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#im having a serious concussion while writing this help me
neteyammeowmeow · 1 year
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No, no wait... Wait think about it...
Benthomaar, Arin, and Lloyd
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Lloyd doubts if he is a good dad, if he is good enough for his family; his son, but he tries to hide that thought. He believes that Arin can make it through his own life, that he can be responsible, and is strong enough to go through tough things, though there are times where Arin does things that makes Lloyd doubt him. Sometimes Lloyd just can't be sure about it, he can't trust himself to be confident about what he thinks, what if the way he leads or chooses his descicions ends up harming his son? He still wants to protect him, but at the same time he knows he has to let him grow and become himself.
Benthomaar wants Arin to remember that his family will always care for him, he wants to make sure Arin knows that there are people out there who care for him. Compared to Lloyd, Benthomaar is more open about his concerns, and always tells Arin to be careful, to watch out, and to remember despite how big his dreams and ambitions can be, he still has to watch out (based on his own experience). He wants Arin to remember that he is a human being despite whatever title or power he has.
All in all, they're both just a little bit scared of Arin facing the world on his own, because one day he has to. They want him to remember even though how much of a "Ninja" he is, by the end of the day he is still Arin.
(My apologies if this post gets taken down because of the video... I will restore it if I can...)
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kindness-and-friends · 5 months
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//Heya. Mod here. I have good news and bad news
Good news is I'll be pretty blunt with the lore on the souls and stuff! Ask a question about it and I'll probably answer it
Bad news is this blog will be on hiatus :( ill finish the rps tho dw
To put it simply, drama and other projects I need to work on
To put it not simply (This shit is gonna be like a whole essay. Also i didnt proofread it cuz am lazy)
Reason 1: Drama- I honestly don't know what to feel. I started this blog thinking that i can interact with all the underblogs, whatever side they may be on. I kinda wanted this blog to be neutral because I was kinda inspired by underblog💛's. I enjoyed blogs like integrityvictim and such, and followed them (i went feral in some of the reblogs lol) completely aware they were against @/thehumanofjustice. Because I wanted this blog to be enjoyed and disliked by both sides. I wanted this blog to interact with both sides.
It started with incorrect pronouns. Then our small group of underblogs had a vote I wasn't involved in nor knew anything about and out of nowhere human is the 'leader' of the underblogverse. I never liked that idea and I expressed my feelings about it before. Luckily more people can join, but nobody has. I do like the concept of @/underblogmanagement, it's a way for people to interact with others and develop their blogs. But its too early. If anything it shouldn't be called that, it shouldn't have been introduced the way it was, and it shouldn't be made now. If we want to make something like this we have to make it bigger and have every single fucking underblog lend a hand.
I wanted to stop when I got the death threats. I thought that maybe, just maybe, it was a fan of the underblogs trolling, and it wasn't actual underblogs hating me. I still think it is. I also wanted to stop when the shipping got too bad. I didn't want this to be like @/undertaleolive that was known as nothing more than being Clover's 'girlfriend'. I don't get as much asks as I used to, and I know the lot of them are from thehumanofjustice or deputyclover (im not dumb.) The only time this blog can be serious is when I make it serious. I chose to let the anons kill Willow so it could be serious. I chose to let Clover kill Willow so it could be serious. I chose to give Willow those hallucinations and give Xeon a concussion so for once this blog wouldn't just be meme asks and roleplays with close friends of mine. I feel limited.
I think underblogmanagement is dumb. I think this rivalry is dumb. I think this blog is dumb. I think the creation of a whole new tag is dumb. I think the fact that only a portion of human's friends and followers is what makes up my follower count is dumb.
I wanted to be an underblog💛 with a story, not whatever the fuck I am now
Reason 2: Other projects - I'm giving the majority of my focus and motivation on this blog. Any motivation and creativity I have for art and writing gets thrown into here with no recognition. I have other things I need to place my focus on. As @/infinitrix, may know, I haven't updated my askblog in 2 months. Instead of drawing art for that blog, I'm drawing art for this one (only to get like 2 notes). Instead of writing dialogue and lore for that one, I'm writing it for this. If the only people who'll actually see what I post are my friends, I think this blog is nothing more than a waste of motivation. I need to focus on other things, and always worrying whether I have rps to finish or art to make isn't helping at all. The majority of art requests on my main are about this blog, too, and I want to work on art that isn't related to this. The only blogs whose lore I enjoy and would like to know more of are Whisper's, Winnie's, and maybe more that i don't interact with. I do think that if there's only a few people really trying to make their blog interesting while the rest is just shits and giggles, it's useless. I put together lore and relationships and art, and it hardly gets any notes. I can say the same for @/apatientwind who makes amazing art that doesn't get notes, and @/whisper-the-human (im eating your writing style ourgh. Keep up the good work :3). And yeah. Im giving up
I'll finish the last two rps I'm in and then leave. Don't try to start any new ones, I wanna make this quick
So I will finish what's unfinished, and possibly this will become a blog to ask about the lore. Maybe one day, when I figure everything out and have more motivation, I'll get back to this. But that won't be soon.
Ill be active on @goldeneclipsee if there are actually fans out there that arent my friends and moots.
Bye.
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batarangsoundsdumb · 3 years
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Could you please recommend a few fic in Batfam.. I loved Tim centric, Batfam centric genre where they confront their issues, also the one where Bruce is not batman but his kids are vigilantes and try to hide from him, ...Please recommend some wholesome content?
oh,,, i haven't been specifically looking for those fics, so let me offer you some of the batman/batfam stuff i've been reading the past few weeks:
Abandoned, But Not Forgotten - Cdelphiki okay, i think this is just a really nice fic about bruce rescuing tim from a kidnapping and them having a nice little chat
I Used to Be an Adventurer Like You, Then I Took an Arrow to the Knee - audreycritter can't recommend this enough! it's steph & bruce centric and theyre the fucking best, they do time travel! it's so cool, please just go read it
Have I Told You About Minnie? - Hinn_Raven okay so maybe i've been on a stephanie brown kick, but she's awesome and i love her. this is about bruce as matches malone bragging about his family to a gang of assorted criminals
For the City Sweetly Whispers - Drag0nst0rm gotham talks now and she's a bitch. no i'm serious, gotham talks. this is such a great fic and i need you all to go read it right fucking now
Running Headlong Into My Arms - gleesquid hey batarangsoundsdumb, how often have you read this fic? you ask. at least 10 times, i answer. isn't it 60.000 words long? you ask. yes it is. i answer. it's a no capes au! and bruce still gets his kids!
Live While I Breathe - Batbirdies bruce wayne get therapy challenge 2k21, but he actually does it (thanks to stephanie)
thin mints - AlmondRose i don't know what girl scout cookies are and at this point i'm too afraid to ask, but this is really cute so please read about steph selling girl scout cookies to some rich bitches (including our resident fave rich bitches)
Like a Thief in the Night - Cdelphiki jason gets real clingy and bruce gets real concerned
Minimum Height Requirement - Drag0nst0rm responsible adult! bruce wayne. im not kidding, he doesnt let his children fight crime until theyre 18, yeehaw! go read it
one shot, two shots in the night - discowing bruce writes a memoir and i cry, because it's so fucking sweet. i think ive read this at least 9 times in the past 2 years and i still enjoy it so much.
Anti-Social - Unpretty (very mobile unfriendly, so read it on desktop) it's some snapshots from tim's life through social media and it's the fucking best!
not necessarily batfam:
Things My Heart Used To Know - poisonivory I can't recommend this enough! it's jayroy, no capes, and it's based off of disney's musical anastasia. it's really well written and super interesting and i love it.
And Other Hazard of Heroism - Kieron_0Duibhir bruce has a concussion and calls his best pal, superman. it's hilarious and amazing, show stopping, spectacular, fantastic, never done before, (i'll stop listing shit and let you read it now :) )
Help - Loxare the accidental child acquisition trope, but it's just a bunch of children taking one look at known crime lord red hood and thinking 'yeah he's our big brother now'
anything and everything ever written by rotasha i trust rotasha with my life and with writing the official superbat canon i have in my head
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sinkix · 4 years
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~ Haikyuu!! Boys baking with reader - Ft. Ushijima, Tendou, Oikawa, Hinata & Nishinoya ~
YO! SO UHHHH... I’M BACK??? I GUESS?? MAYBE??? After a little break I had this in my drafts for a while and realllyyy wanted to complete it since it’s such a cute concept. Honestly at this point my posting frequencies are so sporadic and random pls forgive me lmao.
@deathcab4daddy​ gave me the inspo to include Ushi and it was so funny coming up with ideas for him, he is no.1 country boi chef 
Dude I’m listening to the Mario Kart soundtrack ‘Coconut Mall’ while I continue writing this someone save me. Like u think I’m joking. UR WRONG.
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Ushijima:
The most straightforward yet idiotic baker you will ever come across.
Before you even THINK about performing step 1, he will read the entire fucking leaflet like it’s a Shakesperean monologue.
INGREDIENTS INCLUDED.
LIKE SIS I DIDN’T NEED TO KNOW IT CONTAINS  MONOCALCIUM PHOSPHATE THANK YOU.
I’m surprised he doesn’t count every single particle in the brownie mix.
You bought him a frilly cupcake-printed apron stating ‘best wife’ not expecting him to actually wear it
But since he’s secretly a big softie and treasures anything you buy he wears it proudly.
His stoic and dignified disposition is a comical contrast to the words printed on the front lmao.
Ushi best wifey bro.
The tight fit of the apron is pretty hot since it outlines every ridge of his pecs and tightly toned torso.
Gotta resist groping your mans while stirring the brownie batter.
tbh he’s more likely to grope you, he can’t resist that a$$.
And let’s face it he’s def an ass/thigh kinda guy.
Can and will try to casually initiate some form of unholy activities by lifting you up onto the kitchen counter, goading you to slowly lick the spoon and locking gazes before pulling you in for a deep, open-mouthed kiss to get a taste of the incomplete creation himself.
Ushi’s lips and brownie batter are a knock-out combo js.
Literally has the most serious face when he’s cracking the eggs into the bowl
The amount of concentration is equivalent to that of when he’s performing a serve at match-point.
HAS to set the temperature to the EXACT degree stated on the box
Everything is done by the book if you do one thing out of place he will pull you up on it lol.
“(Y/N) you were supposed to stir it for 5 minutes, not 7.”
When its done you feed him some and he can’t help but smile its so ADORBALE AHHH.
You end up eating most of it since Ushi doesn’t strike me as much of a chocolate/junk food lover.
STILL A VERY FUN BUT F R U S T R A T I N G EXPERIENCE.
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Tendou:
The complete opposite of Ushi
Does everything wrong and the unconventional way.
Absolute disaster but doesn’t even sweat it since Tendou basically thrives in chaos and the disorderly.
To him instructions are purely equivocal, will read them for five seconds then toss them away.
Step aside Gordon Ramsey, Chef Tendou is here.
Despite doing everything the unorthodox way it still comes out amazing.
Like??? how???
Will cheekily place a dollop batter on your nose then lick it off fh3jkeffefds
Or if he’s feelin’ a lil freaky, he’ll swipe it off with his long ass finger and make you suck it clean, smirking at your submission as you coat his finger with your saliva.
oop-
Constantly cracking jokes and shitty food puns, pretending to drop the bowl to make you go into preemptive cardiac arrest before you can swat him with the spatula.
While you’re waiting for the timer to ping, Satori being the schemer he is will use this as an opportunity to pull some fuckery and tease you in any way he can.
u better be praying like bodhisattva TanaNoya rn because he is MERCILESS.
Suggestive comments, the brush of his fingers against your thigh, it’ll leave you A C H I N G in frustration by the end of it.
Unholy activities aside, once your baking session is completed you finish it off by feeding PHAT forkfuls of brownie to each other and giggling like dorks when it gets all over your mouth.
The jackass actually got a fingerful and SMEARED it over your cheek and forehead, drawing a little cross and snickering when the crumbs fall onto your nose.
Tendou was smart to draw a cross bc he gonna need jesus with the ATTACK you launch on him after that, which promptly leads to an all out food war in your kitchen that neither of you want to clean up after ward.
Don’t worry though it’s Tendou, he’ll somehow find a way to make such a mundane activity fun.
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Nishinoya:
stirs WAY TOO VIOLENTLY
IT’S LIKE AN ELECTRIC WHISK ON OVERDRIVE.
IT WILL SPLATTER OVER THE COUNTER, CUPBOARDS AND EVERYTHING YOU HOLD DEAR WITHIN A 1 MILE RADIUS.
You best believe he will try and eat some of the batter and you have to swat the spoon away from his mouth since he has NO REGARD FOR THE FACT HE COULD GET SALMONELLA.
Plus you know what Noya’s like once he starts eating something the whole thing will be gone in a matter of milliseconds.
He somehow managed to get Baking powder EVERYWHERE and even gave him self a little moustache with it.
The white substance kinda looked like something else but you didn’t really wanna say lmaooo.
could explain why he has so much energy all the time oK ILL STOP-
While you’re putting the mix on the tray he is SO extra and will do fancy lil swirls and over extend his arm like a swan to gracefully spread the batter
until he nearly fucking knocks it over.
During processing time since he is so excitable and impatient you best believe he’s gonna suggest a game of ping pong or something because my guy can well and truly never sit still.
ping pong match with the spatulas, kitchen island and a hard boiled egg.
Pls be careful he will rolling thunder that egg and pimp slap it so hard with the spatula it’ll damn near give you a concussion, not intentionally, but like protect your noggin. Wear a helmet.
For the remaining 5 minutes of baking time y’all just sit like kids in front of the oven and watching it rise like starved hyena’s observing it’s pray before demolishing it into sad particles of cocoa.
And lemme tell u, once the timer pings, that baking tray is free real estate for Noya. Half of your creation will be devoured before you can even put it on a plate and marvel at your handiwork. 
He kicked your ass at spatula ping pong btw I’m sorry sweaty but short kings stay winning.
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Oikawa:
Such a dramatic bitch like he got the whole she-bang going on.
Strapped with a pink apron, a whisk at his side and standing proudly with both hands on his hips.He is prepared like a greek gladiator going into battle.
You better believe he gonna make some snarky remarks and tease your method of doing things. 
“Ah-ah-ahhh (Y/N)-chan you’re doing it all wrong, let me show you how a PRO does it.”
Proceeds to drop entire bowl on his foot and yelp like a little girl in pain.
Well and truly embarrassed with himself, you put a band-aid on his toe and he piped down after that.
Shattered big toe and mixing bowl aside, actually a really good baker??
He is a PRO at decorating, y’all decided on cupcakes since its literally his forte to make them look aesthetic and pretty.
You almost don’t wanna eat them from how good they look.
jk almost
You take it in turns breaking bits off and placing pieces into each others mouth with a loud “aaaaaahhh!”
Places a piece in your mouth, leans forward and locks lips with you in a soft, passionate kiss before pulling away and uttering the words “It tastes even better coming from your mouth ;)”
hnnnNNGGGGGGggGg.
You both whine and bicker over who cleans up after.
“You cleaaannnnn!”
“no Toru YOU clean!”
“but I made the cupcakes look pretty :(”
“not as pretty as you <3″
He did the cleaning after that.
Like just stroke his ego with some compliments and he’s whipped with a smug grin on his face for the next 30 minutes.
You decide to save the rest and bring them to his next practise.
Literally on the verge of tears when he sees you beaming and holding the platter of treats, Kiyotani mauls half of them in a matter of seconds to which Oiks gets salty over LMAO.
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Hinata:
So excited oh my god he’s so precious please protect him I will CRY-
Has a little sunflower apron on and JBJKNDDDKDW IM SMILING JUST IMAGINING HIM FIDGETING IN EXCITEMENT OVER THE THOUGHT OF BAKING COOKIES.
Yes you decided on cookies bc he goes rabid for some choc chip biccies.
You have to guide him v carefully because of how easily confused and clumsy he is.
Cannot for the life of him crack the eggs without getting a quarter of the shell in the bowl so you have to do it instead.
Has a surprising amount of strength and forearm power bc holy shit boy can stir FAST.
Hums a little tune while he does it and bobs up and down with a wide grin on his face it’s so adorable, he has such a gentle singing voice I can’t-
Attempts different shapes with the batter when pouring it onto the tray but fails pretty miserably lol.
he tried ok???
Once they’re done he takes the tray out of the oven and since it was heavy, subconsciously propped it with his knee and nearly dropped the entire tray from the pain. (I’ve actually done this before when making chicken nuggets I do not advise being that brain dead)
Had to put some burn cream on the bbies knee :’((
When you decided to dig in, he handed you a cookie that looked like a crooked circle and said he tried to make that one a heart and insisted he feed it to you.
Blushed VERY hard at the moment of silence and intense eye contact while he fed it to you.
Nearly short circuited when his fingers brushed against your lips.
Moe moe x100000000000000000000000000000
You offer to do the cleaning after because he hurt himself and you didn’t wanna make him do any work, but he still offered to wipe the surfaces for you bc he’s an angel <333
literally just wanna marry him.
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count-to-29 · 3 years
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~~OOC - Writing under the cut (not necessarily canon accurate but im proud of it so oh well)~~
—-
This wasn’t the first time Jango had been called to the medbay for one of the Alpha ARCs. They were aggressive, even as kids, and they’d make a serious threat on the battlefield.
But cramped on Kamino, with all the reckless energy of 4 year olds in eight year old bodies, they just ended up fighting each other.
The door hissed open without him even lifting a finger and he stepped in to see a Kaminoan pouring over a datapad, while a med droid floated around and fussed over a young trooper with thick curly hair down to his chin.
“Alpha-29.” Jango said, not unkindly- but not all that gently either. That was… not who he expected to see. 29 was consistently one of the few ARCs who didn’t get into fights.
The boy turned around when he was addressed, beaming like Jango had complimented him.
His face was...bad. Blood was drying in rivets down one side of his face, while his nose poured fresh blood down his chin and over his red fatigues. His right eye was swollen with a fast darkening bruise on his cheekbone, and the whites of his right were red.
“What happened?”
It was the Kaminoan, not Alpha-29 that answered.
“He sustained multiple blows to the face, resulting in a cracked nose, several rupture blood vessels in his eyes and a gash on his head.” She said, in the slow languid way common to the slender amphibians. Jango nodded slightly- the Kaminoan was apparently she seemed to decide she wasn’t needed there to babysit now that Jango was in the room.
“Alpha-29.”
“Sir?”
“What happened?”
29 swung his feet nervously, looking down.
“I lost, sir.” He said with a grin. Nothing phased this kid.
“To who?” His grin faltered. Maybe not nothing.
“I can’t tell you sir. He’ll get in trouble.”
Jango raised an eyebrow. “Will he now? Does he know you’re covering for him?”
29 laughed. “No sir. I don’t think he even realizes we’re from the same batch, nevermind-“ He gasped and covered his mouth.
“So, Alpha-28 then.”
29 looked as miserable as Jango had ever seen him. Not that he saw 29 that much.
“Why?” Jango pinched the bridge of his nose.
29 blinked up at him- well he assumed it was a blink. It was hard to tell when one of the kid’s eyes was swollen shut.
“Why did you and Alpha-28 get into a fight, and why are you covering for him?” Jango clarified. The Kaminoan didn’t say it, but he was probably concussed.
“Oh. 28 was mad that Ma-- sorry, Alpha-Two-Six and Alpha-Two-Seven beat us during a training exercise. He wanted to show them that he could beat them, but he was going try to take both of them at once and get himself killed, so I convinced him to spar with me first to “warm up”.” He did little finger quotes that Jango had no idea where he learned them from. “But really it was so he’d be able to feel better without trying to fight the others and get himself killed.” Alpha-29 paused to catch his breath, rubbing dry and flaking blood off his cheek. “I’m covering for him because I don’t want him to get reconditioned. He doesn’t like me but the older ARCs always say we’re brothers, and brothers look after each other.”
——-
The blow landed on his jaw and he stumbled back against the wall as 28 rushed him again. His stomach hurt.
“Twenty eight!” 29 bellowed, trying to catch his shoulders, only to get hit in the chest hard enough to knock the wind out of him.
“You’re useless, 29.” 28 hissed, slamming his back against the floor. “You’ve always been kriffin’ useless. They should’ve killed you when we were on Kamino. You slowed us down- you slowed me down!” 28 bared his teeth- they were sharp. Too sharp. Those aren’t 28’s teeth.
His stomach hurt.
“I’m gonna kill ya. I’m gonna tear your throat open.”
“No!” 29 tried to squirm out of 28’s hold, but it was no use. Then- bootsteps. He was saved! He twisted his head. Thank the Force. It was Kane.
The nautolan stood over the two struggling troopers, his hands clasped behind his back.
“Ka-Kane please, you gotta help me-“ 29 gasped. “Get him off me-!”
His stomach hurt.
“What are you waiting for, 28?” Kane said, as calm and cool as ever. “You have your orders. 29 is a no longer an asset to the Republic.”
“No-“ 29 cried as 28’s hands grabbed his jaw. He dimly realized 28 was going to snap his neck
“No! Please-!”
His stomach hurt.
-
29 bolted upright and fell out of his bunk, hitting his head on the duracrete floor, breathing heavily. He was ok. Right? He wasn’t fighting 28, he wasn’t having his head twisted around-
His stomach hurt.
He almost didn’t make it to the fresher before his rations from the night before came up again.
What a wonderful wake up call.
The fresher door hissed open and 29 didn’t even bother to lift his head as cool hands gathered his dark curls away from his face.
“Are you alright?” Kane asked. Kill him, 28. You have your orders.
29 shook his head. That hadn’t been the Kane holding his hair. It was just a nightmare
“Been better, boss.” He rasped, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “You didn’t happen bring my painstims from that kid- Sugar, sorry- in here did you?”
“I’m afraid not. Can you stand?”
“Sure can try.”
It took some effort for 29 to haul himself to his feet, without puking again. He almost managed to hurl on Kane’s robes. That would have been embarrassing.
“So what’s the plan for today, sir?” 29 asked as he pulled fresh fatigues on. His stitches on his stomach ached with the movement. Pain is a rock. Climb over it and don’t whine.
Kane didn’t answer at first, adjusting his glasses with that telltale furrow between his brows.
“Twenty-nine, perhaps we should go see Sugar. If you’re getting sick-“
29 winced.
“I’m not sick. Just...my rations weren’t agreeing with me. I’m fine.” Kane looked like he was about to argue. “I’m fine, sir.”
“...very well.” The Nautolan seemed resigned- clearly he wanted to press, but 29 could be as stubborn as Forge when he wanted to be. “Let us begin the day then.”
—-
He was dozing again. Curled up on the armchair behind Kane’s desk while he talked to people coming in and out of the office.
Twenty-nine.
Who knew Jedi did such menial jobs, like paper work? It was enough to drain you down to exhaustion.
“Twenty-nine! Get up, you useless fool.” Kane’s voice. But not his words. Not his clothes- it was his face, his head, but from the neck down, a mandalorian. Standing over 29.
“I said get up, sacitadr geraor.” A boot to his ribs. “Good for nothing! You don’t deserve the head on your neck. Jango was wrong about you good-for-nothing Alphas. Get up!”
“Twenty-nine, wake up.” His eyes snapped open. Kane. Why was it always Kane? A protest started in his throat, but he smothered it down.
“You were having a nightmare.” Kane said softly. A cup of tea was being pressed into his hands. “I could feel it through the Force down the hall. Enough dodging. What’s wrong?”
His throat didn’t want to work. Finally he just lifted the cup to his lips, staring at a spot over Kane’s shoulder.
Good for nothing, useless-
“It’s nothing sir.” 29 muttered. “Just...a weird dream.”
Kane frowned. “Twenty-nine, why do you keep lying about this? I just want to help.”
29 winced. Why do you keep lying, why do you keep failing, why are you so useless-
“It’s just a bad dream, sir. Nothing for you to worry about.”
Kane shook his head and nudged 29’ hand holding the tea. “Drink. It’ll calm you down.”
29 was a stubborn bastard, but he didn’t disobey direct orders. He lifted the cup as Kane continued.
“It is something for me to worry about, 29, because you’re under my command. It’s my job, right now, to make sure you don’t get hurt-“
“No, it’s not,” He shouldn’t have interrupted, 29 knew that. “It’s not your job to make sure I don’t get hurt. It’s your job to order me into battle. It’s my job to jump in front of a blaster shot for you. That’s what our jobs are, sir.” He didn’t set the cup down. “Sorry. I just- don’t sugar coat things for me sir. I know what I’m meant for. I won’t be useless.”
Kane was quiet for a long moment and 29 thought maybe- maybe- he would let it drop, and just give 29 some weird Jedi tea to make the nightmares stop.
“Is that truly what you think? That you’re...that you’re useless if you don’t die for me?”
Or maybe not. Damn. 29 looked down at the tea cup, trying to chose his words carefully.
“No sir. Not you specifically.” 29 finally managed. “Jedi in general. We- clones- exist solely to fight for you, to protect you, to defend the Republic. Follow orders. I- I’ve never had an issue with that, believe me, and you’re- you’re nice sir. Really.” 29 hesitated. Stop whining Alpha-29. How can you follow orders if you’re whining?
But he asked! He wants to know! He can help. He’s a Jedi- he can make it go away.
His breath caught in his throat again before he could continue.
“But I can’t follow orders. Not- not when I’m like this. I’m broken and useless because I got sloppy and got shot and I-“ A sound he hadn’t made since Kamino rose up in his throat and 29 cut himself off harshly. “I’m sorry sir.” He said, after a long pause. “I’ve just...it’s been giving me nightmares. I’m sorry to have troubled you.”
Kane looked like he was going to argue again, but 29 didn’t give him a chance. He stood up and handed the tea back to the Jedi.
“You’re right, sir. I should go check in with the medic. I’ll get out of your way.” He sidestepped Kage and was down the hall before he said anything.
-
“So you...ran away. From a Jedi.” Sugar paused, med scanner in hand. “Hey Twenty-nine? What the hell?”
29 groaned and held his arms up so Sugar could scan his torso unobstructed.
“Sugar, I was acting like a three year old on Kamino again.”
“I thought you trusted that one? You said he was one of the good ones.” Sugar grabbed one of 29’ shoulders and forced him to turn. “You said you got sick earlier?”
“I do trust him, but that doesn’t change the fact that whining about something like a bad dream is how you get screwed over.” He groaned and dragged his hands down his face. “Yeah uh- after the first one. I woke up and threw up my rations from last night.”
Sugar paused, his scanner beeping helpfully.
“Well, nothing’s wrong with your gut. No contagens or anything either, so it’s not a virus or infection.”
“Lovely. So I’m sick for no reason.” 29 dragged his hands down it face and Sugar rolled his eyes.
“Well, if there’s no medical reason for it, then you can enjoy these with me.” Sugar put down two cups of something semi-frozen with whipped cream on the counter. 29 laughed.
“Pretty sure that’s not sanitary, kid.”
“Do you want one or not?”
“Hand it over.”
They sat there in silence for a bit, drinking the civvie drinks. 29 barely got two sips into his before he set the disposable cup back down on the counter, his nose crunching up from the amount of sugar in that thing. The medic barely seemed to notice, as he had already downed almost a third of it, and had a glop of whipped cream on his nose to match.
Twenty-nine grinned, despite the tension and dread that had been coiling between his shoulder blades all morning. Sugar was from one of the younger batch cycles, he knew that, but to see the other clone so relaxed and casual…. at first, he would have expected to feel jealous. All the comforts he had, both as a medic at a relatively peaceful outpost and from the lack of scrutiny and constant watch he got as a rank-and-file soldier- 29 would never get those things. But he wasn’t jealous, or upset or even annoyed- it was nice, actually, to stand next to Sugar and just enjoy his company.
His cheeks were softer, 29 noticed with a start as Sugar set aside his own cup and looked to 29’s basically untouched one hopefully.
Fuller, not quite as sharp and angled as 29’. His hair looked softer too- kid probably had time to actually style it into the little half bun he wore, rather than just push it out of his face before slamming a bucket on.
“All your’s.” 29 waved a hand to Sugar who happily snatched up the cup.
“I’ll find a civvie food you like one of these days, Twenty-nine.”
“Yeah, uh-huh- you can keep trying.”
“I think I will.” Sugar looked smug, like a tooka that just swiped a piece of meat off a plate when someone wasn’t looking.
“‘S not gonna work.”
“Have some faith in me!”
“Nope, think I’ll keep all my faith for myself, thanks.”
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aureolusfirewrites · 4 years
Text
So I finally got around to writing a possessed Ben Zs'Skayr story surprised to find I'm actually motivated for once so here it is
Warnings: Brooken, PTSD
This takes place in October even though I'm writing it in February
Veined in Black
Chapter 1
Present Oct. 29/
Ben sat on his bed at plumber headquarters. Groaning and wincing in pain as his crush fussily wrapped bandages around his wounds. 
Once Rook finished patching him up Ben flopped over face first on his bed and moaned. 
"I hate October." The statement was enough to get Rook to look up at him.
"Do humans not generally enjoy this time of year?"
"Well yeah kinda but it's just so freaky to me. People walk around purposely looking like they're hurt and bleeding plus there's a Halloween eclipse which makes it twice as creepy... Not to mention everyone thinks it's an excuse to cause even more crime then normal." Ben ranted.
Rook grunted "I agree with you on that it seems as though the number of emergencies we get called out for have spiked to almost twice the normal amount..." Rook smirked. "However I would've thought you would be more than overjoyed at the aspect of receiving free candy."
Ben smiled at that "yeah free candy is pretty rad..." 
"Ben... Is something the matter?" Rook asked apparently picking up on Ben's distant additude. 
"Did... did anything about that fight earlier seem odd to you?" He thought back to it.
------------------------------
Earlier
He was walking through the mall with Rook and a kid dressed up as a killer clown had gotten a little to close to him and Rook. The anxiety attack was minor so Rook was able to talk him down relatively easy. He could still feel his heart racing a little to fast and Ben started feeling tired. 
Rook shook him lightly to snap him out of his post-anxiety attack daze. Ben look up at him and rubbed his head. "Ben it is alright everyone is still here safe and alive." Rook said gently. "Y-yeah yeah I know I'm good now Rook just... Just tired all of a sudden. 
Rook nodded and they continued their patrol. Well it wasn't so much patrol, as it was walking around the mall looking at Halloween ideas and hoping a bad guy would run into them so they'd have an excuse for doing nothing all day. Wish granted apprently. 
There was a loud commotion below them. Ben immediately jumped off the balcony fully prepared to transform before he hit the ground but Rook had other plans apparently. He felt warm hands wrap around his waist as Rook grabbed hold of him lowering him down on his proto tool's grappling function. Ben blushed glad his partner hadn't been looking at him.
Rook had seen him but that wasn't something Ben was ever going to know. 
He looked around for the danger. There were three humans wearing masks and another three aliens. They seemed relatively younger probably near teenagers by human standards. One was a Thep Khufan another was a loboan and then there was... He froze slightly. Enough for Rook to notice his tension. "It is not him Ben." Rook whispered the small reminder in his ear as he looked at a small ectonurite girl. 
He knew he shouldn't be afraid, he knew that just because one was bad didn't mean they all had similar plans but still. Whenever he was around ectonurites he couldn't help but see him. Pictures flashed through his head, gwen at the edge of a roof, a fight in space on a satellite, running through a city of monsters, Rook attacking him, a chill going through him and then a horrible pain as his body was taken over. 
Rook shook him again and he focused. "Right. Rook you take the humans I'll get the others." His partner nodded and ran for the three humans who immediately bolted in the other direction. Ben stood his ground hand over the omnitrix ready to activate at any moment. They all stood like that for a bit before they made a move. 
There was a long drawn out screech that threw him backwards. He flew back and his head hit something hard. He rubbed the back of his neck "y'know I might've had a concussion from that but at this point I've been hit on the head so much I think I might be immune." He joked to no one in particular. They was some pressure on him middle and he looked down at the bandages that had wrapped around his middle. He smiled up at the mummy sheepishly "oh boy," there was a tug and he got thrown out of the... Fountain? That's what he slammed into? ...That'd work.
He was being whirled through the air uselessly waiting for the right moment and then quickly grabbed onto a pillar as he flew by. 
The whiplash and inurscia from his sudden stop threw the mummy forward. It released it's grip as it was launched into the fountain. Water seeped into the alien's bandages and it began to unravel, water weighing it down. Ben was ready to go help it out of there, he didn't want him getting melted like some paper mache sculpture in the rain but the ectonurite beat him to it. 
The loboan was still an issue though. It lunged at him with sharp claws ready stab him. There was a lucky swipe and Ben staggered away clutching his bleeding arm. 
The loboan smirked and the ectonurite was still helping dry off her friend. Ben slammed his hand down on the omnitrix. 
He felt the familiar pain and tension he always felt when he transformed. Like he told Young One that one time it was like a stretch, except it was your muscles stretching out and changing into something new entirely just fast enough for your body to not go into instant shock. If it was any slower he would've guessed that he would immediately have some kind of seziure or something. 
Something was odd about it this time though like there was something else shifting with him. He shrugged it off.
He felt heavier and stronger but in a more solid way. "Alright! Diamondhead is gonna kick your butts!" He said excitedly. 
The loboan howled and he was less excited as he felt a crack run down his face. "That's enough of that." He said fed up. He sent a few sharp crystals at the sides of the alien and a few blunt ones to his stomach. The sharp ones scraped it's arms and trimmed off the fur where they connected. The blunt projectiles collided with his midsection and sent the loboan to the ground gasping for air. 
Ben winced he knew the blunts were the equivalent to getting a punch to the chest at high speed but it was better than using a shard. 
He brought crystal walls up around the wolf alien to keep him in place until Rook got back but he doubted the loboan was getting up anytime soon. Then there were the other two...
The Thep Khufan was down for now so he wouldn't bother with him so that left... The ectonurite. 
The ectonurite girl was smaller, around his size actually. She had metal bands all around her sort of like clothes so she looked like a kindergartner covered in a ton of slap bracelets. 
The omnitrix suddenly started flashing and toning the timeout sequence. "No no no c'mon!" There was a flash and he was back to being a human. 
The ectonurite turned towards him. He felt wobbly 'run' kept going through his head but his body wasn't responding. Then at lighting speed she launched towards him. A logical part of his mind knew that even if she did get inside him she wouldn't be able to take him over, but that wasn't the part controlling him at the moment. 
Ben let out a surprised yelp and covered himself with his arms as a last ditch block effort. But what he was waiting for never came. 
The ghost alien stopped in front of Ben and silently looked him over. She let out a hum of frustration and flew back over to the Thep Khufan. 
Ben stayed staring at her. "BEN!" He heard Rook call and he ran to Ben's side. Ben raised his arm up to motion that he was okay to Rook but a pain shot across and he looked down at his still bleeding still injured arm. "Oh... Right... That-" and then Ben had passed out and Rook carried him back to the proto-truk.
Ben had woken up about 10 minutes later in the passenger seat slightly dizzy and tired but he hadn't lost enough blood for it to be serious so Rook was taking him back to his dorm room to patch him up.
Ben couldn't help but feel like something was off though...
---------------------------------------------------
/Present, Oct. 29/
Then it struck Ben what was so odd about that fight. "Rook what were they doing there?" Rook looked away in thought. "We are unsure. The ectonurite refuses to talk and the other two act as if they have no memory of the event." 
Ben mumbled a little.
"So three anur system aliens attack with no motive and didn't speak once while fighting..." He said quietly. 
"What are you thinking Ben-dude?" Rook smiled trying to cheer Ben up. 
Slight pink flushed across Ben's smiling face but the expression faded fast into his 'Im connecting the dots' face. "I dunno Rook just a hunch." His partner nodded. 
Ben felt like his eyelids were made of lead suddenly and he yawned wide. "Why do you not get some rest for right now Ben" Rook smiled at the tired hero. "Mmm'kay" Ben slurred before letting black wash over his mind.
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animeniacss · 5 years
Text
What I Want - BadBoy! Taehyung x Reader - Chapter 15 - Those Three Words
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Synopsis:  You are an innocent, excitable new girl, moving all the way to Korea due to your dad’s new job. As you anxiously learn about the new world around you and how you’ll make your mark, you stumble into none other than bad boy Kim Taehyung and his band of six crazy friends. He seems to be bothered but you, something he doesn’t even understand. Will you be able to tolerate the shenanigans of Taehyung and his rowdy friends, or will you fall victim to his charms just like everyone else?
Featuring Jihyo and Dahyun (TWICE) as your friends, and BTS members as Taehyung’s group of friends.
Genre: Romance, BadBoy!V, BadBoy!BTS, High School Romance, Drama
Length: approx. 4.7k words
Chapter 15 - Those Three Words
Since your headache was not getting any better when you woke up from your nap, your mother offered to come and pick you up from school so you could rest at home with little to no distraction. You felt bad, inconveniencing the nurse and Professor Im, and just kept telling yourself that you should have just stayed home another day. You were excused from the nurse with a message to get well, before making your way back to class to grab your stuff. It was lunchtime by now, and you stepped into class, rubbing your head as you closed the door behind you. Taehyung wasn’t there, neither was Jimin, so you assumed they met with the others for lunch again, but Jihyo was there with some friends. When she saw you, she hurried over to your side.
           “How do you feel?” she asked.
           “My head hurts. My mother is coming to get me so I can go home and rest.” You walked to your desk and grabbed your bag, then to your locker in the back of the class to switch out books. “Can you bring me the rest of my work later?”
           “Of course.” She smiled. “Just go home and rest, okay? Do the teachers know?”
           “The nurse said she would call the teacher’s lounge and tell them to me.” As you closed your locker, you sighed. “I guess I’ll go wait outside.”
           “See you tomorrow?” Jihyo asked. You nodded.
           “Yeah. Hopefully, I’ll feel up to it. I didn’t realize how hard my head hit the wall when Ji Seok and I crossed paths. I’ve had concussions before, nothing this serious.”
           “You’re dealing with a psychopath, that’s why,” Jihyo said. “But hopefully you’ll be okay soon. Maybe go to the doctor again.”
           “Yeah, I’ll probably do that.” You gave Jihyo a hug. “Tell Taehyung not to worry about me too much, okay? I’ll text him after school if I’m not asleep.”
           “Okay.” She watched you head towards the door and out of class again.    
           It was cold outside, so the boys were eating lunch together in an old tech room nobody used anymore after they upgraded all of their equipment last year.
“Did she looks any better when you saw her, Taehyung?” Namjoon asked as he leaned back in his seat.
“She was asleep. I couldn’t really tell.” He responded, leaning over to Jungkook and using his chopsticks to nab some of his rice. Jungkook huffed, moving his food away from Taehyung’s grasp as he continued to eat it protectively.
“Why don’t you bring your own food?” he asked.
“I don’t have anything in my house to bring.” Taehyung responded, swallowing the handful of rice. “What I got in the cafeteria wasn’t enough for me today, I’m still hungry. Just one more bite?” he pouted at his younger friend, who knew he wouldn’t say no. He was probably the best behaved and kindest out of the seven of them, which he mostly got from Hoseok. Jungkook sighed, pushing his lunch towards Taehyung, who took some more rice.
“Just don’t eat everything.” He said as he watched his friend.
Taehyung was putting a mouthful of rice in his mouth when he glanced out the window and saw you standing by the front gates, bundled up in your jacket, pulling your hood over your head. He set his chopsticks down and stood up, peering closer out the window to make sure it was you. When he confirmed that it was, he pushed his seat in. “I’ll be right back.” He said.
“We’re are you going?” Hoseok asked, only to be nudged and pointed towards the window by Yoongi. “Oh.”
Taehyung hurried out of the school and towards the gate, calling your name. You looked over, smiling a bit as you fixed your scarf around your neck. “Hey. What are you doing out here?”        
“I’m waiting for my mom. My head was still bothering me when I woke up, so she’s coming to get me and probably take me to the doctor.”
“Oh…” Taehyung’s shoulders slumped. You stepped closer to him and poked them hard enough to make him stand straight again. “Well…can I stop by after school then?” You nodded.
“I’d like that.” You replied, hearing a car come down the street. You got on your tiptoes and planted a kiss on Taehyung’s cheek. He smiled a bit, putting a hand in his pocket as your mother rolled down the window of the driver’s seat. She called your name. “I’ll see you later, okay?” He nodded, waving you off as he watched your get in the car. Your mother waved to him as you buckled up, and she drove off down the street. Taehyung sighed, running a hand through his hair. He turned to head in the school just as a teacher on the second floor lifted up a window and called out to him. It was Professor Im.  
“MR. KIM GET BACK INSIDE NOW! YOU SHOULDN’T BE OUT OF THE BUILDING!” Taehyung waved his hand, restraining himself from flipping the guy off as he disappeared back into the building.
Things seemed to die down after you recovered from your concussion. It took another day of staying home, and medicine from the doctor, but by Friday, you felt as if nothing had happened. You could focus in lit rooms, watch TV, and while you were still getting a few headaches throughout the few days, they were no longer debilitating. You hadn’t seen or heard from Ji Seok or Hyuna since your encounter with him in the alleyway, and you were hoping to keep it that way. Without them around, time passed much faster and you were much happier.
As winter welcomed the New Year, and the cold air turned warmer, spring was just barely poking its head out in mid-March. It was much needed, no heavier jackets or puffy scarves to constrict you as you moved, no more chilly nights bundled under three or four blankets with a heater in your room, no more snowy days and shivering nights. Spring was finally coming, and you were damn grateful.
That also meant you were coming up on your three month anniversary with Taehyung, and it went by so quick you had no idea it had even been three months. Over that time, Taehyung and his friends had begun consistently going to class, and the four oldest boys were starting to prepare to graduate. Jungkook was excited to be a second year, but the three youngest had no idea what they would do when their Hyung’s were not in school next year. It seemed to bother Taehyung the most, and that was obvious one day when you both were sitting in your room doing homework.
It was a cool March afternoon, the two of you had just gone out for some lunch at a nice little café near your house. Back at home, you were sitting on your bed, writing in your notebook the seventh out of twenty-six questions from Professor Im on a book you didn’t really care for. It was long and boring and even you found yourself struggling with it. You glanced down at Taehyung, who was sitting on the floor, the same assignment in hands. You poked the top of his head and he glanced up at you.
“How you doing?” you asked. “I’m only on question 7.”
“…Fine…” he said, glancing back down at the paper. You frowned a bit, poking him again. “What?” He asked, glancing back up at you with an annoyed expression.
“You okay?” You asked. “After lunch, you seemed to start acting a bit off. Did the food not agree with you?”
“No it’s not that…”
“Then what?” You asked, closing your book. When Taehyung didn’t answer, you crawled off your bed and to him. Taking his books, you set them aside and nuzzled yourself by his lap. He chuckled as you took his arms, wrapping them around your waist while your own wrapped around him, and you pulled him into a tight hug. “You know you can tell me, right?” Taehyung gave your waist a little squeeze, nodding.
“Yeah.” He said. “I know.” As you made yourself comfortable in his lap, he picked up his phone and scrolled through it. He pulled up the group chat he and his friends had and scrolled up a bit.
Jin-Hyung: Namjoon, how are you doing studying for those entrance exams? (Sent 1:45p.m.)
Namjoon-Hyung: Fine. Why do you need help? (Sent 1:47p.m.)
Jin-Hyung: Just on a few problems. (Sent 1:49p.m.)
Hobi-Hyung: Yoongi and I are meeting up to study if you want to join us. (Sent 1:52 p.m.)
Yoongi-Hyung: He said I don’t have a choice -.- (Sent 1:54p.m.)
Namjoon-Hyung: Sure! I’ll be there! (Sent 1:55p.m.)
Jin-Hyung: Me too! Me too! (Sent 1:57p.m.)
You glanced up at him as he scrolled down a bit, revealing that Jungkook and Jimin had also begun to reply.
Kookie: Good luck, Hyungs! Fighting! >.< (Sent 2:15 p.m.)
Jimin: When are those tests, again? (Sent 2:20 p.m.)
Namjoon-Hyung: Around May I think, so we might as well start preparing now. (Sent 2:23p.m.)
“They’re all really serious about their exams.” He said.
“That’s good.” You smiled. “They’re all going to do great if they keep this attitude!” You looked back at Taehyung and saw him frowning. “Tae…what’s wrong?” you asked curiously. “Are you not happy for them?”
“I am it’s just…” he lolled his head back onto the bed. “It won’t be the same when they’re away at college.”
“I know. But you’ll still get to see them. Plus Jimin and Jungkook will still be here.” You said, hoping that would encourage him. It didn’t seem to work.
“Namjoon-Hyung said he wanted to go to a college abroad.” He mumbled. “Jin-Hyung is talking about going for his masters….” He sighed. “Everything changed so fast with them. Here I am…still the same.” You took his hands.
“No you’re not the same. Think back to the person you were when we first met, you’re not the same anymore. You’ve improved so much, you all have.” You smiled sweetly. “You’re becoming better people.” Taehyung smiled.
“I just keep thinking about what I’ll do if I do end up graduating, I still have no idea. Jin-Hyung had to repeat a grade in middle school, that’s why he’s older than us. I wonder if I’ll end up that way…” You shook your head. “It’s frustrating to think about.”
“I don’t think you will. Don’t think so negative. You’ll graduate with me and Jimin, and Dahyun and Jihyo and then that’s it.” You smiled. “We’ll all be off on new and exciting adventures.” Taehyung sighed, lowering his head to rest against your own, and you nuzzled yourself closer to him, both of your hands interlocked together. “Even if you did, and I’m talking worst-case scenario, you’d still have Jungkook.”
“I guess.” He smiled, planting a gentle kiss on your head. “Life sucks.”
“Tell me about it.” You said, and the two of you giggled. “But at least we have each other. That way it sucks a little less.”
“That’s true.” He said. “Makes it a bit more tolerable.” You felt Taehyung’s free hand glide across your arm, and you hummed softly. It was nice, the two of you just sitting here together at this moment. Nothing else really mattered, not even the homework you had stopped doing.
“I keep thinking…” you said after a few moments of silence. “I keep thinking about how much trouble you were when I first moved here. Getting in fights, cutting class, smoking…”
“To be fair, I still smoke.”
“Yeah, I know.” You rolled your eyes. “But you’re nicer to people now, and you’re going to class and actively listening. I never thought when you and I met that I would be able to do it to you, let alone get your friends to do it too. I was so happy when the others said they would go for their entrance exams in the spring.” You rested against Taehyung’s chest. “I always knew none of you were bad people, just misguided.”
“Didn’t you say you used to help new kids at your school too?” he asked. You nodded. “Makes sense.” He nuzzled you. “I wonder where we’d still be had you not interrupted our lives.”
“Probably all smoking out behind the school and avoiding your duty as high school students, that’s what you’d be doing.” Taehyung laughed a bit.
“Yeah, probably.”
“I’m glad you don’t really do that anymore.”
“I guess.”
“Are you not?”
“I miss it sometimes. But everyone seems just as happy now so…I can’t really say I’m angry or anything. I just miss it.” You nodded in understanding. “I just…” he sighed. “When my Hyung’s finally graduate, there’s going to be so much I miss. We won’t see each other as often, especially if Namjoon-Hyung does go abroad. I kinda hope he doesn’t.”
“Well, we’ll all cross that bridge when we come to it. Besides, we still have the rest of this year and the summer to spend together.” Taehyung nodded, and you rubbed your fingers over his hands a bit, glancing down at them.
“What are you doing?” He asked.
“You just have soft hands. I’ve always thought so.” Taehyung smiled a bit, shifting his hands to bring them up to your cheeks. He gently turned you to face him and leaned in to kiss you gently. You hoisted yourself up just a bit, your hands covering his as much as they could due to the size difference as you kissed him back. You smiled when the two of you pulled away just slightly for air, and you looked at him. Taehyung saw your ears turn red a bit as you looked at him.
           Then, he heard it.
           “….I love you, Taehyung.” You said softly. Taehyung blinked, and he felt his cheeks, ears, and neck get hot. He felt as if everything stopped at that moment, and he just looked at you with a bit of a stunned expression on his face.
           “…H-huh?” he asked. You dropped your hands, looking just as surprised at his comment as he looked to yours. “Really?” his eyes darted away, towards your desk, towards the wall, just away from you, thinking that would hide how embarrassed and put off he was. You lowered yourself to sitting position, your legs under your bottom, as you looked up at him. He glanced at you. “Huh…” It made you smile, but he noticed immediately how sad you looked.
           “You don’t have to say it back if you’re not ready,” you said gently, moving off his lap. “I just wanted to tell you.”
           “No, it’s not that…” Taehyung watched you grab your stuff and bring it down beside him, sitting close as you opened your book. He sighed your name gently, putting a hand in your hair as he kissed your temple. It made you smile. “It just took me off guard, that’s all. I-“
           “Don’t say it if you’re not ready. I want you to mean it, okay?” You glanced up at him. “It’ll hurt more if you just say it to make me happy…” Hearing you say that made a wave of guilt wash over him and he looked away, opening his book.
           “Sorry.”
           “Don’t be sorry, I probably took you by surprise anyway.” You responded. “Let’s just get this work done. Maybe we can watch a movie if we have enough time.” Taehyung nodded, and the two of you began to work. “Now, what did you put for number eight?” you asked.
           Hearing you say to him that you loved him put his whole body and mind off track the rest of the day. You both managed to finish your work, sure, but his mind was swimming. Did he love you? Of course, he did, but how was he supposed to say it? He never had been in a relationship where he loved someone before, what does being in love feel like? He loved his friends, but he knew that was a different kind of love. He used to love his family, but that kind of love sizzled and burned away after the first punch from his father at 11 years old. So…what was love? How was he supposed to know when he was truly in love?
           But at the same time…hearing you say it to him…well it made him so happy. If he wasn’t as emotionally jaded as he was, he probably would have started to cry. The thoughts in his mind lasted until it was time for him to go home after dinner had long ended and you and your brother were tired and ready for bed.
           “I’ll see you at school Monday.” You said to him as you stood by the door. Taehyung scratched his head, nodding.
           “Uh-Huh.” You smiled at him, poking him in the stomach. “Hey.”
           “I told you not to think about what I said too seriously.” She said. “When you’re ready, you say it…”
           “Yeah but don’t all girls want to be told that they’re loved right back?” he asked.
           “Of course they do.” You responded. “It took me by surprise but…” you shrugged. “What am I supposed to do? Force you to say it if you don’t mean it?”
           “It’s not that I wouldn’t mean it, I just-“ you lifted a hand to stop him.
           “I know.” You said, biting your lip a bit. “I know…” You got up on your tiptoes to give him a quick peck. “I’ll see you Monday.”
           “Yeah…” he said, and you closed the door with a final goodnight. Taehyung stood there for a moment, sighing. Suddenly, he whipped his phone out and rushing down the street. He pulled up the group chat and sent a message:
           Meet me at Jin-Hyung’s house, God damn it! (Sent 7:45 p.m.)
           The group met at Jin’s house when Taehyung requested. They were honestly a bit worried something serious had happened, so they rushed over, the oldest four stopping their studying immediately to get there. They arrived at the apartment to see Taehyung pacing outside the door. They went inside and Taehyung explained everything.
           “….We stopped what we were doing…” Jimin began.
“Panicked and rushed over here…” Jin added.
“…..Because she told you she loved you?” Namjoon finished. Taehyung was standing in front of his friends, blinking.
“….YES!” He said. “Why are you acting like this isn’t that big a deal?!”
“….I’m going to kill you.” Yoongi glared, only to be nudged by Hoseok.
“You guys didn’t see how sad she looked when I replied.”
“Well…what did you say?” Jungkook asked, fiddling with his fingernails.
“…I think I just said ‘Huh?’” Taehyung said. The boys immediately all began to laugh. “Wha- It’s not funny!” He shouted. “Why are you laughing?!”
“You replied with ‘Huh?’ Oh my God, that’s too funny.” Namjoon said, covering his mouth a bit as he laughed.
“I’d be sad too if that were me!” Jimin said, he and Jungkook holding onto each other as they laughed in hysterics. Taehyung watched them and huffed.
“You guys are a bunch of assholes sometimes, you know that?!” He asked.
“We’re only kidding.” Jin said, wiping his eyes. “Relax, relax. What did she say after you replied with-“ he snorted. “-‘Huh?’” The other boys stopped laughing, but when Jin repeated it, they began again and Jin had to silence them.
“…She told me not to rush and I didn’t have to say it until I meant it…” He said. “But I know that was just to make me feel better, she looked so disappointed.” He sighed, scratching his head. "I didn’t think it’d be this big of a thing until she said it. It’s not that I wouldn’t mean it, I just…well, I don’t know.” He squatted down and pursed his lips together, groaning. “I hate dating.”
“No you don’t.” Hoseok said, throwing a pillow at him. “Now relax. Let’s go out and get some dinner, take your mind off of it for now.”
“Will you pay, Hyung?” Jungkook asked as everyone stood up.
“I got it.” Jin said, pulling out his wallet. “I have to look after my little brothers now don’t I?” He grinned playfully. “Yoongi gets to tip though.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Yoongi waved his head. Taehyung stood up, feeling Jimin throw his arm around him as they headed out the door. The group made their way to a nice BBQ restaurant near Jungkook’s house that he was always talking about, and they all had a great meal. Taehyung had to admit, it definitely helped him get his mind off the whole “I love you” thing for now. It was nice, getting to sit with his best friends over some good food and just talk. He knew these moments may be limited now, come the new school year, so he wanted to enjoy them while he could. The group stayed out until about 11p.m. before Namjoon was craving a smoke and they went into a nearby park to all smoke before catching the last trains to their respective homes. Taehyung rested against a tree, puffing cigarette smoke into the spring air as he looked at his friends.
“Thanks for dinner. It helped.” He said.
“Good. You shouldn’t take these inconveniences so seriously, it’s not that deep.” Jin said. “I’m sure she knows you love her.”
“Yeah, so no more making us think you killed a man or something. Make sure you only bother your Hyungs for something serious, okay?” Yoongi asked, leaning towards Hoseok to help light him another cigarette.
“Aww, Yoongi, cut him a break. It’s serious to him.” Hoseok smiled. As the group continued to chatter, they heard footsteps approaching. Thinking it was a cop coming to see where all the smoke and noise was coming from, the group quickly stomped out their cigarettes and tossed them in the trash. But the figure, it turned out, was the exact opposite of a cop. Ji Seok.
“….Well look who I have the fortune of running into.” Ji Seok sneered, glaring at the group. Taehyung hadn’t seen Ji Seok since he attacked you, and once he laid eyes on him, the memories surged and he became angry. Very angry. He stood up, but Jimin put a hand on his shoulder before he could walk over.
“Can we help you?” Jin asked.
“Just passing through.” Ji Seok said. He glanced at Taehyung. “How’s your girlfriend?” he smirked. “Heard she gets headaches just thinking about me now. Guess I have that kind of charm, huh?” Taehyung took a deep breath but kept calm, clutching his hands into fists.
“Don’t talk about her.” He said simply. “You’re lucky I don’t rip your arms off for what you did to her.”
“What I did?” he asked. He stepped closer. Taehyung immediately did as well, despite the others telling him to stay back. “I didn’t do anything…” he smirked. “Your little friends interrupted us before I could.”
“You’re disgusting.” Ji Seok shrugged.
“I heard you and your friends are preparing for entrance exams and school work.” He said. “Don’t tell me that little bitch made you all soft.”
“Don’t talk about her that way, Ji Seok.” Jungkook said, but Namjoon quickly told him to stop. Ji Seok glared at the youngest member before his eyes fell back to Taehyung. He could see the anger in his eyes.
“Ah, you haven’t really changed. I can see it.” He poked Taehyung’s chest. “You’re so angry. You want to punch me so bad. What? You playing the role of the good, helpful boyfriend to some pussy bitch so she’ll trust you? So she’ll…give you something?” he smirked. “I knew it from the moment I saw her that she’s nothing more than some girl to use for pleasure.” Taehyung’s fists were shaking as he kept them firmly in his pockets. “Don’t tell me I’m wrong. She’s cute. If I had enough time the last time I saw her, maybe I would have-“
“Do not finish that sentence.” Taehyung snapped. “Or I swear I’ll rip your lips off.”
“Oh jeez…” Hoseok mumbled, he, Yoongi and Namjoon stepping closer. They wanted to be ready to jump in when needed. Ji Seok noticed, but simply took Taehyung by the collar of his shirt. Taehyung grunted a bit, glaring at Ji Seok intensely.
“You’re such a pansy now. I expected you would’ve punched me already.” He said. “Oh well, it’ll make this a lot easier.” He used his other hand to uppercut Taehyung, sending him back and onto the ground. “I still haven’t gotten my revenge for you touching my girlfriend at Christmas.” Taehyung staggered to his feet as he heard footsteps behind him. Without missing a beat, he turned to see his friends approaching. He glared at them.
“Stay back.” He hissed, spitting blood from his mouth. “If this asshole has a death wish, I’ll be sure to give it to him.”
“Taehyung we’re not letting you beat this guy up.” Jimin said.
“Nah, listen to him.” Ji Seok said, swinging another fist to Taehyungs face. “I don’t want to fight anyone else.” Taehyung stood up again and immediately swung a punch back at Ji Seok.
                                                     ----------
“Mom?” you asked, looking at her in the kitchen. You were at home, helping your mom finish up the dishes from dessert and dinner as your brother and father were in the living room. Your brother was teaching your father how to play his favorite racing game, but your father seemed to have no idea what to do. You could hear him getting confused, and your brother was cracking up the entire time.
“Yes?” she asked.
“Who said ‘I love you’ first?” You asked. “You or Dad?”
“Well I did.” She said. “We had been dating about…2 to 3 months? I told him on our date to the botanical garden.” You nodded.
“And did he say it right back?” You asked. Your mother set a dish down and looked at you.
“Why do you ask, honey?”
“I just want to know.”
“Well…he was silent for a moment. I guess I surprised him. But, yes, he did.” You nodded, and your grip on the plate you were drying tightened. Your mother set her plate down and turned to you. “He didn’t say it back…did he?”
“No…” you said softly. “I told him today and…he just said ‘Huh? Really?’ I know I probably surprised him but…I didn’t think he would react like that.” Your mother chuckled.
“Honey, don’t worry. Not every couple says I love you right at the same time.” She said.
“But doesn’t that mean he doesn’t…feel that same way? I told him to say it when he’s ready but…what if he isn’t?”
“I doubt that. Taehyung is crazy about you.” She smiled. “I think it just took him off guard. Don’t let it get to you, honey. The way he looks at you, the way he treats you, he loves you with every fiber of his being. From what you’ve shared with me about him…love seems to be something he lacks, something he doesn’t understand. He just needs to learn how to put it into words.”
“You think it’d be so easy.”
“Men aren’t always bright. Your father said it back, yes, but it looked like he was about to throw up when I said it.” You giggled.
“Really?” You both laughed at the image of your father looked truly stunned, something you personally rarely got to see. “Thanks, Mom.”
“Of course.” She leaned over and kissed your hair, patting your back as you both finished up the dishes. When that was done, you headed up to your room after kissing your father goodnight and saying it to your brother, who was still laughing at dad’s poor video game skills. Talking with your mom helped, it always did, so you felt better as you got into bed. You put on some music and closed your eyes as you got to relax.
“Yeah…he ’ll say it when he’s ready.” You mumbled to yourself. “I shouldn’t be so worried.” Just then, you got a phone call. Rolling on your side, you saw a picture of Jungkook pop-up. It was the contact photo of him and you in the school cafeteria, both of you flashing the peace sign. You had a similar contact photo for all of the boys. Raising an eyebrow, you answered. “Hey, Jungkook…what’s wrong?” you asked. You listened to him, and immediately you shot up in bed.
“What do you mean Taehyung’s been arrested?!”
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hold-our-destiny · 5 years
Text
wtf is this
so just got this idea and im writing this straight from my head so sorry if theres any mistakes or anything
its basically just bulletpoints for a story I might end up writing in the future, who knows...
so basically theres a huge fight that the avengers go to, after homecoming and stuff but before infinity war, that kinda time
so the avengers get called out to deal with it, and it gets so serious that Tony ends up calling Peter in to help out
when Peter gets there he finds a massive lizard-type creature attacking the avengers as they try to subdue it.
he gets linked into the comms via Karen and Tony specifically tells him to help out on crowd control
so he helps out as much as he can, he makes sure to check every building for people to make sure they're all out safe.
When he’s sure everyone’s okay, he looks back at the fight still going on, the team is trying their best to take the creature down but it seems to get back up every time, he stays perched up on a rooftop, just making sure everyone’s okay
at one point, most people are down and the creature is about to take a hit on Tony that could be lethal (cause he's gunna smash him into the ground)
so Peter (being the self sacrificial idiot that he is) swings in to distract the monster-thing
Tony has enough time to get back up again and hits the monster straight in the face, it falls backwards, one of its legs (maybe tentacles or smth idk) comes up and hits Peter from where he’s on his web
Basically Peter flies face first into a wall and gets a MAJOR concussion 
The team immediately flyover, apart from the ones who still have to get the creature subdued
bruce runs one of his scan things and they rush Peter to the med bay cause he isn't waking up.
hes in a coma
Tony and may stay by his bed for weeks before he wakes up
when he does, he doesn't remember anything 
but he seriously doesn't remember anything
he doesn't remember anything after the spider bite anyway
as soon as Tony walks in he says “what the heck dude, Tony stark’s here? am I dying or something?”
it takes a while for bruce to tell Peter what happened 
turns out the memory loss is only temporary.
Tony stays with Peter the whole time
the memories come back slowly 
he sees Steve in the halls and nods in his direction, mumbling a small “Brooklyn” 
Steve freezes before running to wherever Tony is and telling him
he ends up remembering everyone in sometimes hilarious ways
Clint falls from the vents and tackles the kid, he tries to get off before finding a spider-kid attached to him. “koala bear” he mumbles into his stomach
its when they're in the lab that he remembers bruce, hes checking on him after a nightly patrol, one of the first ones after the fight when Peter says “you don't have to do this every night dr banner, god knows how many stab wounds you've stitched up already” 
Bruce gives him that surprised look as Peter smirks up at him, hes immediately wrapped up in a hug and neither of them could complain.
it seems after two months of Peter regaining his memory, hes remembered everyone except from Tony (cliche I know)
its one night where he can't sleep that he goes down to the lab and finds Tony at a workbench
“hey mr stark is it okay if I chill out down here for a little bit?”
“yeah sure kid”
so he gets to coding Karen, since he took quite a hit last patrol.
it stays silent for about 20 minutes
before it all goes to shit
Peter jolts back, falls off his seat and onto the floor.
Tony’s immediately on his feet, rushing over to make sure he’s okay.
he finds Peter chuckling on the floor, hands covering his face
“hey kid, you alright?”
Peter sits up and says
“Baby monitor protocol? seriously? I thought me and ned already took that out?”
Tony looks to the floor and back up again, not trying to hope too much
“Stop being so shy with me mr stark”
Tony pulls him forward by his shoulders, burying his face in his curls
“I thought we weren't there yet”
“oh shut up kid”
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callboxkat · 6 years
Text
(Un)Broken - part 1
Author’s note: Hey guys! I’m finally back with the next story in my college AU. I recommend at least reading one of its predecessors, Dazed, before this story. Otherwise you might be confused.
Fandom: Absolutely not a Surprise! It’s Sanders Sides!
Warnings (for this part): doctor visit, talk of injuries (including a head injury and broken arm), medication mention, headaches
Word count: 1254
(Un)Broken Masterpost!
Writing masterpost!
...
March, 2018
“So, Logan, how have your headaches been?”
Logan glanced around the room, with its pale gray walls and aquatic animal themed art. He was sitting on the examination table across from the doctor, tapping his fingers against his leg. He hated medical appointments, but they had been necessarily frequent as of late. It had only been a few weeks since a regrettable and unfortunately infamous incident in which he took a fall down one of the staircases at his college campus. He had come away from it with a concussion, a broken arm, and several bruised ribs.
“About the same,” he admitted after a moment.
“Do you have one now?”
“I do.”
“How would you rate it on a scale from one to ten, one being hardly any pain, and ten being the worst pain imaginable?”
Logan considered. “…Three,” he said. “Four, perhaps.”
The doctor frowned. “Only a four? You’re wearing a baseball cap indoors.”
“My headaches are accompanied by light sensitivity, as you know. This helps to avoid that.”
The doctor glanced up at the lights, which had already been dimmed. Logan set his jaw, disliking the way the doctor had chosen to convey his point.
“I rated the pain at a four because that is what I consider it. You stated that a ten is “the worst pain imaginable”. That is quite a lot of pain. My headache is far from that.”
The doctor nodded, typing something in the computer. “Is the medication I prescribed helping?”
“It’s hard to say just yet, but I believe so.”
He nodded again, typing something else. “Would you like to increase the dose? We can add another ten milligrams if you’d like.”
“I would rather not. I don’t want to become dependent.”
“I respect that.” He turned to face Logan fully, clasping his hands together. He regarded his patient seriously. ‘Although, Mr. Foley, I have to ask—have you considered that these migraines may not be temporary?”
Logan frowned. He had; of course, he had. How could the thought have not occurred to him? He simply had not wanted to consider it as a serious possibility. That denial—he supposed there was no other word for it but denial—seemed to be being put to an end.
“Is there nothing else you can do for me?” he finally asked, his voice slow and careful.
“Head injuries are tricky. There’s a limit to what we can do. It might have helped, had you sought medical attention sooner, but… we can’t change that now.”
Logan gritted his teeth, looking away.
“I’m not trying to criticize. I don’t see the point, especially when it is about something we cannot change.”
Whether criticism was worthwhile here or not, the physician was correct. The delay in Logan’s treatment had greatly affected his recovery, and it was all his own fault. He never should have refused to see a doctor, and he shouldn’t have lied to his friends about hitting his head in the first place. He knew that he had only made things worse for himself, and that he had terrified his friends in the process. Logan could argue that he hadn’t been himself at the time, that he hadn’t been thinking clearly, and while that had probably contributed to his poor decision-making at the time, the inflexible stubbornness of his actions had been all Logan.
“What we can control is how you deal with these headaches.”
“Hm.”
“Should your migraines prove to be a chronic condition, we can work together to figure out a balance of lifestyle changes and medication that works for you to properly manage them. Things like a consistent, healthy sleep schedule, taking frequent breaks from difficult task, and other methods of avoiding triggers and minimizing the duration of your headaches may really help you.”
Logan sighed, looking down at his hands where they sat in his lap. One was partially hidden by the bulky blue cast encasing his right forearm. The watch he usually wore on that wrist was now on his left.
“Would it be acceptable to put this discussion off until our next appointment?” he asked even though he knew that there was still plenty of time left in the appointment slot. “I would prefer to wait and see if there is any more improvement by then.”
The doctor regarded him for a moment before nodding. “In that case, let’s move on. What about your ribs? Are they still giving you trouble?”
“No, they seem much improved. The bruises faded approximately a week ago, and while I do still notice some tenderness, it is only when I have inadvertently bumped or applied pressure to them.”
“So, they are healing well?” the doctor clarified.
“Yes.”
“Excellent. As for your arm, I still believe that we should wait another week to remove the cast. At that point you will receive a removable splint.” He glanced at the clock above Logan’s head. “We can talk more about that when the time comes.”
“Is that all, then?”
“If you have nothing else to discuss.”
Logan affirmed that he had nothing else to say, gathered his phone, water bottle, and jacket, and left the office.
As he drove home, Logan couldn’t help but think about what the doctor had said. He really didn’t like to think about the fact that while his arm and ribs would heal, he might never be rid of these headaches.
To think that a split-second—a broken backpack clasp, a hurried step, a bit of rainwater on a staircase—could cause such a permanent change in his life… it was awful. The thought that he might have what amounted to permanent brain damage, as someone who valued his mind above all else, was rather terrifying.
What if I’m never as smart as I was? he couldn’t help but think. Would I even know?
Logan squeezed the steering wheel tightly with his left hand and kept driving, determined to shift his focus to the task at hand. It wouldn’t do to drive distracted. He couldn’t afford to be in a traffic accident, could he? Not on top of everything else.
Logan huffed bitterly.
He supposed he should count himself lucky. His head injury really hadn’t been that bad, not compared to what it could have been. His fractured arm would be out of a cast very soon, and his ribs had been only bruised. He should be grateful that he hadn’t been hurt worse, and that his friends had cared enough to try to force him to the hospital, although it hadn’t been until that forgotten night in the park that they had succeeded.
Logan pulled into a space in front of his apartment building and turned off the engine. He sat there for a moment in silence before adjusting his sunglasses and opening the door. He walked quickly inside, wanting to be in the bright sunlight as briefly as possible.
He shut himself in the apartment and put away his school materials. His appointment had been scheduled close to when his classes had ended that day, so he hadn’t gotten the chance to come home beforehand. Now, he took off his shoes and hat and lay down on the couch, covering his eyes with his arm. He and his friends were meeting that evening, as they often did, but Logan had time for a nap first. It might help to assuage his headache pain, he reasoned. That way he at least had a chance at enjoying himself that afternoon. Time would tell.
...
Tag list: @patton-loves-coloring @starryfirefliesbloggo @purplesoul-at-hogwarts  @gaylotusthatexists @quoth-the-sparrow @awesomelissawho @amuthefunperson @faithfreedom @heck-im-lost @gayfandomsaremything @bunny222 @syndianites @astraastro @momolinia @captainswan618 @hamilin-manuel-miranda @goldenkiddos @afilhadehades-blog @virgeofselfdestruction @theresneverenoughfandoms @iris-sanders-athena @super-magical-wizard @rainbow-sides @thefallendog @fanficptsd @zodiac-awesome @lookitsthatquietgirl @soft-boy-patton @nerd-in-space @pearls-of-patton @ab-artist @angered-turtle @im-so-infinitesimal @enby-kiddo-with-a-blog @raygelkitty @dr-gloom @whats-going-on-kiddos @spider-parker14 @oh-star-how-the-mighty-fall @fillyourteacup @kittiebrick
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bfire92 · 5 years
Text
Lou Ellen Blackstone - The Torch Bearer
I wrote this on my cellphone while traveling at night, so I appologize for any spelling mistakes and things that might not fit the book. There are three small chapters, inspired by three songs.
Read on FFN
Champion
I'm calling you from the future
To let you know we've made a mistake
There's a fog from the past that's giving me, giving me such a headache
-Fall Out Boy
"Will! Here!"
The voice was far away, like she was under water. It frightened her. Voices shouldn't be dimmed like that. They shouldn't come from people buried under hills of stone and bricks or people who were being swallowed by waves of water from a river.
"Over here! Help!"
  Help. Help them. She had screamed it, wailing in terror and tears. Blood on her hands. Blood on her armor. Blood in her face, in her mouth. She could still taste it and smell it. Warm and metallic.
  Wait, that wasn't a memory, was it?
"What happened? Who is she?"
"Fuck, Will, I just. I was just blowing up some stuff, I was thinking I'd block the street, right, and fuck. Will, fuck, I didn't know she was there. She was hiding."
  Was that blood running down her face? Her head was swimming and she lost all sense of direction. Then, she felt a pressure along her whole body. The ground? A bench?
"Cecil, she is not one of ours."
"Sure she is! She's human, ain't she. Didn't you take some hypocrite oath? Help everyone, or some shit like that."
  There had been skeletons. She had litterally seen the dead walk amongst them. She'd even seen one of them attack a kid, some son of Nike who would just never give up or back down. Too young, they had told him. His sisters had commanded him to go home. Al had even talked to Luke. But he just seemed to find his way back every time. She'd seen him fall to the ground after being smashed in the head. She'd seen him lie still and small on the asphalt. Then some monster had thrown itself towards the body. And she had screamed, because that didn't make sense. That didn't make sense at all. Weren't they on the same side?
"You're right. Of course you're right."
"Damn right I am!"
"Help me cut off her armor. Her head, she'll need stitches."
  Her brother, she'd hear him call for her under the piles of a fallen buildning. He'd screamed for several minutes while they dug. And then he'd gone quiet. Silent. Dead silent. One minute he was screaming her name. The next she'd know she would never hear his voice again.
  From the other side, she could hear a song. A soft voice and warm hands. The voice got louder and clearer, like she was rising in the water. She wanted to sink back down. She wanted to stay there. If she reached the surface, she would have to go back out on the streets, wouldn't she?
  The voice grew clearer. She was just below the surface now. She could feel pain. Pain in her head, in her side.
  Good, she thought. If she was to live, at least she wanted it to be painful.
  It had been a mistake. She knew that now, as she was rising from the water and the fog. But her mother had spoken to Al, and then he had promised them they would win.
  With a gasp, she broke the surface of whatever water she had been drowning in. A rush of air filled her lungs, making her back hurt like she had breathed in cold winter air. But the air here wasn't cold and crisp. It was warm and clammy, carrying the smell of blood and gods knew what else.
"Keep her still. I need to clean and stitch up that headwound." She recognized the voice, calm and tired. The voice of the song that had lured her to the surface.
"What, without anestetics or anything? Fuck, Will, that's cold, man.
  This one was different. It was sharp and demanding. She'd listened to it for a long time. It had carried her when she was drowning. Dragged her through the currents. Hadn't she planned to kill it? She couldn't remember why.
"We are running low on supplies. There are worse injuries." A hand touched her cheek. "Hey, can you hear me? Will you try to look at me?"
  She opened her eyes, but the world went spinning. All she could see was blue and blond and orange. She groaned.
"I need to clean your wound. You have some debrils in it. It might hurt, but you can take it, can't you? You're a proper champion, right?"
  She managed a small nod, but even that made her stomach twist.
"Good. Here we go. Cecil, make sure she lies still."
"Doctor's orders, girl." There was a nervous laughter. Then someone leaned over her, elbows holding her arms pinned against her sides, a chest keeping her from moving her upper body, and hands against either side of her head. It felt suffocating, and parts of her wanted to fight him off, but some other part knew what was going on and teld her to hold still.
  She could feel the tweezers poke around in the flesh along the side of her head, just above her ear. She could straight up hear them scratch against her head and even feel things being pulled out. Tears ran down her face and she couldn't help her legs from twitching and kicking. Everything burned every time alcohol flowed over the wound, and she grit her teeth. Still, she knew, this wasn't really painful. This was nothing against being crushed under gravel or drowned in the river or hit in the head and ripped apart.
  When the voice was done with the needle, the pressure over her chest let her go, and hands started running over her body.
"She has a lot of fractures. A broken finger, broken ribs. No internal bleeding."
"I think she god hit in the head by something from the explosion. But there was so much blood, I thought... You know, she wasn't even moving."
"Headinjuries bleed a lot. I am more worried about the concussion. She has to stay still. We will keep an eye on her. Perhaps..."
"Tie her up?"
  Silence.
"Yeah. You good with knots?"
"Knots, locks, same thing, really. I will make sure she stays in place."
"Good. Hey?" A warm hand on cheek again. "Are you with us? What's your name?"
  Her head was still swimming, but she dared open her eyes. Two boys were sitting on the floor by her side. Both were grimy and tired. Their clothes had spots of dried and fresh blood. Her blood? One wore an armor in scratched up bronze.
  They had asked her a question. She gave it some thought. Not because she worried about the consequenses of telling them anything, but because the information had to be collected from the depths of the waters she had just surfaced from.
"Lou," she whispered. Her voice was hoarce and unfamiliar, a broken voice of someone much older than herself. "Lou Ellen Blackstone."
Kids In The Dark
Here we are at the top of the hill
A hill that's quietly crumbling
Been a while since you dressed for the kill
The kill that sent me tumbling
Looking up, I see a falling star
And watch its fire burn into the floor
And I am left standing on the edge
Wondering why we fall so hard, why we fall so hard
-All Time Low
Lou Ellen lifted the last of the bags out of the van and handed it to one of her younger brothers. He whinced as he grabbed it, but hoisted it onto his back.
"Are you sure you don't want me to carry it for you? Your arm hasn't healed yet."
  But he shook his head and mumbled something under his breath before he shuffled off.
She watched him warily as he joined the others, before she picked up her own small shoulder bag and walked around the van.
  Alabaster was leaning against the hood, waiting for her with his arms crossed and a frown on his face.
"Theo should let his arm rest," he said and nodded towards their brother. "Make sure someone from the Apollo cabin has a look at it, would you?"
"I know just the guy," Lou Ellen said. Alabaster huffed, but didn't say anything. They both knew that if they picked up that discussion again, they would end up arguing, and Lou Ellen would prefer to avoid that for once.
  There had been too many harsh words the past month, ever since Manhattan. Ever since she was wounded, and Cecil found her and took her to their makeshift infermary. Ever since they lost and she voted for a truce. Ever since she was chosen to represent the children of Hecate when Alabaster was deamed "too influental, too corrupted".
  Ever since they realized they would never come to an agreement. And now, there was no time left to do any more attempts. They would just have to agree to disagree.
  Her throat tightened.
"You'll IM us, right?" she asked. "Keep us updated on how you are doing?"
Alabaster glared at his shoes.
"You know I can't."
"We could write?"
"Lou..."
"Just an adress, so I can visit?"
"Stop!"
    Even the other kids stopped talking and looked up. One reassuring nod from Alabaster, and they all turned their attention back to their quiet conversation. It made her sigh.
"They will never trust me like they trust you," Lou Ellen whispered, and regretted it just as she said it. It was a thought that had kept her awake for weeks, but speaking it out loud made it so much more true. As a child of Hecate, she was very aware of the power words held.
"Give them time," Alabaster said softly, without any sign of malice. "You were second in command, everyone knows you are a great leader. They are just worried about what awaits them at camp. Most of them have never even been here, they were left alone in the dark to fend for themselves."
  The phracing made Lou Ellen frown.
"Al?"
"You have spark, Lou. That is why you are a leader. You light up that same spark in others." He stood and tapped his thighs. "I actually have something for you. Hold on."
  He opened the door on the driver's side and Lou Ellen could hear him search for something in his backpack. When he came back around, he was holding an unlit torch.
"I know you love puns, Lou. So..." Alabaster coughed, just loud enough to get their siblings attention.
"Lou Ellen, I am handing over the torch to you."
  She wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry as Alabaster took her hand in his and placed it around the wood. "I trust you. I trust you will look after our brothers and sisters. And..." he stared at her, his green eyes serious and steely, "I trust you will honor those we have lost."
  She made sure not to blink as she nodded. "I will."
  Finally, Alabaster looked away. He made an honorable attempt to smile as he held out his arms towards the others.
"One last hug before I am off, guys?"
  The way he said it made it sound like he was just off on holiday, but it didn't fool anyone. Lou Ellen stepped back and watched as every single one of her siblings hugged him and then tried to dry away the tears from their cheeks. Alabaster whispered friendly messages and made sure every rib got properly fractured. When everyone else had said their goodbyes, Lou Ellen threw her arms around him and tried to achieve some kind of closure by hugging the last of her feelings out of her body. He whispered one last command to her, too low for anyone else to hear.
"Do not forget anyone, got it? Dead or alive."
  Then he gently pushed her away, and without making eyecontact with anyone, he went straight for the van.
  They watched as it disapeared in the dark. When the fainth sound of the engine got swallowed by the wind in the trees, Lou Ellen drew a couple of deep breaths. Her throat was still tight and her eyes stung, but her cheeks were dry. Once she spoke, she was content to hear that her voice was steady and light.
"Okay then. Off we go."
  She spoke an incantation and the torch lit up with a bright, orange flame.
  Her siblings picked up their bags and backpacks. Two of them kept their arms around each other and sniffed. Then they followed as she led the way down the hill.
Mineshaft
The list of things I used to be is longer than the list of things I am
Ex-lover, ex-friend
Ex-communicated atheist and an ex-patriot
Living in the heartland
Living on the small chance
Luck would save the last dance
-Dessa
There were no clouds to hide the stars, but the thin cresent moon didn't give her much light. It didn't matter, though. The torch in her hand burned as bightly as it had that night she had lead her siblings to camp a year and a half ago. It felt right to light it up again tonight. As if she was leading more brothers and sisters home. It gave her a flash of deja-vu, a feeling that she should know what was to happen next.
  Lou Ellen had assumed the campfire would be cold coal and stubborn everlasting embers, but it burned as strong and warm as it had when they had left it earlier that night. Her own torch suddenly seemed small next to it, and with just a flick of her hand and a commanding word, it went out.
  The fire invited her forward and reminded her of a home she had once had, but lost, and of people who should have been here with her, but who too had been lost.
  People she thought about every day, but it wasn't until tonight that she dared ask about them. She was afraid of what answers she might get. With the Grove of Dodona close by, asking questions didn't feel too safe, even with the chimes she knew played an improvised melody of prophecies. It had basically kidnapped Cecil earlier this year, and ever since, she had hosted what she believed was a healthy scepticism towards it.
  But she had come to discover other ways to ask. She felt ready now, with Mirandas words still echoing in her head and beconing her forward.
  Lou Ellen reached out her hand over the hot flames. It stang, but then words emerged on the back of her hand, written in glowing cursive of embers. The burning sensation stopped, and she lowered her hand further before closing her eyes. She started chanting a long verse in ancient Greek. A command and a plea, for her mother Hecate, the carrier of the torches. For Hestia, who tended the flame sometimes used as a funeral pyre. For Hades, who kept the souls who had lived for a moment and stayed dead for eternity.
  She could feel the currents of the mist around her, curiously attracted to the strong magic. Her hands felt prickly and heavy with it. Time became as flowing and fleeting as water and mist. Had she finished her verse and started all over again? Or had she just begun? In her chest, she felt a tug. A summoning. Like pulling on a rope that dissapeared into the darkness of a well, waiting to see the dim outline of the bucket in the depths.
A noise behind her made her jump and she broke off her chanting. She turned, the magic she had summoned still stirring in her hands and chest.
  At first, she thought the intruder was a stranger. The mist tightened around her, shaping her apperance to make her look more terryfying - tall, fit, strong, and with a glow in her eyes that once had made enemies cringe as she stared them down.
  Then, he spoke.
"Nice trick, Lou, but you do not fool me. Those pink sweatpants are not exactly frightening. Your behind litterally says CUTIE."
"Nico?" Even to her own ears, her voice was unfamiliar and deep, a husky growl. She allowed the mist to drift away from her like cold waves.
  It was no surprise that she hadn't recognized him. Underneath the usual black bomber jacket, he wore an over-sized orange tee and a pair of grey plated pyjamas pants. The back of his hair stuck out in an odd angle, as if he had gone to bed with wet hair and forgot to brush it. In the dim and flickering light, he looked like a bad charicature of himself. Almost a perfect replica, but slightly off.
  In an attempt to regain controll of the situation, she put on her best smirk, the one that would be worthy of a child of Hermes.
"You are the one to talk. Are you testing out a new look? I must say, it does not suit you."
"Very funny," he huffed. "Your spell woke me up."
  That took her off guard.
"It... did?" Then he knew what she had attempted?
  He shrugged and walked up to her to stand by the fire.
"What did you expect? You wanted information about the dead, didn't you? Well, here I am."
  When she didn't react, he rubbed his eyes, before explaining with a softer voice.
"You asked for a way to find out what happened to the souls of the dead demigods who fought under Kronos. I suppose it worked. It woke me up and pulled me here. You can talk to me."
  It wasn't that she hadn't considered it. Ever since Nico had returned last summer, the question had simmered in the surface of her mind every time he was around. It was something about his aura that made memories of her dead siblings more vivid. If she sat next to him by the campfire before bedtime, she would dream of them. Usually, she would dream of things that made her happy. She would remember their smiles. The little quirks and ticks. Whole conversations they once had.
  Sometimes, though, she would have nightmares. A distant cry for help deep down under gravel and bricks. The weight of a sister wrapped in a shawl, whom she had carried to the funeral pyre last summer. And worse, so much worse, screams from down below the earth, beyond her reach.
  Maybe she was a masochist, but she often tried to stay close to Nico before bed. There were so many she hadn't been able to save. The least she could do was to dream about them and keep their memory alive.
  Lou Ellen stared into the flames.
"Miranda said some things today. It made me think," she said, feeling she had to explain why she was here only now. "Things got a bit... heated. She said she was sorry, she really was, but a lot of it was true. Me, my brothers and sisters, we did fight on the losing side. We fought you. We fought to kill."
  She looked at him from the corner of her eye. In contrast to the dancing light of the flames, were shaddows that lingered and clinged to him wherever they could find refuge. It made his face seem hollow, and reminded her of the skull shaped helmet he had worn when she first saw him. When he was just another nameless demigod to attack and preferably wound.
"I would have killed you, given the chance. If i couldn't wound you, I would rather see you dead than alive."
  Nico nodded.
"Likewise."
"What would Hades do to me, if I had slaughtered his only child. Even if it was to stop you from killing one of my friends or siblings." It wasn't a question, and they both knew. Instead, they watched the flames flicker and embers rise from the fire.
 Right here, a year ago, she had seen the remaints of her sister been devoured by warm fire. Had she been redeamed? Lou Ellen remembered how she had cried every night for a month after Manhattan, because she had killed an other demigod. After they came to camp, she had found out who he was. She had devoted so much time to find out everything about the unclaimed boy from the Hermes cabin, she began mumbeling his name in her sleep. When the Romans surrounded camp, she'd taken to scream it, until Will made Lou Ellen cook a sleeping potion that would make her sleep without dreams.
  Did she ever meet him in the underworld? Had she been given the possibility to tell him how sorry she was? Had he forgiven her?
"I will see what I can do for them," Nico evetually said, his eyes still on the fire. "Spring is coming. Hades is not very... diplomatic in spring. But I will do what I can."
  Her eyes stung, and she was pretty sure it wasn't from campfire smoke.
"Nico?"
"They have not gone to the fields of punishment. Their souls partly belong to Aries, as they are victims of war on the losing side. He would not want his souls to be tortured. It would make them too weak to fight. Maybe I can have them reincarnated, if Aries and Hades would allow it."
  Her breath felt shaky, and she hurried to summon the mist to her. It caressed Lou Ellen's cheeks with cold touches, hiding her tears and the sound of her sobs. If Nico knew, he didn't say anything, but let her have the silence to herself.
  After a couple of minutes, the tears stopped running and though her throat still felt thick and tight and her eyes still stung, she allowed the mist to drift away.
"Thank you," she whispered, her voice hoarce and raspy.
"It is the least I ca-"
  She embrazed him and squeezed him tight, allowing him to take his time to relax. It took five heartbeats for him to hug her back, and she didn't let go until she had counted another seven. He didn't look directly at her, but scratched his nose awkwardly.
"You should probably try to get some sleep, Lou. I'll talk to Chiron in the morning about leaving for the Underworld for a few days."
"Yeah," she said, smiling tiredly, and turned to go. When he didn't follow, she stopped and looked back at him.
"You not coming?"
  He shrugged.
"There are other friends I want to talk to now that I am here anyway. Just go ahead." Nico sat down by the fire. "See you tomorrow."
"Okay." She looked around, but there were no one else but them. But she supposed Nico knew more about presents in the darkness than she did. "I manipulated the mist to fool the harpies, but it probably won't last for more than an hour. Try not to get eaten, di Angelo." After a few steps, she stopped again and grinned at Nico. "Oh, and Nico, by the way. I totally recognize the smell of Will's deodorant on that shirt."
"Oh, shut up, Blackstone," was his only comment, but as she walked back to the cabin, she was sure she could hear Nico talk to himself by the hearthfire.
  That night, Lou Ellen dreamt of her siblings, even more vividly than she had ever done before. She dreamt of joyful memories, things that had happened long ago. When she woke the next morning, the memories still lingered in her mind.
~•°•~•°•~
Champion - Fall Out Boy
Kids In The Dark - All Time Low
Mineshaft - Dessa
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mimikyufriend-moved · 6 years
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I don’t like the title but I couldn’t think of anything... also I can only write short stuff apparently
https://archiveofourown.org/works/18112607
(if you don’t like ao3, understandable, here it is under the cut as well)
“Arataka” Serizawa said with a somewhat accusatory tone. He sat up in the hospital bed he’d been laying on. He had suffered a concussion from Rusty, the spirit he’d tried to save Tome from. It wasn’t too bad, but the doctor wanted him to stay overnight for observation. Tome and Mob had been by earlier, but had gone home when it started getting late. Reigen had changed out of his suit into something more comfortable and was making a bed on the couch in the corner of the hospital room.
“Uh oh, what did I do this time?” Reigen asked, trying to keep things light.
Serizawa took a deep breath, in and out. “Tome and Shigeo filled me in on what happened. How you had the spirit attach itself to you then went into those cursed woods to get rid of it.”
“I had to protect Tome.” Reigen said matter of factly.
“Of course, I completely understand that. If I didn’t currently have a concussion I’d be beating the shit out of that stupid bastard who passed the curse on to her.” Serizawa’s fists clenched and then unclenched. “What I don’t get, is why you keep putting yourself in harm’s way.” His tone softened. “Part of me admires you for being so selfless, but mostly I’m worried that you’re just being reckless.”
“Me? Reckless? Doesn’t sound like me at all.”
“Come on, be serious.”
“I am serious.” Reigen said indignantly. “I took a calculated risk, I had things under control.”
“What if something had gone wrong? What if Shigeo hadn’t gotten to you in time?” There was a hitch in Serizawa’s voice, “There had to have been some other option. I’m mad at myself for not being able to do more.”
Reigen stopped what he was doing and looked up worriedly, “You did what you could and that was enough. I was also just doing what I could.”
“You really just underestimate the impact your life has on others don’t you.”
“Huh?”
“I’ve mentioned it before, and I know you don’t like the idea… but I really think you should seek therapy.”
“What?” Reigen said in a slightly higher pitch than normal. He coughed and readjusted his voice, “Katsuya, I’m fine.”
“Come here.” Serizawa said. Reigen complied, a bit reluctantly, and Serizawa took his hand. “Arataka listen, I’m just worried about you. You can try to convince me all you want, but I know what it feels like to hate your own existence.” He squeezed Reigen’s hand. “You don’t have to do everything alone and you deserve to get better.”
Reigen looked away but continued to hold tightly onto Serizawa’s hand. “Im glad you’ve been able to do well in therapy, but there’s no way anyone can help me.”
“Do you really think that?” Serizawa asked gently. “No one is beyond help, not even you.” He rubbed his thumb over Reigen’s hand. “Can you at least think about it? Even if you can’t do it for yourself yet, could you do it for me? For the kids?”
Serizawa could hear the quiver in Reigen’s voice as he said “Yeah I can think about it.”
“Thank you.”
“You were really that worried?” Reigen sniffed as his shoulders started to shake.
“Of course I was.” Serizawa said as he pulled Reigen in to embrace him. Reigen sobbed quietly into Serizawa’s chest as he started to cry too.
“I n-never wanted to hurt you or a-anyone. I’m sorry.” Reigen said between sobs.
“Shh, it’s not your fault.” Serizawa rubbed Reigen’s back and kissed the top of his head. “I’m just glad you’re ok. I’ll whatever I can to help you, as long as you’ll let me.”
Reigen didn’t say anything but held on tighter. Eventually his breathing slowed and Serizawa thought he might’ve fallen asleep before he whispered “Thank you.”
“Mhmm” Serizawa said, “You know how hard it is for me to be serious when you’re wearing that stupid shirt?”
Reigen laughed, “Shut up, it’s not that stupid.”
“No it’s pretty bad, I don’t know how I deal with you sometimes.”
“You say that as if you don’t own three pairs of crocs.”
“At least crocs are functional!” They both  laughed. “You’ve been standing there a while, why don’t you come sit next to me?”
“Won’t the nurses get mad at me?”
“Fuck ‘em.” Serizawa said, already scooting over to make room.
“Well I guess I don’t have much of a choice.” Reigen said as he claimed the space.
They watched cute dog videos on Serizawa’s phone until they fell asleep, resting their heads on each other and fingers intertwined.
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taeyamayang · 2 years
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Thor probably is a troublemaker, he’s just like 80% blind with his one eye so we don’t know what mischief is because of his blindness and what mischief is just Thor being a menace. But one thing is for sure, heS ALWAYS IN THE WAY! we know it’s not his fault, but a day doesn’t go by where we don’t trip over him at least ONCE. Laying around sleeping and eating all day sounds nice, Momo has the right idea LMAO. I remember a few years ago when finals rolled around I texted my group of friends that I have decided to become a cat because all they have to do is sleep, eat and look cute and I’m already good at all three of those things.
Apparently back in the 90s (I think) reformatory schools were very common and many of which would grab you in the middle of the night and take you to the school. It was common enough that they called it the “Elan snatch” or something like that. Schools like those don’t really exist anymore since the internet and social media made communication a lot easier and no one wanted their kids to go to such a school. that was the one I mentioned last time (elan), it was a Reformatory school but many prep schools that were all snazzy and fancy had some sort of cult within it, whether it be larger or smaller. Especially if they are religious. I know there are many non-cult boarding schools out there but let just say it’s easy to manipulate children when their parents aren’t around.
Also I JUST finished Tokyo Revengers hours before reading the last message. Honestly it left me with a lot of ????? Like wtf just happened, they can’t end the season like that!!! Oof.
Your school uniforms seem so cute! Religious schools kinda scare me tho- (im rereading the message as I write mine on notes so I don’t miss anything and just reread that you went to a religious school…after I said many were cult like??? IM SO SORRY! Like I mentioned earlier not all religious schools are like that and plus you didn’t go to boarding school so) it’s probably because I know that some people take religion differently and much more seriously than others? Like religion can be an amazing thing to help you find yourself, or it could be a harmful thing that controls others. As a queer person, I know of the terrible things that people do for the sake of religion, but I also know that people do amazing things for religion as well. I’ve just heard some crazy things about religious schools in America so I’m kinda weary but you live in a totally different continent and there are many different religions so. But it seems like you went to a really good school by the way you talk about it lol. I had a lot of anxiety in school- I say that like I’m not anxious now after I graduated but anyway- so I only focused on myself with a few friends. I literally didn’t know anyones name or anything like that so when anyone mentioned anybody I was like ????? Who?? I was so outta the loop omg. I didn’t really mind since it kept me outta the drama and people weren’t really my thing anyways so lol. Congrats on being a sports captain and in a school play!! That seems awesome and I could NEVER. Im not sporty at ALL. I played some volleyball at the residential I was at but it wasn’t really serious? I have a shit ton of random ass health problems so sports were never really my thing. I’m also ver uncoordinated and awkward, especially as a child and would often zone out while waiting for the ball or anything. High key would be thinking about a fanfic I wanted to write as the ball flew right past me- oops. I’m not sure if I mentioned this before but i always used to get hit by balls- even when I wasn’t playing??? Like it would make sense if I was but I would just be vibing they BAM! I get hit in the head with a basketball?? From outta nowhere?? I’m suprised I was never concussed. My gym teacher felt bad for me so he let me walk laps instead of playing with balls LMAO. I like to preform and have stage fright as well LOLOL. I think I would be a good actor since I am used to getting in character every time I write a new character or anything (yknow, just writing things) but I’m awkward, shy and hate the sound of my own voice smh. I used to wanna be a singer but puberty hit and my singing voice just dipped smh. But ok??? You can sing! I see you girl! I’m glad your friends signed you up for an audition (even if it pissed you off lol) because it seems like you had a good time lol. I know what it’s like to pull a 180 on your classmates like that because if I ever got passionate about something in class I go all out and my classmates are like ??????. Or if one of my classmates was also in one of the smaller classes with me (smaller classes help reduce anxiety and stuff and again- I had a lot of it) they would see how loud and obnoxious I could be since I’d didn’t have a filter since most of those kids were in the majority of my small classes and my teachers were cool. I would also love to hear what drama you were sucked into lol.
It does suck that I have to censor myself sometimes when it comes to the school, bust sometimes it’s just easier to say “boarding school” bc you have to explain a lot less lol. The school was fucking messy. Like the idea and thought was there, but the place itself was messy. Putting that many kids with that many very different problems never really ended up well. It helped me because my main problem was the self hatred I had for myself because I felt so different and being in a place full of people with problems like mine or worse that all tried their best to exist and persist despite them made me see that I shouldn’t pity myself anymore and see that I deserve to be treated kindly by everyone- including myself. I was and still am very lucky that I have such a supportive family that was there for me all the way- the majority of the kids there didn’t have that.
I’m glad you appreciate the stick figure drawings 😭 I’m not always the best at describing things so I felt like I needed to do a quick sketch lol. Don’t get me wrong, they are both trouble makers in their own way. Kayla does whatever she wants with very little consideration for others or herself. Daia is actually pretty chill and level headed till she gets pissed off or feels like something isn’t fair or right. But yeah I could see her as Chucky sometimes lol. Yeah, life there was problematic and it sucked sometimes- ok it sucked a LOT of the time but I made some memories there and met some people there that I’ll never forget. One day I do hope I can publish a novel about my time there and maybe get it turned into a tv show. I want mental health to be normalized, whether it be the good the bad or the ugly, since I never got that as a kid even though it would have helped me a lot. I’m not sure that would be a good idea because I don’t want it to seem like I’m glamorizing mental health problems, yknow? Plus the majority of the people that would be in the story would be minors and A. That’s a lot of mental turmoil for any child, even if they are acting B. No children should be going through it, even the children the characters are based on C. Kids wouldn’t be able to watch the show, even if it was based on my life as a child. It would be strange to have a tv show with the main cast being children and they couldn’t watch it. I think it would be taken the wrong way, even if intentions. Honestly, I’m suprised that Kayla didn’t need to go to the hospital, I think she just got a few bruises at most. Luckily the staff held Daia back when I couldn’t LOLOL. We got assigned our roommates by age. There could only be a five year age gap between the roommates which left me with the same three people or so each time we changed rooms. But I hate how teachers in general thinking sitting a rowdy person next to a quiet one would do any good. This happened to me and my sister when we were in elementary school and it’s so obnoxious. Like I don’t get paid to babysit??? I come here to learn and get you sit me next to a kid who you know will disrupt my learning??? Also the difference between our schools is INSANE. Honestly you need to watch “American public school tiktoks” I feel like my residenal was required to be chaotic in some ways because it was “therapeutic” but man, public schools are a DIFFERENT BREED in America.
Honestly I didn’t understand that slim thicc and thicc slim either sjbsjaja we weren’t allowed to wear anything revealing so I didn’t really try like other girls did since we would be told to change immediately. And LMAO LOCKER ROOM CONVOS ARE UNIVERSAL I SEE!!!
and don’t worry I’m an introvert as well, I understand about not responding right away, I just am the opposite where it feels wrong if I don’t respond asap smhhhh
OMG YOU FINISHED TR? right after the anime i read the manga bc oh boy the cliffhanger. then, i got so into it i read like 100 chapters in a day to the point where my head hurts lmaoo. are you going to read the manga too?
dude, i just watched the entire 50min smth video about elan school and holy shitttt that used to be a facility? it's also terrifying how almost majority of dehumanizing activities are pioneered by someone who has psychology as their degree (that's my degree 💀) but you know it always starts with someone thinking they have it all figured out and "testing it" more like, experimenting it on people like they're subjects to research. this is precisely why in my course, research ethics is highlighted in every unit and we also talk about the unacceptable deeds early psychologists/psychiatrists did. the elan school got me hooked i hope the original post on reddit is still there cos i want to read it lol.
it's alright omg i studied in a religious school and if that creeps you out it's fine lmaooo contrary tho, here in my country when someone went to a religious school esp if it's exclusive to one gender we always have the prim, proper, and classy stereotype but that isn't the case 💀 even though that was the impression the school has to outsiders, it's different when you are experiencing it. honestly, i think the reason why i knew that i'm gay as young as 12/13 years old is because of the ideology the insititution builtㅡtho it's built so we can be straight competitive women in the future that obviously didn't work well with me. i mean they said love people for who they are and now i love both genders lmaooo kidding aside, although i am raised by a religious family esp my dad and a religious school i am never really /that/ religious(?) since i am exposed to the in and outs of the church i am also aware of their dirty tactics. hence, i gained the habit of questioning everything (also the fact i have trust issues lol) i am not a blind follower and i dont even know if i'm supposed to be called religious just bc i spent more than half of life in that school. the concept religion is hazy for me but i am aware that religion works well for other people. it's therapeutic for them and i respect that. but the thing is (and ig the point of this entire blabber) from what i have observed, even if you try to instill an idea or faith on someone by caging them in an environment that harbors it, it won't work. my school was overall good in terms of disciplining us and in academics but they have rules that are just plainly absurd. like, we were encouraged to have boyfriends as young as 7th grade but if you get too close to a classmate you will get called to counseling and be suspected to dating "your friend" even tho they are really just a friend to you. it sucks cos the word gets out to parents. my country isn't that open to homosexuals yet and the parents who sent their children to religious are ofc religious by nature. so when the word gets out a sense of shame is brought to your family (think of mulan, last names matter and the glory you bring to your family matters as well). it was extremely difficult for my lesbian classmates to pretend they like boys and to conceal their way of expressing their sexuality. we have rules for short hairs. it has to be short but long enough to be feminine. we are not allowed to wear long skirts. most of the lgbt members in my school sport longer skirts cos shorter ones make them feel more comfortable cos they don't have to keep their knees together at all times. at the same time short skirts are not allowed as we may be seen as "slutty". we have specific colors allowed to wear in school (3 colors only to be exact and 2 of which is black and white), never had phones, no dangling earrings, no piercings just the original 2, our pe shoes has to be in the same brands as others, we wear headband with our surnames sewed in it during tests (tho i saw other asian countries who does the same? the purpose is to catch if someone's cheating), no accessories, no polish, if found that you're wearing a lip tint or light foundation you'll be reprimanded to take it off, i can go on and on about these rules that made me feel more or less controlled. in our neighboring schools we were called a cult (tho it's a joke) cos when we go out during field trips and we all look the same. even the pen that everyone uses is almost always the same LMAO. this reminded me of the elan and tho the latter is an extreme case, i think the standford prison experiment holds true and timely. people in authority has the urge to control their subordinates into compliance. it can be beneficial but sometimes it's abused and overlooked. we are coined prim, properly, and classy in exchange of small freedoms.
ANYWAY THAT WAS A LONG RANT I'M SORRY TSBDBSMDBSJ
i am not sure if "sporty" is the right word to describe me? cos back in hs i wasnt sporty but rather adventurous. i have a lot of interests and tho trying smth new sort of scares me i do it anyway (a masochist yes lol) so i tried a lot of things! i was in wnba camp (womens nba) but but was never serious about it. i'm sorry to hear that you're always receiving end of flying balls (and sorry for laughing gemshs jkjk) OHMYGOD HOW IS YOUR HEAD THO 😭. speaking of writing maybe i can give you prompt it's from a personal experience! op is walking out of the gym and the vball team is practicing. the ball lands on op's head then the "star"/ace/famous player of the team approaches op to apologize. everyone including the main character is surprised to know that the player knows their name. and the player will be like "how can i not know?"/"we spent *insert event* few months ago" the event was short and op can't believe the player still remembers. tag me when you write!! ;) about the theater i did, i was a police officer so i had the miranda rights memorized and i hold a gun. the officer i had to play as has a tough personality and all that. the musical is about prostitution, drugs, basically the realities in society. at first, we werent allowed to perform the play as it was too "morbid". the nums didn't like the genre and theme but we pushed for it. in the end, we sold tickets for a good cause.
about your school, although it gave you not-so-good memories i am glad you had a take away from your experience. loving oneself is hard. i learned it the tough way and i'm sure many of us had similar experience. it's hard to learn how to love a person you've known the longestㅡyourself. about the writing plan you have OMG THAT SOUNDS AMAZING??? I WOULD READ YOUR NOVEL 100% i don't think it's glamorizing mental health tho esp if it came from your personal experience. you are simply stating your experiences and all that. i personally think that people should be more exposed to mental health. it should be normalized that there are people who are going through it and that's okay. it's a medical condition much like any other physiological conditions. a person with a condition is never described through their diagnosis and people should know that. i can only imagine how hard it is for you to adjust in an environment as such as the boarding school you attended but i'm glad you have a supporting family. you must love them so much :'). i hope you push through with your novel and tv show dream!! i'll be here to support you and i hope one day i'll see your name at the back of a book or in a credits role. damn, i'll be sooooo proud of you and i'll definitely remember our conversation :D YOU ALWAYS GET SIT NEXT TO A PROBLEM CHILD OHMYGOD YES ME TOO since i rarely talk and "obedient" i always get sit next to a problem child. i have variety of seatmates: one that always talks in class, the isolated, the weird one, aggressive and short tempered, the cool girl, the suspected gay (and is gay), the smoker, the guidance kid, etc. tho i end up in good terms with all of them LMAO tho the first days were soooo awkward
segway, yesterday i watched a documentary in netflix called "the most hated man in the internet" and HOLY SHIT THAT WAS WILD but i love it how a loving mother could save a number of women across america. if you haven't watched it i recommend you to go for it!! if you're interested in documentaries and crime :)
my reply took ages bc i wrote half of this before my family and i went across the country to attend a wedding and when i got back home i also went back to writing to you too!
thank you for understanding my low social energy lol i hope to hear more from you, myve! ♡
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dailytechnologynews · 6 years
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GloFo 7nm: A Lost Hope
So as you may know GloFo 7nm was recently cancelled, in this article im going to analyze all of what this implies in a lot of levels but mostly on the technical one, both in short and long term
before beginning please have in mind:
1) im Spanish and my english writing might be poor, also this is by far the longest article ive ever wrote and it took me 2 and a half Hours to complete, there can be mistakes but don't be harsh pls
2) i currently own a bit of AMD stock, this means I focus on them more, but as you will see this doesn't affect my thinking
3) i link various articles in this one, i recommend you reading them for better comprehension
4) this article contains A LOT of estimates, they are based on public knowledge, if some of that knowledge turns out to be false or inaccurate the estimates based on it do the same, however they are the best that I can do, if I had more hard data I will use it. in particular, my estimates about TSMC 7nm are… weak and early, please don't complain about them, its the best I can do without more hard data
9001) WARNING: this article is LONG, the character count its literally OVER 9000!!!!
with that said lets begin
The first important question is WHY? Why did GloFo cancel their 7nm node? the answer is simple: MONEY, this quote from anandtech sums things up:
So, the key takeaway here is that while the 7LP platform was a bit behind TSMC’s CLN7FF when it comes to HVM – and GlobalFoundries has never been first to market with leading edge bulk manufacturing technologies anyway – there were no issues with the fabrication process itself. Rather there were deeper economic reasons behind the decision.
the full article is here: https://www.anandtech.com/show/13277/globalfoundries-stops-all-7nm-development
The second question is: how does GloFo 7nm compare to TSMC 7nm, because if glofo’s node was worse than TSMC's then the only loss here would be the competition, well this is absolutely not the case, GloFo 7nm was superior than TSMC 7nm, maybe by a wide margin, but this depends literally of thousands of factors, so the best that i can do is to approximate the final answer basing on all that we know first we have to know the specifics of GloFo 7nm, here is an excellent article containing them and more: https://fuse.wikichip.org/news/641/iedm-2017-globalfoundries-7nm-process-cobalt-euv/ if you read the article and understand most of it, you have my respect, but lets list the facts that we care about:
1) 55% power reduction at the same frequency
2) 40% frequency improvement at the same power
3) extremely tuned fin profiles
4) cobalt for some critical layers, improving interconnect speed and drastically reducing electromitigation, this is very important as the wall to reaching high clocks is interconnect speed
this looks extremely nice, but how does this translate into real world max clocks? Well if you assume the GloFo chart was linear then the results are very good, here is a calibration based in real data, done in the anandtech forums by /u/catmerc (thanks!): https://forums.anandtech.com/threads/next-gen-zen-2-3-starship-and-derivatives.2511914/page-3#post-39322122 you watched right: 4,6 GHz at the same power you would get 3,3 GHz on 14nm, WOW, this means that (again if the chart was linear) 5 GHz wouldn't be far fetched at all, this is probably too good and my estimations are that GloFo 7nm was a bit worse than what this chart implies, still I think 5 GHz would have been doable, but only for single core turbo, just in case: im referring to the SoC version, clocks on 7HPC would have been ludicrous
now we have to analyze how good TSMC 7nm is, this is harder to know and there is less data about this but lets do it anyway. first we have to get the advertised numbers, and those are 60% power reduction at the same frequency or 30% frequency improvement at the same power, source: https://www.anandtech.com/show/12677/TSMC-kicks-off-volume-production-of-7nm-chips, this is starting to look worse than GloFo from the first moment, however there is a big issue here: the bases are different, GloFo bases their 7nm numbers on their 14nm, and TSMC does it over their 16nm+ this makes comparison hard, I remember that TSMC 16nm clocked higher than Samsung 14nm which is the same as GloFo 14nm, but consumed a bit more and was less dense, I cant source those claims but if you look at the numbers they make sense, anyway this approach failed as a solid comparison point so lets move on, how about taking the words of their clients? Spoiler alert: worse than GloFo
Speed gains of 16% at 10 nm may dry up at 7 nm due to resistance in metal lines. Power savings will shrink from 30% at 10 nm to 10–25% at 7 nm, and area shrinks may decline from 37% at 10 nm to 20–30% at 7 nm, said Paul Penzes, a senior director of engineering on Qualcomm’s design technology team. source: https://www.eetimes.com/document.asp?doc_id=1333109
Arm claims that the latest 7-nm nodes will only deliver 2% to 3% more speed than the 16-nm node. “There hasn’t been much frequency benefit at all since 16 nm … wire speed hasn’t scaled for some time,” said Peter Greenhalgh, an Arm fellow and vice president of technology. source: https://www.eetasia.com/news/article/18060102-arm-announces-high-performance-laptop-cpu
so basically two clients of TSMC are saying that there are close to none clock gains on 7nm (compared to 10nm, this is important) and I know they mean TSMC and not GloFo because they both say the problem is interconnect speed which if you remember from above is one of the things GloFo 7nm improved a lot thanks to cobalt and other things, also GloFo is a much smaller fab, it was going to get into HVM later and most people were going to use TSMC anyway. So now we know TSMC 7nm isn't as good as GloFo 7nm was, but by how much? Well a little time ago I made a prediction of how Ryzen 3000 would clock on both nodes, I recently updated it to reflect that AMD will use the HPC variant: https://www.reddit.com/r/aceshardware/comments/923t76/ryzen_3000_clock_predictions/ so there is your answer, a not at all laughable 300 MHz loss, but I think you also want to know how did I get to that concussion, well… it is a bit tricky and fail prone also it has a 100mhz or higher margin of error, anyway here it goes: the base is Ryzen 7 1800X which turbos up to 4 GHz on GloFo 14LPP TSMC 16nm+ clocks higher than GloFo 14lpp but lower than 12LP, 4,2GHz is my best estimate, TSMC 10nm should give about 5% of a boost to max clocks (remember max clocks ALWAYS increase less than “performance” for high end CPUs) that gets us to >4,4 GHz, going from 10nm to 7nm should give a negligible boost of around 2% but this is just enough to put that number on 4,5 GHz, this is the number for the mobile variant, but as i discovered during the writing of this article, AMD is going to use the HPC variant which features a 7.5 track library instead of the 6 track one found in the mobile variant it also should use fater interconnects, finding how much will this variant boost clocks is again as there is EVEN LESS data on it, the only numbers that I could find are +13% perf over the mobile variant and up to 4,4 GHz speed for the sram(L* cache), cache usually is a bit slower than the CPU itself so this doesnt mean the limit is 4,4 GHz. with all of this my estimation for 7nm HPC is 4,7 GHz which is still lower than the GloFo 7nm SoC version, have in mind im being a bit cautious with this one 4,8 GHz is possible , just for laughs if we compared max clocks of GloFo 7nm HPC(IBM only) vs TSMC 7nm HPC the difference will be ~0,8GHz, LOL just LOL (the number is serious tough) as you can see this is tricky as is based on estimates over estimates, however there are some limits to how good or how bad it can clock, so while my number might (and possibly will) fail, it cant fail by much The third question is: who this affects and how does it? The answer is AMD, IBM, Intel, TSMC and maybe Samsung, so lets analyze how it affects everyone on that list
AMD: Negatively
after the previous paragraph you can see why: 300-200mhz loss its not good, but this is just the tip of the iceberg, even if GloFo continued with 7nm AMD might have chosen TSMC 7nm for ryzen 3000 because of time constraints, the really bad thing about this is that the clocks of TSMC nodes are expected to be flat until 3nm which will mean a tech change from finfet to gaafet, this means Intel has 3-4 years of wide and increasing clock leadership so the only way AMD can beat Intel’s performance in the desktop market is through big IPC increases, which are unlikely to be big enough,still AMD should be able to beat Intel in value (perf/price) by a very good margin, server and laptop market are a VERY different story and I expect AMD to do very well on those. another HUGE concern for AMD should be prices, with near zero competition TSMC can increase prices both on the short and the long term, similar to the DRAM market, this means either smaller margins for AMD or higher final product prices.
for those all reasons I did cut my personal stock price target for AMD by a BIG 20%, yes you heard right: the day before the announcement I thought AMD was going to reach a 25% (because percentages work that way) higher price than today, im not going to say what my exact price targets are but I believe AMD is going to go up from the current price, just much less than before
IBM: Negatively, VERY negatively
well.. this guys really take the worst part, basically they have no node suitable for their high-end CPUs for the foreseeable future, glofo spun off an ASIC group which is said to help port costumer designs to other nodes, the problem is that there is no high performance 7nm class node apart from intel 10nm (if they fix it)
Intel: Positively
a lot of what I said for AMD applies here in reverse, Intel basically has an assured performance lead in the desktop market over AMD, but still they will have to compete to a denser, cheaper to produce 7nm chip lineup with their 14nm one, their server market share is still posed to get lower maybe by a bog amount
TSMC: Positively, VERY positively
on the short term they get more volume and therefore revenue, and in a now 2-player game (3 if intel opens its fabs) they get the ability to increase or even pact prices
Samsung: Positively
Samsung on the short term will probably see no gains, but on the long term they might win some designs, however the big win for them is the lack of competency driving prices an therefore margins up
YOU, the consumer: Negatively
as per the points stated above you might get more expensive chips, and maybe even worse ones, cutting-edge node development is mindblowingly expensive and that maybe is an understatement, with less competition tsmc and samsung might opt to do less aggressive jumps to save a huge amount of money on RD, this remains to be seen, it may not happen, but the possibility is out there and I wont dismiss it
to end I would like to quote an excellent comment from /u/nagromo which summarizes perfectly some of my thoughts:
I was hopeful that IBM research working with them meant it would be more like "IBM 7nm, manufactured by GloFo", similar to how they've done well with Samsung 14nm. I still think there's a decent chance it really was on track, and they're telling the truth and just think they can be more profitable using their successful 12/14nm technologies instead of investing $10B+ into 7nm. I'm really disappointed to hear this. I thought it was a reasonable hope that the IBM research team would be able to achieve or approach their 40% performance, 55% power numbers. There's rumors about poor performance from TSMC 7nm. My hopes for Ryzen 3 aren't nearly as high as they were yesterday.
this article was originally wrote by me to /r/aceshardware
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sheepydraws · 7 years
Text
I'll Kick Your Ass! I'll Kick My Fiancee's Ass! I'll Kick My Own Ass!(5/11)
Last Chapter 
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October
Facebook messenger:
Akane: I think I’m getting somewhere with Ryoga.
Ranma: Should you really be messaging me during class? Don’t you think I might be trying to pay attention?
Akane: You’re playing tetris, like you do every class, because you’re just that lame.
Ranma: And you are somehow taking notes and im-ing me, because you are just THAT lame.
Akane: It’s called multitasking. I’m earning a degree, and breaking off my engagement at the same time.
Ranma: So when is this guy gonna challenge me again? ‘Cause it’s getting too cold for this shit.
Akane: He’s coming along. He’s recovered physically, now I think he needs just another little confidence boost and he’ll be ready to go again.
Akane: I have a plan.
Ranma: I have to make a fool of myself, don’t I?
Akane: No. Just make a mess of your next challenge. Almost lose.
Ranma: You can’t see it, but I’m rolling my eyes.
Akane: You’re right. All I can see is the porn on your tumblr dash.
Ranma: I follow a lot of artists. It’s artistic nudity!!!
Akane: It’s tentabulges, Ranma.
Akane: Grow up and get ready to throw some fights
Genma’s phone———— > Ranma’s phone
Soun and I are coming for the
parent day thing to get my car
back.
                                                                                         Cool. I’ll tell everyone        
                                                                                         you’re my gay uncles.
No, you will not. I was thinking
we could spar. If you win you
get a cheat day.
                                                                                            You’re on.
Kuno’s phone——->Nabiki’s phone
Nabiki Tendo, are you the person
to whom I should submit my
desire to challenge Ranma?
                                                                                       I can tell you’re Kuno
                                                                                       but I have no idea how        
                                                                                       you got this number.
Sister. Has a friend who has a
friend.
Where do I submit?
                                                                                        At my feet.
You keep thr box is there?
                                                                                       Are you okay?
I go my head hit. Mmmask broke.
Remembered I had to tallk to YOU.
                                                                                       Where are you?
Health cenydr cengwe cen
                                                                                    Do you have a concussion?
                                                                                     Kuno?
Kodachi’s Journal:
My only brother!
Twisted as you are
I believed you to be impervious from harm
And guarded against deceit.
But it seems you are as many faced as a hindu god
Yet as weak as a mere mortal.
I have no words for what I’ve seen
or rather i am brimming with unsaid words
But you are deaf to them
(Cause you’re asleep. And I have to sit here at your desk and make sure you can wake up and it’s tedious as fuck and I should really get you to do something for me after this, once you explain why the fuck Nabiki Tendo was the one who told me you had hit your head again. I really can’t figure out how to make a poem about that. I mean, what the fuck? Why was she at the health center, her face all pinched and weird? Then she saw me and she was like, okay, this is everything I know about concussions cause my dad runs a dojo and blah blah blah and I had to sit there for like an hour as she explained everything that the nurse would then spend, like, another hour saying. AND I’VE ALREADY DONE THIS ONCE THIS YEAR. Why does it take so long to say, he needs to rest but not too much? UUUUUUUUGGGGHHHH)
My brother is not impervious without his helmet.
Without him I won’t be either.
Nabiki’s phone———->Ranma’s phone
Kuno may have a concussion, but
he wants to duel you.
                                                                                           Again???
I don’t fucking know. Now you’d be
dueling for Akane instead of his
sister’s honor or whatever, right?
                                                                                I mean, he must have a head
                                                                                injury if he wants to take me    .                                                                               again.
Dude…Shut up.
                                                                                            What?
I was scared, okay? Only for a
minute, but I was really
freaked out when he was
texting me gibberish.
Goddamnit, Tatewaki Kuno
is MINE. The only person
who gets to kill him is
ME.
                                                                                       Jesus christ, Nabiki.    .        .                                                                                      And you tell me I should  .                                                                                      get therapy.
You should.
                                                                               Bet we could get a group rate.
Dear Ryoga,
You haven’t written in a while, is everything alright? You’re making friends, right? I mean, you’re not lonely, are you? You aren’t always great at being social. I know. I had to practically drag you out of the library and shove you into that booth at Ronnie’s for our first date. Of course, later, I really loved that unlike a lot of my friends boyfriends, you weren’t a skirt chaser. You never looked at another girl.
I totally botched the Creamfield bake-off. By the time the buzzer went off the only thing that was done was me. Three weeks of perfecting that custard and it didn’t set. The humidity, I suppose. Or maybe it was me. My cooking has gone completely off the rails. I can barely make a proper sponge turn out. It’s like I’ve been cursed.
Of course, this happens from time to time. I just hoe you’re doing better than me.
Best wishes,
Akari.
——I feel like I’m just missing/something whenever you leave/You’ve got all the ingredients/except you needing me
Mousse’s phone——> Shampoo’s phone
Are you really not going to come
home until Thanksgiving break?
                                                                                    Yes.
We’re literally an hour away.
I’ll make the drive.
                                                                Look. I have a boyfriend, and he’s going
                                                                 overseas for winter break, so I have to
                                                                 make the most of our weekends.
You? A boyfriend? That’s
rich.
                                                                                     So’s he. And British.
Oh, yeah, and I’ll never see him
because he’s always in England?
At least I don’t lie to you.
                                                                I’m not lying. I could ask him if he wants
                                                                 to come over for Thanksgiving break.
Sure. When he respectfully
declines you should consider
coming home this weekend.
Facebook Messenger:
Shampoo: Ryoga, I need you to text this number and say you would love to see us for Thanksgiving break, but you’re going to be in England.
Ryoga: But I won’t be. I have to stay with my mom upstate.
Shampoo: Sure. Say that. Hell, that’s more believable.
Ryoga: Wait, could I stay with you over the break?
Shampoo: No, you have to see your mom, remember? Why wouldn’t you want to see your mom?
Ryoga: We’ve never been close. Not in a bad way, she’s just never around. I don’t really know her.
Shampoo: Didn’t you come here to be closer to her? This is your chance!
Ryoga: Actually, I came here because…I don’t know. I was looking at college applications and Akari wanted us to go together, and I love Akari, but…
Shampoo: But you needed to bond with your mother!
Ryoga: No, I was thinking about how, when I was a kid my parents dragged me from here to kingdom come because of their jobs. Then they split and my dad took me to England. Then one day this girl kind of decided I was her boyfriend, and then she wanted to decide the rest of my life.
Ryoga: I felt like I had never chosen anything for myself. So I made the craziest decision I could. A choice no one would have made for me. That’s why I’m here.
Shampoo: Touching, riveting stuff, Ry-Ry. Really. You should write a book.
Shampoo: TEXT THE NUMBER.
Dear Akari,
Of course there aren’t any other girls [deleted].
Akari, I would never cheat on you. I know you were being a little flippant in your last e-mail, but I’m serious. There are pretty girls here, of course. There are pretty girls from the end of Africa to the tip of Antartica, but I would never touch a single one if I was dating someone else.
I’m sorry to hear about the bake off. Maybe you should make something you never make so that even if it isn’t perfect you won’t be able to tell.
There was a lot of excitement here today. Long story short, one of my friends and her boyfriend [deleted] friend [deleted] and my roommate got thrown in a pond. It was terrifying. Everyone thought they were going to die, or catch pneumonia and then die.
I’ll tell you the whole story when we see each other over winter break. Sorry I won’t be home for the Thanksgiving break they’re giving us (can you imagine?) I want to spend it with my mom. We’ve really been getting on together.
See you soon
Ryoga
Akane’s Diary:
Today was…not a good day.
You’d think a day that ends curled up writing in your diary with someone’s head in your lap would be pretty decent, but so far this is the nicest thing that has happened.
Well, that and the fact that there were crepes at breakfast. You know how in Catcher in the Rye the school always served them steak before the parents showed up, so that if their parents asked what they had eaten for dinner last night they would say steak? Well damnit if it isn’t true. The food was fantastic today: roasted potatoes and cheesecake and chicken tenders and a beef roast. And a crepe bar.
It would have tasted a lot better if I hadn’t been panicking the entire time dad and Nabiki and I were eating lunch. Kuno and Ranma were going to duel at 1:45 (Kuno figured it was when the dining hall would be the most packed so no parents would catch them), and I had to make sure Ryoga showed up and saw Ranma slipping. I wonder if Kuno arranged for the duel to be today because he knew his father would be busy?
Anyway. So I’m sitting there wolfing down my potatoes and half listening to my dad tell me about how things are back home, when Genma Saotome plopped down at our table.
Plopped is not the right word for it. Genma is explosive. He plunks down, tossing his keys onto the table, where they smack into and almost topple my milk glass, then throws one arm over the back of his chair and places the other on the table, taking up as much space as humanly possible before he says, “ ‘Kane, do you know where Ranma is?”
I keep eating. Genma never figured out my deadname, or doesn’t remember it, or maybe just says ‘Kane because he thinks it will get a bigger rise out of me. I don’t know. But I don’t dignify taunts with a response.
Nabiki stabbed a bit of her roast and said, “I can’t imagine why you think Akane would know.”
“My car keys were on his bed-do any of you lock your doors?-but I can’t find him. I’ve been texting him and he knew we were coming, so he must be hiding.” Then Genma laughed that awful laugh of his. Super loud, but grating instead of infectious like a good loud laugh should be. “Scared to take on his old man. Can you imagine?”
“I’m sorry, dad,” I said, standing up and pushing my chair in, “Can you hang out with Nabiki for a bit? I told a friend of mine I would help him study.”
“Didn’t you just finish midterms?” My dad said with a sip of milk, “I thought that was why this was scheduled for today, so you wouldn’t be too worried about class.”
“Yeah, he thinks he really fucked up, so we were going to go over some stuff to calm him down. It shouldn’t take more than an hour.”
My dad shrugged. I call him pretty regularly, so it wasn’t like we had a ton of catching up to do. I think he really came to get Genma’s car back and seeing Nabiki and I was just a bonus. “Alright. I’ll be with Nabiki till dinner, then I’m leaving.”
Nabiki made an interesting face, which may have had something to do with all the contraband in her room, but I couldn’t help her. I had to run down to Ryoga’s room and tell him to watch the duel today.
“Isn’t this a re-run?” Ryoga asked, without looking up from his computer.
“That’s why I want to see it. I’ve heard Kuno intends to win this time.”
“Good for him.”
Obviously Ryoga did not see this as the rematch of the century, so I changed tracks. “Please do this with me, I need some time away from Ranma’s father.”
That got his attention. “Ranma’s father?”
“Yeah. He came down with my dad and is stuck to his side and he’s-“ I made vague hand gestures. I mean, there are words for Genma Saotome, but they are best barked in German, not whined in English.
Ryoga shrugged and stretched and looked around for his jacket. “I guess if you need a break that bad…This won’t take long right?”
“Nope.” I said, although I assumed it would be longer than the last couple of duels. If Ranma was going to fuck around and almost lose it would probably take a while to put on a good show.
Then again, I feel like Ranma has been dealing with these fights faster and faster the colder it gets. He does not like shivering.
We get to the expected spot by the lake and Ranma and Kuno are there, and they’ve decided to wait until two to start, since a lot of people apparently wanted to come to this one. I don’t know how Nabiki gets the word out about these things, but she sure does a good job of it.
Ranma kept checking the clock on his phone, then regretting it and stuffing his fingers back into his pockets.
Ryoga asked me if I was cold like five times, but I was staying warm making faces at Ranma, trying to convey how badly I wanted them to JUST START ALREADY. Ranma says I looked like I was trying not to sneeze.
Finally it was either two or Ranma was really sick of waiting, because he asked for someone to count down from three.
“Should only one of you have a sword?” I said before anyone could start counting.
Ranma gave me a cocky grin. “I can handle him, and his wood. Count us in, darlin’.”
Considering what happened later I feel pretty stupid for blushing at that.
As soon as I said ‘three’, Kuno lunged. He is not a subtle fighter. He refused to go on the defensive. To be fair, his sword did give him a much bigger reach, but it also gave Ranma some time to play up how weak he had gotten. He was slow and wobbly, barely dodging Kuno’s swings, and when he jumped out of the way he couldn’t stick his landings. He didn’t even try to attack, as though Kuno was too fast for him.
“Is he hungover again?” Ryoga whispered to me.
“I don’t think he’s been training.” I whispered back. It was hard to keep a straight face as I said that. I would bet my sister-hell, both of them-on Ranma running, stretching, and lifting weights everyday. Ranma doesn’t do cheat days, and he does not skip leg day.
But he was putting on a good performance, staying just ahead of Kuno, but close enough that even I thought he might lose.
Which meant Kuno thought that too, so he got even more reckless, and in one ill-timed swing and a well timed kick, he was down for the count.
“Goddamnit,” He said as he got up off the ground, “I came here to defend Miss Tendo’s honor. I think of her—“
“Is that the best you can do?”
I froze. Not that I wanted to hear Kuno talk about my porcelain flower or whatever weird metaphor he was about to get into, but I’d take him over Genma Saotome any day.
“Run home to mommy, you fucking pansy.” Genma said to Kuno as he took Kuno’s place in the center of the unofficial ring.
Kuno looked shocked. I don’t think anyone has ever taken that tone with him. Sneering and cruel. Even Nabiki can’t talk like that, like her words are made of splinters.
Kuno drew himself up to his full height. “I take unction at your tone-“ He looked Genma up and down, and made his distain clear before he graciously added, “-sir.”
“And I take unction at you still being in my ring.” Genma went to shove Kuno and Kuno dodged, just as Genma knew he would. Kuno took a sharp kick to the stomach, and though he walked out of the ring with his head held high, he had a look on his face that said he would much rather have doubled over.
“You see?” Genma said, turning to Ranma. “That’s how you deal with a guy like that. None of this wobbling all over the place. Who trained you, kid? ‘Cause it sure as hell wasn’t me.”
“Who the hell are you?!” Ryoga yelled, pretty freaked out.
Genma glared at him. “Genma Saotome. I thought I was Ranma’s teacher, but he clearly hasn’t learned jack shit.” He looked from me to Ryoga and smirked, “This the friend you were helping, Akane?”
“How did you even get here?”
He shrugged. “Heard some kids talking about a duel. I figured Ranma would be around.” He turned to address the crowd at large. “Shows over, by the way. Ranma and I have some family business to settle, so I suggest you all move along.”
I don’t think anyone wanted to be around Genma a minute longer than they had to. I actually had to grab Ryoga’s coat to keep him still. I wasn’t going anywhere. I could see Ranma over Genma’s shoulder, stock still, head down, centering himself. He was preparing for a serious fight. I wasn’t about to leave him alone in it.
Genma saw we weren’t leaving and decided to ignore us. “Might as well have you count us in,” He grunted at me. He took off his coat and tossed it to the side. The man is getting into his fifties, but he is still packed with muscle you can see right through his shirt.
I counted them in, but after I finished they just circled each other. They went around and around, waiting for the first move.
I don’t want to write what happened after that. I’m a little queasy just remembering it. I had thought for a minute that it would be like when my dad and I sparred. Fun and fast, me showboating a little and desperately looking for the upper hand as my father carefully blocked me and sent quick hits my way. My dad’s always gone easy on me—no, my dad always protected me. He could have thrashed me soundly, but he didn’t, because what kind of a sick fuck would do that to their own kid?
Not that Ranma wasn’t giving as good as he got, mind you. He’s been training with his dad his whole life. Still, every time his dad landed a hit I would gasp and grab Ryoga’s sleeve. Genma may have taught Ranma how to dodge, but he’s not as good at taking a punch, and Genma played to that.
I don’t know why my stomach clenched every time Ranma got hit. Maybe it was because it was his dad, and there is something about watching someone’s parents beat them up that makes me viscerally ill. Maybe it’s because I used to be scared of my dad. Not that he had ever threatened me, but, well, Genma’s the worst, but judging by the people dad used to hang out with, he wasn’t always the nicest person, either. There was no telling what he was going to do when I came out.
He cried. It was the last thing I was expecting. Questions, I think. Shock and a long string of questions.
Instead he burst into tears and kept talking about my mom. He didn’t make a lot of sense, and I wasn’t sure what to do, so I poured a bowl of potato chips and cracked open a beer for him. Kasumi usually cooks when people are sad, but that’s about the extent of my culinary skills.
Anyway, at some point my dad calmed down a little and said, “I’m sorry, Akane. When you have kids all you want for them is the best life possible. Then their mothers pass away, and they tell you things like that, and you know their lives are going to be that much harder.”
So I said, “You know, by you being okay with this you’re making my life a lot easier already, right?” and we shared a smile, and for a minute there I felt really good, like everything was going to work out.
I don’t know what Genma said when Ranma came out to him, but for some reason while they fought I started trying to imagine it. Every scenario I came up with made me madder and madder. Chest shaking, vision blurring mad. Rage. I wanted to plough my fists into his chest. I wanted to crack his skull like a cinder block.
That was when Ranma bounced off a tree and flew towards his father. It would have doubled his power if he’d actually hit his dad, but a move like that gave Genma plenty of time to react.
Genma threw Ranma into the lake.
I screamed.
Both Ryoga and Genma jumped.
I think I was screaming words?
Genma blocked as I ran past him.
You ever jumped into a half-frozen pond? Rage can’t keep you warm in there. I swear my heart stopped for a minute. By that point Ryoga was screaming too. Although he was screaming my name and telling me to stop and that he would call security or whatever.
I can’t swim, but I can tread water a little, and that’s all you really need to drag a guy out of a shallow lake.
For a minute Ranma lay on the shore and I kneeled there, shaking and gasping, and thinking, At least if I throw up it’ll be warm.
“We have to get you in a hot shower,” Ryoga said as he tried to pull me to my feet.
“Blankets,” I gasped. My chest was doing that awful thing where you shiver right down to your spine, causing your ribs to vibrate against each other. “A hot shower could put us into shock.”
“Is that what’s happening to Ranma?”
Ranma didn’t look good, but aside from his lips being blue, he didn’t look bad, either. Just dazed. He waved a hand limply and opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but his teeth just chattered so loudly it seemed theatrical. A skull shouldn’t make that noise unless someone is clacking it’s jaw together and reciting shakespeare.
Ryoga helped him up and the three of us staggered to the closest dorm, which was Ryoga and Ranma’s.
Once we were in their room I told Ryoga to go get the pile of blankets on top of my dresser, and tell Nabiki and dad what had happened.
By the time he left the room Ranma had his shirt off and was fumbling with the edge of his binder. Between his numb fingers and the water plastering it to his skin I was the one who had to wrestle it off of him. While Ranma rummaged around for another clean shirt I stripped off my tights, and discarded them next to his binder.
“Do you have a shirt I could wear?” I whispered. The last thing you would expect ice water to affect is your voice, but it closes off your throat like a fist.
Ranma didn’t say anything. He went over to his closet and dragged a big flannel robe off the top shelf.
For a few minutes it felt like a locker room after pe in highschool, both of us carefully moving around each other and pointedly not looking at anything in particular. Except instead of heading off to biology we had to sit there on Ranma’s bed, waiting for Ryoga to come back with all my stuff.
“You didn’t have to do that.” Ranma said as he wrung his hair out in a scratchy white towel.
“I thought your heart might have stopped or something.”
“It wasn’t that cold.”
“I guess.”
I toyed with a loose thread on the robe. I was also wrapped in the comforter off Ryoga’s bed, but underneath my skin still felt cold and clammy where it overlapped.
“Where’d you pick up that blanket thing?” Ranma asked, passing me the towel. “I thought for hypothermia you were supposed to get naked and share body heat.”
I snorted. “Sure, Ranma, but I don’t have a pile of pretty naked people on my dresser.”
“You could if you wanted to.” Ranma said with a wink. I would have laughed if the wink hadn’t made him wince.
“Did he have to hit your face?” I said, softly, as though that would make it less awful.
Ranma touched the spot where he would soon have a shiner. “Well, yeah. I left it open.”
I wanted to scream for a second. Tell him that was the worst thing I had ever heard, but what could he have said? Like it was his fault his father was disgusting.
“Stand up.” Ranma said, and I got off the bed. He gently took Ryoga’s comforter from me and spread it over his bed. Then he climbed back into the bed and scooted over so there was room for me to join him.
I stood there for a minute, weighing the desire to be warm against my desire for things to not be even more awkward, when Ryoga returned with the blankets, my clothes, and my family. He also had this book. I had forgotten I shoved it between the folds of the blankets till it fell out as he unfolded one.
Nabiki immediately ran over and cradled my face in her hands, demanding to know what had happened. I told her while dad checked Ranma and started layering him with blankets. By the time he was done all that stuck out was Ranma’s hair. With all those blankets on top of him, and his hair half red and half black with his roots coming in, my bed looked like we were putting on a production of  the Princess and the Chile Pepper.
Then dad made me get in the bed and worried over us for a little longer, asking if we needed anything, if we were getting warmer, until he had to go get dinner and go home. He kissed us both on the forehead like we were sick kids. Which I guess we were.
Nabiki promised that she would make sure we were okay, and saw him out. On the way they bumbped into Kodachi Kuno of all people, who showed up with two plates full of food from the dining hall. She was all blushey and stuttery, and it was kind of adorable.
Maybe Ranma will go out with her someday. It might be cute.
Don’t tell Ranma, but he’s kind of cute when he sleeps. He doesn’t look like he’s about to start a fight. Slack-jawed and innocent, like everyone else.
Right now I’m sitting up in bed with Ranma’s head on my thigh, and Ryoga typing something at his desk. It’s not just warm, it’s downright cozy in here. I’m probably going to fall asleep like this, because I am far too comfortable to move.
Although lying down would mean moving Ranma’s head.
I’d have to touch it.
I bet his hair is really soft.
No, wait, it got bleached to put the red in.
(It’s really soft).
Ryoga’s phone——->Mousse’s phone
Hey, it’s Ryoga. I’m coming
over with Shampoo for
Thanksgiving. How is that
going to work? Are you
going to pick us up? what
time? Where?
                                                             Who is this? How do you
                                                             know Shampoo?
Well, we met cause I’m
friends with her room
mate.
                                                             Are you the boyfriend she
                                                             was talking about?
Sure. Why not.
                                                             Shampoo’s grandmother will
                                                             be horrified. Let me ask her
                                                             what she thinks.
Mousse’s phone——-> Grandmother’s phone
Grandmother, Shampoo
wants to bring a boy
home for Thanksgiving
break!!!
                                                               How nice. I’d love to see what kind
                                                               of boy could capture her heart.
                                                               Wild as a horse, fickle as a cat.
                                                               Let’s see the man who’d propose
                                                               to tame her.
Grandmother, it’s disgust-
ing!!! They may be having
sex! They might have it
under your roof!!!
                                                              Easy on the exclamation points, son.
                                                              I wouldn’t mind some great
                                                              grandchildren!
                                                              Now stop texting and get back here.
                                                              This lemon chicken won’t deliver itself!
Mousse’s phone——->Ryoga’s phone.
Lot outside the girls dorm,
Friday, four pm. Don’t be
late. I will leave without
you.
A small white spiral bound notebook with ‘Ranma Saotome’ written along the top edge of the cover in block letters with a black sharpie.
I always thought diaries were just plot devices, but Akane actually keeps one and she’s a lot better adjusted than me, so I thought I’d try it for a while.
I’ve never slept with a girl before. Ukyo and I had sex, but that was always in the middle of the afternoon, or in a parked car, or whatever. We never slept with each other.
I guess what I’m really thinking about is that I woke up with a girl. It was weird. I didn’t see Akane the second I woke up. I was staring at the ceiling, one leg and like twenty blankets hanging over the edge of the bed. I was trying to remember the dream I’d been having or some other dumb shit like that, and then I turned over and was nose to nose with Akane.
She looked different with her hair all messed up and pillow creases on her face. She’s usually perfect. Hair tucked back, just a teeny bit of make up, pressed dress. She looked kind of funny drooling on my pillow.
Then she woke up and I freaked out. I mean, all I did was freeze up, but I was sure she was about to scream at me or something.
She smiled. This big, goony smile, like she’d just buried her face in a dog’s belly or had a sip of sweet, creamy, hot chocolate.
“Hey.” She whispered.
“Hey.”
She has huge eyes. Huge and dark with super long lashes.
“You feel okay?” she asked.
“Yeah. You?”
She stretched her arms over the head, pressing her palms against the wall. Then she went back to smiling. “I feel way too relaxed. I have like two essays due this week.”
“Me too.”
“Yeah. We’re taking the same classes.”
I think I blushed. My face definitely got warmer. I’m a fucking idiot.
“Ranma,” Akane said, and the way she was looking at me was soft and intense at once. Cow eyes? I don’t know. Like a soap opera. I thought she was going to tell me she was pregnant, or maybe start crying.
She touched my face. The crest of bone just under my eye. I’m not sure what the word is for something like that. Intimate, maybe. It felt like the most intimate I had ever been with someone.
Then she broke it. Whatever that moment was. She sat up and stretched again, and said, “I should really get to the library and start on that Ottoman essay. I hate research essays. I can never get good sources.” She climbed over me and started gathering up all her stuff. Including a little black book.
“Is that your diary?” I asked, because for some reason I needed to keep talking.
She frowned and shoved it under her coat. “It’s nothing. Make sure Ryoga doesn’t forget my quilts when he comes over.”
Then she left. I’m sure it was a diary, so I figured I would try writing stuff down too and dug out this notebook.
I think this top blanket here is homemade. I think most of these are. They look knit or crochet or something. I wonder if Kasumi made them.
Well. I wrote everything down and I still feel as crazy as ever. I’m gonna go for a run. That always does the trick.
Facebook Messenger:
Shampoo: I JUST GOT MY COSTUME!!!!
Ukyo: Cool. I’m in class.
Shampoo: I LOOK SO GOOD!!! THERE’S THIS HUGE PARTY AT SOMEONE’S HOUSE OFF CAMPUS. YOU, ME, BANGING COSTUMES, DRINKS, DANCING, BOYS? GIRLS? INSANITY!!!
Ukyo: I did bring my costume from last year…
Shampoo: YEEEEEEEESSSSSSS!!!!
Shampoo: Should I invite Ryoga?
Ukyo: I think he’d like that
Ukyo: But he has to wear a costume. Tell him it’s mandatory!
Facebook messenger, Royga:
Shampoo: PARTY!!! YOU ME UKYO DRINKS DANCING MAKING OUT!!!
Ryoga: When?!!
Shampoo: HALLOWEEN! YOU NEED A COSTUME!
Ryoga: Shit. Where would I get a costume?
Shampoo: Oh, baby, do I have you covered.
Ryoga: Can I bring Akane?
Ryoga: Wait, can I do the masked man thing?
Shampoo: You’ll have a mask alright.
Ryoga: No, I mean, the thing where we meet at a party and she doesn’t recognize me and I talk to her and she falls in love with me, and the next day I reveal myself!
Ryoga: This is brilliant! Shampoo, thank you so much!!!
Shampoo: wut.
Shampoo: Nm, you are going to look so hot in this costume you probably will score with Akane.
Kodachi’s Journal
All Hallows Eve
The most wretched of days
When man’s sins run amuck
Lust in the corner with the slutty nurses,
Gluttony lurking by the candy bowl,
Sloth hidden in the cheap hoodies and ski masks
Pride catching on the sequins and cardboard
Of those most fanciful designs
Envy trailing just behind them
Greed stretched across the faces of those
Who would make a quick buck
On shoddy material and cheap sugar
And wrath
Anywhere you don’t expect
Waiting to spring out at you
On the only night of the year when a murder in a ally
Might be performance art
I’m staying in my room,
Windows barred
Poker drawn
Netflix blazing.
Ranma’s Diary
I’m so glad I threw together a costume this year.
There was this really big party, which Kuno of all people clued me in on, cause he was eating breakfast with his sister, and they were talking about how neither of them wanted to go to this big party (although once I got there…well, that’s none of my business), so I asked around and kicked my costume making into high gear.
I had a cape. It was rad.
I don’t regret the costume, but I’m not sure how I feel about how I acted. Bad. But what kind of bad?
Okay, lemme unpack this.
I go to the party. It’s intense. Huge house, filled to the brim with loud, angry, horny, sweaty college students, most of them wearing masks. You walk inside and you get a contact high. I danced for a while, found some people I see at the gym a lot, and that really cool guy who is probably keeping me from failing math, but then I thought, ‘I need a real buzz’, and even I wouldn’t blame myself for having a few sips at a party like this.
Cause I wasn’t Ranma Saotome who has to watch his weight and stay hydrated.
Nah. I was BATMAN.
So I get a beer, and as I’m opening it I bump into someone, and it’s Zelda. And who hasn’t wanted to hit on Zelda? So she says, “Can you grab me one?” and I pass her the already open beer and say, “As you wish my liege,” except I said it in a batman voice.
And do you know what she fucking says?
She laughs and says, “I love that voice.”
“Oh really?” Which is lame, but I said it in the voice, so it was all good.
“Yeah,” And she looks at her beer, and then takes a swig, and I can tell she’s a little embarrassed but she says this anyway, she says, “Batman is really sexy. Not like I want to marry him and deal with his issues, but, I get why Catwoman is always throwing him up against walls.”
Which meant she was calling me sexy.
So I say, “Don’t you think Link might get a little suspicious when the heir to the throne has black hair?”
And I thought she would say something about at least pointy ears running in the family, but instead she got a little closer and said, “I think Link’s busy banging that Zora girl.”
And I said, “Good, because his princess is going to be in another bedroom.”
Which is when she shoved me a little, you know, playfully, and said, “Slow down. Let her majesty finish her beer first.”
When she shoved me I could feel how strong she was. Like, it was probably a challenge for her to not knock me into the drink table. Fuck that was hot.
So we go into the kitchen and talk, me still totally doing my batman voice because I am not about to drop a good thing when I have it. She was pretty cool. We didn’t talk about much, just school, and video games, and comics, which was all in between me flirting with her as hard as I could.
Then she finished her beer, and she put it down very slowly and she said, “There is a trampoline out back, but no one is out there because they think it’s too cold.
Like many college boys, I would gladly freeze my nads off to kiss Zelda.
So we go outside, and there was some light from the stars and the kitchen windows, but where the trampoline is it was pretty dark. We bounced onto it, and kind of rolled around a little before we got into a good kissing position, with her on top and my mask shoved up to the top of my head, and we got a lot of short, stuttery, laughing kisses, and it was great
For like five seconds, before I smelled it.
I mean, there was the weird rubber plastic smell of the trampoline, and me, and my sweat, and the rubber of my mask, and the cheap fabric smell of at least one of our costumes, but then her hair slipped out from under her wig, releasing the scent of her perfume and shampoo. Something in my brain short circuited and I was back on Akane’s bed with ten quilts on top of me, instead of on a trampoline with Akane on top of me.
I keep thinking I should have known somehow. Even with the wig and the make up and yelling over the music, some part of me should have known I was talking to Akane before I was tongue deep in her.
So then I panicked and shoved her off of me, and for a second she was lying there on the trampoline, and I was sitting up panting, because what the fuck had I done?, and she said, “Are you alright?” and it was so exactly her voice, it was so so obviously her, because who else could sound that worried about some rando she was making out with on a trampoline?
I ran. Tore through the garden, jumped a fence, and I was gone.
I can’t tell her. Maybe she doesn’t hate me as much as she used to, but this would just bring all those shitty memories roaring back, right? She would be pissed and betrayed, and no matter what I said about me having no idea until that second, she would never believe me.
Okay, so that’s decided. I just won’t tell her about it and it’ll be like it never happened.
Ranma, that is a great plan.
Latest post from fuckboisgetmoney.tumblr.com
A picture of Nabiki’s legs in sheer black pantyhose and sky high red heels. The picture ends just as the curve of her thigh becomes her ass, and there are some huge pink feathers curling over the top of her thigh.
#her name was lola…. #I still love this costume
Last five posts from okinomiyakimeansiloveyou.tumblr.com
5. A selfie of Ukyo in an Ichigo costume, with five more pictures of her huge replicas of Ichigo’s two swords. #shit you can’t get away with in highschool!
4. A neon colored deluge of artfully arranged candy wrappers
3. A photo of Shampoo looking adorable as Sailor moon in her “by the power of the moon” pose. Then another of her leaning against her bed, boots sprawled out in front of her, looking far more relaxed than Usigai ever did.
2. A picture of Shampoo putting her hair up in sailor moon buns. Her hair has already been parted and now she has gathered half of it in her hand, strands spilling out between her fingers. Only half her makeup is on. Red lipstick, but naked lids. You can just see the bright orange cover of Ukyo’s phone reflected in the mirror she’s using.
1. Read more
———————————————————————————————-
I think that was the most….eventful Halloween I’ve ever had.
It was a really cool party, and some guy asked me if I knew knife tricks, and fuck if I’m bringing TWO swords to a party and not knowing any tricks. I was having a really good time, and drinking mildly spiked soda, so I had a little buzz, I had a little sugar rush—and that was when I saw him.
Tuxedo Mask.
He was leaned up against the kitchen doorway, and he could not have looked more perfect if he tried. I went right up to him, stuck a sword in his face and said, “You have to meet my friend.”
Even Tuxedo Mask doesn’t argue when Ichigo Kurosaki has him at knifepoint. I mean, Ichigo is totally winning that fight.
I must have dragged that guy over the whole house, but we could not find Shampoo. He was getting more and more impatient, but I kept insisting that he had to meet my friend.
Then we were in the backyard. Just us and some dark shapes, and the flickering lights from the kitchen.
“Was this a joke?” Tuxedo Mask asked me.
I think a lot of things happened at once. Running all over the house caused my sugar high to crash, and I think I’m a weepy drunk, and I felt so stupid. I saw this guy and suddenly I’m writing a romance novel in my head. Like he and Shampoo were going to see each other, their eyes would meet, and they would fall madly in love. It just seemed so perfect.
I’m such an idiot. I had thought that for some reason Halloween could make love real, but something like love isn’t going to start existing because of matching costumes.
I started crying, and I think that freaked Tuxedo Mask out a bit.
“I’m sorry!” I blubbered. “I swear my friend was here dressed as Sailor Moon!” and then I think I said that stuff I just wrote about love and halloween.
Instead of running for the hills, which I would have understood at that point, Tuxedo Mask said, “How can you not believe in love?” Which was properly Tuxedo Mask-y, but not what I wanted to hear.
“Love isn’t something worth believing in.” I snapped.
“But it’s apparently worth grabbing strangers at parties. I don’t know how long you’ve known this girl, but already you seem to love her very much.”
That made me stop crying for a minute. I squinted at him, trying to see past his mask and the shadows of the backyard. I hadn’t noticed before, but he wasn’t wearing a domino, like the real tuxedo mask. His mask covered almost everything but his mouth.
He gave me the hanky from his pocket, and patted my head, like he wasn’t sure how to comfort humans. That thought made me laugh, and then his hand slipped a little and cradled the back of my skull. The atmosphere between us shifted. It wasn’t romantic or sexual. It was that feeling when someone touches you at a spot where your skin is stretched thin over your bones and your body asks you if you should smash their skull in before they get yours, or if you can relax.
I relaxed.
It was so comforting I almost forgot all that stuff about love and destiny. Right then it just felt good to have a cool breeze on my tear tracks and a kind person touching me.
Tuxedo Mask smiled, and swept towards the kitchen door, saying, “I see my job here is done.”
It took me a minute to get it, but I yelled before he went back inside, “You didn’t do anything!”
I hadn’t stopped laughing when Shampoo found me.
To: TKuno
From: NabikiTendo
Thought you might like to look at these before I send them to the dean. Do you think I should edit them a little or just send them as is?
Attachment: Two photos. One of Kuno, who is clearly himself, even in a loose kimono and face paint that makes him look like an opera mask. He’s in a poorly lit dining room, standing in front of a beer pong game, although it’s not clear if he’s playing or not.
The next one has Nabiki sitting on his lap in a showgirl outfit that is mostly feathers and a leotard. His paint is a little smeared, and he looks like he would fall over if the chair he was sitting on didn’t have a back. He doesn’t have an arm around Nabiki’s back, as courtesy would demand since she is sitting sideways, because he is holding both her drink and his own. Quite enough evidence for the kendo team to cut him for failing to adhere to the guidelines of the club.
From: TKuno
To: NabikiTendo
What do I have to pay you?
From: NabikiTendo
To: TKuno
You don’t. I will release these photos whenever I see fit.
You’re paying back my sister in fear and stress and wondering when your life will be ruined.
From: TKuno
To: NabikiTendo
What did I ever do to your sister? Didn’t I fight for her honor recently.
From: NabikiTendo
To: TKuno
If you hadn’t gone prying into my sister’s life she never would have been forced out of the closet.
Stew on that while you wonder if I’ve already sent the photos to your father.
P.S. I can’t believe you thought I didn’t recognize you. You deserve it all for falling for that ‘do you work out?’ line.
MY DIARY:
Dear Diary,
Today I did something I am deeply ashamed of.
I went to Nabiki Tendo on my hands and knees and begged.
I have never felt less dignified in my life than I did, my nose not one inch from the worn linoleum of her floor, breathing the scent of fear and regret (which was remarkably similar to fruity perfume and sweaty feet).
“Kuno, babe,” She said, drawing the word out like she was a gangster from an old movie, “There is nothing you could give me that I want more than this.”
“Please, Nabiki Tendo,” I said, trying to meet her eyes, only to see her silhouette against the fluorescent light, “Do not take kendo from me. It has given me everything.”
She shrugged, “You did this to yourself.”
Which is shamefully true. I did go to a party and partake in alcoholic beverages underage, of my own volition.
And, what Nabiki Tendo doesn’t know, is that this is was a ritual of mine. It is the one night of the year I do foolish things. I drink, and I speak in a throughly ungentlemanly way to young women, although I try to refrain from being a lout, and I get to pretend I am one of the great samurais from my dramas.
For the last three years it has been the perfect way to relax and resist doing something even more foolish.
I got cocky. That is all I can say. I saw Nabiki Tendo, and I panicked, of course, but when she did not seem to recognize me I fell right into her trap. I thought it would be my little secret. Whenever Nabiki Tendo berated me I could think, ‘Ah, but little do you know that you once sat in my lap and pressed your cleavage into my chin with a gusto I have never known before’. The cleavage part is still true, but I am too concerned about losing my scholarship, status, friends, and the codes I live for to enjoy it.
“There must be something I can offer you.” I tried, once more, “I would run around campus naked, I would destroy your  enemies, I would give my father a dressing down in front of the entire school. Please do not do this to me.”
Nabiki Tendo was sitting in the swivel chair at her desk as I knelt before her, and she swiveled to the side so she could place her ankle on my shoulder. Her toes are absurdly long and painted devil red. The woman is related to demons, mark my words.
“All I want is to see you doing this for a little while. Then, whenever I get bored, I’ll send the pictures in. I mean, you can come in here every night and do this whole spiel, and whenever I get tired of it you can do it for your dad.”
At that I rose swiftly and dramatically, an action whose drama was somewhat lessened by the fact that it threw Nabiki Tendo backwards and she smacked her head against the wall and I had to make sure she was alright before I could continue. (Take it from a man who has sustained many, head injuries are no joke).
“I see you leave me no choice, Nabiki Tendo, since you will not accept my offer of a fair trade, I will have to create an unfair one.”
“The fuck does that mean?” She said as I turned on my heel to leave, sounding utterly uninterested in my threat.
“It means,” I replied over my shoulder, “That I shall have to find something horrible about you and create mutually assured destruction.”
Nabiki Tendo snorted and turned back to her computer. Her parting words to me were, “Using cold war terms won’t make you any scarier, buddy.”
Now I must do something even more shameful than groveling at Nabiki Tendo’s feet: I must find out something about her that is so awful she will give me those photos back in the hopes that my knowledge will never being released to the public. This is not the sort of errand I ever wished to dirty my hands with, but now it is the only thing to be done.
Facebook Messenger:
Shampoo: You never told me how Halloween went. Did you get to seduce Akane Masked Man Style?
Ryoga: No. I never told you because it didn’t work out like I’d hoped. I did see Akane, but she seemed distracted, and since I couldn’t tell her who I was she got bored with me and left.
Shampoo: :( Boo. I was really rooting for you guys. Guess there’s nothing left to do but ASK HER OUT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON.
Ryoga: You do not get to yell at me—you encouraged me! Also, YOU ARE CONSIDERING PROPOSITIONING YOUR ROOMMATE, SOMETHING WHICH NEVER ENDS WELL!!!
Shampoo: I am not! I mean, I would ask her on a date LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, but she doesn’t do dating anymore. After one bad breakup! I broke up with a guy I was young and stupid enough to think I was in love with, and yeah, he’s still hanging around, and yeah, I’m going to have to spend most of Thanksgiving break with him, but, like, I moved on.
Ryoga: How bad was it?
Shampoo: It wasn’t bad. Just stupid. It was really stupid. We were dating, like, our whole lives. I don’t know why. It was one of those marriage proposals on the playground things, and I never started to dislike Mousse or feel like we were growing apart, or like being without him would be better than being with him, but we were in our senior year and he basically said, “When do you think we’ll get married?” and I realized that all I ever wanted Mousse to be was some guy I dated in high school.
Shampoo: So I dumped him.
Ryoga: Okay, so, basically, it was nothing like what happened to Ukyo, yet you’re comparing it to what happened to Ukyo.
Shampoo: Okay, it wasn’t the same thing, but it wasn’t a clean break, either. You’ve had a rough breakup before, right?
Ryoga: No, but I’m probably due.
Shampoo: Well, trust me, a bad breakup does not suddenly make you aromantic or asexual. It may make you wish you were, but it doesn’t, and Ukyo needs to understand that she isn’t automatically going to get hurt because she puts herself out there again.
Ryoga: Would you care this much if you weren’t interested in her?
Shampoo: She is a wonderful person, and she is doing the world a disservice by acting like she murdered love and must forever repent for her sin.
Ryoga: She would not like that analogy.
Shampoo: Tell me you haven’t noticed how pretty she is. Or how nice or sweet or funny.
Ryoga: She is very sweet. She has a nice neck when she puts her hair up.
Shampoo: Very random compliment, but I’m glad you understand.
Ryoga: Careful, you don’t want me turning into your competition.
Shampoo: Don’t get greedy pretty boy, I know you’re already trying to juggle two girls at once.
Ryoga: 1. HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT??!! 2. Do you really think I’m pretty?
Shampoo: Dude, we’re friends on facebook. I got a ‘you have a mutual friend’ notification, and you may have scrubbed your profile, but your girlfriend sure didn’t.
Shampoo: Also, obviously you’re pretty. Although I should probably be calling you dirty boy, or pig boy or something, since you think you can have all the girls.
Ryoga: Oh, god, please don’t tell Akari. I’ve been meaning to, the time just hasn’t been right.
Shampoo: Not that I actually want to be involved, but what you should really be worried about is me telling Akane.
Akane’s Diary
Do not watch the dark knight trilogy because you’re desperate, do not watch the dark knight trilogy because you’re desperate do not watch the dark knight trilogy bec
To be fair, I’m mostly bored. Everyone is exhausted, because if they’re not worrying about finals they’re still burnt out after Halloween. Meanwhile I’ve got all my homework done, and it’s just not worth it to freak out about finals before Thanksgiving break. Refusing to worry about finals until it’s over is what Thanksgiving break is for.
Still, I shouldn’t go looking at everything batman related like that’s going to bring this guy back, or explain what the fuck happened.
He was nice. Like, he recognized the absurdity of making out on a trampoline, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t trying really, really hard. That was sweet, that earnestness.
I don’t know. I spent like an hour with him. It’s stupid, building him up as this perfect guy, but I can’t help it. I know he was fun to talk to, and even with my Zelda armor digging into my shoulders I felt comfortable with him, but because I know nothing about him I can fill in the gaps with whatever I want. I can pretend he’s an only child, and he won’t freak out when I tell him I’m trans, and he likes the idea of being married and having kids, but probably only two, because he understands I think it’s good for a kid to have a sibling, but two is plenty, and….
See? Too easy.
Maybe he’s in a relationship and a wave of guilt hit him.
Or maybe he remembered he had to feed his cat.
Or maybe he had an anxiety attack.
Or maybe I’m going to watch the dark knight trilogy because between that and thinking about this guy all night I should probably chose the option that’s easier on my sanity.
From TKuno
To: Dean
Sir, as one of your students I would like to bring to your attention that another student, Nabiki Tendo, has been selling contraband out of her dorm room and has probably made thousands selling alcohol and other drugs to minors.
Sincerely,
Tatewaki Kuno.
From Dean
To TKuno
Kuno, why did you put this in a email? Is this a prank? Nabiki Tendo has been accused of this several times before, but her room has never turned up any contraband materials, nor has anyone every given us any proof that she sells contraband.
You wouldn’t be trying to harm another student for some petty reason, would you?
From Tkuno
To Dean
I’m sorry, that was foolish of me. I know that Nabiki Tendo is not the sort of person who would be caught doing things like that. I was being thoughtless. I will consider my words more carefully next time.
From TKuno
To Ghostunkugi
Is it true that you can compile an account of another person’s life for a fair price?
From Ghostunkugi
To TKuno
All social media accounts, anything on public record related to them in anyway, and any thing else that seems interesting. 150
Shadowing, 100 for a day, 650 for a week
Photos +50 dollars every day. 150 for a full week.
Confidentiality assured, unless you murder someone and I have to talk to the cops again.
From TKuno
To Ghostunkugi
Just the first option for now. I will throw in a bonus if you can find any potentially life ruining information.
From Ghostunkugi
To Tkuno
One of those jobs. I get it. [Paypal information] Please pay in a prompt manner. Due to school I probably won’t have a complete file until after Thanksgiving Break.
Kodachi’s Journal
I fear that that which I once loved
That flower that bloomed so boldly
Is wilting in my hands.
Now that our yearly cycle has spun us into
Those brief six weeks
When we all pretend to care about
Peace, love, and good will toward men
(even our families)
It makes me realize that the spring of our love
Gave way not to a passionate summer
But to the bleakness of a winter without you
Ranma
I trace your name on fogged windows at my gymnasium
But I worry I have sucked all strength from it
Like a sweet drained of it’s syrupy filling.
I shall take my time in repose
With my father and brother
And wrapped in their tenuous, florid, masculine embrace
I recall that all men appreciate a swift hard strike when they least expect it.
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suckerstevie-blog · 7 years
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yo yo yo this is hella late but i’m gwyn, here’s my intro, im literally writing this while walking out the door and i’ll be back eventualllyyyy ! 
( gigi hadid, she/her, cisfemale ) haven’t you met stevie hakim from the bronx? gg calls them sucker punch on her blog. i’m sure you’ve seen the posts. apparently she was disowned by her upper east side family after tarnishing their reputation. you might know of her as volatile and unrefined based on what gg has to say, but she can also be resilient and down-to-earth. she is twenty one and spends her days boxing professionally and teaching kids to box here in manhattan.
Growing up, Stevie had everything a kid could want. a lavish house in the upper east side where she could roam the exciting city -- going to the huge toy shop, riding horse carriages in the streets, hopping on beds in the Plaza. Once the childlike delights began to fade, she realized that there was nothing of substance. Her love for her family was only replenished when they’d buy her things to occupy her time, and when she realized this, she opted to focus on the humanity of her parents. Though, once she learned there wasn’t much humanity to work with, she uncovered her parents true colors. 
Her father had good intentions but never put them to good use. He’s a stockbroker for Wallstreet, and certainly provides for his family but it’s merely an obligation, there was no emotion to it, at least it was rarely shown. Her mother made her money selling her own line of skin care products, and with the help of her husband’s entrepreneurial skills and influence, she was able to make a pretty penny on her business. They were dubbed a power couple by the higher-up families of New York but were unknown in the press -- that is until their daughter came of age to stir up some trouble. 
As Stevie started to come to terms with her parents’ top priority a.k.a. their reputation, she soon became their enemy #1. It started with misdemeanors at her private school and turned to secret escapes to the city to do hell knows what with hell knows who. Her late night train trips to the Bronx turned into day trips which turned to more time there than at home. She made real friends in the Bronx, people who were unaware of her family’s wealth and accepted her budding personality. Though her main motivation to go to the Bronx was the booming boxing scene. There, she witnessed some of the best fighters she’s ever seen, and was inspired to say the least. She soon found a coach, Darrell, who not only taught her everything she knows but became a true father figure to her. 
At 16 she began to spiral a bit, getting into some more unhealthy habits as her friends were. More alcohol consumption, cigarettes, weed, even cocaine. Though the worst mistake was when she was 17 and got involved with a guy she met in the Bronx, who videotaped them having sex without her consent and posted it online.
Her sex tape gave her quite the following, and she was in a few newspapers and the local news. “Stockbroker’s Daughter in Sex Tape Scandal.” The writers of these stories couldn’t help but tie in her other transgressions into one sinful bow. Her name was even a hashtag on twitter, and unfortunately, a top search on pornhub. Her father did everything he could to purge the incident but it made a mark on the public’s minds and memory -- at least, thanks to her father’s leverage, there is no longer proof on the internet, and the asshole who wronged Stevie is behind bars. Though she is not at fault, the incident was the last straw for her parents. They were sick and tired of her rebellious antics and would not stand to let them tarnish their once pristine reputation any longer, so they formally disowned her. 
At first she was devastated, abandoned by her own blood and all her hard work she put into her boxing career would be undermined by one video. She was crushed, but not broken. She focused her anger and negativity into the ring and vowed not to let her parents nor any boy interfere with her life again. She’d pretend her opponents were the assholes on the internet hiding behind a screen or the pigs on the streets who’d follow and harass her. Sometimes she’d even imagine her punching bag was her dear old parents. Soon her anger was nearly out of control. She’d pick a fight with anyone who’d stand in her way or looked at her funny, and being undefeated didn’t encourage her to stop anytime soon. Though sure enough, she came to a point where she bit off more than she could chew. 
One time at a bar during her senior year, a guy started to chat her up to which she, at first, kindly turned down. Though as he started to get more and more persistent and touchy she stood her ground. Soon his sweet nothings turned to personal insults and she ending up getting in a full fledged fight with him. She was able to get a few punches and kicks in and cause some serious damage, but before she knew it, she was held by his crew with a gun at her temple. They took this opportunity to start wailing on her and they threw her unconscious body in the alley behind the bars.
Once again, she was the talk of the town after she was identified and hospitalized. She had 2 broken ribs, a broken leg, a concussion, and countless cuts and bruises -- nothing too severe but she’d need a lot of physical therapy and time before she could ever box again. Her parents had the decency to pay for her hospital bill but never once visited her, not wanting to start something they couldn’t finish. 
After a seemingly endless recovery period, she was able to get back in the ring. She was shaky at first, even hopeless that she’d never fight the same again, but she found a new muse. Instead of using her anger from her past fuel her fight, she motivated herself with her own growing confidence. She also managed to repeat senior year and graduate high school. 
Stevie is currently on a healthier path with her luck is starting to turn around, exchanging her infamy for fame. She’s as strong as ever, perhaps even stronger in the ring. She’s taken up a job teaching kids to box in Manhattan while living in the Bronx. She’s relatively drug free and she has more control of her anger. However, her fury does slip out if instigated enough, especially when someone she loves is threatened. 
personality:
+ traits: courageous, athletic, down-to-earth, tough, protective, realistic, resilient, fearless
- traits: aggressive, cutthroat, impulsive, ruthless, possessive, moody, short-tempered
headcannons:
80% of the time you’ll see her with a lollipop in her mouth, another reason why her nickname in the ring is sucker punch. 
also 95% of the time her hair is up, the only she really takes it down is on really cold winter days, showering, etc. 
says fight me and means it 
confident to the point of outright narcissism but also pretty self-deprecating 
I’ll add more later probably lol, like this for a plot and i cant wait to start! :)
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interludedahyun · 8 years
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Family Scare
Reader x Wroetoshaw
Requested? wroetoshaw/Harry x reader where he comforts you after one of your family members has a health scare?? obviously not anything serious or triggering pls
a/n: I’m not sure how well this came out…. I don’t watch Harry often honestly, his yelling is a bit much for me tbh so I don’t know how to write him. It’s also very short because I didn’t know how to prolong it as I’m hella tired and need to do homework
THANKS FOR REQUESTING | IF YOU’D LIKE TO REQUEST AN IMAGINE DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He suffered the obvious concussion from the blow to his head, a few gnarly scars, but Jackson should be good to leave in a couple hours.” Your brother said.
“You sure?” you ask nervously. “Honestly, Y/N he will be completely fine and I’ll even send you hourly texts to keep you updated, alright?”
“Okay, thank you! Please tell him I love him and I’ll be back tomorrow night.”
“Alright, have fun with Harry while it lasts okay. Bye.”
“Bye.” Biting your lip you turn around to where your current boyfriend was engaging in a heated FIFA match with a couple of mates. You knew that Freddie (your other brother) would take care of Jackson, but as the oldest sibling you felt it was your duty to take care of them and you weren’t there. After your parent’s death, things got extremely complicated. They had wanted to take Jackson from you and Freddie (both of you over the age of 18). He was only 10, who had just lost both his parents and they wanted to put him in a new environment? That obviously wasn’t happening, so you took custody of him.
You were the mom of the bunch and whilst you were away to visit Harry, he had gotten hurt. It seemed only right to feel guilty, you were supposed to be there for him at all costs and instead you were here having fun. Of course, you can have fun, but you had someone else to be responsible for. It was just a sucky feeling to have in a moment as bittersweet as the last night you’d see your boyfriend for a few months.
“THAT WAS FUCKING BULLSHIT! REF! CMON, REF!”
You’d of normally laughed at Simon’s rage, but not tonight. “Sorry, guess I’m just that good.” Everybody could practically hear the smirk present on Harry’s face, everyone but you. You were staring at the floor with a deep look on your face, “Babe, you good?”
Looking up you couldn’t help but have tears in your eyes. He’s up in an instant and cradling you to his room. “Hey, what’s happened? What’d Freddie have to say?” Breaking down you cry/hiccup your sentence out, “Jackson is in Hospital. He’s gotten a concussion and I wasn’t there to soothe him. What kind of makeshift mom am I? He got hurt while I was away from him and now Freddie is there too keep him company, but I want to be there for him.”
“Hey, hey. It’s okay. Freddie is gonna be able to take care of him for the time being and when you go home tomorrow you can love Jackson all night long. You are a great step-in mom, Y/N! You do the absolute best to make sure he has a nice life and that’s the best anyone can do.”
 “But I can’t comfort him, like I normally do when he gets hurt.” You sniffle. 
“We both know that he misses you loads and so does Freddie, but that doesn’t mean any of this is your fault.” While kissing you softly on the head and rubbing your arms.
“I know, it’s just that he’s like my little baby and I’m not there for him.”
“I know, I know. But you get to see him tomorrow and you can show just how much you love him, even though he probably already knows that.”
Harry always seemed to know exactly how to make you feel better. He knew what you needed to hear in order to be the best step in mom you could possibly be and that’s what you did when you went back home.
 ~~~~~~~~
IM NOT VERY PROUD OF THIS BUT HERES THE HARRY IMAGINE I SAID I’D TRY TO WRITE FOR THE ANON WHO ASKED
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