It's like I blinked and "Haha I'm going to kill myself" became a funny joke to make again, or an alright thing to say ironically. You guys stop that. You'll feel better for not saying it, I promise.
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[Damian in the Minecraft server excitedly showing Jon his extensive (and ethical) farms that he made while Jon was banned from Minecraft to focus on studying for tests at school]
Jon: ... yeah, you're so shit at Minecraft. Looks nice though!
Damian: ?! what do you mean? I worked hard on these????
Jon: *sigh* I'll show you what a real Minecraft farm looks like!
[Jon brings him to his "farm" and proudly shows off the fact you cannot tell the pixels apart as there are so many animals in one spot]
Damian: I....... have no words for this. Our friendship is about to end over this. Think of their feelings.
Jon: but this is how you play Minecraft 😭😭 next you're going to tell me you don't even eat the animals at your farm and they're just decorative 😭
Damian: I'M A VEGETARIAN. 😡😡😡😡 I MAKE BREAD. 😡😡😡😡😡😡 LOG BACK OUT. 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡
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fantasizing about shy femmes again, hear me out. i want to dom a femme friend who's never topped before into fucking my cunt, laying down on the edge of my bed and telling her that there's nothing she could do that i couldn't handle.
"i'm tough, remember? if i'm going to give you a lesson on how to fuck, i have to see where we're starting from right? so stand between my thighs and just think about it first, you don't even have to take your cock out yet, just grind your bulge against mine while you imagine the heat of my walls around you. don't think."
she'd be too hesitant for my liking, shyly nudging up against me so i'd lock my legs behind her back, forcing her to press her hard cock against my fat cunt as the fabric separating us dampens. she'd flush, and i'd grab her hands to prevent her from trying to hide, pressing them into my thighs as i lean up into her to place a hand around her throat.
"i said, don't. think. you don't need to, baby girl, you just need to let your pretty cock make the decisions for you. i'm your friend, i wouldn't lie to you. you trust me, right? so close your eyes, brace yourself with your hands around my head, and envision yourself inside my cunt as you grind against me. if i think you're doing a good job, then we can try it with clothes off. go for it, baby girl, show me what this gorgeous body can do."
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so anyway the 2 dudes from Wandee literally fcking on the couch while The Eclipse is on in the background is not something I thought I would see on this fine Saturday afternoon---,,,
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