Imagine...
It's late one night and Batman is running on one hour of sleep for the past week.
He's tired. His kids are tired. They are all going home early to catch up on sleep. No questions.
So he gathers everyone into the Batmobile and heads straight to the Batcave. It's when he tells everyone to go get some rest that something unexpected happens.
"Okay Daddy."
That wasn't any one of his kids
Bruce turns to see a little girl rubbing her drowsy eyes while letting out a yawn.
Right next to her, holding her hand, is a boy that looks to be a couple years older than her and equally as tired as his companion. They both had black hair and blue eyes.
All of the batfamily are now wide awake and staring at the kids.
"B, do you want to tell us something." Jason asks.
"Father," Damian is giving him an accusatory stare.
The girl then blinks a bit before looking straight at Batman.
"You're not Daddy." She then starts tugging on the boy's hand. "Dan! That's not Daddy!"
The boy (who they now now as Dan) immediately snaps to attention and pushes the girl to stand behind him. He's glaring at them now.
"I knew you had a adoption tendency, B. I didn't think you'd kidnap your next pair of kids." Jason says
"We've been kidnapped!" the girl yells. If it was possible, Dan starts glaring at them even harder.
Meanwhile
Knock! Knock!
Alfred opens the door to see that the visitor is an eldritch shadow-like being with glowing green eyes that was towering over him.
"Sorry for disturbing you so late at night, but I believe my children are in your house."
Basically Danny is taking care of de-aged Ellie and Dan. He's in his eldritch form when meeting the batfamily.
Batman in turn thinks that Danny is evil and most likely a very bad father. (granted, how many eldritch beings of immense powers turn out to be good fathers in the DC universe?)
But is immediately proven wrong when the two kids immediately snuggle up against Danny with not sense of fear at all.
Meanwhile since Batman took them there, Ellie and Dan take it as an open invitation to come over. So they just pop up in the mansion whenever they want.
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Yuu walks into the Lounge to see Jade trying to manhandle a eel form Floyd as Azul stands nearby with a few buckets. They freeze when they see Yuu and Floyd scrambles out of Jade's hold and slithers over to Yuu to hide behind her. She gets a crash course in learning what Vil uses for his facial cream. Yuu gets Azul to give her the buckets, picks up Floyd, and says she'll be back.
Yuu returns with twice as many buckets, leaving Azul stunned and asking how she managed that.
"I just massaged him. No need for wringing him dry or anything. He had a lotta knots in his back."
Jade and Azul stare at her before Jade asks:
"...Can I be chosen next?"
Floyd ends up being very docile and out of it for the next few days.
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getting older can be so amazing? you get more familiar with yourself. learn tips & tricks for troubleshooting your own brain. trial & error helps you build routines that minimize discomfort, maximize reward. your preferences/interests don't get set in stone, but you do find out which ones are going to stay with you in the long-term, and which ones are fun but transient joys to appreciate in the moment.
you learn that the world is so much more complex than you were taught, and that that's okay, and that there's an endless supply of things you can learn or watch or experience or think about if you want to. if you're lucky, you loosen up, stop putting so much pressure on yourself. if you're lucky, you learn to recognize that negative inner voice, and whack it with a baseball bat until it hushes up. if you're lucky, you learn to treat yourself gently, not because you are fragile but because you are worthy of gentleness. (i hope you are lucky.)
and some things will change. some things will get better. some things will get good. and maybe you start to recover from the dehumanizing stress of childhood/education. maybe you learn the power of your own autonomy. maybe you learn how to walk away from bad situations (which is a superpower even if you don't realize it yet). and you get to choose your own clothes. and your own food. and which relationships to pursue! and what you do with your free time. and with your life (but don't worry you get to choose that gradually). and that's crazy! and sometimes scary. and extraordinarily, indescribably precious.
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Shrimply Yours~
In which you invoke your shrimp privileges to cheer Floyd up.
Floyd x GN Reader! Enjoy, shrimpies!!~
—————
“Y’know Floyd, I’d say you’re the shrimp, not me.”
Maybe you really did have a death-by-squeezing wish. Or maybe your plot-armor protection had finally worn off. The eel in question lifted his head slowly at your words and side-eyed you, his golden eye glinting ominously in the Mostro Lounge kitchen’s light.
You’d been washing the dishes after asking Azul for a job in exchange for a little extra madol on the side. For the most part, your day had been as peaceful as it could’ve (the life of a magicless prefect was always maniacal), until you heard arguing from outside the kitchen. You all but jumped when Floyd slammed the door open and wordlessly stalked to the stove, and you spotted Azul walking off shaking his head to himself. Floyd shoved pan on the heat and began frying something, completely ignoring your presence. Was it even possible to fry chicken so aggressively?
In any case, Floyd seemed a little more volatile than usual at the moment, even considering it was him. The other students who’d been in the kitchen with you before had scuttled out before Floyd could snap at them too. But in any case, you knew that Floyd’s mood flipped faster than Crowley leaving all his work to you. So, you thought you’d try to lighten the mood.
At your words, Floyd slowly brought his head up from his deep-frying, golden-and-olive colored eyes zeroing in on you, baring his sharp, shiny teeth at you in a scowl. And in that split second, you suddenly remembered that Floyd was, in fact, a mer-eel. Moray, specifically. A predator. A predator that probably ate shrimpies like you. Who was now looking at you predatorily.
“What did ya just say, shrimpy?” His pupils were practically pin-pricks, and for a moment you swore you could hear the Jaws theme song in your head. You could remember, time and time again, your friends and upperclassmen telling you not to engage Floyd when he was in one of his moods. Even up until now, you’d never been on the awful end of his anger, especially alone. But you weren’t called beast-tamer for nothing, damn it, and maybe that title could extend to taming angry Floyd’s too. An angry Floyd that was still your friend.
“I said, you’re the shrimp, not me.” You maintained eye-contact with him, almost challenging him, ‘come at me, bro.’ You tried to keep a straight face, although you were deflating rapidly by the second because by Sevens this was so stupid but-
“Because you’re shrimply amazing.”
One second passed. Two. Three.
Then Floyd broke into a wide, sharp-toothed grin. He surged towards you, completely forgetting the frying food. “D’awww, SHRIMPY!!!”
He swooped behind you, wrapping his arms around you and picking you up. Your legs flailed around and now your arms were locked in as Floyd spun around the kitchen haphazardly with you in his arms. “Shrimpy knows just how to cheer me up! I knew this is why I kept you around!” He laughed cheerily, bobbing you up and down.
“FLOYD!” You cried, “PUT ME DOWN-“ the kitchen swirled crazily around you, as Floyd babbled some song or other cheerfully. Thankfully he’d stopped spinning, but began shaking you side to side while humming, “Shrimpy’s so brave n’ nice, all the other guppies left when they saw me but only Shrimpy stayed!”
He started pouting, and squished his cheek into yours. “Azul was bein’ mean to me, making me work now. Just ‘cause I roughed up a few customers doesn’t mean it was my fault! They shoulda been nice to me~”
Even though you were basically suspended in the air by him, you smiled at Floyd’s words. “Glad I could help Floyd, that was so mean of Azul,” you consoled him, hoping he’d put you down. He bent over until your feet were safely on the sweet, sweet ground, but didn’t let you go from his arms. The two of you swayed together, basking in each other’s company in the subpar lighting of the kitchen, until you frowned.
“…Hey, is something burning?”
“Ah shit, I burned the chicken.”
———
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