#jade gets distracted while trying to make a set

[thebiggerbear]

"I took care of that asshole for you." "I don't like the sound of that." - Soldier Boy Prompt Response

Summary: When Ben mentions something to you in the middle of battle, your attempt at a little levity turns the conversation in a direction that probably would have been better kept off of Comms during a mission.

Pairing: Soldier Boy x Female!Reader; Soldier Boy x Female!Supe!Reader

A/N: Prompt from @dumplingsjinson. This came out of nowhere, I have no idea what it is, and yes, I did pick on Hughie a little bit. After Season 3, he deserved it a little. 😜

Unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine.

Warnings: Soldier Boy being Soldier Boy; explicit mentions of violence/blood/gore; mentions of death & dead bodies; explicit language; a smidgen of dirty talk; implications

Word Count: 2132

Taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187; @rieleatiel

SB Taglist: @deans-spinster-witch; @birdiellie; @heartlessdelusions; @nancymcl; @brightlilith; @muhahaha303; @just-levyy

Jensen Taglist: @samanddeaninatrenchcoat

"I took care of that asshole for you." "I don't like the sound of that."

“You got six more on their way up to you,” you warned Ben before dodging and knocking out the three security guards you were currently battling. You could hear reinforcements thundering up the stairs to your op partner.

“Good,” Ben grunted in your earpiece. “Now we’re in for a good fucking time.” You heard the brute force of his strength impacting human flesh from the sounds of loud blows and sickening crunches echoing in your eardrum. You rolled your eyes at Ben’s comment and held your breath as you popped out of the area you were in and appeared next to him on the fifty fourth floor. You immediately joined the fray.

“There you are, doll. Here to join the party?” Ben gave you a smirk as he knocked several men across the room with his shield.

“I wouldn’t call this a party.” You lifted your arm in his direction and a small beam shot out, killing the man who had been approaching behind him with a gun. “But yeah, I’m here. Let’s do this and get it done.”

Ben turned to see the dead man fall in a crumpled heap and then smirked even wider at you. “Lead the way, dollface.”

You did just that, busting into the stairwell and racing up the stairs. Ben was right behind you. 

You both encountered rashes of security response teams in between floors that you worked together to take out. You heard a gun click behind you but before you could react, Ben knocked the weapon from the man’s hand and then bashed his head against the concrete wall, leaving behind a very big stain of blood and brain matter. 

Ben turned to you, his green eyes stormy and dark. You knew that look by now even if you hadn’t just seen what you did; it usually preceded a murderous rage Soldier Boy would go into if anyone was stupid enough to really piss him off. And that didn’t even begin to touch what would set off the nuke inside his chest.

“I took care of that asshole for you.” He inclined his head in the dead man’s direction.

You screwed up your face in mock disgust. “Yeah, I don’t like the sound of that.”

The jade storm you were staring at lightened slightly and a very dirty smirk adorned his face instead. “One of these nights, you’re going to take me up on that offer, doll.”

You snorted and used your forearm to wipe some blood off of your face. Great. Now he’d never stop trying to talk you into it. “That ass belongs to me and you know it,” he’d always tease, wearing that same filthy grin, before you’d tell him that wasn’t happening and proceeded to distract him in other ways. 

“Uh, if you two are done doing whatever kind of gross and perverted flirting this is, you’re about to have another welcome party in the next forty five seconds,” Hughie spoke in your ear, sounding uncomfortable and thoroughly repulsed.

“Sounds like something you told Butcher while licking his balls before he turned that tight ass of yours into the Lincoln Tunnel,” Ben fired back.

“What are you talking about? That doesn’t even make sense, you ass.”

You shook your head in disgust at the exchange, not really listening to Hughie’s predictable and offended response, and you were about to head up the stairs when Ben’s hand grasped your shoulder and turned you around. He leaned in, murmuring into your free ear, “I forgot we were on comms.” You knew that was his roundabout way of apologizing. “I meant what I said, doll. Think about it. For now, I just can’t wait to get this shit over with and be back in that sweet pussy of yours, right where I belong.” Normally, that would disgust you rather than turn you on, but Ben always had a way of painting a picture with the dirtiest fucking words that somehow had you aching for it to become a reality. So much so that everyone and everything else would cease to exist in your world temporarily until it was indeed made a reality. Mallory put you two together because you would be the strongest team to be able to go up against Homelander and Vought. She never expected that you two would become more than partners on ops. You couldn’t begin to count the amount of times you’d popped yourself and Ben out of an op to get busy elsewhere once you were distracted, and she’d had to warn you both that if you didn’t cooperate, the deal would be off the table. To which Ben would then push you back onto said table, or desk, or whatever flat surface in the room, forcing her to roll her eyes and exit the room, leaving you both to demolish the place in a frenzy until you both were popped out of there by your own self.  

Hearing your heartbeat pick up in response to his statement, Ben gripped your cheeks with his bloody fingerless gloves, rubbing a thumb tenderly over your bottom lip. You could feel the wetness he left behind and you should be grossed out, but then his lips were suddenly on yours and as so often happened when that occurred, your head got a little fuzzy and your brain turned off. You shoved him into the concrete wall, causing a loud cracking sound, but neither of you cared to look. Instead, you had jumped up into his arms and began grinding against him as you dug your teeth into his lip and pulled, making him chuckle into your mouth. 

You were then pushed up against the wall, your hands held above your head in one of his, causing another cracking sound. The darkness in his gaze was back, but this time for a whole other reason. He covered your mouth with his and you couldn’t help but moan, twitching against his hold that only seemed to tighten. His other hand disappeared in between you, working at the fastenings of his suit. If he would just let your hands free, you could help him with that and have it done much faster.

“Guys! Guys! GUYS! HEY!” Hughie yelled into your earpieces. You both broke apart, wincing at the sudden pain in your ear drums. 

“Fuck!” Ben yelled as you grit your teeth. Ben had released you and both of you held your hands to your ears. 

“Welcome party in twenty seconds! Focus!”

Ben recovered first. “I’m going to fucking rip your spine out when I get back there, you snivelling little shit!” 

Hughie’s audible gulp was heard on the line.

You were still waiting for the reverberations in your ears to stop. “Shit,” you whimpered. Okay, yeah, you both had gotten a little carried away just like you usually tended to do and you needed to focus on the mission at hand, but damn. Had that really been necessary? The amount of pain in your ears confirmed that no, it fucking hadn’t.

Ben gripped your chin and forced you to meet his eyes. The fire that had been there before cooled slightly but it still burned brightly. “We’ll finish this later,” he promised in a quiet murmur, giving your hearing a moment to recuperate which you really appreciated. He even tenderly stroked the skin in front of your ears. “Better?” He asked after a few seconds had passed.

You nodded, still wincing slightly as you held one hand to your right ear. “Yeah. Thanks.” He gently placed you down on your feet and you took an uneasy step forward, him catching you before you could fall. While you and Ben both had super hearing, yours was a little extra — a very fucked up side effect of the Compound V in your system. So someone yelling in the same room as you was harsh on your eardrums and made you want to claw at your head. Someone yelling in your ear was pure fucking torture and literally rocked your world. Which was why now your equilibrium was temporarily fucked.

“Hughie,” you hissed. “If you ever do anything like that again, I’m going to rip your dick off and shove it so far down your throat, you’ll shit it back out. Which, from what I hear, should be an easy feat considering you’re used to having one up your ass. Do you understand me?”

Another audible gulp was heard down the line. “S-Sorry. It’s just, you guys are in the middle of the mission and you’re about to—”

“Hughie,” you snarled.

“Yes, ma’am.”

A proud smile graced Ben’s face as he helped you back to your feet but you were in no mood to smile back. You held a hand to your head, feeling a headache coming on thanks to what just happened. You then felt Ben’s lips at your temple. “You sure you’re okay?”

These fleeting moments of tenderness that Ben would show you still always managed to surprise you. But it was also one of the reasons you had let him into your bed and your heart (though he didn’t know about that last part yet and probably wouldn’t for some time if you had your way). You could take or leave Soldier Boy 99.9% of the time, but Ben — Ben you stayed for. 

“Yeah,” you whispered, laying your head down on his shoulder and closing your eyes for a moment. You felt his hand rubbing your back and you relaxed at the heat you felt through the fabric of your suit. 

“Guys,” Hughie interrupted more softly this time. “Sorry to break this up but you’ve got ten seconds until the next welcome wagon shows up.”

Your eyes snapped open and you lifted your head. “Exactly why are we doing all of the heavy lifting on this one again?”

Ben chuckled as he pressed a kiss above your right ear and then moved to pick up his shield from where he’d dropped it when you pushed him before.     

“We need to get a sample of the newest batch of V that Vought is cooking up so we know if—”

“Yeah, yeah,” you interrupted Hughie. “I remember. You just make sure Mallory remembers that after this, Ben and I are on an extended vacation.” Ben gave you an approving smirk.

“Ah, okay.”

“I mean it, Hughie. Or I’ll be popping into places you and everyone else do not even want to fucking imagine. Termite will look like the shitty little prequel that couldn’t, compared to what I can do.” And you would make good on your threat, too. You and Ben deserved a break. They’d had you doing shit like this for nearly four months now. This was the most dangerous op yet but they’d perfectly timed it when Homelander and his group of Subpar Supes (as you called them) would be on a government-sanctioned mission out of the country. That didn’t mean that Homelander couldn’t get back here immediately if he was notified of a security breach in the Tower. Especially if he knew Soldier Boy was involved. 

You heard another door slam open two flights above you and you let out a tired sigh. You only had a few more levels to go until you reached the Labs. And thanks to Supe stamina, you didn’t tire easily so a couple of more caches of guards that Vought could pull out of its large steel ass were nothing. But damn if you didn’t want this op to be over with already and you and Ben were on a tropical beach somewhere that you had popped both of you to. 

The footsteps thundered down the stairs as the guards rushed to engage you and you glanced over towards Ben. His smirk grew as he tensed and got ready for battle. “Come on, doll. Let’s have a little more fun before we blow the joint.”

You huffed out a laugh and got ready yourself, your hands beginning to glow as you held them out in front of you. “There you go with your words again,” you teased.

He appeared next to you, holding up his shield in front of you both. “The only one you’re going to be blowing tonight, doll, is me.”

You rolled your eyes at his ridiculous joke but before you could respond, you heard in your ear, “Gross.” You couldn’t help but snicker along with Ben right before the guards attacked. Well, that’s what the little shit got for nearly cracking your eardrums before. He was just lucky that you hadn’t popped over to him, backhanded him to cause him the same amount of pain he had caused you, and popped back to Vought. As for Ben, well…you were going to make damn sure he kept his promise to you, on all counts.  

A/N: 🤷‍♀️

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[navybrat817]

A Sunny Outlook

Pairing: Tattoo Artist!Andy Barber x Female Reader Summary: After everything Andy has been through, his outlook on life is a bit jaded. Until you show up. Word Count: Almost 1.3k Warnings: Defending Jacob spoilers/Mix of canon and canon divergent (talk of divorce, child death), slight angst, opposites attract, future smut and feels (it's me), Andy Barber (he's a warning, okay?). A/N: Tenth and final day of my Naughty & Nice Nonsense belongs to new couple, Grumpy and Sunny! Set in the same AU as Hottie and Sugar, I mixed up my list a bit and plan to share Thorn and Rose at a later date. ❤️ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Banner and moodboard by yours truly. Andy edit by the beautiful @randomagnes0210. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

If you would’ve told Andy Barber years ago that he’d be living his life today as a tattoo artist, he wouldn’t have believed you. He had his path carved out. Life didn’t care what people wanted though, no matter how hard they worked to get it.

“Um, Mr. Barber?” Jake called out to him from the desk.

"How many times have I told you to call me 'Andy'? For fuck's sake," Andy snapped.

"Sorry, Mr. Bar- Andy!"

Andy took a deep breath in and slowly exhaled. He didn't mean to snap at Jake. He was a good guy. One of the nicest around. It wasn't his fault he was in a bad mood.

Which was his mood most days.

"No, I'm sorry," he said.

He wasn’t always a jaded man. Though his dad had been in jail his entire life, he thankfully had a good childhood overall. It helped set him on his path to become a lawyer, as he wanted to help others. He also made a promise to himself to be a good father if that day would ever come. He thought he had that chance to make that dream a reality with his college sweetheart, Laurie.

As a lawyer, he enjoyed his work. It challenged him and helped him grow. It was also stressful depending on the case. Long hours and seeing some people at their worst didn’t always leave him in the best headspace. But he had his wife and they had their son, Jacob.

Life was good.

Until his world got a little darker.

“This isn’t working, Laurie.”

“No, it isn’t."

Andy couldn’t put his finger on why and he wasn’t sure if it was good or bad that Laurie was on the same page. Love took a lot of work and sometimes it wasn’t enough to make a marriage last. Not that they didn’t give it a try. They met with a counselor. Neither of them stepped out on each other. They wanted desperately to make it work for their kid.

But the loss of their son solidified the end of their marriage.

“Andy, I know you blame me.”

The thing is Andy didn’t put that on her. It was the bad weather that caused her to spin out of control. But she carried guilt for fighting with their son before the crash. It was something she couldn’t let go of.

The divorce was as ammicable as it could be, but it didn’t stop him from feeling like a failure. Work couldn’t distract him either. How was he expected to help people, some who were not even innocent, when he couldn’t help himself?

Tears filled his eyes as he sat in his empty house, trying to figure out what the hell was he supposed to do with his life. He didn’t want to go back into the office. He also didn’t want to drink himself to death. In a drunken stupor he called an old friend of his.

Steve Rogers.

One of the most honorable men Andy had the pleasure of knowing. While he went off to law school, Steve joined the army. The last he heard, he became a tattoo artist with another friend and army buddy, Bucky Barnes. He felt like an ass calling when he hadn’t reached out in so long, but the inebriated part of his brain didn’t process that.

“I don’t know what to do,” was all he said on the voicemail.

He woke up the next morning with a text message from Steve: “You any good at drawing?”

It was the beginning of his new chapter.

"You are never gonna get laid if you keep snapping at everyone," Hal winked as he walked by his chair.

"Get fucked," he said with only a hint of malice as Hal chuckled.

"I'm tryin'!"

"Give him a break," Steve said from his station, but he was smiling, too.

Like Jake, it was hard to get mad at a guy like Hal. A charming piercer who drifted from place to place before he met up with Steve and Bucky, he did some of the best work in the city. He was sure some came into the new shop just to hit on him.

"What is it, Jake?" he asked as he stood up and stretched.

"Your consultation is here about the sun tattoo," he explained, pushing his glasses further up on his nose. "Said she saw some of your work online."

Andy took another breath. He prided himself on the portfolio he built. It took him time to build and he didn't have as much clientele as Steve and Bucky, but he was slowly catching up. He was proud of the work he accomplished.

"Yeah, send her over," he said. He had a few minutes before his next appointment. "Thanks."

Jake rushed off before he could say another word, likely afraid he'd snap again. He'd have to apologize again later. He should've been happy. The opening of the shop went well. He liked his place in the city.

What the hell was his problem?

"Hi!"

Andy blinked when you stood in front of him. He wasn't used to seeing such a cheerful smile on someone’s face. Not directed at him, at least. He would've thought it was fake if not for the kindness in your eyes.

Ironic that you wanted a sun tattoo since he saw the world as much darker a long time ago.

Would the sun still shine in your eyes if I had you spread out under me?

Where the fuck did that thought come from?

He didn't lust after potential clients. He hadn't even done one night stand after Laurie. Why did seeing your happy, beautiful face make him want to change his mind?

Why did your smile get to him?

"Um, I can come back another time," you offered, as if you inconvenienced him by walking over.

The mere presence of you rendered Andy speechless until he remembered he had to speak.

"No, it's okay. Please, have a seat," he stood up to pull a chair over. "I'm Andy."

Your smile was back on your face as you gave him your name.

Beautiful, just like you.

"I just want to say real quick that I love your work,” you said as you took out your phone. “I can’t believe I was lucky enough to get in so quickly.”

"I appreciate that,” he said. The compliment meant a lot. “It’s a sun tattoo you want, right?"

“Yeah. My friends call me Sunny because I’m what they call a ‘big ball of sunshine’,” you explained.

“I can’t imagine why,” he deadpanned. You looked like you were trying to hold in a laugh as you set your phone down. “Something funny?”

“Do people tell you that you’re grumpy?” you asked curiously. "Or is it a requirement that at least half of the staff here have to look intimidating?"

His eyebrows shot up in surprise, but he wasn’t the least bit offended. “People tell me almost every day."

“I can’t imagine why,” you echoed with a smile.

"And if only half of us look intimidating, then we aren't doing our job."

“Don't worry. I won't tell," you mock whispered.

He actually smiled back at you before he frowned and cleared his throat. He refused to let you consume his thoughts, even if your bright aura began to chip away at his tough exterior. “Then why don’t you tell me more about your tattoo.”

He listened intently as you explained the kind of sun design you wanted and where. He had a feeling by the time he finished your consultation, he'd be in a much better mood. Even if he didn’t want to be. And your tattoo would be his best work yet.

Andy's world may be a bit brighter thanks to you. ❤️ Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Andy Barber Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[pommunist]

i honestly think that the qsmp is experiencing a quiet and slow death. like qsmp related stuff barely comes across my dash anymore (and i follow hundreds of mcyt blogs, back when things actually happened my entire dash would just be qsmp fanwork and liveblogging).

like sure the server is still open (not that i think it should be) but i barely see anyone talking about it anymore. the most i see is announcements for some new event thats supposed to revive the server and then i maybe see 3 or 4 posts about it the day of?

theres also way less new fanart being posted, the majority of the fanart i see is either a) shipping art that isnt set in any specific time (or is set during the peak ship era), b) art about one of the old events/plotlines, or c) pure egg art also with no specific time setting. there is relatively no fanart that is solely about the new events.

they keep trying to wave events in front of the jaded fans like "hey!!! new event! you want more events yeah? you guys used to love events :(" as if we dont see it as the distraction from their workplace abuse that it is

tbh i hate to see it happen but it’s what you get when you mix mistreatment of your workers with terrible pr management like….

first you have everyone who stopped supporting it when they learnt of the admin’s working conditions. already by this point, and because it’s been two months and no signs of betterment a big chunk of the fandom has dropped qsmp.

then you also lose people who were really attached to the eggs, especially if their favorite hasn’t came back or won’t come back at all.

and then you also lose people who were in for story and lore because they just learned that everything they had theorised about for months was for nothing because while the writers were trying their best the higher ups had no idea where the plot was going + ccs couldn’t be involved in the big storyline

and even if all of that wasn’t enough to make you leave, you might just drop it because your cc doesn’t log on anymore, or because the fandom is dying/dead (especially if you speak a language that massively left the project)

😀👍 just saw the tweet announcing the tzc murder mystery event and im so bitter i’ve waited like 9 months for it to happen but to see it happen in these conditions…. maybe the real murders that took place was the self sabotaging of qsmp and all these massacred workers rights

tldr qstudios completely fumbled the bag and that’s on them 100% L+ratio or whatever but it still sucks to see the state of qsmp rn

[yuurei20]

Jade and Floyd Info Compilation part 10: Azul (pt1)

Floyd says that while he, Jade and Azul have been classmates since elementary school he wouldn’t describe them as childhood friends because he barely knew Azul existed until just before they started middle school.

The drama of Book 3 revolves around Azul trying to get a photo from an elementary school field trip removed from a Coral Sea museum, but Floyd says he likes the old Azul because “he’d make a better meal than the one we’ve got now.”

It seems both twins have been to the restaurant run by Azul’s family, but Floyd says that the only thing he remembers is that Azul hated it.

In Book 3 we learn that the twins have signed an NDA covering Azul’s past, which is possibly why Jade refuses to tell Vil how it is that they and Azul met. When asked, he says, “I haven’t the foggiest idea. It’s completely slipped my mind.” Vil is incredulous.

Jade and Floyd both encourage Azul to change into his mer-form at the end of Book 3, with Jade saying that “No one would see the cute chubby little merman in the picture and connect that it’s you,” and Floyd asking why he limits himself to two legs when he can have eight.

In Harveston Jade tries a spiced stew and reflects on how Azul could probably identify all its ingredients if he were there.

Jade says that Azul is “as hardworking as it gets” and will do anything to achieve his goals. “It’s an easily misunderstood temperament, you see.”

Jade encourages Grim to have faith in Azul in Book 4.

Jade and Azul work well together, ganging up on Jamil on the subject of introducing a new dish to Mostro Lounge (despite Jamil’s protests) and managing to convince Idia to keep the Ignihyde Halloween display running (because they have produced a pamphlet that the are selling to visitors, which features Ignihyde’s projection mapping set up).

They also come together to tease Riddle during Spectral Soiree about a surprisingly impassioned speech concerning Azul, and Jade steps in to distract Cater, who threatens to interrupt Azul’s efforts to influence Kalim during Vargas Camp 2.

During the drama of the camp, Jade recommends that he and Azul escape the Vargas Monster by hiding in the lake, offering no solution for Vil and Trey.

When Azul tries to leverage his supply of magestones to help Vil and Trey fight the monster, Jade assures them that Azul is aware that it is an emergency. “I’m sure the terms will be more than favorable. Isn’t that right, Azul?”

When Vil insists on working at Mostro Lounge for only two days rather than the five days that Azul is asking, Jade interjects with the idea that, if they are to compromise to suit Vil’s schedule, they will require exclusive sales rights to his homemade smoothies.

Both Azul and Vil agree with Jade’s compromise.

Sometimes Jade will keep Azul from derailing conversations, such as when they first hear about Kalim’s “absurdly marketable” unique magic and when Azul tries to turn a conversation about the Coral Sea into a tourism opportunity.

Floyd tells Ortho about a time that he hydro-dipped Azul’s hat.

Azul was less than pleased and returned his hat to its usual appearance without ever trying it on, but Floyd is undeterred and says that the next time he comes up with an interesting idea, he will be testing it out on Azul.

We see him attempt just that in the Port Fest event when, after enjoying the form of performance taught to them by Jack, Floyd immediately invites Azul to join them the next time. (Azul is reluctant but Jade follows with, “We’re in,” to Azul’s displeasure.)

Floyd says he finds it hilarious how Azul will go around “like some kinda shark in guppy’s clothing” when important visitors are on campus for ceremonies.

Floyd also has a voice line about giving a stone that he made in alchemy class to Azul that he assumes was worth “a ton of thaumarks,” because Azul was seriously happy to receive it.

[ryuichirou]

treyxidia headcanons? :eyes:

Dear Anon, I am very sorry for making you wait. I’m trying to get through the older asks… and today is your turn!

I am very glad you asked about these two. This is such a sudden ship for us, and all Trey needed to do was to try to force Idia to chat with him a couple of times lol They are so worth exploring, and as I write them I really want to draw them again god damn it.

As always, starting with pretty much me reflecting on their relationship and ending on a spicier note lol

Trey is a bit bummed out that Idia didn’t end up joining the Science club. Whenever things get too noisy during the club activities, he remembers that Idia wanted to join initially and thinks that he would actually really enjoy having another introvert around (not that there are no introverts in the Science club, but sometimes Rook’s singing is very distracting). Not to mention Idia’s inventive mind and cool ideas… it would be fun to have him around.

In general, Trey has a soft spot for Idia, maybe because he sees how difficult it is for him to communicate with others and has this urge to help him out of his shell, or maybe he is just intrigued by him and drawn to him because of other reasons. His teeth is absolutely one of them lol

Idia is legitimately wary of Trey. He feels certain darkness coming from him and he can’t explain it. In a way, Idia thinks that Trey is shadier than even Jade sometimes… not more dangerous, but shadier – it’s easier to see the coldness in Jade’s eyes than in Trey’s, and yet there is something very uneasy about him. And if you compare Trey to people like Rook, Kalim or Cater, who just want to talk to everyone, Trey’s motivation is unknown to Idia. What do you want from him, Trey-shi? Why are you trying to start a conversation?

Both of them encounter their own kind of wall when interacting. Idia is very used of irritating people with his snarky comments, but Trey doesn’t really react to those – he just laughs it off even if Idia’s words visibly rub him the wrong way. And Trey’s main way of flirting interacting with others is baking stuff for them, and Idia is very rarely physically present, so he can’t feed him…

But that doesn’t mean that Trey will stop trying to feed Idia!! Especially since he learnt that Idia has a sweet tooth. So at some point he’ll start bringing sweets to every housewarden/vice-housewarden meeting, feeding everyone and saying that it’s a shame that Idia is never around to try these for himself. He is really out there trying to lure Idia out of his room with food lol

Trey is going to try to bake Idia something from his favourite anime or game one day. He’ll learn what his favourite one is from Ortho – he absolutely wouldn’t mind telling Trey if it means that they’re going to prepare such a fun surprise for Idia. And Idia indeed would be very impressed… Are you trying to make him fall for you, Trey-shi? What is this all about, it’s kind of creepy… it’s a trap… but such a pretty and delicious one.

If they end up kissing at some point, this is going to be such a long kiss. Idia will get overwhelmed by how good of a kisser Trey is (in addition to being shook by the fact that they are indeed kissing for some reason), and Trey is going to take his sweet time outlining every single tooth in Idia’s mouth with his tongue. And this is going to turn him on much more than it should… but then again, Idia wouldn’t expect to get turned by just one kiss either.

Since Trey is actually much naughtier than people expect, he would start thinking about getting a blowjob from Idia very early-on, even before the kiss. But he would just ignore these thoughts (naturally) at first, but… since they don’t leave him alone… once he and Idia find themselves in a sexual setting, he’ll start dreaming about it every single night. Of course, Idia’s teeth are dangerously sharp, but the danger of it just adds more thrill and arousal.

While Trey doesn’t really react whenever Idia tries to snark at him or even straight-up insult him, in a way it reflects on the way Trey treats Idia when they have sex. Trey’s go-to is usually to be very gentle with his partner not to scare him away, but he kind of allows himself to be a little mean to Idia sometimes. Once he notices that Idia kind of likes this treatment, he’ll feel enabled to continue to grab him roughly, overstimulate him and even tug on his hair every once in a while. Even if he feels guilty and awkward about it afterwards…

Idia is always so focused on Trey being this shady that he completely forgets about the fact that Trey is also well-built physically and kind of strong. When Trey undressed for the first time, Idia yelped, being both surprised and flustered. And when Trey touched him, it felt much more rough than he expected, but… His body feels very good afterwards… as if Trey just brutally massaged him all over…

[mightbesmall]

No, Bad Pets!

Genre: Fluff, Crack.

Characters: Most students.

Warnings: Swearing, weird creature flirting.

Summary: You… turned into a pet?

Additional Notes: Based on this post by twst-drabbles on Tumblr, love their house pet au, janitor au and- their work in general tbh.  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The most angriest, low but somehow high at the same time, chirps were heard. Crowley was sweating buckets at this tiny creature that could fit in one hand. It was trying to look intimidating and it achieved that, Mr Crowley was shaking in his ridiculously expensive boots.

This small, angry creature is you. 

You see, you were chasing down some entitled prick who drive his motorbike riiight next to your house despite the obvious signs and spooked Azul and the Tweels'. You quickly calmed them down, placed them in wet towels for extra comfort and went outside. The jerk was looping back 'round the neighbourhood so you took your chance. Which leads to a few moments ago, you cornered and scolded the biker whilst pointing to the big, bold and blaring signs that clearly say "NO VEHICLES." He saw a Crowley storming out of his mansion so as a distraction of sorts, the asshole NPC blasted a spell right at your face. It was as if time stopped, Crowley certainly did.

A puff of smoke appeared as the biker scattered off somewhere, the oldies will certainly deal with him.

"Caretaker?" Crowley called out as the smoke cleared, where you stood was... nothing. "Huh?" The scattered brained male looked left, then right before down when he heard a piercing chirp that somewhat sounded like you somehow. 

"Great Sevens!" He cried as in place of you was a small, cute harpy... or a siren? He cannot really tell. You actually bore a lot of resemblance to the caladrius with your snow white feathers and comforting aura, despite the threatening chirps and squawks.

Anyways you were tiny yet you have already bitten Crowley thrice, he is now bleeding a tad. He just wanted to bring you to your house and figure it out from there but you were making it quite difficult!

...

He bribed you with food. As soon as he even uttered the first few syllables of your favourite food, you were chilling on his shoulder as docile as a mouse, apart from that squawk that he just knew was you telling him to hurry up. 

He barely got through your front door before a certain siren swooped in and snatched you off of his shoulders. He quickly followed you two to the front room where what Crowley can only describe as a council meeting was happening. All the pets were in the same room, how rare. Even the tweels' were on their little skateboards while Azul was perched on your coffee table. Spray bottles at the ready. 

Vil gently placed you down before setting beside you. Crowley took a seat on the chair. 

You chirped rather harshly at Floyd who was starting to glide towards you. He shrunk back in surprise before giving a toothy little grin. Jade chirped in a way that sounded like laughter.

Vil cooed at you, lightly brushing his wings against your rather pretty ones. You were rather beautiful for a harpy, though once upon a time they were known as elegant and refined creatures, not as much as sirens though but you get the idea.

Ace marched up to you with Deuce trailing behind him. They couldn't get that close before Vil squawked at them before resuming grooming you. Huh. It felt quite nice, you almost became putty in his talons. 

Ace huffed defiantly, stomping his foot before Cater dragged him back a bit. Deuce took some rather hesitant steps towards you, not wanting to disrupt Vil's hard work. He then plopped in front of you, with some soft chirps. What a sweetheart, keeping his voice low as to not hurt your most definitely sensitive hearing. He can relate, a new body isn't fun to your senses. 

Trey has a similar approach, he even offered you a seed. How... intimate. It's a clover seed and all. 

And so 36 minutes passed with Vil combing through your new feathers, highlighting your beauty and chatting with the others. Mainly Trey, Deuce, Jack and Epel. Vil wouldn't allow anyone else close. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were flattered but Riddle had to stop. You do not want to hang out in his rose, you made yourself a pretty nice nest on your bed thank you very much. You chirped at him, it came out like a little coo, and gently rejected his offer. 

He wilted, very much pouty. But with his prideful nature, he stopped insisting and instead gave a little nod. You sighed as best you could with your tiny lungs and flapped your wings twice before you took off. You gently picked Riddle up, being mindful of your claws, and flew him to your room. Not caring for the way he shrieked and gripped your legs.

You hope he enjoyed your nest, it was mighty comfortable and you didn't want to share. Just this once though.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Another sandstorm, caused by a certain spirit. Leona was flying overhead displaying a beautiful masterpiece of his hard work. It was a rare sight to behold, oh and the art as well. 

When he was finished, the sand art dropped to the floor gracefully, showcasing its beauty. He then turned to you with a proud chuff, waiting for praise. You raised a brow at him before giving a small, drawled coo of approval. Bad idea, he practically inflated from the ego boost. 

You rolled your eyes at him, little attention seeker.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were starting to see a pattern here.

Azul was trying to drag you to his cave. You can’t quite breathe in the water and he seems to forget that. As of right now Azul only succeeded in having you dip a claw in the tank. You chirped at him.

He understood now. He huffed and pouted in annoyance, even more so when Jade and Floyd started to laugh and cackle at him. He then took off to his cave before swimming back and produced a shiny golden coin to you. He seemed rather proud of himself when you inspected it. You didn’t take it though, instead you rolled your eyes before giving him a forehead kiss. Oh how he loved affection.

The tweels’ started to chirp in jealousy so you quickly took off before they could try nipping at you. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jamil was cuddling up to you, you were wrapped in his tail. You couldn’t fly away, not that you would anyways. Affection from Jamil wasn’t that common. He had you in a secure grip, though it doesn’t hurt. 

You gave a tired coo that the naga replied with a soft hiss. He was making sure you fell asleep here. In his bed. Wrapped up in his tail and his arms. You would’ve found it amusing if you weren’t just so tired, Kalim came over and was all over you. 

You swear you would’ve exploded from him trying to feed you crackers if it weren’t for Silver stepping in. God bless his beautiful soul.

Your eyes were starting to droop when you felt Jamil hiss. The little plant nymphs were back and trying to nab you from his clutches. Unfortunately you don’t exactly trust Ace to be careful with your feathers and you didn’t want Cater or Riddle to fuss over you so as soon as Jamil’s grip lessened, you flew up in a flurry of feathers. Off to your bed you go. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was nice. Vil was behaving like normal, performing his elegant dances to you like usual but you couldn’t help but have an inkling feeling that he was putting extra effort in this one.

What a minute…

You gave him a dead eyed stare. He paid no mind and continued on with his prancing and display of his tail feathers. He then finished and was about to fly off when you gave a chirp. It was one that read, I am fed up with this bullshit. Vil was quite offended, thinking you disliked his dance, so he turned to you only for you to give another chirp.

 Oh.

So the others tried their hand at trying to seduce you as well, no matter. Vil is confident that he will be the best suitor, you two are similar in species and he is of course the most beautiful. 

You huffed before lightly whacking him with your wing and flew off, on your way to bother Crowley. It was feeding time for everyone after all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What a pretty sight.

The display of rainbow lights reflected quite well off of your white feathers, enhancing your curious but adorable situation. 

Idia was giving it his all, choosing the most vibrant colours, making sure to dazzle you. He made sure to really give his all when it was your favourite colour, illuminating the pond with the vibrant and wonderful colour.

Not too bright to flash bang you but bright enough to light the whole place up.

You just sat there, admiring the pretty colours as one does before patting Ortho on the head. He was snuggled up next to you. Idia should be mad that someone stole your attention away from him but it was Ortho so he’ll allow it. 

He turned to you, waiting. You gave a little hum before curling up with Ortho, who had found his way on your lap and is now enjoying you wrapping your wings around him. You were like a big blanket, very comfy.

Idia deflated a little at the lack of attention but it was Ortho… he soon joined you two as well. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You let out an undignified squawk. Malleus, the little devil, just picked you up out of your nest and flew off. He was taking you to his nest. While you have admitted to it looking comfortable, you’d much rather be in your own nest. You were in the middle of napping as well.

He plopped you down before sitting next you, clearly pleased with himself if his smile was anything to go by. 

You rolled your eyes before averting them to Sebek who was at the base of the tree. Conflicted. He doesn’t know if he should start yelling at you for being in the same nest as Malleus or leave you be because you are in the same nest as Malleus. You just raised a brow at him.

Lilia flew over before plopping down on a close branch, making it his duty to mess up your newly groomed tail feathers. You whacked him in the face, chirping at him when he started to laugh and mess up you wings.

Malleus meanwhile was just watching it all unfold, very much amused. He blew a small puff of fire in front of you, finding pleasure in the way you didn’t even flinch but instead gave him a narrowed eye stare. You weren’t mad but more so questioning as to why? He just gave a smile in response, covering your wings with his own.

Little shit. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were finally alone, Ace thought as he snuck into your room only to receive the jumpscare of his life when he saw Cater, Deuce and Trey dog piled on top of you. Cater turned to him before giving a shit eating grin, relishing in the way you patted his head. 

Deuce and Trey also turned to him. The little lily nymph giving him a deadpanned stare before sticking his tongue out and went back to napping on you. Trey however gave Ace an ominous look before slowly shaking his head and turned away. Ace rolled his eyes, these guys can’t keep you to themselves, he wants attention too!

It then dawned on him that someone needs to attend to Riddle and the garden still. He gave the three a heated glare before giving you his best puppy eyes, he’s seen them work for others so he might as well try. You were not impressed and just, laid there. It was then that Ace knew he can’t get out of this. 

So begrudgingly, he sulked back outside. Next time he swears! 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He snuck back into your room, the other nymphs are busy so he can have all your attention on him. 

He entered your room only to be severely annoyed. There was Ruggie and Jack, napping away with you lightly scratching their scalps. 

Ruggie opened his eyes before nudging Jack, both of them staring at the nymph at the doorway. You also looked up, not looking impressed in the slightest. 

He huffed before storming out, he couldn’t push his way into the napping circle as Ruggie will get him back and Jack honestly kinda scares him. He fears you most though, doesn’t want you to be mad at him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He swears he’s going to start hitting something.

Ace once again invaded your room only to find you missing, he searched high and low before sneaking his way into the only place he hasn’t checked: the Octavinelle tank. Low and behold, you were sitting at the edge of the tank with Jade and Floyd squeezing you. Not to hard but just enough to restrict any movement. 

He didn’t even bother to linger, those two scared him shitless. 

Next time for real this time. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Never has he felt the immense urge to beat a human since he first met you. Kalim wasn’t even in the garden this time!

The rich boy was pampering you in love and care, it was heartwarming to see but dammit when will he get a turn?!

You were just sitting there, waiting for Kalim to finish to probably nap. He was presenting tiny clothing for you, an assortment of wondrous food and sparkling jewellery. You know just rich kid things. 

Ace sighed in defeat and wandered off, ready for his next attempt. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And once again he was beaten. By a dryad and a creepy Frenchman no less. You were sitting on Rooks lap, combing your taloned hands through Epel’s hair, a bit like how Vil would. The fancy lad you were using as a chair was almost vibrating in excitement, gushing about how he’s never seen such a beautiful and exquis harpy before! He tried brushing his fingers along your wings but you bit him, he only chuckled at that before fanboying about such a display of strength and power, making you look oh so féroce!

The dryad was humming in content, he would hate for anyone to touch his hair to make him look cute or whatever but it feels real nice when it’s you. His little branches were swaying lightly in content. How precious.

The forgotten nymph only sighed deeply before turning and walking away, missing Epel’s teasing smirk. 

He is going to cry. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He walked into another cuddle pile, didn’t even need to invade your room to find you. 

You, Silver, Sebek and Lilia were all having a nice nap on the sofa in the front room. Sebek was even curled up into you.

It was unfortunately so heartwarming, Ace had to step out in defeat lest he puke from how fluffy it is in there. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ace will commit mass murder.

You were even cuddling with the weird cat before him! The weirdo was even purring as you laid on his back.

You two had an intense battle as he tried to eat you before you swooped down and hit him on the nose. You two then got too tired to continue so you just napped. 

At this point Ace was losing hope in being able to have your sole attention. A shame really. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The nymph was all depressed and sighing a lot as he tended to his duties. It annoyed Deuce so he kept his distance. 

There was then distant chirps, Ace thought it was just Vil before something swooped in and grabbed him causing him, Deuce, Trey, Cater and even Riddle to panic. There was a long coo that calmed them all down, it was only you. Wait it was you!

Ace was so happy he could finally get your attention on him and only him. He didn’t even notice that you bought him to your room before you dropped him into your nest, sitting down beside him. 

It was cuddle time, something Ace has never felt so excited before in his life.

[frozenwafflesagain]

I spent the first hour of my 25th birthday thinking about Ben Hargreeves, as one does.

And thus I present…

A Collection of Ben Hargreeves Thoughts And Theories

- INSANELY misunderstood in my opinion

- There is a difference between how Ben was as a child versus who he is as a (ghost) adult

- The Hargreeves all remember the child Ben was, while Klaus knows who Ben became and loves him for it

- Ben as a child: sweet, quiet, kind, gentle, polite, snarky, serious, timid, fearful, still, obedient, know-it-all

- Ben as an adult: loyal, determined, jaded, unapologetic, realist, tough love, practical, sad, sarcastic, caring, desperate, annoyed

- Everyone says Ben was “the best of them” when they were teenagers; I imagine that he was always there for whoever needed it with a kind word or just a hand to hold. Ben just wants to help, I think that’s one trait that stayed with him into adulthood.

- He was afraid of the Horror growing up, obviously. He didn’t want to use it, we can assume from this that he never took pleasure in the death and destruction it brought. He literally says “I didn’t sign up for this.”

- Seemed to go along with Klaus’ pranks, even enjoy them. He might have had a bit of a wild side as a teenager that faded a bit after he died.

- We know he was scared to move on to the afterlife when he died. I think it was because he didn’t want to leave his family yet.

- He stayed with Klaus all those years, and he didn’t have to. He CHOSE to. I think he wanted to stay with Klaus, give him someone to hold on to and watch out for him no matter how frustrating it got.

- But even though he wouldn’t abandon Klaus, Ben very clearly got angry and frustrated and annoyed with him, and understandably so. He had to watch Klaus waste away the life he didn’t get to have.

- When he says as much to Klaus when they’re at the motel, I don’t think this was Ben choosing to rub the reality of his death in Klaus’ face. I don’t think he was doing it to be malicious, because that’s not Ben. I think that he was trying to give Klaus something else to focus on while he was reliving his trauma. Tough love - yeah, what he was saying was undoubtedly hard for Klaus to hear, and I’m sure Ben was airing out his own grievances, but I think it was in the name of distraction more than anything else. If Klaus could think about what Ben was going through instead of focusing on the memories, that could help him in the end.

- In regards to the S2 possession: I chalk that up to poor writing and poor characterization. Ben ASKING Klaus to possess him makes sense to me, but everything else that he does without consent I see as a failure to understand Ben’s character. After everything they went through as kids, after everything Ben himself went through, after the things he probably saw happen to Klaus on the streets, I simply refuse to believe that Ben would have “no regrets” about taking control of Klaus’ body like that. The person the writers have set up Ben to be prior to those scenes would NEVER have been okay with that. Honestly, in my mind, those Ben scenes are not canon.

-That being said, his decision to save Viktor makes perfect sense. As much as he clearly wanted to stay with Klaus, he knew he would finally make an impact on his sibling’s lives if he could get to Viktor and help him control his powers. Again, he showed Viktor tough love along with compassion: he didn’t let him give up.

- But wanting a hug as he goes? There’s the Ben they all knew as kids.

- I think he probably regretted not getting to tell Klaus the truth in his last moments, which is why he asks Viktor to do it. He didn’t want Klaus to carry around the guilt he must have felt at the idea that he made Ben stay. Ben, despite growing harder and more jaded in death, is still kindhearted.

- Predictably, dying greatly affected his personality and the way he saw things as he stayed with Klaus.

[multiplicity-positivity]

hi uh i could use some advice :<

im a host of a recent system of 20-ish and guh i am t i r e d

im mainly looking for advice on how to switch or just retreat into the headspace/leave front or even just kinda stop being fully aware while still being in front for awhile bc id rlly like to take a break and the realization that im most likely front attracted/frontstuck is kinda making me more tired of being in front

also if it helps at all my(&) system is parogenic + traumagenic in origin (specifically parotraumagenic) and theres kinda iffy communication between members (some of them i have clear communication with and they randomly pop up to say stuff, some i have no idea where they are and some of them i can usually only hear when im directly interacting with them).

afaik (as far as i know) only three?? ppl have rlly "fronted" per se, and the rest have been co-con

i apologize for the long and mildly depressing ask but any help is appreciated also dont forget to hydrate

Hello! We have some posts that might help you that we’d like to share if that’s okay. The first is a post we wrote a while back with some tips on switching from our own experience:

We’d also like to share this post by @rin-and-jade on being frontstuck or frontlocked, and how to go about unsticking yourself!

Our own system host (Parker) is almost always fronting to some extent. It can certainly be exhausting and disheartening fronting nonstop, especially when other members of your system can seemingly come and go as they please. He’s going to put some info under a cut for how he copes with fronting constantly, in case you want some advice on coping with being genuinely unable to switch out!

We hope something here will be helpful for you! We’re wishing you the best of luck with switching out or at least learning how best to cope with fronting in your future!

(Host here - I’ll just write this bit if thats okay. Anyway here’s some stuff I do to deal with The Horrors of perpetual existence)

Meditation

Taking a few moments to sit in comfortable silence can be useful for me when I’m feeling stressed or overwhelmed or straight up exhausted. Here’s how I meditate (I’m no expert and I’m sure there’s better ways to do this… this is just what I do)

- get in a comfortable position in a quiet place where I’m not likely to be disturbed

- set a timer on my phone for 5 minutes

- close my eyes, focus on my breathing

- don’t dwell on any thoughts but also don’t push them away; acknowledge them and let them go

- try to stay still and calm until my timer goes off

And that’s it. Sometimes I get interrupted by an alter or something outside, but for the most part, this is how I’ve been able to meditate effectively.

Rest

I take naps whenever I can. I sit down whenever I can. I’ll literally just close my eyes for a few minutes whenever I can. Our body has issues with chronic fatigue, and fronting constantly can sometimes exacerbate our exhaustion. So yeah I am a huge fan of naps and will often set a timer for like 15-20 minutes and snooze whenever the opportunity arises. Even just lying down with closed eyes can help replenish some energy.

Distractions

Reading, watching something on TV, or playing video games can help give me somewhat of a break even if I’m still fronting. I do tend to try and keep us distracted as much as possible… sometimes to our own detriment. But if you find that you really aren’t ever able to switch out, or if your system is specutien and that’s just the way your system functions, finding things you enjoy that can serve as distractions may help you as well.

Saying No

This one’s tough, but I’m trying to learn to say no when I’m overwhelmed or have too much on my plate. This means sometimes I’ll cancel plans, hand off a responsibility, make a compromise, or turn down an opportunity if I don’t have the energy for it.

Honestly idk how much my addition can help you, but if you find that you’re not ever able to switch out at all please know there’s other folks out there in similar positions. Hoping you can make the most of your situation, anon /genuine

[kthynes]

For husband for hire does Lloyd like to take her out on dates ? If so what do they usually do/go?

talk of the town

18+

warnings: course language. Fake marriage trope. Mafia!Lloyd. Antsy reader who worries things are becoming a little too real, too fast. A dash of unspoken jealousy from miss reader. Lots of character development.

authors note: just to preface this question with an answer (and a one shot), Lloyd barely takes the reader on dates bc they both make it known to one another that it’s a terminal commitment meaning they were never too keen on getting to know one another in the first place. BUT of course time and proximity changes perspective and this little ficlet is meant to show that.

This has not been beta’d- mistakes are my own

“What are we doing?”

“We are going on a date.” Lloyd looks around the old palatial bistro that eyelets the rich and affluent. He has a tick where he fumbles with the button on his suit jacket, quietly calling to his men that saunter the dimly lit establishment. Head high, feet stumbling in a pair of crystalline Jimmy Choos, you find yourself pivoting sharp turns and wait staff who acknowledge you with awestruck candor. “This isn’t any particular order of business. Just you and I.”

“Oh.” You were used to showing face. Months in as a newly engaged couple, you owed it to Lloyd and his company by sitting pretty and doe eyed, making yourself to be the perfect trophy wife amongst the tribe. Tonight was seemingly auspicious. Foreign music flitted through the high ceilings in a place you’ve never been to before let alone know the name of.

Lloyd looks over his shoulder to espy your bemusement. He takes a gallant step back and levels next to you with a hand gently guiding you forward and through uncharted waters. “Something wrong with that?”

“I don’t know, I just didn’t think it was mandatory for us to go on dates.” You had come to your senses the second you found yourself huddled in his arms, floating up a raft of stairs. Your heels sink and wobble in the ascent. Lloyd’s careful in the short flight.

“You deserve to be taken care of mi Luna.” He assures in a tone that’s entirely ingenuous.

You use a hand to steady yourself away from him. Distance is primitive and you wanted to play it safe. “I can do that very much for myself.”

“With what? That trusty little satisfyer pro of yours?” Lloyd playfully draws you back in. Your body softly collides with his, your expressions fleeting like electricity.

“Oh my fucking god!” You screech, skin set ablaze under the silk dress you had on. Never in this lifetime did you think you’d be caught dirty. Yet here you were incriminated by your vices. You were a fall from grace and Lloyd took the opportunity to wield his case. “Don’t.”

“I hear you going at it at ungodly hours in the morning. You’re never really discreet about it either.” He cuts you with a villainous look that strokes his masochism.

“So what you’re really trying to say is that I have no privacy in that god damn house.” You fight a fight, your body leaning back as his arm barricades a steady hold on your waist. Lloyd liked seeing this side of you. Fiesty and shortcoming. A bit of you was home to him. He couldn’t help but fall for you, slowly, surely, all so inevitably.

“Not when you’re a nymphomaniac.” He finally chuckles. “Look, you don’t have to put out for me. Just have a good time and then actually, with sincerity, thank me later.”

“I don’t owe you that.” He purses his lip, content on being silent but easily taken aback by your flustered beauty. Distracted almost.

“Mr. Hansen.” A petite brunette greets him right by the stair rails. She’s quirky and cute, eyeing you both while you're absently dismissive. “Your table is ready.”

“Thank you Mariella.”

“You two know each other?” You sass, turning to Lloyd once you break out of his grasp. He allows it this one time. But the feeling of letting go, hollows him out. It’s embittering.

“We’ve fucked around here and there.” Lloyd shrugs, jaded as can be. Mariella giggles, clearly approving of the joke.

“Funny.”

“Right this way.” She slices through the tension that stems from your embarrassment which Lloyd gets around in good spirits.

“Learn to take a joke, will yeah?” He murmurs in your hair, his front pressed closely against your back. You don’t feel him but you partly wish you did. Your mind went there and that made you slightly recoil.

“Here you are.” Mariella exhibits a nice sitting area away from the other patrons. The set up was more intimate, a small patio table, two chairs, candles almost everywhere. The red ambiance, sultry sheer curtains. Buckets of champagne, wine, liquor, you name it. Table menus and a private chef. It was inexplicably lavish for comfort, let alone comprehension. As Mariella excuses herself you turn to Lloyd who idles by.

“Is this your place of business?” You wonder, taking in the maroon upholstery that could’ve seen potential bloodshed.

“One of many. So sit…” He eagerly moves you around and pulls out a chair for you like a bred gentleman. You collapse into your seat as he makes way to his with a spiel. “Relax, have a drink or two, see what you like and order away to your heart's content.”

“I’m sorry but I can’t...” You say while on the edge of your seat.

“What?” He cringes, worried about the unimaginable. The panic settles in a decibel.

“You’re taking this way too seriously.” You shake your head.

Lloyd frowns, head hung low and trying to keep the disappointment from being blatant.

“I don’t think I can keep up.”

“But we’re not done here?”

“No but you’re trying to make something out of nothing and I can see that.” You rebut.

“Maybe. But I’m also not giving a fuck.”

“People are little more than convinced, Lloyd.” You state wearily. Everyone has bought into your charade and every day there’s anticipation. You hear the endless musings about potential wedding dates, recounting your meet cute over and over again to those who eagerly ask. There was no means to an end and that’s what worried you the most. Lloyd took it upon himself as a graceful blessing in disguise.

“So let them be!” He starts to pour you a glass of your favorite wine without being asked. “You have nothing to worry about, Bella.”

You let out a disbelieving sigh. “I can’t believe you.”

“Cheers.” He dismisses and clinks glasses with you. There’s some foretelling assurance through his actions. You canvas into the night by going through with the date, quietly keeping your thoughts at bay but your fullest attention on him. The man of the hour. Your best act.

[rin-hanarin]

Random dirkjohn headcanons and scenarios... 2!

I might actually do something with these one day. Also APPARENTLY THERE'S A SYMBOL LIMIT ON TUMBLR AND I HIT IT LMAO

Two things: 1) All of my hypothetical scenarios take place on Earth C, 2) There's a lot of fluff here, brace yourselves.

Dirk has a "John is upset" voice and refuses to admit that he does.  He talks softer to him and filters himself more, and Roxy notices it and thinks that it's adorable how mellow and accommodating Dirk is with him.

John meanwhile can read him better than Dirk thinks and knows when he’s bothered by something. He’s trying to distract him with jokes and silly teasing without trying to make him explain himself, he’s just trying to make him comfortable and relax, even if it doesn’t help long term. 

Dirk gets his own place at some point before they start dating because John doesn't like spending too much time in his childhood home, but also thinks that it's awkward to impose on the place Dirk shares with Jake. John is absolutely ecstatic about the idea of decorating a new place while Dirk thinks it's too damn big for the two of them, let alone just him: he's used to a cramped apartment after all. John ends up deciding what goes where for the most part, and Dirk eventually gets into it after seeing his enthusiasm. They argue about dumb shit and Dirk goes on and on about something like couch placement even though he doesn't really care. John doesn't even really live with him at first, but brings posters, clutter items and things like pillows and curtains (blue ones because Dirk mentioned them at some point and he thinks it's funny.) The house gradually starts looking really cozy, and Dirk doesn't need to explain to his guests who's responsible for it. Their friends start bringing him kitchen appliances, comforters and useless things to place on shelves as gifts to John's completely gleeful reaction, and Dirk is just glad to see him happy, even though their friends are making fun of him. It's not their place, but it totally is.

The house eventually gets wired with all sorts of mutual pranks and traps. They let others crash, but it's on them if they set off something they weren't supposed to. Dirk tends to overdo things, and on one hand John enjoys listening to him explain how he came up with a mechanism or how he made it, but on the other you don't just start a prank war with a mechanic who is as resourceful as he is invested in his craft. He doesn't really make anything particularly dangerous, but John just in case walks around half incorporeal.

They accidentally start sharing wardrobe sometimes because of the shared laundry. John likes oversized shirts, so they fit taller Dirk just fine; Dirk's regular clothes aren't that different from John's oversized ones, but he sometimes wears skin tight tanks, so they more or less fit John. Neither of them bat an eye because who cares about shirts, and John is just a little bit embarrassed by people commenting on how close he is with his platonic second best bro. The first best bro is innerly losing his shit when he sees a hat logo on John's shirt or Dirk wearing an unusually comfy sweater, but fortunately (for John) Rose is the one who has to listen to him process that out loud.

Jade completely innocently mentions that she can't tell their smells apart anymore, and John's initial reaction is neutral because duh no shit they live together, and Dirk's innerly freaking out because Rose and Jane are present to hear that and raise eyebrows at him, meaning that Roxy will hear about that, meaning that everyone will hear about that because she can't keep gossip to herself. Dirk, however, is also pleased in a kind of possessive fashion, but no one needs to hear about that.

John joins Dirk and Jake in their friendly-but-totally-competitive sparring sessions one day, set up because they both have way too much energy to burn. Jake gets his ass handed to him because he actually sucks at fighting, Jake's every "strife" with John is more of a game of tag than a fight and they're just having a good time with Dirk as their more than willing witness. Meanwhile Dirk can't consciously land a hit on John, he can neither swing at him nor point a sword at him without his hands failing him because he has no idea how much John can handle, but also because he looks so soft and comfortable and non threatening and Dirk would rather ruffle his hair than hit him. John is kinda flattered by that, but he's also annoyed that Dirk doesn't treat him seriously and assumes that he's too fragile to fight for some reason, both of which are wrong and John fails to see why at first because he'd fight Dirk for many things actually. He ends up taunting and teasing him, but also showing off his incorporeal wind state. He even makes Rose vouch for him and prove that he literally can't be stabbed when he's like that when he learns that Dirk's just worried out of his mind again. Dirk eventually lets himself relax, gets into it and actually starts responding to John's taunts, and John turns it into a chase with a cheeky "catch me if you can." They're being complete clowns with John being a brat and Dirk chasing him with a fucking sword, but they're having a blast, getting handsy with each other sometimes when Dirk briefly catches John before he disappears in a gust of wind with obnoxious cackling. Dirk eventually manages to catch him off guard with some remark and restrain his hands behind his back, pressing the dull side of his blade to his neck, and they're just catching their breaths and chuckling at each other's disheveled states. They kind of lose track of time in the heat of the moment, until Jake decides that he's seen enough flirting for the day and not enough fisticuffs. He loudly clears his throat and calls them out with something like "Nothing warms the heart quite like seeing two stand-up gents frolicking and having a mighty fine time!", to which John and Dirk just awkwardly pull away from each other, all ruff and flustered like their unlabeled relationship doesn't raise any eyebrows on a regular basis anyway. Jake makes it a recurring thing with them and even invites others to their strife sessions to join the peanut gallery. He even manages to convince very unimpressed Dave to join and see that there's no actual fighting going on most of the time and that he doesn't need to worry about John fighting and getting injured by his "Bro", because said bro is scared shitless to actually hurt John and turns their sparring into a rather embarrassing snugglefest.

Dirk sometimes writes down his rhymes, even though he's more used to improv, and John one day finds them and makes him read them with a feeling and passion like poetry because it sounds hilarious (and maybe he likes Dirk's voice a little bit), he even provides piano ambience for him. Dirk actually goes along with it, and John's dying on his keyboard laughing after a particularly dramatic "Yo"s or "Uh"s, which are normally more Dave's style, but Dirk just thought that it'd be a nice addition. Rose is very willing to join them after she one way or another finds out about that, and that's the closest thing to friendly bonding that happens between Rose and Dirk without both of them being way too difficult because they're just Like That.

[duhragonball]

Journey to the West ch.7-69

So I've been kind of inactive on this blog for a few weeks, and that's mainly because I've been trying to catch up on unread comic books, and also the 16th Century Chinese novel, Journey to the West. I am large, I contain multitudes.

I meant to document my thoughts on the book more often than this. Back in... wow, January, I wrote about the first six chapters, and then I got up to about chapter 27 and fell behind. This week, I finally caught up to @journeytothewest-daily , whose mailing list got me to read the book in the first place, and I've finally managed to pull ahead.

I feel like the book has become easier to read. That probably has more to do with me than the book, as I feel like I've gotten acclimated to the writing style and the episodic format.

The early chapters basically set up the characters. Sun Wukong gets an origin story, Tripitaka Tang gets an origin story, and then they get paired up and add Eight Rules and Sha Monk to their sqaud. Oh, and the talking horse. He doesn't talk much, so it's easy to forget about him. Once the main cast is assembled, the other 80% of the book is just these guys journeying to the west, and it settles into a pretty simple formula.

The monks come across some obstacle, settlement, or town, and they need to obtain food, lodging, travel papers, or a path forward.

While working on that, some bad guy shows up and captures Tripitaka Tang. Usually, this is a demon who believes that eating Tripitaka Tang will make him immortal, but they don't want to eat him right away, so they make plans to invite guests and marinate him really good or whatever.

Sun Wukong has to save his master, which ought to be ridiculously easy, since Sun Wukong has 8,000,000,000 super powers, but somehow it never goes quite right, so he has to fly to various supernatural realms to seek help from various divine figures in Chinese mythology.

Eight Rules might hit the bad guy with his rake during the fight. This usually doesn't matter, but I give him credit for trying. There's a surprising amount of poetry about rakes in this book. Like, it's a magic rake with its own fantastic powers or whatever, but Wukong's so ridiculously OP that it's just a distraction.

Sha Monk is a character who is also in the story.

Also Buddha and the Bodhisattva Guanyin sometimes reveal that they arranged for a bad guy to capture Tripitaka Tang, just to satisfy the requisite hardship he has to endure for this pilgrimage.

And once you get accustomed to the flow of this formula, it gets pretty cozy. I think I struggled with the early parts of the novel because it was setting up a situation I wasn't too familiar with. Also, I was looking for parallels to Dragon Ball, which was directly inspired by Journey to the West, but the connections are subtler than I expected. Once I got the lay of the land, it got easier to follow.

For me, the most interesting feature of the story is the power imbalance. Sun Wukong can basically do anything go anywhere and he's nigh indestructible, and all the gods seem to wholly support him now that he's Tang's disciple, so he can always get divine help whenever he asks for it. I see people complaining that characters like Superman are too powerful to work in storytelling, except Sun Wukong could one-shot an army of Supermans with a single stroke of his magic staff, then bring them back to life by petitioning the gods of the underworld, then kill them again by asking the Jade Emperor to do it for him. And yet Journey to the West still works in spite of this. Everyone who complains about Superman being too powerful needs to read JTTW, so they can see that they were proven wrong 500 years ago.

It is a problem, though, and it seems like the author is aware of it. At one point early in the journey, Eight Rules asks Sun Wukong why he doesn't just carry their master to their destination on his magic cloud. Wukong explains that he can't, because the magic that allows him to travel so quickly on the cloud doesn't work for human passengers. So he can go all over the world (and beyond) to find allies and information to help Tang, but he can't act as transportation. Despite all the divine intervention and supernatural helpers he has, Tang still has to make the journey himself. Wukong and the others can protect him and help him, but they can't do it for him.

And that's Sun Wukong's great weakness. He's invincible, but Tripitaka Tang is not, and if Tang dies, Wukong's mission is a failure. And this is no small thing, because Wukong's entire reason for being in this part of the story is to accompany the Tang Monk. Twice so far, they've had a falling out, and the Tang Monk basically kicked him out of the group, and Wukong very quickly realized he has nowhere else to go, and nothing else to do. For all his vast power, his purpose in life is defined by a very small, fragile thing.

So it's interesting to see how the author tries to balance Wukong's powers with the plot. Obviously there's the Tight Fillet, the golden band on his head which can cause him excruciating pain whenever Tang recites a spell. But there's also other items out there that can give Wukong some difficulty, and I don't think it's a coincidence that the bad guys on the way to India are more challenging than all the good guy supernatural characters that Wukong bullied in his youth. It's a lot easier to fight when you have no particular objective and nothing to protect, and your opponents were just minding their own business and trying to go about their day. Escorting the Tang Monk isn't just a job that Wukong has to do to make up for his past mischief; the problems he encounters along the way reflect the kind of trouble he used to cause. By doing this mission, he's forced to be on the receiving end for a change.

I think, as time went on, later writers started confronting the problem more directly. Dracula had a lot of powers, but Bram Stoker managed to give him enough weaknesses to suspend disbelief. Superman has his Kryptonite, but I think what really mattered was when characters like Superman started teaming up on a regular basis, and it became clear that the weaker characters needed to have some way to be relevant to the story. A lot of creative solutions have been developed over time, but unfortunately those don't seem to have been around in the 1500's, so Sha Monk just sort of stands around while the action unfolds. When you're the third-strongest disciple, and the strongest one doesn't need your help, what else is there?

[unpredictable-probabilities]

Azul Ashengrotto of Royal Sword Academy || Chapter 3: A Little More Part of His World

Summary

While shopping for what to wear at the Autumn Dance, Jamil runs into Azul.

They decide to spend more time together and gain a better understanding of each other’s lives. After a particularly relaxing day, Jamil takes a step to make sure that Azul becomes a little more present in his life.

Word Count: 5,437

Jamil is walking along the aisles of the department store, idly looking at the rows of suits hanging on the racks.

Crowley announced yesterday that NRC is invited to the RSA Autumn Dance, and Jamil is looking to see if he can find anything he'd like to wear.

As he gets closer to one corner of the store, he hears soft music. There's a piano set up here that anyone can play if they wanted to, so that wasn't a surprise.

Jamil looks at the suits hanging in one aisle, and he catches a glimpse of the piano player on one of the mirrors on a wall.

He's wearing a dark purple hoodie and black pants with white sneakers, pretty normal clothing. What caught Jamil's attention is the purple-silver hair and the glasses.

Is that Azul?

Jamil curiously turns to see if it is, and quietly walks towards him to watch him play.

As he steps closer, he can see that it's definitely Azul. He has a look of calm concentration as his slender fingers smoothly glide over the keys, coaxing out melodies that floated in the air.

Azul looks completely in his element. He's subtly swaying to the music, and when Jamil listened closer he could hear Azul humming.

Jamil wonders if he recognizes the song.

Regardless, though, he closes his eyes and basks in the soothing melody.

The lyrics come to him as the song reaches its end.

The parade traveled on With the sun in my eyes, you were gone But I knew even then In a crowd of thousands I'd find you Again

Jamil lets the silence settle before speaking.

"You can play the piano as well now? Smart and talented," he teases. "You're never going to run out of tricks up your sleeves, are you?"

Azul turns to him in surprise, then chuckles as he recognizes him.

"I used to be in a band with Jade and Floyd in middle school. I still play from time to time." He turns in his seat to face him properly.

"A band with Jade and Floyd?" Jamil repeats, incredulous at this revelation. "How did that even come to be? And what was it like having those two as bandmates?"

"We all liked music," Azul shrugs. "And there was a music club so we all joined. Jade played the bass, Floyd the drums. We had fun, mostly. The trick was trying to get Floyd to cooperate during rehearsals, because sometimes he gets in a mood where he would just hit whatever notes he wanted on the drums. Jade was the one in charge of gauging when Floyd would be most cooperative, and we learned to manage with Floyd's capriciousness, more or less," he smiles in amusement.

"That must've been fun," Jamil sarcastically uttered. "Wish we had our very own Jade in Basketball Club to gauge his capriciousness there."

Azul chuckles. "What brings you here?" He slides to one side of the cushioned bench, looking at Jamil with a silent invitation that he can sit down if he wants to.

Jamil nods towards the rest of the shop. "NRC's been officially notified of the dance so I'm here buying myself an outfit to go in. What about you? Do you work here or something?" he asks, taking the invite and sitting next to Azul.

Azul shakes his head. "I just come here from time to time whenever my schedule allows it," his smile has a certain sadness to it. Before Jamil could even wonder if he should ask about it, Azul changes the subject.

"I'm guessing you haven't found an outfit yet? Given the absence of shopping bags?"

Jamil glances down at his empty hands. "You guessed correctly. I got distracted by someone playing so, if anything, you're the one to blame." He playfully smiles. "How long are you gonna be stuck here playing piano?"

Azul smiles back, then he turns to the piano and sighs.

"I suppose I'm done for today." He looks at Jamil again. "Should I make it up to you, then, by helping you find an outfit?"

"Sounds fair," Jamil simply says, standing up. "So… 'you suppose you're done' with the playing? Do you do this as a hobby?" He glances around. "If so, why this particular shop?"

Azul closes the lid of the piano and stands up as well. "I play in RSA during programs, but yes, I also do it as a hobby sometimes."

He's quiet for a moment before he continues, like he's choosing his words carefully.

"And I like playing here because… well, no one knows me here. Until today, of course," Azul smiles playfully in an attempt to mask the melancholy in his eyes.

Jamil looks at Azul, confused, but a little concerned. "If you want, I can go and leave this store be. I know what it's like to want a place to yourself."

"Oh, no, it's all right," Azul says. "This is a public mall, after all, I don't have the right to tell anyone not to go here. Besides, I don't really mind if you know." He nods to the direction of the clothes. "Shall we?"

Jamil's cogs begin to move, trying to piece the things together. In the meantime, he moves to the side and lets Azul lead the way.

"Final question about your hobby: how come you don't mind if I know?" He decides to try asking as he follows him.

Azul hums thoughtfully as he begins to walk in no particular direction. "I don't know… I just never felt like… you expected anything from me, I suppose?" he lightly scratches the back of his head. "Too often when my professors or schoolmates hear me play, they ask if I'll be playing that song in a program or in one of our volunteer works. Meanwhile, you called me smart and talented," he looks at Jamil playfully. "And I don't mind your questions either," he shrugs. "Whether it's about my hobbies or not."

"Oh…" Jamil mouths, before his brows furrow at Azul's response. He knows all too well what it's like to have expectations heaped upon you. Many of them come from people all around him whose opinions he never usually asks for. Some of them come from his own self. "...I'm glad you didn't mind me prying a little." He clears his throat. "Anyway… Do you already have a suit?"

"Not yet," Azul says. "I'd been so busy with the preparations that I hadn't even thought about it. Maybe I can find one here," he looks around. "What about you? What kind of suit are you looking for?"

Jamil eyes the jackets on the rack, absentmindedly thumbing through them. "Oh, well... I'm not looking for anything special in particular. I'm not much of an expert when it comes to formal wear... Possibly nothing too restricting since I still gotta put Floyd on the ropes on that upcoming dance-off, but… does this event have a dress code?"

"Dance-off?" Azul raises an eyebrow in amusement. "I'd like to see that. And the dress code is relatively just the usual: dress shirt, slacks, possibly a coat, any shoes that aren't open-toed nor sneakers. That's the minimum. Anything beyond that such as capes, boots, and accessories are allowed. Who else is competing in this dance-off?" he asks curiously.

"Just me and Floyd, unless someone else joins in," Jamil replies. He already has a white dress shirt: his school uniform (that he barely wears, anyway), so a suitable tie or a coat might work—

His eyes catch some vests across the room and he wordlessly makes his way over, looking through them to see which ones are both affordable and stylish.

He turns to Azul. "Speaking of dancing, how about you? Still feeling little less than confident about your skills there?"

"I think referring to it as 'skills' might be a little generous," Azul says lightly. "Oh, and I certainly don't want to follow after your dance-off with Floyd. I don't need that comparison. I believe you're quite the good dancer, then? To participate in such a competition in public?"

"I'm decent enough," Jamil decides to try to put up some air of humility, though it's clear by the confident tilt of his chin how he truly thinks of his talent. "Though I can't have Floyd getting too smug on me without a fight..." He pulls out a dark-grey vest. "Do you think a dark tone of color would be appropriate?"

"Of course, why wouldn't it be?"  Azul steps closer and gently takes the fabric of the vest in his hand to look at it closer.

Then he looks up at Jamil. "This looks good, and it does match your eye color," he smiles.

Jamil stares right back into Azul's eyes, taking note of their close proximity. He then tears his gaze away to the fabric, thinking and getting an idea. "... Hey, how often do you wear dark outfits?"

Azul considers it. "Very rarely. This hoodie is one of the few dark outfits I own. I admittedly wore it so there's a less likely chance that I'd be recognized," he smiles sheepishly. "Why do you ask?"

Jamil makes a conspiratorial smile, lightly waving the vest around. "Wanna try switching things up a lil', then? We in NRC rarely get to wear any light-colored ensembles, so what say you to wearing something dark while I don the exact opposite?"

"Oh," Azul says with interest. "That does sound appealing. How does this work? Shall we look together for our ensembles, or do we split up to find them and then meet back at the fitting rooms in 30 minutes?"

"The latter one sounds preferable," Jamil replies, giving Azul a two-fingered salute as he places the outfit back and heads over to another part of the store. "Try not to be late."

Thirty minutes later, they're at the fitting rooms. No one else is trying clothes at the moment, so they had the viewing room to themselves, surrounded by vacant cubicles.

"Jamil," Azul nods to him. "I trust you found something tasteful?"

Jamil's quite content with his own fashion sense, so with fabrics draped over his arms, he simply shrugs. "I'll let you be the judge of that, Mister Committee Member. In the meantime, how was your haul? Did you have any trouble?"

"I'm not used to shopping for dark clothing, but it is quite fun," Azul says. "I realized I have more options now. And I know it's not a competition but," Azul looks up at him playfully through his eyelashes. "I must say that I'm far more confident in my fashion sense than my dancing," Azul says, playfully smug as he disappears inside a cubicle.

Oh? Well now... It's good to see that Azul's spirits seemed to have returned.

With Jamil's natural competitive streak provoked, he heads into his own respective cubicle and went for a classic white tux and slacks. It's not what he'd personally go for, but it was worth a look at.

"I look like I'm going to star in a winter wonderland display," he comments aloud, checking himself out in a mirror. "How do you guys handle getting stains on your school uniforms? I always figured white clothes are harder to don around in public on account of potential dirt or stains becoming much easier to see."

"Ah, that's part of RSA's education," Azul's voice replies. "We always have to be careful on how we move and go around places, because the slightest mistake could show on our uniforms. The same goes as well for our table manners. If we spill food on our clothes, it would be quite noticeable. The uniforms help enforce best behavior, apparently…" Azul's voice fades out for a moment. "How about your dark uniforms? Doesn't it get uncomfortable in hot weather?"

"As someone who's grown up under an arid climate, the weather in Sage's Isle is actually quite cool, which is why it's still comfortable for me to wear a hoodie under my blazer." He replies, a tad grateful for the change of focus from RSA's… intriguing mindset over their uniforms. "By the way, do we show each other our prototypes too, or do we only limit ourselves to our final choice?"

"I don't see why we should set a limit. Unless you picked a lot of outfits and it would be quite troublesome to show all of them. So it's fine either way," Azul replies.

"Hm, alright, let's show these," Jamil heads out of his cubicle, waiting for Azul to come out. "All I'm missing now is a top hat and a monocle to really complete that old-timey gentleman whose clothes have been bleached of color."

There is a splash of color, though. Underneath the buttoned-up white jacket is a dark blue undershirt and a red tie.

"And maybe a cloak, too," he adds. "They probably had long cloaks back then."

Azul chuckles. "I would certainly like to see you in that. Meanwhile, I look like a vampire."

The door opens and Azul steps out. He's wearing a black dress shirt with a lighter shade of black vest on top of it, black pants, and a black coat with wide collars and shiny buttons. The coat's long cuffs are folded back at the wrists, showing the red lining that matches the collars. A red bow tie sits neatly by Azul's neck, and a silver buckle cinches the belt that's almost entirely covered by the coat.

"A vampire who is also a pirate's intern," Azul concludes.

"You do look like you'd be hosting a banquet in a haunted manor somewhere," Jamil jokes. "I'm not gonna go with mine, it's almost too white. Scrubbing the dirt off of these is gonna be a nightmare. But hey, for what it's worth, you don't look too bad in black."

"Thank you," Azul tips his head in playful politeness. "I'm not wearing this to the dance either, though. I'm not entirely fond of the wide collars and cuffs, and it being mostly black makes me look paler than Mr. Idia Shroud."

"What look do you wanna go for, then?" Jamil asks.

"Something a little above the minimum requirement for the dress code, I don't want to look like I'm just half-baking my outfit. And I'd like a coat as well, though not as long as this one. And another color besides red, perhaps, I don't think this shade in particular is for me."

He looks at Jamil. "How about you?"

"I think I'm gonna go for somthing a little simpler," Jamil states, prioritizing flexibility in the fabric. "Meanwhile, why not go with a color related to the ocean? Or maybe even purple, like the Sea Witch's thing? Wasn't she a cephalopod, too?"

"Yes, and I do like purple," Azul nods. "And best of luck with finding a suit worthy of winning a dance-off. Meet back out here in 20?"

"20," Jamil repeats, nodding and making his way back to the pile he had picked out for himself.

Though he was going for something as simple as a vest, he can't help but think about Azul's comment.

He certainly doesn't want to seem underdressed in comparison.

In the end, he settles with a buttoned coat of white and light grey over a dress shirt and a scarlet cravat. Below his waist, his pants are dark, and he figures that though he may not have completely followed an all-white ensemble, it was still more white than any of his clothes back at school, so it could still work.

Now all that would be left are boots and he'd resemble a stylish ringmaster of a circus. Inspecting himself in the mirror, he does a spin to see if he could still breathe and move around.

"All right," He announces, walking out. "How does this look?"

The cubicle across from him opens and Azul walks out.

He looks at Jamil's ensemble and a smile appears on his face.

"Ah, scarlet is a good color on you. And the fabrics look flexible enough, I imagine you'd have no trouble dancing. Impeccable taste, Jamil Viper," Azul nods playfully.

"How about this?" he looks down at this suit and smooths it out. "I took your advice on the purple, and I think the gold patterns balance out the black and keeps me from looking too pale."

He's wearing a black dress shirt and pants, and the purple coat has gold patterns swirling out from the middle. The design is tipped at the shoulders, almost resembling the wings of a butterfly spreading out. The patterns on the bottom fall down in softer waves.

There are also gold patterns on the sleeves, and when Azul slowly turned once, Jamil saw that the wing-like pattern continues at the back, though at a smaller scale.

Jamil's eyes widen at Azul's appearance.

Beautiful, his brain thinks.

"Expensive," his mouth says before he clears his throat. "It looks nice on you, though. I can see why you're so confident with your taste in fashion."

"And a good thing, too. I wouldn't be embarrassed dancing with someone as beautiful as you. Well, at the very least, my outfit wouldn't be embarrassing. My dancing, we are yet to see," Azul says playfully. "Shall I get this one, then? I'm not entirely sure if the dress shirt fits right."

Azul removes his coat and looks down at the black dress shirt. It hugs his body enough that Jamil could see that it's more toned than it looks when Azul is wearing the more loose RSA uniform, and he could see the outline of Azul's biceps when he flexes his arms to adjust the cuffs of the sleeves.

It's not like Azul is buff like that Savanaclaw freshman Jack Howl, but the sight does remind Jamil that Azul had mentioned last time that his fast reflexes are "part of the training". He wonders just what kind of training Azul does.

"Not that it's uncomfortable, I'm just not used to wearing such a tight fit," Azul continues.

Jamil was already at a loss for words when Azul complimented him so earnestly, but then as he looks at Azul's torso without the coat, he can't help but let his eyes linger.

"It fits you just fine," he mutters, looking away. 

"I must hand it to you, Jamil, your idea of switching up our usual colors turned out much better than I thought, and I already thought it was quite the good idea in the first place. Now I'm even more glad that you're my date to the dance," he says playfully. "I shall have them wrap this up before I wrinkle it further," he turns and disappears inside the cubicle again.

Jamil had kept his gaze away, so when he looked and saw that the other was no longer there, he hastily made his way back to his dressing room and changed.

"Any other errands you have to run for today?" Azul asks Jamil as they make their way out of the department store.

"No, that's about it," Jamil shrugs, a shopping bag now tucked in his arms. "I had been planning on heading straight back to NRC… Unless… "

He gives Azul an inquisitive look. "What about you? Any errands you gotta run today, for yourself or for your school?"

Azul shakes his head. "No. I'd just been planning to play the piano there and possibly roam around to look for something else to do. Do you have any recommendations? Perhaps a bird café this time?" he smiles.

Jamil rolls his eyes. He can't tell if Azul meant for that to be sarcastic or sincere, but he's not feeling particularly hungry. "Some time away from the hustle and bustle of people might be nice. Maybe a cove or a beach somewhere... Ah, although that might be more of the usual for you, since your school's right by the shore from all sides."

"I wouldn't mind it," Azul says. "I actually go to the beach at RSA quite often. The waves sound different here on the surface, and I like listening to it. It makes me think of home while at the same time reminding me of where I am now. How about you? Where do you go when you want to be somewhere by yourself? Or is it somewhere classified like my top-secret corner of the department store?"

"Considering I intruded on your classified sanctuary, I think it's only fair that I tell you mine, just so you know where you can plan your revenge someday," Jamil smoothly replied. "Back then, it'd be the front yard of the Asims' palace, since it's usually spacious and quiet. But ever since Kalim kept on finding me during my breaks, I started hanging around the rooftops, higher than anyone can reach. So unless you're willing to scale a random building to the top, mind leading me to the closest cove around here?"

Azul made a face. "I don't plan on scaling any building. You're right about the suit being expensive, and I'd like to be alive enough to actually wear it."

He turns to Jamil. "How am I supposed to plan my revenge when your sanctuary is exceedingly difficult to reach? My Flight professor will tell you that you don't need to worry at all about me bothering you anywhere high up."

Jamil playfully pouts. "Aww, that's too bad. Guess you'll have to really want it to get to me."

Azul rolls his eyes with an amused smile, then he looks around the area. "I do know a good cove around here. How long before you have to go back to NRC?"

"A few hours, and the bus terminals can get crowded around the evening, so I can only hang around up until..." he checks his wristwatch. "4 in the afternoon, at most."

Azul nods. "The cove is near enough. We should be there in a few minutes."

They arrive at the beach, and Azul leads him to a small cave to the side. The sand is soft under their shoes, and the breeze from the ocean is refreshing.

A few people are there, but they're far enough away that their conversations don't reach them, and the atmosphere remains quiet.

The sand slopes slightly upward into the cave, giving them a view of the ocean if they were to sit in it.

"How's this?" Azul asks smugly.

Jamil makes a low whistle. "I gotta admit you picked a nice spot… Is this your usual go-to when you're in need of a private beach?"

He makes his way over to a smoothed stone jutting out of the sand, patting it down to give himself a seat before lounging back to relax.

Azul doesn't bother with a stone and sits right on the sand next to Jamil, crossing his legs and leaning back on his hands.

"One of them, yes," Azul nods. "I have several, in case one of them gets compromised and I have to move somewhere else," he smiles. "This is one of my favorites, because it faces east and the sunrise is really something to behold. We don't get sunrises—or sunsets—in my hometown, and it's one of the things I really enjoyed upon coming here."

Jamil gazes at Azul's face, looking out into the distance.

"What was it like? When you first became human?"

Azul takes a moment to answer, still looking out at the horizon.

"The light was the first thing I noticed; it’s so bright up here compared to the Coral Sea. In hindsight, that's probably why I need glasses here when I never needed them back home. And walking hurt. I had been used to walking on eight legs my whole life. Learning to just use two was incredibly difficult, especially since gravity here is much different; air is much lighter than water.

Balancing was a little trickier for Rielle, since he's a merman and had no legs at all underwater. Though he and I think it was more painful for me, having all my eight legs compressed into just two.

After we got used to it, I was able to better appreciate other things about land, like the cuisine, for example. My mother owns a restaurant, so I'm no stranger to various foods, but there are a myriad of dishes that simply cannot be cooked underwater without extensive use of enchantments.

Then there's the fashion. Clothes are non-existent back home, so everyone pretty much looked the same all the time, aside from accessories that they might wear. Here, there are a lot of different options with how one would like to present themselves. Oh, and rooftops back home are much easier to access, since we can just swim up there." He turns to Jamil and smiles playfully. "If your rooftop sanctuary is underwater, it'd be much easier for me to get my revenge."

Jamil chuckles. "I first would have to learn how to breathe underwater before I do all of that, unfortunately for you."

He gazes out to the ocean. "... Although I wouldn't mind the idea of traveling to the underwater kingdoms someday. It sounds like a vast place to visit, especially considering how our world consists of about 70% water. It must be a whole new landscape down there, regardless of its dangers. That's probably how you felt about the land, huh? How long have you wanted to go to the surface?"

Azul hums thoughtfully. "Ever since middle school. I've heard stories of the Sea Witch granting merfolk legs, and I thought that it must be quite the dream to reach for if even merfolk back then wanted to do it. Fortunately, the organization that helps merfolk migrate to the surface is owned by Rielle's ancestors, so we had our applications processed even before we received our invitations to RSA."

He turns to Jamil curiously. "Do you plan on traveling a lot after you graduate?"

Oof. What a question.

Jamil remains quiet, imagining himself sailing on a boat heading for that far horizon.

"It's... certainly a dream to consider," He mutters, reminded of what he's trying to set out to do when he got to this island. "Do you plan on sticking around after RSA? Where do you wanna go?"

Azul looks at him with a raised eyebrow. "You know, Jamil, I've noticed that ever since we first met, you've asked me quite a lot of relatively personal questions. And while I've answered them with my rambling tongue, your answers to my questions remain short and vague."

He playfully narrows his eyes. "You're not a spy sent by NRC, are you?"

Jamil's cheeks darken before he brushes a fallen strand of hair from his face. "I'm… just not used to people asking questions about me, that's all."

"You're not used to hanging out with RSA students either, yet here we are," Azul amusedly points out.

"I never thought about RSA at all until I enrolled into NRC and got swept up in the rivalry; whatever disdain I may have developed towards your school is pretty new and doesn't really carry much weight. But prioritizing everyone else before my needs had been a thing since I was a kid, so it's much easier to hang out with an RSA student than talk about my feelings," Jamil replies. "Of course I wanna get out there and travel, but it's not like anyone's given me the option before. Even now, if there's even one bad report about Kalim, it's more than likely that I'd get saddled with him again. Pretend as much as I like, this arrangement of having us separated is fragile and temporary."

He hugs his legs and tucks his chin atop his knees. "So how am I supposed to care about my dreams when no one else has?"

Azul stares at him for a few moments, the waves gently lapping at the shore filling the silence.

"Kalim has mentioned that he intends to free you," Azul says. "Once he has the power to. And for what it's worth… I care about your dreams. Even if I'm not entirely sure what they are," he gives Jamil a small smile before looking out into the ocean again, letting Jamil know that he isn't expecting a response.

Jamil reels from the new revelation that he gets rendered speechless for several moments.

Kalim intends to set him free? It's certainly possible once he's inherited his father's position.

But it's hard to believe when Kalim's wanted nothing more than to have Jamil at his side throughout the years they've been together.

What changed?

And what Azul said about caring…

When Jamil speaks again, his voice is small. "Do you really mean that…? You're not just saying that to be nice?"

Azul looks at him fondly. "Of course I mean it. You deserve true happiness and achieving all of your dreams. I'm not just being nice. I… I care about you," he shrugs. "Do you think I bring just anyone to this beach?" the playfulness is back in his voice.

A smile begins to crawl its way back to Jamil's face. "I wouldn't know, so I guess I'll just have to take your word for it... Thanks. You prolly hear this a lot but I hope you get to achieve whatever dreams you got, too."

"Thank you," Azul smiles back. "You make for much better company than that department store piano."

Jamil holds up his hands. "Hey now, have mercy on your piano companion. It's been there for you when you needed it in the past. Don't cheat on it just for a guy you met."

Azul laughs at Jamil's remark, and they fall into the comfortable silence of each other's company, with the ocean breeze ruffling their hair.

Time quietly passes as they just bask in the warmth of the afternoon and the chill of the sea breeze.

Throughout that, Jamil has his eyes closed, letting the thought of Kalim's promise and growth sink in. A portion of him has begun to feel lighter the more he realizes what this means for him.

Maybe he should call Kalim up later.

"Hey," Azul says softly, as if not wanting to disturb the peace. "It's almost 4 PM."

Jamil blinks himself awake, realizing he fell into a nap at some point.

A part of him is alarmed since he never really falls asleep in public spaces. Doing that back home often led to immediate danger.

But after a few seconds, he recognizes that he isn't in any danger, and merely finds Azul and the orange sky behind him.

"... Oh, right," He mutters, rubbing his eyes. "We should prolly get going, then."

"Indeed." Azul stands up and brushes sand from his pants. Then he looks down at Jamil and offers a hand.

Half-awake, Jamil takes it and helps himself up, hoisting the shopping bag along with him.

"I gotta admit—did not expect to fall asleep in a beach cove when I went out today. It was nice."

"And I didn't expect to buy an outfit for the dance. If you hadn't brought it up, I might have forgotten it altogether and showed up to the dance in my uniform," Azul says playfully, still holding Jamil's hand.

Jamil doesn't let go.

"Guess we're even, then."

They leave the beach area and silently walk hand-in-hand towards the main road, looking at anywhere else except each other.

Jamil stops right where the streets split up for the two bus terminals heading to the different schools. 

They'll have to go their separate paths from here but before they do, he takes out his phone.

"Hey, why don't we exchange numbers? Yanno, just in case there are more 'dance preparations' you'll almost forget to do again," he says playfully, still holding Azul's hand.

Azul chuckles and takes out his phone with his other hand. "Right. I can't afford to forget anything else now, can I?"

He turns his phone to face towards Jamil, showing his number.

Jamil leans close to see the screen, his shoulder brushing against Azul's.

After double-checking that he typed the phone number correctly, Jamil calls it so that his number would be saved in Azul's phone as well.

Then he pockets his phone and lets go of Azul's hand, giving him a friendly pat and a wave as he walks backwards for a few steps.

"Welp. See ya around, Piano Man."

The corner of Azul's lips turns up in a smile as he raises a hand to wave back. "See you around, Viper."

And Jamil heads off, relishing in the joy of a peaceful day, a blooming bond, and a future looking brighter than ever.

Author's Note: The song that Azul was playing on the piano is "In a Crowd of Thousands" from the musical Anastasia~

<-- Chapter 2

Chapter 4 ->

(Masterlist)

[sunshines-bee-farm]

another day [agere fic]

420 tw

Jade never felt good after the holidays. He had to recover from traumatic memories, flashbacks, and general traumaversery symptoms. Reagan tried to help, but didn’t fully understand it. Reagan never had a perfect life, and plenty of trauma of her own, but she was simply further along in the healing process than Jade was. Reagan had found her liferaft and was swimming to shore. 

Jade was drowning. 

He cried in his sleep, cried when he woke up, and cried when he smoked. The only time he didn’t cry was when people were around. He wasn’t exactly trying to hide it from them, it just felt… unbearable when they were gone, and something about his friends being around was distracting enough. 

He stared as Avery loaded him a bowl. They handed it to Jade in his favorite bong, a small thing that was blown to look like a power-up.

“Thank you, Mama,” he said softly. 

They kissed the side of his head. “Smoke up.” 

He took a few hits and when Avery took the bong, he laid back and closed his eyes. He was finally swimming, at least for a moment. 

“My sweet boy,” Avery said softly, “you worry me so much.” 

His eyes watered. “I’m sorry, Mama.” 

“Let me hold you.” 

Jade crawled into his Mama’s lap, and they held him. Reagan came out a moment later. 

“Goodmorning, Mama, goodmorning, Jade.” She rushed into the kitchen to make coffee. 

“Let’s go take a walk, my little love,” Avery said. 

“Can I come?” Reagan called. 

Avery looked to Jade. He nodded. 

“Sure, princess.” 

They put the coffees somewhere safe and made their way outside. They climbed down the vines along the giant flower stalk, the petals vibrant and red in the sky. Reagan grabbed Avery and Jade’s hands as she skipped down the path. 

“Bug, you’re going too fast,” Jade whined softly. 

Reagan paused with a blush. “Sorry, bubby! I’ll slow down.” 

They walked in silence along the wooden planked pathways, down past gardens and scarecrows and heards of cows or pigs, until Avery squeezed Jade’s hand. 

“Will you tell us how we can help?” 

“If I knew,” he said weakly. “I don’t know how to help. Everything just… hurts.” 

“Why don’t we go back and play a game?” Reagan asked. “You can choose!” 

Jade looked up in surprise. “I can?” 

“Of course, bubs,” Avery said with a smile. “You can always pick the game if you ask.”

He looked down, wringing his hands. His wrists and forearms were covered in silly bandz. “My sister never let me pick the game we played.” 

“I don’t like your sister.” Reagan scowled. “She didn’t deserve you.” 

Jade shrugged a little, so Avery took Reagan’s hand and pulled everyone to a stop. “We have to be conscious how we talk about our ex-families, Reagan love. Jade isn’t ready to be harsh with them.”

Jade nodded as Reagan looked down guiltily. “I’m sorry, bug… I just still care about them a lot.” 

“You don’t have to apologize!” Reagan leapt forward and hugged Jade, squishing his cheek into Reagan’s shoulder. “It’s okay. Let’s just not talk about them unless you want to, okay?” 

Jade smiled a bit. “Sounds good.” 

They started heading home. “So what game are you going to pick, love?” Avery asked. 

“Can we have school?” Jade asked timidly. 

Reagan squealed and started running home. Jade raced to follow. Avery laughed as they picked up the pace, meeting their kiddos at the bottom of the vine. Once they were inside the rose’s petals of safety, Reagan rushed to set up their stuffies and dolls while Jade prepared the lesson plan and Avery got their backpack. 

“You can be the teacher, Jade,” Reagan said, giving them the pointer—a stick with a smiling cloud on top. “I’ll be the T.A.” 

Jade’s eyes widened. “I- I don’t know… I don’t think I’d be good at it.” 

“You’ll be great, sweetheart,” Avery promised as they sat at the wooden desk. “Why don’t you just try, and if it gets too much you two can switch?”

“Yeah! Like taking turns!” 

“Okay,” Jade said. “I’ll be the teacher. Pass out these workshbeets, Mx. Bug!” 

“Yes sir mister teacher sir!” Reagan grabbed the worksheets and skipped as he started handing them out. 

“Here you are, student,” he said with a grin as he gave Avery theirs. “Looks like we’re starting with history!” 

Jade looked through their lesson nervously. “Um, Mx. Bug?” He asked softly. “Can you come here?” 

Reagan rushed over. “What’s up, bubby?” 

“I don’t know if I can do this.” He looked down. “I don’t have a big imagination like you do. What if I’m boring?” 

Reagan giggled. “It’s school, Jade. It’s supposed to be boring!” 

Jade blew a raspberry. “Come on, I’m nervous!” 

Reagan hugged him tightly. “I know you can do this, bubby. Why don’t I introduce you?” 

Avery smiled. 

“Okay!” 

Reagan rushed up to center stage. “Goodmorning, class,” she said in her best fancy accent. “Today we’ll be going over the history of Wellinden—how the garden was formed!”

“Psst,” Jade whispered, “and how we got here.” 

“Yes! And how we, the people, got here.” He smiled. “Mr. Bubby, go ahead.” 

“Um… hi, class.” He giggled nervously, hunched in on himself as he stared at the trembling flashcards. “Um… so the flowers started as massive seeds! That were put there by a giant.” 

“Oh, really?” Avery grinned and wrote that down in their notebook. “What kind of giants?” 

Jade faltered. 

“CLOUD GIANTS!” Reagan yelled. 

“Yes! Cloud giants… who… came down from the skies to plant their holy garden! But by the time it grew to completion… the giants were all extinct!” 

Avery gasped. “What a twist!” 

“Yeah! And… and then our first settlers found the garden and used it to hide from the giant mice!” 

Avery chuckled. “Oh, the giant mice? What happened to them?” 

“The fences keep them out! My T.A. will now help me demonstrate what to do when you encounter a giant mice.” 

Reagan giggled as Jade brandished the pointer like a sword. She made her best rodent face, then lurched forward. Avery gasped as Jade whacked at her, missing widely. 

“Careful, kids,” they warned. 

“Heheh, sorry Mama,” Jade said quietly. “Um… yes! Worksheet time!” 

Avery looked down at their worksheet. “I have a question about question number one.” 

“Yes!” Reagan ran over. “What is it?” 

“Is this a philosophical question? ‘How many flowers are in the garden of Wellinden?’ How am I meant to know that?” 

“It is phil-o-soph-ophy,” Jade told them. “It’s a warm up question!”

“Oh! Well, that makes sense. Teacher, can I have a snack?” 

“Why yes,” Reagan said, “we have plenty of snacks for student kiddos. Can I help you by retrieving one, Mr. Bubby?” 

“No, Reagan, I want to get it,” he said softly with a pout. Reagan nodded, so the smile returned as he ran off. 

While he was gone, Avery waved Reagan over. “I’m so proud of you, princess.” 

Her eyes widened. “For what?” 

“For being a good older sibling for Jade. I can’t imagine what he’s going through right now… but I can imagine you’re making him feel very special, and we can’t know what that means to him.” They cupped Reagan’s face. “Keep being my little ray of sunshine, okay? And you know you can come to me when it’s you who needs the support.” 

“Of course I know that, Mama!” She giggled and hugged Avery tight. “We have to be there for bubby!” 

Jade stood behind the doorway, listening. Tears gathered in his eyes. 

He smiled, finished making the snack, and came back in as if nothing had happened. They continued playing, and when they passed out after recess, Avery covered them in a blanket. 

Another day gone, another day healed. 

send me prompts <3 sfw only thanks

[truly-morgan]

[Platonic, father figure, found family]

RenCheng | Mo Dao Zu Shi Modern AU 16-04-2021

[platonic #rencheng – father figure, found family] 

Jc learned young that he would either be ignored or he would be held to a high standard no child should be held to (and if he failed he would be scolded and punished). He was seemingly not what his father was looking for, while he was not enough for what his mother wanted (wants that were fuelled by the way his father would put more attention and care into wwx). 

It was hard to have all this on his small shoulders and he had no one to help him. 

Then came lqr. He was an acquaintance of the family and he had already seen him many times in the past. The man slowly entered his life when jc would often be forgotten after school, when wwx had school club activities and him not (his mother wouldn’t allow it, as it could “distract him too much from his studies”). Lqr couldn’t let a child wait outside (in the rain!) when he could just give him a hand. Jc had been rather shy to accept his help, apologising many times for “being a bother” to him. He tried calling jfm (since, from jc words, yzy was away for work). After the fourth try, he could see how anxious and embarrassed jc seemed to be, as if it was his fault his father had forgotten about him or something. 

He took a look at lwj and lxc sitting in his car, probably starting to be hungry after their own school club activities. He simply suggested taking jc home until he could contact his parents, assuming the jiang wouldn’t mind since they already knew him (and he just /couldn’t/ leave a child alone, in the rain, when it was getting too late for one to be out alone). 

Of course, once home he tried contacting his parents, /again/, while the children were eating, jc sitting shyly while lxc was trying to calm his nerves by talking to him. He was thankful to be able to easily calm down his anger because when he finally reached jfm he was rather angry. At last, the boy was finally able to go home. 

But then it repeated the next week and many other times. It actually became so common that lwj would go and look for jc after his club activities, just to make sure he wasn’t still at school (which actually was often). 

So trips to lqr over his years of primary school were rather common and jc actually became accustomed to the sets of rules the man had in his household. It was really different from the jiang household, but he actually really liked it there. He wasn’t ignored or compared to someone else all the time. Lqr seemed to actually genuinely care about how things were going for him. 

This actually brought many things for more than jc. Jc picked up on some of the lans habits (especially at the table). Jc was the reason lqr actually had some spices in his kitchen. He had seen jc reaction to his food, but had clearly kept his opinion on how bland it was probably to him (he knew the jiang were strong on spices). He had wanted to do a little something that could maybe remind him of home. It was probably not the same, but it was the best he could do when his own tongue was not used to spice anymore. 

Jc was still carrying his silver bell around, a family tradition and a luck charm, which he had given to lqr at some point (the man had felt touched by the action, he knew they were used by the jiang family and given to people they saw as close to them). But he also ended up carrying a jade token around Twin with the bell. He had seemed so honoured and overjoyed to be given one. 

When jc finally entered junior middle school, he was encouraged by lqr to join the swimming club. He had heard how much the boy like to swim. Of course, this had caused some ruckus at home, especially from yzy, but jc had promised this would not affect his grades and showed just that. 

Jc’s junior and senior middle school years were where his habits started to lean a bit more towards the lans one, seeing how often he was over. He had pretty much given up on getting any of his father's affection, where most of his interaction with his mother (when she was not away for work, probably to stay away from jfm) was about his grades and how he should be doing better. Jyl was often with her fiance, so she couldn’t be around as much as before. His relationship with wwx had become a bit strained, but less because of wwx action, but because of how much he was always pitted against him for everything. 

He was instead finding all his acceptance and love over at lqr house, where the man would support him in his studies and help him out the same way he would do for his nephew (at some point some wondered if the man had adopted a son). If he was ever in trouble, he /knew/ the man would be ready to come to his acceptance and love over at lqr house, where the man would support him in his studies and help him out the same way he would do for his nephew (at some point some wondered if the man had adopted a son). If he was ever in trouble, he /knew/ the man would be ready to come pick him up, even if it was late. 

It is also probably why it was no surprise when jc came out to lqr first (or at least admitted not being sure if he was really as straight as he had always thought). Lqr was really accepting and jc had nearly felt like this was not the first time he ever had this conversation. But it was comforting to know someone who knew about it now and was accepting of it. 

Before they knew it, graduation came and the jiang family realise just how far they had drifted from jc, who seemed closer to lxc and lqr who were there than either of his parents. Since when was their son this smiling and bright? Where had all this confidence come from? 

The connection with his parent became a bit more strained when he affirmed, he was not going to study in yunmeng what they wanted him to do (so he could take over the company), but rather something he found much more interesting back in gusu. The only one who seemed genuinely happy about his choice was wwx, who said he was happy to hear jc was also going to be studying at gusu with him (which left jfm with no actual heir for his company other than jyl). 

Of course, the reaction was absolutely different over at the lan household, lqr was more than happy to hear he had been accepted at gusu college, and both lwj and lxc suggested going out to celebrate it. Jc had found another family and his parents were now too late to the game. 

(a little + is if wwx and jc manage to rebuild a better relationship, this time with no one to put them in some kind of invisible competition between them)

Original

[al-chemystic]

vent

is this something? is this anything? am i the fucking stupid one? a real bleeding heart, too young and inexperienced and stupid to know that i was supposed to let society beat the hope out of me already like a "rational, logical person?"

i gave up halfway throughout this text. i don't think i have the energy to finish it. i don't think i can be normal with him until i feel seen and heard. i don't think i can feel seen and heard until i finish and send this text. you're going to see me get frustrated at that paradox. i am not trying to pass this off as a complete and coherent statement, but i need to find somebody who understands what i'm getting at so i don't feel fucking crazy.

hey man, i have some things i can't get off my mind.

i don't try to have these discussions with you to start fights or try to make you believe exactly the same things i do. i do it because as someone who has grown up in and directly experienced ableism my entire life, there are a lot of basic, "societal principals" that i can now recognize are rooted in ableism.

first is the idea that human worth is intrinsically tied to the amount of labor one can perform. this is the driving idea behind not wanting to give livable funds to people who cannot maintain that themselves. arguments are made along the lines of "if nobody is doing labor and keeping our society going, it will fall apart." this causes a mass societal inference that anyone who cannot work is not essential to society (society and capitalism are inseparable to most). if you don't think someone is essential for society, you won't care if they have food, water, or shelter, especially not with all the caring you're doing for your own situation. it's so bad that in some circles, ideas like this are stated just as explicitly as i have said them: if you don't work you don't deserve money. you can't survive on your own without money.

that sustainability argument treats the situation as if we're asking for the cessation of all labor, for the government to hand everyone infinite money, and to spawn products out of thin air. at best, this is a thoughtless overcorrection of the problem, and at worst, a purposeful attempt to shut down any questioning of how the lower class is treated in this country by inflating the outcome as something nobody wants. it's important to remember that nobody is asking for that; that is clearly unsustainable.

while the unsustainability argument is a frontline tactic used to stop the asking of questions, the idea that labor = worth is what keeps the answers to the questions that do get through palatable to our capitalist society.

when people are kept in stress, they will get exhausted over time and jaded and nihilistic-- something you clearly recognize. the easiest way to do this is to keep people in financial stress. it is actively happening to you. you are worried about tax increases and not being able to afford to get the house you want. that's not a naturally occurring process.

society is manufactured. it was set up to put you in this situation. when you say things like "that's just how the world is," what you're actually saying is "that's just how the world started, and we're in too deep now to do anything about it."

because it's not like putting water on a grease fire. the way of society is not an unobjectionable fact of the universe based on how the physical world interacts. this is "just how the world is" because humans made it this way. so if humans designed it full of struggle, and if we are on this earth purely as an accident of nature and there is no universal meaning of life, then there is absolutely nothing else that matters more than making the world a better place. there simply is no higher purpose to wait through the struggling for. another prominent function of religion is distracting people during their lifetime so they feel like they're not suffering for no reason, which keeps them from asking for the suffering to stop.

what you're worried about isn't a hurricane that nobody caused and nobody can stop. you're afraid of an indirect threat. you already lose so much to taxes that all they have to do now is threaten to make you lose more, and you (the general "you") will pick the option or belief system that they did not correlate with you losing money. it's manufactured struggle, and it can be stopped.

so running it back, an argument might be

"we can't expand state income accessibility because then nobody will work and society will collapse." there's a silent "as we know it" hidden in there that nobody ever says, because the idea that society can be any different than what we made it has to be stamped out for rich lobbyists to maintain power.

society as we know it will undoubtedly change. again.. look around at all the manufactured financial stress. it has to change.

that quoted argument can only be said without cognitive dissonaance from someone who holds these beliefs:

- capitalist society is the only good society (this keeps lobbyists in power)

- your work is tied to your labor ability (thinking anything else puts you in a position to question capitalism, which threatens current powers. this also takes advantage of peoples' sense of purpose; they have to work themselves ragged to stay afloat, but at least they feel like they're contributing to the society that's hurting them. the idea that anyone isn't working 40+hrs a week and might be able to eat dinner in a house despite that fact immediately sets them on fire, by design, because they have to kill themselves to achieve that)

- increasing aid for others means that the government has to take something from me (while they keep you in such a bad position that you can't afford to lose anything else, instead of a proper distribution of billionaire lobbyists' wealth that could end homelessness in America)

- i dont know ive been writing for two hours and i want to throw up here's my other notes from even earlier:

it's amazing that you can point out why people are suffering and they still will not forsake the systems that keep them in suffering.

you recognize that our government keeps us in stress over our stability on purpose, to keep us distracted. you recognize that the two-party system is the definition of divide and conquer, and is another distraction that's also designed to pit people against each other. it actually blows my mind how you can hold both of those ideas in your head and then turn around and say "anymore i just have to do what makes my life easier for me." without realizing that the decisions you're making-- or not making-- to achieve or maintain that ease steps on other people.

okay, voting for trump will lower your taxes since you're better off than the average american. awesome. do you know what a second trump presidency will do to everyone else? to disabled people? to queer people, of which you are? to people of color? to women? to children?

nobody is saying your vote will fix everything overnight. nobody is saying your voice will make an immediate change in your surrounding community and drop a house in a struggling person's hands.

but choosing to favor policies that benefits you at the cost of others is ACTIVELY DECIDING to endanger other communities because god damn you just want that tax break. a tax break you need because you're fed up with taxes that are increasing "due to inflation." you mean... the manufactured inflation designed to keep you under stress so that you're too tired to care about others?

so it's okay for YOU to get tired? you're allowed to decide that nothing's changing so it's time to stop fighting, but GOD FORBID a homeless person experience that same emotional plight because then they're "doing it to themselves."

NEW NOTES:

i don't think you're wrong for being tired. i don't think you're wrong for wanting your own happiness and your own comfort. i think you're wrong for being unable to apply that to other people.

if the only people fighting for the relief and-- god forbid-- the COMFORT of disabled people are the disabled people, and YOU AS AN ABLE BODIED PERSON CANNOT STOP YOURSELF FROM GETTING BURNT OUT FIGHTING A SYSTEM THAT WON'T CHANGE, HOW THE HELL CAN YOU SIT THERE AND SAY THAT THE DISABLED PEOPLE WHO EXPERIENCE THE SAME BURN OUT IN TRYING TO GET OUT OF HOMELESSNES ARE JUST LAZY AND COMPLACENT. YOU'RE LITERALLY SAYING HEY KID GO FIGHT YOUR OWN BATTLES TO SOMEONE WHO'S 4'2" WHEN THEIR OPPONENT IS 6'4". YOU SEE A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HITTING A DISABLED CHILD AND HITTING A REGULAR CHILD BUT WHEN IT COMES TO FIGHTING FOR RIGHTS YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES AND PRETEND WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO DO IT ALL ALONE? YOUR VIEW OF DISABLED COMPETENCE IS COMPLETELY DEPENDENT ON WHAT SERVES YOU BEST, YET WHEN A DISABLED PERSON EXPERIENCES AMBIVALENT ABILITY, THEY'RE FAKING IT?

"oh if my grandpa didn't spank me id be a horrible person today" you were verbally abused. you acted out as a kid because your life sucked and your needs weren't met. people train dogs with more care for their basic needs than they raise a child. if a child is acting out they're missing a need.

the belief that those who achieve any level of relief to their suffering will get greedy and "always want more" is the exact thing they said to stop people of color from getting rights. to stop women from getting rights. to stop gay people from getting rights. to stop trans people from getting rights. and it's used to stop disabled people from getting rights. how is that last one different and acceptable? (it's not)

you're saying things that don't align with my core values, and then acting like if someone decides to step away from a relationship for those reasons that it's not right and they must've never really cared to begin with. you're asking people to sacrifice their belief systems for you. i can already hear you arguing that i'm doing the same, but i'm not demanding that you change your mind nor am i demanding that you sacrifice standing up for what you believe just to stay friends with me. if i believed murder wasn't wrong and that belief caused you to want to distance yourself from me, you would not be a bad person for choosing not to invest your time and energy into someone who believes something that so vehemently opposes your own core values (murder is wrong). i believe hitting a child is wrong regardless. i believe disabled people aren't just lazy. i believe all life has intrinsic value just by the sheer irrefutable fact that it is alive on this planet. you do not share these four beliefs whose opposing ideas-- which you do hold-- directly affect my life negatively. i don't have anybody in my immediate life who does agree with me and understand where i'm coming from. i don't get to choose my family. i get to choose my friends. it would not be wrong for me to decide against subjecting myself to people who hold the same ideas that beat me down everyday.

"just get over it you have to find your own happiness you don't have to justify yourself to anyone blah blah blah. buuuuut also justify yourself to a govt who doesn't care how you can't maintain a job and do it more frequently than you already do because people are abusing the system already so we have to restrict it more. thanks!"

how can you recognize that the generation that thinks the younger generations are all lazy and entitled are falling victim to the same "WELL WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T DO IT; I DID IT AND I DIDN'T LIKE IT BUT I HAD TO. NOW YOU'RE JUST BEING LAZY; YOU JUST DON'T WANT TO WORK ENOUGH TO AFFORD A HOUSE." no, houses are getting more expensive and the disparity between income and cost of living has increased exponentially. it's plain harder, and people are tired.

then all those tired people see disabled people who can't even struggle through a job the same way able bodied people are, and they look behind them at all the boomers calling them lazy, and they go "I'M lazy? well at least i'm doing it; those people do NOTHING and get money for it!!!!!" it's manufactured hatred over manufactured struggle.

i don't know if i can keep subjecting myself to the harsh reality that nobody fucking cares about disabled people and nobody ever will just for the sake of keeping one friend who i don't get to be real with. it's not like i can just end this and go find anyone and they'll probably agree with me. this hatred is baked into everyone; even disabled people. they're just the most likely candidates for breaking free from it.

if the only people in my life are people who keep proving to me nobody cares about my comfort and wellbeing, what's the point of having them?

[linaket]

Monthly Writing Update (February)

A slow January led to... a crazy quick February. I can't even believe its over, and I definitely dragged in my writing this month. Honestly, even sitting here all I have is a vague sense of what even happened this month.

I was promoted at work right at the beginning of the month, and spent a lot of time stressing over the drama and dynamics around that change this month. It even changed my shift schedule. I was working four days a week, ten hour shifts, and able to set aside an entire day for writing a week. My new position doesn't allow for that schedule, but while this is the first week in about two years that I'm back to working 5 days a week (and... six in a row on the first week) I spent most of my days off this month once again getting the house in order, and just being a general nervous mess about things...

Books Read

Untethered Sky by Fonda Lee

Jade City and Jade War by Fonda Lee (guess it was a Fonda kinda month?)

Hell Followed With Us by Andrew Joseph White

Four books at least meets the minimum of my (kinda unofficial) reading goal, even though I was pretty lucky this was a leap month because I only just finished Jade War today.

While I'm quite enjoying the Green Bone Saga, I've found something about it doesn't connect with me on a personal level, as a reader. Perhaps it is the POV that it is written in, but I am not getting the emotional connection that I often crave with books that truly sit with me. I'm absolutely going to finish it, and recommend it for anyone who wants to write epic fantasy. But I do think every book can teach a writer something new, and what I've been learning from this one is that I want to be more aware of the emotional stakes of my characters, and making that aspect more active in the narrative.

That being said, Untethered Sky? knocked it out of the park. Likely due in part to it being a novella, so everything was far more condensed. But 12/10 either way.

Writing Accomplishments

Honestly I am fighting the failure feeling just trying to type up this paragraph... basically, I tried to work on the extra for Shadow's Prey but ended up dropping it. I will likely still be aiming to release the ebook, but it will probably just be a very quiet release. It's mostly done and edited, but I don't think I'll be able to include an extra like originally intended. I started working on something, and MT kept singing its siren song and distracting me.

Also, I got art of the boys now! I'm excited to share it, and make some fun things for them.

That said, I did at least manage to finish something...

Favorite Excerpt

Valor told himself that it was better, that Ruse’s consistent prattling and teasing was an irritating distraction. But he couldn’t stop looking over at him. Though Ruse squinted against the brightness of the sun, the gaudy sunglasses hung on the collar of his shirt, stretching the already worn fabric. The bruises on his neck from the confrontation in Petra had faded over the last few days, gone from deep purple to a mottled yellow along the pale column of his throat. It was better that Ruse had gotten quiet. Better that he kept his gaze away, that he wouldn’t look at Valor. Every minute, every moment that Ruse didn’t look at him, didn’t focus his depthless attention on Valor, didn’t say anything, didn’t make a sound, was better because it meant that Valor didn’t have to think about what his hair would feel like between his fingers, what his throat would taste like under his lips. He could ignore the fact that he wanted to drown in Ruse, press his mouth against him and never come up for air. Valor tightened his grip on the steering wheel and went over the plan. Take Ruse into the Graves, retrieve the part for Jarl Nero’s scryer, and trade for information on the location of Noble Marek.  Then he’d find his father, and he’d kill his father. 

On Loop

Abe Parker - it is what it is

You're walking on the water that I'm drowning in Thought I heard a whisper, was it just the wind again Or the trail of blood I'm following? And if I'm the one to blame I guess all that I could say It is, it is, it is what it is All the things I couldn't change I lay with someone else's sins Let my soul just fly away All the way up to Heaven's light I pound those gates with no reply

Final Thoughts

I wish I had done more, and I also wish I could stop being hard on myself about this. It's no good. I am not nearly as hard on myself for not doing what I thought I should as I used to, but that's something really hard to shake, even if it doesn't help anything.

That said, it was a bit of a tough and strange month for me. I felt like I was dragging myself through each day, even dragging myself through reading. And while I did manage to at least finish some writing, I simply did not have the energy for anything more.

Hoping that I get used to this new schedule quickly. My work days feel much shorter now, since I'm used to the longer ones, and I've had more energy after. Also the position I took, while it was a promotion, is less stressful than the one I've been working. At least, so far. We'll see how the month shapes up. I am always far more productive, writing and other things wise, when I'm not carrying the work stress around, so. I'm hoping for the best here.

March Goals

Read 4 books again, and I've got a pretty good idea of what they'll be and excited about it, so at least I won't get struck by some kind of decision paralysis with that.

Release Shadow's Prey: Act 1 ebook! Yeah, it's still on goal for next month, despite that I wish I had it completely ready now. Really, its just final touches and me figuring out some of the technical details that need to be done. And like I said before, it'll probably be a very quiet release. I'll probably make a few posts about it after its up, but mostly its just to get it out there. I'm not really promoting the heck out of this one because, well... it's already tested with audiences. Probably the wrong audience, but it has been tested and it was difficult to get interest/attention, which is a fault of mine. I am NOT GREAT at marketing. And while I'm very happy with and proud of it, I know the work I'll have to do to really draw an audience to it. Especially considering the... not good at marketing thing. I have been researching and keeping an eye out for ideas and being practical about what it takes and what to do, but the task itself takes a lot of energy from me and I simply can't do that in time for a release. But I'm tired of simply sitting on all these books and doing nothing with them.

For Mortal Teeth, I need to finish the next arc. It's actually only two more chapters. This is a bit of a low goal, but I want to make sure I set something that I know I can do without feeling awful. Especially since these were supposed to be done last month.

Maybe a stretch goal of releasing character intros/aesthetics for the MT boys?