#it’s the end of the world as we know it 🎶

[alyjojo]

Pluto is 0’ Aquarius, and the entire astrological community is FREAKING OUT rn. Because the last time this happened, a lot of revolutions happened…on the world stage, it’s way more intimidating.

In personal charts, almost everyone deals with a squared Pluto in their lifetime. Millennials. Pluto Scorpios. You’re up. It’s just part of growing up. Ask your favorite Aries, Libra (squares), Cancer (who had the opposition), and Capricorn (conjunct) placements about the last 20 years for them. They all had a double whammy with Saturn in Capricorn for two years during the same time period, 2017-2019.

Whichever House is ruled by Aquarius will be completely transformed by definition for you. It’s meant to be that way 🙏 There are thousands of resources available to research to your heart’s content, about your specific placements, for those feeling nervous. It’s hard to predict 20 years.

The most powerful of placements is the conjunction, Aquarius, when Pluto is on top of one of your own planets, and within 2-3 degrees. Big changes.

Next is the opposition (Leo placements) within 2-3 degrees. Very challenging energy for them.

Positive energy comes from Trines & Sextiles (Gemini, Libra, Aries & Sagittarius) placements, within 2-3 degrees. Those keep us sane right? 😆

Taurus & Scorpio face the squares, also difficult & challenging energy, within 2-3 degrees.

When Pluto is not within 2-3 degrees of other things in your chart, positively or negatively, life will go on as normal, with a focus on clearing the slate & rebuilding the themes of your Aquarian house (we all have one, if intercepted, still that house), and however that energy works for you. Over time of course. 20 years is a long time and eventually it will become just another part of regular life. It will retrograde back through Capricorn from June-Dec. Back to Aqua. Retrograding again Sept-Nov 2024, and then it continues on for good. And everyone will go back to freaking out about Saturn 😆 Those with early fixed degrees 0-5 or so will get hit several times during those periods. Go with the flow, and be open to what’s coming, that’s all that can really be said.

[thorneprincess]

OOC. my country's government if falling apart and the parliament is dissovling, and I'll have to vote for the fifth time even though I'm only 21 so if you see me having a break down over this. no you didnt ❤

[k4marina]

— mornings || s.r

thots thots thots bby.

more horny shit for you horny fucks

synopsis: just a little smooching (and some more) with simon

warnings: 🎶it’s getting hit in here, so take off-🎶 kidding, slight sexual themes, language, simping on both ends, this is rusheddddd

simon”ghost”riley x fem!reader

IMPORTANT THINGY AT THE END!!

“sweetheart,” that thick manchester accent oozed out like honey. it was rare for simon to fully speak with his accent, but whenever he did it was in the mornings like now.

he let out a deep groan, shifting his hips, moving you around a bit. you sat perched on his lower abdomen, lips darting from his neck to his jaw and to his chest. simons hands were firm on your hips, less to keep you but himself steady.

“i need to.. fuck..” he sucked in a breath when your lips made contact with a slightly sensitive spot on his neck, by his ear. “i.. i need to get to work. i can’t be late.”

you hummed, eyes closed and savoring the feel and taste of him. “almost there. what’s the rush?”

he scoffed, his hands subconsciously making small circles on your hips. “i cant be late- we can’t be late.”

you groaned. “fine fine.” you led a trail of kisses and small bites up his neck to his lips, capturing him into a deep kiss. your hand came up to caress the side of his head while one of his hands went to the back of your head, pulling you down more.

the kiss was slow and meaningful. biting and pulling at each others lips, tongues swirling together with your teeth occasionally rubbing against each other.

when you finally pulled back, panting and dazed, a small string of saliva connected your lips to his.

god, how you wished you could always spend your mornings like this. feeling nothing but each other with no care in the world, kissing as if it were your last kiss. leaving simon, the ghost panting, dazed, and slightly flushed from nothing but a few kisses.

-

“love.” simon called out from the bathroom. you sat on the edge of the bed, pulling on your military cargo pants. you leaned back, “yeah?”

simon walked out, cargo pants on but no shirt letting his toned and chiseled torso on full display (not that you were against it). he pointed towards his neck and chest, specifically at the dark hickeys that littered his chest and neck.

you purses you lips, “what?”

“you really think i can go into work like this?”

you scoffed, “if i could go after what you did to me last week, then yes you can go like that.”

you got up, walking over to him, arms around his neck. “besides, you’re always covered up. it’s not like anyone will see anyways.”

“you little..”

-

it’s safe to say that both you and simon arrived late to base that morning. both of you sporting a new look around your necks.

wow another rushed fic? if there’s any mistakes lmk i wrote this at the dead of night so my brain isn’t doing very brainy things.

ALSO, IMPORTANT THINGY !!!!!!

idk how many of you will actually read this, BUT if you do, i’m just letting you all know that my request are open so if y’all want time to write smt for simon or idk who else then drop and thing. i’ll do my best but no promises.

[loveemagicpeace]

💿Some of life things in astrology💿

✨Venus in cancer - I usually see that these people always include parents in their daily life , in their love life , in their life in general. Also they always include their parents in their vlogs. They will always post their parents on social media or doing videos with them.

🎶People who have aquarius in 2nd house have the best taste in music. They have their own music that they listen to, but people always like it. They just put some song and people will love it.

🍸Mercury is how you express yourself and in which way and also shows how good you are in texting with people and how you are in contact with others.

🦭Mercury in capricorn- they are not such a good texter actually.I would say that they will texting you about: I don't know about time or place you two will meet or practical things. But they will not text you like 24/7 or something they are too busy. And also I feel like capricorn usually think they wasting their time texting someone things that don't usually have any meaning or are not practical.

🦋Mercury in scorpio- dig deep into things. Sometimes even too deep. In the sense that they go so deep into the things they want to find out ,that they hurt them at the end. One thing they have is, that they feel better when they find out things by themselves than when they find out from others. They are very deep thinkers and very deep in conversations they don't like small talks and they will always want to go deep with you in every conversation they will have. When you hurt them they will be harsh and very mean to you because when they speak they speak to their emotions.

❤️‍🔥Fire signs are confident, driven, lively and full of energy. They like to be mentally and physically active. They are also dreamers who measure their height. Fire signs are competitive.

🖤Earth signs are more in tune with nature and their bodies. They are reliable, tough, practical partners and friends. Earth signs take time to master a skill.

💕Air signs are mental and need a lot of communication. They like to remain objective. They often negotiate for justice. They value freedom and dislike conflict.

🩵Water signs are by nature creative, imaginative, dreamy and often very ignorant. Water is associated with emotions and the unconscious. They can be visionaries and have many ideas clairvoyant abilities. Water signs care about the environment and by nature feel with everyone and everything around them.

🌞God of Sun is Apollo. It is carved in the sanctuary of Apollo in Delphi the ancient saying "Know thyself". Because with the sun we ask ourselves "who am I?" and "why am I here?". Because with the sun we feel that our lives have meaning, that we were born with a mission that we must fulfill, and we want to know what it is supposed to be.

The sun represents its essence and indicates our goal in life. With the sun, we can discover qualities and find ways to use them in our lives. This can mean that we engage in a certain activity or wear colors with a connection to the sun. Just as Apollo rides in his fiery chariot across the sky, so the sun represents a heroic journey through life. Therefore, we can connect it to the work we do or should do performed in the world. The path of the sun is usually not very clear and, just like the heroic myths say, there are many pitfalls to overcome and lessons to be learned. It is these difficult tasks that test our limits, they confront us with loss and sacrifice and force us to become the best we can be. The Sun together with Saturn represent the father principle. The sign in which our sun is describes experiences with the father figure. In childhood, our first hero is the father.

🫧Nobody talks about how lonely you can feel with Uranus in the first house. Because it's the part of your personality and Uranus could make you feel that you don't belong somewhere or you feel some kind of distance in this house. When it's in in your first house you could feel that being around people make you lonely or doing some things alone for ex.: eating alone in the restaurant this could be the problem for you because you could feel very lonely when you do some things in the public alone or I don't know going to the coffee alone.

🌟Planets return show you things that you are not aware of it or you're not expressing them. For example Mercury return can show you the whole new perspective about things and could change your mindset for the better. Venus return can show you the new value about you or what you value about others. You are more aware now what u actually want. Where do you find real love. Mars return it can show you a new way to be brave, fearless and go outside your comfort zone. And where is your energy best expressed and through what. You can show your anger more during this time.

🍿It’s really hard to forget people with whom you share 4th House this is because they make you feel the most familiar and the most comfortable around them. It's like the family kind of vibe.It feels like coming home and being with them it's like being in the safe and secure environment. 4th house represents our home , the people that are closed to us , the space when you feel the most comfortable and people with whom you feel the most comfortable with.

🧜🏼‍♀️ Venis trine Uranus- I find this aspect so unique because you actually fall in love with the person's uniqueness and differentness they have. You actually love them for it. You love that this person is different and is not the same that anyone else. For ex.: it could be you don't like face tattoos or you don't like someone who dress extra but when you meet this person you actually love this on them. This relationship can be unique and so different than the others.

🧚🏼‍♀️Uranus in 1st house in synastry- it's kind of the same vibe that with uranus conj venus but it's not because when you first meet this person you feel like this person is different than the others and that they have some unique energy that nobody else has. You feel like this person is special and so unique. That their personality could be so different than the others. It's like you can try to find someone else but you feel like nobody else could compare to this person.

🌙Personal planets appear faster in synastry and the first time you meet the person (especially: sun, moon, mercury). And, of course, rising sign :which indicates the energy of a person when you meet them. But here's the trick with rising sign that many times the true energy of a person can be hidden and only show up after a while when you get to know the person better. 💧The outer planets, however, manifest themselves over the years, when the persons already know each other very well and have a relationship.

🧸3rd house not only represents communication, mind,car ,electronics ,social media ,telephones and any of this stuff. It's also represents your early high school experience and also people who were with you in your high school. Your high school first love and how it feels like. Your high school best friend. So every person you have a 3rd house synastry with is usually a person you met at that time. A lot of people you share third house with or the sign you have in the third house is meant to be for you to meet them actually.

🎸The best time you will have with the person and the best things you will experience with the people are people u share 9th house. This house is ruled by Jupiter the luckiest Planet. This is the house of gifts. The girt from God, so when you meet the people you share this house with it's a gift that actually was brought into your life. All the things you will experience with these people will actually mean something to you. Because 9th house is meaningful house is where you find meaning, where u seek for meaning , when u actually find optimism. The person's u share this house with can actually inspire you the most or give you the most luckiest advice.

🧁I believe that it's not only 5th house that represents memories, but every house represents some memory you have from your early childhood. Every house is something special. The sign that you have in this house is the sign that reminds you most of this event of your life. So for ex.: aries in 3rd house -maybe this person were your best friend and remind you the most of your high school experience. Taurus in 4th house- this person maybe remind you the most of your home or your childhood, family life. Maybe you grew up with this person. Leo in 8th house-this person probably reminds you most of a dark/deep period of your life. Maybe you could spend the most intense times with this person and share the most secrets.

🎸For personal readings u can sign up here: https://snipfeed.co/bekylibra 🎸

-Rebekah💿🧚🏼‍♀️☁️

[netherfeildren]

Fear of God : Masterlist

Artwork is The Goldfinch by Carel Fabritius

Pairing: Joel Miller x OFC

Summary: What was monstrousness? What was it, but a certainty that there existed within you multitudes of desires, needs, guilts, impulses – humanity? At the end of the world, when the dust has finally settled, Joel grapples with what it is to take hold of your own monstrosity – your own humanity – and live with it. And what it is to bear that truth in the palm of your hand held towards the person you love, offer it to them, and have it be accepted for what it was. Courage, above all else, it is courage that is necessary to go on.

-OR-

Big bad Joel Miller falls in love and doesn't know how to deal with it.

Rating: Explicit 18+

Content: Age gap, smut, angst, grief, PTSD, canon typical violence, discussions of medical procedures/illness, emotional unavailability, pregnancy

Word Count: 55K

Read on AO3

Chapter I: I dreamt that time had ended

Chapter II: Although a monster [Joel] could be charming in company

Chapter III: Your bitter heart, heals my heart

Chapter IV: Mouth full of blood

Chapter V: Love humiliates you

Chapter VI: The indignity of suffering

Chapter VII: For: Before

Chapter VIII: The Fisher King

Chapter IX: What should we believe in next?

Epilogue: Birdie

Birdie's House: Extras

Did the loneliness die that night?

Summary: Birdie and Joel’s first time.

I am a lantern

Summary: Birdie realizes she’s pregnant.

Joel

Summary: Writing exercise, not part of canon story line - Joel passes away.

My Whole Life

Summary: The family celebrates Joel’s birthday.

Updates Blog : Follow and turn on notifications for new writing!

🎶 FoG Companion Playlists:

- Apple Music

- Spotify

(This is not only a compilation of songs that reminded me of the story, but also songs I listened to over and over again during my writing process)

[ninadove]

LUKA:

So I was dating Marinette but it didn’t work out and at the time I believed it was because of Adrien. But then we all hung out as friends and I was like "damn I understand why you would fall for him he’s pretty cute". Shortly after I discovered Marinette was Ladybug and that was the real reason we couldn’t be together. But now that I knew I figured we could try again. Except one Second Chance later I also found out Adrien was Chat Noir and I thought "oh there it is they’re soumates my two crushes are meant for each other so I guess there’s nothing left for me to do except for dying alone". Despite my best efforts I kept thinking about them and how cute they both looked in their superhero suits. What made it a thousand times worse was that they would still come to me for therapy and complain about each other. But I hit an entirely new low when I got turned into a CD trying to protect them from Monarch. I got better of course but then I had to mail myself to the other end of the world in case someone else wanted to turn me into a CD. Before I left Marinette gave me such a romantic look and Adrien gave me an even more romantic look just to really really drive the point that I’m doomed by the romantic narrative home. So then I spent the next few months learning kung fu to punch my feelings out because airport security wouldn’t let me bring my guitar and when I came back we all went back to being this huge team and working together again. Long story short I still have feelings for both but they’re dating each other now. So I guess there’s nothing I can do about it.

Anyways you’ve been in the exact same situation with the exact same two people. So I guess my question is: how do I move on?

KAGAMI:

Do not worry, Marinette’s friend Luka. I know exactly what you should do.

When is the next ball you’re forced to attend taking place?

LUKA:

Kagami I live on a boat my mother is a pirate

🎶 [ End credits ] 🎶

[larkandkatydid]

🎶🎶When You're Living in Amerrrrricaaaa at the End of the Millennnnniuuuumm🎶🎶: My favorite books about life in late 20th century America, with an emphasis on how the conversative turn in American politics affected lives on the margins: Wheel of Fortune, Sally Ride, Heavy metal suicide Foreign debts, homeless vets, AIDS, crack, Bernie Goetz* , etc:

(descriptions under the cut)

Rick Perlstein, Reaganland: America’s Right Turn. This is where you start. And honestly, the Reaganland Quartet, which this is the last volume of, is the Great Epic Fantasy of actual 20th century history.

Sarah Schulman, Let the Record Show: A Political History of ACT-UP New York 1987-1993. This book had a minute and then just faded from public discourse, which makes me so unbelievably sad. I know it’s long, but it’s riveting and energizing. This should be the book that We All Read and everyone peer pressures everyone else to read.

Kathleen Bellew, Bring the War Home: The White Power Movement and Paramilitary America. Another foundational classic about how the post-Vietnam War militarization of the white power movement led to the Oklahoma City bombing. It's also really good context for a lot of the great works that have come out recently about Waco. Also you can read this book instead of swallowing your dignity and giving zoom-masturbator Jeffrey Toobin your money.

Donovan X Ramsey, When Crack Was King: A People’s History of a Misunderstood Era. This could very well be the best book that came out this year, just a beautiful, empathetic, humanist view of the crack epidemic that perfectly balances the broader context with oral history.

Anna Lowensapt Tsing, The Mushroom at the End of the World: This is a weirder choice, but I think it aligns well with alot of the other topics on this list: the consequences of the Vietnam War, the economic collapse in the Pacific Northwest, a new kind of underclass in the global capitalist system...but about mushrooms.

Donna Gaines, Teenage Wasteland: Suburbia’s Dead End Kids. This is a journalistic work written in the 1980s but I think the social panic about (white) teenage suicide, heavy metal, satanism, etc is something that has gotten somewhat forgotten in histories of the 1980s. One thing that feels deeply Of that Time is how the end of the cold war made it harder for working class teenagers to "just" join the military.

Jason LaPerle, American Dream: Three Women, Ten Kids and a Nation’s Drive to End Welfare: Another deeply empathetic portrait of three women in Milwaukee and how the Clinton welfare reforms affected their lives.

Susan Faldo, Backlash. Look, you really do have to read this classic 1980s feminist brick. You do. It's infurirating and important and pretty fun too.

Mike Davis, Ecology of Fear: Los Angeles and the Imagination of Disaster: Mike Davis is the grim, communist Joan Didion; I love him and miss him. Davis also co-wrote a massive history of Los Angeles in the 1960s that I really recommend and an extremely non-massive history of the car bomb that I recommend above all.

[court-jastor]

🎵 "It's the end of the world as we know it" 🎶

[ghostkingdoesstuff]

A friendly reminder I am not to be held accountable for the things I'm about to say. Percy Jackson Season 1 FINALLY (SPOILERS BUT THAT'S THE LEAST OF YOUR PROBLEMS)

The visceral noise I made eating popcorn as Luke said "look you didn't ask to be a half-blood" caused an earthquake in Alaska, I'm sorry I was facing northwest.

"Riposte" I'm sorry, no I'm sorry no-

Also, the background of the sword fighting scene was very pretty.

Poseidon showing up for his son!!! Letts gooooooo! THE WEIGHT OF THE OCEAN UPON YEE!!!

Right in the heel, it's gotta hurt!

Percy asked his uncle to please return his mom, wholesome family gold.

"He'll kill you." "I done to stop running from monsters." "You're gonna need all the luck you can get." The show gets why these two work. Friends before anything else.

Glory as a theme is something that I like that the show highlights more. But Grover is right. at least send an insurance email or something. A quick "on my way, please don't kill anyone"

Dropping the master bolt on some poor dudes desk, legendary.

Olympus is so fucking beutiful omg

I'm gonna cry if Luke and Percy are in the same scene as each other in this episode again. ILL DO IT! THAT'S A THREAT!

The dead silence, I'm shitting omg... yes I know what happens and?

Followed by "I didn't steal it! Neither did any of my friends" IM GONNA CRY! IM GONNA DO IT

The pin strip suit, the sky blue paisley tie, the presence, the voice, THE KING OF THE GODS PEOPLE

Lotta talk for someone so small and scary

POISIDEN GETTING BETWEEN HIS SON AND HIS BROTHER I'M GONNA THROW UP

POSIDEN AND ZEUS SPEAKING GREEK I'M GONNA PISS

THE SEA DOES NOT LIKE TO BE RESTRAINED (🎶BRING ON THE MONSTERS BRING ON THE REAL WORLD!!!🎶)

SALLY JACKSON TEACHING PERCY GREEK I'M GONNA-

"Of course we dream. why do you ask?" "Do you ever dream about mom?" ;-;

Thalia looking strudy as ever.

"Ready?" NO FUCK YOU NO

Another reminder I am not to held liable for anything I might say, you need only see how many times I've listened to "Last day of Summer" from The musical to understand how much I've thought of this moment in fictional time.

Confirmation that Luke was indeed what mattered most in the end? I'm gonna make myself cry shit-

Honestly, this Percy might be too smart for his own good. Bro's never gonna live this heartbreak down.

"You...I'm here to recruit." I- fucking- AHHHH

"OUR WAY OUT" RICK YOU BASTARD I HOPE YOU ROT IN ASPHODEL

"Stop saying "we"!" "It’s the word Zeus fears the most."

AND SHE HEARD EVERYTHING! Wasn't she supposed to be watching Clarrise? He'll, if Percy could figure it out, I'm sure Annabeth would. It's worth it to see that LOOK on Luke's face. I'm sorry. Feel the weight of your actions, man.

Miss my old friend the pit scorpion but I also like my new friend "the first scars we gave eachother"

He knows Luke won't hurt him physically, but the psychic damage hurts more and has lasting status de buffs.

"Just be a kid" that's it

"I'll find you" that's it

Promising to meet again next summer...Percy just you wait.

THE FAKE OUT OF A LIFETIME

"Grandpa" "don't call him that"

They are the ultimate mother son duo

BLUE PANCAKES!

Kinda hate that Sally didn't intentionally do a murder, or at least she has a lot more possible deniability now, but I hope she still makes a sweet sale on that sculpture!

And that's it! Fuck it's over what to do now... RE READING THE LIGHTING THEIF LIFE BLOG COMING SOON! As well I'll probably drop a summary of my thoughts on the whole season at some point soon! Happy Finally, y'all! Can't wait to see the discorse!

[samheughanswife]

Musings on Vogue World 🎭 🎶 🎬 📺 🇬🇧 and what could have been.

Pondering the choices and priorities of someone I don’t know and watching his decisions during his SAG mandated haitus and it’s a case of saying huh!

Sam has spoken at length about wanting to return to his theater roots and also securing work in television and film in 🇬🇧. What better networking event than the VW extravaganza. Not to mention the fun and buzz of likeminded thespians, musicians and fashionistas having fun and raising money for the performing arts.

It was the night.

I’ve talked to a few likeminded people and we are all of the view that he was not invited to be a part of the program. This could be a likely reason for his absence (in theory), as all promotional work for his booze SS is done and he has no other projects due to the strike. So why not if invited?

Is it the case that his ⭐️ is not A/B list?! It’s a brutal consideration. Has Sam spent too much professional energy chasing HW projects and ⭐️ to the detriment of his 🇬🇧 credentials?

Not sure about the rest of you but I’m sick of seeing Sam’s face, hands, fingers and clothes used to connect him to random women (this is 🤢inducing) and places. He is being reduced to literally the sum of his body parts. He is at risk of becoming a bought and paid for ⭐️ at private cons for women who just see JAMMF with a side of 🥃 and🍸.

I can hear the screeching and hating all the way here in 🇦🇺 but hey, Kansas was 🙈 🫥

I had the pleasure and privilege of seeing James McAvoy in Cyrano de Bergerac in February 2020 in London just before the pandemic shut down the world. I remember thinking perhaps soon I would have the opportunity and pleasure to see Sam in a West End production. This seems unlikely any time soon. Hope that I will be proven wrong.

James is a favourite and I love that he was an usher in that fabulous tartan. And with the sunglasses, Dunhill jacket (remember when Sam wore Dunhill) it almost could be SRH.

MOO: my opinion only 😉

[lazyjellyfish300]

in my head, the aftermath of your traitor fic is that we find someone better and miguel tries to come crawling back but we’ve already moved on😭😭😭

I CAN NEVER LET A MAN HAVE THE UPPER HAND i always have to come out on top💀

Agreed! This is a situation where I'd definitely not get back with him lol 💀💀💀 Cheating on, and then with you?! No coming back from that. 😬 Here, I made a mini epilogue, themed after White Horse by Taylor Swift. (Sticking with the theme of break up songs like the first part) Don't worry, we get our happy ending but not with Miggy this time :'(.🫶🏽 Word count 916. CW: angst, mention of cheating ,pregnancy, slight suggestive if you squint

----

Traitor mini epilogue

Miguel O'Hara x Fem Spider-Woman Reader

First part

🎶Say you're sorry, that face of an angel comes out just when you need it to🎶 

The fiery crimson burns you once again, the familiar look in Miguel's eye propelling you backwards to three years ago when you were driving distraught past his street after he left you for good, only after fucking you while Xina, his supposed soulmate, was out of town. 

"I'm so sorry..." He rasps, those full lips of his in a pout that tug at the strings of your heart that once used to beat nonstop only for him. "Come back to me." 

You turn around and close your eyes. That's when it all clicks for you. This moment that you prayed would arrive one day finally did. The moment that his begging for you to come back no longer stirred the deepest parts of you, no longer sent an undying ache in your bones. The way he said your name no longer carried any sting. You were free at last. 

You shake your head, softly telling him goodbye for the final time, leaving him with his thoughts and his tears, the grip he had on you turning to shadow and mist with every step you took away from him. 

The image of you walking away would go on to haunt his dreams every time he dared to slumber. He finally understood the weight of the pain he left you with all those years ago. Now he could watch you as you left, leaving only himself to blame. 

   🎶And there you are on your knees

Begging for forgiveness, begging for me

Just like I always wanted but I'm so sorry

 'Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale   I'm gonna find someone someday

Who might actually treat me well

This is a big world, that was a small town

There in my rear-view mirror disappearing now

 And it's too late for you and your white horse

To catch me now...🎶

----

Captivating seas of baby blue greet you as Ben Reilly flashes you a stunning smile when you walk in. "Hi there, baby..." 

You giggle as he hoists you on the countertop, pressing a kiss to your soft belly, laying his cheek against it, humming to the sound of his tiny baby boy stirring inside it. You had hardly begun to show, keeping your tiny bump hidden under a comfy layer of sweatshirts. 

Your fingers tangle in his golden locks as he presses soft kiss after soft kiss into your belly, taking this time to worship you. His gorgeous gorgeous goddess carrying his baby. 

"You look so good today, love..." he purrs, massaging your tender thighs. 

You wave him off with a shake of your head. "I'm exhausted." 

He hums, letting his hands run up and down your shoulders. "Let's get you in bed, yeah?" 

You nod, wincing a little as he helps you down from the counter. "You okay? Did I hurt you?" He asks, his tone laced with worry as he cradles you like fine china, hugging you against his lean, muscular body as he brings you to your shared bed. 

"M'okay Benny..." 

"I know my girl... something's on your mind." He crawls in next to you, gesturing for you to come closer as he gets you properly situated on your pregnancy pillow. "Wanna talk about it? Or just rest?" 

You let out a tiny groan. "Just saw my ex today, he was begging for me back. I of course told him no. I'm very happy with you, and pregnant." You manage a weak smile as you stare back up into his handsome face. That smile of his was pain relief all on its own. 

"As he should..." Ben smirks, pulling you closer, taking care not to compromise your comfortable position too much that he carefully put you in with your body being cradled by the pillow. "I'm sorry you had to deal with that though, sweetheart." 

He kisses your hand. "This will never happen, but obviously if I'm ever stupid enough to let you go, I hope you smack me so hard I don't see straight for a week." 

You smile, shaking your head as the tip of your nose pressed against his, "I couldn't do that to you...I won't need to anyway..." Your lips meet his in a tender kiss. "You're so good to me, Ben..." 

"You're so good to me, angel. I should be the one thanking you..." He whispers, his hands coming down to softly touch your body in every spot that sends a flock of butterflies swarming your stomach. "For loving me, for carrying my baby...for just being you, beautiful." 

Your lips meet again, a little extra heated than before, a heavy pant leaves your lips. "Stay with me this afternoon? Don't want you to leave just yet...I need you a little longer..." 

Ben smirks, his hands moving gently down your body as he sits up a little more, caging you protectively underneath him, taking care not to squish your delicate growing belly. "As you wish, my lady...I'll stay with you all night. How's that?"

You smile, nuzzling closer into him, the smell of his cologne was faint on his neck, one of the few things that didn't trigger your morning sickness bringing you instead to a state of complete comfort and safety. "Mmm... perfect. I love you..." 

"I love you, babydoll...rest for me now, yeah?" 

You hum, falling asleep in his arms as he caresses your tiny bump.

[presidentlokis-hornyhelmet]

(I'm certain) I Know What You'd Say

Pairing: Pavitr Prabhakar x Reader Summary: Pavitr taking you to the tallest building in Mumbattan and feeding you vada paav + "is this a date?" + angst..?  Warnings: Unrequited Love, Pining, Platonic Relationship, Ambiguous/Open Ending (but not that ambiguous), Hopeful Ending, Low Self-Esteem, Reader POV, Negative Thoughts, Past bad Relationship, Italics indicate thoughts

Also read on AO3

🎶🎵I'd never ask you cause deep down I'm certain I know what you'd say You'd say I'm sorry believe me I love you but not in that way🎶🎵 Not In That Way by Sam Smith As usual, all Hindi words are Google Translated (pls don't 🔪 me) *Can also be read as Pavitr Prabhakar x lithro!reader

"Pavs!" 

Pavitr Prabhakar, aka Mumbattan's friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man, swings smoothly from a lamp post and dives with a twril to land before you. A smile pulls at your lips. Show off.

"Ready, N/n?"

You nod, circling your arms around his neck. He secures one arm around your waist, holding you close to his chest, and aims his web at a tall building. 

"Hold on tight. 3.. 2..1! WhooOHOOO!" 

You squeal excitedly as he swings from building to building, navigating effortlessly through the traffic. It's like riding a roller coaster except you're swinging. You heart pumps faster from the adrenaline rush and you wind yourself tighter around him, almost crushing him in fear as he swings higher and higher. 

"Hey", he says gently removing unwinding your arm, "You can open your eyes now." 

What feels like forever has been only a few minutes when you find yourself on the rooftop of a skyscraper in the middle of the city. 

The view is picturesque but you don't get to appreciate it for long, busy throwing up in the corner. Pavitr winces and turns his face away, peeling off his mask as he sits on the edge of the terrace. 

"Sssssorry..." 

Luckily you've brought water and you rinse your mouth, coming to sit beside Pavitr cautiously. 

"See? I told you it'd be fun!" 

"It is thrilling, but.. you sure we won't accidentally fall off? I mean..", your breathing picks up as you look below, "it's soooo high.." 

"Don't look down!"

Too late. The world around begins to spin as gravity calls for you. Oh no.. 

Pavitr pulls you back into safety and rubs your back in soothing motions. "Relax. I got'chu, N/n." 

"How do you do this everyday without getting your insides twisted!?" 

He shrugs as it's obvious. "I'm Spider-Man." 

"Yeah, because that explains everything", you sass, shooting him an unamused look. "Poor Gayatri, though." 

Pavitr flushes, eyes flitting everywhere but at you as he rubs his neck. "Uh, you're actually the first... she doesn't know yet.."

Oh, of course! You were the only one to know his secret identity. And not because he told you; you'd accidentally caught him crawl into his bedroom wall wearing the suit and you put two and two together. 

You set the street food you bought for this 'picnic' down. Seven vada pavs and two cardamom teas. 

"Did you just say I'm special?", you tease. 

"Nah, you're just lucky to catch me that night." 

You surprise him water to his face in playful retaliation, giggling. He reaches to grab your bottle but you keep it out of his reach, attacking him when he tries to shoot his webs. 

"Hey!" 

He laughs, trying to sheild himself, and, Gods, it's a beautiful sound. You stare entranced, the beautiful pink sunset painting a romantic backdrop as the last rays catch his wet hair, making it shine. The peachy colour falls on his tan skin and Pavitr looks ethereal. He wears that flirty smile that helps him charm his way out of chores, eyes sparkling and -wow, are you in a Bollywood movie? Surely, this must be a dream. 

Mmmm... <;3 

"I know, right!" 

His voice snaps you out of your reverie. What the hell, you were supposed to be in control of your emotions, not practically drool on your crush! 

"What?", you ask, hoping you didn't blurt out anything embarrassing. You have GOT to stop zoning out when he's right there.

His gloves are off and he holds a vada paav in each hand, stuffing both into his mouth. 

When did he-?

"The vada pav -Mmmm!", he moans with a full mouth, "this is The best food to ever exist! It's amrutha!" 

"All street foods are ambrosia for you." 

"No, no, this really is divine! Here, have a taste-" 

You let him feed you, enjoying it while it lasts with the painful knowledge that this won't mean as much to him the way it means to you. 

Your relationship was doomed to ever remain platonic but you will cherish these little moments of your unrequited love till the day you die, alone and still pining. 

Yeah... Pavitr has a girlfriend, who's none other than your mutual bestie, Gayatri Singh. Neither of them have told you yet, but it's obvious. The way they look at each other, always a twinkle in their orbs as they speak eye to eye -the love language of love. Little smiles, sneaky looks, inside jokes.. you feel left out, but maybe it is for the best. It's like, if you acknowledged it, then there will be no denying it and this love-castle you've built in your head will collapse. 

One-sided love is like the thorns in a rose: it hurts, but letting go means you can't admire the flower anymore. And, you've gripped the stupid thing with your whole palm and now you're bleeding. 

'It's not like anyone likes me, anyway', negative thoughts begin to plague you. 'I'm the odd one out, the outsider, the one that doesn't fit in. Invisible, unless they have a use of me.' 

Self-loathing was a dangerous wormhole and you only spiralled more into it as you recalled your ex. You had briefly dated another guy to take Pavitr off your mind but it ended poorly. Pavitr had been there for you then too but it did no good. What little self-esteem you had never increased after that. 

Realizing your eyes had moistened, you inhale sharply and look out into the city that never sleeps to distract yourself. 

You loved the night sky. Grandma always said that when people die, they become stars. Perhaps, one day, you'll be one too. Watch another poor soul like you pine over someone they can never have. 

A stray tear slips down your cheek and you're quick to wipe it away, hoping Pavitr didn't notice it. The last thing you want is for him to ask, because you know you'll blurt out your feelings and it'll be the end. 

You shake yourself out of it, pushing those thoughts away. Now isn't the time. You are here with Pavitr right now and that's all what's important.

"So cold up here." You shiver, rubbing your arms for warmth. He opens his mouth to retort when you cut him off. "If you say 'I can't control the weather Y/n', I WILL push you off." 

He just laughs. "Which King of Mumbattan's Streets would you rather", he asks, holding up another vada paav, "Pav or Pavitr?" 

"Easy. Vada pav." 

You snerk when he holds his chest in faux pain and reach for the snack, but he insists on feeding you. 

"I'm not trusting you at 200 feet high. Also, this is the last one so, we're sharing", he says and shifts closer to you.

Fingers slightly brush against each other, making you tingle and stop protesting as he feeds you again. Control, idiot, control! 

Even if he'll never treated you as a lover, it's okay, because just being next to Pavitr makes your day better. 

You sip your elaichi chai and watch the city in comfortable silence, welcoming Pavitr move closer. You mind goes on a fieldtrip when your shoulders touch and you try not to blush. Maybe even lean in a little, hoping he won't notice.. 

Loud honkings corrupt the quiet air as traffic increases in the city below you. You wonder what time it is, glancing at your watch and -OH MY GOD! 

You jerk and shoot up but lose balance, though Pavitr is quick to catch you before you slip and fall off the rooftop. 

"You okay there?" 

"It's past my curfew! Ma will take the broomstick out on me if I am not home in a few!" 

"Please, N/n, aunty is so sweet. You're making her look like a villain." 

"You're not the one who's gonna be grounded!" 

"Stop fretting, we'll be there in ten seconds tops." Pavitr assures you, packing up everything in record time and washes his hands. "Ready?" 

He circles his arm around your waist once again, holding securely and swings you home, reaching quicker than before. You land on the balcony of your house, surprisingly not puking this time, as he releases you gently. 

Neither of you move and he doesn't seem to let go any soon. Veins thrum in excitement.  

"We're early", he says softly looking into your eyes. 

The full moon is reflected in his orbs, the moonrays highlighting his features. You want to cry; such a beautiful, good hearted guy can never be yours. 

"Huh?" 

"It only took nine seconds." 

You can't help but blush at how his hands are still around your waist, loosened but still there, blood pumping hot under your skin. 

God, he's so close. 

"N/n..." 

He leans in, and for a moment you forget about everything as his intoxicating scent fills your nose. You beg the Gods to prolong this moment a bit longer. 

The sound of your mom yelling from behind the door breaks you apart. Pavitr pulls on his mask and jumps onto the railing, shooting his web onto a nearby building. 

The chilly wind blows through his hair and he looks every bit hero as he stands deific under the moonlight. 

"Thanks for the date, by the way."

His words take you by surprise. Hope fills your chest and you perk up, but quickly shut it down. 

It's not what I'm thinking; he doesn't mean it that way, he's joking. 

"It... was it a date?", you ask, slow and hesitant. You need him to say 'yes' but you're not sure what you'll do if he says 'no'. 

He's just kidding. Why did you even ask!? Why are you so stubborn that he'll like you back!? 

Pavitr's silence makes you anxious. His mask prevents you from seeing his reaction and you grow antsy, unable to decipher his feelings. 

"Maybe." 

And then, Pavitr's gone, leaving you to ponder over his words in the dark chilly balcony, alone. The city below moves about full of life yet you're frozen in place with your breath taken away. 

Maybe. 

______

Hope you enjoyed it! Kudos and comments feed my fic dragon <3

[ahundredtimesover]

Belong (05: Post-Credits) | MYG

Pairing: Yoongi x (f.) Reader

Genre/Tags: exes-to-lovers-to-exes-to-lovers; actress!OC x basketball coach!Yoongi; summer romance; “long” distance relationship; parallel timelines; angst, fluff, smut

Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, family drama, sport injury; dreams & moving away; allusion to depression; basketball and acting talk; 2014 and 2022 Yoongi; shy and nonchalant cocky whipped Yoongi; almost drowning, sexual content (kissing, oral, penetrative sex) (18+)

Chapter Word count: 5k

Series Masterlist

Status: Complete

Series summary: Being an actor has always been your dream. Pursuing it meant many things - leaving the town where you grew up, distancing yourself from your family that had fallen apart, and saying goodbye to the man who made you feel what home was like. When you decide to finally return after being away for so long, you meet Min Yoongi again, and you’re reminded of the summer romance from 8 years ago with the college basketball superstar whose broken dream pushed you away. As you find yourself spending time with him, you’re left to wonder if love changes, if it gives second chances, or if it’s just another illusion that will hurt the both of you the second time around.

A/N: Wrapping up this story and this world now, as I keep its meaning close to me, where this Yoongi was a source of comfort. Thank you to those who took a chance with this one. Please know that in the midst of deciding to stop writing, you told me I could keep going. 😌

It was nice to be able to write about a sport that I deeply love (yes, I am manifesting with the NBA game featured here 🤞🏽) and about a theme I’m personally experiencing. Yoongi told us to live in the present and that we can dream simple, gentle dreams, too. Let’s cheer each other on! 💜

Listen to: For All You Give (feat. Lucy Rose) by The Paper Kites || Playlist 🎶

1.5 years later

You walk past the hallways to head outside the airport, large luggage in one hand and a small one on the other. 

Your phone rings and Jimin is on the other end, asking if your flight was alright and if the weather is good. You give him a lowdown of the past 18 hours, including your lovely encounter with a Korean-American family during your Minneapolis layover. Their 6-year old is apparently a fan of yours after you did a stint of hosting her favorite Korean variety TV show, and your heart soared when she told you that she wants to be funny and beautiful like you. You found it amusing that doing cute poses and laughing your way through every episode was entertaining enough for her. 

“That’s adorable,” Jimin chirps. “I love how your fanbase gets younger every year. You started with grandparents and now you’ve got 6-year olds under your spell.”

“It’s amazing, isn’t it?” You laugh. “I just hope these kids don’t watch my latest movie because it’s gonna terrify them.”

“Yeah, at least keep the variety shows to entertain the babies,” he chuckles. “I already told Hoseok that you want to guest-host again. There are a couple of shows that want you onboard.”

“Ah, that’s great,” you beam. “I need as much joy and laughter in my life after that last project. That took so much out of me.”

“It did, didn’t it?” Jimin hums. “But it’s got the media buzzing about you again. So much for that one so-called journalist who claimed that you’re one-dimensional and can’t do anything other than romance because you’re only good at being in love. Let me smack her face with all the good reviews about your latest role so she can shut her one-dimensional mouth.”

You giggle at Jimin’s words, his protective nature soothing you like it always does. You remember when that article about you came out after you starred in a mini-series, a project you had after the show you filmed in Paris, which did turn out to be your biggest break then. Your role in that drama had you falling in love with someone from a rival family, one of the show’s major plot points, and that journalist went off about your supposed versatility being premised on the emotions of being in love. You can’t really do much outside of it, she said, and it was that same day when you got the lead role for a psychological thriller, with the industry’s eyes on you to see if you’re able to handle a character that’s so different from what you’re used to. 

And well, it’s safe to say you blew their minds. Even you didn’t think you could do that well, but you pushed hard, not only to prove yourself to them but to challenge yourself, knowing that there’s more to learn and showcase even after 10 years of being in the industry. 

The reviews showed that you delivered. Critics praised your acting, saying how disturbed they felt during specific scenes, and that was a compliment for you, knowing that was the goal. The movie was even shown in a recent foreign Film Festival, and the praises are still coming; Jimin’s been the one sending you every article and post he could find, and he’s been nothing short of amazing when it comes to encouraging and praising you himself for another successful project. 

It wasn’t without its difficulties though, as getting into character meant you had to immerse yourself in its darkness, in the disturbing themes that ate away at you sometimes. It was Yoongi who’d been the one to bring you out to the light every time - sending you flowers while on set, giving you a bath after every filming so you’re not left in your own mind, holding you close whenever you slept, and driving you out during days off. It was hard but it was worth it, as you felt liberated from all the negative emotions once filming wrapped up. 

Yoongi was supportive all throughout - including all the promotions you had to do and the moments of doubt you’d have about your performance. He held your hand during the premiere and took you to the mountains for a weekend to escape it all for a while. Other than the amazing sex you had and the time away from everyone, you both spent those days  wrapped up in each other’s arms, easing back to your normal lives that didn’t include you randomly crying at night or losing sleep from your tiring schedule. 

You’d just wrapped up your promos for the film in Seoul and you’re also waiting for the next project while working on some endorsements and guesting on the side. But after the exhausting couple of months, you deserve a break, and you want nothing more than to focus on Yoongi, knowing he’s the one who’ll be needing your love and support this time. 

Jimin breaks through your thoughts and asks if the car he’d arranged has arrived.

“Not yet, but Yoongi messaged that he’s 5 minutes away,” you respond. “Thanks, by the way. I know you had to arrange all this in such short notice and had to work with Hoseok to push back all my other schedules. I know it was stressful for you, too.”

“And who said I ever minded?” Jimin replies. “I’ve spent enough time with Yoongi to know how much he takes care and supports you, and that also means I know just how much his career means to him. I’m sure you already know but nonchalant and cool he may be, he’s incredibly nervous. I just know having you there is gonna make all the difference.”

“I know,” you smile, feeling emotional at the thought. “I’m just so happy for him. He’s been sending me photos since he got here and I could just see his eyes sparkling. I’m so excited to see him in action.”

“Me, too, at least from here. We’ll be tuning in and I’ll just pretend I know shit about basketball and the NBA,” Jimin laughs. “I guess it’s weird to be cheering for the commentator and not the players but oh well. Just tell him we’re rooting for him; Jin’s gonna host watch parties in his house. We’ll invite Jungkook and Namjoon so there’ll be people who can actually explain to us what’s happening.”

You laugh at Jimin’s rambling. It’s touching to know just how much your friends have come to support Yoongi as well. You’ve to remind yourself that not long ago, they were all wary of him, given the 2 times he let you go. But they’ve seen in the past year and a half exactly what that love you treasure really looks like. You always said it was transformative for both of you in different ways, and they’ve come to witness that, too. 

They’ve seen how tough days for you were always made better whenever Yoongi was around, how negative voices were always drowned out by his gentleness and encouragement, how bouts of insecurities were easily mended by his belief in you. 

That love got you regularly going home to Daegu to see his dad and to be with yours, and to make an effort to heal the wounds with your sisters. 

That love also got Yoongi to be braver, to take chances and to make the most out of every opportunity he could find. It’s that love that supported him throughout the months that he wrote for that online sports magazine, until he became a regular guest at an online sports show. It’s what encouraged him to apply for a sports channel’s basketball analyst position; you remember the smile on his face when he got the job and the first time he appeared on TV to talk about the sport he’s loved for most of his life. It’s your shared love that got him to dream again - maybe coach a professional team in the future, perhaps become a household name in sports media. It doesn’t matter what form, you’d remind him, as long as it was in the world of basketball.

It’s that same love that’s going to hold his hand through the next 2 or so weeks, as Yoongi lives out a dream he didn’t think he’d have. As a 10-year old who’d imagined himself playing for the NBA too many times, he didn’t think that 20 years later, he’d be reporting on it as part of the South Korean media. He thinks it’s just as much a dream as any. This is the sport he loves, and he told you once that he can’t imagine his life without it. 

“Oh, I think that’s him!” You tell Jimin, as you spot the maroon car that Yoongi said he was in. “Thank you again.”

“Just call me for anything, okay?” He says on the other end. “And enjoy Boston!”

You bid him goodbye and rush to the car that stops not far from where you are. Yoongi exits and you hug him immediately, falling into the warmth that you’ve missed this past week. You were at a promotional event in Busan when he left Seoul for the US a few days ago so you didn’t get to say goodbye, but it appeased you that you could spend your break with him here. 

But more than anything, it’s the fact that you get to be part of his new world this time, and nothing makes you happier than being able to see that sparkle in his eyes that made you fall for him that first time all those years ago. There’s that confidence again, that drive. Yoongi is all kinds of beautiful everyday, but seeing him do something he loves has always been special. You’re glad you get to witness that again.

“I missed you, jagi,” he hums in your ear. How was your flight?”

“Good. I got a bit of rest,” you reply. “And I missed you, too.”

Yoongi smiles and gives your luggage to the chauffeur who loads them in the trunk. You both enter the car and sneak in a kiss for the seconds that you’re alone, and he smiles against your lips before turning to you. 

“You seem excited,” he states.

“Of course, baby. It’s the big day tomorrow. Aren’t you?”

“I’m terrified, actually,” he chuckles to mask the nervousness. “But Mr. Chan called earlier to ask how I’m feeling and he’s been so supportive, saying that his sprained ankle must’ve been a blessing in disguise if it meant I get to take his place. I did the reporting the other day during Media Day and he said I did really well, asking the players and coaches really good questions. He said if I sustain this during the entire championship series, I could be well on my way to reporting more big games even in other sports.”

“Baby, that’s huge!” You beam, turning to him to see his shy smile. “You could be reporting on the Olympics, who knows! But the NBA… this is huge for you. The fact that you’re who they thought to replace him is a big deal. It means they really see something in you.”

“I still think it’s a fluke,” he sighs. “If Mr. Chang hadn’t gotten injured, it would’ve been him. It just so happened that the other guys are either on leave or on another assignment and I was… there.”

“Then you just saved their asses! It means you get to show them how good you are, and I know you’re good. I wouldn’t be paying attention to basketball if you weren’t calling it.”

“You’re biased though,” he laughs. 

“Duh. Name one other sports commentator who knows his shit, is incredibly handsome, has such a soothing voice, and looks hot talking about people shooting balls?” You exclaim. “No one! Just you! Baby, you’re saving the industry!” 

Yoongi thinks you’re adorable when you go off like this. He always knew you didn’t actually pay attention to his games before because your eyes were only on him. Whenever you’d both watch on TV, you’re often curled into his arms, remarking that he does that same jumper smoothly or that the players are either boring or too cocky. You understand the sport, though. He knows you’re interested because you get basic terms and ask him questions. Sometimes he thinks you just want to hear him talk or analyze a play; sometimes you just giggle when he’s pulling his hair or yelling over a stupid call or when his team’s losing, but regardless of your level of appreciation for the sport, he knows you love it because he does, and that means more to him than you’ll ever know. 

He gives in though, knowing you feel strongly about his basketball commentary skills. 

“Thank you, jagi. I at least know that if I completely fail at this, you’d still think I’m hot.”

“Baby, I think you’re hot all the time. You could even model or act, you know? The industry will benefit from this pretty face,” you wink.

“Let’s say hypothetically, I do act. What happens if I have an intimate scene with someone? What would you do?” He asks, arching an eyebrow because he can almost predict what you’re gonna say. 

“I will cry,” you pout, causing him to laugh. 

It’s all hypothetical, but he can tell you’ll really be upset even if it’s something he has to live with all the time. It’s something he’s gotten used to, though. He did survive watching your scenes with Pablo where you both cuddled “naked” in bed, although he admits looking away so many times. He also made it through your mini-series where you had multiple sexually tense scenes with your co-star. He admits he likes it when you’re more clingy and affectionate after each filming and episode, and he won’t complain. 

But knowing how affected you’d be if the roles were reversed makes him a little soft. He remembers those summers years ago when you’d eye the girls who’d cheer for him during his games and how you always ran to him after to hold his hand and then kiss him intensely in the bathroom or his car. You would deny the jealous girlfriend allegations and he used to just laugh through it. It seems like nothing has changed.

“These lips are for me only,” you say, cupping his cheeks to hold him in place for a deep kiss.

“They are,” he smiles. “And I know at the end of the day, your lips are only for me, too.”

He kisses you again, no longer minding the chauffeur in the car who doesn’t seem to care that you’re being affectionate in his backseat. 

“They are,” you hum. “They’re for your neck, and your chest, and—” you palm his cock — “for this.”

“Jagi,” he laughs, already used to your antics. 

You’re usually like this after being away. You were apart for a few days and it’s been a while since you’ve been separated for longer than that. 

“I just miss you,” you sigh, hugging him now and liking the comfort of his touch as always. “No one would massage my feet after walking in heels for hours and have a bath with me, no one would make me cum to sleep or kiss me goodnight.”

“Nice to know that’s all you miss,” he teases, earning him another pout.

“You know what I mean.”

“I do, and I miss those, too,” he hums as he kisses your forehead. “Thanks though, for coming here. I know that Jimin and Hoseok had to push back some of your schedules.”

“No issue at all. I wanted to be here, babe. This is a big deal and I’m… I’m just so happy for you,” you say against his chest. 

“You know I wouldn’t have gotten here without you, right?” He replies, emotional now at how far he’s come. 

It’s been years but the memory of his injury and his subsequent fallout from the sport comes and goes sometimes, so was losing you in the process. And then losing you again. But he’s here now, with you, the night before an important moment of his young career as a sports analyst, and he’s never felt more secure in his life. 

“You’ve always been a fighter,” you look up at him. “And you’re here because of you.” You kiss him softly. “But I can also take credit, that’s fine,” you laugh. “But really, thank you for not giving up on your dream, babe. I hope you know that it gives me courage, too.”

That night, you climb into bed with Yoongi, the exhaustion from the long trip overtaking you. There’s warmth in his eyes when he looks at you, and he chuckles when you try to stay awake. It’s his soft lips against your forehead that bids you goodnight, and you fall into his arms, knowing that this is what you’ll be waking up to in the morning.

The next evening, you walk inside TD Garden, Boston’s sports arena, where Game 1 of the NBA finals between the Celtics and Phoenix Suns are being held. The energy is insane, something you’ve never felt before, and it’s making you giddy and excited. You can only imagine what it’s like for Yoongi, and the thought makes your heart warm. 

You did see him taking long breaths earlier after he’d dressed up and prepared to leave, and much as you’d been so tired, you just had to hug him to calm him down and tell him that he’s gonna do great. He’s just excited, he claimed, but he’ll look for you in the arena; knowing you’re there with him will be enough to calm his racing heart. 

He had to go earlier to cover the press conference and film for their segment in Seoul’s morning news channel. It’s just him, Hee-soo, and a small production crew but it’s all they need. As commentators, they get to call the game but also interview the players and staff, report it, and then write about it. It’s tough and stressful but it’s the kind of buzz that Yoongi lives for now, you can tell, as you eye him in his designated analysts’ table, looking around and taking in the energy of the arena. His smile is priceless. There’s pride in it, there’s acceptance. It looks like the smile of someone who fought hard to have a new dream, and someone who worked to achieve it. 

Yoongi’s eyes go to you and you wave. You’re thankful for the connections you have that got you this ticket last minute, and even if you won’t pay attention to the game as much, being here to witness Yoongi call his first NBA match is too special to miss. You can’t imagine being anywhere else.

The game is an exciting one. You get into it with the crowd even if you don’t exactly have a team you’re rooting for but you cheer just the same. Your eyes constantly flit to Yoongi though, whose position isn’t far from where you’re seated. 

You listen through the online channel so you can hear what he’s saying, and the way he describes the energy inside is on-point. He narrates the plays effectively; you could be looking away from the court and still feel like you’re watching because of how good he is. His voice is calm and measured, except towards the end when the game is close and his pitch increases and he matches the excitement of what’s happening. It’s intense and exhilarating, and when the final buzzer sounds, you turn to him and see that smile on his face again. 

Tears form in your eyes as you feel overwhelming pride. Perhaps it’s similar to what he felt when he was with you during the recent Film Festival where your movie was shown and the audience gave your entry a standing ovation. He knew what you had to go through for that role and seeing your hard work paying off meant so much to him, as he got to hold your hand and tell you he was proud of you. 

That was special, he said. So many times in the past, he wanted to tell you all that, and that you did well, and that he’s looking forward to the next big thing you’ll do, but he never had the courage to. That’s why he’d send flowers, he told you. 

He also revealed how that came about - how he’d driven to Seoul for your first movie premiere with a bouquet of daisies but that he’d seen you with someone, and how he decided to leave it at the agency for you to receive. He almost took it back but you seemed to like it so he just continued with the tradition. You cried then, and he said he didn’t want you to feel guilty. But you were emotional because he still looked out for you and his care for you never wavered. The flowers gave you strength, and you’d told him you wanted to be like those daisies for him, too. 

Seeing him now gives you that sense of fulfillment, that not long from now, you’ll be able to hold his hand and tell him you’re proud of him, and the chance to do that for someone you love is special beyond words. You’re glad you can finally do that for each other now. 

Gentle dreams, you think. This life with him and all the simple things you do for each other and together are some of the biggest ones.

It’s quiet in the car on the way to your hotel, the fancier one you booked for both of you instead of the mid-range one they got for him. Yoongi is focused on his notebook, jotting down notes from his memory that he’ll have to write up later on. 

He’s then glued to his device once you get to your room, with him seated on the couch and agreeing to your orders for room service for your dinner. It seems he’s going through the messages of praise from his colleagues and his friends. A lot of people tune in to the channel’s coverage of the NBA, and other than you, no one’s prouder than his dad and his brother. 

You watch him from the bathroom door, appreciating the joy he exudes. It’s different from what you’d seen all those years ago. This is a man who went through various kinds of pain and had other people suffer because of it, something he still burdens himself with every once in a while. But he did the brave thing of dreaming again; sometimes you think that’s probably harder than when he gave up on the first one. 

Yoongi shows you everyday that courage takes different forms. Sometimes it’s letting something go, sometimes it’s fighting for them. Sometimes it’s loving someone from afar and sometimes it’s flying thousands of miles to a foreign country and asking for them back. 

But it’s always picking up your broken pieces and learning to love yourself despite and because of them. It’s finding something or someone you can’t live without and offering what you can, trusting that they’ll take you into their world because you deserve it. Courage is dreaming again, it’s loving again even with the possibility of getting hurt. It’s trusting yourself enough that you’re going to be okay if things don’t go your way. 

You hear him call your name. You realize you’ve been gazing at him for longer than you intended, and so you walk towards him as he looks at you questioningly.

“I was just admiring how happy you look,” you say. “It suits you, and I’m just so thankful I get to see it.”

His face softens and he reaches out his hand, one that he kisses and he doesn’t say anything else. He just looks at you tenderly and your heart races at the sight. 

You bend to capture his lips on yours, your movements gentle yet wanting. But it builds as time passes, until you feel him undoing the knot of your bathrobe, with him sighing in satisfaction when he feels you bare underneath. Your breath hitches when he cups your breast and you want nothing more than to have him right now. 

You pull away then remove your robe, liking the way his eyes roam around your naked form and how he gulps at the position you’re getting into, as you  get on your knees and spread his legs apart. His slacks get off first, and then his briefs. He removes the rest of his clothes as you take him in your mouth, his cock heavy and wanting as it reaches the edge of your throat. 

You take your time, wanting him to feel good after what he’d done tonight, but he’s the one who pulls away, wanting instead to bury himself inside you. It’s what he does, as he directs you on the couch, entering you from behind while his fingers do their magic on all parts of your body. But he lets you both come together, on the bed as he hovers over you, his head no longer buried in your neck, with his eyes looking straight into yours as you both come down from your highs. 

He kisses your lips tenderly as his I love you, and the way he holds you later that night says everything he can’t say. 

Loving you is what he wants to do in his life. Loving you is courage. 

You didn’t realize just how tiring covering the NBA finals would be. Considering their small team, Yoongi and Hee-soo work double time to get all the information they need to cover the games and write about them within a short period of time. They also have to fly back and forth depending on where the game is and you’ve liked tagging along, enjoying the amenities of your hotel and exploring the nearby area. It’s what you do in Boston and then in Phoenix. 

And while a game 7 is great for the league and basketball fans, you can tell it’s taxing for Yoongi. He doesn’t complain though. It’s part of the experience; the first one tends to be very memorable, he says. 

Both of you find yourselves in Boston's public garden the afternoon after the final game of the series. It’s been a crazy 24 hours, as Yoongi and Hee-soo had to do interviews and then report and then write about the game. You stayed by Yoongi’s side, attending to his needs and helping whenever you can. 

It’s early morning in Korea by now and work can resume later, perhaps right before or during your early morning flight back home, but you’re both at what has become one of your favorite spots in the city. It’s nice and simple and quiet. The garden is also accessible. It reminds you of the park in Paris, the one where Yoongi had come to meet you, and you cried in his arms at the sight of the man you didn’t think you’d be able to be with again, but he braved through his fears to be with you. 

“I like it here,” you say, as you walk past one of the many statues. 

“It’s nice, isn’t it?” He hums. “The pond reminds me of Paris.”

You turn to him and smile, letting him know you were thinking the same. 

Yoongi watches you lovingly look at the flowers. Your head turns when you hear toddlers squealing on their parents’ shoulders. And you perk up at the dog that stops to sniff his leg. They’re all simple but they’re so unabashedly you - soft, charming, and everything he needs. 

He thinks about all the things he loves about you as you smile and laugh at your surroundings. He’s been thinking about a lot of things, actually, constantly pinching his arm to remind himself that this life he’s created with you isn’t just some dream he conjured in his mind to get over losing you twice. You’re actually, truly next to him, living his new dream with him, as he dreams your dream with you. He doesn’t think he can get any happier than everyday he gets to live like this. 

You told him a few times that he’s brave for dreaming a new dream. It’s scary to do that, you’d said, so are other things, like loving again and again, accepting the broken pieces of himself and loving every one of them. You’d said that he was brave for flying to see you and asking for you back, and while he agrees to some extent, he doesn’t think anyone can be braver than you. 

You love intensely and genuinely; you love so certainly. You love like you heal, and you love yourself and others so you could heal as well. The way you loved him all these years has been filled with courage - you loved when it hurt, when it didn’t feel like he wanted to fight for you, when it felt like your love wasn’t strong enough to carry his burden. You loved so hard that there would be nothing to regret if the world ended the next day, and your love is so transformative that it created a home in his aching heart so that it could be strong enough to love both you and him after everything. 

You turn to him and reach out for your hand as you head towards the exit, and he jogs to where you are and intertwines his fingers with yours - not loosely but securely; he wants you to know he’s never letting you go.

There’s no version of life that he’d let you go another time. And so when he gets a message from the jeweler that his order for a customized daisy ring is ready, Yoongi’s heart soars to know that he could at least give you - ask you - something that will let you know that he’ll choose this life over and over again as long as it’s the one where he gets to live the rest of it next to you. 

You’ll both go back to Seoul, in the home you both created, in each other’s arms where you both belong. 

Series Masterlist

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[life-winners-liveblog]

Maybe "loser baby" for the karaoky?

9.2

Martyn: Never heard of it.

Scott: Me neither...weird.

Martyn: We could check the lyrics?

Scott: You're right! Let's see! *Reads* Oh...ohhhhh.

Martyn: Let me look... I see...Grian would have an aunerysm, he says fuck like once every blue moon and Jimmy would probably scream "PG" or something.

Scott: I mean...they aren't here.

Martyn: So you are fine with this song?

Scott: Yeah... yeah!

Martyn: Good.

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Martyn: 🎵So things look bad and your back's against the wall, your whole existance feels fucking hopeless. You're feeling filthy as a dive bar bathroom stall, can't face the world sober and dopeless. 🎵

Scott: Oh you are good at deep tones!

Martyn: 🎶You've lost your way, you think your life is wrecked, well let's me just say you're ...correct!🎶

Scott: Interesting song choice btw whispers.

Martyn: 🎶You're loser, baby, a loser, goddamn baby, you're a fucked up little whiny bitch, you're a loser just like me!🎵

Scott: Funny considering we are both winners.

Martyn: 🎵You're a screw loose boozer, an only one star reviews-er. You're a power bottom at rock bottom but you've got company.🎶

Scott: I'm more of a switch really but sure.

*Martyn looks Scott dead in the eyes and raises an eyebrow at the joke as to say "Really Scott?"*

Martyn: 🎵There was a time I tought that no one could relate to the gruesome ways in which I'm damaged, but letting walls down it can sometimes be ok! We're both living in the same shit sandwich.🎵

Scott: 🎶I sold my soul to a psycopatic freak🎶

Martyn: 🎶And you think that makes you unique? We're both losers, baby, we're losers It's ok to be a-🎵

Scott: 🎵Coked up dick sucking hoe?🎶

Martyn: 🎵Baby thats fine by me.🎵

Scott: 🎶I'm a loser, honey~, a schmoozer and a dummy~ but at least I know I'm not alone.🎶

Martyn: 🎶You're a loser just like me!🎵

Scott: We're great at this, the others would be jealous.

Martyn: 🎶I've got an apetite for gambling.🎵

Scott: 🎵I've got an apetite for samplin' every drug and sex toy I can find.🎶

Martyn: 🎵Go ahead baby sing that song.🎵

Scott: 🎶I got no holes left to deflower🎶

Martyn: 🎵I sold my soul to save my power, now I'm on that demons leash-🎶

Martyn/Scott: I'm trapped and it gets worse with every hour!

Scott: 🎶You're a loser baby.🎶 *Offers a hand to dance*

Martyn: *accepts after a bit of confusion*🎵A loser, but just maybe if we-🎵

Martyn/Scott: Eat shit together things will end up differently.

Martyn: 🎶It's time to loose your self loathing excuse yourself, let hope in baby, play your card be who you are:-🎵

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????: 🎶A loser just like me!🎵 Ah chills! That was great wasn't it-... ...wait.

[big-barn-bed]

Top 5 Paul boyfriends

omg marry me

(these are in no particular order)

-Robert Fraser aka Groovy Bob aka Paul’s emotional support art dealer/drug dealer/fag :’) Most interesting man of the swinging London era! There’s something so special and soft about how Paul always talks about Robert. “I expect people to die so I don't feel a loss but there's a vacuum where he used to be.” And in a letter sent from Paul to Robert when Robert was in prison from The Rolling Stones drug bust, “Jane sends her love, love, and is baking a file cake. I send mine.” aughhh <\3

-Tara Browne… I wish there was more written about him! We know he was very important to Paul. He was the person Paul first took acid with and was with Paul in the Great Liverpool Moped Accident of ‘65! I always wondered why Paul invited him to Liverpool for his family holiday asdkskj. Paul describes him as “a nice Irish guy, very sensitive bloke. I’d see him from time to time, and enjoyed being around him.” which is basically a declaration of passionate love in paul-speak.

-Peter Asher! Underrated Paul boyfriend. I’m not saying Paul only stayed with Jane as long as he did because he had a whole thing for her family… but I’m not NOT saying that. The songs he gave him! The wrapping paper he designed and kept secret as a gift to Peter and the Indica gallery!

(I’ll also just mention Paul’s never ending kink for high society types. He loved hearing Robert talk about his time at Eton, specifically the ‘fagging system’. Tara was heir to the Guinness fortune, not to mention son of a member of the House of Lords. The whole Asher family was a wet dream come true.)

-Denny Laine (is in my ears and in my eyes..🎶) listen. LISTEN. Look at any picture of Paul, Linda, and Denny in the wings era and tell me they weren’t a god’s honest throuple. You can’t. I know it in my life’s blood they got it on down and dirty for YEARS. Linda especially is allll over him in so many pictures and I don’t blame her! He’s a cutie! But they all had fuck-nasty sex.

-John Lennon. Yes, the world’s greatest and most tragic love story etc etc. fanfic tropes galore! Meet cute, mutual pining, only one bed, father doesn’t approve, found family, let’s run away together etc etc

Me: so anyway John had mommy issues and Paul had daddy issues. And John was sort of daddy and Paul was sort of mommy but they just weren’t enough for each other. They were somehow the most and least compatible people on the planet but the love was there and it changed everything.

My mom: 👁️👄👁️

[kanmom51]

Hi. Recently discovered your blog.I am having fun reading it.. You nice keep going 💜

I was just listening to Letter and thinking how fast we moved on from it.

The ending lines from the song literally broke my heart into pieces

🎶because we don't know what days await us,

though it's scary , though we're afraid Never forget that we are together🎶

the way these lines always makes me wanna cry . They are literally sharing with us that they are afraid of what comes ahead in future for them as a couple. The kind of society they are living in. We sometimes tend to forget the kind of fear Jimin and Jungkook must be living with. It must be so hard on them it breaks my heart.

But I know they both are strong and together they are stronger and i want them to know that we jikookers will be there to support them and we all together will be the strongest.

also Jimin wrote this song for Jungkook and no one can change my mind. When Jimin wrote this song Jungkook was on his mind, when Jimin released it as a hidden track Jungkook was on his mind and while Jimin was saying this is a fan song.. Mr.Jungkook was on his mind.

Letter for me stands right next to GCF at Tokyo.

Letter. Omg, I love that song. Can I just sit there and listen to it on repeat? Although not a very good idea, cause I just wouldn't stop crying.

Those lines at the end, JK joining in, confirming their together, so so beautiful and emotional, and definitely not for Army.

It's not only their own society they fear @youaremyparkfilter.

They know the fandom. They know the good, the bad and the extremely ugly of it. They know that coming out as queer individually will be a big issue for many fans, even more so for JK's stans (it is what it is).

But coming out as a queer couple, that will be a massive earthquake in the fandom. And again, nothing to do with how it will be accepted or rejected in Korea.

In Korea both JM and JK are loved, adored (yes there are haters, but there always are, you just cannot be loved by everyone). People that lifted them to where they are, Princes of Busan, the black and white couple, the sun and moon couple, people that see them as a representation of SK in the world and say it out loud, how loved they are, how proud they are of them.

In saying that, I think that a big lump of those don't actually see them as a queer couple, they just can't envision it, as queer is such an alien notion to them. Even with all their shenanigans. That's the whole glass closet and stretching boundaries within their reality as Kpop idols. Many people, in Korea and out, even if they acknowledge their closeness, do not or will not see beyond it into maybe, just maybe, them being a queer couple.

If they ever do 'come out', there will be those in Korea that do flip flop on them (and I'm not talking about the ones that throw hate at them already), although I personally think not as many as feared. They have been loved for such a long time, it will be harder to turn around and suddenly hate on them (although sometimes the line between love and hate is very thin). Not to mention how hard it will be for people, officials as well, to flip back on calling them the face of Korea, pride of Korea etc.

Make no mistake though, there will be a lot of hate (and it will be very loud, as we all know very well), and their families would receive a big chunk of it (easier/softer targets because of who and what JM and JK and BTS represent).

I think many would take pause, they would perhaps be initially shocked (some not so much, more like a eureka moment for them, like "oh, that explains everything..."), but at the end of the day the blow to their careers won't be the level of Holland's. Because of who they are, because of others that are paving the way (including Holland), because let's be honest here, they are artists and want to continue creating and performing and succeeding, but even if they take a hit their fandom is so friggin huge that whatever happens they will continue to succeed, and I do believe they will gain fans too because of that brave move, because of people realizing just how much their art is representative of themselves. Not to mention the level of impact it will have in Korea for recognition and acceptance of the LGBTQ+ community. In a society like Korea you have the very loud anti LGBTQ+ religious groups, you have those with the old fashioned backwards way of thinking, you have those that don't think or care either way (as long as it doesn't concern them) and you have those that are part of the LGBTQ+ community or support it and their fight for equal rights and protection by law. On that spectrum I believe you will find that a big piece of society can be swayed. And people like that who will see these two young men who they have grown to love come out as queer, they can have a change of mind, a moment of enlightenment/ realization that perhaps love is love is love. Maybe that's me being over optimistic, but I really don't think so. Because that's how change is made. That is how change was made in the West.

But, there will always be a price, and all of this is purely speculation (no way of me knowing just how bad it could get for them). It's their lives, their safety, their careers on the line and they are the ones that are living this reality and having to hide who they are and who they love at the moment, and will be living this conundrum on a daily basis.

So to sum it up, I believe there will be a hit but not a crushing one to their careers if they ever do decide to take that step. I'm not expecting it of them though. I know it will be a huge step forward for the LGBTQ+ community in SK if they do, but it's their lives, their careers, their loved ones, their decision.

It's a bloody scary thing to do, and it impacts not only them but also their families, their loved ones, their bandmates. This is a decision they will have to make together, and they will most likely make some sort of decision post MS. One way or another, I think things will change post MS. Contracts will change too. Just how much it will change, that is the million dollar question.

God, did I digress....

After saying all of that, I do want to back pedal a bit to your ask and to those specific lines in Letter.

I think they engulf not only the fear of being a queer couple in an unfriendly society, but also the upcoming uncertain future of military service, being apart for such a long time after being together for what seems like forever, not being able to be there for each other in this oh so scary new reality of military service that is looming over them. The uncertainty of this time to come and what lies ahead. All of that is engulfed into those lines of the song.

Anyway, the song is beautiful.

The song is a love song. And we aren't the recipients of said letter, said love song.

Letter is a song for JK disguised as a song for army.

Letter is addressed to JK, for army to hear.