#iwaizumi angst

[eggyrocks]

bites -> h. iwaizumi

now playing: the chamber pot was full by iris bilinsky

main masterlist

tags: iwaizumi x gn!reader, hurt/comfort

word count: 3.3k

warnings: illusions to childhood trauma, destructive coping mechanisms, unstable relationship, arguments, abandoment, death of a family member, language, 3rd person pov, they/them pronouns for reader, not proofread

minors dni & other rules

an: if no one else got me, i bet on losing dogs got me. can i get an amen

It’s easier to bite than it is to be bitten.

And when the first few years of your life leave you with angry, ragged bite marks all over your body, the imprints of familiar teeth disfiguring your skin, it’s something you learn quickly. You’d do anything to stop it. You’d present your neck in submission. You’d scatter at the sight of bared teeth. You’d eventually start biting back.

The train rocks them slightly, their shoulders drifting just a touch left, and then just a touch right. The low noises of the train pulling forwards on the track are blocked out by the headphones on their head, soft and sweet music in their ears. The sky is rich and dark, an empty basin untouched by the lights of skyscrapers and phone screens. It’s nice, almost. Peaceful.

They’re not quite used to the city yet, even though it’s been years. Sometimes, in the morning, when their mind is awake, but their eyes are still closed shut and the sunlight is turning their eyelids a bright orange, they’re afraid that they’re back home. That they will open their eyes and be there. Where it’s quieter, but the buzz of cicadas was constant. Back home, where every noise was a threat, and every threat made their spine curl inwards.

The noises of the city around them are their first comfort. Noise isn’t something to be feared, here. When they hear it, the voices of strangers and rumbling of the subway beneath them float up into their open window, they can finally open their eyes, and feel at ease.

Steadily, the train eases into a stop. Their eyes drift towards the sign, and note their stop is still further down the line, that they’re still nowhere near as close to home as they would like to be.

Today was their mother’s funeral. They didn’t go. They cried, and then felt like they had no right to. They drank a bottle of something that made their throat burn, and then hurled the glass bottle against the wall, just so they could watch it shatter. And when they left, not even bothering to lock the door behind them, the shards were still scattered across the hardwood floor, reflecting the sunlight that poured in through the window.

It's been a day of idling wandering. Of trying so desperately not to think of the one thing that has been on their mind. A day of trying to become numb. A fleshy and pliable mound of nothing, free of bite marks, unbothered by the cicadas.

Their body is tired and their mind worn, eyes red and puffy, cheeks stained with tears. They just want to go home. To step over the glass and wake up to noise and pretend that their mother isn’t dead or alive, but just a faded, blurry memory that could be real, or might not be.

Vibrations from their pocket drag them out of their thoughts. They clear their throat as if they’re going to speak, but they know they’re not going to answer. It doesn’t matter who’s calling. There’s nothing they need to say.

Hajime.

They sniffle and clear their throat again. And then, they place their phone back in their pocket, letting it ring, hoping that he will give up after he gets their voicemail the first time.

When they first met Iwaizumi Hajime, they had a school uniform and a bag full of contraband. Loose stolen cigarettes, water bottles filled with clear alcohol, a handful of lighters that could barely produce a flame.

It was dark, and classes had let out hours ago, but yet they lingered. Wandering on campus, trying not to be seen by anyone else that might still be lingering. The wind kept blowing out the lighter, and they were struggling to keep the tip of the cigarette red. They leaned up against the outside of a building, focused on the heat on the tips of their fingers.

“What are you doing?”

They didn’t flinch. Getting caught never made them flinch. They were used to it, at this point. Used to being the delinquent, the one always in trouble. The one who caused problems. What was one more issue. What was another problem. They turned their head to face the person who called out, lip already furled up in a snarl.

It was some relief to them to see that it wasn’t anyone of authority. Not really. Just two dickheads from one of their sports teams. They recognized one. Oikawa Tooru. Pretty and imposing, adored by all. It was impossible not to know who he was, even if you tried. And they tried.

The second one, they didn’t recognize. The only thing they remember about him from that night is how they looked at them. Frowning slightly, head tilted. Not looking disgusted like his friend did. Not looking scared or worried or uncomfortable like all the other looks they were used to getting. He looked at them in a way that was unfamiliar. In a way that made them take a step back.

They had fixed their glare on Oikawa. “None of your fucking business,” they called back to him, voice as nasty as it always was, and lighter finally catching the end of their cigarette, tip cherried.

There was this look Oikawa gave them. One that made them want to snarl and snap their jaw like a dog. One that told them so clearly that he thought he was better than them. That he was a figure of superiority, and they were filth to him.

He didn’t say anything else, though. His friend nudged him with an elbow and gave him one look. Then they were off, walking away as if nothing had happened. As if they heard none of your fucking business and accepted it earnestly.

And they were relieved to be alone again.

They had noticed pretty quickly, though, that the friend, the one with the look, was hard to avoid after that. He didn’t say anything to them, not for a while. But he kept an eye on them. Head turning to look at them in class, not bothering with discretion. He always found them after classes, hiding somewhere on campus.

Eventually, they learned his name. Eventually, he started asking if he could walk them home. Iwaizumi asked seven times before they said yes.

Their eyes were on the ground, watching Iwaizumi’s stride, and how it matched with theirs. Their hand gripped tightly on the strap of their bag. “Why’d you want to walk me home so bad?” they had asked, breaking a long stretch of silence.

Iwaizumi shrugged. He didn’t look at them. “I don’t know. I just want to. No harm to it, so just let me, alright?”

So they did.

Every night, after they avoided going home for as long as possible and Iwaizumi was sweaty and out of breath from practice, they walked home. He would always stand back and watch as they opened the door and closed it behind them. Then, Iwaizumi would turn around and walk back in the direction they came from.

Iwaizumi became a lot of things to them. Too many to list off. It was overwhelming to think about, sometimes. They way that he became so intwined with their life that it was hard to remember what it was like before he was in it.

He made life easier, for them. Iwaizumi would laugh and it would make them smile. They woke up in the morning and their first thought was not to listen for the potential creak of footsteps outside of their door, but it was of Iwaizumi and his crooked grin and the way his voice sounded over the phone. And when things got hard, they would close their eyes and grit their teeth and endure, thinking of how it would all be okay once they could sneak out the window and slip into Iwaizumi’s.

His fingers were running along their scalp, weaving between the roots of their hair and a thin line of spit connected their lips. It broke when he opened his mouth to say, “I love you,” for the first time.

At the time, I love you didn’t seem like enough. Because Iwaizumi was more than just someone to love. He made breathing easier. He dragged his teeth along the skin of their neck and left bite marks that meant something new. They said it back in a voice that sounded like a strangers, and they meant it. But it never felt like enough. Not for Iwaizumi.

And then, after two years of a love that felt like it took up all the air in the room, he left. Iwaizumi left.

They weren’t mad. It wasn’t anger or rage. It was this heartbreak that felt like nausea. This cramping, pounding pain in the chest that doubled them over, that made them shake. This desperation to cling to him and this internal begging to him, to the universe, to anyone, for it to not be true. For him to stay, by their side, where they thought he was supposed to be.

But it was true. Iwaizumi was leaving. Going to a different country without them. Going to live a different life without them. Going to become a new person without them. And it didn’t matter how sweetly he delivered the news, how he held onto them as he did. It didn’t make it hurt less.

Hurt dogs bite. They snap their jaws out of fear of getting hurt worse. And that was all they were ever taught to do.

He’s been back for over a year, now. Living in the same city as them. Orbiting the same circles as them. Iwaizumi’s different now. They’re different now. But it didn’t take long after his return for them to collide again. In bars. In coffee shops. In rooms with locked doors.

Every time they do, they feel like they can forgive him for leaving. When they’re deep into the night together or there’s alcohol in their veins or Iwaizumi’s kissing them like he used to. It’s in those moments they feel like they can be together, like they were. But then when their thoughts get clearer and the sun rises, they remember how the abandonment felt, and how they never truly got over it. They remember how they could never, ever forget, and certainly could not forgive. And they bite.

The train stops again. The doors open, and no one steps off. No one steps on. Iwaizumi left a voicemail. They don’t listen. They don’t want to hear his voice. But they look at the transcription of his words. Where are you? Please call me. Don’t do this, okay? Please.

When he calls again, they swipe the notification away, determined to ignore him, determined not to find comfort in him again. The tip of their thumb hits taps on their messages, scrolling through their dozens of unread texts. They have some from Iwaizumi, which they ignore. There’s plenty from distant relatives, grandparents, siblings. They’re full of admonishments and curses and lectures.

Some are nice, from friends, some acquaintances, wishing them well and giving awkward, unsure condolences. They have one from Oikawa.

9:12 PM: Stop doing this to him.

It was always up and down with Oikawa. He never thought them worthy enough of Iwaizumi and was always quick to point out their mistakes and flaws and issues. But they would always remember the night Oikawa had drunkenly confessed to them after Iwaizumi’s return that he hopes it works out for the both of them. That Iwaizumi was better with them around. That they just need to get their shit together.

They sigh and pocket their phone again. It did little to help.

For the rest of the ride, they ignored the constant calls from Iwaizumi, and let the voicemails pile up, until there was no more space for them.

He’d given up by the time they reached their stop, and the sun had fully dipped behind the horizon. They step out of the station and onto the street, one song playing on a loop, and walk lazily back towards their apartment. It’s an early summer night, the air pleasant, not too sticky with humidity. They can feel the substances drain from their veins as they start to gain some sense of clarity.

Their shoulders are drooped and feet dragging by the time they reach their front door. Sloppily, they push their key in, missing the first two times, before they push their hip into the door, ready to stumble into bed and sleep so long they forget about the fact that their mother is dead.

Once they stagger into the kitchen, though, they freeze. He’s there. Iwaizumi is there, one hand holding a trash bag, the other pressing a phone to his ear. “-yeah, no I’ll call you back. They just got here.”

He hangs up then, slipping his phone into the pocket of his jeans. They stand there, frozen at the sight of him. There’s no shattered glass bottle on the floor. There’s no stains of alcohol on the wall. There is just Iwaizumi, exhausted.

Before they can even full process his presence, he’s dropping the trash bag on the ground and walking towards them, arms extending and pulling them tightly into his chest. And it’s in his embrace, suddenly encased in a familiar warmth and smell, that they snap back into reality. They squirm, palms of their hands pressed flat against his chest and shoving him away. “What are you doing?” they ask, step back and away from him.

Iwaizumi lets go, and he looks at them. The same look he had on the first night they had ever seen him, back in high school. It’s one that they’ve gotten used to over the years. Curiosity and concern. Iwaizumi wears the urge to protect them the same as he always has. “Where have you been?” he asks, voice hoarse and worn. “I’ve been trying to reach you all day.”

They toss their keys on to their countertop. “Don’t worry about it,” they dismiss, turning their back on him and opening the refrigerator, eyes scanning for an unopened bottle of alcohol. Whatever kind will work. They’re just feeling too sober.

But Iwaizumi is a step behind them, and he juts his knee into the fridge, closing the door. They turn again, arms crossed and glaring to see that he is glaring right back down at them. “What’s your problem today?” they demand, aggravated, aggressive.

“Don’t do this,” Iwaizumi pleads, trying to keep his own frustrations clear from his tone. “Not today. Just let me be here for you.”

They scoff, and roll their eyes, opening the fridge once more, swooping down to snatch up and can of beer before Iwaizumi closes it once more. “Just so you can leave again in the morning?”

It’s mean. It’s unnecessary. But they can’t help it. It comes naturally to them, to throw it back in his face in a moment like this. They don’t know why they do it. They don’t get any sense of satisfaction when the words hit his face, when they make it drop. It just twists their gut in this awful sort of way.

The can of beer opens with a hiss, and they take a hefty gulp. Iwaizumi watches, and balls his hands into fists by his side. “Drinking’s only going to make it worse,” he warns, voice thick. It only earns another scoff from them, and Iwaizumi takes a step closer to them. They take a step away, their back hitting the counter behind them.

“What are you doing here?” they ask, holding the can of beer in front of their lips, using it as a barrier between them and Iwaizumi’s words.

“No one knew where you were,” he tells them, strained. “I’ve been trying to figure out where you went and what the fuck happened all day.”

They shrug. “I went out. I dunno.”

He’s unimpressed. “Did you got to the funeral?” he asks.

The words make them flinch. It makes them uneasy to hear those words spoken aloud. “No. Did you?”

Iwaizumi frowns. He hated their mother. He’s always hated her. He wouldn’t honor her in life and he wouldn’t honor her in death. “No. Where were you all day?”

“Why’s it fucking matter?”

Iwaizumi inhales. They can see the breath rise and fall in his broad shoulders. “Cut the shit, okay? I’m sick of it,” he snaps. “You’re really starting to piss me off with this. Stop acting like people don’t care about you. Stop acting like I don’t care about you. I do care about you and it makes me fucking worried when you just disappear-“

“You disappeared,” they remind him, pointing a finger against the center of his chest. “You left me, and you weren’t worried about me then, so you don’t get to be worried now.”

He shakes his head. “I was worried. I never stopped worrying. Being away from you fucking sucked for me too,” he insists, trying to keep a control on the volume of his voice, but it wavers.

They cry when they’re angry. They can’t help it. They hate it. It makes them feel weak and emotional. But their throat gets tight and their eyes prick and they just can’t stop themself. “It sucked for you but it was hell for me! I was stuck with her and all I wanted was you and if I couldn’t have you, then I just wanted to hear your voice but you never fucking called!” they erupt, leaning in closer to him now, face hot and tears spilling.

Their voice shakes. They’ve argued, they’ve danced around the subject. They reminded Iwaizumi of how he left. But this is the first time they’ve said anything more about it, and the worst twist in their chest.

“You abandoned me,” they continue. “Once when you got on the plane and then again when you acted like I didn’t exist. I used to wait up all night for a phone call from you.”

Iwaizumi blinks. “I didn’t think you wanted to hear from me,” he admits, voice lower now. “I thought you hated me.”

They did hate him. They hated him and they loved him all at once. “I still hate you,” they say, and it’s half-true. “I hate you,” they choke out. It’s half a sob, and they slump back against the counter. “I hate you.”

Iwaizumi leans closer, placing his hands on counter on either side of them, caging them in. “I love you,” he says, plainly, like it’s a fact. And they shake their head, crossing their arms over their chest, trying to deny it. Iwaizumi lifts a hand and takes their chin between his thumb and his finger. He makes them look him in the eye. “I love you.”

And they feel so stuck. Because they want to push him away and kick him out and delete his number and never, ever give him the chance to leave them ever again. They never want to feel the way they felt when Iwaizumi disappeared from their life.

But they want so badly to be loved by him again, and to love him again. He’s offering it to them, leaning in closer to his forehead rests against theirs, and they’re not sure they have the self-discipline to deny him. “I love you,” he whispers again. “I don’t care if you hate me. I’ll always love you.”

It’s then that they can’t hold back the sobs any longer. It all just becomes too much. The drop the can of beer, still almost full, and it fizzes and spills all over the floor. Neither one of them seems to notice, as they lean forward, pressing their face into Iwaizumi’s neck as their cries rock through them. Iwaizumi is steady, like he always is, arms tight around their back, holding them up, like he always did.

And at least for now, that is enough for them.

an: omg this was kinda corny but also i kinda love it lmao. VERY DIFFERENT FROM WHAT I USUALLY POST HERE SO I AM NERVOUS !! if u made it this far pls tell me what u think <333 reblogs are appreicated!

[katszumi]

Part Two

“We won.” The words left Iwaizumi’s mouth. It was the second time he said it that week. Another win for Seijoh, leaving the other team completely defenseless. It was another easy win for them.

Another win, yet another loss in his book.

He promised himself that he’d confess to you after the game. Everyday, the words repeat in his head like a mantra. Everytime he sees you, he waits for the words to leave his mouth, but they don’t. They never do.

He hates himself for it. He wished that he could just grow up and say it. Iwaizumi knew there wasn’t much time before you both graduated, and you both knew that you’d separate after.

He wanted nothing more than to cherish this time with you.

He watched as your usual bright smile stretched across your face, eyes dancing and bleeding with pride. God, he never got tired of seeing that.

“I knew you could.” It was something he heard many times before, but he didn’t have a problem with it. No. He loved it. Loved that he had your support.

There were tons of people that supported him. He was in a powerhouse school so it wasn’t odd that there were lines of people cheering his name. Yet, he only heard you. Everytime you’d scream his name, your voice would echo in his head, telling himself to play even harder to guarantee the win that day.

He remembered you wearing his jersey once. Technically, it was ‘wear your favorite player’s jersey’ at Aoba Johsai. Mostly, it was Oikawa’s jersey that was spread throughout the school. Iwaizumi truly didn’t care that he didn’t see anyone wearing his, until he saw you.

There you were standing in the crowd alongside your two friends dressed in his jersey. He remembered how fast the heat crept up his neck, blooming across his face without warning. How rapid his heart was racing, causing him to stop in place and stare at you with a tilted head. He was shocked.

He remembered how Oikawa wrapped his shoulder around him with a crooked grin. They said nothing but from his posture Iwaizumi knew Oikawa was teasing him. Though, he didn’t care in that moment. He was too happy. Happy that you were there for him. Happy you even wore his jersey.

He remembered how Oikawa faked him into going on a date with you. Well, more of a study session. All of the third years made plans to study at the library, but it was only you and him that came. While you only saw this as ditching, Iwaizumi knew that they did this so he could confess.

He was such a blushy mess being alone and close to you. Especially when you asked for help on a specific problem, his hand lightly brushed against yours as he grabbed the pencil from you, his hand immediately recoiling back as he stuttered for words. You looked up at him and grinned muttering sorry. He didn’t know why you said it, but he nodded. That day he didn’t confess either.

He remembered finding you between two vending machines, crouched down and head into your knees. Your body was shaking as choked sobs parted your lips. Immediately, he kneeled down and asked you what was wrong but you didn’t say anything. You didn’t even look up at him. Iwaizumi was unsure of what to do since he’s never been in a situation like this before. Besides, it was you. You were headstrong, it was strange to see you break down in school.

He opened his mouth to say something, but the feeling of two arms wrapping around his stomach and a head pressing into the crook of his neck ceased him from doing so. You cried into his neck, holding him tightly like he would slip away from your grasp. He thought it was selfish to be enjoying her touch like this, but only pure bliss filled his heart.

Turns out, your grades were slipping and it wasn’t guaranteed you were going to make it into university.

He remembered the wide smile that spread across your face when you aced a test that he helped you study. You took no time to engulf him into another tight hug. Iwaizumi stiffened at your touch. Unlike last time, your arms were around his neck. Your hand placed slightly below his nape. Hesitantly but surely, he placed his fit arms on your waist. For a moment he could’ve swore that you moved in closer, but he wasn’t so sure since he was focusing on not breaking down right there and then.

He remembered the first time he went inside your home. You were down with a fever, and your parents were at work. He took the day off to aid you, hoping for a quick recovery to get back at school. Your room was nothing like he expected. It was nice, and had a sweet scent.

You were embarrassed for having him see you so sick like, but he didn’t mind. You asked him how could he not be disgusted by your looks, he responded by saying you looked exactly like he always saw you. Disgusting, is what you replied with jokingly. Iwaizumi laughed with you, his heart aching with the familiar feeling he’s experienced before. More than ever, he wanted to tell you. But he just couldn’t.

He remembered the train ride home you two took that one day, not walking since it was pouring. Iwaizumi stood, holding onto the bar to keep himself balanced while you sat. You insisted for him to sit down with you since it was still a long way to go till you both got off, but he declined. He didn’t want to invade your privacy. The seat was mildly close to yours, it was definite that he’d accidentally touch you in a matter of time. He didn’t want to go through that embarrassment, nor the apologies.

After minutes of pestering, he finally sat down beside you, his legs relishing the relief he felt from standing all day. That day he learned more and more about you: your favorite animal, favorite food, favorite place, your plans after highschool, he learned it all. From the corner of his eye he noticed your head drooping, eyelids falling. In the nick of time, he caught your head from toppling over. Unsure of what to do with it, Iwaizumi did the most selfish thing he could— He placed it onto his shoulder.

Moments after, your hand found it’s way onto his. So much for ‘invading privacy’.

Finally, he remembered the solace in his heart when he heard you reject the rumors about you and Oikawa dating. You two were growing closer, leaving Iwaizumi as a grumpy, insecure mess. The practices were more tense than they usually were, all of the 1st and 2nd years confused as to who shifted the mood. The 3rd hears already knew, and they were sure why. The rumors had been going around for about a week so it wasn’t surprising that they heard of it.

Iwaizumi didn’t want to believe it, but Oikawa was the golden boy at the school, everyone fell for him. And Iwaizumi was just him. He knew there wasn’t much of a competition, he knew that you were going to pick him, and that’s why it hurt so much. He cried almost every night, refusing to speak to anyone at school or home. He also avoided you, making sure to take the longer routes to his classes and staying ten minutes after school just so you’d miss him and walk home by yourself.

But one day, there you were, waiting for him at the gates. You demanded for him to tell you why he was avoiding you, but he wouldn’t share. You kept hassling him hoping for something to slip out, and it did. In the most snarkiest way he replied with, “Why are you bothering me? Shouldn’t you be with your boyfriend?” He pronounced boyfriend in the most mocking way, that it made you sneer. You laughed in his face, causing his heart to break even more. Iwaizumi turned around aiming to get as far away from you as he could, but you grabbed onto his hand before he could take a step. You instantly shot down his assumption, claiming that it was only a rumor, that you and Oikawa were friends and nothing more.

That day Iwaizumi felt like an idiot. He should’ve asked instead of recklessly jumping to conclusions and leaving you in the dust. It was unfair. Mentally, he cursed at himself for being so inconsiderate towards you. Only one thought entered his mind for the rest of the day: I should just confess already.

And here you are, shining your toothy smile at him, eyes ablaze with exhilaration nearly lighting the night sky itself. You were just so alluring. There was never a day where his heart stopped beating for you, where that same crimson blush stopped occuring, where he would try to find open spots in his day to spend with you. The feeling inside of him was overwhelming, the feeling coursed through his veins like it was his blood, like a drug he couldn’t live without. He wanted you. He needed you.

And like he was starved, his mouth opened before he could process anything.

“I love you.”

-

IWAIZUMI BRAINROT OH MY GOSH😫

[adoringhaikyuu]

heyyy!

i dont know if you're still taking requests but i couldn't stop thinking of angry confessions with Iwaizumi & Bokuto

ANGRY CONFESSIONS | 2

characters: bokuto + iwaizumi + kuroo + sakusa + (gn!reader)

notes: ooh it's hard thinking of bokuto being angry so it's moreso upset for him + another anon asked for kuroo and sakusa so i added them

part one / part two

★ bokuto gets all pouty and crosses his arms when he sees you. looks miserable whenever you enter the room, and obviously you pick up on it, his mood radiates wherever he is. one day you catch him alone and ask him if you've done something. he grumbles no, pouting. but you press on cause you know something's up. he reluctantly confesses, 'i just...i'm in love with you, okay? and i hated seeing you with that guy...' won't look you in the eye, but when he hears you confess that you actually feel the same way, he perks up like a puppy, mood doing a complete 180.

★ iwaizumi starts giving you attitude and barely giving you one word answers when you talk to him. tries to avoid you too but you confront him, literally walk in front of him and block him when he tries to evade you. if looks could kill, you'd absolutely be dead, but he's really glaring to mask his feelings. you pester him until he tells you what's wrong and he answers, frustrated as ever. 'it's because i have feelings for you!' he gets too embarrassed so he looks away but his eyes widen and he stops breathing when you gently grab his face and tell him you feel the same.

★ kuroo is really snarky with you all of a sudden and there seems to be more bite to his jokes. he smirks all the same, but there's something different in the way he looks at you. like he's bothered and itching to tell you something. you get sick of it and call him out when you're just with him and kenma. and kenma is really tired of hearing kuroo rant and not actually do something about it so he mutters at him to just tell you. you obviously get curious/annoyed by this and push him to tell you too. he gives you attitude, saying how he doubts you don't know. (in his eyes you've been stringing him along but that's not true) you tell him you really have no idea what's going on and that's when he breaks, scoffing. 'you're telling me you actually can't tell that i'm in love with you? yeah, right.' when he sees your reaction though, he pauses, his face dropping, now worried about the fact that he just confessed. when you tell him how you feel though, you can see the light enter his eyes again, and an actual smile on his lips.

★ sakusa is suddenly very curt with you, barely looking at you when you're around (when you can see him anyway. his eyes trail after you when you go.) he gives short responses and you can't help but feel hurt. but you can be petty too, so you start giving him the same treatment. soon, you can barely stand to be in the same room together, tensions high when you're near each other. it's silly what leads to your confessions, but the two of you run into each other in front of an elevator, you just roll your eyes and say you'll take the stairs. he mutters under his breath something about you running along to your little boyfriend and that makes you pause. you turn around, confused and offended, asking what that's supposed to mean. his eyes narrow and he asks if you think he's stupid. you respond that you don't know what's up with him but you don't have a bf. then it dawns on you and he can see the gears turning in your head and suddenly his mouth gets dry. you ask if this is why he's been acting like this and then why he cares so much. you notice the blush on his face and he knows you're not dumb enough to believe a lie but he's embarrassed so he gets defensive. 'why do you think? obviously i have feelings for you.' he looks away but he looks back at you, offended and ready to go off when you call him an idiot. he only softens when you say cause you feel the same.

[cr4yolaas]

second best (pt 2) — iwaizumi hajime

notes: at last, the heavily requested part 2 to this fic !! i really hope it met a lot of your guys’ standards — i tried my best to take as much of your requests into account ^_^ i rlly dislike m the flow of this … but hopefully u guys still enjoy LOL

tags: angst → (bittersweet?) fluff, depressive episode (reader), swearing (once), a longgg process of grief and healing and whatnot, alcoholism (only briefly), roommate! tsukishima, best friend! oikawa, tsukishima does NOT have feelings for you, not proofread and quite long

taglist (incl. everyone who asked for a pt 2 !!): @altumsomnum @gennaray @romanticandupsetting @multi-fandom-fanfic

it was tuesday.

a frigid air pierced your limbs and left you to rot away, with the windows shut tight and the door locked. there was no mistakening the dark bags hanging beneath your eyes or the flakes of skin peeling from your bottom lip, nor the soft pleas of your stomach or the iciness of your fingertips. you basked in eternal slumber and silence and darkness and whatnot, save for the ticks of a clock that was 14 minutes behind and the hum of the air conditioning.

you were not frightened in the slightest. the warning signs plastered on your flesh were no great concern, and you could not fathom the idea of having to function again. it was horribly consuming.

with a groan, you released yourself from bed, your legs trembling under the mere weight of the air. you avoided the collections of trash and clothes splayed across the floor, being careful not to disturb the peace that had formed over the past handful of weeks. the sight of the kitchen was much more refreshing.

you were locked in stasis. contrary to the comfort these walls once provided, they now served as a a form of imprisonment, designed to allow the grief and the sorrow and the anger and the guilt to coalesce and spill over. it was terribly suffocating — you wished to escape.

gently, you poured a cup of water (not that you drank more than a sip, anyways). a thought passed your mind.

you needed to leave.

sendai was a home you could not find solace in anymore. gone was the youth encapsulated in the mountaintops and the hidden pathways and the convenience stores, and no longer could you feel at ease when faced with the neighborhoods you familiarized yourself with as a child.

your new apartment was shared with an old face — one you had only seen glances of in high school, notorious for his glasses and upfront attitude. he bore no hesitance when taking you in. instead, he was grateful for your presence, as if splitting the rent with him had taken off his life’s burden off of his shoulders.

he was quick to set ground rules — laundry days were on saturdays, trash needed to be taken out on sundays, the dish washer had to be clear at the end of the day, all groceries were shared, so on and so forth. you weren’t sure if you could keep up.

it took one week for him to actually conversate.

“why did you come back here?” he questioned, with a tone that implied he knew of you for years upon years (which would be false).

you picked at the skin of your lip. “why do you ask?”

“no reason. just curious.”

in a burst of energy, you recounted the tales of your past life, one of love and youth and joy; of the old apartment, of your past hobbies, of hajime. his gaze was so distant that you weren’t sure if he was listening at all.

in return, he expressed brief apologies and turned the story to himself — he discussed his volleyball career, his teammates, how he felt somewhat disconnected from his high school friends. he did not care to mention the exhaustion riddled into the pores on your face nor the weakness of your voice. that was all you needed. a conversation, not comfort.

only an hour later did he remind you of his name — tsukishima kei — and it was only then that you realized you had moved into an apartment without taking any precautions whatsoever. he laughed when you informed him of the situation.

this was not yet a home, but it was a house. and that was sufficient.

a month had passed before tsukishima forced you to get a job. he was clearly not a fool — at some point (you couldn’t tell when), he realized you were paying off your share of the rent with your life savings, which irked him ever so slightly.

“do you plan on moving out and dying on the streets when you run out?” he complained, despite the concern laced in the fluctuations of his voice.

you began working at his former high school coach’s family store. the owner himself was welcoming — he didn’t question your circumstances nor your physical state, and merely mentioned in passing that he was “given a token of appreciation from a prized student.”

and so began the cycle. on weekday mornings, you would depart for work and tsukishima would leave for practice. occasionally, he would pack you lunch (“only because i had leftovers,” he’d say) or leave a can of coffee on the counter for you. you would work at the register until the amalgamation of students died down, and once you were left with an empty store, you would take a break and go on a walk (as requested by your boss). then, you would return in the afternoon to serve the same population of children, handing them their ice cream and their sandwiches and whatnot. when they all disappeared, the coach would let you free and dismiss you with a “good work today, let’s do it again tomorrow.”

returning home was your favorite part of the schedule. a majority of the time, tsukishima arrived later than you, leaving you to your own time until he came home with dinner and a drink.

it was a monotonous cycle, but enjoyable nonetheless.

“i’m cutting off the beer for a month,” tsukishima exclaimed one warm summer night. you left your room to see him collecting unopened bottles and discarding them in a trash bag with little regard. you could only frown.

“those are all going to waste, we haven’t even opened them,” you groaned.

there was no response from the man as he continued to clear the apartment of any alcohol, akin to a parent cleansing their child’s home. before you could protest any further, he shut the door behind him and the crashing of bottles against one another could be heard beside the building.

tsukishima re-entered the apartment with empty hands and furrowed brows. “what’s up with the shitty face?” you asked from the couch.

he clicked his tongue at your comment and bore no response, instead letting his eyes wander to the screen in front of you. the morning news was playing, as usual. and yet, it was so wrong.

the screen flashed to a familiar face, one clad with a slight grin and sweat spread over his skin. his hair had grown slightly and his complexion had darkened, evidence of his labor. but most of all, he looked happy. his eyes screamed with a passion you hadn’t seen before, and despite his haggard appearance, he seemed to be content.

you did not see tsukishima rushing to turn off the television. you did not see the screen turn black, and you did not hear the noise diminish. you did not see tsukishima’s face adjacent to yours.

“hey. let’s go outside,” he muttered before moving to pull you up and out of the house

a delicate breeze washed over you both. the sun began to kiss you goodbye, and the noon crept up in its wake, leaving both of you in the dark.

“he looked so happy,” you whispered. “i don’t know what i’m doing wrong.”

you watched tsukishima light a cigarette in your peripherals, his lighter evidently battered and marred from heavy use. he made no move to offer one to you. “you’re not doing anything wrong,” he spoke firmly, although you could tell he was struggling to formulate the right combination of words in his head. “he’s just… going along a different path.”

“it should’ve been us on the same path. i feel so stupid. he’s gone on to do such great things, and i… what am i doing?”

tsukishima didn’t push the conversation any further. you were grateful.

a week had passed before tsukishima told you he had gotten you a new job, one deeper in the city. on an early sunday morning, he presented a uniform and badge to you, your name imprinted on both. the effort made you smile.

at some point, a new cycle formed. the museum was a far cry from the run down family store, and tsukishima taught you how to welcome it with an open mind and open arms. he never did mention the exact reason for the new occupation, nor did he tell you why he was so adamant on enforcing routine in your life. nonetheless, you appreciated it.

the mundanity that your new job encapsulated was slightly more enjoyable than that of your former job. exploring the concrete rooms filled with statues and paintings and whatnot was a sufficient way to pass the time. every now and then, you’d catch your roommate detailing a specific sculpture to a curious visitor, the scene contrasting his typical behavior. not that you would ever mention it to him, though.

a new routine was not unwelcome, but it did not feel impactful anymore. you still burned blue in the night, your bones aching with reminiscence over a lost life. your hands and legs still knew tokyo; they still knew the morning commutes and the bustling cafés and the chirping crosswalks and your own home, one that had been so devastatingly haunted by grief. your heart still knew the morning calls and the evening texts and the handfuls upon handfuls of promises made on once solid territory, and yet, you knew to return to it was to betray yourself.

you missed iwaizumi hajime.

rather, you missed the life that you formulated in his presence, opposed to the shambles you had grown comfortable in now that you were back home. tsukishima had carved a clay pot for your worn soul, and yet you could not help but yearn for the comfort and stability and routine you established in a past life.

the soft padding of feet echoed outside your door. soft strings of light streamed under your door as your roommate entered the kitchen, his actions indiscernible as he maneuvered about carefully. you decided to step out to greet him.

a startled tsukishima turned around to face you. “what are you still doing up?” he interrogated, albeit not in offense. “it’s late. we have work tomorrow.”

“but i don’t want to go to work. i want to go home,” you protested. you felt childish all over again — the thirst for selfishness was one that could not escape you, even now. an overwhelming desire to be in control of your own life.

tsukishima furrowed his brows. “to tokyo?” you nodded. “okay… then let’s go to tokyo.” he paid no mind to the slanted smile that transformed your lips, instead opting to turn away and fill up his bottle. “but why?”

“i need to escape,” you sighed, as if releasing a burden that had been lingering for a moment too long. “i need change. i just- i feel so stuck. i need to live.”

he merely hummed in agreement before uttering a comment about your poor sleeping schedule and ushering you back to bed.

tokyo was a city of hopes and dreams and noise. the shift from sendai’s cicada lullabies and whispers in the wind to the incessant chatter and obnoxious roads of the city was significant — any pedestrian would notice the irritation on you and tsukishima’s faces.

the inn he picked was small, yet slightly more comfortable than your current abode. the owners were kind and your neighbors were quiet, save for the occasional drunk couple. it was a life you remembering living, but not one you yearned for any longer.

in the night, you would both visit various attractions and markets and restaurants, with tsukishima insisting on paying for your meals (“as thanks for getting a life,” he argued). for that handful of days, you bore a smile that you weren’t sure would grace your lips ever again, for there was an adolescence in the evening activities that mended the remnants of your spirit. you felt whole.

on the last day, you brought tsukishima to a ramen house nearby the inn and promised to pay for the meal. it was a tuesday, again.

for reasons you could not discover, that appeared to be one of the busiest nights for the establishment — moments after you had settled, a line began to form, and the tables were crowded with families and friend groups and dates alike.

amidst the composition of metropolitans stood a man you wished you didn’t have to see. as if it were punishment, he locked his eyes with yours, the shock in his complimenting your dread.

you watched as he excused himself from his group while ignoring the cheers and shouts about him “shooting his shot.” tsukishima observed in tandem, seemingly reading the situation from a distance despite sitting right across from you.

you noticed the bold athletic trainer embroidered onto his chest, and the fitted red shirt he wore that matched those of his team. beads of sweat compiled on his forehead — you weren’t sure if it was from the density of the room or his exhaustion or anxiety. a small part of you hoped it was the second option.

“hey,” he began. “can- can we speak outside?”

you could not help but oblige.

hajime seemed to have developed an obsession with fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. you noticed the frayed strands on a spot that aligned perfectly with his hand, and you nearly laughed.

he coughed into his fist before rambling. “i’m sorry. i know you definitely don’t want to see me, and it’s not wrong of you at all to feel that way, but i just- i’ve thought about you- no, i think about you every day up until now. i know i don’t deserve you at all, and me being here is probably super upsetting, but-“

“hajime.”

the way you called his name seemed to deteriorate him and his principles. you finally felt otherwise.

“i really, really, didn’t want to see you at all. i don’t even want the thought of you to pass my mind. i’ve built a life outside of you and i’m tired of you interrupting it.” you witnessed his heart, mind, and body freeze simultaneously.

“i- i understand that, i know, i’m sorry. i’ve been- i’ve been reflecting a lot recently and i’ve known i was horribly in the wrong and i’m ashamed to have done nothing about it, and i know this sounds really, really dumb but i wish i had just stayed with you for that extra day because- because i don’t think i can go any longer without you now that i have you here, in front of me. could we- can we at least… keep in touch?” he seemed to speak without limitations, akin to a leaking clay pot. he was distressed, evidently. but you no longer saw his face and thought of guilt and love and yearning; you held no space for him.

you shook your head gently. “hajime, i don’t want you in my life anymore. you achieved your dreams, and i’m working on finding mine. that’s how it was meant to be.”

if not for the small lamp above the two of you, you would not have noticed the tears spilling onto his face. you bore no sympathy — with a goodbye and a small wave, you left him in the alley with a heavy heart and saline tears.

to witness him before you had awakened the truth riddled in your sinew and bloodstream: iwaizumi hajime was no longer a necessity. a truth that had cowered away beneath guilt and fragility and shame had uncovered itself, and for once, you breathed a full breath.

oikawa seemed so vibrant on the other side of your screen, the argentinian sun kissing his skin almost perfectly. “…i miss you lots!! i’ll visit soon, maybe, and we can catch up and maybe go get coffee and then debrief and then…” he trailed off with an aloof grin, his words spilling out from your phone and reverberating around the living room. tsukishima stood in the kitchen, the sound of his deliberate chopping and washing contesting oikawa’s voice. “but anyways, i’ll see you soon! byebye!!”

you waved goodbye and hung up, leaving only the noise of your roommate’s cooking. a loud groan left his lips in the midst of his mixing, followed by a complaint about how irritable your friend’s voice was. you could only laugh.

gentle strings of moonlight spilled into the apartment through the kitchen window, the songs of the evening falling upon both of you and your shared comfort. tomorrow was your off day, granting you both an opportunity for an actual meal. tsukishima (begrudgingly) agreed to make your favorite dish, with the request that you’d make his favorite dessert next week.

“thank you for the meal,” you whispered. tonight would consist of good food and a relaxing night, and tomorrow would entail a day of rest and a weekly reset, along with another call with oikawa. with marred hands and a porcelain heart, you had managed at last to craft a solid life — steady health, steady friends, and a steady routine.

you would no longer be second best to anything, and that was sufficient enough.

[malteeze]

[ BABY, CAN I TAKE IT BACK? ] - IWAIZUMI HAJIME

genre: angst/ comfort at the end

description: in an unexpected situation, iwaizumi betrays your trust in a nearly irreparable way

for as long as iwaizumi had been your boyfriend, he was always consistent in expressing how utterly enamored he was by you. from the moment you graciously leaped into his life, he could not imagine a world where he couldn’t constantly admire your every gesture. iwaizumi rarely found himself angry with you; anytime he did express his anger, it could hardly be described as such. the most anger he ever allowed himself to bestow onto you was a slightly elevated voice, or a tiny hint of irritation in his tone. even those trivial actions pierced him with guilt and regret, which led to a plethora of unnecessary apologies and promises to make it up to you. you never felt entitled to these sorts of actions from iwaizumi (especially for such forgettable disputes), but no matter how much you explained to him that it wasn’t a big deal, he would not be able to live with himself if he didn’t apologize to his beloved girlfriend. you were indescribably precious to him, and he truly wanted to treat you as the gem he saw you to be. 

you sat closely beside him on the couch, enjoying the rare moment of idle time together. you were both quite busy people, constantly being pulled in new directions and constantly facing new tasks. you sometimes visited iwaizumi at the gym during his work hours when time permitted you to. although you both enjoy the times when you run errands or complete household duties together, nothing could replace the moments of shared tranquility. your legs were comfortably draped over his muscular thighs, and your arms held gently onto his bicep as your head rested upon his shoulder. iwaizumi sat with his phone in his right hand, as he softly caressed your legs with his left. 

your eyes stray from the television to his phone, taking slight notice of your name being mentioned in the messages between him and oikawa. you look up at your boyfriend’s face as he types, and you take notice of the slight chuckle he lets out at oikawa’s responses. as curiosity strikes you, your eyes wander back towards his phone screen, and you begin to read the content of each message. 

the more you read, the faster your heart beats. you realize that iwaizumi and his best friend were discussing their relationships with each other, which you normally thought nothing of. however, the information that iwaizumi decided to share about you was the shocking part. he casually shared your insecurities and other personal information with oikawa (some of the info being sexual), which caused a pit to form in your stomach. you never questioned your trust in iwazumi, but now you were astounded by how carelessly he babbled about the things you gradually mustered the courage to share with him. 

was this even his first time doing this, considering his natural demeanor? does he genuinely think this is something you would be comfortable with?  

in a fit of humiliation and hurt, you frown and let go of your boyfriend’s arm. “iwaizumi,” you start, slicing through the comfortable silence in the room, “why the fuck would you tell oikawa things like that?” you ask with a loud voice, your face growing hot from your sudden display of irritation. he locks his phone and turns his head towards you, a bewildered look contorting his features. he almost seems confused as to why you would be upset at such a thing, which angers you even more. “what’s the problem? he’s my best friend, we talk like this all the time,” he states defensively. he definitely thinks you’re comfortable with it, but you’re mortified. you exhale loudly as you look away from him before returning your gaze to his. “that’s not the point, iwaizumi. i don’t care if you guys know everything about each other, it’s still not your place to casually share personal information about me.” the tenacity in your tone grew as annoyance violently coursed through your body. removing your legs from his lap, you shook your head and faced away from him. iwaizumi felt his patience growing thin with the way you spoke to him, and with your harsh attitude towards him. he straightened his posture and looked directly at you as he spoke, despite your stubborn decision to glare at the wall. “why does it bother you so much, (y/n)? it’s not like oikawa would tell anyone else!” he shouts, growing frustrated with your exaggeration of the situation, “my fucking god, stop overreacting. you always have to fucking act like this and ruin perfectly good moments” he leans forward to rest his elbows on his knees, and rubs his hand over his face in exasperation, failing to notice your shocked expression at his words. you’re not particularly used to iwaizumi growing this angry with you. you cannot conceal how stunned you are at his brash confession that he thinks you’re overreacting. he knows how difficult it is for you to divulge your feelings, because he knows how afraid you are of being shrugged off or taken lightly. in spite of his familiarity with your doubts, he proudly unveiled his lack of respect for your boundaries. why can’t he just admit that he crossed a line? if he didn’t actually care, why would he ever deceive you with enchanting words? 

you quickly get up from the couch and move to stand in front of him. he looks up at you with his hands clasped together in front of his face, irritation building up behind his eyes. “are you fucking serious?” you utter passionately. “i’m overreacting because i’m mad at my boyfriend for betraying my trust? i’m not comfortable with other people knowing those things iwaizumi! how is that so fucking hard to understand?” iwaizumi swiftly stands up with aggression, now towering over you as he attempted to suppress his anger. “watch yourself, (y/n). i’m getting real fucking tired of you talking to me like that,” he snapped, the anger seeping through his hushed tone. despite his words, you continued to make your point fervently. you couldn’t believe that he was being so dismissive when you only wished to explain why you felt so hurt. “really?” you looked up at him, stunned. as you begin speaking again, the volume in your voice elevates. “you don’t even understand why i’m upset! i trusted you enough to tell you everything about me, and you completely ignored my boundaries!  if i wanted oikawa to know, then i would’ve told him. and i don’t give a fuck if he won’t tell anyone, it’s fucked up to just share those things behind my back!” you stare at him, your chest heaving. as your peel your gaze from his and begin to walk away, you mutter, “fucking asshole.”

the moment you tossed the insult at iwaizumi, the air surrounding you seemed to grow tense. any background noise filling the room dwindled into a suffocating silence. immediately after the words left your mouth, iwaizumi forcefully grabbed the top of your arm and whipped you around to face him. “what did you just call me?” his face was contorted into a ferocious expression, and the height of his tone startled you. “let go of me iwaizumi,” you said in an effort to be stern, but your fear and desperation creeped through. when you attempted to shake your arm from his brutal grasp, he simply tightened his hold on you. with your panic growing rapidly, you quickly look up at iwaizumi, distress painted across your expression. he had never treated you like this before, and his sheer rage frightened you. “you’re so goddamn annoying, (y/n)!” he was shouting so loudly that his voice echoed throughout your shared home. “be upset if you want, cause i don’t give a damn. you always blow shit out of proportion and i’m so fucking sick of apologizing to you and acting like i did something wrong just to make you fucking happy.” 

as the last syllable escaped from his mouth, he roughly released your arm, and briskly trudged past your unmoving figure. moments before he reached the staircase, his hand made sudden contact with the wall in a loud slam. the unexpected sound racked your body and caused you to flinch. as he travels up the stairs, his mutters of “fucking bitch” and “so fucking annoying” reach your ears. the house shakes slightly after he forcefully slams the door. you remain in the same position, your mind enveloped in a misty daze. once you finally move to cautiously sit on the couch, tears begin to slide mockingly down your face. 

you couldn’t seem to make any sense of the events that just unfolded. your ever-so-doting boyfriend who never ceased in his proclamations of adoration towards you just sliced through every bit of trust you had for him.

“i’m so fucking sick of apologizing to you and acting like i did something wrong just to make you fucking happy!”

with such bold conviction, he admitted to you that every bit of remorse and gentleness he ever expressed to you after an argument was a mere facade. his devotion to you, and his patience when it came to understanding each of your emotions was ingenuine. you poured every bit of yourself into the relationship, and you left no part of yourself uncovered with iwaizumi. he knew absolutely everything. he knew how you would instinctively draw back from him and hide your emotions if he made a mockery of your concerns. he knew your trust in him would be shattered to useless remains. that’s why he always took great care to assure you that anything you brought up to him was precious. he didn’t want you to hide any part of yourself from him, and he wanted you to trust him entirely. he loved everything about you. after three years of being with iwaizumi, you wouldn’t have ever questioned your ability to trust him. now, you almost regret revealing the deepest parts of your mind to him. he understands you more than anyone else, but he still mercilessly betrayed you. it took him so much time to earn enough of your trust to be allowed past your barriers of apprehension, yet he still dismissed your feelings in the face of his efforts. now, your eagerness to confide in iwaizumi is blocked by doubt, and you face the harsh reality that his tenderness and warmth is forced. he lured you towards him with his endearing presence, just to snatch any bit of alleviation away from you. 

the television show you were watching earlier continues to play quietly. you stand up and walk into the bathroom, gathering water in your hands to quell the redness in your face. after patting your face dry, you recovered from your previous trance, and hunger rushed to your stomach avidly. you search the fridge and begin preparing your food at the stove, and you hear familiar footsteps descending down the stairs. iwaizumi stands cautiously outside the kitchen, and offers a remorseful “hey, baby,” watching as you plate the meal you made. you don’t even bother to look at him as you mutter a dull “what do you need?” 

as you stand in front of the counter, iwaizumi takes the opportunity to walk up behind you and wrap his arms around your waist. allowing the feeling of regret to consume him, he rests his head on your shoulder, and exhales loudly. you close your eyes, and lightly grasp onto iwaizumi’s forearms, peeling them from your waist. “tell me what it is that you need, then please go away from me,” placing your hands back onto the counter, you turn your head to gaze up at iwaizumi behind you. he studies your vacant expression, not failing to notice the redness in your eyes and the slight swell in your face. hoping to find the usual love and fondness in your eyes, he sees no sign of either. instead he’s met with a stony gaze of resentment. as much as iwaizumi’s pitiful expression pains you, and as much as you want to let him pull you into a hug, you cannot forgive him so easily. the impact of his actions weighed heavier on you, anyway. 

you turn back around as you begin to feel the slight burn of tears in your eyes, but you blink them away just as quickly as they arose. iwaizumi closed his eyes and swallowed harshly, preparing himself to finally speak to you. “(y/n).. you don’t have any idea how sorry i am,” he begins, slightly uneasy. “you’re the most precious thing in the world to me, and there isn’t anything that matters more to me than making sure you’re always at ease around me.” you turn your body to face him, and the genuine worry and agony in his expression makes your stomach drop. “if you want me to be ‘at ease’ around you iwaizumi, then why did you tell me that you only pretend to care? why did you call me all those horrible things and tell me that i overreact too much?” you ask with a wavering voice, looking into his eyes. “i was stupid!” he pleads, the panic in his expression blooming further, “baby, i was so so stupid and selfish, i didn’t mean a single bit of it and i would sacrifice anything in this world to change it. please don’t ever shut me out,” he places his hands on the counter beside you, “i don’t know what i would do if i couldn’t have every bit of you, please don’t ever hide yourself from me. even if you think i don’t, i always care about every detail. you don’t ever need to doubt that.” his eyes were set ablaze with urgency and an aching desire for your forgiveness. you knew he was truly sorry, but the ability to fully trust him again wouldn’t come so quickly after the damage he inflicted. still, you knew you could at least forgive him. “iwa, you know it won’t be easy for me to trust you again after all the things you said..” you tell him honestly, sorrow in your expression. “please tell me what i can do to gain your trust back, my lovely baby,” he places his hands on either side of your face, his thumbs rubbing your face gently. “i should have never taken it so lightly, and i hate to see you so restrained..  i want to make it up to you.” 

you feel a sense of warmth spread through your chest, and you lean back a bit to face him. “all i want is to know that you’re sincere. i don’t want to be hesitant to open up to you.. please just promise me that you’ll be understanding when i mention things like this to you,” he nods, eager to soothe you by any means. “if you do something like this again, it’ll be even harder for me to trust you.” his hands glide down your arms and gently take your hands, “i promise that nothing like this will happen again.. i wanna know about anything that bothers you even a little, my pretty baby,” he wraps his arms around you in a fervent hug, and exhales in relief at your forgiveness. his heart calms even further when you wrap your arms around him in return. he pulls back to admire your beautiful expression, and leans down to place a wispy kiss on your lips as his fingers faintly travel across your waist. “i love you, (y/n),” he says sincerely, basking in the way your eyes swell with fondness for him.  “i love you too, iwa,” you smile at him, and his own expression brightens significantly at such an enrapturing sight.

[zmbiesuga]

I'M NOT A VIOLENT DOG, I DON'T KNOW WHY I BITE.

pairing: i. hajime x gn!reader

includes: hurt/no comfort, iwa gets into a fight, blood mention, cursing, iwa and reader are friends, reader refuses to be with iwaizumi due to emotional constipation, pre-timeskip, w.c 3.0k

notes: "always an angel never a god", "i don't know why i am the way i am ; not strong enough to be your man", "i can't love you how you want me too", yeah. i'm having a fucking field day.

soundtrack: not strong enough, bite the hand

It's nearly midnight when you hear the soft raps against your front door. You cautiously open it to find a disheveled Hajime, bruised and battered with red blood trickling down his nose.

"...The other guy looks worse..." he mumbles, sheepishly scratching the back of his neck, "...I didn't know where else to go, (y/n) I'm sorry. I had a fight with my dad and Oikawa is asleep for once — "

"Haji, just..." you say, holding up your hand with a sigh, moving to the side, "...just get inside, it's cold."

He's the last face you wanna see and the last person you want to offer a semblance of comfort for right now, but even though you haven't talked in weeks, he's still your friend.

"What was it this time?" you whisper, leading him in the bathroom. He sits on the edge of the tub and watches you rummage through the cabinet to find a first aid kit.

He can't help the way his eyes trail over your body, he wants to hold you. That was his first thought, he wants to hold you, feel you pressed against him while he sobs and apologizes for every little thing he's ever done wrong by you.

But he won't.

"Some guy, said somethin' stupid to me," he mumbled, looking down at his lap where his fists lay clenched in anger, "I don't...it's not right, I know, I know it isn't (y/n). I can't help it, I get so worked up over everything and then..."

He stops mid-sentence, breathing hitching as he raises his head to look at you. His gaze is pleading, begging you to understand a part of him that he won't even show you.

You offer him a sympathetic look for a split second before your eyebrows furrow, pressing the tissue against his nose and tilting his head up higher with your other hand on his chin.

"You can help it, Haji," you muttered, pulling back to look at him, your gaze almost pitying and it makes him sick to his stomach, "I know you can. You know what your problem is? You never know what you're feeling because all your emotions stack on top of each other like a jenga tower waiting to fall."

His own brows knit together, his own expression slowly turning to frustration, "You don't know shit about how I feel," he growls, "you don't know anything."

"You're right, I don't," you quip back, hand gripping his chin tighter, "how should I? You want me to love you, but you won't show every part of yourself. You're scared and you don't trust me enough to love you past all of it."

His gaze softens once more, pulling your hand away with a gentle tug and looking down at the bathroom floor in shame.

"I know you're scared, Haji," you whispered again, voice cracking with emotion as your eyes glazed over with tears, "I can't expect you not to be, but...you don't trust me. I get it, okay? It's hard to open up right away and that's not what I expect. I just want you to find a way to sort through it yourself."

How could he open up? Hajime Iwaizumi, the hothead, Oikawa Tooru's best friend. A side character to everything who's only there for the development of the main guy. It doesn't matter how he feels, it's a burden. It's who he is, what defines him. He loses that and he loses everything...except you, but he's not sure how much he wants to trade in his reputation for you yet.

And here you are, waiting for a man who doesn't know if he wants to change. Waiting for someone who you know is so much more than anger, than the side character. Waiting and waiting for when he sees that himself, but to no avail.

When he slowly lifts his head up to meet your gaze, you expect an apology. You expect a change in heart from him, a promise to figure out how to sort through it all. You can see his own eyes are watery, ironic the way he wouldn't let you see him cry. You expect everything except what he actually confesses.

"I'm moving to California."

[rishiguro]

JOB‘S COMFORTER - I. HAJIME

warnings: iwaizumi-centered. feelings of guilt. he needs a hug ngl. hurt/no comfort. roughly 1.2k so rather short.

a/n: @shoyostar this one‘s for you

iwaizumi has never been the best at comforting people.

but today he wished he was.

he immediately knew that something was up when he entered your flat— quiet and dark, missing your usual chatter, the music coming from the kitchen as you baked or cooked something.

putting away his shoes, he frowned as he entered, tiptoeing his way through the hallway and peeking into every room he passed — finding it abandoned, dark and quiet, before moving on to the next one. this went on, his concern growing with every second until he stood in front of the door to your bedroom.

his heart clenched as he reached for the handle, stopping when he heard your muffled whimpers. he could practically see you lying on the bed, a comforter messily thrown over you with your head buried in the pillow, hoping to stifle your cries.

possibly even waiting for him to come in, wishing for him to take a seat on the mattress right next to you, rubbing your back for a minute or two to help calm your sobs before pulling you up and putting your head on his chest and tightly wrapping his arms around you. he should mumble some words of affirmation and comfort, reminding you of just how much he loved you and how much he cherished you.

but he stood frozen in front of the door with a clenched jaw, his hand reaching for the door handle only to float in the air just a few centimeters in front of it.

iwaizumi realized quite early in life his strengths in athletics resulted in him lacking in the delicate handling of emotions. instead of caring and soft, iwaizumi was brash and outright clumsy when it came to matters of the heart, feeling like a bull in a china shop.

breaking things no matter what he did or how he did them — and no matter if he wanted to or not.

it didn’t even matter just who he was trying to comfort: his best friend, his friends, lover or family.

he always stumbled over his words, laughing awkwardly when he tried to crack a joke to get them to laugh. sometimes when he tried to offer some positive words or share the burden, he only seemed to make it worse, noticing how the person‘s shoulders dropped further down, the frown deepened on their face or the tears got a little bit bigger. and every time they did his heart sunk a little bit deeper, guilt weighing heavily on his mind for days after. and when he didn’t speak, the long silence was just as uncomfortable, almost painful for everybody involved.

so he learned rather quick to just retreat, let the person be for a while, either to calm down on their own or being comforted by someone else.

someone who was better at it than him.

he swallowed thickly, listening to your pained sobs, imagining your teary and patchy face, hiding away from the world, your shoulders shaking violently.

he should be there for you just like he promised and yet he stood outside, frozen, forced to listen to his lover‘s cries.

to your cries.

clenching his hand, he pressed his fingernails deep into his palm, scoffing at his pathetic self. he was supposed to be your support, your rock, the one to keep you from drowning. yet here he stood, witnessing your anguish first hand, so close to you like never before and he still refused to extend a hand out to you, pulling you out, keeping you safe.

how could he even call himself your boyfriend when in your moments of distress, when you needed nothing but comfort, he stood right outside, doing absolutely nothing to ease your mind and be there for you.

he was nothing but a pathetic excuse of a lover.

but even if he could get himself to move, to open the door and get to you, would that be of any worth if all he did was make it worse? when he couldn‘t get you to stop crying but only make your heart even more, punching you down instead of helping you up?

never in his life did iwaizumi manage to genuinely comfort someone. he was not only unable to let himself be vulnerable, but also allow others to feel this way with him, too clumsy around feelings and too brash as soon as he tried to be calm and comforting for once. so why would it be any different now?

so instead, he clenched his jaw, stepping away slowly with silent steps.

surely you would be better off without him right now. he would probably only make it worse by saying something wrong or not saying enough, when all he wanted was to help you feel better.

his feet dragged him into the dark living room, slowly moving towards the couch. turning on the small light on the side table, he sat down, staring blankly at the wall. and even though it was quiet, it seemed like he could still hear your sobs echoing through his head, making his heart ache and his fingers itch to reach out to you.

but he couldn‘t.

he didn‘t notice how the minutes have passed and he didn‘t hear how the bedroom door creaked open, your slurring steps slowly inching towards the living room.

you rubbed over your cheeks, hands fisting the sleeves of the sweatshirt on your torso, stopping in your tracks as soon as you saw the pair of white trainers sitting neatly in front of your door and a jean jacket hanging on your rack.

slowly you inched towards the living room, where you found an almost catatonic iwaizumi sitting on the couch.

“oh, hi. home already?“

your unsteady voice ripped him right out of his trance, his head shooting in your direction. looking up, he glanced right into your still teary eyes, noticing how you had hastily wiped your cheeks with the sweatshirt you were currently wearing — his sweatshirt.

he could tell that you tried to keep your composure, not knowing if he had heard you earlier and for how long he has been here, trying to appear as normal as possible. noticing your efforts only made his heart sink deeper.

he didn‘t know if it was because you didn‘t want him to see you hurt or because you knew he wouldn‘t be able to comfort you, instead leaving you to your own merits — like he already did, even if you didn‘t know.

his dry lips opened and closed for a few times, trying to say something to you, offering you some form of comfort or reassurance, but no word came out. he wanted to tell you so many things, offer you alive or just a few sweet words of affirmation or even no words at all, instead only pulling you in for a long hug. but he didn’t. instead he could only helplessly stare up at you, forcing his lips into a small smile and nod softly.

iwaizumi has never been the best at comforting people.

but today he wished he was.

reblogs are appreciated !

[hqbaby]

breakup vacation — iwaizumi x reader

⋆｡°⋆✩ acting like our hearts won’t be breaking you and your boyfriend decide to spend the night together. one last time.

word count. 2.4k content. [18+] angst, explicit sexual content (oral sex f!receiving, fingering, unprotected vaginal penetration, soft sad sex), cigarette use

“Here’s to us,” you say, taking your glass of champagne and raising it in toast.

Iwaizumi cracks a gentle smile and follows suit, raising his glass and clinking it against yours. “To us,” he says, “and the beginning of the end.”

You chuckle and take a sip of your drink. “The beginning of the end.”

The two of you sit in the middle of the restaurant, chatting away quietly and blending in with the rest of the couples in the room, like nothing is wrong. 

You’re both dressed up, you in a dainty white dress and him in a crisp suit. On the outside, you look like you’re celebrating an anniversary (maybe even heading towards a proposal, if you’re lucky). On the outside, you look like the perfect couple, the kind that will last years, the kind that will weather all possible storms. On the outside, you look like everything between the two of you will work out, like everything will be just fine.

On the outside, it doesn’t look like the two of you are breaking up.

No one would believe you if you told them. You don’t even know if you’d believe yourself.

Over dinner, the two of you skip the loaded conversations. You pretend that Iwaizumi’s plane isn’t coming to take him in the morning, whisk him away to some place you’ve never even been. You pretend that your apartment—the one that you shared for four long years—isn’t sitting in the middle of the city, empty and waiting for the next perfect couple to fill its walls with love and warmth. You pretend that you aren’t visiting your parents next weekend, aren’t going to have to tell them that the boy they refer to as their “son-in-law” might be someone they never see again.

You dance around your problems. You hint at them occasionally, the things better left unsaid. You tease one another, joke around, but you never go deeper, never ask the bigger questions. You’ve done enough of that for the last three months.

When you’re through with dinner, the two of you head back to your hotel room and Iwaizumi has his lips on yours before the door is even closed.

“Haji,” you murmur against him, pressing yourself into his touch as his hands roam your body, the body he knows so well.

His fingers glide over the surface of your skin, ghost over the fabric of your dress. “I want this to be perfect,” he tells you when he pulls away, his forehead pressed against yours. His hand goes to the zipper of your dress. “Can I?”

You can’t help but laugh. After all this time, he’s the same boy you met in college all those years ago, the one who was always so careful around you, always thought you were too good for him, always tried to be what you deserved.

“Of course,” you tell him, giving him a quick peck before trailing your lips down his neck. You suck at the junction right before his collarbone as he drags your zipper down. You can hear his breathing grow heavy in anticipation.

Iwaizumi slides the straps of your dress down and places featherlight kisses across your shoulders. “You’re so fucking beautiful.”

You run a hand through his hair and guide him to look at you. “You’re not too bad yourself,” you say, smiling. You stare into his eyes for a moment, getting lost in the green of them, ignoring the terrible thought in the back of your head that tells you that you’re never going to look at his eyes this way ever again.

He kisses you again before you can let your thoughts swallow you whole. 

His hands work to slide your dress off you, leaving you in nothing but lingerie. You remember when you picked out this particular set, when you dragged your entirely embarrassed boyfriend into a lingerie store at the mall and insisted he choose what he liked.

“I think you look great in anything,” he told you, keeping his eyes down as two women passed by, comparing the bras that they had selected. “I don’t really have much of an opinion on this.”

You held out the set you were looking at. “What about this one?”

He dared to look, gulping when his eyes landed on the black fabric, all intricately embroidered with tiny roses. The image of you wearing it flashed through his head and he stared back at the ground.

“I think we should go home.”

A laugh. “Are you hard right now?”

“Don’t say that out loud!”

Iwaizumi leads you to the bed, laying you down and crawling until he’s right between your legs. He glances up at you, corners of his lips quirking upwards before he slides your panties down and kisses your thighs.

You pant as his lips get closer and closer to where you want him, until he places a kiss on your clit and you let out a moan.

“Gonna make this perfect,” he tells you before diving in, his tongue coming out to slide between your folds.

“H-Haji,” you whimper, moaning as he alternates between sucking your clit and licking your cunt. He’s done this a million times before, but you can never seem to get enough of it. He could do this forever and you wouldn’t mind.

But you won’t have forever to spend with him.

You savor every second of this, every time he drags his tongue through your slick pussy, every time he prods and presses against your clit, every time he stops to place a kiss on your inner thigh. You try to remember the way he makes every part of you tingle, the way he brings you closer and closer to your high.

He slides a finger into you and you arch your back and grab his hair.

“Fuck!” You moan. “Right there, Haji, right there.”

“Here?” he says against your weeping cunt and he curls his finger, making you see stars at his touch.

The coil in your stomach grows impossibly tight and your grip on his hair grows stronger. He groans against you as he licks and sucks at your pussy, drawing you closer and closer to the edge.

You let out a sinful moan. “I’m coming, Haji!” you scream as you feel yourself come undone on his tongue.

He continues to lap at your cunt as you ride out your high, legs shaking as the pleasure overwhelms you. “So sweet,” he says. “So perfect.”

When you come down from your high, you sit up and pull his face towards yours, kissing him deeply. His tongue slides into your mouth and you moan when you taste yourself on him.

Hastily, you start to unbuckle his pants, pushing his belt aside and unzipping his fly. “Need you inside me,” you tell him, the ache in your core growing again.

He chuckles and helps you pull his pants down. “Always so impatient,” he says, pumping his length in his hands. He lays you back down and presses a kiss to your cheek, teasing your entrance with his tip. “You ready, sweet thing?”

You nod, hands already coming to grip the sheets. No matter how many times you’ve done this, you always know to brace yourself.

Iwaizumi slides his length into you, filling you up in a way that’s so familiar, so normal and yet always so intense. He bottoms out and you feel his tip press against your cervix.

You throw your head back and let out a moan, hands coming to grab his back.

He starts to move, slow but deep and hard. You can feel his length glide through your walls, your slick coating him and forming a white ring at the base of his cock. You dig your nails into his skin and you hear him groan as he starts to move impossibly deeper.

“So fucking good.” He hisses as you clench around him. He presses his forehead against yours and you find yourself staring straight at him, his eyes boring into yours. “I love you.”

The words hit you like acid.

What if no one ever loves you again?

You feel a tear slip from your eye and you smile up at him. “I love you too,” you tell him. He hits a particularly delicious spot inside you and your hand flies to the nape of his neck, pulling him as close to you as possible. “I love you so much.”

You watch as his eyes start to well up too, tears sliding from his cheek to yours. “I love you,��� he says, his thrusts becoming erratic. He’s pounding into you now, his hands coming to hold your face as he drives into your sore cunt. “I love you so fucking much.”

You can feel another orgasm building and you hold onto Iwaizumi for dear life. “I love you.”

Your orgasm washes over you and you can’t help but scream as your boyfriend chases his high, thrusting into you at a mind numbing pace.

“Fucking love you,” he groans, getting closer, “Gonna come!”

You moan as you feel the warmth of his cum fill you, the squelching sound between your legs loud and clear as Iwaizumi fucks you through his high.

After a moment, he collapses on top of you and holds your head to his chest. The two of you lie in silence as you cry, holding each other close.

It hits you that this is the last night you’ll ever spend together. When Iwaizumi leaves in the morning, there will be nothing left of the two of you. Nothing else to return to.

You mourn the life you could have lived. You cry for the people you will never be. You give yourselves this moment to grieve.

What else is there to do?

“What was your favorite part?”

You're both out on the balcony, passing a cigarette between the two of you. You’re both trying to stretch this moment out, make it last as long as possible. But the world continues to move beneath you. The lights from the city continue to flash. Life goes on, no matter how much you wish it would stop for just a moment.

“My favorite part?” you ask him, raising a brow. A harsh gust of wind hits you and you fight the urge to shiver. “Favorite part of what?”

Iwaizumi takes off his jacket and drapes it over your shoulders. “Of us.”

You hum thoughtfully, pulling the piece of clothing around you. “Coming home to you was always nice,” you tell him. “I remember calling my mom the first time I came home after we moved in together.” A smile finds its way to your lips. “I was so excited, so giddy. And I never stopped feeling that way. The thought of coming home to you always made me sick to my stomach in the best way possible.”

You catch him staring at you with that same awestruck look you’ve grown accustomed to. You think about how lucky you must be to have found someone who can make you feel like being loved so terribly, so immensely is normal. You’ve never wanted more from Iwaizumi, he always gave you more than you needed.

“What about you?” you ask, taking a drag of the cigarette. “What was your favorite part?”

You watch his face contort in deep thought, as if he’s scouring the recesses of his mind to find the moment, the point in time when he thought that what you two had was everything he wanted and more.

His face lights up. “When you asked for my pen.”

“What?” A laugh sputters out of you. “When was that?”

He shrugs, a little shy now. But he could never really be shy around you. “When we were in school,” he tells you. “And I went through that phase when I never had a pen on me. So I kept asking for yours.”

“We hardly knew each other back then.”

“Yeah, but it was still my favorite part.”

You bite the insides of your cheek to keep your smile from growing too wide. “You’re ridiculous.”

“I know,” he tells you, grinning that boyish grin of his. “But you love it.”

You nod. “I do,” you say, your smile starting to crack as you feel the tears spring from your eyes again. “I really do.”

He leans over to cup your cheeks. “Hey, hey,” he murmurs. “Don’t cry. We’ve done enough crying.”

“I know,” you choke out, trying to keep your tears at bay. “It’s just…”

“I know.”

You move your hand to cup his. “I don’t think I’ll ever love someone as much as I love you,” you admit. “And I'm not even scared of never loving again… I’m scared of knowing that I won’t ever have you again.”

Iwaizumi kisses your forehead and lets his lips linger on your skin. “You don’t know that,” he tells you. “We might find each other again.”

Part of you wants to believe him, but part of you knows that—even if you do, by some miracle, find each other again—things will never be the same. You will never be the people that you are in this moment, the two people who love each other to the point of ache, the point of no return.

There’s no going back to this moment. There’s no chance that you’ll find your way back here again.

But he inches away from your forehead and stares at you with those eyes of his, silently pleading for you to disagree with the facts, to deny the truth. What’s the point of the truth now anyway?

“We might find each other again,” you say. “And we’ll be okay.”

Iwaizumi nods. “We’ll be okay.”

The bed is cold when you wake up. You stare at the empty space beside you for the longest time, blinking in the cold morning light, hardly believing that any of this is real, wondering how you’re even supposed to go on after this. 

You don’t know how, but you manage to find the strength to sit up. Face the music.

You look around the empty hotel room. You note the space where Iwaizumi’s bags were just last night, note how they’re not there anymore. You try not to cry again. 

How could someone go from being the love of your life to an absence you will forever try to fill?

You reach for your phone to check the time. You wish you hadn’t.

hajime: i love you. i always will.

notes. smut and angst 😌 my favorite combo 😌 i'm so happy to be back 😌

[scarfwrites]

Fake Dating

❅Genre : Fluff  / Crack , Angst

❅Pairings: Iwaizumi x Reader 

                     Tsukishima x Reader

                     Kuroo x Reader 

❅Warnings: Angst, mentions of cheating but not the reader, vulgar language, a lotta crack cuz it's the seijoh 4, sexual because tumblr said so

❅Word Count: 10,395

❅A/N: OKAY THE IWAIZUMI ONE MIGHT BE VERY SELF INDULGENT BUT I CAN’T HELP IT I LOVE HIM

I also cried writing his 

Iwaizumi

“Make sure you don’t miss that spike! Y/N-chan’s watching~~” Oikawa teased as Iwaizumi looked over to you almost missing his spike making the third years laugh

“YOU ALMOST MISSED!” Makki teasingly yelled from across the court

“Aww, Iwa-chan I didn’t know you wanted to impress Y/N-chan that badly!” Oikawa laughed loudly but soon stopped once a very angry Iwaizumi glaring at him

“I swear I’ll fucking kill you if you do that again” Iwaizumi threatened making the setter gulp

“Luckily Iwaizumi won’t do that in front of Y/N” Kindaichi whispered to the other lower years

“Alright Let’s all take a water break!” Matsun yelled holding a bunch of water bottles

The whole team expected you to greet them with your usual lunches that you’d prepare for all of them. But instead, they were greeted with a very bummed-looking Y/N watching their phone.

“Looks like they didn’t see what happened earlier, lucky you” Makki teased as Iwaizumi looked at him with annoyance

“Yahoo Y/N-chan! I hope you have your lunches you pack they’re delicious!” Oikawa exclaimed happily getting zero response from you

“They look really distracted  with their phone” Yahaba pointed out as he drank from his water bottle

“Hello? Earth to Y/N!” Oikawa yelled waving a hand in front of your face

“Huh? Oh are you all done?” you asked as everyone gave you weird looks

“We’re having a water break” Matsun said sitting down

“Yeah and where are those lunches you usually pack” Oikawa asked as you looked through your bag

“Here they are” you spoke sadly as you gave Oikawa your packed lunch making everyone concerned

“Thanks! I was starving!” Oikawa said in relief as Iwaizumi smacked the back of his head

“Nevermind that,  is something wrong?” Iwaizumi asked sitting next to you

“Yeah where's that happy-go-lucky Y/N we all love” Makki said as he wrapped his arms around your shoulders

“Sorry, It’s just I’ve got a family gathering in a few days” you folded your arms laying your head on them

“That doesn’t sound that bad” Watari said confused

“No no you don’t get it” you sighed “Every year we have a big family gathering and I always get asked if I have a boyfriend/girlfriend or whatever” you continued

“Well, do you?” Oikawa asked curiously as he ate 

“No, and that's the problem” you sigh in frustration “If I show up there without one they’re gonna hook me up with some egotistical dunce face and if that doesn’t work out they’ll send another one” you scowled

“Yeesh sounds stupid” Matsun patted your back

“Yeah all because ‘I’m currently the only person in the family without a partner and they don’t want me to die like an old maid’” you mocked sarcastically

“Well, why don’t you hire a s/o? Can’t you rent a s/o here?” Oikawa suggested

“That’s too expensive I have nowhere near enough to rent one” you sighed

“Why don’t you follow Oikawa’s idea and get a fake one?” Makki 

“Yeah! Someone handsome and irresistible like me!” Oikawa smirked making everyone groan

“No they already know that I’d never date anyone like you” you chuckled at Oikawa’s pouty face

“Yeah you both wouldn’t be able to keep that up, he can’t even keep a real one” Makki mocked making the setter even poutier causing you all to laugh more

“Fine, what kinda boyfriend would convince them” Oikawa irritatedly asked

“Well definitely not someone as goofy as Makki” you thought out loud 

"I’ll take that as a compliment" Makki smiled

“I guess someone responsible, kind, and not a flirt?” You suggested as Oikawa grinned smugly

“Oh, I think I have the perfect guy!” Oikawa smirked victoriously

“Huh who?” You asked befuddled

“He’s sitting right beside you” Oikawa said mischievously as you looked at Iwaizumi 

“Oh yeah! Hajime fits their view of a perfect s/o” you smiled as Iwaizumi began to blush

“Yeah plus you’re both pretty close, it shouldn’t be that hard” Matsun gave a suggestive look to the blushing ace

“I-I mean I don’t really mind if you really want… or need one” Iwaizumi said nervously hiding his face

“Yeah! We’re close buddies which will make it so much easier and less awkward!” You jumped in joy

“Oh but we gotta make it convincing! Tomorrow let’s go out and do whatever the heck couples do!” You suggested

“And we can help with that” Makki interjected as Oikawa and Matsun nodded

“Alright, I’ll see you later then!” You happily ran out of the gym

“I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU THREE” Iwaizumi yelled furiously as the lower years hold him down

“Before you try to kill us at least you’ve basically got to experience what’s like to be with Y/N” Oikawa defended making Iwaizumi scoff

“I know you did that on purpose” Iwaizumi said angrily 

“Like our flat captain said at least you’re gonna go on a date with Y/N” Makki reaffirmed “And with the ideas I have in mind they’ll be head over heels for you” Makki smiled mischievously

After school Makki and Oikawa told you their ridiculous ideas which you mostly ignored. Thankfully the days before the party was the weekends so you both had enough time to make your fake relationship as real as possible. You both decided that the park and the mall would be the best places for fake dates.

“Did you listen to anything they said yesterday?” you asked looking at Iwaizumi

“No, all their ideas were stupid” Iwaizumi scoffed making you chuckle

“Well some of them were good, but after a while, it got stupider and stupider” you said while you both walked to the park

“What do you wanna do first?” He asked

“Well I was thinking we could have like a picnic here for lunch, then do whatever they suggested in the mall” you explained as he nodded

“Well we could start with taking pictures over there” Iwaizumi pointed to the cherry blossom tree which had leaves falling out

“Yeah! That’s a great idea!” You said excitedly as you ran towards the tree

Iwaizumi took pictures of you playing around with the petals that fell off the tree. He had to admit seeing you act like a child looked pretty cute.

“Hajime! You need to be in the pictures too y'know!” You called out as he walked towards you

“Right I forgot sorry” he chuckled “I couldn’t help it though, you looked like a child playing with the petals” he said making you blush

“I guess cherry blossoms make me feel like a child again” you both laughed

You then took a picture of you both laughing in the pile of petals you were both in 

“This is the perfect place for the picnic!” You said as you grabbed the picnic mat from your bag

“You seem pretty excited about all of this despite being all fake” Iwaizumi chuckled as he set the food on the mat

“It’s cuz I like hanging out with you” You smiled brightly as Iwaizumi blushed “I don’t spend as much time with you as I do with the others” you grab the sandwiches you made giving him one

“Yeah… I guess we don’t” he smiled quietly as he ate his sandwich

He hated to admit it but Oikawa and Makki were right. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to indulge the experience of dating you even if it is fake. His thoughts were interrupted as he saw you staring at him.

“Is there something on my face” he spoke as you blinked

“Yeah you’ve this on top of your head” you giggled as you take the flower of his head

“Why don’t you keep it” he suggested taking the flower from your hand as you tilt your head in confusion “You can keep it right up here” he placed the flower in your hair on top of your ear making you blush

“Oh! Like a memory to this day!” You smiled as he nodded

After your little picnic, you both went to the closest mall to do the other things they suggested and later have dinner. But first, you needed to do a little shopping.

“Y/N aren’t we supposed to take pictures to make this thing look real? Why are we shopping?” Iwaizumi gave a half confused half annoyed look

“We need matching outfits for the party! Or wait maybe opposite outfits- outfits! We need outfits for the party!” You explain as you look through the clothing store as he sighed

“I’m guessing this is a formal party?” Iwaizumi said as you threw more possible outfit choices on the cart

“Kinda? It’s always semi-casual and semi-formal but we still need something presentable!” you exclaimed as you put more possible outfits on the cart

“Before we go and look for more why don’t we try some on” Iwaizumi suggested as he emphasized the full cart

You both tried the countless outfits you chose. You have now just realized how many clothes you put in the cart. Luckily you and Iwaizumi could easily sort them since most of them were either too formal or too casual.

“It looks like you mindlessly threw a bunch of clothes in the cart” Iwaizumi said as he looked through the pile of clothes

“Sorry” you smiled nervously “This is the only time we have a gathering so it’s kinda important for my family” you explained as you look through more of the clothes

“You miss them too, right?” Iwaizumi asked as you nod

“Yeah of course! But that’s only after the millions of awkward questions they give me” you sighed

“I see…” Iwaizumi spoke softly

“I FOUND THE PERFECT ONE” you said holding the two pairs of clothes as Iwaizumi sighed in relief

After trying it out you both decided it was definitely the perfect outfit to wear at the gathering. You took the opportunity to take a picture of Iwaizumi carrying the bag since you thought it was very gentleman-like. After eating dinner you both decided to go home.

“Thanks for today Hajime” you smiled as you both walked  “I’m glad we got the day to spend more time together ignoring the reason why” you chuckled making Iwaizumi blush

“No problem it was fun” Iwaizumi smiled as you both walk by the ice cream store

“Oh! Can we go get ice cream” you said excitedly as he chuckled at your adorableness

“Sure my treat” Iwaizumi offered as you smile brightly in excitement

Before you enter the store you both see a little boy gazing at the store

“Mommy, can we go get an ice cream?” The little boy pulled his mother’s arm

“Maybe next time” his mother said making the child pout

“You always say that” the boy sniffed sadly making your heartache “I’m sorry we just can’t afford it” his mother explained as she wiped his tears

You see Iwaizumi walk over to the boy

“Hey little guy you really want an ice cream?” he asked to which the boy nodded

“Oh you don’t have to!” the mother looked at Iwaizumi in embarrassment

“It’s fine ma’am I insist” he smiled “Why don’t you go pick one in the store” Iwaizumi opened the door as the boy jumped in excitement yelling “Yay!” as he went in

“I can’t choose” the boy said as he went up to you “Excuse me miss can you help me?” the boy asked

“Sure! But there’s a lot of cool ones so even for me it's hard to choose” you put your hand on your chin “you could go with this one! Oh but this one’s also good” Iwaizumi chuckled at your indecisiveness

After helping the boy choose you walked out of the store to say goodbye

“What do you say to the kind man and his girlfriend/boyfriend?” The boy's mother asked making you both blush profusely

“Thank you!” The boy gave a toothy smile as you both smiled back

“No problem” Iwaizumi motioned a high-five to the boy as he excitedly did

“Goodbye!” The boy said as they both left

“You know that kid reminds me of you when we were in middle school” Iwaizumi smiled softly 

“Is that why you decided to give him a free ice cream” you teased making him blush

“N-no you used to whine all the time when you didn’t have the money to buy an ice cream until I gave you mine” Iwaizumi looked away in annoyance as you giggled

“I know, thank you for all your ice creams” you smiled

The next day you reviewed the possible questions your family might ask Iwaizumi. After a few more fake dates it was time for the gathering. You both wore the outfits you chose and hopped in an Uber to the family gathering. As you arrived a wave of nervousness hit you.

“Nervous?” Iwaizumi looked over to you as you nod making him chuckle “It’s okay I’m always here” he held your hand making you blush 

“I’m ready” you took a breath as Iwaizumi opens the door for you revealing  that you both were the last ones to arrive

CRAP! WE’RE LATE you nervously panic seeing everyone looking at the two of you but you begin to calm down once you feel him firmly holding your hand. You see your mom waving for your corresponding seats so you both walk over to the table.

“Y/N we were so worried you wouldn’t come” your mother said as she patted down to the two empty seats

“Oh, are we late?” You asked nervously

“No no, everyone just got here early, surprisingly” she said “You’re both right on time, take a seat!” Your mom pats the empty seat again

“Oh right sorry!” Iwaizumi moves the chair for you as you mouth a thank you to which he smiled in response

“What a gentleman” your brother teased sarcastically which you respond with a glare

“Haven’t I seen you before?” Your mother asked 

“I’m part of the volleyball team in the school Y/N goes to and we’ve been on local TV a few times” Iwaizumi explained

“A gentleman and he’s sporty! Didn’t think Y/N was capable of catching such a fish!”  your brother snickered as you roll your eyes

“Where’s dad?” you looked around

“He’s talking to some of our uncles over there” your sister pointed at the wine section

“Right, dad hasn’t even met your boyfriend he’s definitely gonna ask millions of questions” your brother mischievously smiled making Iwaizumi nervous “So while he’s gone why don’t we ask some first” your brother sneered as he put his hands on his chin

“If you don’t mind I’d love to see some pictures of you both together” your mother requested as you gave your phone

That’s why they wanted to do all those fake dates Iwaizumi thought as your mother looks through your phone

“Oh Y/N is this your boyfriend?” Your aunt said excitedly as she walked over to your mom looking through your camera roll

“You finally got a boyfriend? Looks like we were all wrong about you growing into an old maid” your cousin teased making your brother laugh

“Awww you both look so cute!” your aunt squealed making you both blush profusely

After you and Iwaizumi answered the millions of questions from everyone you saw your dad walk over to the table making you extremely nervous. As he sat down he looked over to you and your “boyfriend.” The awkwardness made your brother silently chuckle as you sent a harsh glare to him.

“We should go now” your aunt and cousins zoomed away

“Is this the guy you were talking about when you asked to prepare at your boyfriend’s house?” Your father asked sternly

“Y-Yeah” you replied nervously

“You’re the same age as Y/N? Same school as Y/N? Excellent grades? No school violations?” Your father berated Iwaizumi with questions 

“F/N you’re scaring them” your mother lightly scolded 

“You were the one who wanted them to get a s/o which I didn’t agree with” your father reminded as your mother sighed

“Correction everyone but you wanted Y/N to get a s/o” your brother interjected

“And? I won’t let them end up like you with your… flings” your father scowled in disgust as your brother rolled his eyes

“F/N he’s a genuinely great kid, honest, polite, kind, responsible, and all of that!” Your mother defended “As long as you put your faith in them our child is in good hands” your mother smiled to both of you which eased your nerves

“Alright…” your father huffed “I’ll trust the both of you” your father sighed as he ate making you sigh quietly in relief

After the party was over you were relieved from all that stress. It wasn’t so bad after your mom defended you but you won’t admit you were famished. You decided to personally thank your mom before you left

“Thanks, Mom” you smiled pulling her for a tight hug

“No need to thank me” your mom smiled back and gave Iwaizumi a nod of approval 

“Where’s my hug and thanks? I defended you too y’know” your brother crossed your arms

“Thanks too I guess” you hugged him 

“But we should get going, bye!” You waved as they did the same

“For a fake relationship your father sure made it feel like a real one” Iwaizumi chuckled as you both walk outside

Right, it’s all fake you thought to yourself making your heartache

“Sorry to make you go through all that you really didn’t have to” you spoke quietly

“Y/N you don’t need to worry I’d never hesitate in doing this again” Iwaizumi smiled weakly as your heart skipped a beat

“Why?” you asked frowning at the thought that he’d do anything for you even if it ended him in getting into conflict

“Because…” he stopped

“Because what?” You asked looking to him

“We’re friends” he smiled as you felt an intense wave of sorrow and hurt though you managed to smile back weakly

You turned around to walk away but you soon stopped at the sound of Iwaizumi’s voice

“I don’t want us to just be that” he continued making your eyes widen as your heart starts beating fast

“I did all this because I care about you a lot… more than a friend even” you turned around to see Iwaizumi starting to tear up

“I know it was all fake but I enjoyed every second… It may be selfish of me but… I don’t want it to end” Iwaizumi spoke his voice was shaky as he tried to hold his tears back 

“I love you Y/N… I don’t want to let you go” tears poured from Iwaizumi’s cheeks as you embraced him tightly shocking him 

“Don’t worry” you spoke softly “I don’t wanna let go either” he looked at you with shock as you gave him a sweet smile

“Can we continue it for real this time?” You asked as he placed a kiss on your forehead

“I’d love to” he smiled

Tsukishima

You've always been surrounded by your fans everywhere you went. School was no exception. During break, every student would try to sit with you and if there were partnerships or group projects you'd always be the first to be asked. You really didn't mind as you appreciated all the support and this was the price to pay when you made the biggest hits in Japan. The only thing you particularly minded was when you have over-the-top obsessed fans or stalkers. Luckily in public, you could easily avoid them however this one obsessed fan was unfortunately in your school. Still, it wouldn't be that hard with the mass amount of students at the school but unfortunately, you shared one class with this “fan”.

“Good morning class. Just like last semester I'm going to change your seating arrangement again” your teacher said as you start to worry

She then guides your classmates one by one to their seats as you were left last

“And Y/N over there” she pointed to the empty chair next to Yuta making you pale as white

“You've got to be kidding me” you panicked internally as you went to your seat and sat down

“Hey Y/N” he smiled innocently

“Hey…” you awkwardly smile back

“Looks like we'll be seat buddies” you swore you can hear the sly smile from his voice

“Yeah cool!” you smiled hoping he would drop the conversation

“Yeah! Especially since math isn't your strongest subject right?” He continued

“I can manage” you said with slight coldness in your voice

“Well if you need help I'm right next to you” he smiled finally ending the conversation between the both of you

You felt the life draining out of you during that class. Yuta kept trying to make conversation with you. You were sure he could take the hint and was just talking to you because he could. Luckily during break, you could easily get away from him.

“Hey Y/N over here!” Hinata waved excitedly as you went over to him

“Hey guys” you waved as you sat down

“Is something wrong you looked bummed out” Suga asked with concern

“Well y'know that fan in our school that constantly stalks me” you sighed playing with your food

“You mean your whole fan club” Tsuki rolled his eyes

“No not that one you glared the one that's like a whole different level of creepiness” you explained

“WHAT! THAT CREEP?!” Noya gasped in disgust

“Yeah, we're seatmates now woohoo!” You said sarcastically 

“Can't you ask your teacher to switch?” Asahi asked

“Unfortunately no he's very reputable in the school they're not gonna believe me” you laid your face on the table 

“It's okay Y/N you can get through this!” Hinata encouraged

“Thank you” you hugged him as he returns the hug

“It's a shame math is the only subject none of us share with you” Yamaguchi said sadly

“And it's the only subject they share with him” Kageyama lightly scoffed making you even more bummed out

“I'll get through this!” You tried encouraging yourself

“Stop lying to yourself it makes you more pathetic than you already are” Tsukishima rolled his eyes as you sent a glare

“Looks like it’s gonna be another glare war” Asahi chuckled

“This is gonna be a long day” Daichi sighed in annoyance

After a few more peaceful classes it was time to go home. You thought you would have a peaceful walk home but you were very wrong. As you went to the gate you saw a putrid familiar face waiting for you by the gate.

“Hey Y/N!” Yuta waved as you tried walking past him only for him to walk right next to you

“Hey… Do you need something?” You asked quickly getting annoyed

“I was thinking why don’t we walk home together” he suggested slyly smiling

“It’s okay I’m comfortable going myself” you smiled fakely wanting to punch the grin on his face

“Are you sure? You’re pretty big around here and you won’t be safe getting chased by a mob of fans” he asked with concern as he walked in front of you

Do I even have a choice at this point you thought

“It’s really okay I-” you tried explaining getting quickly interrupted by a hand on your shoulder

“If you’re so concerned about her wellbeing I’ll go with her” Tsukishima nonchalantly said

“Oh! Tsukishima!” You gasped in surprise

“I don’t know, I've only seen you two fighting all the time… Are you sure you aren’t just gonna laugh while they get chased” Yuta narrowed his eyes

“You flatter me” Tsukishima faked a chuckle “Are you giving them a choice to walk with you or are you forcing them to go with you” Tsukishima glared intensely 

“No no, it’s not like that! It’s Y/N’s choice after all” Yuta smiled looking at you as you felt his aura of anger seeth around him

“Thank you for the offer but… We have stuff to do” Yuta gives you a look of confusion as you look at Tsukishima for an excuse as he rolled his eyes

“You’ve already forgotten our homework? Typical Y/N” Tsukishima scoffed in annoyance as you try to hide the urge to smack him

“Yeah! And we're doing it at his house” you smiled innocently

“Alright then stay safe…” Yuta walked away as you sigh in relief

“Jeez, can't you take care of anything yourself? Just say no” Tsukishima crossed his arms

“You said it yourself earlier he wasn’t giving me a choice” you glared harshly as he rolled his eyes

“Whatever” he scoffed “Let’s go before that idiot comes back” he said walking ahead

“Huh? You’re walking me home” you look at him with a very confused face

“Yeah you dumbass we actually have homework” he face palmed as you scoff

“Would it kill you to be nicer” you crossed your arms as you walked

“I’m sorry did I hurt the princess’ feelings?” Tsukishima smiled sarcastically as you glared

“Maybe walking with him would be much better than you” you quietly said

“Huh? Did the pipsqueak say something?” He teased

“I said nothing!” You scowled grumpily

“That’s what I thought” Tsukishima smugly smiled as you both walk outside the school gates

“Thanks again, I mean it” you smiled softly which made Tsukishima blush slightly

“Yeah whatever” he shrugs off as you both walk home

The next day as you arrive at school you are greeted with a tight hug by Hinata while Kageyama chases after him.

“Hi Y/N!” Hinata looked up to you excitedly

“You seem pretty excited” you smiled back

“I’m always excited for volleyball!” Hinata jumped in joy

“HEY! DON’T RUN OFF LIKE THAT!” Kageyama said breathlessly

“I heard from Yamaguchi that you walked home with Tsukishima! What’s up with that?” Hinata asked you curiously ignoring the other fellow

“Oh it’s because Yuta was offering to walk home with me… Actually forcing me is a better term” you sighed

“That guy never knows when to quit!” Hinata pouted making you aww at his adorableness

“At Least Tsukishima was there” Hinata sighed in annoyance

“Yeah… he was good company” you smiled 

“You should file a restraining order on that guy” Kageyama suggested

“I think that’s a bit too much” you chuckled awkwardly

“What are you gonna do about him he doesn’t sound like he’s gonna stop” Kageyama crossed his arms worriedly 

“I’ll go after him and beat him up!” Hinata exclaimed getting into a fighting position making you smile

“Thank you Hinata but I’m sure there’s another way to resolve this without any violence or getting the authorities involved” you ruffled his hair as Hinata put his hand on his chin

“I guess you’re gonna have to deal with that until you figure out a solution” Kageyama sighed

“I’VE GOT AN IDEA!” Hinata thought out loud 

“No” Tsukishima stated coldly

“Come on! It’s the only solution!” Hinata pouted angrily

“Out of everyone you think of, you pick me? Even the thought of pretending to be with her repulses me” Tsukishima scoffed

“You sure picked a nasty one” you rolled your eyes

“Exactly! He’s grumpy, nasty, and intimidating! It will definitely scare off all the creeps!” Hinata triumphantly said hoping you’d both be convinced

“I mean if it will keep him away…” you looked at Tsukishima

“The final answer is no. If you excuse me I have to get to class” Tsukishima walked away annoyed as you sighed

“Wait! We share a class!” Hinata ran as he caught up with Tsukishima

“Don’t think I know what you’re doing” Tsukishima glared at the shorter fellow

“Doing what?” Hinata asked innocently

“I don’t like her end of story” Tsukishima scowled as he walked faster

“You sure do care too much even if you say you don’t” Hinata murmured as Tsukishima glared 

“This conversation is done” Tsukishima seethed coldly

“I’m just saying who knows maybe if you both pretend to be together, maybe they’ll end up liking you back” Hinata suggested making a small smug grin as Tsukishima stops

You’ve finally reached the class you’ve been dreading to go to. As soon as you go in lo and behold he’s already there waiting, even patting the seat right next to him as if he saved it just for you. You took a deep breath before heading to your seat.

“You look troubled, something on your mind?” He asked 

You wish he would just stop being so hyper-friendly with you and shut up 

“Nothing’s wrong, I’m just tired” you faked a yawn 

“Oh right! You must be exhausted from touring!” He chuckled at his idiocy making you sour

You, fortunately, got through the period and survived all his countless stupid questions. You rush quickly to get out but as you leave the door you get pulled by a familiar glasses wearer.

“Hey! Ever heard of a greeting!” You yell in annoyance as he continued to grab your hand ignoring whatever you said

“You’ll thank me later songbird” you frown at the nickname as Tsukishima drags you to a more secluded area

“What in the world do you want this time?” you asked in irritation as he lets go of your hand

“Is that guy still bothering you?” He asked ignoring your question

“Yuta? Yeah, wouldn’t stop berating me with questions” you rolled your eyes remembering the thought

“I’ll agree to that idiot’s plan” Tsukishima  crossed his arms coldly

“Huh, which plan?” You questioned innocently 

“For someone who has high grades you sure are stupid and forgetful” he smirked sarcastically as you glare  “The fake dating thing idiot” He scoffed

“Really? Thank you!” You hug him tightly as he blushes madly “I don't think I could take his stalking anymore!” You tightened your hug even more as he tried pushing you away

“Maybe ask before you hug me?” Tsukishima grimaced as you let go

“Oh sorry!” You scratched the back of your neck blushing

Later that day others offered to help you make the plan as real as possible. A lot of arguing mostly between you and Tsukishima refusing to do “things that normal couples do”. 

“Please complimenting her every minute is the last thing I’d do” Tsukishima scoffed

“Yeah that’s really cheesy” you rolled your eyes

“You guys said you wanted to trick him! You're gonna have to make cheesy sacrifices” Tanaka crossed his arms as the two of you sigh in annoyance

“The final step is kissing!” Hinata said excitedly

“NO!” You both yelled in unison

“Awww c’mon! If you both don’t wanna do anything we mention kissing would be more than enough” Hinata soured

“Don’t you think for fake dating that’s a bit too much” you reasoned out

“Y/N’s right kissing is overstepping it” Suga agreed as Hinata pouted and crossed his arms

“Then you’re gonna have to do everything else we’ve mentioned!” Noya smiled as you both sighed

The very next day you decided to take your plan into action

“When you both walk into school, hold hands!” Noya instructed as you sulk

“GO! GO! GO!” Noya shouted pushing the both of you into the school gates

Tsukishima nervously puts his hand on yours. His face goes beet red from getting to hold your hand.

“Your hand feels nice…” you smiled sweetly as his blush grows 

“W-what the hell do you mean by that?” Tsukishima asked nervously

“Oh, I thought it would be salty and sour” you giggled as scoffed “But it’s soft… I like it” you smiled softly 

“Your hand feels nice too… I guess” Tsukishima complimented

“Looks like we got the hand holding and complimenting down” you punch a fist in the air and smile, an action that Tsukishima couldn’t help but find cute

Your excitement comes to a close as you realize everyone in the hallway was watching you surprised at the both of you holding hands and having a normal conversation instead of arguing every five minutes

“Right! I forgot everyone in school’s gonna talk about this” you gulp in nervousness

“Not just the school, the whole of Japan” Tsukishima stated nonchalantly making you more nervous

“I’m sorry you're probably gonna get dragged around by the media after this” you said quietly playing with your hands

“Don’t worry it’ll be fine unlike you I can tell them to fuck off” Tsukishima smirked sarcastically as you pout

“That’s because you're a certified jerkwad” you cross your arms 

“Well you’re gonna have to deal with it pipsqueak” he said as the smugness in his tone increasing

“Let’s just get to our first class!” You scowled as you both walk into your first class

You did everything the others instructed you to. You were sure Yuta saw what you both did since he never leaves you alone at school. The gossip between you two was the only thing the school would talk about. Your next class was the dreaded Math class. You were nervous as you didn’t know what to expect when you sat next to Yuta. Taking a deep breath you went in and sat next to him. 

As expected he didn't talk to you for most of the period which made you worry. Usually, he’d annoy you to death berating you with questions, trying to get on your good side in hopes of having a chance with you. Your thoughts were interrupted when your classmate behind you asked a question

“Heya Y/N! Got a question” the girl asked as you turned around

Sure ask away you responded

“Is it true you’re dating Tsukishima? I was so sure you hated him” she chuckled as you felt the anger seething out of Yuta

“Yeah doesn’t he treat you like garbage?” Yuta interjected coldly 

“Well he may be an annoying asshole but I kinda like that about him” you explain as the tint on your cheeks grows red “I guess he’s not good with showing how he really feels but… I know for sure he cares” you continue “Ohhh! I get it! You’re that kinda gal!” she lightly punched your arm as you giggled

“Yeah I guess so…” you murmured as you felt Yuta’s boiling anger but you chose to ignore it

The whole Math class felt like a breath of fresh air. You didn’t care if you just felt anger from your seatmate. You were finally free now from his stupid questions. After your class finishes you happily walked to lunch and sat next to your usual lunch buddies

“Someone’s in a really good mood” Yamaguchi smiled 

“Yuta left me alone the whole class!” You exclaimed in triumph as everyone sighs in relief

“See! Our plan was foolproof!” Tanaka and Noya said proudly in unison

“Yeah, if it hadn't I would’ve beaten you both to a pulp” Tsukishima scowled

“Alright Mr. Salty Pants you need to calm down” you patted his shoulder as he rolled his eyes

“Don’t call me that pipsqueak” Tsukishima brushed your hand off

“Giving each other nicknames? Are you sure you guys are still fake?” Hinata whispered mischievously as you both blush

“I’ll just return to my food” you brushed Hinata off and started eating as Tsukishima quietly did the same

“At least they aren’t arguing anymore” Daichi sighed in relief

As soon as school finishes you wait at the gate for Tsukishima to be done practicing. You take a long sigh of relief. Besides dealing with the media and school your “stalker” would finally leave you alone. Or so you thought.

"Y/N!" you hear a voice call out as you turned to face them only to be surprised by an angry Yuta walking towards you

"Yuta? I thought you’d be home" by now you spoke innocently as his anger grows

"Cut the innocent bullshit! I know you both aren’t a thing" Yuta yelled coldly as he grabbed you

"Huh? What’re you talking about?" you chuckled nervously trying to push him away

"It was all to make me leave you alone right? C’mon, you really think I was that stupid?" He snickered loudly as you begin to tear up in fear

“Aww don’t cry you’ve got your “boyfriend” to save you- Oh wait he’s not really your boyfriend” he continued to laugh though he soon stopped as you heard the sound of a blow to his face

“Don’t touch someone who’s off limits” Tsukishima scowled angrily as you rushed to hug him tightly

“Don’t make me laugh I know it isn’t real” Yuta said as he got up

“You’re just whiny because unlike you I got their attention” Tsukishima smirked smugly as he received a blow from Yuta

“Tsuki!” You rushed towards his aid as he brushes you off

“Don’t worry I’ve been wanting to kick his ass for a while” Tsukishima said as he got ready to punch him again

“Stop! You’re only gonna get hurt!” You cried out as Yuta slowly approaches the both of you only for a familiar tangerine to drop kick Yuta onto the ground

“I’ve waited forever to do that!” Hinata smiled victoriously as Yuta gets up and runs away

“YEAH RUN YOU COWARD” Hinata yelled 

“Where did you learn to do that?” You asked as he chuckled

“I’ve been practicing with Noya!” Hinata smiled as you ruffle his hair

“You should take Tsukishima to the nursing office. I'll head back and tell the others!” Hinata quickly said as he ran off

“You haven’t finished practice?” you look towards Tsukishima

“Yeah I needed to get something then I found you with him” Tsukishima explained

“Let’s just get you the nurse’s office” you said worriedly as you helped walk him to the nurse’s office

Luckily for the both of you the nurse’s office was empty which saved you both an explanation and or potential punishment. You ushered him to sit down as you grabbed the necessary items to treat his lip. 

“I’m sorry” you mumbled quietly as soon as you finished treating his lip

“What for?” Tsukishima asked holding the ice pack on his lip

“For all of this the fake dating and dragging you into this” you look down as the guilt builds up

“You really don’t have to apologize for that after all I agreed to do this” Tsukishima placed his hand on yours to comfort you

“But you ended up getting hurt because of me” you began to tear up

“It doesn’t matter if I get hurt” he wiped the tears from your cheeks “I would protect you no matter what, whether we're together for real or fake because… I care about you…” he confided pulling you into a tight embrace

“Thank you” hugged him back tightly “y'know… we don't have to keep calling it fake” you smiled 

“What do you-” he gave you a puzzled look as you interrupted hin

“We could do it for real if you want” you blushed shyly

“Yeah… I wouldn't mind that” he smiled

Kuroo

You were in the middle of doing your homework when Bokuto dragged you to come with him to his li’l hangout session in the park with Kuroo.

“Why did I have to come again?” you asked slightly annoyed

“Because Akaashi didn’t want to come” Bokuto frowned, “He said he was busy or something” Bokuto childishly crossed his arms

“Well couldn’t you go there alone? I was in the middle of doing my homework” you pouted

“C’mon! Don’t you wanna spend time with your favorite big brother and his friend!” He tried convincing you with his sad frown

“You’re my only big brother” you narrowed your eyes as his face brightens up

“So you agree?” he smiled triumphantly as you sighed in amusement. You did need a little break anyways

“Well then you’re gonna have to convince Akaashi to help me with my homework as a thank you” you tried to compromise as he nodded his head excitedly

“YEAH! WE GET TO HANG OUT AGAIN!” Bokuto hugged you tightly making you smile at his adorableness

“Alright you goof we don’t wanna keep Kuroo waiting” you patted his back making him release the hug as you both turned to leave

“THERE’S AN ICE CREAM TRUCK OVER THERE!” Bokuto yelled excitedly pointing at the ice cream truck at the front of the park

“LET’S GO!” He dragged you with him running a thousand miles per hour

You both ran to the ice cream shop, terrifying the people on the way and the worker from how fast Bokuto ran. You both bought ice cream for yourselves and Kuroo (which you paid for).

“You owe me two favors now” you warned as Bokuto continued eating his ice cream

“Thank you!” He smiled adorably making you sigh

“Don’t think your adorableness is getting you out of what you owe me” you glared

“Where’s Kuroobro” Bokuto looked around for his black-haired friend but to no avail

“Did he say he was already here?” you asked as Bokuto nodded

“If he doesn’t show up do I owe you an extra favor” Bokuto spoke timidly as you nodded making him gulp

Ironically right after he said that Kuroo appeared out of nowhere looking like he just killed someone

“KUROOBRO!” Bokuto yelled putting his hands on the air in excitement as Kuroo shushes him

“Not the time right now!” Kuroo whispered loudly as you and Bokuto look at each other tilt your head in confusion

“What’s wrong?” Bokuto whispered quietly as Kuroo dragged you both somewhere private near the tree area

“Will you just tell us what’s happening you whispered angrily” as he sighed

“While I was walking around waiting for you guys I met my ex near a bench” Kuroo explained 

“Yeah and?” Bokuto asked naively as you elbowed his arm making him mutter an “ow!”

“Don’t you remember what happened Bo? You were the one who told me all this” you narrowed one eye as he looked at you dazed

“I kinda forgot about her” Bokuto shrugged as you and Kuroo both sigh

“Well my forgetful owl friend she’s still not over me and thinks we still have a chance even if i clearly showed that there is no chance whatsoever” Kuroo frowned 

“Has she been following you since?” You asked as he nodded frustratedly sighing in the process “Yeesh” you patted his back

“Well if you don’t wanna see her we can just stay here I mean we’re all here anyways Bokuto sat down in the grass Ice cream?” Bokuto offered the ice cream you bought for Kuroo as he sat down “Let’s figure something out tomorrow” you offered as he smiled “You both owe me one afterall” you smirked eating your ice cream as Kuroo looks at you with confusion

“What?” Kuroo looked at Bokuto as he gave him an awkward smile

The next day Kuroo couldn’t practice properly thinking about what happened yesterday. It wasn’t long till his team noticed his change in behavior.

“Hey Kuroo, is there something wrong you're acting very off today” Inuoka asked 

“Huh? Nothing’s wrong” Kuroo brushed off as he went to grab the ball

“Something is clearly wrong you aren’t playing properly” Yaku reprimanded as Kuroo rolled his eyes

“Nothing to be concerned about! Let’s get going!” Kuroo insisted

“For the last hour you haven’t practiced properly” Yaku glared “So tell us what’s wrong. Now” Yaku crossed his arms as Kuroo sighed deeply in response going over to the benches before he sat down

“When I went outside to hangout with Bokuto and Y/N, I met my ex” Kuroo explained quietly shocking everyone “Long story short, she’s not over me” Kuroo frowned

“Knowing her I wouldn’t be surprised if she enrolled here just to see you” Kenma spoke nonchalantly making Kuroo sweat

“That would be awkward especially if you have to share a class” Yamamoto added as Yaku elbowed him

“Let’s hope either of that doesn’t happen” Yaku sighed 

“She’d be near impossible to get away from then” Inuoka said worriedly 

“I would die if I saw her attending my games” Kuroo spoke deflated putting his hands on his head

“Let’s try to devise a plan after school we’ll have more time” Yaku suggested as he stood up “For now, you don’t have to force yourself to play in that kind of state” Yaku said empathetically

The whole practice Kuroo was moping around much to the dismay of his teammates. He thought the day wouldn’t get any worse until it was time for him to go home.

“Looks like I got through that pretty fine” Kuroo exclaimed proudly

“If acting mopey the whole practice was fine I don’t even want to know what would happen if you actually meet her” Yaku sighed

“Let’s hope that doesn’t happen” Inuoka said worriedly

“Don’t worry I just have to make it to my house! She’s not gonna appear anytime soon” Kuroo walked towards the gate but was stopped by Kenma pulling him

“Huh? What was that for–” Kuroo gave Kenma a confused look but his face immediately froze when Kenma pointed in front of him

“I think you jinxed yourself” Lev gulped sheepishly

“Did she actually enroll here?” Yamamoto gasped quietly as Kuroo’s ex walks over to them

“CRAP SHE’S COMING” they all panic internally 

“Hey…” his ex said meekly making everyone sweat nervously

“What… what are you doing here” Kuroo slightly grimaced

“Oh i just… wanted to see how you were doing” she mumbled smiling awkwardly which slightly angered the team’s captain

“Didn’t I make it clear at the park already” Kuroo slightly snapped though remained composed as everyone looked at him

“Yeah! But…” she gets cut off by Kuroo’s sigh

“It’s over alright? Just leave me alone” Kuroo growing angry he quickly walked out of the gate while everyone followed him

During the walk home it was pure dead silence accompanied by the angry aura that radiated Kuroo. No one dared to ask if he was okay in fear of further pissing off the captain. The next day Kuroo along with Kenma went to the lockers before heading to class.

“Hey Kuroo sorry for not being to help you during that whole ordeal yesterday” Kenma apologized as he opened his locker

“Eh don’t worry about it” Kuroo shook his hand vertically “It’s not your fault she’s can’t take no for an answer” Kuroo sighed in annoyance as he opened his locker

The two boys then saw a letter inside the locker making them both groan

“You thinkin what I’m thinkin?” Kuroo gave a look of irritation getting a nod from Kenma as a response as he opened it

The letter contained a cringeworthy, half-assed apology going on and on and had endless paragraphs that the two boys didn’t even bother to read

“I’m not reading this shit” Kuroo crumpled the paper and threw it at a nearby trash can

“Looks like she really won’t leave you alone” Kenma stated nonchalantly making Kuroo sigh

“Yeah I need to break it to her delusional self fast” Kuroo huffed throwing his hands on his head in frustration

“Yeah you better get on that quickly” Kenma shook Kuroo’s shoulder and pointed into his classroom “Looks like she’s your new classmate” Kuroo’s eyes widened 

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?” Kuroo whined loudly

“Well good luck” Kenma waved goodbye as Kuroo nervously went inside the classroom

During the whole class Kuroo’s ex tried everything to try and talk to him. Even with Kuroo’s clear signs of rejecting her advances she still persisted. The whole ordeal lasted the whole class until he was finally able to get out to which he proceeded to go quickly to the gym.

“GUYS I NEED IDEAS NOW!” Kuroo yelled as he slammed the door open

“Yeah we heard from Kenma that you now share a class with her” Yaku sighed worriedly

“YEAH ON MY FAVORITE CLASS? THE ONLY ONE I’D ATTEND INSTEAD OF PRACTICING!” Kuroo moped and messed his hair in frustration

“Well you’re in luck!” A familiar booming voice was heard outside of the gym

“BOKUTO IS HERE TO SAVE HIS BRO!” Bokuto yelled excitedly as his other team went into the gym

“THANK YOU BRO” Kuroo went to the fellow ace and hugged him as his whole team sighed

“We’ll do that after our practice match” Akaashi reminded slightly deflating the both of them

After the two teams' practice match they decided to devise a plan once they headed to the bench. Kuroo took the time explaining what happened during his class.

“That girl is borderline obsessed with you” you gave a very creeped out face 

“I know right! No matter how many times you say no or make it clear to her stupid brain she doesn't get it!” Kuroo's words seethed anger

“You could expel her from the school!” Bokuto suggested proudly

“That'd only solve his problem in school but not everywhere else” Akaashi stated making Bokuto sigh in defeat

“Why don’t you get a s/o? She’ll probably leave you alone if she sees you with someone else” Kenma nonchalantly suggested as he played on his console

“That’s a great idea!” Kuroo smiled victoriously

“You still need to find someone who’s nice enough to help your sorry self” Yaku sassed as Kuroo responded with a harsh glare

“Y/N can do it!” Bokuto pointed as Kuroo blushed

“Huh? Why me?” you made a grossed out face

“Cuz he’s my best friend! And he needs saving!” Bokuto reasoned 

“That doesn’t answer my question” you crossed your arms

“Well… you're my sibling and you should help your big brother!” Bokuto responded as you narrowed your eyes

“I don’t think I have the time to have a relationship right now” you said making your brother frown

“It probably doesn’t have to be real” Kai put his hand on his chin “if you just make it believable enough to fool her that could work” your brother nodded to his statement 

“Please” he looked at you cutely “Can you did it for your big brother and his helpless best friend” he continued as Kuroo scowled

“I can’t say no to that face” you sigh in defeat as Bokuto jumps up

“Another victory for Bokuto Kotaro!” Bokuto jumped around excitedly

“Y/N would work after all Kuroo does–” Kenma said before his mouth was covered by Kuroo

“Because you're also my friend, yeah!” Kuroo awkwardly smiled as you looked at him weirdly

“Let's start tomorrow then so we can get this done” you spoke to which Kuroo nodded

“Looks like your dream come true with my sibling is coming true” Bokuto whispered teasingly smiling as Kuroo shushed him 

The next day after you finished school you headed to Kuroo’s school and waited outside the gate together with your brother.

“Bo you didn't have to come all the way here I can take care of myself” you said while you watched the students pass by

“Yeah but who would third wheel your date” Bokuto smiled mischievously It will make it more authentic he added

“You’re a really great friend to Kuroo” you smile which Bokuto returned with a big toothy one

“Heya guys!” Kuroo yelled from a distance as he ran over to the both of you “Shall we make Operation Get Rid Of My Ex a go?” Kuroo smirked as Bokuto nodded excitedly

‘This is gonna be so chaotic’ you thought

“Let’s go!” Bokuto grabbed all of you and you three were off

You went to a cozy cafe in Tokyo with a few people coming in and out

“Y’know for someone so obsessed with you it’s weird how she isn’t here yet” you spoke as you drank your coffee 

“What if she doesn’t come! That would make everything a waste!” Bokuto pouted “Well except the food” he said in annoyance as he ate his croissant 

“There’s no way she wouldn't know I was talking about it pretty loudly during lunch” Kuroo explained whilst he ate

“Well she’s here now” you pointed at the open door where Kuroo’s ex sneakily walked in with other customers

“Get into position!” Kuroo whispered as you all did as planned

“Is she watching?” Bokuto nudged Kuroo

“Yeah!” Kuroo replied

You and Kuroo did whatever couples did during dates whilst Bokuto made your stereotypical third wheel make an awkward date. Luckily you were able to play it naturally as you were already pretty close with Kuroo. You couldn’t deny that you found it cute how hard Kuroo was trying. He was very easy going and made sure to ask for your consent before doing something.

“I need to go to the toilet, I’ll be back” you stood up and left leaving the two boys

“I think you’re taking this way too seriously” Kuroo chuckled

“Not as seriously as you seriously enjoying this” Bokuto retorted making Kuroo blushed

“Listen when you decided to set us up you knew what you were doing” Kuroo fought back

“Well yeah! It’s a bros job to get him with the girl of his dreams” Bokuto laughed smugly

“Now you just sound dramatic” Kuroo rolled his eyes

“Maybe but you can’t deny you're enjoying this” Bokuto smirked

“Alright you got me there” Kuroo raised his hands as you came back

“Is the plan working?” you asked quietly 

“Judging from how creepily she’s been keeping a close eye on us, yeah!” Kuroo smiled victoriously

“We just gonna continue from here then” you said

Kuroo’s ex followed you all everywhere keeping a close tab on you and Kuroo especially which made you very uncomfortable. The three of you both finished every activity you had planned for the day so you all opted to go home. 

“Is she still following us?” Bokuto asked quietly

“Yeah I can feel her eyes on my back” Kuroo replied

“Still? She's so creepy man” Bokuto's face turned to disgust

“I feel bad that you had to go through this for the past few days” you patted Kuroo's back as he sighed

“Yeah it's like I get no privacy anywhere besides my house, everywhere I go she's there too”” Kuroo crossed his arms and pouted “Well I guess it’s more enjoyable cuz your here” Kuroo looked at you and smiled making your heart thump

“T-thanks” you said still dazed from what he said

“Hey! What about me!” Bokuto pouted which Kuroo laughed in response

“Of course you too bro!” Kuroo chuckled turning Bokuto’s frown upside down

“We’ll see tomorrow what she thinks” you said as you all reached Kuroo’s house

“Thanks again today was fun” you smiled making Kuroo slightly blush

“Yeah! My pleasure” Kuroo smiled back

The next day Kuroo went through the whole day without his ex bothering him which made him suspicious. But when he did see her in chemistry class she seemed quiet and was distancing herself from him which Kuroo couldn’t help but feel the intense wave of victory. You saw the joyous captain when he walked to you and Bokuto at the gate.

“Someone looks very happy today” you smiled as Kuroo greeted both of you

“She kept her distance the whole day! I say progress!” Kuroo almost squealed in excitement

“All in a day's work of The Best Ace Bokuto!” Bokuto smiled proudly

“Yeah that’s great!” you flashed a thumbs up

“We just need to seal the deal” Kuroo put his finger on his chin before his face lit up “Prom’s this weekend which I think is the perfect opportunity to do it” Kuroo explained “Can I go too! I wanna eat all the food!” Bokuto jumped in excitement which made you chuckle

“Yeah we can all go!” Kuroo  gave a toothy smile

A few days before prom you were in the mall with Akaashi and Bokuto deciding which of the dresses you should buy

“Should I go for this one or this one?” you said holding two dresses

“We’ve been here for like… HOURS!” Bokuto complained as he fell back on the chair

“And? It’s a formal event that needs the proper attire! I need to look my best!” You defended hearing another complain from Bokuto

“Why do you care so much you didn’t care that much last prom!” Bokuto crossed his arms

“Is it because of Kuroo?” Akaashi asked innocently yet you felt there was more intention in his tone

“W’what? N-no?” You blushed hardly surprised from Akaashi’s question

“Looks like I hit a bullseye” Akaashi nonchalantly said

“You like Kuroo?” Bokuto stood up and looked at you

“No! I don’t! It’s just I wanna look my best to make it look real y'know!” You kept trying to defend yourself though Akaashi could see right through you

“You wanna look your best for Kuroo you mean” Akaashi teased to which you glare

“I never thought you’d like my bro!” Bokuto smiled excitedly

“Well, until now” Akaashi smirked which made you blush even more

“Just pick one I’m done with this conversion!” You pointed daggers at the two boys which made Bokuto snicker

It was the day of the prom and Kuroo was very nervous. Though it was only to get rid of his ex he felt that he’d actually taken you to prom and though he didn’t want to admit it but he really wanted to see what you’d look like in your prom dress.

“You look a little too excited” Yaku teased 

“Well yeah! I’m actually going to prom with them!” Kuroo blushed “It still makes me sad though that all this is fake” Kuroo frowned his face darkened

“Well I guess you have to make the most of it right?” Kenma interjected hoping to cheer his best friend up

“You’re right” Kuroo smiled 

“She’s here now!” Lev exclaimed making Kuroo shift back to nervousness

The door opened with Bokuto in a neat tux with a surprisingly formal hairstyle different from his spiked up hair but beside him was you in an elegant outfit also with a formal hairstyle

“Amazed? You should be! I picked it for them just for my best bro!” Bokuto bragged proudly

“You only picked it so we’d get out of the store” you chuckled as Bokuto shot a quick shush

“That doesn’t change the fact that you look pretty elegant” Kuroo scratched the back of his neck in shyness the team were smiling right next to him

“Well let's leave you both to it” Yaku grabbed the others giving the two alone space

“Well? Let’s get started” you smiled excitedly as you dragged Kuroo to the dance floor 

You both couldn’t deny the fun you both had dancing and partying. You had to admit that this was the most fun you had with Kuroo. You felt saddened that after all this your “relationship” was going to end. Though you made sure you made the most out of the time you had left.

“I’m going to the restroom can you get me some more punch when I get back” you asked as Kuroo nodded

“Anything for you m’lady” Kuroo teased as you lightly slapped his shoulder

“Alright you big goof I’ll be off” you chuckled as you went to the bathroom

As Kuroo went to the area with he punch he noticed his ex walking towards him as he got some punch for the both of you making him sigh in annoyance

“What do you want” Kuroo said coldly “Don’t think I didn’t see you follow me a few days ago with my date” he glared putting emphasis on date

“I know but I just want you to give me one chance… just one” she pleaded

“Isn’t what you’ve seen already enough for you to leave me alone” Kuroo snapped

“You don’t have to pretend to be with someone just because you don’t wanna give me a chance” she said making Kuroo laugh

“I think you need to get your brain checked sweetheart you’re acting very cuckoo” Kuroo sneered

“We both know that date was one sided” she scowled taking him back “It’s sad that they pitied you that much that they’d agree to go to prom with you” she continued as Kuroo growed in anger 

“And what? My feelings for them are real! So shove that chance you think you have in your ass!” Kuroo snapped slamming the table next to him “After all it's only good for pleasing other guys isn’t it” Kuroo glared intensely shocking his ex 

“You–” She tried to speak out though she was interrupted by Kuroo

“Whether it’s real or not, they care more about me more than you ever have!” Kuroo scowled the argument grew more heated

“You know you don’t and won’t ever have a chance” she gritted her teeth

“Even so I’d rather chase someone who cares about me even only platonically then a cheating whore” Kuroo clenched his fist“Even if we’ll be stuck as friends forever I’ll live with that I’ll even push those feelings back” Kuroo tried holding his tears back as some began to fall

“Fine let it be that way” she said “Just know you’re pathetic especially for your feelings for them” she walked away leaving Kuroo alone

Unbeknownst to Kuroo you heard everything he said about you. You felt your heart rapidly thumping from everything he professed about you even more so at the thought that he felt those feelings for you and was willing to push them back for you just so you’d both stay as friends. As you were dazed however you noticed Kuroo looking at you.

“I… How long were you watching?” Kuroo sniffed 

“Enough to hear the whole thing” you replied back quietly

“I see…” he looked down trying to wipe the tears

You felt the tension between the both of you grow bigger and bigger you had to say something

“Did you mean all the things you said to her?” You asked 

“Yeah every single one” Kuroo nodded

“Even the part where you’d accept us just being friends” you played with your fingers

“Listen Y/N nothing’s gonna change I promise we can still be best friends and–” Kuroo stopped as he felt your soft lips press against his

“You don’t need to accept us just being friends, I want it to be more” you smiled brightly as he blushed

“Yeah I’d love that!” He spoke as he pulled you for another kiss though you both stopped as soon as you heard a loud YEAH!

“MY PLAN WORKED!” Bokuto let out a very mischievous laughter followed by Yaku punching his elbow

“You ruined their moment!” Yaku scolded

“Sorry I can’t help it!” Bokuto rubbed his elbow 

“Well I’ll have to thank my best bro!” Kuroo cheered “I’M THE BEST BROTHER AND BRO IN THE WORLD” Bokuto yelled in joy with the biggest toothy smile

“Yeah you really are” you smiled brightly

[kisskawa]

— kiss me quick

the first time you’d kissed iwaizumi had been delicate and affectionate and fake.

the focus of his grandma’s excited interrogation, you’d been bombarded with questions since your arrival and the kiss had been the only way to consolidate your clunky answers. they’d been awkward though true, and admitting your first attraction to iwaizumi had your tongue drying and cheeks warming far sooner than expected.

the kiss had smoothened your stammering words, endearing in their shyness. and perhaps most importantly, it had been enough to convince iwaizumi’s family to all take a step back, giving you space to let out a shaky exhale.

iwaizumi eyed you gratefully, gaze fond and ever so caring it made your chest ache. his hand hadn’t left yours since he had picked you up for the family gathering and he squeezes yours tightly. a thank you maybe, or just a sign to say i’m here, it’s ok.

but you hadn’t felt alright. not when your breath rattled through your lungs and your lips tugged into a forced smile, stuck in a way that hid your fake relationship, your true feelings.

you finally let the cover drop in iwaizumi’s car, surrounded by the comfort of his warm leather seats, the familiar smell of his cologne and the stack of pay-and-display parking tickets that tracked your chronicles together. the sigh that escaped you had been building throughout the day and now seemed unavoidable as your chest heaved. idle fingers worked at the seams of the passenger seat, trailing stitches up and down until iwaizumi’s hand lifted from the gearstick to place your palms together again.

“you ok?” he murmured, hardly louder than the radio’s static.

you hummed non-committally, gaze fixed on your intertwined hands as your feelings began to overwhelm, presenting themselves in the form of pesky heat, pricking terribly at your eyes.

a call of your name snapped you out of your haze, stern this time. and you realised iwaizumi was squeezing your hand once more, scenery no longer moving around you.

your silence didn’t last long, it never did around hajime.

“please don’t ask me to do this again,” your voice nothing more than a whisper, “i can’t do this again.”

“ok,” iwaizumi’s reply came simply, “i never meant to make you feel uncomfortable or bad, i’m sorry.”

you shook your head, eyes tightly shut, “it wasn’t. i’m never uncomfortable around you, i just--” your words choke you, but still, you will them out, tumbling gracelessly as they expel from your throat, “please don’t kiss me if you don’t mean it.”

hajime falters, “what if i do?”

your eyes open. “what?”

“what if i meant it when i kissed you?”

“i think,” you swallow, “if you meant it back when you asked me to come with you,” you peek a nervous glance at iwaizumi who nods, confirming your suspicions, “then you’re an idiot.”

hajime bursts into laughter, taken by surprise at the sudden return of the you he’s so familiar with, the you he so adores.

“you would’ve said yes if i asked you normally?” hajime checks once his amused guffaws have trickled down into fond little chuckles.

you roll your eyes, smiling all the same as you answer, “when have i ever said no to you?” hajime grins, lips curved as he presses them against your knuckles. plans run through his mind already, thoughts going a mile a minute with you by his side. the car moves off again.

[katszumi]

“haji?” his name escaped your lips in a whisper.

the lamps from the street lit up the night sky, the stars from above doing it’s best to keep the night awake. still, darkness surrounded the area, only dark figures could be depicted from their eyes.

you could only guess it was close to midnight from the way the moon shone and the cold slap of wind that gushed your way. however, the quick warmth of your face and the rapid throb inside of your chest disregarded the chills.

iwaizumi analyzed you, his eyes wandering your body as if you were a stranger.

“haji, what are you doing here?”

his lips parted, he wanted to answer you, but he wasn’t even sure why he ran to your house at midnight. he just needed to see you.

“my flight is tomorrow.” he announced like you hadn’t known. all of the third years celebrated one final time before his departure, resulting in endless laughter and tears. as much as he didn’t want to admit it, he didn’t want to leave japan behind, because you were still here.

“i know. that’s why you should be getting some sleep, you have a long day tomorrow.” you forced yourself to swallow; to eat away the gnawing feelings that were in the back of your throat aching to come out. you didn’t want to put that burden on him, especially at a bad time like this.

iwaizumi dryly chuckled. of course you were trying to care for him, but he could see the wistful look you gave him. he could tell you were tired due to the bags under your eyes, but your eyes were wide with adoration and hope.

he took a step forward, “you’re too kind, you know that?” his words soft. “can i sleep here tonight? i can’t wake up to an empty room, i just can’t.” he rambled.

without hesitation, you widened the door for him to come inside. you knew it probably wasn’t a good idea for him to stay, but, who were you to tell hajime iwaizumi no?

quickly, iwaizumi welcomed the warmth of your home to his body. his eyes traveled the rooms nearby, he took a mental screenshot, because who knew when was the next time he’d be here or if you even still lived here when he’d come back. he wanted to remember as much of you as he could, but he knew the figments of his memory just wasn’t enough.

he followed you to your bedroom, the two of you sitting next to each other on your queen-sized bed. he always loved the size of your bed, it seemed to fit him more than his own bed at home.

“i’m sorry for knocking at your door so late.” he apologized, his eyes finally settling in to the dimly lit room. he could now make out your features that he was so infatuated with.

“don’t worry about it. i’ll always answer the door for you, haji.” and god, he loved the way his name fell from your lips. like you were destined to say only his name only.

iwaizumi sighed, “america is going to suck without you or oikawa there. it’s like i have to start all over again, just without the company of you two.” he confessed.

your hand found his, gently grabbing it and rubbing circles against his rough skin. you could feel the callouses that were starting to form on his palm, most likely from lifting weights.

he allowed you to fiddle with his hands, he found solace in your touch. his eyes closing for the first time tonight.

“you’ll do great in america. you’ll find new friends and new company to keep you busy. who knows, you might even find someone you’re interested in.”

immediately, his eyes flew open, his head turning to face you. haven’t you realized that it was you he was interested in. it was you that won his heart years ago.

“wha—“ you said from his sudden turn, wondering if you said something wrong, but he interrupted you before you could finish.

“i don’t want to do that. i don’t want to find someone i’m ‘interested’ in. it’d be useless anyway.” he murmured the last part.

now your ears piqued at his comment.

“what do you mean it’d be useless?”

he paused. “i’d be searching for you in every girl i’d meet.” iwaizumi declared. “that’s why i’m here, y/n. it crushes my soul that i’m leaving you behind. i want you by my side, i feel empty whenever you’re not.”

you could’ve sworn that you heard a sniffle emit from the male beside you, but you knew not to comment on it, or he’d probably end the conversation right there.

you cupped his cheek with your hand, a half smile forming on your face. only you were able to see this side from him; the affectionate, tender side that no one else have been able to witnessed.

“it breaks my heart you’re leaving me too. but i know you’re destined for great things. but i know you’ll be able to visit and i’ll always be a call away. it hurts me knowing my two soulmates are moving thousands of miles away. but i can’t be selfish, haji. it’s not about me.” you protected your feelings, because you knew if it turned into more, the morning would be too much of a heartbreak.

iwaizumi shook his head. “but i want you to be,” he pleaded. “i don’t want to get on that plane tomorrow morning with regret because i didn’t have enough courage.”

“courage for what?” it was a stupid question. you knew what he meant, but you were so nervous.

“to tell you i love you.” his eyes searched you for any discomfort, the words almost causing him to have a heart attack. iwaizumi knew he was bad with feelings, especially with how he dawned this proposal onto you a night before he leaves for another country.

but if he didn’t tell you now, he wasn’t sure if he would even board the plane tomorrow morning.

disregarding your feelings before, you leaned into his touch, your nose touching his. you could feel his breath hitch, the warmth of him radiating onto you. your free hand cupped the other side of his cheek as you pressed your lips onto his. years of emotions spilled from the delicate kiss you shared, like a river overflowing its bank.

and you two laid there, peppering slow kisses on each other’s faces, wiping the tears that slipped from both of your eyes.

iwaizumi knew more than before that he was so terribly smitten with you, but he wished that his final hours with you weren’t ticking away with a plane ticket to america with his name on it.

—

ahhh there’s nothing like a man who’s bad at expressing feelings till the last minute🤌🏽

[adoringhaikyuu]

can u do the “wearing a men size sweater n they think ure cheating” with suna iwaizumi osamu n atsumu?

THEY SEE YOU WEARING A MEN'S SIZED SWEATER AND THINK YOU'RE CHEATING ON THEM | 4

characters: iwaizumi + osamu + suna + (gn!reader)

warnings: none

notes: i've been meaning to do another long hc again, it's been a while. i already did atsumu in part one! + iwa's is set in a college au but they are all adults in every one!

part one | part two | part three

IWAIZUMI ⤵

honestly blame oikawa sfdgfhjk

he really didn't mean any harm by it, he was just being annoying as usual, but in a lighthearted way you know

he made a comment to an already stressed iwa and that's just a recipe for disaster

"you know iwa-chan," oikawa choosed to ignore the glare his friend sent his way, continuing to pester him with a sing-songy voice. "i think it's unfair how you don't let me wear your sweatshirts, but let y/n do." he tilted his head, "although, i'm sure they probably look way better in it than you do."

iwaizumi was about to smack his friend on the back of his head when he paused, hand in the air, confusing him.

he cringed, dramatically waiting for the impact. "if you're gonna hit me just do it already...i'm not a fan of the suspense, iwa."

iwaizumi frowned deeply, dropping his hand, weirdly scaring the other boy even more. "what are you talking about? i didn't give..."

instead of giving oikawa a chance to even react, he stormed off to find you, an uneasy, dark feeling growing in the pit of his stomach when he found you talking to some guy outside your class. luckily, you both had class in the same building today so it was easy to find you.

he stood there for a moment, just watching you, taking you in. you looked cute, but that pissed him off even more, and lit a fire on the spark of insecurity in the pit of his stomach.

were you cold? was that it? if so, then why didn't you ask him for his sweater? did you think he would say no? was he a bad boyfriend?

he was so caught up that he didn't even realize you were walking up to him, a sweet smile on your face. you grabbed his hand gently, your smile turning a bit more curious when you realized he hadn't noticed you approach him.

"hey haji." you squeezed his hand, "you okay?"

he blinked, his tense body immediately loosening up at your presence, but when he looked down at your clothing again, he frowned.

your brows furrowed. "what's wrong?"

he kept his eyes on your sweater. "you and that guy are pretty close huh?"

you looked even more confused for a moment before it clicked. "oh you mean that guy from my class? i mean..." you paused, thinking back to your interactions, trying to determine if you would consider you guys as close, but your boyfriend only took your silence as confirmation for his insecurity induced delusions. "no, not really."

his lips stretched into a smile that looked more like a grimace before dropping less than a second later. "then when'd he give you this?"

you tilted your head, "give me what?"

he pressed his tongue to the side of his cheek, his tell that he was pissed off, which only confused you further. he looked into your eyes, glanced back to your sweater and back to your eyes again.

you looked down as well, the confusion clear on your face as you looked back up at him, a feeling of unease sprouting inside you. "he didn't give me this?" your response came out more like a question and iwaizumi raised a brow and crossed his arms.

"well i didn't."

you looked at him plainly, "you know i have money of my own, right? i bought this myself." you crossed your arms as well, feeling defensive. "why on earth would he have gotten this for me?"

his mouth suddenly felt dry, and guilt washed over him. "i..." he sighed, letting his eyes close. you then realized how stressed and worked up he seemed. "i'm sorry. i was being a dumbass."

you stepped forward, a knowing, worrying look in your eyes as you placed a gentle hand on his arm. "haji you can't keep stressing yourself out like this with no breaks, you know the irrational part of your brain feeds you crazy information when you're like this."

his shoulders sagged embarrassingly as he grunted out a response. "i know."

you narrowed your eyes, "you're lucky i'm more understanding than most. if not i wouldn't have forgiven what you just accused me of."

he looked at you with guilty eyes, pulling you in for a hug by your waist and burying his face in the crook of your neck. "i'm sorry, baby." he mumbled against your sweater, gripping you tight.

you rolled your eyes fondly, patting his back. "yeah yeah. let's go. you need a nap."

OSAMU ⤵

honestly your relationship was fairly new

and he'd rather die than let him know, but atsumu's teasing jokes about his twin needing to hold you tight so you don't go find someone else better did get to him

and he was tired, he'd had a long day at the restaurant

you were meeting up with him for a late dinner after he closed up the restaurant for the night. nothing special, just a quiet evening for the two of you. you got there a little earlier just cause you were excited to see him, honestly. when you reached the door, you nearly bumped into a man walking in at the same time, the both of you too distracted to notice one another.

you both laughed it off and he opened the door for you, letting you walk in first. you just assumed he was being kind, but nothing more.

unfortunately, from osamu's perspective, the two of you looked very familiar with each other. a million thoughts started running through his head unwillingly, his gaze frozen on you smiling up at this man he'd never seen before. his heart dropped when he noticed the sweater you were wearing. it looked like it could fit the man next to you.

had you really already met someone better? but why would you bring him here? to end things?

you and the man continued to have your conversation as you approached the counter, and a very annoyed (and slightlyvery hurt) osamu.

having had enough, he cleared his throat and spoke up in a very monotone voice. "can i help you?"

you both perked up and looked towards the sound, and you smiled recognizing the man you came here to see. the man next to you spoke up, "oh i'm just here to pickup an order."

your boyfriend put both hands on the counter, spread out on either side in front of him, slightly flexing his muscles as he stared the man down. "what are you, the delivery guy?"

the man laughed, "no, man, just picking up a meal to bring home." he pointed towards the bag of takeout on the counter, "i think that might be mine actually––unless it's for you?" he turned to you questioningly, but before you could respond, osamu did it for you.

"we're eating together, actually. as soon as you leave." he raised a brow, daring the man to say something else, but he got the hint, giving an awkward smile to your boyfriend and thanking him for the food before greeting you goodbye and exiting the restaurant.

as soon as the door closed, you furrowed your brows towards osamu, slightly amused. "what's with the attitude?"

he crossed his arms, "he was being too friendly." you rolled your eyes and he tilted his head, looking you up and down. "what's with the sweater?" before he could say the next words that came to mind 'you replace me already?', you spoke up, looking down at your clothing.

"got it for three dollars at the thrift store." you looked up with a smile and his face dropped in realization, only for a complete different reason than you thought. "what's the matter?" your smile turned more mischievous. "don't like the thought of me wearing another man's clothes?" you batted your eyelashes playfully and he scoffed, shaking his head, before letting it hang.

"you have no idea..."

concerned, you made your way around the counter, placing a questioning hand on his back, gasping when he turned around and pulled you into his arms without a word.

"what's the matter, samu?" your voice was soft, careful as you hugged him back.

he simply held you tighter, burying his face in the crook of your neck. "nothin." he mumbled. "m'just never letting you go."

SUNA ⤵

suna's was a little more understanding? i suppose

he was taking a nap when you got to his place

you were at that point in your relationship where you would come over all the time, you even had your own key

and you knew that he was probably taking his after work nap so you decided to come over and order food when he wakes up

but unfortunately during his nap he had a dream (more like nightmare) that you were cheating on him

he woke up, dazed, unsure of his surroundings and overwhelmed by what he just witnessed. he honestly couldn't tell if it was a dream or not because everything looked so real, his house was exactly the same as well. was it a memory? he was so confused.

he'd heard you on the phone talking with your friend about your problem. how you were cheating on him and you didn't want to hurt him, all the while you were wearing this other man's sweatshirt.

his heart rate picked up when he heard you in the living room, talking to someone. he slowly and as quietly as possible, made his way out of his room, practically tip toeing down the hallway to peek around the corner. you were talking on the phone...exactly as you were in the dream. maybe it was a premonition? then his eyes fell to your sweater...it looked exactly like the one he saw.

he went back to his room and got back into bed. maybe if he slept this off, everything would be back to normal. maybe this was the bad dream.

he was tossing and turning but he couldn't seem to fall asleep. so many thoughts were plaguing his mind.

a few minutes later, you made your way into the room. as he heard you coming, he contemplated pretending to be asleep, but he decided against it. he had to face this, right?

you smiled at him sweetly, being quiet so as not to disturb him. you know how cranky he gets when his naps are interrupted or if he's woken up before he needs to be. but when you noticed he was awake, you plopped down right beside him.

"hi baby." you leaned down to kiss his forehead and pulled back to look at him curiously when you felt him tense under your touch. "are you okay?"

he stared at you for a moment. "who were you on the phone with?"

"oh you heard that?" he narrowed his eyes. that was a suspicious answer.

"i'm sorry, i thought i was being quiet, i didn't mean to wake you." okay, maybe not. "i was talking to atsumu. he said he's been trying to plan a reunion dinner and you keep ignoring him." you looked at him pointedly and he rolled his eyes.

okay so you weren't talking to your friend. and you definitely aren't cheating on him with atsumu of all people. but there's still the sweater...

he had to be strategic about this.

"are you cheating on me?"

or not.

he blinked at you, shocked by his own words. you blinked back.

"...are you still asleep?"

he blinked again. "no?"

"are you sure?..."

he narrowed his eyes again. "answer the question."

"babe, i think you need to go back to sleep."

"that's not an answer..." he muttered.

you placed a hand on his cheek and sighed. "no i'm not cheating on you." you tilted your head as you looked down at him. "i'm gonna blame the fact that you're disoriented from your nap for this ridiculous question."

he looked away, suddenly embarrassed at the realization at how dumb he sounded. his voice was small. "then who's sweater is that?"

you rolled your eyes. "mine, dummy. it's just oversized."

his cheek heated up under your touch and you stifled a laugh. "i should take a picture to remember this."

he glared at you halfheartedly. "fuck off."

you laughed for real this time. "oh come on, you're the one accusing me of cheating cause of my sweater-"

he cut you off, pulling you into his arms. "yeah yeah, take a nap with me then. this way i'll know you're not running off with some other guy while i'm asleep." he teased, a hint of a smile in his voice.

you smacked his chest playfully, shaking your head in disbelief. "you know maybe i should ban you from taking naps if this is the outcome. insane accusations."

"i'd like to see you try." he squeezed you tight and pressed his temple against your forehead. "i'm sorry. wasn't thinking straight." he kissed your forehead. "my dream just messed me up. couldn't tell what was real."

you glanced up at him, hearing the sincerity in his tone. if you were in his position, you would feel conflicted too. "it's okay rin. just know that that could never be our reality, okay? i love you." you kissed his cheek and he smiled.

"love you too."

[omiomi-kyun]

00:07 — unrequited

note: my mind's a bit messy atm. so, uh... yep.

details: angst; iwaizumi x reader; fantasy au; unrequited love; drabble :)

"we grew up together. i always have seen you more like a sibling than anything else."

you were rooted in place as soon as those words left his lips. everyone, including you, believed that you'll eventually be with him. your father and even your brother approved of your potential relationship with him.

he was even smiling during those discussions! so... what exactly is happening right now?

“please, accept my sicerest apologies if i made you misunderstood my feelings towards you. i apologize if i ever lead you on, but...” he sighed. “i already have someone in heart... and you can never replace her.”

“o-oh...” you replied, covering your lips as you let out a chuckle. “is that... is that so?”

tears began streaming down your cheeks. you tried to keep them from coming, but not even your gloved hand, nor the handkerchief could stop it.

“why am i like this? i... i'm happy for you! i'm truly happy for you but why... i need to smile...” you began to ramble like a madman.

iwaizumi stood in front of you, looking helpless as he could neither pull you close to him, nor console you with words. not when he's the reason behind your tear-stained cheeks.

“please call greta for me,” you told him with shaky voice. “she... she'll know what to do...”

his guilt tripled after hearing the name of your lady-in-waiting: the person who owns his affection from the first time they met—someone you trust.

“hajime?”

he took a breath before bowing his head deeply.

you stood there in confusion. until you recalled what you've said moments ago.

“oh... haha... hahaha!” your cackle echoed the empty hallway. he watched as you walk away from him.

“your highness...”

“you're dismissed.”

“your—”

“be well, young lord.”

his body stiffened before lowering his head towards your direction. “understood.”

not long after, a war broke out. leaving the castle in shambles and the long history of your family's bloodline was eradicated from the face of the kingdom.

or so they thought.

[iwaizumis-bitch]

series masterlist

y/n and friends

FACTS:

iwaizumi has no clue why he has so many followers 😭

he thinks 'damn they wanna buy my workout routine!!' but it's just horny ppl (...)

makki and mattsun live together and go to tokyo university

oikawa lives in argentina!!! but he's very active on his phone and tries to visit at least twice a year.

oikawa = pretty rich boy

iwaizumi is the number one thirst trapper and he doesn't even know it 💀

taglist (open): @atrashsith @fckin-buttered-noodles @woahhajime @fantasycantasy @pocketful-ofdaisies @msbyomimi @akisrandom @katszumi @hoperenae @pelicanpizza @wolffmaiden @bloombb @feiwelinchen @lilactaro @toorusluvr @queen-aria-things @pattys-got-cakes

[rishiguro]

EVANESCENT; MASTERLIST

evanescent (/ɛvəˈnɛs(ə)nt,iːvəˈnɛs(ə)nt/) — “soon passing out of sight, memory, or existence; quickly fading or disappearing.”

—an iwaizumi hajime x reader series

GENRE: angst. some fluff and crack to lighten the mood.

WARNINGS: tragedy. major character death. discussions about (terminal) illnesses, death, medical terms, pancreatic cancer and copd. hospitals. language (swearing and suggestive). jokes about illnesses and death. passive suicidal ideation. pet names and insults. atsumu gets bullied (but tbh they all bully each other). mention and consumption of alcohol.

TAGLIST: open. comment to be added — dni rules apply

NOTE: please notify me if any information provided in the info posts (at the bottom) is inaccurate. i‘m no medical professional. this is pure fiction and not based on any real events or people. time stamps are not random.

DISCLAIMER: haikyu!! characters are owned by haruichi furudate. any pictures used are not mine and are there for inspiration only.

INFO: mix of smau and written content. chapters with “✎﹏” include written content. currently replacing the images in chapters 28-43 -> please read the psa on dark & light mode use.

TEASER

INTRODUCTION

(y/n)‘s group | iwaizumi‘s group

CHAPTERS

01; the hot stranger

02; “i didn’t miss this”

03; vending machines ✎﹏

04; dms

05; “absolutely not”

06; date

07; “boyfriend???” ✎﹏

08; rain check

09; apologies ✎﹏

10; “definitely more than friends”

11; “it’s not like i’m dying”

12; visit ✎﹏

13; communication

14; “you look like shit”✎﹏

15; surgery

16; “who are you?” ✎﹏

17; kyoutani kentaro

18; “so who are they?” ✎﹏

19; new steps

20; “wdym he isn’t your boyfriend?”

21; comfort ✎﹏

22; exams

23; “finally”

24; date ✎﹏

25; “totally not your boyfriend”

26; results

27; good news ✎﹏

28; adulting

29; “how’s life?”

30; “allergic to doctors”

31; collapse ✎﹏

32; “i screwed up” ✎﹏

33; back to business

34; “being an adult really sucks”

35; not the full truth

36; love ✎﹏

37; welcome home

38; “i should have a private room”

39; “he doesn’t know?”

40; stage iv ✎﹏

41; “fancy add-ons”

42; daily life

43; bad jokes

44; “brownies? or cookies?”

45; overwhelmed ✎﹏

46; no contact

47; “i’m scared” ✎﹏

48; pinky promise ✎﹏

49; “this is boring”

50; special

51; transferred ✎﹏

52; helpless

53; “wait, you’re going to die?” ✎﹏

54; “i don’t want to talk about it”

55; “i’m not letting you do this alone” ✎﹏

56; tired ✎﹏

57; best friend

58; assistance ✎﹏

59; “i don’t want to die” ✎﹏

60; “since when are nurses hot?”

61; friendship

62; “see you tomorrow”

63; “what?” ✎﹏

64; “i need you”

65; denial

66; visit ✎﹏

67; evanescent

THE END

EXTRAS

about copd | about pancreatic cancer

playlist

STATUS: ongoing. irregular updates.