#izzy is also in love with jack if that wasn't obvious

[something-about-sunflowers]

Ooooooohhhhhhh now I’m thinking of an Izzy with an Ella Enchanted style curse on him hhhhhhhhhh

Read-more cause this got away from me lmfao

He keeps it fairly under wraps for most of his life, sets out to sea at twelve, gets picked up by a press gang at seventeen. He manages, its  expected, for a sailor to follow orders on a navy ship, after all (of course ‘no’ isn't an option available to him anyway).

They get boarded by pirates when he's about twenty one and he’s taken on as part of their crew, the captain is after crew more than loot, tells him he should join (saying ‘no’ would have just had him killed, and he's doing his very best to live).

Some time after, he's nearing twenty five, they’re raided by another ship, the Ranger. Benjamin Hornigold likes a ruthless sailor (a ruthless pirate) and Israel Hands has never allowed himself to be anything but. He decides he wants to keep this one. He offers, Izzy accepts. Ben tells him to kill his former captain (wouldn’t have said ‘no’ even if he could have, the man was a bastard).

He earns a reputation of being kind of a kiss-ass, he doesn’t really mind, it keeps most people from asking questions. But Ben’s got his pet projects Edward Teach and John ‘Jack’ Rackham and they’re both too sharp for their own good (though, Jack is better at playing dumb). They notice its not just Captain’s orders he follows to the letter, but everyone’s. They test him, subtly at first, but eventually they show their hand. Tell him that they know there’s more to Izzy’s obedience than he lets on.

He’s terrified for how they might use this against him (the usual ways, which most men abused without even knowing about his curse, easier, safer to let them think he wanted it) but they tell him they don’t want to take his agency from him like that. They offer to help him. He’s not sure whether to trust it (he knows, by rights, he shouldn’t) but he can’t say ‘no’ to ‘trust us, let us help’ (whether Edward is aware of the command, Izzy will never know, decades later Edward doesn’t even remember what he said to convince him).

So they stick by him, as best they can, if someone gives an order he doesn’t want to follow they’ll tell him, quietly as they can, not to. It works, for the most part. Though eventually, Ben notices Izzy’s not quite as obedient anymore (though he still never says ‘no’ to his captain’s orders). He doesn’t like that. He notices Izzy’s been spending more time around Teach and Rackham, decides they’re bad influences (he intends them to captain other ships in his fleet, they’re allowed to push back on orders, Izzy will never have a command of his own, he is not). He separates them. Puts Teach and Rackham on the Marianne with the flimsy excuse of ‘getting practice in’. (he sees them off with Izzy at his side, a claiming hand on his shoulder, Ed and Jack aren't sure how they manage it, but they don't try to kill him right then and there) They now only ever see each other when they all make port. Its a trying few months (for Ed and Jack, for Izzy. . .).

They meet at port one last time (apart, at least). Edward has a plan. They’re going to mutiny. They’ve been stirring the pot on the Marianne (whispers had already started before they got there, not too many of the crew were happy to miss out on loot just because Ol’ Ben had an apparent soft spot for the Crown). He presses his knife into Izzy's hands. Tells him, back on the ship, when everyone else is asleep, he’s to slip into the captain’s cabin and kill Ben, in his sleep, so he can’t order him to stop (Izzy is never sure if he would have said ‘no’ to that unintentional order, had he been able).

The mutiny goes off without a hitch (Ben wakes when the knife plunges into his throat, but he can’t give orders around the steel and the blood that choke him). Edward makes Izzy his first mate, gives Jack the Marianne. He and Izzy go on to create a legend.

Things are good, for a long while they're good. Edward is an inventive and charismatic captain, the crew love him and the loot he leads them to, and Izzy's position (and Edward's possessive protectiveness over him) means that anyone who dares order Israel Hands around, that doesn't have the title of 'his captain', meets a quick end.

Unfortunately, for Izzy, 'good' never tends to last. He'd hoped (and damn him for daring to hope) that he was free, as free as he could be, from his curse, sailing under Edward (Blackbeard), and he was. For a while. Its about a decade later when Edward starts to get bored. He never orders Izzy to do anything degrading or dangerous (more dangerous than he can handle at least) but it still hurts somewhere deep in his chest the first time Edward gives a casual order and doesn't look to see if Izzy wants to follow it.

They come across Jack every now and again. It always takes him a bit to readjust to Izzy, to remember he needs to phrase things as suggestions rather than orders, he always manages eventually. (that little pain in his chest digs a little deeper when he notices Edward avoids giving him orders when Jack is around, though he can't say why) Their crossing paths wind up fewer and farther between as the years go on. One notable visit involved Jack asking Edward to marry him and Anne Bonny ('why not just have your first mate do it?' 'Annie is my first mate, man, 'sides, I want my two best buds to be there for it!'). Izzy isn't sure what to make of Edward's renewed willingness to run into Jack afterwards (only knows that the pain in his chest grows all the sharper for it, and at seeing Jack, happy with Anne, he feels a bit monstrous about that). It doesn't matter much in the end, things go back to normal once Mary/Mark (depending on the day) Read enters the picture and (mostly) steals Annie away from Jack.

And suddenly Izzy finds himself at fifty five, on a beach, wondering ‘what kind of fucking idiot runs his ship aground‘. Edward is intrigued, Izzy can't tell him 'no'.

He hates the Revenge with every fiber of his being. None of the crew listen to him, Edward doesn't back him up (and neither do Fang or Ivan, following their captain's lead). The first time one of the crew gets it into their head to give him a mocking order he nearly passes out with the force it takes him to not jump to the task immediately. He retreats to his cabin later and vomits at the feeling of violation he hasn't felt in decades (he tells himself he hasn't felt it, Edward is his captain, above all else is loyalty to his captain, his own feelings don't matter).

He hates stupid fucking Stede Bonnet most of all. Hates him for putting a light back in Edward's eyes that hasn't been there for a long while. Hates his pompous attitude, his flippant disregard for the institution of piracy, how little he seems to actually care for the safety and well-being of his own men (leave alone the danger he poses to Edward). Most of all he hates that he calls him 'Iggy'.

So when he challenges him to a duel, and he accepts, its only for Edward's sake that he sets the terms at 'banishment' and not 'death'. When he loses he finds he rather wished it had been to the death. (he doesn't understand, Edward wanted this, he hadn't even told him to stop, hadn't ordered him to stop)

He retreats to Spanish Jackie'z to lick his wounds and to work out a plan to pull Edward out of the steady march towards his own demise that he faces aboard the Revenge. Jackie, Izzy is fairly certain, knows about his curse to some extent (he suspects she doesn't abuse the knowledge for the sake of having a bargaining chip, should she need it), she talks him out of any corners the navy bloke with a grudge against Stede Bonnet inadvertently walks him into. She also runs him into Jack Rackham (and Izzy realizes, at the sight of the silver starting to peek its way through his dirty blond, that its been nearly ten years since they've last seen each other, that pain in his chest not any duller for it) and the last piece of the plan falls into place. Jack tries to talk him out of it, says its not a good idea, even offers him a position on his own ship (not that its his ship to offer anymore, since Annie took over captaincy and made Mary/Mark her first mate, but they've both always had a soft spot for Izzy on account of Jack's soft spot for Izzy, they'd be more than willing), not once does he order though and Izzy can't let Edward keep doing this to himself. Jack will understand when he sees him, Izzy says. Jack goes.

(Izzy hears, when the navy gunners crow triumphantly about hitting the dinghy, the one that Jack and Edward were in, the one that Edward jumped out of, he tells himself not to let it show when that pain in his chest comes back twenty-fold at the thought)

Edward claims the Act of Grace. He and Stede Bonnet leave to lick the king’s boots. Izzy doesn't make it a single day as captain. Edward comes back just before he goes overboard with the anchor to follow. He comes back wrong. Izzy can't take it. Edward can't take it.

The Kraken wakes and Izzy is introduced to the concept of a living hell. (even the captive crew stop trying to give him orders, at the haunted look in his eye, when they see how the Kraken orders him around, when he discovers Spriggs alive, if a lot worse for the wear, he doesn't even need the order to keep it under wraps, he doesn't want to know what the Kraken would order him to do if the boy is found out, he shudders at the thought)

When stupid fucking Stede Bonnet (and his marooned crew) finds his way back to the Revenge Izzy allows himself a single moment to feel relieved. Until, at least, the Kraken orders him to kill the man. He can't. He fights. The crew are all shouting at him not to, it eases the strain. The Kraken levels his pistol at his head, the crew goes silent.

'Israel, I order you to kill Stede Bonnet'.

His sword is in his hand. Stede's gotten better with his own sword, is managing to hold his own against Izzy (in truth, its mostly due to Izzy straining to not follow the order, but there is a marked improvement). The Kraken growls 'Kill him Izzy, fucking- kill him!' Izzy loses his sword to the mast again (he's grateful this time), his knife is in his hand a second later. He's got less reach than Stede does but Stede is trying not to hurt him. Why is he trying not to hurt him?

'Bonnet. Bonnet, you have to stop me. I can't. I can't kill you. I can't let him do that to himself. You have to. Run me through. Right here-' he taps his chest with his free hand, the one that isn't swinging the knife around, the left side, right over his heart '-only way to stop this. He might even listen to you afterwards.'

'Izzy. Izzy no.' In his shock, Stede lowers his sword. Izzy swears as he knocks it out of his hand. Presses close, crowds him against the doors to the captain's cabin, knife against his throat.

'Just fucking kill him already!'

A bead of blood wells under the tip of the blade. Izzy meets his own eyes in the polished reflection of his knife.

'Izzy stop fucking around and do what I told you to!'

His hands shake with the weight of the order. There are tears in his eyes, he can see them in his reflection.

A memory comes, unbidden: He, Edward, and Jack hiking through dense jungle to find a witch that Jack thinks might be able to break his curse, or at least tell them how to break it themselves. Her words 'I cannot break this curse Israel, this is something you must do for yourself. I can tell you this, however, to do this you'll need to face yourself. Face yourself and free yourself. That is all I can say, I'm sorry, I'd tell you more if I could.' They'd left disappointed, Jack cursing about scams and 'you can't even trust witches these days, man', Edward contemplatively silent.

Face yourself and free yourself. Izzy's eyes flick upwards to Stede's concerned face, back down to the blade. He meets his own eyes again.

'Izzy-' The rest of the Kraken's words go unheard.

Izzy tells himself, voice scarcely more than a breath: 'You will not be obedient.'

He feels, more than sees, Stede's gasp. He ignores it. His hand still wants to press the knife upwards. He tries again.

'You will not be obedient.' A little louder this time.

'The fuck did you just say-' Again.

'You will not be obedient!'

The knife flies across the deck, lands with a clatter. Silence (but for the sound of Izzy's labored breaths).

He turns, ignores the shocked crew, meets Edward's wide eyes with his own watery ones (when had the tears started falling so freely?).

'. . . Iz. . . ?'

Everything goes black.

[archiveoftragedies]

Ed thinks that Stede will only love him if he's the Edward Teach version of himself, the one who folds laundry and is okay with licking king George's boots. That's why he says "you were always gonna realize what I am" in the Calico Jack episode. He's saying "I'm not this soft, vulnerable, happy version of myself that I'm with you, I'm Blackie, I'm Blackbeard, I'm the Kraken". And he was so afraid of Stede finally realizing that and being horrified and unable to love him anymore, that he leaves first. Only to immediately come back when he realizes Stede is in danger. And in that moment, he gives everything up, he signs everything away. To save Stede he becomes Edward Teach, a version of himself he hadn’t been since he was a child.

Ed is never himself, he doesn't even know who that is, in fact. He's a chameleon, he adopts a different personality depending on who he's with or what he's trying to pretend to be in that moment. This is made obvious in that scene in which they're having breakfast and Calico tells that grim tale of Blackbeard burning that ship with everyone trapped inside, screaming. Stede is taken aback because "I thought you'd given up the killing", because that's what Ed told him in that vulnerable "that's why I have no friends" moment in the bathtub. And he tries to justify it "technically the fire killed those guys, not me". But I'm sure he didn't try to justify himself to Jack when he did it, because that's what he expected of him, although it wasn't what Stede expected.

This scene has such an awkward energy, not just because Stede feels out of place, but because it's one of those moments in which character A has lied to character B and character C is about to reveal it by accident so character A tries to stop them by saying something like "no, Stede doesn't wanna hear about that" to make them stop.

Ed hasn't exactly lied to either of them, but he hasn't told the truth either.

He has killed people, indirectly, but Stede can't know that. He hasn't been able to kill anyone with his own hands since his father, but Jack can't know that. (Izzy does but that's another topic).

The thing, then, is. The real Ed is none of these people. You can see glimpses of him in all, because all of them are a part of him, but all of them are masks. He has needed them to survive. Edward couldn't have survived in Hornigold's ship, so he became someone else. Blackbeard couldn't have survived at the pirate academy, so he became someone else.

What I can say for sure is that he has allowed himself to be a bit truer to himself with Stede than with anyone else (in the show). Not fully himself, he was still trying to cover up his murders, trying to be softer and good enough for Stede. But he allowed him to see him crying, because that's a thing you can do around Stede, yes, but also because he trusted him. With Stede he wasn't Edward, or Blackbeard, he was Ed. And Ed is the name I think he'll end up choosing for himself. But, in the end, he was still trying to be a different version of himself, one that Stede could love. One that didn't have space for the things about Blackbeard and the Kraken that are still very much parts of Ed. All of them have pieces of him, but none of them allows him to just be, they were all carefully curated for other people, not for himself. That's what needs to change.

Now (you know...... in season 2) Stede needs to prove that he loves him, all of him, every version, everything. I've seen people talking about Stede cleaning Ed's makeup, washing the Kraken away, but that's not what I think needs to happen. Stede would love the Kraken, because it's a part of Ed, full stop.

It's Ed who needs to wash his own face. He needs to learn what parts of himself he needs to let go off, and what parts he likes. And learn to love himself, all of him, every version, even the ones that no longer serve him, but especially the ones that do. I don't think either of them could have grown as people alone on a ship to China, as much as it pains me to admit. Stede needed to make peace with his old life and say goodbye, and now Ed needs to face the Kraken.

[blackbeards-snakery]

This is wandering into "reading far too much into it" territory, but I keep thinking about the scene when Jack asks Stede if he and Ed are "buggering each other". There's just so much going on in that scene.

Some thoughts:

-Stede says "I don't know what you're talking about". This seems quite a specific response:

-from a meta perspective, this is yet another reassurance that the show is queer-friendly, a safe space. They could've quite easily made Stede's line something like "don't be gross", but they made it neutral instead.

-from a characterisation perspective, Stede seems comfortable enough with the concept that his reaction is mainly to Jack being the one asking. I think Stede accepts that he likes men, has no problem with it outside the obvious "society doesn't allow it" issue, and he simply hasn't realised that Ed could want him in that way.

-Jack is such a bastard, not only does he take this chance to tell Stede that same-sex love is normal among pirates, but also that it's something Ed, specifically, is open to.

-yes, he's trying to make Stede jealous, but also;

-Jack knows he's about to take Ed away and leave Stede to be caught by the English. He's saying "all this time, you could've had him. It wasn't a remote fantasy, it was a real possibility, and you missed it."

-He's saying "I shagged him and you didn't" right before he takes away the chance of that happening.

-and then Jack goes ahead and marks his territory. Or asserts his dominance.

-which he feels the need to do because he, Jack, is jealous of Stede. Stede is allowed to call Blackbeard Ed.

-Izzy also calls him Ed or Edward.

-The "Ed" thing is an old splinter under Jack's skin.

-My initial instinct back in episode 2, I think, was that Blackbeard and Izzy were a thing. Now I'm sure of it.

-If Jack survived the cannonball, we're going to see a scene between him and Izzy, and one or the other of them is going to switch sides.

Like I said. Probably reading too much into it.