#incorrect sirius black

[incorrectwolfstar]

sirius: i was gonna say we could do a marilyn monroe and john f kennedy roleplay but i’d get too much into it

remus: how?

sirius: because you’d be all sexy and say “come to bed, mr. president,” and i’d be like “i can’t, i need to increase the amount of american military advisors in south vietnam by eighteen.”

[linnea-bowiesversion]

Remus: would you rather stab Sirius or-

Regulus: stab Sirius.

Remus: but I didn’t even say the other option

Regulus: I know, but I would still stab Sirius.

Remus:

Sirius: not gonna lie, I’m feeling a bit unsafe in this house. Does anyone else feel the same way?

[that-bitch-kat3]

baby sirius: mum am i adopted?

walburga: of course not.

walburga: why would i ever choose you?

[skylarinfinity]

[sirius learn he have a son]

male reader : so... you are sirius orion black?

sirius : [scrunch his nose] don't need to say full name.

male reader : if you put together your initials you will get SOB, which is fitting the way you look right now.

sirius : [baffled] wha-

remus : [nodding] yup, definitely your son.

tags lists @sonicqaulan @graysonfriggason @thebettermaximofftwins @sloanalistair @acienthazard @starlinggoldeneyes @ortegaolsen @wednesdaywanda @sandwichmarvel @gardenofmarvel @wanda-cabin-natasha-jacket @panandinpain0 @badblondebisexualboy @loving-wanda-in-every-universe

[mischievous-thunder]

Remus: Your barking woke me up at 6 a.m. on my day off.

Sirius, scoffing: My barking saved you from being murdered today and yet you're so ungrateful.

Remus: It was just a plastic bag, Sirius.

Sirius, haughtily: Looked sketchy enough to me.

[anabinsfeld]

if lost, return to moony

[give-bucky-his-boyfriend-back]

In the gryffindor dorm

Sirius: *sees Remus walking around shirtless* I can't handle this, this is too much. I have to give him my jacket. I can't contain myself right now

Remus: *In Sirius's jacket *

Sirius:

Sirius : Oh no.

[multi-bookworm]

*at 2am*

Sirius: what if-

Remus: *deeply disappointed sigh*

Sirius: what if the sky farted out clouds.

Remus: ...

Remus: *sighs in even deeper disappointment*

[m00nagegaydream]

Snape: Scumbag.

Sirius: Nutter.

Snape: Twat.

Sirius: You have a large nose.

Snape: You have a small dick.

Remus: He doesn't. I've seen it.

Sirius: ;)

Remus: ;)

Snape:

[moonyscardigan13]

Sirius: Here is my wall of inspirational people.

James: Is that a picture of you?

Sirius: Yes, I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.

[incorrectwolfstar]

remus: yeah i dunno. we talked about it and he seemed sincere so we figured we’d give it another try, and sirius has been trying so hard to make things right

james: i guess you could say that you’re back in black

remus: don’t compare my sex life with ac/dc again please

[linnea-bowiesversion]

James: I think you have PTSD

Sirius: yeah, I have PTSD. Proficient talent for sucking dick.

James, I also think we need to talk about your use of humor as a coping mechanism.

Sirius: Prongs I don’t think you understand how clever what I just said was.

[that-bitch-kat3]

sirius: bitches be like “you’re mine”

sirius: first of all i’m on probation “i” belong to the state

[thebookofthefaeries]

Sirius, from the other room: what’s the length of the great wall of china?

Remus: i told you i’m not your personal—

Remus, pinging like an incoming message: 21,196.18 kilometres

Sirius: cool thanks

[spikybanana]

Sirius: lol Tesco was selling aubergines for 69p

Remus:

Sirius: what

Sirius: I *saw* you staring at it I *knew* you were thinking it

Sirius: I'm just saying it cause you wouldn't

Sirius: coward

[anabinsfeld]

fem sirius AGAIN bc I’m in love, deal with it