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adventures-with-ana · 3 years

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— Small Town Life —

Lee Bodecker x Reader/OFC // 5.688 18+ only, minors dni; oral sex (f receiving), fingering, hand job, unprotected sex, age gap (reader/OFC is mid-20′s)

Being forced to live in Knockemstiff was some kind of cruel and unusual punishment, but there was a reward waiting at the Sheriff's station for the trouble.

Autor’s Note: This was supposed to be posted for Christmas, but better late then never right?

I hated this tiny ass town.

Knockemstiff, Ohio wasn't even a town, I was barely convinced it was a real place at all. My parents had forced me to move here six months ago, telling me that some time in the country would do me good. Which was really just their clever little way of avoiding sending me to rehab, which probably wouldn't have even taken me in because all I did was smoke pot. Instead I got exiled to Tiny Town, USA.

I swear you could walk from one end of the town to the other in, like, ten minutes. Along that walk you wouldn't find much. I felt like there were only ten houses in the entirety of the town. One church, one diner, one liquor store at each end, ten houses, and a population of twelve plus a dog.

Perhaps that was an exaggeration, but I didn't care. This tiny little dirt hill the locals try desperately to call a town sucked. There was one, single, shining beacon of goodness in that little place, and it came in the form of a man everyone told me was bad news. A dirty cop, an unfaithful man, a guy who cared more about his 7am black coffee than he did any other human being. Everything that could be wrong with a man was apparently present in Sheriff Lee Bodecker.

I didn't believe an ounce of that horse shit. I might not have lived here long, but I knew how things worked in a small town. Gossip and rumors started by bored and nosey neighbors were taken as strict fact and no one bothered to try and learn any different. No one but me, and I was only bothering because I found myself attracted to the Sheriff. He was tall and broad shouldered, had a soft tummy I wanted to get my hands on, and - though they were rare - a smile that could light up the whole state.

I noticed that the good, or bad - whatever, Sheriff liked to stop in at the small diner in town almost every morning before heading to the police station. Normally I didn't like being awake that early in the morning, but my lovely aunt - whom I was forced to live with - refused to ever let me sleep in past 5:30am. When I had first arrived and she woke me up that early, I may have gone overboard and threatened to burn her house down if she ever did it again. Not one to give a shit, she tossed a twenty pound bag of chicken feed on me and told me to go feed the damn birds.

Eventually I got used to the early rising and now was even grateful for it. I made good use of my time and started warming a stool at the little diner just to get the opportunity to see the Sheriff. It had worked out better than I thought, not only did the Sheriff and I become friends but he even offered me a job at the station with him. His secretary was out on maternity leave and he didn't have anyone to play cards with while no calls came in.

That became my life. I'd grab to coffees in the morning and bring them to the station for Lee and I. I'd answer any calls that came in, filed incident reports when necessary, etc, etc. It was all pretty boring, but on the bright side I got pretty good at poker and I enjoyed watching the Sheriff's cheeks pinken whenever I teased him about starting a game of strip poker.

"I'd have to step up my game for that," he'd say, followed by some comment about the way he looked - and it was never complimentary.

When December rolled around I decided the station needed to be a little more festive than the bleak, boring grey walls we were so used to. So one weekend I took the liberty of going down to the dollar store in Chillicothe and loading up on cheap decorations to turn those grey walls festive and bright. Even wrapping a string of lights around my desk and stapling a green garland to the wall to make it look like a Christmas tree.

"What's all this?" Lee asked as he came into the station with our coffee that morning.

"It's Christmas!" I announced happily, throwing my arms in the air with a giant grin.

He just chuckled. "Don't expect me to put on a Santa hat," he grumped as he headed to his office, only to find a Santa hat waiting on his desk. He turned back to look at me with an unamused expression.

"Hey, I put it there before you said no," I defended. "But come on, Lee. Where's your holiday spirit?" I pouted.

"In Maui," he responded dryly, tossing the hat to the side as sipped his coffee.

"Oooh," I said, taking one of the chairs in front of his desk. "Warm sandy beaches, endless mimosas, colorful bikinis," It did not escape my notice that Lee swallowed thickly at that last one. "I think I'm gonna go join that holiday," I laughed.

Lee did warm up to the Christmas spirit by the end of the week though. Mostly because every morning as he came to work he found that Santa hat sitting in the middle of his desk, after four days of tossing it to the side he finally sighed and put it on. I laughed in triumph when he came out of his office wearing it. He gave me a half bemused look, telling me to hush it as he swapped the tasseled Santa hat for his regular one to go out on a call.

The week after that was the church's Christmas party, and Lee already told me that we had to go. It was a town thing, and if he wanted to keep his position as Sheriff he'd be awful stupid to miss something like that. He had to show everyone he was festive and doing this little town justice as it's Sheriff. Which everyone knew was a lie, even I had come to see that the rumors of Lee being a bit of a dirty cop weren't rumors.

I wasn't supposed to know about it of course, but there wasn't anyone else in the station to help deflect suspicion. I didn't really think much of it anyway. From what I could find myself the only thing Lee did was turn the other cheek when it came to the not-so-secret secret back rooms of a local bar that were used for sex workers. I didn't think not arresting women trying to make a living was a bad thing, so I didn't really consider Lee a 'dirty' cop.

Besides, my mind went to much different places when I thought of the word 'dirty' and Lee together. Like the fantasies I conjured every time he was called to the bar because someone complained about the back rooms. I imagined going with him to the bar, watching as he cleared it out like he had to before telling the owners to wait a day or two before opening the rooms up again, and then taking him into one of them myself.

Those thoughts weren't productive though and I had a feeling Lee wouldn't have been to happy to hear them either. He didn't really have all that high of an opinion of himself, I'd noticed. I'd started to wonder if some of the rumors about him around town weren't stuff caused by his own mouth. Calling himself fat, ugly, old; the list was quite extensive if I allowed him to go off on a tangent. I tried to keep his thoughts nicer, telling him he shouldn't talk about himself like that, and that there was nothing wrong with the way he looked.

It was worse on the day of that church party. We were going to head over towards the end of our shifts and he was not happy about it at all. I tried to quell his issues but today just seemed like the kind of day where nothing was going to make him happy. I tried to make things better by telling him he didn't have to wear the Santa suit to the party. Days earlier I'd bet him a game of poker that if he lost he had to dress up with me, I hadn't expected him to agree to the terms but he did and he accepted his loss right up until that moment.

"Nah, you won fair and square darlin'," he said, sighing as his anger finally broke. He never could manage to stay mad at me. "'Sides, church could probably use a Santa to entertain the kids."

I grinned as I grabbed my bag and we headed out. I was going to change into my outfit at the church. I hadn't told Lee what it was yet, aside from promising him it wasn't a Mrs. Claus costume to match his. I had debated on going that route, but I didn't feel like getting the rumor mill started again. I'd heard enough gossip once I started to work at the sheriff's station, I didn't need anymore to remind me that regardless of what the town thought Lee and I weren't actually doing anything together.

Perhaps my outfit of choice wasn't any better than the Mrs. Claus idea though, because when I joined the party again wearing a cute little elf costume the only thing people seemed to notice was the pin on my hat. 'Santa's Favorite Helper' was emblazoned on it and even that little thing was enough to start the whispers when I walked away.

Lee and I played our roles as the good police force of the town though. Lee let kids sit on his lap and tell him what they wanted for Christmas, a few came to tell me to remind Santa what they wanted, and after awhile I had to shoo the kids off so Lee could get up and get some food before it was all gone.

"Thank ya darlin'," Lee sighed as we made our way to the buffet like set up of the food line. "Some of them kids were startin' to look like lil gingerbread men."

I laughed with him as he filled our plates and went to sit at a table to eat. We probably should have sat with other people, but at the moment I could tell that Lee needed a little break from others. So we sat together and he told me about the other people of the town, the ones I hadn't met yet. Knockemstiff became a whole lot more interesting during that conversation. All the drama of a small town was scandalous. Housewives who doubled as those back room sex workers, the pastor's son that ran off with the Pickens old farmhand, the sweet old lady in the walker who'd killed her abusive husband thirty years ago.

The more I learned about the people of this tiny town, the more I wondered how anyone could call a small town boring. This place was ripe with intrigue. Yet everything seemed to change when a woman I didn't recognize walked in. "Who's she?" I asked Lee as we were finishing up our last morsels of food.

He looked and his demeanor instantly dropped from 'jolly' to 'jilted'. "That'd be my ex-wife," he answered sourly.

I looked back to her and when she was clear of the crowd, Lee and I both got to see that she was very, very pregnant. I turned back to check on Lee, he looked sick. "I'm sorry, Lee," I said quietly.

He didn't get a chance to reply before the ex-wife in question approached us. "Good evenin' Lee," she said, all airy and light. He barely nodded in response, unable to even look at her or her protruding stomach. "I'm surprised to see you all dressed up," she commented.

"I did that," I interjected, trying to spare him from having to reply. "We bet on a game of poker and I won," I explained with a forced smile.

The conversation after that was strained even more and I got the distinct impression that she thought Lee and I were together now. I didn't know what Lee thought, or if he picked up on those vibes, but I certainly wasn't going to tell her otherwise. Besides, Lee deserved to have his ex think he was with someone so much younger than himself, even if I didn't deserve the sting of knowing it was a lie.

The second the opportunity presented itself, Lee practically ran for the doors. Not wanting him to be upset on his own, I followed him back to his cruiser. He told me to go back inside and enjoy my night, but that wasn't happening. I climbed in the passenger side of the cruiser and sat there until he sighed and got in, too. All the way back to the station he kept telling me I should have stayed, that there wasn't any reason for me to leave just because he did.

"Just cos I can't be a man about Florence movin' on don't mean you had to go and ruin your night over it, too," he muttered miserably as we entered the small building.

"You didn't ruin anything, Lee," I assured him. "I ain't really one for church and the possibility of her popping like a balloon all over the pews was too big a risk to take," I teased.

That actually got a small smile out of him as he headed to the dreaded coffee machine along the back wall and smacked it until it turned on, lamenting the diner being closed for the party as he waited for the pot to brew. He made his way to his office, grumbling and muttering things I couldn't quite make out, but I was sure they weren't things I would approve of him saying. I followed him and was proven right as he sat down and complained that he was too fat to keep a woman and a string of other grumbled complaints I could only partially make out.

It made me sad to see that he just so easily accepted and spewed such negative things about himself. I wondered what he would have been like if he'd been shown real love, if he'd been told how beautiful he was as much as he deserved to hear it. Maybe he wouldn't be so down on himself, maybe he'd have more confidence in himself rather than just the confidence his Sheriff's badge and police cruiser gave him.

Then it occurred to me that I could stop wondering and start being the person who worked to build up his confidence again. What was stopping me from telling him everything? My own silly fears of rejection? Worries of what the town gossipers would say? It wasn't like they were silent now and nothing had ever happened between Lee and I. So what the hell?

I got up and walked around his desk to stand next to his chair. He looked up at me and jokingly asked if I was going to sit on Santa's lap and tell him what I wanted for Christmas. It wasn't meant to be taken literally, but I took it as an invitation. I sat myself across his lap and put an arm around his shoulders, my other hand cupping his face as I brought his lips to my own.

"Lee, I think you're perfect." When he tried to protest, I kissed him again.

I pulled away from him, waiting for his next attempt to try and tell me I was wrong, or convince me otherwise but he didn't. He just looked at me; really looked at me. Trying to find some hint or tell that I was messing with him, that I was just being a jerk like some others in town. As if I'd be sitting in his lap, kissing him in the privacy of his office at the police station for some kind of a joke or cruel prank. He would find no such tells and when he realized that I was serious, he kissed me back.

Nothing else mattered at that point. I didn't care what he thought of himself anymore because I was going to make it my personal mission in life to make him see that he should love himself. Or at the very least like himself, even a little. It would take time, I knew that. Someone's self confidence couldn't be mended overnight, but I already spent almost everyday with him at work so it wasn't like I'd have to go out of my way to make it happen. I'd just have to stop censoring my thoughts.

I'd finally be able to tell him how good I thought he looked in that leather jacket he always wears, how his ass looked great in his uniform pants - especially when he bent over. I could tell him everything. From the tame stuff, like how I liked bringing him his coffee in the mornings or how he gave me butterflies when he'd smile and thank me for literally just doing my job, all the way to the dirty thoughts I'd had about him taking me on the hood of his cruiser, on his desk, on my desk...

"I always knew you were somethin' special," he said, pressing his forehead against my own.

I chuckled and gave him another peck on the lips. "I always knew kissin' you would be amazing," I replied.

"Thought about it before, have ya?" he questioned cautiously, but curiously. Like he was still afraid that I was going to pull the rug out from under him and start insulting him at any second, but he was still hopeful that I was serious.

I bit my lower lip, watching his eyes dart to them and his pupils grow just a smidge. "I've thought a lot of things about you, Sheriff," I confessed in a breathy tone, kissing my way to his neck and leaving a small hickie in my wake. "A lot," I emphasised, grazing my lips ever so softly against the shell of his ear.

He shook his head a little. "How could a beautiful, young thing like you think anything of... me." I could tell he was almost ready to say something insulting at the end there, but he caught the look in my eye and chose against it.

"You want me to tell you what I think about you, Lee?" I asked, implication clear in my tone. He nodded his head in assent. "Even if it's dirty?" His eyes widened and I gave him a little smirk. "Want me to tell you how many times my aunt almost caught me with my hand in my panties because of you?"

He gulped and his breathing hitched in this throat, eyes glazing over. I could practically see the vision in his head of me laying back somewhere with my fingers teasing my own clit, his name falling softly from my lips. The thoughts were arousing the both of us, and I started to feel his against my thigh. I was not subtle about the way I shifted so my leg pressed further into his hardening erection.

"How about the day you arrested that drunken idiot, Carl?" I offered. "When he tried to headbutt you, and you cuffed him and slammed him down onto the hood of your cruiser," I let the sentence trail off, biting my lower lip as he fit the pieces together himself; the appendage poking my leg got a little more insistent. I flexed my thigh against him and enjoyed to quiet grunt he gave. "I think there's a toy stuck in your pants, Santa," I teased coyly. "I hope it's the one I've been begging for."

Lee shook his head and from the expression on his face I could tell he was still warring with himself. He didn't want to believe my words, or maybe he couldn't believe that someone wanted him the way I did, but he couldn't stop his body from reacting as it was. His body betrayed him as his dick got harder. He didn't want to believe the words, but he clearly liked hearing them.

"I think you're going a little too far, darlin'," he said.

"Wanna bet?" I challenged.

I stood up in front of him and he watched as I reached up under my dress and pulled my panties down, sitting on his desk to take them off and holding them out to him. The crotch of them was wet and glistening with my arousal. I spread my legs for him, but kept my dress covering myself. "Take a look, Sheriff," I told him. "See what you do to me."

I'd never seen a man look so nervous before. The curiosity was clearly killing him though. His erection straining against his pants so bad I didn't know how they didn't burst at the seams. Finally scooting his chair forward he put his hands tentatively on my knees, watching my face intently as he slowly brought them up my thighs to the edge of my dress.

"A-are you sure?" he stammered, gaze flicking down to my waist for a second before returning to my eyes.

I twirled my panties on my finger in reply. The skirt to my dress was flicked up the next second, exposing my naked, wet core to him. When he finally looked, I saw his cock jump in his pants and it made me want him more. "Fuck you're gorgeous," he hissed. One hand was pressing into his erection, trying to control himself, and the other traced the rest of the way up my thigh; stopping just shy of where I wanted him most.

"You can do whatever you want to me, Sheriff," I purred seductively.

I was expecting his fingers, instead he leaned in and pressed his lips right to my clit. I moaned, encouraging him to continue and the second I felt his tongue on my folds I thought I was going to die. I laid myself back on the desk and let myself enjoy finally having his tongue on me, in me. And god did he know how to use it.

I didn't know when the last time he'd been with a woman was, he never mentioned dating or even sleeping with someone else in the entire time I'd known him, but clearly pussy eating was like riding bike because I was a panting, moaning, mewling mess beneath his mouth in what felt like seconds. When his fingers joined the mix it was moments before I gasped his name, shuddering with my climax as I came on his tongue.

There was no ceasing the actions of his tongue though. He rode me through that orgasm and I felt like we broke a world record for how long it lasted. I collapsed on the desk and it wasn't until then that he finally gave me a reprieve, and even then he still went back once more to kiss my clit, making me whimper. I lay in bliss until I heard the unmistakable sound of a belt coming undone. I sat up in a flash, watching as he removed his Santa coat, leaving him in a white t-shirt.

He looked to me as I sat up, the hint of a smirk playing at the edges of his mouth. "Excited for something, darlin'?" He asked.

I bit my lip and nodded my head, watching with rapt interest as he stood up. He towered over me as he pushed the waistband of his pants down and kicked them off his legs, leaving him in his t-shirt and Christmas tree covered boxers. I giggled at the latter, telling him I think he had a tree of his own hiding underneath the silly pattern.

"And what do you got hiding under that costume of yours?" He mused.

Oh, so this was a tit for tat game? Alright, I could play that. I pulled my dress up over my head, revealing my simple bra to him. I didn't have anything that qualified as sexy, but this was the newest bra I owned so it was at least in better shape than the ratty one I usually wore to work. Then before he could even reach for his own clothes, I reached behind me and unclasped my bra, peeling it off my body and setting it to the side.

I may have broken him with that, because he froze and just stared at me. I chuckled, reaching out to grab a fistful of his shirt and pull him closer. "See something you like, Sheriff?" I asked seductively, teasing my hands under his shirt to rub across the bare skin of his stomach.

The feel of him under my fingers was just about the best thing I could have imagined. It almost compared to the feeling of me pushing his shirt up and over his head, letting it fall to the floor. I didn't give him even a split second to be wary of what I thought of him practically naked in front of me, I just pulled him into a heated kiss as my hands went to his waist to rid him of his boxers. He moaned into my mouth as my hands found his member, rock hard and leaking for me.

"God Lee," I moaned, circling my fingers around his length and pumping them along his shaft. "You're so big." It wasn't even a lie to stroke his ego, he was a well endowed man and by far the biggest I'd ever gotten my hands on.

With that he scooped me up from the desk, making me squeak in surprise, as he took me to the couch against the far wall off his office. A spot usually reserved for visitors in a more delicate state, but then again what state was more delicate than naked and horny?

He laid me out on the couch, kneeling between my legs as he leaned over me, kissing me back into the cushions. I got comfortable, wrapping my legs around his waist and pulling him closer to my body. Feeling his heavy cock resting against my core made my hips rolls involuntarily. I needed to feel him against me, inside me.

"Please, Lee," I whimpered.

"Anything you want, darlin'," he whispered, reaching between our bodies to coat himself in my wetness before lining himself up with my entrance. "Just ask."

Part of me knew this was an consent check, but I also knew that it was for him, too. He wanted to hear me say the words, to have them spoken aloud so he knew he was wanted; craved. I stroked his cheeks with my thumbs, making him look me in the eyes before I spoke. When his gorgeous blues met my gaze, I smiled softly at him. "Please, Lee, will you fuck me?"

His answer was to push his hips forward, the tip of his cock slipping inside my walls as making me moan with the stretch. I moaned more as each new inch of him pierced my body until he was fully seated inside me. I gasped at the fullness, whimpering as he rolled his hips against me, pulling out just a little before pushing right back in to the hilt. Then he started to move in earnest, allowing my body to get used to his size, his girth.

He found a rhythm, fucking into me at a good pace but it wasn't enough. I needed more, I craved him fucking me back into this couch until we were practically the same entity. I clung to his biceps. "Harder," I begged. "Please, Lee, I need you."

It turns out that Lee was even more enthusiastic to please me than I thought, and simply by telling him the truth I managed to stroke his ego enough to make him confident in his actions. His pace picked up, his hips slamming into me with such force I didn't know how the couch didn't break beneath us. The wet sounds of him piercing me echoing around the room with the sounds of our moans, pants, and grunts. His head dipping to take one of my nipples into his mouth and I keened at the sensation of his wet tongue flicking over the hardening bud.

He'd barely moved to the other when I felt that fire in my belly condensing, building, readying to explode at any moment. "Yes, yes," I panted as he fucked me even harder still. His body pressing into my clit with every thrust, every roll of his hips until I came apart beneath him. My orgasm slammed into me as hard as he did and I nearly screamed with my release, soaking his cock and the couch beneath our bodies and still he did not stop.

"That's it, darlin'," he praised with a grunt as he continued to slam into me. "Cum all over my cock."

I didn't know where he pulled this confidence from, but I liked it. It suited him well. He deserved to be confident, deserved to always know he was powerful and sexy and capable of giving a woman exactly what she asked for. Already I could feel another orgasm building in my gut, my muscles clenching around his length as his own thrusts got sloppy, his pace faltering a moment before he picked it up double time.

"Oh, oh," I moaned, my shoulders pressing into the couch as my eyes squeezed shut from the pleasure. "Lee!" I yelled. "Oh god, Lee!"

With a body rocking shudder I came again, squeezing the hell out of his cock and feeling him release deep inside my body. I moaned again at the feeling, the pleasure of making him cum just as he took me apart again. After a final few thrusts, his pace finally stilled. He carefully withdrew from my body and I feel our mingled pleasure seep out of me; it was just about the sexiest thing I could imagine.

"Fuck darlin'," he swore, gently collapsing on top of me. His weight keeping me grounded as I felt like I was going to float right up to the ceiling.

I sighed with a moan of content, breaths coming deep and labored. "Oh my god," I breathed. "I told you, you were perfect."

He said nothing, just pressed his lips to my neck before sucking on the spot until I knew there'd be a bruise when he moved away. When he was done marking my neck, he kissed down my chest until he sat upright and just looked over my naked body. I picked myself up off the couch so I was sitting up with him, looking over his body as he'd looked over mine. He looked even more gorgeous like this, a post orgasm shine to him, his now limp cock still coated with my slick. It was the sexiest thing I'd ever seen, and I made sure to tell him I thought so. His reply was to lean forward and kiss me.

"Now, just 'cause you're fucking the Sheriff don't go thinking this means you can start slackin' on your duties," he teased.

My lips quirked into a smirk. "Oh?" I questioned. "I'm fucking the Sheriff, and not just fucked him?" I grinned hopefully, biting my lip.

"It's still hard to believe you'd want to," he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. "But I'd be a damn fool to deny anything you wanted, darlin'."

"What about you?" I asked. He cocked his head in confusion. "What do you want?"

Realization dawned on his face and he pulled me across the couch to him, stroking my face. "I want you," he answered. "I might not think I deserve ya, but that don't mean I don't want ya."

Hearing those words made my heart feel like it was flying higher than the moon. He wanted me. The man I'd had a crush on since I first saw him actually wanted me. It might have been silly to praise that after literally just having sex with him, but I wasn't some dumb school girl. I knew that sex didn't always mean something. Hell, I'd had sex in the past with people I didn't give a damn about, just because I wanted the pleasure. I was willing to risk that again with Lee, riding on the hope that maybe we could have more meaningless sex because of working together; but this was a game changer.

We cleaned ourselves up and the mess on the couch before redressing. The evidence might have been gone now, but I'd never be able to look at that couch the same again. Or Lee for that matter. When I looked to him now I didn't have to pretend I wasn't attracted to him, didn't have to hide my giant crush on the man. He knew and I was free to turn into a heart eyed fool without that fear of rejection that had been following me around until tonight. I could have sent his ex-wife a fruit basket.

Thinking of how the appearance of his ex made all of this possible made me start laughing, and Lee looked at me like I was crazy. "I'm sorry," I gasped, trying to stop my fits. "I was just thinking that if your ex-wife never showed up tonight, I don't know that I'd have ever told you how I felt."

Lee chuckled. "Well, looks like the woman finally did me a favor," he said, wrapping his arms around my waist and giving me that smile that I adored so much.

I snaked my arms around his neck. "She did me a favor a long time ago," I told him. "By being stupid enough to let a man like you go. A mistake I'll never make."

He kissed me again and there was only one thought on my mind.

I loved this tiny ass town.

#lee bodecker #lee bodecker fic #lee bodecker smut #lee bodecker x ofc #lee bodecker x reader #adventures with ana

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uelden · 3 years

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Vanity Fair interview translated

Just a side note before the actual translation; I don't know why, but instead of reporting the full questions and answers in full as she should, the journalist decided to report only summarized fragments of what Måneskin said and patch these fragments up into messy clusters. She also worded a couple phrases in a very confusing way (and yes, she's fully Italian). In short, she did quite a poor job, so the final shape of the interview is not that good. I didn't expect top-tier journalism from Vanity Fair but ffs. You'll see what I mean.

I translated it as it is, adding just a couple footnotes to give you insight on Italian pop culture references.

Translation under the cut

Måneskin: "Different from whom?"

by Lavinia Farnese, 09 June 2021

"True justice is being judged for what you do and not for what you are." The ones who are convinced of this are Damiano, Victoria, Ethan and Thomas who, by being the emblem of a generation that is finally free, refuse labels and conformism. In life, in love and on the stage. Where, maybe precisely because of this, they're winning everything

With the still unexpected (first place at Sanremo Festival) and the incredible (triumph at Eurovision) in their eyes, Måneskin are on the sofa of the house-studio they rented - to resume writing songs and rehearsing them - like you are after a won battle: lying in a calm and unreal silence, alert and a bit irreverent, happy.

In the garden there's the tennis table and the pool, the light of summer when it's starting and calming the country all around, and it filters inside from the large windows, and it goes onto the shining black of Ethan's hair, which blends with Thomas' eye shadow and the butterfly he has tattooed oh his naked forearm, which completes the picture of Victoria's golden crucifix hanging between neck and tank top and ends on the black nail polish of Damiano's stretched hands.

It's a human fresco, a Theatre of wrath [translator's note: "Teatro d'ira"] - to call it with the title of their latest album, a platinum record already - where their flaunted 20 years of age, their irregular femininity and virility are grown into proud and challenging custom, a pop glam rock generational manifesto of hard-earned liberties in a finally-unconditional expression of the self.

To watch them from any angle and from another age is to think that a great love will be born in those who'll understand: this new way of being in the world, the true and sovereign realm they hold where "diversity=exceptionality", the power of the artistic and cultural revolution of which they are healthy carriers in establishing in all lyrics and gestures the right to live according to one's own nature past the "people (who) talk, the people (who) unfortunately talk, and don't know what the fuck they're talking about." [tn: "Zitti e buoni" lyrics]

We go where we're afloat, where the air isn't gone. [tn: journalist's own variation on "Zitti e buoni" lyrics]

Miley Cyrus says hi – The numbers of a phenomenon

"The streams of Zitti e buoni are growing by the second, and they bring us above Muse, at the top of English charts, twelfth in the Spotify Global Chart. Followers almost tripled, in the post-Rotterdam period (from 1,4 to 3,3 millions, ed.) Contagious and universal folly: t-shirts and merchandising sold out in 10 minutes. Like the records, the tickets for a tour that keeps adding dates and expanding over geographic maps. They're contacting us even from some festivals were The Rolling Stones went." Thomas

"After the pretextual controversy over cocaine that France built against us, later disproven by my drug test, some graffiti popped up in Spain depicting me as a “No drugs” poster guy. Some tweets made us laugh: "Congratulations, Italy! I've never been more certain that four people have had sex with each other." Miley Cyrus started following us -You're great. -You guys are greater." Damiano

From the garage to the stars – Story of a flight

"It was only 2016, and we played in restaurants, in the streets, in via del Corso. Damiano without even a microphone, Thomas' guitar with wonky strings, Ethan was drumming on a cajón. During Rome highschools' sit-ins (Kennedy, Virgilio, Mamiani) we had our first confirmations and half-hours of celebrity, playing among those who criticized us and those who went "wow they're really cool." One of the rare times when they would have paid us – 50 euros each – we gave the money to the next band in the lineup so that they would make us play in their spot, later in the day, when there would have been more people. We had already realized how things worked. Visibility mattered more than money. And we still think that." Victoria

The intimacy of rock – Choice of a genre

"Music allows us the miracle of extending to others some very personal and private topics, sometimes even difficult and thorny ones. They are and they remain deeply your own, but at the same time they become a confession that reaches a wider audience, and in this passage that is alike a delivery, they find a place in you as well, a processing of them. You overcome them, you accept them. One second it's something aggressive, the next it's a ballad. Cathartic». Damiano

Against panic – The stage as therapy

"I've suffered a lot from anxiety and panic attacks, it's an issue I've worked on thanks to a psychotherapy course, my friends and my family. Playing helped me in not letting myself be paralyzed by my fears, not making myself limited in my private and professional life. I've learned to accept, to live with this side of myself. I don't hide it. I don't feel ashamed of it." Victoria

Analysis as necessity – Relying on someone saves you

"This belief that only madmen go to the psychologist is a widespread ignorance. No-one's born learned. [tn: common Italian saying] And it's often hard to understand the very reason why we're here, let alone the origin and direction of our desires. It's a long and legitimate journey towards lucidity, a kind of backing to become transparent." Damiano

Being out of our minds – But different from them [tn: "Zitti e buoni" lyrics]

"When you feel a strong passion towards something that is not a canonical job but an artistic language, that already puts you on a level of anomaly, which is not superior or inferior to other people, but it puts you in the position of the one who breaks the mold and also works at a loss, the one who sustains great risks while trying to do something that who knows if it will take you anywhere. "Why do it if it doesn't pay?". You want to give this dream of yours an aesthetic, but it becomes "You're dressing so weird! You must be gay!" - now that I'm 22 I laugh about it, but when I was 17 it had an effect on me, too." Damiano

The beauty of uniqueness – Of believing in it and defending it

"And I mean, at the end of the day if we're all different it's not because we want be alternative but because, really, no-one is the same. Justice is being judged on what you do and not what you are. Justice is equality, respect, beauty." Ethan

Fluid sexuality – Pride is freedom

"Heels for men that like themselves in them, kisses among ourselves, we have an open, extended mind, and we're proud of it. The horizons become vast, past the oppression of conservative families. With the information on the web knowledge becomes greater and with it the possibility that minorities will be less and less minorities, because the majority will be less of a majority. This way we'll make insults and bullying grow quieter. If social media get to a village of 50 souls and reveal to a girl who's afraid of the dark that someone has felt her same fear, then there's no reason to give a name to that fear, to mark it with labels which also limit and restrict. Definitions always had this effect on me. You shouldn't even consider the gender when judging someone, let alone their orientation." Victoria

Sexism – A culture to be dismantled

"Emma [tn: Emma Marrone, Italian singer] drops the bomb: “At Eurovision when I was there they massacred me for a pair of shorts, while they said nothing to Damiano – bare-chested and in heels.” The easy judgment against women is more fierce, constant, debasing (if I have a lot of sex I'm cool while Vic is a whore, where I show myself strong I'm a leader while Vic is despotic and a pain in the ass who reached success because she's hot.) As a male I'm privileged, the abuse I get is not comparable to those a woman has to live through, the comments over my aesthetic are centered only on my aesthetic and don't insinuate anything about my professionalism and my competence, while women are victims of this kind of thought in a systematic way. It happened though to find myself standing with a woman who while pulling me to herself to take a selfie, started licking my face out of the blue... I mean, what the hell do you want? Who asked you? Consent exists, and it's due." Damiano

Grow yourself – The only commandment

"To me conformism is the opposite of education [tn: could also mean "politeness"] and is the asphyxia of expression. I fortunately never endured heavy bullying, heavy enough for the the judgement of others to change me. But the mold of the small crumbs of bullying I got and of the kind of aggression that scars is the same. If I'm a kid who dances and likes dolls you have to let me do what I like. I was a kid who wanted to keep his hair long and played with Barbie. As a teen, my friends looked at my hair: " You have to find a girl with short hair to be at your side." My grandparents took away my dolls: "Stop it, they're not for you." Ethan

"When I was six I was already sick of them, the distinctions between masculine and feminine. I've always had strong ideas about how I wanted to be. I refused things that were typically defined as girly, and all around me they mocked me because I went skateboarding, I played soccer, I didn't wear skirts, I was giving myself the chance to be as I wished. I endured it a little, I suffered a little, but I had courage, and now thanks to that courage I know that I could have gotten even much more hurt, otherwise I would have left to others the most important choice: the one about myself." Victoria

Love in progress – Music, girlfriends

"I've been married to music for the last 20 years. I can't wait to celebrate our golden wedding anniversary." Ethan

"Everyone makes their own experiences, sometimes it goes well, sometimes it goes wrong, but it's always not anybody's business." Thomas

"When I first felt feelings and attraction towards a girl it was a bit disorienting because I had never had the courage of going beyond the limitations I had put for myself. For society being heterosexual is the norm and so you often define yourself in that way automatically, depriving yourself of the freedom to live many shades and faces of love. Once I overcame the initial insecurity of having to call into question my certainties I've lived my sexuality in a very natural and free way, as it should be for everyone." Victoria

"I had paparazzi at my door every day and night. So, after four years of relationship, I revealed her name. I still have paparazzi at my door every day and nigh, but at least I don't have to hide anything anymore." Damiano

The worth of the group – Phenomenology of protection

"The true engagement though, the true family is among ourselves, our band. We've believed in it since day zero, even before we called ourselves Måneskin (Moonlight in Danish), even before Ethan drew a giant moon on the flier for the first concert we ever did. We share everything, even the pain for the tragedy of Seid Visin, who committed suicide at 20 because of racism. [tn: I think the journalist asked them their opinion about Seid Visin's death, which was a current events topic in Italy, and then pasted it syntaxically in the middle of Thomas' answer, which was not a great move] A group is what we all should be: stay united and not back down an inch in the face of oppression that is generated by a distorted view of diversity." Thomas

I'm not of the right age – Like Gigliola [tn: Gigliola Cinquetti won Eurovision with her song "Non ho l'età", which means "I'm not of the right age"]

"Before you the only one who won both Sanremo and Eurovision on the same year was Cinquetti (1964). If there's anything I feel I'm not of the right age for? No, honestly no. Maybe having children. Regarding children I'll be honest: I'm not of the right age." Damiano

Having touched the sky – The fears that remain

"We're more than inside the dream, we're in the conquered dream. When you fly high there's the risk of plummeting and hurting yourself, but we'll work hard not to end up like Icarus, who burns his wings with the sun. Everything is in our hands. And this - a bit pretentiously - reassures us rather than scaring us." Damiano

#maneskin #måneskin #vanity fair #italian #translation

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mistressemmedi · 3 years

Text

Måneskin: "Different from whom?"

Greetings from Miley Cyrus - phenomenal numbers.

The streams of Zitti e Buoni are growing by the second, and ahead of Muse, on the top of the English charts, twelfth in the Spotify Global Chart. We almost tripled followers after Rotterdam (from 1.4 to 3.3 million, ed). Contagious and universal madness: T-shirts and merchandise sold out in 10 minutes. Like records, tickets for a tour that adds dates and expands on maps. They are even looking for us in festivals where the Rolling Stones have played. - Thomas

After the whole cocaine scandal that was started against us from France, which was later denied by my drug test, in Spain there people have been making murals with my face saying "No drugs". Some tweets made us laugh: «Congratulations, Italy! I have never been so sure that four people have fucked each other ". Miley Cyrus started following us. "You are great". “You are more” . - Damiano

From rags to riches - what a story

It was only 2016, and we were playing in restaurants, on the streets, in via del Corso (famous street in Rome). Damiano without a microphone, Thomas's guitar with broken strings, Ethan drummed on a cajón. At the occupations of the high schools in Rome (Kennedy, Virgilio, Mamiani) we had our first gigs and half an hour of fame, between those who criticized us and those who said "these guys are so cool". One of the rare times in which they offered to pay us to play - 50 euros each - we offered that money to those after us, in exchange for the chance to play during their time slow, as we knew there would have been a bigger crowd. We already understood then how it worked. That visibility was worth more than the money. We still think so ». - Victoria

The intimacy of rock - Choice of a genre

Music allows is this miracle which allows one to talk about very personal and private topics, even difficult and delicate ones. They are and remain deeply yours, but at the same time they become a confession that reaches a wider audience, and in this passage which is like a delivery, they also find their place in you, their elaboration. They are overcome, they are accepted. One moment it feels aggressive, one moment later a (soft) ballad. It's very cathartic. - Damiano

Against panic - The stage as therapy

I have suffered a lot from anxiety and panic attacks, it is a problem that I have worked on thanks to a course of psychotherapy, to my friends and family. Playing has helped me not to let myself be paralyzed by my fears, not to be limited in my private and professional life. I have learned to accept, to live with this side of me. I don't hide it. I no longer feel ashamed. - Victoria

This belief that only crazy people go to the psychologist is widespread ignorance. Nobody is born learned. And it is often difficult to understand why we are here, let alone the derivation and direction of our desires. It is a long and legitimate journey towards one's clarity. - Damiano

Essere fuori di testa – Ma diversi da loro (Be out of your mind - But different from them)

Already feeling a strong passion for something that is not a 'regular' profession but an artistic language, it puts you on a level where you're an anomaly, and while you're neither superior nor inferior to others, it places you in the condition of what breaks the mold but you're also being at a loss, leaving it to you to be bold and to take risks, hoping that they will pay off and land you somewhere. "What good is it if you don't stand out on your own?". You want to give it an aesthetic to your artistic dream, but to others it boils down to " You dress differently! You must be gay! ”, I'm 22 now and it makes me laugh, but at 17 it had an effect on me too. - Damiano

The beauty of being unique - Of believing in that and defending it

After all, we are all different not because we want to be alternative but because really no one is the same. Justice is being judged on what you do and not what you are. Justice is equality, respect, beauty. - Ethan

Fluid sexuality - Pride is freedom

We appreciate heels on men, we kiss each other, we have an open, extended mind, and we are proud of it. The horizons become vast, beyond the oppression of conservative families. With information on the web, knowledge is enriched and with it the possibility that minorities will be fewer and fewer, because majorities will be fewer and fewer. This will lower the volume to insults and bullying. If social networks can reach a village of 50 souls to reveal to someone, who is afraid of the darkness, that someone has felt that same fear.. There is no longer the need to give it a name, to define that "something" to fear, to brand it with labels that only limit you. Definitions have always had this effect on me. Gender should not even be considered in a person's judgment. Let alone orientation ". - Victoria

Sexism - A culture to be dismantled

Emma (Italian singer) dropped the bomb:" When I went to Eurovision, they insulted me over a pair of shorts. Damiano - half naked and in heels - was never criticized ". The judgment against women is constant, ferocious, and demeaning (if I have a lot of sex I'm cool but Vic a whore, where I show myself strong I'm a leader she is domineering and pain in the ass, who is successful because only because of her looks [and not the hard work she puts in]). As a male I am privileged, the harassment I suffer is not comparable to that experienced by a woman, the comments on my aesthetics are focused only on my aesthetics and do not insinuate anything about my professionalism and my competence, while women are victims of this kind of thinking in a systemic way. But I did find myself in a situation, out of nowhere, with someone who, pulling close to her for a selfie, started licking my face ... "What do you want, did you ask me?" Consent exists, and it is a must ». - Damiano

To grow as a person - The only rule to follow

For me, to conform is the total opposite of educating oneself, and the asphyxiation of one's expression (of freedom). Fortunately, I did not suffer heavy bullying, to the point where I felt I needed to change to adapt to how others saw me. But the matrix of who I am and the aggression that marks me is the same. If I'm a kid who dances and loves dolls, then allow me the freedom to do so. I used to be a kid who wanted long hair and played with Barbies. My friends, as a teenager, looked my long hair and teased me: "You have to find yourself a girl with a short hair to make up for it". My grandparents took the dolls away from me and said: “Stop it, they're not for you” ». - Ethan

“I was six and I already could not tolerate the distinctions between masculine and feminine. I've always had strong ideas about how I wanted to be. I refused things typically defined as feminine as a child, and they made fun of me for skating, for playing soccer, for not wearing skirts, for giving myself the chance to be as I wanted to be. I suffered a little, as I was bullied, but I had courage to stay true to myself, and today thanks to that courage I know that I could have been much more hurt, or I would have risked leaving the most important decision to others: the one about being just me". - Victoria

Love - music and girlfriends

I've been married to music for the past 20 years. I cannot wait to celebrate our golden wedding anniversary. - Ethan

Everyone goes through their own experiences, sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad, but it's never other people's business." - Thomas

When, for the first time, I developed feelings and attraction for a girl it was a bit disorienting because I had never had the courage to go beyond the limitations I had imposed on myself. For society, being heterosexual is the norm and therefore often one automatically pegs himself in that way, giving up the freedom to experience many different shades and facets of love. Once I got over the initial insecurity of having to question one's own certainties, I lived my sexuality in a very natural and free way, as it should be for everyone. - Victoria

I had paparazzi under my house morning and night. So, after four years of relationship, I finally revealed her name. I still have the paparazzi under my house morning and night, but at least I don't have to hide anything anymore. - Damiano

The value of the group - Protecting each other

But the real relationship, the real family, is between us. Our band. We believed in it from the first day, even before calling ourselves Måneskin (moonlight in Danish), even before Ethan drew a giant moon, on the poster for our first concert. We share everything, even the pain of the tragedy of Seid Visin, who committed suicide at 20 because he was a victim of racism. Being a group is what we should all do together: stay united and not retreat in the slightest in the face of abuses generated by a distorted vision of someone "being different|. - Thomas

Non ho l’età – like Gigliola (It references Gigliola Cinquetti who won both Sanremo and Eurovision with her song "Non ho l’età" which translates to Not old enough)

Before us, the only one to win Sanremo and Eurovision together was Gigliola Cinquetti (in 1964). Is there is something for which I feel I am not yet old enough for? No, honestly no. Maybe for kids. I'll be honest, I'm not enough to be a dad. - Damiano

Reached the sky - What fears still remain

We are more than in the dream, we have conquered the dream. To fly high this high, there is the risk is to fall and get hurt, but we will try not to end up like Icarus, who burns his wings with the sun. Everything is in our hands. And this - somewhat presumptuously - reassures us rather than frighten us ". - Damiano

(ORIGINAL INTERVIEW IN ITALIAN)

[Please note that I have changed some words or structure sentence, trying to make it so that the interview made more sense lol - I skipped the first two paragraphs, which was basically the interviewer gushing over how pretty the band is lmao (relatable).

Any mistakes in the translation are sorely mine, nothing was proofread, so apologies in advance]

#maneskin #ethan torchio #damiano david #victoria de angelis #thomas raggi #i'm off to drink some wine lol

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gubler-me-up · 4 years

Text

Broken Telephone

Request: Spencer Request. You're new to the team, having transferred from the NYPD and are also studying for a Doctorate at the same time. Spencer falls in love with you straight away, but saddens when he hears you talking to JJ about a guy you do a load of fun activities with a guy and a little girl. He assumes you're taken and it breaks his heart. Eventually, he finds out you were talking about your cousin and his daughter & asks you out on a date, and you say yes.

A/N: Thanks for the request, anon! This was a really cute, fun request to write! Starting it was tough though because I didn’t know the exact tone I wanted for it. I hope it’s okay though! When I was reading through the beginning part before I edited it I was like “I have a whole degree in English and I can’t even write properly i hate it here” LOL the first paragraph was a MESS but I fixed it. I think the rest is fine! Enjoy, love!!

Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader

Category: Fluff

Content warning: None

Word count: 1.7k

-------------

Upgrading from NYPD to the BAU was probably your greatest career move to date. You hated how NYPD operated and dealt with crimes. It made you so frustrated. If you weren’t born and raised in New York you wouldn’t even be a part of NYPD. You felt as if New York would always be your home, but sometimes you had to branch out to find what’s best for you.

Moving to Washington, D.C. was a completely new start for you and you felt as if it were only right you changed a few things about yourself. First, you cut your hair shorter. Very cliche of a restart arc, but you thought you’d feel free with less weight weighing your head down. You also bought an actual house. After years of living in a small, cramped apartment you thought it was right to invest in something bigger and more welcoming.

The biggest thing you were proud of during the transition to the BAU was finishing your Ph.D. in Linguistics. You had wanted to complete it years ago, but found it difficult to focus on it while at NYPD. With the bureau they allowed you to work on your Ph.D. as long as you worked your agreed-upon hours every week. It felt amazing to finally have a support net to motivate you towards your dreams.

You weren’t the only one excited about your Ph.D. though. Your coworker, Dr. Spencer Reid, couldn’t wait to see you during your time in to discuss your Ph.D. with you. As soon as you walked to your desk, he’d be the first one to greet you with a huge, lovable smile, rosy red cheeks and a sparkle in his eyes. You had never seen someone so animated over linguistics before. If you two weren’t talking about linguistics or random facts he would spurt out, the conversation was about you.

On one particular day though, the good doctor was running late to work. You were kind of disappointed you weren’t greeted with a daily dose of facts early in the morning. The second best thing happened when JJ walked towards your desk with two Starbucks coffees.

“Ugh, if I knew you a few years earlier, I would have married you before Will could ever dream to,” you said.

She laughed. “I don’t think Spence would allow that to happen without a fight. He’s been quite the busy bee around you.”

She handed you your drink as you pondered on what she said. Just maybe he had a slight crush on you. The way he expressed his interest was adorable for sure. You preferred his way of flirting over the typical sexualized pick-up lines many men in your life have used.

“Are you saying super-genius Dr. Spencer Reid has a crush on me? I won’t believe it until he runs some tests about your theory,” you said as you took a sip of your coffee.

“Maybe he’ll ask you out one of these days between statistics,” she said.

You smiled. “That would be nice. I just hope he doesn’t do it this weekend. Remember I told you how Adrian was visiting this weekend? He’s bringing the little one with him.”

“Oh, really? What’s their name?”

“Her name’s Rhea. She’s the cutest little thing ever.”

You pulled out your phone to look for a picture of them. You found a picture of the three of you from a few months ago before you left for D.C. You turned your phone to JJ and she instantly melted.

“Oh my gosh, she’s adorable,” she said.

You proudly smiled. “Right. She’s the cutest four-year-old I know. I think I was the happiest one in the room when I met her for the first time. Adrian was a puddle of tears and nerves from the reality of taking care of this little girl forever. He treats her like an absolute princess.”

“You both are lucky to have her in your lives. She looks like a ray of sunshine.”

“She is. We do so many fun things together. The last time we hung out we went to this trampoline park. This weekend we’re going to the food festival.”

“That does sound like a lot of fun. Maybe I’ll bring Will and the kids there.”

You were going to respond to JJ until you noticed Reid sitting at his desk which was diagonally across from yours. You hadn’t even noticed him come in at all let alone sit down to start his workday. He had already buried his nose deep into case files. JJ looked at Reid with as much confusion as you did. He was never quiet unless something was troubling him.

“No fact today for me, doctor?” You joked.

He looked up at you. He had no sparkle in his eye or a blush painted on his face. He looked disappointed. You were confused as to what made your chatty doctor become so mute.

“I just wanted to start these case files,” he said.

“You sure there isn’t anything wrong, Spence?” JJ asked.

“No, I’m fine. I just gotta finish these before Hotch comes in,” he said.

He then buried his face back into the file without uttering another word. You and JJ looked at each other. You were concerned there was something wrong, but JJ’s look said to leave it alone for now. You sighed and took another long sip of your coffee. You stared at him out of the corner of your eye. You hoped whatever he was going through he’d tell you eventually.

————

You packed your things up to leave 20 minutes ago, but stuck around your desk until you saw Reid also getting ready to leave. You wanted to inquire about his miserable attitude towards you. You noticed throughout the day he was normal with everyone else except you. When you tried to spark conversation, he would give you quick, to the point answers before he made a B-line back to his desk. He gave you no choice but to crack him.

As soon as you saw him put his books and files into his satchel. He swung the strap around his shoulder and made his way to the door. He didn’t even look at you the whole time he got ready to leave. This was getting ridiculous to you. You picked up your purse and ran towards him before he caught the elevator.

“Spencer,” you called out.

He turned to look at you. “What’s up?”

You looked at him confused. “What’s up with me? What’s up with you?”

He furrowed his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but you haven’t talked to me or even looked at me longer than a second today.”

“I’ve been busy.”

“You weren’t too busy to tell Morgan how many microscopic mites were living on his face today.”

“I thought it was valuable information he needed to know.”

“And you didn’t think it would be valuable to tell me?”

“In the moment, no.”

He went to go press the button for the elevator but you stopped his hand. You grabbed his hand tightly to make sure he didn’t escape your grip. He looked at you as if he was uncomfortable with you touching him. You knew awhile ago he had thing about not liking to shake hands, but you had stepped over that barrier with him a long time ago.

“I don’t think you should be doing this,” he quietly said.

You furrowed your eyebrows. “Why not?”

“I feel as if I’ve been intruding,” he said.

“Intruding on what?”

“Your family life.”

You let go of his hand as you stood there in shock. You didn’t understand what he meant when he said that. If he wanted to ask you out all he had to do was ask and you’d sort out your schedule. Adrian and Rhea would understand if you took a few hours to go on your first date in over two years.

“You think you’re intruding on my family life? How so?” You asked.

“If you really want to know I wanted to take you to the food festival this weekend because I know how much you love unique foods, but then I heard you and JJ talking about your partner and daughter coming this-“

“Hold up, wait,” you said before bursting into an uncontrollable laugh.

He looked at you funny. You watched as he stared in confusion as you laughed at his interpretation of your conversation with JJ. To be fair you had never mentioned Adrian and Rhea to him before, but you didn’t know he’d be eavesdropping in your conversation with JJ.

“You think Adrian’s my partner and Rhea’s my kid? Well, I’m proud to say that for once in Dr. Spencer Reid’s life he is completely, utterly wrong.”

“What?”

“Yeah, Adrian’s my cousin and Rhea’s his daughter. They’re coming to visit me from New York for the weekend. Adrian’s basically like a big brother to me.”

His face went from confused to embarrassed in a fraction of a second. His face turned to that noticeable red and an awkward smile spread across his face. You continued to laugh at his demeanour as you pressed the elevator button, so the two of you could actually get going.

“Oh. I’m so sorry for being weird to you, Y/N. I just felt terrible for thinking about asking you on a date while you were in a committed relationship,” he said.

“I get it, I do. I think you can make it up to me though,” you said.

The elevator dinged and the two of you stepped inside. He looked at you in amusement. You looked back at him with a big smile on your face and big, hopeful eyes. He couldn’t help but laugh.

“Would you like to go on a date?” He asked.

You nodded your head. “I’d love to. We can even go to the food festival, so you can meet Adrian and Rhea in person.”

“That would be nice. I heard you telling JJ how lovely they are.”

“I bet they seem even lovelier now that you know they’re not my partner and child.”

“You can say that.”

—–

MASTERLIST

#spencer reid #dr. spencer reid #dr.spencer reid #Spencerreid #Criminal Minds #criminalminds #Criminal Minds Fanfiction #criminal minds imagine #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fluff #mgg #mgg imagine #Matthew Gray Gubler #spencer reid request #spencer reid prompt

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ramblesanddragons · 3 years

Text

Under The Moonlight

(For @lemonfodrizzleart based on her wonderful Mystery Farm AU mixed with Monster Falls. I really like Jackie as an OC and I hope I did her justice. A little treat for the spooky season. Normally I believe Gargrunk Stan can’t fly but maybe in this dimension he can!)

Words: 1967

Warnings: None! Just some fluff with a little bit of feels.

As the sun set low in the October sky Stan was trying his best to put on something nice. The wings were making it a little difficult. Maybe it would be easier to go shirtless than mess up a good flannel, but he wanted to look nice. Jackie was looking forward to this, he wasn’t going to let her down.

With a little fashion help from Kelvin, Stan was able to get his wings through some neatly cut holes. His tail wiggled into the hole in his jeans after a few tries. Shoes were a no go but at least his hat could rest in-between the horns on his head.

Getting ready for a date had never been so frustrating.

It was worth it though when he saw the smile on Jackie’s face. She was floating down the stairs, well more like fluttering. Even with all the draw backs of being a monster Jackie was enjoying being able to fly. The past few days she’d practically flown all over the farm.

Her dress was an off the shoulder affair in a deep black. A bit too fancy for a moonrise picnic but it was probably easier to deal with than anything else because of her own wings. He thin tail poked out of the bottom of the dress. Stan didn’t really care if it was too fancy. She looked incredible.

“Ready?” She asked.

Stan motioned to the blanket and basket in his hands and Jackie looped her arm around his stony one. Ford looked up from his notes. He was currently measuring the size of Kevin’s ears. It was only due to the golden fur covering his face that his twin wasn’t blushing up a storm being that close to his crush.

“You two be careful. I’m not sure how well any of the town folk would react to seeing you.”

“Look I’ve been planning this date for a week, Ford. No little monster curse is going ta stop us. You shouldn’t let it stop you either.”

Ford gave Stan a look that said, “Shut the hell up!” while Kelvin was distracted with the bone left over from his steak. Out of all of them he was rolling with this monster thing the best and seemed to embrace his wolfish side. Ford was indulging in riddles more but most of his focus was trying to find a cure. His twin needed to take a break before he burnt himself out. The occasional accidentally catnap wasn’t enough.

Stan could bother Ford to relax later. For now, he’d let him study Kelvin in peace. Maybe it would get him to finally ask him out. The official couple squeezed out the door with a wave and began to walk out into the orchard.

If this curse wasn’t lifted by next week, the fall apple festival they held each year would be turning into a costume festival as well. Sure, folks around town were used to the weird but even they had their limits. That was something for next week Stan to worry about. Right now Stan wanted to put all his attention on Jackie.

Jackie, who was also barefoot, would hop every few feet trying to catch a breeze. When she did, she’d flutter around the tops of the trees for a bit and return with a handful of apples.

“Honey, tonight’s ‘posed to be about relaxing.”

“Oh, I know. It’s just annoying to do it in the daytime. Sun hurts my eyes,” she explained. The picked apples were placed in bags and left by the trees. They could pick them up on the walk back.

“At least you can go out in the sun,” Stan grumbled.

Jackie gave him a sympathetic peck on the cheek and his grumbling morphed into a happy purring noise.

“It’s so cute when you do that.”

“Yeah, yeah just don’t tell Ford.”

She laughed and fluttered around the trees some more before they reached their picnic spot. The hill at the end of the orchard was silhouetted by the harvest moon. Maybe he needed to take Jackie on night dates more often. It was beautiful.

The two of them settled their blanket down and began to eat. Stan wasn’t as good of a cook as Jackie, but he had made the fanciest sandwiches he could with homemade sides. Every item had a somewhat ridiculous amount of meat in it to satisfy his new carnivore diet, but Jackie didn’t mind.

The two of them ate and talked and laughed. Stan offered her a blanket when the wind blew but Jackie declined.

“Apparently demons don’t get cold. It’s nice.”

“You know you might look like a demon, but I think of you as an angel baby.” Stan said with a smile. The smile faltered as Jackie laughed.

“How long have you been wanting to use that one? Very smooth lover boy,” she teased.

“Hey, I just wanted to let you know that I love you no matter what you look like! Yeesh. I try to be sweet.” He rolled his eyes playfully before remembering that no one could tell when he was rolling his eyes anymore. His eyes were currently glowing orange orbs.

Jackie’s eyes had a reddish cat in the dark like gleam to them. They were staring deeply at him. “I appreciate. At first, I was a bit weirded out by being turned into a succubus of all things, but you haven’t made me feel weird or different. I appreciate it.”

“Of course. You’re amazing no matter what you look like.” Stan wrapped a stony arm around Jackie, and they sat and watched the stars for a few minutes.

“Hey. I just got a great idea. We should take advantage of this who demon and gargoyle thing while we can,” Jackie said playfully.

Stan gulped. “Well, I haven’t really pushed any ideas since I didn’t want you thinking that you being a succubus would effect anything. I love you for more than that and-”

“Let’s go flying!”

“That...that is not what I thought you meant.”

“Oh, that can happen later. I know you’ve had a hard time keeping your hands off me.” Jackie winked and hopped-up leaving Stan slack jawed in the dirt. She laughed and stretched her wings wide.

“I think we could get some good air from here but maybe we should head up on the cliffs.”

“I don’t think I can fly. Too heavy,” Stan said.

“I bet you can. If your furball and feathers of a twin can, so can you. Although just in case we probably shouldn’t start with the cliffs. Let's try from here.

The hill wasn’t high enough to set off Stan’s heights fear, but it was one of the best places to sled on the farm. With the right wind it could be enough for a decent take off as Jackie was proving. She ran a few feet and stretched her wings, diving down to catch speed then turning up. She whooped happily as she climbed higher and higher. It almost looked like she could touch the large moon.

“Come on baby you can do it!” She shouted from the sky.

Stan gulped. He took a deep breath and went down the hill at a run. He jumped like he saw Jackie do but then tumbled head over tail down the rest of the hill. As he finally rolled to a stop Jackie landed beside him.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah. Hard head remember.” For emphasis Stan tapped his head and it made stony thumping noise.

“How about I do it with you? That might help.”

“Jackie I... there’s something I haven’t told you.” Stan frowned, he hated admitting it. “I’m afraid of heights.”

Jackie tilted her head in confusion and then something clicked. “That’s why you get Ford to do anything that involves a ladder! That’s why you like to use the apple picking tool instead of climbing!”

“Yeah. Pretty pathetic huh.”

“Of course not! Being afraid of heights makes sense! It’s not like humans can fly...normally that is. I just can’t believe we’ve been together this whole time and I didn’t realize it.”

“I did my best to try and hide it.”

Jackie petted his head causing him to purr again. Her claw like nails made a scratching noise against his stone skin. “Don’t be afraid to tell me you’re afraid Stan. I know you got it in your head you’re supposed to be this tough, sturdy guy-”

“What gave you that idea?” Stan asked in faux offense. Jackie shot him a look and gestured to his gargoyle body. He chuckled and let Jackie finish her thought.

“What I was trying to say is that it’s okay to be afraid and all those other human things. You don’t have to put on an act for me.”

Stan’s smile faltered and he took Jackie’s hand in his. “...I know.” Logically he knew that but there were times he could still hear his pa’s voice in his head telling him to be a man. Men weren’t afraid of things. Men didn’t have feelings. Men were tough as stone. That wasn’t the kind of man he was though, deep down, despite his current appearance. Sure, he was tough, but he felt all these other feelings too and he didn’t want to deny them. It was just hard sometimes. He was thankful to whatever above that Jackie was patient with him about it.

They sat at the bottom of the hill until Stan’s head finished spinning. Then he hauled himself up.

“Let’s try again.”

“Stan, you got nothing to prove.”

“I know that but when am I ever going to have a chance like this again. With luck these wings are gone within the week.”

He trudged back up the hill and watched how Jackie took off running and caught the fall breeze in her wings. She swooped up and flapped her wings hard to get higher and higher. Waiting until the wind picked up again Stan charged down the hill on all fours. As dumb as he felt it worked and he was able to feel a lift on his body. He beat his wings as hard as he could and the ground under him disappeared. The sudden disappearance of the ground spooked him, and he stopped flapping. His stone body went tumbling again.

“Stan!”

“I’m okay. I almost got this. Stay there!”

Determined he tried one more time. This time the wind was with him as a strong gust rolled across the orchard sending leaves and some apples flying. He flapped with all his might and didn’t panic this time when he took flight. His body was heavy. He could feel the strain in his back from the effort, but it was worth it to see Jackie’s delighted face.

“How are you doing?” She lowered herself down a few feet to meet him where he was steady.

“Alright if I don’t look down or think about being 20 feet in the air.”

“Come on! Just keep your eyes on me.” She took Stan’s hand and together they started to soar through the starlit sky around the farm. As terrifying as it was it was also beautiful. The two of them danced in the sky for as long as Stan’s wings could hold him.

Landing was tricky but when they made it back to their picnic spot Stan managed to stay on both feet despite tripping. He was even able to catch Jackie in his hands as she landed.

“That was amazing,” she said breathlessly.

“You’re amazing,” Stan responded.

“You might not agree with that after this. Tag you’re it!” She yelled pushing him slightly. She took off into the air again.

“Hey now hold on!” Stan laughed and shouted after her, taking off into the sky again.

#Gravity Falls #My writing #Monster Falls AU #Mystery Farm AU #Stan Pines X OC

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argonavis-hcs · 3 years

Note

c-could I maybe...request....Haruka 😳....maybe with an s/o who....is really kind to the point where people abuse their help...haha jk!!...unless...? 😳

Haruka with an Overly Kind s/o

Note: Anon... let me just say that you're a genius. THANK YOU SM FOR REQUESTING THIS! I HOPE YOU LIKE IT!!!

Pairing: Haruka Nijo x gn!reader

Genre: fluff

Warnings: mild language/swearing, MENTIONS OF EXAM (that can be pretty scary), grammar error hehe

Being a student in a prestigious school wasn't easy, especially when you participate in many school activities and being known as that student who is reliable by many.

"Y/n, can you please take these documents to the teacher's room? I... have a basketball practice soon." Said one of the student council in the room, putting stacks of paper in front of your desk while you were just about to go to your next activity after a long day at school. You yourself are a part of student council due to your parent's demand, and you've finished your student council task of the day. All you could think of was the food you want to buy at the store before going to cram school, which, again one of your parent's demand. It felt like keeping everything in balance had been a trouble lately.

Now, now, where were we? Oh, friend in trouble. You can't really refuse a friend in need, can you?

"Of course. Good luck at practice." You smiled, taking the heavy stacks of paper on your way out. Just what are these papers anyway? Why so heavy..

A sound from your pocket startled you from your thought, alerting you of a new message that just arrived.

✉ Haruka: Where are you? I've been waiting at the gates for 20 minutes so hurry up already.

"Crap- I forgot he was going to walk with me," you murmured as you were about to replied to his text, but there was a call of your name distracting you.

"y/n! Thank God you're still here. Wait!" Someone shouted from the hallway and you discovered it was a boy from your neighboring class. He approached you with a bag on his back, it looked like he's about to head home.

"Hey, what are you doing? Why aren't you home yet?" He asked as he starts walking beside you.

"Oh, I need to get these to the teacher's room and then I'll go to cram-school. What about you?"

"How unfortunate... Could you maybe skip just this one time? I need your help for the upcoming test tomorrow. I promise I'll treat you lunch if you say yes. And dinner too at my house after you tutor me. What do you say?"

Well, It's not that you don't want to, you never skipped before but you're also tight on lunch money and Haruka is currently waiting for you, "I-I don't know..."

"Please? There's no one who can tutor as efficient as you. I'll even double your lunch, c'mon"

"You see–" You were interrupted by a notification of another text– no, it's a call this time, you answered it without seeing the name being shown. "Hello?"

"Y/n, could you revise the proposals on upcoming school festival once more? The school staff seemed displeased for some reason." It's the Vice-President.

As long as you could remember, you were not in the position to revise such document, you were simply a treasurer, not secretary. "B-But I'm not the secretary, shouldn't you ask her instead?"

"She was angry when I asked her to revise it and now wouldn't answer my call, you know how she acts," he replied dryly. "The school give us time until tomorrow to finish it, I'll send you the files in the mo–" He didn't get to finish his sentence because your phone was snatched from your hand.

"It's a no, asshole. Why don't you do it like a good student council do? Now don't call them again." Haruka pressed the red button and put your phone in his back pocket.

He glared at the student beside you, "I don't care what your business with them," he took the papers out of your hand and gave them to the student. "Now fuck off." And ran off he did. Students in this school know better than to mess with Haruka.

In shocked with what just happened, you just stood there, deadpaned. Yet he wasted no time to grab your wrist, dragging you towards the exit. "What the fuck did i always tell you? Stop saying yes to their stupid request."

"Including yours?" You said automatically

"T-That's different... S-Shut up!" He hissed and you only giggled in response. It's rare to see him acting like this, he usually gets all grumpy when you don't have time for him because of those 'stupid requests' as he put it but that's all. It's the first time he ever took action to stop you from helping other students.

You'd be lying if you say it doesn't make you feel warmth inside. 80% of your tiredness officially gone after a single not-so-polite gesture from him. "Thank you, Haruka."

----------------------------------------------------

"I still think this is not a good idea, Haruka."

Sure, the dusk sky looks beautiful from the park bench both of you currently sitting at, but the fact that you're sacrificing your cram-school schedule for this is a bit of a strange feeling. And you still couldn't believe he finally managed to hide from his twin brother and chaffeur just to eat ice cream with you, without caring about your today's schedule.

"How's this gonna affect your grades?" He's already eating the second cup of ice cream he bought, "If it makes you feel better, i'll give you my test sheet since i've done it last week."

"That's not what i mean," your hand reaches inside the plastic bag to find any snack you could get. "I've never ditched before."

"Yea, you're welcome."

"My mom is gonna kill me if she finds out i ditch."

"Just tell her you're studying with me."

"I'm not ready for biology test tomorrow."

"You can handle it."

"Not as good as you."

Haruka sighed, "if you want me to tutor you, you can just say so," another spoon of ice cream into his mouth. "Although, my house won't be a good choice to study."

The thought of him in your room sends your heart to beat faster and makes you blush all of the sudden. It won't be the first time for him to tutor you or studying together in general but you've always done it in a small café or a quiet library where his twin won’t find out.

"N-No, you don't have to," you stammered. "I'll manage, like you said."

"Alright."

"I'm a genius after all." You proudly joke with him.

"You're getting noisy."

"And you're getting chubby after eating too many ice cream."

There were times where you liked to tease him to see how far his patience would go when it comes to you.

The silence are often not a good sign...

Looks like it's time to run

#aaside #argonavis #epsilon phi #epsilon phi x reader #haruka nijo x reader #haruka nijo #this is so cute help #fanfiction

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hiccanna-tidbits · 3 years

Photo

So I woke up at 4 am last night and my brain went “What if Jackunzel...but sapphic???”

aND HERE WE ARE

Also look, yes, I know Jackie/Jacquelyn Frost is the go-to when it comes to fem!Jack Frost names, but I just...didn’t think it suited her??? I wanted something a bit more unique, and I liked the sound of Jaina! And then I got very inspired and wrote a ficlet, so ENJOY SOME LESBIAN JACKUNZEL

DON’T TELL ME THEY WOULDN’T BE THE PUREST FUCKING SAPPHICS YOU’VE EVER SEEN IN ALL YOUR LIFE

The first time Rapunzel met Jaina Frost, she asked her if she was a fairy.

She certainly looked like one of the winged creatures from Rapunzel’s storybooks. She floated just off the ground and could flit around the room quicker than a hummingbird. Her hair whipped around her in long white tendrils, thick waves like hills of freshly-fallen snow. It shone like it, too--nearly blindingly when the sun hit it, Rapunzel noticed.

She could ice up the entire floor with one sweep of her staff and would whoop and cheer and laugh so hard she snorted when she slid around on it on her bare feet. All behavior Mother would find very undignified, Rapunzel was sure.

Not that Jaina had ever cared in the least about dignity.

She’d nearly fallen out of the tower window when she first saw Rapunzel poised to hit her with a frying pan. Her next reactions had been even stranger--hooting and doing flips and jumping around because apparently, people didn’t normally see her.

It was nice to have a friend. Mother hadn’t warned Rapunzel off of other girls, although Rapunzel was certain that in practice she wouldn’t approve of them. Not that it mattered. They quickly found that Jaina was as invisible to Gothel as she apparently was to everyone else.

Perhaps it was selfish, but Rapunzel liked that. She had Jaina Frost all to herself.

Jaina gasped in horror when she heard Rapunzel had never touched snow. Her hammy overreaction only got more and more ridiculous as Rapunzel explained she had only ever seen winter from the confines of her tower--and Mother usually shut the window to keep the cold out, anyhow. Jaina clutched her heart at this, pretending to faint in her despair.

“Well, if you won’t just leave and go outside, like I keep telling you you should...” Jaina crossed spindly arms and glared at Rapunzel. “I guess I’ll have to bring the winter to you.”

And bring it she does. When Mother won’t be back until evening, Jaina swirls together soft, cotton clouds and makes it snow in Rapunzel’s room. They make snow angels on the floorboards and toss snowballs at one another from behind dressers and wardrobes and chairs, giggling all the while. Rapunzel’s decided she’s going to blame any water stains left behind on some kind of flooding.

Mother won’t be mad over that sort of thing. She’ll just fuss over her and breathe a sigh of relief when Rapunzel can still sing as beautifully as ever.

When Rapunzel’s birthday rolls around, she confides to Jaina about the floating lights. She’s pushing 18, and she still hasn’t left the tower. Jaina fixes her with a catlike smirk, and turns away.

When she sweeps her hands back, she’s holding some kind of ice-blue cylinder, made of swirling crystals and snow with a crescent moon etched on the side.

“They’re lanterns,” Jaina explains. “The kingdom does a festival with them every summer. I’ve flown over it plenty of times. I could...”

Jaina looks away, and Rapunzel could swear she sees her friend’s cheeks go a little pink.

“I could take you. You know. If you wanted.”

Rapunzel shakes her head. “I can’t. You know Mother would...”

Jaina groans and rolls her eyes. “You’re really way too beholden to that woman, Rae. But if you insist on staying...I might be able to do something almost as good.”

And so they sit on Rapunzel’s windowsill, legs dangling over the side (Jaina can catch Rapunzel if she falls), and Jaina Frost puts on a show. She makes dozens of frozen lanterns and whisks them into the sky, and they float and bobble and catch first the dying rays of the sunset and then the soft silver of moonlight.

Rapunzel’s never seen something so beautiful in all her life.

She glances over at Jaina once, and she’s looking at the blonde girl like she sprinkled all the stars across the night sky the same way she dappled them onto her tower walls. Jaina looks away almost immediately, face reddening.

After a while, Jaina takes to spending the night. It was by accident the first time--the girls were up late having stupid pillowfights and telling each other stories in Rapunzel’s bed, and at some point they both started to yawn.

Before she knew it, Rapunzel was waking up with a faceful of white waves smelling vaguely of wintergreen, cedarwood, and cashmere sweaters. Her arms were curled around a thin, sleek waist, and she felt her heart speed up tenfold.

She had no idea why being so very close to her best friend was making her incredibly nervous, but here she was.

It’s the first of many nights they’ll wake up wrapped up in each other. Always, they claim, by accident--but neither ever seem to mind.

It becomes a routine of sorts. Rapunzel wakes up early and untangles herself before she has to give too much thought to the nervous sweat that nearly breaks out at every point of contact. She tries to get Jaina up too to help with morning chores, and Jaina rolls onto her stomach with her face in the pillow and whines and bitches and moans until Rapunzel relents and lets her sleep for 10 more minutes.

As she sweeps the floor, Rapunzel tries not to think too hard about the placid expression on Jaina’s face as she sleeps. As she mops, she tries not to think too hard about the way Jaina’s face scrunches up when she’s having a nightmare, and the way it makes Rapunzel want to wrap herself around the other girl like a protective shell. As she polishes the staircase banister, she tries not to think too hard about the way Jaina’s eyes shine like sunlight on icicles when her entire face erupts into a grin.

It’s probably peculiar, thinking about your best friend in such excessive detail.

Two years pass, and Rapunzel is pushing 20. When she looks in the mirror, she notices nothing seems to be changing. She doesn’t look any older than when she first met Jaina. Maybe the changes are just too imperceptible for her to notice, but 17-year-old Rapunzel seems to be stuck in a kind of limbo.

She wonders if it has anything to do with her magic glowing hair--the hair that makes her mother’s wrinkles disappear whenever she sings a special song.

She knows it should alarm her, not aging. Instead, she feels a strange kind of relief. There are worse things than being stuck as the same age as Jaina Frost.

There are worse things than not having to grow old and leave Jaina behind.

They’re lying in Rapunzel’s bed one afternoon, the blonde girl sprawled on top of Jaina to carefully brush on eyeshadow. It’s an elaborate picture--a beautiful deep twilight blue sprinkled with intricate snowflakes and rimmed with glittery white snow.

Rapunzel is the only one who will ever see it, but they’re both all right with that.

The eyeshadow is long done by now, Rapunzel getting carried away painting snowflakes and icicles and tiny pine trees on snowbanks dancing across Jaina’s cheeks and forehead. She smiles proudly and holds up a hand mirror. Jaina just snorts.

“You’re going to make me look like a clown, Rae.”

“Hmmmm.” Rapunzel puts the mirror down and continues adding a gleam to a white icicle on Jaina’s temple. “A very pretty clown.”

“You...think I’m pretty?”

Jaina’s gaze turns oddly serious. The timid way she asks it is unlike her.

Rapunzel stops, frowning. “I mean...yes. I always have.”

“Why?” Jaina wrinkles her nose. “I’m a mess. My hair’s always all over the place, and I can’t keep a room clean to save my life. All I can do is make ice, blow cold wind around, and leave a fucking wreck wherever I go. Why would you think I was...?”

“Jaina! Language!” Jaina just rolls her eyes.

“You don’t give yourself enough credit.” Rapunzel smiles again. “These have been the most fun years of my life, thanks to you. You stuck around here with me, even when you have the whole world to explore, and I can’t even imagine how boring it must seem in this tower. That’s worth more than you know. And for the record, I think you’re gorgeous.”

Jaina’s cheeks turn redder than chrysanthemums, standing out starkly against her pale skin. “Oh, stop it,” she mumbles. “I look like a gremlin next to you. World’s nicest hair, flawless skin, the face of some kind of Greek goddess or something. You’re a knockout. I couldn’t even hope to measure up.”

“You...think I’m a knockout?” Rapunzel feels a blush of her own coming on.

“Well, yeah.” Jaina smirks. “I thought it went without saying.”

“Nothing really ‘goes without saying’ when you’ve only ever met two people,” Rapunzel points out.

“I guess.” Jaina shrugs. “I forget you don’t have a huge frame of reference. But trust me, ask anyone from that kingdom on the other side of the forest and they’d say you’re really attractive. I doubt any passing knight on a steed would be able to resist you, if they saw your hair hanging out the window like some...cascading sunshine waterfall.”

Rapunzel bit her lip, feeling unsettled by the thought of men on horseback finding her tower. She’d never met a member of the male gender before, and she hadn’t exactly heard good things.

“I don’t know if I want that,” she admits.

“I don’t blame you,” Jaina says. “Half of them are stuffy, arrogant pricks, anyways. Or they’re so sappy and poetic it kind of makes you want to throw up.”

Rapunzel bites her lip, feeling nothing but mild discomfort at the thought of a strange man trying to serenade her. Maybe it wasn’t fair to rule out what she didn’t know, but...

“No, I mean. I don’t know if I want men. Like...at all.”

“Oh. Oh.” A hopeful gleam swims into Jaina’s ice-colored eyes. Tiny, almost imperceptible, but there.

“Wise choice, honestly,” she says nonchalantly. “Even being invisible, I haven’t met many I actually cared to know. I think I’d much rather be here with you.”

Rapunzel wonders if Jaina would feel the same if any men could see her. She wonders if Jaina would still choose her company if some free-spirited, energetic boy was able to see the frost sprite, and wrote her beautiful sonnets about her moon-white hair. Some boy not stuck in a tower with an overbearing mother, some boy who couldn’t hold her back.

The thought fills Rapunzel with an unexpectedly bitter wave of jealousy.

She shakes it off, reaching into the makeup kit beside her and feeling around until her fingers curl around a tube of lipstick. She smiles, pulling it out.

Jaina groans in mock annoyance. “Are we still doing this? Aren’t I going to look ridiculous?”

“Not at all.” Rapunzel uncaps the lipstick and gently slides it across Jaina’s mouth.

The blonde girl leans back and admires her handiwork. She holds the mirror up to Jaina again.

Her lips are a bright, icy blue, like the glaciers Rapunzel can only ever hope to know through the pictures in her books. Slowly, Jaina smiles.

“You look like you could deliver the kiss of death,” Rapunzel teases. “Freeze your true love on the spot instead of awakening them from eternal slumber.”

“Want to test that out?”

Jaina smirks, voice surprisingly bold. Rapunzel can’t help but notice the pink rushing to her friend’s cheeks, though, despite her best attempts to sound casual.

“Huh?” Rapunzel frowns down at her, confused.

Jaina’s smirk shrinks a little, the first traces of fear darting into her eyes.

“Only one way to figure out whether I actually carry the kiss of death.” Jaina shrugs, still trying to seen nonchalant but voice not nearly as confident as before.

“Ah.” Rapunzel smiles playfully. “But if it works, you’ll have to find a new best friend, won’t you? Sounds like a lot of trouble for you.”

“That’s okay, Pascal will just be my new best friend if I kiss you to an early grave!” The chameleon squeaks disapprovingly from the dresser nearby.

“Come on, Rae,” Jaina says. “I really have to know. The curiosity’s killing me here.”

Rapunzel can feel Jaina’s breaths against her own chest, quick and shallow. Scared, almost.

Jaina is a lot more nervous than she’s letting on.

Still, looking down at the curve of Jaina’s lips and the unfailingly cheeky gleam in her eyes, everything suddenly feels just right.

Rapunzel slides her arms onto either side of Jaina’s head. She leans down, and captures Jaina’s lips with her own.

She tastes cold and sweet--like frosty vanilla and mint chocolate chip ice cream. Her lips aren’t perfect--chapped in places, pricked with tiny ice crystals, moving with a sort of nervous frenzy that comes with disuse.

Nonetheless, they feel like home.

Rapunzel slides her fingers into white hair, and it’s silky like clouds. So soft. So perfect.

The only real thought Rapunzel can process is that she never wants to let go. Perhaps part of her is terrified if she does, Jaina will dissolve into the ghost she is to everyone else.

She feels Jaina wrap her hands around the collar of Rapunzel’s dress, pulling her closer. It’s more comforting than Jaina knows.

Jaina pulls away first, hands loosening and head tilting back. She meets Rapunzel’s eyes for a few moments, processing what just happened before breaking out in an enormous grin and a series of delighted giggles.

“You just--you look so dumb,” Jaina chortles. “Like you tried to eat the sky or something.”

Rapunzel glances into the hand mirror, now long since pushed aside. Her mouth is smeared with bright blue, trailing onto her skin in pale smudges.

She smiles. “I can live with that.”

Rapunzel leans down and kisses Jaina again.

Yes I used that one picture of the girl straddling the other girl while putting her makeup on for inspiration for this, what of it???

Also for whatever reason, I love the idea of Fem!Jack calling Rapunzel Rae? I feel like Fem!Jack’s teasing and pet names would be a tiny bit different than boy Jack’s, idk.

I JUST AKSJCUBWSYD

I KINDA WANNA DO MORE FEM!JACK X RAPUNZEL CONTENT

Pic credits available upon request!

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addictedtomanga · 4 years

Text

Shoujo manga recommendations - unrequited love

1. 360 Degrees Material

Taki is the cool yet strange guy in Mio's class. She bumps into him at the subway station after school and saves him after he almost gets pushed onto the tracks. The next day, he returns the favor by saving her from an incoming car. This marks the start of Mio's love.

2. Ai Kara Hajimaru

Sakura Ai has always loved sunflowers, as they appear like the sun, which incidentally also was the name of her first crush, Taiyou, in the 3rd grade. From since then, Ai has never had another love and has also become quite introverted, but after meeting a guy with the same name, somethings will begin to change…

3. Anta Nante Okotowari

Yui has a deep love for her "older brother" (they're not actually siblings, but are related), and she is devastated when he gets married. While at the wedding, Yui meets a sobbing boy, Kaoru. It turns out that his cousin (that he was in love with) is the one Yui's brother is marrying. When Yui moves into a boy's dorm so she can seek out new love, she finds that the head of the dorm is none other than Kaoru!

4. Ao Haru Ride

Yoshioka Futaba has a few reasons why she wants to "reset" her image and life as a new high-school student. Because she's cute and had a demure personality she was ostracized by her female friends in junior high, and because of a series of misunderstandings and mishaps, she couldn't get her feeling across to the one boy she has always liked, Tanaka Kou. Now in high school, she is determined to be as unladylike as possible so that her friends won't be jealous of her. While living her life this way contentedly, she meets Tanaka-kun again, but he now goes under the name of Mabuchi Kou. He tells her that he felt the same way as she did when they were younger, but that they cannot go back. Will Futaba be able to continue her love that never even started from three years ago?

5. Awayuki no Namida

Ritsuka, who likes to watch the snow as it falls, has an unrequited love for Fubuki, who lives with an older woman. Ritsuka and Fubuki fall in love, but Fubuki still has past debts toward the older woman, who was his dead brother's fiancee.

6. Bambi to Dhole

Yukimi is her real name but everyone calls her Bambi. She is the student discipline committee member who locks students out of the school if they're a minute late, but sneaks cigarette breaks on the roof. Lone wolf transfer student Tetsu Nagasawa hops the fence after she locks it and breaks her cigarette in half when he finds her on the roof, but he's a super nice guy to a mother and baby on the train. Bambi already has a boyfriend but will the wolf steal her heart?

7. Celeste Blue

Eishi is one of those popular guys that are smart, good looking, and is good at sports. However, he thinks people and "love" are bothersome and would rather not deal with either of them. When his teacher told him to help this girl, Uta, to study, he dreaded the idea of having to stick with such an annoying girl. Soon, though, his heart starts to lighten up towards her.

8. Datte, Kimi ga Warau kara

Let’s get into a time machine and return to that time. Where it was always fun and you were always laughing, to that time... "I only have three more months to live" Yui who just transferred to a new school in the countryside becomes Ryo’s classmate. Yui who is suffering from an illness has a "wish" that she can’t tell anyone, but Ryo wants to grant her that wish but… After death, reality hits Ryo and Yui. This is the story of the eternal promise that was made by the two of them.

9. Eien no Mae

Arisa has had a crush on classmate Nageki since the school festival, but has never spoken to him. Will she be able to strike up a conversation before they part ways at graduation?

10. Futari no Himitsu

Saijou Kiki is a model and child star and with the release of her new commercial her popularity skyrockets. At school, she harbors feelings for Takumi-kun... but somehow ends up kissing his friend Teppei?! And what's more, they've switched bodies due to some sort of old legend?!

11. Getsuyoubi Kara Kataomoi

Despite his one-sided love, a prince at school encouraged his crush to confess to her crush. But he also could not resist confessing to her. What will happen?

12. Hachimitsu ni Hatsukoi

Koharu and Nacchan are childhood friends which many of their friends thought they are a dating couple. Soon, after getting into senior high school, Koharu feels something different with Nacchan. While Koharu tries to figure out her feelings, Nacchan's already falling in love with someone else, the beautiful Saionji, but his love doesn't stop him from caring for Koharu. Does what Nacchan feel towards Saionji really be love? Why can't he let Koharu go on a blind date?

13. Hatsukoi Hakusho

A collection of one shots.

14. Hiren Trip

Miyu, an ordinary new first-year student who hopes to become a mangaka meets the schools’ class president who seems to have a hidden side to him. While being pushed around by the cool but private class president, the curtain on Miyu's stormy school life is raised.

15. Katakoi Triangle

Sekiya-san of the cultural library has an unrequited love for Yuuki-kun. The one who cares about Sekiya-san is the popular Kasai-kun, who is also Yuuki-kun's friend! And, what's this? Yuuki-kun is rooting for Kasai-kun?! It seems that everyone's feelings are one-sided... or are they?

16. Kimi ga Inakya Dame tte Itte

Nayu and Oumi are childhood friends. Without realizing it, Nayu finds she has fallen for Oumi over the years. However, just as she comes to terms with her feelings, Oumi reveals himself to be in love with the pretty Tsuzuki-san in his class. How will Nayu deal with such heartbreak?

17. Kimi o Omou Toki

What does it mean to love? Most of the time, I don't know... Falling in love with someone always ends up with a farewell. Encounters in which you can meet a kind man are very rare. For someone to tell me, "Momo-chan, I love you very much~ ♪" and to caress me with a smile... I don't understand the meaning of those things. Still, that kind of behavior gives me a warm feeling and makes my head spin.

18. Kimi to Kyun Koi, Shiyou

A collection of one shots.

19. Kobayashi ga Kawai Sugite Tsurai

The comedy starts when the cross-dressing begins! The Kobayashi twins, Mego and Mitsuru, were named after historical figures, but only Mego has grown up with a taste for history. So when Mitsuru is in danger of losing his weekends to extra history classes, he convinces his sister to swap clothes with him and ace his tests! After all, how hard can it be for them to play each other? But Mego can’t rely on just her book smarts in Mitsuru’s all-boys, delinquents’ paradise of a high school. And Mitsuru finds life as a high school girl to be much more complicated than he expected!

20. Koi dano Ai dano

After constantly transferring during middle school (Warau Kanoko-Sama), Naedoko has entered Takara No Tani High along with Tsubaki. Follow her adventures as she tries to restore the Newspaper Club's status without being noticed by the Broadcasting Club or Student Council...!

21. Koi ni Dokubari

Youthful, real love between a pure girl x sharp-tongued boy. ‘The boy I’ve had a long unrequited love for has found himself a girlfriend. On top of that, she’s my best friend. Even though I’m the one who met him and fell in love with him first. Why did he not choose me…?’ Heart-broken Aya meets Ryuu, an unpredictable, older boy. Aya gradually begins to be drawn to this sharp-tongued, but kind Ryuu. However, this love isn’t straightforward at all. “When you fall in love, you can’t keep being a ‘kind, good girl’.” Ryuu’s words pierce her heart, doesn’t disappear and is painful, but…?

22. Last Game

Yanagi is rich, smart, a girl-magnet, and always at the top of his class... well, until Kujou transferred in his primary school. She was quiet, plain, and poor, yet not once has she failed at beating Yanagi, both in academics and sports! Yanagi has made it his life goal to defeat her and thus, followed her from elementary until college over the past 10 years. Only when he decides to change the rules might he finally win. Here comes their last game!

23. Love so Life

Shiharu is a high-school student who loves kids, lives in an orphanage, and works at a daycare... Until the handsome uncle of two-year-old twins offers her a raise if she'll be their babysitter. Often relying on memories of her mother's actions for guidance, Shiharu quickly finds herself falling in love with her new makeshift family.

24. Mako to Aki-chan no Koigokoro

A collection of one shots.

25. Metallic Colors

The story of a stylish and gaudy girl who strives to win the heart of the boy she likes.

26. Nonchan to Watashi

Risa and Takumi are childhood friends, but due to a fight in the past, they stopped talking to each other. Now university students, Takumi is a famous playboy who goes out with a different girl every day, and Risa still regrets not having been able to apologize for what she did six years ago...

27. Orange

In the Spring she was 16, Takamiya Naho receives a strange, but detailed letter from herself, ten years in the future. At first she thinks the letter is a prank, but then the things written in the letter actually happen, including the new transfer student that sits next to her in class, Naruse Kakeru. The letter reads just like her diary entries, down to the same characters. It is not till two weeks later, when Kakeru shows back up at school, that Naho finishes the letter. In the letter, her 27-year-old self tells her 16-year-old self that her biggest regret is that Kakeru is no longer with them in the future, and asks her to watch him closely.

28. Propose no Okite

A high school girl becomes a wife?! And her husband is the worst man? Because she had to pay her family’s debt, she married! The husband is the son of a big Hotel company. The first time she saw him she said "You got a wife thanks to your money! You’re the worst!" "I maybe the worst", he said "but you’ll have to live all your life by my side…"

29. Saboten no Himitsu

Miku Yamada has a longtime crush on classmate Kyohei Fujioka. But no matter how many times she tries to show him how she feels, clueless Kyohei just doesn't get it. Frustrated, Miku gives up on him, only to have him start calling her "Cactus" for being prickly when he's around. Will Kyohei ever figure out Cactus's secret?

30. Shitsuren Biyoushitsu

A collection of one shots.

31. SP x Baby

A romantic comedy about a privileged man and his kickass female bodyguard. Tamaki Hasegawa misses an interview for a much-needed job in order to stop an assault on a man running for his life! The man—Kagetora Sugo, the prime minister’s nephew—then asks Tamaki to become his bodyguard. Tamaki isn’t sure she’s cut out to be a bodyguard, but Kagetora has another reason for wanting to hire her. Unbeknownst to her, they’ve met before…

32. Special A

Her whole life, Hikari Hanazono has been consumed with the desire to win against her school rival, Kei Takishima--at anything. He always comes out on top no matter what he does, and Hikari is determined to do whatever it takes to beat this guy!

33. Suki desu Suzuki-kun

Suzuki Hikaru, Hoshino Sayaka, Ito Chihiro and Suzuki Shinobu are all new students who have just entered the same middle school. Sayaka is a shy girl who secretly loves acting. Hikaru is an energetic boy who loves basketball. Incidentally, he shares the same last name with Shinobu, a popular rich boy who would be perfect if not for his rotten personality. Chihiro is Hikaru’s childhood friend and has long had a crush on him.

34. Wana Love - Wanna be the Honey Trap

Mayuko is a model. She's acting like a beauty in front of guys but in fact she's suffering of an unrequited love with the cameraman Nagumo...Will she reveal her true nature through his lens...?

35. Yoshiwara Hana Oboro

Hana is a normal teenager who goes to school normally, that is until she gets run over by a car... or did she? Suddenly, she finds herself in a weird place known as the "Red Light District"... in EDO PERIOD?! Trying to find a way to get back to her own time, she somehow gets mistaken for a prostitute and has to escape. Not expecting to be saved by a gentleman, she suddenly ends up in a geisha house.. but then she is bought by the same guy who helped her earlier?!

36. Yumemiru Taiyou

While loitering in the park, Shimana Kameko, who intended to run away from home and skipped school, meets a suspicious man in a kimono. This man, who had been locked out of his house, offers Shimana a place to stay. However, he requests she fulfill three conditions in exchange for her tenancy?!

#manga #shoujo recommendation #unrequited love #romance #ao haru ride #bambi to dhole #kobayashi ga kawai sugite tsurai #last game #love so life #orange #special a #suki desu suzuki kun #yumemiru taiyou #one shot #sherlock #shoujo manga #mangacap #mitsuki kako #wana love

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snapefiction · 4 years

Text

#21. Christmas Present - Snapemas Challenge

A/N: Day 21 of Snapemas! I hope you like it! This one is a little bit longer. I hate proof reading so much it stops me from uploading Christmas is so close now! I can't wait! ahhhhhhhh I will upload more - I promise (I just dunno when)

Idea from @deepperplexity ´s Writing Challenge ! Check her Writings and the other Snapemas posts out! :)

❤️ Please remember that English isn’t my native language and that my Writings will include Mistakes and maybe weird formed sentences. ❤️

Pairing: Severus Snape x Professor!Teacher

Warnings: Mention Cursings, Slight NSFW mention of cookies - might make you hungry - atleast I got hungry - I love cookies

Word count: 5941

Y/N - Your Name, Y/L/N - Your last Name, Y/H/C - Your Hair Colour

#21.Christmas Present

,,O-Oh Professor Snape, before you leave I uh wanted to ask you something." In response he just rose his eyebrow and stared down on you. You laid down the Silverware on your Plate as the other Professors continued to eat their lunch.

,,I saw that you have quiet a big collection of books and I wondered if you're in possession of one I have been looking for to read for very long." Sighing he wetted his lips. He wasn’t even hiding his boredom. What a great Start, you thought to yourself.

,,Which one are you looking for?" Smiling you set your drink aside. ,,It's a rare one from Scotland. ,The correct way of Potion brewing and wild Herbology'." Now his face looked like your answer might actually have impressed him. ,,I am able to call one of these copies mine."

,,Oh really?" Your excitement seemed to confuse him slightly so you fixed your posture, flattened down your dress and collected your words together. ,,Would you mind if i would borrow it?" You followed him like a lost Puppy as he kept walking down the great hall.

,,You can pick it up tomorrow after lunch at my chambers."

,,Thank you, Professor!“ Smiling you first thought about hugging him but as your arms almost flew around him you backed up and held out your hand. ,,Sorry." Thinking about wether he should take my hand or not he finally decided to get up only to turn around on his heels. As always he vanished within seconds into the dark corridors. The Butterflies in your stomach went crazy now so you just tried to hide your smile as got up yourself to walk the other way leading towards your classroom.

In the next Morning you hurried your whole way up to the mountain where you just recently found a dead Acromantula. It has been two days ago when you have had spotted her. Actually you intended to let her rest in peace but you really wished you could give Severus something in return of his grace. So you quickly pulled out something out of your bag to catch the rare venom dripping from it's teeth. Actually it could become quiet dangerous up in here but since you went there almost everyday you felt more than just safe.

After the jar was full you went on your way back to the castle. It wasn't a too long way. It only took an hour and a half and you also got to take some ingredients you needed for your classes with you too. After you got everything secured in your class stocks and changed your dress you went to lunch. Severus already sat at the unpredictability long table. Smiling you sat down next to him trying to hide your excitement. A good Book was always making you nervous. Not to mention a Book you have been looking for since so long and loaning it from a person you truly kind of liked?

,,Hello Professor Snape, I hope you're doing alright?" You chattered but got interrupted as the food appeared on the table. He wouldn’t have continued the Conversation anyways. After something that felt like an eternity but turned out to just have been 20 minutes you walked next to Severus towards his chambers. You told him about the new Paper you got from the Ministry about magic beasts - even if he didn't asked for it. But you knew if you didn't want to walk in silence you would have to talk yourself.

,,Theres even an article about Muggle Medicine in it. They test it on animals. Did you knew that? That’s so cruel.“ You noticed how he rolled his eyes on your words but you just simply knew he didn't dislike you as much as he disliked Gilderoy Lockhart. As you reached his door he quickly opened it with his wand. ,,Enter." Allowing you to step into his chambers. Nervously you closed the door after you. As he went to his shelf to look for the book you quickly opened your bag. He was quicker than you were so he just stood in front of you and held out the book.

,,One second - I almost got it!" And just by that you were able to grab the small jar. After you held it into the light and put it in his hand you took the book in return. Already admiring the Front Cover.

,,I know it's not much, but I just wanted to give you something as appreciation for the loaning." You Mumbled while scanning the little details stencilled in the edges.

Curious he inspected the label. ,,Where did you get it? So freshly?" Professor Snape quickly asked now, surely interested.

,,I uh - from the left Mountains. I found a dead Acromantula two days ago. I thought the Venom might come in handy for potions." You now looked back up at him. Your smile was wider than usual, you were just so happy about the possibility to finally read this book.

,,It - uh - yeah. Do you know the value of it?" His eyebrows arched.

,,Of course I do. But there's nothing as value as finding something you've been looking for since a long time." You smiled mumbling as you now opened the first pages of the book. Small golden details shined into your eyes. ,,Wow." You mumbled. He didn't even try to hide his stares at you as you looked through the pages and you could feel how he tried to be nice for once.

,,Would you like to sit down and have some tea? You can read it here while I'm brewing and prepare my-“

,,I'd love to." You admitted. Your eyes connected instantly as you closed the book to press it on your chest while sitting down on his couch. The first few moments as you sipped your teas remained silent until you just couldn't take it anymore.

,,Where did you get it? The book I mean." His beautiful dark eyes finally dared to look back at mine and he explained.

,,Hagrid is friends with someone who knew the Author. So as I once helped him out in his garden he just gave it to me." You felt like his voice was more quiet than usual and you had to listen even more carefully. His voice made something blossom inside of you. Butterflies flying, Flowers blooming, Sunshine finally hitting my skin? It felt all the same- incredible sweet and addictive.

,,That's very Kind." The Afternoon continued. Your Conversations were really short but you enjoyed every word. He chooses his words wisely which was the total opposite to you. You spoke as soon as a small thought came to your mind trying to fill the silence. It was like you balanced the Smalltalk out. Spending time with him meant learning to worship his words and worship a peaceful silence. As the Clock strikes 7pm he looked up to you. You grabbed your Coat. ,,Are you going to eat Dinner tonight?“

Shaking his head he pointed to a tower of Notebooks, meaning he was still to intertwined in his Job Tasks.

,,I See.“ Chuckling you pushed a strain of your Hair behind your ear. ,,Thank you for letting me read the Book and the Tea. I really enjoy it.“ For a second he just looked at you before his lips parted.

,,You can stop by and read anything you want, whenever you want.“ Listening close to his voice you noticed how his Perplexity from earlier hasn’t faded yet. But before he’d cancel his Offer you accepted.

,,I’d love to. I´ll see you tomorrow then, Professor.“ Waving over to him you turned around to walk to the great hall. Your Cheeks still beheld the pink touch you got from when you were around him. It was calming you to spent Time with him. You felt more relaxed than sleeping out, hearing rain or hearing your favourite song. He made it all better, he made you feel more safe than anyone else by just offering you tea. Dear Merlin, do you even listen to yourself? How can you be so in love with him after just 5 Months working at Hogwarts?

As your seventh Month at Hogwarts began so did the Winter Time. Christmas was only three weeks ago by now. It was till too long for you liking. Yesterday, a rainy Sunday you started to bake cookies and slightly decorate your room more festive. The Holiday Spirit already took you over in July and now it was finally your favourite time of the year. Smiling you walked over to Severus Classroom to meet him for your daily Meetings. You came here daily to read, grade Papers from your students or just drink some tea with him. It became a loved habitat of yours and he seemed to enjoy it himself as he grew to become a friend of yours. Knocking he almost instantly let you in.

,,I´m already making Tea. I´ll be right there.“ You heard him shout from the Kitchen.

,,Okay.“ You responded as you quickly laid down all your Notebooks you still had to grade and placed the box filled with cookies on his Table. You made some just for him knowing he has a sweet Tooth. Who else would drink their Tea with at least two or three tablespoons of sugar if it wasn’t their sweet tooth speaking out of themselves. Slightly chuckling you sat down on one of the Students Desks to start grading. You could simply work better on one of these as on one of the Teachers Desks. They just seemed too tall and too uncomfortable for your liking.

,,What is that?" Curious you turned around. ,,What's what, Professor?" He rolled his eyes as he heard the name you used. ,,On my desk."

,,I made cookies for you." As he continued to stare at you, you began to explain it to him. ,,I made some chocolate chip cookies, cinnamon ones and some plain ones. I know you like pumpkin so I bought some special cookie cutters at Hogsmead last week." Smiling you went up to the box, opened it up for him and showed him the small pumpkin shaped cookies.

,,See? Do you want to try some?" With caution he carefully took one and bit the half of it off. Waiting for his reaction as he chewed then putting the box aside and going back to your seat. ,,Do you like them?" He still kept chewing.

,,Actually- yes." A small smile made it's way across his lips and he ate the other half too.

,,I really hoped so." Sitting back down you waited until your Cup of Tea which now flew towards you sat in front of you. Severus always made the best tea.

Grading the last Homework you walked over to Severus huge Library Wall only to take the Book you used to read in the Daily. With butterflies in your chest you continued to read the few last pages of the book. You only had one third of the book left and by all means you wouldn't want to lose your tradition. So it happened that you started to reread the pages twice so you would have to spend more time with him or just in his chambers. Actually it’d only take you around 3 days to finish this big book but you didn’t wanted your shared time to end. The time has passed so quickly that you could feel how your body resisted to leave as it was time for dinner.

,,Are you coming with me for Dinner today?“ Severus just smiled. He was already done with his Papers and laid aside the Newspaper he just began to read.

,,Sure.“ He said only to follow you. He told you about something that had happened in his class today and about what he just read in the Newspaper.

,,No way!“ You Laughed grabbing his Arm in disbelief. ,,Imagine this happening to you- Merlin!“ Now he had to chuckle as well. He could make you laugh louder than anyone else. His dry Humor was just the best. After Dinner he walked you to your Chambers and you thanked him as always.

,,Good night, Severus. I see you at Breakfast.“ He put on a slight smile.

,,I´ll see you at Breakfast.“ His dark silhouette faded in the corridors and so did you in your chambers.

The weeks until Christmas was just a few days ago were just stressful. You and Severus almost never talked and just worked which was kind of tiring you but you knew as closer as Christmas was around as closer was the Relief of all this Stress. After Lunch you planned to head straightly back to Hagrid helping him taking care of new magical Creatures he cared for. The small Bowtruckles were new here in this Region and you were too eagerly happy to get a chance to study them and present them in your classes next year. After downing your Tea you wanted to say goodbye to Severus before leaving but he stopped you at the end of the great hall.

,,Um err- would you mind meeting me later in my chambers? I've got something for you and - err- maybe I can cook dinner for us.“ Severus nervously stuttered while hiding his face with parts of his hair. He always made pauses while talking but you could tell he was acting a little bit shy and nervous. Smiling you nodded in agreement. That’s be a great opportunity to give him his Christmas Present you just finished.

,,I'll be there by 8." He quickly left your side in his well known manner. With his flying cape, showing off his presence. As he was gone and you couldn't hear his footsteps anymore you began to notice how red you turned. Your whole face was warm and your heart flattered. That always happened when Severus is near you. You had to admit, you like him. More than just a regular coworker. More than a friend. Maybe that's why you hurried the whole day to be there perfectly on time in front of his Chambers. Your heartbeat crawled up into your head and your hand was slightly shaking. Nervously you fixed your hair one last time and knocked ever so slightly.

,,Come in.." Severus quickly opened the door. ,,Please, come in." He tried his best to smile warm-hearted but you could see him being nervous again.

,,Good evening." He kept his Head low. You'd love to see his face.

,,Good evening , how are you?“ The both of you talked about your day and silently took a seat on the couch after finishing the smalltalk. The warmth of the Cabin reached you to the armchair. Severus sat across of you and began to rumble with his words.

,,I - Yesterday I went to Hogsmeade. I had to get some books and ingredients. And erm I - I came across the jewellery store and uh something catched my eye. I bought it for you." You felt your cheeks glow again. Severus stood up to grab a small package from above the cabin. For you?

,,But Severus- you didn't have to." Flustered you accepted the package as he handed it to you.

,,But it's almost Christmas and I really wanted to get you something." He almost whispered. With slightly shaking hands you opened it up. A small silver Hair needle fell into your hands. It was very pretty handcrafted and at the top was a green stone. It looked like it belong to a Slytherin and you couldn't help but smile. It was the prettiest thing you have gotten since a long time and it really made your heart flatter. The beautiful silver and the pretty green made it look like it belonged to someone royal.

,,It's so pretty." You looked up to his curious eyes. ,,Thank you so much , Sev. I don't know what to say." Small tears formed in the corner of your eyes and you couldn't help but cover your mouth while looking at the beautiful accessory. The Stone seemed to shine because of the dim light from the cabin. He really got something for you.

,,You like it?" Severus asked and his nervousness faded.

,,I love it." With a bright smile you stood up and fell into his arm. Crossing your arms around his neck and thanking him a million times. As you slightly let go of him you looked at him joking. ,,But you know those aren't my house colours right?" Again he smiled.

,,I know. I - I wanted to give you something that uh reminds you of me." Your smile faded and now the first tears started to roll down your face. It was such a thoughtful gift with a great meaning. You couldn't remember getting such a thoughtful and nice gift ever before.

,,Is everything okay,dear?" He hasty insured while checking your face.

,,Yes." You took a deep breath. ,,Yes. I will just dearly miss you over the holidays." He softly cupped the side of your arms and petted them before pulling you close again. This Time you could directly listen to his heartbeat. It was the first time he hugged you. You always hugged him but he never tried to hug or touch you.

,,I'll miss you too, I guess." He said almost cooing. ,,But maybe we can meet sometime? I mean only if your schedule allows and you're willing to-"

,,I'd love that, Sev." Now he pushed you away a few inches to look into your face. Your Tears already have stopped now by the feeling of being flustered taking over.

,,Sev?" He asked now.

You chuckled. ,,I think that's a cute nickname." You stated and he couldn't help himself but smile as well. He liked it too. ,,Are you ready for your Present?“ As you sat down again , took out the present of your small bag you began to nervously smooth out the edges of your wrapping paper. ,,I feel like I should have get you something else after receiving your gift." Embarrassed you turned red and handed it to him. But Severus didn’t mind, excited he opened it up. After holding it in his hands he began to smile widely. A black scarf which- for once- matched his height and wasn’t way too short like the regular ones.

,,Did you made it yourself?" He asked after noticing his small initials stitched into the fabric as he brushed over them with his fingertips.

You nodded. ,,Yes.“ Smiling he moved closer to you and pulled you into a hug. ,,That's the best thing I've ever gotten." He admitted and enjoyed being close to you in this intense Moment.

,,I'm glad you think so." Feeling relief you noticed how short your breath has gotten by now. What’d you give to be even closer to him by now. Seconds passed and you didn’t let go of him, you simply didn’t dared to. The Moment he’d let go of you, you’d miss his touch instantly. But when his tall hands slowly stroked over your back you didn’t felt like he’d want to let go as well.

A loud knock made you both tear apart. Scared you looked back to Severus. He looked as confused as you did.

,,Enter.“ Grabbing your Wand you got up, walking together with Severus to the door to see who interrupted you.

Hagrid almost tripped into the Chambers. ,,Ms. YLN, here you are. I need ya help! It’s about the Babies.“ He looked so panicked and your heart almost ripped apart but you just gave Severus a quick smile.

,,I´m sorry, I erm it’s urgent. .. I uh can be back in an hour. Is that alright?“ He quickly nodded and by that Hagrid grabbed your Hand to rush after him. Following this Giant Man you sighed. There was no worse timing right now. He pulled you right out of your Bubble of being close to Severus.

,,What happened to them?“ You asked him as he continued to hurry towards his hut.

,,Somethin´ in da forbidden Forrest bid them. Dunno know what to do!“ Pressing your Lips together you thought about Spells which could help you. If they were so small it could quickly be too late for any help if they didn’t got the right help. Quickly running to the small Baby Bowtruckle laying on Hagrids Table you inspected their wounds.

,,Shh, it’s okay. Let me have a look.“ The tiny leg was bent in weird directions and a small bite was visible. Taking out your wand you quickly healed the wound and took care of the small lad.

,,Do you have an idea what could’ve bitten them?“ Hagrid just shook his head. Sighing you let the Bowtruckles walk over your hand.

,,I can take them with me. It’s not the same like the forrest but they could grow up being safe.“ Hagrid helped you bringing them to your classroom before you quickly hurried back to Severus. Hopefully he wouldn’t be too mad.

Knocking you flattened the wrinkles on your dress. Severus opened the Door rather slow. He nervously scratched his head. His black hair was now tucked behind one of his ears.

,,I wasn’t expecting you to be back so quickly. Or to return at all.“ He admitted and you could already smell the Dinner he was cooking.

,,It was about the Bowtruckles I told you about. I brought them to my Classroom. Now I’m all yours, I promise.“ He let you slide inside and as you watched his movements you noticed that he was as flustered as you were.

,,If you want to you can keep reading until I’m done cooking?“ His Insecurities were still visible but as you smiled at him his tension faded.

,,Sure.“ Approving his idea you made your way to his living room as he continued cooking. As you watched him buzzing around in his kitchen from afar you opened your hair to adjust the hair needle he gifted you earlier. It fitted perfectly. A lot of hair needles were to short for your long yhc Hair but this one could hold everything in place easily and made you feel like a princess. You walked over to the mirror on the wall to look at your hair. You really liked it more this way. He got you the perfect present. Happy about the present you sadly realised how you forgot to bring your present for him at your chamber. You knitted him a scarf because you noticed how he never had one besides him. The green and black matching the house he was the head of.

,,You truly are beautiful." You slightly got scared as you didn't noticed how he stepped behind you. Your cheeks directly became red again. ,,Thank you.“ He took the Book from the top of the shelf where he lastly placed it only to put it in your Hands.

,,I´ll try to hurry.“ He assured before heading back to the kitchen.

If your students would hear his voice right now they would highly doubt it was him. His usual demanding voice now was low and casual and by that he went into the kitchen. Sitting down on his Armchair you could sometimes hear him mutter some small words like ,Fucking garlic' or something else which made you smile even more.

Who would have thought that you would sit on his Armchair on a peaceful night , reading a book as he was cooking for the both of you? It was almost like a date. Well actually that wasn't true. It felt like the future you wished so deeply for as a kid. The only difference was that you imagined it to be your husband but you didn't mind it being Severus. You knew he would never feel the same as you do. It was okay. It truly was. Sometimes you wished you could show him some affection- but he wouldn't like it. Being friends - which was obviously a huge step to make - was totally enough. You could hide your feelings if you had to. Having a good friend was all you ever asked for so you shouldn't bother yourself or even him with feelings who could ruin it all in a minute.

,,In 10 Minutes Dinner will be ready." He loudly announced from the kitchen. Surprised you looked up. He still hurried around the kitchen. Slowly you turned back a few pages. As you were lost inside your thoughts you couldn't remember what you just have had read. Putting a small paper in the book between the pages and closing it you had to sigh. Soon it will be Christmas and it would be your third one in Hogwarts. Maybe Severus would be here? Lost in your thought you walked over the kitchen where you spotted Severus opening some Wine. His arms pulled the cork without any sign of effort.

He scanned my face with his eyes and then made his way over to the oven where he pulled out some casserole. It smelled like heaven and soon the whole kitchen had it in the air. His movements made your Thoughts wander. His Arms were so strong- you never seemed to notice before.

,,Whats on your mind?“ Carefully he added a few last ingredients to the food as he pulled you out of your thoughts.

,,I erm was wondering how you celebrate Christmas?“ You lied blushing as he caught you thinking about him.

,,Actually I don't celebrate it. I don't celebrate anything." Shocked you now looked at him.

,,Not even your Birthday?" He shook his head which made his hair whip.

,,Not even my Birthday."

,,Severus! Who hurt you?" He had to laugh about your unbelievable expression. While pulling out a chair for you.

,,There's no sense in celebrating alone." Severus simply stated, pushing your chair slightly towards the table.

,,Thanks.“ Mumbling you thought about this nonsense. ,,Of course it is! I do it too." You added.

,,Then how do you celebrate it?" He now asked curiously and looked at you sitting down across of you.

,,I always celebrated it with my Family but since I work at Hogwarts I just.. spend it alone. Anyways firstly I get all the presents for everyone and make sure they arrive at the right place. Then I get a Christmas tree and decorate it. Afterwards I bake some cookies and in the evening I sit down to read a book and eat all those cookies. As simple as that." As you finished you expected him to say something but he kept on listening to you. ,,It sounds a little bit sad but it isn't that bad. I uh I try to enjoy my own company." Severus felt a little bit of pity. He knew you are really attached to other people and knowing you spend days which are important to you alone made his heart sink. He simply knew too well how being alone feels like.

,,As I already said, I uh would love to see you.“ He tried to uplift the Mood and placed some Food on your Plates. Nodding you thanked him. ,,I can’t wait.“ You admitted again and held up your Glas of wine.

,,Thank you for cooking for us and thank you for your present.“ He copied your movements and you slightly pushed your Glasses together. After you both took small sips from your wine you began to dine. His eyes always made sure you weren't spitting it out or something but actually you haven't had any reason for it.

,,It's really delicious. I never knew you were such a great cook?“ He chewed up and answered chuckling.

„I haven’t cooked for you before. Or anyone in general, so how would you know?“ You joined his chuckles and took a sip of wine again. As you tried to stretch your legs a little bit you accidentally touched his leg. Instantly his glance got up to yours and you pulled back your legs. It was like a small electric shock. A good one indeed.

,,S-Sorry." Blushing you locked my eyes with your plate. Your heart was pumping so fast you couldn't taste anything of the food in your mouth anymore. Your nerves got foggy and your hands numb. Carefully you pushed around some broccoli on your plate. You liked touching his leg but he did he too? Did you reveal yourself? Carefully looking up he did the same thing you did a few seconds ago. Moving around some veggies on his plate. Was he bored of you? You didn’t knew. The air filled with so much tense it got harder to breathe. Biting on your lip you got an idea. It would cost some courage but it wasn't impossible to do. If it would fail you could simply excuse yourself by it being an accident but right now you had to know how he'd react. Laying down the silverware silently you carefully stretched out your leg towards his.

Now your legs were touching and you didn't dare to look up. The silence thickened and as it almost got too much he laid down the silverware himself and put one of his hands on your knee. Too excited your breaths got irregular and you could feel his heat storming through your body. With his thumb he started to draw small circles on your leg and as he continued for a while you looked up to him. Your face was probably fully blushed but he didn't seem to care. His dark eyes which have never looked this dark locked with yours. His expression didn't reveal anything. Was he enjoying it? Was he doing it because he thought it was what you wanted? Well, it was what you wanted but he just isn't the type of guy who'd do anything just because he think you’d expect it. Slowly his hand started to wander. A few millimetres upwards and you almost couldn't help yourself. Your thoughts wandered to things you could never say out loud. Imagining his fingers on places of your body you usually only touch myself.

As you realised how shaky your breath left my throat you grabbed your Glas of wine and flushed it all down. A small smirk appeared on his face.

,,Some more?" Quickly you nodded. You´d say yes to anything he would ask you to right now. He had the full control over you, you thought. How could a simple man make you so weak within seconds?

,,Want to continue this on the couch?“ Quick your legs pushed yourself up from the chair and you walked over to the living room. Not being able to answer him with your words. The whole Situation just became more interesting than you firstly anticipated beforehand. The mood has completely changed. There was something else in the air which you haven't felt before that intensive. Severus again opened another bottle of wine and now sat down directly next to you. He never did that. Usually there was atleast one pillow size distance between you or he sat in his Armchair. But now his legs touched yours and his arm touched yours as he leaned forward to the desk to reach for our glasses.

,,Thanks." You whispered and you felt like as if this wasn't anything you could dream of. The smell of his Aftershave filled your nose and the fabric of his trousers against your bare knees got you shaking. Silently you drank the first glass in silence. But at our second Glas he laid his hand on your leg. Not on your knee. On your Leg. Right before the fabric of your skirt started to hide your skin. Did he knew what he did to you? Could he feel your heartbeat? Could he feel your butterflies?

Closing your eyes I felt the alcohol hitting your nerves. It wouldn't take much to make you drunk but right now you felt like you would need every drip of any type of alcohol you could possibly get. Carefully you moved your head to your side to look at his face. He softly swung his wine in his hand and drank it too. His pink small lips cupped the Glas corner and his hair flew a few inches back as he put his head into his neck and drank up. As he stood his Glas back down you wanted to be more offensive. He seemed to be interested, you thought. Slowly and with my glance on the cabin you widened your neckline to reveal more of my chest. His eyes hushed over to see what you were doing. Slowly, torturing slowly you revealed a small part of your throat. Continuing you showed him more and more. His hand on your leg clutched his fingers a little bit stronger into your flesh. You continued until you almost revealed your bra. As you looked over to him now he smiled slightly.

,,You're beautiful." He whispered. ,,I can only repeat myself.“ Slowly you pushed your weight a little bit up to sit down on his lap. His Hands instantly guided you. Making sure you were comfortable. Now you could hear his irregular breath as well.

,,I really like you, Severus." You admitted as you hugged him closely again. His Hands again rubbed your back and as you felt him stiffen under you you almost inaudible moaned. Hoping instantly this wasn’t the day he’d break your heart by telling you to back off.

,,The last few months uh I felt like I was acting like a freak and it took me some time until I understood that I maybe just got confused by something. Or someone." You now stopped in your tracks to look at him again.

,,Someone?" You asked.

,,You." His cheeks were red. ,,I really like you." He didn't knew where his courage came from but he knew it was the right time to finally admit it.

,,Really?“ You couldn't move out of fear of scaring him and his feelings away. Your heart beat so hard you feared he could see it banging from your chest. Did he really just say that? Or did the wine you had at dinner fogged your senses. Did he really just admit that to you?

,,You Don't have to feel the same but I wanted to let you know that i like you more than just friends.“ As he intended to back up a little bit you quickly moved towards him and pressed your lips against his. In your chest was a firework exploding and butterflies from the night escaping to your stomach. Softly he kissed you back and put his hands on your hips where they used to rest until the kiss was paused so the both of you could catch some air.

,,I like you too. More than just friends“ You whispered smiling.

His lips brushed against your earlobe. The words he spoke made your emotions going even more crazy. You could scream out of tension, happiness and even more out of lust. Being this close to him made you go crazy. You wanted to have Sex with him all night and at the same time you felt like this was an even more intimate Moment than you ever had before.

,,Would you like to stay for the night?" His raspy dark voice sounded like it just got even darker than before.

,,I’d love to.“ And again his Lips touched yours. Slowly and more passionate this time. The Night continued in more and more Intimacy. The Both of you wouldn’t spent Christmas alone this year nor the following ones.

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ivarsshieldmaiden · 3 years

Text

Am I ready for real love? - Part II

Modern Ivar x reader

So you lovely people. Here it is. Part two. Thank you for your kind words about Part I and the hearts - I really appreciate it. ❤

You two sat there for a few hours and talked. You totally ignored your friends, because it just felt so good to talk to someone who felt the same. You were definitely on one level. Sometimes time doesn't matter. You've known Ivar for a few hours and you already felt connected.

He even asked for your number and wanted to meet you at the festival on the next day.

Lying on your bed you were smiling until someone knocked on your door. Nina.

"Hi y/n, I'm sorry for today. We didn't think about it and how you feel."

"Yeah Nina. I understand but thats the reason because I always say that I don't fit in anymore. You don't even care if I'm all alone on such a big festival."

"No.. it was just. We're really sorry. But tomorrow is a new day. So tell me about that fuckboy." Nina grinned.

"Oh see, He is not a fuckboy we really had a nice conversation and it just clicked. I really like him and I will meet him again tomorrow."

"Okay we will see. He definitely looks like one. But I'm happy for you. Maybe it's something serious" Nina smiled shyly.

"Yeah"

Tomorrow has come. You're really excited to see Ivar. But he isn't a fuckboy you thought.

Please don't be a fuckboy. He was so nice.

"Hi y/n, nice to see you. I already bought you a drink. Mojito. I hope you like it."

"Hi Ivar. Yeah thank you. Its actually my favorite cocktail." You smiled.

The day went on. You had a nice time. You were chatting with some of ivars friends, dancing and drinking. It was just the perfect festival day.

Until you heard some of ivars friends whisper: "do you think he really likes her? The last one was way more attractive. I mean she's from Germany how would that even work? She's just another one from his list i think. Just watch - he will take her home and after that directly to the airport to fly home..."

He had told you that he never really was the guy for a real relationship but seeing is friends with girlfriends he wanted one too, like you. But somehow you thought that he said these things because you wanted to hear them. Tell you the same story.

You don't even know this guy. Could you trust him? Was Nina right and he just wanted another fast fuck?

"Is everything ok, y/n?" Ivar asked worried.

"Oh yeah sure. I was just thinking. Maybe I should leave and go back to the hotel. I'm a little tired." You stuttered.

"No don't go just yet. The night is young. Stay by my side. We've got so much to do tonight." He said, raising an eyebrow.

Okay. That was enough. You just walked away. How could you think that this guy would really come up to you because he was thinking "this could be her, I want to get to know her". Nina was definitely right. He was a fuckboy. Or were you back with your old habit: overthinking.

You just walked in your room. And did something you never did. CRY your fucking eyes out. You cried about everything.

You are a person that is falling for someone really fast, not in love, but with the persons acting, voice, eyes and body. You just felt like a little teenage girl who needs to listen to Jojo's song "get out". You felt so stupid.

Why can't you just find a guy who really likes you. For your friends it always looked so easy.

You couldn't understand yourself anymore. You just wanted to pack your things and start a new life somewhere else. These words of his friends just brought up everything from the last years. Why did you even let yourself use from these fuckboys, why did you do it..over and over again?

No. Your phone rang. Ivar. Ivarrrrr. Should you pick up? Yeah sure..You totally picked up.

"Hi. I'm sorry y/n. I just found out what my friends were talking about. It's just i told you that I've never been the guy for a real relationship. But I really felt that I like you. Even after these two days. And I didn't talked to you just because I thought you were a good fuck. That's not right. Don't listen to them.

Are you still there y/n ?"

"Yeah I was just listening. I don't know, Ivar. I don't know you. I don't know if you are telling the truth." You said with a sad smile.

"No stop. I want to make it up to you. I really like you. I never said that after just two days, but you know what - sometimes time doesn't matter. So as I said before. The night is still young. Would you message me the adress of your hotel and we can have a great evening together in Copenhagen?!" Ivar asked shyly.

And after that he hung up. And let you all alone with the decision.

Maybe you just give it a go. You haven't seen much of copenhagen so far and it seems to be a wonderful city. And most of the cities are even more wonderful by night. you thought and texted Ivar the adress of your hotel.

Okay. Get ready. I'm already there. Give me 20 minutes.

Ok.ok wow. What should you wear. A dress. Hotpants ? No no. You decided to were a crop top and a long skirt.

You heard a knock on your door. It was Ivar.

Suddenly the vibes between you to got very shy and awkward. Nobody really knew what to say.

Ivar walked with you to Tovoli. A park in the middle of the city, even with rollercoasters.

It was beautiful. Everywhere you looked were candles and lights. That's something the Danes like, you thought. Ivar told you it's kind of hygge. To make everything cozy and learn to appreciate the little things in life.

That was what you felt. You two talked about these misunderstandings and wanted to start from the beginning with the time that was left until you would fly back to Germany.

Ivar got you a tea and you were sitting on bench under a big tree with lots of colourful lights in it. You again started to feel like a teenage girl in some sort of a high-school movie. But this was your life right now.

"I really like it here, Ivar. It's just wonderful and so calming. I also want to say sorry. I overact so fast because I think I don't really know how the react in such situations. It's because of my whole experiences woth boys and relationships in my past."

"Yeah. Don't apologise. It was their fault. I don't know why the always have to tease. And I was just so dump for letting you go. Alone in the evening. I really like you and want to get to know you for real, y/n."

With these words he looked closely into your eyes. You were melting from these beautiful blue skies you were looking at. He came closer and so did you. He caressed your cheek with his thumb and pressed his lips on yours.

From your feels, fireworks were starting everywhere. It just felt so magical and for the first time it felt real..even after just two days and a lot of trouble. But you knew.. Time doesn't matter..

#modern ivar x reader #ivar x y/n #ivar the boneless #fanfic #vikings #writing

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thepriceofbeingaroseisloneliness · 4 years

Text

DIE PERSONAL INTERVIEW SPECIAL HEADBANG VOL.27 TRANSLATION 2/2

Sometimes delicate, sometimes rough, sometimes you are dazzled by his splendid playing. The red guitarist has reached Dir en grey’s unique mark. “I used to hit the guitar a lot. I wasn’t happy so I would lose my temper soon“ “This is everything I am. This is my axis” “If I were a metal guitarist, Dir en grey music would have been closer to metal” “Jonathan Davis from KORN said, ‘I like the melody of the chorus’ and sang ‘Saku’ in front of me."

Notes before reading: This is the second part of personal interview of Die from the magazine Headbang Vol.27 released on 18th August. The interview is 11 pages long, this part covers the last 5 pages. The second part is focused his experiences overseas and his roots as guitarist.

You can get the magazine at Amazon Japan or CDJapan.

Feel free to correct me if you spot any mistake or any confusing parts.

Links or credits to this post when the content is reposted or captured in other SNS is appreciated :) ------ Text by: Yohsuke Hayakawa (First part) -So, as you said, I feel that Dir en grey at that time was in a rough and emotionless moment. D: Yes, it was like that. Even if I was standing on the stage, it was more about how could I raise my own mood/tension rather than doing it for the fans who came to see us, so if I was in a bad mood, I would stay in a bad mood. But well, at that time, we were playing with that kind of mood/atmosphere: if you don’t like this, then you shouldn’t come to see us. -If it’s a festival focused on overseas bands like 'Taste of chaos’, as some people in the audience didn’t know Dir en grey, did that that feeling of irritation come to the forefront? D: Rather than……at that time, I knew about other bands only by name, but honestly, I was wondering “What the hell is everyone clapping for?”. It looked more like buttering up the audience. It was like “Ah, this is so shallow”. But there are a quite things that I can reflect on now. There were times when I wasn’t kind to the fans. -That was also reflected on the changes of your music style? D: That’s it. Back then, it was all about playing guitar. I thought it was pointless if I didn’t shake the guitar off all the way. That’s why I barely listen to the sound of the other members when we were playing live. Things like, matching the rhythm of the drums. This was something that the staff would sometimes point out to me. “Listen to what the others are playing, keep the rhythm more”, things like that. -At that time, when they told you that, what did you say? D: I said “Oh, yes” and I tried to do what I was asked to do, but once the live started I was like “Waa, let’s go” (laughs) It was good and bad, isn’t it? -So, when you listen to 'Clever Sleazoid, do you remember those days? D: Yes. It was around the time we started playing at Shinkiba (Studio coast), so the image of Shinkiba's lives is very present. Later, we started going abroad, so it really was a time in which the band started to change again. Well, there are many things to reflect on. I used to hit the guitar a lot. I wasn’t happy so I would lose my temper soon. As I made a lot of mistakes during a live, I would be like “what the hell are you doing?”, it’s like being crazy like that would be part of my attitude. I piled the anger up more and more, and when I noticed; I already threw the guitar away. Then, I was like “This is broken” (the guitar). - Don’t make the musical instrument makers cry…. D: Well, at that time, it was more like I felt sorry for doing it. It's a little off topic, but I went to the ESP factory for the first time this year. So, if you see the process of making guitars from the scratch, after that, you'll never throw a guitar. Everyone was there making them from the scratch so carefully, it’s different than seeing the final result. -So, it was like “I can’t treat my guitars like that”. D: Throwing them it’s not ok. -(Laughs) D: That's why I think "Clever Sleazoid" was done when the band was at the last minute, when the band was at that changing period. Maybe…. somehow, it was like a routine for us to make songs, release albums, and touring. Of course, each of them is important, but when it comes to tours, there were a lot of them, so somewhere we got used to that. It was something like that. Especially when I think about it now, I strongly feel that it wasn’t reasonable. At that time, we were touring as a matter of course, fans came to see us as a matter of course and you could say that the things we were doing at that moment were a luxury/privilege. -You are for sure fully realizing that it was like that. D: That’s right. I was doing everything based on my emotions and I showed a lot of my shameful side. -I think that such ups and downs are also what embodies a band called DIR EN GREY that is directly linked to emotions. D: Hahaha, is that so? Really, I remember the good things and the bad as well from that period. I think the way the members perceive things has changed a lot in the last 15 years. - But at that time, hearing the impression of overseas bands that you had at that time(laughs). D: We were going to festivals at that time, right? And everyone was there asking for the applause so to me it was like “what the…?”. I wondered why they didn’t aim to be cooler on stage instead of that. I thought it was because it was a festival, and everyone was excited. Like, “move more like this”, “show yourself more in that position”, “more around like that” ….it was like that at that moment. -There was also a boom in screamo and post-hardcore bands. D: Yes. So, as we were going abroad, we experienced several things as a band. I went overseas with that unsatisfactory feeling because we would be part of festivals and I really felt that we couldn’t pass through the world with the feelings of our live. “The challenge was what kind of live performance we were going to do in front of Deftones’ fans” -Did you change your mind by the time you were part of KORN's "Family Values Tour" in 2006? D: The change was around that time…. however, it wasn't even at that exact moment. I feel like we were still playing only focusing on ourselves and we didn’t look around us. However, people who liked us would come to see us, so a new perspective was born. If we haven’t gone abroad as we wouldn’t have seen things from that angle, we probably wouldn’t have changed. If we've kept always playing just in front of fans who liked us, I honestly think that I might have been playing more and more just to satisfy myself. -I wonder if Dir en grey would be as strong as it is now without that experience. D: I don't think so. We were part of a festival in Germany and people threw stuff at us…. That things like that happened to us…. I think it’s good we had that kind of experiences. -The sharp/bitter feeling of that moment is different now. Currently, I feel that this made your core stonger. D: Well, when you think about the concerts you did in the past, the feeling is different. In the past, I was in a band, but it felt more like "It’s because I can't do it alone". It was like each member has to do it (their part) but now, in order to sound as a band, it is necessary to listen to the members and make the sound. It’s I am 1/5 of that. Otherwise, it won't reach the fans. I don't care if my energy goes up there. It’s a chance to create a unified sound or to stand out as an individual. After all, the sound becomes messy even if only one person rushes, and I think you have to play consciously so that a unified sound can be produced. So now, what I want from a live performance has changed. Probably because I experienced several things. However, even though I gained experience touring overseas, our live performances didn’t get mellow. -Yes, that’s for sure. That's why several overseas bands were interested in DIR EN GREY. D: For example, we toured with Deftones at the "Family Values Tour" and they watched us live, so they called us to be their support band for their next Deftones headline tour. We had the opportunity play in front of Deftones fans, and the challenge was what kind of live we were going to do. As expected, even there, the overseas staff told us, "Why don't you instigate the crowd?” “Do you want to be appealing more to the fans?" "Why don't you ask for more applause?" (Laughs) -Again, the clapping (laughs) D: That’s how the culture is over there, right? It was also a tour where the atmosphere/mood got really bad. For the whole month we were told to interact with the fans more. Even in places that weren’t related to the venue. I can communicate more with the overseas staff because I don’t have to speak English that much but they would told us things like ….“say hello”, “if the fans say something to you, say something back”….. -Eh? Things like that? D: We were pretending to be cool even when the fans were waiting. (laughs) -Hahahaha D: I couldn’t believe that the staff over there was telling us that. Things like “you have to be friendlier with the fans”. For us, it was like “Why are they telling us things like this? It’s awful”. -You were the type of band that you wouldn’t see over there but I think that there were people interested in that atmosphere. D: That might be true. Well, a lot of stuff happened. “This is everything I am. This is my axis” -Then, let's change the topic, let’s talk about the "20 albums that inspired you” you chose this time. Looking at the selection of Japanese music, there are many works where you can feel the taste of beat rock, punk, and rock and roll, but are these the roots of your flesh and blood?

D: That’s right…. there is no metal, right? -That’s true. D: If my musical roots were metal, there would be a lot of different albums so my play style would have been completely different. I also think that my guitar would be different and if I were a metal guitarist, Dir en grey would have been closer to metal music in a different way as well. -There is a sense of balance in Dir en grey because your style comes from that position, isn’t there? D: That might be why (our music) is not completely metal. -Among the albums, you chose D'ERLANGER and BODY because their guitarist is CIPHER. D: Well, this is everything I am. This is my axis. Regarding D’ERLANGER, I mentioned the album from their last live because that’s the one I heard the most. "LA VIE EN ROSE" (1989) and "BASILISK" (1990) were released as albums, weren’t they? But when it comes to live performances, the sound is totally different. The live album has a raw feel, it feels very alive, and the more I listen to it, the more elements I find out…. Like the flexibility of the strings, the picking is too strong and the sound is a little off, the phrase is different from the album or there is no sound…. -You are considerately listening to it in an intense way…. D: Yes. There is too much sense of being a real live in it, so I heard this the most. -This degree of perfection is reflected in "D'ERLANGER TRIBUTE ALBUM ~ Stairway to Heaven~" announced in 2017 by D'ERLANGER. It was cool that you covered "EASY MAKE, EASY MARK" recorded in this live. D: Including arrangements, CIPHER told me that he “felt a lot of love” in it (laughs) -Like the live performance, while being full of love, the essence of DIR EN GREY is there too. That’s a good example of how to do a cover. D: Certainly, when I was working on that cover, I felt like I was doing our own song. -Next is CRAZE “That's life" (1996). A long time ago, I remember that you chose and covered the song “Kizu” at the FC limited live of DIR EN GREY in 2001 D: Ah, yes yes. I did “Kizu” and D'ERLANGER as well. How could I say this?.......in a few words, the best album. -Especially at this era, the members had an edgy image, and their atmosphere was hard to approach. D: That's right. The atmosphere was also cool, you don’t get used to it, the 4 wolfs (the members of CRAZE) personality is realistically reflected in the song. I felt like “Kizu” represented how I felt, and that passion and power was so real. It’s different than D’ERLANGER but CRAZE was also the coolest band for me. Then, didn’t I choose something from Ziggy as well? -Yes, "KOOL KIZZ" (1990) which is also a good album. The famous song "DONT STOP BELIEVING" is also included in this work. D: That's right. I knew ZIGGY before knowing D'ERLANGER, and I practise guitar copying them. So, if I hadn’t known D’ERLANGER, I would probably have become a rock and roll guitarist (laughs) Carrying a Les Paul guitar, playing rock and roll, with long hair with a little perm. -Well, I’m not kidding when I say that would look good though. "Jonathan Davis from KORN said, ‘I like the melody of the chorus’ and sang ‘Saku’ in front of me." -On the other hand, Western music has an alternative atmosphere as a whole, when it comes to pop, there are many catchy songs. Furthermore, there are bands like Tool and System of a Down. D: I think in that area, I was inspired by listening to these bands since I started doing DIR EN GREY. My interest in how make music, how the live sound was, and how the sound of the CD turned out, was also very big. Also, for example, when we were invited by KORN (Family Values Tour 2006), it was our first long tour abroad, and there were many things to absorb around us. It seems like we were struck by the American style and the style of overseas tours. It was a time when all sorts of things were stimulating. -How did the members feel about the "Family Values Tour", as there were many things that you had to face for the first time? D: Well….at first there were moments that it felt like “is this okay?”. We were the only Japanese band, and there were crazy bands like KORN, Deftones, and Stone Sour, and we're like in the middle of them. Besides, we’ve never done a live in a daily basis. -Didn’t it make you feel confident to be part of that line up? D: Well…. the feeling that we experienced several things is stronger. At the time, the internet wasn’t very good yet, so it made me feel homesick (laughs). The only way to get in contact with the people that was in Japan was by email. Even doing lives and going on tour with the frequency we did in Japan, I can’t even tell the distance we travelled through Japan. This tour was around the whole country, so the distances felt big. We had never left Japan for a month and a half, so I would say that overall, we did well. After all, this was the start of touring in America, wasn’t it? -KORN made it easier for Dir en grey, right? D: They made it really good for us. Jonathan (KORN’s vocalist) liked "Saku" very much and he told me "I like the melody of the chorus" and sang the melody in front of me. -That’s amazing, that Jonathan Davis sings “Saku”! D: Jonathan often watched our live performances and listened to our songs. I'm grateful for that. -Besides that, Fair to Midland from USA and My Vitriol from the UK are also among your choices. D: We toured together with Fair to Midland in 2007. When we did our first tour on our own, they went around with us as opening band. If I do something in another side project, their songs are so good that I want to do something like that. My Vitriol is a band influenced by My Bloody Valentine, I wonder why they don’t sell more, to me, they are in the same line that Fair to Midland. The chord work and the feeling of the melodies make the best combination. I've been wondering why they didn’t release a second one (album). Like, nothing at all (laughs). Then, in 2016 I didn’t know that it came out as it was released secretly*. It’s highly recommended. I can’t help but want to watch them live so much. *In 2016, My Vitriol released their second studio album through a funding campaign at PledgeMusic ( online direct-to-fan music plattform).It was a limited released fanbase-only album, that’s why Die says it was released “secretly”. “I felt like something is crawling inside me. I never had that feeling before” -What is your impression of Tool? D: We were together at a Polish festival in 2007, and despite being a festival, the live performance was perfect. It was like…. "Why does this sound like this?" That's why I couldn't move during the live performance. They nailed it from the beginning until the end. I was close to the PA table for a while, but it was too shocking. Not only the sound, but also the direction and the construction of the songs, they are all art. It's not like music anymore, it's like transcending everything…. It seems like I'm watching a movie, and I felt like something was crawling inside me, I never had that feeling before. Anyway, the live performance at that time was too amazing for me. -If you want to make something like that, you will have to release an album every 5-6 years? D: Hahaha! Wasn’t their latest work the first one in 13 years? I'm surprised (laughs). -That’s right. One of the albums you chose is from System of a Down, but did you like them from the beginning? D: Well, that’s what happened. It’s an indescribable style, but I think DIR EN GREY was also quite fierce in the past. There were times when riffs were not straightforward and "system-like”, flying as words among the members. -Did that happen? It's a valuable story. Last but not least, what kind of expectations do you have for the future? D: Honestly, when it comes to concerts, I guess under these circumstances we won’t be able to do any. We couldn’t finish the flow of “The Insulated World” and we had to move on to the next step, so we are going to start working on the album. All the tour scheduled are gone, right? So, we can work on it before we had planned it. I wish I can write songs, record them and be active in 2021…. that’s exactly what I want, what I couldn’t do in 2020. I would like to tour until I burn out.

#dir en grey #die #Headbang Vol 27 #interview #translation

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