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#incorrect greek quotes
simugeuge · 2 days
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Odysseus: is that you, Athena?
Owl: 🦉
Odysseus: 🤨
Owl: 🦉
Odysseus: 🫤
Owl: 🦉
Odysseus: 🙁
Owl: 🦉
Odysseus: 🥱
Owl: ohh big stretch!
Odysseus: I KNEW IT
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incorrecthomer · 1 day
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Nestor: Guys, guys! Lets take a vote. Agamemnon: Secret vote! Everybody cover your eyes! Diomedes, eyes closed: We won't know the result. Menelaus, eyes closed: Well, say your vote out loud. Odysseus, eyes closed: We'll know each other's voices. Achilles, eyes still closed: Ajax has a point.
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meditando-en-paris · 1 year
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Odysseus: Do it or you're straight.
Achilles: *Loud gasp*
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0lympian-c0uncil · 3 months
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Poseidon: Which one of you was going to tell me that tea taste different if you put it in hot water
Athena,*slowly puts down her book*: Y-You were putting it in cold water....
Poseidon: ....
Hera: Poseidon. Answer the question. Poseidon!
Poseidon: Yeah I thought for like 5 years that people just put it in hot water to speed up the tea-ification process. Didn't realize there was an actual reason.
Everyone: ....
Poseidon: You think I have the patience to boil water?
Dionysus: You don't have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes????
Apollo,*grabbing him*: Why are you. putting it in the microwave to boil it?!
Dionysus: Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove?!
Apollo: It takes less than a minute!
Hermes: BESTIE IS YOUR STOVE TOP POWERED BY THE FUCKING SUN?????
Apollo: HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE YOU TO BOIL A CUP OF WATER ON THE STOVE!??!
Hermes: Like 7 minutes!
Dionysus: *nods*
Apollo: Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat and it boils in like 2 minutes less than that and you use a saucepan.
Zeus: HA- You're putting the whole mug on the stove?????? on medium heat???? You're stove is enchanted!
Athena: Every single person in this room is a fucking lunatic...
Demeter: Do none of you own a fucking kettle!?
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The Song of Achilles
Achilles: OKAY SO LOOK AT THAT FUCKING GORGEOUS PERSON IN THE FUCKING MIRROR
Narcissus *in spirit*: Bitch yes, we both slay
Achilles: I SAID LOOK, PATROCLUS
Narcissus: *tsk* I thought we were vibing.
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starry-eon · 2 months
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rip alexander the great you would've loved the teenage tumblr girls that obsess over patrochilles as much as you did
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genericpuff · 5 months
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"Cronus, God of Time, God of Decay-"
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"...in the face of his own mortality, he devoured Rhea's creations, of earth and sea, limb by limb, until none but the sky remained."
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mytholots · 5 months
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Apollo, *acting tough*: You guys don't want to mess with me.
Dionysus: Yeah, Apollo will straight up cry in public. Don't try him.
Apollo: Exactly, I will straight up-
Apollo: ...
Apollo, *tearing up*: Dio, why would you say that?!
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incorrectgreekgods · 9 months
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Zeus: When I got married, you know what Hera often said to me? Poseidon: Please stop sleeping with other people?
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pelideswhore · 10 months
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Hermes, Apollo and Hephaestus, barging into Poseidon's room: POSEIDON!!!! Poseidon, dropping his drink: WHAT THE FUCK- Hephaestus: SAY I CAN MAKE A TACTICAL ROOMBA Poseidon: A what- Why are you asking me?! Hermes: Zeus and Hera will say no and Maia and Leto aren’t here! Poseidon: … I guess? Go for it. Apollo: FUCK YEA- *leaves* Poseidon: … am I the fun uncle?
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mytholympus · 2 years
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Aphrodite: When I see initials carved into a tree with a heart, I think it’s so romantic! Two lovers on a date…
Ares: One of them carrying a knife for some reason
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incorrecthomer · 2 days
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Small Ajax: Time sensitive question how flirt girl. Agamemnon: Throw rocks at her. Odysseus: Hot Dogs. Achilles: Kill her. Ajax: Thanks guys
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meditando-en-paris · 1 year
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Thetis: You can't marry Patroclus. He is not worthy of you!
Achilles: It seems that someone will not be invited to the wedding.
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0lympian-c0uncil · 5 months
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Ares and Aphrodite as two war gods ⚔️🌹
*Repost*
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