#it's just really funny how so many people defending the game end up just conceding that a lot of aspects of it were unforgivably bad

[queernobi]

There's always this thing among fans of longstanding video game franchises like the Legend of Zelda where people have to insist that the older title people didn't like was actually quite good, and it's been really funny to see people try to do this with Skyward Sword despite it aging like milk.

Any video you see trying to do a serious retrospective has to be like, "Yeah, the controls were bad, and the bosses were a bit repetitive, and most of the dungeons weren't that interesting, and the story was poorly paced, but it's really a good game!" like please. Please stop trying to force this.

[retvenkos]

Hello again :) 💌 for Gwen Stacy (spiderverse), John Watson (Sherlock bbc), and Duckie Dale (pretty in pink)?

alright, my first instinct is a fake dating scenario for duckie dale because it has a lot of potential. i actually think it starts because someone is teasing you about not having a date, and you defend yourself, saying you actually are dating someone. and when they do ask you, you try to do the whole “it’s none of your business,” but that doesn’t work so you eventually just blurt out that it’s duckie. whoever you’re talking to is unimpressed. he’s had a crush on andie since inception. you say yeah, but a while ago you started dating to make andie jealous, and he fell in love with you, instead. it’s a complete lie, and some amazing foreshadowing for your relationship, and whoever you’re talking to is like “alright.” and you think that will be the end of it. but, the next day at school, you meet up with andie and duckie, and he gives you an exaggerated kiss on the cheek. you push him off with a confused look on your face,  and he feigns hurt. “but i thought we were dating, (n/n)!” and you’re groaning in realization, but duckie isn’t letting it go. “you know, i was surprised when i heard that the whole school knew about our fake dating scheme, seeing as i was just as unaware as them. next time you decide we’re dating, you should really call me so we can get our story straight, sweetheart.” and now that you are thoroughly regretting choosing duckie of all people, the person you were originally talking to walks by with a smug smile because they clearly know they’ve caught you in your lie. but you won’t back down, so you grab duckie’s hand in yours in pointedly place it on the table. andie laughs, and duckie is making yet another cheeky comment, but you’ve decided you will go down with this ship. ofc, this trope involves the two of you going on a lot of double dates with andie and blaine, trying your hardest to make it look like you actually are dating, and along the way, duckie catches feelings. now he’s in a conundrum, because this is all some game for you, but he actually likes you! what is he going to do now? andie finds out, and she tells duckie to tell you about his feelings. meanwhile, you are starting to think that this dating duckie thing isn’t bad. he’s always been there for you, hasn’t he? and who else would go along with such a crazy ploy? maybe you really do like duckie... as per the cliche, you end up confessing to each other (extra points if it’s at a school dance) and it’s vvv sweet.

now, because i only want the best for gwen stacy, we’re giving her a slow burn. just imagine, it’s after her peter has died, and she’s closed herself off from anyone and everyone, but you become partners in physics (so you can be rightfully impressed with how smart gwen is). at first, you don’t talk a lot, because it’s rather hard to talk to someone who doesn’t want to talk with you, but overtime you get her to open up the slightest bit, and you get the necessary confidence boost to continue to talk and make lame jokes, which never fails to make her laugh. and then you start seeing her in your other classes, and you sit next to her. she doesn’t seem to have too many friends, anymore, so there’s always room for you to slide in beside her in any classes you might have together. then, out of nowhere, she’s gone - she doesn’t show up to class for a few weeks, and you’re worried for her. what happened? when she comes back, her hair is shaved on one side, and she’s a lot more talkative and happy. you’re pleasantly surprised, and in physics a few weeks later, she invites you to come watch her play drums - she rejoined the band she was once a part of. and maybe it’s just the light playing tricks on you - but it looks like she’s blushing. you say of course, and it makes her whole world. because, dear reader, gwen had fallen for you. you were always so kind and gentle with her and it wa inevitable, really, that she would end up liking you. gwen’s type has always been the sweet and shy but surprising person - more gentle than they have any right to be, but also so very strong. no way in hell she’s going to tell you though - not yet, anyway. she’s still working through her fear of losing people. i definitely think that you find out she’s spider-woman before you get together. you think it’s insanely cool, but you also realize that she’s in danger all of the time, and she probably feels responsible for a lot of the losses she faces.... you comfort her, and i think that’s a turning point for your relationship. she just told you the most crazy, fantastical story she’s capable of, and your first instinct is to apologize for all she’s suffered. yep, she loves you. it’s not a week later that she tells you, and she’s a nervous, blushing mess. and you tell her that you’ve loved her for a long while, too. it’s a very tender moment, exactly what gwen deserves.

which only leaves enemies to lovers for john watson. now, this idea isn’t bad. it gives me a lot of johnlock vibes, and that’s one of my otps, so... i’m going to go out on a limb here and say your sherlock’s friend. i don’t know what you help him with on his cases, but he will sometimes consult you for some reason or another, and you’re “devil may care, illegal just means fun” vibe clashes with john immediately. and john rants about you for a good hour after the two of you meet, and sherlock is just like “they’re usually not that bad, they just like infuriating you.” and it’s the truth - messing with john watson becomes a favorite pastime of yours - especially when sherlock works with you, making up the most ridiculous stories and fake arguments to get john to self-destruct. but, as we all would guess, you grow to really like john watson. he’s an interesting character, that one - he has all the good traits that you like to think you no longer have. he’s kind and selfless and fairly sharp, even if sherlock insists otherwise. and he’s funny - at least, a lot better company than sherlock. and at some point, john saves you from something or another, and you’re touched, of course, and that night, you genuinely thank him, and it’s a really sweet moment. he concedes that he actually does like you - even if you are incredibly annoying and the bane of his existence - and you laugh, saying you really like him, too. “you’re pleasantly surprising, john watson.” and that’s the end of that, but it’s the start of a turning point for your relationship! now it’s more playful banter between the two of you that sherlock swears gives him a headache - even when you’re just thinking of the other. sherlock is also probably the person that clues both of you into the fact that you love each other, and both of you are very exasperated at sherlock, but well, there goes your confession! now that it’s all out, the two of you are a snarky couple that sherlock has to “endure,” despite caring for both of you very deeply. mrs. hudson takes some money from sherlock because she bet that the two of you were going to get together, and sherlock was dumb enough to not see it, earlier.

[harristops]

Yanno it’s really shitty for Ashlyn to always have so much hate in her mentions but also imagine how it is for ali to always see ash being torn down and overlooked… like ali sees first hand the blood, sweat and tears that ash puts in and alis been there for so many moments of disappointment and injury. Like ali has to see the person she loves fight through so much adversity and never get the credit she deserves. Ashlyn can’t even win save of the week or save a freaking PK without someone coming at her and saying she’s overrated or trash or some shit…. Im just tired of it and ali and ash deserve so much better. I wouldn’t blame them if they took a step back from SM because the ‘fans’ and trolls have just gotten out of hand, it’s so awful and it needs to stop

Honestly, I never even thought about how much it would affect AK. Like, Ash has learned to brush it off/block out the noise, etc., but I can't imagine how much anger and hurt AK feels watching her wife get torn apart over every little thing she does (and even things she doesn't do). Like to be the woman who stands beside Ash, day in and day out, watching as she throws everything she has into the game, from her body to her mind, and never get the recognition or appreciation from anyone, regardless of whether they're the federation or "fans". She's given the national teams (youth and senior combined) more than half her life, given everything to the Pride even when other players fail to show up or do the same, keeps her head down and doesn't complain or get mad (unless at herself), and she is grateful and humble in every opportunity she does get on the field.

I especially think back to 2016, when distance came into it and Ash was becoming lowkey concerning with how many depressing tweets and IG posts she would make, and I remember that one post AK retweeted which was like "you matter to me" or something after Ash posted that long post about her self-worth and mental health. She's always worn her heart on her sleeve and it's taken advantage of by so many people (again, the "give an inch, take a mile" phrase Ash mentioned really sticks with me here). She is so selfless and has a massive heart under her hard exterior, and people love to paint her to be this self-indulgent, vain, supervillain that is shit at soccer. Not to mention, Ash could barely celebrate her best season because those were the years AK was kicked off the roster and she put herself aside to help AK train, supported her coaching career, and picked her up (literally at times) to get her through every day. She wasn't the nicest person to Ash back then either, and I doubt Ash minded, because at the end of the day Ash cares so deeply about her family, about her relationships, that soccer takes a back seat for so much of it. She's said it so many times that this is her career, but it doesn't bleed into her family life. I feel gutted for her in every interview when she beats herself up with the "I've failed miserably" or the "I haven't been the best daughter/sister/friend" or even "I've disappointed a lot of people". She is so hard on herself and yet is still so kind to others. This is the same woman who's faced countless criticism, countless struggles from poverty to addiction to injuries to mental health challenges, and she still treats every day like a gift, not a burden.

I think the thing that gets me the most about this Ash slander is how no one has ever stood up for her. She's gotten all this hate, all of this criticism, but when AK was dropped from the team, she got support. When Hope said what she said, Carli spoke up for her. Whenever a teammate gets down in the dirt, Ash defends them. She spoke out against H*nkle and the homophobia. She defended AK when she was left off the roster (though more subtle and more professionally). Like she's always standing up for others, being the big guy for the little guy, and yet no one really extends the same thing back to her (except now AK, and again in a very professional way). Should Ash be #1? No, things happened and she got injured at the wrong time and it was all a mix of different things, but she made her peace with it. She doesn't tell the media that it's disrespectful she got snubbed - she instead supports the crap out of Alyssa/AD/Jane and wants them to succeed because she's a team player, not an individual player. She cares about them as humans and would do anything for them in that supporting role. You could genuinely not ask for a better teammate than Ash.

I don't know how AK does it, watching the woman she loves get bullied on social media and be cast aside from opportunities with no valid reason. Every achievement Ash has is overshadowed by rabid fans either "defending her" and making things worse by making her look out to be an untouchable God of some sort, or the anti-Ashlyn "fans" who are just out to replay that same clip of her conceded goal from that Romania game, or outright saying disgusting and nasty things to her (and tagging her?? Like why the fuck are you tagging them in it, what bullshit). Both ways it's terrible; the people defending her so violently only make her look worse and it only encourages people's hatred of her or disrespect of her actual ability.

It's so funny people weave all these storylines and narratives for her but Ash remains unbothered (at least publicly) and I think this irritates those morons into posting more frequently with the intent to grab her attention or get her to talk back (which she is far too professional and compassionate to do). It's a shitty situation all around, but it's truly depressing to watch her get taken apart when she's done absolutely nothing wrong to any of those people.

[twonewkidsonesouthpark]

Chapter 3: A Class Act

So let me get this straight; we moved in during the most intensive, town wide, elementary school LARP session the world has ever known, you’re all fighting over a goddamn TREE BRANCH, and all of you seem to think that me and my sister are the same person. Oh, and also boys, point for mom and dad, I guess. Have I covered all of the craziness happening here or am I missing something?

Lynnea knew she wasn’t going to get an answer -- Kyle seemed like a nice enough kid, besides the whole ‘quasi-abducting her under false assumptions’ thing, but Alyssa was the only person who she could really ever communicate with. Came with the twin territory, she supposed. Or just being raised in the same weird way.

“So? Will you join us?”

Part of Lynn wanted to say no, wanted to just go home and finish unpacking and not get involved in this mess… but Kyle sounded so damn hopeful and…

...when was the last time she ever got to have fun like this? As her, not her-pretending-to-be-Lyssie-pretending-to-be-the-same-person. And... well, dad DID tell them to make friends…

Fuck it. For once in their lives, she was doing something she wanted to do.

Lynnea nodded.

Kyle grinned, “Awesome! Okay, so first things first, you can choose from a few classes,” Kyle told her, leading her over to the well labeled shop, “You can be a ranger like Stan, a warrior, a mage, a healer… you can’t be a Bard unless you know how to play an instrument, that’s why Jimmy’s the only one.”

Well, that’s right out then unless being able to play a really shitty recorder counts. Go back to that healer class, can I heal AND hit things or is it just one or the other? She picked up the healer headband and the sword, holding them both out toward Kyle quisitively.

“Dude, that’s not the warrior armor,” Stan says. Lynn gave him a flat look, gesturing again to both, and hoping this wasn’t about to turn into a frustratingly stupid game of charades --

Kyle tilted his head, eyes going from the headband to the sword before something seemed to click, “Oh! You want to heal and hit shit?”

Ding ding, we have a winner!

Kyle looked contemplative, “We don’t really have a class for that, but… hm,” he tapped his fingers against his opposite arm, “I think we can manage that. Cartman’s got Butters as a Paladin, but he made that class human only, so we’d need to think up a different name for it. What do you call a healer who hits things?”

“A really bad healer?” Stan offers up.

“Ha ha, very funny.”

Lynn tapped him on the shoulder, helpfully showing him her phone screen with the wikipedia page for Cleric opened up on it, I think THIS is what you’re looking for.

Kyle read it, then nodded after a minute, “Yeah, we can totally swing that. It’s… ugh, it’s essentially the...” he mumbled something under his breath, “Class.”

Lynn blinked, then tilted her head, putting a hand up to cup behind her ear, Wanna run that one by me again, I think I just SERIOUSLY misheard you.

“Ugghhhh, Cartman called it the Jew class, alright?” Kyle said, with an exasperated roll of his eyes, “Cleric’s a way better name, though, so that’s what we’re going with.”

Wow. Ooookay then.

“Yeah,” Kyle sighed, clearly seeing the shock on her face, “Right, let’s get you geared up.”

It was a little surprising to see just how MUCH stuff the shop had accumulated, and how creative the boys had gotten with their homemade weapons. Well, if a zombie apocalypse ever hits, these guys are set. It was a little annoying to have to spend her allowance for her ‘staff,’ though. At least Kyle gave her the armor set for free, mostly because they had to pick and choose pieces from their already established classes, and helped her get the fake pointed ears on.

“Just don’t futz with ‘em too much, we tried gluing them on but well -- a couple peoples’ moms got mad,” he shrugs. Lynn dropped her hand from where she was playing with her hair, trying to get it to settle around the pointy appendages, “Okay, so, we’ve got your class, your equipment… oh, right, add me on facebook so you can stay in contact,” Kyle said, “It’s how I usually give orders, Cartman keeps trying to assassinate me every time I leave my yard,” he rolls his eyes.

Oh. Thaaaaaat was going to be a problem…

Kyle raised an eyebrow at Lynn as she fidgeted awkwardly, “Dude, what? I know you’ve got a phone, what’s the issue?” Well yeah, her parents learned that lesson that their while daughters would concede to share many things - a room, clothes, an identity - a phone would not be one of them. It had only taken a few fights for them to cave and get a second phone. But only one of them had the Facebook app downloaded, and that phone? Was in Alyssa’s possession at the moment.

Sighing, Lynn pulled her phone out of her pocket and handed it over to Kyle, who looked confused as he flipped through the screens, “...you don’t have Facebook?” He finally asked when he put two and two together.

Technically, no. But it’s not like I can explain that me and my twin sister have to share a facebook page that’s heavily monitored by our parents, sooo… Lynn took the phone back, opening up her contacts, and tapping the screen next to her parents’ cell numbers, “Ohhh. Overprotective parents?” Stan guessed.

Close enough, she nodded.

“W-well, we won’t t-t-tell if yyyyyou d-don’t,” Jimmy grinned. She gave him a flat look, and the grin dropped slightly, “S-ssorry. Sore sp-pot?” She shrugged, willing to let it slide. At least he apologized.

Then her phone wasn’t in her hands as Stan took it out of her grip, “Here. I’ll make you a Facebook page, that way your parents can’t get mad at you for doing it, right?”

I am pretty sure that is NOT how that works, Stan. But she didn’t try to grab it back, letting Stan fiddle with it.

“Dude, what do I put in for your name?” Stan asked, looking up at her, and Lynnea’s brain froze up. She couldn’t tell them her real name -- for a number of reasons, the current top of the list being they thought she was a guy.

“Well not his real name, obviously, if we don’t want his parents finding the page,” Kyle saves the day, “We do need to call you something, though. Unless you want to keep going by ‘New Kid’.”

Preferably not, but I can always change it later, right? She shrugged, motioning for the phone back. She’d send all the relevant people a friend request in a minute if they didn’t beat her to it, But first, let me take a selfie, she thought with an inward giggle as she held the camera up and snapped a picture. At least she didn’t feel too out of place as the friend requests flooded in -- it looked like all of the boys had their costumes on in their profile pics, at least for the moment.

It struck her, about then that, for the first time in possibly her whole life… she had friends. Friends that were hers, not hers and Lyssie’s. Lynn blinked rapidly -- she didn’t know MUCH about these guys, but crying in front of a bunch of boys probably wasn’t going to win her points. She shoved her phone in the pocket of her new robe, looking up at them.

So… now what?

‘Now what’ was apparently teaching her the rules of the game, and how to fight -- that one, at least, she already knew. She’d gotten into enough scuffles with Lyssie over their lives to know how to defend herself, at least. And that was without the solid, somewhat sharp metal rod she now had to hit people with. She also got the privilege of holding onto a slew of health and power ‘potions’ -- snacks. At least Kyle lent her a backpack for those.

“Now that you’re fully initiated into my army, I have your first task for you,” Kyle said, hopping back up into his throne once he felt she wouldn’t make a fucking fool out of herself, “The humans will stop at nothing to retrieve the stick, so we need to take it somewhere they won’t look. Stan, I want you and the New Kid to escort the Bard back to the Inn of the Giggling Donkey. Jimmy, I’m putting you in charge of guarding the stick. We’ll get our men set up inside to keep you safe.”

“Yes, Your Majesty!” Jimmy and Stan said.

Kyle grabbed the stick off the arm of his throne, handing it over to Stan, who took it with a firm nod, “Guard it with your lives. The Grand Fatass canNOT get his hands on it again,” Kyle said, “Now, go! Before they have time to regroup.”

“C’mon, New Kid, we’ll show you around town while we head to Jimmy’s -- er, the Inn,” Stan said, tucking the stick in his belt and heading toward the back door. Jimmy followed after him, pausing to shake mud and grass off the ends of his crutches before going inside. Lynn practically bounced along behind them.

Maybe this move wasn’t going to be so shitty after all.

[fmlfpl]

Lineup Lamentations - GW22

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week!

And for those Patreon subs who missed it we did a super late night Friday My Life episode last night. Get in there.

—

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Martin Kelly

IN: Brandon Williams

Doing a little puss move with two frees to save a couple doll hairs and floating the other. Guess I'm looking at Mane in for Kun so doing this buys me some more time.

Kelly I can't imagine will have a job when the window closes and with bad fixtures he's an easy sell. Like I would sell Rico instead? Laughable.

Baby Will have been eyeing up for a while now and while he might be dropped at any moment he's just a 4.0 who will slot in and the end of my bench at the worst case, and be a rotating decent option in the best case. I like his attacking intent and if slab is out then maybe they'll actually keep cleans.

GK:

Schmeichel (SOU)

Woodman legend. Get back in there. Schmike off the bench will feel like free points.

DEF:

Alexander-Arnold (tot)

Trent with a tough on paper fixture but it's still Trent always feels good with him going.

Lundstram (WHU)

Pointstram finally has a good fixture so hopefully the gameweek starts off well with some points from him in the early game. Will look at adding another SheffU defender or two in their good run coming up.

Pereira (SOU)

Ricardo finally got me points last week so that was a nice thing. Not really too sure about what this game will look like with Ndidi out...but Ricardo still feels like an okay start maybe will spike an attacking return..due?

Williams (NOR)

Finally is new friend baby who I will start with Norwich visiting.

Would be third game in a week for him and it would certainly be no surprise to see Young at this spot but meh backing the boy to keep his place. He's been actively good which is not something that can be said about many of his teammates.

MID:

Just three amigos for me this weekend in mid hopefully they're good lads.

Martial (NOR)

TonyM glove merchant with a good on paper fixture which means who knows what the fuck IRL. Nice rest for him should be back to his normal self solid hold here.

De Bruyne (avl)

Kevin has a dream fixture at Villa and hopefully will not be playing DM.

Salah (tot)

Mo will be up against a bus this weekend but has been looking good lately and no reason to expect that to change.

FWD:

Vardy (SOU)

Vardz still in the fuck. Whatever.

Maupay (eve)

Neal goddammit Neal such a tormenting guy he is. I'm gonna hold him and I'm going to be subject to his will. My body is ready.

Agüero (avl)

Team is rounded out with Kun the god. Will be sacrificing babes to the alter of Pep the bauld fraud hoping this guy is on the sheet. If so, yay. If not, not yay.

CAP:

Agüero (avl)

Kun. Got the week off...still believe he is first choice..so he gets the armband. It could be great...which would be fucking great...or it could be not great which would equate to more of the same for me this season.

Feel like this is the only shout for a cricket score on the menu this weekend so I'm backing Kun. Insert shrug emoji here.

—

ALON

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Kane and Stephens

IN: Calvert-Lewin and Sarr

I’m really pushing it close to the deadline here but I was having a panic morning of being indecisive again... Been a theme this season unfortunately...

Went back and forth with pod partner a bit on Slack and he lead me back to the source energy of Ismaïla Sarr who I’ve been wanting on my team since he got transferred to Watford and now I finally have him.

Bringing in two guys I really like and rate with enough money in the bank to go Kelly->Trent feels like I did something maybe good or at least maybe not bad.

Let’s go.

GK:

Ryan (eve)

My keeper is such a good lad donating a chunk of cash for every save this weekend you love to see it.

With that now I expect him to have double digit saves tomorrow at Goodison and maybe save a pen too. Conceding one to DCL along the way and everyone wins.

Come on Maty.

DEF:

van Dijk (tot)

Not really sure what this match is going to look like at all. I assume Spurs double-decker bus and trying to counter but we’ll see. If that ends up being the case then a clean is very real.

Söyüncü (SOU)

My guy from GW1 we’ve been through thick and thin together.

Home Soton just keep Ings out my lord please god keep Ingsy out.

Lundstram (WHU)

I still mostly think West Ham are bad and Moyesy’s Boys will be bad but there is a bit of a bounce in the air which is troubling.

Sheff U. should be able to do a job though and you’d expect them to easily win this fixture at this point with or without a bounce.

MID:

Sarr (bou)

New friend. Love it! Love him.

Was kind of popping off on the pod about his stats and stuff since Pearson came in and the eye-test absolutely follows.

Away to Eddie and the Howes come on you Hornets. Come on Sarr.

Maddison (SOU)

I guess he’s fine, we’re lead to believe that he’s fine in the press conferences so let’s go Maddo. Great pick for now.

But I am still thinking about ditching him for GWs 25-27.

Salah (tot)

Mo is great at football. And he loooooooooves playing Spurs.

De Bruyne (avl)

Kev plays his own little private game of Pep Roulette. Will heeee be at center back? Will he be at DM? Will he be at false 9? Will he be the furthest forward #8? No one knows... But City should destroy these and Kev will probably get some points no matter where he’s playing.

FWD:

Calvert-Lewin (BHA)

Against my keeper whatever doesn’t matter let’s go DCL.

Been high on him since the end of last season through the summer and then they bought Kean and I got rid... But now he’s back and nailed and looking good so I’m back in. Come on DCL tit me.

Vardy (SOU)

It’s funny that people got rid.

Jiménez (NEW)

Still waiting for my first Jimi points but home Newc oh baby it should come this week for suuuureeeeeeee dude.

CAP:

Jiménez (NEW)

Let’s do it.

It’s time.

He only has two double-digit hauls on the season (funny enough both vs. Man City) but I mean come on Newcastle are really really truly terrible and Wolves will want to bounce back after losing to Watford last week.

It’s time. Go on Jim.

[ask-ragnarok-travelers]

[ Outmatched ] [ HP AU ] [ Farona/Yune ]

So. This is random, but I had once spoken elsewhere about a potential Harry Potter Universe AU with my characters (when asked about the houses they would be in). I ran across that stuff today and thought, “I might like to write a scene or two from that, if just for kicks.” And so I did.

Thus, here’s some silly Farona/Yune fluff thing in an HP setting that I wrote spontaneously today (although someone did help motivate me to write it, so thank you!).

Title: Outmatched

Rating: PG // Mild fluff and bantering

Characters: Farona (OC), Yune Hiraze (OC)

Universe: Hogwarts AU

Notes: Just for fun! As much as I love the Ragnarok Online universe that they belong in, I also like thinking of AUs to adapt them to just for fun. Also, they are significantly younger in this AU, and you might notice something that seems... different about someone. : ) Hope you enjoy!

Fic is beneath the “Keep reading” cut!

----Outmatched---

The crowd in the quidditch pitch erupted into ear-splitting cheers as the winners of the match were announced in a loud, resounding boom that echoed through the stands of professors and students alike. Wizards and witches threw hats, scarves, and gloves into the air, the resounding celebration carrying through the entirety of the pitch.

A young woman dressed in red and gold robes sighed heavily, her pinkish-red hair angling downward as she looked at her feet with stormy aqua eyes. She ignored a few pats to her shoulder from fellow teammates wearing the same colors and their words of "good game" or "we did our best" and "we'll beat 'em next time". She tried to force a smile, but it ended up strained as she gripped her school-issued broom with a fist.

It was her fault. If she was a better keeper, Ravenclaw's chasers wouldn't have gotten so many quaffles right by her and through the hoops. And it wasn't even the distraction of the beaters---she had taken more than a few bludgers on before without becoming too worse for wear.

The truth was, she was just... inadequate. And maybe a little too hot-headed. After a few years of playing for the team already, she wondered what she was thinking in asking to take on the keeper's position. The former team keeper had to leave after graduating, but Farona didn't feel as though she fit into his shoes all that well, even though keeper was what she wanted to play from the very beginning. Frankly, she just made a better beater or chaser at the end of the day.

...When she wasn't getting fouled for aggressive behavior on the field, anyway.

This match really was her loss, though. There was no dancing around it. She had only made two saves and neither were spectacular. There was still a lot of work to be done if she really wanted to protect the goals from the opposing team. Gryffindor's current team line-up was great. She was the one holding them back at this point.

Though, oddly enough, no one else seemed that interested in playing keeper. She had discovered that rather quickly after she had asked for the position move from the team captain and found that there were no protests or challenges for the change whatsoever.

With a longer and heavier sigh, she shook her head, walking off the edge of the field and down underneath of the structured stands far above, where people were still cheering and sharing hearty and chipper congratulations. The end of her broom dragged behind her as she sauntered off past the pitch with slumped shoulders. She couldn't let this get her down and she knew that. She was just going to have to... practice harder. Maybe later she could come back down to the pitch and--

"Rough match, hm?"

Farona paused, looking up. There was a tall boy with messy, light brown hair standing just off to her right, sporting blue and black robes, accented in bronze. Seeing the colors alone was enough for her to swiftly look away with a pout on her lips.

"Now, now, Farona. Don't be like that." His chiding was light in tone, but she wasn't in the mood for his teasing.

Not after that bloody monumental stomping.

"I'm tired," she lied shortly, moving to walk right on by him. But without any invitation to do so, he came to walk with her. Frustrated, she stopped in her tracks, glaring up at his much taller form. "Yune, don't you have a house to go and celebrate with?"

His eyebrows raised a little over his light green eyes. "Celebrate? Come now. You know I don't really take part in these things."

She rolled her eyes.

"Really," he assured her once more. "I didn't come to the match to watch my house team play. I came for you."

At that, she did look up again. Seeing the soft smile on his features, she quickly looked away, a light flush tinging her cheeks pink. "So you came to see me fail at being a keeper," she muttered sourly.

"All things considered, you did not perform horrendously."

"Gee, thanks."

"But there are several points you could improve upon," he continued. "For instance, the first goal that was scored about three minutes in... you had the right idea, but your timing was just a little off. You need to anticipate the quaffle's arrival a little more. Do not lash out as soon as you see it."

Farona huffed, crossing her arms and giving him a withering stare. "Are you really going to give me a lecture about how bad I played right after my team lost the match?"

Yune blinked, raising his hands slightly. "Well, you want to stay as keeper for Gryffindor's team, do you not? I thought my input might be of some use to you. I paid close attention to what you were doing."

Farona gaped at him, her face flushing brighter at the notion that he had been watching her, specifically. What a...! Why did he always have to say weird stuff to her like that? It would have made more sense for him to be picking part his own team's moves and instructing them, instead!

She shifted on her feet, unbidden nerves crawling up. "You didn't even watch the rest of the match at all?"

"No," he confirmed all too brightly. "It was much more interesting to see how you handled the pressure of defending the goal posts."

"Well I'm glad I could entertain you," she snapped irritably.

"Always so hostile," he chuckled, fondly reaching out to pat her head---even as she tried to bat the gloved hand away. "I am not trying to make fun of you or berate you. You know that. But if you do not want to hear my observations, I will not force them on you."

He shrugged, still wearing a half-smile. Farona glanced at him for a moment before she exhaled through her nose. "...I don't understand why you don't just join the Ravenclaw team. You seem to know a heck of a lot about quidditch and how to play."

Yune gave a small, short laugh in response. "I have no desire to play. It is not my sort of game," he explained. "I much prefer---"

"Wizard's chess," she finished for him. "I know. You're really good at it."

"Undefeated," he corrected.

"Undefeated," she amended with a snort-like noise underneath her breath. He certainly wasn't short of any self-confidence, himself. "Yeah, that's great. But that doesn't mean that your tactics wouldn't help out your house team with quidditch matches if you offered them. Even just from the sidelines, if you don't want to play."

He was silent for a moment, then he reached out and tucked a stray lock of her hair behind her ear with a gentle brushing of fingers. "And what if the truth was that I simply wished to help you, instead?"

Farona's eyes broadened as the flush in her face reinstated itself and spread. Sputtering, her eyes darted around, unable to bring herself to face him. "S--Stop saying things like that!"

"Why?" he inquired innocently, rocking back on his heels. "Is it wrong to help friends and support them?"

"Well when you say it like that, it---it sounds like..." she trailed off, gesturing with her free hand at the air.

"Hm? Sounds like what?"

She lifted her gaze, his patient green eyes waiting for her response. "...Nothing," she said, picking up into a brisk-paced walk again.

He easily matched it, casually striding alongside her. "Are you heading back to the castle?"

"Maybe," she answered in a gruff tone.

Yune released a chuckle beneath his breath, which briefly stopped her in her tracks again as she glowered up at her senior, hands on her hips. "What's so funny about that?!"

He reached out to flick the edge of her nose. "You're going to go off and sulk, aren't you?" The flood of embarrassment in her face spoke for her. He read her like an open book---like he always did, ever since they met a few years back. But before she could sputter out a response or denial, he pressed a finger to her lips. "I have a better idea. Why don't we head to the great hall? I have a butterbeer or two left from the last Hogsmeade visit. And if you would like and are willing to listen, I can offer what I observed from the match. We can even head back here later if you would prefer a more hands-on approach."

His smile seemed to say that it wasn't a joke---not that she honestly thought Yune Hiraze would poke fun at her after such a dreadful outcome to a quidditch match. He wasn't vindictive like that. Farona considered the proposition wordlessly for a moment.

She may not have said so aloud, but she had planned to come back to the pitch to practice on her own. And even if Yune was something of a know-it-all and a brilliant student in Hogwarts, he never acted condescendingly toward her. He was almost unimaginably patient with her, sometimes. And yeah, maybe he did kind of tease her sometimes or mock-flirt with her to get a rise out of her, but...

He really did want to help. It was genuine. She could see that in his eyes, which shone with a sincere luster in the green depths.

"...Are you sure you don't have any other studying to do?"

"I'm well ahead of my studies," he assured her. "You will have my full attention."

...She figured as much.

With a lop-sided smile, Farona conceded with a short, but not displeased sigh. "Alright, fine. You think you can whip me into shape then?"

"You may not want to word it quite like that," he teased with a little swish of his wand into his open-gloved palm, amusement tinged in his voice.

Heat rushed into her face again. "You--you know what I mean!"

The two made their way back toward Hogwart's inviting silhouette in the distance, quipping back and forth animatedly.

Farona felt that her sullen mood had already begun to lift.

[gadgetsrevv]

Premier League predictions: Lawro v athletics legend Michael Johnson

In-form Leicester go to Anfield on a high after hammering Newcastle last weekend, but can they end the Reds’ flawless start?

“Leicester have done very well,” says BBC football expert Mark Lawrenson. “We know how good Jamie Vardy is up front and of course Foxes boss Brendan Rodgers is going back to his old club, which gives this game an extra edge.

“Rodgers will be thinking his side can get at Liverpool after watching Red Bull Salzburg score three times on Wednesday night, but it is the other end where I think they will struggle.

“I look at Leicester defensively and I do not see them holding out.”

Lawro is making predictions for all 380 top-flight matches this season, against a variety of guests.

This week he is up against athletics legend and BBC pundit Michael Johnson.

Johnson, a four-time Olympic gold medallist and eight-time world champion, is part of the BBC team at the 2010 World Athletics Championships in Doha

Johnson, who also runs his own performance training company, recently met up with Tottenham boss Mauricio Pochettino to share some of his sporting knowledge.

“We have worked with many teams in the past – Arsenal, Manchester United and some of the Brazilian clubs,” Johnson told BBC Sport.

“We focus on athletic development, away from the skill of the sport.

“It was fantastic visit to Spurs to see how they operate, and great to talk about how they are integrating athletic development into their academy and building players, and helping young players achieve their potential.

“Mauricio has a real winning mindset and understands the psychology around players, and how motivation is extremely important.

“We talked a lot about how that approach is very different with each athlete, because each athlete is motivated differently. He shows a keen understanding of that and I think that is why he has been so successful.

2019 World Athletics Championships Venue: Khalifa International Stadium, Doha Dates: 27 September-6 October Coverage: Watch live on BBC TV, BBC iPlayer and BBC Sport website and app; Listen live on BBC Radio 5 Live; Live streams, clips and text commentary online.

Premier League predictions – week eight Result Lawro Michael SATURDAY Brighton v Tottenham x-x 0-2 1-3 Burnley v Everton x-x 2-1 2-1 Liverpool v Leicester x-x 2-1 4-2 Norwich v Aston Villa x-x 1-1 2-0 Watford v Sheff Utd x-x 2-1 0-2 West Ham v Crystal Palace x-x 2-0 2-0 SUNDAY Arsenal v Bournemouth x-x 2-0 1-0 Man City v Wolves x-x 3-0 3-1 Southampton v Chelsea x-x 1-2 0-3 Newcastle v Man Utd x-x 1-1 0-1

A correct result (picking a win, draw or defeat) is worth 10 points. The exact score earns 40 points.

LAWRO’S PREDICTIONS

All kick-offs 15:00 BST unless stated.

SATURDAY

Brighton v Tottenham (12:30 BST)

It would not surprise me if Tottenham manager Pochettino leaves the club in the near future.

Since the summer, some of the things he has said – like when he talked about how he is ‘only the coach’ and has no say in transfers – makes it feel to me like he is in the process of a long break-up.

I have thought for a while that Pochettino looks tired and how it looks like being Spurs manager has become a chore for him – but maybe he does not need time out of football, just out of Tottenham.

‘My feeling is so bad’ – Pochettino on heavy Bayern defeat

Spurs paid the price for chasing their Champions League game against Bayern on Tuesday when they were 4-2 down, and ended up conceding seven goals in total.

But I still think they will go to Brighton and win.

Spurs have got some very good players. Yes, they have had a stinker but surely there will be a reaction this weekend.

And the Seagulls have got problems of their own, with only two points from their past six games.

Brighton manager Graham Potter is reaching the stage where he might need to rethink his philosophy about playing good football for the sake of picking up some points.

Lawro’s prediction: 0-2

Michael’s prediction: 1-3

Burnley v Everton

Everton lost to Manchester City last time out but I thought they did all right. At least they had a go.

That is part of the problem, though, because we have not seen enough performances like that from them.

It is strange how they did not do the same against Sheffield United in their previous home game, for example.

Everton 1-3 Man City: Positives to take from City defeat – Marco Silva

Goals remain an issue for the Toffees, and that situation is not going to change anytime soon.

I know Dominic Calvert-Lewin scored against City but they do not carry enough of a threat up front, especially away from home where they have only managed one goal in three matches this season.

They have also picked up only one point on the road – a 0-0 draw at Palace on the opening day, before defeats by Aston Villa and Bournemouth – which does not exactly give me great belief they will get anything at Turf Moor either.

You know what you are going to get from Burnley, and I don’t think Everton are going to be able to deal with it.

Lawro’s prediction: 2-1

Michael’s prediction: 2-1

Liverpool v Leicester

I appreciate that Leicester are dangerous when they go forward, but I don’t think they are good enough at the back to get themselves a result at Anfield.

There do seem to be a few issues in the Liverpool defence right now, but there is nothing wrong with the front three.

Leicester will have to do more in attack than they managed at Old Trafford last month, when they lost to Manchester United. Apart from forcing David de Gea into an early save, they did not really do enough against a team in transition.

Liverpool will offer a much tougher test and it feels to me like Leicester will have to be at the very top of their game and take every chance that comes their way if they are going to get something out of this one.

Lawro’s prediction: 2-1

Michael’s prediction: 4-2

Norwich v Aston Villa

You can tell I have got my doubts abut Norwich because I have predicted them to lose every game so far this season, but their home form is actually very good.

I do worry about the Canaries, because they beat Manchester City and played brilliantly, then got beaten easily at Burnley and Crystal Palace without looking like they were going to trouble either team.

Crystal Palace 2-0 Norwich Players need to learn from ‘harsh’ lessons after Palace defeat

Their away performances have to get a lot better, because their survival hopes cannot rely exclusively on what they can do at Carrow Road. If it is all about that, then eventually the pressure will tell.

Another problem Norwich have is at the back. They have conceded 16 goals in seven games this season, which means they usually have to score at least two just to get a point.

On paper, you would expect them to beat an Aston Villa side who have lost three out of three on the road this season – but results alone do not tell the full story for Dean Smith’s side.

There were in winning positions with less than 20 minutes to go at Tottenham and Arsenal, but lost both games, and were unlucky not to get anything from their defeat by Crystal Palace too after having a late equaliser controversially ruled out.

Both teams were promoted last season and have had some big lessons about how hard the Premier League is.

There are reasons why they are both in the bottom four and they need to improve if they are going to climb the table.

As far as Saturday goes, I am going to go for a 1-1 draw because I cannot see either side keeping a clean sheet.

Lawro’s prediction: 1-1

Michael’s prediction: 2-0

Watford v Sheff Utd

After last week’s defeat by Wolves, Watford are now the only top-flight team without a win.

I am not sure exactly what is wrong with the Hornets because they look a shadow of the side they were last season, despite having most of the same players that finished 11th.

Sheffield United showed against Liverpool last week that they will give everybody a game but I just have a funny feeling this will be the game where Watford stop the rot.

That has nothing to do with form, obviously. It is more that we know how good the Hornets players can be, and this might be the week where things start to happen for them and new manager Quique Sanchez Flores.

Lawro’s prediction: 2-1

Michael’s prediction: 0-2

West Ham v Crystal Palace (17:30 BST)

Both of these teams are going well and West Ham, in particular, have impressed me.

They seem to have added a bit of steel at the back compared to last season and Andriy Yarmolenko has shown how good he is since returning from his long-term injury.

The Hammers have more to offer in attack than Palace do, which is why I think they will get the win here. I just can’t really see the Eagles causing them too much trouble.

Lawro’s prediction: 2-0

Michael’s prediction: 2-0

SUNDAY

Arsenal v Bournemouth (14:00 BST)

Arsenal were pretty awful against Manchester United on Monday but they will look at a draw at Old Trafford as being a good point, regardless of United’s current position.

Emery wants ‘more’ from players after Man Utd draw

Bournemouth have made a bright start to the season but I don’t look at this game as one where they will expect to get anything – they have not picked up a point in four previous visits to the Emirates, and I don’t think that run will end this weekend.

Yes, the Cherries will have chances, but Arsenal are going to have a lot of the ball and they have the quality in their attack to make it count.

Lawro’s prediction: 2-0

Michael’s prediction: 1-0

Man City v Wolves (14:00 BST)

Wolves play in Turkey in the Europa League on Thursday night so this is a tough turnaround before they travel to play the defending champions.

Manchester City made a big statement with their win last weekend, because a lot of people were expecting their makeshift defence to crack when Everton had a go at them.

Everton 1-3 Man City: City need to fight to defend title – Pep Guardiola

I would argue that going to Goodison Park and winning was one of their best results so far this season, and I think they will find things a lot easier on Sunday.

Wolves are better when they come forward than they are when they sit in, and I am expecting City to find a way through them.

Lawro’s prediction: 3-0

Michael’s prediction: 3-1

Southampton v Chelsea (14:00 BST)

Chelsea have had a good week, with wins over Brighton and Lille, but they are still a side that gives chances away.

Frank Lampard’s side are improving week by week but, at the moment, they are still a team that can be vulnerable in different periods of games.

Chelsea ‘needed’ that victory over Brighton – Lampard

That is what I am expecting to happen at St Mary’s. The Blues should win, but Southampton will have some opportunities too, and it is going to be close.

I was actually expecting more from Saints this season in their first full campaign under Ralph Hasenhuttl, but so far they don’t look like they have got much better.

They are still waiting for their first home win of the season, and I don’t think they will get it this week.

Lawro’s prediction: 1-2

Michael’s prediction: 0-3

Newcastle v Man Utd (16:30 BST)

Newcastle waved the white flag at Leicester on Sunday.

They completely capitulated in the second half and I am sure Magpies manager Steve Bruce will have made it clear to his players this week just how unacceptable that was.

We were badly punished for big mistakes – Bruce

I would expect to see a reaction from them, and I also think some of the Newcastle fans who stayed away from their draw with Brighton will be back for this game.

Manchester United huffed and puffed their way through their draw with Arsenal on Monday and never really looked like they were good enough to take full control of the game.

I understand why United boss Ole Gunnar Solskjaer is saying it is going to take time for his side to turn things around but, as well as having a long-term plan, they need to get back to winning ways soon.

Lawro’s prediction: 1-1

Michael’s prediction: 0-1

Lawro was speaking to BBC Sport’s Chris Bevan

How did Lawro do last week?

From the last set of Premier League fixtures, Lawro got eight correct results, including three exact scores, out of 10 matches for a total of 170 points, his highest score of the season so far.

He beat former Tour de France winner Geraint Thomas, who got six correct results, with one exact score, for a total of 90 points.

+/- DENOTE POSITION DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LAWRO’S TABLE AND ACTUAL POSITION TEAM P W D L PTS +/- 1 Man City 7 7 0 0 21 +1 2 Liverpool 7 6 1 0 19 -1 3 Chelsea 7 5 1 1 16 +4 4 Tottenham 7 4 2 1 14 +2 5 Leicester 7 4 1 2 13 -2 =6 Arsenal 7 3 3 1 12 -2 =6 Man Utd 7 3 3 1 12 +4 =8 Aston Villa 7 3 2 2 11 +10 =8 Everton 7 3 2 2 11 +7 10 Newcastle 7 3 0 4 9 +9 =11 Burnley 7 2 2 3 8 0 =11 Crystal Palace 7 2 2 3 8 -2 =13 Bournemouth 7 2 1 4 7 -5 =13 Sheff Utd 7 2 1 4 7 -1 =13 Watford 7 2 1 4 7 +7 =13 West Ham 7 2 1 4 7 -8 =13 Wolves 7 2 1 4 7 0 18 Southampton 7 2 0 5 6 -4 19 Brighton 7 0 2 5 2 -3 20 Norwich 7 0 0 7 0 -3

GUEST LEADERBOARD 2019-20

Score Guest leaderboard 104 Lawro (average after seven weeks) 100 Adam Peaty 90 Helen Housby, Jo Harten, Geraint Thomas 70 Craig Mitch 60 Stefan Ratchford 50 Chelcee Grimes, Reece Parkinson, Sam Warburton 40 Stephen Fry

Total scores after week seven Lawro 730 Guests 500

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