#imtiredanddepressed

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

Like this Lunar? *I take one of parrying knifes and cut one strawberry into quarters with the greens still on*

*It is very obvious that I did that on purpose too*

//Lunar looks at the strawberry, then up at Carrie, then back down at the strawberry.//

Lunar: ...No. *deadpan*

Moon: *chokes on his laughter* N- No?

Lunar: No. *unamused*

[phantoms-lair]

For Uncommon Ancestry, what I think All Might may look if he came back as a Skeleton Ghost

Ghost Might! For once poor Yagi gets clothes that fit! This is a really cool drawing, thanks so much for it!

[rainbowyoongs-blog]

A-Z Tag

tagged by @fakeloveyourself !! Thank you for the tag! <3

age: 18

birthplace: England

current time: 1:25pm

drink you last had: Strawberry milkshake

easiest person to talk to: I’d probably have to say my mum or best friend for that

fav song: It’s a toss up between every song on the new album but, probably Outro: Tear

grossest memory: Uhh... Probably the time I broke my arm?? I’m pulling a blank here

horror - yes or no: No. I’m too soft, I can’t handle it.

in love: Nope.

jealous of people: I have to admit that I can get jealous a lot, but I don’t mean to...

k: ??? I am confusion ???

love at first sight or should i walk by again: Walk by again, for sure.

middle name: Shona

number of siblings: 1 older brother and 2 younger sisters

one wish: I wish I could get a new spine, having back problems sucks.

person you called last: My dad.

question you are always asked: hmm, other than the obvious “How are you doing?” I have no clue?? 

reason to smile: Oh boy, lots of thngs make me smile... My family and friends most often though, probably...

song you last sung: Oh, I think it was actually Toxic by Brittney Spears?? My mum mentioned it and it got stuck in my head and I couldn’t not??

time you woke up: At 7:30am rip

underwear colour: White??

vacation destination: I usually go up to Scotland

worst habit: Being hella lazy?? Like I’m always napping??

x-rays: I’ve gotten only one x-ray, it was for my arm that I broke around 2 years ago. I’ve had MRIs on my spine though?? if that’s applicable here aadfga

your fav food: I have to say some nachos, like I am really craving some nachos, help..

zodiac sign: Pisces

I haven’t talked to many people here but I’ll just tag some mutuals I haven’t spoken to before, I guess?? Feel free not to do it if you don’t want to of course adfgfsa

@agustwyd @imtiredanddepressed @yournathkazeposts and if you see this and want to do it, feel free??

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

Believe it or not, Eclipse actually did genuinely care for Lunar. Eclipse just had no idea outside of villainous acts and pain to actually /show/ that he did. It was all he knew.

Like...OK this maybe a bad comparison BUT it's like a kid that came from an abusive family but has never known anything outside of that. It doesn't excuse anything that Eclipse did to Lunar but Eclipse literally didn't know better because all of what he "knew" about love and care wasn't really that.

Sun: I don't know about that, but the point still stands that he wasn't acting without thought. Not that we should compare traumas! But-

//Solar holds his hands as flat as he can, staring down at them. They still tremble and shake despite him holding them as flat and still as possible. There appear to be old cracks that have been soldered closed, as well as smaller ones.//

Solar: I can't hold 'em any more still than this right now. I wear the gloves ta help with that, an' so I don't drop everythin' I touch. Not ta mention- *pauses* Do ya promise not ta tell the others? I'm not ready for 'em all ta know yet.

Sun: I promise. I'm listening.

Solar: These're all from Moon. He did some of the mendin', but I did most of it 'cause he didn't do it right. It was just another way fer 'im ta hurt me.

Sun: How? How did he do it?

Solar: Hammers, mostly.

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

*I have a strained smile on my lips as I stare at nothing as Solar recounts how his Moon fucked up his eye*

*in a barely audible whisper* I am going to skin that Moon with a vegetable peeler.

Solar: That's my brother! I- *sighs* I don't want him hurtin' 'cause of me.

Sun: Solar. He hurt you so badly. You can't keep- Look. Our Eclipse did a lot of bad things to all of us, especially Lunar.

Solar: I heard...

Sun: Yeah. But he never....he never just- just did things without a reason behind them. He was terrible and we're all glad he isn't here to hurt anyone anymore. But even when he would hurt Lunar, he did it under the guise of doing something for a reason. Like...Like he took Lunar's glow because it wore out his battery faster. It was still terrible, but- but that sick bastard had some sort of reason. Why did your Moon take your eye?

Solar: ...'Cause I wouldn't stop cryin'. He took other things 'cause I'm the one that took our Sunny. *looks down*

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

*I start moving the more sturdier blankets that KC gathered and that I summoned around the edges of the bed, making sure Eclipse would be able to comfortably lean on them if he wanted. It kinda looked like a nest made of blankets.*

That should help if you want to lean on them. Penguino, can you make a canopy? Like the ones you'd see in fancy bedrooms with the transparent fabric? But make it so the fabric is a dark opac color to help block out any light for Eclipse.

Eclipse: *shakes his head* No...Not all dark. Can't...*takes a shuddering breath* No...No' 'gain...

Kill Code: Shh...it will not be completely dark. The string lights are on, they will keep it dim enough so that your migraine is not affected, but you are able to see.

Eclipse: ...*nods*

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

KC is right Eclipse. You are very strong.

You have endured a lot and for that, you've earned time to rest.

There are things that need to be sorted, to be addressed, and to be explained but those can wait. You have been clinging onto that strength for a long time, just to keep yourself afloat. Let us: KC, Penguino, myself, and the other anons carry you even if for a little be. Let us take care of you so you can regain that strength again.

The trauma will not go away entirely, but it can be healed with time and proper care.

And you have people around you who care Eclipse. Killcode, Penguino, and myself are just three examples. We care deeply for you so let us take care of you.

Eclipse: I'm not traumatized.

Kill Code: ...We will not discuss that at this time. We need to get you settled into bed. *carefully sets Eclipse on the edge of the bed*

Kill Code: I will finish cleaning up the lab, I will come back to-

Eclipse: Don't leave! *desperately grabs Kill Code's hand* ...Don't go.

Kill Code: .*smiles tensely, his eyes sad* ...Then I will stay here. *sits beside Eclipse*

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

*I gently place one of the lighter blankets on Eclipse.* Let me know if you want a heavier one, hun.

And right now, you need to get used to your new body before you do anything. I mean it - at least a day or two to get used to this. Right now, you need to rest to get used to actually having your /own/ body.

Eclipse: *flinches at first, then tugs the blanket closer*

Kill Code: You did not stop existing...Have you been conscious this entire time?

Eclipse: *nods silently*

Kill Code: Oh...Eclipse. *reaches for him, then pulls his hand back* Let us get you settled in a bed. You need rest.

Eclipse: N- No, I can talk. I'm fine to talk. *looks up with watery eyes and clears his throat* Dammit, stop crying!

Kill Code: No, you are not. You need rest.

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

I understand. Some things are just never going to have the "proper" time to execute. Having them done now would likely hurt as much as it would months or years from now.

.

.

.

*I look at Eclipse's new body and reach out to gently, oh so gently, place a hand on his cheek*

Welcome home, Eclipse.

//Eclipse flinches from the touch and clumsily sits up, eyes wide and flitting around the room.//

Eclipse: Wh- What's going on? Where a̸m̵ ̸I̷?̷!̶ *coughs to clear his throat, wincing at the bright lights* Where am I? Where's Lunar? I- What room is this? Who gave me a body?

Kill Code: Shh, your voicebox needs to calibrate.

Eclipse: W̴h̴o̷ ̴s̸a̷i̶d̶ ̶t̸h̸a̴t̶?̴ *coughs and groans*

Kill Code: *dims the lights* Do not touch him, he is likely over-stimulated.

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

Honestly, you are kinda more of a tiger to me, but that may just be my preference to tigers.

*I whisper to KC* Solar used to be called Bumblebee or just Bee by someone he cared apart. Unfortunately, that person is no longer alive.

Oh! *to Solar* Hey Solar, I know you said Poppy didn't do much of fortune telling, but had they ever make sigils?

((Did you know that the pattern on the back of tiger ears look like eyes to trick predators))

Kill Code: A tiger? I suppose I prefer that over being called a simple cat. Or worse yet, a 'kitty'. *shudders* Bumblebee? Hm...

Solar: Oh! They didn't do fortunes, really. An' tarot was always too much. They couldn't remember what all the cards meant. But they liked usin' runes! An' yeah, they taught me how ta make sigils!

Kill Code: Your Sun dabbled in magic?

Solar: Oh yeah, they practiced witchcraft. In fact, they taught me everythin' I know!

Kill Code: Everything, you say? *chuckles*

//The wind is back again, though it seems to brush close to Kill Code this time. He can almost hear soft laughter.//

Kill Code: It seems as though Solar did not come here alone.

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

Like I said, Eclipse - the one from this dimension - is the lesser evil of those two.

I think you are doing much better than before. I don't think your past self would have thought to soft block dimensions for others. I know that Poppy would have loved to have you as a brother.

That being said: *shouting to whichever keeps threatening to eat Moon's sticks* IF ANY OF YOU EVEN TRY TO LICK THOSE STICKS, I WILL EITHER TELL YOUR PARENTS OR SEND YOU TO TIME OUT FOR TEN MINUTES!!!!

Moon: I know I'm better now, I just... *sighs* Ok. So that's who Poppy is? This Eclipse's Sun? Makes sense why he seems to be so..attached isn't the right word. Fond of him, maybe? I don't know.

Either way, I'm not going to let him think there's going to be a repeat here of whatever he experienced there. I'll be sure of it.

//Moon smirks when Carrie yells out about the sticks.// Good luck trying to keep them away from them. Not like I leave them out in the open, but they're determined. And stubborn.

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

@im-tired-and-depressed //Sorry this took a minute, it takes a while to break down a long ask! That and we can't have Moon know everything...//

Moon: Uh...I'll be honest, most of that sounded like static and random noise. But I figured his Moon did something to him. No idea who Poppy is, but it sucks that the other guy was like that...

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

Baby Sun, you need not be sorry for worrying for the well being of your brother.

Honestly, we need to make an "over excessive apology" jar for you. And maybe a "I kept a dangerous secret from my family" jar for Moon.

*I said the last part in a teasing tone at Moon*

Moon: *rolls his eyes* Better lump Ves into that.

Sun: *sniffles and smiles*

Moon: Hm? That funny?

Sun: *nods and giggles*

Moon: Won't be funny when we really get you a "Sorry Jar"

Sun: Soww-

Moon: Nope. *taps his nose* No more of that.

Sun: *blinks, then laughs*

Moon: There he is. *smiles* There's our Silly Sunny.

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

.......Thank you Computer....wait...I don't remember if I heard it but you have a name right? *I find the wood scraps and start filling in the hole too*

Computer: I do not have a name, actually. I am just Computer. ...The hole is looking less 'holy' [laugh.mp3] [I-am-in-misery.mp3].

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

Eclipse didn't try to kill a baby AI that resided in his brother's body. That Moon was a Bad Moon Man.

//Harvest freezes, eyes wide in shock.//

Harvest: He what?! *covers his mouth* His Moon did what?

Bloody: Again! Again!!

Solar: It doesn't work if yer expectin' it-

Lunar: Please?

Solar: Sorry, I jus' can't- *gasps and pennies suddenly fall from his sleeves* Now how'd that happen?

Bloody and Lunar: *loud cheering*

Harvest: How could anyone do that?!

[lookwhatyoudidithasanxiety]

Ah, that static happens when I mention something that others have to find out themselves. I guess I did overstep Solar's boundaries too but you are right. His....Moon was like Eclipse was too Lunar but....comparing them is injustice towards Eclipse. That is ho bad things were for him - /Eclipse would be the lesser evil/.

Harvest: Worse than Bad Sun Man? How could anyone be worse than him...

Solar: Heh, you got somethin' behind yer ear.

Bloody: *gasps* What? What behind ear?

Solar: It's....*pulls out a penny*

Bloody: *gasps* HOW?!

Lunar: How'd you do that?!

Solar: *chuckles*

Harvest: He's so kind... How could anyone be so cruel?