#im not going to clean any mess the dog made but it does sound weird hearing her move around

[kawaiianimeredhead]

Really conflicted about hearing my housemates dog making noise in her room...

[caandlelit]

omg werewolf matsukawa elaborate i want dem hcs

ok so ive got this horrible word doc with my jambled mess of a concept for this witch makki werewolf matsun fic im writing its like 3% done expect it within 2 business years

(edit. this post is too long but i cant stop typing this is good)

werewolf matsun is the SEXIEST idea ever anyone thats done it is doing gods work because that shit is hot . its fucking sexy okay

in my barely formed au he becomes a werewolf in third year

he hears about weird sounds in the forest at night ok

and he convinces witch hanamaki that they shld camp out and see what it is 

because he’s been so interested in the witchy supernatural shit since even before he met him 

and hanamaki is like okay fine But im wearing my warding pendent and matsukawa is like WHEN WILL U ADMIT YOU’RE A WITCH and hanamaki, mid-putting on his witch hat, ruffles his hair and says idk what ur talking about

they camp out and they’re just bantering and its cute and fun for 2 hours then

matsun hears growling and snapping noises and he’s like hanamaki stay in the fuckin tent 

and obviously hanamaki is like on god that is the stupidest thing uve ever said issei no

 and matsukawa steps outside and he holds a hand back to stop makki and he steps out and looks around, eyes narrows 

and he’s like … straightening up and furrows his brows and ‘theres nothing here’ 

and he feels like everything is slow and odd and unreal and he turns and sees bright, yellow eyes and he hears the snarl and jerks back 

and he’s being attacked and leaped upon and he shouts curses and screams and theres sharp teeth at his side and the smell of matted fur 

and hanamaki sprints out and ?? magic spells it away (leave me alone) 

what is the spell? what kindof witch is hanamaki? what does he say?

(begone thot!) 

the wolf creature howls and thuds off, fast and loping and hanamaki turns and he’s panicked and is like ‘issei? oh FUCK’

matsukawa is like fuck fuck fuck 

leaning against a tree and lightheaded and he collapses, head back against the trunk and sweat pouring down his temples, iron in his mouth where hes biting his tongue to keep from scremaing at the sharp pain

touches his side and his fingers come away bloody 

his breath is heavy and hes like takahiro im dying 

and hanamaki’s dropping down beside him and lifts his arm and says shut the fuck up you’re not dying you asshole and hes sniffling 

and matsuns like im sorry i dragged u out here and hanamaki’s like shut up shut up. issei. shit . issei you were right 

and hes like wh what was i right about and hes like you were right. im a witch . and youre not fucking dying here, asshole

issei mumbles fuck yeah and does like a little fist pump

and he whispers a spell to carry him over back to his house 

and he bandages him up and matsun is tired and in pain and staring at him in the moonlight 

MONDAY

go to school and matsun has white bandages wrapped around his side hidden under his shirt and hes a little scraped up even though hanamaki healed and cleaned up as much as he could

someones like oooh matsukawa your arm is scraped up wtf 

and hes like yeah man i got in a fight to protect takahiros honor 

makki’s like yeah…. :/// he lost 

and matsuns like shut up asshole and theyre laughing and theyre good theyre okay 

half way through the school day, long and tired and the bell seems louder and harsher and shriller and everything is too bright and loud and making his eyes and ears hurt 

in the bathroom matsun takes off the tape bc hes feeling nauseous and everything feels a little too much for some reason hes assuming bc of the wound, maybe its infected

and he checks it while hes inside and the bandages come off and 

its clean no bite no blood no mark 

and he stares at it and says what the fuck and texts hanamaki 

and hanamaki sees the text and its just ‘SOS BATHROOM NOW PLELASE’ 

asks his teacher to let him go to the bathroom and he steps into the bathroom and matsun spins around and gestures at his side and chest wordlessly 

hanamaki like blinks at the sight of matsuns abs and then blinks again at the healed skin and hes like what the fuck  

so

he has sharper vision and sense of smell and hearing 

and hes like takahiro……..everything feels horrible and too much and hanamaki’s like ok so what do u want me to do knock u out so u don’t feel anything? and matsukawa’s like huh actually and hana’s like Shut up Dumbass

werewolf matsukawa suddenly stronger and hanamaki so so bitter about it ignoring his personal ‘im attracted to him’ feelings and pretending hes mad abt the super strength

matsukawa’s eyes glinting yellow on occasion and hanamaki trying not to scream bc god that’s sexy

the day they see the healed skin they like walk home silent and shell shocked 

matsukawa staring hollowly at the sidewalk his posture lost

hanamaki squinting off into the distance

makki opening his mouth angrily at one point

only to close it defeatedly bc he cant even……

a conversation in hanamaki’s bedroom along the lines of 

‘issei why is my life literally teen wolf why am I stiles from teen wolf’ 

matsun perks up ‘oh that’s dylan o briens character right? does that make me derek !!!’ 

and hanamaki turns from where hes muttering angrily and squints at him and says slowly

‘why the fu- dude? u r scott ??? because u are a FUCKING WEREWOLF ??????? why would u be derek ???? ur my best friend that turned into a GODDAMN WEREWOLF-‘ 

‘okok calm down hiro fine fine chill out‘ 

matsuns like slumping like ‘ugh, scott. i don’t wanna be scott hes painfully straight-‘ 

and hanamakis like throwing his hands up and shouting like ‘SO THEN !! why would u want to be derek!!!’ 

and issei’s like ‘…….nevermind we r not in the state to have a conversation about teen wolf, a show neither of us finished and obviously dont have any knowledge about’

im gonna have it properly set in 2013 itll be so cringey and fun

matsukawa also has insomnia and and gets migraines sometimes 

and hanamaki’s witchy incense smelling house and bedroom having him nodding off so easily and he sleeps over a lot 

especially after he gets bitten, because the migraines get worse

moreso near the full moon

and he comes in through the window and hanamaki is half asleep but always automatically pulls up his blanket and lets him in

big spoon matsun

he curls into his chest as best as he can, pressed tight between the wall and matsukawa

also i have this 

italics: makki

bold: mattsun

list of signs pointing towards issei probably being a werewolf: 

got bit by a giant dog-creature the bite mark disappeared next day (???? freaky shit)

sudden super healing and durability (useful for when oikawa serves the ball into your head – lmfao)

sudden heightened senses (my headaches r .. multiplying - :( )

sudden super strength (fuck u issei – i didn’t ask to be bitten takahiro – oh no u were bitten how sad for u and ur six pack – the werewolf actually decided i deserve super strength bc of how cool i am – and immeasurable pain every full moon too huh ???? – ...sacrifices were made)

90% sure he got stupider – sign of a dog brain ?? (FUCK OFF – do u want me to explain what a percentage is <3 – no </3)

hair growth (wtf does that mean ??? – it means i suddenly have more chest hair its very weird – ngl to u u were already pretty hairy -  fucker)

eyes turn yellow sometimes (wait, really????? – yes its so fucking weird – that sounds fucking epic actually – no comment)

big dick energy went up the ROOF (ok that’s enough asshole – tell me im lying hiro.)

edit: ok the full moon happened we’re all traumatized and hes definitely a FUCKING werewolf.

ill finish this as a fic one day ill post when i do

might also make a useless porno oneshot with just werewolf matsukawa and ? possibly dancer makki im very into dancer makki atm

long post im very sorry but !!!! thanks for the ask 

[thethespacecoyote]

Did someone order more sad modern AU BenArmie? No? Too bad. 

Done for more Bad Things Happen Bingo! For “Hidden Scar” because that’s a whole load of angst fodder. Warning because this references some past and current abuse Armitage’s suffered thanks to his dad. 

Ben walks out of the bathroom, fresh from the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist, just in time to hear his phone vibrate against his desk. Puzzled, he steps over the backpack strewn across the floor and snatches it up, checking the illuminated screen to find a text from Armie.

>>> 10:47pm

are you awake?

It’s not too weird to hear from him this late at night, especially on a weekend. He and Armie text all the time, chatting about school or movies or nonsense, really. But it’s better than nothing, and Ben has few other friends he can talk with outside of classes and extracurriculars.

>>>10:48pm

sure am whats up

Ben cradles his phone in his palm as he sits on the bed, towel still draped over his thighs. The rain that’s been lashing his neighborhood all evening seems to have lessened to a trickle in the past hour, though the night outside still looks pretty cold and miserable.

His phone buzzes once more.

>>>10:48pm

would it be alright if i came over?

It’s not necessarily unusual for Armie to come over, even so late in the evening. Considering it’s the weekend, it’s even less strange, though usually they plan it out beforehand. Ben has nothing better to do, however, and having Armie over would certainly brighten a fairly dully and rainy night.

>>> 10:49pm

yeah sure lemme know when ur here

Ben tosses the phone back on the bed and rises, figuring he has a moment to get ready. He rummages through his chest of drawers for a pair of sweatpants, tying them low about his hips. His phone lights up with another notification, and he picks it back up.

>>>10:52pm

im outside. can i come up?

Outside? Already? Their houses were at least twenty minutes apart, and Armie didn’t even own a car. He had a bike but that wouldn’t shave off that much time. So how was he here?

Ben glances to his window, where droplets of water still cling and glimmer in the moonlight. At least it’d stopped raining. He hopes Armie hasn’t been waiting that long.

>>>10:53pm

one sec

Ben looks around his room, suddenly conscious of the mess. If he leaves things like this he won’t hear the end of it, so he scurries about, trying to do some last minute clean-up. He scrapes loose shirts and jeans and socks off the floor and stuffs them into the closet, before tossing couple old receipts and empty snack wrappers that’ve accumulated onto his desk into the garbage. He rolls his free weights towards the walls, getting them out of the way so Armie won’t trip on them.

Finally he pulls on a tank and hoodie, tousling his still wet hair as he heads out of his room and downstairs. He pads quietly through the house, knowing which floorboards to avoid, which doors to treat especially gently lest they creak. Both his parents should be sound asleep but it’s best not to take chances. He doesn’t want them sending Armie home if he’s already made the trip here.

He prowls to the front door and unlocks it as quietly as he can, peeking out onto the porch. The dim orange light just barely illuminates where Armie paces dully on the bottom steps with his arms wrapped tightly around his chest. He stops in his tracks and looks up when the door opens, hopping up onto the porch like a lost animal waiting for food.  

Ben thinks it’s weird he isn’t wearing a jacket, or really anything to protect him from the cold apart from a dark grey turtleneck. He can see Armie shivering, hair lightly dusted with dew, and wishes he’d brought one of his hoodies down to wrap around him. Good thing it’s warm inside the house.

“Hey.” Ben waves awkwardly, not sure what else to do with his hand. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to take so long.”

“S’okay,” Armie mumbles, arms squeezing tighter around himself. Ben stands aside to let him in, quickly closing the door behind them. His eyes fall to Armie’s back and thinks it might be good to put his hand there so he can guide his friend through the dark inside the house, but he stops himself and instead rubs the back of his neck.

“You alright?”

“Yeah. Just wanted to see you,” Armie admits, hunching his shoulders inwards as he adapts to the sudden warmth. “That’s fine, right?”

“Oh yeah. Just gonna have to explain to mom and dad in the morning.” Ben leads the way back to the staircase, stopping only briefly to nod towards the kitchen.

“You hungry or anything? We probably can’t turn on the stove or microwave without waking the parents but there’s probably some snacks or something. If you want.”

Armie shakes his head.

“No…can we just go up to your room?”

“Sure.” Ben’s still full from dinner anyway, he just wants to make sure Armie actually eats. He knows he has a tendency to skip meals for studying, or just because he forgets.

He hopes Armie won’t notice how messy his room is, as despite the earlier manic cleanup Ben knows it’s really not up to his friend’s standards. Armie’s space back at his house looks crisp and tidy, almost barely lived-in—a real contrast to Ben’s chaotic den, walled in by music posters and lit by only one lamp.

“You want me to turn something on? It’ll be fine as long as I keep the volume low.” Ben gropes for the remote on the desk when Armie hums in vague agreement, sinking down besides the other boy as he flicks on the television. Ben flips around until finding some older-looking movie he feels Armie might like. From the amount of gray men in suits that walk into frame it’s probably one of those political thriller films from the forties he’s always trying to get Ben to watch.

Well. No time like the present. Armie seems a little off, so hopefully this will cheer him up.

But when Ben looks over to him, he finds Armie’s not looking at the screen, eyes instead downcast upon where his hands fold in his lap. He hasn’t really reacted at all since sitting down, not to the television or Ben’s presence.

Concern worries in his stomach but Ben knows better not to pry when Armie’s shut off like this. They’ve been friends for years but he’s still pretty private, and tends to react fairly negatively when Ben tries to get past his walls. The only real fights they’ve ever had stemmed from that, so Ben’s learned to back off whenever Armie’s sending out serious “don’t talk to me” vibes.

Still, he can’t help but wonder where this all comes from. They’ve been friends for years but Ben doesn’t know all that much about his home life or what happened before he moved to town. Hell, Ben’s been to his house a handful of times and he’s still never met Armie’s stepmom nor any other member of his family apart from his dad

Ben’s not a fan of Brendol Hux, so he’s not quite complaining that he hardly gets a chance to visit Armie at home.

He leans back, propping himself up as he half-watches the roundtable of suits arguing on the television, wondering if he should say something but not sure what. Armie remains still, sitting on the edge of the bed with his fingers rubbing the hem of his sweater. But just as Ben opens his lips to break the silence Armie suddenly leans back and turns to rest his head against his shoulder.

Ben’s heart jumps in surprise at the sudden contact, expecting Armie to excuse this kind of intimacy like he usually does, but he stays quiet and only turns his nose against Ben’s shoulder, inhales like minute kisses against the fabric of his hoodie.

Ben watches, a little stunned. He’s never seen Armie this openly affectionate before. He’s pretty aloof about physical contact, though Ben’s got him to open up a little more in recent years. But definitely not enough for this degree of friendly cuddling. Or so he thought.

Ben wonders if something’s caused this change of heart—as well as the unexpected late night visit.

But he’s not exactly in the mood to rebuke it. Really Ben’s long pined for this kind of closeness with Armie, to fill in the last space missing in their friendship He tilts his chin down, watching the reflection of the television play across Armie’s pale skin. He can tell he’s still not watching the movie all that closely, but that hardly matters when they’re cuddled up like this.

Ben inhales slowly, careful not to disturb his resting friend too much, though the pounding of his heart might’ve already done so.

Wow. Armie’s hair smells nice. Ben hopes that’s not too weird to think that, as it’s just hard not to notice when he’s leaning against him. He turns his head slightly, inhaling the sweet scent and trying to figure out what exactly it is. Lemon, and maybe a hint of something more herbaceous.  

He doesn’t ask, honestly a little afraid to hear what Armie might say if he did. Instead, he just starts combing through his hair—at first just barely, his fingertips dipping through the feathery ginger locks like he’s afraid he might spook him. But Armie doesn’t pull away, or even comment on how Ben’s touching him. He doesn’t stiffen or twitch, only relaxing against him as Ben lightly skates his fingers against his scalp.

Soon he’s stroking through Armie’s hair properly, loving how soft it feels against his palm, how his friend almost melts against him. Just like a cat, Ben thinks with a smile, remembering the time they’d encountered a stray while walking home from school. It’d happened way back in middle school. Armie had convinced him to use his jacket to wrap up the poor thing once they’d coaxed her out from beneath a rain-soaked bush, insisting he couldn’t use his own blazer to keep the cat warm. Ben hadn’t complained, more amused by the stray’s orange coat and how closely it matched Armie’s fiery hair than upset about his sodden jacket.

He remembers they gave the cat away once she was nursed back to health. Armie had grown quite fond of her, but argued his father would never approve of a pet. Ben would’ve taken her if not for the fact that his dad already owned a dog that didn’t exactly get along well with other animals.

He knows Armie still wants a cat. Maybe someday when he moves out of his dad’s house he can have one.

Ben almost loses himself in the soothing brush of Armie’s hair. His fingers now thread at the locks close to the top of his head, properly petting him. Armie feels so loose and weightless against him, completely relaxed and trusting Ben as he touches him.

Elation fills his chest, and Ben can’t stop himself from smiling. It feels right to keep close to Armie like this, to comfort him through whatever’s going on, because something always seems to be going on with him. He wishes Armie would open up a little more sometimes and let Ben know what he’s feeling but this—this is good. This is a start.

Then his finger brushes against something strange on his friend’s scalp.

Ben pauses for a moment, fingertips feeling out the edge of something firm and raised out of Armie’s skin. But as he tries to touch more of it, lips parting in confusion, Armie tenses and jerks away from his shoulder. Ben catches a glimpse of his friend’s wide eyes and trembling lip before Armie pushes himself up off the bed. He clenches both his fists, voice hurried and wavering as he speaks.  

“I—I have to go, this was a mistake—“

Ben’s up in a flash, longer stride quickly putting him right up behind Armie, who’s trying to grasp the doorknob with shaky hands. He doesn’t quite get it turned before he’s pulling on it, jolting the door against the jamb andsending a shudder through the house that might wake up Ben’s parents. Fear jolts through the teen’s chest, and he reaches out.

“No, Armie, wait—“

Ben grabs his wrist and pulls without thinking. To his horror Armie reacts instantly, a muted cry ringing from his throat, like it’s hurt him. Ben instantly lets him go but instead of running away Armie shrinks down, arms wrapping back around his chest.

There’s some kind of shootout scene ringing on the television, the beginnings of climactic showdown between the enemy spy and the hero flashing across the carpet as Ben quickly kneels at Armie’s side, hands floating above his shoulders. He doesn’t know what to do, or whether the labored breathing wracking his friend’s body is all his fault.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” Ben stammers out the apology, struggling to find the right words. “Did I hurt you? I didn’t mean to hurt you, I’m so s—“

“N-No, no. You didn’t. You don’t have to be…” Armie clears his throat, voice returning with just a shred more composure. “I’m sorry. That…that was uncalled for.”

He tries to sit up straight, expression sudden fallen with shame at the outburst. Ben can see the wear on his face with alarming clarity now. The sallow cheeks, the bruises under his eyes and—most alarming of all—a puffy  little cut on the slope below his chin.

“I really should leave. You’re not—you don’t have to deal with me.” Armie babbles as he turns away from Ben’s gaze. His fingers anxiously stroke through his hair, trying to push the mussed locks back into their usual place.

“Don’t, please.” Ben still hesitates placing his hand on Armie’s shoulder, or anywhere else, no matter how much he wants to.

“I shouldn’t have touched you there. I’m really sorry. I didn’t know…whatever it was…I didn’t know it would freak you out so much.” He doesn’t know if any of his apologies will help get Armie to believe him, but he doesn’t know what else to do.

Gradually, Armie sits back off his knees, though his arms stay guarded around his body. He rubs his hands along the bend of his elbows, like he’s still cold despite sitting in the musty warmth of the bedroom. Ben’s heart pangs as the fabric of Armie’s sweater pulls along the thinness of his limbs.  

“It’s okay…I didn’t even think about it…It felt so nice for you to…” Armie trails off into silence, letting his eyes flutter shut. Outside the rain has started, beating a soft tattoo against the house. The movie too has reached a lulling denouement, the sounds of polished professional voices fading as Ben focuses his full attention on Armie.

He doesn’t know what’ll happen now, what he should say or do. He realizes Armie probably wants to let it go, bury it away like he always does and never speak of it again. But Ben can’t stop thinking about that thing—that scar on his head, hidden under the beguiling locks of hair.

How long has it been there?

“I just—,“ he swallows past the tightness in his throat that’s grown in the silence, “—want to help you if I can. If you need to—I mean—”

“Ben.” Armie shakes his head with a dead chuckle. “You don’t want to know about what happens.”

“But I do. If you want to tell me I—I’ll listen.” Ben finally pushes past his own hangups and reaches out, resting his hand on his friend’s knee. “I promise.”

Armie leans back against the bedroom door, shoulders rising with a weighty breath. His lips tighten together, a last ditch effort to hold back what threatens to spill out of him. Ben scoots a little closer, palm rubbing down Armie’s thigh, hoping his presence is helpful.

“My—my father has this damned ring. From his military days. Big old gaudy thing.” Armie emphasizes the shape with his hand. “Engraved and solid. He likes to wear it on his forefinger, fidget it over the knuckle.”

Ben vaguely remembers something like that from the few times he’s encountered Brendol, though he never took much notice of the specifics. The man’s a arrogant windbag, dressed with like he thinks he’s some the last beacon of aristocracy in the modern day. Always looking down his nose at those around him, even his own son—like gaudy jewelry and a pompous attitude makes him the better man.

“Things weren’t great when I was younger,” Armie continues, voice just above a drone. “I mean, they’re not great n—well, they were worse back then, right after he married my stepmother. They fought a lot. Sometimes I got in the way.”

Ben’s stomach sinks, but he dare not stop Armie, even though he dreads where this is leading. He watches as his friend swallows harshly, expression trembling.  

“I don’t remember much of it, but I know that he hit me when I tried to get them to stop once. He got so angry he…punched me in the head.” Armie mimes the action with a numb fist. “Just…like he didn’t care what might happen to me after.”

Anger flares up inside Ben at the confirmation of his worst fears, calling all sorts of terrible images to the forefront of his mind. His Armie, just a kid, indifferently assaulted by his own father. He’s always found Brendol Hux unpleasant, the tension Ben senses between him and his son all but confirmed whenever Armie complains about him. But he would’ve never guessed that the animosity ran that horribly deep.  

Armie lifts his hand to the side of his head, where Ben had found the scar, fingers twitching as if afraid to touch it, as if it still hurts him.

“I needed stitches. I was only five, and I needed thirteen stitches for what he did to me,” Armie spits.

Ben feels sick with rage. He’d only felt the edge of the ragged skin, the healed-over evidence of Armie’s pain. It must extend even further along his scalp, an inescapable reminder of what his father did to him.

“And that wasn’t the first time he did it. Or—“ Armie’s chest hitches, fists clenching in his lap. “—or the last.”

He leans his head back against the bedroom door, finally looking Ben’s in the eyes. Despite his efforts to come his hair back earlier it’s fallen across his forehead once more, looking thin and lifeless.

“Ben, it’s—it’s never going to stop, is it?” Armies voice cracks out of the dull monotone, pain and frustration finally bleeding out as tears start to collect in his already reddened eyes. “If it hasn’t stopped by now, it’s not ever going to. Not until one us of dies.”

He palms his forehead, teeth gritting around his weak sobbing.

“I wish he was dead, why can’t he just die and leave me alone?” Armie gasps, his entire body shaking as tears crawl down his cheeks.

Ben’s never seen him cry, and it hurts. It’s not like that kind of healing crying, nor tears brought about by moments of great joy. It’s frustrated and crumbling Armie down right in front of him. It’s a cry for help.

In that moment Ben’s hands itch for a fight, for anything to help him deal with the sudden furious energy rolling through his body. He feels like he could scream and throw things, maybe even march to the Hux household through the rain and beat Brendol’s face in until the storm gutters ran with blood—

—but Armie needs him. He needs Ben’s comforting presence. Not his boundless anger, or his need for vengeance.

Those will come later, when they’re rested and clear-thinking and ready to make a plan.

“Hey, shh. C’mon, don’t cry.” Ben tries to keep his voice even, to push away the rage that bubbles up for his friend’s sake. “You’re going to be alright.”

Armie snorts through his tears, disbelieving, but Ben leans in and wraps his arms around him before he can protest. He holds him close, one hand around Armie’s waist with the other pressed against the back of his head, pulling him away from the door and letting him rest against his shoulder. Ben feels him sniffle, body shivering as it slowly relaxes in his grasp.

Armie’s so much slighter than him, less bulked out with brawn—but Ben suddenly feels he’s the strongest person he’s ever met.

“I…” Ben starts, his own voice feeling roughed and hard to command as it brushes against the side of Armie’s head. “…I’m really glad you. Y’know. Came here tonight.”

It feels like a lame, inadequate thing to say after Armie’s spilled his guts out to him, but Ben can’t think of anything else. He really is grateful that his friend is here, somewhere safe and away from the monster who calls himself his father. If Ben could, he’d keep Armie here for as long as he wanted to stay. He’d never have to go back to that house where Brendol could keep hurting him.

Armie sniffs, rubbing his face against Ben’s hoodie, before carefully pulling away. Despite the tears, he looks a little better now, even managing a weak smile that goes right to Ben’s heart. He wipes at his nose with his sleeve, letting out a soft sigh.

“I probably look a mess…sorry.”

“You really, really don’t have to apologize,” Ben stresses. “It’s late. And you look real good anyway.” Armie gives him a strange glance at the admission, but Ben quickly changes the subject.

“You wanna sleep in that,” he whispers as he rubs the shoulder of Armie’s sweater, “or do you need something else to change into?”

“Uh…I’m not sure any of your clothes would fit me…” Armie sniffs, even mustering a small laugh as he presumably envisions what Ben’s closet full of hoodies and baggy jeans might look like on him.

“Well you’ll just be sleeping in them, not going to meet the Queen for tea.” Ben affects a weak impression of Armie’s accent, hoping it’ll earn him more of that smile. It does get Ben a slight, amused eye-roll which is—all things considered—close enough.

“C’mon.” He helps Armie up off the floor, guiding him back to the bed to sit. “I’ll grab you something.”

Ben scrounges in his closet, finding a pair of pajama pants he’d gotten for one Christmas and never tried on, as well as the least worn of his collection of black graphic shirts. He gives it a quick sniff, before deciding it’s clean enough for Armie to wear and holds it out to him.

“Here.”

Armie takes the clothes with only a little bit of skepticism. Ben shrugs sheepishly, smoothing his hair back.

“They’re not that bad, right?”

“Someone needs to teach you how to do laundry one of these days,” Armie tsks, even as his fingers brush affectionately over the clothing. “It’s better than nothing,” he adds after a moment.

“That’s practically a compliment from you. Now go get changed before you fall asleep in your slacks.” Ben sends him off to the adjoining bathroom, before deciding to clean up the bed a little bit more. He pulls out a pillow wedged between the mattress and the wall, fluffing it up along with the rest before brushing the covers flat and grabbing an extra blanket folded up under the bed.  

By the time he’s finished things up the bathroom light clicks off behind him. Ben turns around to see Armie crouching in the doorway, gingerly setting his old clothes and damp loafers upon the floor before shuffling towards him.

Both the shirt and pajama pants hang off his skinny frame, making Armie look a lot smaller than he actually is and—honestly?—pretty adorable. Ben’s almost thankful for the dim light in his room, because otherwise Armie might see him blushing.

“Not half bad.” Ben nods his approval, patting the covers beside him. “This could be a new look for you. We could match.”

Armie rolls his eyes and comes to sit on the bed, the cuffs of the pants pooling over his bare feet.

“I wouldn’t dare. The world doesn’t need two Ben Solos on its hands.” He smirks, before reclining back against the bed. Armie stays that way for a couple moments, chest rising and falling gently with his breath, before pulling his legs up onto the bed and curling onto his side. His hair splays out slightly over Ben’s dark bedcovers, contrast making it more vibrant. He looks so soft, so vulnerable lying in Ben’s bed, and when Armie’s eyes lift up and lock with his he’s sure his blush could glow through even the deepest darkness.

Ben shuts off the television, now playing the end of the movie’s credits, before lying down besides the other boy. Ben faces him, only a moment of doubt flickering between them before he reaches out and pulls Armie in close. Ben would’ve never dared to hold him like this before tonight, too afraid of how his friend might respond—but it feels like their relationship has shifted a little bit, at least to warrant a deeper sort of intimacy. A crack in Armie’s hardened armor has opened, and Ben fits into it perfectly.

The rain continues outside, drawing glistening patterns against the window. It looks and sounds cold, and Ben wonders if it’ll continue into the next day or break once morning dawns, showing the sun through the clouds.

He nudges his nose into Armie’s hair, hand brushing over his back and feeling the slope of his body beneath his palm. He still smells of citrus and herbs, a bright aromatic spot in the dark musk of the bedroom. Even half-sleep and clad in Ben’s spare clothing, he brightens up the space between them.

Ben curls around his best friend, the person he cares most for in his life, slipping their legs together beneath the blankets. He feels he might be pushing his luck but he wants to be as close to Armie as possible, keeping him shielded and safe from everything out there that wants to hurt him.

It’s all Ben can do for now.

[alo-piss-trancy]

SD/R2 OMO HEADCANONS (Pt1)

Decided it was probably time for me to post a list of my omo hcs for this game since I did the THH chars! Like with the other list, I'll be excluding a couple I have no interest in thinking of omo content of (in this case, Hiy/oko and Teru/teru). I'm breaking this one into multiple posts throughout the week as I compile my thoughts (I'll add a link to all of them on the fic masterlist page later so you can find them all) because I feel this is gonna be a lot longer than my THH post haha!

Here we go, the first 3 (or 4) chars! Please stop reading now if you don't want spoilers for the game bc there will be several!!!

~~~

Gun/dham:

* I firmly hc him as vegetarian (not vegan. He will consume byproducts like milk/cheese/eggs/etc, but only harvested himself or from small farms/sources that he has personally vetted/researched where he knows 100% that the creatures are treated ethically.)

* That's actually not omo-related besides milk oops but it relates to my next point, which is that for the most part he prefers Natural food/drink. Water, fruit or vegetable juices/smoothies, etc. He's not really used to strange 'Human' confections like soda or coffee, so the caffeine and diuretics hit him hard and fast and make it difficult for him to estimate how much time he has. It also makes him jittery/hyped as hell which Does Not Help.

* As long as he isn't screwed over by caffeine or a ton of drinks, he has a decently strong bladder and can hold for a long time. He has a lot of practice from hiding/waiting to help certain animals, laying trapped under sleeping cats/dogs, etc. And also avoiding public restrooms like the Plagues they are for most of the day...

* He's bladdershy AF and has been since early childhood. I saw he had signs drawn on the doors/curtain in his room during my playthrough (including the bathroom) and that is definitely his safezone. Can't go outside either bc 1. He's paranoid he'll be seen by other ppl and 2. That feels disrespectful to the nature deities despite the logic that animals do it all the time. He knows that's dumb and he hates himself for it.

* Sometimes I do like to ignore the bladdershy hc just for some variety. Even in that case tho he'd still be a bit of a diva about which public bathrooms he uses. If it's gross or weird he's gonna avoid it/complain/refuse to go even if bursting. He's stubborn af

* We all know he canonically goes commando. Therefore he is in extra danger because any leaks will go straight to his pants RIP Since he usually wears black it isn't that visable (as long as it's just a bit and not a full wetting), but if he ever has to wear smth else u know he's screwed c':

* He's not very vocal when desperate at all. Mostly strangled whines or grunts (only when alone or if so urgent he can't hide it), he's just so easily embarrassed that he can choke most sound.

* He can also hide his body language pretty well. He can manage to keep himself to rigid posture and the occasional shudder or fidget if needed. Only when he's beyond caught and about to wet will he resort to obvious grabs or dances in front of others.

* Even if he wet he wouldn't cry (I don't seem him crying much for anything tbh, barring extreme things like death). He's angry at himself and extremely ashamed. He would get red as a tomato, attempt to slink away and avoid any witnesses for several days. Could get snippy or hide in his shell all pitiful, depending on the person.

* When alone or sure he can't be caught, he'll fidget more once things are dire. Mostly his long-ass legs. Jiggling, crossing, bending at the knees or bouncing up and down, shuffling from foot-to-foot, everything. He doesn't really do much with his hands beyond a quick crotch-squeeze.

* He'd def let Haj/ime or So/nia dom tf out of him as far as making him hold/lose control, he's submissive and enjoys the challenging test of limits. However, I could also see him totally having a thing for 'marking' his partners during the times he doms.

So/nia:

* Lowkey has a bladder of steel tbh, tho you'd never expect it by looking at her. It takes a lot to get her desperate and even more for her to crack enough to show her needs to others.

* She had a lot of long lectures/lessons, meetings, social events, formal balls, etc. growing up, so she just got used to waiting a lot between breaks so as not to interrupt or be rude to her guests. This also makes her wicked good at remaining completely calm on the outside and keeping the quiver out of her tone even when she's absolutely dying.

* Even once people know her problem, she would NEVER grab herself or dance. Literally the most you'll get out of her is legs crossed at the ankles. For the most part the only sign of her desperation is the slight fullbody shivering where she has her muscles and posture strained. If you're very lucky she may wince or her voice will start shaking/get breathy (her breathing gets super fast and shallow when at her absolute limit. Like nearly hyperventilating fast).

* While not shy at all about asking/telling others where she's going, she was raised with manners. She refuses to interrupt while others are busy, and will wait until she feels the time is appropriate to but into convos or leave the room, even if that could take a long time. She will not skip out on a group task if she can help it bc she feels very strongly about doing her part and not coming off as a slacker (so group investigations/new island exploring/building for Us/ami in Island Mode are all LONG tasks she will force herself to stick out without complaint, even if she's about to wet herself).

* Despite being a princess, she definitely doesn't view anything as being 'beneath' her. If someone asks her to just go outside/in a sketchy place/strange receptacle, she'll do it without question as soon as they agree to glance away. In fact, sometimes it's actually a little thrilling.

* If she did wet herself she would certainly be embarrassed, maybe even teary-eyed depending on the situation/who was around. However, it certainly isn't the end of the world for her, and she would be able to brush it off fairly easily once she got cleaned up and had a chance to breathe. Could probably start making jokes about it by the next day, or just wait patiently for everyone to forget about it.

* Probably has a big piss kink (for others. She isn't much on doing holds herself, minus an occasional 'Damsel in Distress' type roleplay). And honestly just a big one for domming others (sometimes sweetly, sometimes cold/cruel like True Royalty). She looks cute but She Nasty (tm). Gun/dham and Haji/me (to a lesser extent, bc his smart-ass take-no-shit attitude makes him a bit of a brat sometimes lol) are her bitches.

M/ikan (I have to split hers in two bc I have polar opposite hcs) :

Non-Despair M/ikan -

* Is every bit as shy uwu ohnoooo~ as you'd imagine. Super blushy and fidgety and teary-eyed but never admits what's wrong even once it's obvious, to the point of potty-dancing in place (but she's Totally Fine she can hang in there and doesn't need to stop what she's doing)! You literally have to drag her away to the bathroom if u don't want her to have an accident. Would rather die than inconvenience anyone by telling them she has to go, will berate herself for the inconvenience when that backfires and she's made a mess of herself, 120% convinced everyone hates her and p much refuses any comfort bc she's so trapped in the spiral. Bawls her eyes out.

* If on a rare occasion she does work up the nerve to speak up and is denied, that's it. She will not dare ask again even if the person didn't realize how badly she had to go. Nope. Clearly her only option is to hold it until she can't anymore, or until she's alone and can run off by herself.

*Also she totally would whimper to herself in The Worst omo video star voice lmao "Oh noooo I'm leaking into my panties~, it's cOmIng OuTtttt~ uwu uwu uwu" (i'm not making fun of those istg but u know Exactly what 'sexy baby' voice I mean. That is Mi/kan. Don't be so fake bitch We Know u didn't fall spread eagle naturally)

* Says 'Potty' unironically. It's the only word she uses for the bathroom.

* Surprisingly not bladdershy at all. She's actually the opposite. Will go Anywhere (but will be embarrassed while doing it).

* She's used to holding a lot bc afraid to leave class/stuck helping patients for hours on end. However while she has a wicked high capacity and stays very hydrated, she has pretty shaky control. Leaks A LOT, be it in general or bc she gets startled/nervous. She's like a chihuahua lmao. She wears medical liners when on duty as a nurse or during school, but for general hangouts she forgoes them (totally bc she forgot and Not bc she wanted to show her wet panties off to strangers/peers when she falls again, that would be Slu/tty and Improper).

* Once held for ages and then ended up wetting herself just bc Hiy/oko told her to. It wasn't actually a request, just a one-off snippy comment that H forgot about like 10 min after she said it and walked away. When she found out Mi/kan took it seriously she absolutely lost it laughing for the next few days

*Her potty dances include lots of thighs rubbing together/hunching over, hands wandering dangerously close only to pause and grip her skirt/dress hem, hopping from leg to leg and shaking at the knees. She's pitiful when desperate and very cute. Pants and whimpers near constantly, nibbles at her knuckles to try and muffle it.

* Knows when she's at risk of actual damage from holding, but it's still a 50/50 shot of whether she'll break down and go or keep trying to hold. She knows it's unwise, but due to her complete lack of self worth she doesn't really care if her own body is damaged.

* That said, she monitors everyone else very closely and will harass them firmly to take breaks if they're at risk.

Despair/True Mik/an -

* MASSIVE PISS KI/NK. Loves to be dommed/told to hold until she wets. LOVES to do the same to others and tell them all the mean things for a change. She will borderline Break You.

* Takes great satisfaction in watching others struggle. If given an opportunity to make others desperate/prevent them from getting to a bathroom without revealing herself, she will definitely take it. She has no sympathy.

* The Queen of lacing things with diuretics, but can also often find that boring/too easy. A bit disdainful of that method tbh.

* Tying ppl down to hold or hooking them to IVs and 'misplacing' the call button is more her style.

* Used to hold for Jun/ko a lot to appease her. Would be willing to hold for Na/gito, but tbh he's just as willing to hold for her so it's a bit of a stalemate and they've yet to work out who does what.

* Will piss on her victim/lover while staring them directly in the eyes. Does not flinch. She toes the line between sexy and just plain creepy lol

[yourkittywilde]

stuck with me 💍❤️

TAGGING  → @yourkittywilde & @sammynolanh

TIME FRAME  → 31 March 2019 

LOCATION  → Sammy & Kitty’s apartment, LA. 

WARNINGS  → None, actually. Bad cooking?

NOTES  →  Somewhere between Kitty yelling and making fun of girl’s hair extensions, Sammy thinks it’s the perfect time to propose.  idk i’m so bad at these summaries.

KITTY

It was Kitty's first day off since moving to L.A, and honestly? She was sort of exhausted. Between TMZ and college work she'd barely had time to sleep let alone spend significant time with her boyfriend. On top of that she was trying so hard to be better for Sammy. To be more thoughtful. To be nicer. Knowing it had only been  few weeks since Sammy was sick and in an effort to avoid ordering take out, Kitty had decided to cook. However somewhere between the boiling water spilling out onto the floor, tomatoes exploding in the pan and chicken that was now black, Kitty was somewhat defeated, sitting cross legged on the floor with dude in her lap. It was a lot easier when his neighbors did it for her in New York and Kitty just took the credit. "I suck at this, dude." She murmurs to the pup, patting him softly.

SAMMY

Sammy has been out on an evening hike with a few of his LA friends and was pretty tired when he had gotten home. Home. It was crazy to him that he was now living in LA and with Kitty, the love of his life, he honestly was scared it would all go away and he was just dreaming. When he entered the apartment he could smell a faint smoky smell as if something was burning. Confused he called out for kitty. “Babe?” He asked as he closed the door behind him and then saw the dog bolting from the kitchen, giving him a clue as where Kitty could be. And he was right. He looked down at her with a small laugh, finding  her distress just a bit charming. He looked around at the failed attempt at dinner and he pouted “Oh honey...” he said with a small chuckle as he kneeled on the ground in front of her.

KITTY

Kitty's nose wrinkles at Sammy's voice, and though she wants to stand up and pull herself together now he's home, shes just too tired. She looks up at him when he enters the room and chews on her lower lip as she watches him assess her failure. "I tried? I really did. And then things started beeping, timers started going off at random times and I couldn't remember which was which and there were flames and..." she shrugs defeatedly. "Gordon Ramsay makes it look way easier." She comments with a faint smile and pushes her hair away from her eyes. "I can make you cereal or... something? Is that healthy?"

SAMMY

Sammy scoots closer to her, straddling her legs as he leans down and kisses her forehead. “Well, I really do appreciate you trying.” He spoke softly. “You’ve been very helpful and supportive these past couple weeks and I’m very thankful for it... but you know you don’t have to be like super girl, right?” He asked her as he brought a hand up under her chin with a soft caress of his thumb to her cheek. “I’ll love you even if you don’t cook for me.” He smiles at her.

KITTY

"That's good since I think you'll find Quinn has already firmly cemented her role as Super Girl." She answers, not able to stop the smile that pulled at her lips when he touches her cheek. At least he noticed she was trying... it meant she must have been doing something right. "Does that mean we can get take out tonight?" Kitty looks past Sammy and up at the now hecticly messy kitchen. "Like... healthyish take out? I really cant eat oats one more day without going crazy. We can get whatever you want."

SAMMY

Sammy chuckles and kisses her tenderly. “That’s right. That’s her job.” He nodded “Yeah, we can order take out, I’ll take a shower so I stop stinking from the hike and then we can watch the oh so famous Kardashian’s you’ve raved about.” He suggested to her, hoping it sounded okay. He stood from his place on the floor and helped her up as he looked around. “But first I should help you clean up.” He said with a chuckle

KITTY

She nods and takes his hand to get up from the floor, squeezing it gently as a silent thank you. "Nope, go take a shower, babe. I can clean up out here." Kitty reassures him with a half smile, and stands on her toes to softly kiss his cheek. She might not be able to cook, but cleaning she could do without messing up. Besides... he was all sweaty. "The Kardashian's will be waiting for you when you get out. Just don't lie down and fall asleep or anything while you getting changed." She moves to the sink, and turns on the tap. "Unless you feel like you need to sleep of course 'cause you did just go hiking, so that's cool too." She adds with a quieter voice.

SAMMY

Sammy was tired, he spent most of his days feeling a bit tired and looking forward to sleep but being with Kitty after a hectic week felt like the right thing to do. Not only that, he wanted to spend time with his girlfriend, he had hardly seen her all week, she had been so busy. “If I help it’ll go by twice as fast.” He told her as he brought the soiled pans to the sink. He looked down at her with a quirked eyebrow “You’re being weird. What’s going on?” He questioned her as he bumped her so he could get a sponge and start scrubbing the pan in his hand.

KITTY

"It's okay, I can-" She starts to protest but rolls her eyes when he picks up the pans. And he called her stubborn. She lifts an eyebrow at his next words, glancing at him for a brief second before quickly grabbing the sponge from his hands. "Nothing's going on." She shrugs slightly, forcing a much brighter smile to her lips. "Go and have a shower, babe." She instructs him. "I've totally got this. Really. I made the mess, not you."

SAMMY

Sammy doesn’t believe her for a single second. He let her take the sponge and furrowed his brows, standing there for a moment and chewing on his lip before realizing what had changed. “You’re being really nice... like Marley nice. What’s going on.” He asked again, his hands reaching to her waist. “Don’t make me tickle you...”

KITTY

"Maybe I'm just a nice person." She looks at him with a smile, confused about whether he was complaining or not. "But nothing is going on." She says again, noticing his hands coming closer to her and dropping the sponge automatically to take a step back from him. "Sammy... no." Kittys voice gets serious, knowing how ticklish it seemed that every damn part of her body was. She holds out her hands defensively, "Doooont."

SAMMY

Sammy gave her the most knowing look. “Kitty.” He said in all seriousness and then smiled at her. “You haven’t called me an idiot in like a month...” he replied to her and then cornered her against the counter, his hands ready for the attack as he wrapped around her and began to tickle her.

KITTY

"Maybe you haven't been an idiot." Kitty counters, her eyebrows raising at him as she continues to back further away from his hands. "Saaammy dont..." she says in vein, squealing when his arms wrap around her. Her giggling is loud and shes twisting against him to get away. Her body is only able to take it for a short time before she gives in, "fine fine fine." She says breathlessly in between laughing. "You're so annoying!"

SAMMY

Sammy laughs along with the girl, stopping when she gave in. He pulled back and bowed down to her. “Thank you, I pride myself in it.” He smirked and leaned over and kisses her gently. “Now what’s the issue dear?” He asked he wrapped his arms around her neck.

KITTY

"Oh thank God." She says thankfully as she catches her breath, her eyes rolling when he bows in front of her. He was defintely an idiot... but he was sort of her idiot. Kitty leans into his kiss and fidgets with his shirt idly as he pulls away. "You're sweaty." She remarks, her lips twisting. "You really should shower." Mostly shes just looking for a way to delay talking about her feelings at this stage."So im clear, are you complaining that I'm too nice?" Was that even a thing? Kitty sighs quietly and somewhat frustratedly, knowing now they lived together there really wasnt anywhere for her to run to.

SAMMY

“I’ll shower after we talk.” He said with the raise of an eyebrow. He purses his lips and bobbed his head as he thought of the right way to phrase his thoughts. “Not necessarily complaining, cause don’t get me wrong, you being nice... is nice, but it’s also kinda weirding me out. Considering how sassy and sarcastic you normally are and you haven’t made any snarky comments, not even about my pictures with Lana on the the red carpet... I’m actually shocked I didn’t get an earful about that,” he rambled and continued “not that I like want you to be upset with me but, I just... I feel like you’ve been tiptoeing around me cause I’ve been sick.” He finally spit out.

KITTY

"You were expecting me to get upset about those photos?" She snaps back, pushing him away a little. "Was that the point? You cuddle up to your co-star and see how long it takes for me to realize that's what you want?" She shakes her head, scoffing under her breath. "I didnt say anything because I was trying to trust you." Mostly true. She hadn't said anything because she didnt want to fight with him again. "And for the record, I'm not tiptoeing around you because you've been sick. I've been tip toeing around you because I'm delaying the inevitable. We stopped having sex for a while, you got sick and now it's... awkward. It's all just awkward. And I get it, I'm not a nice person, so just leave if it's so weird. Go and be with Lana or whoever you want to be with. You've basically beat the record for how long someone has stayed at this point so congrats, you'll get a prize in the mail. But I'm totally keeping Dude."

SAMMY

Sammy shook his head. “Woah, no, no, no. I didn’t think you’d get upset... I just thought you’d make a snarky comment on her outfit or something.... babe. I don’t want her.” He reassured her. Or at least he tried. He honestly didn’t mean anything when he mentioned the other girl, he half expected Kitty to laugh it off but boy was he wrong? “Have I really not proven myself by now?” He asked a little hurt if he was being honest. “The inevitable? Kitty, why are you so damn adamant that I’m going to break up with you? When everything I’m doing is leading to the exact opposite? I moved in with you, I moved states for you. Fuck, id marry you right now if you were down. Which, I know you’re not ready for, by the way so I won’t ask you.... but the awkwardness between us is only on your side. I don’t feel awkward when I with you. Us not having sex was definitely not because of you and you know that. And you know what? I like who you are. I like everything about you.” Sammy brought his hands to his hair, scratching his head in frustration. “Fuck, even you getting angry at me all the fucking time makes me love you....” he sighed and took a few breaths. “Look. I know I’m more friendly with people than the average person but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you or I’m looking to leave you or cheating on you for that matter. I love people, I love my friends and fuck if I don’t love you the most... I love you so damn much.  You need to learn to trust me, Kitty. I’m not the other guys you dated. I’m not ghosting you  or leaving you for my next coworker live interest... I know It doesn’t seem like it but I have a pretty good head on my shoulders and know what I’m doing and what I want. And it’s you. I don’t know how else to say it or spell it out. You drive me fucking crazy.” He said, biting his lip with a small smile tugging at the corner. His heart was honestly so full and even though they were fighting, she’s the only person worth fighting for.

KITTY

Kitty was mad. It was as though every feeling she’d had since finding out Sammy was sick was coming to the surface and the easiest one for her to grasp right now was anger. She’d watched him “date” his co-star before, and maybe that was why everything with Lana caused her to spiral so much more than normal... But he really hadn’t helped the situation either. She chews on her bottom lip as she listens to him speak, feeling less angry as each moment passed. Sammy didn’t often speak this much, and she knew him enough to be sure he wasn’t acting or reciting some cliche speech right now. Kitty also knew she should probably just move on, but she’d spent what felt like forever now not having the last word and being ‘relaxed and nice’ about everything, she didn’t have it in her to do it right now. “More friendly? You were basically making heart eyes at her on the red carpet, Sammy. And we both know i’m nothing like her -- for one, when I wear hair extensions they don’t look tacky and cheap.” She shrugs, sighing in frustration. “I love you, you idiot. More than I’ve ever loved anyone. I got over every loser that’s ever hurt me, or left me for someone nicer, or better, or sexier... but I don’t want to get over you, so if you’re not planning on breaking up with me I’m gonna need you to put it in writing that you’re not going anywhere. Because I’m so damn sick of not being enough for people.” She lifts her eyes to meet his. “I’m also gonna need you to stop freaking smiling!” She says, hitting his chest gently before resting her forehead on him. “God, you’re so annoying.”

SAMMY

Sammy chuckled, he couldn’t help it. “It’s Lana, and she has a boyfriend, either way, our relationship is totally platonic. Like I love her to death but like my little sister.” He explained to Kitty, hoping she would get it. He took her hands in his and quirked his brow slightly with a small smile. He didn’t know what overcame him but what he was about to say, it just felt right. “You want it in writing?” He asked as he kisses her head and pulled away from Kitty slightly to get down on one knee. “Marry me, Kitty.” He says gently, looking up at the girl, suddenly feeling very nervous and actually scared. His voice had the slightest shake to it as he continued to speak, getting more emotional as he went on. “I-I know it might be too soon but to me it just doesn’t feel soon enough... I know you’re the one for me. I think I’ve known since the day I met you...” he bit his lip, laughing at himself for getting so emotional. “Gosh, I’m so lame.” He said under a shaky breath. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you and fighting for you and alongside you...” he brought her hand to his lips and kisses it. “I’m so in love with you, Kitty Wilde.”

KITTY

Kitty's eyes widen as he pulls away and moves onto his knee. She almost laughs because there's no way he could possibly be proposing... unless he was proposing they shower and order Chinese food.  "Sammy..." She wants to stop him. Because this was not how she planned on this conversation going. She was a mess, they were standing in their kitchen surrounded by half done dishes and burnt inedible food, and they'd just spent the past ten minutes arguing. And then she hears his words -- the words --  and her heart stops beating. Was he serious? He looked serious. He sounded serious. "Sammy..." She repeats herself as she tries to remember how to breath, let alone talk. "I... This..." She shakes her head, and takes his hand to pull him up. "Stand up, stand up, stand up. That's not what I was getting out." She reassures him. "I love you... so much. But you don't have to propose to me because I'm scared you're going to leave me. That's my problem, Sammy. Not yours. Just...umm... write it on a post it note or something."

SAMMY

Sammy’s heart was beating at what felt like a thousand beats per minute. He knew it was a long shot but yet he still hoped she would say yes. Yes, maybe part of him did it to reassure her that he wasn’t going anywhere but most of it was because he couldn’t wait to officially spend the rest of his life with this girl. He wanted this not just for her but for him. He took another deep breath as he stood to meet her.  “I...I know this isn’t what you were getting at... and I’m not just saying this to make you feel better... I- I was serious when I said I want to spend the rest of my life with you. And yes I’m terrified.” He took another moment to breathe, grabbing one of her hands and placing it on his chest, over his heart, where she could feel it still beating unbearably fast. He let out a nervous laugh. “But I’m also so, so sure that you’re the one. You’re it. And I don’t want to spend another day with anyone, anywhere doubting that. Especially not you.” He nodded and then went to reach for the drawer beside her to grab the stack of post it’s and a random purple pen, scribbling something quick on it. “So...” He said as he brought of the little piece of sticky paper to her, the words ‘Marry me?’ Scribbled on it.

KITTY

Kitty was speechless. She could feel the beating of his chest and hear the way his breathing was different. But it was... sudden. Even if sometimes it felt like they were together for a lot longer, it was so sudden. She swallows and takes a deep breath as she tries to unscramble her thoughts through the sound of her own heart pounding way too loudly. God, why couldn't she think?? "You're still sweaty." She muses quietly with a small smile on her lips. He pulls away to get a post it note and in that moment Kitty's positive he's realized he's insane and is taking it all back. But if she wasn't sure how she felt before, she was even more unsure now. Taking it back might have been the smarter more rational decision, but if the way her stomach sank was any indication maybe it wasnt the one she wanted after all. Nothing with Sammy had been normal. From the moment they met Sammy had surprised her. He was crazy, and unpredictable... and possibly got too attached to his co-stars. But he fought for her. A lot. It didnt seem to matter how many times she pushed him away, or how many times she doubted him, he stuck around. He was the last person she thought of before she went to sleep at night and she loved that his face was the one she got to wake up to. Her whole life she had been trying to prove to someone that she was worth it -- her parents, her friends, her coaches, her boyfriends. But with Sammy? He didnt ask her to be anything other than herself. He didnt want or need her to prove anything. Being with him wasnt always easy... but she really did love and care for him more than she did herself. Which was... different and new.Kitty ran her fingers through her hair a little nervously, looking down at their puppy who clearly decided he'd had enough unsupervised destruction around the apartment and made his way back into the kitchen. She lifts her eyes to the post it note Sammy was now holding in front her, and she couldn't stop her face from lighting up. The blonde wasnt good at emotions, she tended to over talk and say the wrong thing, generally offending someone. But she knew how she felt in this moment. She chuckles and picks up the purple pen from the counter top, quickly taking the post it not from his fingers and scribbling below his words. There's a smile on her lips when she hands it back to him, her own words simply saying 'Yes.'

SAMMY

Sammy grew more and more nervous. Kitty being quiet about it all didn’t really help either. He half expected her to just push him away and leave the room, maybe just end things for good... god,  he was stupid. He didn’t want to scare the girl away and now he was on the verge of a meltdown with how quiet they boy were. He then sees the small smile on her lips and she comments on the newly dripping sweat running down his chest. The nerves and excitement making him sweat like a pig. Still she hadn’t answered but the smile seemed hopeful and Sammy returned the small smile, waiting for an answer as his heart continued to pound in his chest. Wow, waiting was exhausting. He felt like he’d ran a marathon.  He watches as she turns to pick up the pen, thankful she made the next move cause Sammy was close to a full blown anxiety attack, and she also take the note, writing something below it. It was fast and Sammy honestly has no idea what it says but he’s still hopeful.  She then shows it to him and now Sammy’s the one who’s speechless. He grabs the note from her hands and pulls it closer to his face, reading it over and over and over and over. It’s in her handwriting, this was real, she said yes. He lets out a relieved sigh and looks at her with a huge smile. “Wait, really?” He asks.

KITTY

Kitty watches as Sammy takes forever to read the note. That was what he wanted, right? It was what she wanted... surprisingly. And just as she questioned herself, the look on his face answered her. "Really." She nods, grinning like an idiot and still not sure how arguing about his co-star had led to him proposing."I love you. And the idea of not having a future with you terrifies me more than being with you forever. So... yes." She says biting down on her lower lip to try and stop herself from smiling so much. "God, you make me way too cheesy." She lifts herself up on the counter behind her and wraps her legs around Sammy to pull him closer to her . "So we're... engaged?"

SAMMY

Sammy swears his heart skipped a beat actually hearing her yes. He envelopes her in his arms, pulling her incredibly close to him, a yelp of excitement and happiness escapes his mouths and he rocks her back and forth and kisses whatever he can reach with his lips. He’s so happy, he actually didn’t know he could be this happy. He feels intoxicated and high and everything just felt right in the world.  “Holy shit, yes. We’re engaged. I- uh I need to get you a ring...” He stammers “Tomorrow, we can go pick one out. Whichever one you want. Holy fuck, I can’t wait to tell my parents.”

KITTY

For the second time tonight Kitty finds a small squeal escaping her mouth when Sammy's arms wrap around her and his lips are attacking her. She's happy... Beyond happy. Her face actually hurts from grinning which until right now she thought was something people said when they were trying to be cliché and cheese. "You don't have to rush." She assures him, not caring about anything other than just being with him. She picks up the post it for a second, "We have this... it's basically the same thing as a ring. But we should probably do the whole meet the parents thing some time soon." Kitty laughs slightly and leans in to kiss him again, pulling away with  smile when she needs to catch her breath. "You still have to watch the Kardashians with me tonight."

SAMMY

Sammy takes another deep breath and nods. “Okay.” He says softly, pressing his forehead against hers with a gently smile. “I’m so happy right now.” He told her with a chuckle as he pulled away to look at her. “Damn, I thought proposing would get me out of that...” he joked and laughed, shaking his head with a sigh. “It’s okay, I’d endure the Kardashian’s every day if it meant being with you.” He grinned. “Okay, I definitely need to shower now and then we can Ubereats some nice champagne and food and we’ll watch the Kardashian’s. Yeah?”

KITTY

"Nope." She chuckles, tilting her head with a smile. "You basically just committed to watching it with me forever and ever and ever."  She nods at his plan and places a gentle kiss to his cheek. "Oh phew, I was hoping you would shower sometime soon." Kitty teases him, her legs still tightly wrapped around him. There was a part of her that didn't want to let him go, being here with him right now felt perfect and she so very selfishly didn't want it to end. "And then we should really celebrate... preferably without clothing. Actually definitely without clothing." She smirks, and finally lets go of him so he's able to leave. "I love you, hot shot."

SAMMY

Sammy chuckled at her snarky comment and pressed his lips to her neck, growling lightly into her skin with desire and leaving a few kisses to her skin before pulling away, biting his lip with a grin. “I like the way you think.” He said as he kisses her and pulls away with a nip at her lips. “I love you, too.”

[localrobosexual]

so how about The Last Knight huh

HECKO I totally forgot to make that post about what I thought about Transformers 5 after I watched it whOOPS

so here they are now!! :0 it’s kinda long though. Sorry about that. Unlike my post about GOTG Vol. 2 that one time, for this one I just kinda wrote down some erratic notes about thoughts and reactions I had as I watched the movie, and then I kinda summed up my opinion about it overall down at the end?? so yeah. That’s how this one is gonna play out lol. Generalized running commentary style.

(fair warning: this WILL contain spoilers!! Like I can’t,,, , talk about it without giving stuff away lmao. If you haven’t seen the movie, and still want to and plan on doing so, I don’t recommend you read this!)

alright u made it past the spoiler warning so here we go!!

-  Quintessa gave me a lot of G1 Unicron vibes with the whole "I made you, you are mine to command" thing

- "Why do we tell these stories, besides the fact that dragons are wicked" girl same lmao

- I literally cannot. CANNOT. Take Barricade seriously. With those ridiculous "punish" and “enslave” branded brass knuckles. Buddy. My dude. Please chill. You're literally trying to be so edgy man just. Turn it down a notch lmao - Optimus literally didn't sound at all like himself at first?? It sounded like he had a different voice actor for those first few lines he spoke?? That was weird. It wasn't until the second time he appeared on screen where Quintessa was telling him about where the staff was hid was I like "oh wait yeah there's Peter Cullen" - the "Cybertron is coming" shot looked sUPER fake and green screened to me for whatever reason?? like idk I think it was the lighting they had on him but it was reALLY FUNNY PFFFFTT

- Bee swinging his legs on top of that roof was sUPER CUTE THANK U IM BLESSED

- Mohawk. Um. Who thought turning Junkrat into a Transformer was a good idea bc that’s literally all this dude is lmao

- What kind of name is Nitro Zeus. Im cryin. PRETTY SURE HE HAS THE SAME VOICE ACTOR AS THE ONE TIGER ALIEN FROM BEN 10??? I DON’T REMEMBER HIS NAME BUT HE WAS THE ONE THAT ALWAYS WENT "LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHIN". WHY DOES HE HAVE SHOCKWAVE'S FACE. IM SO DONE

- I like how they had the whole holoform bike thing going on?? like how Prowl's was in TFA and Arcee’s was in TFP that was neato - I WILL NEVER GET USED TO HEARING BUMBLEBEE SWEAR I S2G but the Siri voice thing was pretty funny ngl. I saw that in a trailer on instagram and didn't actually think it was actually a real scene that they kept I thought it was just made for that specific ad but nOPE IT WAS REAL LMAO - Megatron musing over Starscream's decapitated head oh my god liSTEN MAN PUT HIM DOWN DONT BE LIKE THIS COME ON - HI CAN WE TALK ABOUT COGSMAN I LOVE COGMAN A LOT I LOVE HIM HE WAS REALLY GREAT EASILY A BIG FAVE HE WAS SO ENJOYABLE TO WATCH I love how,,, ok heck I don't know this guy very well bc I didn't watch Age of Extinction but it's the green dude with the trench coat built into him,,, Crosshairs?? I think it's Crosshairs yeah but the fact that he called him a C-3PO rip off was fUNNY MAN that also got a good laugh outta me and he totally rekt his heckin finger lmao. He was rlly short?? that surprised me kinda like from the trailers it looked like he was pretty average human sized but nope he’s super short - BEE'S DOUBLE CHEST POUND FINGER GUN "ayyy my dude" THING WAS ADORABLE THANK U - THEY ACTUALLY WENT THROUGH WITH THE WHOLE EARTH BEING UNICRON THING HOLY HECK now that,,, that was really interesting. Didn't expect that. AND the whole Nemesis Prime deal?? OP getting brainwashed?? THAT'S why he's heckin evil nO WONDER MAN GEEZ I didn't think OP would willingly do all that to the earth just because. That makes me feel a lot better actually lmao - Soundwave!! Shockwave!! u guys are famous!! wow way to go im so proud of u!!!! - Hot Rod tho,,,, , oh boy he was a mess lmao. I only really know Hot Rod through MTMTE and the 80s Transformers movie so,, , not too too much to go off of, but he just was so incredibly DIFFERENT and off-putting from what I was used to that I honestly didn't like him so much?? I mean he was alright. Grew on me a bit more as the movie went on I think. He was ok. That time warp weapon thing he had was cool tho!! nice!! seemed kinda overpowered a bit but cool!! - COGMAN SPINNING AROUND IN A CIRCLE WHILE HE WALKED THE DOG WAS ADORABLE THANK U - you know that movie trope where he background music will become like a song on the radio and then a character comes and switches it off?? YEAH THEY DID SOMETHING LIKE THAT IN THIS MOVIE WITH THE EPIC WORLD-CHANGING ORGAN MUSIC AND I JUST. COGMAN GOING HAM ON THAT ORGAN HAD ME CRYYYYYYYIIINNG HE WAS SO INTO IT MAN OH MY GO D. I LOVE COGMAN THANK U THAT’S ONE OF MY FAVORITE TROPES AND IT WAS HILARIOUS GOD BLESS - HE CAN SING OPERA TOO IM CRYYYYIINNNG MAN JUST. PLEASE LET HIM HYPE UP THE MOMENT HE'S DOING HIS BEST!!!! - THE TABLE WAS WRITTEN IN OLD CYBERTRONIAN yknow if you could get Cyclonus down there he could probs read that for you no problem. Or don't actually. Please don't drag him into Bayverse oh I s2g nevermind nevermind - HEY MAN I LOVED THAT ROBOT HYDRA WOO BOY THAT WAS COOL and it's like?? a Combiner?? but not really. Burton just said the twelve knights combined into the dragon but I doubt they can all unfuse from that form lmao it was probs just a one time thing. So not a Combiner. Still cool tho. Robot dragons. SICK!!!!!! - HEY they did the whole Unicron's a planet-eating god thing this time around too wow. Neat. Listen man all I'm saying is I glad I watched TFP and bits of G1 and that 80s movie bc if not I woulda had no idea why Unicron was important lmao. That was pretty neat tho!! Interesting. Interesting. - OK BUT COGMAN LAUGHING AND SINGING "MOVE B!TCH GET OUT THE WAY" WHILE DRIVING 200 MPH DOWN THE ROAD WAS HILARIOUS WHAT A BLESSING THANK U - Surprisingly Bee seemed to be ok in that open water??? Hanging on to the side of a submarine?? I mean. Salt water man. Buddy watch out ur gonna rust plEASE BE CAREFUL

- speaking of which didn’t they say there was gonna be a submarine transformer in this movie?? like didn’t they say that in interviews before the movie came out?? I mean. We never saw that. It might’ve been that the submarine WAS a transformer but it never spoke, never transformed, nothing. Didn’t give any indication that it was uniquely Cybertronian aside from Vivian’s magic touch thing. Idk. That wasn’t explained so I mean. Hmm.

- Cogman can make sushi!! dang!! wow!!! bravo!!! - OP'S HECKIN INTERDIMENSIONAL BOOB POCKET OH MY GO D dang wish I had one of those lmao - THAT FINAL FIGHT WITH OP AND BEE THO AAAAAAAA OH MY GO S H HECKO MAN!!!! OPTIMUS RIPS OFF BEE'S DOOR WINGS MAN!!! GEEZ!!!! what I wanna know is like since when did Bumblebee have a hammer lmao. Like,, , is it supposed to the the Forge of Solus Prime?? When did he get that?? How and why?? I don't know and it was never explained but I mean. Why tho. - OH MY GOD BUT BEE'S VOICE!! IT ACTUALLY WORKED!!! DANG!! WOW BUDDY!!! AAAA!! IM GLAD HE'S OK!!! and that's all it takes to snap Optimus outta his brainwashed phase lmao ok then. Cool. Wasn’t what I expected him to sound like either but then again I really don’t know what I expected in the first place lmao - I feel a LOT better knowing Optimus didn't willingly wanna destroy the earth like. He was brainwashed. And when he snapped outta it he felt absolutely awful about what he did. I mean it felt like that whole plot point was rushed, a lot of this movie felt very rushed, but it makes me feel better at least lmao. Optimus I'm sorry man can I,,, , give u a hug or something man it rlly looks like u need a hug - "YOU CHOSE THE WRONG SIDE" OOOOOH BOY FLASHBACKS TO THAT CAPTAIN AMERICA CIVIL WAR BIT IN PRI.ME(3) LMAOOOO - CADE. BUDDY. YOU CANT JUST BLOCK A SWORD LIKE THAT. THAT WAS A KILLING BLOW DEALT BY A GIANT ALIEN ROBOT I DONT CARE HOW SPECIAL THAT MEDALLION THINGY IS U CANT JUST DO THAT LMAOOOO. And then as soon as he whips that sword out the rest of the knights are like "oh wait yeah let's stop killing this guy we're chill now let's all point out swords together" lmaooooo - Crosshairs' "Love that guy. Goosebumps every time" line after Optimus gives his mandatory speech lmAO DUDE SAME - "You were by far the coolest" alright Cogman you ruined the moment a lil bit but man I still love u hecko - OK THIS IS GONNA SOUND REALLY STUPID BUT LISTEN MAN I'M GLAD THERE WAS,,,, , a lot of hand holding going on towards the end. Like fr. Cogman to dying Burton and Vivian and Cade as they were gonna jump outta that plane onto the Cybertronian tendril whatevers. Just. Small bits of physical reassurance and comfort in times of real great distress. I appreciate that a LOT more than like, watching two characters make out right before the big climactic final showdown lmao. Thank u movie wow I really didn't expect that - SO THERE WAS A COMBINER TEAM!! A COMBINER MINOTAUR!!! DANG NOT EVEN GONNA LIE THAT THING WAS NEATO!!! - Ok forget what I said about Hot Rod at the beginning he redeemed himself at the end. I didn't like him and first but now,, , now we chill. Granted I still can't see him as being HOT ROD bc he's just so different from what I know him as Rodimus but I can still appreciate him as his own character. Cool cool. - OPTIMUS RIDING THE ROBOT HYDRA INTO BATTLE AND BLOWING EVERYTHING UP WAS GREAT. MAN THAT WAS GOOD. "DID YOU FORGET WHO I AM" WOOOO BOY CHILLS MAN!!!! - OH COME ON they still made out. Lmao. Dangit. It was inevitable but I mean come on man. Alright. They kept it short and quick thank you tho if u had to put in a make out scene at least u kept it to a minimum. Thank you. Can we get back to the robots now pls. - AAAAA BUMBLEBEE'S "STING LIKE A BEE" LINE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA - that ending was pretty sudden lmao. A lot of this movie was sudden and fast. They just jump cut STRAIGHT to those credits man not even an ending panorama or clean slow zoom out shot or anything lmao - AND OH BOY THEY TEASED UNICRON’S GONNA ACTUALLY COME BACK AND APPEAR IN ANOTHER MOVIE AAAAAAA OH NO OH BOY NOT AGAIN GOSH DARN IT LMAO 

All in all, surprisingly, I actually ended up kinda enjoying it!! Like it really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be!! Tbh for me it might even be second best in the series!! (First being the first movie from 2008 lmao) Honestly I was really REALLY surprised at how much I didn't hate it. Like. I still dislike it to a degree because it's still Bayverse, and I probably won't watch it again unless I'm with friends (like I do with the rest of the transformers movies) but it honestly wasn't too too bad! It really exceeded my expectations as far as plot, and I wasn't hardcore cringing for most of the movie so hey that's a plus!! The movie had a lot of genuinely funny moments, especially with Cogman, which got some pretty good laughs outta me like I was really having fun at those parts!! Optimus’ absence for most of the movie didn’t sit well with me for some reason. Like it just felt strange. But it kinda had to be for the story to move forward so I guess I can forgive that lol. The pacing was REALLY whack and way too fast though. Like they were REALLY trying to cram a whole lotta stuff into a relatively short amount of time. The movie's almost two and a half hours long but it really didn't feel like that because of how fast the pacing was. Some of the dialogue felt really forced because of this issue too. It didn’t feel genuine sometimes. But that has to be like, pretty much my only specific issue with it?? surprisingly?? wow. I'm honestly super shocked lmao dang man I didn’t think I’d like this movie at all but I was very much proved wrong!! I hated those old ladies tho and their obsession to get Vivian a boyfriend and the whole innuendo thing. Yeah. No. Don't do that. Stop. I'm too ace for this. 

anyways yeah those were my thoughts sorry that was so long lmao whoops  

[daehwins]

(cute ask thing) 2, 10, 12, 13, 14, 17, 20, 23, 28, 34, 46, 51, 52, 57, 60, 66, 75, 94, 99 and 100 (have fun)

w.yaaa hey sweetie ilu thank u for this and keeping me occupied when im supposed to be sleeping dfshdhj. @haeochan

2).  do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

no! unless im rlly warm then im up for it, but most of the times im freezing and dying, plus i dont like cold air in general bcs its hard for me to breathe in hwds.

10).  do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

i’m more or less an octopus?? i like to roll around and wake up frequently during the night and cant stay still. i start out on my side tho and most of the time wake up on my side or stomach.

12). what's your favorite planet?

i never rlly thought out this tbh?? i dont kno much about the solar system so wdsb.. mayb pluto bcs its not a planet anymore and im salty about it

13). what's something that made you smile today?

you. and the people around me, today was rough but the people i surround myself with definitely made it much easier to process.

14).  if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?

okay so first off it would be with u. and idk?? like i can imagine a small and warm place full of blankets and soft decorations and lighting and pastel colors bcs i love pastel colors?? and animals bcs we boh love animals!! and kpop shit everywhere bcs im a mess but u would probably fite me until i cleaned up after myself!! tbh.. i would be happy with anything as long as i could be with u...

17) . what color do you really want to dye your hair?

it used to be red, but now its soft/pastel pink!! or silver or blue or anything tbh bcs i rlly am tired of my hair.

20). what’s your favorite eye color?

i dont rlly have one?? i like eyes in a person (?? that sounds weird but like.. i feel like eyes tell a lot about a person and theyre rlly pretty) like.. i like all colors in eyes tbh..??

23). what's your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

sleep?? eat?? watch meme videos, talk aboout ocs, and talk to u my honey bunches of oats (haha my job is to eMBARASS U FUCCER)

28).  sunrise or sunset?

sunset bcs im lazy as hell and hate being up early as i wake up everyday before sunrise bc sof school.

34).  tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

i have soooooooooooo many! but a rlly special one is a ratty old dog named puppers! i got him from a mission store when i was probably 4 or 5..? with my grandmother. hes rlly special to me and i keep him very close to me when i sleep bcs hes a large comfort to me, hes been through everything with me adn i plan keeping him as long as i can!!!

46). tell us the worst pun you can think of.

i would but that would be a PUNishment.

51).  think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

you and spring day - bts. its one of my favorite songs and the lyrics just remind me of longing to meet someone one day that i miss dearly.

52).  what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

all of them??

57).  go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

lol i listened to the pentatonix vers. after today it makes me feel kinda weird lyrically wise.. i dont view it as the uppbeat song that everyone sings to.

60). do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

i love poetry!! i especially like to write free verse poetry. (i might add more later)

“Funeral Blues” - W.H. Auden

(last two stanzas)

“He was my North, my South, my East and West,My working week and my Sunday-rest,My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;I thought that love would last forever: I was wrongThe stars are not wanted now: put out every one;Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood,For nothing now can ever come to any good.”

66).  what would your ideal flower crown look like?

i have no idea tbh?? probably soft pink and blues?? idk about specific flowers

75). tell us about your pets!

i used to have a cat names rascal when i was very little! then various fish! now i have a black lab named addie! i love her very much and affectionately call her demon dog lol.

94). who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

some girl in my latin class was today but she didnt show up lol

99).  list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

UHM ILL HAVE TO COME BACK TO THIS ONE WHEN IM NOT HALF ASLEEO SRRY.

100).  if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

the future. i feel like the past is the past and its done, ive made my amends to what has happened and its done.i want to know where i am in the future and if i made it and am satisfied with where i am!

[flcwerstudies]

cute tag!

pretty long post coming up!! Thanks to @cafedetude for tagging me!! im tagging: @hermiionegrcnger​ @studying-frenzy​ @belledoe​ @tiny-notes​ @theteadesk​ !! You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to ofc and if u want to do it and i haven’t tagged you go ahead!! 

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? there must always be more milk than cereal, but that amount must not exceed a certain amount do you get me? when i scoop my cereal there has to be proportionate amounts of milk in each scoop, consistently, until i have finished my bowl. my mind is a strange and lonely place. 

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? yes! its so refreshing and i feel like all your lethargy just evaporates... i love taking walks in the winter around my neighborhood in the evenings.

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? spoons, lipsticks, i once used another book to bookmark a book, hair elastic, my contact lenses case, compact mirror....im a mess, i know 

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? tea: scalding hot with lots of sugar and some milk. coffee: lots of milk, so much sugar 

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? no? i just want my braces off!!

6: do you keep plants? yess

7: do you name your plants? yes! i am currently growing two wild roses and I’ve named them Calliope and Polymnia. 

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? journaling, writing, reenacting musicals and dramatic renditions of songs? 

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? yeah ofccc it keeps me sane 

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? back and side 

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? CAROL THE LESBIAN LIBRARIAN // mary walks by // too many to list here tbh 

12: what’s your favorite planet? mars! and also venus 

13: what’s something that made you smile today? my friends 

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? a hurricane flew thru the entire place, empty wine bottles on the ground, beanbag chairs, stacks of books and movies, maybe a cat and a dog lazing around on the couch 

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! there’s a gigantic cloud of alcohol wayyyyy out in outer space that could produce over 450 trillion pints of beer 

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? give me all the pasta. i love all pastas. 

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? im ok with my hair color now 

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. GETTING A CAPUCHIN MONKEY AS MY PATRONUS ON POTTERMORE

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? yes! i rant a lot and i sort of write down reflections? on my day and things. its really emo and angsty lmao im 16 pls 

20: what’s your favorite eye color? brown eyes. so gentle. so sharp. so kind but so cruel. so ambiguous! 

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. my tote bag from myanmar! the straps are falling off but i love it so much 

22: are you a morning person? depends on if i slept early enough 

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? sleep, watch a movie, watch youtube, read 

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? absolutely not. it always pisses me off when people are like ohhh you can tell me anything??? no i can’t???? 

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? my friend’s house lmao 

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? my peach converse! they’re so pastel and they seem weird but converse generally go well with a lot of things 

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? i don’t like gum tbh 

28: sunrise or sunset? both 

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? sticks his tongue out when he’s concentrating and its so cute i die everytime 

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? yes but i will never ever go into detail with anyone about this lmao 

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. i love socks, i like wearing weird socks except for toe socks, people who sleep with socks on are Immune to Heat and Not Afraid Of Dying?? no white socks get nasty real quick and they’re so bland, i love socks i have this grey pair with french bulldog faces allllll over it and i wear them all the time and even though people can’t see them i still get happy and tell people about my dog socks. 

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. HA LMAO we had just watched a scary movie so obviously we turned on my little pony and watched that for two hours 

33: what’s your fave pastry? cupcakes! anything tbh i have an enormous sweet tooth 

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? my dad used to go on a lot of business trips and he came back once with a huge stuffed bear from switzerland and its so fuzzy its still on my bed. it’s name is Fred and it wears overalls and it has brown fur! 

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? yes to all!!

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? paul anka lmao he’s not a band but ya know 

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? clean

38: tell us about your pet peeves! wHEN UR JAMMING OUT TO MUSIC AND THEN SPOTIFY JUST STOPS WORKING?? people asking me if im mad when im just being quiet and then making me mad by continually questionning me, people who will ask dumb questions (yes, there are always dumb questions. google is free and im not going to tell u the homework, it’s written on the board quite clearly u moron), racist/homophobic/ableist/ generally offensive and disrespectful people 

39: what color do you wear the most? grey and navy 

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? I have mismatching earrings that my grandmother got me for my birthday! 

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? Fifteen Dogs by Andre Alexis! 

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! the starbucks on center street it’s very Starbucks, exactly what you would expect, but I always sit in the corner spot near the windows 

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? My family! 

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? sitting in the sand in shell key, florida. my feet are in the water and i am watching my family swimming. I am very sunburnt but my mind is completely blank in a good way 

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? absolutely 

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. ofc they used a baby lion as their mascot. it’s simba-lic. 

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? there’s this food in korea that’s just stir fried rice with soybean sprouts and the sprouts..... aw god....they refuse to be bitten in half and it’s so gross i hate it sm 

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? darkness! and no it is different today!

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? there are scarce places to buy CD’s now but the last one I bought was Micheal Jackson’s Bad 

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? bottle caps and paperclips and also pens i pick off the ground 

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? my dad. any aretha franklin song 

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? the spongebob one and the gif of the white man who blinks a lot....u know the one 

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? i loved all of them and i want to be able to quote them in all of my speech but i dont think people have watched all of them 

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?  i was working on homework last night and when i was turning on my laptop to work on my project i met my reflection in the screen 

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? been incredibly bitchy like damn.....i surprise myself and i really hate it 

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? when people use weird shit as bookmarks, when they laugh with their eyes shut, laugh lines near their eyes, dimples, kindness, when they aren’t afraid of making eye contact with me bc i have weirdly intense eyes  

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? it did not fit the mood of my day but yes i did reenact the lyrics 

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? my friend diana is the wine mom but i am the vodka aunt. why?? she is infinitely more caring and kind and sophisticated and also wine gets u lowkey, calm drunk, while i, the vodka aunt, am caring, but i have a bit of a laissez faire attitude and go with the flow and ‘damn what the hell fuck it’ kinda vibe and vodka gets u sloppy shitfaced drunk with none of the sophistication that comes with wine. 

59: what’s your favorite myth? icarus

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? i dont LOVE poetry but i like haikus they’re like clever one liners ha 

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? I gave my friend a notebook that i’d hastily made the night before and I have received a box of pads which in retrospect is not even a stupid present bc pads are expensive 

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? i drink oj when i can 

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? i organize them every month bc i am ridiculous and i can’t function if my bookshelf is weirdly organized 

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? pale grey almost white.

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? my oldest group of friends (TNT lmaoooo) OR YOU KNOW callixtus from volunteering holyyy. you know those people who u meet and u immediately click with?? he’s on of them magical people and he was hella funny too i miss that guy to all hell 

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? small roses! peach blossoms and cherry blossoms too. one huge ass hibiscus or lotus flower as a statement piece 

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? cozy and sheltered. valid excuse for not going out 

68: what’s winter like where you live? terrible but i love it kinda 

69: what are your favorite board games? monopoly 

70: have you ever used a ouija board? NO WHAT 

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? barley, green or reallllyyyy black tea with loootss of sugar so that it makes your teeth ache 

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? yeah how’d you know 

73: what are some of your worst habits? expecting everyone to be on the same page 

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. dedicated and brash, loud and hilarious, soft, amazing, i love them a lot 

75: tell us about your pets! i dont have pets!! T-T  

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? studying BUT DONT CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS OK

77: pink or yellow lemonade? pink 

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? hateclub sorry 

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? done my makeup for me while gossiping with me

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? pale green and yeah i did. i chose it bc i love green! and the old color was boring and i didn’t like it  

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. no edges at all, soft bovine eyes , shaking leaves, crocodile tears 

82: are/were you good in school? yes! it’s a source of a lot of pride for me! 

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? amsterdam by nothing but thieves omg 

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? oohh nahh im not planning on getting tattoos im scared of needles 

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? through the woods? i used to read a lot of them but you know i grew out of them 

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? not especially no 

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? the drop, double indemnity, back to the future, idk there’s a lot 

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? the rennaissance! it was so extra and i loved it a lot 

89: are you close to your parents? yeah

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. TORONTO-soaring skyline from the highways at night near the lakeshore, the lights from the condos are like stars and its ridiculous but i also loooooveee dubrovnik in croatia and hanoi in vietnam and kaunas in lithuania and kyoto in japan.....in dubrovnik the wind blows in from the shore and at night when the lights are on in the walled city the stone glows amber. In Hanoi in the old quarter, motorbikes flash by and there’s yelling and the smell of pork skewers and there’s old buildings and new ones, huge stalks of bamboo leaning up against the walls. In Kaunas the wind is so cold and sharp and the buildings are so clean and there’s that old fortress and the tower! it’s so beautiful. and Kyoto is old and archaic but so modern it hurts and the streets are too uniform and the houses creep me out a bit bc they’re so quiet. 

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? i dont think so 

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? i will bury my pasta in cheese just you watch 

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? my hair is one style fits all bc its short 

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? my friend!

95: what are your plans for this weekend? study and work on projects and homework and stress and nap and have dinner with a guest 

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? no updates. we die like men. 

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? isfj-t, aries, ravenclaw 

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? sometime in september? it was nice! 

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. put your head on my shoulder by paul anka....there’s a lot and im really lazy sorry 

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years in the future, just to see where I end up 

[whambamthankyoubram]

ALL OF THEM IM A NOSEY BITCH

YOU ALWAYS DO THIS

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? MORE CEREAL THAN MILK OBVIOUSLY I’M NOT SATAN

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? No bc my cheeks are cold as hell and I need warmth

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? I fold the corners or put little mailings/postcards in them, whatever I have laying around!

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? Tea, nothing; coffee, milk only!

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? Yes :( There’s a gap in my teeth and I hate it. I wish my teeth were perfect.

6: do you keep plants? Nope.

7: do you name your plants? Can’t name the plants you don’t keep, my dude

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? Uhhhh...no?

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? YES all the time.

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? Side!

11: what's an inner joke you have with your friends? 

12: what's your favorite planet? Pluto bc it is still a planet okay

13: what's something that made you smile today? My boyfriend’s Snapchats

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? Messy af

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! “In space, the skin on your feet peels off.” EW SPACE WTF

16: what's your favorite pasta dish? MMMMMM any pasta tbh I’m Italian I will eat anything

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? I love my hair color the way it is now!

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. My ex never let me forget the time I was passed out on his couch, and I woke up intermittently before falling back asleep. He was watching Rush Hour. I asked him, (HALF ASLEEP MIND YOU), Oh, is this the movie with Chris Rock and Bruce Lee? (I’m awful).

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? I write my thoughts and crazy paranoia in there boyyyyyeeeee

20: what's your favorite eye color? BROWN

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that's been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. Uhhhhh it’s a longchamp bc I’m a white girl

22: are you a morning person? Not really

23: what's your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? SLEEP!

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? Not sure

25: what's the weirdest place you've ever broken into? I’ve never broken into anything omg

26: what are the shoes you've had for forever and wear with every single outfit? My Uggs, because I’m a white girl

27: what's your favorite bubblegum flavor? Mint

28: sunrise or sunset? Sunset

29: what's something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? My BFF giggles sometimes when she talks and idk it’s cute

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? Fuck yes, have you ever seen a spider? In your shower? Without your glasses on? 

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. I LOVE SOCKS! When I get socks for Christmas I get so excited. I can fall asleep with socks on, but at some point in the night, they’re coming off my feet lol.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. I ate pizza while I was drunk #wowimsocool

33: what's your fave pastry? Cinnamon buns, does that count?

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? Winnie the Motherfuckin Pooh. No :( He fell in the mud and I had to throw him out bc the washer couldn’t fix him

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? Fuck yeah I do!

36: which band's sound would fit your mood right now? Noooo clue tbh

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? Clean, but it’s always a mess

38: tell us about your pet peeves! I hate when the President sniffs into the microphone while he’s delivering some sort of address, blow ur nose next time or stop doing coke

39: what color do you wear the most? Black lol

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what's it's story? does it have any meaning to you? Nose ring, no special meaning I just really like it

41: what's the last book you remember really, really loving? An Abundance of Katherines bc I fucking love the shit out of John Green

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! Not really tbh

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? Probably my bf

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? The other night, at the beach! So pretty :)

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? Yes

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. I couldn’t think of any, next question

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? Aerosol cheese

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? Bugs, yes, ew

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? Don’t remember!! I bought the first Glee soundtrack when it came out LOL

50: what's an odd thing you collect? Socks?

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? I associate “All Night” by Chance the Rapper w my bf

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? Salt bae for sure

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? Beetlejuice was the only one, I watched a little of Pulp Fiction - they were both ok

54: who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? My friend :( she’s ok now but I saw her the other night and she was upset

55: what's the most dramatic thing you've ever done to prove a point? Not sure 

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? Laughter and the way people get excited over things

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? It made me feel like I’ve been having too much sugar tonight tbh

58: who's the wine mom and who's the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? I’M THE WINE MOM!!!! I am the wine QUEEN ok that’s all I ever drink. My bff is the vodka aunt, but she lives miles apart from me so we rarely drink together nowadays 

59: what's your favorite myth? Dude? I don’t have one

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock, T.S. Eliot. 

61: what's the stupidest gift you've ever given? the stupidest one you've ever received? I got a really ugly hat once, and I gave a really ugly hat once, at the same Christmas exchange party 

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? Nope

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? Hell no I’m a living mess

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? Black

65: is there anyone you haven't seen in a long time who you'd love to hang out with? Yes, my bff 

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? Mad lilies! They’re my fav flower

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? Depressed and tired tbh

68: what's winter like where you live? Cold but not too cold bc you know global warming

69: what are your favorite board games? Scrabble!!

70: have you ever used a ouija board? Yes lol

71: what's your favorite kind of tea? ANY KIND! Right now I’m really feeling ginger turmeric from Trader Joe’s, though, soooo good

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it? YES.

73: what are some of your worst habits? Uhhh not going to bed early enough lol

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. This person is a HUGE JARLEY FAN and super adorbs!!! Hates Mon-El and LOVES TO RANT ABOUT IT AND I LOVE THIS PERSON REGARDLESS 

75: tell us about your pets! So I have a dog, he’s almost 12 years old which is really depressing bc he’s probably going to pass on soon :( I’m obsessed with him and love him so much!!

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren't? Yeah, taking my bra off why am I still wearing it

77: pink or yellow lemonade? PINK, always

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? Hate club, get them the fuck away from me

79: what's one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? One of my old boyfriends learned how to knit for me which I thought was very sweet

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? Aqua! Because I like it?

81: describe one of your friend's eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. “Comets.”

82: are/were you good in school? Not really

83: what's some of your favorite album art? Ohhhh I know this, I love Californication’s album art so much

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? I have seven!!

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? No

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? Wat

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? The Lion King, BITCH

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? Not really

89: are you close to your parents? Yes

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. NEW YORRRRRK. Concrete jungle where dreams are destroyed you’ll never get anywhere go back to long island

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? Somewhere over the summer, not sure where yet tho

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? In the middle

93: what's the hairstyle you wear the most? Top knots bc I’m lazy

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? The Weeknd LOL

95: what are your plans for this weekend? Date night, then I’m not sure!

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? Ohhh I procrastinate so much

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? Not sure about the Myer-Briggs type, but I’m a scorpio + Ravenclaw

98: when's the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? Yes! I think in November. It was chilly, but a lot of fun

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

One Headlight - The Wallflowers (listening now)

Home - Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes

Love Drought - Beyonce

Under the Bridge - RHCP

Strip My Mind - RHCP

Literally anything by RHCP

Do You Realize?? - The Flaming Lips (I cry literally every time I listen to it)

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? Neither, because I am choosing to live in the MOMENT :) 

[audacesfortuna-iuvat-blog]

What a waste of a lovely night

Kind of inspired by same titled lovely song from movie la la land. this is a jily oneshot, set in the 6th year aka what is in my brain a strange period of love and hate for the pair. hope y’all enjoy my procrastination fueled writing extravaganza. ( didn’t double check this so please excuse my spelling errors or bad spacing)

Lily looked into the dark forest searching for a familiar bundle of messy black hair, He was late. Of course.Some things never change. If they did she wouldn’t be standing there in the forbidden forest, waiting for the bloody twat. How did she let herself be so easily provoked? I mean boy didn’t even do much. Sure he put his leg in front of Frank so he trips, but the two boys were friends and it was, as he so kindly pointed out, ‘’a bloody joke Evans’’. And for some reason that riled her up and she kinda sorta used flipendo on him. Why did she do that? She had no right to do that. Was it maybe, just maybe, that she was just so used to hating Potter that now that he finally seems to get a grip of himself she can’t change her mind. That’s not very like her. Or is she just not used to Potter not paying so much attention to her? Oh that can’t be for two reasons. Number 1:She hated those stunts that he pulled. Sure they may be charming to certain degree but James, uhm Potter always took them a step too far. Number 2: she would have to CARE about Potter to be affected by him which she obviously didn’t. And where the bloody hell was he?In that momentLily heard a familiar voice yell 

’’’Oi Evans hurry up we have a detention to do.’’

 She turned around ready to yell at him for being late but he was wearing that annoying grin on his face, and oh my god did he really decide to wear that tight sweater.

 Lily snapped back to reality:’’ It’s not like I’m the one who’s late’’ She said more timidly than one would expect.

 It kinda puzzled James but he wasn’t the type to overthink things. Air buzzed with silence as they went into the forest looking for Fang who has been mysteriously let loose. Even before detention Lily decided not to question James about it even though she was sure it was marauders work. To break the silence she exclaimed:’’ It is a lovely night, isn’t it?’’ 

This seemed to amuse James:’’ A bit formal aren’t we Evans?.’’

‘’Oh c’mon you gotta admit it’s pretty i mean look at the stars.’’’

James looked around. ‘’ Well it is quite pretty.’’

Then some urge in Lily made her say something she wouldn’t say to, well, probably anyone else:’’ Well too bad im here with you.’’ 

Luckily this made James laugh. Lily frowned. ‘’Old James’’ would probably get offended by this. She didn’t have time to overthink it before James still giggling asked her: ‘’You never change Evans, don’t you?’’. 

Lily was confused by this statement:’’ What do you mean?’’ 

‘’ Should we stop here, we’ve been walking quite a while, and that branch looks like a nice place to sit.’’ he interrupted her.

‘’Uh, sure, but what do you mean Potter?’’

‘’What I mean Evans’’ he was saying with a slight smirk ‘’ is that you and I will obviously never get along because no matter how much i change, you still seem to absolutely despise me.’’

‘’Potter you didn’t change.’’

‘’Don’t act stupid Evans, it’s really not your style’’ at that Lilly rolled her eyes.’’ you couldn’t possibly not notice that I stopped hexing people as much, after all it is your job to keep track of that stuff, you know, as prefect’’ he said pointing to her prefect badge. 

She pushed his hand out of the way. True she did notice that something was different about him, but she didn’t think much about it. And before she could know any better she said:’’ So what. You stop hexing people for like a month, to make people believe you’re a goody-two-shoes and we’re all supposed to fall for your schtick?’’ 

He grinned then said:‘’Oh Evans, you poor naive Evans do you really think i would change to impress anyone, after all i already am quite impressive’’ he stopped to pose dramatically.

She snorted.

‘’But all jokes aside’’ his voice took a more serious tone’’ no i’m not doing it for anyone. This may sound hard to believe but i have decided to become a more decent human being. Sure I’ll always keep doing pranks, but messing with people in a way that i now realize isn’t funny to them is something i’m dropping from now on.There’s already so many problems outside of Hogwarts, you do read Daily Prophet don’t you?’’ she nodded ‘’ Good then i don’t need to explain. So i think that not making problems at Hogwarts is the least i can do for now. But don’t worry I’ll still wreck some havoc just not the harmful one’’

Lily was left speechless. Absolutely, completely, truly speechless. How did this boy, this idiot, change so much in so little. Sure the personality was the same, but how did his worldview and sense oh right and wrong change so much? How did he become so mature, after like what, 4 months? 

‘’Lily did you even listen to me’’

She realized she was gaping at him with a mouth slightly open. AND they started walking again

‘’i-i-i’m sorry it’s just its a bit of shock really.’’ she stuttered out and went back to staring at him.

He grinned at her in that James Potter fashion and continued:’’ Ok good, now that we have that out of the way let’s go back to a bit more normal topics.’’

Lily was finally broken from her trans:’’ Normal topics?’’

‘’Yes you know the stuff that, for example Hannah and Zabini would talk about’’

‘’Oh i don’t think there’s much talking between those two.’’

He laughed.’’ You’re right, then i don’t know, what do you talk about with Mary.’’

Lily thought for a second.’’ Well we talk about current events at school, i guess?’’

‘’And what would those current events be?’’

She knew she said she wouldn’t  ask but she couldn’t help herself:’’ Probably who set Fang loose? You know the dog we’re looking for.’’

James stopped dead in his tracks. ‘’Well maybe I haven’t changed that much.’’

‘’JAMES!’’

‘’Oi you called me James!’’

‘’ ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS’’

‘’No i’m not fucking anyone at the moment’’ he said with a cheeky grin.

Lily had to stop for a second before she exploded. Besides the boy was right it was unusual for her to call him James. Actually she couldn’t remember the last time she called him James. She needed to get back on track though.

‘’ Do you know where Fang is then?’’

‘’Well yeah, but we kinda told Remus to return him’’ 

‘’Why would you do that? And by we, who do you mean?’’

‘’Me and Sirius obviously.And we did it because we thought we would get detention together and then the two of us we could roam the Forbidden Forest, and nobody could punish us for it. Capiche?’’

‘’That is kind of smart’’

‘’ Thanks Lily.’’

‘’Oh look you called me Lily.’’

‘’Seemed appropriate after you called me James.’’

Now the old James would add something like:’’ i aM STARTING TO GROW ON YOU EVANS’’ to that statement, but this new James stopped. Lily wasn’t sure what she was going to do about this new James.

‘’So where did Sirius end up then?’’

‘’ In owlery with Peter.’’

‘’ Why does Peter always have detention in the owlery?’’

‘’Oh it’s a funny story. Basically owls HATE Peter and Mcgonagall caught up on that so she always gives him detention in owlery and other teachers figured out too so now poor Peter is stuck in owlery with animals that despise the living hell out of him.’’

‘’Why do owls hate him?’’  Lily asked, while giggling slightly

‘’ Let’s just say he’s more of rat person.’’

Lily thought that that’s  quite an odd statement.

‘Ok then and which do you prefer more then?’’

‘Well because of Peter i guess I have to say rats.’’

Lily stopped for a second.

‘’ Is THAT why he eats so much cheese? Because he likes rats?’’

Jams started laughing like crazy. Lily was just weirded out by Peter and his rat obsession.

When James calmed down a bit he said:’’ Yes that is why he likes cheese so much.’’

‘’I gotta admit that’s really odd.’’

‘’ You get used to it. So Lily do you have any weird habits or are you truly Miss perfect’’’

Lily snorted sort of because of the question sort of because she realized this first name thing is becoming a thing now:’’ Of course not. For example i chew my hair when i’m nervous.’’

‘’That’s gross.’’ 

Old James would never say that. But Lily didn’t mind nor did she miss ‘’ Old James’.

‘’ Hey it’s not like i do it in public! Besides you also must have some bad habits. C’mon reveal your dirty underwear!’’ (a/n not really sure if this is a saying in english but it is in my country and it basically means reveal your dirty secret)

‘’Well i think it’s pretty clean but here goes nothing.’’ he said pretending to unzip his pants.

‘’YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT!’’ she yelled why laughing

He pretended to zip his pants back up, but he made quite a show out of it because the ‘’zipper’’ ‘’broke’’. Lily decided he would be a pretty good mime.

‘’Are you done avoiding your question?’’ Lily said with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

‘’Ugh fine.’’ He finally ‘’ zipped’’ his pants. ‘’ so the obvious one is ruffling my hair’’

That was true

‘’And im pretty sure you’re familiar with my fidgeting since you sit behind me in charms.’’

Also true.

‘’ But, ok this is not really a bad habit since i can’t control it but it is embarrassing, and it CAN be used against me , and if Sirius finds out it WILL be used against me so-’’

‘’Just get to the point James!’’ she interrupted him curiosity at its peak.

‘’ Patience Lily, patience. Do you promise you won’t tell anyone?’’

‘’ Yes, yes is do!’’

‘’Ok then.’’He breathed.’’Isleeptalk.’’ he murmured fastly

‘’Sorry i didn’t catch that.’’

He sighed.

‘’ I sleep talk.’’

Lily stopped for a second. ‘’ So? What’s so bad about that?’’

‘’Because i don’t say.... normal.... stuff.’’

Lily was yet again confused:’’ Then what kind of stuff do you say then.’’

he sighed... again: ‘’You have to promise you won’t laugh’’

‘’I wont laugh’’

‘Lily-’’

‘’I WON’T’’

‘’Ok...’’ ha paused. Lily almost exploded from excitement.’’ Apparently one time i was singing, and yes singing not talking, about how i’m  a pretty girl who wants to be ballerina. There, you happy.’’

Lily was in shock. And then the laughing started.

‘’ You said you wouldn’t laugh!’’

‘’i’m-’’ ‘’sorry-’’ It’s just’’- she couldn’t breathe. This is going to be the death of her. She is going o die because James Potter wants to be a ballerina. The laughing came back as strong as ever.

‘’Please-’’’’tell-’’’’’more-’’

James couldn’t help it. He would hate to admit it but he loved to see her laugh like that even though it was at his expense.

‘’ Fine. There was this time I planned out loud an escape to France  that i would bring Sirius to and then we would find this wizard who would turn us into horses and we could gallop through fields of France.’’

 You can probably guess Lilys reaction. 

This went on for approximately half an hour. He would tell the ridiculous thing he talked about in his sleep ( or the thing he sang) and she would laugh like crazy.

After some time they had to stop because her muscles were starting to get sore.

when she finally calmed down she asked:’’ Who told you all that?’’

‘’ Remus. Peter and Frank always fall asleep before me and i’m apparently not that loud to wake them up. Same goes for Sirius even though he sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night but I’ve been lucky that he never woke up at the right time ’’

‘’Oh you’re so lucky Sirius doesn’t know.’’

‘’ You’re right I am lucky. And NO ONE knows. Remus and my parents are only exceptions and now i guess you. Please keep it a secret.’’

‘’ I will.’’ and she truly meant it. It would be really embarrassing if people found that out.

‘’ Lets change the subject’’ he yelled and clapped his hands.’’Ooh i know! Whats your favourite colour?’’

‘’ Are you serious?’’

‘’No, I’m James geez Evans, i mean Lily, i would think you’d learn by now.’’

‘’Will the Sirius puns ever stop?’’ 

‘’No they’re too good.’’ He said with a cheeky grin

‘’Would have to disagree on that.’’

‘’Well Lily, don’t avoid the question?’’

‘’What?’’

‘’Your favourite colour?

‘’ Oh that.. hm you go first i need to think, never really considered it.’’

‘’ Never considered your favourite colour? You’re truly an odd one Lily.’’

She frowned at that.

‘’Oh c’mon don’t frown, smile suits you better.’’

she frowned even more.

‘’okay Jesus.’’ he muttered under the breath.’’ Well the obvious pick would be red i guess, you know Gryffindor and stuff, but my favourite is yellow is yellow. It’s so happy and vibrant and i don’t know how to explain it, but do you get it?’’

Lily smiled at the boy.’’ You do take your colours seriously?’’

James smiled back’’ Well i do like to draw so there’s that’’

‘’ Oh really? I did notice you doodle quite a bit in class because you’re obviously not taking notes. Really James what was that Divination homework that almost made Trelawney cry?’’

He snorted‘’Oh you wouldn’t want to know. And yes i do doodle quite i lot and i can show you sometime what i draw i think you’d like it. And now Evans what’s your-’’

‘’Just one more thing! I think that yellow shows that you’re truly  a Hufflepuff at heart.’’

‘’Oh shut up! And don’t avoid the question!’’

‘’Fine. I guess purple. No explanation. It’s just pretty.’’

‘’Purples fine. Good pick.’’

‘’I think.’’

‘’ YER ALL CAN GO BACK TO YER DORMS WE FOUND FANG’’yelled Hagrid and interrupted the pair.

Lily and James went  back to the castle in silence. But it was comfortable silence. Then on the castle doors James proclaimed:’’ I’ll go pick up Sirius and Peter. Goodnight Lily’’ he made few steps before Lily called him out:’’ James!’’

‘’Yes Lily?’’ he turned around, his eyes now having a bit of a sleepy look.

‘’It’’ she stopped for a second, thinking will she actually say it’’ It was after all quite nice spending this night with you.’’ she ended with an unsure smile.

He stopped for a second looking baffled. She thought she had screwed up. Then he smiled:’’ Same here Lily, but now i really need to go’’ he rushed up the stairs.

She stood there for  a moment.. Old James would now have a huge fit about how Lily loves him. But new James didn’t. Lily decided she liked this new James . Her face lit up as she smiled and went back to the dorm. But what she couldn’t see was that his did too.