#imagine being conditioned into basing half of your identity around being a parent to your siblings since age 10

[brainrot--central]

saw a few comments about on it on twitter but it IS kind of fucked that eddie soul lowkey conditioned his child into being another parent to roro and lala when he definitely had the means to hire a nanny/babysitter

but there's no trace of one in the flashbacks and lore seems to indicate that rody had to do the caretaking when eddie wasn't there

like i get that it's the Eldest Child plight but if you can afford a nice house you can absolutely afford not putting that amount of responsibility to a like 10-yo kid??

a theory COULD be that he knew very early on that he was already threatened by humarize back then and was training rody to take care of himself and roro+lala to the point of gifting the pendant

it's way too early to be overthinking this

[mst3kproject]

Exo-Man

Failed series pilots were very much part of MST3K’s stock in trade.  We’ve sat through San Francisco International, Stranded in Space, Code Name: Diamond Head and I’m sure there were others.  I generally recall all of those movies being kind of dull and lacking in personality, and I can’t imagine this 70’s superhero mess being much better.  I don’t think anybody in Exo-Man was ever on MST3K but Jose Ferrer (the first Latino actor to win an academy award, for 1950’s Cyrano de Bergerac) was once in a movie called Zoltan, Hound of Dracula, which I am deeply remiss in not having seen yet.  You may also recognize Harry Morgan, who was Colonel Potter on M*A*S*H.

Dr. Nick Conrad is a wacky physics professor of the type nobody has ever encountered in real life.  He’s somehow both smart enough to invent anti-gravity and memory plastic, and stupid enough to chase after a fleeing would-be bank robber.  The latter stunt, set to wakka-chicka Mitchell music, makes Nick the target of a mafia assassin, who kills his lab assistant and leaves Nick himself paralyzed from the waist down.  He wallows in self-pity for a while, but then rediscovers his passion for invention and builds himself a suit of armor that will allow him to walk again… and to take on the mob single-handedly.

I don’t know why they called the movie Exo-Man.  That name is never used in the dialogue.  I guess the more accurate Fiberglass Avenger just wouldn’t have sounded as cool.

The first thing you’re likely to notice from the plot summary is that Nick’s story starts off as Dr. Strange and then takes a hard left into Iron Man.  I’m pretty sure the latter at least was an intentional ripoff, with bits of the first thrown in, knowingly or not, to distance Exo-Man from Marvel’s lawyers. What’s funny is that posterity has actually made it a hat trick: the movie opens with a weirdly homoerotic jogging scene, so now he gets to be Captain America, too!

Exo-Man is a really stupid, often boring, and consistently ugly movie.  The actors are mediocre, the music bland, the effects terrible, and stuff is made to look ‘high tech’ by sticking lots of blinky lights on it.  Way too much time passes before we get to the action and when we do, we find a deep pit of disappointment.  Yet at the same time… I kind of enjoyed it.

A major part of why has got to be the incredibly dopey super-suit the main character wears, which looks less like ‘Iron Man’ and more like ‘Fiberglass Commando Cody’.  It moves really slowly and I doubt the guy in the costume can see very much.  Nick controls the bottom half of it using switches on one sleeve, which appear to have simple functions like ‘sit’, ‘walk’, and ‘jump’ (there is, of course, no ‘run,’ because nothing happens fast in this movie). He puts the thing on by lying down in what looks like a tanning bed (or maybe one of those contraptions from Avatar).  My personal favourite is the warning light labeled malfuntion.

All this is in a movie that sometimes manages to be surprisingly subtle.  We are introduced to Nick while jogging, we watch him play tennis with his girlfriend, and see him maintain this exercise regime even while he’s supposed to be under police protection.  These shots are in brilliant sunshine, and the camerawork is as active as the subjects. Post-injury, Nick never outwardly complains about his inability to participate in sports, but we now see him sitting in his wheelchair in dark surroundings, with the camera held perfectly still.  We feel that he has lost something he loved dearly, and we never need to be told it outright.

We are also introduced to Nick as somebody who is devored to furthering minorities.  His two lab assistants are an east Asian student and a Jewish one (the latter identified as such by a surname, rather than appearance), and the reason he was at the bank was to help a Latino student get a loan.  Again, the script trusts the audience to get this without having to draw attention to it through dialogue.  These minority characters are, of course, still just accessories to Nick’s story. The Jewish guy in particular is there to be fridged – its his death that leads to Nick flaunting his police protection and getting hurt.  But the effort was made to say that minority rights are important to Nick, without hitting us over the head with it.

Theme-wise, Exo-Man is about a man coming to terms with a disability.  I should preface this by saying that I am not disabled, so my perspective is necessarily biased.  If anything I say below is offensive, that is out of ignorance, and please let me know so that I may edit or delete the review and do better next time.  I was actually pretty impressed by how the script and director handled the life-changing nature of Nick’s injury… mostly.  I’ll start with the bad stuff.

The attack on Nick comes with a heaping helping of victim blaming.  As an important witness in the bank robbery, he was offered police protection.  The assassin tries to get around this by putting a bomb in his car, but one of the lab assistants borrows the car for a late-night pizza run, and gets killed in Nick’s stead.  This leads Nick to deliberately place himself in a vulnerable position, hoping to draw the killer out for capture and punishment.  In the hospital with a broken back, Nick blames the police for failing to protect him, but I’m pretty sure the movie wants us to think that this is really Nick’s own fault.  Like the tragic accident victims in Days of our Years, he has nobody to blame for his own misery, or that of his loved ones, except himself.

After that, however, the movie’s treatment of Nick’s disability improves quickly.  His girlfriend Emily leaves him, but that’s not because he’s in a wheelchair, it’s because he’s too busy wallowing in self-pity to even let her into his apartment. Later when he apologizes to her, she takes him back and they resume their happy relationship, and the fact that they can’t play tennis together anymore is not an issue.  She does not treat him as something to be pitied, she speaks to him on his eye level, and they avoid that weird trope of having the abled partner sit in the wheelchair-user’s lap.  Emily loves who Nick is, not what he can do.  His colleagues and students, likewise, treat him with respect and help him with his chair, and never make the latter feel like a burden.

By the end of the film Nick has come to terms with his disability.  The suit he’s built is not a cure for his condition: in fact the first time he wears it out, it breaks down and he needs help getting back to his high-tech armored van.  It’s a tool he has built for a purpose, and he doesn’t feel the need to wear it in non-superhero situations.  Based on what we see, he could have built a legs-only version to wear under his trousers and let him go jogging and play tennis again, but that is no longer who Nick is.  And when and whether to wear the suit is always Nick’s own choice, not something imposed on him from the outside.

Of course, it would also be really helpful in later maintaining Exo-Man’s secret identity, and I suspect the writers were thinking of that a lot more than they were of things like parents forcing questionable ‘cures’ on disabled children.  The secret identity probably would have been a big deal if the pilot had sold, but in this stand-alone story, I thought the suit worked well as a metaphor about a disabled man at peace with himself.

Exo-Man also takes a quick little peek at the morality of vigilante justice, although this comes in pretty late and clearly isn’t something they wanted to get into in any detail.  The first person Nick confronts in the suit is the assassin who actually beat him up. He says he didn’t go into this encounter with any real plan… perhaps he just wanted to scare the guy.  What ultimately happens is that the assassin climbs a drainpipe to get away from the terrifying robot man, the pipe comes off the wall, and the man falls to his death.  Nick feels this is his fault, and so the next time he takes the suit out he does so with a particular goal in mind: he wants to capture the mob boss and provide evidence of his wrongdoing to the police, not to kill anyone.

The mob boss’ name, by the way, is Kermit Haas, which is probably the least intimidating name a movie has ever given to its big bad.

Would that work?  Is evidence a guy in a robot suit left in your dumpster for you admissible in court?  Isn’t where stuff was found kind of important?  I honestly have no idea and I’m not sure how to go about finding out.  People might wonder why I want to know and I don’t think saying it’s for my blog would allay their suspicions.

At the end of Exo-Man, I was more entertained than not, but mostly on the level of laughing at the dumb-looking suit and appreciating the fine art of ripping off comic book characters.  If that’s your kind of thing then this movie ought to put the fun in malfuntion for you. If that’s not your thing, well… this is an MST3K blog.  What are you doing here?

[theadmiringbog]

Routinely sleeping less than six or seven hours a night demolishes your immune system, more than doubling your risk of cancer. Insufficient sleep is a key lifestyle factor determining whether or not you will develop Alzheimer’s disease. Inadequate sleep—even moderate reductions for just one week—disrupts blood sugar levels so profoundly that you would be classified as pre-diabetic. Short sleeping increases the likelihood of your coronary arteries becoming blocked and brittle, setting you on a path toward cardiovascular disease, stroke, and congestive heart failure. Fitting Charlotte Brontë’s prophetic wisdom that “a ruffled mind makes a restless pillow,” sleep disruption further contributes to all major psychiatric conditions, including depression, anxiety, and suicidality.

--

Too little sleep swells concentrations of a hormone that makes you feel hungry while suppressing a companion hormone that otherwise signals food satisfaction. Despite being full, you still want to eat more. It’s a proven recipe for weight gain in sleep-deficient adults and children alike.                

--

imagine the birth of your first child. 

At the hospital, the doctor enters the room and says, “Congratulations, it’s a healthy baby boy. We’ve completed all of the preliminary tests and everything looks good.” She smiles reassuringly and starts walking toward the door. However, before exiting the room she turns around and says, “There is just one thing. From this moment forth, and for the rest of your child’s entire life, he will repeatedly and routinely lapse into a state of apparent coma. It might even resemble death at times. And while his body lies still his mind will often be filled with stunning, bizarre hallucinations. This state will consume one-third of his life and I have absolutely no idea why he’ll do it, or what it is for. Good luck!”                

--

Sleep enriches a diversity of functions, including our ability to learn, memorize, and make logical decisions and choices. Benevolently servicing our psychological health, sleep recalibrates our emotional brain circuits, allowing us to navigate next-day social and psychological challenges with cool-headed composure.                

--

Dreaming provides a unique suite of benefits to all species fortunate enough to experience it, humans included. Among these gifts are a consoling neurochemical bath that mollifies painful memories and a virtual reality space in which the brain melds past and present knowledge, inspiring creativity.                

--

Most unfortunately, owls are more chronically sleep-deprived, having to wake up with the larks, but not being able to fall asleep until far later in the evening. Owls are thus often forced to burn the proverbial candle at both ends.                

--

Melatonin is the voice of the timing official that says “Runners, on your mark,” and then fires the starting pistol that triggers the race. That timing official (melatonin) governs when the race (sleep) begins, but does not participate in the race. In this analogy, the sprinters themselves are other brain regions and processes that actively generate sleep. Melatonin corrals these sleep-generating regions of the brain to the starting line of bedtime. Melatonin simply provides the official instruction to commence the event of sleep, but does not participate in the sleep race itself.                

--

For every day you are in a different time zone, your suprachiasmatic nucleus can only readjust by about one hour. It therefore took me about eight days to readjust to London time after having been in San Francisco, since London is eight hours ahead of San Francisco.                

--

When shut off from any outside world influences, our natural circadian rhythm is innately longer than one day—about twenty-four hours and fifteen minutes.                

--

Your twenty-four-hour circadian rhythm is the first of the two factors determining wake and sleep. The second is sleep pressure.                 

At this very moment, a chemical called adenosine is building up in your brain. It will continue to increase in concentration with every waking minute that elapses. The longer you are awake, the more adenosine will accumulate. Think of adenosine as a chemical barometer that continuously registers the amount of elapsed time since you woke up this morning.                

--

Before bed, you diligently set your alarm for 6:00 a.m. Miraculously, however, you woke up at 5:58 a.m., unassisted, right before the alarm. Your brain, it seems, is still capable of logging time with quite remarkable precision while asleep.                

--

REM sleep, in which brain activity was almost identical to that when we are awake, was intimately connected to the experience we call dreaming, and is often described as dream sleep.                

--

The cerebral war between the two is won and lost every ninety minutes, ruled first by NREM sleep, followed by the comeback of REM sleep.                

--

REM sleep ushers you into a preposterous theater wherein you are treated to a bizarre, highly associative carnival of autobiographical themes. When it comes to information processing, think of the wake state principally as reception (experiencing and constantly learning the world around you), NREM sleep as reflection (storing and strengthening those raw ingredients of new facts and skills), and REM sleep as integration (interconnecting these raw ingredients with each other, with all past experiences, and, in doing so, building an ever more accurate model of how the world works, including innovative insights and problem-solving abilities).                

--

We’d be carried to bed, slumbering and unaware, by those older siblings or parents who could stay awake. The reason is not simply that children need more sleep than their older siblings or parents, but also that the circadian rhythm of a young child runs on an earlier schedule. Children therefore become sleepy earlier and wake up earlier than their adult parents. Adolescent teenagers, however, have a different circadian rhythm from their young siblings. During puberty, the timing of the suprachiasmatic nucleus is shifted progressively forward: a change that is common across all adolescents, irrespective of culture or geography. So far forward, in fact, it passes even the timing of their adult parents.                

--

As a nine-year-old, the circadian rhythm would have the child asleep by around nine p.m., driven in part by the rising tide of melatonin at this time in children. By the time that same individual has reached sixteen years of age, their circadian rhythm has undergone a dramatic shift forward in its cycling phase. The rising tide of melatonin, and the instruction of darkness and sleep, is many hours away. As a consequence, the sixteen-year-old will usually have no interest in sleeping at nine p.m. Instead, peak wakefulness is usually still in play at that hour. By the time the parents are getting tired, as their circadian rhythms take a downturn and melatonin release instructs sleep—perhaps around ten or eleven p.m., their teenager can still be wide awake. A few more hours must pass before the circadian rhythm of a teenage brain begins to shut down alertness and allow for easy, sound sleep to begin.                

--

If this remains perplexing to parents, a different way to frame and perhaps appreciate the mismatch is this: asking your teenage son or daughter to go to bed and fall asleep at ten p.m. is the circadian equivalent of asking you, their parent, to go to sleep at seven or eight p.m.                

--

Furthermore, asking that same teenager to wake up at seven the next morning and function with intellect, grace, and good mood is the equivalent of asking you, their parent, to do the same at four or five a.m.                

--

There was once an education policy in the US known as “No child left behind.” Based on scientific evidence, a new policy has rightly been suggested by my colleague Dr. Mary Carskadon: “No child needs caffeine.”                

--

As you enter your fourth decade of life, there is a palpable reduction in the electrical quantity and quality of that deep NREM sleep. You obtain fewer hours of deep sleep, and those deep NREM brainwaves become smaller, less powerful, and fewer in number. Passing into your mid- and late forties, age will have stripped you of 60 to 70 percent of the deep sleep you were enjoying as a young teenager. By the time you reach seventy years old, you will have lost 80 to 90 percent of your youthful deep sleep.                

--

The older we get, the more frequently we wake up throughout the night. There are many causes, including interacting medications and diseases, but chief among them is a weakened bladder. Older adults therefore visit the bathroom more frequently at night. Reducing fluid intake in the mid- and late evening can help, but it is not a cure-all. Due                

--

... sleep efficiency, defined as the percent of time you were asleep while in bed. If you spent eight hours in bed, and slept for all eight of those hours, your sleep efficiency would be 100 percent. If you slept just four of those eight hours, your sleep efficiency would be 50 percent. As healthy teenagers, we enjoyed a sleep efficiency of about 95 percent. As a reference anchor, most sleep doctors consider good-quality sleep to involve a sleep efficiency of 90 percent or above. By the time we reach our eighties, sleep efficiency has often dropped below 70 or 80 percent; 70 to 80 percent may sound reasonable until you realize that, within an eight-hour period in bed, it means you will spend as much as one to one and a half hours awake.                

--

In sharp contrast to adolescents, seniors commonly experience a regression in sleep timing, leading to earlier and earlier bedtimes. The cause is an earlier evening release and peak of melatonin as we get older, instructing an earlier start time for sleep. Restaurants in retirement communities have long known of this age-related shift in bedtime preference, epitomized (and accommodated) by the “early-bird special.”                

--

But what seems like an innocent doze has a damaging consequence. The early-evening snooze will jettison precious sleep pressure, clearing away the sleepiness power of adenosine that had been steadily building throughout the day. Several hours later, when that older individual gets into bed and tries to fall asleep, they may not have enough sleep pressure to fall asleep quickly, or stay asleep as easily.                

--

Older adults who want to shift their bedtimes to a later hour should get bright-light exposure in the late-afternoon hours. I am not, however, suggesting that older adults stop exercising in the morning. Exercise can help solidify good sleep, especially in the elderly. Instead, I advise two modifications for seniors. First, wear sunglasses during morning exercise outdoors. This will reduce the influence of morning light being sent to your suprachiasmatic clock that would otherwise keep you on an early-to-rise schedule. Second, go back outside in the late afternoon for sunlight exposure, but this time do not wear sunglasses. Make sure to wear sun protection of some sort, such as a hat, but leave the sunglasses at home. Plentiful later-afternoon daylight will help delay the evening release of melatonin, helping push the timing of sleep to a later hour. Older                

-

AMAZING BREAKTHROUGH! Scientists have discovered a revolutionary new treatment that makes you live longer. It enhances your memory and makes you more creative. It makes you look more attractive. It keeps you slim and lowers food cravings. It protects you from cancer and dementia. It wards off colds and the flu. It lowers your risk of heart attacks and stroke, not to mention diabetes. You’ll even feel happier, less depressed, and less anxious. Are you interested?                

--

Sleep is the universal health care provider: whatever the physical or mental ailment, sleep has a prescription it can dispense.                

--

Sleep before learning refreshes our ability to initially make new memories. It does so each and every night. While we are awake, the brain is constantly acquiring and absorbing novel information (intentionally or otherwise).                

--

The second benefit of sleep for memory comes after learning, one that effectively clicks the “save” button on those newly created files. In doing so, sleep protects newly acquired information, affording immunity against forgetting: an operation called consolidation.                

--

We had observed a real-estate transaction that takes place each night when we sleep. Fitting the notion of a long-wave radio signal that carries information across large geographical distances, the slow brainwaves of deep NREM had served as a courier service, transporting memory packets from a temporary storage hold (hippocampus) to a more secure, permanent home (the cortex). In doing so, sleep had helped future-proof those memories.                

--

your brain will continue to improve skill memories in the absence of any further practice. It is really quite magical. Yet, that delayed, “offline” learning occurs exclusively across a period of sleep, and not across equivalent time periods spent awake, regardless of whether the time awake or time asleep comes first. Practice does not make perfect. It is practice, followed by a night of sleep, that leads to perfection.                

--

The 100-meter sprint superstar Usain Bolt has, on many occasions, taken naps in the hours before breaking the world record, and before Olympic finals in which he won gold. Our own studies support his wisdom: daytime naps that contain sufficient numbers of sleep spindles also offer significant motor skill memory improvement, together with a restoring benefit on perceived energy and reduced muscle fatigue.                

--

A final benefit of sleep for memory is arguably the most remarkable of all: creativity. Sleep provides a nighttime theater in which your brain                

--

a momentary lapse in concentration, called a microsleep.                

--

chronically sleep restricted, defined as getting less than seven hours of sleep a night on a routine basis.                

-

During a microsleep, your brain becomes blind to the outside world for a brief moment—and not just the visual domain, but in all channels of perception. Most of the time you have no awareness of the event. More problematic is that your decisive control of motor actions, such as those necessary for operating a steering wheel or a brake pedal, will momentarily cease. As a result, you don’t need to fall asleep for ten to fifteen seconds to die while driving. Two seconds will do it. A two-second microsleep at 30 mph with a modest angle of drift can result in your vehicle transitioning entirely from one lane to the next. This includes into oncoming traffic. Should this happen                

--

Don’t take naps after 3 p.m.                

--

Sleep experts recommend that, if you have problems falling asleep, you should get an hour of exposure to morning sunlight and turn down the lights before bedtime.

[fox-bright]

Let me talk about doctors for a minute.

I’m seeing some “doctors think more logically than you do” and “doctors don’t make judgments based on their emotions” and “you should 100% trust your doctor” stuff going around right now, and it kind of scares the shit out of me.

Absolutely you should be able to trust your doctor.  Absolutely you should hope that they’re looking at you as dispassionately as possible when considering your privileges, and as mercifully as possible when considering your needs. And if you get four doctors telling you the same thing, probably you should listen to them.  If you’re told you need PT, if you’re told you should consider the merits of this medication or that one, you should take it into consideration. You should be able to work with your doctor toward your best health outcome, regardless of if you like them very much.

But doctors are people.  And people are capable of all sorts of bullshit.  People get tired.  People mix things up. People are prisoners of their prejudices, unless they are constantly fighting them.  And to fight them they’d have to a)recognize them and b)realize that they’re wrong things to believe, and frankly most people are just not capable of that on any constant basis.

And even if we’re not talking about the forcible sterilization of Native American women and of women in prison, even if we’re not talking about the Tuskegee Syphilis Experiment, even if we’re not talking about all the ways that doctors in the US have manipulated and abused the communities they were supposed to be serving, just on an individual level falling to the belief that a)your doctor knows everything and b) your doctor really, really cares about you?  That can be very dangerous.

So let me tell you a little story.

My mother and her twin sister were born in Anaheim, CA, in 1960.  They were born with what today would be recognized as acute asthma, and they spent their first twenty years very, very sick a great deal of the time.  Constantly in and out of the hospital.  Both their parents were smokers (it was the Sixties! The years of asthma cigarettes were barely past, and lots of people still believed in ‘smoking for your health’) and it was California before the unleaded fuel laws, before pollution regulations of any sort.  My mother and her twin both nearly died on many occasions, their lungs slamming shut like books.

So my grandma, she took them to a lot of doctors.  But even before the days of big insurance, that wasn’t cheap, and the family was poor. So when after a decade or so she found a doctor with a big smile, a doctor who was locally renowned for the survival rates of his asthma patients, a doctor who obviously really, really knew what he was doing, that’s the one she stuck with.

And she didn’t much question him, when he said that my mother’s asthma and my aunt’s asthma were different kinds, and that they needed to each take a different kind of medicine, and that Grandma needed to be very, very careful not to mix them up.

You see...Mom and my auntie, they were identical twins.  That is, genetic clones.  Exactly the same in so very many ways.

And this was before ethics boards, this was before medicine and research had any expectation of or regulation for informed consent.  The doctor told you what to do, and you did it, and that was that.

And my mother, and my mother’s twin, were only half-white.

Do you see where this is going?

This wasn’t a hundred years ago.  This was by this point the mid-Seventies. Bell-bottoms and disco, Bowie was Ziggy Stardust and the Thin White Duke, the first series of Star Trek had already been off the air for several years. This was only a minute ago, you guys.  When you walk into a vintage store, you see clothing that’s older than what this doctor did to my family.

You’ve probably been through middle school science.  You know that when doing an experiment you need your control group--the one that doesn’t change--and your experimental, right? The one that gets some new condition or stressor?

And the doctor flipped a coin, or chose some other way at random, and he gave my mother the control. That is, Mom lucked out and got the medicine that was already known to him to work pretty well.

And my auntie, my doomed, beautiful auntie, was made into an experiment.

When my mother describes those years, she says that her sister “looked like a burn victim.”  Auntie’s skin sloughed off in sheets.  She got cataracts, her hair fell out in chunks, she couldn’t be out in the sunlight.  She developed all sorts of interesting food allergies (who the fuck is allergic to red #40, to the point of anaphylaxis?), her bone density suffered, and basically if you want to imagine a nasty side-effect there’s a fair chance she had it.

And the doctor? He wrote a fucking paper.  Maybe several. And he never told Grandma what he was doing.  And he never told his test subjects what he was doing.  And he was a pioneer, he saved lives, he pushed the knowledge of asthma forward by a lot, I’m sure. But he didn’t ask. He didn’t see any reason to. Mom and my Auntie were half Filipino.  White, Protestant Grandma dared to marry a Filipino-American man, and a Catholic besides!  She couldn’t be trusted with any serious decision.

And so my aunt suffered all sorts of unpleasant repercussions of that treatment for the rest of her life, until she died at a mere 52 years old.

What I am saying is, doctors are people. That is all they are.  People with their prejudices and their greed, people with their soft hearts and their emotional exhaustion.  They’re not somehow special or more or better than anyone else is. They’re just people who have been to a bit more schooling than the average Jane.  You want to tell me that architects are somehow more logical in their life decisions than someone else?  That lawyers are less likely to be prejudiced? That entomologists are more trustworthy than, say, artists, if we’re talking about anything other than bugs?

I’ve known doctors who were excellent human beings. But that wasn’t because they were doctors, it was a sideline to that fact.  Some people certainly become doctors because they have good hearts.  But let’s be honest--most of them do it for the money.  And while there’s nothing wrong with choosing a career for the lifestyle it’s going to provide you, doing so doesn’t make you a better person.

They’re just PEOPLE. And people have so very, very many flaws.

[freechoicedreamer]

Body and Soul (Ch. 2)

AO3

A side note: a potential plea against the 'canon-compliant' claim - a fundamental premise set out to both stories of this alternate Final Season series - may come from the background seen on the thematic illustration of this chapter. It is a screenshot of the United Realms, as portrayed in one of the final scenes of OUAT series finale. Despite the clear visual evidence, I refuted the idea of all realms being this closely gathered around Storybrooke, seemingly as if they were mere aggregated parts of one single town. I based my assumption on the likelihood that practical production/logistics issues were more prevalent than the need to craft more carefully a setup that would not imply on geopolitical garbage and storytelling nonsense. To be honest, that came with no surprise, even for OUAT typical narrative patterns, well known for not going beyond a superficial and only apparent coherence; after all the series finale condition loosened the need of establishing a minimum continuity level. As a matter of fact, the image appears to be just an iconic concept instead of an accurate representation of a real (and reliable) geographic distribution of the united realms. Actually, it looks - more likely - as a random collage of castles and kingdoms (taken from some OUAT-CGI database) quickly assembled for just one single and short scene. In other words, one may argue that this conclusion is open to interpretation but I may counter argue that the concept all realms physically gathered like all-stuck-together has not been consolidated-by-a-solid-narrative enough to acquire the 'canon' status. In summary, in any feasible configuration, even taking into account the innumerable storytelling possibilities opened by the 'magic' combined with 'mixed fairy tales' formula, the realms should be, at least, a little bit more physically spread, say... throughout the territory of Maine, for instance. That would assure to each kingdom a minimum space to breathe without culturally suffocating their neighborhood neither being suffocated in reverse, thus preserving their original identity. That is the premise I chose to assume, as proposed by the thematic illustration on the previous chapter. 

Opening theme

There are people who paint it as the absolute absence of heat; there are those who imagine it as the infinite absence of cold. Neither cold nor heat, neither ice nor fire, there are souls who know it as the absolute absence of love, the pinnacle of hopelessness, the utter void of hatred, the utmost devastation of war, the despair of hunger and thirst, the desolation of loneliness, the consummation of envy, the slavery of the ego, and the corrosion of jealousy. For as far as these souls know, more than the absence of the breath of Life, more than Death itself, Hell is the lack of Significance.

*

Storybrooke, Sweet-Jones home

Emma and Emm are spending the afternoon together, one more afternoon in a recent row of three afternoons together at Hope's insistent requests, always justified as being “very important, Mommy”. Visiting Luna, Missy, Aunt Em, and the Belly Babies is the recurring excuse. Usually, Emma does not like to fulfill all requests for not spoiling her daughter too much but, given the current exceptional circumstances, she has found it best to give in to the girl’s wishes. And for her it is also nice, she loves talking to her sister. Each day the two realize how deeply bonded, by mysterious ties that transcend any purely familiar connection, they are. And so, here they are, sitting by the kitchen counter for a little snack while Hope runs around the house playing with the two pets. If times were different, Hope would be at Storybrooke’s Kindergarten so that Emma could work half term, but because of the exceptionalism of the moment, she took a leave of her Sheriff duties thus freeing herself to observe– and to protect - her daughter more closely.

“It's amazing how the loft became the exact expression of you and Key, Emm. I never imagined that you two would be able so soon to superimpose your personality on the legacy of who was once known as 'Mary Margaret'. The aggregated details are just a few pieces and touches here and there, such as the paintings on the walls, new curtains, a new rug, other quilt covers on the beds, but all the little details make up a whole that adds to the atmosphere in an incredibly harmonious way, not to mention the musical instruments on the mezzanine - where once was my room, creating a magical atmosphere. Your music is really magic, you know that, don’t you? It lights up the house."

"Thanks, Emma, coming from you the compliment has a special significance to me. While Mary Margaret lived here under a curse that prevented her of being close to her daughter, in a parallel reality, my mother was fulfilling the dream that was denied to yours: the dream of seeing her kid growing up, of being able to raise her daughter together with her Prince Charming. Therefore, it is a deep honor for me to live in this space, you know, it is with reverence that Key and I add such 'little details' to the vintage decor. You see…” she then starts to pointing to the objects, “these nautical-motivated paintings are all Key’s, except that canvas that we both painted ‘magically’ during the Sweet Suite adventure. There are also those oceanic-motivated frames and the big starfish, which is a magic connection with Alice - her and Robyn’s gifts to us, something like our ‘wedding gift’, and those two landscape paintings near the sofa, which are my Henry's gift. Other than that, the curtains, the bedspreads and the rug were manually woven on Hearty Island, one of my hobbies there. Now, about the magic music, I think you and I have it in our heart – and I know that not because I watched your ‘music in the heart’ story through the magic mirror, but because I feel it. Music is as much of your essence as it is of mine. Our stories may have shaped us differently: I may not have developed the warrior side towards being a bad-ass - as you use to say. Nor may you have not developed the domestic docility side, but in essence, our magic has the same origin, our essence has the same substance, our strength will always show itself – on its own style - when necessary."

“I agree with you, I also feel this connection with Music, even though I have not had a formal music education, I feel this force so deeply, like an explosion of feelings. You know, it is really impressive how mysterious this empathy between wish and non-wish versions is. For example, in my turn, I understand and deeply feel the loss of your parents and I know - I feel - that you understand on a deep level the difficulties I had in childhood mainly, to cope with the abandonment of my parents, unaware that through Music in my heart I was always connected to them. This degree of empathy doesn't just happen between us, look at our husbands, or even see how my parents feel connected to you and, I believe, to their deceased wish counterparts. This is an incredible mesh of love and union entwined after an evil wish of Split Regina - it’s really incredible..."

"Yes, it is a Mystery, one more in the Book of Mysteries: Split Regina... Back in Hearty Island, I used to hate her. I’m not very proud of that feeling, but it is the truth, I simply could not accept what she did. But… ironically, it was this wish, driven by dark feelings, that originated, in a distant past spread to the present, the duplication of worlds thus creating the wish and non-wish versions. She changed our lives with only one wish against you – and me. And then, I also hated the Good Queen because of her cruel method to bring your memories back – at least that’s how I used to think based on what I had watched. You know the story, thanks to the gods’ intervention, who kept me in touch with my parents’ souls, I could finally understand, accept, and forgive her. And thanks to all of that, Key and I could find each other, could live on its plenitude our true love. And then… there is also Wish Regina, the Evil Queen I grew up fearing and hearing about, now a reformed sorcerer in charge of the Social Assistance Ministry of the United Realms. Too many turns and plot twists with too many Reginas, don’t you think?” she asks playfully while watching Luna in Hope’s lap, both surrounded by a watchful Missy.

“Too many, I agree. I have had my own dose of struggle to deal with them, that is, rigorously speaking, with the first two of them, but I also have learned to cope, to accept and to forgive them… About their names, Killian told me that Captain Nemo suggested a numbering system to simplify their identification but they are still reluctant to accept that. Particularly, I think this may be a good ID system. Differently from the multiple wish/non-wish people, who come in pairs, in their case there are 3 of them!!" Emma chuckles.

Thoughtfully, Emm caresses her belly, "yeah, coming in pairs..."

“Confirmed then?” Emma asks tenderly.

"Twins, indeed…" Emm nods. “We have to concede this one more credit to our little Pythoness’ account!”

“Yeah…” sighs little Prophetic Priestess’ mother, “get ready for a daily renewed surprise brought by your little products of squared True Love! Wait for squared surprises, in your case!” Emma grins reticently, noting in awe the tiny points of light Hope is creating in the air to entertain Luna and Missy, and then completes her question: “How are you feeling about that? How are you and Key dealing with the idea?”

“I’m feeling truly happy and scared at the same time. You see, it is intense in two extremes: extremely amazing but also really scary given the present uncertain context and then… things are changing so quickly that Killian and I… oh, rephrasing, Key and I, had no option rather than adjust ourselves really fast to the news. Perhaps, if the circumstances were different we would have more time to freak out about the prospect of being parents of twins. But given the scenario, we both went into ‘protecting offspring at any cost’ mode and then we calibrated our momentum in that direction.”

…

As the afternoon falls and the sisters’ conversation continues, Hope and the two pets eventually join them for a snack. Emm mentions that she and Key were positively surprised and became very fond of Dr. Stephen Maturin, not only because of their personal rapport with him but, also, for his patience to explain in details all medical procedures they will follow along the pregnancy. She confesses that, despite having had a good preparation about the modern world, it was not enough to provide all the knowledge related to what she would deal with. In this sense, Dr. Maturin’s empathy is natural since he experienced the same learning stages when he came from the Land of Untold Stories less than 10 years ago. In terms of adaptation, strictly speaking, Dr. Whale's entire medical team has been updating their skills because the 21st century medicine was recently introduced to them with the arrival of those who lived in Hyperion Heights.

…

“Mommy, why Daddy and Uncle Key did not come for a snack with us yet? They are hungry too and I miss them."

"They won't be long, Sweetie, first they had to meet with Grandpa David. They learned that two other kids of Storybrooke also had sad visions that same day you had a sad vision and, as it happened with you, they didn't like it at all."

"Aye, I did not like it, Mommy, too scary... Want to know why?"

“I do, only if you want to talk about it, Honey. If you are okay with that, tell Mommy and Aunt Emm, please, why nobody liked the vision…”

“Because.... it was dark, it had a green river... Hmmn, what more… it had other colored rivers… it had Mommy, Daddy, Hope, Uncle Key, Aunt Emm, Belly Babies, everyone and… all scared… and it had empty bodies and empty souls. Luna and Missy saw everything too, they told me what ‘body and soul’ is; I did not know before, but now I do.”

Exchanging glances with Emma and changing the subject of the conversation, Emm intervenes: "Speaking of emptiness, I'm seeing two empty bowls and one empty glass of juice, so... Who will want more rations with water and more juice with chocolate cake? Raise your hand, who has a hand, and wag the tail, who has a tail!!”

…

In the late afternoon, Killian and Key arrived and joined them at the snack table. Hope asked to bathe in Aunt Emm's tub and is now in the bathroom playing the game of ‘sailing the pirate ship’ while the two couples continue to talk. Emma comments about the girl's revelations and the brothers, in turn, tell them that Storybrooke's other two children also spoke about the world of the dead. Gradually the pieces of a huge puzzle begin to fall into place and some shapes and contours begin to unfold. In this way they already know that there is indeed a threat coming from the Underworld.

Embracing Key, head resting on his shoulders, Emm mutters under her breath: “It would be so good if my parents could talk to us now, as it happened on Hearty Island through the magic mirror...” Turning to Emma and Killian she explains: “even though it has been installed on the mezzanine next to the same musical instruments as before, the mirror never turned into a magic screen again. Maybe it was the case of going upstairs tonight and trying to contact them; I could sit at the piano, meditate, concentrate and then, if I am fortunate to be inspired, play a heart-dictated song… I really wish I could talk to them again, if only the gods gave them permission...”

Elysium, Islands of the Blessed, Wish White-Nolan’s home

Sitting on the lakefront pergola at Wish Charmings' home, Rumple, Belle, W. Snow and W. David silently watch the parade of images reflected by the calm water mirror. As if watching the scene, the whole landscape of the garden - birds, leaves of the trees, flower bushes… everything is quietly still. The only movement comes from the black and white images transmitted by the retinas of Luna and Missy in their dreamy state on Earth.

"Fascinating and disturbing," Rumple breaks the silence to comment. "So .... Every time Luna and Missy sleep on Earth they broadcast images, like journalists reporting to you the latest news?"

"Not always," Snow replies. "In general, they do not communicate at all, that is, if there is no transmission, we infer that there are no problems and we are released to our eternal rest in peace, even though there are times that they dream happy dreams and we can watch our Emma with the other Snow and David, or with her twin sister, their respective husbands, and Hope. Luna and Missy simply love the sweet little girl, a special child indeed, as far as we could observe..." she sighs, turning to the lake, worried with the sequence of projected images showing the scary visions shared by Luna, Missy, Hope and the other seer children.

"I have one question. Well, actually, I have several questions, but I will start with this one," Belle chuckles trying to lighten up their mood before continuing, "exactly, do you know who Luna and Missy are?"

David shrugs before saying, "to such a straightforward question, Belle, an equally straightforward answer: exactly, we don't know. Now, by inference, we know that they are beings of Light most likely sent by the gods to the Heart-shaped Island as a company to our daughter, to look after her. I believe the time will come when we will know the exact answer to your question but until then, the inaccuracies and doubts are many..."

Snapping her fingers, as if remembering useful information, Snow goes on. "We also have a mirror in our living room that has functioned as a magical screen transmitting colorful images from Earth; actually, it used to function as a screen when Emma was in the Heart-shaped Island, it never worked that way since Emma moved to Storybrooke," Snow remembers. "It was through this mirror that we were able to talk to her, you must remember when we told you the story."

"Yeah, we do remember," Belle confirms, "… and now that you mentioned it, you see, there is a mirror in our living room as well, but it has never worked as a window between worlds. So far it has been just a mirror..."

"We should confess something," Rumple interrupts Belle. "It’s about what brought us here. It all started with a philosophical talk about rules of incarnation, a curiosity that led us to wanting to talk to the gods about the subject and that, by its turn, ended up on us missing our son and triggering our memory about the story of your communication with your daughter. We know that it happened thanks to a divine intervention so, because of this sequence or reasoning, we decided to visit you. What happened during our teleportation to your house, on the light of these transmitted images, adds more relevance to the case: Belle felt an inexplicable concern, an intuition about a metaphoric storm getting close to Gideon, which should be enough to increase our initial need to meet the gods. Now, seeing these premonitory images clearly indicating a real threat originating from the Underworld hovering over the Earth – I assure you that the need has just become an urgency."

“Well, what I can tell you is that they found us…” David explains, thoughtfully searching his own words for clues on how they should act in the present situation. “To be precise, the gods found us. Actually, Zeus found us; he came to us and told about an intense outburst, from our Emma, addressed to the Sea gods from the sands of the Island. He said it was a completely justifiable outburst that deeply touched them to the point where he came to meet us in our house and allowed us to talk to her. The rest is history but I have no idea how we could try to contact the gods...”

“There is no need, they have already contacted us…” says a voice coming from the backyard, approaching the group. They all turn to the voice direction and meet a smiling Merlin, accompanied by his loyal Apprentice, Jack.

…

After everyone exchanged greetings, Merlin revealed the reason for his and Jack’s visit. He told them that Jack was meditating in the tower, where they live, when a mirror on the wall began to display the image of a cocoon opening and morphing into a transparent-winged butterfly. Almost in a trance, he called Merlin and they both witnessed the butterfly turning into a woman of extraordinary beauty.

She introduced herself as Psyche, the goddess of the Soul and the wife of Eros, the god of Love, and told them that she was, once, a mortal princess that became immortal because she drank the gods’ nectar of ambrosia. She then explained to Merlin that the origin of his full name, Merlin Ambrosius, dates back to the desert oasis where he was born. The first trees whose fruits came to be known as ambrosia were original from that oasis although, initially, they had no magical property. Only later, when planted in the orchards of Mount Olympus and irrigated with waters of the Holy Fountains, did the fruits acquire special properties, among them to confer immortality on those who drank the nectar produced from them. Psyche then reveals to Merlin that it was this nectar, drank in the Holy Grail, which made him an immortal Wizard. Or rather quasi-immortal, since immortality is not synonymous with invulnerability - and Merlin, better than anyone, knows this Truth.

"And why did you come to me to reveal this story?" Merlin asked.

"Because the Ambrosia trees from the Olympus Orchard are drying up, as well as the waters of the Holy Fountains. Some gods - my husband included, believe that the source of the problem lies in the Underworld Rivers, and we will need the help of the Elysium souls as well as some souls in the Underworld, under the command of Persephone, to locate and neutralize this source. If the problem spreads, everyone may be affected, especially the mortals, on Earth."

…

The visitors are already gone and W. David and W. Snow are now in their living room. Sit in front of the mirror - functioning again as a magic screen, they watch their daughter playing a piano piece she has dedicated to them. The harmonious notes cross the spaces until pulsating in sync with the two monarchs’ ethereal hearts and, although not seen by her, they feel that she feels their presence. Resigning themselves to what they are allowed, the two send to their  Emma - and to the two little points of light shining in her womb - the blessings of their eternal love.

“And they say rest in peace for all eternity…” David mutters.

“Yeah,” Snow chuckles, “they never mention the stormy weather in between two lulls.”

“What can we do, Snow? Psyche didn't explain much beyond what she briefly told Merlin. According to him, she only warned that we will be – her words – ‘activated’ when the right time comes. Until then ... what can we do, Snow?"

"We can listen to the music our daughter is dedicating to us, David; we can send our beloved ones all our best energy. We can keep in tune with the other Snow and David. In practice, they are our representatives on Earth and worship our daughter as their own. In addition to looking after our loved ones, we can keep the flame of Hope alight - theirs and ours...”

On Earth, sensing the presence of her parents, Emma raises her head and looks at the mirror. In a flash, she sees their smiling faces mouthing ‘I love you’ while their image dissipates.

Enchanted Countryside, White-Nolan’s home

“Neal!”

From the porch of the ranch headquarters Snow shouts for her son, whom she hasn't seen since early in the morning, at the breakfast table.

Looking around, she sighs. The Charming Farm is the fulfillment of an old dream of David combined with more room for the vibrant energy of a preteen practicing light magic and within easy reach for Snow on her way to work. They were well adapted to the routine of a country life close to an urban life but since David accepted Regina's invitation to the Ministry of Defense the farm has not been so carefully taken care of. Snow would not say it has been neglected; on the contrary, it would not be fair to belittle Anton's good work as a farm administrator, but the lack of David's almost magical touches everywhere - in the stable, in the pastures, in the corral - is remarkable. Exception, of course, for the magic bean plantation, always over zealously cared for by Anton. Although magic beans are no longer needed to open portals between realms, as they are now unified into the same time-space dimension, the delicious feijoada prepared with them by Snow for special occasions, an adaptation of the classic Brazilian feijoada - became famous. In fact, its fame crossed the borders of Storybrooke and for the Summer School closing dinner, in Camelot, in response to everyone's insistent requests, she prepared a cauldron of feijoada that deserved the highest praise. The ceremony just couldn't be as triumphant and joyful as Snow would have liked because of the worrying news that began to come from various parts of the United Realms…

PUFFF!!!!

Lost in thought, Snow jumps in fright at Neal's sudden appearance on the porch, surrounded by a pale blue cloud.

“Did you call, mom?”

“Neal, how many times do I have to ask you not to scare me like this? Yes, I called you, my boy. Although we are discussing in the Ministry about setting up a school recess while dealing with the current crisis, classes have not yet been suspended. Are you ready to go?”

“I do but… look, there comes Dad; he seems in a hurry - as always, recently.”

“Snow! I just got a call from Killian warning that Nemo is about to land on the northeast coast. He reported an anomaly in the Enchanted Sea on the same day as the premonitions. It seems that, with the exception of humans and humanoids, all other inhabitants of the oceans exhibited, during a few hours, a completely chaotic behavior as if in a collective trance, an underwater hysteria that only ended with Poseidon's intervention - neither Triton nor Ursula could contain the sea fauna fury - the seas have been very rough, it seems. If that happened with the creatures of the Ocean, now I’m worried about the inland creatures. I’ll call W. Robin, Merida and Kristoff asking for a report on the Enchanted Forest, the Enchanted Highlands’ and the Enchanted Mountains’ wildlife; maybe it’s the case for increasing the vigilance in these areas to protect the animals.”  

“Dad, you are thinking Wish Cruella may be behind all of it, isn’t it?

“Yeah… I'm suspecting she may be behind the erratic behavior of the sea creatures, indeed.”

“Then, Dad, I'm telling you what I am thinking. I think I should work on the protection spell that Gideon taught me so that Wilby won't be left defenseless. And I think we should leave him indoors, is that okay?”

“Agree about protecting Wilby, good idea, son. If you feel safe preparing the magic, go ahead, maybe we should ask Anton to help you in extending the spell to the other animals. Do you think you can manage that? You will be late today for school but it will be worth.”

“Sure Dad, be back in a minute!!” Neal answers already puffing himself into the house to get the ingredients he will need.

“David,” Snow says, “I do not want to increase the overall worry or to generate another panic wave but, is that a case to sanction a general school break?”

“Maybe, but we’ll have to talk to Regina and some ministers first. We will deal with that in Storybrooke, after Neal works in the protection spell, okay?”

…

On their way to Storybrooke, Snow and David talk about what they are working with and what they would love to do. David knows he is much needed in the present crisis but he wishes he could go back to his farm activities, he misses the country life. Snow is happy in her dreamy work, being able to promote a real revolution on Education…. They keep talking and end up commenting on the good partnership the two Killians are developing at Storybrooke’s PD, despite Emma’s temporary license, and that reminds them how the two Emmas are becoming as close as two close sisters. To be quite honest, they have to admit that not only the two Emmas are tightening their emotional bond, they feel that the ‘girls’ are more and more becoming their very dear twin daughters...

“David, because of the fuzz yesterday night caused by Hope’s description of her vision, I forgot to mention that Emm had called me earlier with good news: they are indeed having twins!”

“That’s great news, Honey,” David smiles at his wife and sighs, “at least one really, really good news.”

“Yeah… two more babies for us to love,” Snow completes, looking at the countryside landscape through the car window.

“Mom,” Neal cut them from the back seat, “isn’t that Zelena’s farmhouse entrance? Look, there is a car getting into there!”

“It’s Robyn’s,” David explains, “she and Alice are temporarily living there while deciding where to move for good, to finally settle down – I guess they are tired of being on the roads. They have traveled a lot in the Land without Magic since they got married.”

“Oh, that reminds me of another novelty, Charming. Did you know that Zelena and Chad are our neighbors now, I mean, sort of?” Snow asks.

“Really? How come? What about Chad, doesn’t he have relatives that will want to visit him?” David asks, impersonating his Defense Minister mode.

“Split-Regina didn’t enter into little details, we talked just a bit, while waiting for Neal and Coralline at the school door, but what I know is that Zelena and Chad moved to Portland, Maine, a couple of weeks ago. It seems that he got a transfer to the East Coast in a scheme that appears to be safe, David, no need to worry. Living in Portland will allow Chad’s relatives - as well as the couple’s friends from San Francisco - to visit them without any suspicion. Regina told me that their house is near Storybrooke’s town line, it looks like Zelena has created an amulet for Chad so that he may cross it whenever he needs regardless of whether she is with him, so they both have free access to the United Realms."

“This is so cool…” Neal smiles dreamily, “I would love to have a strategic base for horseback ridings and explorations outside the Realms…”

“You can get your little horse out of the rain for now, young man. As long as the current crisis is not abated, the only strategic base you are allowed to have is our home, next to your parents," David warns him playfully..

Portland, Maine, Zelena and Chad’s new home

“You were right, the view from the room at the tower top is really beautiful, Zelena: a panoramic view of the city and the sea. A view of Paradise, with this blue sky; and I can imagine how incredible it might be during starry nights, I’m sure they will love it!”

“I agree, it’s perfect for them. It’s not a hexagonal room with a balcony, like ours on the floor below, but it has the exact breadth of sight they asked for. It was really fortunate that we found this house in such particular coordinates and with such an architecture that satisfies Robyn's poetic request, and I quote:  an architecture that reminds towers but, at the same time, invokes free space, liberation; a tribute not only to Alice's experience of breaking free from her prison in the tower but also my passing ritual of giving up magic in favor of becoming an archer, thus embracing the dream of honoring my father’s memory: a tower symbolizing a springboard for us to fly freely.”

"Poetic… Robyn was quite inspired when specified her dreamy room in our home if we were to buy a house. Listening to this quoted description leave me with no doubt, they will love their towered room. The house is beautiful. To be honest, it’s a bit too much for just the two of us but it’s fitting to be always full of life and visitors. Besides Robyn and Alice, I hope to get more guests occupying our 4 bedroom house,” he turns to Zelena.

"They will come, from the Realms and from the West Coast, I’m sure. I will love to welcome your parents and our friends from San Francisco. This is a fresh start for us, Chad, but it is also continuity. I am happy to be here, near my family and friends from the Realms and, at the same time, to keep the door open for the world we built to ourselves in the Land without Magic."

All of a sudden, interrupting Zelena's words, a feminine voice echoes off the hexagonal tower walls: "the doors of this house are also open to the worlds below and the worlds above, Zelena!"

Petrified by fright, Chad can only move his eyes toward the woman's form materializing before him and his wife. "What the hell!?" he mutters.

"Technically, not necessarily a 'hell', Chad." Smiling, the beautiful woman walks slowly towards the couple and continues, "please, do not be scared, nor fear, I come in peace. Oh! What a bad behavior on my part... I did not knock neither introduce myself. Forgive my bad manners…  So, I ask permission to come in.  I’m Persephone," she bows extending both hands to them, “nice to meet you”.

“Persephone, as in…. the goddess? I mean, Greek Mythology? Really?” he asks incredulously taking one of her hands.

“Says the Wicked Witch’s husband!” Persephone replies with a small chuckle and immediately corrects herself, “actually, ex-Wicked Witch, nowadays, a respectable sorceress. It’s an honor to finally meet you, Zelena.”

“Yeah, sure, ah… permission granted, I guess, and, thanks… my pleasure too, Persephone.” Zelena and Persephone shake hands.  “I’ve wondered so many times about you and your whereabouts, you have no idea. Hades once spoke to me about you. Despite the hardships you couldn't quite solve, he said you were determined and firm…” Zelena returns the compliment and invites her to the living room on the first floor.

…

“You must be curious about my visit," Persephone explains, "it is natural to be so. I'm not planning to go around in circles, because time to lose is something we no longer have, but... I believe it is necessary for me to explain the context of my visit to you. As a start, I think it is important to make it clear that, in the time count, Hades and I broke up for over a thousand years. While in a marital life, our marriage arrangement was described in the literature with reasonable accuracy. I did in fact alternate - and still do - my stay on Earth and Underworld with a periodicity of six months, although the part that associates this alternation with the creation of the seasons has been very romanticized and mythicized. In other words, there are truths and there are myths related to that. Truths refer to the majority of storylines dealing with my relationships in a more personal level, the mythicized part, to the creation of the seasons. You see, I’m not affirming that there is no relation between the cycles of my stay and the seasons; I’m just saying that everything is much more complex and intricate than a metaphoric legend, or myth, describing something that is real but too complex for the rational mind to absorb completely… there are Mysteries and Secrecies that are so named for a reason; for decoding them one needs to combine wisely all sciences, all areas of human knowledge, so to speak...” she smiles reticently.

“But resuming this not so short ‘introduction’, in general Greek myths are about an early world; usually, they explore themes of parental treachery alternating with tales of filial betrayal,  love and loyalty - all the essentials of good plot-lines linking birth and cosmic creation. Seen today, they have become ancient stories and part of the ancient mythological worldview. But, believe me, gods and goddesses, existed then and still exist now. We may be known only for the ancient part of our existence, but we are still ‘around’. This way, to contextualize, Demeter is in fact my mother and Zeus, her brother, is, indeed, my father.  Athena, Aphrodite, Ares, Apollo, Artemis, Dionysus, Hermes, and Hephaestus are indeed my brothers and sisters. And Hestia, Hera, Demeter, Poseidon, Hades and Zeus are, indeed, brothers and sisters…”

“The moral code of your family is, indeed, quite different from ours,” Zelena mutters with high dose of sarcasm.

“Indeed,” Persephone agrees, with a wink, “but you must remember that we are talking about early human civilization. I understand that incest is a taboo now, but it was considered ‘normal’ and most prevalent in families of royal lineage to keep the bloodlines ‘clean and pure’. Non-royalty rarely participated in incest. Maybe that is the origin of all the drama in my family, that and our immortality, but, looking cautiously, even in many religions and traditions of nowadays, the myths of creation start with the narrative of incest…”

“You are right, when we really think about we see that most of them do start this way,” Chad concedes.

“Of course they do. The key is to never be too judgmental and keep in mind all historical and cultural context. We are talking about metaphoric stories explaining complex transcendental science. These stories usually use hyperbolic language to exaggerate some colors, or to emphasize some attributes. Take Hades, for instance. He was not as bad as they usually say, at least until the Olympian Crystal incident.  As the god of death and the Underworld, he suffered a bit from a bad image. He is often treated like the Greek version of devil, but that’s a bit of a stretch. To start, Hades never chose the Underworld as his domain. He and his brothers, Zeus and Poseidon, drew straws to see who would be lord of what realm. Zeus drew the Heavens and the Upper world, Poseidon drew the Seas, and Hades drew the Underworld. As the Underworld rulers go, during the time we were married he was a pretty decent king. When Orpheus descended into the Underworld to retrieve his bride, Hades was moved by his pleas and agreed to let the woman go, on the condition that, when leaving, Orpheus wouldn’t look back. You know, he did, of course, and lost her – but that was not Hade’s fault. Today, when I think about it, I see how Hades started to downgrade into darkness because of that passage, which led him to cut the Ambrosia tree in the Underworld. That used to be the only tree of my garden - in that quadrant - that wasn't dry… But it is important to note that he was not responsible for the condemnation or redemption of souls. Those who died were subject to the judgment of demigods, not Hades. As for me, although he did in fact, tricked me to stay in the Underworld - he kidnapped me - after a deal with my father he became a respectful and good husband. Differently from most gods and goddesses, we were both faithful to each other – and quite possessive, I must confess. There was a time that he fell in love with a nymph and I turned her into a mint plant so that my husband wouldn’t be able to have her as a lover. That is not my most glamorous story, I know, but, as far as a marriage between gods goes, those were good times for us,” she sights reminiscent.

After a pause, while Zelena and Chad exchanged discreet glances but didn’t say a word, Persephone continues. “Anyway, things deteriorated fast between us because of that ancient crystal, shaped like a crude lightning bolt, the Olympian Crystal. Because of an old sibling rivalry, the crystal, which belonged to my father, was stolen by Hades. My father, by his turn, cursed Hades' heart and, since then, Hades changed radically. He could not love, he could not feel. You know the story, Zelena. For us, that's when we parted and he became the cruel, vengeful god without noble feelings. Only you, Zelena, was strong enough – and I admire you for that – to penetrate his petrified heart and break the curse with a true love kiss. You were able to see his remaining good, but even that was not enough to lead him into a redemption path. On the contrary, with his distorted mind he deceived you, he schemed against you and your sister, and he caused suffering and losses. Eventually, he ended up losing his immortality. Not even his soul could be saved and, sadly, disintegrated. The irony is that he ceased to exist because of the illegitimate power he wanted to possess. That was the end of Hades but that was not the end of Evil, and that is the reason of my visit today.”

“Are you implying that you came because you didn’t like me not only killing Hades but also disintegrating his soul and your father’s Crystal? Well, I’m sorry and not sorry at the same time. In my defense, I had no option, he was going to disintegrate my sister in the same way he tried to do with Robin right in front of us. You see, I did love Hades, but not to the point of living with the burden of Regina’s death. At the end of the day, after all struggles, many curses and turns of the world, here I am. I met a man who loves me as much as I love him and we built up a healthy and happy life together. Even Regina, despite not being allowed to live side by side with the love of her life, came out of all that victorious. She was able to save his soul by opening her heart to host his soul; in other words, their love was so strong that they could overcome the soul disintegration power of the Olympian Crystal, did you know that? ” Zelena vents, holding tight to her husband's hand.

“Yes, I did, they were impressively brave. And let’s be clear, I’m not here because of Hades or of what happened to him and the Crystal. As I told you, Hades and I rarely spoke or saw each other for over a thousand year. You see, the Underworld is big enough to ‘accommodate’ its King and its Queen in such a way that I always managed to keep my distance from him, mainly because I didn't approve his evil behavior. Only after his death I went back to where you and your friends have been, that place he called Underbrooke - a section of the Underworld he built to please you. There, I helped Arthur to reorganize the broken kingdom, as Arthur used to call it. Thanks to my intervention, Arthur was able to rescue and to retrieve the essence of some lost souls who had accidentally fallen or been thrown into the Lost Souls river before being judged and without deserving such a sad fate. Actually, to be extremely honest, my coming here is indirectly connected with Hades. Going straight to the point, I came because of Hades’ legacy, the evilness he planted in a land that cannot be called fertile unless the sowing is dry, hard, and… cruel. For Evil, the ground is fertile, and that is what Hades sowed. Unfortunately, it seems, the harvest has just began. In fact, the process started a few months ago, a period of great light and love for people from the United Realms thanks to the harmonious waves of the Sweet Suite. Meanwhile, the counterpart was being unfolded downstairs, so to speak, as reported to me by Arthur, when he noticed the first anomalies in the smoke coming from Tartarus.”

“Anomalies?” Chad, increasingly frightened and uncomfortable, interrupts to ask. “What kind of anomalies do you refer to? Could you be more specific?”

“Of course,” Persephone concedes, “I’ll get there. Continuing, I was talking about Arthur. Although he and I have taken every precaution in our bailouts, some lost souls not supposed to get free and to recover their evil ego managed to escape without our help, probably they were helped by the one who took over the Underbrooke’s City Hall and became a stumbling block in Arthur's path: Cruella Deville. Apparently obsessed with the idea of returning to Earth and taking revenge on Emma Swan, who killed her to save her son's life, after freeing some lost souls Cruella stole from the library of Hades one of the ‘Mysteries & Secrecies’ books accessible only to the gods and a few humans who get permission – in this case, granted by me to Arthur."

Taking a sip of tea, Persephone inhales and exhales deeply before continuing. "Here, a parenthesis is needed, since you and others have already been in the Underworld and may wonder about what I'm about to reveal. Despite having similar buildings, as you must know Storybrooke and Underbrooke do not share exactly the same layout - quite the contrary, actually. Particularly, downstairs, the public library - where Wish Belle, a soul with unfinished business, works - is adjacent to Hades's forbidden sector. Belle isn't allowed to get in there but she has been given permission to borrow some books from there. To read and decipher their ancient texts she uses a magical translator, a gift of mine, an appreciation for her good behavior and impressive achievements as a researcher. Now, closing the parenthesis and going back on track, Arthur and I found out that Cruella not only had stolen Belle's translator but had also broken the magic lock to the forbidden library. We managed to prevent her from stealing all banned books but one of them she hid and, especially with the help of two other souls, Pan, whom she rescued from the river of Lost Souls, and Wish Rumple, she managed to read - and learn - the content of a very specific Mystery & Secrecy tome: ‘How to clone human bodies’.”

“Is that a Mystery, or a Secrecy, really?” Zelena interrupts Persephone with a nervous chuckle. “I mean, not that I don’t believe the seriousness of what you are telling us, but I’ve seen so many wish and non-wished versions of people, or split versions, of whatever that it’s really doubtful this is such a mysterious secret…”

“There's a big difference between what you have seen and what I’m referring to: you have seen body-and-soul alternate versions of people, duplication even triplication of people in a so-called quantum process of magic involving the concept of infinite possibilities. I am referring to cloned bodies, you can think about them as empty bodies, ready to host deceased souls in a process that does not involve reincarnation as we know it. It does not involve a restart, a reset with forgetfulness and detachment of the past life, with the loss of ego for starting all over again aiming at a spiritual evolution. In short, their plan is to clone bodies – your bodies, before killing you so that in a fraction of seconds they will magically switch places with your souls which will force your souls to descend to the Underworld. This way, by taking  your place, they will enter your clones. They also plan to clone all gods’ bodies, after drying our source of immortality. The process of this kind of cloning involves a hibernation state of the cloned body until the new soul enters the empty ‘vehicle’.”

“Bloody hell…” Chad interjects.

“You have no idea how bloody this hell is,” Persephone acquiesces. “The anomalies refer, as I said, to a kind of smoke that may change Nature's behavior across all kingdoms - including the Underworld. They precede, as an alarm, the main and final cloning magic, which involves the use of a special fruit cultivated in the Olympus associated with water from a special fountain there. With them we have indications that our enemies are on their way, unfortunately. Although we managed to send Pan, Cruella, Gaston and James Nolan to Tartarus, attempting to avoid the problem, now we think that sending them may have increased the likelihood that it will occur. Wish Rumple hasn’t been judged yet and remains in Underbrooke, Arthur and I will see what we will do with him, but I guess sending him to Tartarus will not be a good idea…”

After a prolonged silence, during which Zelena and Chad processed the huge amount of information, Persephone concludes: “There are some facts that we don’t know yet, for example, it seems that they have a connection on the Upperworld, some sort of help coming from the United Realms, and we really fear that, led by Pan and Cruella’s souls, the condemned souls may be plotting from Tartarus. As I said, there are lots of things we still don’t know but we do know that the situation goes beyond what our power alone can handle. We need you, humans from Earth and souls from Elysium, to help us. There is a major disaster with proportions that I would not like to think about being forged and we need to prevent that. So, there you have it, the reason of this unexpected visit of mine. I came to ask for your help.”

Enchanted Seashore, Wish Regina and Roland’s home

“Roland, where have you been? After my sister Queen announced, this morning, the suspension of classes, I didn't see you anymore; I was starting to worry and thinking about using a location spell...  I waited but you took so long that I decided to have lunch first. Now… let's go to the kitchen, my dear, to warm up your food.” Wish Regina tells the 15-year-old as he begins to climb the back porch staircase.

"No need for worry, Gina, I won’t go too far from here, promise. I was in my other room, at the tree house and didn’t hear you calling because I was chatting with Lucy, Neal and Coralline. Neal and Aline are staying at Lucy's house while their parents are in a meeting with the Queen and the others, at the City Hall."

"I see…  Well, as you know, I attended this meeting via Web, as well as a few other ministers who did not travel to Storybrooke, but in my case I only needed to be present for 2 hours. We decided that, at the moment, the activities of my Social Assistance Ministry will remain in a standby mode, waiting for more information regarding the mysteries behind the children visions and the ocean ‘turbulence’. By the way, one of the absent ministers, Nemo, warned us that he is about to land near our house and I have, since then, been waiting for the Nautilus, cooking a few dishes, a couple of apple pies… I guess they shouldn't be long. Now, about you: seriously? 6 hours of chat?" she asks playfully. “Thankfully, the power consumption of the equipment developed by Nemo and the Dragon is 100% self-sustainable, otherwise people with magic in all United Realms, working in sync, would not be able to energize all transponders that the young people use!" she quips.

“I see no problem in talking too much. Adults can spend a whole day in conversations and meetings – which is accepted as normal. What about us? This is our world too, what happens now affects our future. The current crisis seems to be so serious that the four of us needed to get together to discuss our positions, nothing that won’t be coordinated with what you will decide, don’t worry. Adults are in charge - and we know that, but we needed to align our claims and we can help. Neal and Coralline have magic, Lucy is a True Believer and I am a champion Archer, not to mention our cunning intelligence! And do not forget:  as the senior of the group, I’m kind of their leader!” Roland responds proudly, already devouring a heated lasagna.

“We will see about that, young ‘senior’…" Regina’s reply would be longer but, fortunately for Roland, the conversation was interrupted by the arrival of Nemo, Liam Jr, Wish Brennan and Liam Senior, together with Ursula and W. Ariel, who traveled swimming by the Nautilus' side, “just for the fun of it!”

…

"Like Lieutenants Martin & Harris who, by the way, opted to have lunch and stay nested aboard, those four out there are becoming inseparable couples, if you know what I mean..." Brennan smiles muttering under his breath to be heard only by Liam Senior and Regina, the three sat on the oceanfront balcony. He refers to the couples walking arm in arm along the shore with the excuse of digesting Regina's hearty meal but, in fact, looking for an alone time. That is especially valid - it seems - to Liam Jr and W. Ariel, moving away as if in search of a more private corner.

“You prepared a real feast for us, Regina, everything was delicious,” L. Senior says, between sips of an herbal tea.

“Thanks, Liam. Knowing that six people were coming was an ideal excuse for me to try and forget about the problems. Unfortunately I didn’t have time to prepare anything special, I hope you stay long enough to enjoy something more elaborate. Oh yeah… something that doesn't involve seafood, out of respect for Ursula and W.Ariel. Maybe a cheese soufflé with a good red wine...” she plans dreamily. “You know, cooking for me is a therapy, especially when I'm just like now, really worried. There was a time when I used to vent going to the 'witch's cauldron', instead!!” Regina and L. Senior have a good laugh at that, and she goes on, “but now that my witchcraft times are past, my hobby is cooking, I love to try new recipes, combine new seasonings and condiments ... Sometimes I resent from not having a taste keeper more open to novelties, you know, since Roland is not that much given to spices - especially seafood, I must confess. Well, I love the sea, no wonder I chose to live in front of it taking care, obviously, to find a seaside location close to the Enchanted Forest, which is Roland's natural habitat.”

“Well,” Liam Sr. replies bluntly, “if registration for tasting your cuisine is open, I'll be the first in line to appreciate the Chef's production!”

Rubbing his beard thoughtfully, Brennan interrupts the flirtation to ask about Roland, and Regina goes on to explain how the two eventually got closer, and today share a bond resembling the one between a son and a mother.

…

Approaching the balcony, Ursula, accompanied by Nemo, asks:

"Regina, do you know why we came to your house before going to Storybrooke?"

“No, I don’t. Although I feel much honored by your visit, I must confess that I was curious about it,” Regina replies.

“The reason is simple and complicated at the same time, but I'll try to summarize it,” Ursula explains. “The location of your home is special. In fact, Nemo and I found out that some homes in the United Realms are very specially located. I do not know whether by the architects’ intuition or knowledge of occult sciences, or both, but many houses are located at points of telluric energy chakras and they are very useful as a communication channel for the members of my family. You probably know my family tree from literature – so you might know that I'm the daughter of Poseidon's union with Amphitrite and I'm Triton's sister. You might also know, I imagine, that I have many uncles, aunts, and cousins, including my cousin Persephone, daughter of Zeus and Demeter. So… yesterday, Persephone telepathically contacted me to let me know that she was going to visit your half-sister, Zelena, at her new home in Maine. Although it is located outside the borders of the United Realms, Zelena chose a house positioned at one of these energetic crossing points to which I referred, and that opened Persephone's passage to the Earth plane coming from the Underworld. I don't know exactly the subject of their talk, but I do know that my cousin asked me to be at one of these energy points because she needed to talk to me too - with urgency - and the conversation would be lengthy, thus more complicated to sustain, via telepathy, if I were outside of them. In face of that, Nemo and I searched in his maps to locate the nearest point in relation to where we were – in other words, your home was the answer. And this is, my dear friend, the original reason that brought us to your welcoming house. The extra bonus, that is, our great time here and the opportunity to strengthen the emotional ties that bind us, might be a result of one of Cousin Eros’ romps,” Ursula mumbles and Nemo giggles.

“I see, interesting…” Regina replies, pensive. “Well, while Persephone doesn’t contact you, I invite the two of you to join us in our tea time and, then, if possible, I would like to know more about these energy lines and points, that is, if you or Nemo, or both, could teach us about them. If I got the idea roughly right, they may be useful for us to deal with what is coming even though we don’t know yet what it is.”

“I will tell what I can for now,” Nemo addresses the small audience, soon joined by Roland, Liam Jr, and W. Ariel, while Ursula quietly retreats to the living room, “so that Ursula may be free to relax and meditate.  Well… let’s start from a scientific fact: there are straight fault lines in the earth’s tectonic plates, to many people known as ley-lines. It’s also scientifically known that through these cracks the magnetic energies released are very powerful. Our ancestors have known about these lines for thousands of years: each culture on the planet has known about them yet with different names. Native Indians of this same region where we are right now, for example, used to call them spirit lines  because their electro-magnetic energy helped their Shamans to contact the spirits. The druids called them  mystical lines. In Wales, as in eastern countries, they were called dragon lines. For the aboriginal people of Australia these lines were known as dream lines. Throughout history all megalithic structures have been strategically built on top of these so called ley lines. These electro-magnetic lines may be seen as veins that receive energy from the sun, thus connecting and affecting every living thing on this planet. The atoms of our bodies, because they are surrounded by electrons, are connected to the earth’s electro-magnetic fields and our heart, as a battery, may be charged by them. Right now, Ursula is in the living room, meditating on one of these crossing points, or megalithic centers, to elevate her electrical aura, intellect, and connection to her higher self, which will activate her energy centers (or chakras).”

“Wow...” Roland exclaims softly.

“Of course there are dark forces that are knowledgeable of these lines and concentrate effort to manipulate these fields and to control or influence the geo-electrical grid. For this reason the access to this knowledge is not allowed to every mortal and few cultures have it completely mapped - the maps in my possession are a rare treasure, among the few out there with the complete grid involving all alternate and superimposed realms – such as the United Realms, which is superimposed to Maine, the Upper world, the Underworld and the Olympus. Around the world, multiple alternate realms, aligned to multiple cultures and traditions, are superimposed, which explains how Henry Mills, our Author, ended up in a realm with another Rapunzel, another Cinderella – which is made possible due to a magic quantum process of infinite possibilities.”

“I have a question, Sir!” Roland raises his hand.

“Go ahead, young man,” Nemo replies in a benevolent tone.

“How is it possible to converge, to the same time and space, characters and stories, known through literature for hundreds of years, which were, according to their origins, mismatched in time and in space? And how come that they all speak the same language - English, in our case?"

"Wow, I'm positively impressed with the complexity of your question... what's your name again, my boy?"

"Roland, sir."

"Very well. So, Roland, the ley lines - which I usually refer to as Earth’s meridians of energy, in an analogy with the millennial Chinese medicine, allow connections that mix time and space and activate, on those that are transported through them, the necessary adjustment of language skill and, sometimes, cultural adaptation. In other words, they equalize the inner communication channel of the person crossing a portal. This means that you need portals, like those opened by magic beans, like the ones I used to open, for the Nautilus, with kraken blood fuel - thanks to Ursula, this is a method I no longer use - or any other magical means to open portals between realms and dimensions. They translate different temporal and spatial planes to converge into the same plane. Before you ask – yeah, I’m seeing your eyes shining while your mind is processing the information - let me tell you one thing. Time travel in the same realm is far more complicated than that between planes of different realms and often requires dark magic. So, back to the convergence of characters originated from different times in History into a common space-time, you’ve got to remember that they are characters like all of us, right here and right now. We obviously know that these characters and stories are absolutely real – we are real!" Everyone laughs at that, before Nemo resumes, "the fact that we are known in the Land without Magic literature is also explained by the Earth’s meridian theory: during their dreams, writers, supposed to be our creators, travel through the dream lines and visit our original and very much real realms, they get to know real people that they turn into fiction characters, and by doing it the way they do, they frequently translate their dreams into mixed distortions of our real stories, you know the rest. In summary…” he sighs and pauses for a little while, “there you have it. Are you happy with my answer, Roland? "

"Very, Sir, thank you very much," the boy responds with a distant, dreamy look, sailing the waves of imagination fueled by Nemo's response.

Concluding his explanation, Nemo takes another sip of his tea and finally states, “to conclude, the Grid, with capital letter - that is how I call my maps, establishes higher levels of consciousness in a scale of 7 keys, but this is something to talk about in another day. Let’s hope Ursula will help us in understanding what is going on in our present situation and, also, in knowing what we should do to prevent chaos or to fight potential enemies.”

Underworld, Underbrooke

The air is dry, reddened by the pollution caused by a high dose of toxic gas spewing from chimneys spread along the sidewalks. However, for those who inhabit the decaying town, the existence of the permanent anomaly does not affect them yet: they do not properly breathe with lungs; though through their semi-densified souls, molded in the shape of the body they had on earth, runs a viscous liquid which - under the effect of torture, in Hades' time, gushed and bled.

The streets are empty; most of Underbrooke’s inhabitants are gathered in an assembly promoted by Arthur and Persephone, at the City Hall. The subject of the meeting may be or may be not new to everyone except for the two beings walking down Main Street: Wish Belle and Wish Rumple discussing and, in vain, trying to seek an understanding, a convergence of viewpoints.

…

"Rumple, no matter how hard you try to justify it, the fact is that you lied about not acting dominated by your Dark One persona. Dark Ones trick, Dark Ones lie! When Baelfire came back from Neverland, you tricked him and lied to me!"

Tousling his hair with his hands in exasperation, Rumple continues to argue. "Belle, we were a happy family until Regina killed Baelfire and you. We lived years of peace, harmony and love. What difference does a harmless lie make?"

"Harmless? Really? It's the cornerstone of everything that went wrong later, Rumple. It's the first domino, the first lie followed by a string of more lies. It means that all our happiness was grounded in lies. Our harmony was false, and I no longer know if your love was false too. Your love of power has corrupted your noblest feelings, Rumple.”

“How dare you?! Of course I loved you! I love you. Everything I did was because I loved you and Bael more than anything!” Rumple cuts her.

“Rumple, you know that I've always been able to see beyond the Beast, to see your primary light source despite your Dark One persona. The fact that you can't understand a truth as basic as this: our happiness was built on a lie, makes me wonder. It makes me think that you continue, even after you are dead, trying to delude yourself and, as a byproduct, to fool me too!"

"I lost everything Belle, I lost you, I lost my son, differently from the other Rumple I was left with nothing. My only option was to give up. I know I am worse now than I was when you died but ... I had no choice but to surrender to darkness. I lost Hope."

"Don't you see the pattern? Everything and everyone to blame but you! You're victimizing yourself again and we're going around in circles. I know it got harder for you after Bael and I died. But it was hard for me too! After dying we arrived here but he quickly moved on to the Islands of the Blessed. Meanwhile, with this hellish unresolved business called Rumplestiltskin, I've been here for almost 12 years now, always in a library, reading, studying the human psyche, and waiting for my unresolved, unfinished business to come in. Then you arrived, a soul completely darkened but … still, I still hoped, I still do, Rumple. I have not given up on you or on us. I wait because I'm your Hope. Can't you see, Rumple? You haven't lost Hope."

“Nah… you are the one not seeing, Belle. I know that I had lied to you and to Bael but I had good reasons. I did that so that I would be able to trick Regina and Hook by making them believe that she would cast the dark curse and he would follow me in a world where I would be vulnerable. I made them believe that I needed to go the Land without Magic to find my son when, in reality, I had already found him and we were secretly living in peace. All I wanted was Hook to cross the realms and be trapped there, staying there for the rest of his life. And why should I care in betraying Regina? She was Evil, she was a villain. So, I plotted with the fairies to capture her and to steal her magic – in one way or another, the result would be positive: the Enchanted Forest would get rid of two villains. What happened was not exactly what I envisioned, but it worked well, for a while at least. Hook moved to the other Enchanted Forest, to raise his daughter, and we neutralized the Evil Queen’s power - all realms benefited from that. I was convinced, and still am, that the end justifies the means - and the end was noble: to live in peace with you and my son, being a family of nobles with noble attitudes: charitable, generous, fair … Bael became a knight and married a Princess! We lived a happy life, we did!”

“Until we did not,” Belle sighs, and continues, “I don’t know what else I could do or say to make you see, Rumple. I don't know how far you still have in your soul traces of the connection with the Dark Ones lineage, or if it's all just you. I do not know how far you have not understood that lying is like non-consensual, abusive, sex; it is the absence of resonance, of transparency, of respect. There is no nobility where there is a lie. Nobility is, above all, a state of honesty, of sincerity. I’m not saying you did no good to a lot of people, I’m saying you did no good to yourself, mainly. Once I read a text, written by a man called Carl Gustav Jung, in his ‘Memories, Dreams and Reflections’, stating something like: You may feed the hungry, you may forgive an insult, and you may love your enemy…these are undoubtedly great virtues… But what if you should discover that the poorest of beggar and the most impudent of offenders are all within you, and that you stand in need of your own kindness; that you are the enemy who must be loved? What then?”

“Are you implying that I should love myself? Well, dearie, that would be the opposite of what you have always said when you accused me of being selfish, don’t you think?”

“Absolutely not, these are two different things and there you are again, trying to locate a loophole in my reasoning. I’m saying that you are your own enemy. Don’t trick me with your word playing, Rumple. You know what I meant. We are both too old and too dead for this kind of game.”

“One more reason for us to go back to Earth, to inhabit healthier and younger bodies, Belle...”

“Please, Rumple, not this nonsense again. I asked Arthur to come for a walk because he knows how and why I know the news he and Persephone are, right now, communicating to everyone and trying to find out who else, besides you, is behind the plan. He knows I’m aware of you being behind the sad news…”

“I still don’t see the sad aspect of it. You are neglecting a unique opportunity to keep your memories as Belle intact and be given the experience of a new life without repeating the same mistakes of the previous life. Look at my dark soul, I could evolve towards the light, don’t you see? I would be able to learn what still needs to be taught to me. Just imagine, you and I together, no dark magic this time, no magic at all, no tricks, and no lies: a new beginning – a reincarnation without forgetfulness. The prospect is fabulous: a new life in young bodies ready to express physically the pleasures of loving and being loved. Would you do that, Belle? For us, would you build with me a new life? Would you go back with me, if you knew that the cloning plan would work as it is supposed to work?”

Sighing, despite not breathing, just out of habit, Belle responds. “I love you, Rumple, I honestly do, I know – I sense – that underneath your darkness there are resilient seeds of goodness. But I could never go ahead with you in this craziness. And … you know what? I’m so tired; I need to evolve, I need to rest in peace.” Slowly, head down, Belle walks away from him, leaving Rumple completely alone.

…

"Fate behaves irrationally, and the energy of life inconveniently demands a gradient agreeable to itself; otherwise it simple gets dammed up and turns destructive. It regresses to former situations. […] Psychic energy is a very fastidious thing which insists on fulfillment of its own conditions. However much energy may be present, we cannot make it serviceable until we have succeeded in finding the right gradient. […] Life can flow forward only along the path of the gradient. But there is no energy unless there is a tension of opposites; hence it is necessary to discover the opposite to the attitude of the conscious mind. It is interesting to see how this compensation by opposites also plays its part in the historical theories of neurosis. Freud’s theory espoused Eros; Adler’s the will to power. Logically, the opposite of love is hate, and of Eros, Phobos (fear): but psychologically it is the will to power. Where love reigns, there is no will to power; and where the will to power is paramount, love is lacking. The one is but the shadow of the other: the man who adopts the standpoint of Eros finds his compensatory opposite in the will to power, and that of the man who puts the accent on power is Eros. Seen from the one-sided point of view of the conscious attitude, the shadow is an inferior component of the personality and is consequently repressed through intensive resistance. […] The conscious mind is on top, the shadow underneath, and just as high always longs for low and hot for cold, so all consciousness, perhaps without being aware of it, seeks its unconscious opposite, lacking which it is doomed to stagnation, congestion, and ossification. Life is born only of the spark of opposites…" (Carl G. Jung, Two Essays on Analytical Psychology)

*

[neisuinene]

In Your Dreams Tonight - Chapter 6 –Prelude

Prologue 1  Prologue 2 Prologue 3

  Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 7

Do you still remember…that dream?

Do you still remember…me?

The background shows cherry blossoms, when the wind breeze brushes by, it dances with it, with the bright blue sky that is almost dome-like.

The whole view was beautiful and serene, even if it is just an opening screen of the game, the character could feel as if they were actually there. The light scent of the blossoms, the amazing view that is no less than any well-known cherry blossoms viewing sights in Japan. It is all peaceful and quiet, and you, were only one there. Until, these words suddenly appear on the screen, along with the speech that came with it.

?!! Neisui was sitting at her laptop, surprised when the sudden words came out of nowhere, even more so when she heard own voice speaking those words. The helmet has recorded their voice at point of registration, but if they are good enough just to take the voice sample of them and put them into speech inside the game, that is another thing.

What is this game? Why so sad already? She did read the description at opening of the game, just a page before this one, stating that because this game is unique and story would be based on how the players and npcs play it, there would be no opening video of what had happened, that would leave for the players to find out. Instead, it gave a few of samurai quotes that appeared in Samurai Love Ballad game, and some Neisui had no recollection of seeing before. But that did not matter, the game will figure it out somehow.

Until she saw these two quotes, who is that addressed to? Was that really her voice she heard? Yet it sounds so far away and almost out of the world. Was that the player’s voice or she was just imagining that? What happened if the player were a guy, what would he have heard?

But there was no chance for her to think more, for the next lines have already appeared on the screen.

Killing is what I do best. I kill to protect, yet I have lost them both.

Whose line is this? The middle part, she knows Oda Nobunaga has said similar thing, but was that really his line, who are them?

I do not wish us to be enemies or apart, but as a samurai, I must fulfill my duty. Please forget me, and live a peaceful life. If one day I must kill you…

Then the cherry blossoms fade, instead a video showing vast mountains and sea, the castle to prosperous town appears, on the sky it shows another line.

When she and rest of nation stands before you, what will you choose?

Please let us enter this world together, use your hands, use your whole to protect whatever and whoever you wish to protect.

Are you ready to protect your future?

The game has not even yet started, though Neisui is already feeling lots of pressure and mixed emotions of this game. What she just saw, is it the same for every player, or only for those who are wearing special helmets? The GM said they going to a test on her and survey her data. Her move will be examined very closely by them. But what will have they in store for her? Where will she start? But wait, she has not even logged in yet.

Nervously, she entered her account information and logged in, the next screen looks pretty normal, explaining guidelines for every player and even more so if you happened to be a lord or a special character in the game.

Dear Neisui Nene Seta,

By using this helmet you have agreed to our gaming terms of use and conditions. In this game, you will be a daughter of a samurai, we are looking for what will you do with your status and title. Since you are doing this character as a test, we here congratulates you to have a second character of your own choice. This character will have no background, you will be free to make her into whoever you wish her to be. However, just to get you started, please think very carefully of who you gonna be. We will be entering your test character into a hidden story line, what happens there though may not affect your other character directly, but, do think and act carefully.

Please click “NEXT” to enter storyline.

So unlike other players who are only to have one character per helmet and since each helmet is registered, each person could only have one helmet as well. So by having a second character, is impossible. Unless, that person may be the NPC or GM, right? But if the game already told her this character she is forced to play first now is a daughter of the samurai, then what does “think very carefully who you gonna be” means? Isn’t that already decided?

Clicked “NEXT.”

A video starts with images middle-aged samurai being killed, with his hoarse almost shouting voice shouted “AHH!!!” Then the image changed to a woman cried in despair, and a grave of someone stood lonely in the field. Then an image of a young child appeared, crying. The child was so young that he was just a toddler even, with the sadness and fear and anger in his eyes. He had just witnessed his father’s death.

Then an old woman appeared with a tree branch as walking stick. She sighed. “It is fate, what a poor child.”

What was that she just saw? Who was that man, that child, and that old woman? Being killed is nothing new at that era, but did that child really witness his father’s death? How? She could only see someone killed that man, but couldn’t see who did it. If it were happened on the battle field, why did that young child have a chance to witness the scene? Or if he hasn’t, where did that fear in the eyes came from?

The video has ended. Neisui now finds herself, her character wearing a simple white kimono, no, perhaps the word very worn white cloth would be more appropriate to describe her now. Her character is lying in the snow, unconscious. Around her were few bodies of soldiers. The wind is blowing hard in the background, everything else was quiet. Where is she? Is she on the battle field? The woman on the ground, that is…her, right? Then, she heard voices speaking and footsteps, and it gradually became louder.

“General, the war has ended now. We have taken the lady and her young son into the castle, will you see them later?” a man’s voice was speaking.

“Of course,” to Neisui’s surprise, it was a woman who answered. “My dear brother has just lost his life in war and left behind his wife and his young son, there is no one else who can take care of them now. How is she holding up?”

“Barely I suppose. She looks calm now but the tears have yet to dry from her eyes, and young master…he…” the man’s voice stopped, then a pair of feet appeared in Neisui’s view beside her unconscious body. It’s them, the ones that were talking. Neisui’s heartbeat grew faster, what are they gonna do, this kind of anticipation kills her. She for now could only watch as the scene plays in front of her. Her character is still unconscious, yet the tense is near.

“Hmph,” the woman gave a laugh, “looks like we have a company here. What is a youngling doing here? Surely she is not one of them?”

“I don’t suppose so, she looks much to young to be fighting. I mean, by her height, I would say she is no more than a ten-year-old.”

What? Ten-year-old? Her character is that young??? When the GM says they want to see what a daughter of a samurai, perhaps of a dead samurai would do, she never guessed her character they set for her would be this young. Her character’s face is not facing her, and an arm half-blocking, so she couldn’t see nor guess how she would be.

One of them bent down, it was a woman in red armor. She put a finger to Neisui’s character’s nose, then onto her wrist. “She is weak, but still alive. We will take her with us.” Just as Neisui was thinking how kind hearted the woman was, her voice came again, only this time colder, “then we will question her. Friend or foe.”

“But milady, she is only a child!” the other soldier protested.                                                                                                                                                                                

“She may be a child, but don’t you think her appearing on battlefield is just too strange? Or who would be stupid enough to bring their daughter onto battlefield, only to be killed? It is a miracle enough hat she is not dead, but until we can be sure of her identity, or at least where she is coming from, we cannot be at ease.”

“But…”

“I may be a woman, and do not think I would feel sorry if this child has last her parents, just like him.  But what if she is sent by the enemy, to gather our information and leak them out? I am the head of clan, I must protect my people.” Woman stood up, “you take her to the guest room, have a maid and a nurse with her, check if any wounds. Once she is awake, inform me.” The woman walked away, Neisui saw her character is being picked up by the man beside her.

The other man gave a quiet sigh, “what a poor child. Who knows what is in store for you? Now I’m not sure if it were better if you dead or alive. Sometimes death is just so much easier, or sometimes you would wish you were dead.” He picked her up and walked to his horse and rode under the grey sky. The wind is still blowing, and the other only sound left, was the horse that carries them to their destination, wherever that is.

Neisui watched the scene plays in front of her. She could do nothing but watch, and to ponder what will happen next. “What a start,” she sighed.                                                                    

@asktoramatsu @rose-of-yonezawa @nitroforcepower @akanojikan @thesassyscribbler @my-funandgames @shirokazekikagami

[itbcharlie-blog]

A couple of weeks ago I was watching an episode of Fox’s new hit show ‘Star’ that addressed an issue we rarely see on television, let alone prime time. Not long after, ABC’s 20/20 aired a new episode seemingly addressing the same issue. What issue? Gay conversion therapy.

Check out this scene featuring singer Tyrese and transgender actress  Amiyah Scott.

Praying Away The Gay from Charlie R on Vimeo.

What Is Gay Conversion Therapy?

Gay conversion therapy, or “reparative therapy,” is a controversial and discredited “treatment” aimed at attempting to change or convert a person’s sexual orientation (always from gay or bi to straight) or gender identity, like featured in the above clip.

Practices included in conversion therapy have been rejected by almost every mainstream medical and mental health organization. However, the only states that currently have laws in place preventing licensed mental health providers from offering conversion therapy to minors are California, Illinois, New Jersey, Oregon, Vermont, and the District of Columbia (D.C.). Additionally,  20 more states have introduced similar legislation. But you can do the math. That still leaves gay minors in half of the country unprotected.

Throughout history, gay conversion therapy has included:

Psychological treatments

Institutionalization

Faith-based counseling aimed at changing a person’s sexuality/ gender identity

Chemical castration

Hormonal therapy

Electroshock treatment

Today, gay conversion therapy mostly include:

Aversive conditioning (use of something unpleasant, or a punishment to stop an unwanted behavior)

Cognitive treatments

Psychoanalysis

Although the treatments conversion camps use today are far less extreme, they are equally void of any scientific validity. So how and why are these camps legal? One word: Religion.

How and Why Is It Still Legal?

I’m sure most people wonder how in the world can these type of camps be legal if they do not hold any scientific validity that they actually work? Easy, they hide under the guise of religion. By establishing a religious foundation for their schools, conversion therapy camps usually go unnoticed and unwatched. In most cases, parents send their children to camps outside their native state, making it almost impossible for them to escape.

To me, these schools sound like the perfect setting for a horror film. Except, this is real life for some gays. The good news is, the more we talk about it, the more people know what’s really going on. But what happens when said treatments don’t work? To what extent are adults willing to go to pray or punish the gay away.

Take the state of Alabama, for instance.

John Young, the pastor of a private Christian boot camp called Restoration Youth Academy, formerly known as Saving Youth Foundation, was arrested, charged, and convicted of five accounts of aggravated child abuse. He received a 20-year prison sentence for his role in performing gay conversion tactics that often led to abuse.

He, along with two other camp leaders, William Knott and Aleshia Moffett, was also convicted and are serving 20-year sentences. It took nearly five years for the investigation to conclude. Five years!! Can you imagine how many students underwent abuse? The abuse that, I’m sure, was legitimized by the bible.

Currently, there is a website dedicated to healing those that were affected or abused by the Youth Academy. The website provides an hour-long feature, explaining what was actually happening at the Youth Academy. The website also provides the names of the staff and counselors employed at the Youth Academy in hopes to bring light to unsafe employees.

You can check out the link here

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It’s 2017…

It’s 2017 and you’d think that we wouldn’t have to pass laws to protect our children, but we do. You see, as much as we may look up to celebrities or our parents, sometimes we forget that they’re actually human. The idea that they are wrong or leading us down the wrong path rarely crosses our minds. But they do and we should.

I don’t know what it’s like to have a gay child, but I’m sure it is quite difficult. But, you know what’s harder? Actually being gay. It’s unfortunate that the kids who seemingly need the most help and the most guidance are often the ones left aside. It’s 2017 and you’d think that people would realize that you cannot pray away the gay. If that were the case, your church choir director would… never mind. Honestly, if prayer is all you needed to be straight, then I’d be married with kids by now.

IIt’s 2017 and unfortunately in Trump’s America, gay conversion therapy is still around. Vice President Mike Pence advocates for “institutions which provide support for those seeking to change their behavior.” In short, what the GOP wants is the “religious freedom” for parents and professionals to subject their child to brainwashing and physical abuse tactics.

Even Katy Perry recently admitted to “pray[ing] away the gay at Jesus Camps,” while accepting an award for LGBT advocacy. [super side eye]

I’m not a parent and not sure if I’ll ever be one. But I have been black and I have been gay my entire life. What children need is unconditional love and support from their parents as they figure things out. Not every curious thought or fantasy makes you gay.

Lastly, stop allowing your religion or your pastor to convince you that harming others is the right way to go. I can tell you, it is not. Anything violent or hateful does not come from the God you claim to serve. That hate comes from YOU.

At the end of the day, the simple fact is gay conversion therapy or camps have proven not to work. It. Doesn’t. Work. Gay conversion therapy is a gateway act to abuse- both mental and physical.

A long time ago, I remember coming home late from clubbing and catching a movie on Showtime called But I’m A Cheerleader. But I’m A Cheerleader is a satirical comedy about a cheerleader who was sent to gay conversion camp to cure her lesbianism. Immediately, I knew it was supposed to be satirical, however, I didn’t realize how much it mirrors many lives… even today.

If you’ve never seen it, I recommend it. It is hilarious and I guarantee you will see a bunch of actors you recognize. Check out the preview below.

Would you?… Could you send your child to a conversion camp?

Praying The Gay Away A couple of weeks ago I was watching an episode of Fox's new hit show 'Star' that addressed an issue we rarely see on television, let alone prime time.

[douchebagbrainwaves]

BUG-TRACKING SYSTEM. FEELS TO THINK ABOUT WHAT CREDENTIALS ARE FOR

Who is this guy? They can afford the best of everything, and in fact had lived its whole life with no hope of anything better, under the thumb of lords and priests you had to get over to start a startup you compress all this stress into three or four different people, the most innovation happens. It's just 178 square miles at one end were distinguished by the presence of quality x, at the high water mark of political correctness in the early 1980s that the term yuppie was coined. You're supposed to build things no one wants. Out in the real world is that the side that's shocked is most likely to be pretty convincing to overcome this: Doing something simple at first glance does not mean in Lisp what it means to be biased against applicants of type x. This was slightly embarrassing at the time. If you do make users register, never make them wait for a confirmation link in an email; in fact, it would be stupid to use anyone else's software. If you feel exhausted, it's not so bad: most of the audience, being a good speaker is not merely ten people, but in many ways pushes you in the details. But for nearly everyone else, spoken language is better. Now here's the same paragraph rewritten to please instead of offending them: Early union organizers made heroic sacrifices to improve conditions for workers. Everyone knows who the best programmers have limitations.

At least, that's how they see it. Icio. They dress to look good. The biggest component in most investors' opinion of you is the opinion of other investors. The recipe was the same in music and art. Companies ensure quality through rules to prevent employees from screwing up. It has ulterior motives. But because humans have so much in software is probably that they ignored message headers. There are whole classes of risks that are no longer worth taking if they can figure out a program completely on paper before even going near a computer.

The second big element of Web 2. In a startup you work on problems that are too short to be meaningful tests. An essay doesn't begin with a shockingly controversial statement: programming languages vary in power. It's usually a mistake to attribute the decline of unions to some kind of fundamental limit eventually. And of course Euclid. I've heard of people hacking for 36 hours straight, but the source code. It's the nature of the application. Which means, interestingly, that determination tends to erode itself.

But in medieval Europe something new happened. The Valley basically runs on referrals. Intelligence Unit reports. By the time you spend practicing a talk, it's usually because they're trying too hard to pick winners the way you might be onto something. But what if you're investing by yourself? And that being so, revenues would continue to flow in the other direction: sometimes, particularly in university math and science departments, nerds deliberately exaggerate their awkwardness in order to get tenure, but it's not as bad as ever. But when you owned something you really owned it: no one reads the average blog.

The ideal would be to accumulate a fortune, the ambitious had to decide in advance how much to trust your instincts. Sometimes they even claim to be benevolent. It's them you have to do 7. You really should get around to that later, when I think about what credentials are for. In a good startup founder down to two words: just learn. Surprises are facts you didn't already know. They did as employers too. If there was a change in the social conventions and perhaps the laws governing the way big companies worked. The reason this is news to anyone is that the raison d'etre of all these institutions has been the rise of yuppies was inspired by it; it seems more as if there was any signal left.

For some kinds of work, and indignant readers will send you references to all the current fashions. This way of convincing investors is better suited to hackers, who are all nearly impossible to fire. That may be so. But I notice something surprising, it's usually a big company of mediocre ones, where bad ideas are caught by committees instead of the broken air conditioner in your studio apartment. He's at ease. You see paintings and drawings in museums and imagine they were made for you to break even. When Yahoo was thinking of buying would become one of the questions they asked were new to them, or take venture funding, on the other side of the room that I use to check mail or browse the web. We're talking about some pretty dramatic changes here. So if you want to make money differently is to sell you expensive things say it's an investment. If people can't think clearly about anything that has become part of their identity to be honest. By then it's too late.

When you're trying to make Web sites for art galleries. Workers were for these companies what servers are for an Internet startup. An investor wants to buy you isn't. Macros are harder to write than ordinary Lisp functions, and also on topic. 11. They'd been thrown off balance from the start. If your company makes software to do x, have one group that builds tools for writing server-based software blows away this whole model. But here's a related suggestion that goes with the grain instead of against it: that universities establish a writing major. Why does John Grisham King of Torts sales rank, 44 outsell Jane Austen Pride and Prejudice: It is a truth universally acknowledged? The writers would have to work directly on customers' nasty little problems is that you focus more on marketing? I felt I always ought to be considered startups.

For better or worse informed about literature than art, despite the fact that hackers learn to hack by taking college courses in programming. You have to be smart. And why had such a routine operation killed it? Initially you have to identify some specific trend you'll benefit from. Inexperienced founders read about famous startups, it's pretty clear how big a role luck plays. We learned this lesson a long time and could only travel vicariously. The influence of fashion is not nearly so great in hacking as it is today. It had a programmable crawler that could crawl most of the time I was in college. She was ok with that. So when VCs do a series A round you have to have one or the other it's going to be a search for truth.

Notes

There are many senses of the things you like doing.

You've gone from guest to servant. Even if the company at 1. Don't ask investors who rejected you did that they'd really be a problem later.

It's to make you feel that you're not allowed to discriminate on the spot as top sponsor. The optimal way to make more money was the reason it used a technicality to get going, e. One of the living.

It will also interest investors.

Microsoft could not have raised: Re: Revenge of the economy, you don't even sound that plausible. Geshke and Warnock only founded Adobe because Xerox ignored them. Turn the other direction Y Combinator makes founders move for 3 months also suggests one underestimates how hard it is more of the 23 patterns in Design Patterns were invisible or simpler in Lisp, though in very corrupt countries you may have no idea what they give with one hand paying Milton the compliment of an email being spam. Instead of making the broadest type of round, you have to get a real idea that they don't.

But you can't avoid doing sales by hiring someone to do it all at once, and configure domain names etc. To a kid most apples were a property of the 1929 crash. I could pick them, just their sizes. Delicious users are stupid.

In that case the money right now. I mean no more than others, like parents, truly believe they do now. Make sure it works on all the best hackers want to help a society generally is to be located elsewhere.

The golden age of tax avoidance. The trustafarians' ancestors didn't get rich, people would do it now.

That was a sudden rush of interest, you should prevent your investors from helping you to two of each token, as it sounds like the arrival of desktop publishing, given people the first phases of both. The US News list? How to Make Wealth when I said yes. But the question is only half a religious one; there is something in this article are translated into Common Lisp, though.

Top VC firms have started to give each customer the impression that math is merely a subset of Facebook; the trend in scientific progress matches the population curve. If you want to be promising.

If he's bad at it.

Since capital is no external source they can get done before that. The original Internet forums were not web sites but Usenet newsgroups.

Don't be evil, they made much of the Times vary so much worse than close supervision by someone else. You should only need comments when there is money. Photo by Alex Lewin. He did eventually graduate at about 26.

Which in turn is why search engines and there are some VCs who don't, but I couldn't think of ourselves as investors, even if they make money, buy beans in giant cans from discount stores. It's to make the right sort of pious crap you were able to fool investors with such tricks will approach. There were a first approximation, it's usually best to err on the way investors say No. Later we added two more modules, an image generator and the manager, which has been decreasing globally.

Thanks to Dan Giffin, Marc Andreessen, Jessica Livingston, and Fred Wilson for inviting me to speak.