#incorrect clint barton quotes

[incorectquoteswlw]

Clint: So, how is it working with Yelena?

Kate: Good, she keeps me on my knees

Clint:

Kate: FUCK I MEANT TOES

[jjsmaybank20]

Wanda: Y/N kissed me!

Natasha: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!

Wanda: It was unbelievable!

Natasha: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!

Thor: Okay, we wanna hear everything. Natasha, get the wine and turn off your phone. Wanda, does this end well or do we need tissues?

Wanda: Oh, it ended very well.

Natasha: Do not start without me! Do not start without me!

Thor: Okay, alright, let’s hear about the kiss. Was it a soft brush against your lips or was it like a, you know, “I gotta have you now” kind of thing?

Wanda: Well, at first it was really intense, you know? And then, oh God, and then we just sort of sunk into it.

Thor: Ohh... So, okay, was she holding you? Or were her hands on your back?

Wanda: First they started out on my waist and then they slid up and then they were in my hair.

Natasha and Thor: Ohhh.

*meanwhile*

Y/N, eating pizza in her room: And, uh, and then I kissed her.

Tony: Tongue?

Y/N: Yeah.

Clint: Cool.

[incorrectmarvels]

Kate, to Clint: I don’t understand why adults have a coffee problem, just wake up!

[fanficwriting]

kate: so obviously i'm in love with her.

clint: yelena?

kate: yeah. thoughts?

Clint: and prayers.

[fr1day-incredible]

*Clint does something stupid*

Natasha: "Alright, now i have prof that you never graduated kindergarten"

[heavenlyangeliq]

Clint: So, what, now I'm just supposed to do anything that Loki does? I mean, what if he jumped off a cliff?

Tony: If Loki were to jump off a cliff, he would've done his due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes, if you see Loki jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.

Clint: You jump off a cliff.

Tony: Gladly. Provided Loki did it first.

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Tony: I'm a Stark, flirting is part of my heritage.

Clint: What does that mean?

Natasha: His father was a slut too.

[cobaltperun]

Happy black widow

Nat: *eating her sandwich that "mysteriously" appeared on her table*

-other side of the room-

Clint: Really? Another sandwich?

Y/N: *looking away and whispering* Well-fed black widow is a happy black widow and I have intentions with the Black Widow...

Clint: Yeah? And what are those intentions?

Y/N: *still whispering* She looks so happy and cute when she eats them.

Clint: Adorable.

Yelena: Just ask her out already!

Clint: *patting Yelena on the back* They'll get there. Eventually.

*Later*

Y/N: *drinking favorite beverage* Whoever brought this is my second favorite person.

Yelena: The first is Natasha?

Y/N: Yup.

-other side of the room-

Nat: *smiling proudly*

Clint: Maybe it would be more effective if you weren't sneaky about it?

Nat: We'll get there.

Somehow has a part 2 now.

[marvel-lous-guy]

Steve: okay, team bonding exercises! What is everyone's biggest fear?

Clint: accidentally committing tax fraud

Sam: sharks

Nat: your more likely to be killed by a vending machine than a shark

Peter: actually, your more likely to be bitten by a stranger in New York than by a shark anywhere else in the nation

Clint: I'm changing mine to strangers in New York

Bucky: trains

[togrowoldinv]

*Y/n finding out everyone knows she’s pregnant*

Y/n: I only told Natasha because she’s my wife!

Natasha: I only told Yelena because she’s my sister.

Yelena: I told Kate because she’s my best friend.

Kate: I just told Clint because he’s like a father to me.

Clint: I told many, many people.

[its-really-dry]

y/n: *sitting in natasha's lap with their face in her boobs*

tony: *walks in* uhhhhh......... what's going on?

clint: nothing really. y/n just lost energy *continues to read his magazine*

tony: that still doesn't explain the whole *points at nat and y/n*

wanda: oh! think of it as a charging port, but for lesbians

kate: *is sad* i wish i was a lesbian *pouts*

yelena: you are. dumb suka

kate: then where are my booby-chargers?

y/n: *gets off natasha and holds their arms out to kate*

kate: *gets giggly and runs over to y/n*

tony: im not even going to entertain that with a follow up question

[incorectquoteswlw]

Yelena: I guess this is goodbye

Kate: What? Why is it goodbye?

Yelena: We must part ways, my love

Nat: I just asked you to help me carry dinner in

Yelena: The cruel twists of fate have pulled us apart

Kate, tears in her eyes: I can't live without you

Yelena: Be strong, we can be strong

Nat: Forget it, Clint come help me

Clint: Gladly, holy shit

[jjsmaybank20]

Clint: Where do you think you'll end up, hell or heaven?

Natasha: I hope hell. It's where all the gay people are.

Y/N: It's lit.

Y/N: Pun intended.

Clint: Y'all are weird.

[incorrectmarvels]

Clint: I overslept.

Kate: It’s 4:30 in the afternoon.

[fanficwriting]

Bucky: i just told sam i loved him.

Clint:

Clint: you literally just told Sam, and i quote, "if you make me feel feelings, I'll punch you."

Bucky: i just told Sam i loved him!

[fr1day-incredible]

Kate: "We have a problem!"

Clint: "No, YOU have a problem, all i have is Saturday morning coffee to drink"