#it was simultaneously the best and worst thing that ever happened to me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ceesimz · 20 days

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Who falls in love in November?

part 2 of this, also known as the happy ending everyone wanted :)

Alexia had three days remaining of her time in Menorca after you left. Never in her life had a vacation been so miserable.

Even without you there, her head was constantly on a swivel when she was out, hoping she’d turn a corner and you were there waiting for her. She was withdrawn from social occasions with friends, stuck in her head thinking about how much she wished you were by her side.

But it wasn’t going to happen. It didn’t happen.

And to top it all off, she had no evidence you even existed aside from the book you gifted her, as if you were merely a figure of her imagination. A daydream she didn’t want to come out of. It was simultaneously the best and worst summer of her life, because she had you, and then she didn’t. You slipped out of her grasp before she could do anything about it, and that fact was eating her up inside.

To be honest, as she boarded her plane home, she had never been so grateful for a vacation to end. She slumped into her seat after storing away her suitcase and sighed heavily, looking out of the window of the place that she currently held mixed feelings about. The whole island was tainted by you and the memories that remained. At the thought, she slammed the window cover shut. It was a pitiful attempt to shove you out of her mind; to be fair to her, it worked for a few seconds. Except, when she reached into her backpack by her feet, her hand grabbed something and pulled it out.

Your book. The only thing that remained of your relationship.

Relationship? Could it be classed as that? Probably not. But what else could she call it? The greatest mistake of her life?

Since she opened the first page the night you gave it to her, she had probably read the note there a hundred times. And so what if she had traced the curvature of your handwriting with her finger as her eyes burned with tears that night? You weren’t there to see it, that’s the only thing that mattered to her.

This book means a lot to me, and from all the wonderful things I know about you so far, I think you’ll like it too. We haven’t known each other for very long but I hope that changes because you’ve already had a better effect on me than anyone I have ever met, and for that I am so grateful. Let me know when you finish it.

That last sentence, as well as the accompanying smiley face that was exactly the same as the one you had drawn on another note to her a few days prior, mocked her. She couldn’t reach you if she tried. She only had your first name and the city you lived in, there was nothing to go off of if she attempted to find you. The worst part of it all is that you could be her neighbour for all she knows, but the only thing she could do was hope that your worlds aligned sooner rather than later. You could live in the apartment right beside hers, or above it, or below. The possibilities were endless and it killed her.

Maybe it was sad and pathetic, but she couldn’t bring herself to read the story. There had been one attempt so far, and it only resulted in a throbbing headache, puffy red eyes, and a damp pillow. Another sigh left her lips as she dropped it back into her bag and zipped it up with more aggression than necessary, earning a strange glance from the flight attendant that walked past her just as she did so.

A little while passed before the plane got ready for take-off, and ever the rule-stickler, Alexia took one of her earphones out as the safety video played out. At that point, she realised just how screwed she was, because she couldn’t even look at a life vest on a fucking plane without thinking back to that day with you on the boat.

“Qué coño estoy haciendo?” She grumbled under her breath, slipping her earphone back in and resting her head back against the seat, eyes closed.

Unfortunately, that was a question she would repeat to herself a hell of a lot the following months. Because, really, not a day passed by without her thoughts being infiltrated by those days with you. The second she closed her eyes at night, she saw your face. When she woke up in the morning, she wished you were beside her, even despite the fact she had never once shared a bed with you.

At one point, sometime in September, she even found herself going along to one of Mapi’s dinners in Barcelona that she always planned. Alexia had been invited to every single one in the past few years since the defender had started organising them with her closest friends, but the blonde had only attended a handful in that time. Her attendance for this one was solely for the purpose of seeing you.

However, you didn’t show up.

There was one chair at the end of the table empty, and though no one ever took it, Alexia couldn’t tear her eyes away. She had a vacant expression on her face throughout the whole duration of the evening, forcing a smile when she had to and keeping her responses short. The people there that didn’t know her too well were probably a little weirded out, but Mapi could see heartbreak in her eyes and the realisation of what likely happened brought a frown to her face. She didn’t want to intrude on a situation she knew Alexia would prefer to keep private, but it hurt to see her friend so down like she was.

Only one conversation topic truly piqued her interest that evening. Near the end of the night, someone asked why you weren’t there. The single mention of your name had her heart racing.

“-has gone to England to see her family for a while.”

The person talking, who Alexia assumed was your friend, went on a bit more about your whereabouts, but the blonde had tuned out of it as soon as she heard that you weren’t even in the country, nevermind the city.

She had the urge to just get up and walk out of the restaurant there and then at the news, but she was here, at a restaurant with alcohol available to her, and instead she decided to throw her personal laws out the window for the night and have a few drinks. They didn’t numb the pain, in fact they probably made it more prominent. Alarm bells were ringing in Mapi’s head at the sight of her friend with an alcoholic drink in her hand, especially since the new season had just started, and she waited until everyone was leaving to bring it up.

“Ale, Ale, espera.” The shorter woman lightly grabbed her friend by the arm just as she started the walk back to her apartment. “Qué passa?”

“No, Mapi.” Alexia mumbled, shaking her head and continuing to walk. Mapi kept up the pace beside her, allowing the silence to sit for a bit, before the older woman sniffled a little.

“Oye. Habla, ahora.” Mapi demanded, halting their movements on the sidewalk as Alexia kept her head down.

“No es importante.” Alexia shrugged dismissively, opting out of looking at Mapi and instead observing the streets she had walked all of her life. Ones that you have probably walked too.

“Es importante!” Mapi argued, before she pushed down her frustration and addressed her captain much more calmly. “Si estás así de triste, es muy importante, Alexia.”

“Stop, Mapi! Leave it, it has nothing to do with you.” Alexia snapped, before turning away and heading back in the direction of her flat.

The fact she slipped into English, now of all times, told Mapi everything she needed to know. Things hadn’t gone smoothly between you and Alexia. Whatever happened, Mapi would stay out of it until she was needed. That didn’t mean she was any less disappointed at it though. Not at you, or Alexia, because regardless of what had or hadn’t gone on, she didn’t blame you and she knows neither of you would have blamed each other too. Whatever had occurred was left in the hands of the world to sort it out.

Though, if she had known it was just a miscommunication that could have been easily solved, she would have grabbed you both by the ears and lectured you to no end.

The truth is, if Alexia wasn’t so stuck in her misery and just read the book given to her, all of her problems would have been solved. In her opinion, if she did read it, it would just mean finding out more about you that she couldn’t have. But, as a matter of fact, getting to the end of the story would give her the one thing she wanted all along.

By the time November rolled around, Alexia and the rest of the Barcelona team were well into the season in most competitions already. The league was going well, they had won the two Champion’s League games so far, and they had just beaten Real Madrid in the first game of the fifth, albeit unofficial, infamous competition of the season- El Clásico.

A win like that always had to be celebrated, and none of the blaugrana players were going to pass up a night of partying in Barcelona afterwards.

There was just one small thing Mapi failed to tell Alexia before they arrived at the club, however.

—

Your life after that vacation didn’t really change. The only noticeable difference was the heartache and the anguish you felt after arriving home that no one would understand. In secret you met, in silence you have to grieve.

Except, your pain wasn’t quite the same as Alexia’s. Hers surely had an expiration date, she would get over you at some point. Yours would only get stronger the longer you spent apart from her, the anxiety turning the scenario you were in from a nightmare into a reality.

You had no doubts that Alexia was a busy person, so for a few weeks, you gave her the benefit of the doubt when it came to reading. But a few weeks turned into a month, then one turned into two, and before you knew it, it was November. Maybe she didn’t want to see you again after all, maybe those few days were enough for her.

That summer felt like a lifetime ago, an out of this world experience that was nothing more than a dream. But it was real, you know it was, because you still feel the phantom touch of her lips on your shoulder and the comfortable warmth of her hand in yours. You still remember every detail about her, like the moles on her face and the depth to her hazel eyes, or the tattoos on her back and the strength of her arms when she embraced you. Not even your wildest dreams could have created such a person like Alexia. She was more than anything you could have wished for.

Perhaps you could have searched her up online, the blonde was apparently a prominent public figure after all, so it probably wasn’t that hard to find out more about her. You didn’t want to do that though, in the weirdest way, it would feel like invading her privacy. What could be found online was most likely not a true representation of her. Though she wasn’t yours anymore, and she never really was in the first place, you knew the media’s perception of her would be so different to who she actually was, and indulging in that would be a disservice to the woman you had the honour to love, even if that was for just a week.

In your time since Menorca, you had gone back to your normal life like nothing had happened. As if nothing had changed outwardly, when internally, everything had changed. You had been introduced to the true beauty of life, what it means to feel seen, only to have it ripped away from you. And maybe it was your fault that it wasn’t yours to experience anymore. If you could go back in time to that final moment in the bar, you would have done everything differently, especially if you had known it would end like this.

At some point in September, the city you loved became nothing but a mental challenge. Alexia could be anywhere, yet in your opinion, there was no morally correct way to try and find her. It all got too much, and you had to escape. Going back to England seemed like a good idea at first, however in hindsight, it just made things worse. Somehow it made the pain, regret, sorrow, it made all of it reach new heights. During the taxi ride back to your apartment in Barcelona afterwards, there were tears in your eyes that hardly left for the next two months. No matter what you tried, you couldn’t get her out of your mind, even though you were probably long gone from hers.

A night out in the city sounded perfect suddenly, in November. One mention of it from a friend of a friend, and you were in. There was some special occasion apparently, according to María, but you didn’t care that much to pay attention. All you knew was that the club was booked for you all, there was a ticket with your name on it, and alcohol waiting for you.

Only, you didn’t expect to meet a familiar pair of eyes at the bar a few hours into the night.

“Ale?” You whispered under your breath at the sight of the woman a few metres to your right, leaning against the bar with a near empty beer bottle in her hand.

With the music thumping throughout the club, there was no way she heard you. But her eyes averted to her left anyway, and they landed straight on you. Her entire body froze, eyes wide whilst the rest of her face seemed void of emotion. It was hard to get a read on her and considering there was a fair amount of alcohol in your system by this point, it wasn’t surprising when the anxiety took over and made you doubt everything.

Did she still feel the same way about you? Was there already somebody else for her? Maybe you didn’t mean as much to her as she did to you. There were probably thousands of other people she could have, when you took her supposed stardom into account. The scale of her fame was still a mystery to you, but at that moment it was too overwhelming to think about. What business did she have falling in love with someone who was nothing more than a fly on the wall?

Nobody ever noticed you, you were just there. Alexia was… Alexia. There weren’t enough words in any and all languages to describe what a person she was.

Unbeknownst to you, Alexia was freaking out too. Not in the way one would initially expect, though; there was one overwhelming feeling for her that wasn’t fear or anxiety, it was relief. Complete, utter, all-consuming relief, because you were right in front of her. Within arms reach, basically. Despite all the possibilities that could occur from here on out, she was just happy to see you.

However, her face hadn’t changed in the time the pair of you had been staring at each other agasp for the past however long, and it didn’t change as she cautiously took a few steps closer to you. With each step she took, your anxiety grew. It grew and grew, until she was about a metre away, and it reached its peak.

In true anxiety fashion, the fight or flight kicked in.

A proper glance at her face and you were breathless, and not in the swooning, romantic way, but instead out of pure panic. The club was too loud, too restricting and suffocating, and the only option that seemed plausible was getting the hell out. You didn’t care about the people you bumped into, or the voice shouting after you. The situation that confronted you back at the bar was more than you could handle and it seemed to be an insurmountable challenge that you weren’t quite prepared for.

In your mind, Alexia was done with you. The heartbreak was tearing through you already and had been for months now, you didn’t need a run in with her to increase that, and you definitely didn’t want closure. Too long had passed, you had grown content with the realisation that she had moved on seamlessly.

It took a matter of seconds for Alexia to lose sight of you in the crowded room, and what didn’t help was the sudden barrage of teammates that seemed determined to drag her to the dancefloor. They were buzzing off their copious amounts of alcohol compared to her one bottle of beer, completely unaware of the turmoil she was going through due to the winning high they were still riding. She saw the disappointed look on their faces as she brushed them off and it hurt for a moment, before she remembered the situation she was in, and then the celebrations were forgotten entirely.

The moment she exited the club, she spotted you outside the next building over, a restaurant with outdoor seating that was closed due to the late hour. You were sat in one of the chairs there, head in your hands with a leg bouncing out of intense anxiety. Alexia knew she was the reason for your current state, it didn’t take a genius to figure that out, but she also didn’t want to leave you alone when you were so clearly worked up. If you pushed her away, fine, she’d leave. She just wanted to try first.

As she prudently walked over to you with a few gentle calls of your name, like she were approaching a skittish animal, you glanced through your fingers to find the one person at the centre of your anxiety approaching you. Rather than tell her to leave, or get everything off your chest in a ‘screw you’ way, or simply pretend she didn’t exist, you removed your hands and sat up like you weren’t just having an anxiety attack. Your people-pleasing habit had no boundaries.

“Are… are you okay?” Alexia asked softly, standing a few feet in front of you with her hands, that itched to reach out and comfort you, holding onto the chair behind her which she leaned on just as an excuse to nervously fidget with something not too obvious.

“I will be.” You gave her a tight-lipped smile that you paired with a quick sniffle and a brush away of the tears on your cheeks.

To anyone else, this whole situation probably seemed ridiculous and unnecessary. Why not just exchange details in the first place? Why not ask Mapi, a mutual friend, for the other person’s details? There were so many seemingly obvious solutions and ways this could have been prevented.

But love isn’t so simple. It’s a risk to take, a fact that often goes unacknowledged and underappreciated. Especially when your heart has already been broken and stuck back together so many times, it’s hard to hand it over again. It is a delicate organ, the only one other than the brain that has the ability to feel, to hold sentiment and adoration.

There’s no rhyme or reason as to why people decide to harm it, but Alexia isn’t one of those people. She’d take your damaged goods and glue them back together with gold if she could, and you’d do the same for her. When all is said and done, there is no blame or resentment present, just guilt and regret. Your souls are too pure for hatred, they’re professionals at harbouring love for those around no matter what, and it’s evident with the way you both treat each other, despite all the unspoken sorrow and devastation individually experienced during all these months.

A week of pure, whole-hearted, unconditional love was worth all the months of anguish. That was an easy conclusion both of you had come to somewhere along the way.

“I…” There was so much that Alexia wanted to say, but she had no idea how to verbalise any of it or where to even start. She believed that nothing she could say would live up to the moment.

“We don’t have to do this, Ale.” You decided for her. Your words exuded a confidence that wasn’t there at all, and you figured that it was probably evident in your anxiety-filled appearance, but what’s the harm in trying.

“Do what?” Alexia replied with her face scrunched in fearful confusion. Ale. She had missed you saying that.

“Do the awkward back and forth whilst ignoring the fact we fell in love four months ago.”

It hurt to admit it out loud.

For months, this pain had been nothing but an internal one, hidden in the background of your thoughts at all points of the day whilst the world around you was none the wiser. The only external signs of such an event were the mascara stains on your pillow after a night of crying and the tear tracks engraved onto your cheeks when walking into work the next day.

You fell in love four months ago. And the person you were still in love with stood before you. But time had passed, and perhaps that love had to be left behind.

“Maybe I don’t want to ignore that.” Alexia’s shoulders were up in a shrug for a few moments, her heart beating away so fast in her chest that a pit of nausea had formed at the sentence she had just uttered. You looked up at her through tears that glistened in the street lamps, a glint of hope in your eyes that you loathed. In just one statement, you were wrapped around her finger again.

“What do you mean?” You questioned firmly, voice distant despite the crack in the middle of it.

“Maybe… I am still in love with you.”

Laughter wasn’t quite the response Alexia was expecting, especially spiteful laughter. Disapproving laughter with anger so clear in its undertones.

“How can you say that after you’ve obviously moved on? After I’ve heard nothing from you all these months?” You scoffed. Your pent-up exasperation wasn’t even at Alexia, she just so happened to be there and saying all the wrong things to act as the catalyst for the eruption.

No, the anger was entirely at yourself. You opened up your heart to someone you knew you couldn’t have, and still had the audacity to be so hurt by the anticipated turn of events. Alexia was never to blame, it was you.

“What? I don't understand.” Alexia retorted, and it’s unexplainably hard to continue your onslaught of misdirected blame when there’s so much pain in her voice.

“You had so much time to contact me, and yet you didn’t. I can read the room, Ale, I can tell when I’m not wanted, and I get it.” The fight left you then, your body deflating of all its tension as you curled back into yourself.

“I had no way to get to you! I don’t get it, cariño, I really don’t, because I have loved you still all these months and I missed you, and if I did have a way to get to you, I would have taken it because I have lost myself after losing you!”

“Oh, so I just gave you my favourite book with my number in the back of it for no reason then?” You scoffed once more, shaking your head as you willed the tears away once more.

Just a few feet in front of you, Alexia was going through about a million different emotions, thoughts, feelings, all that good stuff, at once. Her head was spinning, dizzy at the gravity of what you just said.

“I didn’t read your book.” Alexia whispered, her voice quiet and dripping with awe, still stuck in regretful astonishment at the fact the solution to everything had been under her hands all this time.

Your number, in the back of the book that was right beside her bed. She had you right under her fingertips and she didn’t even know it.

“What do you mean?” You asked in the same tone.

“I could not bring myself to read it because I missed you too much. Your number is really in the back? You are not doing some… some cruel joke?”

As if you’d ever.

“No! I swear, I wrote it in there that night in the bar when I gave it to you. I thought you saw me write in it!” You exclaimed, overcome with all sorts of emotions at the new revelation.

It had been a stupid mishap, nothing more. No malicious intent on either side, no animosity (aside from the last few minutes), and most of all, throughout this whole thing, there had been no love lost. It was just a mutual misunderstanding. That label felt too simple for all the turmoil that had occurred, yet at the same time, an exhilarating amount of relief came with it which soon overrode the seething irritation that flashed by. The possibility of exploring a relationship with Alexia was so much more thrilling to focus on than all that could be different.

There was no use in dwelling on what could have been if this mistake hadn’t happened. Far too often have you done that in the past, and it’s never gotten you anywhere. Alexia had done the same during those lonesome nights after hours spent in the presence of thousands of people in stadiums across the world - going from being surrounded by countless adoring fans to nothing but overwhelming silence was something she had struggled with. It opened up a world of vulnerabilities for her, as she thought and thought and thought until the mental exertion exhausted her and she finally fell asleep.

Something that came with her ACL injury was the introduction of a psychologist, and it had forced her to change so many aspects of her life for the better. Like in this scenario now, where just like you, she wanted to disregard what hasn’t happened, and instead focus on the moment, and all the amazing things that could happen. Because, really, what was standing in her way apart from the threat of a road not taken? And the best thing of all, is that with one look in your eye, she knew you felt the same.

She knew you wanted the simplicity, rather than making it more difficult for yourselves which had happened already since that last goodbye in the bar. Once the realisation settled, the only thing left to do was acknowledge that fact.

“I didn’t. I didn’t see you write in the back, only the front.” Alexia murmured, pausing for a few seconds as the pair of you fell silent.

The pulse of the music could be faintly heard, as could the distant chatter of people passing by, but none of that mattered when the prospect of the future hung within reach between you both. It was that that had Alexia turning the chair she held onto around and slumping down into it out of shock. The adrenaline had run its course, and now it left a tranquil euphoria, a brewing excitement that took its time to build.

“So… you haven’t moved on.” You said about a minute later, holding back a smile that broke out anyway when Alexia laughed at it all.

“No. Not at all.”

Words seemed a little useless from then on. There were coy smiles on each of your faces afterwards, when everything had been hashed out and made clear despite it being slightly overdue. The only thing you could do was stand from your chair, walk the short distance that separated you both, and gaze down expectantly at Alexia. She stood too, the tables turning so that she was the one looking down now, but that didn’t matter for long, because before you knew it, her arms were back around you and embracing you so tightly that your feet lifted off the ground. You laughed into her neck, which in turn made her laugh too, and then the pair of you were just a mess in each other's arms.

It felt like someone had come along and stoked the fire in your heart again. The coldness that had settled in your bones at some point during the last months was gone, instead it had been replaced with the love you’d lacked for too long. This time, it didn’t have a time limit, you were free to relish in the fact that from this day on, there was always going to be someone on your side, a person there just for you. And there was a certain level of pride that came in knowing you were going to be that for Alexia too, because the way she held you so close to her heart, metaphorically and in this moment literally too, told you enough about how she felt.

When you leaned back and looked up at her, you saw the future in her eyes, one that didn’t seem so dauntingly alone and gloomy. There were also tears there too, to your surprise, and it only amplified what you knew about her already; she was made for you. She loved you.

“Please tell me I will not lose you for a second time. I cannot do that again.” She admitted the secret quietly, and before you had even found the words to answer her, the admission was stored away safely in your soul.

“No, you won’t. I… I think I need you, Ale.” You told her, closing your eyes as you rested your forehead against hers. You sensed the relieving sigh that Alexia let out and shared how she felt; at peace.

“I need you too.” Alexia mumbled in reply, her voice cracking with emotion that for once isn’t drowning her, instead, she feels more alive right now than she had since summer. “Te extrañé mucho. Mucho.”

You smiled. A genuine one, with no layers or falsity to it. You smiled because you could, because Alexia and all she was in that moment allowed you to feel worth your weight in gold, something that hardly ever came naturally to you. But with the blonde woman holding you so tentatively, firm in her love despite her fears, you owed it to her to provide the reaction her character brought out.

“I missed you a lot too.” You breathed out, years worth of inadequacy and shame leaving you as you did so. “I’m sorry for causing all this. And for-”

“Why are you apologising?” Alexia cut you off, pulling back from the embrace as her hands gently landed on your shoulders and the frown you had strangely missed came out in full force.

“Because I just made all this so difficult and caused you so much pain for no reason, I should have thought it through more and n-”

“No, don’t.” She shook her head and tugged you back in, her arms around your shoulders and a hand on the back of your head with her thumb stroking up and down comfortingly. “Don’t take yourself down that road. Do not place blame on yourself when there is none there. Please don’t. It is not your fault.”

All you could do at that was nod into her chest. Alexia’s advice hadn’t failed you thus far, so why stop listening to it now.

“I’m so glad I found you again. In a club of all places.” You said, giggling into her shoulder as she chuckled.

“I didn’t know you would be here.” Alexia stated, keeping her hands on your waist as her eyes were wide and adoring as they moved all over your face, almost as if she was in disbelief that she was really with you.

“María invited me, I don’t normally come to these things, but… I guess it’s a good job I did.” You replied bashfully, Alexia nodding immediately and making you laugh once more. “She said it was a big occasion or something? I don’t know, but it must be pretty big if the whole club is booked out.”

“It is a big thing. For us, anyway. I…” She glanced up at the building she was in earlier and her smile faltered a little. She was caught in two minds; she wanted to spend time with you, now that you were in her arms she didn’t want to let you out of her sight, but she also had made commitments to be here with her team tonight. It was an abnormality for her to agree to a night like this, but the excitement and the pleading from her teammates made her give in, and their joy at her attendance made it worth it. “The team won a big game earlier, so they wanted to celebrate. I don’t go to these things too. They begged me, so I should probably go back to them.”

“Okay.” You said, trying to disguise the dejection burning through you. Her hands gripped your sides a little tighter, like she knew what her words had done anyway.

“Will you come back in? With me?” She asked hopefully.

“I don’t know, I don’t want to intrude on your time with your team, especially if it’s a big celebra-”

You were interrupted once more, but there wasn’t exactly any complaining from your side. Alexia’s palms were cradling your cheeks, fingertips light and warm on your soft skin, and in much the same way as she did after that first date, she kissed you. Firmly and fervently, months worth of longing reaching its peak and crumbling with each movement of your lips. It was just as mind-numbing as you remembered- you’d thought a lot about those few kisses in Menorca and how you hadn’t had enough. There was no way you could ever wait that long for one again.

“You will not ‘intrude’ on us, I promise. If I could, I would take you on a date right now, but they will be angry if I do. When you are around, there’s no one else I want to spend time with.” Her eyes bored into yours as she held your face securely in her hands, ensuring you couldn’t look anywhere but at her and take in the honesty of her words. “I want you there. You.”

“I’ll go with you.” You responded like you were in a trance. You basically were: entranced by the affirmation that she wants you and you only. The blonde grinned and ducked down again to kiss you, more than content to revel in your touch now that she has you again.

After that, Alexia took your hand tight in hers and led you back into the club. You trailed behind her, happy to follow her lead, blushing each time she looked back at you with her charming smile that overflowed with utter joy, until you found yourselves back in the main area of the club. Understandably, the vast group of people you didn’t recognise, probably Alexia’s teammates, were partying hard together. There were people on each others’ shoulders, drinks being spilt, some rather abysmal and slurred singing, and a number of new faces that lit up when they saw Alexia again.

“Some of them are a bit loco. You will get used to them.” Alexia said into your ear, and when she moved back to gauge your reaction, she instantly recognised the uncertainty in your expression. Her arm curled around your waist, her lips pressed a kiss to your shoulder, and she gave a reassuring smile. “I will be with you, I’m not going anywhere.”

Like always, she stuck to her promise. Not for a second did she leave your side as she celebrated, introduced you to her teammates, and hardly took her eyes off you. Some part of her was always touching you, whether that be her arm around your shoulders, her hand brushing against hers as a finger linked with yours, a palm resting on your lower back as she guided you through the bustling room. And though it took some time to settle into the crowdedness, you eventually found yourself joining in with her teammates as they danced and took you in like one of their own.

Throughout the night, the blonde midfielder couldn’t hold back the smile on her face. Watching you fit right in with the people she considered family, whilst knowing to some degree how much you struggled with these things, flooded her with so much admiration and appreciation for you. It reached a new level, and though it was something she didn’t understand, each second she spent with you she felt herself falling more and more in love. Even if you did say ridiculous things like…

“You know what my favourite thing is about football? When you guys sit there at the side with your little blankets like the grandparents from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.”

She might have rolled her eyes at the declaration, but somehow she adored you impossibly more after it. Especially when the group of her teammates you were with burst out laughing at it, some firing off into teasing arguments at it as you turned to Alexia and gave her a beaming smile at the reaction. Before any of the others could wrap you up in a conversation again, she simply took your hand like she did earlier and walked you both over to the bar. Mapi, who had been part of that group and had almost passed out from pure elation when she saw the pair of you walk in together at the start of the night, watched you leave and nudged Ingrid vigorously. The poor Norwegian had been subject to all of the defender’s speculation and conspiracies of what had transpired between her two friends, and the dark-haired woman wasn’t sure if it was that or the current overwhelming excitement of her girlfriend that was worse.

Alexia ordered new drinks for you both at the bar, before turning to where you stood beside her and smiling softly down at you. You entertained her gaze, mirroring her smile as you waited for her to speak. But instead of doing so, she moved to stand behind you and tugged you back against her while her arms enveloped you completely. Her chin found home on your shoulder, her heart bursting at the seams when she heard you let out a content sigh. She turned her face into your neck then, discreetly scattering kisses up and down the skin there.

“Ale, what are you doing? All your teammates are here.” You told her quietly, leaning back into her and covering her arms with yours.

“Me da igual. Tendrás que perdonarme por ser tan pegajosa, pero no puedo apartar los ojos ni las manos de ti.” Alexia murmured, reaching around to grab her glass and take a sip from it, before focusing her attention back to you by kissing you. Her lips were cold from the ice of her drink, but they quickly warmed up against yours as she indulged in the kiss without a care for her surroundings. It was only when your drink was placed on the wood of the bar that she broke it off, smirking down at you and the blush to your cheeks.

If this was how she was going to act, you didn’t want the night to end.

Fortunately for you, it didn’t. Something you had learnt over the years was that the Spanish knew how to have a good night, and this was no different. The music kept coming, the euphoria kept running, and the dancing didn’t stop for a second. As the hours went on, Alexia came more and more out of her shell, and you saw a new side of her that made you weak at the knees.

Her actions got bolder as her inhibitions left her, and if she was clingy before, that only increased. Even when she substituted her alcohol for water, as did you, her affection continued to pour out. You were more than happy to revel in all she had to give. This was what you had longed for since the summer, and it still felt surreal that you were here right now.

Seeing Alexia so carefree and happy sparked the same feelings in you, it willed you to be just as open and unabashed in your joy, and it was fastly turning into one of the best times of your life because of it. But there were other feelings too, ones that were becoming quite unavoidable as they built up throughout the evening. And when the celebrations somehow amped up, there was a certain level of acknowledgement between you and Alexia. Your eyes communicated that to each other, coy smiles shared between you both in anticipation.

The pair of you continued to dance together, none the wiser to the partying around you anymore. You were more than content to stay in your own little bubble, allowing the tense thrill to grow whilst waiting for the other to make the first move. Unsurprisingly, it was Alexia who cracked, her next actions conveying the desperation that fizzed between the two of you.

“I think I said I had to make it up to you after our first date, no?” She hummed from behind you, one arm around your stomach as the other brushed your hair from your neck so that she could attach her lips to your pulse as she awaited your answer.

“Yes. Please.” The second word slipped out unknowingly, only realising what you had said after Alexia smirked into your skin. Her confidence radiated from her, and you took it and ran with it. “Don’t act like you don’t need it too, la reina.”

“Don’t call me that.” She grumbled and you turned in her hold with a raised eyebrow, your arms linking around her neck.

“What would you like instead?” You challenged, feeling her hands tighten their grasp just slightly.

“You know. Ale. Alexia.” You hummed and nodded, leaning a little closer and kissing her jaw on your way to placing your lips beside her ear.

“And where would you prefer me to call you that? Here, in this club where you can hardly hear me with your friends all around? Or in your apartment, in your bed?”

It was that final question from you that had her breathing in sharply and leading you out of the club for the final time that night. Earlier, when you left in a rush, you were wracked with anxiety and self-doubt. Now, you laughed with the woman you loved as she flagged down a taxi and clambered in behind you. She listed off her address as you gazed meekly at her from your seat, heart eyes so glaringly obvious despite the dim light of the car. Granted, she could probably feel your stare more than she could see it, though there wasn’t much else that the midfielder wanted to focus her attention on.

She smirked and shook her head when she noticed, her hand travelling across the middle seat and reaching its destination on your thigh. You placed your own over it, squeezing it once and averting your eyes to the city’s scenery that passed by, unable to maintain your infatuated look due to the overloading feeling of ardour that reinforced itself every time the footballer was in your vicinity.

Throughout the car ride to Alexia’s apartment, it was majoritively silent, bar the deafening beating of your heart in your ears that grew in its volume the closer you got. The driver’s GPS sounded out as he parked outside the building, and Alexia rushed to pay him before getting out and offering her hand to you. You took it with a shy grin, swinging it between you both as you made your way inside.

Back at the club, the tension was palpable and unmistakably charged. However, it had taken a turn during the short journey. Now it was teeming with nerves, both aware of what faces you when you step foot in that apartment. There’s exhilaration and simmering desire too due to how much you want it, it was something that had been thought about individually late at night. Ultimately, this would add a whole new layer to the growing relationship, and neither of you wanted to wait a second longer to be able to savour the aftermath and the moment.

And in the end, it was inexplicably better than you could have imagined. Once the initial awkwardness wore off, the desperation took over and gave the night a tale to tell. You hadn’t experienced anything like it– it was tentative and ineffably intimate and something you wouldn’t forget. It was perfect.

Most importantly, it didn’t leave you in a pit of anxiety afterwards. Being able to freely relish in the moment when it was over in the comforting hold of the figure you loved so wholly was something you appreciated greatly. Words wouldn’t do it justice, what it meant to you. All you could do was return the benevolence handed to you on a silver platter and hope that Alexia understood the gravity behind your actions.

The sheets covered your sated bodies, you with your head on her chest as her arms held you securely and sincerely, and they rustled when she reached over into her bedside table for something. You leaned up a little in confusion, watching her curiously as she searched around the drawer, only to pull out the bane of your existence.

“What are you doing with that?” You asked humorously, nestling back down into the warm, sturdy body beneath you.

She had gotten out your book. With a hum, she opened it and flicked to the back page. There she found your number, written clearly just as you had told her.

“I don’t believe it.” Alexia mumbled, one of her fingers tracing the ink there. “It really was there.”

Quietly, without disrupting the serenity of the room that had settled, you took it from her hands and dropped it onto the table on your side. Then you turned back to her, brushing some strands of hair from her face as you rested upon your elbows and cupped her face. You looked at her with a pointed gaze, leaning down to place a slow, meaningful kiss to her lips, before pulling back.

“Forget about that. We’re here now.” You whispered, thumbs stroking softly over her cheekbones as she accepted your words, willing herself out of that regretful mindset. Because she had you, right where she wanted you.

“We’re here now.” She repeated with a loving smile, one you instantly reciprocated as you nodded at her response.

On a night like this, there wasn’t much else that needed to be said. So you laid back down then, on your side as Alexia copied your position with the covers pulled up to your shoulders, face to face and barely able to make out each other’s features in the dark room.

That book, the one you nervously handed over to Alexia back in Menorca, was possibly one of the most revealing things you had done. It didn’t quite go the way you expected it to go, but it didn’t matter in the end. You got the result you wanted and it was so much better than you anticipated. There was still a lot to learn, about each other and the lives you led, though nothing felt unaccomplishable now that you had Alexia on your team.

Alexia didn’t quite know when your book had moved from the top of the table into the drawer, but it probably had something to do with how much it hurt to look at. It still didn’t fill her with the best thoughts whenever she saw it. She had no doubts that you being with her now would change that. She could see herself reading it in the near future, with you on the opposite end of the sofa, your feet in her lap as she got a glimpse into your soul. New memories could be made with it, and even right now, despite the grievances she had with it, it was still something she treasured deeply and she knew that would only become more true as time went on.

In your current position, you could just make out how deeply she was looking at you. There were a lot of things swirling around those favourite eyes of yours, but it was the insecurities there that you hadn’t noticed previously which caught your attention. Wordlessly, you willed her to voice them, and she did.

“Things might get difficult sometimes.” She began, and you acknowledged it with a gentle nod and a kiss to the corner of her mouth. “There is… a lot that comes with my job that I do not enjoy. I am afraid it will come between us.”

You could only guess what she meant. Finding out exactly what that was, was a task for another day. Right now, she needed your belief and your assurances, you knew that.

“I don’t care about that. As long as you promise that I’ll have you, then I don’t care about anything else. I only need you, that’s all. The rest is just background noise.” You told her, pleased to see those doubts dissipate before you, her whole body language changing as it did.

“You do. You do have me. I promise.” Alexia stated firmly, quietly sighing out of relief and exhaustion.

The day was beginning to take its toll on her. It had been pretty packed, with a full game of fiercely competitive football, partying, a whole load of emotions, and the events afterwards that had gotten her to this point. Sleep didn’t come so easily to you, even after all that had happened. You gladly took the extra time to rake your eyes over Alexia’s face, who seemed so at peace as she began to drift off. There was a brief moment where you envied that fact, but you shoved that thought away as quick as it came, because that was the old you. There was a new version of you now, and it was one that did have the capability to experience that very same tranquillity that Alexia was in the midst of. And it was all down to her, the woman resting in your arms.

There was just one more thing you needed clarity about, and it unfortunately meant disturbing the blonde’s bliss, but it couldn’t wait.

“Ale, will you go on a date with me?” You asked shyly, waiting for her reaction with a grimace, for what reason you weren’t sure of. She chuckled under her breath and subtly shook her head, which was indeed not what you were looking for, until she spoke before you could panic.

“You really just asked that after we spent the evening together and had sex?”

Your hand covered her mouth immediately, though the damage was already done and she laughed at that fact.

“It was a simple question that needed a simple yes or no.” You attempted to come across as serious, but there was a smile already there as Alexia pulled your hand away and nodded.

Her lips found yours in what you thought could be deemed as the softest kiss in mankind, before she leans back just enough to be able to murmur her answer against your lips.

“You don’t have to ask.”

—

there's a bit of pressure and nerves that comes with writing a part two like this so i hope i took the right path with the plot and that it was worth the wait 🙃

#alexia putellas x reader #woso x reader #woso #woso community #alexia putellas one shot #alexia putellas #woso imagine #woso fic

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awearywritersworld · 10 months

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the boy spurned as evil and the girl of his youth

sukuna x reader w/c: .6k tags/warnings: angst, i'm afraid. young!sukuna. depictions of blood. ur dad's an asshole. fem!reader. no use of y/n. a/n: please check out the lovely artwork by @demonzaemon that inspired this piece!!! i'm definitely down to write a second part about a reunion, so let me know if that would interest anyone! masterlist read part two here

thinking about sukuna at 10 years of age— he's been abandoned by his family and scorned by his village because of the strange way he looks. he has to steal stale bread during the night to survive. he has to take shelter in the ruins of an abandoned home. he has to bear the harsh elements. he has to do it all alone.

that is, until he meets a curious little girl by the riverside during the spring. he'd found an old, frayed fishing net the day prior, and while he hopes to catch something he can eat for dinner, he catches your attention instead.

and you marvel at him as if he's the most remarkable thing you've ever laid eyes on. you're poking at the harsh lines that mar his skin. you're pulling at his pink hair because you're convinced it's fake. you're counting his arms as if the extra two will eventually disappear.

he doesn't mind though. he's too caught up in the fact that someone's touching him. that he can feel the warmth of your skin against his. he can hardly believe it when you scamper off, calling over your shoulder gleefully, "i'll meet you here again tomorrow!"

after that, everything changes and he finds himself in your company more often than not. you sneak your meals out of the house each day, even though your portions are meager. you bring him a few of your blankets, even though it means you're cold at night. what he appreciates most though? the fact you look at him like he's human.

then, what is simultaneously the best and worst night of his life happens. you fall asleep beside him in the overgrown grass near the river. its early autumn by now and the stars are twinkling in the sky, so your body clings innocently to his, seeking his warmth.

he takes the opportunity to study you in the moonlight. to commit every detail of your face to memory. he considers the fact that you feel safe enough to fall asleep beside him, even when every other person in the world has deemed him evil and sinister.

eventually he's lulled to sleep by your slow and gentle breaths, but not before coming to the decision that he is yours and you are his. and while you're the only thing in the world that the young boy has to his name, he's okay with that.

then, all too soon, he's awoken by yelling and it's not a moment later that you're ripped from his arms by your father. he's screaming about how you've defiled yourself by associating with such a despicable fiend.

"no, he's my friend! he's good!" you wail, your arms stretched toward sukuna in a plea for help. "don't let him take me! please!"

and he tries. he really, really tries. he runs after your father, beating at his back in an attempt to free you, but he's just too small. his body is weak from years of malnourishment. the older man pushes him to the ground with little effort and sukuna's palms slice open upon the sharp stones protruding from the earth.

crimson spills from the wounds, but he can hardly feel it. the ache in his chest is too consuming. too agonizing. it's unfair that such a little body should house so much pain, but that seems to be the story of his relatively short life.

so as he calls out to you, his voice broken and desperate, he knows it's the last time he'll ever see you and he's forced to come to terms with the universe's cruel edict— that he deserves to spend his life alone.

#m!writes #sukuna #sukuna x reader #sukuna imagines #ryomen sukuna #ryomen sukuna x reader #ryomen sukuna imagines #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk imagines #sukuna angst #ryomen sukuna angst #jujutsu kaisen angst #jjk angst

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spacerockfloater · 5 months

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Cassian had been eating an early breakfast with them this morning when Rhys had gotten the bill for Nesta’s night out. When Rhys had read each item aloud. Bottles of rare wine, exotic foods, gambling debts …

Oh, do shut the fuck up people. You’re acting as if Nesta requested three muscled, naked, oiled up, male sex workers come to her table and feed her whipped cream with their dicks. She ordered fucking food and drinks for fuck’s sake. The horror! You’re building a fifth mansion, you can afford to pick up the tab you cunts, especially after she fought your fucking war for you. Boo fucking hoo.

Feyre had stared at her plate until silent tears dripped into her scrambled eggs.

Now, what the actual fuck is this grown ass woman crying about? Bitch, pull your melodramatic self together. You’re acting as if Nesta made the front page of the local newspaper for being a serial killer. Calm the fuck down. Your husband is reading you a fucking bar’s bill, for crying out loud. A private bill, that was available only for you to see, until your toddler of a partner decided to let everyone know about it. Like, the only acceptable reason for you to shed a tear is realising you’re shackled to this piece of shit for eternity.

Cassian knew there’d been previous conversations—fights—about Nesta. About whether to give her time to heal herself, as they’d all believed would happen at first, or to step in. But as Feyre wept at the table, he knew it was a breaking of some sort. An acceptance of a hope failed.

Yes, because we all know that the only two ways of helping a traumatised person are either leaving them completely alone with their self destructive tendencies and excluding them from our lives (not a single painting of Nesta in Feyre’s home, pity job offers from Rhys, just superficial attempts of Feyre inviting Nesta to witness her perfect new life and house but no true attempts at connecting with her) or stripping them off of every bit of freedom and forcing them to do unpaid physical labour. Now every hope is obviously lost!

It had required all of Cassian’s training, every horror he’d endured on and off the battlefield, to keep that same crushing sorrow from his own face.

Cassian, for the millionth time, I hope someone throws your hypocritical ass in a deep fryer as soon as possible. Looking forward to Elain’s prophecy coming true.

Rhys had laid a comforting hand on Feyre’s, squeezing gently before he looked at Azriel, and then Cassian, and laid out his plan. As if he’d had it waiting a long, long while.

Rhysand, you sly, manipulative snake, you. You never fail to disgust me. Aiming to break your own fucking wife apart so that she, in her vulnerability, goes along with your pre-prepared schemes, while simultaneously acting as if you’re her shoulder to cry on when you’re in fact the reason she’s crying, is actually nauseating. And I thought Tamlin was the beast! Rhysand is the worst thing that ever happened to Feyre. At the very best, they deserve each other. And that’s me being generous.

#acotar #acosf #anti rhysand #anti cassian #anti feyre #anti feysand #anti inner circle #anti ic #pro nesta #fuck these guys

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f1letters · 2 years

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midnights (3am edition) - masterlist

A collection of stories inspired by lyrics of the one and only, miss Taylor Swift.

note: regarding the stories, some of them are not inspired by the entirety of the song but only by some loose verses (due to their content) PLEASE check the warnings before reading (as there are stories with some tw)

lavender haze | mv1 (2.8k)

"I been under scrutiny, you handle it beautifully"

summary: after winning his second championship in another controversial way, max needed her by his side more than ever as the media tried to tear him apart

maroon | cs55 (4.3k)

"how the hell did we lose sight of us again? sobbing with your head in your hands, ain't that the way shit always ends?"

summary: they both knew their relationship would ruin them both, but they couldn't stop themselves from running back to each other every goddamn time

anti-hero | cl16 (3.6k)

"I wake up screaming from dreaming, one day, I'll watch as you leaving"

summary: no matter how many times charles told her she was more than enough, this misogynistic world kept giving her reasons to run away (driver!reader)

snow on the beach | ls18 (3.2k)

"you wanting me tonight feels impossible, but it's coming down"

summary: nothing would ever compare to the feeling of simultaneously falling in love with each other

you're on your own, kid | pg10 (4.1k)

"I wait patiently, he's gonna notice me. it's okay, we're the best of friends"

summary: after what she thought was the best night of her life, she came to the realization that she was nothing but one more girl on his list

midnight rain | gr63 (3.1k)

"chasing that fame, he stayed the same, all of me changed like midnight"

summary: what happens when he decides his career will always be more important than their relationship?

question…? | ls18 (3.4k)

"did you wish you'd put up more of a fight when she said it was too much?"

summary: she was just planning a fun night out with her best friends, but an unexpected reunion changes everything

vigilante shit | pg10 x cl16 (3.4k)

"you did some bad things, but I'm the worst of them"

summary: revenge is served cold and it tastes especially sweet when it involves his best friend

bejeweled | ln4 (2.7k)

"and I miss you, but I miss sparkling"

summary: after a triple-header where they couldn't see each other, things got even stranger when her boyfriend seemed totally uninterested in spending time with her. so, she took matters into her own hands

labyrinth | aa23 (3.9k)

"uh-oh, I'm falling in love. oh no, I'm falling in love again"

summary: it's safe to say she wasn't expecting to fall in love so quickly after just ending a five-year relationship, but alex albon was just everything she needed without even realizing it (russell!reader)

karma | lh44 (3.6k)

"karma is the guy on the screen coming straight home to me"

summary: seeing her toxic ex was never fun, but maybe it was less fun for him when he realized she was currently dating the GP winner on the screen, who happened to be his favourite driver

sweet nothing | sv5 (3.0k)

"all that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing"

summary: after years of battling infertility, seb was still by her side. he didn't need anything else but her... but maybe their lives were about to get a little more crowded

mastermind | cs55 (3.8k)

"what if I told you none of it was accidental?"

summary: it all started when she saw him across the room and she knew right away she wouldn't give up until he was hers

the great war | dr3 (3.9k)

"my hand was the one you reached for all throughtout the Great War"

summary: after the media was filled with cheating rumours involving her husband, she faced hard times trying to rebuild what was left of their relationship

bigger than the whole sky | ms47 (2.9k)

"i'm never gonna meet what could've been, would've been, what should've been you"

summary: guilt consumed her alive when she lost the baby she initially didn't plan on having... maybe the outcome could've been better if she did something different, she thought

paris | eo31 (3.2k)

"romance is not dead if you keep it just yours"

summary: maybe their family and friends didn't understand all the secrecy of their relationship, but why risk ruining what they had when they lived happier than ever inside of their own bubble?

high infidelity | mv1 x ln4

"do I really have to tell you how he brought me back to life?"

summary: she knew it was a mistake getting involved with her boyfriend's best friend from the beginning, but she only realized how wrong it really was when she got confronted by the one person she should've been faithful to

glitch | ms47

"we were supposed to be just friends"

summary: they were supposed to be just friends with benefits, but things started to feel real when they found themselves travelling to each other constantly... behind her brother's back (vettel!reader)

would've, could've, should've | dr3

"and I damn sure never would've danced with the devil"

summary: when daniel thought his career was about to skyrocket in mclaren, he chose not to have anything to do with her anymore. two years later, regretting everything, he looked for her, only to find out she was a single mom to a beautiful curly-haired girl

dear reader | cl16 (2.8k)

"to a house, not a home, all alone cause nobody's there"

summary: when two strangers meet by fate in the same bar with the same goal - to drink their feelings - maybe they discover that they are actually two halves that fit together perfectly

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voidandabyssal · 5 months

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How would nightmare react to someone that helped him at his lowest

The s/o in question is as old as him maybe even older. The s/o met him when he was a child and sulking near the tree of emotions because everybody kept on hating him for being the protecter of negativity

The s/o took pity in him and decided to become his friend.

But even if nightmare now had a friend, he succumbed to negativity and ate the apple

The s/o at the time of corruption was going to hang out with him but instead saw him murder people mercilessly so they got scared and ran away.

And after hundreds of years of nightmare looking for the s/o throughout the multiverse, he met them helping dream instead of him.

I would like to know what Nightmare would do in that happens because my thoughts just left me at that

Nightmare:

The moment he takes a bite out of that apple is simultaneously the best and worst decision he had ever made. The feeling, the power, the justified revenge he got at the hands of the village was worth it

Even when his body tore apart at the seams and black goo burst from his cavitys. Tentacles bursting from his back. His teeth twisting and sharpening into painful reminders of his decision.

Until he saw you. You’re face twisted in horror, fear

He hated you. From that very second, overcome with negativity, he swore he wouldn’t forget your face. The emotions he pulled from you only strengthened him. Further empowering his shattered and remaking body.

You were supposed to be his friend! Someone who cared for him, who stuck by his side through even the worst of times.

you were exactly like the rest of the village.

You were using him! you only befriended him because of his status!

He’s so consumed with everything that you just manage to slip away from him. You just barely manage to escape, his sharp tentacles slicing your cheek open leaving a thin trail of blood behind.

When Nightmare snaps out of his rage. After the village had been destroyed, though he still feels the ache of that perceived betrayal he still wants you around.

Dream is gone, turned to a statue, and you are the only thing he has left.

He searches, and searches, and soon rips the village and surrounding lands apart as he looks for you.

He assumes you’re dead. Killed by him. He lets the negativity consume him once again. Forcing himself to relive the memories of your time together.

Hundreds of years pass, and Nightmare has mostly pushed you from his mind. Occasionally going on a rabid hunt throughout the multiverse in search of you. The desperate part of him, the part of him that could still be considered Passive, still believes you to be alive

He hates himself for that day, he wishes he had grabbed you, held you tight in his arms and stopped you from disappearing.

Constant battles between him and his brother and that newfangled ‘star sanses’ keep him from finding you. Constantly bothered by Dreams desperate pleas to be able to find you.

He holds nothing back, lashing out with every ounce of aggression.

Then he finally sees you. Older, more mature. Still as beautiful as he last saw you.

You were wrapping the wounds of one of Nightmares victims. Regret poured out from you as you remembered the last time you saw him.

Before you can dwell on past regrets, Nightmare sneaks in. Watching on in jealousy as you care for the injured.

You leave the injureds home, when you feel Nightmares tentacles wrap around you and tug you towards him.

The grip is tight, almost painfully so. Every time you struggle he holds you tighter, wrapping his arms around you in a tight hug

“You’re here… you’re really here” he mutters, tucking your hair behind your ear.

He fixates on the scar on your cheek, a reminder of Nightmares attack.

He presses a kiss, one as gentle as he can manage. On top of it.

A silent ask for forgiveness.

You can struggle as much as you want, but Nightmare will never let you go.

The two of you disappear into the void. Nightmare taking you to his home.

You are kept careful hidden away. Like a precious gem in a dragons hoard.

He will tend to your every need, keep you safe and locked away from any would be meddlers.

He won’t let you out of his sight until Nightmare is sure you won’t leave. Even then, he keeps a carful eye on the people around you.

You’ll come to love the new him eventually. You don’t have a choice

#i was inspired as soon as i saw this #nightmare sans x reader #nightmare x reader #dreamtale #undertale #undertale au #sans x reader #undertale headcanons #voidimagines

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gene-nine · 1 month

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night at the museum (j.p x fem!reader)

hi !!! this is my first pic post so please don't bully me.

pairing: james potter x reader

synopsis: your good friend james invites you to go on an "unauthorized" trip to the museum with your friends.

warnings: not proofread :)

words: 2385

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you knew James Potter. everyone did.

only, you had the ‘wonderful privilege’ (as he liked to call it) of being his friend. this duty of yours involved watching quidditch games you didn’t particularly care about all that much (with Remus as decent company), struggling to pay attention in class because all this kid does is talk, and, as you’ve found yourself now, going on adventures through the city outside Hogwarts.

when James first started apparating off the Hogwarts campus with Sirius, you had told him he was an idiot and that he was going to get in trouble. after the fifth or sixth time, you became intrigued. even Remus and Peter had begun accompanying them, which meant that it wasn’t entirely the wreckless free-for-all that usually followed Sirius and James around. James hadn’t ever actually invited you to go with, but he hadn’t invited Lily, Marlene, or Mary either, so maybe it was just a guy thing. regardless, you started (not so subtly) asking James about what kind of stuff they did when they went out.

“and why are you suddenly so interested?” James chuckles quietly from beside you in potions. you were supposed to be taking notes, but you had stopped listening a while ago.

“you guys always come back so talkative and happy, i was just wondering what you got up to.” you feign being nonchalant, looking up at the chalkboard for the first time in 10 minutes and scribbling something down in your notebook. you can’t let him know that he’s been the more academically productive person between the two of you.

“i mean, usually we just go to bars. we followed Remus to a few bookstores one time. Sirius found an antique shop he liked, bought a jacket there once,” he whispers back, still taking notes, “why? jealous you haven’t been invited?” he taunts, a shit-eating grin on his face.

“no. i was just curious.” you roll your eyes, but it’s no use. he knows you’re interested.

“what happened to ‘you’re going to get caught, James’ or ‘this is such a stupid idea, i can’t believe Remus is going along with it’?” he mocks in his best (worst) impression of you. you scoff in annoyance.

“nevermind, sorry i asked.” you raise your hands slightly in surrender.

“we were actually going to go this weekend. Lily said there’s a cool museum out there and Remus seemed excited. wanna go?” he finally looks in your direction, raising his eyebrows with a smirk. you can’t help the smile that creeps onto your face.

“sure. but only if the other girls are invited. i don’t want to have to babysit.” you can’t let his ego get too high, knowing you wanted to go with him. he mutters back, something between a ‘mhm’ and ‘yeah right’. the rest of the lecture goes by in silence and you can finally focus, except for the incessant thump on the leg of your chair as James swings his feet (an annoying habit you’ve grown to ignore).

by the time the weekend rolls around, the museum was all you, Lily, and Remus could talk about. apparently, it opened in the early 1600s and has roughly 20,000 paintings (statistics that Lily had found in some library book). you were more excited to get out of the stuffy castle, the fall air not quite making it through the stone walls.

James insisted upon leaving the castle at 7:00 a.m., claiming that’s the best time to apparate without McGonagall seeing you. James and Remus were at the meeting spot at 7 sharp, with you, Lily, Marlene, and Mary arriving shortly after, and Sirius and Peter getting there at 7:10. the feeling of apparating never improved. it felt as if every molecule of your being was shrunk down and shoved forwards simultaneously. even though you’re apparating by holding onto James (you have yet to learn how to on your own), you’re still terrified of getting splinched. no matter how many times he assures you it won’t happen.

you appear a few blocks away from the museum, all a part of James’ plan supposedly. as the group walks, James slows to walk beside you.

“pretty cool, huh?” that cocky grin on his face taunting a silent ‘i told you so’. he earns a gentle shove, but there’s nothing fake about your excitement. you hadn’t spent a lot of time outside of Hogwarts during the actual school year, and the fall season is certainly not disappointing. despite the early hour, there are people walking on the sidewalks in scarves and boots. some carry a warm drink in hand, and James can hardly miss the way your excitement peaks at the sight of a dog and their owner passing by. it feels more magical than the school grounds ever did.

“it’s incredible.” you reply genuinely. you can’t even think of a banter-ish comment to respond with. James swings an arm around your shoulders casually as the group is about to cross the street towards the steps of the museum.

“just you wait.” he whispers in your ear and you smile wide.

one thing you hadn’t expected from a Muggle museum was security. Wizarding museums didn’t need any, all the protective measures were covered with magic-blocking spells and tracking enchantments on every person and work of art in the building. but this museum had metal detectors and security guards the moment you walked in. even though security gave the group a long look (an even longer one at Sirius), you were able to get through without any problems. once your day passes were bought, you were off.

Lilly drags the group to go see a painting about Romeo and Juliet she had read about. it took one gross comment from Sirius about the ‘nakedness’ of Juliet before Marlene grabbed the collar of his jacket and dragged him off into another section. museum guidebook in hand, Mary leads the group to a section of landscape paintings by some artist named Francis Lynch.

“says here he completed nearly a hundred works before his untimely death in 1825 when he was bludgeoned to death by his wife...” Peter reads from over Mary’s shoulder, “cheery.”

“she probably went crazy from all the paint fumes in the house.” James snorts from beside you, earning an elbow to the ribs.

“hey! this one looks just like you, Prongs!” you exclaim to James, pointing at another painting of a doe in a meadow.

“if this is your way of telling me i’m majestic and a natural beauty, then compliment taken.”

“you wish.”

you wander off, loosely following the group through the giant rooms. you stop in front of a huge painting called Orpheus and Eurydice. it depicts Orpheus reaching for a glowing Eurydice as she’s pulled back down to Hades.

“remind me how this myth goes again?” a voice asks from behind you. you turn to see James, staring up at the painting with the same look of amazement you had been showcasing a few moments prior.

“Orpheus travels to the underworld to beg Hades to let his soulmate, Eurydice, leave and return to life. Hades agrees, but only if Orpheus can lead her out without turning around to make sure she is still following.” you explain. you had always been interested in greek mythology, and James is often nosy about what you’re reading.

“and Orpheus turns around.” he adds, “i don’t understand, though. why would Hades give Orpheus a challenge he so easily could have completed? you know, if he wasn’t a loser.” you snort.

“i don’t know. i think it’s the perfect impossible challenge. Hades knew he wouldn’t have bee able to do it if it was him and Persephone. plus, if Orpheus didn’t love her enough to turn around, he wouldn’t have loved her enough to go to Hades in the first place.” you’re both silent for a moment.

“would you? turn around, i mean. if it was the love of your life.” James air quotes that last part.

“i don’t know. would you?” you turn to face him.

“i don’t know.” he responds simply. you both pause for a moment to stare up at the painting that outdates you both by centuries. you slowly shift your gaze to the boy next to you. his hair is messy from him constantly trying to fix it everytime a girl his age walks by. his Gryffindor sweater sleeves are pulled down over his hands slightly due to the low temperature in the museum. his glasses are still slightly tilted on his face from his most recent prank that pissed off the Slytherin Quidditch captain, who then punched him in the face. Pomfrey was able to fix his nose up just fine while his messed up glasses rested in his pocket. Magic could only fix them so much, so now they fit his face all weird (you still think it’s endearing). you eventually realize that you’re staring and decide you need a change of scenery.

“come on, lets go see the sculptures. i need to see something not two-dimensional.” you grab James’ hand and take off towards a staircase going upward. you practically skip up the stairs before James has to tell you to slow down. still walking hand in hand, arms swinging obnoxiously, you two peruse through the sculptures. some are abstract, and you can see James trying to figure them out, his head tilting to the side with his tongue sticking out slightly before giving up and moving to the next. you can hear Marlene and Lily yelling at Sirius for something in the room next to you, so you head in there. turns out he had tried using a transfiguration spell on a ceramic tiger. Remus, Mary, and Peter weren’t far away, assessing some sculpture made from wood and nails. you drop James’ hand and skip over to Lily, throwing your arms around her shoulders from behind.

“how goes it?” you ask, casting an amused glance at Sirius, whose wand has been confiscated by Marlene.

“other than Sirius trying to cause a mauling in the museum and Peter nearly knocking over a multi-million dollar vase, pretty okay.” she responds, “i got to see the Ophelia painting i was interested in.” she adds excitedly.

“i showed Moony a painting of a wolf-looking creature and he was not amused.” Mary adds from her spot at the wood sculpture.

“can we just visit the gift shop already?” Sirius whines. at this point, you all had been walking around for the better part of an hour and to be totally honest, the gift shop had been at the back of your mind the whole time. after a chorus of enthusiastic agreement from everyone, Mary leads the group to the bottom floor where the shop is (she won’t let anyone else use her map). once in the gift shop, everyone disperses. Peter goes looking for the station where he can fill up a little velvet bag with tumbled rocks. Marlene finds an umbrella with the pattern of a famous painting on it. Lily and Mary find t-shirts with the name of the museum on the front and a painting on the back. Remus finds a pin to put on his bag and a set of museum postcards. Sirius gets a stuffed animal dinosaur with a museum branded backpack on it. Last but not least, you and James get matching green dad hats with the museum name embroidered on the front.

flaunting the new merch, James leads the group (with you on his back) out the doors and back into the autumn air. Mary convinces a random woman to take a group picture of you all in front of the museum on her new camera. she excitedly hands the camera to Peter to take a picture of her and Lily in their matching t-shirts before taking it back and taking a picture of you and James with your hats. despite your protests, James won’t put you back down, but insists upon giving you a piggy-back ride all the way to the café he wanted to hit up before he left.

he finally sets you down as you all enter the café. the orders are as follows: James gets one hot black coffee, Lily gets a chai latte, Marlene gets an iced green tea, Mary gets a hot earl gray tea, Peter gets an iced coffee, you get an iced matcha, and Sirius insists he isn’t thirsty but orders a chocolate chip muffin. drinks (and muffin) in hand, everyone wanders down the sidewalk towards the bookstore Remus likes which happens to be next to the antique shop Sirius enjoys. everyone splits up, Remus, you, James, and Lily entering the bookshop and the rest following Sirius. Remus and Lily disappear into the classics section while you wander towards fiction and fantasy. James follows you through the shelves, picking up random books and scanning over the synopsis before putting them back. you decide against getting anything and head outside while James checks in on Remus. eventually, James joins you and you both wait outside for everyone else to be done.

tired from all your adventures, everyone decides to apparate back to Hogwarts (Remus a few books heavier). the evening ends with everyone sat in the common room talking around the fireplace, James next to you with your legs slung over his lap as you lay against the arm of the couch.

“was that worth whatever punishment you might’ve gotten for going?” James teases to you, knowing damn well how much fun you had.

“shut up.” you retort back, not able to hide the smile on your face. James shifts a bit on the couch to grab something from Remus’ bag on the floor.

“oh yeah, got this for you,” he says casually as he hands you a hardcover book. it’s a book on the Orpheus and Eurydice myth. “figured you could figure out for yourself whether you’d turn around or not.” James’ smirk is unmistakable in the firelight. you’re not sure whether the heated feeling in your face is from the fire or from James. you flash him an appreciative smile.

“careful Prongs, someone might think you actually listen to me when i talk.” you half joke, looking over the book’s front pages.

“who says i dont?”

#james potter #james potter x reader #james potter x you #marauders #harry potter #james potter fic #james potter x fem!reader #james potter blurb #the marauders era

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mypimpademia · 1 year

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— It’s Worse to Be Nothing

Bakugo x gn! Reader

Synopsis: Based on the song “Promise” by Laufey. Katsuki can’t help but reminisce on his past relationship with you, no matter how bad it was.

TW: Angst, swearing, mentions of (verbal) fighting, toxic relationship, relationship break up

NO MATTER HOW HARD KATSUKI TRIED, HE COULDN’T ACT LIKE HE DIDN’T CARE. He’s always been one to fake his feelings, but you made him betray that mask. He hated that about you, and it made him hate you. But he loved you so much more than he ever cared to admit.

Everything about the vulnerability you made him feel made his heart melt and and his blood boil. Kindness was never his strong suit, and the weakness you made him feel did nothing to help that.

He was a brute, to be frank. You wanted to believe that he loved you, you could feel it. But his words spoke louder than any action he could throw out to counteract them.

He’d pick and he’d poke, till your heart bled and you couldn’t take it anymore. Annoying, clingy, dumbass, among other things that he’d call you on a consistent basis, even when he swore he’d never do it again.

But it takes strength to date him in the first place, and you’d bite and you’d bark back just as hard. You’d hit him where it hurts, probably hurting him more than he hurt you. But if he wanted to play the tough guy card, then so be it.

You never said anything he didn’t already know, but that made it worse. You saw all these flaws in him that he constantly tried to hide from the world, and still loved him for them. And in the end, you hated him for them as well.

He was rude, an asshole even, arrogant, loud mouthed, foul mannered, and all around disrespectful. And he knew that, he knows that. He’ll never find anyone that would love him despite all this, not after you. Even if he did, they’re not you.

Katsuki is not perfect like he pretends to be, he makes more mistakes than he’d ever like to admit. His worst mistake was kicking up one too many arguments with you.

A bad day at work, a cold dinner, muddy and bloodied boots, the moon at its peak in the night sky, it was all too much. All you did was ask for communication, and to this day he wished he had the skills for it then.

Maybe he wouldn’t have screamed at you, maybe you wouldn’t have screamed at him. Maybe you wouldn’t have said packed that suitcase, maybe he wouldn’t have asked you where the fuck you were going. Maybe you wouldn’t have thrown your promise ring in his face, maybe you wouldn’t have left.

Just maybe, if he was a better man. Maybe if he was better to you. So many possibilities, so many standards he couldn’t, and may never, meet.

Your relationship was a dumpster fire at its best, and it hurt you both more than anything. But it’s worse to be nothing with you.

If Katsuki could count the amount of times he’s attempted to plan out how to win you back, he’d be ashamed. Because in every mentally mapped attempt, possibly even every universe, it never works out. You’d never last together.

But if you did, someway, somehow, he would take it. He’d take any berating from you, kill for him or kill him, and he’d love you all the same. It’s desperate and pathetic, but you don’t even have to love him back. As long as you live, and even after, he will always love you.

You are simultaneously the best and worse thing to ever happen to Katsuki, and he wishes he could let go.

—

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httpiastri · 3 months

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that podium was the simultaneously best and worst thing to ever happen to me bcs so many pretty boys but where do i look?????

#so much to think about #so much happened #paul and ollie talking like theyre little boys back in prema again #ollie and pepe pics :(#paul spin #idk just. everything #the best day of my life #f2 #formula two #formula 2 #pepe marti #ollie bearman #paul aron

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pugh-bug · 4 months

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No.42 Chapter 5

Art Donaldson x reader slow burn friends to lovers

As always I hope you enjoy! 🍉✨ My taglist is always open

Part 4

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‘Pass me the sauce now bitch!’

Patrick responded by throwing a pillow at your head. Mature.

‘You’d never talk to Art like that.’ He looked amused for a moment, a smirk brewing as his eyes darted from Art’s face to yours. The three of you were eye deep in miso sauce, spring rolls and pad thai - Art’s treat. It was almost strange, seeing Art eat take out in your cosy flat knowing he probably had a maid growing up. You’d once heard Liam say Art’s parents place was obnoxiously bigger than even Tashi Duncan’s, as if you needed further convincing of his affluence.

Still, he was settled. He seemed it. He always thanked you for washing up or tidying, if he wasn’t offering or doing it himself, as if he was content with living lesser than his other peers. Of course they all had maids for the sort of things you and Patrick did, or pretended to do on lazy days, but Art never announced judgement. Besides his constant bantering with Patrick and the occasional dig at you for not being too sporty, Art was always pleasant. Pleasant or impressively good at bottling things in.

‘That’s because Y/N,’ Art raised his eyebrow at Patrick’s smirking face. ‘Actually has manners, she just doesn’t waste them on you.’ The pair beamed at each other, as they always did when they were ‘arguing’ over you. It was almost expected for you now, owed even. You loved it.

——————————————————————

‘I don’t get this movie, why’s it just talking?’

You’d decided to put ‘When Harry Met Sally’ on as a break from the constant tennis. The background drum of your life had become the incessant whacking of tennis balls, if it didn’t make Art so content you’d have quickly deleted SkySports.

Patrick half watched half texted his now ex girlfriend back, to your dismay. It wasn’t long before he’d finished his food, shovelling it in like an animal as always, and announced he was going to bed. He ruffled your hair in his brotherly way before returning to his room. The door had barely closed before Art paused the movie from his spot on the floor.

‘Do you agree?’

You looked down at Art’s inquisitive face and the charming face of 80s Meg Ryan, knowing what he meant. Harry had just made his ‘men and women can’t be friends’ speech. You shoved the blanket off your hot legs to escape the extra heat and settled into your couch position comfortably.

‘Do you see me fucking Pat?’

Art grinned widely, almost boyishly, at your remark. You noticed he seemed to get almost giddy whenever you were a little crude, like you both intimidated and entertained him simultaneously. He hung his head, still smiling, before shaking it. ‘No but just - just tell me. I wanna know what you really think.’

No man ever wanted to know how you really thought more than Art. He’d asked you more about your beliefs and emotions than a reporter on the cusp of ‘making it big’. You seemed almost to be his scoop, his challenge, his big win but you wondered what would happen when you ran out of answers.

He was waiting for you to speak. Eager. You cast your mind back to all of your past male friendships, the times they hit on you unexpectedly or bullied you to ‘flirt’ or worst of all: told you they’d never seen you as a friend at all. That one always hurt. Most of those friendships had hurt and most of them had left Patrick waving the ‘not all men’ flag proudly as he stood victorious. The last man standing. Your last good, platonic best friend.

‘You can ask all you want Donaldson, I don’t see Patrick that way.’

He wasn’t completely satisfied with your answer, or he made sure he wasn’t just to encourage his own bad behaviour.

‘Not once? You’re telling me you two never had too much to drink or got dared? Not even spin the bottle when you were like 14?’

‘Sorry to disappoint.’

He looked elated and horrified all at once. The man was desperate and for a moment you couldn’t tell if he was devastated more for Patrick or for you.

‘What made you turn the poor guy down?’

Oh. For Patrick.

‘What makes you so sure he asked me out? Didn’t you watch the movie?’

Art finished his last spring roll, shaking his head. ‘I watched the movie that said ‘men and women can’t be friends’ a hundred times.’ He crossed his legs, his baggy t shirt exposing his collarbone. Ashamed as you were, you couldn’t deny the urge you had to just bite and kiss him. That made your following question all the more ironic.

‘So you don’t think men and women can just be friends?’

You made sure to ask it in such a way that implied he was wrong, foolish for believing something so immature despite your very thoughts proving him right.

‘I think if she’s attracted to guys and he likes girls it can’t ever be just a friendship. Sorry.’

‘Hmm.’

You listened to the sad sound of Patrick’s fan fighting for its life against the heatwave. Every time you and Art had a moment of silence the whir of the fan provided ambience.

‘You wanna wash up?’ Art asked, as if he was offering a special treat of some kind and not your least favourite task of all time.

‘Not even a little bit.’

That was when he did it, what until that point only Patrick had been honoured enough to do, he ruffled your hair. A small gesture? Absolutely. One you’d forget? Unlikely.

Once Art was elbow deep in washing up liquid he asked you a question he’d been longing to ask you for days. Did you enjoy living with him?

‘Of course I do.’ You couldn’t help but scoff at his question. Was he truly that insecure? Still, you revelled in messing with him a little - just for fun. ‘I’m happy for Pat, he always wanted a boyfriend to move in. He finally committed.’ That earned you a splash of noodle water to the face. A long pause followed, one that lead you to believe it was time for bed.

‘I am grateful,’ Art sighed, his voice low and his eyes down. ‘I know I could have asked my parents to get me my own place but …’ You watched him stop scrubbing the plate in his hand all together, his eyes unfocused. ‘I don’t like being alone.’

With his back to you, Art stacked the pots with intense precision. You weren’t sure what to say except:

‘Who does?’

Chapter 6

Masterlist

Taglist: @gatorgirl007 @imblushingrn @soy-garbage

#art donaldson fan fic #challengers art donaldson x reader #art donaldson fanfiction #challengers art donaldson #art donaldson fic #art donaldson fanfic #art donaldson x reader #art donaldson friends to lovers #art Donaldson x reader friends to lovers #art Donaldson x reader slow burn #art Donaldson slow burn #art donaldson series #no.42

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lovingperfectionsblog · 1 year

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For What It's Worth - Chapter 2

Chapter 2: The Plan is formulated.

Max Verstappen x Reader.

Chapter Summary: Max finally sees the flowers that lead to his downfall and reluctantly helps his best friend come up with a plan to find out who sent them.

Warnings: Swearing.

Word Count: 2736.

Author's Note: Please forgive me for this taking so long. Life happens I guess. I have als decided I am probably going to be making the chapters slightly shorter, because yeah, just something fun and silly. Can’t wait to hear your guys thoughts On all of this <3

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

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“I mean, they’re flowers?” Both you and Max stood above the bunch resting on the table, the note lying just below them, conveniently placed upside down so it couldn’t be read. Max couldn’t help but feel that the florist's logo was taunting him. His hand gripping the back of the chair that he was leaning on, itching to turn the card over to silence its taunts. The only thing worse would be what was on the other side of the card. He couldn’t look at that. His own words, his confession staring back at him.

“They’re my favourite flowers.” Your stance mimicked Max’s, only now you were looking at him. You watched as he slowly nodded his head, not in recognition of being told new information, but instead a nod of confirmation. “So I assume you told him which flowers to get then?”

It was accusatory, you were egging him to confess that he knew who had sent the flowers. “I didn’t tell anyone these were your favourite flowers.” He still hadn’t looked at you, eyes willing the note to catch fire.

“But you knew these were my favourite flowers?” He could feel the sweat starting to drip down the side of his face where you were burning a hole with your eyes.

“In my defence, everyone knows these are your favourite flowers, I didn’t need to tell anyone because you cannot keep any personal information to yourself.” This was the first time he looked at you and he couldn't help but feel a smile tug at his lips as he caught sight of the scandalised look on your face.

“Don’t lie, I am very good at keeping secrets, thank you very much.” You shoved Max’s shoulders, you couldn’t help but notice how his arms tensed under the force, which helped him barely even move from his position.

“You’re good at keeping other people's secrets, your own though? You’re an open book.” It was a matter of fact and he knew you knew he wasn’t wrong, your silence and scowl confirming exactly what he had just said.

“So you didn't tell him?” As he shook his head in response, he was simultaneously confused and slightly insulted that you hadn’t assumed it was him. Had you completely written him off as a viable option considering the fact that you both worked together?

“Have you read the note?” There was absolutely no chance that he was going to read what was on that note, and anyway, he already knew exactly what was written and what was meant to be written, his name.

“I don’t need to read the note.” It sounded childish coming out, even he knew that, but he really really did not need to read that note, especially not in front of you.

“Read the note Max.” You reached forward to turn it over, and there were the words, His words, mocking him even more violently than that logo had.

The WDC means nothing if I don’t have a woman like you by my side.

They could cheer my name in those stands until the end of time, but the only name I’d ever recognize myself having is “yours”.

Even on that podium, in front of a sea of people, only when I see you, do I truly feel like I have something worth celebrating.

You are my calm, my favourite feeling, my safe space, I can only hope that I can be yours as well?

“Do you think he was asking me out?” Your voice pierced through the ringing in his ears, his brain inundated with criticism of why this was the worst love note he could have possibly written. It had seemed cute at the time, the F1 theme and all made sense, he was a WDC, you worked for him in F1, you had met because of F1, kind of, sort of, he didn’t like to dwell on that moment too much, but now, the note seemed awful. It seemed like a cliche.

And worst of all, you didn’t even understand that he was asking you to be his girlfriend. Could he have fucked this up any more than he already had?

Thank God he had forgotten his name.

“I think he was probably asking you out,” he took a quick glance your way before continuing, testing the waters, “I think he might have been asking you to be his girlfriend?”

Why the fuck were you scrunching your face like that?

“He is not asking me to be his girlfriend.” The scoff you added at the end had Max feeling a lot more offended than he was allowed to show in this situation.

“Of course he’s asking you to be his girlfriend. Look at the last line.” Max shoved the note in your direction, making sure to only briefly touch the card.

“Who asks someone to be their girlfriend without signing their name?” You shoved the card back.

“A fucking idiot.” Him.

“Which could be any driver on this grid.” He hated how smug you looked right now, especially because it was him. He was the idiot. No one else on that grid would have done something this stupid. Just him.

“And you want me to help you?” You frantically nodded along, “You want me to find you an idiot to date?” Max felt the entire air of the room shift, and yes, he can admit that maybe he had said that a little harshly, but he wasn't expecting you to look so deflated at the comment.

“Well, yeah, I mean, he clearly either pays attention to me or he went out of his way to make the effort and like, yeah, I know that maybe it’s the bare minimum, but I don’t know if you can tell, but it’s not exactly like I date a lot.” You had stopped looking directly at him and Max, for the first time, had noticed that you were a little embarrassed by the confession.

“You should date more.” Me. You should date me. More. Well, you should start. Is what Max wanted to say.

“Of course, if only it was that easy, you know, all things considered.” You laughed along to your own joke as you began moving around your hotel room, grabbing your jacket which had been previously strewn on the bed, slowly ushering Max out of the room with you so you could leave.

“Considering what?” Max shut the door behind him and quickly fell in step with you, making your way down the hall.

“You know? All the travel? Being the assistant to the big bad Max Verstappen?” You stopped in front of the elevator, waiting for it to reach your floor.

“Big Bad Max Verstappen?” What did your dating life have to do with you being his assistant?

“You do know men will not get near me because of the fact that we are together constantly. There have been a lot of rumours of us dating Max. How do you not know this?”

He hated how proud he felt. He truly hated how good this all made him feel, but yeah, he wanted everyone to know that you were his. Well, not yet, but you were going to be his girlfriend.

Eventually.

Hopefully.

“Hurry up, you’re going to be late!” He had noticed that you were already at the hotel doors, waiting for him to catch up and so he had broken out into a jog to catch up with you.

“Yeah, well, maybe they should stay away.” Wrong this for him to say, but he was proud of it.

“Why? So you can just keep me as your assistant forever?” You laughed as you slid into the car, losing Max;s eyesight.

“You do realise you’re also my best friend right? Like, my best friend in the whole wide world?” He started the car and pulled into traffic.

“You’re the one who hired me Max, and plus, it’s a race weekend. I’m your friend after hours.” He hated that you put your feet on the dash.

“Probably should have never done that.” You let out a laugh that filled the car, but you would never know how serious he actually he was.

Every part of him regretted hiring you. If he hadn’t then maybe he could have you in the paddock with him as his girlfriend instead. A girlfriend he could hug and kiss publically and not be the creepy fucking boss.

“Getting sick of me already?”Max countered, willing himself not to look at you while he was driving. He always found himself having to do exactly this.

“I could never get sick of you Maxie” He knew you were teasing him, but he’d be lying if he said that one sentence didn't mean the world to him too.

“If you’re going to be cheeky, you can always just quit.”

“Fine.”

“No.”

You barked out your laugh and he couldn’t help but mimic it, mostly from relief though. He was embarrassingly reliant on you, and not even as his assistant, although, yeah, as his assistant too, but it was mainly as his friend.

“You saying you need me there Maxie.” More teasing.

“Yes.” He chose to be completely honest with you.

He could feel your eyes on him, his hands gripping the steering wheel just ever so slightly tighter, making the final turn towards the track.

“Yeah, I need you too.” It was a whisper, he was almost certain he wasn’t meant to hear it, but he did. Maybe there was still a chance.

The rest of the ride was silent, comfortable, both of you letting the confessions sit in the air, allowing you both to breathe them in.

The next time either of you speak, you’re making your way into the paddock, the nerves of the season finally seeping in as the first real day of the race weekend begins.

“So, I’ve come with a plan.” You shuffled through the gates, Max following close behind.

“A plan for what?” Max tried to wrack his brain for what could possibly need a plan of action for the weekend, “There's? Wait, that's for PR and my strategist?”

“Max, no, a plan to figure out who sent the flowers.” You shot Mx a confused look, wondering how he had already forgotten about the conversation from this morning.

“Oh.” Fuck, this again.

“So,” You either didn’t notice or just chose to ignore his disinterested reaction as you carried on updating him on what you had come up with, “I’m making a list of each driver on the grid you it could possibly be,” you looked to Max, waiting for his nod before you would continue, “And then kind of, seducing him to maybe,”

“No.”

You looked at Max after the sharp instruction left his mouth. His face was hard set, jaw clenched, eyes forward as he tried to keep his cool.

“Well, how else am I meant to figure out who it was if I don't,”

“If you say the word seduce again, you’re fired.” He’d fire you purely so he could date you, he’d fire you to get you out of this paddock and away from the other drivers immediately, he would do anything to not have to watch you seduce anyone other than him.

“Well what should I do then?” The slap of your arms against your thighs after you dropped them in frustration was enough to finally draw Max’s full attention back to you and what he found was you waiting for an actual idea from him.

He was going to have to help the woman he loves figure out how to seduce other men. His friends.

If anything happens between any of them, he was a little nervous that he was going to take them out on the track.

He was losing his mind.

“Maybe just go up and ask them?” They’d say no, Max would be happy and then he could figure out how to actually get you. Maybe he should seduce you.

No, that’s what the flowers were, and then he’d still be the creepy boss.

“And embarrass myself? No way.”

“And you won’t do that while trying to seduce them?” he faked a laugh as you shoved him away from you.

“Firstly, you’ve never seen me seduce anyone, I'm excellent at it, and secondly, I bet I could have you on your knees with my seduction skills so don’t laugh.” Max felt his entire face heat up at the thought of being on his knees for you. He most certainly wasn’t laughing now.

“Who exactly would you be seducing?” He could get around this. There was always going to be a way for him to get around this. The guys all knew how he felt about you. Surely none of them would fall for any of this, so why not entertain it for a little bit while he figures out what his next move is.

“I knew you’d come around to it! Okay, so I was thinking we should start with Daniel.” Max was going to throw up.

“Daniel?” No, all of this was a bad idea. No.

“Yeah, I don’t know, he was kind of like, looking at me last night, and when we were walking back inside he had his hand on my lower back and like, you know?” If he wasn’t so angry he would have noted how cute the blush looked on your cheeks, but no, he was furious. Daniel knew how he felt and now he was doing all of this? He needed to talk to Daniel, put him in his place when it came to you.

But, he also does all of this to you? Why was he excluded from the potential pool of drivers interested in you?

“So Daniel, then Lando, Carlos,” you continued in lieu of Max responding to your suspicions about Daniel, “then there’s Yuki, George and Lewis.”

“This list is getting pretty long.” God, even Max knew he sounded pathetic with that comment.

“Shut up, there’s a lot of options on that grid.” You grabbed a cup of coffee as you continued rambling on to Max, “and finally, Charles and Pierre.”

“What, not considering me then?” You giggled at his comment, despite how serious he was being, unbeknown to you.

“Probably a little unprofessional to flirt with my boss.” Please, please flirt with me, it’s all Max could think about as you placed the cup of coffee in front of him. “So, what do you think?” You sipped on your cup, waiting for Max to give some decent input.

“It's a list.” The coffee tasted awful.

“Max, please, I just want a shot at love too.” Your voice was too soft, too honest. If Max wasn’t such a coward, this would have been his moment to tell you that you’ve always been loved by him, for too long for him to still be keeping it a secret, but he loved every part of you, in every scenario, in every way. And he was going to love you through this too.

“Okay, so, when do you start seducing Daniel.” Your smile was beaming at him, but he couldn’t help how heartbroken he felt at knowing it was because you were going to try and get another man, one that wasn;t him, one that he considered one of his best friends.

“Well, he’s here this weekend, so why not this Grand Prix?” Your smile had turned from bright to sly and Lord knows Max really really wanted to see that smile in a very different context, where he was the one you were thinking about. Maybe even if you two were alone, in his hotel room, which is exactly what could have happened if the whole thing with the flowers had actually gone how he had planned it. Instead, here you were, thinking about his friend, who he was going to kill and help you flirt with.

In his entire life, out of everything he had ever endured, this was the most defeated he had ever felt, but if it made you happy, well then,

“Yeah, this Grand Prix it is.”

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