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#im so sorry for everyone including family/friends of bin
mingyusbinch · 11 months
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REST IN PEACE, DEAR MOONBIN (1998-2023)
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gloomyhearts · 3 years
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That's life || Steve Harrington
Chapter ten
October 30, 1984
Y/N POV
Almost a year after Will went missing. The boy did recovery very well at least it looks like he did but this afternoon in the arcade changed my mind.
I started to work at the arcade three months after Will was back. My brother was happy but for him because I could give him coins to play.
So today after school Dustin and his friends wanted to meet at the arcade and Dustin wouldn't be him if he would have to search for some coins. He searched through the whole house including the shed.
"Dusti you're alright?"
"I totally am."
"Do I have to take you to the arcade?" He just nodded as he lifted the pillow from the sofa.
"Dustin Henderson what are you doing? you're scaring Mews" he walked over to the cat and excused himself.
"Dustin I can borrow you some" he turned to face me
"and you're saying this now after half an hour of my search?"
"You could have asked me but you didn't and it looked funny" I laughed and my mom too.
"Mo-om" he threw his arms in the air sighing.
"Dustin don't screw your pants." My mom's a real savage.
"Ready?" He nodded and walked out the door.
We drove to the arcade and I parked the car, "are you staying the whole time?" He nodded and I rolled my eyes, "you're stupid. Call me when something is wrong" he nodded and walked away from me.
Two hours into shift Nancy stormed into the arcade earning glances of the nerdy gamers.
"Nanc what's wrong?"
"There is this Halloween party and I want you to come" she was enthusiastic
"there's no way I'm going"
"please Billy's there too" Billy is the new boy at our school he almost hit me over with his car as I was walking to the entry and then he tried to flirt with me. Nancy thinks I have a little crush on him.
"Y/N please this will be fun. Steve could take you there" yeah Nancy and him are still together and it's still driving me crazy I don't want to be near the couple if I could
"but I promised Jonathan were going with our brothers on trick or treat."
"Jonathan is coming too"
"that's not typical for him. You sure?" Nancy only nodded.
"Y/N" I heard Dustin shout through the arcade. He came running towards me.
"Will is.. He is standing outside and we think he has an episode again."
"fuck" I came forth the counter and walked over to Will.
"call miss Byers" Dustin nodded and walked into the back.
"Will. Hey it's me Y/N I'm here. Everything is alright. You're not going to the other world again" I touched him slightly and he came back from wherever he was.
"Will you're good? Joyce is coming" he didn't say anything and just hugged me. I caresseshis back and whispe, "I'm here Will, it's okay." I noticed that he was shaking and lightly crying.
Five minutes later Joyce arrived at the arcade and thanked me for looking after Will.
"I'm so thankful you were here. Will really likes you. Thank you so much" she hugged me and went to their car.
"Y/N" Dustin walked over to me again.
"Do you know who's mad max?"
"I heard the new kid Billy called a red haired girl Maxime. Maybe her I don't know. I'm sorry Dusti"
"it's alright."
"Oh and Dustin. Only an hour to go buddy" he nodded and joined his friends again.
"I feel so bad for Will. He was such a lovely boy and now he's just scared" I forgot that Nancy was still here.
"Yeah I'm so sorry for the boy and his family" we stood there in silence.
"So you're coming?"
"I have no choice or?" She shook her head.
"Great. Call me when Steve arrives at yours" she nodded and left.
Ok so eventually I like Halloween but not with dozens of teenagers around me and alcohol. I always enjoyed to do trick or treat with my brother and his friends.
"The time is up Dusti time to go. The arcade is closing."
"Noooo I didn't revenge on mad max." He cried out as I drag him out to the car.
"That's so unfair."
"What? You can stay even a few minutes more than the others you should be grateful"
"I'm not because of mad max"
"you're such a stupid boy. Please shut up"
During the drive home we didn't talked that much and when we arrived Dustin ran into the house.
As i passed the bins I heard some hustle but I ignored it.
"Hey darling. How was work?"
"Great as everyday." She smiled and I sat down at the table to start dinner.
"Are you ready for Halloween Dustin?" He stopped eating and smiled as wide as he could.
"And you Y/N?"
"That's it. Nanc asked me to come to the Halloween party" Dustin and my mom widened their eyes.
"You're not coming with us?"
"No but Jon is, you're going to be alright" my mom calmed down after she heard they wouldn't be alone.
"I'm finished can I go upstairs?"
"Yeah honey. Good night" I gave her a quick cheek kiss and left.
When I arrived in my room Steve sat on my bed.
"Who allowed you to come in?"
"You?" He pointed to my window which wasn't closed at all.
"Idiot"
"Love you too dumbass" I sat down next to him and he lays his arm around me.
"How was work?"
"It was boring. I can't believe I took that offer"
"it's okay Y/N only a year and then you're almost off to college" I lay down on my bed and he was now laying next to me
"is this cheating?" I turn in his arms to face him.
"You and me laying here and talking?" I nodded, "when you think that this is cheating then you've got your answer."
"No I don't think so but everyone is interpreting different"
"so what would Nancy interpret as cheating? I mean she laid in the same bed with Jon a whole night and they talked. We are just laying here and talking I'm leaving soon if you want me to go"
"no stay, please. So you're going to the party as well?"
"You're coming?" I nodded, "that's great finally you're interacting with people in your age."
"Shut up" I slapped his chest, "you have to take me with you"
"in my car?" He laughed.
"Yeah Nancy said so"
"so she's now deciding over both our lives?"
"Looks like. Steve I'm so tired"
"do you want me to leave?" I couldn't even answer because I felt asleep on his chest.
Steve's pov
I was laying in her bed waiting for her to come upstairs after having dinner.
Today she worked the longer shift and hasn't really got a break. I'm feeling sorry for her because she's working her ass off and they are paying her like shit. Hopefully she's happy to see me.
"Hey there" I said as she entered the room still in her working clothes.
"Who allowed you to come in?"
"You?" I just pointed towards the window which she didn't closed at all.
"Idiot" she teased me.
"Love you too dumbass" she sat down next to me and I laid my arm around me.
"How was work?"
"It was boring. I can't believe I took that offer"
It was kinda hart to her y/ec full of tiredness, without the sparkle, "it's okay Y/N only a year and then you're almost off to college" She lays down on her bed and I was doing it like her.
"is this cheating?" She looked me in the eyes.
"You and me laying here and talking?" She nodded.
Why would she think over that
"When you think that this is cheating then you've got your answer."
"No I don't think so but everyone is interpreting different"
"so what would Nancy interpret as cheating? I mean she laid in the same bed with Jon a whole night and they talked. We are just laying here and talking I'm leaving soon if you want me to go"
"no stay, please. So you're going to the party as well?"
"You're coming?" She nodded
"that's great finally you're interacting with people in your age," I chuckled and her eyes lit up.
"Shut up" she hit my chest, "you have to take me with you"
"in my car?" I just laughed.
"Yeah Nancy said so"
"so she's now deciding over both our lives?"
"Looks like. Steve im tired"
"do you want me to leave?" She hadn't answered because she felt asleep on my chest.
I totally missed her. I have her back, finally. I won't loose her again I couldn't handle it. I think I love her.
October 31, 1984
Y/N POV
The next morning Steve wasn't there. Steve and I become closer again but I still feel the same towards him and I don't know if he knows. I'm scared that Nancy would assume that Steve would cheat on her with me because he isn't! We are friends!
Today was the day. The party. I hate to interact with others I don't know. I hate being around too much people.
"Dusti could you help me please" Maybe he has an idea what to wear.
"What's wrong?"
"Can you help me? I don't know what to wear," he rolled his eyes and opened my closet.
"Go as Sandy Olsson."
"From Grease? I'm too ugly Dustin"
"okay you're the totally opposite of ugly Y/N!"
"you're only saying this because I'm your sister."
"AAah" He sighed. "maybe a bit but only a quarter."
"Oh thanks Dusti but I don't have any clothes she has worn"
"of course," he went inside to have a better view. He threw a black leather pant into my face followed by a black crop top and a pink jacket.
"And you're taking moms black high heels."
"I'm not wearing heels!"
"of course you will. Please that would suit the outfit so good."
"fine," I sighed and walked to mom asking for her heels which she gave me. "Okay and now?"
"A bit make up," he opened the drawer and picked some utensils. "Great you can do this by yourself," i dragged him towards the door, "thank you Dustin. Love you."
"too," he left the room and I applied the make up.
Nancy called around eight o'clock telling me they would be here around twenty minutes later. I waited outside for the couple and hopped in as soon as they arrived.
Dustin left two hours before so Jonathan could join them for an hour and a half.
"And what do you show?" Nancy turned in her seat to look at me.
"Wait let me guess. A pink jacket. And the black clothes. Mm." She thought.
"She's Sandy Olsson Nancy."
"Steve I wanted to guess," she clapped her hand on his chest, in the raw view I saw him rolling his eyes
"I'm sorry," I smiled lightly.
We arrived to many already wasted teenagers, almost everybody held a red cup in his hand, swaying to the music.
"I'm getting drinks for ya Y/N," I nodded and she walked away.
"You're looking stunning Y/N," I felt heat in my cheeks.
"Mm thanks. You're not that bad yourself," Nancy came back with red cups.
"I'm not drinking Nanc I'm sorry" I put the cup on the counter next to me.
"Oh please only today. It's party time" she threw her hands in the air.
"Mm no thanks Nancy." We stepped on to the dance floor in the living room where everyone were when Billy and his friends including Tommy and Carol arrived.
"They are assholes," Steve muttered under his breath and focused on Nancy again who was drinking her fourth cup.
"Nancy I think that's enough" Steve tried to take the cup away but it spilled over her white blouse.
"Nanc.. I didn't want to. Nancy I'm sorry" she ran upstairs to the bathroom and he followed her leaving me alone in the fully living room.
"Y/N," I felt a tap on my shoulder and as I turned to face the person behind the voice I realized it was Jonathan.
"Jon you're not dressed," he turned a little bit around to show a bunnytail.
"Nice. I like it."
"Where are Steve and Nancy?"
"In the bathroom"
"couldn't they wait until home?"
"No ihhhr.. they're not doing it. Steve spilled Nancy's drink over her shirt"
"that's bad. How is the party"
"as an anti party person I hate it," we laughed when Nancy ran past us.
Jonathan began to walk after her and I wanted to do the same but someone grabbed my arm.
"Y/N can we talk?" I nodded and he lead me to the backdoor.
"What happened?"
"Nancy said that our relationship would be bullshit. That she doesn't love me. That it all is bullshit." A tear rolled over his cheek and I wiped it away.
"I'm so sorry Steve." I looked at him and saw his red eyes. As I saw him like that my heart began to hurt and a tear left my eye too. A strand of hair fall in his face and I pulled it behind his ear. A few moments later I hugged him and we stood like this a few minutes.
"You know Steve when someone is drunk they are saying the truth. Always. I'm not saying this because of you know. I'm saying it as your best friend I just want the best for you," I hugged him again and we drove to my house.
"You want to come in?" He nodded and locked his car.
"Thank you Henderson."
"You're welcome Harrington."
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ca1e70-deactivated · 4 years
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a list of my entirely way too niche headcanons ive actually implemented for everyones imagination:
name options ive used and refuse to retire: david elizabeth strider (sometimes i dont feel like being a douche to others and saying thats not his name), harley davidson strider, and david james strider for the sake of simplicity
im not gonna tell yall the like. oc exes ive given him bc thatll take eighteen years. 
i dont rlly have an explanation on the ghost thing besides the fact he just can? ive occasionally pulled from family ghost stories and experiences bc i somehow got landed with family members who lived in a haunted house for a decade and enjoy scaring me with all the stories (including the time my cousin literally died on the kitchen floor from a bronchial spasm and one of the friends that was over asked my aunt later what was up with the old man she saw in the corner of the room that night - my cousin is fine btw shes just a huge bitch and a third grade teacher and i dont like her)
whether or not hes done drugs is based on absolutely nothing besides how im feeling in that moment. either hes the designated driver and sober friend forever or he got fired from his job after doing a line at work during graveyard with some random customers theres no inbetween (this absolutely happened @ waho. if dave works at waho hes a mess of a person and thats on the diner itself.)
ok look i hc dave w/schizophrenia besides when i was 14 i had a hyperfixation with learning about it and then at 16 was prescribed a medication and had side effects so wack my therapist genuinely thought 14 yr old me was onto something and its a weird way to cope with the idea that lady put in my head that i might “develop it in my twenties” which i turn 20 this year and i havent been able to stop obsessing and panicking over the prospect so PLEASE dont come in my inbox calling me ableist im not out here all harley quinn in suicide squad with the voices ok hes medicated, he goes to therapy, the hard fast delusion that lil cal was nearly sentient and informed bro of every single thing dave did no matter how asinine it was is no longer a debilitatingly affecting him ANYWAYS
i actually use the chicken/egg farming family pretty often just because its hilarious to me to give dave like. an actual mom and dad. hes literally an uncle to like three different kids he just never visits because they make fun of his skinny jeans and he hates one of his (incredibly bare-bones ocs all of them) brothers who threatened to bash his head in with a little league bat after dave broke his star wars lego set apart on accident (but not rlly) so their parents were like “why dont you stay with your brother in the big city for a lil while champ” and then they just never picked him back up? and thats on favoritism 
the other one is that his name is actually david reed and hes the middle child of a family of three who literally live the standard golden retriever white middle class life only they went to disney land or something equally as dumb one year when dave was like 6 and he wandered off so bro literally just went “huh free game” because frankly he was an idiot who thought maybe i should take this kid home because its real dangerous in parking lots and then it was too late to NOT have it seem like a kidnapping and thats why daves never had a summer job, seen his birth certificate, or gone to school. but vaguely remembers what kindergarten was like and having a pet dog and calling someone mom as a kid. 
im not making a bullet point about his sex life headcanons just use your imagination and acknowledge the fact bro essentially worked within the sex industry and i enjoy putting dave through trauma as a catharsis 
i stopped doing this one usually but if he did go to school hes been in percussion since fifth grade and played the drums in his high schools jazz band as well as various edgy teenager garage bands he likes to pretend dont have a youtube presence and that hes absolutely never been shirtless in front of plenty of his classmates because he wore a hoodie to a show like an idiot. idk occasionally ill put him in an actual band he doesnt hate but keeps separate from his lil turntechGodhead internet persona (which i will ALSO touch upon in a sec) until they wind up getting looped into a tour with some bigger named band that has a show in *insert beta kid here*’s city and hes gotta come clean solely so he can visit his online friend. sorry derseasterous thats the one time weve ever run into each other and i made him have a crush on one of his bandmates i was in my anti-daverose phase where i made dave a hoe and also didnt want to admit i still loved the ship all these years later 
i hate it so much but you know the whole vr loli trap voice shit that was popular a while ago? hes fucking baller at it for some reason. he did it as a joke while talking to bro and they both about shat their pants. if im feeling real ambitious, hes got a separate soundcloud solely dedicated to doing dumbass rap covers or making his own but in the voice under the pseudonym elizabeth “beth” davids that he will never admit is his. well, he will, but hes gonna be really fucking embarrassed about it. irony or not.
talking abt seperate soundclouds and stuff ive always had it where turntechGodhead was his like. essentially internet fucking persona facade shit he used because we all had that phase where we wanted memorable urls and stuff but also didnt want to totally ignore the nagging fear of people finding you in real life, until it turned into real life ppl finding you on the internet. so he also has basically an adjacent set of social media under the same name but its just a boring username i havent decided on so everyone he knows irl doesnt mix up with what hes made for himself as TG and the people he knows as TG dont know what highschool he goes to. (this occasionally comes with the territory of ppl on parp being pissed that daves “lying” or “hiding things” from his friends as if he was doing it out of spite instead of just keeping embarrassing tagged photos and videos from football games or when he ate shit at the skatepark from fucking with his “rap career”)
every once in a while i get on a kick where hes just german. like, i just replace houston texas with hamburg germany and have him apply to a university in whatever state is applicable for whoever im chatting with and it goes from there? sometimes he moved when he was little and went through the whole visa thing, sometimes he didnt go through the visa thing, sometimes hes a dual citizen because of family and shit, its all dependent on what suits the situation best. 
one that ive been fucking with for a while but hardly break out (until recently with like 5 roses in the span of one day hell yeah) is that he has a neighbor at the end of the hall who is like a thousand year old witch lady that hes basically adopted as his mother figure in lieu of not having one and shes totally cool with it, especially bc when she kicks the bucket she fully plans on giving dave all her occult stuff so her figure-skating coach and realtor daughter doesnt sell it at a garage sale and lets it all go to waste. she also once brought rose up by name in a conversation without any prompting of her existence which dave didnt realize for days, and then one time cryptically stopped and stared at an empty space in the wall, went “she has potential, you know.” then looked at him sitting on her kitchen counter with a smile “lots of it” and hes thought about that weekly ever since. (it is important to note one of the occult items he leaves her is literally her own personal book of shadows shes been filling out for decades its like a 600 page leatherbound book dave has no idea what its used for but the sheer amount of homemade spells and etc in it is like. gonna murder rose the second this chick gets her hands on it i promise you.)
theres the standard strife shit? im not rlly gonna get into those theyre all basically cookie cutter bullshit. its just standard bro and dave abuse talk. i like to inclulde the whole 24hr live cam up in the apartment that definitely watches dave in every room besides his own and the bathroom, but that quickly delves into the prospect of middle-aged men stalking him online and basically sexually harassing him in his own god damn home by talking about how they can see him just trying to take his shoes off in the living room after getting home and frankly? its not one of my best takes! but once you throw it into the headcanon bin, its there forever. 
he actually really does do something with his photography but not enough to warrant anything exciting, but he has his own branding for it and regularly takes pictures of his friends or anything else he thinks is moderately interesting enough to take pictures of, but those are just thrown into shoeboxes under his bed in favor of posting genuine shots because he wants to keep his image intact and blurry photos of jade smiling in the tree they climbed up together while bec paws at the base of it while whining isnt exactly something he wants the whole world to see.
i also pretty often but him into either paleontology OR i put him down as trying to become a mortician because he thinks handing roadkill once he graduated from museum giftshop specimens to doing his own taxidermy on the side has prepared him enough to perform an occasional autopsy and start embalming real human corpses. (sometimes i put my own desires in and make them his bc i have to project at some point and put him through the same EMT course i dropped out of bc it was one semester and he already has pretty decent first aid skills, but he definitely didnt expect it to be as fucking wild at times as it is, but whats he gonna do? get a job back at waffle house? the company hes working for just offered to pay like half his associates in paramedicine tuition and hes already got all his pre-recs done when he started for paleo. at least its a stable job and hes got the ability to be compassionate in the moment) 
im running out of things that ive done to the poor kid. OH 
hes not a virgin he had a girlfriend all four years of high school (shes also one of his optional and designated exes plz keep up) and their relationship ends in one of two ways: she dies in a car accident a week before their high school graduation, or she stops talking to him entirely a week after their high school graduation until a couple years later she gets into (guess what) a car accident with her current wife/girlfriend and dies which leaves behind their daughter. who just so happens to also be daves daughter. her name is hannah and i love her like my own but no one ever likes her and thats on the conditioning of dirk. does dave end up taking her in? yes. shes awesome and the first time he takes her to the park to like run off some fucking steam she disappears for two minutes and dave is moderately terrified until she comes back holding a dead baby squirrel and thats the moment he realizes huh maybe things really do be genetic.
ok at the bottom of the list im gonna add the couple of times hes been a camboy which usually coincides with the live apartment cam thing and the amount of people in his dms calling him hot or whatever, but typically its more of a started the day he turned 18 and basically dipped around 20 in favor of showing up randomly with no warning to complain about a video game dick in hand because it gives him an outlet that wont annoy his friends bc this is the fifteenth time hes had a lot to say this week about a certain boss battle and also the comments fuel his ego and daddy issues.
the last one wasnt the bottom but literally unless its explicitly proven otherwise every time anyone rps with me there is the underlying fact dave strider was a goalie on his high school lacrosse teams all four years and (shocker another one) definitely had the hots for one of his teammates like major hots like first gay experience hots. like it was painfully obvious that teammate also liked him back hots. like one night at a team sleepover one of the other guys was like can yall just makeout and get it over with were fucking tired and dave really had the balls to be offended and ask what the fuck they were talking about while literally sitting halfway in the mans lap bc for some reason they had to share the same chair. 
he is also guilty until proven innocent of being the worlds biggest loner outside of that sports team and even though hes literally a jock he still opts to eat his lunch alone in the hallway or something like that and has a tendency to leave girls on read, but bc hes got an in with the rest of the jocks hes basically drug around to plenty of parties and since hes conventionally attractive enough and popular in the aloof way that he is, hes got plenty of tagged insta posts and twitter directs and snapchat streaks going. 
THESE WERE ALL NO GAME AND DONT INVOLVE SHIPS BC I LIKE TO KEEP MY OPTIONS OPEN AND THEYRE LITERALLY ALL BASED OFF RPS IVE DONE I HOPE YALL JUDGE ME ACCORDINGLY
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yoonstanha · 7 years
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At Least
Pairing: Socky
Description: Sanha had been fairly confident about his new life in a new school. He would make new friends, avoid any science related subject entirely for safe measure, and he definitely wouldn't fall in love with the school's most popular boy.
Word Count: ~2.4k
Note: sorry yall im too lazy to properly read through and edit its like 1:30am let me live thanks
Sanha had been fairly confident about his new life in a new school. He was confident that he was not going to get suspended for accidentally stabbing a pair of scissors through someone's hand (Sanha learnt the hard way to never hold scissors by the handle when walking around), and he definitely wasn't going to get expelled for setting a total of three science labs on fire (accidentally, of course). He would make new friends, avoid any science related subject entirely for safe measure, and he definitely wouldn't fall in love with the school's most popular boy. Not that he had ever experienced that, but if it ended well in a movie then it certainly wouldn't end well in real life, and that was fact. If his entire school year went just as his first ten minutes, Sanha was certain that the year would be perfect. He had already successfully talked to five people, a new personal record, and had even told them a joke good enough to make them laugh. On the eleventh minute, however, Sanha's year went downhill. Sitting just behind the person he had been talking to was the most perfect boy ever, or at least he thought so. He didn't even need to know anything about this boy, but his guts told him that anyone with a face as gorgeous as what he was staring at had to be a good person. Gorgeous Boy was staring back, and Sanha had to avert his gaze in order to avoid any awkward eye contact, although it was possibly too late for that. Leaning into the nearest person, he gestured towards Gorgeous Boy and asked who he was.
"You mean Minhyuk? He's one of the richest and most popular kids in the school." Already Sanha's plan wasn't going so well. Eleven minutes in and he had fallen in love with the school richest and most popular student. "He's pretty quiet though. He hardly talks unless he's talking to Dongmin or Bin, or if he's answering a question."
"Dongmin? Bin?" Sanha hoped that they weren't even half as gorgeous as this Minhyuk boy, otherwise, he'd be in big trouble
"They're second years and the other two most rich and popular." They probably were just as gorgeous as Minhyuk, which meant that Sanha really was in big trouble. He promised himself that he’d completely avoid them, for both his own sake and theirs. Except, Sanha found out that he was horrible at keeping promises when he accidentally bumped into Minhyuk at the lockers. (But he did run away squealing a little bit as soon as the incident happened, so he wondered if he really did break his own promise)
It wasn’t until Sanha joined the choir during his second week and met a third year, Myungjun, that he really had a friend group. Previously he had just floated around group to group, but he managed to settle with the third year and his friend (or boyfriend, Sanha couldn’t be sure what their relationship was) Jinwoo. Except, being friends with Jinwoo seemed to bring a few problems in itself. Apparently, he was fairly close with Bin because they were both on the school’s dance team, which not only meant he often visited during lunch, but it also meant Minhyuk was there. Sanha considered dropping Jinwoo as a friend entirely, but he thought that may be a little too harsh and over-the-top. He would just have to learn to deal with it, a skill he learned when his older brothers would poke and prod and annoy him.
Sanha cursed Minhyuk for being a normal teenage boy who knew how to socialise with other teenage boys because that meant he had to engage in small talk with him, even if Sanha’s replies were simple noises and gestures. Sometimes he hoped that Minhyuk would give up and walk away, but would also be disappointed when he really did. Although Sanha may not have realised, Myungjun and Jinwoo had a fairly good understanding of what was going on, and when they asked Sanha if he liked Minhyuk and he answered “definitely not”, they knew for sure he did. Sanha, among many other things, was a horrible liar. So when him and Minhyuk were paired together for an assignment, he tried desperately to change partners, sputtering useless excuses to their teacher (which included things as ridiculous as “he smells like fish and I hate the smell of fish” and “I’m pretty sure he hates me a lot and I don't want to give him an opportunity to kill me”).
So they worked together. Except, Sanha’s version of “together” included no verbal communication, physical contact at all, and definitely no eye contact. Either way, they somehow managed to get an A, which Sanha suspected was because of some kind of bribe considering he was absolutely failing the subject, and Sanha went back to avoiding Minhyuk in the halls even if it meant walking in circles and getting late to class. After a while though, Sanha realised that Minhyuk was no longer seeking him out. Minhyuk no longer seemed interested in talking to him. Minhyuk no longer seemed interested in him. He didn’t want to seem petty, but he didn't realise how much he craved the attention from Minhyuk until he stopped getting it. He missed figuring out new routes around the school halls, he missed the way his heart would flutter, even if it was a nauseating feeling, and most of all he missed Minhyuk. Even when Minhyuk would follow Bin to talk to Jinwoo, Minhyuk would pay Sanha no attention, even if he stared directly at him or told his best joke yet (which Sanha knew he did, considering Myungjun had spit out all of his chocolate milk when he heard it and almost choked, too). He couldn’t even get the smallest smile out of Minhyuk.
When Jinwoo invited Sanha to his dance team’s performance, he of course expected to see Minhyuk there, but what he hadn't expected was for everyone there to know who he was. He was extra confused when they referred to him as “Minhyuk’s future boyfriend”. At first, Sanha thought he was going to have to have a word or two with Jinwoo about secrets, but when Minhyuk walked in flustered and telling everyone to stop teasing him, Sanha very quickly grew confused. Why were they teasing Minhyuk, Sanha was the one in love with him, not the other way around. He sat in confusion for a good few seconds before he realised he was staring directly at Minhyuk, who was walking toward him.
“Sanha, did you come here for Jinwoo?” Sanha snapped out of his trance and quickly tried to look anywhere but Minhyuks face or biceps or any other body part for that matter.
“Jinwoo? Oh right yeah I came for Jinwoo. I mean it's not that I didn’t come for you — or Bin for that matter — but Jinwoo did invite me—“, he was quickly cut off by Minhyuk’s delightful chuckle. Sanha decided right then and there that he must've had the best laugh in the world, that what he just heard was definitely unbeatable.
“Sanha relax. Why are you so on edge?” And why are you suddenly talking to me? Is what Minhyuk also wanted to ask, but decided against it. Sanha stayed silent and fidgeted with a loose stitch on his jacket sleeve. It wasn’t long before Minhyuk simply tapped his shoulder, letting the question slip. “You should get in the crowd, we’re about to start.”
Sanha thanked whatever God was out there for letting him out of that situation so easily because just as Minhyuk uttered those words, Sanha fled the scene as soon as possible. He could deal with Myungjun’s excitement over Jinwoo if it meant that he didn’t have to talk to Minhyuk for a solid half-an-hour. Instead of talking to Minhyuk, Sanha could gaze at his biceps and just his generally well-toned body — a new discovery for Sanha — and he told himself he totally wasn’t being biased by only paying attention to him (after all, it wasn’t Sanha’s fault that Minhyuk looked so good in that sleeveless shirt and those tight jeans). Something he couldn't deal with, however, was the way Minhyuk was silently staring across the cheap restaurant table at him, laughing along with the jokes he made, making his own comments. This was a completely different person from the cool chic Minhyuk that Sanha knew from school. This Minhyuk was cute and had a stupidly cute smile and an even stupidly cuter laugh and almost seemed like he wasn’t a child of a rich and influential family. This was the Minhyuk Sanha liked, and it wasn’t just because he paid for his meal, although that certainly was the cherry on top.
But when the next school day came around the old, boring Minhyuk that ignored Sanha was back. Sanha really hoped he wasn’t going to be forced to talk to Minhyuk first, he could manage that with anyone but Minhyuk. So instead, Sanha settled on seeing him when he was with his dance group, when he was the Minhyuk that Sanha really loved, when he was the Minhyuk that made Sanha feel great as a human being. During his bi-daily visits, he met Dongmin, Bin’s boyfriend (and he was sure this time — he saw them kiss and everything), and he slowly became close to him too. Dinner after practice seemed to be a ritual, as much as Sanha’s mother hated it, and Minhyuk paying for Sanha’s food seemed to become a regular occurrence, too. No matter how many times he refused and insisted that he’d pay, Minhyuk always seemed to be one step ahead.
Minhyuk still didn’t talk to Sanha much at school, but if Sanha had ever mentioned that he forgot his lunch that day, Minhyuk was sure to slip some money into Sanha’s locker before lunch. When Sanha would bring it up at the dance team practice later that day, Minhyuk would just smile and claim that it wasn’t him. Sanha definitely knew it was him. After about a month or so of nightly dinners, numbers began to dwindle, some claiming that they had other plans or that they had to be home for dinner. Either way, it was blatantly clear to both of them that whatever was going on was one-hundred-percent set-up and not a coincidence. Yet, neither complained, except for when Sanha would constantly whine about Minhyuk paying for all of his meals. For a solid week Sanha was so immersed in their friendship that he almost forgot he was completely in love with Minhyuk and every aspect of him. Sanha didn’t want to remember that he was in love with Minhyuk, he swears he saw him flirting with a girl once so he was almost certain he wasn't into guys. Well, either he was flirting or the girl was flirting but either way there was some kind of exchange going on and both parties seemed to be accepting said flirting. Sanha wondered if Minhyuk had ever flirted with him. “Probably not”, he thought, not wanting to get his hopes up at all (despite it being a little bit too late for that).
Sanha should’ve learnt to have higher hopes sometimes. When Minhyuk asked him to the school formal, Sanha had to ask a total of ten times if he had heard right. He definitely did. His date to the school formal was Minhyuk. If he were to be honest with himself, he was genuinely going to skip out on the formal, fancy dinners and suits weren't his thing, but if they were Minhyuk’s thing he’d definitely put up with it for a night. Minhyuk demanded to take Sanha suit shopping, claiming to know all the best places with all of the best employees, and for a second he remembered that Minhyuk was rich, of course he would know this kind of stuff. He’s probably been to formal dinners since he was born, Sanha thought. In the midst of his thought, he had been dragged into one shop in particular, and lined along the walls were blazers, dress shirts, and pants, all of different colours and styles. He let Minhyuk take him around and pick out things that he thought would be best. Minhyuk always knew best, just like how he also knew how to burp the alphabet backwards. It took Sanha no time at all to notice the price tags and almost dropped the various items he was holding on the spot. He’d never touched clothes so expensive in his entire life, but when he brought it up Minhyuk told him to stop fussing saying that it was “my treat, seriously.” Sanha grumbled. Everything was always Minhyuk’s treat.
Every time Sanha would come out of the dressing room in a new combination of clothes, Minhyuk would make sure to properly tuck in his shirt and re-tie his tie and fuss over his collar and even out his hair and almost anything to make sure Sanha looked absolutely perfect. Minhyuk thought he looked especially perfect when Sanha was pouting over the fact that he had just spent a very large amount of money on him. Sanha promised to pay him back one day when he became a famous singer with Myungjun like they planned, but even then he didn't have much hope — not many of Sanha’s plans seemed to work in his favour. Especially the one that included not falling in love with the school’s most popular boy. But that one was all Minhyuk’s fault, it was easier to blame him rather than himself.
It was also easier to blame Minhyuk for whatever had just happened. Sanha thought it was a kiss, but then again he thought a lot of things that weren’t right, so he asked Minhyuk for confirmation. Minhyuk knew everything.
“Was that… a kiss?” When Minhyuk gave him the nod of confirmation, Sanha brought his fingers up to his lips and ran off, a squealing mess.
Although he may have fallen in love with one of the school’s most popular and richest student, at least he didn’t burn down any buildings.
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girlsleeps · 6 years
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Unofficial date? & holocaust museum...
So yesterday, the dude (his name was Kohn) asked me to dinner so I said yes and we were walking. He asked me where I wanted to eat and I said I didn’t mind, we walked through the whole street and there was some loud, live jazz playing in one bar and reggae in the other. We found a falafel shop, and he asked if that was okay with me. “As long as there are veggie options” i said, “yeah it’s a falafel shop, i think you’re in luck” he said back. I then realised what a falafel was and felt embarrassed, listen, i’m stupit okay. We went up to the counter and he ordered first, the owner looked at me for my order but i told him i’d order separately- ain’t no way this guy paying for me and it being an unofficial date- hells nah. i got my falafel and sat down and we began speaking. He was funny, curious, well-spoken and travelled. He spoke a lot and asked a lot of questions, then listened intently. It was honestly the perfect ratio- it made me distrust him greatly. It was such a messy meal and when some food dropped onto my dress, he giggled at me and i laughed back. He asked me about what I was doing after dc and i told him i was meeting up with kt, he was like “how do you know her?” so i said “... we met blogging.” i didn’t think he would know what tumblr was cause he’s like 30 or something and he kept asking me about my blog and i was like god whyyyyy did i bring it up and he was like “how many people read it?” LMAO 1! 0! Who knows! I don’t even write that often. I was like “you have followers but you can’t tell how many people read your stuff” and he was like “how many do you have?” and i was like “doesn’t matter,” he insisted but i didn’t respond so he said “it’s either a lot of like 5″ and i was like “sure.” I spoke about KT and how excited i was to meet her and that we were so different but besties. He asked me what my friend (kt) blogs about so I was like dogs, skateboarding, lgbtq struggles, mom troubles. He was like “so you must like cats, don’t like sports, are straight, and love your mom,” I laughed, “close, we both dislike our moms, but apart from that, spot on.” The meal was so dry, i didn’t even finish it. He was like, “i LOVE live music, wanna go back to one of those bars and listen to it?” and i was tired af but i was like “sure” because i felt it was rude otherwise. We walked up to the reggae one we saw earlier and I started getting my ID out, he got his out too, in my head I was like ‘dude i don’t think they’re gonna id you, you old bro.’ As soon as we came in, the live band finished and started packing up (lol) but we sat down. I looked at the menu and the cocktails were like $15, sis bYE, the only other option was beer. He got a beer and i got water and he judged me af. He was nice enough, and when creepy drunk people came near me, he barricaded me from it with his body. It honestly felt like a date, it was really weird. I was staring at him for ages trying to decipher who he reminded me of, then it clicked and honest to g o d, he looked like a blonde bradley cooper. He was conventionally attractive but i was so turned off. We got back and he stayed downstairs and i went up to the room where the guys (idk their name but i’m gonna call them the Kaspars. They put our names on our bunks and since they booked together, it was under one name ‘Kaspar’ so im calling them the Kaspars. they’re basically the same). They were shirtless and half asleep and unwelcoming as usual. I went on my laptop and was chilling. Kohn came in and said hi to the guys, they mumbled back, we were all silent and went to bed. 
Didn’t set an alarm this morning and woke up late (10am). Can you believe 10am is ‘late’ for me now? Who tf have I become? One of the Kaspars was still lingering around and ruining my alone time, but the rest were out of the room by 9 at least. I took ages to get ready, took a long shower, I was in the bathroom for at least an hour. I went back in and Kohn and the Kaspars were there. Do you bitches ever leave!?! He seems to have befriended the fuckboys and planned on hanging out with them for the day. When I walked in, he asked me which tour company I used and i told him but it was already 11am and the tour began at 10, so I was like ‘have fun’ got my wallet, phone, camera and left. I was glad to be out of the room. I hated being in there. Bad vibes, man. 
I got lunch at an awful place. I ordered an $8 small veggie ravioli, what came out was neither $8, small, nor a ravioli. it was a $15 (with hidden tax and tips) medium-sized lasagna that I waited 20 minutes for! This was a fast food place.  U GH!!!! After eating 2 bites, I put it in the bin and left. Made my way down to the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History and ended up spending 2 hours there. It was so fun and interesting. I know I go to a lot of museums but this one was actually different from most science/history museums and contained a lot of cool exhibitions- I saw a real mummy!! wrapped and all. It was cool. There was also a room on geodes/space rocks and there was a bit on the mass extinction where 70% of all life forms on earth perished after the meteroite hit. It made me think about the fragility of life, but also the strength of it and the fact that life always finds a way to continue. Everyone always thinks of the apocalypse as the end of humankind, but it’s not really an apocalypse if there is even one (1) living species remaining. That could be just cockroaches, or just algae or just bacteria in the water, it doesn’t matter because life always finds a way to replenish itself. It also got me thinking about evolution and how we all evolved from one tiny bacteria cell into what we are now. A human being able to contemplate and question these things. It’s kind of crazy if you think about it.
I then made my way to the Holocaust Museum which was a really humbling and sad experience. There was this amazing interactive exhibition called “Remember the Children: Daniel's Story” it followed the story of Daniel, a Jewish child in Nazi Germany through rooms and pages of a diary (you can see some of it here). We began with a happy home and a lively kitchen with Daniel and his mom baking for their store. you then enter daniel’s room and he writes of his father’s war medal for bravery in the first world war. It soon turned into the streets of Nazi Germany with “no jews” signs and vandalised stores, then Daniel and his family were forced to move to the ghettos with strict rules and children were forced to do labour. Women had to do sewing jobs. Erika, his sister, took a risk and stole some sewing materials to make a birthday present for their mom. eventually, they ended in the concentration camps and when you walk in, you can see Erika's suitcase with one dress and a doll in it thrown to the side, daniel’s diary and his father’s war medal in a pile of other belongings taken away from them. Daniel’s mother and sister, Erika were murdered in the camps, but Daniel and his father were liberated when the war ended. It was heavy stuff. 
I went upstairs to another exhibition on America’s role in and coverage of Nazi Germany. There were polls from America in the 1940s such as ‘should we accept more Jewish refugees’ and surprise surprise like 73% said no. There were a lot of interesting polls. ‘Should America join the war?’ 93% no. Do you believe Germans are killing Jewish people in camps? 63% yes. Should usa refuse to participate in the olympics (held in Germany) in protest? 64% no 44% yes. There were protests against nazism (a big one held on the 10th of may!) and there were movements in the US FOR nazism (fucking gross, i know). There was also encouragement from the first lady, eleanor roosevelt to allow migrants to seek refuge in the US, many people agreed, calling it “a simple act of humanity” but other organisations that wanted to stop all immigration (including children younger than 14) due to American unemployment. “My heart yearns for these people, but it yearns more for American families who we must put first,” is what they said as justification. The same people also didn’t want to go to war. As a pacifist, that should have made me feel happy, but it didn’t. They didn’t give a fuck about the moral justifications for killing, they just didn’t want to intervene and liberate the Jewish from Nazi rule because it cost American lives and money. Obviously, I don’t believe war is ever good for anything bUT that doesn’t mean turning a blind eye to the suffering and injustice around you. Why is violence the only answer? The area of the exhibition based on immigration really freaking reminded of the same thing we’re going through now. That the whole world is run on greed. Speaking of, there was an amazing Charlie Chaplain quote that played in the section on the portrayal of Nazism in Hollywood. In Chaplain’s final speech from The Great Dictator (a movie in which he plays both a jewish doctor with amnesia and a caricature version of Hitler), the jewish doctor gets his identity mistaken for hitler’s and is asked to give a speech. While rest of the movie is more satirically comical, the end is sobering as he says “I’m sorry, but I don’t want to be an emperor. That’s not my business. I don’t want to rule or conquer anyone. I should like to help everyone - if possible - Jew, Gentile - black man - white. We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other’s happiness - not by each other’s misery. We don’t want to hate and despise one another. In this world there is room for everyone. And the good earth is rich and can provide for everyone. The way of life can be free and beautiful, but we have lost the way. Greed has poisoned men’s souls, has barricaded the world with hate, has goose-stepped us into misery and bloodshed. [...] More than machinery we need humanity. More than cleverness we need kindness and gentleness. Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost.” I stan Charlie Chaplain.
USA were finally thrust into the war, but only due to their desire for revenge after Japan’s bombing of Pearl Harbour in Hawaii (they detained people of Japanese decent in the usa after this, it was horrible. All the while they campaign for the end of nazism, there was so much racism occuring in the states much closer to home). 6 million~ jews died in europe and 60 million people died in World War 2. I once again deduce that humans are horrendous.
There’s so much more I could write about, I could write in detail about the whole exhibit but one really must experience it for themselves, and one should really look into themselves to truly experience what I felt. You can read most of the information I saw in the museum displayed *here.* As heavy as it was, I enjoyed it.
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scalperhero-blog · 6 years
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I am dyslexic so i am so sorry for the really bad grammer okay so i guess i will start with why i turned to youtube in the first place. My name is CJ otherwise known as scalperhero and i am from the Uk i have always been a indoor person i don't really like to go outside at all apart from when i need to or if i'm with my family i have always been a gamer and i loved to play games i like to entertain people always have enjoyed making people smile i have been like that since i was in school witch i left at the age of 11 years old. my reason for leaving is because i am dyslexic and the school i was going to wouldn't teach me due to me needing special needs to be able to learn it was always hard to learn and it still very much is the way i was able to learn how to read and spell was due to the fact on how many games i played a lot of them back then you needed to read other wise the story would make no sense and due to learning how to read the story with in the games i was able to learn about spelling don't get me wrong i still have a very hard time with reading big words and spelling and also if you are reading this you will also learn that i have a mega problem with is grammar. grammar is something that i will never be able to do right and for spelling i also use spell check so its not like i just sit there feeling sorry for myself i do really try my hardest in everything i do :)... growing up i also never had any friends i had no real interest in having friends since i was always bullied and i saw everyone as a bully so i didn't really get clowns to anyone and i pretty much became a class clown and when i saw smiles on people face's i felt like i had achieved a little something even tho i was also thinking that i might not be able to do it again i still felt joy in the fact that i was able to make people smile so i set my life goal to always try and make people smile and happy as i believe that everyone should be able to have that feeling :).. so i thought you no what the best way to do that is to be a entertainer i pretty much set that as my goal but i also had the problem of not liking to go outside and i still don't like to go outside unless i have to or if im spending time with my family so really the best way for me to be able to stay inside and provide entertainment for other people was to try my best to try and make guys so as a child i tried coming up with my own board games and card games it was sooo much fun making them a a kid don't get me wrong only me and my mother would play them as she was all i had as a child in terms of family the rest of my family pretty much wanted nothing to do with me and as i got older the idea of making computer games got more and more into my head so i thought to myself i wonder if that would be possible for me to do my mother would support me all the way for that but as for everyone else no matter who i talked to about it teachers other kids other family members all said that i will never be able to do stuff like that in my life and to just give up trying to go for a dream like that so with people telling me that i started keeping games to myself so all the games i came up with just pretty much went in the bin in the end as they was never going to be played by other people. then in 2005 youtube started up and well i saw a chance but ofc at that point i didn't have the stuff to make a video or anything like that so i was just stuck watching youtube. as time went on and i started getting older i started saving up every little money i could get my hands on and in 2012 i manage to get my hands on the gear that i finally needed to start my channel. the reason behind starting my channel is because i wanted to combine the two things i love doing the most witch is playing video games and making people smile by trying my best to entertaining them no i wasn't going to make my channel but i got a lot of support from my loving girlfriend at the time that said that this is something that i could do i say girlfriend at the time because that girlfriend then in my wife now and for the past 4 years she has been supporting me in my youtube channel and also back then she believed that i could also make my very own video game she has been the one to fund my channel and my game making for the past 4 years and she also still believes that i will one day get my dream come true so after years and years of my life of been nothing but put down by everyone i knew even my family i now have a game in a beta witch was made by rpg maker i know that might not seem much to many people but to me that is a start of my dream come true since my dyslexic is a big problem in my life i can not learn coding so i cant sit there and code a game do to that problem so rpg maker is the only way i can go . and i also have my youtube channel witch is at 700+ subscribers in 4 years time the date to day i have written this out is 28/11/2016 and i started my channel 28/11/2012 so i have been on youtube for 4 years today witch i am really happy about so i can also tell you that as long as you don't let people get you down then you can do great things i have a people that like my content and i thank them all for supporting me well i guess that is my story guys i hope you enjoy it Thanks for reading i hope to see you all around sometime please forgive me for any spelling mistakes and i beg you to forgive me for the very very bad grammar and again thank you very much ps im now 27 years old i have a wife and 2 kids so just with that alone i have a great life me making my game and having my youtube channel is just a bonus for me in my life and are also apart of my life goals :) Ok ever since i was little i wanted to be a game developer! I finally feel that this dream is coming true through the use of RPG maker. The game i crave to design isn't easy for me as i feel it will take more time and effort than MOST people have in this world. I have lived my life knowing i have learning disability's, causing a difficulty for me to use software that need me to do any necessary programming like c++ in my games. This is why i have decided to utilise the simplicity of the rpg maker, as i don't need to use coding for the games design. So over the years i was criticised for my plans when wanting to make games. Having spent most of my life trying to improve my skills i now feel ready (with the help of a few friends) to prove that even when you dreaming big without the support of family and some friends you can always achieve your goals. My name is Chris i am a full time youtuber and a father of two. I work at my hardest when designing my own games spending months just talking and discussing ideas that should and shouldn't be included within it's content. This game i'm working on even tho i'm using the rpg maker vx ace this game is going to be as big for you, as it has been for me, in it's design and construction. I hope that i have given you all the entertainment you need for the future. Peace!
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