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#it's easier to say no when i can't even explain very well what DOES happen
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doctors: try to remember the depression is not you
me, internally: so do you want me to end up psychotic or
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onskepa · 4 months
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Hi how are you? If you want, could you tell us what your headcanons would be for what the Sully children's relationship would be like with a human/avatar mother who was mated with Jake and Neytiri? Thank you very much, have a great day!
I can see a lot of possible outcomes for this one! So here ya go! Enjoy!
P.S: Reader will not be given a name in this one, instead she will be called "small mama"
Pinnacle protection
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Pinnacle motherhood
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Right off the bat, the whole family loves their third mother, second mate. Jake sully couldn't ask for a better family, and better mates. Especially his little human mate. Neytiri will agree with him, while yes she has her children to hug, her little mate is just what she needs. Something small yet full of love just for her. 
Now like any trio, there is a balance between the parents. Jake is the head of the family, the brains with his clever ideas. Neytiri at times can be the brains but most muscle due to her skills in fighting and hunting. And their beloved human is the heart of the family. Keeping everyone together. 
And like any child, the sully kids will have favorites. And their favorite is their amazing human mother. She is the most fun, loving parent any child could ever ask for. Are they not getting their way with Jake or neytiri? To mama it is! And mama will always fold by the simple look of her kids. 
Another thing about their favorite mama, they all believe she has the power to read their minds. How else would it explain she knows their next move? 
Lo’ak and tuk can recall so many instances where they were barely forming an idea only for their mama to say “dont even think about it” or “it is not worth the trouble”. 
For neteyam, as he is the oldest he does try to be a good example for his mischievous siblings, along with holding so many responsibilities, but he can always count on his small mama for anything. Small mama consoles him, talking about anything neteyam has his mind about. 
Unlike Jake or neytiri who neteyam has to put up a strong warrior face, with a small mama he can revert back to being a baby with her. He feels safe and be a kid again with her. And small mama always called him her “little baby boy”. Neteyam won't admit it but he likes it when she calls him that. 
For kiri, she definitely adores her small mama. She is closer to her third parent than she is with neytiri. Not to be mean or anything. But with Jake, Kiri can talk about what odd things happen around her, ask her about her mother and stuff but with her small mama. Well, she can express far more with her, be free to say anything not be judged upon. Kiri can dare say small mama understands her more than anyone in the world.
With tuk, the baby of the family. Why, she loves to be the taller one, it makes her happy. Of course she would never tease her small mama that she is taller, but small mama would call her “tiny tuk”. A name tuk loves and will glady flex it for some reason. 
If tuk can't go somewhere with her older siblings, small mama would personally take her anywhere she wants to go. As long as it is safe. With small mama, everything is fun and never boring. Tuk loves the times where her hair is braided or she braids small mama’s hair. 
Now, if small mama would use her avatar, nothing much would change. Except that now the kids will demand piggy back rides. Tuk or lo’ak would be front of the line for that.  
Hunting would be easier and much more fun with jake and neytiri, running, riding their ikrans, less risk overall. 
Even with her avatar, she is still short compared to her two mates. She is smaller than Neytiri by 9 ½ inches. Not something she is super thrilled about. No matter what body, she is still small mama through and through. 
Small mama is forever grateful to live her best life with her family, loving them and saying her thanks to Eywa for blessing her to be the best of her two worlds. Through hardships, through trials, small mama has a mighty heart and a roar of an ikran. Yes sometimes she might be stressed or frustrated but life is not perfect. Small mama knows that all too well. But there is nothing better than what she has. 
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jessica-problems · 4 months
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Seeing @thydungeongal constantly wrestling with people interpreting her posts about D&D in ways that seem completely alien to me has convinced me that there are actually multiple completely distinct activities both being referred to as "playing D&D" Before we begin, I want to stress that I'm not saying one of these groups is Playing The Game Wrong or anything, but there seems to be a lot of confusion and conflict caused by people not being aware of the distinction. In fact, either one works just fine if everyone's on the same page. So far, I think I've identified at least two main groups. And nobody seems to realize the distinction between these groups even exists. The first group of people think of "Playing D&D" as, well, more or less like any other board game. Players read the whole rulebook all the way through, all the players follow the instructions, and the gameplay experience is determined by what the rules tell each player to do. This group thinks of the mechanics as, not exactly the *whole* game, but certainly the fundamental skeleton that everything else is built on top of. People in the second group think of "Playing D&D" as referring to, hanging out with their friends, collaboratively telling a story inspired by some of the elements in the rulebooks, maybe rolling some dice to see what happens when they can't decide. This group thinks of the mechanics of the game as, like... a spice to sprinkle on top of the story to mix things up. (if you belong to this second group, and think I'm explaining it poorly, please let me know, because I'm kind of piecing things together from other people saying things I don't understand and trying to reverse engineer how they seem to be approaching things.) I think this confusion is exacerbated by the fact that Wizards of the Coast markets D&D as if these are the same thing. They emphatically are not. the specific rules laid out of the D&D rulebooks actually direct players to tell a very specific kind of story. You can tell other stories if you ignore those rules (which still counts as "playing D&D" under the second definition, but doesn't under the first)And I think people in both groups are getting mad because they assume that everyone is also using their definition. For example, there's a common argument that I've seen play out many times that goes something like this:
A: "How do I mod D&D to do [insert theme here]?" B: "D&D is really not built for that, you should play [other TTRPG] that's designed for it instead" A: "But I don't want to learn a whole new game system!" B: "It will be easier to just learn a whole new system than mod D&D to do that." A: "whatever, I'll just mod D&D on my own" And I think where this argument comes from is the two groups described above completely talking past each other. No one understands what the other person is trying to say. From A's perspective, as a person in the second group, it sounds like A: "Anyone have some fun inspirations for telling stories about [insert theme here]?" B: "You can't sit around a table with your friends and tell a story about that theme! That's illegal." A: "But we want to tell a story about this theme!" B: "It's literally impossible to do that and you're a dumb idiot baby for even thinking about it." A: "whatever, jerk, I'll figure it out on my own."
--- Whereas, from B's perspective, the conversation sounds like A: "How do I change the rules of poker to be chess, and not be poker?" B: "uhhh, just play chess?" A: "But I already know how to player poker! I want to play poker, but also have it be chess!" B: "what the hell are you talking about? What does that even mean. They're completely different games." A: "I'm going to frankenstein these rules together into some kind of unplayably complex monster and you can't stop me!" ---
So both people end up coming away from the conversation thinking the other person is an idiot. And really, depending on how you concieve of what it means to "play D&D" what is being asked changes considerably. If you're only planning to look through the books for cool story inspiration, maybe borrow a cool little self contained sub-system here or there, then yeah, it's very possible to steal inspiration for your collaborative story from basically anywhere. Maybe some genres are kind of an awkward fit together, but you can make anything work with a little creativity.
If, however, you are thinking of the question in terms of frankensteining two entire board games together, then it becomes a massively difficult or even outright nonsensical idea. For example, for skill checks, the game Shadowrun has players roll a pool of several d6 at once, then count up how many rolled above a target value to see how well a character succeeded at a task. The whole game is full of specific rules about adding or removing dice from the pool, effects happening if you roll doubles, rerolling only some of the dice, and all sorts of other things that simply do not translate to rolling a single d20 for skill checks. On a basic level, the rules of the games work very differently. Trying to make them compatible would be much harder than just learning a new game from scratch. Now, neither of these approaches is exactly *wrong*, I guess, but personally, I find the rules of TTRPGs to be fascinating and worth taking the time to engage with all the weird little nuances and seeing what shakes out. Also, the first group, "TTRPG as fancy board game" is definitely the older and more widespread one. I kind of get the impression that the second group largely got into D&D through actual play podcasts, but I don't have any actual data to back that up. So, if you're in the second group, who thinks of D&D as basically a context for collaborative storytelling first and a game second, please let me know if I'm wildly misunderstanding how you approach D&D. Because I'm pretty sure it would save us a whole lot of stupid misunderstandings.
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ooffmlsorry · 10 months
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OP Men When You're Injured
Context: I don't mean mortally injured, I'm talking something not too serious that kind of inhibits your movement like a broken bone or recovery from a surgery
Law, Kid, Ace, Luffy, Zoro, Sanji
Law
A/N: can we get a little commotion for this gif tho?? Why is he so perfect?? 😭
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Law as a doctor is perfectly normal about your injury. He knows with some rest and eventual rehabilitation you'll be just fine. No big deal.
He makes sure you're healing well and comfortable, like he would with any patient
Law as your boyfriend is different.
In the case of an injury with no risk of infection, he'll press a kiss to it. Yes, like he's kissing your boo-boo 🥹
Law does not leave your side. He is your shadow. Where you go, he's right beside you or at the very least in the same room as you.
At first he deadass tries to convince you he's not lingering at all and he's the same as he always is.
But you both know he's lying. He practically moves his office wherever you decide to be for the day.
He can't help himself. What if you fall? What if you reinjure yourself? He's so pressed about the worst case scenarios, and given his past, can you blame him?
He quietly grumbles and pouts about his own "irrational" behavior because he knows in reality you can absolutely go about your day. You're a little slower but you're fine. But he just can't let you. As soon as you start to struggle, he's right beside you offering to help.
If you're aggravated by his hovering, he's twice as annoyed by it. He's literally so frustrated with himself lmao, you might end up having to comfort him instead.
Even if he complains (is it really complaining if he's actually happy lol) you're happy because all this extra time around you makes him extra affectionate. Law snuggles close to you, justifying his closeness by explaining how physical affection can lower cortisol levels.
KID
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Oh Kid smh 😔he has no idea how to treat you so he just decides to behave like everything's normal lmao
Legitimately though, even if a inanimate object is what caused your injury, he's destroying it. Just out of pure fury that you were hurt.
He'll huff when you fall behind or have trouble doing something, but he just can't leave you to suffer
He's a man of action lol so he'll probably end up doing things for you just for efficiency sake. You're walking too slow? He picks you up. Can't grab or hold something? He'll do the whole thing for you and next time you try to do the same thing you find he's made something to make it a lot easier for you while you heal.
Anything you need to assist you he'll happily build.
If you have a cast or anything like that, he's gonna draw all over it (honestly, the whole crew will. You're gonna have the most bad ass cast ever)
He absolutely calls you a baby for wincing or complaining. He doesn't mean it...mostly.
If he's not keeping an eye on you than Killer is.
It's not like he's worried or anything! Fuck you for saying that!! He just doesn't want to hear or see you whining and complaining. It's annoying. Okay, sure Kid.
He genuinely hate seeing you in pain though, even if it's just wincing it reminds him of losing his arm and he never wants you to experience anything close to that.
ACE
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Ace is your little emotional support boyfriend...or maybe it's the other way around 🤭.
He'll curl up at your side while you recuperate and completely dozes off.
He takes looking after you very seriously and asks Marco lots of questions, even if there's not a whole lot he can do.
He doesn't pity you, but he does feel really bad. Even if it was just an accident, he hates seeing you limited in any way.
He might accidentally treat you like you're made of glass.
It's just because he cares a lot, and he really doesn't want anything else to happen to you.
Every single morning he wakes up and asks how you're feeling or if you're in any pain.
There's a lot of people on the Moby Dick and accidents happen all the time, so don't be surprised when he literally clears a way for you to traverse around the ship.
I'm not saying he's impatient buuuut he will definitely glare at whatever part of you is injured and say, "Jeez, can you heal up already?"
He gives you space, but only if you ask for it. He just doesn't want you to feel like you're ever in this alone.
LUFFY
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Luffy is neither patient nor gentle lol but he's extremely loyal
He'll goof off and continue to go on adventures, but he's not gone for long
Even his crew is surprised when tells them he's not going to get distracted because he knows you're back on the Sunny waiting for them.
He's always bringing cool things back to you since you can't do as much as you usually can. Just because you can't be right beside him doesn't mean you have to miss everything.
God bless him he's gonna try to bring you some meat so you'll heal faster 🤭.
He'll absolutely forget you're injured at some point and probably tackle hug you.
The last thing he'll let you do is stay cooped up in bed unless Chopper insists that you have to. Even if you need to rest you can do it right next to him on the head of the Sunny, right?
Exactly like Ace he's going to frown at whatever part of you is injured and say, "Jeez, can you heal up already?!"
He gets whatever you need and probably overdoes it. Need a glass of water? He just straight up brings you the whole barrel.
More is better! Besides, you need to hurry up and get better!
ZORO
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He's not worried. He's so chill about it, actually. ...Until you start to move around.
The way he switches up is laugh worthy. He goes from nonchalant to overprotective in an instant.
He practically holds his breath as you make your way around the Sunny, watching you like a hawk.
Admittedly, he does tease you a little. He'll grab things for you, but hold them out of your reach or call you a little turtle if you move slower. He thinks it's very cute hehe.
For better or for worse, Zoro's not a hypocrite. He won't hound you to take it easy if you think you're up to a task. Even if Chopper really wishes he would.
He still won't leave you though, unless you're resting and stationary, he's by your side.
Zoro is your attack dog boyfriend. There's no way anyone (*ahem* Luffy) is fooling around too close to you. There's not going to be a chance you could get hurt more or reinjured.
When you're alone he checks in with you to make sure you're okay, not because he's shy about being soft in front of people but more so to protect your privacy.
He kind of likes doing extra things for you, he won't say it out loud but it makes him really happy when he can do things while you recover. He considers taking care of someone he loves to be such an honor.
SANJI
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Unless whatever injured you is vitally important (e.g. the Sunny), he's kicking the shit out of it on principle because how dare anything even dare to hurt you lmao
Are you surprised that he dotes on you hand and foot? You shouldn't be.
I think it also goes without saying he is cooking you best meals.
They're gonna have to tie him down when it comes time for your rehabilitation because he wants to do everything for you.
He's such a sweet heart! He leaves you little messages like "you're doing great!" and "I love you!"
Literally this man lives with you on the ship and he still got you flowers, a get well card, and a little stuffed animal like he's not going to see you every single day
He loves carrying you (as long as it's Chopper approved). He's beaming down the sunny with you in his arms.
He makes the cutest little picnics so you can eat comfortably
Sanji's also an emotional support boyfriend lol. In between cooking for the crew and other duties, he's curled up right next to.
He might coddle you a little too much but it's just because he loves you so so so much
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riality-check · 1 year
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TW: past verbal and emotional abuse
The Harrington house is a game of perfection.
Steve has known this fact for as long as he can remember. There is a right way, a narrow way, a rigid way, of doing things. Numbers dictate all: rebounds, points, and assists for basketball, new PRs in freestyle and backstroke for swim. The numbers themselves do not matter; all that does is that they grow and shrink appropriately.
Infinite growth is not sustainable; not for Steve's stats, not for Richard's stocks. Both of them strive for it anyway.
The house must be clean. The parties can't be busted. The people of Hawkins will only say good things about the Harrington family. Gloria strives for these things, day in and day out.
The Harrington house is also a game of Perfection.
Steve hated that game growing up. The one with the little yellow pieces and the blue board. He was never able to get all the pieces in the right spot before the board spit them all back out.
It made a ticking noise, like a time bomb. Steve doesn't know when he started associating that sound with his parents.
It fits. It fits almost too well. They're fine, at least for a little while. The ticking starts quiet, then grows louder and louder until everything blows up.
The thing is, in Perfection, that the board blows up even if you put all the pieces in the right spots in time. The thing is, in the Harrington house, that everything blows up even if Steve does everything right.
The ticking lasts for days sometimes, weeks others. It's impossible, random, and impossibly random.
The only consistent thing is the board blowing up. And when that happens, so does the shouting.
The Party thinks that Tommy and Carol taught Steve to be cruel. That they're the ones who taught him how to bare his fangs and spit venom. That once he left them, the rage left him.
He's okay with letting them think that. It's easier than explaining that Richard and Gloria are the ones who taught him how to snap and shout, how to tear holes in other people with a few well-spoken barbs.
When Steve thinks of his parents, he thinks of fighting. He thinks of his father calling him useless and his mother calling him an idiot. He thinks of his mother calling his father dirt and his father calling his mother a bitch.
There are never any apologies. "I'm sorry" is never said in the Harrington house, even when the board gets reset.
They say "I got you pizza for dinner." "I saw this at the store and thought of you." "Do you want to come with me to get gas?"
And with that, the ticking starts up again.
Horrible things are said when the board blows up. Steve says horrible things when the board blows up. He's called his father an asshole and his mother self-absorbed and apologized without any apology at all.
He cleaned the pool instead.
Steve doesn't want to the board to blow up in the middle of the Munson trailer. It's why he's keeping his mouth shut while Eddie yells at him.
"What the hell, Stevie?" Eddie shouts, arms flying. "I told you that you can’t do that!"
“You told me you don’t want me to,” Steve says, staying calm and measured.
Calm and measured. Not blowing up. Steve isn’t going to snap or shout or bitch. He isn’t.
“Fucking semantics!”
“They were saying-”
“I don’t care what they were saying!” Eddie roars. “I don’t give a shit what they say about me!”
It’s true. Wayne calls Eddie “Teflon,” says that nothing sticks to him, least of all anyone’s opinion. Steve knows that Eddie doesn’t care about what most people in Hawkins think about him.
But he cares very much about what the people who care about him think.
Steve can say a whole lot of things right now. He’s angry, physically biting his tongue to ground himself. He can say a whole lot of things to cut Eddie to the bone, to end the argument and then some.
But he won’t.
Love is knowing how to hurt someone and choosing not to. It’s using a knife to split an apple to share instead of to cut skin to ribbons.
Steve can’t trust himself not to slash Eddie open. He says awful things when everything goes to hell like this, snaps back hard when snapped at first, operates purely on instinct.
He doesn’t want to hurt Eddie, so he keeps his mouth shut.
“I care that you could have gotten hurt when you swung at those assholes,” Eddie continues. “I care that I wasn’t there with you when you defended yourself. I care that you won’t let me take a look at your hands and make sure they’re alright.”
Steve squeezes the knuckles of this right hand in his left. It stings, but he’s fine. Nothing broken. He knows from experience
“Stop it, you’re hurting yourself,” Eddie barks.
Steve lets go of his hands, lets them hang loosely at his sides.
“So, what the hell, sweetheart?” Eddie asks, still loud, still snappish.
A variety of terrible answers surges to the front of Steve’s mind. Eddie’s biggest insecurities, the things he’s only told Steve when he thought he was asleep. Ways to wipe the anger off his face and replace it with stuff easier to manage: shock, hurt, sadness. Things he would say if he didn’t particularly like Eddie, if he were still in high school, if he were still in his parents’ house.
Steve doesn’t say anything. He keeps the knife in its drawer. He closes his eyes tight and breathes in once, then again.
“Hey,” Eddie says, softer.
Steve opens his eyes to find him a step closer, hands up in surrender.
“I’m sorry,” Eddie says.
Oh.
Well.
Steve doesn’t know what to do with that.
He’s said it before. Of course he has. He knows the words, knows that he needed to say them to Dustin and Robin and Max, and he has. He’s stepped too far with jokes and forgot about some things and missed some things they’ve said.
But he’s never yelled at them. They’ve never yelled at him.
This is not how this is supposed to go. Eddie isn’t supposed to apologize. He’s supposed to clean Steve up or make him dinner or invite him along to go grocery shopping.
And Steve was supposed to snap back.
“It’s okay,” he says because that’s what he’s supposed to say, yeah?
Eddie shakes his head. “It’s not. I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”
“It was bound to happen.”
Eddie stares at him, big doe eyes shining, like he has five heads. It makes Steve want to put his bloody hands behind his back, make him shrink.
He swears he can hear ticking, but the board just reset. Didn’t it?
“What?” Eddie asks.
Steve shrugs. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not. I got scared, but that doesn’t mean I get to yell at you. That’s not okay.”
What does Eddie get to do, if not yell?
I deserve it, Steve thinks, but he’s smart enough to know that saying that out loud will just lead to another fight.
There’s been barely any time to put the pieces back.
Steve doesn’t get it. But, he figures he’s always been a little slow on the uptake, so he can watch. Observe. Figure it out later on his own. He’s pretty good at that.
“Okay,” Steve says.
“Okay?”
“Yeah,” he says, and he holds his hands out for Eddie to take.
He’s dragged along to the sink, where Eddie rinses the cuts out with cool water before bandaging them up with the remnants of a box of Band-Aids from the bathroom. When they’re dry and finished, he presses a kiss to each knuckle, feather light.
“I’m sorry,” he says again, looking at Steve very seriously.
“Me, too,” Steve says, voice a little hoarse. “I’m sorry.”
It feels good to say. It feels good to mean.
Standing there in the kitchen of a trailer in Forest Hills, looking at the mismatched furniture and half-full ashtrays of the living room, holding hands with his boyfriend formerly accused of murder and apologizing for the first time and meaning it, Steve feels like he can finally breathe.
The ticking has finally stopped, and silence sounds so sweet.
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cheonsa-n · 2 months
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"Bloberta made Clay drink so-"
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OKAY, BUT DO YOU KNOW WHY?
Let me explain
'Help'.
A very important word when describing Bloberta.
First, it is integral to understand that Bloberta feels torturously alone and unwanted. Her friends are all getting married while she has no one.
She isn't clever enough to help Censordoll.
Her own family leaves her out of the family choir. 
And the only crumb of validation she is offered is from her mother.
“Why don't you help me out and… Clean your room?” Note even the slight pause her mother has, as if she doesn't even know what to do with Bloberta.
Next, we see her trudge to her room. And what does she hide under the covers of her bed?
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A flask.
She turns to alcohol when she is confronted with how unwanted she is. But where did that draw to alcohol come from?
We know she comes from a home where she is ultimately ignored and seen as valueless by everyone except one person.
Her Father.
I have a lot of thoughts about Bloberta and Raymond's relationship (the one scene where they interact just UGH LIVES IN MY HEAD) but the main thing to get away from it is that she associates the act of drinking with her Father.
A man who, without alcohol, is unable to speak his mind at all. He drinks to better tolerate his situation and his wife, who clearly doesn't value his words or opinions.
But Bloberta is very receptive to her Father, she greatly values his company and his thoughts and she finds comfort in being around him. She feels like someone cares about her and values her even if she knows he can't change anything.
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Notice that despite her desperation to speak with her father, to form that connection that would validate her, she can't even touch him because she knows doing so would break the frail connection they have currently. Her Father is so reserved that at this point, any unexpected emotional reach would immediately cause him to shut down and retreat. Demonstrated just by him closing up immediately after she told him she loved him.
So how does this affect Blobertas perception of alcohol?
Well she says it herself.
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"I think it helps us to be better people".
This rationality was reinforced by the small acts of kindness her father would show her.
And we don't have any reason to believe she is lying about this because up until the night of the reception, she's experienced nothing that contradicts this belief.
Bloberta's reliance on alcohol can be seen as her reaching for a solution to her need to feel wanted. She knows she's left out, both by friends and family. But if she believes drinking can make you become a better person? Then of course she would drink, because maybe then someone will want her.
What does she say directly after that?
"My Father drinks.”
Further insinuating her belief that he is good and he is the main reason she sees alcohol as a positive force.
She thought it would genuinely help Clay.
There's that word again.
Importantly, notice her clear anxiety and tenseness in her beginning interactions with Clay. From her first question, their conversation began falling apart.
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So what happened?
Just after the wedding, she was almost suave in the way she invited Clay to the reception.
Why was she so nervous now?
Well, in her eyes, this was her chance.
After an undisclosed time of having no luck she finally convinces a handsome single man to have some semblance of a date with her.
She NEEDS this to go well.
So she's obviously anxious and stressed, and that's showing, but she figures that some drinks will make it easier for both of them. She's full panicking because she feels it's just so normal to drink, especially socially, and she can't understand why he wouldn't drink. She has no frame of reference for that mindset.
Things are already awkward between them once they settle in, and its not getting better. So of course she is going to fall back on what makes things easier for her.
And initially things are looking up.
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Suddenly Clay's more talkative, and more receptive to what she's saying.
He's complimenting her.
He says she helped him.
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The one thing she wants more than anything is to feel useful, she wants to be able to fit into that role that everyone expects her to so that she can be of worth to someone.
She isn't worth it to her peers,
she isn't worth it to her family,
but she could be worth it to him.
This only reinforces her resolve. 
This is it.
She is going to finally find her place to fit in, and everyone will welcome her with open arms as she finally finds her place in the role society has chosen for her.
But it's not that simple.
Things go south quickly, Clay doesn't want these things that Bloberta has to have. 
But she needs them.
To Bloberta, those things are proof of your value. The value society, friends, and family place on you.
Who would she be if she couldn't attain that value?
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We again recognize that Bloberta has a fixation on being helpful. Helpfulness is the clearest indication of one's value, after all.
After being turned away by Clay, she immediately returns to a default ‘helpful’ act, cleaning. Just like her mother would tell her to do. But this was still her only chance, and Clay had already told her she had helped him. If she could only help him again, then maybe she had a chance at the real value she craved.
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Once her anger passes and Clay sobers up, she returns to him and paints herself as ‘helpful’ as possible. She's desperate for that validation again, and if he would agree to her help then everything would certainly be fine.
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She is practically begging him, help becomes a plea for him to save her from the pain of her day to day.
She hopes more than anything he will accept her and make all her pain go away.
He does accept, but in exchange, her previous world view is shattered.
Drinks don't help you become a better person.
They just help your true nature come out.
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dandylovesturtles · 1 year
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listen ok I know shit is dire in CAS land (by @somerandomdudelmao) but I had this stupid idea and it's a slow day at work and I type fast so here you go I didn't proofread this at all
I'm sorry I made it silly
Massive spoilers if you haven't read the new CAS update
...
"I can fix it," is a much easier thing to say than to do. Casey's thinking that as he takes long, quick strides through the lair, turning the problem over in his head as fast as he can. He hopes Uncle Tello can't hear the parts of his thoughts that are in a panic, but based on their conversation before he probably can.
Uncle Tello doesn't say anything about it, and Casey kind of wishes he would, just for the reassurance that he's still there.
He's so absorbed in his thoughts he doesn't notice Donnie (the younger Donnie, the physical Donnie) standing in front of him until it's too late and he's already collided with his back. Coffee spills everywhere, though thankfully it only splashes his plastron where he can't get burned.
Younger Donnie whirls, something distinctly murderous in his eye that feels so weird and wrong directed at Casey. It cools only slightly when Donnie processes it wasn't one of his brothers bumping into him, and somehow that feels just as weird, that Donnie has to readjust his feelings to accommodate the unfamiliarity. (He's not family, not to this Donnie.)
"Is something chasing you?" Donnie snaps.
"Uh... no-"
"Is there a fire?"
"No, but-"
"Do you need glasses?"
"I don't... think so?"
"Then watch where you're going!"
He spins on his heel and marches off, toward the kitchen to get more coffee, Casey assumes. For a moment he's left too off kilter and dumbfounded to remember what he was doing.
Then Uncle Tello's voice in his head startles him out of it. What just happened?
Oh, uh... I ran into the other version of you.
Ran into?
Literally. I spilled his coffee.
Ah, and he didn't take it well.
And Casey knows he shouldn't stop for this. Casey knows they may be on limited time and he has to fix this and Uncle Tello shouldn't have to listen to his whining about things that don't matter.
But he's been holding in so many feelings for so long and even if it's just in his head, hearing his uncle's (dad's) voice makes it rush out of him before he can stop it.
I don't think he likes me very much. I touched his shell the other day and he snapped at me. I got mad at him when he touched your tech and that made him mad, too. I don't know how to talk to him.
He doesn't really know how to talk to any of them, is the thing. It used to be the easiest thing in the world, and now it's a wall he hasn't yet learned how to scale.
He can feel his thoughts spiraling against his will. He doesn't have time for this, but the grief and the lack of sleep and the lack of easy affection are all mixing together with the weirdness of it all into a dangerous Molotov cocktail of emotions and he's not sure what will light the fuse.
Casey Jr, says Uncle Tello's voice.
Uncle Tello?
Do you want to see something really funny?
Casey can't help but make a strangled noise at the back of his throat, one that isn't a laugh but isn't a cry either. Something funny?
Yeah. Trust me, it'll be hilarious. Go to my lab.
Casey hesitates. He doesn't let me in there without him...
I feel confident I outrank him. Wait, how old is he?
Sixteen.
Ahhh, that explains it. I know I'm an absolute delight now, but at that age I could be a real pill.
It startles an actual laugh out of Casey. Without arguing further, he rushes to Donnie's lab, quick before he can finish brewing his coffee.
How do I get in?
Is this the subway?
Yeah.
Okay, there's a manual override for the voice lock hidden in one of the wall panels, should be... three to the left, middle of the door. Give that a good knock. Shave and a haircut~
Casey does as directed, and the panel slides back, revealing a flat, glossy keypad.
What's the access code? he asks, feeling like they're on some secret mission now. Maybe it doesn't fall into what people in this time consider normal, but to Casey this is standard stuff. He falls into the rhythm of it like a well loved song.
Oh one one four twenty one twenty seven, says Uncle Tello.
Casey punches it in and the door slides open. He slips inside and hits the button to close and lock the door behind him. Donnie still hasn't returned; the mission is proceeding as planned.
Wasn't that the code for one of the weapons lockers in the old- at base?
Yes, it was. Poor security protocol to reuse codes, I know, but I'm partial to that one.
What is it?
Atomic Lass's birth date. Uncle Tello pauses, then adds, Has he shown you any of the old Atomic Lass episodes of Jupiter Jim?
Uh, no...
Ah, continuing to fail my already low expectations, Teen Tello. Never mind, we'll worry about that later on.
Later on. Right, they shouldn't be doing this, they should be trying to fix Uncle Tello, they should be-
To my computer, Casey Jr! I can't type so you'll have to do it for me.
Uncle Tello's voice pulls him out of his reverie, and he hurries to do as he's told.
Uncle Tello walks him through passwords and then through navigating the OS. It's old and out of date compared to what they had in the future (Donatello's custom OS, better than the hacks at Apple and Microsoft, or so he said), but when Casey had called it old and out of date Donnie had gotten mad about that, too.
Ada Lovelace, this is old, says Uncle Tello's voice now, and incredibly Casey laughs again.
But they find what he's looking for and then input a series of commands into the command line. Casey isn't familiar with all of them, but if he had to guess, they just sent a video from late 2019 to every device in the lair.
Alright, mission accomplished, time to retreat, says Uncle Tello's voice, and he hurries out of the lab, just in time to hear a ping from the phone in his pocket.
He pulls it out and watches the video. It's Donnie, only slightly younger than the teen Casey now lives with, adjusting the camera before grinning and posing in front of it. He's in his lab, though a different one than the one here in the subway. He looks cocky.
He moves further back from the camera so his entire body is framed in its lens, then steps onto a skateboard. He glides in a circle for a moment, then jumps to try and do some kind of trick. Casey doesn't know the name of it, but what he does know is that Donnie's feet get caught in his board, and he ends up tumbling to the floor, crashing in an undignified heap, arms splayed out and face smooshed against the concrete.
It shouldn't be funny.
(It's pretty funny.)
It seems the others echo this sentiment, because suddenly Casey can hear laughter erupting from elsewhere in the lair.
"OMIGOSH! Barry, you gotta watch this!"
"HAHAHAHA BRO ATE SHIT!"
"Hah... Don't worry Donnie, I'm sure you'll get it next ti-hahahahaha!"
There's the sound of scurrying feet, and then Donnie slides into the hall, glaring at Casey who forgot he should be moving away from the crime scene.
"YOU!" he screeches.
Casey freezes. What is he supposed to say? What excuse does he have? The you in my head told me to do it? Yeah right.
Casey does the only sensible thing and turns to run.
Casey Jr?
Uncle Tello!?
What's happening now?
The other you is after me!
Oh. Well. Better run fast.
Casey turns on the speed, sprinting down the corridor and toward the only exit he knows, Donnie hot on his trail.
Why is every younger version of you so scary!?
Oh please, there's no way that scrawny, barely pubescent mess is scary. Have you ever heard his voice crack?
...Well, yeah...
See? Hilarious. And we didn't even have to pull up my browser history.
Okay, but none of this helped us fix anything.
Ah well. One problem at a time.
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solargeist · 3 months
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i keep mistaking some of ur kidxelqua art for ur grian art so i have to stop and read the captions/tags every time 😭😭 is there a fundamental difference im missing that would make it any easier
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hi !!!!!!! no i understand it can be pretty confusing !! its pretty messy on my blog ahahah i'll try to explain them and their place in the AU
All the kid drawings are Xelqua ! Originally it was Grian, but as the character Xelqua developed, I changed it to him. When people send requests for kid Grian, i'm drawing Xelqua, as that is the AU.
This isn't 100% accurate as I forget to do it, but Grian and Xelqua part their hair differently, kid Xelqua does too. Xelqua's hair is always a bit longer. (Grian got a haircut when he joined the Watchers, thats why his hair parts different now in evoAU and HC, he just kept it shorter ! Xelqua used to wear his hair in a ponytail during his time with the Watchers.)
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The reason why i say they're "technically the same" is bc Xelqua is just another Grian from a different timeline, he just has a different name. Xelqua only exists because this one Grian joined the Watchers, new possibilités opened new timelines, ones where he died, ones where he's a Listener instead, or ran away to different servers, or stayed. Xelqua is the only one to have reached Sainthood.
Because of this, Xelqua can hop around timelines, he usually just bugs other versions of himself, helping them, giving them tnt. He finds This Grian during s8 of HC, bugging him through the boatem void, briefly possessing him later, but hey ! water under the bridge !
Xelqua's timeline doesn't exist anymore after becoming That, but by becoming That he has essentially rewritten history in other timelines, solidifying himself as a saint of destruction, a destroyer, this is what the Watchers know him as, this is what evo Grian knew him as, even if Grian caused it--It already happened--Xelqua has always been here. (It makes Grian's head hurts when Xelqua explains this to him.)
Basically: Grian set off a chain reaction when he joined the Watchers, and that opened new universes, and in doing that, Xelqua is made.
Xelqua is powerful, but also very lonely and has a lot wrong with him, which is expected he spent many years with the Watchers. Xelqua can mimic any version of Grian he wants, but if he stays in that form for too long, he'll start to forget himself and instead think "Xelqua" is a patron, rather than himself. This is why kid Xelqua will usually praise the Saint Xelqua and be proud of his own name, he just doesn't know ! It takes a little while to remember himself and change back. This also happens in high stress, (bc of course it does, i love when a character loses control of their powers hahaha,) the memory is much worse if it happens from stress. You can't talk kid Xelqua out of this, it'll stress him out further and you'll just have a little god child throwing a temper tantrum then, never a good idea.
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After s8 in HC EvoAU, Xelqua hangs around, popping up sometimes in s9, mostly in his adult watcher self. They don't get along too well at first, Xelqua has a little bit of bitterness over Grian having such a fun life, all these friends, needed, wanted..... But whatever ! Xisuma doesn't know how he keeps getting in, but Xelqua has been on good behaviour, so...... Shrug... Just let him visit sometimes....
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Xelqua's version of the Watchers are gone, the unfortunate conséquences of becoming a destroyer, you kinda rip your own timeline apart. This, added with the fact that he is a cautionary tale in every other reality to Watchers, means if he tries to visit other versions of his Watcher family, they won't really know who he is, and just see something destructive and chaotic. If he wants to see Aether, he'll just... hop in a timeline and change himself into a kid and quickly forget what he's done. He's lonely, ok !!
Xelqua starts doing this kid bit on HC (late s9/early s10) too, he doesn't exactly mean to, but he does feel safe there. He eats Grian's food and takes over his couch and no one can get mad at him bc he is just a little kid--grian puts him in the corner. timeout. a few dead birds hit the roof as a result.
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melbatron5000 · 5 months
Text
Murder Board 2.0
Updated 9/18/24
Since I've figure a few things out, I need to re-do my Murder Board. New answers, new questions.
What I think I know:
Hints given out by NG are suspect at best. (I cannot blame him or anyone else on the cast or crew -- they spent A LOT of time and energy building this very meticulous puzzle game for us -- why would ANY of them give ANY of it away? That would ruin all the fun!)
Lots of the discontinuity of Season 2 can be explained by POV switches between characters. See here and here for more. I think the title/location cards are also probably POV Clues, that needs a closer look.
Crowley gave something to Aziraphale in his mouth when they kissed. It's the fly. Now, what else was in the fly besides Gabriel's memory? RECORDS. Incriminating records that are why the Metatron let Beelzebub and Gabriel go, but nailed Aziraphale. The Metatron knows Gabriel has those records, he doesn't know they got passed to Aziraphale.
Saraqael and Crowley and by proxy, Aziraphale are all working together. See here and here for more. That explains A. the tiny miracle blowing up into a 25 Lazarii miracle. It didn't. They had to cover for something else that did. B. Saraqael showing the archangels the book shop in 2019 in the spy hole. C. Crowley's spy turtle neck and where he went during Aziraphale's Job flashback. D. Why Saraqael helps him see the trial in Heaven. (Oh! Muriel's now in on it, too!)
Crowley's memory is fine, it's a red herring. It might mean something else, though. I think he is dissing Furfur, he is denying knowing Saraqael even after she gives him a reason to recognize her to hide that they are working together. He tells Jim he doesn't remember why they invented gravity, but that whole scene is from Aziraphale's perspective, so the conversation likely didn't actually go just like that.
Shax is on a mission besides Gabriel -- she's looking for whatever Aziraphale and Crowley are hiding. Gabriel is a side-mission.
The hand-washing comment from Crowley in the Resurrectionists minisode -- he tells DaVinci about helicopters in Good Omens the novel. It's just a thing he can do.
What is up with Maggie? Maggie's freaking Jesus 2.0. She's what Shax is looking for, and who Crowley, Aziraphale, and Saraqael are hiding. Also, where is God? God is busy being Maggie, that's where. That's why Crowley says "Oh God" before his speech in the final fifteen. He's bringing up what they're hiding, reminding Aziraphale that someone has to stay and keep an eye on Maggie. That's why he can't go. Now, how the FUCK did Jesus 2.0 wind up owning a record store she inherited from her family NEXT TO AN ANGEL?? (Ah, shit, now I'm doubting this one. Now I suspect it's Nina, and Maggie is Mary MAGdeline. Same questions still apply.)
SECRET SONGS??? Why are the songs secret?? I'm losing my mind, what is happening?? I think this is a message that A. Aziraphale and Crowley are okay, and B. We will absolutely be getting part 3 of 1941.
I still think the scenes might be out of order. Is it as simple as watching them in chronological order? Could be.
The Metatron is a naked man. i.e. he was originally HUMAN.
Aziraphale and Crowley are talking in subtext A LOT. Aziraphale's tells are easier to spot than Crowley's. He raises his eyebrows and does vocal bunny rabbit ears, says "um," and "ah." "Our Gabriel miracle," "The establishment in question," "Certainly on to something," "Haven't yet cracked the case." Crowley's tell seems to be being effusive. "Frozen peas," "You wouldn't be interested in love?" "Well, today is your lucky day!" "How do you know I didn't do it?"
We are missing the scenes that should mirror the Resurrectionists minisode. What we do have instead of mirrors to that are Crowley telling the demons they are out of order. He can tell time has been messed with.
There are two Crowleys. I think the head in the book shop is his way of keeping in touch while his twin is off doing things, and the red eyes are him, too. Now, why?? What do they need 2 Crowleys for?
What still needs answering:
The clocks jumping time. And why are the extras moving in double-time when we first arrive to Whickber street?
The weird hand in the 1941 photo.
Aziraphale's chair position being moved still doesn't make sense. Unless Crowley was talking to himself??
The extras behaving strangely.
Crowley's car being in the wrong spot on the road after Shax threatens him.
Weird sounds -- Aziraphale turns to look at a crashing sound when he returns from Edinburgh, to look at a car horn, the very loud clock in the final fifteen BUT ALSO when Jim says he will go out to the demons, nightingale singing when Crowley leaves in the FF.
I'm not sure that POV switches explain Crowley's sunglasses going from silver to black.
I don't know why Aziraphale went to Edinburgh, or why he stopped at the graveyard where Gabriel's statue is, or why he looked like he realized something important while he was there.
Why does Michael do the "nothing's in the box" thing with the matchbox? It's a petty specific action. Someone pointed out that Michael's nails look chewed and terrible, are we meant to stare at the matchbox while something else goes unnoticed? Well, duh. But what?
We most certainly did not get the whole scene where the Metatron is talking to Aziraphale. What else was said?
What did Crowley do during his ALL-NIGHT JAUNT in Heaven? Did he sneak around and steal something? Did he uncover something? Did they hurt him? I think he stole something.
What did Aziraphale do with his briefcase that he took to Edinburgh? We see it in the book shop from his POV, and Edinburgh is seen from Crowley's POV, so they both know it exists. And then it's gone.
Why does Gabriel prophecy with God's voice? IS it God's voice? It's a woman, is it Frances McDormand? It's hard to hear. When he remembers the beginning, I think it's God's voice. When he prophecies, it may be someone else. Frances McDormand has no credit in that episode.
Why the heck did Maggie and Nina go talk to Crowley while the Metatron was talking to Aziraphale? What they had to say wasn't important enough to leave Nina's shop during a rush, and I definitely don't think they derailed Crowley from what he needed to say to Aziraphale, though it might look at first as if they did. So what was that about? Were they trying to speak in husband-code to warn him about the Metatron?
When Shax stops Aziraphale for a ride, he says, "Oh, I really need to get to --" and then is cut off. He really needs to get to where? It's an easy assumption to think he means the book shop, or London. But is that all he means? Or was he on his way somewhere else? And if it was just the book shop, what does he mean he's late? Late for what?
When Crowley leaves Heaven, he tells Saraqael and Muriel to come, too. But in the elevator, Michael and Uriel are there! When the fuck did they show up??
Why does Beelzebub tell Shax to attack the bookstore? Aren't they worried about Gabriel being harmed? And they know Hell is understaffed. Maybe that's why they command it? Because they know Shax won't be able to get many demons?
What about the Masons? It's such a specific thing for the pub owner to bring up, what is the meaning of it? And Maggie has a Mason symbol on her necklace. Did the Masons carve the statue of Gabriel? When did they see him?
The only narration we hear in the entire season is Aziraphale in the Resurrectionist flashback. I believe this is to throw us off the POV character switches all season. But still, why do we only hear him narrate 1 flashback? I think he's reading the diary to himself in the present day. That would explain the end, "And that was the last I was to see of Crowley for some time." He JUST heard the story of the jukebox from Maggie. And Gabriel appearing at the pub -- same city that statue is in. Of course he thought of something important from that diary entry! Now, what did he notice?
Is the Book of Life a real threat? We hear two stories about it, that it's real and that its ability to erase beings was something to scare the cherubs with, this is inconclusive. Crowley gets nervous after Beelzebub talks to him, but I think he's pissed that Heaven and Hell have taken an interest in them again, especially since they're trying to hide Nina!Jesus.
So many promo posters show Aziraphale, Crowley, and Jimbriel together, or symbols of them. Three feathers: two white, one black. Tea cup, cocoa mug, wine glass. The three of them. Not with Beelzebub, not with Muriel, the three of them. And all three of them have been Jesus-coded in some small way. No one else. Those three. What. Why. Are they the sacrifice required to bring about the new world? Why not Beez, then?
The whole collection of Maggie's album's from the Amazon X-ray are great, big CLUES.
A post that I didn't reblog pointed out that the record Aziraphale is listening to when Garbriel shows up is neither Shostakovich nor 21 minutes long. That seems important, but I'm not sure how. (The record is opposite when Crowley gives Aziraphale the fly containing records -- the actual symphony is, according to the original blog, one written by a rebel in contempt of his government. Do the records have to do with the rebellion and fall?)
What the heck does Furfur mean by "little monkey in the waistcoat?" How does that sound like Crowley?
Why does Furfur change the subject when Aziraphale asks where Gabriel and Beelzebub would like to go?
Why does Mrs. H say "for God's sake" two times in a row? No one says that on this show without a meaning.
Shax notices Crowley going to Heaven and makes an epiphany face.
Why is the end credit music for the ball French cafe music? French must be important. And the end credit music for The Hitchhiker is old timey and scratchy, then skips and becomes the same song in a newer, clearer style. Because they repeat the bullet catch trick in the modern day, perhaps?
I thought I heard that Crowley and Aziraphale are in the fly in the opening sequence, but nope. So why are they in a cave?
Why are there multiple elevators and multiple mountains in the opening sequence??? What the hell does that mean?? And multiple Edens?? All right, what's up??
I count at least two times Aziraphale glances right at the camera, probably more. Who is he looking at? Us? Is he looking at Crowley?Why??
When Aziraphale arrives back from Edinburgh, he asks how "everything is with -- mm." Crowley says "he was sleeping, I heard him singing." I don't think they mean Gabriel. At the cafe, Crowley says when Gabriel smites you, you've been smitten. Aziraphale says he isn't "you know who any longer." Again, I don't think he means Gabriel. Who are they hiding?
Repeating themes: (I am just realizing that these aren't just themes, they are all Clues!)
Beverages of all kinds -- tea for Aziraphale, wine or whiskey for Crowley, cocoa for Jim. Oh, and LAUDANUM. And coffee!
Time -- lots of clocks/mentions of time. Everyone notices the ticking clock during the Final Fifteen, but it's ticking loud when the demons attack the ball, too. Also, why is the first scene of Whickber street shown at high-speed? Is time sped up? Or something else?
Love/partnership/togetherness being stronger than separateness
Memories/forgetting/remembering
Payment -- money comes up in both the Resurrectionists minisode and the Flesh Eating Nazi Zombies minisode, but no one pays for anything in present. There is bartering, but no money. Both times money is brought up, it's Crowley using Aziraphale's money, and both times, it's to buy a life. It's funny, but I feel like there's a point to it.
Rising from the dead -- Job's kids (even though they weren't actually dead), bodies used for science, Nazi zombies, the Second Coming. I think this is all just hinting around Jesus -- sure, hinting around Jesus, who we were expecting to show up in Season 3, but she's already here. The hints indicate that she is already on Earth, not going to show up next season.
Unreliable narrators. Because we are seeing the whole show from various characters' points of view. Because of that, we can only see what they know, expect, believe, or understand, but also what they want us to see. We need to take the whole second season with a grain of salt.
Death in general -- but 8a., I'm a dirty pagan, why didn't I make this connection sooner, death always leads to REBIRTH, change, something totally new and 8b. there are tarot cards in the magic shop, and even if you're not a dirty pagan, the Death tarot card means transition, something must die before a new thing can be born. Hmm.
Morality and what is "good" and what is right
Recognition and identity and hiding one's identity. Ah! Probably at least partly because Maggie someone? is Jesus. How would you recognize them? (I think it's Nina now.)
Licenses, permits, permissions, rules, proof, evidence, what's allowed. All of the minisodes mention this, and it all gets mentioned again over and over. Because Heaven and Hell do have rules they have to follow. Which drives home my theory that Gabriel stole some very incriminating records from Heaven when he left, Crowley got hold of them and gave them to Aziraphale during the kiss, and now Aziraphale is going to nail them.
Colors. Lots of colors!! Job's kids are dressed in the colors of Nina, Maggie, and Aziraphale's shops. Jesus on the Resurrectionist Pub sign is in blue and red, blue and red crop up a lot in extra's clothing, as do yellow and red, Crowley colors. The Ladies of Camelot are in red and blue. Aziraphale says Earth will be a blue-green planet, Nina's shop is blue-green.
Horses. Horse statue, horse wine label, people saying "dark horse." The four horsemen again? I feel like they already had their ride, so what the hell? I think it's because season 2 is an echo of season 1, I THINK -- I have to check -- that horses appear or get mentioned when the horsemen have corresponding scenes in season 1.
Numbers. A lot of numbers get said. Does it matter, or am I overthinking?
Repeating words and phrases:
Technically
Properly
Isn't it just?
Too late
Funny old world
Not as such
Made for each other
EVERYWHERE
Obviously
Two shakes of a lamb's tail
Dark horse
What are you/am I? As opposed to WHO. Aziraphale asks in the Land of Uz, and Crowley asks Gabriel.
Are you sure? Quite sure.
The Marvelous Mr. Fell is described as marvelous in his mysterosity, Shax says the demons have dangerosity.
Mrs. H in 1941 says "for God's sake" twice in quick succession.
Schtum
Every day
Hints:
Powell and Pressburg films
The Crow Road
Catch 22
The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents, Terry Pratchett in general
Jane Austin
Book Good Omens
Season 1 Good Omens
The titles of episodes, minisodes, places, etc. 7a. The Arrival: a book and a movie, though the book seems far more relevant. And lovely. The Clue: a movie. Companion to Owls: a line from a Bible story. I Know Where I'm Going: a movie. The Resurrectionists: two novels, each called The Resurrectionist, singular. Both look unhinged. The Hitchhiker: a Twilight Zone episode. Nazi Zombie Flesheaters: Literally no other reference. ?? Nazi Zombies do appear in a LOT of movies, comics, and video games, usually as a dark joke. The Ball: a video game. Irrelevant? It's a puzzle-based game, so maybe not. Every Day: a song AND a movie. Some themes repeat here: Puzzle games, being re-directed from one's path to find true love, death and being brought back to life in a gruesome and unpleasant way.
Objects that get a close-up/centering:
Starmaker's nebula book -- Nebula 231,080
Shax's compact mirror
Maggie's note
Shostakovich record
Tomatoes
The box
The Bentley
Eccles cakes
The bell
Head statue
The book Jim drops
Jukebox
Gabgriel's statue
Laudanum bottle
Phones in Edinburgh episode
"Very closed" sign
Broken whiskey bottles in 1941
Hourglass in Hell
Furfur's camera
Bullet catch in the magic shop
Instruction booklet for bullet catch gets 3 close ups -- because the bullet catch trick is that important, or because it happens 3 times? Both, I think.
Puppets
Dancers' silhouettes
Mr. Fell sign
The actual bullet
Angelic beings book
Photo evidence
Shax's shoes
"Surrender the angle" brick
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You know what fucks with me? Is it ever like actually fully explained how in the Deathly Hallows, Ron and Hermione get into the Chamber of Secrets by themselves. Is Parseltongue just a language people can learn now? Did they make Ron retroactively a Parselmouth too? Or is the chamber dumb enough that you can do the snake equivalent of meowing back at a cat at it and it'll go 'seems legit'
Another one for the 'what the heck happened to the writing in this book' pile maybe
Honestly, yes, that was so contrived, and for, like, no reason.
I mean, the explanation in the book is this:
“But how did you get in there?” he asked, staring from the fangs to Ron. “You need to speak Parseltongue!” Ron made a horrible strangled hissing noise. “It’s what you did to open the locket,” he told Harry apologetically. “I had to have a few goes to get it right, but,” he shrugged modestly, “we got there in the end.”
(DH, 623)
So, it's exactly a person meowing back at a cat, you're spot on with that description. It's so bad Harry doesn't actually recognize it as words in Parsletongue the way he always does, because Ron isn't speaking it! He isn't actually saying anything, just hissing randomly!
Which makes it bizarre the chamber actually opened to him like this. Seems like either loose security, some contrived magic helping Ron out or he was very lucky. Honestly, I prefer to believe he got the hissing lucky that one time, it seems more probable than the other options.
JKR did state in an interview Dumbledore learned Parsletongue, or at least, knew to understand it when spoken to him, but I don't treat it as canon. It doesn't make sense with everything we know about Parseltongue as a magical language, the way speakers of it just hear it as English, Harry has to strain for a moment to realize it's a different language (he can tell in the memories in book 6 if he listens carefully). Also, Dumbledore seems to me in these memories he's showing Harry like he doesn't understand the Parsletongue. And as I take the books' texts over the interviews when it comes to evidence, I don't believe he can and I chose to believe you can't learn Parsletongue and Ron got really lucky with one of his attempts to mimic Harry.
All in all, it seems she just decided you could learn Parsletongue in book 7 and ran with it. I don't even know why, since, like, it wasn't necessary? There were plenty of pages she could've replaced with Harry going down to the chamber considering how much time is spent on very little, well, anything. And if she really didn't want to add that scene it could've been an invisible scene like: "Harry opened the Chamber for Ron and Hermione to retrieve basilisk fangs,"
Like, I get wanting to give Ron a win, but he gets wins, he destroyed the locket and there are other ways to give him wins that don't include changing the very rules of magic.
Book 7 annoys me from an analysis standpoint, it makes theorizing harder instead of easier sometimes and it frustrates me so much more than the frankly bizarre writing choices. Although they bother me too, especially the pacing and structure of the book, but that's a whole rant on its own.
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herejusttosufferalong · 3 months
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I've started and deleted this sentence several times now and don't really know how to begin. So let's just go for it and say seriously WHAT THE FUCK has been the last 6 months!? My mind is a clusterfuck rn. I love L and N but they are seriously debilitating. Like I've been see-sawing between casual nonchalance about everything saying "haha this is great ride, what's next in store?" to just confused exasperation and emotional fatigue. I don't even know these people, and yet I am so fucking invested. This has never happened to me. They are like a drug. Seriously, whatever they are selling, I will buy 10 of everything, pump it into my veins. Why is my kink now seeing them get married, have kids and L be a stay-at-home daddy while N rules the fucking world?! N, alone, has me questioning my sexuality. Then I remember L is there, and I go oh yeah him too. Them is my sexuality. It's so messy. Anyway, now to the point of this. I had some flashbacks while watching L's Loewe Vogue video today. Watching his groomer give him a lovely face and head massage instantly transported me to Ireland with the infamous forehead stroke. Honestly, imo, the biggest turning point of the whole tour. So much happened before this time, but I really do think this moment was critical. I will outline why.
Obviously, Ireland was a massive deal for N. The excitement of getting back home and meeting family and friends, the amazing reception, it was special. She talked ad nauseam about her mum meeting L and honestly all I could think was when has anyone been excited/nervous about their parents meeting just a friend? You feel that certain way because you're wanting approval, you're wanting them to feel the same way you do about that person and welcome them into the family, as it were. I've never felt that way with friends, but I had done with my boyfriend (now husband). But maybe that's just me? L didn't seem as caught up in it, like almost trying to downplay a lot of her ott excitement. I also noticed that they were less touchy feely overall compared to earlier on in the trip, which was so unhinged honestly, I didn't know what to do with myself. But then came the moment. I don't think enough people have broken this moment down. So the interviewer asks the question, that's been asked oh so many times, "was it easier or harder to do the intimacy scenes with a friend?" And N looks at L and thinks to herself, he has a hair out of place on his forehead, I'm going to reach out and stroke his forehead right in the middle of this god damn interview. Not once, but a few times, like her little hand was built to stroke that man's face. Now, tbf, she does ask permission but also tbf her hand is already at his face before he can answer a whispered, guttural, "mhmm". He leans in, we loose L for a bit there, then he comes back saying "ok" like you probably got that hair now, think we should stop now. And her going into 'mother' mode telling him to turn his head, good boy. And his little worried face when it's over. And them talking about how N just can't stop picking hairs off people on set. Mmm ok. If they were in Regency outfits, I would be expecting a mirror scene next up. But you might say to me, well shit like this has happened countless times, it's just another thing. Well, I say no, this time was different. They both knew they had crossed a line, publicly, her initiation, his reaction. Because they were strange as hell at the London premiere. He avoided her gaze. She visibly stopped herself from touching him. One occasion, I saw her reach out to his arm or back, and she looked behind him (I think where their teams were?), and immediately pulled her arm back. The first moment she was asked about people shipping Lukola she had a pre-prepared speech ready to go to explain the head stroke. It was forced. A lot of what she said seemed so rehearsed, and although, I'm certain N does think a lot about what she is going to say in interviews, usually she is very natural about it and let's it flow. That lady was stressed and making a point that L is just a 'bud'. The lady doth protest to much, methinks. She's seen everything we've typed about her and L's behaviour during the tour, so why start over-explaining and defending behaviour now? She was STRESSED. That was the overt, obvious, stop yourself type of behaviour, and yet we still saw SOME of that unconscious stuff seep through, like him searching for her hand, her looking up at him like a God, her stroking his thumb with hers while holding hands (seriously, why was that SO intimate to me?). Point being, you can't fake that stuff, the repression and release. The unconscious behaviour. They knew something was rumbling. Or at least, N did. My opinion is that they have not acted on those rumblings, because if they had, it would be OVER. Electric. Power surge. Goodnight. Pack your bags and goodbye. We might not even exist anymore, tbh. But I shall wait over here and keep eating all the crumbs I can get. (I am sooo sorry about the length of whatever this is, thank you much the same, it was so nice to vent).
OKay but like I kinda fuckin love you anon...
I had the biggest smile on my face reading this.
There is so much to unpack here. We will have to chat sometime.
LOVE x
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drdemonprince · 5 months
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also a good-faith question: what do i tell some of my friends who are terrified of the collapse of the current system for like, survival reasons? like in ways that mutual aid and community support can't really help.
i was trying to explain all this stuff to my friend the other day who is on government support and needs a lot of intensive, expensive medical intervention to live, and she accused me of being willing to sacrifice disabled people for the sake of ideological purity but like, i wasn't saying she doesn't deserve to live, but that she doesn't deserve to live more than palestinians do? and that she also doesn't deserve to specifically live on stolen land. and like, there are palestinians who also could really use those medical treatments that she has the privilege of accessing, why does she deserve them more?
she said she can't afford to not care about the election results because if anything happens to the aca or medicaid, or if anything happens to the medical supply chains, then she's fucked. like, yeah, but same goes for all these people our country is oppressing??
i feel like i just didn't explain this well and i want to give her some other stuff to read.
Great question! I think when people believe that all social care systems will collapse without the government, they are buying into a very colonialist idea that human beings are at their most basic level selfish and irresponsible and won't care for their communities. This is not the case! Thousands of years of human history prove this not to be the case, and so do the behaviors of humans right now during moments of crisis.
Look to the people of Gaza -- they are not leaving their disabled behind. People are sacrificing all that they have to care for their elderly relatives, neighbors, and friends. The only reason that disabled people in Gaza are dying is because the region is being deliberately deprived of resources by Israel. If aid were let in and the Palestinian people were free, they would feed their hungry, treat their sick, supply insulin, teach children, and perform everything that we currently in the US rely upon the government to supply.
Another example of this can be found in how humans respond to natural disasters. Rebecca Solnit's book A Paradise Built in Hell is a beautiful read on this, following numerous real-life disasters across the globe. In every case, people did not riot and pillage or dissolve into violence--- they formed stable encampments, doctors and pharmacists worked their jobs without pay, cooks made food without expecting a wage, everyone pooled their resources and looked after one another.
We also see examples of this when other governments have fallen -- and all governments eventually do! When a nation-state ends, life doesn't end. People keep going to work to make the medicine and put on the leg casts and wash physically disabled people's bodies and make the food. People WANT to feel useful, helpful, included, and looked after, and they will do these things without being forced to by an authoritarian power structure. We see this in the campus encampments and the incredible outpouring of generosity they are experiencing too.
It is quite common for a person to mistakenly believe that the government is all that is keeping our social order working, and that we are all just one moment away from violent chaos and deprivation without it. But that really isn't true. Even without the government, we will still have the *people* who understand how food production and logistics work, the *people* who research and test the drugs, the *people* who watch the children and nurse the elders and fix the roads and butcher chickens.
Without the alienating, exploitative economic structure we currently have, it would actually be EASIER and more efficient for us to take care of one another with these skills, because our time wouldnt be wasted on bullshit jobs that don't contribute to society.
There are lots of great readings about all of this on the Anarchist Library, but I recommend starting with David Graeber's books! Bullshit Jobs, then Debt the first 5000 Years, then Utopia of Rules, then Dawn of Everything. Bullshit Jobs is the easiest read.
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funnyburneracct · 9 months
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Hi, I'm Xiao/burningrqs. this post is going to be long. Posting this from a burner so that it doesn't go down the drain when we deactivate.
But essentially, this is an apology to the radqueer community for multiple different things. I'm going to do my best to type this out as well as possible, and I apologize if I miss anything or word things poorly. I am going to explain myself to the best of my abilities, but please keep in mind that my explanations do not excuse my actions by any means.
Post under the cut.
for those who don't want to read it though, TL;DR: I was a complete asshole and I'm genuinely very sorry about it.
So, I want to start off by apologizing in general for the "burning radqueers" thing. Not only was it just not funny, but it was also really weird. I know damn well that if I saw someone pop up with a "burningmogais" blog or something, I would be pissed. So I don't know what made me think that running burningradqueers was a good idea in any sense.
My rude and dehumanizing comments did not help. Regardless of how I view people, what disorders I have, or how symptoms present themselves, it was disgusting of me to act as though I can't be held accountable for my cruelty towards others.
The targeted posts were even worse, and allowing people to just pick a random blog to "burn" was teetering on harassment. It put the user in front of so many people who clearly did not have good intentions towards them, and inherently put the user being "burnt" in danger. I wish I noticed that fact sooner. Even if I disagreed with people or didn't like them for whatever reason, I still should not have felt as though I had the right to post stuff like that.
Adding onto that, I should have never used my ASPD as an excuse for anything. I tend to get defensive when I feel insulted, which is what happened, and I decided to bite back despite being in the wrong. I acted impulsively and out of pure anger, and then tried to defend it, which I shouldn't have. When saying the kinds of things I did, I am open to criticism whether I like that fact or not, and trying to act as though I am immune to that criticism because of a disorder was disgusting on my part.
Another thing, somewhat on a similar note, is that an apology is owed for my hostility in general. Every time it was even lightly suggested I was wrong, I seemed to lash out and get angry. This really just comes down to me needing to learn to admit my wrongs. I should not have made my inability to understand my wrongdoings anyone else's problem.
Then there's also the things I said when I lashed out before deciding to drop burningradqueers entirely. I don't fully remember all of what I said as the event happened during an episode (this does not excuse my words at all by the way. regardless of my state at the time, what I said wasn't okay and should not be excused) and the posts have since been deleted. But, I do remember at one point making harassment out to be a competition of sorts when someone was simply trying to calmly explain to my why the namedropping was not a good move. I can't for the life of me remember why I did that, but I am very sorry about it. A lot of people in the radqueer community have been harassed (and likely do still get harassed constantly), and for me to act like I am the only victim of harassment was wrong on multiple levels.
I'm sure there was a lot of bad stuff I said during that episode, but as I said, I do not remember most of it. I'm sorry that I can't apologize for the specific things I said, but I am apologizing for the situation as a whole.
The entire thing started over me not being able to handle much deserved criticism, and I stood "my ground" despite having absolutely no ground to stand on.
I started burningradqueers over baseless hatred. I didn't know why I was supposed to hate radqueers, or what I was even really hating. I joined the anti community thinking that it is much easier to just move with the pack and hate what everyone else seems to hate, but hatred really isn't that easy. It's exhausting. And realizing how much the anti community really wouldn't want me if I was honest about things made me realize that. Realizing that there are so many antis who would rather see us suffer forever due to dysphoria than see us live happily after getting amputations was rough, and honestly kinda gave me a taste of what radqueers have to deal with every single day, and it felt horrible.
Without realizing it, I managed to do so much damage to a community full of people who deal with exactly the same things I do, a community that is mostly traumatized and mentally ill people who are just trying to get by. Not even just that, but genuinely just people trying to exist and be honest about themselves.
It is not my place to dictate what is and isn't valid in terms of someone's personal identity, and even more, it's not okay for me to treat a whole community like garbage just because I didn't understand it.
Again, I do not want my actions to be excused. I treated people horribly and was a total dick, but I hope that me apologizing can at least make some of you feel better about how I behaved.
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lavathein · 11 months
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Why is Sylvie angry?
I want to elaborate on this point a little bit, as some people either don't quite understand or are a confused by the plot.
Read more about the relationship between Sylvie and Loki here: sylki meta
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"TVA is in danger"
If TVA is in danger, then literally EVERYTHING is in danger. TVA cannot be destroyed or simply abandoned, because the Multiverse will begin to self-destruct. Time Loom is overloaded with too many branches. Previously, they were simply cut off, but now everyone finally understands that this is wrong and we need to find another way.
By the way, it is very interesting that the organisation that used to destroy everything can now become the biggest defender.
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Loki Time Slipping to the future and saw that the situation is getting worse, there is complete Chaos in TVA, the Loom is overloaded, and the Evacuation is taking place.
They have very little time to deal with this problem. Loki is interested in this, because if this is not done, then everything, everyone will come to an end.
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Sylvie did not see all this and does not even imagine that such consequences could be. She had a terrible life to live and TVA was to blame. From her point of view, it was just a terrible organisation that had a dictator and he was the only one to blame for all the problems.
She killed HWR and dismissed Timeline. It's really free will, so everyone can do whatever they want, she can do whatever she wants. Has she been living on Timeline for a while and is everything okay? Yeah. Nothing terrible is happening. (The time difference from TVA makes itself felt)
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And then Loki appears. Their last meeting was difficult, neither of them understands why, each of them made this choice. They also have a time difference. Let me remind you that Sylvie does not know what happened at TVA and she cannot know what happened to Loki. They are both confused.
But she agrees to talk. The conversation is not going well. Sylvie concludes that Loki is worried about the TVA. This immediately creates a barrier between them because she had been hoping that the TVA was a thing of the past, that it was all behind them. However, it turns out that it's not, and this fear and threat are still present.
Loki focuses on TVA because he was pushed away. It's always easier for him to avoid a difficult topic, and the TVA problem is a real threat and he can't ignore it either.
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Sylvie does not back down as soon as she learns that the branches are going to be pruned. She helps and even takes the step to come to TVA. She's seen Loki and Mobius stop these Minutemens, so that gives her a little bit of confidence… BUT! It was a failure and many branches were pruned. She is very hurt by this and angry that what she fought against is coming back.
Again, she does not see the danger that Loki was about to tell her about. She has just witnessed the TVA doing what they have always done. This cannot inspire confidence or a desire to be in this place.
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But this situation does not give her peace of mind. So she takes another step.
I think she was following Ravonna, because she heard in the final ep2 that they were searching for her. Again, let me remind you that Sylvie does not know that Ravonna is not an ally at the moment.
When she finds Victor Timeley, she sees that Loki is going to take him to TVA. She interprets this in her own way and becomes very angry.
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From her point of view, the situation is as follows: Ravonna, Loki, and Mobius are working together. That is, she thinks they have a plan and want to bring He Who Remains back to TVA. She is very annoyed by this, she does not understand what is happening at all. Loki tries to explain, but using "TVA is in danger" only makes her angrier.
Let me remind you that even Loki was not happy with the idea of taking Viktor to TVA, but he understands that there is No Choice.
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When Sylvie accuses Loki of collaborating with Ravonna, Loki looks very confused and says openly that isn`t the case. Sylvie thinks about it.
I also note the fact that none of them attack each other. Loki shields Victor because he believes that Sylvie will not harm him (Loki) - and he is right, she doesn't.
But no one will back down, so you have to get out of this situation, but she doesn't like to do it and it's clearly visible:
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Later, she finds everyone. She overhears their entire dialogue and finally realises that Ravonna is not an ally. Mobius also tells her that Victor needed at TVA because It`s in danger. She uses magic in time to rescue the situation.
She doesn't kill Viktor. Loki did not interfere at this point and trusted her to decide for herself. Let me remind you that a lot depends on it now, but he still makes no attempt to stop her.
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These are the first steps towards trust and understanding of each other's actions. But it's a very good example of what happens when, instead of talking, people start to get angry or silent. This leads to complete misunderstanding and hurt.
This is a very real and live conflict. They could have avoided a lot of this if they had talked, but there are many things that get in the way, and the global threat is taking over.
They are growing, and I like that. I love watching deep stories. The characters have to have a path to reach some purpose, to learn about yourself.
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under-lore · 1 year
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It was strange to me that in-universe monsters who saw humans can't recognize frisk by apparence in the genocide route
Is there any explanation of that?
I get that probably is a reference about chara being soulless (since they definitely are with you in that route) and that the player is becoming a like Flowey but in-universe that's weird
Indeed, it is about Chara.
In all parts of the genocide route, there is a certain recurring theme regarding the way some monsters happen to describe Frisk. Even mentioning it as inhuman-like or failing to easily recognise them as such.
However, those instances are not so much tied to Frisk themself, but rather to the way their body is handled and behaves, which contrasts with what those monsters expect of a normal human behavior.
To be exact, the thing that makes monsters react that way is seeing Chara in control of Frisk's body in opposition to just Frisk themself (and the player, of course.) as Chara does not get so assertive in controlling Frisk in other routes.
For instance, Sans sees Chara controlling Frisk near the lamp. Papyrus sees it when Chara walks Frisk straight through the puzzles, Chara is in control when approaching Asgore, etc...
Papyrus is the one monster that actually elaborates just a little bit more in what seems to feel so wrong with the way Frisk's body is moving when Chara controls it :
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He describes it as "shambling about".
As Chara was only just very recently brought back to life by Frisk's side, it actually seems quite reasonable that Chara would not be very used to controlling Frisk's body yet. As such, their movements would appear to be somewhat sluggish, likely dragging their feet or with larger heavier steps. A way to walk that, although easier to control for Chara, simply looks really odd for say, the monsters.
The game only gives vague details on what the differences are depending on who controls the body, but those are at least noticeable enough to truly stand out.
They certainly look human, but the way they act does not feel very human or very, say, very "organic". To an outside observer, it just doesn't look right compared to how Frisk trods around when in full control of their own body.
In short, they just look a little bit weird and not all that human-like in a maybe even somewhat creepy manner. This sentence sums it up pretty well.
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As Sans put it, this description the game has implicitely made of it looks almost like something that's pretending to be human. Which seems to explain the strange lines in which monsters hesitate regarding Frisk's nature.
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If the concept is still difficult to grasp, you could potentially compare it to the way Kris moves at the end of the Deltarune chapters. While the situation is not quite the same between the two games, the way Kris moves in those cutscenes also kinda feels wrong, shambling about in a description not so different from the one Papyrus made.
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There is also another really clever side to this, the plural community, who reports experiences of bodysharing in real life, also claims that the other identities usually struggle to move the body on their own at first.
As the number of similarities between NarraChara and a plural system is already large enough by itself to suspect an intentional inspiration on Toby's part, It wouldn't be surprising for Papyrus' words here to have been a specific reference to that detail. In that case, Toby would have done his homework quite well.
Of course, there are plenty of other reasons to make those comments about Frisk's inhuman vibe be as specific as they are in the game, such as foreshadowing or potential hints at Chara's situation like you brought up. But those are out of the scope of the ask. From an in-world perspective, the main thing that causes this change appears to be tied to the times where Chara has control of the body.
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usernamesarehard1 · 4 months
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I feel like we don't talk enough about Call's backstory. I mean, it was really tragic and set the stage for all of his emotional turmoil throughout the series.
He lives in a town where his dad is considered crazy/insane/etc, and so everyone assumes that Call is crazy too or that Alastair is causing some kind of harm to him.
Adults and children alike hate him solely because they don't understand him. He is literally physically and verbally attacked and beaten constantly by his classmates for being disabled and for being "weird", and the teachers do nothing about it. Like he actually canoncially experiences constant abuse
And then he gets home and he can't even really open up to his dad, the ONLY person in his life, because Alastair is so emotionally closed off due to his own traumas. And then he has to worry about Alastair instead of worrying about himself.
Like, Call was literally traumatized and thought that he was an awful person because everyone told him he was and physically punished him for his existence.
And I am in no way an expert on any psychological disorders but when I have read about the basics of certain ones, it would not surprise me if Call would be diagnosed with some of them irl. Like when I was researching "quiet bpd" at one point it sounded just like Call to me. He has no sense of person identity and tears himself down inside thinking he is a terrible person, while simultaneously going back and forth between putting his friends on a pedestal and distrusting them entirely. And we see in the books how he is very clingy to Aaron and Tamara, especially Aaron, and has to use them as a safety net for himself. And how he is just constantly terrified of abandonment, especially by Aaron and Tamara. And how he isolated himself so much and struggles to process or express his emotions.
And when I read a bit about ODD (oppositional defiance disorder) I sounded similar to Call. Like, Call does seem to have a distrust for and rejection of authority in the beginning of the series, which makes sense because the authority in his life (teachers, etc) only put him down for struggling. It isn't until he realizes Rufus has his best interests at heart (most of the time) that be begins to trust him, but he is still very wary of the other Masters and Assembly members. And from what I have read ODD tends to primarily affect children and becomes easier to move past as they get older so Call slowly becoming more trusting of authority over the course of the books makes sense.
(Sorry if I didn't explain those things well, it's very indepth in my brain but hard to put into words)
Obviously these two diagnoses are very broad spectrums but it would not surprise me if Call feel somewhere on them.
And then of course Call obviously has social anxiety and depression in the books. And it would not surprise me if he had some sort of PTSD going into the Magisterium based on his upbringing. And I have seen a few people say that his Evil Overlord List could be a sign of a specific type of OCD.
Like, Call was a KID. This was the only world he ever knew. In his most impressionable years he knew nothing but hate from people outside his family and very limited emotional support or connection inside his family.
Again, I'm no expert on any of these things. I just have basic info, but when I did learn immediately made me think of Call. Tbh I feel anxious about posting this because I'm terrified I have something wrong here or that i am misremembering something. I just wanted to share the connections my brain made.
I really wish the books had more about Call's friendship with Aaron and Tamara helping all of them to start heal through each other's comfort since none of them ever really had that emotional support prior to each other.
And tbh I'm kinda surprised Rufus didn't notice a lot of what was going on with Call. I really wish the books had delved into that more rather than having Rufus get mad at Call for his trauma responses.
Also, what happens when Call goes home during the summer (especially when Aaron wasn't there)? Was he attacked again? Was he verbally harassed again? Did he return to the Magisterium with bruises or anything? The books did say that he would often have injures from the attacks by his classmates (I remember them mentioning a black eye, split lip, and bandaged arm in one flashback).
I have just been thinking about it a lot recently.
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