding your computer from the mess of your belongings. Simon watched as you took the hard-drive from the pocket of your pants that were still pooled at your feet. With some effort, you reclined on your side and inserted the drive to the computer. Its electronic glow illuminated your face as the data transferred. He chuckled at your resolve.

The beautiful man laid on his back, exhaling and pulling his fabric mask back down. Simon pressed into his comm.

“Soap, how copy?” It came out gruff. Un-composed.

You watched him over the rim of the screen. So that was Soap in the green and black.

“Soap, how—” Simon tensed; his jaw shifted under the mask. “…Heard all that?”

You smirked. What you would give to see the blush creep across his cheeks. Shifting your computer to the side, you climbed toward Simon, leaning in close to his mic.

“Hi Johnny.” Simon’s hands squeezed your ass hard as his breath hitched. All you could do was bite your lip in return. His gaze was lustful on you.

“That’s for sure,” The beautiful man cleared his throat, looking away now. “What’s the status of Yosef?”

Watching the way Simon’s chest rose, and how his eyes were now focused and sharp, made you think that maybe you had it all wrong. Maybe everything you wanted—needed—was right here. Laying calmly in front of you.

“Copy. Pull out and let’s meet at the rendezvous. This mission is over. We’ll find another way to secure Yosef.” This time he clicked off the mic.

Pushing away from the bed, you slipped off the rest of your costume. His cum dripped out of you; it’s tackiness on your inner thigh. You wiped it away before sliding on new panties, jeans, and a black turtleneck. You began to pack your things.

Behind you, Simon shifted on the bed. You could hear the rustle of fabric as he stood and dressed. He crouched down next to you and began collecting your belongings he had spilled earlier.

He handed you the computer. The transfer was complete.

“Thanks.” You secured it in your duffle.

“So.”

“So,” you replied, standing now. The skull mask was back on; all that vulnerability locked away.

“This is goodbye, then."

“Yeah… Suppose it is.”

“Right.” His eyes lingered on yours for a moment, wishing that there was more, before he turned and briskly walked toward the door.

“Simon?”

He paused.

“Where’s the rendezvous point?”

The colossus of a man turned around; his stance as rigid as earlier.

He hesitated before asking, “Why?”

“Well, seeing how my mission here is done, and how you’ll need my expertise catching this Yosef man again…” you trailed off and looked at him mischievously.

Simon walked back to you, cocking his head as he looked down. The outfit suited him; such a gorgeous man.

“Thought you worked alone, sweet’eart.”

“I did until I ran into this big pain in my ass—” but you were cut short as he lifted you and brought you back to the bed, his mask buried into the crook of your neck. You giggled as his hands found their way under your shirt and over your breasts. “What about Johnny?”

“Johnny can wait.”

“Should we switch the mic back on?”

He pinched at your nipple, giving you daggers for a glare.

“Easy now, Jag.” He continued kissing your neck. “Don’t want to make the boy too jealous.”

“Of me or you?”

But Simon only gave a gruff chuckle as he took his time undressing you again.

__________

I hope y'all enjoyed it! Here's the banter between Soap and Ghost while he was on the call.

“Soap, how copy? Soap, how—”

“You’re out o’ your mind, L.T..”

“….Heard all that?”

“Aye. Every single grunt and moan.”

“Hi Johnny.”

“Steamin’ Jesus. You’re both out o’ your minds.”

“That’s for sure. What’s the status of Yosef?”

“He’s still in the palace, but they’ve found out the data’s missing. Shit’s getting a wee bit squirrelly here.”

“Copy. Pull out and let’s meet at the rendezvous. This mission is over. We’ll find another way to secure Yosef.”

“Feckin' hell. We were so close… Heading to the rendezvous.”

__________

For those who asked to be tagged.

@deadbranch @k4marina @solidly-indulgent @embers-of-alluring @shuttlelauncher81 @emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago @tomhardy41

#my fic #my writing #simon ghost riley #simon ghost Riley x reader #simon ghost Riley x f!reader #cod ghost #cod fic #mw2 fic #ghost mw2 #oc #ghost x female reader #ghost x you #ghost x reader #ghost x jaguar #lemon #smut #my fics #johnny soap mactavish

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atvace · 1 year

Text

Lady Dior and the Seven Dilfs

Chapter 4: First Order of Business

Masterlist

Ghost, Soap, Gaz and you eventually took turns in aim training, knife throwing and handgun shooting. it was actually quite fun. A little about your before-military-background, you used to shoot water guns when youre 3, BB gel guns when youre about 7 and youve won arcade games for your little niece when youre 14.

a lot of arcade games. your younger cousins always look up on you whenever you won them prizes from huge plushies, Hotwheels, even legos.

speaking of guns, you've surfaced to the depth of the internet back when you were young. having to use your mother's iPad to access such gores and disturbing content. Adapting to the FBI, forced to eliminate people off, you had absolutely no problem.

Empathy and sympathy is out of the window. your past relationship with you ex boyfriends left you quite heartless. you got scammed in Roblox once, it is merely a canon event. the homeless guy you give your spare change to molested a school girl once and you beat him until he lost vision. world hasn't been treating you well, and you just go with the flow and give zero fucks to nearly anyone.

"nice shot, (y/n)." Gaz rests his hand to your back. you sighed proudly, "Thanks, Gaz!" you nudged his side. "You got any question, (y/n)? you said you're a little less experienced with sub machine guns." Soap stored the unused MSMC.

Back in your FBI days, handguns are the most effecient weapon you can handle. It's been a while since the last time you were using the automatic rifles because your all-gun training was when youre in early 20s. you never liked heavy machinery gun because theyre too hefty for you to bring anywhere.

you prefer something quiete, small but fast. you prefer sniper as long ranged, revolver or a usp for mid combat and knifes for close. In your horse riding phase, you possessed an archery skill. you were slightly above average but stopped after your arrow accidently killed a wild bunny.

"I genuinely think they are too heavy for me. in what I observe in myself, I think im far much better using snipers, handguns or knifes." You reloaded your empty mags of revolver. "Lads," Price peeked his head out as the four of you turned to the source of the voice. "Lets do some deathmatch."

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

"Okay the goal is basically deathmatch." Price gave everyone a compass to keep track of where we going. "but, all of you will be using either the paintbal or" he paused for a moment. "an airsoft."

You raised your eyebrow with a questioning look. "what about the mission?" Price looked at you while wearing a sunglasses and a fisherman hat, "Oh, Laswell contacted me and she said we should take our time training. the mission takes place in a deserted island. That is why I decided to play a game of deathmatch." He smiles.

"any questions?" Prive crosses his arm. "Where are you gonna wait?" Soap tilt his head, "duh" he pointed his thumb to the white single chair beach bench behind Gaz. "and youre going to..?" Gaz unfinished question turned into a hum, "I'm gonna chill. you kids go fight. also, dont aim for the head." Ghost, Gaz and Soap sprinted at the last words. leaving you and Price alone.

"(y/n), why dont you go with them?" Price walked over his bench and sat like a retired dad. "Um.. captain," you held your fingers together. "Yes, (y/n). I'm all ears." Gaz took out a newspapers and widened the main page. "By any chance, do you have a..." you cringed at your request.

"combat bow? yellow lid below the wooden table under the ventilation." Price flipped a page, which cause your eyes to spark. "Howd you know?" You smiled at him. "I bought that for you the time your demotion letter were sent to me. archery was in your resume." He sipped his lemonade, still reading the newspapers.

you instantly love him. his gesture of kindness tattooed your head, you have to give him something special for him one day or another. "what are you waiting for, go get it." He flips the paper again. "Thank you!!" you got to your feet towards the airsoft shed.

upon arrival, you saw Gaz, Ghost and Soap chattering together with weapons in their grasp. all of them were in full airsoft gear and it was your first time seeing them in full combat attire. you felt butterflies in your stomach when they walked pass you.

shooking you head, you manage to get in the shed and find the box Price told you to get. you opened it and revealed a beautiful matte black curve bow with strong wires perfectly fit for field combat. but below the shaped foam, you noticed there was another bow.

it was a compound bow. with an armguard, quiver and a few customizable arrows. but what caught you is two kunais and some static ropes. you smiled to yourself and quickly geared up.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

"I bet you don't last 5 minutes, Jhonny." Ghost mocked. "How do you know, I do cardio at least twice a week." Soap clucked his airsfot shotgun. "How are you going to last more than that in forest when you barely awake 2 minutes in bed." Ghost places his airsoft m4 to his shoulders. Gaz looked at the both of them terrified.

"Hey guys, sorry I took long." the three of them shifted their gaze at you, frozen in place. "I was actually struggling but Did i wear my harness correctly?" you turned your back facing them. the way the straps makes your thigh squished and your ass popping makes all of their jaw dropped.

"remember to stay focus, brothers." Price coughed loud enough for them breaking their gaze. "I-I mean.. you look good (y/n). I- Its just-" Soap flick his shirt as a fan as you walk towards them. "Is it hot in here?" Gaz did the same, waving his hand to his burning face, "Are you hot, (y/n)? I mean you are hot- I mean-" he snickered to himself as Ghost playfully smack the back of his head. "Mouth."

you tied the rope to the round hole in the edge of the kunai, tightening it. "Holy shit, are you going to kill us for real?" Gaz watched you taking out a real knife. "Oh, fuck. no I'm planning to climb the trees with these."

you chuckled at him the re-adjusted the strings of your bow, making sure its not loose. "are you sure youre going to wear that?" Ghost pawn himself to you, looking down to your bow then your shoes. "Oh, this?" you furrowed your eyebrow and look straight to his eyes. "No, the boots." He sternly replied.

you wore a black sleeveless turtleneck and a tight black gym pants. Soap told you wearing these wont affect much training in the range but for outdoors, I think (y/n looks fine.

You are wearing a Bershka buckle heeled Boots in black. you swifted your foot to the side, showing the shine of the leather to him then scoffed. "At least I want to be stylish when defeating you. humph," you walk past him but he stopped you by placing his enormous hand to your stomach level.

"I know its painful wearing heeled footwear, (y/n)." you look at him SURPRISINGLY soft. "As long you are comfortable, you can use anything you want. just remember, theres no fashion standards in here. Please make yourself pleasant." he finished and joined the others to the starting line, leaving you flabbergasted.

'THE COLD CASPER IS TELLING YOU TO MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME. THE COLD CASPER IS TELLING YOU TO MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME. THE COLD CASPER IS TELLING YOU TO MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME.' its not a flooded thoughts anymore, its a fucking tsunami.

"alright, sergeants. get into position." Price stated, still in his beach dad mode. you clung the bow to your back feeling soap's eyes at you. "You seriously gonna use that thing?" He chuckled. "I like my fighting style similar to my money," you draw a smirk "Old money."

"ready?" you stanced ass up, of course theyre gazing at you. "set," you draw sketches in your mind what to do next. "Go!" you lunged your knees so fast it left a hole in the ground. you felt yellings from behind, mostly Gaz and Soap's

"HOLY FUCKING SHIT SHES FAST" you cant tell if thats Gaz's or Soap's. you were far beyond allready. with your tied knifes, you jumped and throw one of it towards a huge tree and swing towards those steady large stem, climbing it.

the heels you wore made you climb the trees easier. it spikes your weight to the brances and makes you jump easier. even though you feel a slight pain in the joint in every step, you gaslight yourself that you are fine.

from tree to trees you go. you have the lower body power of a God. in distinction to thousands of miles walking around a shopping centre from around the world, your legs can kick nearly 100,000franklins. not a world record, but still something youre proud about.

you tried to look around for your first victim, but your focus was striked as a paintball went close to your side, painting blue at the branch you sat on. "You missed!" you yelled at whoever shot that to you and quickly jump to another tree

you guess that was Gaz but he was nowhere in your sight. you gambled your guesses that Soap mightve been close to Gaz because the two of them are most likely too noisy to be hidden. hunting Ghost would be the hardest for you but you want to at least beat someone.

as you were on top, you took your bow and get the arrow into the sight, aiming to the grown. you saw Soap creeping around tall grasses from an approximately 40 meters north-east in your position. you shot your plunger arrows towards Soap's shoulder and he screamed in high pitch.

"Fuck! good job, (L/N)! wherever you are.. oh there you are" Soap waved his hands at you which you returned. "I was about to aim to your heart but I'm afraid you might fall for me, Scrub daddy." you winked at him and jump to another tree, searching for Gaz.

Gaz, from another slight distance got scared from the scream and quickly scattered. you were to quick to guess where he went, but your focus broke when a splatter of paint went through your side hitting a tree. "Fuck." you quicken your pace to find a safer spot to camp.

you heard a low grunt from somewhere and assumed quickly that was Ghost. not wanting to waste anymore time, you swung yourself throught the branches from one and another, still getting shot at from behind. this time, Gaz spotted you.

Seeing a bush of plants, you rolled yourself mid air and down to the ground swiftly equip your bow to shot. refusing to make any sound, you stood still waiting for Gaz to approach you first. "(y/n), i saw you~" Gaz whistled and nerved his gun.

From the source of his voice, you knew he is around front-right side of your spot. you observe how the wind blows and the sound of leaves brushing againts each other, you pulled the arrow close to the side of your ear, aiming and gambled on how he made sounds.

one snap of a twig, you swifted your left hand and release. "OW JESUS FUCK" Gaz's claim gave a wave of relief in your heart. you pushed the bush away revealing Gaz holding his thigh with a plunged arrow sticking out.

"You okay, Gazzy?" you cooed and leaned to the tree. "Fuck you're so good, (y/n). good job." he laughed and walk towards Price's previous spot. "hm, kinky." you walk the other direction. he probably came at your statement.

You jabbed the Kunai side by side, creating a rope trap for Ghost if he ever cross the path. You knew hes not easy to caught but the least you can do is having something to watch your back. proud of your (not) good idea, you climbed a tree and hid.

not too long after, you heard rustling from across your tree. taking your chances, you aimed at whatever made that noise. and there you can see it, the top of his helmet. You gave him a warning shot by aiming inches from his head.

you peered your gaze down to your trap, biting your lip when the trap you set was disabled. "Fuck, he knew." you hissed and looked back at your compound sight.

you lost him after. you stood lazily on top of the branch and tried to look around. not long after you felt a piercing gaze from the right side of your view. you shot another arrow to a suspicious bush. but suddenly a paintbullet striked at the side of your face hitting the tree, but you anchored your body to the side too heavily.

you dodged a bullet, thats one realisation. second, you lost balance and fell. "(Y/N)!" Ghost's source of voice is nowhere to be seen but you feel yourself falling to the ground.

you landed nape first and you laid down in silent. "Fuck." you grunt in pain, crawling to the clostest bush you can find just to be hidden from plain sight. unfortunately, it has thorns but you were too lightheaded to feel more pain. you pull out your bow again and aimed towards your guesses for Ghost's bearing.

feeling your head dizzy, you accidently released your arrow and you fell to your stomach, now exposed to the forest and the person you shot. to your surprise, you saw Ghost standing in the distance, with your plunge arrow right in his heart.

at least thats what you saw before you blacked out. "Bloody fucking hell, (y/n)" You feel a soft touch to your shoulders and your back is met by a fleshy feeling. you assumed that someone placed your head to their lap. "Holy shit," Gaz's voice lingered around the air as you just painfully still there. "Did she hit her head? yes she fuckin did oh my God" you could hear Soap opening a zipper.

"I lost my vision," you said laying still in assumeable Ghost's lap. "She lost her vision?!" Gaz crawled to your side. "How many fingers am I holdin?!" He hold out two fingers. "....ten" you muttered. "Oh shit she did-" Gaz said as Soap poured out the contents of his bag.

"Fuck I forgot my portable medkit." He curses. "This will do," you feel yourself ascending to the air as Ghost picked you up, not bothering about the arrow that plunged in his chest. "Gaz, Soap, clean her shit. now." He tosses you to his shoulders unintentionally bared your ass out which made the other two stared. "Eyes down, sergeants." Ghost hissed at the two as he ran out of the forest.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

"You're not going to die, (y/n)." Price said patching up your back. you got a twig and a few cut thorns sticking in your back. you got blacked out for a few moments because your head was thrashed to a nearby rock. "But captain technically I'm dead now.." you muttered and whinced in pain as he pull the last thorn in your back.

"Why are you dead, (y/n)?" Price dabbed rubbing alcohol to a cotton to your back. "My skin is all bruised up now... my years of bodycare routine is wasted." You pouted to him. "(y/n), you'll be facing worser gushes than this. you have to manage, alright?" he wrapped a bandage over your stomach and back. "even with scars, you are still a beautiful girl."

you got back outside the field to see Gaz, Soap, and Ghost surrounding a table. you peered over to see and your eyes widened in horror. you compound bow broke into pieces as the only thing keeping it together is the strings. "Oh my God I barely used that" your knees weakened and Soap caught you on time.

"its alright, We'll tell the factory to make another." Soap patted your head and leered to your exposed bandages. "You good? I mean these" he poked your back and you stood at your feet. "Oh those are fines just a small cut." you place your hands to your hips and swayed to the side, "I'm hurt but I still look hot." you blew a kiss to him which he sneered.

"Alright, folks. Let's talk about illegal smuggling." Price place himself between you and Soap as Gaz and Ghost across the three of you. "Yippie!" you clasp your hand excitedly and watch Price scroll open the map. "(y/n), thats...not something to 'yippe' about.." Gaz frowned. "I'd like to have a coquette war crime." you sway your hair.

"Laswell detected an illegal drug smuggling and suspicious movement in the east. unfortunately they have a hostage." your smile dropped. "An Iranian prisoner is loose and assumeably made a new base undergound Verdansk," Price marked a specific land in the map with a red ink. "the hostage is an 18 years old daughter of the legislation supreme court"

when Price was explaining the mission, Ghost stared at you with an empty expression. his eyes look dull and dark. you noticed this but tried so hard to not exchange look with him.

you knew this is would be going down, you overheard Kate Laswell talking about it to your former chief, Artofay. It was bigger than what Price is explaining right now but you conclude hes just simplifying things out to make the mission more pivot. if it weren't for the demotion, you're probably at a spa right now getting ready to slay this mission over.

maybe in another universe, Leon Kennedy was your husband and you didn't get demoted. another probability that you are 141's intel for Verdansk but instead you're here being in the same team and deployed on field.

"I want everyone to be careful because we have no idea what drug they have," Price pointed the Verdansk city and Urziskan city. "there could be an injection drug, an epi-pen drug, gas drug. Verdansk is the orginate of the underground black market. I want to hear no report about any of you getting drugged." Price's tone turned sharp and serious.

"Pack for a week, we'll leave tomorrow by dusk." "Yes sir." we said in unison. "Gaz, I want you in the front line with me, Soap you will be a recon, Ghost as a watchtower and (y/n)," the mens tilts to you. "No heels." you gasped in offended.

"What?! thats bullshit." you protested. "you're bullshit," Ghost spat out. "Ghost!" Price beats the potential arguement. Gaz and soap looked at each other knowing its not the right time to talk or joke about it. "(y/n), I understand how much...vogue meant to you. but we will be going to a possible hostilities," Price softly explain to you like you are 5. "I'd like for you to wear something...safe." he finishes.

"Captain, I refuse." This time you stated coldly. "I'd like to prove it to you that I'm a woman whose capable of engaging any sort of combat in any sort of attire," You took a deep leap of faith. working in heels wasn't just a bragging thing, but its your signature way in doing your job.

Its also another way for you to remember that you mothet is always watching you. Heels meant more than fashion to you, you hold on to her decaying memories by wearing them nearly every occassion. Your mom is a huge poignant figure in your life and you'd force yourself to remember her as much as you can for the rest of your life.

but the men you're dealing now, they ain't shit. this is why you prefered working alone or with girls back in the FBI. but you don't expect the world to revolve around you, it's not how it works. really sucked to be integrated with a group of people who doesn't understand you except yourself.

that's where you have to save yourself, because who will?

"If you know about the compound bow, then I assume you know the reason behind the heels, right captain?" you smiled softly, yet cold. your eyes like siren, gazing to him for ruth.

he finally sighs in defeat, "Only if you bring a back up shoe. you know what? dismiss. 6PM in my office though." he rubbed his temper, which made Ghost iritated. "Thank you, pops!" you hugged him tightly enough to make him croaked and walk away happily leaving the four behind.

"Captain." Ghost looked to Price drawing dissapointed in his gaze. "Ghost." Price is too tired to argue with the skull man allready, Soap held Ghost's shoulder and sighs. "..Jhonny," The british tilt his head down to his mohawk. "Nah, man. let her be." Gaz commented at the telepathy phenomenon.

"Bloody fucking hell all she had to do was listen." Ghost grunts and anchored his fist to the table. "You doubt too much, Riley." Price exclaimed. "Do you not see she fell from a tree because of those damned heels?" Ghost pointed back to the forest they were practicing at. "Riley, she shot an arrow to your heart with a compound bow like a cupid, don't get me started." Price took out a cigar and lit it up.

Gaz and Soap wheezed at the fact you technically won the friendly deathmatch but stopped when Ghost glared at them. "Have a little faith, believe her for once." He huffed out the nicotine air. "Just because shes new in here, you shouldn't forgot where she came from. She goes to hell like a vacation," Price shooks the cigar, letting the ashes fall to the ground.

"The Devil wears Prada, Riley."

#task force 141 #mw2 #simon ghost riley x reader #soap mactavish x reader #gaz garrick x reader #captain price x reader

27 notes · View notes

bratshaws · 2 years

Text

through the hourglass 55. brb x oc

THIS FIC IS 18+ ONLY! MINORS PLS DNI!

a/n: HELLO MY LOVELIES IM BACK AND IM STILL LEARNING HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS HUGE ASS MONITOR LOL (also do let me know if the letters are white or black pls...AND NEXT CHAPTER IS SMUT)

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: light smut uwu

goodness gracious (pls read this one to know more what this fic is about!!)

chapter

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44/45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!! )

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix

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Rooster walks in the house with his eyes immediately moving around to find Bea and Nikki somewhere in their house. The dogs greeted him first, obviously, and then he turned his head left and right, trying to catch a glimpse of his girls “Baby?” He calls, putting his sunglasses up to his scalp “Gorgeous?”

Jolene wags her tail at him, barking quietly to call his attention, then gently nibbles his middle finger to take him away from the front door and back to the staircase. “Are they up there?” the dog obviously didn’t answer, but he knew that was the reason why she took him there. So he petted her head and slowly - and quietly - made his way up the stairs.

He checked Nicole’s room first, seeing that his daughter was sleeping soundly inside her crib with the baby monitor directed towards her. He stood by the door watching her sleep with his eyes soft and smile enamored, until he heard the softest snore coming from the master bedroom.

Rooster slowly turned around to where he could see the sliver from the inside of the room by the crack on the door. He saw Beatrice curled up on the bed, lying on his side with her body in fetal position, hair covering most of her face as she snoozed. If he had to choose which one of them looked cuter sleeping he had no answer.

Beatrice’s hands were tucked under her chin, knees up to her chest, she looked so much smaller than she actually was, it was adorable. Rooster toed out his shoes by the door, wincing when it landed on the floor a bit too loud, shifting his eyes to Beatrice and sighing when he saw she was still asleep.

He was even vagarous while climbing on the bed, flicking his eyes to Beatrice to check if she was aware of his presence and smiling when she just snuggled his pillow even more. As he lowered himself onto the bed, he noticed how she had her phone clutched tight in her hand, something she never did before.

Bradley furrowed his brows but kept that information in the back of his mind, scooting closer to Beatrice until their chests were almost touching, his hand gently caressing the side of her face.

The brunette inhaled sharply, her eyes still closed as she groaned quietly, rubbing her face in the pillow and curling onto herself even more. “Fuck,she’s so cute.” he whispered to himself, twirling a strand of hair on his index finger, rubbing it’s length with his thumb and watching it bounce back in it’s wavy shape.

He noticed how her hair was getting more wavy, no longer sleek straight as it was before Nicole was born. It was really pretty, honestly it fit her really well and from what he remembered her hair when she was younger was pretty much like that. Beatrice hums again in her sleep, a mutter of his name breaking out of her lips as her nose buries itself into his pillow and a tiny smile could be seen from her profile.

Rooster just bit his lower lip, almost in disbelief at how adorable she still was. Honestly, he’d let her sleep more, but when he looked down at his watch he noticed it was time for her to start her shower so she could go to the bar later.

He kisses her forehead first, then under her eyes and then finally the tip of her nose, “Gorgeous.” he calls gently, “Baby.” Beatrice just moaned tiredly, more of her hair falling over her face as she moved, “Pretty girl…it’s time to wake up.”

“Mmmmm….five m’re minutes….please…” but he could see she was slowly waking up, her eyes no longer shaking with dreams and her body moving a bit more than before.

“Baby, you have to get ready.” he mutters, “And so do I.” he runs the back of his finger against the bare skin of her thigh, the one that those black runner shorts hid nothing of, “We have to take Nikki to your parents,remember?”

Beatrice moans again, louder this time and her eyes move under the eyelids as if she’s trying to see in the dark. Once she figures out that makes no sense, she blinks them open, slowly, pupil enlarging and shrinking when she focuses on him and no one else but him. He’s a blob of colors at first, but once her vision sharpens she smiles tiredly, “Roos…”

“Hey,gorgeous.” he grins, “Good nap?”

“Mmmmmmhm…” she smiles even more, resting her chin on his arm, “Did you just get home?”

“Just walked past the door, gorgeous. Have you been sleeping long?”

Beatrice smacks her lips, then runs her hand through her hair to comb it back and away off her face, squinting as she looks down at her phone, “...about…thirty minutes I think.” she whispers, rubbing her eyes with her fingertips, “Nikki fell asleep and I was watching her…I think I passed out because of that too.”

“It can be very contagious.” he adds with a small grin, still caressing her thigh, “You looked so peaceful but I had to wake you up, gorgeous.”

“I know,I appreciate it Roos.” but she does snuggle closer to him, burying her face on his neck, “Hmmm, you are smelling really nice,Lieutenant.” he could feel the smile on his skin as he immediately stiffened, pupils blown wide and eyes darker than the night sky as soon as she said it.

“Bea…” he warns with a soft laugh, “Don’t start.”

“Start what?” she replies innocently, kissing right on his jugular, right where she found out was another weak spot for him, one she had to take advantage of more often. Rooster groans quietly, digging his fingers on the plush flesh of her thigh and immediately letting out a sound of disappointment when she backs away from him, “I have to shower,Rooster.”

And she bit her lower lip, sleep gone, green eyes twinkling with mirth. Rooster just watched her stand up slowly, adjusting the fabric of her shorts against her ass - the movement also caught the elastic of her underwear, snapping it against her skin but he wasn’t sure if it was on purpose or not - and her head tilted back towards him, “...you are evil.”

Beatrice smiles more, pulling the shorts up so it’d make the curve of her buttcheeks more defined, “I don’t know what you mean.”

But he smirked back at her, watching as she walked away from the bed - those hips swaying and beckoning him like a snakecharmer does to a snake - holding his head up with an arm, “Maybe we should shower together?”

“Mmmm,tempting.” comes her reply from the closet, the ruffling of clothes adding to the sound, “But we both know it’ll take longer than a normal shower for me…besides,” she peeks her head out, shrugging at him, “You can be a bit patient, can’t you?”

“...why,do you have something planned?”

“I didn’t say I had.”

“You didn’t say you hadn’t.”

She was driving him crazy, that cute little grin and her cheeks flushing were his actual weak point, hell,Beatrice herself was the weak point. She could be doing nothing and he’d still feel like a puddle next to her, “Baby.” he tries, crawling off the bed to follow her into the bathroom, “What are you planning?”

“Nothing.” she says sweetly, “I’m just…saying you can be patient.”

He is going to die because of her cheekiness.

Beatrice squeaks out in surprise when his arms wrap around her from behind, his lips touching the curve of her jaw with the fuzz of his mustache tickling her skin. The clothes she planned to wear that night were held tightly against her chest as he devoured her neck, “Rooster!”

“Tell me.” he whispers against her skin, “Let me in on your secrets, pretty girl.”

“There’s no secret,Brad.” she giggles, trying to break free from him, “I have to shower! You gotta let me go.”

“Tell me what your plan is and I will~”

“No!” she laughs, “I can’t!”

And then he lifts his head from her neck, “Ah…so there is a plan.” she just giggled again, wriggling in his grasp, “Tell me.” and he’s about to kiss her neck again when they both hear the doorbell ringing. Bradley sighs heavily, dropping his head on her shoulder with a little smile, “I think I better see who it is,huh?”

“Well,yeah,I’m going to shower, Brad.” she says, turning her head to kiss the corner of his mouth,”And maybe if you hurry you can join me. And…shower quickly.”

Rooster immediately let go of her waist, stepping away from her but then stopping and leaning closer just enough to slap her ass. The cracking sound was loud enough to echo around the bathroom, followed by Beatrice’s little scream of surprise, “Brad!”

“I’m going! I’m going!” but he does sneak one last peek at her before he leaves the room. As he grabs his phone to check who it was in the camera app, he is surprised to see it was a well dressed young man, holding at least three large boxes in his hands with choppy blue hair and round glasses.

Bradley stops at the top of the stairs, while Eleanor surrounds the front door with a low growling leaving her throat, “Can I help you?”

The young man jumps in surprise when he hears the disembodied voice, until he sees the camera “Oh, I’m sorry,I uh- I’m Caleb,I’m one of Mr.Beverly’s assistants?” he sounds extremely hesitant, maybe Rooster’s tone and Eleanor growling were to blame, “He uh, he asked me to deliver these? For Ms.Beatrice and her family? Is this the right house?”

Wait for her family?

Bradley blinks out of surprise, speeding down the steps, “Yeah hold on, let me just-Ellie back, to the kitchen with your mom and brother, go.” The white pittie mix hesitates for a minute, then turns around and trots away to the kitchen…while still keeping her head on the threshold to watch whatever was about to happen.

Rooster unlocks the door after a few seconds, only seeing the immense boxes and not the young man, that is until he craned his neck and saw the top of Caleb’s head, “Hey,” he begins, “I’m Beatrice’s husband,Bradley.”

“O-Oh,hello,” he struggles a bit but managed to hold out a hand while keeping the boxes still in his grasp, “I’m so sorry,I just started working with Mr.Beverly,” he explains as Rooster cautiously shakes his hand, “And he isn’t here now, so he uh, he asked me to deliver these?”

“Oh,okay, here. Let me help.” he knew the young man didn’t want to say yes but he did let out a very relieved sigh when Rooster slowly got the boxes out of his hand, holding them all with one of his own before putting them on the floor. “Any idea what’s in there?”

Caleb wiped his forehead, adjusting his glasses soon after, “Not a clue, the other assistants were asked to make these,I’m just the errand boy,” and he laughed awkwardly, “Well,um,I’m going to go now so…see you,thanks again!’

“No worries,kid.” Bradley waves him off, seeing a much relieved Caleb walking to a sleek black car and then driving away. Before he closes the door he feels a huge head pressing against his leg, looking down to see Eleanor looking to where Caleb drove off, “Ellie, come on, inside.” she just growls, “Don’t talk back to me,missy.”

She does have the last quiet ‘boof’ after he closes the door.

As he gathers everything in his arms, he hears the shower is still running, which meant Beatrice wasn’t done yet….and that meant he had to walk faster back to their room.

He almost throws the boxes in his haste to go into the bathroom, but he chooses to place them all on the bed. As soon as he does though, he starts removing his top and undershirt, unbuckling his belt and tossing it unceremoniously on the floor, “Roos?” he hears her calling, just as he’s pulling down his briefs, “Who was it?”

“One of Marcus’ assistants.” He has his eyes on her silhouette through the dark foggy glass, following the curves of her body, almost tripping over himself to get inside the shower as quickly as he could, “Brought some stuff over.”

“Oh, really?” She sounded so calm, a complete opposite of the feverish speed her husband was undressing himself, “That’s so sweet of him,I’ll have to send him a message later.”

“Yeah,later.” and he pulls the door open, barely giving Beatrice a chance to breathe before he slammed their lips together. She just laughed into his mouth, wrapping her arms around his neck as he pushed her backwards to the wall, where the cold tiles sent a shock all over her warm skin. “I think I was fast enough.”

“I think so too.” she squeaks into his mouth as he picks her up by the back of the legs, pressing her against the wall with her thighs wrapped tightly around his waist. Beatrice sighs softly, trying to keep her voice as quiet as she could, “We can’t spend too long here.”

“I know,gorgeous.” his hand is already moving between them, his middle finger brushing over her clit was enough to make a gentle cry break out of her, “I can make you cum twice in…maybe ten minutes?”

“T-Ten? W-We can’t–”

“Is that a nine I hear?”

“God, Brad,W-We–!”

“...hmmm…eight minutes and thirty seconds, got it.” and he has that annoyingly adorable smirk on his face when two of his fingers slide inside, making Beatrice dig her nails in his shoulders with her head thrown back in a gentle moan. He’s not going to waste too much time, like she said, they had things to do and if they spent too long people would get suspicious.

But there was something so beautiful about seeing her flushed, wet - in all senses -and trying her best to keep her voice quiet all the while bruising the upper layer of skin on his shoulders with her short nails. She sounds out of breath, almost gulping for air, trying her best to keep her moans to a minimum as he angles his wrist to hit that special spot inside of her…which she should’ve expected, so she could prevent the loud sharp yelp that broke out of her mouth, immediately biting her lips after to keep any other sound inside.

Bradley’s whisky colored eyes were on her mossy green ones, his smirk widening just as his hand moved faster. He flicked his gaze down to where her breast was just at mouth level with him, “Don’t mind if I do.” he was gentle as soon he took one in his mouth because she often complained of how sore it was,making sure to kiss the soft and heavy flesh with his fingers still moving in and out of her.

“B-Brad..” she gasps out, moving her hips in hopes to match with his own velocity, but she could barely keep up, “A-Ah! Brad,please! I need to c-cum!!”

“Oh I know.” and his hand speeds up even more, Beatrice’s soft shrieks of pleasure were his only response, her hips moving in hopes she could meet his thrusts, “I promised I would make you cum twice in less than eight minutes right?”

“Y-Yes…God…Brad!!”

“What is it,gorgeous? Hm?” his hand keeps its steady yet feverish movement, his lips on her ear, “I don’t even know what’s wetter, you or this shower.” Beatrice’s soft moan in response only ama cool made him chuckle almost darkly, he loved how vocal she was. Beatrice could barely see straight with how good he made her feel, with how much her body just ached and begged just for his fingers alone.

Beatrice’s hands slipped on his shoulders because of the water, “Brad,” it comes out in gulps of air, her body nearing the point of combustion, voice shaky and eyes trying their hardest to be open, ‘Brad…God…I’m–” her body immediately stilled, it just took a firm swipe over her clit for her orgasm to hit with full force.

The hands that slipped from his shoulders now dug into his muscles like he was a lifeline, her gentle satisfactory cry only made his grin wider, his nose buried into her wet hair as she shook with aftershocks, “Mmmm,baby?”

“J-just a second.” her voice was jittery and her hands trembled, “Just a s-second Roos.”

And he allows that, kissing her wet scalp and avoiding his own obvious predicament just so she could breathe. Beatrice hums against his skin, slowly lifting her head as if it weighed one hundred pounds, albeit she’s weakly smiling at him, “Good?”

“...great…” she whispers, cupping his cheeks so they could kiss, sliding her hands up his scalp only to earn that delicious deep groan she loved so much. It was like they were discovering each other’s bodies again with the way they were groping and touching each other, which neither of them were complaining about.

Rooster had his lips on her neck, licking and biting the skin when Beatrice suddenly stilled, “Did you hear that?”

“Mmm…what?”

“Shh,Roos.” she tilts her head up so her ear is directed to the sound, “I think it’s Nikki.”

The mention of Nicole immediately makes him lift his head and stare at her, “What?” He turns quiet after hearing the faint sound of his daughter’s mumbling and cooing as she wakes up, “...oh.” While disappointed, he shouldn’t be too surprised, Nicole did wake up during this time after all.

Beatrice smiles sweetly, “It’s okay,Roos.” she whispers, kissing his lips gently, “I can go check on her really quick and…take care of everything with you?”

Honestly he’d be up to it, but he thought better about it and just chuckled,”No,gorgeous…I’ll just have a cold shower for right now.”

“...but–”

“Pretty girl,I’m fine.” he coos, kissing her temple, “Go check on Nikki and I’ll finish it here.”

As much as she didn’t want to, ‘leave him hanging’ so to speak, she knew he had already decided and the only thing she could do was nod and walk out of the shower, grabbing her robe before giving him an apologetic look, “I’ll make it up to you.”

“Oh I know,” he smirks, swatting his hand on the buttcheeks before she could cover it, “I’m counting on it,gorgeous.”

Beatrice yelped with a laugh, narrowing her eyes at him before she pulled her hair up in a towel, walking out of the bathroom tugging the robe’s knot tight around her middle. Nicole’s little sounds were constant now, which meant she was fully awake and demanded attention, and as soon as she stepped past the threshold, her daughter’s light eyes were on her.

“Hi sweetie,” she coos down at Nicole as she leans over the crib’s gate, “Hi! You just woke up, yes I know!” Nicole was getting very talkative and for a child that just turned a month old it was quite amazing! During one of her doctor appointments,Beatrice was told that Nicole was just eager to talk to her parents, hence why she was so vocal at such an early stage of her life.

It was adorable, really, seeing how much Nikki loved both of them, “C’mere, you.” Beatrice gently picks her up, placing her daughter’s cheek on her shoulder, Nicole’s soft brown hair tickling her lips as she kisses her head, “Are you excited about staying with Nonna and Nonno? They are both so excited to see you,Nikki.”

Nicole made a little soft noise on her mother’s shoulder, nibbling the soft cloth of her robe, “Oh you are probably hungry.” she whispers, “Let’s get you ready really quick.” and since she had her robe it was a much easier access for her daughter to latch, “Ow, okay, you are hungry.”

And she latched on so quickly that Beatrice let out a sigh of relief. She was usually so fussy, refusing to eat, it was a literal breath of fresh air once she did. But her daughter’s eyes were still on her mom, light green with speckles of gold almost, the more she grew, the more Beatrice could see her characteristics clearer, “You are just unreal, just like your dad.” Beatrice whispers, brushing her daughter’s cheek with the pad of her thumb, “Unreal and perfect.”

“Unreal and perfect?” she turns her head when she hears his deep voice, like molasses, speak from the door. He’s only wearing his jeans, with his white tee balled in one of his hands as he folds his arms over his chest, “Elaborate on that.”

Beatrice laughs softly, looking back down at Nikki, “I won’t.” she smiles, “Not yet.”

“She’s eating fine?”

“Yep,” Nicole’s eyes move from Beatrice to Rooster, “Latched as soon as possible, a record time to be honest with you.”

Rooster smiled back, pushing himself from the doorframe to approach the two, “When you are done I can stay with her so you can change,” he tells Beatrice,leaning down to peck her head, “You don’t have to worry about it.”

“I know.” she replies, brushing her thumb on Nicole’s soft hand, “I won’t take too long.”

“By the way,” he says, crouching down to Nicole’s level, brushing his knuckle against her soft foot, “I placed Marcus’ gifts inside the closet, so you can check what they are later.”

“Oh, so you didn’t huh?”

“Me?” he smirks, “Of course not. You know I love surprises.”

Her cheeks flushed over his words but she just laughed, gently swatting his arm after a few seconds. Considering that time was ticking by and they had to move, Beatrice handed Nicole over to Rooster as soon as she was finished and rushed to their bedroom to change. Honestly she still had the moments from minutes before still in her mind, something that sent jolts of pleasure all over her body and she feared that it’d be the only thing in her mind the whole night.

And when she looked back at him before leaving, seeing those brown eyes twinkling with mirth and that smirk on his face…she was pretty sure it would.

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