#it's ok! sometimes things just end up looking meh

[dr-wormman]

Got a little weird with this one since I've had mosaics on the mind

[gryficowa]

Boycott!

Tia… Apparently "Beetlejuice 2" came out (Now there's a wave of it like with everything else), but I don't care, sorry, I'm not a Burton fanatic, a few good jokes and nice shots are never enough for me (That's why I was never fan of the movie "Avatar", for me its hype is too inflated, because the only thing that shows good computer graphics, but the story is meh)

And yes, I grew up watching Tim Burton's Willy Wonka, but even that didn't make me like his work, hello, I didn't even watch "Wendstey" and then everyone was talking about it and making memes out of it…

My taste is specific, I often like things that others don't like (Reboot "Ben 10" and "Be Cool Scooby Doo") and I don't like things that others love ("Rick and Morty" as it was popular, actually, I'm still not a fan of this, sorry, not enough moments that I liked, or "Violetta", someone explain to me why this shit was popular? It was boring and characters as dimensional as Bill Cipher's…)

My taste is simply too different (Maybe because of my origins, but still, it doesn't matter that something is cult if I don't like it…)

And yes, my memories of the movie BJ are so meh, and the end of the movie left me with a bad taste… I don't know, it's just a typical problem with Burton's work, I have the impression that as a director and creator he is overrated (I don't know what word put it here, ok?)

And yes, I have ASD (Before someone with Ableism gets away from me, I'm a person with ASD, so I can say that I don't like his work, I'm a weirdo myself and I have strange taste, but it doesn't change the fact that I have problems with his work, I'm sorry, but I won't change it, I can't fully describe what I don't like, because because of ASD I have problems with describing my feelings, so, as I mentioned, I appreciate the look of the shots and a few gags, but even that won't make me love something, I can't be bought that easily, I need honest character dynamics, and this is something what bothers me about his work, I know, We, people with ASD, have a problem with showing emotions in some cases, or with describing them, but something just doesn't feel right to me and I really can't describe it, the only way I can describe it is that it's quite… Stiff? I know, maybe it doesn't fit to describe what I feel, but I don't feel that the characters reflect each other or have any relationship with each other, the only thing they have in common is the script and dialogues… I'm also tired of the fact that sometimes there is a forced romance, I know, a typical problem with hetero relationships in productions, but it just looks like "Hey, he's straight, so don't worry "that he's a hidden gay or something," but okay, it's a common problem, especially in the last century and at the beginning of this one, which doesn't change the fact that I have my problems with Burton, so yes, even reboots that are hated, at least give something in return, i.e. character dynamics, so you understand, it's a problem that is difficult for me to describe as a person with ASD, but even I have something that doesn't suit me…)

I guess the fandom will hate me for having the nerve to talk about the problems I have with something that's iconic in the USA… But I just can't convince myself that I like something because it's iconic, sorry I have different tastes , but it's not my fault, there's nothing wrong with liking something and there's nothing wrong with not liking something, if it makes you happy and helped you get through a difficult period (GF, vocaloid and musical BJ, that happened to me…), then it's ok if they harass you for liking it (Because they consider it immature or cringe) then that's fine it's their problem, not you, it's the same if you don't like something (Sorry, I'm not a Lydia X Beetlejuice fanatic, I don't like a ship based on a long-time demon and a minor character… Relationship? Okay, lovers? sus)

Now that I have your attention:

--------------------------------------------------------------

I'm writing again, it irritates me, I often don't know what to write, which is why I often see the text "Boycott" and a GIF, or I write and I start to worry that the collections won't reach people because they won't read it to the end…

My feelings towards the Beetlejuice/Tim Burton movie will probably also cause a lot of controversy… Eh… It's less of a worry than the fact that the collections don't arrive…

I'm just tired of the fact that many great artists are underrated, and those who often create something bland are the most overrated, we have so many great creators, but they can't stand out and that's something that really depresses me, I want more artists with ASD and they can prove it even to Burton that they know the dynamics of characters, I just want more creators with ASD, give them a fucking chance, why do they have to not have a diagnosis to achieve anything? This sucks…

[twstwinnie]

♚ With You ~ Lilia Vanrouge

summary: in a relationship with Lilia! usual three categories: pining, confession, and dating! while this should be a given, I’ll say it explicitly here: the reader is an adult in this given Lilia’s age <3 whether they’re a third year like Leona, or the prefect, is up to you as the reader!

tags: hurt/comfort, fluff, mutual pining, gn! reader

a/n: OK SO. this was a request from the comments (I do read those!) also, i was inspired to write for Lilia because I have a friend who really loves him, and i too love the bat boy! so, consider this a sort of love letter to Lilia as a character! For requests, Sebek is likely next, though feel free to lmk what y’all wanna see in asks/comments! enjoy!! special thanks to my beloved Lilia lovers for giving me inspo xx — winnie ♥︎

♚ starry - eyed !

» Unlike many other students at NRC, Lilia is one of few who’s fully aware of how he feels about you. He’s been alive long enough to recognize the signs— a quickened heartbeat, his eyes lingering on you for a few moments too long, even the way he seeks out your company in his free time.

» While, yes, he’s aware of his feelings, he’s stopped dead in his tracks by fear. It’s such a silly thing to him, really, but he can’t help it. He finds himself afraid that his lifespan might scare you off. Sure, he’s probably not got very long left, but in comparison to your human lifespan— it’s still quite a bit longer. Would you be alright with that? Or would his practical immortality be a dealbreaker?

» He knows that you accept him despite your difference in species, but would that translate if he was romantically interested? He hasn’t a clue, and so he’s bitten his tongue about how he truly feels— hiding behind a mask of teasing and jokes for the time being.

» Yes, teasing. No amount of reservations towards confessing could ever stop Lilia from teasing you. If anything, it only causes his teasing to increase, eventually evolving into something a bit more flirtatious.

» When you’re engrossed in any type of study at the library, he’ll appear in front of you, floating upside down with a wide grin on his face. When you jump back, startled, he merely laughs and comments on how cute you look when you’re focused.

» Sometimes, when you’re walking to class or back to your dorm, he’ll jump out and hug you from behind, near-tackling you to the ground. And though you’re always startled, you always know it’s Lilia hugging you. You’ll just let out a laugh, turn around, and hug him right back. The first time it happened, Lilia couldn’t help his shocked expression, easily melting into your warmth. Now, it’s exactly what he wants and expects when he does this. After all, hearing your laughter and gentle tone as you return his hug is always worth it to him.

» Despite all of this, though, he can’t find it in him to confess— convinced that you two are better off as friends. Who knows what the future holds? Human lives are already so delicate— would it truly be worth it for what’ll feel like a flash of happiness?

» This point comes up when he’s playing online games with Idia. Honestly, he doesn’t quite expect the conversation to take such a turn, but it does.

» “Red, you’ve been a lot less active lately. Kind of an L… but I guess it’s to be expected since you’ve got that partner of yours. Meh. At least you seem happier,” Idia comments. Lilia audibly hums, hands pausing on his keyboard.

» “Ah, you’re mistaken, Shroud. They aren’t my partner— just a friend! Much like you!” Lilia chimes. Idia lets out a quiet, disgruntled sound on the other end.

» “Uh, yeah, pass. We aren’t friends like that. I’m not blind, Lilia. Everyone sees how you look at them. If you were like that with me I’d be weirded out… but uh, why haven’t you told them anyway?” Idia idly questions, and Lilia sighs.

» “Well, us fae have prolonged lifespans. I can imagine that’d be a dealbreaker for most. I’m fine just being their cutest friend!” Lilia hums, but he can practically hear Idia’s eyes roll from the other end.

» “That’s a load of BS. Look, I’m not good at IRL romance, but from what I’ve seen in games, love interests get totally peeved when you try deciding things for them! The, uh… fae-immortality thing. Have you ever even talked to them about it?”

» That made Lilia pause. Well, he supposed he hadn’t really mentioned it to you… but he’d always assumed based on what he’d heard from so many others that you’d believe the same. Before he could respond, Idia continued.

» “And like, OP immortality stuff aside, that last line is a total lie. Are you really fine being stuck all friend-zoned? Can you handle someone else sweeping them away from you? And in the future, what if you aren’t even close? I doubt losing the route is better than, I dunno, trying?” Idia mumbles. Lilia takes a moment to process before letting out a bright laugh.

» “You should speak your mind like this more, Idia,” Lilia mentions.

» “In person? Uh, yeah, no way.”

» The conversation sticks with him, though. Idia is right. Lilia can never possibly know how you feel unless he confesses to you. Even if the future may be uncertain, the thought of losing you— of no longer having you by his side— wasn’t worth it. If confessing meant he’d have a chance to stay with you for the rest of your life, then he’d risk it.

» He’d never met anyone as kind, caring, and understanding as you. Not only did you listen to his many stories from his lifespan, you never doubted any of it for a second. You always give his cooking a try even though you know it’ll be less than edible, but you never judge him. You give him pointers, help him in the kitchen, and dutifully support him in his improvement. Sometimes, you’ll cook for him when he’s a bit too tired to give it another shot.

» You happily joke with him, tease him, compliment him, and spend time with him without a care for what his status used to be. When people warn you of “Diasomnia’s Powerful Vice Housewarden,” you look the other way. You don’t see his titles, his power— you just see him. You adore him not because he could crush you in an instant, but because you’ve become friends with the playful fae that he is.

» In his entire life, he’s met very few people as kind as you. However, you’ve been the one of the only ones to see and embrace all sides of him. Whether he’s fighting for his loved ones, or on stage with the rest of the Light Music club— you accept him.

» In the past, he’s made the mistake of letting go of the ones he loves. Because he thinks it’s better for them— because he feels that he’s dangerous or a dealbreaker. This time, he’s determined to do things differently.

» He wants it to be your choice. You’ve respected him and his choices, so he owes you the same treatment. This time, it’ll be different.

» He’ll confess to you properly and hear your answer. He just hopes it’s the one he also wants to hear.

♚ say the words !

» Lilia hasn’t properly confessed to someone in ages. He isn’t above asking for help should he need it, but it’s more of a matter of who to ask. Surely not his fellow Diasomnia members— they didn’t have as much romantic experience. Idia’s knowledge extends only to virtual games, so eventually, he settles on asking his clubmates.

» When he presents his issue, he’s surprised to find Cater gaping at him, Kalim equally as shocked. Just as Idia had, they assumed that you were already dating him. (Just how many people thought this?)

» After their shock subsided, Cater was more than happy to assist, along with Kalim. Lilia’s courting knowledge was vast, but much of it was outdated. He didn’t want to scare you off, so he wanted to learn some of the more modern methods of courtship.

» Though, both of the suggestions he received fell flat. Cater suggested a very Magicam worthy date, while Kalim suggested a carpet ride of sorts. They both offered to assist with their respective ideas, but Lilia couldn’t accept. None of it felt right. While he was sure both ideas would impress you, it didn’t feel authentic.

» As much as Lilia loved to tease, he wanted this confession to be serious— to be personal. He didn’t want to pretend to be someone he wasn’t. Eventually, he asked Silver for help. Surely, he’d have some insight considering how well he knew Lilia.

» “Have you considered just using one of the methods you already know, father?” Silver asks with a tilt of his head.

» “I’m afraid all of my methods are rather outdated for this day and age, Silver,” Lilia muses. Silver responds with a small sigh and shakes his head.

» “So? They know who you are already, right? Even if the method’s a little outdated, it’ll be true to yourself. They’ve gotten to know you, so I doubt they’d expect something modern anyway,” Silver finishes. Lilia’s eyes widened and he smiled. Of course, how could he forget?

» You already knew of his vast experiences across countless years. Perhaps, trying to adapt to a modernity he was unfamiliar with simply wasn’t right. He’d confess to you in a way that felt true to him. He was certain you’d understand.

» Eventually, Lilia settled on something true to his Briar Valley roots. Rather traditional, but it was still romantic to him. He’d enchant a briar rose, wrap it in the twine from a spinning wheel, and seal it in a glass case. Then, when the moon was high in the sky, he’d present it to you. Should you return his feelings, the rose would live on. If not, it would wilt away.

» The story such a tradition originated from resonated with him. Someone beautiful and bright falling for someone considered a monstrous outcast. It was quite touching. He wasted no time in gathering his materials, going as far as to travel back home for a moment to find the most beautiful rose for the confession.

» Once finished, he enchanted the rose, imbuing it with his magic— his wish to be with you for the rest of your eternity. Then, the briar rose was tied with twine and sealed away into the glass case. With a smile on his face, he waited as night fell, then sought you out.

» Luckily, your light was on, though dim through your window. Tapping lightly on the glass, he tested to see if you were awake. The sudden noise startled you, but you knew only one person who could possibly visit you this late at night. And enter through your window, no less!

» “Lilia? It’s late, why are you here?” you question in a hush tone, moving to the side to allow him entry into your room. He slips in, grinning as he presents you the rose.

» “As is Briar Valley tradition, I can only present this to you at night. I hope you don’t mind the intrusion,” Lilia says, watching your expression carefully. Your eyes widen as you take the encased rose, observing it closely.

» “It’s beautiful. What’s the occasion? Did something happen?” you ask with a light laugh as you scan the flower. Before he can answer, your eyes widen as you seemingly put the pieces together.

» “Wait… you’ve mentioned this. This is a Briar Rose, right? The string wrapped around it… the glass… Briar Valley tradition— ah! Are you…?” your voice trails off as your face flushes. Lilia merely grins, eyes glinting with mischief.

» “Am I what, dearest?” he questions with a teasing tone. You shake your head and laugh, covering your face a bit.

» “Is this… a confession?” you whisper. Lilia’s eyes soften and he approaches you, placing his hands over yours as he peered into the glass at the rose.

» “How observant. You really do listen to me! This is a confession. I’m terribly in love with you. You’ve invaded my every thought before I could think to stop you! So I’ve decided to tell you. I know my nature can be a bit… alarming, but I wanted to tell you anyway. Silly, isn’t it?” Lilia says softly.

» “It isn’t silly, Lilia. And of course it’s mutual. For as omnipotent as you tend to be at times, you’re a little clueless, aren’t you?” you respond with a warm laugh. Lilia looks at you and tilts his head.

» “What do you mean?” he asks.

» “I’ve liked you for a long time now. Have you ever noticed my advances? I don’t treat you like I treat my other friends, y’know! Plus, the whole immortality thing doesn’t scare me… no part of you ever could,” you say. Lilia processes for a moment before beaming with a sharp grin.

» “Oh really? You’ll be stuck with me for quite some time? Are you truly ready to have such a cute, wonderful partner for the rest of your life?” he teases. You merely smile, placing the rose to the side. Pulling him into a tight hug, you gently nod.

» “I’ve been ready for quite some time now. I’m more than happy to call you mine.”

» Lilia melts into your embrace and lets out a breath he wasn’t aware he was holding in. All of his memories of you come flooding into his mind. He’d been too afraid of judgment to notice at the time, but now he could see it— the way you reserved your brightest smiles for him. The way you’d gently lean into his side when sitting together— even the way you’d watch after Silver on his behalf.

» You’d loved him for quite some time, and now he could finally say that you were his. He’d have you by his side— and he could look towards the future with no regrets, knowing you’d be there.

♚ at last, with you !

» After you two officially start dating, Lilia acts more or less the same, however, in addition to his usual teasing, he becomes a lot more comfortable being openly affectionate with you.

» Are you walking beside him? His hand is intertwined with yours, then. Just sat down with your friends for lunch? Expect him to hug you from behind and kiss your temple as a greeting. Are you having a study session? Well Lilia’s there, leaned against your side and resting against you as you work. Lilia loves affection, so he gives you plenty of it.

» While he usually initiates any affection, if you ever initiate it first, it makes him incredibly happy. If you reach for his hand first, or greet him with a kiss, he always gets a wide grin and teases you about it. He’ll joke that you actually do love him, and that you must be head over heels for him to initiate such sweet affection. Once he manages to get your face to flush under his relentless teasing, he’ll let up and ask you to do whatever affection you initiated again.

» With how touchy he is, it’s only natural that people find out that you two are actually dating now. Because of your increased presence in Diasomnia, Silver, Malleus, and Sebek are quick to find out.

» Silver and Malleus are entirely supportive. Silver can visibly see how happy you make his father. Lilia spends less time alone nowadays, so Silver doesn’t have to worry about him as much anymore. He knows you’re a great match for Lilia given how much you care for him. Plus, your cooking is easily much better than his dad’s, but hey! Your presence has also made Lilia’s food more tolerable, so Silver’s content.

» Malleus is glad that Lilia’s found someone who respects him, but also accepts his more peculiar aspects. It’s something Malleus often struggled with himself, typically only having Lilia to turn to. In you, Lilia has found a partner, but Malleus has also found a cherished friend. You respect him, invite him out, and listen to him just as you do with Lilia. With such a kind soul, it’s only natural Lilia was drawn to you. So long as you two take care of one another, Malleus is certain that it’s a bond that’ll last a long time.

» Sebek is a different story. He’s at war with his internalized hatred against humans. He wants to respect Lilia’s choice, but he struggles to understand why at first. So, at the beginning he’s weary— closely watching your every move. Instead of finding flaws, he comes to realize why Lilia chose you. You don’t use him for his power, you engage with him and his hobbies, and you even watch after Malleus and Silver. With time, Sebek warms up to you. Of course he does! Perhaps, not all humans are bad. You’ve certainly proved that to him.

» His dormmates’— well, family’s approval is all that Lilia needs to know he’s made the best decision possible for himself. You fit right into his small family, as if you were always meant to be there. You fit right into his life, actually.

» You’re always in the crowd during his Light Music club performances. During the Magift tournaments, you’re in the crowd, cheering his name. Even when he finds himself busy with schoolwork, you’re there— sitting across from him as you work on your own assignments. He’s become so used to your presence in his daily life, but he does love dates with you, as well.

» Designated time to spend with one another. Naturally, he very much enjoys spending time alone with you. More often than not, you two have date nights in. Playing games, watching movies, staying up— it’s all a bit juvenile, but Lilia’s proud of his childish side. Plus, as long as you’re having fun, then it’s worth it.

» He loves those nights so much. Laying side by side after the movies are over, curled up together and having hushed conversation. It’s his favorite. You’ll share your dreams— your aspirations in the dark of the night. Lilia shares his experiences, the things he’s seen that he can’t wait to show you. It helps him visualize the vast future you both have ahead of you— the experiences he has yet to have. It makes him excited, but as much as he wants to see it, he’s content with time passing slowly by your side. As long as he’s with you, he’s happy.

» However, for as much as you two play around, for as much as you both cause chaos together— it isn’t all bright and sunny. Lilia is prone to painful nightmares— memories of his past dredging up and meshing with his recent memories. He’ll dream of losing Silver, Sebek, Malleus— even you— to a war much like the one he’d experienced. During those nights, he’s lucky if he gets even a single hour of sleep.

» You always seem to notice, though. In the morning, you’ll see his tired expression. No matter how much he tries to cover it with a grin, you see right through him. You never judge him or pity him, though. You merely guide him back to his room— school forgotten in favor of a day of healing. You’ll lay him down, remaining by his side as you run your fingers through his hair.

» “I’m here, and you aren’t gonna lose me. We’ve still got a lifetime ahead of us. You can rest. I’ll be here by your side when you wake up.”

» Your soothing words always put a smile on his face. He’ll hold you a little tighter as he drifts back to sleep, knowing that you’ll be there to comfort him should his nightmares wake him up again. On the days that his terrors do startle him awake again, you’re right there— gently rubbing circles into his back as he tells you what he saw. No matter how horrifying the nightmare, your smile remains as you comfort him— assure him that it won’t happen. Lilia will not lose you.

» You’ll always lighten the mood after, teasing him and insisting that he cannot be rid of you that easily. It always puts a smile on Lilia’s face, causing him to quirk a brow and question as to whatever could’ve possessed you to think that’d he’d want you gone?

» After some shared laughter as well as a few playful fights, Lilia manages to relax, night terrors long forgotten in favor of your warmth and comfort.

» Your comfort is so important to him. Of course, he loves being reassured that you won’t go anywhere, but it goes deeper than that.

» At NRC, Lilia is regarded as a terrifying fae with extensive abilities. Though he frequently jokes about his age, there are very few who actually believe him. Most think he’s merely joking— thus his struggles often go unnoticed. After all, someone that powerful couldn’t possibly be affected by loss after experiencing so much of it, or, he must be lying! He looks far too young to have been in any sort of war!

» As much as he tends to laugh it off, it gets to him. He’s forced to hold back— unable to express that emotional side of him. All people see is the conniving, teasing third year. If he ever expressed his painful experiences from his past, he’d likely be called a liar. In truth, he isn’t. And loss doesn’t hurt any less just because he’s strong. The sting of loss hurts just as much the first time as it does countless times after.

» And you understand that. You believe him. With a gentle smile and soft affection, you show him that while his experiences have made him stronger, it doesn’t mean he has to be immune to pain or fear. You show him that he doesn’t need to always hide away behind a facade of playfulness around you. You’re always there to listen, should he need the space to talk.

» For that, Lilia is grateful. You’re willing to share his best and worst moments, and you do so without pitying him or doubting him. You love him dearly. Teasing, serious, even a little scary— all are sides of him that you adore.

» For Lilia, that’s important. Because he knows he has a limited amount of time left, and that your time is limited, as well. For you to be so willing to dedicate that time to him— it’s quite beautiful.

» And with whatever time Lilia has left, he plans to do just the same.

» For you are the very embodiment of the future he hopes to live. And so long as that briar rose he confessed with remains bloomed, he knows that you feel the exact same.

— fin.

[emi-maru]

A few weeks ago I switched to Linux and I've got some thoughts

I chose Arch Linux because I had some prior experience with using Ubuntu and Linux Mint on laptops, both for work and for myself.

Gaming is, aside from games that require certain anticheats, extremely easy to set up. Steam just works and I use Heroic as an alternative frontend for the Epic games launch and GOG Galaxy and it runs better than both of them did on windows. I haven't looked into Origin the EA App or Uplay Ubisoft Connect but I know I could play their stuff via Lutris or Bottles.

I locked myself out of my system once because I didn't verify a change I made to my fstab (basically a file where all your drives are listed) and while that's my fault for not verifying, you'd think the os would be able to boot if some drive that's not necessary isn't plugged in. A little help from a mutual helped me fix it.

Gnome is a very meh desktop environment. It's kinda considered the default for Linux and aside from KDE and budgie the only one I'm really familiar with. I had to install a bunch of extensions for it to work the way I wanted and it also comes with a bunch of preinstalled software that I don't need and can't (without fearing I'll break something) get rid of (for example, I use Alacrity but have to keep Gnome Console around).

The theming is so good. I can theme so much stuff it's great. I start up LibreOffice and it picks up the background and accent colour I set, I love it.

I'm getting more comfortable with using the terminal and while I still think that ideally every application should have a GUI, sometimes the terminal is more convenient (like using yay to update my entire system).

When I used Windows I had sporadic crackling sounds that I assumed were the fault of my DAC/AMP but I haven't had them since switching to Linux so I guess this was a Windows issue somehow. I tried so many fixes before that didn't work like checking drivers and firmware, using different usb ports and cables, trying different headphones but to no avail even when I got a completely new pc. Thanks, Windows.

I don't get Flatpak at all. Universal packages are neat but when I installed the Flatpak version of Bottles to run save/mod managers inside the proton prefixes that Steam uses, it suddenly took up almost 5gb. It also for whatever reason couldn't see half the folders even after I gave it access to the entire file system. In the end I went with the AUR version of Bottles which does not have that problem despite being Unofficial™. I just wish that the library/shortcut system worked but I can live with it I guess.

The AUR seemed annoying because it took forever to build packages compared to just installing binaries. The Chaotic AUR is a godsent because it contains a ton of binaries from the AUR. I don't get why people don't recommend it more often.

The only software I really miss from windows is ShareX. Not even because of all the tools like scroll capture, but also for OCR. Watching a vod of a twitch stream and being able to grab links out of the chat on screen is nice. Maybe I'll find an alternative someday, who knows.

I've come to despise a lot of people who think that the way they use Linux is the only good one. A big thing that kept me from switching was that the more I informed myself, the more weird opinionated takes I saw. Being forced to engage with questions such as "Is systemd bloat?", " Is neovim the only good text editor?", "Are tiling window managers universally better?", " Is Canonical literally Satan for having made Snap packages?" and "Is it ok to call this person a slur for using solarized KDE?" makes it so much harder to make a choice you're comfortable with.

I should not have put /home on a different partition or at least made the /root partition bigger. It's fine if I clean the pacman cache regularly but I don't want to look up those commands every few days (I know I can resize the boot partition with a live usb and I will, I'm just lazy rn).

My controller only works correctly when plugged in via usb. If I connect it via Bluetooth, the buttons don't map correctly. This is less of a Linux issue and more of a firmware issue since this is a third party controller that does not support Linux. I'm also aware of Steam having a robust remapping tool so I'll use that if I ever need to.

I have not yet looked into software to map my additional mouse buttons and control my keyboard/mouse rbg. Both of these store their settings on board so there's no need for it right now.

Might add more in the future but these are my thoughts for the first few weeks

[bookaddict24-7]

2024 Reading Goals!

I'm always a bit more lax with my reading goals because I never really know how a year is going to treat me--the last thing I need is stress over my reading (which is admittedly my biggest escape from life). BUT with that being said, making some goals that aren't set in stone is always a fun exercise!

Eleven Reading Goals I'd Like to Achieve in 2024:

Read at least 250 books. (I listen to a lot of audiobooks, so this isn't usually a major stress factor. Even if I wanted to read less, my reading addiction wouldn't really allow it. When I'm not reading, I'm thinking about reading. It's just who I am. BUT keep in mind that this is my goal based on my reading habits. everyone has a different reading habit!)

Finish, or nearly finish the Sookie Stackhouse series. (Of course, this is super dependant on when I get the audiobooks from the library LOL.)

Finish the books on my desk. (I have...a few started books on here. It's cluttering up the space and I feel like I just really want to read them but I'm a mood reader, so...)

(Fourth Wing is a re-read that I was annotating and dropped when something new came out and my attention was stolen away.)

4. Read a few books from each bookshelf of my bedroom. (I already went through the shelves last week and assigned myself a handful of books or so from each shelf for each month of 2024. I just want to specifically target some of the books on my shelves to encourage myself to read more of my owned books. Maybe I should share that progress on here to keep myself accountable. Hm...)

5. Continue to DNF books I don't like. (This is a practice I've been using for the last couple of years, but I also want to remind anyone reading this that it is OK to put down that book you're not vibing with. Life is too short.)

6. Read more formats, not just audiobooks. (I LOVE audiobooks and owe them so much. But I also do sometimes miss having the attention span to read physically. I read a lot more physical books in November & December and I loved it. Also, I pay for KU, so I might as well use it more in 2024.)

7. Try to buy less books. (Seriously, I've gone off the deep end in the last four months. I need to rein it back in. Maybe I should keep a monthly track of it to remind myself not to do the book buying thing as much.)

8. Diversify my reading even more. (Pretty self-explanatory, I think.)

9. Continue to review every book I read this year. (I've been doing this for the past couple of years and it has felt both a bit overwhelming and super rewarding. I love that I can look back on these last few years and read my opinion of whatever books I read during those years.)

10. Unhaul more books. (Life is too short and my shelves are too full to keep books I felt meh about, or don't think I need. Trust me: the first unhaul is the hardest, but after that, it's a little too easy to unhaul books.)

11. Read more of my ARCs. (They are currently staring at me from their designated shelves. I WILL read my very old ARCs at some point in my life, hopefully some will be in 2024.)

___

What are some of your goals for 2024?

___

Thank you for being with me throughout another year of book blogging and post sharing! I hope everyone has a fantastic year full of reading and good health!

___

Happy reading!

[merrikiwi]

What we got up to in July 2024

Writing this blog post is an idea I came up with because it is fun but also because it forces us to reflect on the month and what we did. We've been trying (badly) to keep track of all the things we watched in the year so we can do an end-of-the-year retrospective of all the media we enjoyed so heeeeeeere we go.

July, July, July, what a busy month we've had. From L getting a new job to us running our first convention stall selling our art. We have truly been busy, but that has not stopped us from having fun with all kinds of media. Whether to relax or to research we watched a lot last month so lets talk about it.

Movies Movies are a good place to start. I've been trying to keep track of the movies we watched on Letterbox like I do with anime on MAL. I just like having a big list of all the things I've seen I can't help it XD. 

For my birthday we did a Gentleman-themed movie night. First, we watched The Gentleman a film I've been trying to get L to watch for ages and my birthday seemed like a great opportunity. And guess what she loved it. It's Guy Richie so you know the cinematography and editing are going to be fun a least. I didn't remember how homoerotic it was but I'm all for it. I think the gangsters should kiss. 

We also watched The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare... Also Guy Richie. It even had Henry Cavill but they couldn't save this story from being kinda meh. It sucks because I was looking forward to it but It just felt a little all over the place. You never really get to know any of the characters and the action felt excessive considering the real-life versions of these people managed to do this operation with only one injury. 

The last movie I can remember watching was Valerian And The City Of A Thousand Planets. Our hopes going in were so low but it was actually really awesome. The world and story are just so interesting and well-made. It feels like a passion project from the director. It's just plain fun times. 

TV

For the small screen, we watched The 8 show, A tv adaptation of two Manhwa Pie game and Money game. The show chose elements from both  to create a kind of mish mash of the ideas from both. I hadn't read them but L had so I got to turn and go "Omg did that happen in the Manhwa". I wouldn't want to spoil anything but if you're a fan of death games its very compelling. 

My main criticism of the show as a whole was that the violence in the latter half was actually really hard to watch. It felt excessive and unrealistic. You will watch a character get their head bashed in with a baseball bat multiple times and will be fine the next day. It gives it this kind of unrealistic uneasiness where you're real-world perception of how much damage the human body can take is confused for the sake of plot convenience and shock. 

L: It made some interesting adaptations and outright changes that were mostly good but it is very different to both manhwa. Which is a good thing. I've read it already so show me something cool you can do with the idea!

Anime

Anime was a large part of what we watched as usual. We have completely stepped off the seasonal train and as a result have been enjoying anime from all over... anyway we watched Dungeon Meshi. If you have seen our most recent video you know we love this show. It's genuinely a 10/10 and I can't wait for the next season. I don't want to be basic and make more videos on it but I kinda do. 

Shangri-La Frontier was another anime we brought up in the last video as it was just overflowing with passion and skill. We still haven't finished it with 2 episodes to go.

I Was Reincarnated as the 7th Prince so I Can Take My Time Perfecting My Magical Ability; was also fun but for very silly reasons. I can't sit here and claim it's inherently good but it was fun and easy to watch. Sometimes that's ok.

Lastly, for anime, we have Black Butler. omg, it's so fun. we're only 10 episodes into our rewatch at the moment but it's been about 10 years since I last watched it. The English accents in the dub are particularly awful I love it. 

Its interesting to look back on the anime we watched and see exactly how we went from watching these to writing the Passion and Skill video. I can see what elements of each show inspired what elements of the video. This is cool and fun and nice. 

Games

Don't worry we are nerds of the highest order so we played some games too. I've been playing a few in the last week or so. Star Ocean Divine Force, Orks Must Die 3 and Circus Electrique just to name a few. I've been ping-ponging back and forth between all of them. 

The big game of this month however has to be Spellforce 2. I played 3 and really enjoyed it but the jump back to 2006 graphics was a hurdle I had to vault and I'm glad I did. The game has a lot of interesting elements that they stripped out for the sequel. Unsurprising considering the game changed hands multiple times between the 2 games. It really feels like a classic CRPG with strategy elements instead of a bunch of strategy maps with some RPG-style quests for good measure. It was fun and just as I thought I was finishing it the game kept going. I have no idea where it's going to go next.

L has been playing the Demo for Blue Prince pretty religiously. I don't think ill see her again once the full game comes out but I won't say too much because I think there's a little video/strategy guide on the horizon. You should see the spreadsheet. 

L: Spreadsheet :3c 

Conc

If I could conclude this rambling blog post for July in one word I would say Expanding. Because our tastes are changing and expanding. I'm excited to see what I get to enjoy next month. 

Anyway, this blog post is more for us to store thoughts than anything substantial at the moment but if you enjoyed reading it let us know. If you want better-worded thoughts check out our YouTube videos and if I actually stick to this new idea see you next month.

[merwynsartblog]

marco x his partners headcanons fhdh

Marco x Kevin

-Actually very clingy to each other- I like to think if they are around the hold hands without thinking or kevin has a hand on his back and marco has a hand on his waist or whatever whatever

-Mostly spends time just cuddling and rambling- They can spend GOD DAMN HOURS talking- well mostly marco but still!!

-Kevin is the more calm one out of the two which is..oddly surprising lmao- Hes always making sure marco doesnt wonder off or do something stupid (kevin looked away from marco for a second and he broke his arm trying to jump over a fence smh.)

-Kevin for the first few weeks dating marco is very meh about him- BUT OMFG when he realizes "ok i do actually like him and hes super sweet-" hes just has this moment where he hanging out with marco and apologizing for being somewhat a lil asshole and he actually for the first time says "I love you very much" AND MARCO JUST A BIG GIGGLING MESS TRYING NOT TO CRY DHDJ

Marco X Radford

-Funny enough marco is a big listener to radford and just loves listening to him- even if he gives short "mhms" or hums he does pay attention to him and since he does he easily remembers radford favorite stuff and can easily read him lile a book-

-I ACTUALLY HC THEM IN THEIR FREETIMES THEY ARE VIDEO GAME STREAMERS!! RADFORD IS USUALLY THE GUEST STAR WHILE MARCO IS THE ONE PLAYING THE GAMES!! marco never played any games so radford thought it be sweet to just let him have fun!! He fucks marco up so easily with his jokes and shit-

-BOTH AFFECTION MONSTERS- THEY LOVE GIVING EACHOTHER KISSES AND HUGS EVEN IN PUBLIC- They arent even trying to show off they just that gay-

-CLOSE TO ROBERT AND JOHN BC OF THIS SOMWWHAT. hes very sweet to robert and sorta spoils him when he can- meanwhile he respects john so much! He doesnt steal him or jacks things and sorta see him as a weird father figure since i like to think john is very close to his family so hes like..somewhat like a father to them so ofc marco going to respect him!!

Marco X Streber

-PARTNERS IN CRIMEEE!! THEYVARE CHAPTIC LIL TROUBLE MAKERS!! where you think streber got it from??/silly

-Hc streber as a guy who loves crossdressing streber and marco would shop together for dresses and makeup and stuff like that!!

-Streber is a big old gift giver and it makes marco feels bad but streber always says "its fine! You give me lots of hugs! its only fair!" He loves the gifts he gets from streber and feels honored!

-Knows strebers coworkers and they are all very supportive of marco!! They actually sorta offered marco to work with them if he had free time next halloween! he actually took up the offer and scared some kids near the end of the tour- he was a scarecrow and was very still so kids walking around would assume hes a prop!! God he got some kids good-

Marco X Rick

-rick is very affectionate even if he doesnt seem like it!! He alwaus wrapped his arms around marco and resting his head in his hair just chilling-

-THEY ACT LIKE HUSBAND AND WIFE SO EASILY ITS CRAZY RHDJC legit its so fucking sweet

-Marco always picks up his partners but cant pick up rick- SO RICK BEING A TINY CHEEKY BASTA4D will pick him up sometimes and hold him bridal style and marco always freezes as he hides his head in his chest just embarrassed

-MARCO IS THE ONE TO SPOIL RICK A FUCK TON!! he alwyas trying to make him things and always taking him out in the woods to collect rocks and hang out with him!! he always smiles slightly when marco brings him oit and they have a day togehtwr ♡♡♡♡

anyways thats it for marco x wagegang imma ramble about today jdjdj

taglist: @totally-not-a-tickle-blog @jonesy-squish

[luveline]

dear jade,

Im 23 and I would say I’m doing ok the scheme of things. I moved to a new city and my job is meh and I have friends and it seems fine but I can’t help but feel lonely especially because I have a p rocky relationship with my family members and sometimes all I want is someone whose excited to see me and do errands with me. I like my friends but most of them r actually moving soon and I’m scared about having to try to make new friends and idk I guess I was wondering if you had any tips on feeling lonely bc I really want a bf but also the mature part of my brain knowing having a bf won’t fix anything per say.

Hey!

My tips for feeling lonely. I think I was a very lonely person for a long time, and I'll give you my advice rather than what a therapist or a professional might say, so please take it with a pinch of salt. EDIT : I'm not trying to say I know better than a therapist btw I don't just that you can find that everywhere so I wanted to be more personable

I think if you really want a boyfriend, you're right in thinking it won't fix everything, but I also don't think it's a bad idea. The want to be in a relationship is one that most people will experience in their lives, it's very natural, and of course lots of things can go wrong and you can end up very hurt, but I still think that looking for love and a partner to be with wouldn't fix everything but it would probably be a good thing. BUT. it is also very very important to have friends and family too. Friends are so hard😭 and they move away and even if you make new ones you won't know who they are, but I think the standards for friendship are kind of skewiff these days, so my advice to you is to try and make relationships with people that are casual in a sense, but honest and caring, too. I know it isn't easy, you can't just magically clap your hands and make it happen, and there's a balance to be struck between being forgiving with people but not wanting them to walk all over you and your boundaries. (Sorry this paragraph is a little behemoth but hopefully my main point is that a boyfriend won't fix things but it probably won't do you any harm to have love and intimacy in your life, but don't try to fill the gaps that friends and family are leaving with a boyfriend because it may leave you feeling worse (which I'm sure was your original point, sorry😭))

I'm sorry to hear about your rocky relationships with family and I certainly won't stand here and tell you to try and fix them because family can be impossible and hurtful and too much to deal with. I hope things get better with them but I also understand that they might not, and I want to tell you that that's okay! Family by blood is real but family can also be anything you want it to be, including friends or a partner or people in your community. It's tough though, and I'm sorry!

ANYWAYS you didn't actually ask for any of the above and I'm really sorry if what I've said so far is unsolicited or incorrect, I can't pretend to know every detail of your situation but I think i can understand how you're feeling, like things are fine but loneliness is still pervasive anyways

When I'm feeling really really really lonely, there are a couple of things I do. I talk to friends (and not to tell them I'm lonely, maybe just to send a video or something) and I don't mind admitting that I don't have tons of friends, but the very best one I've made was through the Internet, so I definitely recommend trying to make friends via the Internet with people who have your interests in common! Friends in real life are sometimes friends because we see them a lot, which isn't a bad thing (it's actually GOOD to be friends with people who are different from us) but often means that we can find ourselves a bit unsure of where we stand or how to keep the friendship going when they move away.

I do all the usual things the Internet tells you to do, too, because this stuff sucks but it really works, like taking a very hot shower or going for a walk. Sometimes it absolutely doesn't work and then you're just walking around feeling lonely and miserable though, but it's worth a try. sometimes we feel lonely because we realise how unhappy we are and that we don't have anyone who's worried about how unhappy we are, if that makes sense? Like a consequence of the human condition, we actually do want attention when we feel shitty and there's no crime in that.

But sometimes all the usual stuff doesn't work! When I was at my Loneliest and most depressed, where I really truly could not see a light at the end of the tunnel kind of situation, I turned to writing. It literally saved me and saved my life and made it one worth living (as someone who doesn't have very much ambition). I think that finding a hobby and trying to master it or at least trying to create can really do wonders for a lonely person because it gives you a sense of worth or a sense of purpose outside of personal relationships. I always tell people I think they should start writing but what I mean is that finding a way to express yourself or finding a way to make things that you can look at with pride is great.

But obviously one hobby isn't going to get rid of all your loneliness, and I don't think it necessarily has to. I was recently talking to someone about this kind of thing and we spoke about this quote from a poem by ocean zuong, "loneliness is still time spent with the world." You will feel loneliness at different points of your life for the rest of time and so will I, and it's going to be very painful at some points, but I think if we can try to look at loneliness as more neutral, we can feel lonely without putting pressure on ourselves to fix it. It would be very tiring for you if you were always expected to fix your own loneliness. Sometimes there's nothing you can do and im so sorry to say that and to hear about how you're feeling, because it's not fair. But loneliness isn't like hunger, there's no guarantee that you can make it better by doing any one thing, you just have to hope that the world is going to be kind to you. When it isn't, you have to be kind to yourself! Try to treat yourself as you'd treat someone else going through a hard time, get yourself a treat if you can and remember that just because you're lonely doesn't mean you deserve to be, you're a unique person with all these interesting things about you that I'm sure people are one day going to discover and love, I'm sure people already do!

[viilpstick]

Ok I'm feeling sick today so to distract me I might come to your inbox sometimes (I know u must have classes tho so like take ur time to answer these lmao)

What happens when your ocs try the orange peel theory on their partners👁️👁️

Viuna: Vil was so confused? Like... Why? After all, Yuuna don't like oranges 😭 But, he does it anyway.

"Vil-"

Immediately he embraced her figure endearing. They haven't seen each other all day, is most natural for him to do so. Whoever he feels her not doing the same so breaks the hug by pushing Yuuna by her shoulder to see what is in her hands. An simple orange...

"I thought you didn't liked it." Says Vil confusedly.

"Well, you know, I wanted to try it. Since the last time I did I was a kid." She sheepishly smile at him. "But, uhm... Could you peel it for me?"

"You don't know how to do it?" Vil asks and Yuuna shakes her head. He hums. "Well, alright. But, I will teach you how to do it. Follow me, darling." He takes her hand leading her to the kitchen.

Floyce: "Huh??? Why? Can't do it, pea puffer?" She wants to slap him. Of course Grace can do it, but she wants to test him... BUT HE IS SO UNROMANTIC AND SO UNAWARE OF THE THEORY.

"Floyd?"

Grace held the orange and a small bowl. She was unsure of how to make her boyfriend... Her dumbass boyfriend to get the right answer.

"Pea puffer!" He almost jumps on her before noticing the small bowl and the orange in the beastwoman's hands. "Huh? What is it?"

"An orange, I thought you were smarter than-" He puts a finger place in her mouth.

"Why is that here?" He corrects his question, smirking when noticing her cheeks warming up and tail swaying behind herself.

"I- Could you peel it for me?" Asks Grace.

"Why? Can't do it yourself, hm?" He teases her with an raised eyebrow and smug expression.

"Can you or can you not?" She bitterly asks again. "Please." Grace adds at the end.

"Meh. No." He turns away, laying back on her bed.

"Right." She says looking away, I mean, she could at least expect him to be annoying and not understanding that thing anyway.

But then, again, something grabs the bowl and orange.

"Okay." He starts to peel it off in the floor with the bowl between his legs. She hides, but the smile on her face is actually endearing.

Maizul: The first one to ask and who knews about it was the partner, not her. But yeah, Maizie just wanted to eat the orange, meanwhile Azul does it immediatly like "OH OKAY TIME TO PROVE MYSELF TO HER-" nah, she is just hungry and lazy

"Azul, are you busy?" Yes, in fact he is. But is Maizie who asked it so, whatever. She pulls out from her pocket an orange placing in his desk. "Can you peel it for me, pretty please?"

Damnit! Azul never thought she would use metaphors to ask him if he actually loves her. Okay, just peel it for her and everything will be fine.

"Sure, pearl!"

He almost throws himself on the desk to take the orange and peel it for her. He runs to the first place he can find something to cut it, annd done! Maizie takes the orange with a small kiss in his cheek thanking him.

Nailed it, Azul! Pity that she was just hungry...

Malline: Surprisingly who tested the theory, was Malleus not Adeline. The girl, whatsoever was confused- I mean, why tf the heir of briar village is asking her, to peel an orange-? But, who is she to deny it?

"Adeline?" Back to Rosantée, Adeline washes the dishes, unaware that her boyfriend decided to pay her a visit that day. "Good evening, dear." He hugs her from behind gently, making her almost drop the plate.

"Sevens!" She gasps being able to catch it. "Mal! You scared me." She places the last dish back into the sink to wash it.

"My apologies. Just wondering if you could do me an favor?" Malleus asks as Adeline puts turns the water off.

"Sure, what is it?" He pulls out the orange. "I don't get it."

"Can you peel it for me?"

Silence.

"Can't you do it yourself?"

"I can, but, I don't know. I wanted to see how you peel it."

Silence again.

"Uhmm...?" Adeline cleans her hands, putting her hair down. "I mean, okay." She takes the orange from his hand peeling for him...

Yes, Adeline knows about it. She just don't want him to know that she knows the theory. And I mean, it's Adeline.

---

What about yours characters?

[bandedbulbussnarfblat]

ok, so in this one fic that i'm gonna write, Louis and Lily are going to be Claudia's biological parents. just bc i wanna. but then i had this thought:

what if they actually were?

From what we know of the shows timeline Claudia is born in 1903. Papa de Pointe du Lac (I refuse to call him Daddy du Lac bc what the internet did to the word daddy. like, I'm from the south y'all. That's what I call my dad/father/old man. Or dickhead occasionally, but like, affectionately. Whoops, I'm rambling.) dies sometime in 1905.

I can imagine he's been sick for awhile, if only because the de Pointe du Lac's seem like the kind of family to have enough money to afford pro-longed health care. Hold on a sec.

26. That's the number you're wondering about, btw. How old Louis would be when Claudia was born. I know some of y'all might be trying to do the mental math, and imma save you bc math is evil. (we aren't supposed to tell you this working in education, but it's just like the worst. you have to stack numbers in your head and think about only one thing for a really long time--and i'm adhd in case you couldn't tell.)

Anyway, back to where I was. Up until a certain point, Louis could put off having had a serious girlfriend, or been seen visiting the brothels. First off, he's a good Catholic boy, so he gets a little leeway. And of course, there's Paul he's gotta look after. Then his daddy gets sick, so he's got shit to manage.

But a certain point he starts to feel overwhelmed, and he's at that age where he expected to start looking to settling down. So he does what all men at that age do to let off steam, and he gets a sex worker.

maybe there was something special about lily at the get go, or maybe louis just chose at random. but he got lily and they fucked. it might have been a sad sort of fucking, but you know, louis gave it his best. (he might even have enough enough of a gentleman to see that they had a happy ending. it's just the polite thing to do.)

and maybe he decides to really vent about what's bothering him. and the sex was meh, but the talking was nice. and over time, they faze out the fucking portion altogether. and lily becomes more than just a sex worker he pays for companionship, but a confessor, a priest to confess to all that he can't to his other.

but claudia could have been conceived during one of those earlier visits where louis like, had to establish his straightness. it would have been easy to hide in the early months before lily started to show. and she could have easily said another client got her pregnant. But like, in the hypothetical, she could have been pregers with louis' baby, birthed it and left it with whatever family member she could get to take it. aka the mean auntie.

(now like, irl, she'd be like, grabbing this opportunity by the throat. but this is the hypothetical, so roll with me.)

lily wouldn't want to tell louis she was pregnant with his child. she thought he'd try to 'do the right thing' and marry her, and the idea of her and her child being looked down upon by the rest of the family disgusted her. so she never told him. but by then she probably figured out louis was gay, and she did not want to be his beard indefinitely, having to stay all loyal and true to louis while he fucked guys

so like papa du lac dies and now lily can't just pop out like, surprise, i'm his baby mama. except you know, in the slang for the era. so lily keeps claudia hidden. and means to eventually one day tell louis.

(and you know, being the only girl that Louis sees, people probably see him as like his--jfc, idk how to convert this from trailer trash, but it's like where if you're with a guy and living together so many years legally you're married. except you're not it's just about--nope. I'm not going do it and go off on a tangent. Anyway, it's like whatever the cultural approximation is to that.)

but then there's this white french dude sniffing around her man who isn't technically her man but she's the closest thing to a therapist he's got and is also his trailer-trash-wife. so like, she analyzes the threat and works out the situation. Claudia can be Louis' daughter he never knew about. Lily can be his kept woman, or she could take some money and run away. It depended on whether he wanted Claudia to himself and lestat, or if he wanted to share with her. or if he wants claudia at all.

she lestat reads her mind when he visits her one night, and is like, fuck i do not want to have kids. so he kills her bc hey, if she's dead, no problem. (or maybe he vamps her in agreement that she never see louis again and goes somewhere far away to start a new life. i know it doesn't make sense, but i like to imagine a world where lily lived. escapism is fun sometimes)

is this theory insane? yes? but is it impossible? no!

(I use this as reference a lot. But mostly the pdf version i have downloaded bc my internet is a fickle bitch sometimes. So it's probably, like behind on updates with the new trailers.)

[hindisoup]

I've done some Googling and I've self-diagnosed having reached the feared, the infamous Language Learning Plateau.

Some signs I've noticed:

I get fewer spontaneous ideas for language learning. I still get them but less frequently and feel less inspired by them. Before, my mind was often bombarded with "Oh, let's do a vocab challenge! Let's read a book! Let's try to watch something without subtitles!" and now it's more like "Meh, I guess I can do that".

Language learning routines I used to enjoy a lot feel more like a task than enjoyable me-time. Stuff like organizing and tinkering with my Anki decks, vocabulary lists, grammar notes, etc.

I cannot see a clear goal in my learning. I mean, I say it's that I can enjoy media and arts in my target language quite fluently - but what does that mean?

And based on the stuff I read about this, it's pretty simple. Our learning slows down once we reach the intermediate level and become somewhat comfortable with the language in everyday contexts. Our brain is not getting that positive learning brain rush as frequently anymore, or the feeling is not as strong.

And I guess the risk is here that once we have enough vocabulary and grammar to work around the difficult parts (like explaining a word we don't know instead of, you know, looking it up and learning the actual word, or using just the three tenses we know and avoiding the more difficult ones) we fall in the danger of becoming stagnant.

The cures suggested that I found and am willing to try

1. Identify problem areas and define my goal

My biggest hurdles in Hindi, as of now, are remembering the genders of nouns and using word endings consistently (I can easily say or write मेरी नाम है even if I know very well that नाम is masculine just because I happen to be a female), and learning the more complex verbal structures, especially the nuances between past tenses. And even if I enjoy reading prose, I very much want to develop my skills in understanding the everyday spoken language of native speakers.

My goal is to be able to pick up a novel or short story and read a chapter comfortably - I can grasp its main characters and the way the story is developing even if I cannot understand every word. Or that I can listen to a news broadcast and understand the main points of the story - who, what, where, why - accurately.

2. Reframe my thinking

I've said that I'm happy to make slow progress. I am enjoying the journey. But now I need to own up to those words - up to this point, I've sometimes felt like sprinting. Once I learned certain prefixes and suffixes, I felt like I was gathering new vocabulary like a sponge. Slowing down is okay, it doesn't mean I've lost anything. It means I've come quite far already. There are probably more things I know (grammar wise that is, let's not bring the immensity of Hindi vocabulary in to this, please) than don't know by this point. There's still a brain rush to be experienced in learning more advanced stuff, I just need to find the right methods.

3. Try something new

I have a good routine, but I've been doing similar things for too long. I plan to find some new podcasts (recommendations welcome!), series and reading materials. So far I've used stuff that I've found available, but maybe at this point, I can try finding material on topics that interest me. Why watch a romcom if that's not my thing? I've got new pen pals now, which is a start.

Ok, I'm off to update my to-do list. I kind of feel inspired now!

Sources: x, x

[dayspreceding]

The Thing (2011)

Spoiler Warning

Ok Near as I can tell, this movie is not very well liked by most people, and I can definitely understand why. I watched it a couple of nights ago and frankly I wasn’t taking notes, so we’re going off my memory here.

A lot of the complaints I’ve seen about this movie are about it relying on CGI over practical effects, which is a dumb thing to complain about in my opinion. If you want to be upset because the CGI wasn’t “good enough”, that’s one thing, but CGI and Practical effects are TOOLS, there are pros and cons to both, and if you can’t get a practical effects team to provide the quality you’re looking for, there’s nothing wrong with using CGI. That said, I really enjoyed the CGI in this prequel, though maybe they went a little overboard with the Thing’s abilities. In the prequel, literally moments after waking up, the creature is strong enough to LEAP through a ceiling, destroy it, and keep on moving. In the Russell Thing, the creature had a feeling of NEEDING to be stealthy because it was gathering strength, so a lot of the movie felt justified. In the prequel, its practically unstoppable in how strong it is, to the point that I kept asking myself why it didn’t just start attacking people outright. I have a theory about that, but I’ll get to it shortly, The Thing is frustratingly inconsistent, ranging from WILDLY short-sighted to near genius mastermind in its deception and behavior, and there’s never an explanation given for it. It lays traps, misdirects, and deceives effortlessly, but then seemingly gives up on all of that to try and kill someone for no reason, to the point where its VERY clear sometimes its attacking just because the PLOT demands something happen, even if it makes no sense. What comes to mind very specifically is the the helicopter scene, where it is comforting an injured person who in no way suspects him, and then LITERALLY the next second, attacks and destroys the chopper...for NO reason. It then goes on to mirror the pilot, Budget Russell, and spend the rest of the movie ACTIVELY hurting its own plans and efforts, before being surprise revealed to have been a creature the whole time. There’s no build up to this, the way Kate realizes this is never highlighted or discussed...it just...happens, because she needs to disappear in the snowfield near the ship. I like the movie...but it does have problems that could have easily been avoided with a few more writing changes. From what I’ve come to understand, this movie does suffer from some studio interference, but I don’t really know where this starts and ends, so its a meh quality movie for what feels like no reason. All of this though, does bring me to the ultimate reason I’m writing this. The creature itself. The Russell Thing is given no real explanation, very few details to really make it make sense in the context of the universe. Everything we see and hear about it ‘kinda’ makes sense, and that’s excellent for a horror monster.  Understanding things makes them less scary, which undercuts the movie, however...we do get some clues. It operates like a virus, corrupting on a cellular level.  It is actively trying to get out of the Antarctic, and doesn’t really seem to need to ‘eat’ in a way we would describe it. The prequel builds on these qualities, and it feels like it adds more information as well. In the prequel, the creature is actively trying to reach its ship, a seemingly undamaged, flightworthy vehicle that ‘crashed’ on earth over 100,000 years ago. That None of that makes sense. Why is the creature’s behavior so inconsistent? How did it crash without damaging its ship? Why does it entirely abandon the task of escaping to chase Kate when it could have just sent a part of itself out to get her? Why doesn’t Budget Russell (I genuinely can’t remember his name) just betray her when he’s saving her? The answer is obviously plot holes, but for the sake of brevity, lets follow this line of logic. All of our evidence points to a single idea for me, and that is that the creature ISN’T the alien that landed here. Its the virus that infected it. The creature being a virus, rather than the alien, makes a lot of sense and explains a LOT about the weird choices it makes. -Mutagenic properties that extend to corrupting even DNA -Erratic Behavior -Fear of Fire regardless of form -Compulsion to spread The only thing that’s inconsistent with this is how it actually performs the mimicry, with it sometimes incubating a clone inside of itself over a long period of time, to it seemingly changing people cell by cell over a RAPID period of time, but even that could be explained by the virus becoming familiar with human DNA and getting faster because of it. That also explains why it took so long to appear as a dog in the prequel, the original virus that infected the dog wasn’t accustomed to its DNA and needed longer to change. The reason the alien LANDED here on earth was most likely to avoid spreading the infection among its species. Earth at that time wouldn’t have had any intelligent life worth mentioning, so leaving an infection here wouldn’t have impacted any societies, and landing in the most remote possible location would only act as an extra layer of security. The alien tried to save its people as it was dying, and I’d argue that if we got to explore the ship, we’d probably see more of its kind, dead or transformed throughout the ship. So in conclusion, the alien rocks, humans are paranoid and foolish, and writers don’t work well with studios sticking their fingers in the pie.

[draconixiaa]

tired but i'll do a bit of this (will be a bit rambly:D)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

24,, wow not bad

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

165.5k wow thats a lot,, most of it comes from one tho; everything else are shortfics

3. What fandoms do you write for?

DSMP and ive just started a bit of genshin at the behest of my Tartaglia-obsessed irl and he's kinda cool but like for 95% of my other fics its all cdream ahahahhh(dies)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

"Consequences" tops the charts obviously bc its my one and only longfic and it was written during the peak of dsmp and man id link it bc i love my storyline (cdream obviously gets messed up in prison but then gets a healing arc) there but at the same time i feel like the writing had too many grammar mistakes and could be better so nahh

"North Star to Freedom" is one im actually really proud of, like obviously the writing could be better bc ive improved, but i just like it and id deffo rewrite it too if i had time or steal it into an original fic (premise is that cdream escapes prison with the rebibe book and oh lord my lingo anyways (spoilers) he dies and he gives techno book)

"Persevere" is third, wow that's a long time ago, its alright, i like it in general, but it feels almost cheesy. idk. i like it, but i dont like it. its not mixed feelings, but eh. anyways, something about cdream getting captured by the egg which is about to take over the world but he sacrifices himself to cleanse it. the most acute thing i rember about it is that its a 3parter

"Coup de Grace" ok wth i didnt expect this to be on there it was a small little cdream suffering in prison and cphil comes over, sees him in pain, and cough relieves him of it, and i dont like the writing in a specific part of it, but i like it in some other parts, so eh

"turn the claret tides" whoops i forgot what this one was about ok i glanced through the doc its ctechno getting cdream out of prison wow that title was really vague but he gets the letter and things went on.. it was inspired by another fic and happened during the hype of the prison arc which is kinda cool

(man im looking at the amount of fics i want to rewrite but it aint happening sadge)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Sometimes, most of the times nowadays, if it particularly made my day or it has something deep and insightful or literally makes any observation on my fic. sometimes im just too tired to answer,, maybe laziness is a part of it too, but i stare and its like,, i cant generate a response . but nowadays, i do it most of the times bc i appreciate my commenters :D

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

my recent fics mostly have happy endings, but all my pre-like, mid 2023 fics were all sad sad sad. they all ended in cdream dying, one way or the other. so idk which ones the saddest now its been too long,, the one i personally think is the saddest is one that i like, was listening to sad music to, the song being 'sociopath,' an orchestral piece (or was it piano?)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

consequences

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

once on consequences bc that was max cdream apologists vs inniters era

9. Do you write smut?

nop never ever ever

10. Do you write crossovers?

dream + tartaglia is one i wrote in fudging october that i am still trying to find time to continue

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

prob not, if there is, then i wouldnt know of it

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope, if there was, i also dont know of it

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

wow thats crazy that i havent, but idk, teamwork and coordination just go meh when i only share my interests with online people

14. What‘s your all-time favorite ship?

idk i dont do ships but my fav friendship is dream + techno or dream + punz

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

all my chapter continuations except the tartaglia + dream one i Need to finish that. but also the palace of stone idea will Never Ever get written

16. What’s your writing strengths?

descriptions idk they go lengthy but ive practiced with them a lot so ive gotten kinda good

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

dialogue, pacing, idk literally everything, i can prob improve on anything and every aspect of my writing rn, and i just need to practice more

19. First fandom you wrote for?

DSMP lmao

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

consequences i love the storyline + ending of that one even if the writing couldve been better

uhh tagging? idk if theres anyone that doesnt overlap wiht people whove been tagged b4 les see: @milktearosethorn , @victoriacoffee , ,, oh theres only two ok well, have fun if u decide to do this!

[matan4il]

Not an actual reluctant shippers story but more of I gave this show so many outs story. Listen I just love, love and I ship by nature. The moment I saw those 2 I was like I need them to kiss, then I met Chris and I was like I need them to cuddle on the couch together. I would never not ship them but I half heartedly gave the show liency I may not have in the past. My thoughts over 5 years watching them ranged alot

I'm the beginning I though maybe they just keep them single best bros, helping a single buddy out. Honestly it wouldn't have failed. This show already has 3 very popular couples. An ensemble show doesn't need 5. You could have kept ambiguous flow while throwing in how was your date dialogue and the audience would roll with it.

Then sometimes I thought Ryan and Oliver wanted it because they push and acted it so well. Let's also be real they don't have a say, if the network wants it they get it. Ryan absolutely sold nothing with Anna, and Oliver was meh with Taylor. So I was like OK the network is homophobic?

Then for a period ok maybe they will have off screen girlfriends we occasionally see while still getting them in the glory??

At this point l though it's just hilarious if they aren't together at the end. If you end this with them married off to other people I'm just gonna rewrite it in my head. A year later they both had had to many sex dreams about the other divorced their wives and opened a sure shop in Peru with Christopher

But yeah the moral of the story I gave this show so many outs to dilute them and all they ever did wad make them stronger. Even noncanon they are more connected then some Canon couples on shows.

Hi Nonnie, and thank you for this ask! I always love a fellow hopeless romantic. We're make quite the club (and I'd vote @daphnesvalley to head it, since she was the first one, I believe)! ;D

Honestly, all of this. I mean, I have said the same thing as the last sentence of your ask in at least two of my meta posts (such as my 501 meta). Because it's SO true, it just drives me up a wall! And I have also said it repeatedly: no other Love Interest at this point can compete with the almost 5 seasons of build up that Buddie have had so far, which means no LI they get for either Buck or Eddie at this point will be satisfactory for many viewers. Possibly even most, since it seems a lot of casual viewers have also picked up on the Buddie vibes at one point or another. And for me personally it was a done deal the second Eddie put his thumb on Buck's pulse point, on his VEIN OF LIFE, looked him in the eyes and in the most earnest way possible said, "There's nobody in the world I trust with my son more than you." For Eddie, who is so thoroughly Christopher's dad, there is no greater love statement than that. The guardianship reveal in 414 was an expansion and practical implementation of that statement. Yeah, I knew at the end of 303 that I'm doomed and I would never be able to see Buck and Eddie with anyone else except the other one. Like you said, if that's not how canon wraps it up? That just means canon stopped before the real end of their story. Because those two are BOUND to end up together, fully raising Chris as his married (and sickeningly in love) dads.

Hope you have a great day, lovely! As always, my ask tag. xoxox

[amynchan]

So people talk about extroverts adopting introverts all the time; however, it was recently brought to my attention that I, an introvert, have adopted extroverts in the past.

Adoption by extroverts takes, like, a few seconds. Adoption by introverts, on the other hand, can take weeks or months.

Imagine, for a sec, that you're in class. You've been in this class for a while, and you're just... chilling out, talking with your friends. You notice everyone in the class, including the loner in the back who honestly seems to just want to be left alone. Ok, cool, they can do them. It's not exactly the best day you've had, but it's not the worst. It's fine. It's fine, it's fine, it's totally fine.

Class goes on, you guys all do your own work, you get some notes from some of your friends asking to hang out, and life goes on. You're not really in a mood to hang out, and you kinda want to be left alone. You wave everyone off, and for a second, you're by yourself.

Well, except for the loner in the back. They've stayed in their corner with their book, and it doesn't look like they'll leave, but they're not bugging you or anything, so... meh. You leave them be.

It takes you a few moments, but you manage to pull yourself out of your funk. You think about talking to the loner in the back, but then you decide against it. Probably best not to bug them. Then you move on with your day. No big deal.

A few weeks later, something similar happens. Not the best day, kinda worse than the last, and you don't take any of the notes that are being handed to you by the people around you. Everyone else leaves class at the end, and you just... you need a moment or two. You set your head down on the desk and shut your eyes.

You just need to relax for a little bit. Just a bit of rest, and you'll be fine.

Thunk.

A soft sound, probably not even intended to be heard. You look up, and the loner of the class is leaving. When you look at your desk again, there's something there.

There isn't a note. It's just a small baggie filled with goldfish crackers.

Weird. Ok.

You take the goldfish, and you eat them. They're not drugged or magic or anything, but they're nice. The crunching helps with your mood, oddly enough.

The next day, you make it to class with your usual group, just a little bit before class actually starts, as is normal. The loner is where they usually are, book in hand and--now that you notice it--a little bag of goldfish crackers. They're eating them.

"Hey, gimme a sec," you tell your friends, and you make your way over. You think they wouldn't like a huge group of people by them right now--or ever, honestly, but right now seems like a good thing to start with. When you get close enough, you're not quite sure what to say, but it's not like that's stopped you before.

"Hey," you blurt, and the loner startles for a second. They turn to you. They don't look scared. Just a little disoriented, but still. "You okay?"

"Uh, yeah," they say. There's no stutter or anything to indicate that they're shy or anything. They blink a few times, and the disorientation goes away. "Just got lost in my book. It happens sometimes. What about you? You okay? You looked kind of rough yesterday."

You're... not really sure why they noticed, but they gave you goldfish, so... You shrug.

"It wasn't the best day, but it got better after the goldfish. Thanks for that, by the way."

"No problem," they say. They look... pretty comfortable talking with you, actually. For some reason, you always thought they were shy. "I think your friends are waiting for you."

You turn, and your friend group is staring at you. You grin sheepishly and start to slink away. Before you get too far, you turn back to the loner, who's kept their eye on you.

"Why did you give me the goldfish?" you ask. "It was nice, but... it's not like we ever talked or anything. You didn't have to give me the rest of your snack. You had half a bag left. That could have lasted you, what, another class or two?"

The other shrugged, still comfortable in their seat. "You respected my space."

"Huh?"

"Few weeks ago," said the loner. The day comes back to you very vaguely. It's been a while since then! You've slept! "Sometimes, when people are upset, they stay after class. Then they get better, and they notice me, and they try to talk to me even when I'm reading. Not sure why; it's really awkward. You didn't, though. You kept to yourself, I saw you notice me, and then you let me be. It's one of the nicest things someone's done for me."

That.... sounds very backwards to you, honestly.

"So I guess I just... kept an eye out in case you needed something." They finally look away from you, down at their book. It's a hard cover, and they start fiddling with the front cover, moving it back and forth with gentleness. "Figured it'd be nice to be friends or something."

You stare, just for a moment, and wonder about how backwards it feels. You're usually the kind of person who just goes up and asks to be friends. To wait in the long haul like that...

Well, it's just not your style. If you want a friend, you usually ask. And why fix what isn't broken?

"You wanna hang out sometime?" you ask, and the other lets the hard cover fall safely on the pages. You look at the book and grin. "Tell me about what you're reading or something?"

You've never been interested before, but this person doesn't seem bad. You honestly haven't really given the other person that much thought before. They do a little quirk of a smile, like they're trying not to laugh.

"Sure," they say. "After class?"

Honestly, it's not like you don't have the time. You grin.

"Sure."

You go back to your friends, joining in the chatter with ease, when one of them asks, "Hey, did you just adopt an introvert?"

You look back at your new friend, and you find that they're lost in their book again. you laugh, amused at the bizarre turn of events.

"I think," you say with a grin, "that the introvert just adopted me."

[tracingpapier]

watched the first ep of sonic prime, my thoughts below!

umm i do get kinda critical about it so if you don't wanna hear that then just skip this one i guess! also slight spoilers maybe? i'm writing for readers who have already seen the first episode.

writing/plot

okay so first and foremost the first episode, shattered, did NOT have to be that long. i feel like very little happened or was communicated given the length of the episode, in the sense that they spent so much time reiterating that "wow, sonic's in a different place!". i get that it's a kids show, but i doubt kids need the premise beat into their heads this heavily. sonic spends so much time just running around questioning everything that's going on to the point where it's redundant. i think that could've worked if it came out of a reluctance to accept the change in reality around him, but i definitely think it came off more as him just being kind of... dumb? i don't know how many of the games are canon to this show, but we've seen this exact kind of set-up in the storybook games and to my memory he was a lot quicker to pick up on "oh, my friends are different people here" than in shattered. i feel that sonic trying to get nine to "remember" him was way too drawn out.

it's worth mentioning that sonic x does have a really similar premise: sonic gets separated from his friends and ends up in a whole new world. although the world in shattered is much more dystopian, both worlds are pretty immediately hostile to sonic, and yet i feel that sonic x had a much stronger opening. (and, like, i'm not the biggest sonic x guy myself. it has nostalgic qualities for sure, but i'm not a "stan", y'know?) i think a lot of prime's pacing issues just stem from the fact that this opening episode is 45~ minutes long, having too much run time to fill with minimal set-up. i'm anticipating that the rest of the episodes, being shorter, will be better paced!

the voice actors were fine! deven christian mack gave a performance very similar to roger craig smith, sometimes i thought it might actually be him haha. i thought he was good (if you like roger's take on sonic, you'll like deven's)! everyone else's performances were satisfactory, but nothing to write home about as of yet. knuckles' voice sounded forcibly deep sometimes? and sometimes the deliveries could be meh, but other than that everything was fine.

okay, i have to say it: the dialogue was very mid-tier, sometimes even downright bad. it really seemed like they were trying to go for snappy, quirky dialogue but oh boy it did not land for me personally.

i really hope they don't go with a "sonic has to learn to be a good friend" narrative that they kind of seemed to be setting up. i feel like one of sonic's defining character traits is that he's, like, already a good friend? i'm not really interested in a narrative where he has to learn to "listen to his friends better". he already does that just fine in other media.

quick note: i'm definitely interested to see where they go with shadow's character! i am so happy that they're not just framing him as "evil" immediately. or like overly dickish. thank god.

also baby eggman was funny. i like his silly baby mech.

animation

i liked the animation! very fluid and nice in some parts. i'm personally not super big on 3D animated tv shows --i find that it can be hard to pull off good-looking 3D with a tv budget-- but i didn't mind it! the models i'm not entirely sold on, but i think it looked good overall. i like that they weren't afraid to push the expressions. i think i would've liked it more had they gone with something that looked more akin to the bad guys movie that came out recently, but again, i'm sure there's a budgetary difference there, just based on assumption.

ok that's all for now! i'm hoping things get a little better as it goes! also please keep in mind that i am quite literally Just Some Guy on the internet sharing his thoughts about a cartoon for children. my opinion on this only has as much meaning as you give it. if you like it that's totally fine and i'm happy you enjoyed the show! please keep that in mind before taking to the notes and typing up a reply :,)

tl;dr i think the show has a solid premise and an okay start, and i'm hoping the show gets better as it goes (and with less run-time to fill lol)!