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#jane does: 100 followers
sean-kuraly · 2 years
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Congrats on 100! If you would, could you do an Instagram edit with Nick Blankenburg (your choice of topic!) please and thank you?
Congrats again! 🎉❤️
celebrating nick getting his first nhl goal below <3
itsy/n
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liked by nblanks98, umichhockey, bluejacketsnhl and others
itsy/n so proud of my boy for getting his first ever nhl goal tonight!!! i'm so grateful that you've allowed me to be here with you on this journey💞 i'm so proud of you and i love you endlessly 💖
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umichhockey oh captain my captain!
nblanks98 thank you so much for always being there to cheer me on, i love you sweet girl 💕
↪ itsy/n i love you more baby!!! so proud of you for tonight 😚
↪ brendan.brisson mom and dad
kentjohnson.13 he only plays this good when you're here!
↪ thombordeleau_ we always knew mom was his main motivator🙄
bluejacketsnhl it looks like we finally found blanks good luck charm!
nblanks98
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liked by itsy/n, lhughes_06, boonejenner and others
nblanks98 i'm so excited that you were here for my first goal and that you'll be there for every single one after, i couldn't have done any of this without you y/n, thank you for agreeing to be there for every goal for the rest of our lives 💕
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itsy/n i never thought you'd pop the question in the tunnel post game but i'm so glad you did! always and forever baby, i love you 💖
↪ nblanks98 i'd been waiting for the perfect moment and this was it!
boonejenner congrats to the newest bluejacket!
am.merzlikins we're so excited for you and y/n!!! already planning with all the wags 💞💞💞
↪ itsy/n i'm so excited to finally be an official member of the blue jackets wag club!!!!
markestapa OH MY GOD GUYS MOM AND DAD ARE GETTING MARRIED
↪ mackie.samo FINALLY
↪jimmy.lambert they've basically been married the past two years
brendan.brission oh god does this mean siblings are next...
↪nblanks98 😉
↪edwards.73 WERE GETTING REPLACED
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goryhorroor · 1 year
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horror • favorite supernatural/paranormal horror movies
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stcassiancorpse · 1 year
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The Cyclone Roller Coaster Tragedy
Disclaimer!!: Everything I say in this essay is purely speculation and theorizing. This is simply my interpretation of how the events may have unfolded. You may also notice that i wrote as if i were an investigator on the case. This is cause I was in a silly goofy mood. I also used little to no science to back up my theory, cause that got very boring very quickly, and I am writing this for fun. Without further Ado, enjoy.
       ��  On September 14, at 6:17 pm, six teenagers in Uranium City, Saskatchewan boarded the Cyclone, a thrilling roller coaster. At 6:19 pm, they were derailed from the apex of the loop, meeting their bitter ends. Who could have known that the the front axle would break when it did? Who could have known the children’s injuries would be fatal? I aim to find out,
          First I’d like to discuss the coaster itself. The Cyclone coaster was a coaster of wooden construction, similar to many other coasters of the era (many of which are also named ‘The Cyclone’). Normally wooden coasters, especially ones of old age, do not contain loops. It is nearly physically impossible, in fact. But lo and behold, this fair found a a way. Seen only once before on the Son Of Beast coaster at King’s Island, this coaster had a steel framed vertical loop inserted into it’s structure. Due in part to the original track’s age, and in part because of the quickness with which this cash-grabbing loop was constructed, it could not have been terribly stable.
          Another part of the coaster worth examining is the cart, as that contains the part that ultimately caused these victim’s untimely demise. The Cyclone’s carriage is made up of two parts joined in the middle. Each section seats six people with three rows of two. The St. Cassian Choir sat in the front of these two carts, leaving the other completely empty. The vehicle derailed itself at the apex of the aforementioned loop after the front axle broke. Given the timing of this break, coupled with the quality of this loop insertion, it is my belief that the hardware for the carriage was worn down each time it switched from wood to steel.
          Onto the victims.
          It’s important for us to note the order in which the victims were seated, as their positions at the time of the derailment would affect the trajectory of their fall and their injuries sustained. From left to right in each row, front to back; Constance Blackwood and Ocean O’Connell Rosenburg, Noel Gruber and MIscha Bachinski, and Ricky Potts. The final victim, known as Jane Doe, was decapitated during the accident, and so her identity remains unknown. Each victim is understood to be of average weight and height, with the exception of Ricky. Potts suffered from a rare degenerative disease that greatly affected his size.
          Ocean O’Connell Rosenburg, seated in the front right-hand seat, was said to be the most apprehensive about boarding the ride according to witnesses. Luckily for her, she received minimal injuries, despite the unfortunate condition of death. Since she was sitting in the front row she would have been experiencing less g-force than those in the back rows, and wouldn’t have hit the surrounding track with as much velocity. Its likely she fell almost straight down, hitting the track below. I theorize she was struck in the torso (the largest part of the body), and most likely broke a few ribs, experiencing lung puncture and cardiac seizure, possibly as well as a broken spine. All of these injuries compounded would have led to a near immediate death. This means she experienced minimal pain in the moments before her death, but most likely still experienced great amounts of shock and fear. 
          Constance Blackwood, sitting to Ocean’s left, sustained injuries similar too, but not exactly like, Ms. Rosenburg. Because she would have been slightly to the left of Ocean, I believe she also would have been slightly off center to the track. She may have hit one part of the track first, breaking a limb or two, before hitting a second part of the track and sustaining further injuries. Ultimately, she too would suffer cardiac seizure, as it is the most common cause of death from falling. She was heard laughing as she fell. 
         Those in the second row would experience slightly worse injuries than those in the front. They would be experiencing more g’s as they were propelled from the ride. Mischa, sitting directly behind Ocean, would have almost entirely bypassed the track. Keyword, almost. Mischa would have hit the track, sustaining a massive head trauma and possibly a broken neck, before landing on the ground beside the coaster. While you would think a head trauma would kill him instantaneously, he would have been alive and alert for at least a little bit before succumbing. He probably wouldn’t have been able to move, both from deficits due to brain injuries and shock. 
         Noel Gruber, the most romantic boy in town, his violent delights had a violent end. We’ll keep it short and simple; Noel had direct impact with the track, but flipped midair. His legs absorbed the impact, breaking immediately. The bones punctured his torso and shredded his organs.
        Ricky Potts was sitting behind Noel Gruber, the right hand side of the cart. Ricky would have experienced some of the absolute worst injuries, for many different reasons. First, Ricky is in the back row. He would be experiencing the most g-force, flung with the most velocity from the vehicle. Secondly, Ricky has a rare degenerative bone disease. He would be smaller than the rest, and much more fragile. Ricky flew the farthest, the hardest, and didn’t have the bones to withstand that kind of force. He flew past the loop, straight towards the ground, where nearly every bone in his body was broken. He may have experienced internal bleeding, brain swelling and bleeding, and any plethora of cardiac issues compounded by his condition.
         The sixth victim experienced the worst injury of all. Complete and total decapitation. Her head was never recovered. Not much is known about her, as we were unable to identify her. She was sitting next to Potts and behind Bachinski. She flew with a similar trajectory to Mr. Potts, but collided with the loop rather than passing it by. It is believed she struck a support just so that it tore her head from her body, possibly destroying the head in the process.
         At 6:17 pm on September 14, a small chamber choir from a local catholic school boarded a roller coaster. They expected a thrilling ride, but got far more than they bargained for. Perhaps we may never know exactly why the coaster broke, or how exactly the children died. What we do know is that a terrible tragedy befell a small town, and the best we can do is try to comfort them with the little knowledge we have.
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sluggmuffin · 1 year
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Oohoohooheeheehoo hi me again !!
Maybe either 🎪 or 🫧 Jane and Constance being the bestest friends, maybe something like constance brushing Janes hair
🫧 - send me a character and a scenario or your headcanons about that character and i'll make a moodboard out of it!
OKAY SO THIS IS SLIGHTLY CREEPY, BUT NOT REALLY (ITS THE MOODBOARD BTW)
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I ORIGINALLY WAS GONNA DO THE ART BUT I WANTED TO GET THRU THESE QUICK AND I HAVENT BEEN HOME FROM SCHOOL IN FOREVER 🫶🫶
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Doctor Who wilderness years tumblr simulator
👤 theother-deactivated
Can't stand this toxic ass account anymore. I'll have to make a new blog
👨‍🎓 thetasigma follow
Everyone come follow me over here
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🚬 fitz-kreiner
I'm sick and tired of the lack of nuance on this website! Having a dream about your mate where he's naked and your butts touch and generally thinking about having sex with him all the time does not make you queer!!
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🦋 eighth-doctor
I can't stand faction paradox. I bet their leader is a nasty ugly bitch
👴 grandfather-paradox follow
I bet you feel silly right now
📖 lawrence-miles follow
Everyone forget this happened
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👨‍🔬 third-doctor
My weed guy: this one is called Dust, youll be zonked out of your gourd
Me: yea yea whatever
2h later: the tardis walls are bleeding human blood. some weird guy here is psychosexually obsessed with me
6h later: A tear Sarah-Jane? No, wait a moment-
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Because you like #doctorwho
🙎‍♂️ the-stranger follow
Hi guys welcome to my new account. I'm just a traveller who tries to help people around the galaxy with my friend : )
🙎‍♂️ the-stranger follow
Turns out I was wrong about that. Here's an essay on why terrorism is necessary and okay
Read more
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🕰️ minister-of-chance follow
"aren't you tired of being nice? Don't you just wanna go apeshit?" no, actually, there are severe consequences to this type of thinking. We must always be aware of our higher responsibilities and act accordingly
🕰️ minister-of-chance follow
Nvm.
5K notes
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🖼️ the-real-isaac-greatorex follow
Everyone here is just hating on me because I'm gay. Tying people up killing them and drinking their blood is my hyperfixation
🪨 lez-shaw
Get P.r.o.B.e.d idiot
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🦋 eighth-doctor
To be honest I sometimes feel like I might benefit from some love and romance
🚃 realwildthyme
Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy doctor 💁‍♀️💖
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⛏️ benny-summerfield
Just one good day. Can I just have one normal day around here
💸 braxiatel follow
No
☂️ seventh-doctor
Afrrrrraid not
🦑 random-grel follow
Bad Fact: no. Die.
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👥 og-chris-cwej follow
Apparently I'm going under cover as an Australian. What's a good Australian name? I'm just gonna go with Bruce
✈️ tegan-jovanka follow
I swear to fucking god you gay little cunt
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🌱 sam-jones
Let's play never have I ever. I'll start. Never have I ever killed someone
🦋 eighth-doctor
I think this game sucks
📺 compassion5 follow
Obviously
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prettyboypistol · 6 months
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I'm not sure if requests are open so if not feel free to delete this ask! Can you do the mercs realizing they're into men because of the reader?
Of course! By the way, this is my 100th post! lucky lucky Anon! This goes out to all of the rest of my followers! Thank you for all the support and followers! I'll always look at your messages and write for TF2! I couldn't be here without all of you! Thank you for letting me be the weird gay man who likes writing about old gay men kissing! -PrinceThomas :>
Tf2 Mercs x M!Reader || Gay Awakening! +18
Scout
Super in denial at first, compares you to actors he likes or thinks are hot and kinda shelves it. Is MAD jealous that you just somehow look great no matter what (to him hehe)
Realizes he has a crush on you when his usual spank bank material of girls isn't really doing it for him anymore. It's 4am, he's tired and horny and a little drunk... his mind just wandered, okay?!
Daydreamer 100%, but his feelings for you and his feelings for Miss Pauling kinda fuck him up ngl?? Is he a homo or not?? I mean, he likes boobs and lipstick and girls, but the rough and tumbled grease in your stubble just gets him rarin in a way girls didn't.
Bisexual struggles fr. Assuming that you're a Stonewall riot supporter, he'd probably try to roundabout ask if he can experiment with you.
What really set you apart from the other mercs is that you just look good compared to them! Yeah, there are some conventionally attractive guys, but you're h o t.
Soldier
Soldier, like Scout, assumed his attraction to you was something more akin to respect or friendliness. I mean, no other soldier he's ever met sacrificed himself to save him! That takes guts! Yeah, you respawned after, but the honor was still there for him.
Develops or at least tries to develop a friendship like what he with Demoman. He might come off like a very determined puppy, but you know he means well.
Uses you as someone to compare others too. (Ex. "SCOUT! THAT WAS HORRENDOUS TECHNIQUE! TAKE A LOOK AT THAT FINE MAN OVER THERE! DETERMINED! STRONG! TAKE NOTES, PRINCESS!")
When he does realize it's love, he is upfront and honest about his feelings with you. After all, if Jane did like men, he could find more powerful army and recreate that unbeatable ancient army of homosexuals!
Asks around about romance, probably interrogates Medic about how to court another man because let's be honest Medic looks gay as he'll and I will die on the hill that every merc just assumes that man is queer.
Pyro
In Pyroland, you're a prince on a unicorn. You're straight out of a fairy tale. They're overjoyed to have a prince in Pyroland rather than just babies! Yeah, it's fun to be childish, but a whimsical joy that are more complex are fun too!
Absolutely follows you around and talks about you to Engie non-stop. Engie jokes that Pyro might have a crush on you and they seriously consider it. They realize you're attractive when you do a party trick of spitting out Bug spray and lighting it on fire, making it look like you breathe fire.
As you cough and retch at the lingering taste of bug repellant in your mouth, Pyro applauds your trick and keeps trying to talk to you. They eventually are able to communicate to you, asking if you have any more fire tricks. You show them that you can twirl a pencil between all your fingers when the eraser tip is lit up like a candle.
You can kind of tell that they like you romantically, but you're not sure how to tell them that you know. A few chats with Engie tells you all you need to know: Pyro has never pursued a romantic interest, Pyro likes you, and that you can probably get their attention with an honest conversation.
Demoman
The most casual about their realization that they like you- and men in general. Just a peek at you in the showers after a particularly clutch victory caused a few rather dirty thoughts. It wasn't that big of a deal to him and kept his attitude of a drunken "Well, a hole's a hole, I bet he's tight."
Probably offers a little bit of fun after a long night of party, definitely a lot more drunk than usual as he leans a tad too close for friendship. That deep, gravelly, and warm voice growled in your ear with an open offer to join him in his room that night.
If you joined, he wouldn't remember the night and regret that he forgot the night in the morning when you and him snuggle awake. If you decline it's no harm no foul.
One of those types of guys who actually can balance his feelings for you along with his friendship- he keeps the ball in your court and stayed professionally friendly, maybe a tad brotherly competitive.
Heavy
This man is an iron wall to hide his feelings. He had the idea that he just wasn't the type to want a relationship- which was fine, more time to work to keep his family safe- but then you jumped out into danger to protect him. He was on the brink of death and you selflessly risked your life for him! Yeah, you both respawned, but it was the gesture that mattered!
His eyes trailed you a lot more often, like a security camera. He pretended to be read his book, but he knew exactly where you were. Medic is the first to notice this change.
Medic asks about Heavy's feelings for you, since Heavy had never ordered Medic to go heal anyone else before! Hell, the both of you tended to stay behind Heavy during battles after that, so you two had a sense of closeness.
When you all went out on a trip to the beach, Heavy loved watching you in the water, and even allowed himself to be dragged in by you to play water polo with Soldier and Demoman. He's a long game of chess, hopefully you can win him over!
Is a bit more protective of you out of battle, but that's something only the people he threatens is aware of.
Engie
Oh fucking god holy shit what the hell man's fucking gay PANICS. DELL IS HEARTSTOPPINGLY FROZEN IN FEAR WHEN HE REALIZES THAT HE LIKES MEN.
All you did was scale a chainlink fence with ease, albeit with a small growling as the metal dug into your fingers. Dell swallowed the feeling thickly. He didn't mean to stare at your ass, really! It just sorta... happened.
And then it happened again as he kneeled to construct a sentry. Then when he was sat down at the kitchen table as you walked by. The only time he didn't catch a glance was when you turned to him with a smug look and a "if you wanna look at my ass, you could just ask."
He knows a lot of gay cowboy culture, but was far too scared to go ahead with a few of the gestures. Although, you weren't as shy, giving him a grey handkerchief when he spillied oil on himself.(translation: grey handkerchief=bondage kink)
Finally- FINALLY! He offers you his hat on a very hot day with his head looking straight at the ground.(translation: if a cowboy puts his hat on your head, y'all fucking)
Sniper
In the top 3 of "chillest reactions to realizing he likes men", but barely on the podium yk?
Mick was doing some target practice and had lost track of time, his pot of coffee and snack pile had been long empty. Right as he was about to get up to stretch his legs, he saw you on the last rung to the ladder of his nest. "Oh hey Snipes! You missed lunch and dinner, 'decided to check in on our favorite sharpshooter." When you stay for a few moments and hand him the bottles of water and leftovers from dinner, he realized that nobody made him feel that loved.
You just being kind sends him into a "did he do that to hit on me? Does he do this to everyone?" Yeah he panics about everything you do, but not because you're a man- it's because a crush is a crush to him!
Sniper does genuinely try to show interest, but in a subtle way like inviting you out to take a smoke break, target practice, maybe offer to let you join him to survivalist camp for a few days.
Spy
Silver medalist of the chill reaction podium, mainly because he laments to himself about all the potential money he had lost by not seducing more men in his more freelance espionage days. He could have hooked up with Saxton Hale to swindle that oaf out of millions- if he had thought of that.
Does a full background and thorough investigation into your personal life, how you reacted to the huge news event of Stonewall, if you had ever hooked up with a man, anything to see if he had a chance to sneak into your dating pool.
He treats you a lot like how he treats the women he seduces, but has to overcome how you brush him off casually like a man. Women were a language Spy speant years studying, so much so that he seldom kept up with the more masculine way of communicating.
At his wit's end, he just asks you bluntly. "Listen, I find you hot. I've been trying to get into your pants for almost 2 months now, do you want to have sex?"
Medic
This man already knew he was gay before you pulled up, sorry. BUT BUT BUT you are the first crush he's had! Yeah, he knew he liked the idealized version of a man he made up in his head, but you are better than the fictional men in books!
Despite the stereotype for Medic, he didn't fall for you when he saw you on his operating table. You and Engie were theorycrafting about hypothetical cybernetic enhancements. Engie had said something biologically inaccurate about the immune system, and before Medic could interrupt your private conversation, you corrected Engie! Not in a demeaning way, but in a way that clearly showed that you had a love for biological science. Medic's heart skipped a beat.
Constantly offering you new enhancements for your body and coddles you about painful proedures (he actually gives you anathesia! How sweet!) and sends his experimental ideas to you for a betaread over. For Medic, that's essentially a confession in and of itself!
Has written your name in little hearts on his note margins and uses you as his anatomy sketch references when he needs to visualize the human skeleton.
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Hi! I found your house of mouse au pretty recently and I am LIVING FOR IT. And I wanted to ask... How do you think Miss Yuu's interactions with Peter Pan's characters would be like. I'm dieing for seeing how she would get along with Peter, Wendy, Jane, the lost boys Captain Hook and the pirates
Alright so my Yuu is actually kind of a mix of Wendy Darling (sweet, motherly, mature yet innocent, protective, a pacifist that will get angry/annoyed when the situation calls for it, loves children, very imaginative with a love for stories, etc) and Snow White (a forest nymph that has animals flocking to her, angelic singing voice, enjoys baking and acts of service, loves to tease and will put her foot down if things aren't right/up to standard, forgiving, feminine, sees the good in everyone but understands danger, etc)
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So I see Wendy and Alice as like the quote-unquote 'leaders' of the younger Disney girls and those two definitely look up to Miss Yuu as an older sister. Since Wendy's mature for her age, she kind of sees Yuu as a sort of mentor(?) and has a lot of respect for her. The two of them especially love to tell stories to each other since they love fiction and magic and all that. She's not exactly part of the shipping war since she's so young and her idea of love is 'girl likes boy so girl kisses boy' but she is a huge romantic and does sigh happily whenever she sees Malleus act all prince-like with Yuu.
John and Michael (and the lost boys), like Wendy, look up to her as a big sister. she does entertain their adventurous spirit when she's with them and she cares for them deeply. The Darling brothers and their friends usually hang around with the other little boys though so she doesn't get much time with them - but they are 100% down to stand up for her if they see her in trouble.
I've answered an ask about Tink and Yuu's relationship before but to add on I think she was insanely jealous of the attention Yuu got from everyone else at first and then was hit by the Yuu charm after one (1) conversation with her where Yuu just gushed about her and praised her so know they're bffs.
Mr Smee dotes on her. Like Kronk and LeFou, he's a henchman that's not evil, he just cares for the villain. The pirates have accepted her as one of their own and since she loves hearing about their stories Hook and his men just love to hype themselves up. I don't really know what else to write.
Okay Peter, I think would first not like her because, well, girl. He does try to pull that whole 'girls talk too much', 'well, get on with it girl', 'wendy's enough' thing that he did with Wendy but Yuu was very quick to put a stop to it. He doesn't have any real strong feelings about her but he lives for chaos and chaos always follows her so he'll help her if it means causing annoyance to the villains/nrc boys.
Thanks for the ask ☺️
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thelunarfairy · 3 months
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Hey I LOVE your Yugi twins analysis post!! ( not because I like the toxicity/ incest I just think it’s a great analysis of tbhk) and I wanted to ask your opinion on a thing
Toilet Bound Hanako Kun as a series is a Gothic Romance
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I’ve been going insane about because I’m a huge fan of the genre
( some examples: Crimson Peak ( movie), Jane Eyre, Dracula, Rebecca ( novel and movie), The Fall of The House of Usher, etc)
and I’m 100% convinced by now but I need validation
agree or disagree?
Oh! Thank you!! I'm happy to know you liked it :3
Yeah, I don't like incestuous relationships either, but if it's in the story we have to analyze it.
I don't know if this helps you, but here in my country, this anime is within this genre. Even if elsewhere it does not have this classification, the story itself leads to this path.
"How is the Gothic novel characterized? The Gothic novel is an essentially hybrid manifestation, a link between the novelistic and the novel in which an atmosphere of mystery, affliction and terror prevails."
There's a strange duality to the relationships in this series. If I were to ask you if you could name me any JSHK romantic relationships that are TOTALLY HEALTHY, could you name them for me?
Mitsuba x Kou It's not canonically romantic yet, but even before it is, Kou is aggressive and demanding of Mitsuba, not to mention that he puts Mitsuba's wants above his own. Mitsuba, on the other hand, demonstrated a desire for "death together", which Kou tried to do without hesitation. A guy tried to take his own life for someone else, and Mitsuba wanted to trap him in the PP arch along with him.
Aoi x Aoi Akane is extremely possessive, aggressive, jealous and intolerant. When I say intolerant I am referring to anyone who has a romantic interest in Aoi. He doesn't give her the power of choice, he simply decided that she is his. Traces of an EXTREMELY abusive and DANGEROUS relationship, yes, imminent risk of death. Many REAL LIFE cases start like this. Aoi is jealous of Akane's popularity (in terms of friendships), and doesn't think twice before impaling him.
Hanako x Nene It follows a fine line between Aoi x Aoi, the difference is that Hanako is not aggressive, BUT, he is vengeful. We constantly see him punishing Nene when she shows interest in other guys. He makes decisions about her life alone without consulting her and without allowing her to choose what is best for her or not. He is jealous, possessive, insecure and needy. Hanako would be able to kill Nene if he believed it was the best option for her. I don't need to mention the PP arc or the number six arc. Nene is a girl who tends towards disrespect, she flirts with other guys in front of Hanako, even though she is about to enter into a relationship with him.
This is just a SUPERFICIAL summary of the three main ships in the series. They all seem to want to culminate in tragedy, something that fits into the gothic genre.
Besides of course, the relationship between the twins, a mysterious and dark relationship, you can't follow this relationship without thinking that there is "something strange"
If we compare, for example, the relationship between Edward Elric and Alphonse, we see here a healthy and common relationship between brothers, with its ups and downs and with great brotherly love between them. Remembering that Edward's entire journey is dedicated to his younger brother. Ed made a mistake in the past and his younger brother suffered a serious consequence, Ed took responsibility and promised to solve the problem. They are together almost all the time and yet you clearly see that it is a healthy relationship.
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Not in the case of twins. There's a strange ambiguity in what they consider "love", it doesn't feel like sibling love, and it's not ordinary love, it's something more obsessive, more… how can I say… suffocating? There's something I still can't see. It's not just "maybe it's incest" it's something more than that. Maybe one day I will be able to organize my ideas and think more clearly.
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So yes, JSHK fits into this genre, it fits into many other things in this genre too, I only focused on relationships because you talked about the twins' relationship.
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THE ELITE OF THE STREETS S1 EP 1 (A NEW SF REALITY SHOW PARODY SERIES)
THE ELITE OF THE STREETS
Cast:
Rashid and Luna
Cody Travers, Mayor of Metro City and Melanie Travers, First Lady of Metro City
Ken Masters and Krystal Matheson-Masters
Vega Fabio la Cerda and Stacie (Burgess) Fabio la Cerda
Roy Bromwell and Geneva Carmichael
Supporting Cast:
Mel Masters
Ryu and Victoria
Guile and Rowena
Charlie Nash and Sheila Nash
Season 1 Episode 1: Housewarming Party
*Vega and Stacie’s hill-top mansion*
*A man is seen in a well decorated office/studio. He has many portraits of himself, and two new mannequins are inside displaying the beginnings of his newest men’s collection*
*Of course, he has an assistant who does all of the work because number one, why do it when you can have people serving you like the good little servants they are, and number two, he can kill anyone who fucks up with a mere thought so…he just dictates what he wants and the assistant follows to the letter*
Vega: My name is Vega…Vega Fabio la Cerda to be exact and I am a former king of Shadaloo and bullfighter. My stunning good looks have always been overshadowed by the darker side of my personality. *Stares with a bit of a crazed stare before switching it off* I walked away from it all and decided to use my beauty and amazing sense of fashion to make millions off of convincing men that if they dressed in my fashions or attempted to look like me, that it would make them as handsome as me…it won’t.
Vega: That’s the exact shade of clue I’ve been looking for! This will definitely make this piece really accentuate the body of the unfortunate male trying hard to look as good as me! You’ve been doing great work lately, Jane.
Jane under her breath: I don’t have a fucking choice; I’m not trying to get clawed…
Vega: What was that?
Jane: Nothing, sir.
Vega: As long as you know your place. If you say anything else under your breathe in my presence, I will have a new shade od red to wait my walls with? Understood?
Jane: Y-Yes…yes sir.
Vega: Now, continue…
*The woman calms her shaky hands as she continues to work as Vega closely watches*
*The camera switches to a gorgeous brunette sitting at a vanity in a room full of white and gold furniture putting on her makeup wearing an expensive multi pattern dress*
Stacie: I’m Stacie Fabio la Cerda and I’m the wife of Vega. You may know me by my maiden name/stage name, Stacie Burgess. I am an Academy award winning actress and five of the last six movies I have been in have grossed over 100 million dollars at the box office and have been streamed over 120 million times on major streaming apps. Together, Vega and I are the proud parents of our daughter, Ximena, and the adoptive parents of my niece, Chelsea.
The girls are incredibly spoiled. They want for absolutely nothing and they have everything there is to have and more. It can be a problem sometimes though, sometimes I have to make sure they know that just because we have a lot of it, money doesn’t grow on trees still.
Ken and Krystal just moved into a brand new house. The rooms are bigger between their room, little bird’s room the guest rooms and the office spaces. It’s gorgeous no doubt. Tonight is their housewarming party and I’m making sure I get them some great gifts.
Stacie: Well, time to get my ass up time to go and go get some awesome housewarming gifts.
*Stacie grabs a white Yves Saint Laurent purse, descends the stairs and goes to a custom made revolving shoe closet and revolves twice before pulling out light tan Louboutin open toed heels and easily buckling them*
Ximena: Momma? You going out?
Stacie: Yes, I’m going to go get some gifts for the party later.
Chelsea: Can we come along, Auntie?
Ximena: Yeah, Dad’s threatening the staff again.
Stacie: Alright, come on girls, if he’s delegating his fashions, it’s best not to get in his way for a while.
*The eleven year old girls are well dressed*
*Ximena is wearing a navy blue lace sleeved dress and short metallic gold low chunky heeled sandals while Chelsea is wearing is one piece dress that’s red on top and black leather skirt with low black whing sandals with crystals*
*Yes, these three are styling and profiling all the way out of the estate and into Stacie’s pink Range Rover*
*She stops by a wine shop to buy an expensive bottle of Chateau. She stops and purchases an expensive Waterford vase; she places an order for flowers she’s going to pick up on the way to the party*
Stacie: Well, I finished that far ahead of schedule…what do you say girls, we have some time to kill. I think a little retail therapy will be a nice treat.
The girls: Yeah! Yes!
*The trio go and buy some new dresses for tonight’s party and take a little more time looking at the preview for the new fall and winter coats before heading back home*
*A custom built mansion in the corner of the wealthy residential gated community*
*A man is opening several boxes of shit he ordered…again*
*He smiles and giggles to himself gleefully as he lifts the brand new 5000+ dollar camera out of its packaging*
Rashid: Did ya miss me!? I’m Rashid of the Turbulent Wind! The Chaos King is back and better than ever! All the people who watched The Warrior Husbands of Street Fighter know who I am, but if you don’t know, I’m the most devilishly handsome guy to ever grace your tv screens and every device you own. I am a royal…but I don’t act like one at all, and I don’t actually care anymore because I am who I am. The best part of being one these days is most of the shit I do happens via internet connection so I am based here in Metro Coty with my family and all of my friends here!
My butler Azan is simply ageless and always up my ass about spending money, but I mostly pretend to not hear him at all. I actually have a purpose for this purchase. My twin boys, Amir and Malik are eleven now and they are a handful. My adopted daughter, Daniella, is twelve now. I feel good about giving her a good life, she’s precious to me and I am happy she is my daughter. I may have bought a few things for the kids too…and maybe the wife so she won’t bitch at me too much.
Luna: Papi, What the fuck did you order this time?
Rashid: New camera!
Luna: You just bought one three months ago…
Rashid: For once, this gift is for the housewarming party. I even ordered the gift bags and stuff for it. I bought a tripod to go with it that also works with smartphones.
Luna: At least you didn’t just make another mindless purchase.
Rashid: Well…
Luna: Rashid…
Rashid: I did buy the boys the new Ray-Ban sunglasses they wanted and I bought Daniella a new fur coat soooo…
Luna: She’s not wearing it to school though.
Rashid: And…I did upgrade your ring the other day. My lady needs a four carat monster on her finger.
Luna: This doesn’t change the fact that you spend too damn much sometimes, but I love you…*Kiss* Get this shit wrapped up, bagged up or whatever, I’m gonna wrangle the kids and get dressed. Don’t take too long.
Rashid: I won’t, my flower…that will bloom after dark.
Luna: Don’t make that joke again or I will make sure you don’t get any for the next week.
Rashid: Yes, dear.
Luna: Here we go again…My name is Luna and I’m the wife of Rashid of the Turbulent Wind. I’m a very successful event planner based in Metro City and I’ve had clients from all over the world, including the prestigious Karin Kanzuki, whom I still speak with regularly. I used to deal on the streets until my husband saved my life by believing in me. Now I live an incredible life in this beautiful home, with my little family.
Producer: Don’t you like the wealth it brought too?
Luna: I created my own wealth…I earned that.
*Rashid wraps and bags the gifts before going to get dressed. He may have gotten a little quickie in with his wife during this…heh…*
*Eventually he came out flashy as fuck with a black sequin top and leather pants and some expensive dress shoes. That Rolex on his wrist…wooo the COST*
*Luna is looking gorgeous in a long sleeved red Alexander McQueen bodycon dress and her favorite Louboutin black leather pumps*
*These kids think they are the shit, just looking stylish as hell. The boys are trying to be as cool as their father and the daughter has on a black shirt with a blue denim dress over it…and a damn Christian Dior purse*
*The family gets into the Mercedes convertible with the gift and head off*
*The mayor’s office*
* The blinds are closed as the occupants of the room are changing clothes inside*
Cody: Name’s Cody Travers. I’m the law around here in Metro City, been runnin it a few years now. I once fought to protect these streets before I became so obsessed with the thrill of battle that I ended up behind prison walls. Lost my girlfriend, and damn near lost my future. I broke out every other week to stave off my boredom and that’s when I met my wife. She accepted me as I am and I told her to wait until I became worthy of her, I got the chance of a lifetime to change my life. I became mayor and I am workin to continue improving the city along side her. I’m not an ordinary mayor, I still love to throw hands and still can with the best of em. Hey, I’m mayor…doesn’t mean I’m some straitlaced punk…
Melanie: I’m First Lady Melanie Travers, a former real estate agent. I married Cody completely unprepared for the job and role I would take on but I’ve been taking it in stride. My mother is African American of Sudanese descent and my father is Korean American, most people get confused by my chocolate skin when I tell them that. It’s kind of funny to be honest. We are the proud parents of an eleven year old daughter and ten year old son and we’re doing our best to be doting parents and civil servants, when Cody’s not trying to beat the shit out of city council…
Cody: He had it coming…
*The kids are outside, waiting in the office as the occupants emerged from the room dressed in party mode instead of work mode. These cheesy motherfuckers are both wearing royal blue…matchin and shit. Melanie’s knee length blue cami slip dress may or may not be expensive but those rhinestone Jimmy Choo heels are*
Cody: Alright…Heidi, Daniel. Head to the limo waiting, time to go. *The kids scamper off towards the elevator* Look at you lookin beautiful as ever.
Melanie: Thanks. Always for you, my love.
Cody: I needed this night anyway. Be with my friends, have a good time, and not be near Dave’s bitch ass again. He keeps trying to block helpful crime and infrastructure initiatives and it’s pissing me the fuck off.
Melanie: I know baby, you’re doing your best. As your wife, I’m ensuring your message gets across and isn’t forgotten because I want what’s best for the city too. I’m here to support you and the city.
Cody: I couldn’t have picked a better mate, y’know? *They share a sweet kiss*
Melanie: I’m glad you know that…now let’s go. I already have the gifts in the car.
Cody: Alright babe.
*The two meet their children at the elevator, descend down, and then get into the crisp, white limo and head towards Ken’s new home*
*Meanwhile, a handsome young blonde man is waiting for his live-in girlfriend to come out of the tattoo parlor, X-Factor Chic. She eventually does emerge in a black Gucci dress that’s not bodycon but not super flowy either and some matching black Gucci heels*
*She is followed out by her coworker, Nia, the Queen of Ink, who is wearing a very eyepopping pink bodycon dress. We’re talking titties served up, ass popping, and legs for days with those silver spiked rhinestone heels. Also, an increasingly horny Bosch is trying to keep the boner down, especially when their kids are there*
*Geneva walks up to her boyfriend and gives him a passionate kiss before they are told to get a room*
*She gets into his Nissan sports car, as the others also get in and then they journey to Ken’s house.*
Roy: I guess I’m the young gun around here. Name’s Roy Bromwell, and I’m a young city council member here in Metro City. Back in high school, I was a football star, and I went pro after school for two years before an injury sidelined me for good. I decided to get into politics because I learned a whole lot about helpin make a difference when I was an exchange student in Japan back in the day (like your ass is old…seriously).
When I attended Pacific High with my friends Boman, a preacher who is living in Japan spreading the Word, and Tiffany, who still wants my ass…students were being brainwashed and schools were being attacked. All the students had to band together to stop the threats not once, but twice. I decided to stay in my home country permanently this time. I’ve been dating Geneva Carmichael, a tattoo revision and removal specialist for a year, it’s just out in the open now. We live together, and I hope that she’ll let me put a ring on it soon.
*Cocky smile*
How do I know Ken? My family’s rich, his family’s rich…we’ve met, it was inevitable.
Roy: Glad to get away from buzzing needles, disinfectant, and crazy banter?
Geneva: Just a little, I love my job, but damn I need some fun every now and then so I don’t get burnt out.
Roy: I feel the same way about city council.
Geneva: Yeah, I can see how it could be that way. A lot of assholes who are 85+ and still won’t step down and spend their golden years actually making memories.
Roy: Exactly. This is why I love you.
*Geneva smiles*
Geneva: Hi. I’m Geneva Carmichael and I’m a tattoo removal and revision expert. Bring me your ugly ass amateur workout and I can make art out of it. I’ve been working at X-Factor Chic Tattoos and Piercings for about 3 years and I’ve gained a lot of wonderful friends and new experiences here. I’ve been able to meet and work with all different sorts of people. I never thought I’d date a man in politics, but in Metro City, straitlaced politicians aren’t as common as they are in the rest of the country, so it works out. That man spoils me more than any I’ve ever met, but the best thing I get to do is wake up in a California King Bed next to my hopefully soon to be fiancé.
*They eventually all come to Ken’s house, and upon seeing each other once they arrive outside, everyone greets each other warmly*
Geneva: Roy, don’t forget my gifts! A woman always needs new kitchen stuff in a new house.
*Once everyone comes in, they are actually greeted by Rowena, the second wife of Guile, a highly praised, awarded, and sought out photographer. Guile is inside and has the alcohol already straight*
*Once everyone arrives with their families, they greet the house’s occupants, Ken and Krystal*
Ken: I didn’t think I’d be back on tv after the producers as AnyaRayne Entertainment decided to give spinoffs of the original show due to cast sizing, but here we are. I never like going back over my history and what happened because I’ve moved on from it. Right now, I’m running my own construction company. As far as the foundation goes, it’s been passed on to my son, Mel. I’ve given him everything he needs to be able to redeem the foundation’s name, and I’m not attached to it any further than that.
I’m just focused on my business, my wife, and my daughter Adelaide. She’s eleven now, hardly can call her little anymore.
*Sighs in slight sadness*
Krystal: I’m Krystal Dalia Matheson-Masters and I’m married to my wonderful husband Ken, and we have one daughter together, Adelaide Vivian Masters, and I have a stepson, Mel. I’m a talent agent and I manage some of the biggest talent in every industry from the silver screen, to the tv screen. I even manage models and some musical acts. As a former model myself, I know what it takes to succeed in the world of fame. Family is everything to me. I love to cook and share a meal with family and friends, and I will fight just as hard for both in any sense of the word. I’m not to be played with for sure.
*Kareena and Issac arrive along with Deepa and E. Honda. Both bringing gifts themselves*
*Drinks begin to flow and with each gift opened upon arrival, appreciation is shared*
Adelaide: Hey everyone, you’ve just gotta see my new room! It’s so much bigger.
Yaya: Ooh I can’t wait to see.
Amir: No one cares about your room, little bird.
Sarai: Shut up, no one asked your opinion, dumbass.
*The kids go off with each other, showing off outfits and talking smack*
*Pretty soon, the girls go to the backyard where there is a really nice gazebo built there. The girls take their wine there to enjoy the nice evening air*
Rowena: This a very beautiful new house, you deserve of this for working so hard for it.
*Inside, the guys are happy to see Ryu show up to the party with Victoria and their 4 year old twins*
Krystal: Aww, thanks. *Takes a sip of wine* Well ladies, how’s business? Another up and coming actress has signed under my agency, so another notch in the belt of representation.
Victoria: Being a martial arts historian is hard, but my encyclopedia available in stores and online in both physical and digital versions are flying off the shelves with people being into the history itself of all of these unique and ancient arts, I’m happy about that. The problem is, it isn’t a stable career path so while Ryu is running a popular Soba shop in Chinatown, I’ll become a dental hygienist like I wanted originally.
Luna: Funny enough, it’s available in stores and online, but I have a collection of stationery and stuff for aspiring event planners, or those who just want to try their hand at planning their own event. Wedding planning notebook, sets of different lists like one for vendors and another for flowers to budget effectively, and even really nice binders and stuff. Of course, I’ve planned some pretty fancy events for some more international clients too.
Stacie: I just finished filming yet another in the trilogy of Enchantress Filomena, and am a regular on a soap opera about amorous medical professionals. Vega hates that role because no one should touch me like that BUT him. I keep strict boundaries though with any of my costars. They know either I will sue or my husband will leave no trace of them.
Kareena: I’m officially making more than I can count through my nail and makeup business. I can officially set my own schedule, period. I’m loving being able to do incredible artwork.
Nia: Just like me, I just do art on the body, and I have my own line of tattoo ink now and its pretty funny how people buy it because they feel they can do better artwork like me if they use it. I am almost embarrassed how people praise me sometimes.
Geneva: Don’t be, you’ve earned it. I want to be like you when I grow up. I’m just a woman who can remove and repair tattoos. Definitely nothing special like you all are.
Victoria: I’m hardly special, I just followed my passions and am establishing another career, all the things follow if we stay the course.
Geneva: Sure…talented women y’all are. I need a niche.
Sheila: A niche is overrated. You don’t need get rich or fame quick things.
Luna: About time you rolled in.
Sheila: Charlie took forever on his hair.
Geneva: What do you do for a living?
Sheila: I’m a scientist and biomedical engineer.
Geneva: And there’s my point.
Stacie: Keeping up with the Joneses is not good. Just stay true to yourself.
Melanie: Luna and I have been busy as hell too, lately. Always events to put on. The mayor’s ball in May, the Garden Party in March, and of course, the ball the week before Thanksgiving. It will be cold, but there won’t be snow for a while so get those furs out girls. The Black Tie Winter Wonderland gala. All proceeds from ticket sales will go to the cause of promoting education and job opportunities from gangs and from within prison.
*The women all agree to attend*
*Meanwhile inside, Ken is sharing beers and shots with the guys as Jamie, Luke, and Ed arrive with their families also in tow*
*Anya, Sarita, and Jaida go outside with the other women*
Cody: Congrats on the house man, it’s a much needed upgrade.
Ken: Thanks bud. I feel like I can breathe better in here. Plus, your wives really gave a lot of gifts. That makes me feel pretty awesome.
Ryu: We’re all friends here, there’s nothing none of us wouldn’t do for each other.
Jamie: Yeah, like risk our lives teaching your big lead foot ass how to drive.
*As everyone shares a laugh, Ryu glares at him*
Roy: I’m new to all this…kinda. I grew up with a silver spoon, but rubbin shoulders with some cool ass dudes doesn’t happen often.
Vega: Consider it your greatest privilege.
Luke: Or your greatest mistake.
Bosch: It’s a mistake you won’t regret.
Issac: I have never regretted it yet.
Rashid: We bring necessary chaos into everyone’s lives!
Mel: Let’s toast to my dad’s new house!!
Ken: Hey!! It’s good to see you son!
*The two hug before the toast is made as Jamie’s dad and Chun-Li arrive not far behind him. Li Fen is also with him*
Ryu: You’ve grown so much Mel.
Guile: I remember when you were born. It’s been a privilege to me to see you grow into a man.
Ken: Speaking of that…you and Li-Fen came together…
Jamie: I have seen you around Chinatown a lot lately…
Mel: I’m not talking about it.
Vega: Guilty.
Luke: They’re 100% bangin.
Mel: Shut up, Luke.
Rashid: Look at your face. You look like a tomato.
*Mel screams to the sounds to laughter*
Rowena: All the food is ready now y’all!
*Eliza and her new husband, Brock are the last to arrive*
*Everyone enjoys the appetizers that Rowena made and the party is lively*
*Stacie and Luna are back outside when they feel someone watching them, but brush it off*
*After a few long hours, the party goers gather their children and begin to disperse so they can return home*
*Once everyone is outside saying their goodbyes…*
Julia: You all thought this shit was over!? Look at you miserable drinking, smoking, farting ass degenerates! Rowena!!!! We’re due for another round you homely looking bitch. You cheap shotted me at that fucking restaurant! All this shit will be over once you give me my husband back so we can go home!
Rowena: Bitch!? Are you crazy? WE ARE MARRIED! YOU ARE DIVORCED! Your hass needs an asylum, forget counseling!
Julia: Guile is my husband. I married him first and divorcing him doesn’t make you his wife because he and I were married FIRST!
Rowena: That’s not how any of this shit works!!
Deepa: Thanks for the party. We’re heading out now before blood is drawn.
E. Honda: Goodbye everyone. Hurry up Deepa…let’s get out of here. *They get out of dodge*
Julia: You think me setting your garage on fire is it!? Putting me in jail only makes my mission clearer, I’m going to burn everything, including your “marriage” to the ground, but not before I fuck up your face so my husband will come home to ME!
Rashid: Oh shit! I gotta get a good angle of this one…*He legit flies in a drone he brought with him* Don’t stop on my account
Vega: It looks like the gauntlet has been thrown and competitor number one has made claims that she will disfigure her opponent and take back the man who is no longer her husband…how will competitor number two respond? *Evil smile*
Rowena: You being jealous an obsessive over women who are a million times better than you are is how you got into this shit in the first place! Move on! Find someone else. MY HUSBAND DOES NOT BELONG TO YOU. GET THAT THROUGH YOUR FUCKIN SKULL, SHIT FOR BRAINS!! He’s in my bed, fuckin me every night. Move on!!
Krystal: This is why you are divorced now, psycho!! Get off my property before I call the police!
*Julia once again throws the first punch and Rowena defends herself. The women are throwing punches wildly and then grab each other. They have now rolled to the ground after bouncing off a car near them*
Rashid: Both competitors have fallen to the ground! This fight could go either way! Who’s going to deal the blow that will turn the tide!?
*Rowena managed to land a pretty good punch to Julia’s face, blackening her eye and she also bloodied her nose. Julia manages to scratch Rowena’s face and draw blood, but is getting beaten. Rowena slams her head into the ground and then the fight is broken up*
*An ambulance is called for her by Guile*
*It arrives after 5 minutes*
*As Julia is put on the gurney, she looks at Guile*
Julia: My darling, you do still care for me….
Guile: I just didn’t want a death on my wife’s hands…you’re on your own Julia. You remind me every single time you show up, why we divorced.
*Tears are in her eyes as she watches him tend to Rowena and she is wheeled into the ambulance that soon drives off*
*Everyone officially gets in their cars and go home with their kids*
*Stacie and Vega arrive back at their lavish home*
*However, there’s another problem*
Stacie: Chelsea. I already told you; your mother can’t come and see you. We adopted you when you were two years old.
Chelsea: I know that, but why did you do that and take me away from my mother!?
Stacie: I already told you; I’ll tell you when you’re older!
Chelsea: If you won’t tell me, I’ll go find her myself.  Maybe she’ll take me back!
*Chelsea storms into the house as Ximena chases after her sister/cousin*
Vega: You’re going to have to tell her.
Stacie: She’s isn’t ready to hear about that, Vega.
*The two enter the home and then get ready for bed. Vega lets down his long hair as Stacie ties hers up*
Vega: You can’t avoid it now. She deserves to know.
Stacie: My eleven year old niece doesn’t need to know that her mother is a drug addicted whore in prison for killing someone. She gave me Chelsea, it’s not like I fought for her. I love her to death and want to see her happy and not hurt.
Vega: She needs to know, and she needs to know now, Stacie, or else you’re sleeping in the guest room tonight.
*Stacie sighs exasperated*
Stacie: Alright, alright! Chelsea!!
Chelsea: What!?
Stacie: Don’t say “what”! Come here!
Chelsea: *Coming into the room* Yes…?
Stacie: Sit down niece. It’s time I told you the truth.
Chelsea: About that.
Stacie: About your mother?
Chelsea: O…K…*She sits down cautiously*
Stacie: Chelsea, your mother is in prison.
Chelsea: Why, and when is she coming out?
Stacie: She’s serving a life sentence. For murder. She was also a drug addict.
Chelsea: What?
Stacie: She’s been on drugs since we were teenagers. She always ran away from home for days or weeks at a time, hiding in drug dens. She stole shit out of my mom’s house to sell. Rehab didn’t work, nothing worked. My mom finally got her house reinforced from the money I received from my first acting job. When she couldn’t get back in for more stuff to steal she sold her body for the money to buy drugs. She also sold herself to her dealer for an advance on drugs.
She was out there for years. I ended up marrying your uncle and then becoming pregnant with Ximena. I didn’t know where my sister was. I didn’t even know she was pregnant. Then one night, as my mom and I were watching the news, we saw her picture come up. She was wanted for murder. She murdered her long time client…the man who is your biological father.
His family was ashamed of him even paying a prostitute in the first place so they declined all the rights they had to raise you. She was on the run, and left you at the door of my mom’s house. I took you home with me, and two days later, your mother was arrested. She was charged with first-degree murder, convicted, and is now in prison.
Chelsea: Does she regret it?
Stacie: Sadly, no. I went to visit her in prison, just last month when you started asking questions. I have a recording of her I was going to keep to show you when you turned thirteen, but I guess you need to know now. I had to pay off the guards to do this because you need to see it.
*Stacie plays the recording of her mother Michelle*
Michelle: Chelsea, I gave you up to your aunt. Why? I’m not fit to be a mother, neither did I want to be. I never wanted you, hell I don’t even want to be looking at her ass right now. I’m only doing this because you need answers. You were a mistake. A mistake for me, but a blessing for your aunt and uncle. Don’t come looking for me, don’t come here. You will only be disappointed. I’m saying this with no feeling, no regret, and without a care for anything other than serving my life here. Move on Chelsea.
You have a good life. You have an aunt and uncle showering you with love and providing you beautifully, your cousin is by your side. You are well loved and taken care of. I don’t love you, I just had you because I was in a position where I needed to hide from the police and didn’t have the freedom to fully move about and terminate my pregnancy. She says you have a lot of friends, that’s good. Live a normal life.
If you have questions about your father, he’s dead. I killed him. None of his family wanted you. Neither did he. He didn’t want any of his whores he paid to have his kids. Usually, he paid for the terminations. His family signed over all of their rights and don’t even acknowledge your existence even though they are very aware of it.
 If I have one piece of advice for you…don’t end up like me. Period, at all. This is where we part for good. Turn the fucking camera off Stacie and don’t you come your sorry ass back here either.
*Video ends*
*Chelsea is silent, but she has tears in her eyes*
*Stacie holds her*
Chelsea: My own mom and dad didn’t want me? Why was I born?
Stacie: You have a family. I adopted you; your uncle adopted you alongside me. You have your cousin who loves you. You have people who really love you and we do everything to provide for you and have never treated you different than Ximena. I know this hard to swallow, but just know if you need anything, just talk to us. Ok?
Chelsea: You promise?
Vega: We owe you that much.
*She lets go of her aunt to embrace her uncle*
*She feels happier at least. Even if they aren’t her parents, at least she is well loved*
*She’s not going to wallow in despair because she at least knows the truth*
Chelsea: I’m gonna head to bed now. Ximena better not have taken all the covers again.
Stacie: If she does, I’m coming in there.
Chelsea: Good night.
Stacie: Good night…
*Chelsea goes to sleep in her shared room with her sister/cousin*
*Stacie cries and leans on her husband*
Vega: You did the right thing, mi vida. At least she knows the truth. We’ll be there to help her along the way.
Stacie: Yeah…
Vega: It’s been a while since we’ve had some alone time since we’ve both been working…
Stacie: What are you trying to say, honey? Tell me what you want.
Vega: That sweet…*he kisses her lips*…hot…*He kisses her again*…tight *He kisses her neck*…wet pussy in my mouth…*He pulls her to him* and wrapped around my beautiful dick…
*He pulls her down onto the bed kissing her and the camera backs out to give them their long awaited sexy time*
*In the Masters household*
*Adelaide, just as beautiful as her mother and getting as strong as her father finishes brushing her hair before covering it, waving to the camera and going to bed*
*Meanwhile, in the master bedroom*
Krystal: Can we have one fucking get together without some drama or this crazy bitch showing up?
Ken: I have no idea what we’re gonna do, we have to talk about this when we go to Rowena and Guile’s tomorrow. Good thing they don’t have kids together or Julia might actually burn the house down.
Krystal: She does have two kids. Cameron and Lacy from her previous marriage. She’s been having a custody battle with her ex husband for years and she gained sole custody of them. She actually is going to get them tomorrow to bring home. Guile had been there visiting with her kids their whole relationship so they are familiar with him.
Ken: Shit’s about to go down but I’m too tired to think about it now.
Krystal: Yeah, let’s go to sleep…I’m mentally and physically beat.
Ken: Night’ babe. *Kiss* You also owe me some good morning sex
Krystal: Good night. *Yawn* That depends on how well I sleep.
*The lights turn off as the episode ends*
THE ELITES HAVE DEBUTED AND ARE ALREADY SHOWING OFF
THERE’S NEVER A DULL MOMENT AT THESE PARTIES
JULIA SHOWED UP READY TO FIGHT WITH HER DELULU ASS AGAIN
IS THERE ANYONE WITHOUT FAMILY ISSUES? STACIE HAS A DRUG ADDICTED SISTER AND THAT WOMAN IS BETTER OFF NOT BEING A MOTHER AT ALL.
UPCOMING EPISODE 2: THE WINTER WONDERLAND BALL AND CHELSEA BURGESS FABIO LA CERDA STANDS TALL (SHE BECOMES A CONTENT CREATOR HERSELF)
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helyiios · 4 months
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I had a dream once that the IMF boys had a tiktok and did the classic tiktok things mid-missions and stuff and I NEED to know you opinion on what their account would be like
Ok so replying to this again. I think Benji Jane and Will are the most online (and let’s indulge and say that it doesn’t cause conflit of interest with the fact they’re secret agents lol)
Benji’s the most popular (2.3M followers) and he posts the randomest most funniest shit on the PLANET. He hardlaunches Ethan with the out of my league trend (13M) despite NEVER mentioning being in a relationship before. He regularly forces Luther and Ethan to do trends w the rest of Hunt’s team, like I can’t find ayesha cuz she’s probably sucking dick/bitch pick up your goddamn phone you’re gonna make me sick where they all are on it w really cool transitions. He likes to talk abt SW or ST or DW a lot and one of his most liked videos (and how some people discovered him) is him replying to a comment that’s like “what’s knotting” and he just stares into the cam while putting one a red nose to a circus music. He posts himself and Ilsa while they’re dressed up for the opera on a mission with like the song fashion in the background and everyone goes crazy. He posts a vid where it’s him and Ethan looking at each other with the baby I’m yours song and it gets like 20M views. He does a transition from him at the gym to him in evening clothes he had to wear for a mission to everyday I spend my time drinking wine feeling fine and he doesn’t EVEN mean to do it as a thirst trap but that’s how it’s received and people are like oh my god…benji. Similarly he makes a post where he details his tattoos (after being asked a buncha times) and he’s shirtless, and everyone’s losing their minds because they’re like YOU HAVE A SIX PACKS? He and Jane post a short dancing vid to cmon let’s get it started lemme see you move your body and it goes goes viral bcs that’s when their respective followers find out they’re friends. He makes a photo post that’s like we’ll be a fine line we’ll be alright with a pic of the first hunts team mission w their latest one, and people ask him if he likes Harry styles and he just goes “who❤️” He does the pabrobui mwah mwah trend w Ilsa while they’re ALSO in a mission in Poland and they’re dressed in very warm clothes and everyone’s like oh my god…I’ve seen two pretty best friends. I genuinely think he’s got a few moves in him so there’s one of his most liked vids where he’s filming himself cooking in his kitchen where he’s barely dancing to busy earnin’ and the vibes are IMMACULATE. He 100% did the ceilings and you with the dark curls you with the watercolour eyes trends. He ALSO forced the entire team to do the benjamin’s deli trend (dancing slowly in the light vs throwing moves in the dark while people put on their phones’ light). He also posts himself during a training sesh to bts’ steve aoki remix mic drop and people are like YOU FUCKING KNOW BTS? and he just goes stan jin👍 he’s also a skilled violin and piano player so sometimes he posts himself playing.
Jane’s account is at 700k and one of her most liked vids is with Ilsa where they’re lipsynching the pam and i feed off each other’s energy. I tease her, she teases me (…) and that’s when people start to get that they’re all mates. She does the bitch you know I’m sexy trend with Will and Benji. She forces Ethan (he lost a dare) to do the you carry yourself with the confidence of a…much taller man trend. She soft launches Ilsa w a video of “24H in my life” (while she’s on break) where you can see glimpse of her gf and her followers go insane trying to figure out who it is. She posts herself and benji where benji’s tied to a repelling cable on a high building and she’s zooming in on him w the never back down never what/never give up audio in the background and people are like what the fuck r y’all doing??? She also is a great dancer so she regularly posts herself to the latest dance trend (she KILLED Angel in Tibet and Back on 74.) Both she and Benji did the okokokok lalala trend w their respective partners. (ilsa’s ok janes lala and ethans lala while benjis okokok)
Brandt (560k) is fucking hysterical bcs you’d think he doesn’t know what fun is and is so serious about literally everything and well. you’d be kind of right. He mostly post himself at the gym and people ask him a lot abt his supplements and his program, things to which is gracefully replies. His most liked video is SO Brandt coded because it’s just him crossed armed at his desk looking into the cam with like, company in the background, which technically qualifies as a thirst trap and everyone’s so confused because they’re like oh my god…I think I’m attracted to office workers. He also posts a lot of him sparring, sometimes w Benji or Jane or Ethan or Ilsa and people go kind of insane about those. He never gets Hunley on cam but once he replies to a comment that’s like “are you free tonight” and he just stares into the cam and pulls hunley’s left hand w the wedding band on it with the audio IM MARRIED in the background. THATS where his followers find out he’s gay and they’re like A WIN FOR THE COMMUNITY. Just like benji he can play the guitar, so sometimes he posts vids of himself playing, either of requested songs or some he likes.
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maisanctuary · 8 months
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14 common inner critic attacks
Here is a list of 14 common inner critic attacks divided into the key categories of perfectionism and endangerment. Each is paired with a healthier (and typically more accurate) thought-substitution response. Click here for the PDF version.
Perfectionism My perfectionism arose as an attempt to gain safety and support in my dangerous family. Perfection is a self-persecutory myth. I do not have to be perfect to be safe or loved in the present. I am letting go of relationships that require perfection. I have a right to make mistakes. Mistakes do not make me a mistake. Every mistake or mishap is an opportunity to practice loving myself in the places I have never been loved.
All-or-None & Black-and-White Thinking I reject extreme or overgeneralized descriptions, judgments or criticisms. One negative happenstance does not mean I am stuck in a never-ending pattern of defeat. Statements that describe me as “always” or “never” this or that, are typically grossly inaccurate.
Self-Hate, Self-Disgust & Toxic Shame I commit to myself. I am on my side. I am a good enough person. I refuse to trash myself. I turn shame back into blame and disgust, and externalize it to anyone who shames my normal feelings and foibles. As long as I am not hurting anyone, I refuse to be shamed for normal emotional responses like anger, sadness, fear and depression. I especially refuse to attack myself for how hard it is to completely eliminate the self-hate habit.
Micromanagement/Worrying/Obsessing/ Looping/ Over-Futurizing I will not repetitively examine details over and over. I will not jump to negative conclusions. I will not endlessly second-guess myself. I cannot change the past. I forgive all my past mistakes. I cannot make the future perfectly safe. I will stop hunting for what could go wrong. I will not try to control the uncontrollable. I will not micromanage myself or others. I work in a way that is “good enough”, and I accept the existential fact that my efforts sometimes bring desired results and sometimes they do not. “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference” - The Serenity Prayer
Unfair/Devaluing Comparisons To others or to one’s most perfect moments. I refuse to compare myself unfavorably to others. I will not compare “my insides to their outsides”. I will not judge myself for not being at peak performance all the time. In a society that pressure us into acting happy all the time, I will not get down on myself for feeling bad.
Guilt Feeling guilty does not mean I am guilty. I refuse to make my decisions and choices from guilt; sometimes I need to feel the guilt and do it anyway. In the inevitable instance when I inadvertently hurt someone, I will apologize, make amends, and let go of my guilt. I will not apologize over and over. I am no longer a victim. I will not accept unfair blame. Guilt is sometimes camouflaged fear. – “I am afraid, but I am not guilty or in danger”.
"Shoulding” I will substitute the words “want to” for “should” and only follow this imperative if it feels like I want to, unless I am under legal, ethical or moral obligation.
Overproductivity/Workaholism/Busyholism I am a human being not a human doing. I will not choose to be perpetually productive. I am more productive in the long run, when I balance work with play and relaxation. I will not try to perform at 100% all the time. I subscribe to the normalcy of vacillating along a continuum of efficiency.
Harsh Judgments of Self & Others/Name-Calling I will not let the bullies and critics of my early life win by joining and agreeing with them. I refuse to attack myself or abuse others. I will not displace the criticism and blame that rightfully belongs to them onto myself or current people in my life. “I care for myself. The more solitary, the more friendless, the more unsustained I am, the more I will respect myself”. - Jane EyreENDANGERMENT ATTACKS
Drasticizing/Catastrophizing/Hypochondrisizing I feel afraid but I am not in danger. I am not “in trouble” with my parents. I will not blow things out of proportion. I refuse to scare myself with thoughts and pictures of my life deteriorating. No more home-made horror movies and disaster flicks.
Negative focus I renounce over-noticing & dwelling on what might be wrong with me or life around me. I will not minimize or discount my attributes. Right now, I notice, visualize and enumerate my accomplishments, talents and qualities, as well as the many gifts Life offers me, e.g., friends, nature, music, film, food, beauty, color, pets, etc.
Time Urgency I am not in danger. I do not need to rush. I will not hurry unless it is a true emergency. I am learning to enjoy doing my daily activities at a relaxed pace.
Disabling Performance Anxiety I reduce procrastination by reminding myself that I will not accept unfair criticism or perfectionist expectations from anyone. Even when afraid, I will defend myself from unfair criticism. I won’t let fear make my decisions.
Perseverating About Being Attacked Unless there are clear signs of danger, I will thought-stop my projection of past bully/critics onto others. The vast majority of my fellow human beings are peaceful people. I have legal authorities to aid in my protection if threatened by the few who aren’t. I invoke thoughts and images of my friends’ love and support.
Source: Pete Walker in "Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving"
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sean-kuraly · 2 years
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thank you so much to all of y'all for helping me reach 100 followers! for this celebration i'll be taking instagram edit requests for any of the players i write for! all of your requests will be done hopefully within the week and today and tomorrow i'll be working on finishing up any requests waiting in my inbox <3
tagging some mutuals for reach and bc i never could have gotten here without y'all: @ethancale @thombordy @erikports @pierrelucduboiis @1-800-iluvhockey @nickblankenburgg @bigbastian
much love to all y'all and thank you so much for helping me get here!
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hacash · 1 year
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deranged ship ideas which will never come to fruition but if they do I will give JSuds my firstborn
Nate x Bex: Bex deserves someone to value her for herself, rather than as a pathway to a greater goal. Nate deserves one relationship in his life which doesn’t bring with it all the baggage from Richmond. Rupert deserves to be cheated on.
Also: they’re both cute as a button; the smol guy x tall girl thing is always hot; Nate gets on with little girls and thus could be the perfect stepfather for li’l Diana; Bex can be a little awkward and quirky at times; and Bex is proven to have a thing for the evil silver fox type. 
(I actually do think the show could pull this off, so I may have been a bit rash with the future of my hypothetical firstborn already.)
Thierry x Richard: Thierry is Quebecois, Richard is European French. Richard is a sophisticate who knows a fine wine does not have to be an expensive wine, Thierry thinks wearing bright red Yeezys to a funeral is a solid life choice. They’re like star-crossed lovers. The only similarity is that they got red-carded reeaal quick at the West Ham match, and neither of them get to hold the team braincell very often.
Colin x Lindsay Higgins: I’ll say this until I’m blue in the face: ‘appreciates life’s little grey areas’ is code for queer person of faith. I don’t make the rules, this is just a fact. Also, please consider that Lindsay Higgins is an absolute fox and Colin ‘thirsty much?’ Hughes totally deserves to sleep with a hot vicar. 
And ‘my body’s like a church in an airport’. Lindsay is a vicar. I’ve connected the dots. (You haven’t connected shit.)
Bumbercatch x Jan: Smolandtolsmolandtol. 
Beard x Ms Bowen: She’s a bit quirky and snarky enough for Beard; Beard has that same slightly gruff but charmingly enigmatic vibe that Ms Bowen seemed to appreciate in Roy. Also, and this is the most important part, Ms Bowen is not Jane.
Sharon x Trent Crimm: Yes, I know they haven’t even interacted once, but that much swag combined would create a power couple literally too fabulous for us to witness. Their child would probably end up ruling the world.
Nate x Colin: (I must be the only person in fandom to whom Nate gives off an awkward late-bloomer queer vibe, but there you go.) I am an absolute freaking sucker for a ship where two people have genuinely hurt each other and still manage to come out the other side. Colin would absolutely encourage Nate to loosen up more and have fun; Nate would use his somewhat fighty nature to protect Colin. And, as I have said before, if I wasn’t supposed to ship Colin and Nate then why the fuck did they have a shirtless Billy Harris getting all close and personal with Nate while smooshing his face and going ‘look at your face, look at your face’ in the first episode?! Just what acting and directorial choices were going on there?!
Plus, for my newer followers, I am 100% convinced that Colin would go full Dark Side for an evil silver fox at the drop of a hat.
I know it’s not gonna happen but on the other hand, I really really think it could happen. JSuds, my firstborn could be all yours for the low, low price of going absolutely batshit this season.
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The Irritable Bowel Showdown competitors have been decided!!!
Thank you for your patience, everyone! The participants have been chosen, the bracket has been tentatively created, and preparations for Round One are underway!!!
Thank you for the feedback on my poll about the number of participants. Although the option for accepting further submissions had the most support, after narrowing down the eligible participants to 102, I decided it would be best to continue with the current number so the tournament could begin! As a result, some characters with a higher seeding will automatically move to the second round to accommodate the awkward number of competitors.
The full roster is as follows:
Alphys from Undertale Amu Hinamori from Shugo Chara anon who shit on couch from real life Asahi Azumane from Haikyuu!! Bambi from Dave & Bambi Barry Bluejeans from The Adventure Zone: Balance Belphegor from SMT/Persona series Benrey from Half-Life VR but the AI Is Self-Aware [AKA HLVR: AI] Bor'dor Dog'son from Critical Role (Campaign 3: Bells Hells) Bubbie from The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack c!Tommyinnit from Dream SMP Carlton Ulysses Wheezer from Jimmy Neutron Chidi Anagonye from The Good Place Clark Kent from Superman Craig Boone from Fallout: New Vegas Dabi from My Hero Academia Dareth from LEGO Ninjago Dave Strider from Homestuck David Rose from Schitt's Creek Dean Winchester from Supernatural Deandra The New Girl from The Most Popular Girls In School Declan Lynch from The Dreamer Trilogy by Maggie Stiefvater Dimitri 1 from 101 Dalmatian Street DJ from Beast Wars II Doctor Sung from TWRP Dr Crygor from Warioware Elmo Monster from Sesame Street/Elmo's Potty Time Enid Mettle from OK K.O.! Let's Be Heroes Filbo Fiddlepie from Bugsnax Geralt of Rivia from The Witcher God of Indigestion from The Discworld series: Hogfather, by Terry Pratchett Griffin McElroy from real life Hailey from Hatchetfield Nightmare Time Harrowhark Nonagesimus from The Lockes Tomb Hatsune Miku from Vocaloid Henry the Green Engine from Thomas and Friends Hinata Shouyou from Haikyuu Hiroshi Yuuki from Full Dive: This Ultimate Next-Gen Full Dive RPG Is Even Shittier than Real Life! Isaac Moriah from The Binding of Isaac James Tiberius Kirk from Star Trek: The Original Series Jane Doe AKA Soldier from Team Fortress 2 Jean Pierre Polnareff from JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Johnny Sasaki from Metal Gear Josuke Higashikata from JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Jotaro Kujo from JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Juniper Sloan from Camp Here And There Kakashi Hatake from Naruto Kanata from Gokurakugai Kuruto Ryuki from AI: The Sominum Files - Nirvana Initiative Kuwabara Kazuma from Yu Yu Hakusho Lan Zhan (Lan Wangji) from The Untamed Larry Appleton from Perfect Strangers Loki the cat from real life Magellan from One Piece Mari from Yellowjackets Marinette Dupain-Cheng from Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir Marvin Grossberg from Ace Attorney Megatron from Transformers Mr. Tang from Lego Monkie Kid Napstablook from Undertale Naruto Uzumaki from Naruto Nekomaru Nidai from Danganronpa Niki Shiina from Ensemble Stars Nyack of the Rana’for from Not Another D&D Podcast Ochako Uraraka from My Hero Academia Okuyasu Nijimura from JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Onceler from The Lorax Owen from Total Drama Panty Anarchy from Panty and Stocking With Garterbelt PaRappa from PaRappa the Rapper Porky Pig from Looney Tunes Primis "Tank" Dempsey from Call of Duty Zombies Queen Chrysalis from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Raji Shenazard from Snow White with the Red Hair Reigen Arataka from Mob Psycho 100 Rock Lee from Naruto Roy Kent from Ted Lasso Rung from Transformers Saint from Rain World Sakaeguchi Yuuto from Ookiku Furikabutte Senri from Koisuru Bokura wa Ichou ga Yowai Shauna Shipman from Yellowjackets Shit in Pants Guy from Johnny The Homicidal Maniac Shoichi Irie from Katekyo Hitman Reborn Spamton from Deltarune Spock from Star Trek: The Original Series Steven Universe from Steven Universe Tagora Gorjek from Hiveswap Tenzil Kem (aka Matter Eater Lad) from DC The cat from Lyle Lyle the Crocodile (movie) The test subject who shat in the elevator from Portal 2 Tomura Shigaraki from My Hero Academia Toshinori Yagi/All Might from My Hero Academia Triss Merigold from The Witcher Books Vetinari from Discworld Walter Tattersall from Yellowjackets William Afton from Five Nights at Freddys Yamaguchi Tadashi from Haikyuu!! Yami Sukehiro from Black Clover you the voter from real life Yuuga Aoyama from My Hero Academia Zhao Yunlan from Guardian
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silviakundera · 2 months
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Manner of Death ep 2-3 rewatch
Everyone in this fucked up lil town is suspicious. Twin Peaks vibes continue.
Local detective is like, no problem dude. You had a personal relationship with the decreased but you can still handle the autopsy. I trust your professionalism. oh if only he knew that Bun just accidentally? on purpose? reframed the story of last night to Hot Stranger Tan arguing with Jane, who had a mark on her. Leaving out the part where Tan was clearly whaling on Bun's Old Friend because he'd done something not-good to Jane. We already see that Bun has like -100 in objectivity and good judgement lmao.
This will bode well for his love life.
I remain confused why Tan is stepping in to teach a class of students?? Does he really do a teaching side job?? idk this whole drama is a fever dream. I'm not gonna worry about it.
Love how early episodes Tan's entire modus operandi is to protect good doctor Bun by... warning him off in the most smugly menacing way possible.
Bun: "everyone is suspicious"
me: ok yeah that's true
Bun: "but you are more suspicious than others"
me: ... i want to, and yet can't argue with that
It's not clear to me still, and this is a rewatch, if the whole, 'have Bun repeatedly attacked to terrify him into dropping the case' thing was Tan's idea & execution vs following orders from his brother. Either way it's nuts that Bun later just brushes that off, but that's why this is weirdo4weirdo.
Ep 3
It's like I can SEE Bun's thought process now. Which is both social darwin's law dumb but ALSO thirsty-guy understandable.
Tan is his best suspect for the murder & absolutely sketchy but also the hot guy he kissed when drunk & was kissed back. Now Tan keeps showing up and giving major sexy vibes and major I'm-involved-in-this-case vibes. Maybe he's the killer. Which would be bad. Bun will probably get murdered. But maybe he's not! In which case, Bun completely turning away his advances and not allowing himself to be pursued could mean hot guy loses interest. Bun is thinking with his dick but in his defense, hot guy keeps showing up and doing wild shit like telling him his hands smell good, and bringing him a cute Get Well Soon cactus, insisting on driving him home from the hospital, and beating up a trespassing thug.
Do I let him stay the night?
Con: he might be the person actually threatening me
Pro: he might just really be into me
(spoiler: he's both! 😭😂😭😂)
I honestly have such profound admiration for Tan's audacity here as he gaslights this man into moving into his home to be safe from the night terrors & insomnia he caused.
Though I'd completely forgotten that the whole "we can share the bed" part WAS BUN.
bruh.
I mean, I guess if you are going to risk your life for that fine face then might as well. YOLO
This is like 2 dick-drunk dumbasses upping each other in shameless Lock It Down manoeuvres while cosplaying as just your average reasonable and well-socialized locals, throw together by true-crime circumstance.
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actuallyitsstar · 2 months
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oh my god tumblr is not a functional website and it ate my next two drafted asks so prepare to get tagged in textposts but @brambleberrycottage sent The Mentalist and/or Person of Interest for the fandom ask game:
✨ send me a fandom and i'll answer with the following!
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for person of interest:
blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)
↣ very tough choice but i am gonna have to go with shaw for this one. my second choice probably would be reese tho- but i have to go by what ao3 tags i filter the most 😭
scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)
↣ BEAR THE DOG.....OBVIOUSLY....... akjdhdjfhf but for real it is probably finch. finch rly is So Shaped to me. i do not want anything bad to happen to him Ever. Protect At All Costs
scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)
↣ FUSCO. FUSCO IS SUCH AN UNDERRATED FAVE. theres like 10 fics out there about my man fusco and ive reread all of them 100 times aldjfkfhjfgjgj this man just shows up to work every day and tries his best and he gets dragged into some of the craziest world-altering conspiracies known to man and for what ??? he just wants to come home to his son every day. but he cares about people and his friends and the world his son grows up IN, and thats why he sticks by the others no matter what he gets put thru. also he is just very funny and relatable at times akdhdjfhf
glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)
↣ harper!!! very much obscure but she has a cute lil arc that feels Meaningful and has such a fun energy and she has such an ~ outcome ~ (i will not spoil in case anyone who has not seen this show is thinking of seeing it) and tbh i want to learn everything about her
poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)
↣ elias. he is very problematic. very controversial. horrible villain crimelord etc etc. but isnt it interesting how this show plays with morality? how much nuance there is? how you slowly learn that finch is right- that there are no heroes or villains, just people doing the best they can??? elias is a terrible person that you would never want to meet in real life but hes MY terrible person you would never want to meet in real life.
horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)
↣ this is reese hands down. sorry not sorry to the traumatized man but i do kind of enjoy you getting more traumatized
eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)
↣ i guess john greer ???? im not sorry, forget everything i said about nuance hes a villain akdhfdjkfhfj he is the worst im joking but if i have to pick anyone its him
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for the mentalist:
blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)
↣ its jane. of course its jane. what we have learned about me is i am always stanning traumatized over confident (often middle aged middle aged) men in problematic career paths with emotional issues 😭 its embarrassing how consistent i rly am tbh lmao. but HES SO INTERESTING. HES SO TRAGIC. HES SO MULTIFACETED. i could probably write 600 dissertations about him
scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)
↣ lisbon is my girl i love her so much i will not take any notes on this she is MY five foot nothing cop with anger management issues and i WOULD die for her. shes probably my height irl but she is !!!! small. i love her
scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)
↣ cho is so underrated !!!!! he is there from start to finish and he gets his own arcs and his own story and he's level-headed and in charge but he's not emotionless and he's not perfect, he's very good at what he does but he makes mistakes too and he's mature enough to own up to them. his realism and commitment is bracing and reliable and brings such a steady element to the show. couldnt do it without him!!
glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)
↣ she's really not even on screen for more than like 0.1 seconds of flashback but !!! ANGELA JANE. i know we don't get to know much in the way of cannonical characterization but i have read a lot of fics about her. i think the most influential has to be boy wonder, which is a wonderful how-angela-and-young-patrick-met fic unfortunately trapped on the horrible formatting of fanfiction dot net, but every time i think of angela i think of this fic and it very deeply informed my love for her character.
poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)
↣ probably laroche. deeply weird man but he just wanted to go home to his little figurines and his fluffy dog. what more could he ask for. very creepy vibe but he did his job well and he came around in the end. i would love to know what sort of life made this man happen. i think about the iconic theater episode with him every day.
horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)
↣ aaaaa once again its jane im so sorry sir i just find your trauma entertaining !!!!!
eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)
↣ probably bertram because i just think he was way scarier than the sherriff sorry sljfkfjfjg
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