#it’s giving kingdom hearts speech vibes

[nc-vb]

You guys… please read this letter I found that I wrote back when I was twelve… I can’t stop laughing about the reason why I’d written it…

LMAOOO why I put bible shit in there is beyond me, but I think Adam and Eve was the extent of any biblical knowledge I had at that age and I wanted to flaunt it???? Questionable.

[weirdozjunkary]

Golden heart (SATBK au fic) chapter 4

This one I think is a little bit longer than the others. I actually had to cut it in half because I didn't realize how long I made this. Tension and a cliffhanger? Wonder what will come next?

Chapter1 Chapter3 Chapter5

Chapter 4- between a knight and a hedgehog

Sonic waved his hands in front of him, shaking his head dismissively as he wrapped his head around all of this. “No no no wait!” He put a hand to his hip and pointed a finger at the dark double, giving his famous grin. “You must be some guy that looks like Shadow, eh? Ha, well, you certainly still have his vibe, ill tell you that!”

The black hedgehog responded with a confused scowl. Who was this ‘Shadow’ this kid was talking about? What even WAS he talking about? And why did he look like the king back when he first met him? He wasn’t the king and the knight knew that. Though his manner of speech was odd, it was nowhere like the king's way of speaking. Admittedly he did think he was the king at first glance, but this was NOT him.

“Who are you?” The knight said in a harsh tone. “State your name and business at once!”

“Some things never change….” Sonic mumbled to himself as he shook his head. “Listen buddy, I can tell you my name if you tell me yours first, alright?”

“You wish to know MY name?” The hedgehog scoffed. “Very well. My name is Sir Lancelot! Knight of the Roundtable! My duty is to serve King Sonic and to protect this kingdom and all who are in it! Now tell me who you are or else I’ll smite thee down for trespassing on royal grounds!”

“Okay dude, chill!” Sonic raised his hands up in front of himself. “No need to spew out threats!”

“ ‘chill’? What is this idiocy? Tell me your name NOW!”

Sonic took a step back from the black hedgehog, giving a grin he usually gave when he was nervous. It was strange of him to be nervous, especially around Shadow. Normally any nervousness he had with him was because he was going to do something stupid. But something about this guy told Sonic that he could fold him like an armchair without breaking a sweat.

“A-Alright, listen buddy…” Sonic stuttered. “You might want to take a seat, cause you might not believe the words that come out of my mouth…”

“What words? What sort of nonsense are you spewing?” Lancelot responded even more hostile than before.

“Look! All I’m going to say is that…” Sonic inhaled. “I’m not from this place… or timeline… or universe… actually”

Lencelots eye twitched. “Are you making a fool out of me, young one?”

“Nope, no fools here. I am literally not associated with anything from this wo- URK!”

A hand lifted Sonic up by his throat. His feet dangled at most a foot off the carpeted floor. Lancelot’s scowl stared directly into his own face.

“O-okay! This is different…” Sonic strained.

“I don’t know what sort of game you are playing, hedgehog. But I will NOT fall to your childish attempts at fooling me.” Lancelot scoffed. “ ‘Another universe’. PAH! Do you take me for an idiot who will fall for talks of sorcery?”

“Don’t you use chaos energy?”

“BE QUIET! KNAVE!”

“Dude listen! I am not a threat! I literally met the king like this morning!” Sonic flailed his legs in a panic.

“Oh is that so?” Lancelot said with playful undertones.

“YES! YES IM TELLING YOU THE TRUTH!”

“Um, what is going on here?” A voice drifted in, turning their heads. It was a very tall silver coloured hedgehog, heck he was taller than Shadow- I mean, Lancelot. He didn’t have any armor on, so there was no telling if he was in the guard or not 

“Ah! Silver!” Sonic said with relief. “Im so-“

“Sir Galahad.” Lancelot interrupted. “I’m here interrogating this pest that thought he could walk into here!”

Galahad looked at sonic then back at Lancelot. “Lancelot, that's a child. I don't think poses a threat.”

Sonic furrowed his brow at the comment. He hated being called a kid, especially in that demeaning manner… even if he WAS a kid in a sense. Still, being talked down like that. He wasn’t gonna stand it.

“If so, then how did he get into the castle grounds?” Lancelot raised a brow.

Galahad paused in thought, then turned to the blue hedgehog. “How DID you get in here?”

“Uh… I ran?” Sonic strained out the last word.

“… You… ran…”

“I am REALLY fast! Practically known for my speed!” Sonic said with a cheeky grin.

Galahad gave Lancelot a look, who greatly returned one back to him. “ you are known for your speed? Something that the king was once known for in his adventure days? You do look like him to…”

“He says he’s from ‘another world’ to” Lancelot added.

“What do you mean?”

“He told me he’s from ‘another universe’. One where he babbles nonsense like he does.” 

“Really? That’s very… quaint.”

“Look, you guys can go on with your fancy talk or whatever…” Sonic said. “But uh- if you could just put me down, I’ll be out of your quills and-“

“Oh no! You aren’t leaving until we know what your business is!” Lancelot growled.

“Come on, Shadow! I told you about it already!”

“Enough with the nonsense, knave!” Lancelot shouted as he shook sonic like a ragdoll. “And who is this ‘Shadow’ you keep talking about?”

“Yes, you addressed me as ‘Silver’ when I entered the room.” Galahad said. “Are there others who are impersonating us?”

He leaned in next to Lancelot. Both knights looking very suspicious of the blue hedgehog that Lancelot had hoisted up by his throat. Though, Lancelot looked more annoyed or angered than anything, but that was just how Shadow usually was. Oh geez. There was no positive way around this encounter, was there? The king could always step in. But that guy seemed to be a shut in even to his own knights. 

“Haha okay, it seems that you guys aren’t believing me… surprisingly.” Sonic nervously chuckled. “Listen, if you let me go I PROMISE everything will be explained! Maybe we can call a meeting? Maybe around after dinner?” He shrugged with a big nervous grin on his face.

The knights grew more intense. Lancelot looked like he was about to toss him into the river if he kept on talking. 

“ I…..” sonic threw his hands down in defeat. “Ah, forget it.”

He kicked the dark knight across his face as swiftly as he could, releasing himself from his grasp. Using his momentum, Sonic spun and light speed dashed down the hall, creating a long trail of dust as he zoomed out of view at the speed of sound.

“What the hell?!” Lancelot cursed as he rubbed off the dirt from his cheek.

“He’s so fast!" Galahad said in amazement.

“AFTER HIM!” Lancelot ran past galahad who soon followed the pursuit. “We need to stop him before he tries anything!”

Sonic bounced, flipped, and unrolled himself. His sneakers squeaked as he retained his ballance. “Heheh, okay. That could have gone smoother…” 

“HEDGEHOG!!!” Lancelot screamed down the halls. He, along with Galahad, was fast. He was keeping pace with him.

“Huh, looks like ‘Tall dark and handsome’ and his friend are faster than I thought!” Sonic admitted. “But let’s see if they can catch up after THIS!” He gripped the ground and spun his legs around. Faster and faster they spun as he revved up his speed. “Sorry, I gotta split! But if you want to chat more, come on and talk to the king! If you can get to him before me!” 

And as soon as he let go he zoomed as fast as he could, faster than before. A ‘Super Peel Out’ as he called this move. He rarely used it, but boy was it fast! The move made his sneakers skidd and scream like a race cart on a race track. The blurry images that passed him flew by in slow motion to his eyes, each pillar or decoration were monochrome blobs to him. 

He zipped and zoomed. Turning on a dime around corners that seemed impossible. “Where’s that old guy!” He said to himself, trying to discern one monochrome blob from the other. The only thing he could see clearly was himself and what was right in front of him. A blue blur whizzed by from what Sonic could only guess was an open door. Was that the king? He was already too far to stop and turn himself around, he was going to have to take the long way back to him.

Three turns round and Sonic rushed down to the blue figure, who he now could see definitely was the king. He slowed down his pacing to prepare to skidd and stop before him.

“HEY! BLUE!” Sonic called out.

The king turned his attention to him, then squinted his old eyes at the blue speck that was approaching.

Sonic waved his arm out above his head. “BLUE! THERES SOMETHING THAT I MIGHT NEED HELP ON-“

The dark and silver knight appeared before him, it was chaos control! A move used mostly by Shadow the hedgehog, how fitting for this knight to be able to use it to. 

A green glow came from Lancelot as he drew out an electric blade made of chaos energy. Chaos spear. “YOU HAVE RAN FAR ENOUGH!” He lifted the chaos blade to strike.

“WOAH WOAH WOAH WAIT WAIT WAIT!” Sonic panicked and tried his hardest to stop moving forward. At the speed he was going, he was going to ram right into them.

[healingtheworldwithboburnham]

Ineffable Husbands x Taylor Swift (pt 5)

My favorite duo with my favorite sister albums, folklore and evermore. Pain.

exile - “And it took you five whole minutes, to pack us up and leave me with it, holding all this love out here in the hall [street]. I think I’ve seen this film before, and I didn’t like the ending. You’re not my homeland anymore, so what am I defending now? You were my town, now I’m in exile seeing you out.” [I CAN ALREADY SEE THE EDITS TO THIS ONE, SOMEONE GET TO WORK]

invisible string - [once they get their happy ending] “Hell was the journey, but it brought me heaven. Time, wondrous time, gave me the blues and then purple-pink skies. And it’s cool, baby, with me. And isn’t it just so pretty to think, all along there was some invisible string tying you to me?”

peace - “But I’m a fire, and I’ll keep your brittle heart warm if your cascade ocean wave blues come. All these people think love’s for show, but I would die for you in secret. The devil’s in the details, but you got a friend in me. Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?”

hoax - “My only one. My kingdom come undone. My broken drum. You have beaten my heart. Don’t want no other shade of blue but you. No other sadness in the world would do.” [you are the only one i would let hurt me vibes]

the lakes - “Take me to the lakes where all the poets went to die. I don’t belong, and my beloved, neither do you. [my beloved Angel, we don’t belong in Heaven or Hell. Let’s go to the lakes] Those Windermere peaks look like a perfect place to cry. I’m setting off, but not without my muse. No, not without you.” [does it ever hurt that so many times Crowley was going to set off to Alpha Centauri but he wouldn’t go without his angel, but his angel flitted off to heaven without him? AND IK Aziraphale would never soberly do this, but Crowley thinks he did.]

champagne problems - “You had a speech, you’re speechless. Love slipped beyond your reaches, and I couldn’t give a reason. Champagne [Almond Coffee?] problems.”

gold rush - cus they’re both so damn beautiful

no body, no crime - [joke because this is my headcanon abt what will happen when Crowley finds out what Metatron did (if he did do something) to Aziraphale]

coney island - “Were you waiting at our old spot [rendezvous point 3] in the tree line, by the gold clock? Did I leave you hanging every single day?

cowboy like me - “Now you hang from my lips like the Gardens of Babylon. With your boots beneath my bed, forever is the sweetest con. I’ve had some tricks up my sleeve. Takes one to know one, you’re a cowboy like me. And I’m never gonna love again.”

long story short - “Missing me at the golden gates they once held the keys to. When I dropped my sword, threw it in the bushes and knocked on your door. And we live in peace, but if someone comes at us, this time I’m ready. ‘Cause I fell from the pedestal, right down the rabbit hole. Long story short, it was a bad time.”

evermore - “I rewind the tape but all it does it pause, on the very moment all was lost [if gabriel and beelzebub can do it…] sending signals to be double-crossed… And I couldn’t be sure, I had a feeling so peculiar that this pain would be for evermore.”

right where you left me - “Did you hear about the girl who lives in delusion? Break ups happen every day you don’t have to lose it. She’s still 23, inside her fantasy, and you’re sitting in front of me. At the restaurant, when I was still the one you want, cross-legged in the dim light.” [A part of both of them will never leave that moment in the bookshop until they make up]

[jvstheworld]

The Buffy Re-watch: S1E8 (part 1)

I, Robot, You, Jane

Also known as the perils of online dating

The title itself is a play on 'Me, Tarzan, you, Jane'. The only version of Tarzan I've seen is the 1999 Disney one, Does anyone remember the TV show they did of it? And did anyone like it when it was a playable world in the first Kingdom Hearts game? For me it was kind of meh.

Straight away we know who our monster of the week is. Moloch. A demon that was around in 1400s Italy corrupting people to love him before he kills them. Sort of a Jim Jones vibe here.

Circle of Kayless. Huh, sounds kind of Klingon to me.

Evil demon is trapped in a book and kept in storage for 500 years until it happens to be in the possession of our favourite librarian. Question is: how did he get?

The first appearance of Jenny Calender. And is the complete opposite of Giles. Those tend to attract.

Giles in this season is hesitant to scan his books for easy access, but this is something he tries to do at the beginning of season 5 when he is making plans to leave for England. But the project was probably never finished as when he does leave in season 6 the gang still use the books.

Fritz's speech on the greatness of virtual vs paper is kind of true, but in a very annoying way. We currently have everything an our finger tips, news, books, TV, film, any info we want we can find by going online, and get it quicker than we can brew tea. it's convenient, anyone can access it as long as it's not behind paywall, and it is often cheaper than a physical copy. However, you don't own it. With what we are seeing with streaming services removing films and shows from their libraries is that nothing is permanent. Companies like HBO do it so they can save money. It's imperative, now more than ever, to own physic copies of the things you like because it may disappear virtually. Tech is great and using it can make lives easier, but in some cases just because you paid for it, doesn't mean you own it. Physical copies my cost more and take up space but it will still be there for later.

Giles is horrified that more interactions take place digitally that face to face. Yeah, it just gets worse over time. Giles would hate social media.

Jenny is flirting with Giles, so cute.

How is Willow scanning anything. She's holding the scanner so close to the book that she's missing both sides of the page and she did like 2 pages. What was the point of that?

Demon is a computer? Oh shit!

Chad Lindberg- also starred in Supernatural as Ash, the guy who lived at The Roadhouse with Joe and Ellen in season 2. There are a few Buffy actor who appeared in Supernatural, including Charisma Carpenter who was in season 7 episode 5 playing Maggie Stark, the wife of Don Stark who was played by James Marsters.

Did you notice that Willow has a photo of her and Giles in her locker door? When did they take that? Also gives more credence to her admission that she had a crush on him in season 4 episode 18.

Buffy has a good reason to be mistrustful about Malcolm. This was back when internet dating wasn't as prevalent as it is now. Nowadays it's more widely accepted, hell my dad met my step-mum through a dating site. The internet was still in its infancy here and Buffy just wants to make sure that Willow isn't getting catfished. I mean she is, but they don't know that yet.

An extra is talking about how his history report got messed up to say things that should not be said. We get a few details like this throughout the episode to show the scope of what Moloch is capable of.

Okay, okay, okay. I went on a couple of tangents and turned one point into a slight rant. Won't guarantee it won't happen again because it most definitely will. These posts I'm doing are in order of what happens in each episode and what I think of while watching them, so tangents happen and so long, drawn out thoughts.

Part 2 tomorrow.

[bapyswordsman]

Fanfiction request

Hello everyone. I want to read a fanfiction which gives fairytale + DnD vibes. This story may be inspired with Snow White (mostly characters) and I’m glad to see some relics easter egg from different fairy tales (like in Shrek). I want to see an adventurous saga with different locations (like in JRPG, inspired with old Final Fantasy games). I’m sorry, not so many details about the plot and characters motives… I want an epic story, but not a love story Some info about the characters: MC is a girl based on Snow White. All princess get along with animals (believe Disney), so I want to see her as a summoner of fantasy creatures or maybe a druid. But. She is not lightheaded and silly like a typical princess. I want to see her personality kinda like Rivet from Rift Apart. Hunter is a dragon born (DnD). He is a severe warrior who is doomed to serve the kingdom forever, because his dragon-people were sealed and tortured, soo, maybe he is the last one. He is a skilled warrior, who always can catch his prey. But he is actually a really kind-hearted dragon, who cares about people. His speech is really primitive, he often spells his name while talking. The Evil Queen as the antagonist/anti-hero. So, in this story she is the real mc mother, but she hates her, because the king (I want his personality elegant+insane like Phantom Thief) killed the person she sincerely loved and made her marry him instead and make 2 children in the past. The king had an abnormal blood, so the queen got some ugly scars on the half of her face. She tries to hide them, because she thinks people love her only for her beautiful appearance. She is kinda emotionless and really cold, but sometimes really hysterical and loud. She killed the king to rule the kingdom, because she hides her necromancy skill. She uses it to make people her puppets. (Also, in my imagination she wears something like gothic lolly dress lol)

Soo, there will be also the prince, but not the lovely man of the dream. Well, the prince is mc little brother, who always dreams to become the great knight, but he is a newbie who barely holds the sword. Always asks Dragon born to train him. His personality is based on funny rival characters kinda like Chazz from Yugioh GX. He is impudent and rough, but really innocent. The mirror is not the mirror, but the magical all-knowing crystal creature. It can be a sarcastic humorist with comic relief stuff.

[thehandwixard]

kh adventure liveblog adjcent but i think watching the bestie play it for the first time has really been the best experience i could have asked for. he is gasping in delight and shock at elements of the story and at captain hook's pirate ship coming up on screen and thats literally the energy i think you need to just like. foster in your heart. to get what kh is giving you.

that said, its important to note that with this level of "understanding the whimsy and earnestness of kh and letting it take you by the hand" hollow bastion was still like. insane. parts of hollow bastion are so dire and interesting and beautifully designed and other parts are a combination of "what someone who doesnt know anything about kingdom hearts thinks kingdom hearts is about (the disney princesses explaining the plot to you half of them you have not met)" and like. really saturday morning cartoon vibes. they give sora too many speeches. it doesnt work. but hollow bastion IS mostly good and cool its just like. th juxtaposition hurts it terribly. the culmination of the riku gets groomed storyline versus sora very clearly reading off a scripted speech about the light and hearts or whatever

[miyalove]

bnha boys + realistic confessions!

⤷ part two here! 

⤷ loosely inspired by @luvbub​‘s how haikyuu boys goofed up their confession!

💥 bakugou— accidentally scares the shit out of you. 

by the tiny, tiny chance that bakugou actually does develop a crush on you. you wouldn’t even know it. he’d be so passive aggressive and angry towards you that you’d prolly think you just piss him off just like everyone else in 1-A so when he tells you that he wants to talk to you alone, you’re terrified. he’s grumbling, face morphed into a monster-like expression. he’s practically scolding you. backhand compliments galore. calls you an excessive amount of names after almost every statement. when you try to talk, he tells you to shut up, cue his hands clawing up and those tiny explosions plus him threatening to blast you into kingdom come. at this point you're holding back your cries of fear.

🐰 midoriya— stutters and blushes too damn much. 

he’s beyond nervous to confess but after coaxing from friends, he figured it’s now or never. the move (curtesy of uraraka) was to plan a hang out one day and miraculously be busy. alone and in his dorm room of all places, midoriya is beyond embarrassed about all the All Might merch staring the two of you down as you guys talk. words just don’t seem to connect in his head anymore. his lips quiver whenever he speaks, voice cracks, he’s shaking in fear? joy? you don’t know. when he finally decides to just go for it, it comes out as a jumble of incoherent noises you can’t even consider words. you’re left sitting there like 🙂 he's trying his best, okay? give the guy a break, please

❄️ todoroki— so emotionally detached, it’s not even funny. 

another guy the fandom simps for but, let’s be real, he’d prolly not care. if there’s a slightest chance that he does like you, like bakugou, you won’t even know. literally you thought he was angry at you when he tells you he wants to talk to you alone, your heart fluttered but also a heavy weight come upon you. everything was just so monotone. there was no huge speech or grand gesture of love, it was just plain. doesn’t really knows what he’s saying. there’s a lot of “i THINK i like you?” you honestly didn't even know if he was messing around with you or not because... it just felt so suffocating. was he confessing his love to you or was he describe his daily workout routine? you didn't know but you imagine they hold the same amount of excitement for him.

💪🏽 kirishima— poor baby doubts himself. 

as unmanly as it is, kirishima can be very insecure. he’ll admit that his self esteem issues have gotten way better since middle school but every once in a while his demeanor cracks. he doesn’t ask you to talk alone, instead mina prolly forces you two into a closet until kirishima spits it out. he’s red in the face, stuttering, voice cracking, avoiding eye contact and it’s absolutely adorable. he’s stumbling over his words, and then he reminds himself how pathetic this probably looks to you (you think he’s adorable actually) so he just stops talking and just yells. screams at you about his feelings. it’s weird. it’s awkward but it definitely gets the point across. you confess back and he’s instantly a changed man. ya’ll walk out the cloest holding hands and talking like you’ve been a couple for years. he’s the only one that actually gets the girl. good job, kirishima; 10/10.

⚡️ kaminari— way too confident.

homeboy came in with his guns blazing. denki practiced his lines in the mirror the night before, got a whole new outfit ready, and made sure to buy extra mints so his breath don’t stank. he got all hyped up only for him to completely blank when it came to it. says a planned pick up line, ends up butchering it, and now he’s standing there like 😀 while you're like... wait did he just indirectly call you ugly? once he realizes that he’s fucking up the special moment, he completely short circuits. literally glitches out right in front of you and jirou has to pull you away from the awkward moment (as she leaves, of course she makes fun of the blonde).

🗣 shinso— he doesn’t even confess.

goes to you when he’s frustrated or needs someone to confide in. whenever he wakes up, you're the first thing he thinks about. so he assumed with how close the two of you are, that you two were dating already. this damn boy just figured you felt the same way and went with it. you’re in his dorm room, head resting on his lap as he flips through the latest addition of a manga he really likes. ya’ll are just vibing when you bring it up. “toshi, what are we?” doesn’t even bat an eye when he responds, “what do you mean?” "are we dating, is what i mean.” “we’ve been dating for 5 months already, (y/n).” um excuse me, WHAT? 😀

⤷ request for bnha are open! don’t see your faves? request a part two! 

edit: no longer accepting requests for realistic reactions.

[earlgreyinpajamas]

what if arthur bumps into merlin as dragoon doing magic and recognises him, but instead of having the whole magic reveal thing go down, our poor pining arthur instead thinks that merlin has been cursed by a sorcerer or something and the only way to break the curse is true love’s kiss (because we all know this soft bub secretly likes fairy tales and happy endings, the more tooth rottingly romantic the better). so obviously our bby arthur goes after merlin (who’s running away cause the magic ban is still in place and he likes his head on his shoulders thank you very much) in hopes that he’ll be the one to break the curse.

merlin manages to lose arthur in a crowd, so arthur just resorts to waiting for his manservant in his room, thinking that merlin would probably come to him eventually for help. but lo and behold, it’s a normal merlin that comes into his room instead of dragoon merlin he was expecting and arthur’s heart just breaks, thinking that merlin’s got a true love and it isn't him.

and then from here we go down the angsty path of arthur being a noble idiot and pushing merlin away and giving him days off to see his “beloved” and merlin just being very confused and hurt.

and then we fast forward to arthur’s life being in danger again and merlin having to transform back into dragoon to save him and when arthur sees him he thinks that merlin was transformed back into dragoon again because his true love’s love for him is too weak or something. arthur is absolutely furious at the audacity of this person to treat lightly something arthur would have treasured and then because arthur is so eaten up with grief and jealousy on the inside he shouts at merlin to give him a chance and love him more than whoever he loves now, because arthur would give his arm, his leg, his sword, his kingdom just for a single ounce of merlin’s affections. and also, he will clearly love merlin more than this jerk.

and also, you know that line that’s like ��if equal affection cannot be/let the more loving one be me” from that poem about the stars? that is basically the vibe of arthur’s speech. he is all like “and if you cannot love me, then i won’t make you, but please allow me to love you freely” and i am screaming thinking about it.

and merlin is just very confused and is all like “one, how did you know it was me and two, what true love”. and arthur is like “???? are you not cursed” and merlin is like “no???” and then transform back to normal. and arthur is simultaneously like “????” and also super embarrassed because he literally just went through the painful exercise of actually expressing his feelings instead of bottling everything up and it turns out that the situation was not dire enough to warrant that kind of pain. and he’s all like “all right, never mind” but merlin isn't gonna let this go and he’s just like “you love me???” and arthur is just telling him to drop it but merlin is like “that’s good cause ily too” and arthur’s brain just breaks and then maybe they smooch and we get a happy ending worthy of one of arthur’s favourite fairy tales.

(++ and obviously when arthur’s brain is no longer consumed with the whole transformation and true love’s kiss thing, he suddenly realises that he has just seen dragoon perform magic in front of him twice and if merlin and dragoon are the same person, then merlin has magic. and so he immediately rushes out onto the balcony in his sleepwear just to shout at camelot that the magic ban has hereby been rescinded and he’s about to go back in to cuddle with his boyfriend, before he realises that merlin is still kind of freaking out even though the magic ban has been lifted. 

arthur figures out that it takes a while to unlearn a lifetime of fear, so he goes back to the balcony to add that he has known and loved a certain man for a very long time, and has recently discovered that this man has magic, but it doesn't change a single thing about him at all because he is just as kind and good as anyone else in the kingdom or even better. the point of his speech is: magic doesn’t change anything about a person and it doesn't make them evil. cruelty exists in those with and without magic and people shouldn't be persecuted for having done no crime. and perhaps here arthur turns his head a little to look at merlin with the corner of his eye, who’s just straight up bawling in relief at this point, and he adds that he’s sorry to everyone who had to live in fear that it took so long for him to figure out.

and so our favourite pair live happily ever after, with merlin helping arthur to atone for the sins of his father and bring about albion’s golden age. the end!)

[retvenkos]

“i promise to hold you for the rest of my days.”

requested A HELNIK MARRIAGE? HELNIK BABIES??? THAT IS TOO MUCH POWER, BUT LET’S JUST THINK FOR A SECOND...

tw: pregnancy, babies, superstition, mentions of fetal and neonatal mortality/death (marked with *** ), light spoilers for crooked kingdom

— so, we all know matthias wanted to wait until marriage (so no kids until these two have tied the knot, lol), and nina respected that, but you know she constantly made jokes about marrying him right there.

every time she says she should just get down on one knee and marrying him right there, matthias has a little mini heart attack, because let’s be real, we all know nina would do it if she felt like it, and matthias has been working on his proposal for like.... months now.

— i have the feeling that the fjerdan’s have some kind of tradition where they have make something for the person they wish to marry - maybe whittle them something that represents the both of them and it ideally sits on the mantle of the fireplace of their home. sounds like fjerda, right?

anyway, matthias has agonized over the icon he’s going to whittle for nina, and then when he finally starts (it’s something that definitely involves a bird and a wolf) he’s so worried he’s going to get it wrong that it takes a really long time.

— inej has definitely found out at this point, and she thinks it’s sweet.

(inej gives nina vague hints that matthias is, indeed, planning to propose. nina rolls her eyes because she just knows he’s waiting because of some stupid fjerdan custom.)

— also, matthias had to enlist wylan and kuwei at one point to make sure it looked right. in fjerda, usually he would get help from elders in order to learn to expertly whittle, but matthias had to make do, and wylan and kuwei are both the most artistic, tbh. wylan and kuwei were both very touched, despite any residual tension they might still have. what a great bonding experience all around.

— when it actually does happen, you know nina is ecstatic, and she’s also very touched by his stupid fjerdan custom, even if it took him forever to do it.

— i don’t have many specific headcanons about the ceremony itself, but you know that zoya was invited, and so, by extension, the king of ravka was also invited, and it made for a really.... interesting wedding. 

imagine the nikolai lantsov at your wedding, asdfghjkjhgfghjj

— idk what role jesper has to have in order to give a toast, but you know he gives one and it’s one of the best speeches given in a long time. matthias is in awe of how jesper was able to plan such a speech, but little does he know, it was all ad libbed.

jesper just always has thoughts™ about his friends, okay? he’s a sap at heart.

— anyway, let’s get on to some baby headcanons because i have some thoughts™

— since it’s actually canon that matthias respects pregnant women, i feel like it’s not an understatement to say that he’s one of few men equipped to handle nina in such a state.

not to play into the “pregnant women are emotional messes” stereotype, but pregnancy is rough! nina handles it like a champ, but even the best of us cave under the pressure. 

— instead of getting weepy or sad though... nina would probably be the angry pregnant woman.

(you know that scene in never have i ever where devi says “who, me? i’m a goddamn delight. i should punch you in the adam’s apple for saying that.” those are the vibes.)

— also, matthias is very superstitious, so being a father only makes him 10 times worse.

it also proves to be a challenge, however, because his customs and nina’s customs differ.

it’s also enlightening for them both, because they start to notice different things they’ve seen their families do that are very anti-grisha or anti-fjerda.

— *** nina instinctively hides her belly for as long as possible, because it’s a fact for ravkans that fjerdan magic can curse a grisha baby in the womb, and matthias asks her what she’s doing and she’s like ............ well,,,

(he’s a good husband. he understands.)

— *** matthias starts one of his prayers that would protect his child from a myriad of dangers, among them heartrenders, who can kill babies in the womb. suddenly he stops and his eyes narrow like, ...........................wait a second,,,,,,,

(nina just raises her eyebrows. matthias stumbles over an apology. she understands.)

— i also have this personal headcanon that matthias is the absolute best oral storyteller you can find in fjerda (he takes after his father 🥲 ) and when nina is pregnant?? he is telling all the stories he can think of to her and his child.

he is soft, your honor,,,,,,,,,

— okay, okay, but the first baby is a girl, and she has eyes bluer than the clear, fjerdan skies, and the softest tufts of brown hair, and matthias is crying as he holds her.

i’m terrible at names, so you can imagine for yourself what they call her, but i imagine that nina chooses the name. it’s their first child, after all, and matthias firmly believes that nina knows their little girl best, so he waits for nina to tell him the name of his perfect daughter, and in the meantime, he calls her hajefetla - songbird.

( *** also, it’s my personal headcanon that ravkans wait a month to name their babies. so many little ones die, early on - especially if you’re near the fold - and waiting to name them was done to make the grieving less difficult.)

— matthias and nina both are worrier parents.

idk if they’re still living in ketterdam - if they are, their vigilance is highly understandable - but even if they aren’t, both of them know first hand how cruel and how dangerous this world can be to innocents.

— and there are many nights where matthias will sit up, watching nina sleep with their daughter, something like deep devotion carved into the tired lines of his face.

— and there were many days when nina would hold her daughter close to her chest, and wonder how she could make something so full of life, when all she was anymore was a corpsewitch - ruler of the dead.

(but every time, the other would find the one lost in thought, and hold them until things were okay, again.)

— nina waits everyday for her daughter to show grisha ability. she knows when her  powers first showed, but she’s heard about early and late bloomers. she waits every day with baited breath, wondering just what order her child will like... but the day never comes.

nina isn’t sure whether she’s relieved or disappointed. sometimes, she’s not quite sure if she’s ever accepted it; she waits, still.

— but in the meantime, she teaches her daughter everything she could ever need to know - how to speak every language she can think of, how to smile at some people and stick your tongue out at others, how to kiss someone’s injuries better and how to dislocate another’s jaw.

(matthias loves it, actually. he likes to sit back and hear nina’s voice - stern but warm, with all the care in the world.)

— but wait! i said their first baby is a girl. what about their second??? who are they????

— their second child is a boy, and he has his mother’s brown hair and his father’s strong jaw. and when he smiles, his eyes twinkle - a shade that’s neither blue nor green, but something in between, changing with his moods.

— he is 3 years younger than his older sister, and there isn’t a day that passes where she lets him forget it. for years, his usual retaliation involved telling uncle kaz, who would just give you one of those looks™, and you knew you were in the wrong.

the daughter got a lot of those, over the years, but she also learned to recreate it with stunning proficiency.

— when the boy is 5, however, the girl tries to pull the superiority card, and when the little boy gets mad, pimples shows up on the girls face.

and nina realizes her little boy is a tailor. she laughs out loud, and she and matthias plan a party for the little boy.

(as you can imagine, the 8 year old sister is not quite happy about this turn of events, but matthias pulls his little hajefetla aside, and he reminds her that she’s just as precious as her brother. when she looks at him unimpressed, he also reminds her that she’s still older than him. and for now, she’s taller.)

— okay, but now just little things that i think are important™

— the entire family clearly has a sweet tooth. 

waffles are a must in this house, and for a while, their daughter was going through a “i don’t like waffles” phase, and it was brought up at every. single. meal.

eventually, she grew out of it, but now it’s a family scandal. she’ll never live it down.

>> “remember when hajefetla hated waffles? i thought mama was going to disown her.” (the boy)

>> “shut up, beznako.” (the girl)

>> “language!” (nina)

>> “what does that one mean, again?” (matthias)

*everyone laughs*

— you know that both kids grew up on the stories of sankta alina, sankta zoya, genya safin, and nikolai lantsov - korol rezni. the two of them would reenact parts of the story for hours on end - the little boy got really good at tailoring their hair to be the right shade, and giving himself scars like genya.

and you know they both had posters of these iconic™ people in their room - who do you think had who?

— the boy is actually a really good singer. nina jokes that she has no idea how she created a singing voice like that, given her skill set. her daughter was not so lucky and inherited nina’s......... according to matthias, dulcet tones.

— you know both kids wanted a wolf at some point and nina is like ??? are you going to take care of it ??? because someone does all the work around here, and it certainly isn’t you two.

they know exactly what to do, though - they get aunt inej on board, and it’s kind of hard to argue with your best friend, y’know...

— and speaking of the crows.....

— kaz is the uncle who says he doesn’t want to be an uncle, and will frequently give really bad parenting advice so matthias doesn’t want his children around him... but also comes around every once in a while and gives the kids like,,, 50 kruge because they need to start learning about the power of greed now, nina. 

he also teaches the little boy to pickpocket and pick locks. the little girl is too impatient for all that, but he does give her good tips on where to hit someone so it really hurts.

— wylan is the uncle who like,,,, doesn’t know what to do with kids, and so naturally, the kids gravitate toward him. they love to hear his stories because at some point something blows up in the most epic way possible, and when hajefetla asks how he did it, he’ll just tell them. jesper is like,,,,,,,,,, do you want them to blow stuff up, wy? do you want nina to never let us baby sit again? wylans embarrassment intensifies.

— jesper also kinda doesn’t know what to do with kids, but hey, he’s actually pretty good at it, and if he ever puts a bad idea into one of the kid’s heads, at least he covers by saying “but we won’t do that, right?” and the kids are like,,, “ *sly smile*.......sure.” and jesper is like, “right???” 

— it’s alright in the end. they like him too much, and if they were to do anything bad, nina wouldn’t let him near her children again. so they behave, just so jesper can keep coming around.

he definitely teaches the little girl to shoot. i feel like she’d have some good aim.

— lesser folk might forget about him (shame on them) but kuwei is a part of this dysfunctional family, too, and he’s actually really good with kids. he might be a pyro (and the little boy’s role model, tbh) but he knows how to handle kids. the fun uncle has arrived, and jesper is not happy about it. there might be a bit of a rivalry between the two of them, over which one is cooler, but c’mon - kuwei can make fire in his hands. he’s clearly the more popular one, at least while the kids are little.

i also think we seriously need to talk about kuwei and nina’s friendship - now that kuwei has lived in ravka and has trained at the little palace, this man knows all the drama that’s happening. he and nina can talk for hours, my friends. he can bring her recipe’s from home <3. she can give him bad advice for social climbing <3. they can gossip about the others in shu (or just talk but pretend to be gossipping to make everyone uncomfortable). give them the friendship they deserve.

— and last but not least is my girl inej who everyone loves. 👏👏 they want to know how to defy gravity like the wraith 👏👏 they want to know how to swordfight like the wraith 👏👏 they want to know how to throw knives like the wraith 👏👏 the stories these kids grew up with about inej!!! they want to be just like her and honestly? same.

inej is at least a good sport about it and tells them they have to do their chores, first, and be nice to their parents all week if they want a demo on tightrope walking.

— and after long days of family antics, whatever business you’d like to call what kaz brekker ropes them into, and long talks about moral obligation from their father, nina and matthias’ children - babies still, in their minds, but steadily growing out of that label with each passing day - lay down in their beds.

— nina tucks them in with thick blankets that cover all the way up to their chin, and she leans into her husband’s embrace and he tells the family a midnight story - his voice rumbling deep in his chest, his arms wrapped around her, tight.

— and at this point, he’s learned ravkan and kerch stories, too, and he’s gotten rather good at building suspense slowly, choosing his words with the utmost care and attention, letting them unspool in a familiar, but exciting way. his little girl interrupts him when he first begins, and his little boy tells her off in a sleepy voice, but nina tells them to listen, and they’re always fast asleep by the soft (occasionally chilling) end.

AND FLUFF ENSUES.

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[o-wyrmlight]

INDULGE AWAY MY FRIEND

Affogato gets recommended as an advisor because he found himself awoken in a random coffee tribe and they liked him so much over the month he spent with them that when Dark Cacao sent out the call for his kingdom's townships and tribes to send a representative to be a potential new advisor for him they recommended Affogato.

It's not how Affogato became advisor last time, but you know what? He can roll with it.

Affogato was late. He figured it'd be fine because Dark Cacao is often late (struggles to get out of bed and whatnot) but is legitimately SURPRISED when everyone else was already there except him. INCLUDING Dark Cacao.

Apologies are made. Dark Cacao essentially tells him that he's got little tolerance for a cookie who cannot even bother to be ON TIME. Affogato tries to suck up to Dark Cacao's pride only to be very firmly told that 'Flattery has no place in my court.' Affogato is quietly upset and thrown off, a la emotional dysregulation style, because he just gives me the vibes of a cookie who feels a lot of shit when he doesn't want to and has difficulty with that.

Hey guess what? You all get equal chances. Here's how it'll go: I ask you a series of hypothetical questions and you answer them to the best of your ability. Food and board is provided. Over the days I will ruminate on your answers before chosing a few of you to continue with the selection process.

Weirdly it makes sense. Weirdly still it's so fucking organized and Affogato is Squinting because there's something weird about this and it's not JUST that Dark Cacao was here on time or that he's actually letting cookies into the castle--and very willingly, at that. So that's kind of weird, but maybe he mistook the timeframe and this is shortly before his self-made isolation?

Yadda yadda, introductory speeches, then Affogato vaguely notices something up with his eyes. They got slits. Like coffee cookies do. Like he does.

Oh SHIT that is ALARMING. Either Dark Cacao is REALLY fucking pissed right now or he is NOT the Dark Cacao that Affogato is acquainted with.

So yeah. Affogato doesn't get his turn for a few days. Food is provided but it's markedly bitter, and it's not to Affogato's sensitive tastes. A shame, but he's already contemplating his future coup--so since the food here is just as bitter, that must mean that Dark Cacao himself is just as helpless to the sweetness of his medicine, yes?

He explores the place as best he can, tries to do some research, doesn't find much--there never was a particularly large library in the citadel.

Eventually his turn comes and he's as polite as can be, complimentary and whatnot. All he gets in return for those comments is an icy stare. And then the questions!

And wow. It's no wonder it took so long with each potential advisor. Whoever this Dark Cacao is, he's actually ENGAGING with the conversation. Asking the 'why', the 'how', the 'why do you believe that this would be ideal?' And Affogato is sort of stunned at that--not really used to Dark Cacao doing much more than saying 'yes' or 'no', and if he needed to be encouraged to only need a gentle push or two. It's almost admirable, how seriously and contemplatively he takes these issues, hypothetical though they may be.

And then he mentions the wall, and Affogato's heart sinks with disbelief. The hypothetical question is about the wall, because of COURSE it is. When will this king realize that there is nothing behind that stupid wall? That it's a waste of resources and time? The sheer stupidity of the question makes him lose his composure for a moment and ask if he's JOKING. And Dark Cacao's face creases with annoyance. No, he states, he is not. Answer the question.

Baffled, Affogato does so, knowing that he needs to keep himself in Dark Cacao's good graces if he wants to proceed as he has before. Even though it's STUPID, really. How long had Dark Cacao been building up that wall only for nothing to come through? How many years? It's ridiculous! He cannot take this question seriously!

And then he hears a bell ring from somewhere outside. It's an eerie sound, and it's loud enough that he can feel it in his stomach. Dark Cacao immediately jumps to his feet, grabbing his Grapejam Chocoblade, and declares the meeting cut short. 'Follow evacuation proceedures' and whatnot.

And maybe he does, baffled though he is by the suddeness of it all. Maybe he does follow the cookies downstairs--fellow advisor candidates, older cookies, children and mothers with half-baked cookies and cookies who cannot fight. Maybe he does, and maybe he sees the security of the doors close behind him, leaving him in the familiarity of a room filled with strangers. And maybe he only really sees the reason why the bell rang, the reason the earth shook above and under and around them, when the doors finally open hours later, and everybody is set free.

Maybe he sees it in the courtyard, intertwined and draping around the buildings that scatter throughout the inner citadel, broken buildings and shingles and the smell of jamshed scattered about.

Or maybe he doesn't evacuate. Maybe he thinks he is to clever for that. Maybe he pretends like he does, because the bells are alarming and he would rather be aware of what this alleged 'danger' really is.

And maybe when he looks out the window, he sees a massive serpent breaking down the citadel wall, towering high and mighty, larger than life. Maybe he sees its mouth open and feels the earth shake beneath his feet and all around him and in him as it strikes down buildings and cookies with swords and arrows and spears, all ants in comparison to this impossibly massive creature. Maybe his knees go weak, and panic paralyzes his core, and all he can think is:

'Oh. He wasn't joking.'

There are serpents in the sea, and they are truly dangerous.

[pedanticat]

This scene from the finale was giving off so many Kingdom Hearts vibes that I just had to insert a piece of KH music into the scene. It gave me major flashbacks to Sora's speech about hearts he gave to Xigbar and Xemnas in Dream Drop Distance (hence why I choose Link to All).

[booklindworm]

A rant against Karen Traviss' understanding of history and her FAQ answers

Did you base the Mandalorians on the Spartans?

<cite> No. I didn't. </cite> Fair enough.

<cite> I really wish history was taught properly - okay, taught at all - in schools these days, because history is the big storehouse that I plunder for fiction. It breaks my heart to hear from young readers who have no concept even of recent history - the last fifty years - and so can't see the parallels in my books. You don't have to be a historian to read my novels, but you'll get a lot more out of them if you explore history just a little more. Watch a history channel. Read a few books. Visit some museums. Because history is not "then" - it's "now." Everything we experience today is the product of what's happened before. </cite> Yeah, I do to. Please, Ms Traviss, go on, read some books. Might do you some good. And don't just trust the history channels. Their ideas about fact-checking differ wildly.

<cite> But back to Mandos. Not every military society is based on Sparta, strange as that may seem. In fact, the Mandos don't have much in common with the real Spartans at all. </cite> You mean apart from the absolute obsession with the military ["Agoge" by Stephen Hodkinson], fearsome reputation ["A Historical Commentary on Thucydides" by David Cartwright], their general-king ["Sparta" by Marcus Niebuhr Tod], the fact that they practically acted as mercenaries (like Clearch/Κλέαρχος), or the hyper-confidence ("the city is well-fortified that has a wall of men instead of brick" [Plutarch, Life of Lycurgus])...

<cite> A slightly anarchic, non-centralized, fightin' people? Sounded pretty Celtic to me. Since I went down that path, I've learned more about the Celts (especially the Picts), and the more I learn, the more I realise what a dead ringer for Mandos they are. But more of how that happened later... </cite>

The Celtic people are more than one people, more than one culture. Celtic is a language-family! In the last millennium BC nearly every European ethnic group was in some ways Celtic, and they were not one. Later, after the Germanic tribes (also not one people, or a singular group) moved westwards, the Celtic cultures were still counted in the hundreds. Not only Scotland was Celtic! Nearly all of Western Europe was (apart from the Greek and Phoenician settlers on the Mediterranean coasts). The word “Celts” was written down for the first time by Greek authors who later also used the word “Galatians”. The Romans called these people “Gauls”, and this word was used to describe a specific area, bordered by the Atlantic Ocean, the Cévennes and the Rhine: “Gaul”. So the Celts, the Galatians and the Gauls were all part of the same Celtic civilisation. "Celts, a name applied by ancient writers to a population group occupying lands mainly north of the Mediterranean region from Galicia in the west to Galatia in the east [] Their unity is recognizable by common speech and common artistic traditions" [Waldman & Mason 2006] Mirobrigenses qui Celtici cognominantur. Pliny the Elder, The Natural History; example: C(AIUS) PORCIUS SEVERUS MIROBRIGEN(SIS) CELT(ICUS) -> not just one culture "Their tribes and groups eventually ranged from the British Isles and northern Spain to as far east as Transylvania, the Black Sea coasts, and Galatia in Anatolia and were in part absorbed into the Roman Empire as Britons, Gauls, Boii, Galatians, and Celtiberians. Linguistically they survive in the modern Celtic speakers of Ireland, Highland Scotland, the Isle of Man, Wales, and Brittany." [Celtic Culture: a historical encyclopedia. by John Koch] "[] the individual CELTIC COUNTRIES and their languages, []" James, Simon (1999). The Atlantic Celts – Ancient People Or Modern Invention. University of Wisconsin Press. "All Gaul is divided into three parts, one of which the Belgae live, another in which the Aquitani live, and the third are those who in their own tongue are called Celtae, in our language Galli." [Julius Caesar, De Bello Gallico] <= I had to translate that in school. It's tedious political propaganda. Read also the Comentarii and maybe the paper "Caesar's perception of Gallic social structures" that can be found in "Celtic Chiefdom, Celtic State," Cambridge University Press. The Celtic tribes and nations were diverse. They were pretty organized, with an academic system, roads, trade, and laws. They were not anarchic in any way. They were not warriors - they were mostly farmers. The Celts were first and foremost farmers and livestock breeders

The basic economy of the Celts was mixed farming, and, except in times of unrest, single farmsteads were usual. Owing to the wide variations in terrain and climate, cattle raising was more important than cereal cultivation in some regions.

Suetonius addressing his legionaries said "They are not soldiers—they're not even properly equipped. We've beaten them before." [not entirely sure, but I think that was in Tacitus' Annals]

Regarding the Picts, in particular, which part of their history is "anarchic"? Dál Riata? the Kingdom of Alba? Or are you referring to the warriors that inspired the Hadrian's Wall? Because no one really knows in our days who the fuck they were. The Picts’ name first appears in 297 AD. That is later. <cite> Celts are a good fit with the kind of indomitable, you-can't-kill-'em-off vibe of the Mandos. Reviled by Rome as ignorant savages with no culture or science, and only fit for slaughter or conquest, the Celts were in fact much more civilized than Rome even by modern standards. </cite> That's how the Romans looked at pretty much every culture that wasn't Greek, Roman, Phoenician, Egyptian, or from Mesopotamia (read, if you want, anything Roman or Greek about the Skyths, the Huns, Vandals, Garamantes...).

<cite> They also kicked Roman arse on the battlefield, and were very hard to keep in line, so Rome did what all lying, greedy superpowers do when challenged: they demonized and dehumanized the enemy. (They still used them in their army, of course, but that's only to be expected.) </cite> They were hard to keep in line, but they most definitely did not kick Roman arse on the battlefield. Roman arse was kicked along the borders of the Roman Empire, such as the Rhine, the Danube, the Atlas mountains, etc. And mostly by actually badly organized, slightly anarchic groups, such as the Goths or the Huns (BTW the Huns were not a Germanic people, even though early 20th century British propaganda likes to say so). Though they were also decisively stopped by the Parthians. Who were very organized. Ah well. <cite> While Rome was still leaving its unwanted babies to die on rubbish dumps - a perfectly acceptable form of family planning to this "civilisation" - and keeping women as chattels devoid of rights, the barbarian Celts had a long-standing legal system that not only gave women what we would think of as equal rights, but also protected the rights of the elderly, children, and the disabled. They had a road network across Europe and worldwide trade long before the Romans ever got their act together. And their science - well, their astronomical calculations were so sophisticated that it takes computers to do the same stuff today. </cite> See? You even say yourself that they weren't actually anarchic. Also you're not completely right: 1. women (of most Celtic cultures, with one notable exception being the Irish) were not allowed to become druids, e.g. scientists, physicians, priests, or any other kind of academics, so they did not have equal rights. Also, as in other Indo-European systems, the family was patriarchal. 2. the roads they had were more like paths, and did not span the entirety of Europe; the old roads that are still in use are nearly all of them Roman. Had the Celtic inhabitants of Gallia or Britannia built comparable roads, why would the Romans have invested in building a new system on top? 3. world-wide? Yeah, right. They traded with those who traded with others and so were able to trade with most of southern Eurasia and northern Africa, as well as few northern parts (Balticum, Rus), but that's (surprise) not the whole world. 4. most people use computers for those calculations you mention because its easier. It's not necessary. I can do those calculations - give me some time to study astronomy (I'm a math major, not physics) and some pencils and paper. 5. and - I nearly forgot - the kids didn't die. That was a polite fiction. The harsh truth is that most Roman slaves were Romans... <cite> So - not barbarians. Just a threat to the empire, a culture that wouldn't let the Pax Romana roll over it without a fight. (Except the French tribes, who did roll over, and were regarded by the Germanic Celts [...]) </cite> WTF Germanic Celts? What are you smoking, woman? Isn't it enough that you put every culture speaking a language from the Celtic family in one pot and act as if they were one people, now you have to mix in a different language-family as well? Shall we continue that trend? What about the Mongolian Celts, are they, too, proof that the Celts were badass warriors? I think at this point I just lost all leftover trust in your so-called knowledge. <cite> [...] as being as bad as the Romans. Suck on that, Asterix... </cite> Asterix was definitely a Celt, and unlike the British Celts, he was not a citizen of the Roman Empire.

<cite> Broad brush-stroke time; Celts were not a centralized society but more a network of townships and tribes, a loose alliance of clans who had their own internal spats, but when faced with some uppity outsider would come together to drive off the common threat. </cite> They might have tried, but they didn't. The first and only time a Celtic people really managed to drive off some uppity outsider would be 1922 following the Anglo-Irish Treaty of 1921*. The fact that France, Spain, Portugal speak Romance languages and the British (or Irish) Isles nearly uniformly speak English should be proof enough.

*Unless you count Asterix. <cite> You couldn't defeat them by cutting off the head. There was no head to cut off. </cite> You mean unlike Boudica and Vercingetorix. Oh wait. Tacitus, in his Annals, said that Boudica's last fight cost 80,000 Britons and 400 Romans their lives. He was probably exaggerating. But it definitely stopped much of the British resistance in its tracks. <cite> To the centralized, formal, rather bureaucratic Romans, for whom the city of Rome was the focus of the whole empire, this was a big does-not-compute. The Celts were everything they didn't understand. And we fear what we don't understand, and we kill what we fear. </cite> While that is totally true, it's also completely off the mark. The Romans demonized the druids, not every Celt, and they were afraid of what was basically an academic network. That had nothing to do with war. <cite> Anyway, Mandos....once I took a single concept - in this case, the idea of clans that operated on a loose alliance system, like the Celts - the rest grew organically. I didn't plan it out in detail from the start. </cite> That's really obvious. Maybe looking at some numbers and remembering that you weren't planning a small, local, rural, medieval community would have helped, too. I mean lets have a look at, say, Scotland (since you specifically mentioned the Picts): they still have less than 6 mio. people all together, and that's today. Mandalore is a sector. A sector of Outer Space with at least 2000 inhabited planets. How do you think that translates? It doesn't. <cite> I just asked myself what a culture of nomadic warriors would value, how they would need to operate to survive, and it all grew inexorably by logical steps. The fact that Mandos ended up as very much like the Celts is proof that the technique of evolving a character or species - find the niche, then work out what fits it - works every time. It creates something very realistic, because that's how real people and real societies develop. </cite> Celtic people were usually not nomadic! And, once again, non of them were predominantly warriors! It's really hard to be a nomadic farmer. I believe the biggest mistake you made, Ms Traviss, is mixing up the Iron Age (and earlier) tribes that did indeed sack Rome and parts of Greece, and that one day would become the people the Romans conquered. And apart from the Picts they really were conquered. <cite> So all I can say about Mandos and Spartans is that the average Mando would probably tell a Spartan to go and put some clothes on, and stop looking like such a big jessie. </cite>

I'd really like to see a Mando – or anyone – wearing full plate without modern or Star Wars technology in Greece. Happy heatstroke. There is a reason they didn't wear a lot (look up the Battle of Hattîn, where crusaders who didn't wear full helmets and wore chainmail* still suffered badly from heat exhaustion). [Nicolle, David (1993), Hattin 1187: Saladin's Greatest Victory] *chainmail apparently can work like a heatsink CONCLUSION You're wrong. And I felt offended by your FAQ answers. QUESTION You're English. You're from England. A group - a nation - that was historically so warlike and so successful that by now we all speak English. A nation that definitely kicked arse against any Celtic nation trying to go against them (until 1921, and they really tried anyway). A nation that had arguably the largest Empire in history. A nation that still is barbaric and warlike enough that a lost football game has people honestly fearing for their lives.

Also, a Germanic group, since you seem to have trouble keeping language-families and cultures apart. If we were to talk about the family, we could add on the current most aggressively attacking nation (USA) plus the former most aggressively attacking nations (the second and third German Reich), also the people who killed off the Roman Empire for good (the Goths and Visigoth), the original berserkers (the Vikings) and claim at the very least the start of BOTH WORLD WARS. Why did you look further?

Some other sources:

Histoire de la vie privée by Georges Duby and Philippe Ariès, the first book  (about the antiquity) I read it translated, my French is ... bad to non-existent

The Day of the Barbarians: The Battle That Led to the Fall of the Roman Empire  (about the Huns) by Alessandro Barbero

If you speak Dutch or German, you might try

Helmut Birkhan: Kelten. Versuch einer Gesamtdarstellung ihrer Kultur, Verlag der Österreichischen Akademie der Wissenschaften, Wien

Janssens, Ugo, De Oude Belgen. Geschiedenis, leefgewoontes, mythe en werkelijkheid van de Keltische stammen. Uitgeverij The House of Books

DISCLAIMER

I’m angry and I wrote this down in one session and thus probably made some mistakes. I’m sorry. Or maybe I’m not sorry. I’m still angry. She can’t know who reads her FAQ and at least two of her answers (on her professional website) were offensive to the reader.

[silvermuffins]

Pokemon Legends Arceus: because i sold my soul to nintendo long ago

Truth be told I preordered this game the moment it was available and downloaded it ASAP. And then proceeded to not touch it. ADHD brain. Lack of time in between other things. Part of me screaming that I should finish a game before starting another. The stars weren't right. Couldn't do it. Stars, man. Stars.

But today my lifelong love has returned to me, and today we fight to the death!

i haven't even opened the game yet ftr. but i HAVE closed the one i'd been playing, so i'm ready to go.

leeeet's do this

shiny light and i expect to hear "open your eyes...wake up, Link!"

oh shit, beyond both time and space, gold, is this the collective unconscious

hello god its me margaret

i do not know how much of my appearance i'll be able to change later....as for name. hm. i picked a very unjapanese look, but i do want a japanese name... [much working ont hat later] Eiko

wait this is a fucking isekai?

like god is telling me a world in which pokemon is gonna be strange to me

yooooo EIKO ISN'T FROM POKEMON WORLD

maybe i shouldn't have gone with a japanese name lol too late now

yo it's straight up GOD telling me to catch 'em all this time

YEET

oh fuck there goes my phone

this is now a kingdom hearts opening sequence

awww god took my-- okay dude PLEASE tell me you didn't download any sketchy apps i JUST got this phone

rude

what is that thumping

i FELL OUT OF THE SKY

strange hat man thinks I'M the weird one for falling out of the sky

which tbf i probably am

also tf is that thundery swirly thing in the sky over there are we just gonna fucking ignore that?!

if im not from the pokemon world why does my teeshirt have a luxury ball on it

"a bit of a pickle"

"a bit"

NO SHIT DUDE

i just told you i don't have an acquaintance around here why would you think i have somewhere to stay

NO I AM NOT SURE I WILL SURVIVE

holy shit my guy my dude

expressive protag tho, very nice, that was a very clear look of oh fuck im screwed

the starters just patiently waiting to be acknowledged

"almost as if they knew" yup okay then they knew and there's some destiny bullshit going on

i mean i guess i WAS literally sent by god

siiiigh I know what a pokemon is but Eiko has to get the tutorial

im amazed strange hat man even considered i might not know

currently stalling while i try to pick a starter

Laventon.....okay so the locals don't necessarily have Japanese names we all good

off the starters go again which tbh im surprised they didn't sooner

cant jump cant swim

oh arceus marks my targets ig?

no it's just GIVING MY GODDAMN PHONE BACK

oh sick custom case

god is texting me

this is gonna be the coolest catching tutorial ever

also we're not gonna do a nickname theme it's gonna just be whatever

also thank you game freak for giving cyndaquil its fire back

.....sooooo so far im getting professor useless vibes from laventon, can't wait to ditch him. i got my mission from god, don't need you.

whoa holy shit fifty?

laventon's design is SO weird like what is he even doing

so pokemon can shrink themselves???? ALL of them can? so why can't everything use minimize

....is laventon british? or galarian????? because his speech patterns....

booped oshawott riiight in the snoot

excuse you sir who are you calling old girl

acting awfully avuncular for a dude i met two seconds ago

bla bla pokedex sir i have my mission

BUT THOU MUST rowan's way of but thou musting was vastly superior

he's finally doing something helpful to the kid who just got isekai'd

oh we are FINALLY acknowledging the ominous cloud over the mountain

them's some sideburns

the villagers are, appropriately, confused and curious and gossipy

god has bequeathed me a gps

prelude beach, that's kinda on the nose

as a true jrpg player i am running around talking to everyone before i get on with shit

oh jesus nearly every building seems to be able to be go-inside-able

village guardian shrine has an arceus ring in it....

okay can't enter any buildings yet

my guy's mustache is green but his beard is grey

holy fuck hi lucas

laventon is a foreigner confirmed!

"yeah he's professor useless hang with the cool kids instead"

ooook lucas's name is Rei

somehow laaventon snuck up on him though...

Cyllene. who gave her the right to be so this,

holy shit i have an age

EVERYONE here is sus of me wow

THIS is how we're explining the [POINTS AT OMINOUSLY THUNDERING SWIRLY THING]

just casually discussing space-time rifts over dinner like it's nbd?!

also is it me or are lots of people kinda looking down on the Survey Corps

awww cyllene is a stress eater

we got new villagers out and some relocated bc it's later! and whoa shit nice room

why are there jars of rocks in my room

get this show on the road

thats probably fine

there's so many foreigners here??? so why am i an issue

"almighty Sinnoh" what the fuck

there's actually a shitton of people here

okay i'm ready to Continue

holy shit cyllene your desk

what guidance did i just activate???

also she really is just gonna yeet me out in the wild huh

thankfully laventon is PROBABLY going to "it's dangerous to go alone! take this"

we goin' Cyndaquil!

hang on time for more exploring

who dat

oh shit dude YOU should be the professor

you could call the pokedex....volo's guide to monsters

oh snap we gonna fight

unsure if stranger danger?

eh it's probably okay he seems sparkly

holy shit that battle music is so hype

whoa potions do a LOT

awww this trial is cute

all done. can't wait to be out of the tutorial zone and just be free

explorin'. when can i trust npcs won't say new things?

i sorta like how people are a little meaner than most pokemon games

finally, clean clothes! and, hat get! am now true protag

i completely missed the second floor when i was exploring here earlier...didn't even occur i might be able to go up the other staircase

hello rowan senior,oh fuck dude wants to fight

oh my fuckign god

etjkrtyfnretr

i love this man

let's just get on with things instead of hunting down every scrp of unique diaalogue

this research system already looks SO cool

im gona dress up CUTE

wastes money to change hair just to preview hats then change back bc i didn't like any of 'em

the photo place is interesting

okay! field time!

i don't have a shitton to say right now im just kicking around having fun

rei can you pls just leave me to do my thing, my exploring is very quickly proving to be more efficient than your handholding

i keep trying to use botw controls

he checks on me, has me check if i have tasks to report. there are 41. got a shitton of points for that. caan i cross the bridge yet?

time to go get a star

Diamond Clan.....hmmm

awww him have pika

oh sweetheart you are NOT gonna win

i want this lady to carry me

and then we took a break for food!

[several hours later]

ooh i get mystery gifts now!

volo still Being

i must go my people need me we are leaving it here for now

[twstarchives]

I’m Really Tired of Watching It

Card: Ceremony Robes - SR Characters: Ace, Riddle, Epel, Mirror of Darkness, Vil (mentioned)

Chapter 1

—MIRROR CHAMBER—

Mirror of Darkness: Reveal thy name.

Ace: Ace! Ace Trappola.

Mirror of Darkness: The shape of thy soul is...

Heartslabyul!

Ace: I knew it’d be Heartslabyul. It’s the same dorm my alumni brother was in.

Riddle: Hey! When your sorting is finished, you are to promptly return to your seat.

It’s completely unacceptable for anyone who calls himself a Heartslabyul student to ever be disruptive.

Ace: Roger that, Dorm Leader! I’m taking my seat now!

What’s with him? He’s so short but real scary.

Anyway, I finished my dorm sorting without any issues...

Next we just wait for everyone else to get sorted, and then the entrance ceremony will be done. I can take it easy ♪

        (Deuce goes up)

Mirror of Darkness: Heartslabyul!

Ace: Whoa, that serious-looking guy is in the same dorm as me? He looks like the kinda guy I’d never be friends with.

Mirror of Darkness: Scarabia!

Ace: Oh~? Seems about right.

Mirror of Darkness: Savanaclaw!

Ace: ......

Mirror of Darkness: Octavinelle!

Ace: How many more people do we have to watch...?

Mirror of Darkness: Pomefiore!

Riddle: ......

Ace: I’m so bored.

The teachers and dorm leaders have been watching the sorting with the most serious looks on.

I know!

This looks like it’ll be a while, and no one would notice if one or two people slipped out till the sorting finished, right?

I should bring someone that looks kinda weak with me just in case.

That way, if a teacher happens to catch us leaving, we could just say we were looking for the infirmary.

Let’s see who’s close to my spot... Oh! The guy in front of me looks super dainty from behind. He’d be perfect to bring!

Hey, you, other freshman. There’s something I wanna ask you...

Epel: What is it...?

Ace: Whoa?!

Epel: You’re... really loud. We’re in the middle of a ceremony.

Ace: M-My bad, sorry.

That surprised me... I thought he was a girl when he turned around...

Epel: ...Did you say something?

Ace: No, no, nothing! What I wanted to ask you about was... Isn’t it boring how long we have to sit through this sorting?

Epel: Well... Yes.

Ace: So let’s go out for a while till everyone’s done getting sorted.

Epel: Huh? But...

Ace: No one’ll know if we quietly sneak out together.

Hey, please? This boredom is driving me crazy!

Epel: H-Hold on a sec! Don’t just forcibly pull my sleeve...!

Ace: Come on, hurry so they don’t see us!

—OUTSIDE NIGHT RAVEN COLLEGE—

Ace: Alright. We should be good here.

Epel: ...Let go of my hand.

Ace: Hm? ...Oh, sorry, sorry. Uhh...

Epel: My name’s Epel.

Ace: Epel! I’m Ace.

Epel: Ace...-kun.

Ace: Yep. So, what dorm did you get into?

Epel: ...Pomefiore.

Ace: Ahh... The dorm leader there sounds like a lot to handle...

I think I remember him giving a passionate speech about how “beauty is everything” and how important it is to “push yourself hard.”

Epel: Yeah, he seems strict... and really difficult... What about you?

Ace: I got into Heartslabyul! Our dorm leader seems pretty strict too...

Well, my older brother was in Heartslabyul too, so maybe he’ll tell me all the best spots inside the dorm for skipping class?

Epel: ...That’d be nice. Plus, you seem like you fit Heartslabyul.

Ace: Hehe, do I? You give off Pomefiore vibes too. I feel like you’d look great in their dorm uniform.

Epel: ......

Ace: What is it? The dorm leader might be scary, but you never know, it might turn out to actually be pretty nice once you get in.

Hey, since we have the time, why don’t we go to Pomefiore?

Epel: No... It’s okay.

Ace: You sure?

Then how about we walk around here? Let’s explore Night Raven College together!

Chapter 2

—COURTYARD—

Ace: Here’s the courtyard~ This must be the best spot to skip, ‘cause my brother was always recommending it.

Epel: Yeah...

Ace: Oh, there’s a bench under the apple tree! Looks perfect for napping on, huh?

If a teacher came over, you could just pass it off by saying “I have a stomachache and needed to rest a little~”

Epel: ...You could.

Ace: ...I kinda feel like I’ve been the only one really talking so far. Are you bored or something?

Epel: No...

Ace: Are you starting to regret sneaking out of the ceremony?

Epel: No, it’s not that...

Ace: Hey, Epel. These responses aren’t really telling me anything.

Are you always like this? If you wanna say something, just say it.

Epel: ...N-No. It’s nothing.

Ace: Hmm... Oh yeah, Epel, are you sure you’re not actually a girl? To be honest, I was really shocked when I first called out to you.

Epel: Wha...! I-I’m not!

Ace: Oh, that was good right there.

Feels like you finally spoke from your heart.

Epel: ...!

Ace: Although, you really hesitate a lot before you speak. We’re both freshmen; you should be more comfortable talking to me.

I’m sure they’re gonna make us introduce ourselves when we start our classes. Are you still going to be so nervous then?

Epel: It’s not like I choose to talk like this...

Ace: What does that mean? You’re nervous ‘cause it’s our first day of school?

Then you’re absolutely going to be nervous on our first day of classes, when you’re surrounded by people you don’t know.

Alright, here. I’ll show you how to introduce yourself.

My name’s Ace Trappola. I came here all the way from the Rose Kingdom.

My favorite food’s cherry pie. What about you?

Epel: Huh...?

Ace: Come on, fast!

Epel: M-My name is Epel... Epel Felmier. I live in... uh, it’s a secret...

I’m good at carving apples... I think. And I like... m-macarons...

Ace: Oh yeah? Macarons. Seems about right. That’s the kinda vibe I get from your looks.

Epel: ...And also BBQ.

Ace: BBQ?!

Ahaha! Who would’ve thought! You really aren’t all like you seem!

Epel: I-I don’t remember saying anything funny...!

???: Hm...? I think I heard a voice just now...

Epel: Ah!

Ace: Crap, someone’s here! Hide!

Riddle: Ace Trappola! Epel Felmier! Where are you?

Come out if you can hear my voice.

Epel: Is that... Heartslabyul’s dorm leader...?

Ace: Shh! Be quiet...!

Riddle: Honestly... I can’t believe they disappeared from the entrance ceremony. I hope they’re not in trouble or anything.

However...

If they were simply trying to skip the ceremony, they will have to be put on trial.

Epel: T-Trial...?!

Ace: Just stay quiet.

Epel: ......

Riddle: Ace, Epel, where are you? ...I guess they’re not in the courtyard. I’ll go back inside.

Ace: ......

Epel: ......

Ace: Phew, we managed to stay hidden. We’re good now.

Epel: Ahh... I couldn’t breathe...

Ace: Sorry. But it’s better than the dorm leader finding us, right?

Epel: You’ve been really pushy this whole time, Ace-kun.

Ace: Don’t say that! You should be happy we got to see the campus before all the other freshmen!

Alright, we should get back before that demon dorm leader catches us.

I hope the sorting’s almost done~ I’m really tired of watching it.

Epel: It’s true there are about.... 200 freshmen... I think.

Ace: Egh, so many!! So that’s why it takes forever.

So how many students is that per dorm...?

Epel: ...Uh, there are seven dorms, so around 30...?

Ace: Wow... I barely managed to get through that boring entrance ceremony...

But next we’re going to have to line up in groups of 30, and walk over together to our dorms... Man, it’s a hassle.

Epel: You seem like the type that doesn’t like moving with groups, Ace-kun.

Ace: I mean, you do too.

Epel: ...Yes. A little bit.

Ace: Hehe. Well, let’s get going. Our dorm leaders might be scary, but let’s have fun this school year!

Nice to meet you, Epel!

[septicstories]

A/N: For some unfathomable reason, I get some fantasy BNHA vibe from the song, Ophelia by the Lumineers. not even the lyrics. Like, the instrumental. It also, for some reason, gives me such an intense feeling of nostalgia that it sort of makes me want to cry? And I don’t know why? Actually wait. Seeing that this song is from the same guys who performed “Ho Hey” that makes a bunch of sense. Okay, anyways, I’m just gonna write a Kiribaku fantasy thing. Just some fluff, nothing super major.

I, I, when I was younger

“Kacchan! Quit running off! Your mother is bound to be worried sick!”

“Shut up, Deku! I’m gonna be fucking fine! C’mon!”

“Kacchan!”

The two young boys ran through the forests. Katsuki had recently turned twelve, given his first sword. Nothing fancy, just a small cutlass. In a week, he’d get his very first tattoo. But only if he collected an animal’s blood. 

Easiest way to do that?

Kill it and bring it back to his village.

I, I, should have known better

“Uh, Kacchan? Do you see that?” the younger green haired boy asked.

Katsuki glanced in the direction, seeing that there was a pair of bright red wings popping out of the bushes.

“Is that a dragon?” the green haired boy whispered.

“No one’s ever had dragon blood for their tattoo before!” Katsuki whispered back with a feral grin.

The grin was odd and misshapen, something he didn’t do often. It hadn’t quite grown on the ash blond yet.

“Oi! Dragon! Show yourself!”

Katsuki took his cutlass, slicing through the bush. As the leaves and branches from the bush fell, the front of the dragon was revealed.

And I can't feel no remorse

A black haired boy looked up at him with big red eyes. A pair of horns protruded from his forehead, their base a bright red. A tail stuck out of the other side of the bush, also bright red.

“Sorry! No hurt, please,”

Katsuki dropped his cutlass to the ground.

A dragon shifter.

They were a rare species, only two thousand known in the world throughout time. 

“Are you hurt?” the green haired boy popped up beside Katsuki.

“Uh... wings. Stuck. Help?”

“Come with me afterward,” Katsuki said firmly.

“Huh?! Kacchan?! What are you doing?”

“Shut the fuck up, Deku,”

The boys freed the dragon shifter before Katsuki led him back to his parent’s castle.

“Oi, hag! Bring us a medic!” Katsuki yelled into the castle, kicking a door open.

“For fuck’s sake, Katsuki! Did you hurt Izuku aga--”

Queen Mitsuki entered the room, ready to whoop her son’s ass, only to find her son and the boy she called her nephew in perfect health. A third boy with dragon wings, scales, and horns, however, was not.

“Oh. Uhm... hello,” she said calmly.

The dragon boy gave a bow as Mitsuki called for a few medics.

And you don't feel nothing back

“Kacchan, it’s so weird for you to help someone like that. What about your tattoo?”

“Dumbass. Don’t you know that dragon shifters are a rare species? If I fucking killed one, I’d die, for sure. I’d be hunted down. And it felt... different. Like I couldn’t kill them, even if they weren’t a dragon shifter. I... they feel different,”

Katsuki sat outside of the infirmary where the dragon boy stayed.

Behind the door, the shifter had sat, listening. That was something he was good at. Listening. He didn’t know what most of it meant. He didn’t speak their language. Hell, he rarely spoke.

But hearing what the ash blond boy had to say made him feel weird. His tail thumped against the cot he sat on, a happy chirp leaving his mouth.

When Katsuki came back to see the dragon shifter, he was pounced on, happy chirping noises escaping his mouth. 

“What’s wrong with you?”

“Master! Teach fight!”

“What?! Master?”

“You save me. I stay until I save,”

Katsuki sat there, baffled. A dragon shifter wants to be his? And a cute one at that?

“So, you wanna know how to fight, huh?”

I, I, got a new girlfriend

“No fucking way, really?” Katsuki was snapped from his memories by Sero gawking at the drunken purple haired bard.

“Mhm! She’s super duper pretty,” she slurred happily. “She’s a princess!”

“Congrats!” Mina, the pink haired barkeep said with a smile.

“Oh, it’s Princess Yaoyorozu, right?” Tenya asked, sipping lightly from his glass of wine.

“Mhm! Momo is so great,” Jirou beamed.

Katsuki rolled his eyes, scoffing at Jirou’s words.

She feels like he's on top

The dragon prince-- no, king-- had changed greatly since he met the dragon shifter, Eijirou.

Katsuki’s original kingdom was attacked, his family and his people killed. It was bloody and traumatizing. He actually needed saving from Eijirou.

But he never left.

And I don't feel no remorse

“Oh! Katsuki!” Eijirou tugged on the king’s cape. “Look! Miss Frog brought her wife!”

He looked behind the bar to see Ochaco and Tsuyu, smiling sweetly at each other.

“Get a room!”

Denki and Sero laughed beside Katsuki before Ochaco flipped him off.

And you can't see past my blinders

“Ochaco, relax, kero,” Tsuyu mumbled.

“Yeah, Katsu’s just jealous that he can’t have what we have,” Ochaco said with a smile, pressing a kiss to her girlfriend’s nose.

“You want to be a lesbian?” Eijirou whispered to Katsuki, who choked on his brandy.

Eijirou frantically waved his hands. “Sorry! Hurt?”

Whenever Eijirou found himself flustered or speaking quickly, his speech would go back to the broken language he used when he was a child. It got his point across, it just wasn’t the most eloquent.

Oh, Ophelia

“I’m fine, shitty lizard,” he mumbled. “No, I don’t want to be a lesbian. I don’t like women. I would just want to date someone and... be happy with them, you know?”

“Oh! Dragons do that! We bite the neck of our mate, give our mate a mark!”

“What, some sort of binding mark?”

Eijirou nodded happily, a small chirp leaving his throat.

You've been on my mind girl since the flood

“Why hasn’t Ei gotten drunk?” Mina asked.

“Dragons don’t drink. Alcohol to them is like feeding chocolate to a dog,” Katsuki scoffed. “Figure you would’ve fucking known that since he’s declined your alcohol consistently for the past several years,”

“Mhm! Alcohol killed my family,” Eijirou said with a soft smile.

“Oh,” Denki murmured.

After the sudden dark turn, it was quiet. But only for a moment.

“Hi, Kacchan!”

Katsuki rolled his eyes, turning to the green haired boy, who had Prince Shouto walking behind him.

“Done fucking the prince yet? Or are you still his spite boyfriend?” Katsuki snarled.

“How dare y--” “Shou, it’s okay,”

“Ah? Having the lapdog shush the prince? Doesn’t that deserve some sort of punishment?” 

The shit eating grin on Katsuki’s face grew as Izuku’s face flushed at the word.

“Don’t be rude,” Eijirou hissed, smacking Katsuki’s shoulder. “Sorry for Katsuki. He is drunk.”

Oh, Ophelia

“Ah, it’s alright, Eijirou!” Izuku said with a grin.

“The master disobeying his dragon? Doesn’t that deserve some sort of punishment?” Shouto asked, giving a smug ass grin.

Katsuki’s grip on his glass tightened, the glass making a creaking noise.

“Shou!”

“What does he mean by that? I did not do anything wrong, did I? Did I go against a human rule again?” Eijirou whispered.

“No, Prince Shouto’s just being an asshole,” Katsuki mumbled.

“Stop being mean!” Eijirou said before pouting a little. “You’re better than that,”

Katsuki felt his heart clench at his oddly adorable dragon servant.

Actually, was servant the word to use? He didn’t feel as though Eijirou was his servant or inferior to him. Much more like a friend. 

One day, hopefully more.

Katsuki groaned, smacking his head with the heel of his palm. He needed to stop thinking like that. Eijirou would be a friend and nothing more.

Heaven help a fool who falls in love

So maybe Katsuki did end up falling in love with his dragon shifter friend. What did it matter?

He wasn’t going to act on his urges to kiss him, hold him, tell him he loved him- no! That’s preposterous! 

From time to time, he wonders what his mother would think of him if she saw him now:

Sitting in a bar as a dragon king, making fun of the prince of another kingdom, sitting beside his dragon shifter friend who he also held high affection for.

He was fucked, wasn’t he?

“Why did you hit yourself? Was there an insect? I could have gotten it for you,” Eijirou asked.

“You are not eating a fucking insect off my head again,”

“It was one time!”

“One time too many!”

I, I, got a little paycheck

“Anyway, Katsuki, we didn’t come here to hear endless innuendos,” Shouto sighed, pulling out a silken sack.

It jingled happily as it was dropped in front of Katsuki.

“We came here for the--”

“Yeah yeah, you came here for the head of that beast. I know. Ei, you got the satchel?”

“Right here!” Eijirou said, holding the heavy satchel, dripping in black blood. “The head is in a bag inside of the satchel. So grab the bag inside. Do not wear white gloves, I suggest black as that is the color of their blood,”

“Thank you, Eijirou,” Izuku said, giving a quick bow as he replaced his white gloves for black ones.

Katsuki was handed the sack and he popped it open.

“Ei, coin toss,” he growled, taking a golden coin and flicking it behind me.

Coin toss is what they’ve done to see if the money is genuine. Katsuki toss a coin behind him, Eijirou nibbles on it for a second, and then he gives it back if it’s good. If it’s bad, he eats it.

If he eats even a single coin, he has Katsuki’s permission to beat the shit out of them.

You got big plans and you gotta move

“Must you do this every time?” Shouto asked

“What, you give us a shit coin?” Katsuki asked, flipping Eijirou the next coin.

“No’ ye’,” Eijirou said, catching the coin between his teeth. “All solid,”

“Good. And yes, we fucking do, asshole,” Katsuki scoffed. “You could scam us out, and we’d have to kill ya for it,”

“Be nishe, Katshuki!” Eijirou said before slipping the coin out of his mouth.

And I don't feel nothing at all

“Hey guys, we’re gonna go head toward the inn! Heard they had a bonfire going! We also need to drop off our horses,” Sero said with his signature grin.

“Yeah, yeah,” Katsuki scoffed.

After quickly checking the rest of the coins and making sure they were genuine, Katsuki closed the silken sack.

“Thanks,” he grumbled out.

“Sure thing, Kacchan! It was a pleasure to work with you!”

“Fuck off!”

And you can't feel nothing small

“Hey, Katsuki?”

“What is it?” Katsuki asked, turning to Eijirou.

“I want to show you a place,”

“Oh yeah?” Katsuki had a smirk cross his face. “Where to, Shitty Lizard?”

“Come with me!”

Eijirou and Katsuki left the bar, leaving a few gold coins with small dents in them on the counter.

Eijirou stood behind the building, removing his clothing as not to rip them before Katsuki placed them in the satchel.

A few moments later, the redheaded hybrid became a full dragon, and the two tore up into the sky at vicious speeds.

But once they were over the clouds, Eijirou slowed to a glide.

“Nice job on speed. Doing better,”

A deep rumbling chirp came from Eijirou as they continued to soar above the clouds, Katsuki relaxing happily on Eijirou’s back.

Honey I love you, that's all she wrote

The duo began their descent, landing at the base of a mountain as Eijirou shifted back.

“So, what did you want to show me?” Katsuki asked, handing Eijirou his clothing.

“Top of the mountain,” Eijirou said, yanking on his clothes.

Katsuki blinked for a moment. “Then why the hell didn’t you fly us up there?”

“The path there is very pretty too,” Eijirou said, making Katsuki huff.

“Fine. Whatever. Let’s fucking go,”

Oh, Ophelia

The boys began their hike up the mountain. Nothing too rigorous, but still harder than a simple walk. Not like the two minded, though. They’ve grown used to things that take up far more energy than a hike.

“So, where exactly did you bring me?” Katsuki asked, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

“Oh, we are climbing up a mountain. I cannot remember the name at the moment, so my apologies,” Eijirou chuckled, tugging at his scarf a tad.

“Fucking great. Any sort of civilization nearby?”

“Uhm... I believe there is a village that sits on the shore,”

You've been on my mind girl like a drug

Katsuki put a finger in his mouth, and after a moment, he pulled it out and held it to the sky.

The light breeze hit his wet finger tip, only a small part of it being cold.

“We in the East?”

After a moment, Eijirou nodded.

“Yes, yes!”

“And there’s a village by the water?”

Oh, Ophelia

“Yes, you will see it once we reach the top!” Eijirou chirped.

“So does the name Tuft Mountain ring any bells?”

“Oh, yes, yes!”

“And you wanted to show me the peak of Tuft?”

“Mhm!”

Heaven help a fool who falls in love

Katsuki knew what Eijirou was doing.

Anyone with half a damn brain cell knew what he was doing.

Oh, Ophelia

“YOU’RE FUCKING TAKING ME TO LOVER’S POND?!”

You've been on my mind girl since the flood

“Hush, hush! You’ll disturb the wildlife!” Eijirou said, thankful for the dark of the night that covered his flushed face.

The two reached the peak, and Katsuki’s eyes widened.

Oh, Ophelia

The pond was surrounded by gorgeous flowers and other wild grasses, waving in the breeze nonchalantly.

Fireflies dotted the sky, their little lights glowing up against the water’s surface.

The pond itself was an irregular heart shape, yet it was naturally formed.

Heaven help a fool who falls in love

Legend says that those who sit at one side of the pond will have their soulmate appear at the other side.

This could take minutes, hours, days, months, weeks, even years.

The pond is for those who are willing to wait for their soulmate.

Oh, Ophelia

Eijirou went and sat at one end of the pond, and waited.

Katsuki felt a tug.

You've been on my mind girl like a drug

As though he was being forced closer to the pond.

His head foggy and walk awkward, his body slowly made it’s way to the other side of the pond.

Oh, Ophelia

The two boys gawked at each other, vermilion and scarlet eyes locking, jaws dropping.

Katsuki knew what had just happened and knew what he’d done, but he hadn’t felt as though he was in control of himself.

A smile bloomed on Eijirou’s face.

He covered his mouth with his hands as tears clumped up in his lashes.

His tail thumped on the ground, wings beating, and sobbing chirps of joy escaping his mouth.

Katsuki felt his eyes water as well as he grinned.

Heaven help a fool who falls in love

A/N: Okay! Thank you so much for reading this! I sincerely hope you enjoyed it! I just get sudden impulses to write, so I do, and then you get this. Ooh! I’ve also never done this before, but I’m gonna start a tag list! I’ll do this for every story! I’ve only got one person and my beta readers, but feel free to ask to be on the tag list! You’ll get a notif for any oneshot I post! Or story! If you want to see my artwork, then please make that specification. So I’ll tag you in both or one or the other. Okay? Okay!

Tag list: @king-queenie, @violet-fandom, @siivermoon​,

Okay! That’s all! Thank you!

[whitecrownsblackthrones-archived]

I’ll tell you what Royal you are based on your Aesthetic choices

Sun King/Queen

You are bright, you are light, you have a certain vibe that just seems to draw people to you. You are the center of your court, everyone wants to be around you, even BE you, and you adore being at the center of everything. Yet, for as bright as your are, you are also fiery, your temper is short and you burst easily into rages. Take caution, your majesty, for as much as your want to be loved, you must equally be careful not to burn everything you draw towards you to ash and cinders.

Forest Prince/Princess

You're a person of simple means, never liked the extravagate, and preferred living care free. Much like the animals of the woods, or the flowing water of a river, you live without stress, without worry, and without home.  Your more at peace floating down a lake to wherever the water takes you, then you are lying in the bed of a stuffy castle. The wind is beneath your wings as they say, and your wings take you high into the treetops, where you can gaze down at the world's natural beauty without speech & without responsibly; indeed, as free as a bird.

Moon Emperor/Empress

Cold and distant, indeed much like the moon itself. You are the only majesty which matters, but it is not just you who think this, the few around you think this as well, and seek your approval at ever turn, which you give sparingly, if ever at all.  It's not that you hate others, you just found it hard to trust, you're the ruler of the kingdom after all, you know there are plenty how would use your power for their own gain; perhaps even kill you to take it all for themselves.

Tyrannical Emperor/Empress

Your heart is blacker then even night. Only one thing truly matters to you, and that is yourself. You were put on the throne for a reason, and that reason could only be that your are better then everyone else. A ruler is at the top of the chain, everyone else comes after. You held onto your crown with a vice grip and did not hesitate to send those who spoke out against you to their death. You were cruel and uncaring, both to the court and the commoners, and the people knew fear under your reign of terror, while you lavished in riches and luxury.

Tagging - @tetsuwan-atom​, @fxtelism​, @fckin-multi​, @frznkingdom​, @akumanoken​, @graceful-cure-swan​, @lachrymosestorm​, @x-ame-x-damnee-x​/@scared-x-solanaceae & whoever else wants to do this!