#it'll just.. take me a while.. orz

[kiksniko]

if you're still taking requests, perhaps nikolai? 🥺👉👈 (and if not that's understandable and i hope you're having a nice day 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤)

the silliest of guys !

[libraryofgage]

A Hop, a Skip, and a TARDIS Jump

Part of: Steve Deserves Good Parents, Actually Debbie and Fester Addams One | Two Rick and Evelyn O'Connell One | Two (on the way!) Harley Quinn One 10th Doctor and Rose One (you're here!) Scooby Gang (there are plans for this one lmao, so plz be patient with me orz)

I know it says 10Rose up there, but this series starts with 9Rose, because 9 is also special blorbo in my heart hfjdks Christopher Eccleston didn't have to put his whole chest into the role but he did and I love that for him

Anyway, have fun with this one! We're getting time travel shenanigans coming up (and angst, def some angst, but it'll end sweet I promise), and a little meme at the end

As always, if you see any typos, no you didn't :)

Satellite Five 200,000

Running into the woman was an accident created by the chaos of something changing on Satellite Five. Steve doesn't know what that is, exactly, but he can feel it in the air, in the way the humans around him have started rushing, in how the food stands have suddenly ground to a halt. And he comes to a halt with them, his hearts speeding up in his chest as the frenzy reminds him of another time, another planet, another chaotic scene that ended with him being launched across time and space while his home died.

When he finally gathers his wits enough to move, he turns right into a woman's leg, bumping his nose hard against her and falling to the ground with a startled cry. He holds his nose, the bridge smarting and causing his eyes to water as he looks up at a pretty young blonde woman who immediately crouches in front of him.

"Sorry about that. You all right?" she asks, her hands hovering in the air like she wants to check him for injuries but doesn't want to make him uncomfortable.

The funny thing is, Steve has seen this woman before. He saw her earlier in the day, getting into the elevator with a journalist and a man, and he assumed he'd never see her again. Nobody who got in the elevator came back. He's so overwhelmed by the shock of seeing her again that he almost misses the familiar aura around her, the lingering traces of golden space dust and passing time.

Almost.

He stares at her with wide eyes, his tears actually falling now, and then throws himself into her arms. "What took so long?!" he cries, clinging to her shirt like he'll be thrown across time and space one more time if he lets go.

"Woah, hey now, no need for crying," she says, utterly confused but gently smoothing down his hair anyway. "What's wrong?"

After taking a few moments to calm down, Steve starts to answer when he realizes something. The woman only has one heart. He can only hear one set of beats in her chest. He jerks away, his hands trembling as he stares at her. She's still covered in that familiar aura, practically swimming in it, but she's not like him.

It hurts. Steve can feel the bitter cold of disappointment replacing the hope that had started to grow between his hearts. He thought...he thought he'd get to be with someone like him again. Maybe not his original family---they're dead, long gone, and Steve is never getting them back---but a new one that wouldn't let him feel quite so alone anymore.

Maybe she was just injured. That would explain it well enough.

"Where....where's your second heart?" he asks, his voice small as he grips the hem of his shirt to steady himself. "Y-you...why do you--"

Before Steve can get the rest of the question, a man in a leather jacket, looking slightly annoyed as he checks his pockets, appears next to the woman. "Right then. C'mon, Rose, we got dead weight to drop off," he says, his tone hard.

The woman, Rose, looks up at him. "Hold on a minute, Doctor," she says, "we've got to help him find his parents first."

Steve opens his mouth, wanting to say that won't be possible, as he looks up at the man. Their eyes meet, and the words get stuck in his throat. If Rose carried lingering space dust and passing time, this man is made of it. Steve can see the gold around him, swirling and calling, singing in a way he'd forgotten about. Even the name is familiar---not that Steve knows this particular Time Lord, of course, but he knows the conventions and traditions.

"I'm afraid that'll be impossible, Rose," the Doctor says, his voice softer and full of disbelief as he crouches next to her on the ground.

"What? How do you know?"

The Doctor doesn't answer her. He just holds a hand out to Steve, waiting patiently. When Steve takes it, the world finally rights itself. He can feel the blood pumping through the Doctor's veins, fast and powerful in a way only two hearts can manage. He can practically taste time and space coating his tongue as he steps closer. When Steve places his hand on the left side of the man's chest, feeling the beating of one heart before sliding his hand over to feel the other, he cries even harder than before.

And the Doctor cries, too.

It's not a loud crying, but he pulls Steve into his arms and holds him with the same desperation and fear that he'll disappear if he loosens his grip that Steve felt when he hugged Rose. "I thought...I thought I was the only one left," the Doctor says, moving his hand to cradle the back of Steve's head.

"Doctor, what's going on here?" Rose asks.

Steve peeks out at her, and then he's lifted into the air, still held in the Doctor's arms. His jacket smells like the past and future, a soothing scent that gets Steve to relax like he hasn't in a long time. "Long story short," the Doctor says, his voice still rough from crying but recovering, "you somehow bumped into the only Time Lord child in existence." A few moments pass before he speaks again, the smile and awe clear in his voice as he says, "You're just fantastic, Rose. Fantastic."

Despite his best efforts, Steve can't keep his eyes open long enough to see how she reacts or what the Doctor does next. The exhaustion of fending for himself and pushing away the despair of losing everything sweeps over him. This could all be a dream, and the Doctor might be a figment of his imagination that disappears when he wakes up, but Steve lets himself dream for now.

--------

Hawkins, Indiana, 1971

"Okay, Steve, go ahead."

Steve glances up at his father, shifts his gaze to his mother, and then approaches the console. He reaches up and starts turning a dial, ignoring his mother's excited noise and his father's interested hum. Once he's turned it enough, he walks around the console and pulls a lever, flips a switch, and yanks another dial two notches to the right. Then, when he's sure his parents can't hear him, he leans in close and whispers, "Take me wherever you'd like me to be, TARDIS."

He feels something warm and happy surge under his fingers where he's holding the console. Not a second later, the familiar whooshing sound of the TARDIS fills the room, and Steve hang on for dear life as his father shouts, "Fantastic! Where do you think we'll land, Rose?"

"Somewhere child-friendly, hopefully," his mother replies, grabbing his father's arm and holding on for dear life.

Steve grins, his hearts beating fast and hard behind his ribs as the TARDIS slowly comes to a stop, its engine quieting to a gentle whirring as it parks. "Go on then," his father says, appearing behind Steve and nudging him to the doors. "See where you've brought us."

With his breath stuck in his throat, Steve slowly pulls the left door open. Sunlight streams into the TARDIS along with the delighted shrieks of other children and a warm wind that can only mean summer. Steve blinks, staring at the playground a few feet away.

"Oh," his father says, his tone duller than before, "seems boring."

This statement is followed by both the TARDIS making an offended noise and Steve's mother smacking his father in the chest. "Don't be rude! Boring is safe, which is good for Steve's first drive."

"Can...can I go play?" Steve asks, his voice soft as he feels a sudden longing sweeping through him. He hasn't played with people his age after leaving Gallifrey. In fact, he hasn't been around them. On Satellite Five, Steve didn't see other children. They were cared for on a different floor, and he never risked getting into the elevator.

Since leaving Satellite Five (since finding another Time Lord and basking in the TARDIS and crying together when Steve accidentally called the Doctor "Dad" and Rose "Mom"), Steve has been surrounded by Daleks and nanogenes and older humans and every alien under the sun, but he's never been around children.

The thought is exhilarating and terrifying and alluring all at once.

"Of course, Steve," his mother says, placing her hand on his head and brushing a few stray hairs from his face. "You go play, and we'll call you back in a few hours for some ice cream, yeah?"

Steve grins and nods eagerly, throwing a quick goodbye to his parents before running out of the TARDIS. He dashes across the street, coming to the edge of the playground before stopping. The grass turns into tiny rocks and pebbles beneath slides and swings and monkey bars and a merry-go-round. And kids. More kids than Steve really knows what to do with, which gives him an unfamiliar feeling of anxiety that makes him wipe his palms on his shirt.

"Hey, why are you just standing there?"

The question is asked by another boy Steve's age. His hair is a little frizzy and curls around his ears, and he's got band-aids covering his arms and stretching across the bridge of his nose. He's standing to Steve's left, holding a red rubber ball and ignoring the other kids around them.

"I've...never been here before," Steve says, meaning that he's never been in this situation.

The boy doesn't understand that, though. But when he says, "Oh, so you're new around here," Steve doesn't disagree. "Well, nice to meetcha. I'm Eddie."

He shifts to hold the ball against his chest with one arm and holds out his other hand. Taking it and shaking once, Steve introduces himself and asks, "Can we be friends?"

Eddie's eyes brighten, and he nods. "Yeah! Let's be bestest friends. Can I call you Stevie? Mom says you can give nicknames to friends."

"Sure! So, uh, what do we do now?"

Eddie pauses, looking at the playground with a slight frown. "We could play games," he says slowly.

"Oh! How about Weeping Angel?"

"What's that?"

Steve thinks for a moment. "Weeping Angels are these statues that move when you don't look at them. In the game, someone will face away, and the other person will start sneaking up on them. If the first person turns, the second has to freeze in place. If the first person sees them move, they lose. If the second person reaches the first and touches them, they win."

"It sounds like Rad Light, Green Light," Eddie says, tilting his head slightly. "But, sure! Let's play it."

Steve smiles brightly and follows Eddie to a clear patch of playground. "I'll be the Angel in this round," he offers, waiting for Eddie to agree before walking a few feet away. "Let me know when you're ready!"

Eddie turns around, still holding the rubber ball, and glances over his shoulder. He stares at Steve for a few seconds before looking away and saying, "Ready!"

As lightly as he can, Steve takes a few steps forward, doing his best to make no sounds like the Weeping Angels he's seen before. When he notices Eddie moving, he freezes, quickly placing his hands over his eyes but leaving enough room to peek between his fingers.

When Eddie turns, he's frozen in a classic Weeping Angel pose. Eddie studies him for a few seconds, eyes narrowed before slowly turning around again. Steve exhales softly, and the game continues.

Steve wins exactly three times, Eddie wins twice, and there's one round in which they both dissolve into laughter because of the position Steve freezes in, so they don't count it. When Eddie gets bored of playing, he introduces Steve to foursquare, which is why he has the rubber ball. When he gets bored of that he drags Steve around the playground, introducing him to each piece of equipment with pride.

By the time the sun has started to dip low on the horizon, Steve is sweaty and dirty and happier than he's ever felt as he hides under the slide with Eddie. They're pressed close together, sharing a popsicle Eddie's mother had given them, purple juice making their hands sticky.

"You're really cool, Stevie," Eddie suddenly says, his lips and tongue purple as he offers the last bit of popsicle to Steve.

After taking it and letting the cold ice melt on his tongue, Steve asks, "Hey, do bestest friends keep secrets that only they know?"

"Of course! Nothing is stronger than a bestest friend secret."

"But you gotta promise not to tell anyone. Not even your mom."

Eddie seems to realize this is serious now, and he straightens up a bit. "I won't," he promises, "cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye."

That seems a bit extreme to Steve, but what does he know of human customs? He leans in close, his mouth almost pressing against Eddie's ear, and whispers, "I'm an alien."

He pulls away in time to see Eddie's disbelieving look. "What? You look human. No way you're an alien."

"I am!" Steve says. "How many hearts have you got?"

"One. Duh."

"I've got two."

Eddie snorts. "Yeah. Right. Nobody has two hearts."

"Here, you can feel them," Steve says before grabbing Eddie's hand and placing it over the left side of his chest. He waits a few seconds, making sure Eddie can feel that heart, before sliding his hand to the right side. He watches Eddie's face turn bright red, and Steve figures it's from excitement or shock at realizing Steve is, in fact, an alien.

Before Eddie can say anything, Steve hears his mother calling, "Steve! It's time to go!"

He pouts, letting go of Eddie's hand. "Aw, man," he mumbles, crawling out from beneath the slide. Eddie scrambles after him, his cheeks still flushed and his eyes wide. "I gotta go now, but I'll see you again soon, Eddie."

"Yeah, soon," Eddie mumbles, seeming dazed until he shakes his head. "Your, um, secret is safe with me, Stevie."

Steve blinks and flashes a blinding smile. "Of course it is," he says, "You're my bestest friend."

With that, he hugs Eddie and then runs to his mother, brimming with excitement at getting to tell her all about the park and Eddie.

------

If you'd like to be tagged for this series, let me know!

And, finally, a meme for your viewing pleasure:

[merakiui]

IM THINKING ABOUT TRIPLET SCARAMOUCHE AGAIN!! I've had this thought forever... what if one day you get sick of scara's bullying so you decide to play his game against him. you corner him in the hallway, lean in really close and whisper something with a smile like, "you want to fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid." OHHH!!! AND especially if you run away afterwards to wanderer and jokingly hide behind him, asking him to save you from scary scara. while we're on this note, would pitting them against each other work in any capacity? or would they both turn on reader?

GENTLY HOLDS THIS ASK..... I have been wanting to discuss more triplet Scaramouche ever since I posted it. OTL thank you, anon, for sharing your wonderful idea. >0<

If you corner Scaramouche and essentially kabedon him, he just falls for you all over again. The whispering, too!! You're such a tease; he hates (loves you to the moon and back) you so much! He's scoffing and blushing and sputtering and glaring; he's such a mess of all sorts of feelings. In the end, he goes back to his default of being a little hater and swallows down the embarrassment in favor of swatting at you and acting so harsh and defensive and ready to fight you in that hallway. He's so mean about it, and he keeps insisting that, no, he is not stupid and he'd rather suffer the most terrible agony than ever entertain thoughts of sleeping with you (he's lying). Aaa he's so incredibly huffy!!

It's made worse when you hide behind Wanderer, who is more than happy to join in on the teasing. He's probably the one with the most rizz out of the three of them, playfully nudging you and saying you can fuck him instead. He'll always be here to save you from scary (inexperienced) Scara. >:) and that just makes Scara even more envious because if anyone's going to fuck you it'll be him, not his loser brother! He switches his opinion so fast whenever Wanderer is involved because before he acted like he was so much better than everyone and that someone as great as him would never sleep with a lowly brat like you. But now that Wanderer wants you, Scara wants you as well. It's like that thing where if one person has something special another person will want it, too. orz

I like to think it might work for Scara and Wanderer because they're prone to bickering on occasion. Kabukimono doesn't usually take sides and it's often difficult to make him angry. He's the most sweet, peaceful one amongst the three of them. Although I think Scara and Wanderer are quick to compromise and turn on you. Maybe they make you think you've driven a wedge between them or have succeeded in pitting them against each other, only to pull the rug out from under you with a harsh surprise. >:) when it comes to being devious and keeping you for themselves, they can always find ways to work together.

[yume-x-hanabi]

So, bit of a life update because it's been... almost two months? since I last properly logged here (I had some stuff in the queue, but I think it ran out after a while, woops). Getting a bit personal, so the rest is under cut.

Honestly the main reasons are simply, I'm busy, and exhausted. Not a good combination lol

I haven't had proper relaxing time for me since at least a year and a half. Summer holidays are supposed to be the time when I can finally relax responsibility-free for a month and a half to get over usually hectic second semesters. Except last July my grandma had a fall, and while she's fine, long story short she's now in a nursing home and we spent the whole summer and lots of free time during the following months clearing her house (which was. a mess).

On top of that I'd bought an apartment (yay) in a building that's still under construction, and while that's great because it means I could customize it the way I want, it also meant spending a lot of time going here and there to choose floorings, furniture, and lots appointments (bank, notary...) etc etc. And now that it's in the final stage we're running into issues because the notaries aren't agreeing about some conditions, so the deed signing date recently had to be postponed, which'll leave me very little time to schedule the actual move (I have to be out of my current place by the end of the month). Super stressful. And also busy--spent nearly two days last week playing telephone game with the developer, the notary's office, the bank... and we still haven't solved the issue as of now orz

On top of that, this past school year has been super intense, I took on more admin responsibilities, which, while fun, consume a lot of time and focus, which put me behind on my regular class prep and grading, which just generally added to the mental load. Also I had to take lessons on Saturday mornings for my teaching certificate, which is also something that ate into my time and energy this year.

This all kinda came crashing down on me in early June when I just... kinda shut down for about two weeks. I had 4 super important tasks/projects to do, and for those two weeks I made progress on none of them. I just kinda froze, not knowing where to start, and my focus was allllll over the place, could not keep it on one thing for the life of me (there may or may not be suspicion of adhd at play, I'll have to look into it more and see someone about it, but... no time atm orz)

I managed to pull through in the end (well, one of the things is postponed to August so I have more time to do it thankfully), but I'm completely mentally exhausted. So yeah, I kinda gave up checking tumblr for a while, bc I just didn't have the mental capacity for that.

In happier news Missy is still as silly as ever, my niece is the cutest, I got a baby blahaj yesterday to go with my big one, Dreamcatcher's new mini-album is wonderful, and once everything is solved and I can move in it'll be awesome to live in my own place. Also I went to TwoSetViolin's world tour show in Berlin last week-end and it was awesome :D (might make a separate post about it later)

And now I need to start packing. Gonna be a busy month again 😅

[afniel]

Ah whoops it's after 5am again and I'm still not asleep. I was drawing. orz

Totally unrelated and uncommonly woo-woo (now, anyway, I used to blog about this shit all the time) thought but it's a little weird that any time I'm dreaming that I'm killing a shitload of people, which is actually not that frequent at all, my friend Fox (who is a dream walker and a real human being that exists in the world, we went to university together) always shows up and is like, 'so how's that going for you,' and I'm like, 'oh you know ;3' and the next day I'm like, 'uh oh, what did you see.' and she's like, 'enough.'

She has got to have the most skewed idea of what kind of dreamer I am. I swear I'm mostly boring. I am not always rabidly racking up a double digit body count like aliveness is going out of style but only for other people. In fact that's like 2-3 times a year at the absolute most. AND YET. The instant I start thinking in my sleep, 'hmm! Perhaps just a bit of murdering and maiming and harming and aggressing and destroying and thrashing and killing and vandalizing would be fine. I can have little a homicides, as a treat' she rolls in like, 'am I interrupting something or' and I'm like 'uhhh nope! just the usual! how you doing!' while hiding the dream bodies.

She's literally collabed with Hermes once to rope me into doing it astrally because I guess they needed to teach someone a lesson and later I was basically like, 'you know you can ask right. You don't have to sneakily point me at targets while I'm asleep. Using your words is a real thing you can do,' but I don't think it'll happen, I think if I were awake I'd ask normal questions like, 'do you really need 50+ people from this fae court slaughtered, is that not excessive, have you tried taking to them, I'm not really about violence, perhaps let's not do this' but if you drag me over to the other side when I'm asleep, I just go, 'the vibes are rancid so I'm letting your blood out now.' Which is probably easier from their side of things, because they've made up their minds already, but man. Way to make me feel very normal and reasonable about it.

[blockgamepirate]

Everyone is the main character of their own pov, I feel like that what makes roleplay via streaming so interesting. For example, in a TV show, you only get to see parts of the characters life that are relevant to the scenes they’re in, but with this format, you see everything from important moments to random, mundane, slices of their lives.

And then all these personal stories come together to form an ensemble story (the general lore of the server could be seen as such).

Sometimes of course some cubitos have a more prevalent role in whats going on but they’re more main characters of an arc than of the whole thing. Even cubitos who don’t engage much with lore are still main characters, they’re just not main characters of the weird horrorish plot everyone is a part of, but of their own slice of life, sitcom, romcom, family drama, adventure, whatever story.

This mixing of genres and multiplicity of povs is one of the things I love the most about QSMP (I assume every twitch rp is the same but I don’t watch it). It’s like you’re watching a TV show except every episode is written by a different writer. More accurately it’s kinda like watching people in the streets from your window and wondering what kind of life they live, how they connect etc except here you actually get to watch it all.

Eyyy thanks for the ask! Sorry for the (probably?) late response, I completely missed it somehow orz

I'm excited to get thorough responses though, that's the ideal :D

And yeah I fully agree actually, I think this is one of the reasons why this medium is so captivating for me

Not to spoil too much but the reason for the polls was actually because I saw like two videos on YouTube within a week that were reminiscing about DSMP and both of them just unquestioningly called Tommy the main character of the story and I got into thinking about how I've never heard anyone seriously say one streamer's character is the main character of an SMP, or any roleplay thing, other than DSMP, while with DSMP you hear that take ALL the time

But then I thought that actually I should probably verify that because maybe I just think that no other SMPs have this, maybe I'm just not hearing it, and that's when I was like hey wait I can make polls and do a comparison

(I mean I'm pretty sure the polls are gonna be skewed anyway, because that's how Tumblr works, but it'll be fun anyway, and I've already gotten interesting responses in the notes)

[creativenicocorner]

Hiiiiii is Act II up or was it Act III that had to be updated? Its been a hot minute 😩

AAAH renee!! Tumblr didn't notify me that I got an ask ;0; I'm not even sure how long ago you sent this, but regardless thank you for your patience!! And so true, it really has been a hot minute

I, well, (;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`) I'm still 3 chapters away from finally finishing ACT I there's still no update. In fact there hasn't been much of an update since [checks notes] 02 Nov 2021 orz ... sweet christ.

BUT I'm always grateful and appreciative of everyone's patience as I wander about working on other WIPs, and regaining my energy ♡

I still have so many plans for Terpsichore, despite of its current deep hibernation, there are plot points and encounters that I can't wait to blow people's tits off with (hopefully, if I play my cards right haha) its a fic that is so deep within me it'll eventually be told in full no matter what, it just might...take a while lol

In the meantime while it has been on the back burner I even considered new and different ways to tackle ACT II and how to approach going about posting it. I might not make it a monster long fic like I did for ACT I, and in fact break it down to more manageable sizes, but also perhaps more organized.

I'm in the process of trying to write a fic with an actual posting schedule (though it isn't ToA related), and seeing how that turns out and how I feel about that I might consider doing the same for ACT II (the downside would probably be that folks would have to wait Even Longer lol )

I'm happy to say that playing in WIPS for other fandoms and trying out different styles has really helped when it comes to my self imposed nervousness for ACT I. Which was such a me thing to have happen lol through no fault of anyone's but my own, I had been working on that fic for so long and the fact it was coming to an end and wanting that ending to be Perfect™ really intimidated me, (granted the absolute disillusionment due to the last season and the movie didn't help matters either, It DID help create Unbecoming 2 Electric Boogaloo which I love with my whole heart and will be happy to return to and finish one day)

But these days, after working on and currently writing on other projects that need for The Perfect Chapter End, and intimidation, have dwindled less and less!!

I do still miss writing about the Disaster Muppets, I thought of Walter non-stop while listening to Jorge Rivera-Herrans's Epic the Musical (but thats because I have always layered Walter over with my love of Odysseus, I'm a fucking sucker for tricksters yo, this is known)

So yeah the changeling brain worms are still in my noggin, hibernating and waiting for the return of its own springtime

And when that does happen and I do come back, it'll be stronger than ever (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧♡

Thank you so much again for reaching out and your support! It is much appreciated ♡

Best wishes!!♡

[gachaparadise]

i thought ZZZ was launching tomorrow night so. i absolutely did not put aside enough time to play it tonight orz... i started but i haven't gotten nearly far enough to actually review anything. despite that i persist. heres my thoughts for the first 3ish hours lol.

i find the combat. interesting. i think it has the potential to be really fun but i haven't really gotten to sink my teeth into it yet. not only because of time constraints but. the button layout is fucking with my muscle memory from like three different games and i cannot get it right to save my life. attack being x instead of b and dodge being y instead of rb is actually killing me. at least the ultimate button is where it should be so i'm not spamming it randomly.

i've done like. 3 cut scenes so i cannot speak to the overarching story much. i like the comedic vibe so far though. the opening scene with the reporter was pretty funny. i appreciate how they aren't just dumping world building on my head, just sorta letting me marinate in the world first.

environments looked really detailed and lovely but... i need to explore a little more. i need to know if we're getting little fun details like hsr. are there garbage cans for me to interact with. please. my inner trailblazer calls to me.

characters. again. just started. but i do like the sly hares or whatever they're called! billy is a silly goose, the girl is really funny as well. Nicole is cool. i like a stingy bitch lol. i'm really loving the mcs so far. i like their dynamic and their designs are really cute. i almost picked the female mc because i was worried about dialogue differences on the little date sections but... if i pick the guy and we don't get gender differences in the dialogue i can get some really yaoiful stuff and i can't risk missing out on that. plus hes cute. i REALLY love his eyes. the slightly lifted lower lid is a very unique and cute feature.

i think overall its interesting. the vibe is really cool and different from hoyos other games. but to be honest im not sure its for me? the modern techno fantasy thing IS cool, but it's not my favourite aesthetic. i think the arts good, but a little... plain? it doesn't really strike me as much as hoyos other products. that said it may be that they just look way better in motion. in cutscenes and stuff the charters look awesome but when they're standing still they seem a little dull. could be that i'm just used to the maximalist nature of their other games so a more restrained character reads as boring to me now...

there aren't really any designs that make me go ooohh yeah that right there is my WIFE!! and i'm not going to pretend that isn't my primary motivation for gacha games. so. we'll see how future characters turn out. everything just a bit more... cartoony i guess is the word? i dunno. nobody is really Hot with a capital H.

i'm getting off track since it's time for bed uh. one last thing. i feel very strongly i need to stop or minimize my time with others games especially in this launch period. i CAN technically keep playing everything i've got my hands on if i optimize the shit out of what i'm doing but. then i will be having absolutely no fun whatsoever and i need to avoid letting myself do that so. the current plan is

1) drop wuwa entirely for daily logins. i'm not sure i'm ready to quit quit but i don't really get much out of logging in right now so. i'll just stop and see if i miss it.

2) i'm gonna take a break from spending resin in genshin. i'm not even spending it on anything important lately and the battlepass is done so. i'm just going to stop doing it for a while. we're in the pre natlan slump so it's a good time to rest my genshin muscles.

3) as for hsr well. it's quick and we have auto lol. i'll just send my chars to grind for books since i'm literally out and it'll do both my resin and my dailies in one. truly do love this game

i know that SOUNDS a lot like optimizing and taking the fun out of everything but i swear its' not. optimizing would be finding a way to still be doing the dailies and resins for all 3 of those things plus whatever they have going on in pso. which is what i have been doing up til now. no more you hear me!! i may be the worlds biggest gacha apologist but even i can say you know what i've been indulging way to much lately i gotta cut back.

anyway. rant over, i'm going to bed. will continue my review tomorrow ^w^)/

[navxry]

🎟️

This is your ticket to go on a ramble of anything that’s on your mind or anything you want to go ahead and share! Lore, creations, thoughts, anything that’s interesting you lately.

Anon, I'm afraid you're giving me full rights to rant about the worst things in my head (/exag, it's not that bad I promise)

Anyways uh read more time!

Lowkey had thoughts of running a certain story in a different blog, or making a game for it. It's still in the works because I need to polish up a few things, make it make sense, etc., but it's still up there.

The reason why is actually pretty simple: I feel like people don't like to interact when it's not about the reader, so I decided that maybe I should make a game. It's going to have its own variation + my own indulgent version (that will NEVER see the light of day in my other blogs, fuck you), but I'm not sure if people would enjoy it. I know my friends would, but would someone that I don't know like that?

Speaking of which, I already have the blog made. 2, actually! One is for another purpose, which would be a love letter blog for a fandom. I missed writing IDV because I've left the game (it was becoming too much for my phone </3 sad time gamers), so I decided to try a love letter format for Yan IDV residents. I doubt I'll get traction, but it's a cute idea and self indulgent in a way, because I get to write my faves being in a variety of levels of unhinged.

I think I'm more or less hesitant on the first idea because it feels like the initial reception just... Didn't pan out so well haha. It feels like I'm trying to show my own personal stories to the wind, but the wind refuses to even acknowledge it's existence. With this method though, I can at least say that at least the people that like it will know where to look for it.

Again, it still needs polishing, it's not done and I sure as hell KNOW that it'll take months if I took the game route. However, I think it'll be worth it if I just push myself to try. It's the only thing I can feasibly do, after all.

To my friends who supported it and even to the people that followed the story in silence: thanks. You guys make it bearable for me to try this method. It sucks that it'll be something I (most likely) won't do on that blog and transferring it would be tough, but so is life atp. I'm probably gonna most likely cut it with plan B's ending (I knew my initial plan won't work orz), so uh. We'll see how it goes, yeah?

(also I am kinda glad I didn't get to 200 followers there ironically because MOST ARE FUCKING BOTS AND SOME ARE MINORS LIKE HELLO??? So unfortunately I have to block them en masse and tbh? I'm gonna update my rules for that. I don't want minors interacting there no sir.)

(yes I'm talking to a few of you that interacted there while knowing y'all are minors/ageless in your blogs. Don't think I don't see you.)

Anyways ty anon for giving me the ticket to rant, I needed that. Hopefully this didn't sound so depressing oops.

[iniwan]

still haven’t quite figured out how to do lineart with this intuos, but i though i’d try drawing my avatar on sapherna

[heartfullofleeches]

(Sorry for the long ask ヽ(；▽；)ノ)

Hello! I've been a follower of you and your work for a while now (I think for a year or three? I remember the first work I read that blew me away was the yandere x a reader who couldn't touch living things iirc) but I just wanted to say I'm so happy to see more work from you!

I would really love to draw to draw fanart of your other ocs (Alasdair and Elliott especially ^^) but I'm too worried about not drawing them right. I can draw, but I feel like I'm bad at remembering the exact looks of characters orz.

Will you consider making some type of masterpost with descriptions or art that people can use for reference for your ocs one day? -🧸

I remember that one. Wow it's been a while and to answer your question yes I'm working on character sheets for them all. It'll just take a moment since there's.... 6? Of them at the moment. I can give a description of their appearances for the time being though

[miguelmybeloved]

hey!!! I hope you're well!

anyway I really don't have any idea or prompt to ask but.. could you please explain yours AU's a bit more? you got me curious 👁️👁️(maybe later I have and idea but idk)

have a nice day!!❤️✨

hi!! thank you for the kind message !! and sorry it took me so long to respond orz i've been busy...;;

so my AUs are super underdeveloped like they're really only ideas at this point and i *was* planning on developing them more this summer but *looks at the calendar* that kinda went bust... 😬

but i love miguel and i love talking about this so!! thank you for asking about them lol 😆

"REALISTIC" AU

that name doesn't really feel accurate i just literally don't know what else to call it but its my AU where MC is from miami (aka self-insert au ig?? even tho its supposed to be a self-insert anyway?? idk idk) and i just kinda wanted to explore the ramifications of an MC that knows a Miami that's very different from the one that miguel is in, not only bc its the 80s but also the criminal element and also the general areas of miami that i grew up in are very different from where miguel grew up... i also wanted to do HEAVY research about miami in the 80s (maybe i can show off my reading list lol) to get a more "authentic" portrait of the city ??? SO LIKE all that mixed together would kinda end up changing the plot up bc like ofc it'll still be romantic bc im a simp BUT bc im writing like a narrative with other themes and an "OC" and not a romantic visual novel, the elements i'll steal from CMIM are more like the skeleton of the plot and not a scene-for-scene remake, ykwim? so bc of that, i also imagined it shorter and also like a movie script - three-act structure and all that jazz SO!! its an action/adventure/crime/romantic/comedy taking place in 1980s miami!! ALSO U WENT TO SEE A MOVIE AND GOT SUCKED IN SO LIKE i wanted to explore that and the "man out of time" angle that the visnov can't rlly get into bc it can't assume anything about what time period ur from without breaking the self-insert illusion AND ALSO i rlly wanted some ängst re: if this is all real or if everything is gonna end once the "movie's over" ya kno i just love that drama spice of "do u love me bc ur supposed to love me, is any of this ur choice, what will happen when i wake up" and all that jazz 🤭 heehee hoohoo

IT IS MY BABY AND I WISH TO SEE IT COME TO LIFE

ACTOR AU

bc every fandom's got one lmao 😉 its just the perfect way to keep the original story in tact while also keeping characters that you love alive lol (no spoilers but i saw *****'s death coming from a MILE away) so yeah this is just a silly self indulgent AU where everyone lives and CMIM is a movie that miguel stars in and MC is a production assistant that dreams of being big shot director someday or smthg and then oops they fall in love lmao NGL as i was writing this down, i realized this would make a pretty decent "singing in the rain" AU LMAO 😂 its not perfect 1-for-1 but like miguel as don, mc is cathy, ramon is cosmo, stella is lena 🤣🤣🤣🤣 this is too funny to me lmfaoooo i'd prob take insp from singing in the rain as far as plot goes bc i literally had none but still is more of an "actor au" than a "signing in the rain au"

also just realized that the movie they make in the actor AU could be the "movie" im writing for the realistic AU loool 😆

[merakiui]

Mera! I'm losing track of the days lol, but so long as i send an ask a week, i think i should be okay 😂

Also feel free to post your hsr hair thoughts bc i love to read your rambles as much as your fics! I'm looking forward to the jade one and him imitating floyd is really amusing. I like to think jade has a sort of pride about him where he loathes being compared to floyd but also jokes it off when someone does or when someone mistakes them, so i can imagine his pride and ego taking a hit but he endures it for sake of reader. Almost like he gets addicted to acting like floyd bc everyone likes floyd better anyways, right? So why not give the people what they want! He receives such a positive response when he acts like floyd that it rewires the hurt in his brain and suddenly the thing he hates is now cathartic for him but theres still that underlying hurt underneath >.<

BUT thats not why im here hehehe, for this weeks questionnnnn......

Who do you think would be the 'final girl' in a slasher film from each dorm? And then if u can, who do you think would be the ultimate survivor? You can optionally bestow the other titles; the virgin who lives but is hurt, the killer in hiding and the idiots who are the first to go, etc :D i read a yandere slasher fic here on tumblr where reader goes into a cabin with her friends and they get killed off one by one until the yandere presumably fucks reader and it has me back in my horror phase 😅 just pretend its Halloween in june, like xmas in july hahaha

-🐔 anon!!!!

:D hi hi 🐔!!!! Thank you for enjoying my writings and ramblings and for your interest in the upcoming Jade fic!! He'd do anything for you, even if it means he has to endure bittersweet pain just to see you smile. >_< all he wants is a chance with you and he gets that when he acts as Floyd. It may be uncomfortable and it may chip away pieces of his pride as an individual, but you laugh at his jokes and look at him like he's the only one in your world. He'll do whatever he can just to receive a crumb of your affection, even if it's all meant to be reserved for Floyd. Aaaa I love writing this version of Jade!!!! He's just so interesting and obsessed!! orz

Ooooo final girls from each dorm!!! That's such a fun question. Here are my thoughts!!! ^w^

Heartslabyul's final girl would be Cater. He's so perfect for the final girl trope! You think he might die first because he's pretty and can't let go of his phone for the life of him, but when he gets serious he can be very cutthroat. <3 the idiotic duo would have to be Ace and Deuce. Deuce hears a strange noise and wants to check it out because he's definitely not scared of demons or killers and he'll beat up anything that tries to hurt him and his friends. Ace thinks he's trying to prank him, but he begrudgingly follows him, thinking it's either nothing and Deuce is trying to scare him or it'll just turn out to be something with a completely natural explanation. It's neither, and while they're both bickering the killer looms from behind. Riddle is the logical one who tries to put everything into perspective and figure out a logical reason behind everything. Trey is, unsurprisingly, the mom friend who just wants everyone to stay in one place because hopefully the authorities will show up soon (they never will).

Savanaclaw's final girl is Ruggie. He's resourceful and cunning; you think he may die first, but he's actually very good at survival. He'll live, but he comes out of the horrific night covered in blood after he's just fought the killer to the death. Jack is your typical jock, kind-hearted and caring, who doesn't believe in any of that ghost stuff or horror movie trope stuff, but when it becomes too real he gets even more serious than before, determined to survive and protect those close to him. Leona strikes me as the type who, upon the first sign of something suspicious or dangerous, promptly leaves. He will not be swept up in any murder plots, no thank you. <3 either that or he sleeps through it all and the killer thinks he's dead at first glance LOL.

Octavinelle's final girl would be Floyd. As goofy as he is, he's also another cutthroat guy who can and will survive. He may throw himself directly at danger, but somehow he always comes out of it alive. Jade is your typical killer-in-hiding. You won't suspect him until it's too late, and by then nearly half the cast is dead. Azul is the type who acts like an ally to everyone, but he's secretly either plotting with the killer or planning to sacrifice everyone in order to save himself.

Scarabia's final girl is Jamil. Most of his decisions are made solely to protect Kalim (who naturally is the comedic relief/carefree friend who is just too sweet for this world), but there's a build-up in this movie where the plot twist is that Jamil ultimately ends up tricking Kalim. Is it possible for both him and Jamil to survive? Perhaps, but this isn't that kind of movie. :) and from the bloodshed, Jamil emerges, alive, exhausted, and traumatized. (Or I could also see Jamil as a killer-in-hiding and Kalim as the final girl; it fits either way in my mind hehe!! :D)

Pomefiore's final girl is either Epel or Vil. It's hard to choose just one of them for the trope because I feel like it can fit them both in different ways. Rook is obviously the killer-in-hiding or he's just that really unnerving character who happens to know too much about how a killer thinks. >_< Vil as a final girl would be so cool because I think he can also be quite cutthroat. He's the character type who spends most of his focus on himself throughout the movie, yet he still manages to survive. How, you may ask? He weaponized various beauty products or, my most favorite idea, he fought the killer in heels and won, by which the heels absolutely became his weapon. >:) Epel as a final girl would be somewhat surprising because he's the character who no one really expects to live because he's "so petite and cute and omg how will he ever survive the big, scary killer!!!!" D: but then Epel shocks everyone when he ends up arming himself with brass knuckles or a baseball bat to go hunt down the killer himself.

Ignihyde's final girl is Idia, but then he also fits into the loser nerd category. Idia as a final girl is a little frustrating because he spends the entire movie being prideful and rude to the other characters, so everyone sort of wants him to be killed off first because he's so unlikable. But because Idia's seen all of these tropes before and knows his way around a horror movie, he ends up surviving. Ortho survives as well, but then I can also picture him being something of a sci-fi horror villain (i.e. technology becomes bad and targets humans). It's something like in book six where he was giving the students little tests in order to advance to the next level. Just a little villainous and devious!

Diasomnia's final girl is Silver. The stress of the situation manages to keep him awake, and so he's mainly in survival mode for the entirety of the film. Silver does his best to protect everyone, even putting himself at risk if it means he can save his friends. Sebek likely puts up a good fight, but he's far too stubborn and can't be quiet to save his life, so he ends up getting killed. I feel like Lilia could be a killer-in-hiding, or he's just the mischievous trickster type. Malleus could also be a killer-in-hiding, or he's the trope of "misunderstood character with a reputation that is solely rumors who turns out to be quite sweet and helpful to the main character."

[icharchivist]

My very first theory about Maria was that she was Cross' sister. But I realised that Marian was actually Cross' last name, so someone named Maria Marian would be way too strange, even for DGM. Then I thought that maybe she used to be his master? he had to have one when he became an exorcist right ? (I also read tons of fic where she was Allen's mom, but with pastAllen that's out of the window too) Anything about Maria is just a big question mark 😫 I'm sure it'll really important tho

Ooooh!! 

Okay I admit her being Cross’s sister seems a little... well it’s just there is absolutly nothing that can hint toward this direction except “this would be less creepy than having the corpse of a random exorcist as a weapon”, we don’t know anything about Cross’s family so anything is fair game i believe. But it’s true if Cross was their last name the name could have been a nice touch.

However, her being possibly Cross’s master is by far one that really interests me there. If only because well if it’s someone who was Cross’s caretaker there is far more reasons to try to go out of his way to make her power be useful, especially if she taught him the strings to start with. Also it could be enough to justify how Cross was there in time to get back the corpse, and perhaps with luck at least a little more consent when it comes to it happening if it’s something they might have agreed on beforehand.

And like you mention yeah Cross should have had a master right? I mean he didn’t just kick his way out of hell fully formed with his shady behavior and knowledge, he had to be formed somewhere. Evenmoreso to know all the secrets he knows from inside the Order so a master would make sense, and it being Maria.. yeah I could see that.

(Ahah but no surprise there. Especially before the Past!A reveals. Also i think if you want to search for an AU to give Allen a family this is probably one of the oldest woman of Allen’s life that can play a part... I guess.)

But i do agree, she is a big question mark and i do feel like it’s important. Or at least it just ties more in Cross’s mysteries and it must means something right?

And tbh i remain kinda haunted by her existance considering the Second Exorcist Projects had the sort of same ideas of “not wasting the accomodator’s bound with the innocence by bringing the accomodator back” - but it went on differently with the 2EP taking the brain of the fallen into new bodies hoping this would just connect back to the innocence while Cross just controles a mindless Maria like a puppet. It makes such a creepy dicotomy between the specific purpose of “not letting the accomodators go to waste”. 

If anything it really goes further in demonstrating how the Order’s ressources are sparce. The Innocence is the trickiest weapons humanity could have got, considering you have to be chosen by one out of 109 crystals, be around it at the right time, not to mention many had been destroyed with the thousands years of the war, and many others are still dormant or hiden. Just like “forcing the Exorcists who had been chosen to fight” or the ones we see become Fallen in Lenalee’s flashback by forcing people who has bloodties with accomodators to try to connect to the innocence: the Order is desperate. Losing one exorcist is losing a weapon. And they cannot afford that.

I think by the time of the end of the Attack to the Order arc there is only 14 active innocences in the Order. Out of 109 crystals. For countless of Akuma. Scary.

Maria is basically a sort of “not letting those ressources go to waste” and it is rightfully creepy. Butit shows how desperate the Order is and by just accepting it as a possibility I think the audience made path to understand the implications of the Second Exorcist Projects afterward.

(tbh this is one of the reason I would have died to see Kanda react directly to the use of Grave of Maria. But by the time Cross was alive I think any reactions Kanda would have had would have been a spoiler. Still would love to know his thoughts on that).

So as she is, Maria represents already the extremes you have to go through to go around how sparces the ressources to win the war are, and in itself a way to make the audience used to the idea before the 2nd Exorcist Project hits.

But whenever she is a bigger character with bigger ties with Cross.... This is still speculations and yea as far as it goes i prefer it being “Cross’s master who probably was already trying to get as many exorcists as possible so would rather not waste innocences and would probably agree/have agreed with Cross over the approach to not let an innocence go to waste” than any “random exorcist that didn’t ask for it like Kanda/Alma”

So.. yeah orz

[slaughterchichi]

Hello! I was wondering what kinks you most enjoy writing?

Also, regarding your last ask - I don't think I'm alone in wanting to read your more dubious, non-fluffy fics if you'd ever want to post some! :))

Well... I'm a simple man of simple pleasures and my main kinks are generally par for the course in mlm fics~ So... butt stuff is pretty much guaranteed and this makes me very happy. It is probably Enjoyment #1 if I'm honest. I'm also incredibly partial to humiliation and teasing *coughs* so those get thrown in by accident even when I'm not trying. It's not a kink exactly but Dom/sub dynamics are just... so so good that I don't need there to be other kinks as long as that's satisfied. Anything else at that point is just extra dressing, though I'm also very into crossdressing (who would have guessed~~?) and I find that really fun too.

Spanking is always fun to write but it can get a bit stale if you do it too much and well... hm. I like watersports of varying degrees but I haven't lived down the 3/4 I posted within like a week two years ago so I'm trying to steer clear of it for now. You would be surprised how many people know of me as "the pee guy" because of that orz

There are other kinks I really really like but putting them into words sometimes just feels too complicated. I wanna write shibari, for example, but I get nervous that I'll explain it wrong or take too long trying to get it just right and end up boring people in the process. Another thing on this list is proper foot fetish stuff - I've dabbled with it here and there but not to the extent that I would like.

I have already posted a couple of the darker things over the years on AO3 (not all of it is ZS though) but maybe I'll get around to some of the unfinished WIPs! There's one I've been working on every now and then that I really love the idea of but it'll probably be very long and I want to get it right so I'm kind of setting myself up for failure with it. In fact, I've been working on it for so long that I would need to redo some chunks to fit my current writing style too. Hm, we'll see~

Kill the Night, A Bad Hobby and Shinjuu may be up your alley though, if you've not read them already :) [remember to hit the back button if you’re not having a good time!!]

What amuses me though is that you said non-fluffy... A while back I posted a dub-con fic without a warning and people thought it was really cute XD; Still surprises me even now that no one has pointed it out lol

[yuebikko]

Hey...I don't know what you're going through but I just want to let you know you've got my support and I know you're strong. You are a strong person, but even strong people have their moments. Try not to let your emotions burn you inside out. Do what you have to do to feel better. And don't ever feel like you're being annoying by taking to someone about yourself- about how you're feeling. It'll feel that way at first and even while you're talking, but it helps get the things inside out.

I, I feel kinda like I don’t know me for complete. I don’t really know exactly how to express these emotions so you know, the first things I try out always is to draw but hear me out.

I have responsibilites that I am putting as priority right now, I live alone right now and it’s like I can’t be doing anything that feels a waste of time (which deep inside I know anything that it’s for making me feel better because i feel uneasy or sad is not a waste of time but anyways, just to put it in a way), so I haven’t been drawing in like 3 weeks.

When I can’t draw, my second way to express or try to find out what’s going on with me is by writing, but you know? I don’t feel I am doing it right, so that comes another problem for me.

I don’t have a way to…vent all the things I feel and actually find what I want to do with me or anything is related to me. I have been struggling with that for days now, I am feeling a bit more relieved now but because I don’t think about it…I am the type of person who thinks is annoying when starts to talk shit about myself and it’s like, idek …I find myself unable to find an answer and makes me really frustrated.

I know I should…talk, I know some people out there are worried about me or they don’t want me to be sad. I know I can ask for help but it’s hard. I am way too hard on myself, I think about others comfort instead of me and I demonize my own negative emotions thinking I will give others a burden that it’s mine to take.

I don’t know if that makes some sense? I am trying to put what I think about it orz…but, yeah…I appreciate these kind of messeges, I mean, I always used this site to distract my mind and I don’t usually talk to anyone right now, which is kinda a bit sad for me because I would like to open up and make new friends…but idek lmaooo I still think I am a noisy person to be friends with.

thank you and…I guess I should try to talk more instead of stop it.