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Diavolo: *hugging MC from behind* *has a cute puppy expression*
MC: ...
Lucifer: Say, MC. Did you meet him before me? How many times had he kissed you? I'm really curious.
MC: ...
Barbatos: And young master, so this is where you go when I can't find you in your office. *smiles*
Diavolo: To answer your question, Lucifer. I think I was the second they had summoned. And for the kisses, that was their first from me.
MC: Thank you for explaining that... Though it didn't help.
Lucifer: *obviously fuming from the inside*
Lucifer: MC, I'm sure you do know what will be the punishment if you have fooled a demon. *smiles*
MC: ...
MC: There are three. Which of them?
Barbatos: *chuckles* Give this to me, Lucifer.
Lucifer: *frowns* And why will I do that?
Barbatos: So I can legally ask them for marriage.
Lucifer: Shut it. I was the one who asked.
Diavolo: ...
Diavolo: These two are crazy about you.
MC: Don't say that. That's a bad omen.
Lucifer: Hm, where should I put my mark on you?
MC: ...
MC: Can't you, like, put it while I'm standing?
Lucifer: No, babe. Our position right now is perfect. *straddles them while they're lying down*
Barbatos: Really, Lucifer. You can't do anything without making it sensual. *smiling with irritation*
Lucifer: Watch me. *smirks*
MC: ...
MC: Ow!
Diavolo: Are you okay?
MC: *holds onto their mouth, tearing up*
Barbatos: ...
MC: *muffled* Why the tongue...
Barbatos: Lucifer, you're dead.
Lucifer: *smiles proudly*
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If your threshold for ”oppression” is that low, then you’re not “oppressed.”
Stop co-opting and diluting the language of those with real problems.
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You have been warned 👀
https://www.teepublic.com/user/missostrich
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How To Discourage A Changeling
Me: You’re not going out like that, are you?
Changeling: (pauses gloating) What? I look just like you!
Me: I don’t know, I just don’t think you’re pulling it off. The way you slouch is all wrong—and that scar is on the wrong side! I see it in the mirror every morning, I should know.
Changeling: (sputtering) Mirrors give REVERSE IMAGES—
Me: And my outfit! You’re holding at least THREE magical items wrong! Look, don’t go through any fairy doors, that’s all I’m saying.
Changeling: ...Wait, what happens if I—
Me: Oh well, it’s probably for the best. Pretty sure that wendigo is still after me, so I need to lay low. Do me a favor and lead him off for a few days, will you?
Changeling: (horrified) How can you be this inconvenient to replace?!
Me: Practice.
----
More assorted nonsense can be found on my How To Guides For Mythical Creatures Masterlist
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inconvenience
I’ll never understand you,
but my God,
how I want you.
You happen very suddenly
before I have time to do what I usually do
to stay safe.
Yrsa Daley-Ward
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Inconvenience for all users
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No one talks about how hard it is to open up to people and let them in, trust them, believe them when they say "I'll be there.", "I care.", "You can talk to me.", "We're friends/family.". How hard it is to let your walls down and allow yourself to believe that someone truly means it when they tell you they hold space for you in some capacity. No matter how small.
You crack your chest open for those people and carve them out a cozy little space in your ribcage. You keep it safe and you guard it because you believe they did the same for you.
No matter what, no matter how long - you keep that space for them and only them. You believe wholeheartedly that they understand how much they mean to you, for you to have let them in like that.
Then you realize at some point that it was never that deep. They never noticed what it meant to you. You never had a place in their ribcage and you suddenly look around a room and realize that they never saw you, but an amalgamation of noncommittal traits that they passively noticed over the years.
You are whatever was right in front of their eyes at the moment. Nothing too complex.
That would actual take effort and effort is reserved for things that matter.
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Top looks in the ShopShifty store this week!
Rat Shirt ft Rats | Anxiety | Inconvenience
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Love this so much!! From Lauren Berlant – On The Inconvenience of Other People
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MC: Levi and Mammon already went home. What about you, Satan?
Satan: *holding onto their sleeve while they're walking* You haven't retrieved my cat from your witch friend yet.
MC: *confused frown* But she let me searched her house and I didn't see any cat.
Satan: There should be.
MC: ...
MC: How about this? Will you go home if I give you one?
Satan: *pouts* *ponders*
Satan: *then shakes his head* No. Forget about it. Since you can't find my cat, I'm not leaving your side.
MC: ...
MC: Why does it sound to me you're doing this on purpose?
Satan: *puts on a poker face* You're just overthinking.
MC: *obviously not convinced*
Barbatos: Why are you in my place?
Lucifer: It's not yours. But same question, what are you doing in my place?
Satan: *snuggling on MC* I'm a house cat.
MC: ...
Diavolo: Congrats, MC! You've got yourself a pet! *genuinely amused*
MC: Uh... Thank you?
Diavolo: Though these two men right here seem not to be happy about it.
Lucifer and Barbatos: *smiling but both seething in anger*
Lucifer: MC, don't you prefer dogs more because cats are feisty?
Barbatos: Or how about bats? They can be trained.
MC: Don't bats need their natural habitat?
Barbatos: I'm mostly talking about myself.
MC: Oh.
Satan: Wow. You two are trying hard to get their attention.
Lucifer and Barbatos: SPEAK FOR YOURSELF!
Diavolo: MC, can I borrow your shower again? Oh, also your bathroom supplies. I really like the soap and shampoo you use.
Lucifer and Barbatos: *turns their head at Diavolo*
Diavolo: Hm?
Lucifer: Diavolo.
Barbatos: Young master.
MC: Please don't destroy my house.
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The Nightmare is following me?!
Well, can it kindly fuck off.
Yeah it was scary at first but now after a while, the Nightmare has become The Inconvenience!
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When you have the luxury of learning about your "oppression" through postmodern and Marxian philosophy vanity classes in name-brand colleges, it's safe to say that you're extremely privileged, not oppressed.
If you were actually oppressed, they wouldn't be teaching it out in the open in colleges at all, earning degree credits and even funded by government loans, to students sitting in airconditioned lecture theaters taking notes on their MacBook Air.
If you were actually oppressed, things would look much more like Iran or China or Singapore, and much less like a kindergarten.
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The Inconvenience
For the @schittscreekdrabbleblog word: convenience
(okay, I made it inconvenience).
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They didn’t speak for the first fifteen minutes into the 45-minute drive to the winery. Herb had called Mr. Rose and told him that he needed to “come get your wife and son right now.” Without hesitation, Patrick took his keys and drove them to the winery.
“Patrick, I’m sorry for this inconvenience. I know you were looking forward to a quiet afternoon.”
“Mr. Rose, you’re the only person in the world who will understand this. It’s the inconvenience that I love. He wouldn’t be the same without it.”
The dark Rose eyes smiled brightly. They both loved the inconvenience.
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