#jay is driven to find some kind of work around and ends up falling more into the dark side

[fishybehavior]

I have ideas that are stuck in my head

[trashmancer]

Again, been reading a lot recently, and here's some recent reads and my thoughts. (All very spoiler-free)

Johannes Cabal: The Necromancer by Jonathan L. Howard

I'd heard about this series for a while, but had always kept putting off reading it, and finally I was in the mood for some comedic (yet dark) shenanigans--and a villain protagonist as charming as Johannes Cabal really hit me just right. I really enjoyed the first of this series and the introduction to this 1920's-ish universe similar-yet-different to our own that Howard's created. His writing is crisp and clever--and Johannes is a villain protagonist worth cheering for. He's duplicitous, arrogant, and cold, yet sharp-witted and competent enough to be engaging, and even though he's amoral (driven predominately with an "ends do justify the means" mentality) there are glimmers of a conscious buried in there.

The basic gist of the first book is that Johannes Cabal is a necromancer dead-set (ba-dum-sh) on thwarting the biggest plague affecting mankind: Death. As such, he's willing to go to extreme lengths to hone and perfect his necromantic abilities. In the pursuit of this knowledge, Cabal sold his soul to Satan, but he comes to realize he actually needs his soul for his necromancy to work more properly (apparently without a soul it gets very unpredictable). In order to win his soul back, he strikes a wager with Satan: he will accumulate 100 souls for Satan in return for his own. Satan, ever the fair player (not), gifts Cabal with an infernal carnival to help Cabal reach his goal within the year. Shenanigans ensue.

While I read some books in-between this one and the next in the series, I'll write about the other here--

Johannes Cabal: The Detective by Jonathan L. Howard

So clearly I enjoyed the first installment enough to keep going, and I am glad, because I enjoyed the second one even more than the first. It feels like Howard got more comfortable with the characters and world than before, and in this one he expands his universe with some made-up countries that are similar-to-yet-different than countries on our Earth. In this one, Cabal does less fantastic tricks, as he dons the role of investigator (there's been a murder--on an airship!), but the plot was very fun. I will say this is one of the first books in a long while to genuinely make my world-weary ass laugh out loud in public. Howard truly does know how to turn a phrase and comes off with some great witticisms.

Guns of the Dawn by Adrian Tchaikovsky

Tchaikovsky has been on my radar for a while because I have had Children of Time on my reading list for what feels like an age (and I still haven't gotten around to reading it, but I will soon). To prime myself, I looked up other works by Tchaikovsky. This was around the time I was look for good "stand-alone" Adult Fantasy novels as well, so the two linked up and I had this on my TBR for a while and got around to finally cracking it open.

I really loved this book. If I could describe it in any way, it would be sort of like Pride & Prejudice if Elizabeth Bennet got drafted into a war. Seriously. That's how it reads--and Tchaikovsky made the allusions to Austen's work very clear. The setting is very English-inspired, and the time period mimics Napoleonic times. Definitely the first "Flintlock Fantasy" I've had the pleasure of reading.

The themes of the book are about the caustic nature of nationalism, the blurring of truth during war, and what is true patriotism in the face of falsehood and horror. Definitely my kind of questions--and I love watching characters thrown into completely unfamiliar environments. A genteel woman (Emily Marshwic) being tossed headfirst into grisly, mosquito-infested swamps armed with a musket? It's a fascinating journey she undergoes.

Plus the novel featured a romantic subplot that hits my enemies-to-lovers buttons hard. (It's not at all like one of those tired YA enemies-to-lovers stories, but something more grown-up and messy, which I approve of, because I love drama.) But this is more of a personal note. It's definitely not going to be for everyone.

Retribution Falls (Tales of the Ketty Jay #1) by Chris Wooding

After Johannes Cabal, I got into the mood for some steampunk, and I hadn't actually read much in the way of steampunk, so I looked up some recs and the Tales of the Ketty Jay series seemed to appear on a lot of lists for this kinda thing. The basic gist of this one is... imagine steampunk Firefly. That kinda gives you the whole vibe and feel. It's about a crew of disparate and colorful characters all running from something who meet on the ship the Ketty Jay and have to learn to work together to survive.

Overall, it was a fast-paced read (I read this 400 page sucker in a single day--while doing other stuff) and Wooding knows how to write action and interesting character interactions. The world had some glimmers of brilliance (the wizard analogs in their world--daemonist--were the most intriguing part), but otherwise it was very typical steampunk. I had no real quibbles with any of that (aside from the fact some of it read as very cliche and Wooding's inspirations seemed a little obvious--Fullmetal Alchemist and Firefly being the two big ones that kept hammering me over the head), but my main complaint was with the writing and treatment of female characters. First, there is only one main female character in the Ketty Jay's crew--Jez. I had no real issues with Jez's character or writing (in fact she's refreshing in some ways), but she's completely isolated from any other female characters (and is also the only crew member who isn't really allowed to be a complete screw up--she's somewhat sanitized, which, I guess the heroic women characters aren't allowed to be fuck ups like the men?). Second, the other predominate female characters, of whom there are only three, are mute/dehumanized (Bess), characterized as stupid and unhinged (Amalicia), and have rape-as-a-backstory-written-TERRIBLY (Trinica). All that said, as much as it was cringe, this was written in 2009, and I am sure Wooding has had some growth as a writer since then.

I liked this one enough to decide to check out the next in the series (even knowing the writing for the female characters leaves much to be desired).

Black Sun by Rebecca Roanhorse

A Fantasy taking place in an Americas-inspired world? Absolutely refreshing (and more please). The main gist of this one is that a cult sets out to resurrect a dead god (seriously that's the main plot crux) while political machinations are going on in the central city of this country where the resurrection is going to take place. As the novel progresses, it's like a countdown clock to game time. There's four POV characters we follow: Xiala (a Teek sea captain who is kind of an outcast from her native people and has a love for beautiful people), Serapio (the man who has been groomed since birth to be the vessel for the resurrected god, part of this process has included blinding him), Naranpa (the Sun Priest of the capital city who is trying to garner back control the priesthood has lost), and Okoa (who really doesn't even appear until way later into the book; he's been separated from his family to train to be a warrior). For the most part, I was primarily engaged (re: 90% engaged) with Xiala and Serapio's story. They were the most interesting characters, and the journey of them on the sea trying to get to the city before the ceremony was exciting and emotional. The political dealings in Naranpa's segments kind of bogged down the action--and I didn't feel anything for that. Overall though, definitely a thrilling read with a beautifully constructed world. If I had one big criticism, it's that it ended incredibly abruptly without any resolution. I knew going in this was a part of a greater whole, but I still felt the ends could've been knotted a little tighter. I'm left dangling! But I'll be sure to pick up the next one (if anything just to find out what happens to Xiala and Serapio).

Vicious by V.E. Schwab

As an unapologetic villainfucker, I had to read this one, right? It's about not just one, but two villains! How could I lose? And they're in an intense rivalry? Revenge? Betrayal? Superpowers? Gah! Be still my heart!

I'll say I enjoyed this book (fun characters, solid writing), but I didn't love it as much as I thought I would (I wish I could love yooouuuu!). Definitely worth a recommendation to anyone who loves villains and fast-paced narratives, but... there were a few things that tarnished what could've been sparkling. The biggest for me was the jumping around in the first half. For a length of time, the novel leaps between three different points of time, sometimes 2-3 pages at a time, and it was jarring (not confusing, mind you, but it was a jolt each time). I get it was done to create an air of mystique and intrigue, but it felt like I was getting dragged around by the ear. Along with this, the plot just seemed... very convenient? As various moments kept happening, it all felt too tidy and paint-by-numbers. The characters were certainly messy and fun (and I love messy and fun), but the action itself seemed to glide on well-oiled rails with no hiccups. This did lead to the magnetic pacing of the book (which I also read in a day), but it didn't do the drama any favors. Never once did it feel like the characters were caught with their pants down--and I think that's part of the point, but it kind of dampened the tension.

I liked it enough I am definitely going to check out the sequel Vengeful though. If anything I am reading for Sydney, Mitch, and Victor. I gotta know what happens to them!

--

Right now I am reading some fluffy fluff to cleanse my palette because I've been reading so much moodiness. I'm mid-way through the light and breezy Half a Soul by Olivia Atwater (and it's super cute so far) and then I am finally going to crack open Andy Weir's The Martian (because I have put off reading it for far too long).

[siimjaeyun]

Chapter 3: A vote for ghost trucks 

Synopsis: Heeseung’s father, the head of city, asks him to get more involved with the family tactics of politics. Luckily, the mystery group is up to lending him a hand and helping him get re-elected. Or well-that’s the plan up until a ghost truck appears in the city stealing door knobs. 

Series Masterlist

------------

The young boy drove at full speed before stopping himself at witnessing the blaring blue and red rights of the motorbike behind him. The officer approached his window, moving his glasses downwards to meet the boy eye to eye. 

“You do know your speeding right?” 

“Yes officer, I'm’ v-very sorry.” The officer did not get a chance to respond before a thundering sound escaped from behind; following a large truck covered in fire and meshed cloth. 

He quickly turned his attention towards the speeding vehicle, rushing and trying to get a response. Yet, the truck held nothing and instead moved sideways to push the man off the road. The truck escaped without a trace, and the officer was left dangling off a tree. 

------ 

Heeseung found himself walking up the stairs of the city building and directly into his father’s office. 

“You don’t think he’ll send me away. He usually never calls me here.” 

“I doubt it. Besides, we’re right here.” Sunghoon patted his back gently and saw as Mayor Lee left the room to welcome his son. 

“Heeseung, you’re just on time! I thought it was time for you to learn about the family business, politics.” 

“But dad, that’s adulting. I’m a teen, and teens like building traps and mystery solving.” 

“No they don’t Heeseung. I want you to be involved, and you can start by helping me print pamphlets for my re-election.” He shoved a slip of paper into his hands and trudged in the opposite direction. 

“Looks like we’re on office duty.” Sunoo and Jake quickly got to the copy machine, first attempting to even figure how to turn on the damn machine. 

“y/n can’t make it today, but I know she’s sending you support.” Jungwon gave him a small smile, and joined the confused duo by the copy machine. 

------

“Are we an item? Girl quit playing.” The Bieber sang rang in the background as you worked on the embroidered design on the black bucket hat in your hands. 

“Y/n! Dad wants to see you!” Jay’s voice echoed from down stairs, leaving you with no other option than to obey his wishes. You made your way downstairs and saw a young man waiting by the entrance. 

“Ah, Y/n, I’d like you to meet Han Jaehyun, the son of Han Cooperation.” 

“It’s my pleasure to meet you, here’s a small pendant for you.” He tossed you the ladder shaped pendant, but you casted it inside your pocket. 

“Well, I must get going, but um how about I give you a call later for a magical outing on the town. See you later, babe.” Confused, you turned to Jay who had simply been observing quietly from the staircase. 

“You’re trying to set me up on a date!?” 

“Honey, at least give Jaehyun a chance” 

“B-but, what about Heeseung?” You pushed them away and took a seat on the stairs waiting for them to respond. 

“Yeah, but aren’t you guys just friends?”

“Yeah, but it feels like cheating,” an uncomfortable pause broke out so you spoke again, “I mean cheating on a good friend of course.” 

“Sis, come on. It’s just one itty bitty date.” You unconsciously rolled your eyes, and made your way out the door. 

“You only say that because you're the family's favorite.” 

-------

“Uhh...Jungwon, I’m pretty sure that’s not how you do it.” 

“Relax, just type 40,000 and boom.” He pushed the big green button without a care, and soon enough, the machine crashed and blasted a dark ink through the room. 

“Just fantastic, you broke it!” Sunoo gave him a smack in the head and saw a man approaching them; his suit covered in a similar ink. 

“Look what you did to my suit!” 

“What’s the meaning of this?” Mayor Lee stepped out from the comfort of his office and saw his rival, vivid and clearly upset at the disaster he found. 

“If you’re going to play dirty Lee, then two can play that game.” Without another word, he left quickly. 

“Who was that dad?” 

“Mr.Xiang, he’s the candidate I’m running against. His father was mayor, but was removed when he robbed a diamond. He still claims his father is innocent.” A small hum escaped from him before he left the scene. 

“Let’s get this fixed now before picking up Y/n.” They got to work; picking up the pieces and cleaning the ink off the walls. 

------ 

You sat on the edge of curve, patiently waiting for a light purple van to pull up with your chaotic friends. 

“You have a moment?” Jay peered out the front door and took a place beside you. 

“Do I have an option?” You both chuckled and sat in a comfortable silence. 

“I’m sorry, you’re right. I don’t know how you feel, but if you really don’t want to go on that date...I’ll try to convince mom and dad.” 

“Really?” You turned at him with confusion and played with your hands not knowing how to deal with the issue in front. Jay was trying to help you, and you had found a way to get rid of dating random guys that your family finds ‘fit.’ Yet, a bigger part of you knew that your feelings for Heeseung would go unresolved if you never gave yourself the chance to explore. 

“I-I really appreciate that Jay, really, but if I ever want to get over my crush, then maybe trying wouldn’t hurt.” You gave him a small fist bump and looked up when a honk welcomed you to join the friend group. 

“I’ll see you later Jay.” You got up and into the van you went, lightly waving at Jay from your window seat. 

The night had settled, and your drive towards home was engulfed in a karaoke talent show. 

“Yikes, what kind of maniac has such bright lights?” All of your bodies turned backwards and a sudden force pushed the van to the edge. 

“The heck is this man’s problem.” The phantom truck soon drove stronger and managed to get the van to sked off the edge of the cliff. Running on adrenaline, Heeseung managed to prevent the van from falling into the ocean below. A breath of relief escaped from everybody in the van, and it was a while before the truck finally managed to disappear in the fog in front. 

-------

“So you’re telling me a ghost truck tried to kill you?” Chief Kim looked at you with a questionable expression, but when your head nods affirmed what you had told him, he broke out into a smile, “finally, a tourist attraction!” 

To be frank, the mystery group was no longer shocked by the man’s comments. At the end of the day, both Chief Kim and Mayor Lee heavily relied on the creatures to gain tourist attraction. 

“Hey guys, I think I found something.” Heeseung managed to pry your attention away from the officer, his hands motioning over the road that you had driven on earlier. 

“Y/n, let me borrow your phone.” Without hesitation, you tossed your phone to him. He turned on the camera, and the shutter of the photograph broke the silence of the night. Heeseung turned back his attention to his friends, displaying proudly the image he had managed to capture. 

“Tire tracks?” Sunghoon held the phone closer, and saw the patterns of the tires painted on the road. 

“But ghosts don’t have tracks?” Sunoo looked at his older friends with no response. 

“Exactly,” Before Jungwon could continue his thought, your ringtone broke him off from doing so. Heeseung, who still had your phone, answered the call to place it on speaker. 

“Hey y/n, this is Jaehyun. I wanted to remind you about our very wonderful date for tomorrow at the Delia Diner.” You didn’t even get to react before reaching out to get your phone and pry it away from Heeseung. 

“I-um, J-” Your stutters managed to do nothing and eventually Jaehyun hung off with a “see you later babe.” 

“Heeseung I can explain,” all of your friends turned in the other direction. Heck, everyone besides probably Jake and Heeseung himself were aware of your feelings towards the oldest member. 

“He sounds great y/n, make sure to order the chocolate shake though, it’s better than the vanilla one.” 

“You want me to go on the date?” The hurt in your tone was noticeable, but to a very dense Heeseung, it didn’t mean much. 

“We should head home.” Jake gave you a light pat on the back and led you back to the car with the others; Heeseung slowly trailed behind. 

------ 

“The doorknobs are missing?” Sunoo inspected all the doors of the city hall, finding no trace of the regular crystal like knobs. 

“They’ve gone missing all over town. It’s at the museum too.” Jungwon stood next Sunoo, pacing his eyes between the door and his friends. 

“Too bad for old Mr.Lee,” behind them stood Mr.Xiang, a man who seemed too happy at the sudden disappearance of the door knobs, “remember missing stuff means angry voters.” 

“I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s the robber.” 

“You can’t just go around accusing him,” Jake tried to ration with his 02 companion, but had no luck when Jungwon spoke again. 

“I think Sunghoon’s right. At the end of the day, he’ll benefit from all of this.” 

“The only way to be sure is if we trap him right?” Heeseung showed up a proud smirk before skipping down to his van to retrieve all of the items he needed. 

------ 

“Too bad y/n missed out on the fun of setting a trap.” Sunoo mentioned sarcastically before staring at the shark tank in the middle of the room. 

“Jake, you look quiet today.” Sunghoon pestered his friend, who since the night before had been filled with a blank expression. 

“Is this about...no...what...Jake…for a moment I thought you might be upset over y/n’s date. How dumb of me.” Jake remained silent; he’d rather not mix his confusing teen emotions with the business at hand. 

“But I’m sure she’s having fun on her date.” Heeseung managed a response to Sunoo’s earlier comment, and continued on with his mission of untangling some ropes. 

Meanwhile, you were clearly not having any fun. You’d almost think that Jaehyun had bailed on your date, seeing as though half an hour had already passed by. You were getting impatient; there was some trucker guy trying to kill you and your friends, yet you were here waiting for a guy your parents had chosen. 

------ 

“What is the meaning of this!?” Mayor Lee hung on top of the shark tank; he was loosely held by a chord and couldn’t manage to bring himself down. 

“We thought you were Mr.Xiang, he’s the trucker.” 

“Non-sense Heeseung. You and your friends' imagination is too strong, now get me down!” In the background, Mr.Xiang was seen in the shadows, strolling by casually. 

Heeseung and his friends abandoned the post after letting down his father, following behind Mr.Xiang who was inside his small car. 

“For a villain, I would assume his car would be cooler.” Eventually, his car got lost in the blanket of fog, but luckily, the van stopped right in front of the ghost of the truck. 

“This is our chance, hurry.” 

“What happened to staying alive?” Sunoo and Jungwon didn’t manage to have an opinion before Jake and Sunghoon dragged them from the van. 

They inspected it carefully, inclusively a smudge revealed that it had been recently touched up with paint. Still, nothing else was achieved before the group found themselves once more fleeing from the scene, however now in a backwards direction. 

The truck roared and pushed the van in reverse; the cliff leaving in a dent in the front side of the poor van. With fright, the five boys shouted at the top of their lungs, but managed to stop when Heeseung turned off the front lights and hid in the small road to head to your supposed date. 

------ 

“Hey sorry I’m late, work got busy.” Jaehyun took a seat in front of you and managed to go by without noticing you rolling your eyes. 

“I’m starving.” With no warning, his hands revoked the plate from your hands to dig into the order of fries. 

He continued to eat, and managed a word or two between mouthfuls. Thankfully, your five friends arrived on time, and broke you away from the date. 

“Can’t you see we’re on a date?” 

“Sorry Jaehyun, but my friends are in an emergency. Guess we’ll continue some other time.” 

“Woah, sick bucket hat.” Heeseung complimented your date, and discussed his appreciation for the outfit that Jaehyun had worn. 

“Y/n, you mind? I forgot my wallet at home.” Just great, first he arrives late, and now he pulls this stunt. It didn’t take long for Jaehyun to finally leave, but Jake waved a cd with the familiar JK stamped on the front. 

When you had made your way to the van, the cd played the recording. 

“Hello my fellow friends. If you want to solve this mystery, you have to follow the fog, and remember some diamonds can open a lot of doors. Happy hunting.” 

“Come on, we have to go back.” This time, the blanket of fog led to a canyon. The marble rock gleaming a bright purple given the time of day. Using your limited light, you managed to reach into a crevice that contained a lever. Pulling it back, an entrance to the cave revealed itself. 

“Woah, this would make a sick hangout.” 

“Yep, just us and a few thousand doorknobs.” A couple of piles with crystal doorknobs became emphasized with the moonlight shining in. Sunghoon’s hands graced over a book, and within it, a confession to a diamond robbery. 

“He stole it. Mr.Xiang’s father is confessing to the crime in black and white.” Jungwon held onto the book, but didn’t get far into reading, when the earlier roar once again cried in the depths of the cave. 

“Hurry!” Heeseung took control over the van, heading back to town at the fastest pace that he could. The frontside of the phantom truck grabbed onto the tires of your van, sliding the car further back. Heeseung, having been in this situation at least two times before, skated off the frontside, and managed to turn the car to face forwards.

“How do we get off his trail?” 

“Head to your trap Heeseung!” Listening to Jungwon’s order, the van began to drive onto the streets, diminishing and destroying whatever objects were in the way. Eventually, the van pulled into the city hall. 

“Now.” Grabbing a straw, Sunghoon shot at the record player, the disk spinning far enough to cut the rope that would catapult the truck. That it did. 

The phantom truck was swung backwards, landing on the top and the driver’s seat missing the shark tank by a slight inch. 

“I heard a monstrous noise, tell me it’s true!” Mayor Lee displayed Chief Kim’s earlier reaction; a tourist attraction brightened his gloomy face. 

“We caught the ghost trucker, and it’s none other than Mr.Xiang.” Unlike what you had expected, Jaehyun came crawling out of the machine. 

“Jaehyun!?” He fell hard onto the marbled floor, dusting himself as he got back onto his feet. 

“That’s right, and I would’ve gotten away with it too, if it wasn’t for my meddling date and her obnoxious friends.” 

“It makes sense. When Jaehyun had heard about the missing diamond Mr.Xiang’s father had stolen, he went looking for it. Remember JK’s clue, ‘a diamond can open doors,’ he had the diamond as a door knob, but because he never specified, you stole them all. You stole the crystal door knobs and smuggled them in a truck.” 

“But why, you’re rich?” Jaehyun preferred to give no response and was led off by the authorities. 

“I must say son, you managed to bring back the missing treasure, I’m happy.” 

“Does this mean you support my dreams for mysteries and traps?” Mayor Lee responded with a hard no, and made his way back to his office. 

------- 

“Since Mr.Xiang has pulled from the race, I am happy to say I will be once more serving as your proud Mayor AND, that MY son, future mayor of Seoul, Heeseung has managed to return the missing diamond to us along with his friends.” The crowd erupted into cheers and applause, eating up every word that Heeseung’s father had managed. 

You made your way back to the van before being stopped by Jake who held out a bracelet to you. You looked at his eyes, and saw a small smile forming on his face. 

“I thought you might like it.” 

“Thanks Jake, I love it.” You admired the white chain hanging on your left wrist before welcoming him into a hug. Maybe Jake had gained more than just a solved mystery. 

-------- 

Note: Jay and Niki will be added to the story as the plot progresses. Jay to be added more into the next chapter! 

P.S: My asks should be open lol, and I was wondering if people would like a taglist lol, but feel free to send a message or suggestion! :) <3 

[halstudandruz]

One of a Kind

*Not my gif*

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Requested: Yes

Prompt: Will and the team are there for Jay after his loss

Warnings: Talk of death, grieving, mourning

A/N: Written in Jay’s POV

I stood staring at the newly covered grave. I couldn’t believe this was reality. Being a cop myself I should’ve realized it was possible. I’ve been beaten, I’ve been shot, I’ve witnessed it all, but for some reason I never believed it would happen to her. Yet, here I stood hovered over my wife’s grave. I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t pull myself away. So here I sat, three hours after the funeral refusing to leave. Talking to her. Reminiscing on our entire relationship. You could tell me I was talking to myself, but I knew I wasn’t. I knew she was listening right there with me.

“Jay…” I heard behind me causing me to jump, pulling me out of my thoughts. I turned to see Will standing in the darkness behind me, “What are you still doing here?” He asked hesitantly. It had been atleast two hours since he had left me to have my last moment, but I’m guessing he had gotten concerned whenever I made it back to his place.

“I..I can’t do it man..I can’t leave her here..” I croaked out causing him to sigh. Will sat down beside me throwing his arm around my shoulders squeezing them not making me move. 20 minutes later I heard the crunching of leaves behind me this time. I turned to see the team walking up as I looked over at Will.

“I figured you needed the support, and we never got to take a chance with just all of us.” Will explained. Very soon everyone was crowded around me beers in hand.

“Remember when she just about threw down with that girl at Molly’s for hanging on Jay.” Kim laughed taking another drink of her beer.

“I warned her that my girlfriend was a badass she didn’t listen.” I shrugged smiling at the memory.

“Remember how she just about killed Ruz for getting drunk before we made it to the reception.” Kevin laughed.

“On my defense she was one of the ones feeding me drink after drink!” Adam held his hands up in defense.

“Bro you’re lucky you didn’t fall over during pictures!” Will retorted.

“I hope I’m half as beautiful as she was that day.” Hailey sighed sadly.

“I will never forget the first day she walked into my office. I knew we were in for one from the start. I’m surprised the district never went up in flames with both her and Erin working there.” Hank joked.

“Nobody would ever talk down on female cops in the presence of those two.” Al shook his head grinning as he remembered some of the things my wife had said in response to some of the suspects.

Eventually all of the stories died down and we were left with silence. A mix between comfortable but overwhelming sadness. “You know she was always on me for being too impulsive. Who knew I should’ve been the one on her.” I said breaking the silence.

“Jay, you know it’s not your fault.” Adam replied knowing where I was going.

“I should’ve been there. If I would’ve just woken up we would’ve driven to work together like every other day and I would’ve been there.” I answered hanging my head. On the way to work that morning [Y/N] had driven past a gas station where she saw a robbery going down. So, in she went. Which ended in her being shot. Normally we would’ve driven together, but I didn’t feel good so I told her I’d be in later. If I would’ve just gotten up. If I would’ve just gone to work I would’ve been there. If she would’ve called for back up she would still be here. She knew better than to run in, and yet she did. “I just can’t believe this is happening. We were just planning on having a family. I planned to grow old with her and now we’re here.” I ran a hand down my face already used to the tears that have covered it all day.

“I know..and we’re all here for you.” Will replied.

“I can’t lose another person. I can’t do it. I don’t have enough strength left.” I cried jaw clenching.

“It may not feel like it right now, but you do. The fact that you’re even getting through this right now shows you do. We get it. We miss her already, and these last few days have been hell for all of us to begin with let alone you, but we have to keep moving forward. That’s the only choice we have.” Kim cried along with me.

“Eventually you’ll be able to move on. That doesn’t mean you’re forgetting her or replacing her by any means though.” Kevin added.

“I just don’t understand how I could ever love someone as much as I loved her again.” I admitted reaching down to place my hand on the dirt.

“It won’t be the same. No one will ever amount to her honestly. We all know that. She was definitely one of a kind, but it gets easier buddy.” Hank came to kneel beside me making me feel just a little more at ease knowing he had been through the same thing.

“We’re going to be here the whole time, and we will damn sure guarantee she’s with us everyday moving forward and you know she will be. She couldn’t be away from you for a second to begin with.” Adam, my wife’s partner, rolled his eyes causing me to laugh at all the memories of Adam pulling her away from my desk to get stuff done. As I stood up walking away with everyone else I still had a ping of anxiety rolling in my stomach, but they had to remind me that she wasn’t really here. That she was with me no matter where I went, and I knew that would be the only thing to get me through the rest of my life. In the back of my head I knew at some point I would continue on with my life, which is what she would’ve wanted me to do. Which she told me numerous times whenever we had late night talks before going to sleep. That I would find someone else, but I also knew half of my heart would be reserved for [Y/N] and only her and nothing would ever change that. I knew nothing would ever make me feel the same way as she did, but I was okay with that. I wouldn’t want anything else or anyone else to make me feel that exact same way because Hank was right. She was special. One of a kind, and as long as I had the people beside me I loved most I could get through it.

[ladyherenya]

Books read in July

With one or two exceptions, these were books were sources of FEELINGS.

Favourite cover: The Enigma Game, nut most of these covers are a good fit for the stories they represent.

Reread: “The Marriage of Mary Russell” by Laurie R. King, “Something Worth Doing” by Elizabeth and I also listened to quite a bit of Code Name Verity (by the same).

Also read: “Monster” by Naomi Kritzer.

Still reading:  A Wizard’s Guide to Defensive Baking by T. Kingfisher.

Next up: Stars Above by Marissa Meyer.

(Longer reviews on LibraryThing and Dreamwidth.)

*

Descendant of the Crane by Joan He (narrated by Nancy Wu): Princess Hesina of Yan, believing her father to be murdered, opens an investigation into his death. She’s driven by her aching grief and by her fierce desire for truth and justice -- for all her people, as well as in this matter of her father’s death. But the truth is much harder than she expects. I thought this was incredible, but sometimes stressful! Compelling characters, complex family dynamics (I especially liked the sibling relationships), intricate prose and worldbuilding, and startling twists that turned out to slot neatly in with the other puzzle pieces.

Riviera Gold by Laurie R. King: This takes place in July 1925, immediately after Island of the Mad. Mary Russell leaves Venice for Monaco, hoping to see her former housekeeper -- and discovers that Mrs Hudson has been accused of murder. As always, I love Russell's first person narration and her observations of the world around her. The historical scenery is particularly vivid: cliffs and ocean views, the Monte Carlo casino, expats with questionable pasts and connections, smugglers, Jazz Age artists, bronze casting. Moreover, it’s all relevant to the mystery Russell is unravelling. I also liked the indications that Russell and Holmes’ unconventional marriage works for them.

Fireweed by Jill Paton Walsh: A short bittersweet novel from 1969  about two runaway evacuees living on the streets of London during the Blitz. It’s very vivid, particularly the details about wartime London -- but there’s also a thread of ambiguity, because the narrator is looking back on a time he doesn’t fully remember and didn’t always understand. In the end, that becomes a bit unsatisfying, yet I like how the story allows one to fill in some of the gaps for oneself. I wish I had discovered this at thirteen -- I’d have appreciated it even more and been fascinated by the experience of fending for oneself.

Aurora Burning by Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff: After everything that happened in Aurora Rising, Squad 312 have been labelled traitors but they are not going to let that stop them from saving the world. This is fast-paced, with some excellent twists and frustrating developments. Sometimes the action was engaging; other times my eyes glazed over. Sometimes the multiple POV was a strength; other times I felt it hindered me from becoming really attached to anyone. Sometimes I was amused by the characters, and other times the qualities which make them amusing became irritating. I think the things I liked outweighed the things I didn’t care for?

The A.I. Who Loved Me by Alyssa Cole: Trinity is working from home after a traumatic accident when she meets her neighbour’s strange nephew, Li Wei. This science-fiction romance has mystery, humour and moments of very pointed commentary. I enjoyed Li Wei working out how to act like a human again, and the interactions with Penny, the Home AI assistant. There is more going on here than either Trinity or Li Wei initially realises, which is great --- but that reveal indicates that some important, interesting parts of this story have been glossed over. I might have liked this more if the flashbacks had been expanded.

“Monster” by Naomi Kritzer (from Clarkesworld Magazine, issue 160): This alternates between Cecily’s time in China, looking for an old school friend, and the history of that particular friendship. I don’t regret reading (well, listening to) this, but I don’t know if I liked it. It is tense and uneasy, and left me wishing I had someone with whom I could discuss interpretations of the ending’s implications.

Gravity is the Thing by Jaclyn Moriarty (narrated by Aimee Horne): This grew on me. In the end, I loved it. For twenty years, Abigail’s been sent chapters of a mysterious self-help book. The story alternates between the present, as Abigail learns more about The Guidebook, and her reflections about her past -- particularly her brother, her marriage, being a single mother. At times this story is uncomfortable but the way everything is drawn together -- and seeing Abigail make sense of her life -- was unexpectedly satisfying. Compelling. I also liked the Australian setting, the Aussie audiobook narrator, some of the whimsical parts and how Maybe The Real Treasure Was the Friends We Made Along the Way.

The Enigma Game by Elizabeth Wein: Like The Pearl Thief, this is a prequel/companion novel to Code Name Verity. In late 1940, nineteen year old Jamie is an RAF pilot in northern Scotland. His friend Ellen, a driver for the aerodrome, is staying at the same pub as Louisa (newly-orphaned, half-Jamaican), who is caring for an elderly German woman. Together they discover a way to keep Jamie’s squadron ahead of the Germans. I loved this. A powerful exploration of identity, secrets and the problems of prejudice. I was delighted (and also devastated) by how this story fits in with Code Name Verity. The bits about flying are lovely.

Hamster Princess: Giant Trouble by Ursula Vernon (aka T. Kingfisher): After Ratpunzel, Harriet’s next adventure involves magic beans, a giant bunny and a hamster who wants to form a band. There is something very soothing about making tea. You have to concentrate on the whole process, and then you have tea. Even someone as decisive as Harriet had to make tea sometimes and think things through.

Kind of Cursed by Stephanie Fournet: Millie has been dealing with a lot -- losing her parents, gaining guardianship of her younger siblings, a miscarriage and a relationship break-up. She’s decided to avoid men for the next decade. But it’s hard to avoid Luc, who is overseeing the renovation of Millie’s kitchen. Watching Millie find the support, comfort and happiness she so desperately needs gave me warm fuzzy feelings. This has the right I-need-a-hug-vibe, the right ratio of emotional hurt/comfort, for me. In another story, I might have had issues with how quickly the romance becomes a serious relationship, but the characters’ choices made sense in context.

Fall Semester by Stephanie Fournet: This romance between a depressed literature professor and a graduate student with a terminally-ill father was an interesting experience because I was aware of its weaknesses and yet it was such a compelling dose of FEELINGS that I really enjoyed reading it. I also have something of a soft spot for stories about universities -- and perhaps was feeling tolerant, knowing it was the author’s first novel. (Weaknesses included: the prose style is serviceable but bland, an odd fit for protagonists with backgrounds in literature/poetry; their serious issues deserved more focus; and some of Malcolm’s reactions have uncomfortable overtones of entitlement.)

You First by Stephanie Fournet: More compelling feelings, which kept me reading, but in hindsight, didn’t completely sell me on the age-gap or the short time-frame. If only it hadn’t largely skipped over showing the characters navigating an interesting challenge introduced in the final act in favour of an epilogue which picks up some time later! Seriously, if you’re going to throw in that particular complication, then I at least want to watch them deal with it. I’m not grumbling too much. I cared enough about seeing the characters’ situations improve, which counts for something. And what did I expect, reading three romance novels in a row?

Like No Other by Una LaMarche: Two teenagers meet in a New York hospital elevator during a blackout. Devorah is a Hasidic Jew, Jaxon is black. Devorah is not allowed to socialise with boys outside of her family, let alone anyone outside her community, but she and Jaxon keep finding ways to see each other. This was fascinating, but also frustrating -- I was frustrated with Devorah’s culture for making her feel like she would be disowned if she put a foot wrong, and also frustrated, perhaps unfairly, with Jaxon for not fully appreciating the risks Devorah faces. However I liked the ending a lot.

[moralanxietystudio]

“An RPG / Visual Novel / text adventure hybrid” is a mouthful - Roadwarden Devlog

In her Rock, Paper, Shotgun article, Jay Castello has mentioned:

The game’s genre is purposefully fluid. On (...) Studio’s website, the top frequently asked question says “I can’t figure out what is this game’s genre,” to which they’ve cheerfully replied “Me neither.”

When I mention Roadwarden in my Facebook posts or on Twitter, I usually struggle describing it. I keep saying things like “RPG / Visual Novel / text adventure hybrid”, but it’s not very... marketable. I like to use “interactive fiction”, which is arguably correct and sounds fine, but it doesn’t explain well what the player does in the game.

The main goal of this post is to sink deeper into this topic: how could we label Roadwarden? And what it actually is?

By the way, during the next couple of days I want to update the game’s demo. It’s going to be awesome.

Why am I looking for a label?

Why is the label important? Is it just because it’s convenient for social media ads?

When we categorize a game, we also set up the player’s expectations. If we call a game an endless runner, we make a promise. We claim that it’ll be easy to learn and hard to master, with a very stable pacing, without pointless plot and accessible from your phone. Sure, some endless runners can diverse from this premise or even completely fail at executing it, but making this label is an act of communication. Here is what I have to offer. Are yo interested?

And while Roadwarden fits into various definitions of specific genres, it makes promises that are not as commonly associated with its labels. It has an experimental approach to role-playing. Violence, that’s always plot-related and significant, not grindy. Exploration of a grim, detailed and consistent setting, but not a very heroic one. Dialogues used as the core of the experience, not just a tool. Humble adventures of a regular person in a world that overwhelms it. And I try to avoid common tropes in my story.

And I never ask myself “is it OK to add this new feature? after all, it’s not popular in this genre!”. I add everything that helps me make a better game. I put the experience above the marketing convenience.

A term “video game RPG” is famous for being a very vague label, pretty much impossible to define. It’s one of the most diverse branches of gaming. Every person plays RPGs for different reasons, thou we could probably make a list like 1) a complex story with possible side quests, 2) some character progression (both story-wise and through XP-like mechanics), 3) combat and exploration. If you prefer western games, you’ll probably enjoy 4) having important decisions. And you probably like 5) fantasy, eventually science-fiction with fantasy elements.

Sure, there’s a lot of variety - we have action RPGs, text-based RPGs, tactical RPGs, dungeon crawlers, rouge-likes... It’s really weird that the same label somehow covers The Witcher 3, Undertale, Final Fantasy VI and Wizardry from 1981, yet not Far Cry Primal, but that’s because these games are classified by an objective definition of a genre. We just try to say: “if you like X, you may also like Y. they’re kind of similar”.

Roadwarden as an RPG

When I develop Roadwarden I’m interested in things that most RPGs consider unimportant. And I don’t mean something like “I care about story, and These Other Games are all about combat”! That would be a silly statement. But I put an emphasis on aspects of the story which are often marginalized.

For example, in most RPGs you simply kill things (in self-defense!) and grind XP to get stronger. You can kill 10 packs of wolves and 25 boars and it means absolutely nothing. You’re just overcoming a barrier while trying to get a new level or reach the other side of the forest. Killing these enemies won’t be considered animal cruelty. Won’t destroy the balance of the nearby forests. Won’t starve the villagers. These animals are not Really a part of the story.

In Roadwarden, bandits don’t randomly spawn and die without influencing the plot. They are not some random loot waiting to drop on the floor for the player’s convenience. They have families, friends, goals, story behind them. They don’t want to kill you - they want your stuff. And they’ll try to rob you only if they know you can’t beat them. Without an unfair advantage they wouldn’t put themselves at risk.

In my game, violence means something. Nobody here dreams about it, aside of the most terrible, wicked people. Every death leaves a void, and void should be haunting.

In most RPGs you find a tavern, buy a potion and leave. In Roadwarden you spend 15 minutes talking to the innkeeper, and he’s not there just to give you a quest. He wants to know more about you. He wants to know what news you’re bringing. And if you can be trusted.

Also, potions in this game are rare and have taste. And aroma.

Your character isn’t going to have one hundred thousand coins at the end of the game, nor murder two thousand creatures to save a village inhabited by 30 NPCs. They characters are not waiting for The Chosen One or a master of martial marts that can save them. You’re just someone who tries to change your own life by doing something risky, in a realm that’s filled with people who don’t even know if they want you here.

Your character is a part of the world they live in. And I think most RPGs don’t do a good work reflecting this idea. Immersion should be something more than the constant pursue of better graphics, cinematics and more “freedom”.

So while Roadwarden is still a game that includes combat, trade, exploration, unlocking new abilities and building your character, it’s all put in a new context. And there’s a good chance that a portion of RPG fans wouldn’t be satisfied with something this different. I try to encourage them to take a look... But I don’t want anyone to feel cheated.

Roadwarden as a Visual Novel

Roadwarden may also not be a perfect fit for many Visual Novel fans, even though it involves a lot of narration, descriptions and dialogues supported by limited visuals. Roadwarden has fewer gameplay elements than most RPGs, but way more than most VNs - it even introduces simple survival mechanics.

Also, the story is non-linear - it’s very complex (what doesn’t mean “long”) and modified by how the player moves around the map. Many VNs introduce story branching, but I’m pushing it unusually far. And, of course, Roadwarden has way more choices than most VNs, even though some of these choices are focused on role-playing alone and don’t impact the game’s mechanics.

Not only that, but the visual style and the lack of common tropes that are appealing for the core VN-fanbase can be a big problem. I was even asked a couple of times if my game will involve any romantic relationships. Sure, there are successful VNs that don’t involve porn (VA-11 Hall-A), romance (Ace Attorney), manga-style drawings (Cinders), nor Best Girls, so I’m not saying it’s impossible to make one and prosper. But it’s playing against the odds.

All these things push me into being very careful here, and I usually feel that I should say something like “it’s a Visual Novel, BUT...”

Roadwarden as an adventure game

So let’s make a step back. There’s an argument to be made that Visual Novels are a sub-genre of (or rather, an evolution of) a more interactive label. Here’s how Wikipedia defines the adventure games:

(...) a video game in which the player assumes the role of a protagonist in an interactive story driven by exploration and puzzle-solving.

That works, doesn’t it? It’s also fair to say that such a definition is very vague and doesn’t even exclude RPGs or games like Half-Life. Quest for Glory series, for example, is usually considered to have “RPG elements” or gets classified as a hybrid of both an adventure game and an RPG.

This vagueness opens adventure games for many subgenres, and Roadwarden graciously falls into a couple of them at once. It has scenes with text parsers, typical for interactive fiction, but its advanced dialogue choices could even categorize it as digital gamebook (CYOA-like). Probably a better option for us is a “graphic adventure game”, since there are Some graphics and few ways to interact with the game - parsers, in-game “buttons”, dialogue choices.

I have a pleasure to be a part of few adventure game communities and there’s usually a small range of titles that are constantly mentioned as the “classic” adventure games. Point & clicks (Monkey Island, Grim Fandango), graphic games with parsers commands (King’s Quest), sometimes games like Myst...

Text adventure games, while accepted, are not really discussed often. And it’s difficult to make silly memes about them, so they are a bit obsolete. However, a group focused specifically on text adventure games really doesn’t care about graphics.

It feels to me like there Should be a spectrum of graphics vs. text, and of visible interface vs. text parsers. But it’s not the case. Text adventures and graphic adventures are almost in different worlds - not because of what they are, but rather because of what communities surround them. And, once again, Roadwarden is in between. It’s not just a hybrid of an RPG and an adventure game, it’s also a hybrid of a text adventure game and a graphic adventure game.

Roadwarden is a hybrid, and that’s not sexy

In conclusion, here are some of the genres that I think are strongly present in Roadwarden:

· RPG;

· Visual Novel;

· text adventure game;

· graphic adventure game;

· digital gamebook.

Also, I heard opinions that “it feels a lot like a tabletop RPG”. What makes me happy, since it’s intentional.

Some of my game’s features are not exclusive to any specific genre. All of the labels I’ve listed tend to be story-heavy and support their plot with dialogues (or even narration), often include inventory management, allow you to role-play a protagonist and tend to use fantasy settings. Others, however, are genre specific: parsers, open world exploration, mechanically progressing protagonist, simplified visuals, resource management...

Roadwarden is a hybrid, what means it’s going to have a problem appealing to fans of a specific genre. Yet, at the same time, it’s a game that’s not restricted by its labels - and I don’t think genres should limit our designs. My game can include all the things it needs. It can be unusual, experiment and creatively look for new ways to explore.

I just hope I can earn your trust.

[morgansmornings]

ship meme Jayden and Beth

leaves their dirty clothes on the floor:

It was hard to tell who’s clothes belonged to who. Red, greens, and blues clashed with pastel and paisley. Skirts and jeans tossed about being left where they landed. Fabrics of all sorts scattered and making a collage of colour across the dark brown floor that was standard within the dorms of the campus. 

“Beth…. Have you seen my green shirt?” 

Wha kine?

“The green spaghetti strap. I want to wear it for my date tonight.”

A pause, the shift of an over sized sweater being pulled around tawny slender shoulders. 

Nooo…

“Are you lying?” 

Nooo…

“Are you lying about lying.”

Mebbe…

A sigh.

“Blue one it is then.” 

forgets to run the dish washer:Neat freak. Organized. Dishwasher always running both us stairs and down stairs to keep up with the health standards. 

At least that was how it usually was. 

But there were times that the Janissary couldn’t be assed to use Forces or Correspondence to poke one stupid button. It was usually after covert missions where she had the hardest time having the will to do much of anything but breathe. During those times she had given Beth permission to make sure that the mountains of leftovers found homes in the bellies of those that needed it most. 

On this night however, Jay was not as bad off as she usually was. No, this night she was just tired. Prue was off digging into a rumor to see if it was something that she could deal with at a later date or not. So she had the brownstone to herself. Finally a moment to unwind. To come down from the soul crushing pain that was both inflicted to her prey and that she received herself. 

She pulled the dishwasher open, taking a cup from the top rack and poured herself a healthy amount of cold coffee. She reached up and scratched the back of her feeling the grime clinging to her skin. Taking a long pull she immediately turned and spit the mouthful out. 

“God… Damnit.” She held back the sudden urge to gag as the taste of dish soap. 

“I love her… I love her so much Andy…” Jay whipped the back of her hand across her lips. “One of these days, I might strangle her.”

Though it wasn’t Beth’s fault. She did wash the dishes. She just forgot that the dishwasher was there to make things easier. pumps gas for the car:“Onna d’ese days, I’m gonna do it.” Beth said curling her legs under herself to rearrange the knitting supplies she had brought with her. 

“I’ll let you pump gas into the Caddy the day you can see over the wheel kid.” A ball of yarn bounced off the door. Jay couldn’t help but chuckle. With all the powers Beth had it was a miracle she was still the same sweet tiny and innocent soul in the world. Jay was certain that Beth could achieve peace among the others and bring the Wyrm to heel and purify whatever had driven it off the deep end. 

There was some mumbling that Jay chose not to make out because they wee already behind their, her, schedule. It was going to be a long drive to the east coast. Sure Jay could have gotten tickets, but there was not enough tranquilizers to put Beth to sleep long enough to fly that distance. Which is why there was a cruise bound for Hawai’i waiting for them in California. drives when they’re going somewhere:

“And then when we get there… Beth are you even listening to me?” 

“Mm-hmm.” 

“Really?” 

“Mm-hmm.” That was the moment Jayden pulled over into a parking lot. She knew Beth wasn’t paying attention. That much was obvious by how she was leaned against the passenger door with her chin propped on a delicate palm. Green-hazel eyes were glazed over not yet realizing that they had stopped. Jay reached over and took Beth’s hand in hers, tugging gently.

“Hey Tiny Dancer?” 

“Huh?” The Hawaiian turned to look at her best friend over many lifetimes. “Did we stop?”

“Figured we could stretch our legs. And after…” Jay shrugged a shoulder and pulled her hand away leaving the keys in Beth’s hand. 

“But ya alw-”

“I’m tired.” She wasn’t. “Not safe for me to be behind the wheel Tiny Dancer.” 

A light began burning that settled whatever worry had come over the Janissary.

“Copy d’at Rubba Ducky.” 

rearranges the furniture:It was mapped out clearly in her mind. To the point that she could walk around with her eyes closed and not once drop, trip, kick, or stumble over anything. Every item had a place and every item was kept just so. Even when she cleaned. Some called it obsession. Other called it a well maintained lifestyle. 

So when Jayden opened the door and dropped her keys to the floor she knew something was wrong. Looking around her living room, pool table, and most of the bedding from her guest and master bedroom was strewn about. Cushions and fabrics lay draped up over each other and her staircase leading up to the master bedroom floor had been turned into a keep of sorts. 

“Beth?” 

“D’e no be a Beth. Bu’ Lady WiggleWag an’ her fai’ful sworn hound Bitestwice.” 

“Don’‘t forget me!” 

“An’ Lord Noah of da far off lands to the South.” 

“Beth.” 

“Have ya tribute ta lay before mah noble feet?” 

“Beth!” 

“Wha?!” 

“Next time, just text me when you plan on babysitting.” Jay shook her head shrugging out of the leather coat she was wearing. Next came the heeled boot. “But if the Lady, Noble Knight, and High guard dog would allow, the council hath sent me, a humble peasant to bring tribute of cake and cocoa.” 

There was a moment of muttering, hushed giggles, and the soft bouf of Prue before she was answered. 

“Da lord bide ya welcome, stranger. As long as d’ere be ice cream.” 

“But of course.”

falls asleep with the TV on:Beth had always had a hard time sleeping. The Sandman kept away from her and when he did come, so did the Night terrors. Which is why Beth was always working strange hours at the hospital. Or going on late night ride alongs with Luc.  But on occasion there was a movie night. 

And this time, the soft sounds of Beth’s little voice spoke along with Inigo Montoya as he advanced upon the six fingered man. She mimicked his elegant moves with her own hands. Thrust. Parry. Block, slash, parry. Her slender form twisting on the recliner only once nudging the familiar once.

She turned to take Jay’s hand to find the younger woman asleep on the other recliner. one foot thrown over the arm, her head lolled off to the side and one hand still in the mixing bowl of Popcorn and M&Ms. 

“Good Night Jay. I mos’ likely kill you in da mornin’.” gets to use the bathroom first:Pulling herself up and out of the chair every joint she had creaked and popped as protest. Shuffling more in the style of a zombie rather then a human being she headed upstairs for the master bathroom. One hand ran through her hair  to push it from her face. She could already smell the coffee which meant Prue had set it up before the sleep over ended.

Rounding over the last step she could hear her shower going. A raised brow, a deep frown, and one arm crossing over her chest to scratch the back of her shoulder. The Janissary pushed the door open with a yawn. Sitting on the counter, a toothbrush moving with far more vigor than was humanly possible at this early time of the morning. “Dude, did you even sleep?”

“MMM!!” 

“Sorry. Knock first I know. But you’re dressed and a nurse. This isn’t the first time another woman has walked in on you.” “Mmm!” A finger waved way too close to Jay’s face for comfort. 

“Alright downstairs it is. But I’ll remember that the next time you have to piss.” Jay moved just fast enough to dodge the tube of toothpaste. But not the bar of soap that came right after. decides the temperature for the ac/heater:“Beth… it is 89 degrees. How can you be cold?” 

“Please?” 

“Oh.. My Gods okay! Fine!” Jayden flipped the switch for the seats heating coils built into the Cadillac. “Now flip the vents on your side so I can run the AC.” 

“But d’at doesn’t..” 

“Ah! Tch!” A hand puppet came up from the steering wheel. “I don’t want to hear it. I’m hot. Driver gets control that was the deal.” 

“Okay, but ya have any kine blanket?”

A pause. A sigh. 

“For the last time… NO!” sets up holiday decorations:When Christmas comes to town

The lights were strung over all the windows. Garland hung from the banister and the pegs for the stair case. Gingerbread wafted through the air. The Polar Express was playing just loud enough that the girls could sing along.

And all the dreams of the children

Flour coated the front of Jay’s apron, while steady hand folded the shortbread batter together. Small feet galumphed around chasing the clicking of sharp nails. The youngest chuckled at the panicked look in betrayed dark eyes. 

“Don’t look at me, you promised.”  

Once lost will all be found

“Traitor!” A pathetic whine came as the Hawaiian grabbed Prue from behind, with the over sized sweater. 

“Gotcha!”

It took several moments for Beth to bend in ways that would have been painful to others to get the familiar into the human made sweater. It was just this side of Ugly Christmas sweater. The soft fabric all hand woven from well kept and happy Angora Rabbits. 

That’s all I want when Christmas comes to town

leaves the lights on:Prue panted hard and heavy. She was struggling to stay up right but it was hard to do with a gaping hole that the burglar left as a parting gift. The storm raged outside and had knocked the power out a few minutes before hand. Limping across the wooden floor she collapsed not but three feet from the entrance. 

“Jay!” Beth’s voice echoed down the hall from the stairwell. At least that is what Prue assumed as she let out a whine. 

“Beth! Hurry! She’s been shot!” Jay all but sobbed as she dropped to her knees and began petting the dog’s head. 

“I..” 

“Beth please!” 

“Get da flashlights!” Jay nodded and turned on her phone’s light. She was speaking in half words and muted cries of heartbreak. Soon she started getting the mag lights to help illuminate the apartment. Soft but firm hands covered in some kind of gloves started prodding at the wound. Prue whimpered and yowled, but was not willing to snap out. 

“Jay, ya need for get me some candles.” Beth’s voice was a salve to adrenaline fried nerves. 

Minutes, hours it was hard to tell but the power came back on and Both Beth and Jay were sitting on the floor near the couch. Jay’s eyes were bloodshot while Beth’s were sympathetic. Even though all the lights were on, neither moved to turn off the flashlights or put out the candles. 

uses the bathroom with the door open:Beth always had the door closed when she went to the bathroom. It was habit. In through the door, turn, close, lock. When she was done it was unlock, open, and leave. Between the Admiral and her brother it was just a habit that had been instilled into her at a young age.

So imagine the heart attach she had the first time that she came back from class to find their shared bathroom wide open. And a nude Jayden backside pointed towards her. One strong leg propped on the bathroom ledge with razor in hand. 

“I’m sorry!: 

“Oh hey kid. Was wondering where you ran off too. Can you do me a favor and grab me my underwear. I left them on the dresser.” 

“I…” Beth learned and then made Jayden promise to never again, leave the bathroom door open after that. fixes the plumbing (or calls the plumber):

Beth reached as far as she could while keeping Jayden pinned onto the couch. It would be the best, fastest, and the least amount of explaining needed. Jay however was of the opinion that He was a last resort call. Plus it wasn’t like he wasn’t already there. Watching and waiting for the right moment to interrupt the squabbling. 

“I said no.” 

“But he’s good.” 

“No. I am not letting that happen.” 

“But d’ats my phone.” Jay put her hand in Beth’s face to try and push her away.

“Ow! Stop with the biting!” 

“Den gimme da phone.” 

“No! I’m not calling Clint!” 

“Good thing I’m standing right here then. Things would get a little awkward if the pipe keeps leaking and you both fall on the floor. Might give the next person the wrong impression.” 

“HOW?!” 

“I texted him before ya took my phone.” Beth said with a victorious tone as she gave a sun-bright smile. 

This Meme: Accepting.Honorable Mention: @brooklynislandgirl and @multi-mused

[dyketectivecomics]

So...what ARE you feelings on bruce being a Pisces? Let alone that Cass is an Aquarius, Dick is an Aries, Jason's a Leo and Tim's a cancer?

I slowly shut my laptop and set it aside on my bed, staring ahead at nothing in particular as I reminisce on a favorite Pisces in my life. My best friend since childhood, a girl who i’ve known for well over a decade, more than half of my life really, who happens to share the exact same birthday as Fictional Character Bruce Wayne. A Pisces-cusp.

I think on the similarities I see between them, the qualities of her character that only I and a few others would know, and try to think on how others have perceived her before joining our friend group over the years. I admire her empathy, her passion for music and video games, her willingness to put all of her friends above herself. 

And then i remember how she drunk-texted our group chat last night just to tell us she loved us & that she couldn’t wait to hit up a gay bar with us when we’re all back in town.

And I cackle. Because if no one else does, I do see these qualities in Bruce Wayne’s character. Just a hair below all the so-called brooding and angst. Bruce is a water sign who’s a little emotionally stunted in that he tries to hide his feelings, but he feels oh-so-very much. He’s a Pisces trying to emulate a Scorpio and falling just short (bc lets be real, he’s got too many kids that he definitely dotes on) but yknow… it’s something that when he’s done correctly by writers, they somehow manage to fit those qualities in without even realizing, I think. Sure, he’s not a kid that I grew up with and there’s plenty of differences because my friend is, yknow, an actual person who’s more than a couple of personality traits. But damn if I don’t see similarities….

Now, as for the rest of the kids & others that I relate them to… (under the cut, tagging as “long post” for mobile users just incase tumblr wants to be a butt again) Also a warning bc some of this will sound like I’m ripping from astrology sites but honestly just narrowed things down from my own personal experience with these signs. Take all of this observation & comparison with a grain of salt, if you wish.

Cass is an aquarius, like myself. And I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t see more than a few similarities in what few scattered stories I’ve been able to read so far (or even that I might be prone to reading a bit too much into some of it bc hey, I have a fav now & I want to see myself in her, sue me). One of these days I’m probably going to sit down and really dive in, but for now, I gather what I can, listen to the meta that others have, and ofc, try to form my own opinion. 

That being said, an eccentric-ass Aquarius is really the only choice to take over the mantle from a sensitive-ass Pisces, and everyone can fite me on this. Aquarians & Pisces, my friend and I, Bruce and Cass- all on a similar wavelength, esp when they’re encouraging each other and learning to grow from one another.

Cass is an air sign that most people only see as being grounded because of the discipline David Cain instilled in her from childhood. She’s funny, wise beyond her years, and intensely dedicated to the mission at hand bc of what it means to help others as a whole. And this is fault that I see in myself and in her: she’s got plenty of empathy for those she might already be close to, and absolutely cares about humanity in a greater sense, but caring for individuals without getting to know them can be uncomfortable. She’s driven, but can be blindsided by that dedication and burn herself out easily if others don’t intervene. Also, an introverted extrovert, one who’s absolutely ready to meet with others and collaborate/team-up, but can get a little lost in her own head from time-to-time.

…

Now, Dick the Aries. My other best friend since childhood also shares this sign with my First Favorite Robin. And I do see more than a number of parallels between the two of them. My aries friend has a penchant for taking over projects and setting themselves in charge of the operation. But they also have the charm and ingenuity to make themselves to seem the perfect and best fit for that leadership position. They’re rebellious, a little brash in decision-making, but they’ve also mellowed out over the years in many small ways. Still on fire about what they’re most passionate about in life, and more than willing to achieve it by any means necessary, damn anyone who thinks that they won’t.

There’s a popular consensus in fanon to make dick a kind of hufflepuff who’s just there for his friends & loves hugs and is lovey all around- but Dick is driven. He cares for his friends fiercely and will help them absolutely, but he’s ready to avenge them too. He’ll punch you in the face, pirouette with the utmost amount of sass, and then make you feel bad for making him do it in the first place. He’s got that bit of deviousness that will make you second guess his intentions. But if you’re already part of his inner circle, you have nothing to fear from him. And that’s where his lovey side then has room to come out.

…

Moving on to Jason the leo, and I know you didn’t ask, but Im adding Stephanie to this discussion as well since she’s a leo too. A few leos that I’ve gotten to know over the years can be summed up very lovingly as this: attention whores. (again. very lovingly. i love each and every one of those bitches so damn much, this is something they’ve each used to describe themselves lmao)

Leo is the King of the Zodiac, commanding attention in the room whenever they walk in. They’ve got plenty to say, of course, and they’re excellent diplomats/socialites in many ways. Often best suited for a leadership position. They know how to read the conversation and the room and turn it best into their favor. They will dazzle you with their wit and charm, but also in their knowledge of the subject at hand. If they have an Opinion, they’ll absolutely let you know what it is, and they’re not afraid to hold back on what they perceive to be a truth. Some will have a bit more tact than others, but they’re a fire sign, after all. 

Did this just describe Jason & Steph? well maybe not to some, but I definitely see their drive to complete their own missions & joining up Bruce’s crusade as Leo qualities. Steph and Jay are willing to do what it takes and butt heads with whoever they must if it means doing what they see is right. They’re absolutely social people too (maybe Steph a bit more than Jay will be), and you can’t deny they’ve both got a certain kind of charm over the rest of the family.

…

Tim the cancer sign… this is… difficult actually. One of the few signs that I don’t recall having significant interaction with. (& honestly the character & Robin that I have the least personal interest in. I do want to like him but I just…??? Havent rlly found the time to put into reading up on him more)

But just going off the water sign aspect, and knowing water signs in my life… Emotions & emotional intelligence are obviously going to be at the forefront. From what I’ve gathered on Tim, he’s very well-rounded in all areas of his life, and driven to succeed at whatever he’s set his mind to. I can absolutely respect the strength his character has commanded over the years, and his popularity is absolutely earned, I think. Writers have worked hard to make sure he’s distinct from Dick & Jason before him in many ways, and I’ll have to look deeper into his character & listen to more meta on him before I’ll be comfortable to speak further on that.

…

To round out this discussion, I want to bring Barbara into the mix, because she’s had a fixed birthday for awhile now. And tbh she’s just as much part of the family as the rest I think (yes, I know some people get Babs fatigue bc she’s the first batgirl & gets the other girls lost in the shuffle but hey! I’ve loved her for awhile now!) She is *drum roll* a Libra!

Now, this ones a bit tricky, bc the most important Libra in my life is my mom. Buuuut, she and Babs are both cusps… on opposite ends of this zodiac sign. I admire my mother for her resolve, inventiveness, work ethic, and stability. I also loathe her tendency to micromanage projects, become overly involved in the work of others (to the point where she WILL find out whats going wrong) and how she tends to overwork herself (just this past spring has been really really difficult. I’m surprised she hasn’t worked herself into the grave with the amount of stress she puts on herself)

Now some of these qualities, I absolutely see in Babs. But I also see a bit more awareness in her character, esp when she’s grown up into her Oracle persona. She seems able to recognize what she’s doing and how she’s affecting others, and will sometimes use that to her advantage. She’s a character who’s grown into the adversity she faces & doesnt let it change her resolve for completing the mission, even if it needs to be from a new (& probably better) angle. She adapts well to change, or forces the change to adapt to her. She is a force to be reckoned with and admired.

…

All of this to say… at the end of the day, the stars are still just balls of gas and light that sit some billion light-years away from us. Do they really control our personalities? I mean, probably not. But there’s enough similarities in those traits to make you wonder… and it’s honestly just a Good Fun Time regardless. 

[teenageread]

Review: Miracle Creek Christmas

Synopsis:

Riley Madigan escapes to the sleepy mountain town of Miracle Creek after her relationship with an A-list actor ends badly. At least for a time, she hopes her new job as a high school art teacher will bring her the peace and quiet she is looking for. The last thing on her mind is love.

Mark Rivers was a firefighter until he got trapped in a wildfire and suffered third-degree burns on his face and body. After a year of recovering, Mark is trying to piece his life back together but struggles both emotionally and psychologically. He’s been a recluse until he forces himself to attend his niece’s school play and sees Riley, the school’s art teacher. Immediately, Mark feels a connection to her. Maybe it’s the kind way she greets his niece or the way the art she created for the school play is reminiscent of his late mom’s artwork. Either way, Mark feels driven to get to know her, but first he’ll need to build up the courage to talk to her. 

When Mark asks Riley to work on a special nativity, he finds himself falling for her, particularly because Riley doesn’t seem bothered by his scars. Is her affection for him real or is she simply overcompensating, pretending he’s not different. One thing’s for certain, in a small town that views Mark as a fragile hero, it’s hard to pursue a relationship without everyone in his business. And although Riley has sincere feelings for Mark, is she really ready to risk her heart?

Broken hearts and lives are mended as the town of Miracle Creek comes together to celebrate a Christmas to remember.

Plot:

Riley Madigan never felt a place to call home since her grandmother died when she was thirteen. Her parents moved around a lot, thus, when Riley became an adult she also found it difficult to put roots down in any location. After a broken heart led her to flee from Hollywood where she was working with her dad, Riley needed a place to lie low, and she could have not asked for a better place than Miracle Creek. As new blood for the town, Riley had many heads turning her way including one of the playboy school teacher Dalton. Yet when the presumed town stalker was parked outside her house one night, Riley took up her baseball bat and was ready to swing at ex-firemen Mark Rivers. Mark, who was not a stalker, just has not had a lot of human contact lately and forgot that he could have just called her, wanted Riley’s help in a project. Mark was the town’s hero, after saving six boys from a forest fire, Mark suffered from severe burns to one side of his body, and a broken heart for losing his best friend, Jay, to the flames. Going from the life of the party to hiding from everyone he used to know, Mark found that no one was willing to see the person behind the burn, except Riley. With a recent fire burning down the River’s family outhouse building, that held some of Mark’s late mothers' work, including a nativity set that they set up in town during the holidays. As Riley's painting style is similar to his mother, Mark was willing to exchange Riley’s art for his backbreaking labour to renovate her house. With a thing against Christmas, and the time limit Riley was hesitant to take on Mark’s project. Yet he convinced her, and the two of them set off to build this secret project in a small town that hates secrets. With their friendship blooming, both Riley and Mark have things in their past, with the most dividing part of them would be Riley's disbelief of hope, where for Mark that was what kept him alive. 

Thoughts: 

This book makes you dream of snowy days when you are curled up with hot cocoa cuddling your significant other. Krista Jensen wrote this from the third person point of view as it follows both Riley and Mark around this sleepy town. With flowing easy writing, this book does justice to the holiday feeling and does justice with the title as Miracle Creek is the setting of the story, and Christmas is the main theme. With this being a proper romance between Mark and Riley, the content is clean for all ages, although it would be perfect for those who have a romantic side to them. It is easy to imagine this becoming a made for TV movie, as it has the classic Hallmark film feel. What was not so great was some awkward interactions Jensen put Mark and Riley through, leaving you cringing as each character fought to find the right words and ended up failing. The writing for the awkward stalking/baseball bat confrontation is the worst of it, and it made me want to put the book down and not return. So if you can survive through that plot point, the rest of the story is good. To make this book unique would be both Riley’s and Mark’s past. Riley from her last failure of a relationship, to Mark trying to become himself again in his burnt victim body. Both characters are adequately able to see the physical pain and psychological trauma the others have been through, in which Jensen did not downplay their pain but made it a part of their everyday life. Overall, this midsize novel is perfect for their cozy winter days where you could be dreaming about the holidays or living them, and just want a spark of romance to keep you warm at night. 

Read more reviews: Goodreads

Buy the book: Amazon

[siimjaeyun]

01: Immortality

Synopsis: it is part of human nature to be flawed and imperfect, maybe even vengeful when things don't go their way, and when seven boys find themselves in power to show those who are wrong that actions come with consequences, will they choose to keep their immortality?

masterlist

tw: mentions of blood, stabbing, murder, death and slight choking

-------

"Wait let me get this straight. Your solution to the problem is for us to get killed over and over again instead of reporting them to the police?" Sunoo stood at the edge of the room, completely baffled by the older boy's plan. 

"You don't get it Sunoo. This is part of the plan, it's always been. Why did you think we saved you?" Sunghoon took the glass of water from counter and gulped it down slowly before staring at Jungwon and Riki. 

"Your immortality is precious and it's a form of power. This is your new job." 

"What job? I don't want this job." Jay let a hefty sight escape from his lips before pulling the three minors closer to him. 

"I get you don't want to be immortal. None of us chose to be here. Come." Jay went to the nearest drawer and pulled out a scrapbook. 

"This is before we were eighteen." Jungwon furrowed his brows and didn't see a difference between them. 

"But you look the same?" 

"Immortality keeps you at this age. But we were normal teens too, we had dreams." Heeseung and Jake looked down, remembering the days from their own past as well. 

"Then what happened?" Riki asked. 

"We don't remember much of what happened. Memories fade eventually. It's been fifteen years since we entered this new world." Jake waited for a response but instead handed the three boys their belongings. 

"Go on or you'll be late. We'll keep an eye on you from afar, but just go with your mind got it?" The three youngest didn't have much to stay and reluctantly accepted the very non-existent plan. 

"Are we sure about this? What if this is a prank?" Jungwon and Sunoo stopped in their tracks and looked at Riki. 

"I clearly remember being dead so might as well suck it up. Team?" Jungwon put forward his hand and the others followed shouting a cheer before entering the room. 

"Sorry we're late, we got lost since we're not used to the campus grounds." Three heads instantly popped up at the sound of their voice. Impossible: it was impossible for them to be alive. 

"You said they were dead!" One of them whispered, close to entering into a panic. 

"They were! You saw they had no heartbeat." The other responded. Their legs began to shake left and right as well as up and down due to fear, nibbling on their nails and surrounding skin. 

"No worries, just take a seat." As if a feeling inside his heart was about to over take him, Sunoo felt a need to take a seat next to one of the three boys. He plopped his backpack onto the desk and gave a smile wave to the tall boy. 

This was the first trial.

----- 

"Hey! You three come here." The basketball players waved their hands at them in a snapping manner and if on que, Heeseung smirks when he looks down at the time on his watch. 

"Humans really are predictable aren't they?" Jake agrees and continues to listen into the conversation. 

"We're having a party tonight, you should come." Again, right on time. 

"Uhh, I'm not sure…" Jungwon elbowed Riki in the stomach before accepting the kind invitation. 

"We'll be there!" Sunoo quickly answered before looking at Jungwon with confusion. 

"What are you thinking! This is a trap to clearly kill us!" Riki states in a distressed manner. 

"Something is telling me to do so, plus isn't that the plan?" Jay and Sunghoon were amused at Sunoo and Jungwon's quick adaptation to their life. 

"Seems like they've got this, but remember to get the car anyway." Sunghoon slung his backpack lazily over his shoulder and led the way as they waited for the second trial. 

------- 

The night had fallen and almost as if the stars had aligned, Heeseung glanced at his watch once more as Sunoo, Jungwon and Riki stepped into the home where the so-called party was being held. It took half an hour for the three school boys dressed in jerseys to drag out three black bags, body shaped to be exact. 

"Hurry the fuck up man, before we get caught!" The other two obeyed the orders and carried the bags into the trunk of the car with much speed. A small drive later and an empty lot awaited them. 

"Throw them there." The sound of shovels digging surrounded the nearby area, and with the rhythm of the sand and dirt hitting the floor, the three bodies were finally covered. 

"We take this until our death beds. This better get the job done." The car drove off; it allowed for Heeseung and Jay to approach the bodies underneath the ground. 

"5..4..3..2..1" The supposed to be dead boys came from behind the trees dusting themselves off from the sand. 

"That was even more terrible the second time. Drugging us and then stabbing us isn't exactly fun." 

"You did great. You're almost there." Jake complimented only for anger to resound in Jungwon. 

"Look no offense, but I don't know if we can continue this. I don't want to relive the trauma of being murdered over and over again." He loosened his tie and threw it onto the pavement. 

"I'm with Jungwon. Is this really the only way to get the job done?" 

"Yes, now let's go get some rest. Tomorrow is going to be a very long day." Sunghoon patted their backs and led them back. 

Second trial was complete. 

------- 

"How are you boys holding up? Today's sort of the final trial." Jake walked into their room first thing in the morning, bearing food and other trinkets. 

"To be honest, I cried myself to sleep. I'd rather be dead than be doing this. Why were we saved?" Riki asked with slight hesitancy.

"Heeseung and I asked ourselves that every single day since our murder. We were the new kids and well, these two boys weren't exactly fond of us so their plan was to kill us and they were successful. We woke up to this new life and even though I've never been able to come with a clear answer, you'll find out in time. This is a lot. I get it, but you've got each other. This job isn't fun, but you get used to it. The pain isn't even that bad." He left the room almost immediately and went with the others. 

The same scenario repeated once more. Bewildered eyes met the three boys upon their entrance, and paranoia engulfed the three murderers. Heeseung went ahead and peered into the classroom. Shaky legs, check. Nail biting check. Sweat, check. 

"This can't be happening. This isn't real. What if this is a prank?" Sunoo once more waved at them slightly before leaning in towards them. 

"I had fun at the party last night, maybe we can do it again. Or maybe you'd like to rest since I'm sure digging and dragging must be hard work." With innocent eyes, he smiled slyly and gave a head nod to Jungwon and Riki. 

"What's next? I doubt that they'd be willing to get caught up again." It was lunch time, which gave them time to decide on their next move. 

"You go to them. After all, where else would you find your phone?" Riki began to feel into his pockets but found nothing. 

"Damn it." Satisfied, the four left the three kids on their own. 

The clock struck eight when Jungwon knocked on the familiar wooden door which was opened by the oldest school boy. 

"Y-you guys. Why are you here?" 

"We wanted to party like last night but I left my phone here." Jungwon went straight to the nearest bedroom and found his phone comfortably tucked away under a pillow with a recording. 

"Well what do have here? A memory from last night." Sunoo pressed the small play button and let the audio run though. 

"Hurry the hell up will you!" 

"Did you bring your dad's car like I told you? Get on with it." 

"I'm sad it had to come to this." 

"Get them!" Their hands became tightly wrapped around their necks and before they knew it, they had experienced their third death. 

They went back to the familiar lot, repeating the motions and excavating through the hard ground to create a burrow for the bodies. 

"Dump the brown haired one first." When they managed to pat the dirt neatly and move on to the rest of the bodies, they were gone. 

"Huh? Is this the end of the party? But I wanted to have more fun." Sunoo walked out first and showed a small pout while watching terror and horror overtake the players in their presence. Without a thought, the shovel was swung and he came down, falling unconscious. 

"Boooo, all we wanted was to become friends. Is this really it?" Now Riki emerged from the trees, crossing his arms while glancing at Sunoo's body. 

Another swing over took him, but it was time for the final show. 

"Hi! I'm Jungwon and these are my friends Sunoo and Riki. Please treat us well." Jungwon tried to approach them but they instead fled towards the car, struggling to understand what was occurring. 

"Get away you-you ahh!" Jungwon and Sunoo crept from behind while Riki dangled the car keys in front of them. 

"Have a safe ride! Stay safe!" With the final shouts, Heeseung, Jake, Sunghoon and Jay finally left the shadows. 

Jay let out a maniacal laughter, which caused confusion with the three youngest. 

"Good job boys. Good job." Those were the final words he told them before going home. 

As sleep entered their systems, they began to wonder about their actions and Sunghoon's words from two nights before.

Humans themselves were responsible for the consequences. They were complex creatures, sure, but driven by power and greed can betray the good of anyone. They never created the killer. 

Like a cycle, they went at a similar time to the school in the morning only to cause the three boys to break down in tears.

------- 

taglist: @the-moon-lost-in-joy @twntycm  

[norxhwrites]

Below the cut you will find my roleplay masterlist. It contains three lists of: Wanted Opposites, Wanted Fcs, and Wanted Plots. If any of these fcs or plots interest you either: Message me, heart this, or write a starter and I’ll reply to it!

Below the cut you will find my roleplay masterlist. It contains three lists of: Wanted Opposites, Wanted Fcs, and Wanted Plots. If any of these fcs or plots interest you either: Message me, heart this, or write a starter and I’ll reply to it!

So, I know that face claims aren’t everything, and that looks don’t make a character, but these are some faces I’d like to play opposite of.

Jon Bernthal

Jason Momoa

Charlie Weber

Ben Barnes

DJ Cotrona

Charlie Hunnam

Jessica Sula

Skeet Ulrich

Troian Bellisario

Shay Mitchell

Monica Raymund

Jon Seda

Chloe Bennet

Michael Ealy

Jesse Williams

Shemar Moore

Jesse Lee Soffer

Alicia Vikander

Priyanka Chopra

Crystal Reed

Jeffrey Dean Morgan

Willa Holland

Arden Cho

Ricky Whittle

Dacre Montgomery

Margot Robbie

Theo James

Katheryn Winnick

Faces I’d like to play/test out! (They will become test characters, and if I like them, I’ll add them to my muse page!)

Female

Ana De Armas

Shelley Hennig

Caity Lotz

Monica Raymund

Charlotte Spencer

Alexandra Park

Gabriella Wilde

Shailene Woodley

Naomi Scott

Lindsey Morgan

Leah Pipes

Chyler Leigh

Leighton Meester

Rachelle Lefevre

Torrey Devitto

Tina Desai

Emily Browning

Jamie Clayton

Alicia Vikander

Adria Arjona

Emily Kinney

Diane Guerrero

Hayley Kiyoko

Maisie Richardson Sellers

Sophia Bush

Meaghan Rath

Gina Rodriguez

Vanessa Morgan

Ginny Gardner

Emilia Clarke

Jessica Chastain

Brianna Hildebrand

Danielle Campbell

Male;

Taylor Kinney

Jai Courtney

Hayden Christensen

Jack Falahee

Henry Cavill

Aaron Taylor Johnson

Tom Hiddleston

amadeus serafini

Mike Vogel

Taron Egerton

Shiloh Fernandez

Charles Melton

Ewan Mcgregor

Ben Barnes

Richard Madden

Tom Maden

Max Riemelt

Jesse Williams

Charlie Weber

Boyd Holbrook

Nick Gehlfuss

William Moseley

Aaron Tveit

Manish Dayal

Now, these are some storylines I’ve written and would love to try out! (though some of them I’ve lost muse for!) Some of these are based off of tv shows, movies, books, etc.

Behaving Badly -

[ Muse A ] never stood a chance. Even though they grew up in a decent household, they were always drawn to things they shouldn’t have been, and people who they should have stayed away from. Bad choice after bad choice led [ Muse A ] into a spiral of uncontrollable destruction. They seemed to destroy everything they touched, including their relationship with their family, their ability to have a career, or find love. Until [ Muse B ] came into the picture. Attracted to danger as much as [ Muse A ], [ Muse B ] was equally as screwed up, and just as good at being bad. After months, or even years on the road, stealing and cheating their way through the country, [ Muse A ] realizes that perhaps [ Muse B ] was better at being bad then they were, so much in that they they’ve begin to wonder exactly what they’ve gotten themselves into. [ Muse A ] misses their family, and wonders if they’re able to go back and start over. [ Muse B ]’s only family is their partner in crime, and they’ll do anything to make sure they stay together. Can this modern day Bonnie and Clyde (Clyde and Clyde/Bonnie and Bonnie) give up their wicked ways? or will they continue their bad behavior?

 Come Back Home -

[ Muse A ] is married to a member of the Military. They’re a loyal spouse who’s done everything they can to support [ Muse B ], though things have changed. They aren’t the love struck teenagers they were when they got married right out of high school. They’re different, [ Muse A ] is lonely, and [ Muse B ] finds it difficult to talk about the things they’ve seen and done. They’ve done everything they can to make things work and things don’t look like they’re every going to change. But when [ Muse B ] is medically discharged from the their Unit, [ Muse A ] looks at it like a second chance for them to get things right. [ Muse B ] is still haunted by their past, and [ Muse A ] is still unsure of how to help, but maybe their lives can get better?

 Wrong Side of the Tracks -

In a town were deep prejudice divides their residents, [ Muse A ] is the perfect child of the towns Sheriff/Mayor etc. They’ve always been the type to make their parents proud and do exactly what they’re told. [ Muse B ] is bad news, or at least everyone says so. Accused of a horrific crimes and basically driven out of town, [ Muse B ] has returned after a few years, and the rumor mill begins again. When [ Muse B ] meets [ Muse A ], they click instantly. [ Muse A ] is curious, and wants to know if the rumors are true, and [ Muse B ] sees [ Muse A ] as a pure light among all of the terrible people that live in their town. But when a student from the nearby college goes missing, all fingers point to [ Muse B ]. [ Muse A ] knows that [ Muse B ] couldn’t have done anything wrong, and wants to prove their innocence. [ Muse B ] refuses to allow [ Muse A ] to get involved, and begins to push them away. [ Muse A ] begins to do their best to find out what really happened, but instead finds a web of lies that tie into the towns Authorities, and a cover up of the crime [ Muse B ] was accused of years ago.

 The End -

[ Muse A ] has given them a chance. Over and over again they’ve tried to see past all of the lying and cheating, but [ Muse B ] just doesn’t seem to want to change. They don’t seem to see the wrong in their actions, and no matter how hard [ Muse A ] tries to work things out, there’s only so much a single person can do. So this is it, the end. [ Muse A ] is ready to walk out the door and never look back. Unfortunately, [ Muse B ] finally believes it, and can’t bare the thought. So, [ Muse A ] has given one more chance. One. [ Muse B ] must prove to them that they’ve changed and that everything is going to be better, or [ Muse A ] is gone.

 California Dreaming -

[ Muse A ] is living the California Dream. Surfing all afternoon, partying all night, sleeping all morning and repeat, nothing can make this dream any better. Until they meet [ Muse B ]. [ Muse B ] fits perfectly into [ Muse A ]’s laid back, carefree lifestyle and the two fall for each other very quickly. As the two get to know each other, [ Muse A ] realizes they don’t know  [ Muse B ] as much as they thought. [ Muse B ] is involved in some very shady, very illegal things, that don’t exactly fit into [ Muse A ]’s lifestyle. Dragged into a world of drugs, violence, and sex, [ Muse A ]’s life is turned upside down when they get caught up in an investigation into [ Muse B ] and the people they work with. They California Dream turns into a nightmare, and the only way out is to leave that world behind, but can they without getting dragged back in by their feelings for [ Muse B ]?

 Defiance | 1940s Setting |-

[Muse A] is a Jewish person living in early 1940s Belarus. German Nazis have ordered the execution of all Jewish people living in the ghettos. [Muse A] witnesses the murder of their family before they flee to the Naliboki Forest, a large rural landscape covering a large portion of Belarus. That is where [Muse A] meets [Muse B], another Jewish escapee fleeing from the Nazi soldiers. The two set up camp along with multiple other Jewish men, women and children fleeing Nazi controlled areas. They begin stealing from local farms, hunting, and moving their camp in order to stay alive. As winter approaches, the group must learn to survive sickness, starvation, and perhaps even betrayal as the Nazi soldiers begin to close in on the camp’s location. Getting caught is not an option, it means death for the entire group.

 A Summer Affair  -

[ Muse A ] and [ Muse B ] are from two different worlds, yet they found themselves vacationing at the same place for a couple of weeks during the summer. After weeks of hot, passionate romance the two say goodbye in order to get back to their normal, boring lives and normal, boring jobs. [ Muse A ] is a recent college graduate who’s in need of a job. [ Muse B ] is the CEO of a huge company and is in need of an assistant. Not knowing [ Muse B ] runs the company, [ Muse A ] applies for the job. [ Muse B ] is now [ Muse A ]’s boss, not to mention they have a life that [ Muse A ] wasn’t told about during their summer fling. Now, [ Muse A ] must do all they can to keep the job they desperately need, while juggling feelings for their boss, keeping the secret of their summer affair from their coworkers, and deciding if they want to rekindle the spark between them and [Muse B].

You Mind as Well Go to Hell -

If you don’t go to church, then you mind as well go to hell. That is the policy in the [ Muse A’s ] House. Of course, you tell a teenager one thing and they do the opposite. [ Muse A ] is the Pastor’s pride and joy, of course they wouldn’t be if they knew the kind of stuff their child did in their free time. Finally [ Muse A ] decide to get out. They climb into a van and head west to California. Except it isn’t at all what they expected. Getting to Cali was hard enough, but making it in Cali could break this sweet kid from the south. Did they just enter the world of their dreams, or did they go from singing in the church choir, to the Hell they were taught to be terrified of? Then comes [ Muse B ]. Street smart, headstrong, wise beyond their years, [ Muse B ] knows their way around California’s underground. With [ Muse B ] as their guide, [ Muse A ] begins to navigate through the streets of California, hoping to find the life they dreamed of back home in Alabama.

Something’s gotta Give -

Growing up, they only had themselves. Living in a world fueled by violence, family doesn’t always mean safety. For the [ Muse A ], family wasn’t something they believed in, being foster children half their lives, and the child of terrible parents the other half. They believed in evil people, hard times, and the fact that someone’s always got an angle when it comes to lending a helping hand. No one is inherently good. Finally, [ Muse A] has turned 18, making them free from the foster care system. Criminal record half a mile long, [ Muse A ] must find a way to make it in the big world. Enters [ Muse B ]. Successful, hardworking, seemingly perfect. [ Muse A ] and [ Muse B ] meet by chance, this chance encounter turns into more as the two begin to see each other. What happens when [ muse B ] finds out about [ Muse A’s ] past? Will it ruin the best thing that has happened to [ Muse A ] in a long time? Or will they finally be able to move past the dark things that have followed them their entire life?

Wicked Attraction | 1920-1940s Setting | -

[Muse A] was always considered to be perfect. They graduated at the top of their class, have a great job, but they’ve always felt like something was missing. [Muse B] was always the same way, though beneath the prefect was a secret. A wicked secret. [Muse B] is part of an underground world of drugs and violence. What happens when [Muse A] and [Muse B] meet and [Muse B]introduces [Muse A] to an underground world of sex, drugs, and violence? Is this what [Muse A]’s always been missing? Can they escape this Wicked Attraction?

Welcome Home -

[Muse A] seemed like the perfect child, good grades, good family, good friends. Everything about except when it came to their feelings for [Muse B]. [Muse B] was too old and too damaged to be involved with someone like [Muse A], but it didn’t stop them from falling for each other. [Muse A] left their infectious little town, leaving all of the bad (including Muse B), behind them. Years later, they return, only to find that [Muse B] never got out. Will their old flame rekindle? Or will [Muse A] realize that[Muse B] is all wrong for them?

On The Road Again -

[ Muse A ] has always been a drifter, never staying in one place, feeling as though the only place they belonged was on the road. [ Muse B ] has always been the conservative type, the type to go to school, get a boring job. One day, [ Muse A ] was passing through the town that [ Muse B ] lived in. They meet, and [ Muse A ] begins to think they may have found a place where they might actually be able to call home. The two begin a relationship based on all the lies [ Muse A ] had to tell in order to keep their past a secret. But [ Muse A ]’s past begins to catch up with them, will they be able to face it, or will they have to run away again?

How You Remind Me -

[ Muse A ] and [ Muse B ] had been dating off and on for years. Breakups, make ups, harsh words, drug/alcohol fueled nights, and flying fists. Unhealthy is the only way to describe their relationship. Loving each other was the easiest and hardest thing they had ever done. Finally unable to take it anymore, [ Muse A ] left in the middle of the night without saying goodbye. With their lover gone, [ Muse B ] fell into an even deeper hole of drugs and violence. Years later, [ Muse A ] has cleaned up their life, gotten a good job, and made a difference in the lives of others. [ Muse B ] is still stuck in a life of one night stands, but they’ve gotten themselves clean from drugs and alcohol. The two meet unexpectedly, and see how different each other have become. This chance encounter turns into another, than another, but [ Muse A ] is unsure of whether or not they want to get themselves caught back up in that world. For [ Muse B ], seeing [ Muse A ] reminds them of all the terrible things they had done in their past. Being reminded of all they had done, [ Muse B ] decides to they need to show [ Muse A ] they’ve changed for good.  

Teacher, Teacher. -

[Muse A] is a college Professor. All of their students love them, both because they’re physically attractive and a very good professor , who has little trouble with connecting with students. [Muse B] is a student college that [Muse A] a teaches at. They’ve always been an average/above average student, but for some personal reason, they’ve been having a lot of trouble in the class that [Muse A] teaches. So, in a last effort to get their grade up before the end of the term, [Muse B] has been staying after class to get extra help. The only problem is, they’ve slowly found themselves having feelings for each other beyond the normal professor/student relationship.

Almost Stepparent -

For as long as [Muse A] could remember, it had been only them and their single parent. Their parent had dated and brought home every type of person imaginable, but this one was different. This one was [Muse B]. [Muse B] is everything [Muse A] is looking for in a partner, not to mention at least a decade younger than their parent. What happens when [Muse A] finally realizes they have feelings for [Muse B], their parent’s partner. [Muse B] has feelings for [Muse A], feelings well beyond what is appropriate to feel towards the child of your partner. What happens when the two are left alone for a week while [Muse A’s] parent is out taking care of a sick family member?

Now these are plots that I DIDN’T write but would still like to try! (All gender roles are changeable!)

i want a plot where a guy goes on a roadtrip just wandering around the state trying to find meaning of life with his big ass doggo and one day he comes to diner where this shy young woman works and like her boss is always yelling at her and she has abusive boyfriend and her father used to be abusive as well and this guy he is the first man who ever treated her nicely and he just asks her completely out of the blue if she doesn’t want to leave with him and she’s like “why not?” so she takes all of her things and leaves with him. Pleaseee!

i really, really want a plot where muse a is a naive, sweet, romantic, whimsical little thing with a whole lot of optimism and sunshine in their veins and muse b is the complete opposite; a total player who has someone new in their bed every weekend and hates responsibilities and just spends a lot of their time fucking around. somehow these two have been friends for a while, despite their differing personalities, and one day muse a ends up having to move out of their apartment due to a fire or an infestation or something and muse b is the one who offers to put them up for the time being. it’s all well and good except muse a has terrible nightmares constantly and one night muse b is sick and tired of it (and deep down a little concerned) so gets into bed with muse a until they stop crying and shaking and fall asleep in muse b’s arms instead. cue awkward muses sleeping in the same bed every night and it actually helping muse a a lot with the nightmares, and lots of cuddling and feelings ensue. muse b, being the player they are, are terrified of the idea of liking someone but muse a is pretty much already head over heels and ANGST !!

ok but someone give me that cute bartender storyline though? like this guy tends bar at a restaurant or a pub or something and always sees this cute girl hanging out there, but she’s always either with friends or with some guy so he never really gets the time to talk to her BUT ONE DAY she walks into the place alone and orders so many drinks until she’s so bloody drunk, screaming about how her boyfriend cheated on her, that the bartender had to bring her home himself. she wakes up with a horrible hangover, stumbles out the room to find the bartender cooking breakfast and rolling his eyes, laughing. “first of all, you’re an idiot. second, we didn’t have sex if that’s what you’re wondering. third, breakfast will be ready soon. sit.” and fluff commences HELP PLZ

muse a is a new single father, a teenager at that living in an apartment complex with his newborn. it’s one of those apartment complexes in new york city, where everyone kind of keeps to themselves. muse b lives on his floor and has heard this newborn baby crying at ungodly hours, distracting her from her cramming for midterms. she had complained to the landlord about it and one night, she hears the baby crying again. stepping outside in a fit of rage, muse b is about to yell at whoever is the parent to this bastard child until she spots muse a, pacing the hallway with the child in his arms, his hair disheveled and his eyes giving away the sleep he’s been lacking. she feels sympathy instantly; she had no idea muse a lived on her floor, much less was he the father of this child. so, at 3 in the morning, muse b offers to help muse a get the baby back to sleep. and muse b becomes some sort of baby whisperer to muse a, and he continues to go to her for help and they start to dig each other and this is just so cute please

someone give me a plot where muse a was arrested in high school due to drug dealing and was sentenced to ten years — except he’s let out a couple of years early due to good behavior. with no car, his feet take him to the one place he never thought he’d set foot again in a lifetime. his ex-high school sweetheart, muse b. except, when the door opens, it’s not her. it’s a seven year old little girl with her mom’s hair and her dad’s eyes.

a plot where muse a just needs to get away from everything so she packs up everything into her small shitty car that barley runs and just drives. she loses count of the boarders she crossed until she lands right into the middle of a small town where the population is like 2 thousand and her car breaks down. so she goes into a diner that she sees is open and she asks about a mechanic so the lady in the diner calls up her friend who happens to be muse b, the local mechanic. so muse bcomes over and tells her that he wont be able to check her car out until morning bc its like 10 pm now so muse a is going to check into a motel or smth but muse b offers to put her up for the night and bc shes broke she says yeah and basically they end up banging with the intention that after tomorrow they are never gonna see each other again - wrong. muse b goes down to his shop and looks at the engine and a really important parts gone in it and its going to take a couple weeks for it to come in and basically muse a has to stay in this shitty small town for the next couple of weeks AND THEY FALL FOR EACH OTHER AND WE CAN FIGURE THE REST OUT!

ok but a plot based on (not) the one by bebe rexha though. like muse a is a serial lover and has a different lover each week but then muse b happens. andthey end up in the same bed more often than usual. but muse a knows it’s not a good idea because they fear they’ll end up moving on and breaking muse b’s heart, which is when they realize they care for them. so even if they want to stop it there, they can’t because they are themself, unconsciously, falling for muse b.

[newssplashy]

Jonathan Gold, the restaurant critic whose curious, far-ranging, relentless explorations of his native Los Angeles helped his readers understand dozens of cuisines and helped the city understand itself.

The cause was pancreatic cancer, said Margy Rochlin, a close friend.

In more than a thousand reviews published since the 1980s, Gold chronicled his city’s pupuserias, bistros, diners, nomadic taco trucks, soot-caked outdoor rib and brisket smokers, sweaty indoor xiao long bao steamers, postmodern pizzerias, vintage delicatessens, strictly omakase sushi-yas, Roman gelaterias, Korean porridge parlors, Lanzhou hand-pullled noodle vendors, Iranian tongue-sandwich shops, vegan hot dog griddles, cloistered French-leaning hyper-seasonal tasting counters and wood-paneled Hollywood grills with chicken potpie and martinis on every other table.

Unlike some critics, Gold never saw expensive, rarefied restaurants as the peak of the terrain he surveyed, although he reviewed his share of them. Shiki Beverly Hills, Noma and Alinea all took turns under his critical loupe. He was in his element, though, when he championed small, family-run establishments where publicists and wine lists were unheard-of and English was often a second language, if it was spoken at all.

“Before Tony Bourdain, before reality TV and ‘Parts Unknown’ and people really being into ethnic food in a serious way, it was Jonathan who got it, completely,” writer and editor Ruth Reichl said. “He really got that food was a gateway into the people, and that food could really define a community. He was really writing about the people more than the food.”

Gold wrote about restaurants for Gourmet, California and Los Angeles magazines, but the bulk of his reviews appeared in two newspapers: LA Weekly, where in 2007 he won the Pulitzer Prize for criticism, and the Los Angeles Times, where he had been the chief critic since 2012, treating the restaurants of famous and obscure chefs as if he saw no distinction between them. Each publication hired him twice, with long breaks between tours of duty.

He became the subject of a documentary called “City of Gold,” a role model imitated painstakingly and largely in vain by a generation of food writers, a living street atlas of Southern California, the inspiration for a rap tribute in which his list of “99 Essential LA Restaurants” was declaimed over the beat of Jay-Z’s “99 Problems,” and a verb. When actor Mindy Kaling asked Twitter for a pizza recommendation, she added: “Don’t Jonathan Gold me and tell me to go to the San Gabriel Valley.”

He may not have eaten everything in Los Angeles, but nobody came closer. He rarely went to the subject of one of his reviews without stopping to try four or five other places along the way. He once estimated that in the hunt for interesting new things to eat and write about, he put 20,000 miles on his green Dodge Ram 1500 pickup truck each year. While driving, he liked listening to opera.

If a new group of immigrants turned up in Los Angeles County, chances were good he had already studied the benchmark dishes of their cuisine in one or more of the 3,000 to 5,000 cookbooks he owned. If a restaurant opened, he probably knew the names and specialties of the last five restaurants at that address. In a 2006 review of a Beverly Hills steakhouse, he recalled going to the same location to eat patty melts with his mother and to drink warm beer that a sympathetic waitress poured into teacups after hours when he was a young punk rocker, all in the first paragraph.

“LA always seemed better when he wrote about it,” film critic John Powers, a friend of Gold’s, said. “You just thought, There’s so much stuff here.”

He made a subspecialty of one street in particular. Reichl, who hired him at the Times and Gourmet, recalls his telling her in the 1980s that he had eaten every taco on Pico Boulevard. It was not just tacos. Eventually he wrote about his fascination with the street in a 1998 article that began, “For a while in my early 20s, I had only one clearly articulated ambition: to eat at least once at every restaurant on Pico Boulevard, starting with the fried yucca dish served at a pupuseria near the downtown end and working methodically westward toward the chili fries at Tom’s No. 5 near the beach. It seemed a reasonable enough alternative to graduate school.”

In 2016, Ecco Press bought his proposal for a memoir, which Gold called “a culinary coming of age book, I guess.” It was to be called “Breakfast on Pico.”

Jonathan Gold was born July 28, 1960, in South Los Angeles, where he was raised. His mother, Judith, was a school librarian who had been a magician’s assistant. Irwin Gold, his father, was a probation officer assigned to supervise Roman Polanski and Charles Manson, among other offenders. Jonathan later recalled eating Rice-A-Roni every Tuesday night and spending much of his childhood in his room, playing the cello. When he was old enough to fall under the influence of new wave, he plugged in his instrument and sawed away at it in the short-lived local band Overman.

With cello proficiency in his favor, he attended the University of California, Los Angeles. Although he got his degree in music history, in 1982, he had a sideline in art; he took a class with and worked as an assistant for guerrilla performance artist Chris Burden. For a brief time, Gold thought of himself as a performance artist, too. “A naked performance artist, to be specific,” he told an interviewer. His materials for one piece were two bottles of Glade air freshener, a pile of supermarket broiler chickens, a live chicken at the end of a rope and a machete wielded by Gold, who wore only a blindfold. The chicken survived and may have come out of the ordeal in better spirits than Gold, who later said, “The few minutes after an art performance are some of the most depressing in the world.”

While he was in college, Gold walked into the office of LA Weekly, an alternative paper, where he was soon reading proofs and pitching big, doomed ideas about the zeitgeist. For a time in the 1980s, he was the newspaper’s music editor, and by the 1990s he was better known as a music journalist than a food writer, contributing long articles to Spin, Details and other magazines. While reporting a Rolling Stone article about the emergence of gangsta rap, Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg gave him a nickname: Nervous Cuz.

The music scene changes at a pace that can wear out a middle-aged writer, but food writers tend to improve as they get more meals under their belt. In 1986, Gold had started a column for LA Weekly about the kinds of places where he liked to eat. It was called Counter Intelligence. Week by week, year by year, he built a reputation for finding restaurants that were virtually unknown outside the neighborhoods of immigrants who were often the only customers until he walked in.

In his peregrinations, he came to appreciate how Los Angeles’s far-flung neighborhoods allowed small, distinct cultures to flourish without bumping into each other.

“In New York, because it is so condensed, you’re very aware of who’s around,” he once said, “whereas in Los Angeles, if you open a Korean restaurant, there’s a good chance you’ll only serve to Koreans. That sort of isolation is not necessarily good for politics or civil life, but it is really good for food.”

Far from a stunt eater, he nevertheless understood that a writer trying to persuade unseen strangers to read about a restaurant one or two counties away cannot afford to dismiss the persuasive power of chopped goats’ brains, pigs’ blood soup or an octopus leg separated from the rest of a living octopus so recently that it twirls itself around the nearest pair of chopsticks.

These delicacies and others were described in language that was anachronistic in its rolling, deliberate gait but exquisitely contemporary in its allusions. He could pack infinitesimal shadings of nuance into a rhetorical question.

The hallmark of his style, though, was the second-person voice. He used it prodigiously. Taken literally, he seemed to be saying that you, personally, had visited a great number of restaurants and consumed a wide variety of animal parts that, taken together, nobody but Gold had ever visited and consumed.

In “City of Gold,” Sue Horton, an editor at Reuters, says of his use of the second person, “He’s forming a bond with the reader: You and I are people who eat deer penis.”

His prose was apparently as agonizing to produce as it was pleasurable to read. For a time he saw a therapist for writer’s block until it was mutually agreed that somebody as prolific as Gold could not be described as blocked. Editors were driven to despair by his habit of taking deadlines seriously only once they were safely in the past. Powers, who edited him at LA Weekly, called him “the Usain Bolt of being slow.”

Like many restaurant critics, he tried to keep his image out of circulation for years. Anybody who had seen him was unlikely to forget him, though. He was more than 6 feet tall, with wispy ripples of shoulder-length strawberry blond hair that in recent years had tended to avoid the top of his scalp. His chin was capacious. When he turned up at a Peruvian stall in a food court a few years ago, the chef, Ricardo Zarate, wondered why so many pictures were being take by a man who “looked like George Washington.” He figured it out a few weeks later when Gold’s review was published.

Informally, the incognito phase ended when a photograph of Gold celebrating his Pulitzer win in a pink, Champagne-basted shirt got around. Officially, it was finished when he allowed LA Weekly to publish his photograph shortly before the release of “City of Gold” in 2015.

Between his amiability and his longevity on the job, he accumulated friends in the restaurant business. Some of his disclosures could make interesting reading. When he reviewed David Chang’s new restaurant in Los Angeles, Majordomo, his thoughts on the cooking took up only slightly more space than his partial history of his dealings with Chang.

In his first term at LA Weekly he met Laurie Ochoa, an intern and now an editor, whom he married in 1990. They went to restaurants together and contrived to work together, moving in tandem from one publication to another: the Los Angeles Times, Gourmet, LA Weekly again, the Times again.

She survives him, along with their children, Isabel and Leon, and Gold’s brother, Mark, the associate director of the Institute of the Environment and Sustainability at UCLA.

Many claims have been made for Gold’s criticism, but he saw his work in modest terms. He wanted to make Los Angeles smaller.

“I’m not a cultural anthropologist,” he once said. “I write about taco stands and fancy French restaurants to try to get people less afraid of their neighbors and to live in their entire city instead of sticking to their one part of town.”

This article originally appeared in The New York Times.

PETE WELLS © 2018 The New York Times

via NigeriaNews | Latest Nigerian News,Ghana News,News,Entertainment,World News,sports,Naij In a Splash

[cursedcandyroses]

CURSED CANDY ROSES PRESENTS: THE 50 BEST PROJECTS OF 2017

The most jam packed year of the decade has came and went with a crater of emotion left behind. The ever expanding Pandora’s Box that the internet has become has only seemed to scratch the surface of iit’s potential in the field of music. Every year the music world becomes smaller and smaller while albums become more grandiose. Streaming has lead to numbers being juiced extravagantly, allowing acts to sell minimal physical copies but still go Gold & Platinum. The Streaming Boom has also lead to acts we may have never heard of 20 years ago exploding into the limelight, and acts of yesterday having their 15 minutes expanded. In all honesty I could have made a list of 100 albums and it still wouldn’t have felt like enough. But 50 (plus some) will have to do. 

BEFORE WE GET STARTED: THE NEXT 9 

N*E*R*D - No One Ever Really Dies

Giraffage - Too Real

Moses Sumney - Aromanticism

Rex Orange County - Apricot Princess

Lil Peep - Come Over When You’re Sober

Bill Woods & Blockhead - Known Unknowns

RJ - Mr. LA

Joji - In Tongues

Amine - Good For You

Now to the real list

50: Overdoz. - 2008

Genre: Hip-Hop 

4 years since their last release, Overdoz sounds like they never took a day off. Party jams mixed in with two step love anthems and sprinkles of consciousness are the ingredients to one of the most energetic and top to bottom enjoyable west coast albums in recent memory. These elements mixed with a murders row of top tier producers (Hit-Boy, THC, Pharrell, Organized Noize) meld together for a kaleidoscope of sound and texture, the perfect kind to start and end a night out with.

Best Tracks: “Last Kiss” & “House Party″

49: Syd Tha Kyd - Fin

Genre: R&B / Pop

The family tree that the Odd Future collective has spawned is like none other in music. Within the collective sat The Internet, a duo that has expanded into a full 5 man band, and within that crew is lead singer Syd. On her first solo effort, the songstress dips her toes into the sound of today’s sound with R&B and Rap infused production, with hook as infectious as the best Pop songs on the other side of the dial. Branching out from the jazz and neo-soul stylings of The Internet has given music fans a new artist to reinvent and evolve the mainstream sound of the day. 

Best Tracks: “Know” & “Nothin’ To Somethin’”

Sounds Like: Kehlani’s “You Should Be Here″

48: A$AP Mob - Cozy Tapes Vol. 2: Too Cozy

Genre: Hip-Hop

When the winter brings snow to your ankles and winds that’ll chap your lips, you know it’s time to layer up and get cozy. A$AP Mob has been the go-to New York rap crew over the past few years, but with this newest compilation they take a turn. With heavy contributions from their newest adoptee Playboi Carti, the Mob turns to sonic's that lean more Soundcloud then sample heavy. Tunes with Big Sean, Key!, Chief Keef and Quavo are balanced out by posse jams with Flatbush Zombies and Pro Era members, bringing everyone into a new space that the Mob keeps curating and molding as they go along. 

Best Tracks: “What Happens” & “Walk On Water”

47: Your Old Droog - Packs

Genre: East Coast Hip-Hop

The balance of keeping the grit and feeling of classic New York hip-hop and wanting to mix in a modern day playfulness and enginuity is type of duality New Yorkers have been reaching for since 50 Cent. Unlike 50, Droog has no want to be a mainstream star, but instead focuses on being the best at what he does. Storytelling, obscure references and punchlines that’ll bring chest pains (from either laughter or how hard they hit) are the specialties of one of hip-hops most talented underground stars.

Best Tracks: “Grandma Hips” & “White Rappers (A Good Guest)”

46: Ty Dolla $ign - Beach House 3

Genre: R&B / Hip-Hop

Every artist strives to find their sound exceed within it. For an artist like Ty Dolla $ign he is with every project experimenting and proving that he is one of the most talented and skilled artist in hip-hop. Though Ty has always been criticized for repetitive content of parties and drug use, like each “Beach House” instalment before this junior effort, Ty expands and dabbles into many forms of contemporary urban music. A sonic experience like no other crossover artist has been able to do, Ty again flexes a perfect duality of being a singles driven artist while still holding true artistic integrity. 

Best Tracks: “Don’t Judge Me” & “Message In A Bottle”

45: Dizzee Rascal - Raskit

Genre: Grime

With razor sharp precision, the veteran UK rapper has brought with him the best Grime record of the year. Over the past few years artists like Skepta and Stormzy have come from across the pond into our lives, but these artists would be nowhere without one of the godfathers of the genre. Nearly 15 years after his world-renowned “Boy In Da Corner” record, Dizzee improves upon that sound infusing modern production styles and a more palatable rapping style to restate his claim as the greatest Grime artist walking the earth

Best Tracks: “Ghost” & “Dummy (16 For The Juice)”

44: Freddie Gibbs - You Only Live 2wice

Genre: Hip-Hop

After being freed from an European prison on false rape charges Indiana’s finest gave the people signs of life. Saying that this project is just a little something to hold fans over until the release of his next Madlib collab, Gibbs held nothing back. Speaking on everything from the incarceration, street tales and the fears that come with fame and fatherhood. Everything from introspective, to car knocking anthems, Freddie reminds us that he is one of hip-hops ever morphing figures, unleashing his art over any beat he can get his hands on.

Best Tracks: “20 Karat Jesus” & “Crushed Glass”

43: Belly & Boi-1da - Mumble Rap

Genre: Hip-Hop

Boi-1da has been behind some of the biggest and best records of the past decade from Drake and Kendrick, to Lana Del Rey and Rihanna, and he has for the first time taken over the boards for a full album. This newest project Belly has put forth in his short career as a lead act, and not just a songwriter, shows the XO signee never taking a line off and making a statement that he is here to stay as a solo artist.

Best Tracks: “Lullaby” & “The Come Down Is Real”

42: Sonder - Into

Genre: R&B

Brent Faiyaz, the crooner responsible for vocals on Goldlink’s chart topping hit “Crew”, began his year off with an EP that catches the soul of the nighttime that ensues after the party's over. From the layered and airy production to his remorseful and woeful lyrics that cover the length of the project, Brent and the rest of Sonder create a realm of shadowy emotion that words can never properly describe, but a feeling all to real to everyone.

Best Track: “Lovely”

Sounds Like: JMSN’s “JMSN”

41: JMSN - Whatever Makes U Happy

Genre: Jazz / Soul

JMSN has steadily created one of the best discographies in music today, and that is due to his willingness to experiment and branch into different genres. With a vocal range and tone like no one working today, JMSN can try different production styles and never feel out of place. His latest offer catches the soul of jazz and R&B by mostly being recorded in one take, with an empty room, outside of him and an assortment of talented musicians. His woeful longings and poems dealing with the many levels of relationships is a further step in the direction of the type of artistry that JMSN aims to be a part of.

Best Tracks: “Drinkin’” & “Slowly”

Sounds Like: D’angelo’s “Voodoo”

40: Talib Kweli - Radio Silence

Genre: Hip-Hop

Talib Kweli has never missed a step lyrically. No one has been as consistent since the turn of the century as the Brooklyn native, and now 17 years into his solo career Kweli adds another gem to his discography. Speaking on the struggles of the African-American community in America has always been a strong suit of Kweli, but he has done it this time around with inclusion of artists that are far from his comfort zone with rappers like Rick Ross and Waka Flocka Flame. Whether accompanying their styles or his own, Talib always finds a way to shine and bring a crucial message to lovers of hip-hop.

Best Tracks: “All Of Us” & “She’s My Hero”

39: Migos - Culture

Genre: Hip-Hop

Time and time again the world has counted out the Migos. When the entered the consciousness with “Versace” they were a one-hit wonder. When they continued they were “just rapping fast about nothing”. Now, nearly 5 years later they are the biggest group in all of hip-hop, and most popular hip-hop group in over a decade. This newest project is a dive into the sound they helped create with production from artists like Metro Boomin and Zaytoven who helped create this modern trap sound. Quavo’s club ready hooks, Offset’s energy and aggression, and Takeoff’s killer verses all fall like puzzle pieces right into the ethereal and world renowned sound of modern day rap music. 

Best Tracks: “T-Shirt” & “Get Right Witcha”

38: Jay Worthy & The Alchemist - Fantasy Island

Genre: Hip-Hop

Jay Worthy is a name everyone should get more familiar with. Adopting the West Coast as a transient from Canada, Worthy has been apart of underground rap circles for years, and has reeled in colleagues such as Conway and $ha Hef for his latest endeavour. One of many group projects Worthy has been a piece of this year, none fit his blunted and laid back rapping style as well as this fully-Alchemist produced EP.

Best Track: “Miss You”

Sounds Like: Domo Genesis & The Alchemist’s “No Idols”

37: Mac DeMarco - This Old Dog

Genre: Indie Rock / Lo-Fi

Mac Demarco’s yacht rock, even folk-esk at times, guitar strummings and singing push the vision of a scenic view from a boat in the middle of a lake to your mind. The breeze in your face, the smell of cold beer and new winter coats. For years Mac has created the aesthetic of the lovable slacker, but on his newest record something has changed. Instead of performing from the boat for the crowd to watch, these sounds feel closer and more intimate, becoming less of someone to marvel from afar, and more of someone you feel like a friend of.

Best Tracks: “Sister” & “On The Level”

36: J.I.D. - The Never Story

Genre: Hip-Hop

From the Atlanta collective known as Spillage Village to an artist under J. Cole’s Dreamville label, JID has been a part of some wonderful company. Being around great MC’s along with an energy and skill set that separate him from the bunch of traditional Atlanta artists, JID has pushed his name into the front of the pack of the new artists who ruled in 2017. Bars for days and an ear for production that’s as outlandish as he is makes for a perfect storm of an artist who still isn’t in his final form, but is a scary sight as is.

Best Tracks: “General” & “Hereditary”

Sounds Like: Vince Staples’ “Shyne Coldchain Vol. 2″

35: Majid Jordan - The Space Between

Genre: R&B / Synthpop

The Canadian duo has taken everything they have ever done and tinkered it and improved it into what is the perfect mission statement for the OVO Label outside of Drake. Everything from sleek late night two step anthems, to 80′s revival jams that beg to be screamed in your car. The duo brings in labelmates dvsn and PARTYNEXTDOOR, with the later playing a part in one of the most underrated grooves of the past year. Majid Jordan finds ways to improve and level up in ways no other R&B duo has done in years.

Best Tracks: “One I Want” & “Gave Your Love Away”

34: CyHi The Prynce - No Dope On Sundays

Genre: Hip-Hop

CyHi is one of the many artists who as a fan feared would be trapped by label politics into releasing astounding mixtapes and never putting together a true debut album. With “No Dope On Sundays” CyHi breaks through the paperwork and his drug dealing past into being able to look back on these times and give gems that everyone can appreciate. From black empowerment, advice to hustlers the world over, and becoming comfortable and accepting of religion in his life the G.O.O.D. Music signee puts together the sum of his mixtapes into a cohesive body of work that can be studied like scripture.

Best Tracks: “Nu Africa” & “Get Yo Money”

33: PeeWee Longway - The Blue M&M 3

Genre: Hip-Hop

Atlanta’s hip-hop scene has been around for over 2 decades, and has been at the forefront of the rap world for over half that time. The mainstream acts like Migos and Future are intertwined within the small city with lesser known acts like PeeWee Longway due to Atlanta truly being the biggest small town in the south. PeeWee has been apart of the rap scene for years rising alongside the Patron Saint of Georgia himself Gucci Mane. Years of sharpening his lightning fast flow and street themed lyrics have come to fruition on what is arguably the best project in his deep discography.

Best Tracks: “Creep” & “Rerocc”

32: Lorde - Melodrama

Genre: Pop

Pop music over time has become more and more formulaic. Sing like A, about B, over a beat a C BPM and a hit is born. Pop music hasn’t always been this disposable form of music, and at it’s root it’s about catchy songwriting that plays off as simple, but is secretly layered. This is the type of pop music Lorde has created yet again on her newest LP. She doesn't sing about anything out of the norm (love, parties, loneliness, etc) but it’s the way she sings about it. Her songwriting is as good as anyone in modern music, and far outpaces her pop counterparts.

Best Tracks: “Green Light” & “Supercut”

31: Brother Ali - All The Beauty In This Whole Life

Genre: Hip-Hop

Brother Ali has made a career on crafting stories straight from a diary, and would just as quickly tell you rap about the evils the world holds. For this project Ali leans on piano driven production by underground legend Ant, and with these beats digs into his softer side by gushing comfort and telling playfully cruel stories bookended together by hooks that play in your head for hours. Ali’s finest work to date would not be complete without the occasional flip into his famous sermons about the struggles of the minorities in a country that wishes nothing more than for you to fail, and how they set such a system of failure up.

Best Tracks: “Pray For Me” & “Out Of Here” 

30: Kelela - Take Me Apart

Genre: R&B / Electronic

Sounds of a living breathing world, clashing with synthetic bangs and swells that can be created by none other than an all-star cast of renowned artists create together a pocket for Kelela, an R&B songstress in the making. In her voice you hear to subtle hints of Solange and Janet Jackson, and like Jackson, at any moment Kelela can send out a rush of sound from her body that will make your heart stop and make you want to wail long. Subtle and powerful, heart ache and self-discovery, these dualities are attributes the singer seems to master to early in a career that is just beginning.

Best Tracks: “Frontline” & “Waitin’” 

29: FKJ - French Kiwi Juice

Genre: Fusion Jazz

Of all the albums that were released this year, none are more enjoyable than this electro-tropical project by the French multi-instrumentalist. Every beat takes you into a different garden of sounds and color, yet they all tie together as beautifully as a tropical paradise. Creating an album as pleasant and replayable as this with little vocals is a gift on it’s own, and this is a gift FKJ posses wholeheartedly.

Best Tracks: “Lying Together” & “Skyline”

28: Vince Staples - Big Fish Theory

Genre: Experimental Hip-Hop / Electronic

Vince Staples is the king of nihilism. His newest electronic based LP gives insight to a world we haven't reached yet, but will be at soon. Yet as observant of the negativity festering in the world as this project it is, it doubles as the background music at a house party only our great-grandkids will be able to speak about. Hip-Hop music at it’s core is electronic music with rhymes over top of it, and Vince stretches what we view as hip-hop into a world not as aggressive as Grime music, but more relaxed then electro-rap album like those made by Death Grips and Kanye West. Vince has shown he has no intent on slowing down his creative pushes whether it be gritty street tales or electronic tales of the drawbacks fame gives.

Best Tracks: “Big Fish” & “Love Can Be…”

Sounds Like: Outkast’s “Stankonia”

27: Dirty Projectors - Dirty Projectors

Genre: Indie Pop / Electronic

Experimentation is a trait of one of the most critically acclaimed albums of the 21st century, and Dirty Projectors has enough of that to spare. Oozing with melodic vocal layerings, to the point you can’t tell if a computer program or a real person is singing, that glide seamlessly over pianos and electronic production, David Longstreth shows out yet again as a leading vocalist and main man behind a band that digs so deep that it seems outlandish.

Best Tracks: “Up In Hudson” & “Winner Take Nothing”

Sounds Like: Bon Iver’s “22, A Million”

26: Cosmo Pyke - Just Cosmo

Genre: Indie Rock / Anti-Pop

A teen and his guitar has been the starting tools of revolutions in music since the dawn of recorded music. And like those who came before him Cosmo Pyke brings with him a sound and style all his own. Acts from his home country of England have created music like his before and since the release of this debut EP, but Cosmo’s songwriting is bounds above the rest. Cherry tales of young love and typical slacker appeal meld into a pile of beautiful tunes showing a raw skill within the a star in the making.

Best Track: “Chronic Sunshine”

25: Rapsody - Laila’s Wisdom

Genre: Hip-Hop

From the intro with a flurry of choirs and keys into the outro with a haunting sample loop, Rapsody issues out a flurry of bars that challenge any active rapper. The leader of 9th Wonder's Jamla record label has been hard at work leveling up her skills to stand toe to toe with any and anyone that comes her way. Rapsody separates herself from the lip gloss and leathered up mold that most of today’s biggest female rappers tend to lean towards, and in that separation she fits in with the true emcees of the world rather than those on the quest for pop success. Even though bar for bar she is a problem, Rapsody took tracks like “Sassy” to speak on topics a male artist may not be able to properly deliver, another advantage for one of the Carolina’s finest artists.

Best Tracks: “Nobody” & “You Should Know”

24: Brockhampton - The Saturation Trilogy

Genre: Alternative Hip-Hop

This year rap was heralded as the new go-to genre for what makes up pop music. Streaming has revealed what we within the culture have already known, and with this new claim that rap is the new pop a boy band has come to the forefront of the genre. 2017 saw Brockhampton release 3 astounding albums with a loose concept surrounding the group’s dive into illegal crime and eventual imprisonment that is also loosely followed in their videos. Playing from the first instalment through to the third Ameer Vann, Kevin Abstract and Dom McLennon take the lead with the most time on record, but still making room for Matt Champion, Merlyn Wood, Joba and Bearface to shine and come into their own in front of eyes. Brockhampton took over the year with experimental production styles and an overload of witty auto-tuned soaked verses, giving a new view into what it means to be a hip-hop group.

Best Tracks: “GOLD”, “QUEER” & “BLEACH”

23: Wiki - No Mountains In Manhattan

Genre: East Coast Hip-Hop

New York City has done it’s best over the past decade to reclaim hip-hop music from it’s Southern counterpart, Atlanta. The City’s newest artists have tried their best to copy the sound, but most have failed. In the grimiest parts of the city though, is where artists like Wiki were born. Playing like a love letter to the city here the Ratking leader was born and raised, with at every turn and twist comes a yurp and freshly opened 40. A 16 track dive into the beauty of New York City gives a perspective that has been missing from hip-hop. No bitterness, no pleas for mainstream success, just the sonic version of Wiki’s toothless smile gleaming in the middle of Washington Square Park.

Best Tracks: “Mayor” and “Litt 15”

22: Sinjin Hawke: First Opus

Genre: Electronic 

A one time go to Kanye collaborator, Sinjin Hawke used reject beats and his futuristic vision to create a soundtrack of everyday life 200 years from now in an LP that could double as a score for a Ridley Scott film. Electronic music is the final frontier of music as an artform, and with one of the most ambitious and original compositions over the past decade Sinjin sets himself alongside other visionaries like Flying Lotus, Aphex Twin and Burial.

Best Tracks: “Shimmer” & “Flood Gates”

Sounds Like: Flying Lotus’ “Los Angeles”

21: Kamasi Washington - Harmony Of Difference

Genre: Jazz

Jazz music has been bastardized over decades into elevator music with little more then the occasional true jazz album to pierce the mold. Thanks to Flying Lotus and his Brainfeeder label jazz has been able to be reborn and re-envisioned thanks to the likes of the saxophonist Kamasi Washington. Constant intricate changes allow Washington to expand upon previous ideas revealed and hashed out in his groundbreak album “The Epic”. As each day passes Kamasi becomes more and more skilled along with each member of his ever expanding band. As long as time passes, Kamasi’s skill will grow, and so will his ambition to bring jazz back to greatness,

Best Track: “Truth”

Sounds Like: John Coltrane’s “A Love Supreme”

20: Milo - Who Told You To Think??!!?!?!?!

Genre: Underground Hip-Hop

Entering into the dreamlike escapade crafted and materialized by the philosophy loving Milo can push away the casual fan. Milo has reared his head yet again coming off and tweaking the formula that crafted his acclaimed sophomore LP “So The Flies Don’t Come”. The beautiful instrumentals and hooks that play more as drunken chants real in a fan of hip-hop music, but the deeper you read into the verses the references and vocabulary are so obscure you wonder if you truly love it. The nose-to-the-sky feeling given off is one that can be to much for most, but pushing back against this can lead into loving a project that is one of a kind.

Best Tracks: “Sorcerer” & “Landscaping”

19: St. Vincent - MASSEDUCTION

Genre: Alternative Pop 

St. Vincent’s newest endeavor takes a dive into the power of seduction in different facets of life. The seduction that power can cause in the eyes of other, to the seduction ability one has with someone they know so well. Coupled with her astounding mastery of guitar and different production styles allows a backdrop to the world of seduction within the coastal bubbles Clark resides. Nothing this year sounds like what has been crafted on this tight knit LP, mostly because no one can do what St. Vincent does.

Best Tracks: “Masseduction” & “Sugarboy”

Sounds Like: Prince’s “Under The Cherry Moon”

18: Drake - More Life

Genre: Hip-Hop / R&B

Drake has done his best to try and destroy being labeled anything more specific than an artist. Actor, singer, rapper, producer and tastemaker are all titles that can’t sum up Drake and his creativity. Labeling his newest endeavor a “playlist” and refusing to submit it to the Grammy’s is just another chapter in Drake pushing and bending what labels are. Featuring some of the best records in Drake’s catalog while putting on personal friends and musical inspirations like Sampha, Skepta, Kanye West, Jorja Smith and Giggs all in one verbose package is something that if someone proposed the idea a year ago no one would believe. The Canadian artist has once again melded R&B and Hip-Hop like only he can, while throwing in sprinkles of everything else that makes the 6 God who he is.

Best Tracks: “Free Smoke” & “Teenage Fever”

17: SZA - CTRL

Genre: R&B

Love lost and relationships broken will always be a topic in music. Beaten to death at times, but the greats can find ways to originally tell their story. Though speculation of who the album is about has pointed into some interesting places to raise the profile of the songs, the music speaks for itself. Each and every track is filled with cries of a woman trying to discover herself, and what she is worth.  A album wrapped in equal parts whimsical warmth and modern day R&B sound sets SZA on path to be another TDE powerhouse in mainstream and critical circles.

Best Tracks: “Garden” & “Broken Clocks”

16: Oddisee - The Iceberg

Genre: Hip-Hop

As far as underground hip-hop goes in 2017, and to the sub-genre as a whole, rarely will you come across a talent who values songwriting and hooks as much as they care about being a master of lyrics and experimentation. That is where Oddisee comes in. He has made conscious decisions to avoid crossing into the mainstream, mainly because he doesn't have the want to be famous. “The Iceberg” tells a message the world needs to hear, a message of acceptance and growing up in a damaged world. No other artist has checked off as many boxes as Oddisee, and all his talents are shown to a new level across this newest LP.  

Best Tracks: “Built By Pictures” & “Want To Be”

15: Sampha - Process

Genre: Soul / Electronic 

There is beauty in the simple things. A breezy morning, rain as you go to bed. The beautiful simple things. After a hiatus in the wake of the death of his mother Sampha returned with tear welling songs and ballads that remind you how beautiful minimalism and simplicity can be. One of the most gut wrenching tracks somes in the form a piano ballad dedicated to the love his late mother had given him, and as his pain wells out the gorgeous voice that sounds like none other begs to be repeated again and again.

Best Tracks: “Blood On Me” & “Kora Sings”

Sounds Like: James Blake’s “Overgrown”

14: Thundercat - Drunk

Genre: Psychedelic Jazz

An entry into the mind of the world renowned bassist, “Drunk” plays like a jazzed out Frank Zappa project, with themes varying from a love song about his cat to his love of anime and the city of Tokyo. A sonic expansion from his previous album “Apocalypse”  Thundercat tag teams through the album with his label head and close friend Flying Lotus weaving deeper and deeper into the trenches of this jazz filled paradise. As the album turns from waking up joyously hungover, into returning to the same bottle again, the album title resonates hard into the closing tracks. Drunken journeys into one’s own mind along with a meddling ADHD odyssey is challenging his previous album as some of the most important work in modern jazz, and slowly grows into the victour.

Best Tracks: “Uh Uh” & “Show You The Way”

13: Kendrick Lamar - DAMN.

Genre: Hip-Hop

The best active rapper out right now is the Compton-bred MC, and though this album cemented a portion of Kendrick’s attributes that he’s always lacked in (album sales & streams) it is still a questionable project by Lamar’s standards. Thought “FEAR” and “DUCKWORTH” are some of the best tracks Kendrick has ever released, the project will not live on through the overall make-up. The concept of the record and the conspiracy theories that circled around it along with astronomical sales will keep this album in West Coast loar. Don’t be confused, this is a very good project with everything you could ever ask from a single artist to meld into one body of work, yet by Kendricks standard, it is a dip in the wrong direction.

Best Tracks: “FEAR.” & “XXX.”

12: The Alchemist & Budgie - The Good Book Vol. 2

Genre: Instrumental Hip-Hop / Underground Hip-Hop

As music evolves more technologically and in structure, gospel music becomes more and more interesting in today’s world. Religion is a tongue and cheek topic for most, but the music when done right is astounding regardless of message. Give these records to the legendary producer Alchemist and the equally exciting and underrated Budgie, along with their Rolodex of super skilled friends, the ceiling is non-existent. A two disc 96 minute odyssey into underground hip-hop weaved together by samples from a lost time in musical history is one of (if not the) best producer lead albums of the past decade.

Best Tracks: “No Mystery God” & “In-N-Out”

Sounds Like: The Avalanches “Wildflower”

11: Tennyson - Uh Oh!

Genre: Electronic

The brother / sister duo has returned with another EP highlighted by the sounds of a futuristic city like nothing you can see in film. A dream world filled with bird chirps, high paced drums, and the clanging together of whatever you can find in the depths of your production software. Limited singing gives way for one to long for the calming voice to return to give another layer of beauty to an already overloaded roster of sound and audio color that is a part of a spearheaded movement of dense and upbeat electronic compositions.

Best Track: “Pegasus.exe”

10: Lil Uzi Vert - Luv Is Rage 2

Genre: Alternative Hip-Hop

You will not find a more fun album to blast at full volume then the newest edition to Lil Uzi Vert’s newest venture. “Luv Is Rage 2” was in purgatory for months by Don Cannon, DJ Drama, and Altantic Records due to the success of the smash lead single “XO Tour Llif3”, and once released the hundred of thousands within the internet community that birthed Uzi went wild, sending the album straight to #1. A sonic carnival, lead by the shoulder rolling ringmaster himself with lyrics of love lost, youthful energy and a dangerous amount of drug use, is a project that will be looked back as a seminal release from this generation of SoundCloud birthed artists, and possibly this era of music in general. 

Best Tracks: “Neon Guts” & “The Way Life Goes”

9: Big K.R.I.T. - 4Eva Is A Mighty Long Time

Genre: Southern Hip-Hop

The great return of Big K.R.I.T. years in the making. A double disc dive into the duality of K.R.I.T’s musical ventures exemplifies his versatility in a way the major label system never properly handled. The first side shows the mainstream crossover ability that always had shown glimpses over his career, while also showing an aggressive and hungry delivery to be considered one of the generation's greats. On the flip side of the album, we are shown into Justin Scott’s (K.R.I.T.’s real name) way of thinking. An inclusion of live instruments and a deeper message accompanied with a dive into the psyche of K.R.I.T. as a man in his past and today. The return of the Southern star show’s a rebirth of a career that belongs to be put next to today's and all of history's greats.

Best Tracks: “The Light” & “Mixed Messages”

Sounds Like: Outkast’s “ATLiens”

8: Open Mike Eagle - Brick Body Kids Still Daydream

Genre: Underground Hip-Hop

Chicago is never out of the news for long, whether it be tales of murder and destruction, or the flip side featuring political change and community outreach. Somewhere in the middle Open Mike Eagle sits doodling a satiristic world to describe it all. An ode to the Robert Taylor projects where Eagle grew up in, along with over 20,000 other people, Mike speaks of himself in many mythical ways whether it be a hero within the building, or the homes themselves. The two features Eagle allowed into his brick and mortar universe were standouts, especially the early verse from the show stealing Sammus. Conceptually it is one of a kind, proving again Open Mike Eagle and the underground which he meddles in, is a land of opportunity.

Best Tracks: “Legendary Iron Hood” & “Happy Wasteland Day”

Sounds Like: Aesop Rock’s “Labor Days”

7: Future - HNDRXX

Genre: Hip-Hop / R&B 

Future has reached the point in his career where he can sit back and watch the world spin around him. Every new artist has a piece of Future in their DNA, and Future could live of his major records and the occasional feature for life. Yet he took the creative risk of making a full R&B album, a project that does have rapping but to a minimal amount in the same vein as early Drake. The soul splitting auto tune melodies speaking possibly of his ex relationships with Ciara and the wife of Scottie Pippen, and the drugs to mellow the pain of lost love and past memories. “Dirty Sprite 2” was an angry and hungry Future, attacking the world, while “HNDRXX” comes off as the yang to DS2’s ying, and shows range but a living legend.  

Best Tracks: “My Collection” & “Solo” 

Sounds Like: Drake’s “Take Care”

6: Jay-Z - 4:44

Genre: Hip-Hop

The President of Hip-Hop himself, Jay-Z shows a further evolution in an already storied discography. Jay has been personal in the past, but never in such an intimate setting. Done in the span of a few weeks with the legendary No ID, these sessions gave us the final product of the most personal a mainstream artist, especially of Jay’s stature. Bringing to light secrets and public questions of Hov’s relationships with his wife Beyonce, tips on building a fortune, his parents, and on-again-off-again little brother Kanye, to finally give his side of each story. The persona of the corner boy turned CEO has almost never shown any vulnerability, and all these decades later these internal feelings finally see the light in the form of a golden standard in late career work.

Best Tracks: “Marcy Me” & “Family Feud”

Sounds Like: Nas’ “Life Is Good”

5: King Krule - The OOZ

Genre: Alternative

King Krule has revealed himself from his self-induced seclusion and has gone back into his most popular musical identity, taking a break from the dubstep and hip-hop laced corners of the internet he took shelter in. On his 70 minute plunge into the mucky bowels of London, Archy brings with him equal parts angst, longing and hazy production to tell tales of relationships and isolation, but mostly focusing on painting a Greek tragedy with words and guitars. Feeling and emotion personified via a hissing and empty void in between each vocal wail, reminding us how raw uncut emotion is the underlying factor in all great art, and Archy Marshall slops and gushes emotion in layers like no other act can.

Best Tracks: “Dum Surfer” & “Biscuit Town”

4: Run The Jewels - Run The Jewels 3

Genere: Alternative Hip-Hop

Killer Mike and El-P are the best hip-hop duo since Outkast. With their third project the best group in rap music solidifies themselves yet again as the inventive and aggressive showboaters they are, with a more intense dive into El-P’s synth filled world. El and Mike touch on the capitalistic and ever changing world we are in, playing into the dystopian sci-fi tropes the group has separately gone into many times before. Their first project was an introduction, the second project was the group talking more of the world around them, and with this third time around, the tag team becomes more aggressive than ever while mixing in the best parts of everything they have ever done across thier individually storied careers. 

Best Tracks: “Call Ticketron” & “Everybody Stay Calm”

3: Tyler The Creator - Scum Fuck Flower Boy

Genre: Alternative Hip-Hop

With his 5th full length solo project Tyler has solidified himself as one of, if not the, most influential artist of this generation. In a class with the Kendricks, Coles, K.R.I.T.’s, and Drakes of the world, Tyler has found a way to stand alone. This self produced masterpiece is Tyler's musical dreams and ambitions personified and laced with beautiful guest features that fit in ways that bring to mind more of a band then a solo album with features. Yet as beautiful as the music sounds, the lyrics are focused on loneliness, acceptance, paranoia and depression. Since the beginning Ty has had albums based in an original narrative about a boy speaking with his therapist and the events surrounding it, and to break the mold a whole new layer of vulnerability was added. 2018 was a year that showed Tyler gaining a TV show, a new shoe line, a store in Los Angeles, another sold out self-produced festival, and this 14 track artwork shows us again how important originality is. Nothing can, or will stop Tyler.

Best Tracks: “See You Again” & “Pothole”

2: Daniel Caesar - Freudian

Genre: Soul

Production can be replicated. Lyrics can be replicated. A voice though,  can almost never be replicated. The range Caesar flexes across the 10 track debut LP is breathtaking in ways words cannot describe. Daniels music puts you in a state of mind, a flashback into the worst part of any relationship, but with a sprinkle of hope at the end. From sensual duets, to songs of longing a lyrical range to complement his vocal range is apparent and beautiful. Caesars gospel background comes as no surprise with the amount of soul and pain he can easily place into each run. Leading a pack of young soul and R&B artists, Caesar has a future ahead like none we have ever seen. 

Best Tracks: “We Find Love” & “Get You”

1: Smino - Blkswn

Genre: Alternative Hip-Hop

40 years since hip-hop was founded in New York City the genre has expanded musically from scratched up James Brown records into inclusion of every instrument and production style under the sun. And yet evolution is still eternally coming. Monte Booker, who produced on 16 of the 18 tracks has sculpted an ever tweaking and twitching paradise for Smino to fit his elastic flow and wordplay into every crevice of the intricate electronic based beats. Vocal layering and ad-libs used in ways rare to find in any genre add depth to records instead of being used as corny catch phrases like most utilize them for. Tales of drunken nights and lost lives spoken with Smino’s unique drawl and vocal tone recieve a kind of depth and playfulness combined that gives way to comparisons to Chicago MC’s Saba and Chance The Rapper .The St. Louis scene hasn’t seen much talent since the early aughts when Nelly ruled the world with a platinum fist, but now the city (along with new home Chicago) can claim the innovative minds Smino and Monte Booker.  

Best Tracks: “Father Son, Holy Smoke” & “B Role”

[junker-town]

NFL Dad, Week 9: Standard time and Blair Walsh ruined my Sunday

Relive Sunday's action with one dad, two toddlers, and six hours of the RedZone channel.

Welcome back to standard time! I hope everyone enjoyed their extra hour of sleep when the clocks fell back, except for the tiny segment of the population that is children and people who live with children.

There’s a common refrain around the internet that daylight saving time is bad. Au contraire! It’s standard time that’s a scourge upon our land. I’m fine with when the sun rises and sets during spring and summer. But at no point during the fall am I like, “Y’know what? I’ve been enjoying my circadian rhythms, but I just wish it was dark outside when I left work.”

And I know that EVERY parent bitches about the time change, but let me just pile on: A one-hour time change WRECKS young children. My son was a disaster all day just because America wanted to save energy a hundred years ago during World War I. Let’s spring forward next year and never go back.

EARLY GAMES, FIRST HALF

— We’ve got seven games on the early docket, and it’s not a promising slate. Falcons-Panthers is the only game between two winning teams, and calling the Falcons a “winning team” feels like a stretch. Leonard Fournette is suspended by the Jags for a violation of team rules for their home tilt against the Bengals. Brock Osweiler has returned to the Broncos’ starting lineup for the first time since 2015, the season he won the Super Bowl with the team (LOLOLOL, but also: he went 5-2 as a starter that season). And in some alternate, better universe, Colts-Texans features Andrew Luck versus Deshaun Watson. Here in Shitworld, it’s Jacoby Brissett-Tom Savage.

— Brissett quickly excuses himself from the shitty quarterback conversation with one of the first big plays of the day, a 45-yard touchdown bomb to T.Y. Hilton on a post route. It’s a great throw by Brissett, made even better by the complete absence of a safety to help on the deep ball.

PERFECT pass by @JBrissett12. And @TYHilton13 makes the grab! Touchdown, @Colts! #Colts http://pic.twitter.com/vijqVMrrft

— NFL (@NFL) November 5, 2017

— Philadelphia is wearing their all-black uniforms, which smacks of desperate, capitalistic opportunism. The Eagles aren’t a black team; they’re a green and white team. Their attempt to pivot away from kelly green and act like black is one of their colors (“Look at the outline of the eagle!”) is a corporate swindle to sell jerseys.

These are the NFL teams with a claim to going black-on-black:

Raiders

Ravens

Steelers

Falcons

Saints

Maaaaaybe the Jaguars, and only because they were born in the ‘90s and deserve a reprieve from teal. (“Teal: Give us a break, Kurt Cobain was still alive.”)

— The Ravens execute a successful fake punt near midfield. (“The Ravens: Special teams is our offense.”) That leads to a 3rd and 10 inside the red zone, which Joe Flacco solves by throwing a swing pass for one yard. Please, wear a surgical mask and goggles if you have to watch this offense. Baltimore kicks a field goal to go up 3-0.

— It’s 3rd and 12 for the Jags near midfield, which means it’s time for an off-target throw from Blake Bortles. But wait, there’s a twist!

This grab by @Air4Cole is just ridiculous. #Jaguars http://pic.twitter.com/aftjtpW7zW

— NFL (@NFL) November 5, 2017

Keelan Cole snatches the overthrow, and keep your eye on this rising star. Catching horribly thrown balls is how Odell Beckham made his name in the NFL.

With the Jags set up in the red zone, they soon face a 3rd and 7, which means it’s time for a Bortles deflection at the line of scrimmage. A Bengals defender drops the easy interception, and the Jags kick a field goal to take a 3-0 lead.

— The rout is on in Philadelphia. Carson Wentz sells play-action and rolls right, lofting a pass to Alshon Jeffery, who’s beaten his defender down the sideline. It’s a 32-yard touchdown.

.@cj_wentz + @TheWorldof_AJ… It’s an @eagles TOUCHDOWN! #FlyEaglesFly http://pic.twitter.com/h7o5S0TDby

— NFL (@NFL) November 5, 2017

I know I said “the rout is on” for a 7-3 lead, but in my defense, Osweiler is quarterbacking the Broncos. I feel supremely confident about the way this one’s gonna go.

— It’s 1:30, and my son is refusing to nap. We took the kids out earlier than usual this morning, because they were up at their “usual’ time, which was suddenly 6 a.m. instead of 7 a.m. (BURN DOWN THE GOVERNMENT.)

Anyway, because my daughter learned to pee in her little potty this week, we owed her a treat, so we put the kids in the stroller for a 30-minute walk to an old-timey soda shop to get an ice cream sundae. But because my son was so burned out by the time change, he fell asleep on the way back home. We didn’t think it was a big deal — a 25-minute disco nap before lunch shouldn’t preclude a real nap at 1:30 — but guess what? IT VERY MUCH PRECLUDED THE NAP.

— The Rams, in the red zone, pull off a kind of wide receiver screen that’s actually a hook-and-lateral to Tavon Austin? It doesn’t go in for a touchdown, but it’s a fresh use of Austin after he wilted in Jeff Fisher’s care. Sean McVay is gonna win Coach of the Year just because he’s an upgrade from Rotting Jack-O’-Lantern With a Mustache.

— Marcus Mariota throws a perfect play-action pass to Rishard Matthews for a touchdown, and Matthew celebrates with a surf celebration that includes paddling out into the waves. I respect the realism! The Titans lead 10-3.

Marcus Mariota finds @_RMatthews for the @titans TD... Surf’s up! #TitanUp http://pic.twitter.com/iwP26VlRCV

— NFL (@NFL) November 5, 2017

— This is gonna shock you, but Brock Osweiler has thrown an interception. The Eagles start a drive on the Broncos 15 and score three plays later. It’s 17-3, Eagles, and the rout is more on than before.

— Jacksonville has had ball for 15 minutes compared to five for the Bengals, but the Jags only have a 3-0 lead to show for it. But then Bortles throws a short touchdown to Marqise Lee to complete a 96-yard drive. Congratulations, Bengals, you let Blake Bortles lead a 96-yard drive without Leonard Fournette. Y’all should be relegated.

— With the Rams short of midfield and facing 3rd and 33, they throw a WR screen to Robert Woods … who scores a touchdown on the play. Relegate the Giants, too.

.@pfref has data going back to 1994. No team’s ever allowed a third-and-30+ conversion before the Giants just did https://t.co/smP4jRKdqQ

— Bill Barnwell (@billbarnwell) November 5, 2017

RedZone never even shows the Giants get the ball back. Next thing you know, Sammy Watkins is streaking for the end zone on a 67-yard TD pass. It’s 24-7 Rams, and I wash my hands of this bloodletting.

— I kinda breezed over it above, but I want to make it clear that when your 18-month-old child usually naps for 2-3 hours in the afternoon, then circumvents that with a 25-minute doze before noon, you don’t just have an awake kid instead of a sleeping kid. You have a walking tire fire instead of two hours of silence. I will run for office and/or lead a revolution to eliminate seasonal clock changes.

— (breaking news ticker sound) EXTRA! EXTRA! TOM SAVAGE ISN’T GOOD:

Tom Savage: 31.3 completion % today (5/16) No other player with 15+ attempts in any half this season has completed fewer than 35% of throws

— NFL Research (@NFLResearch) November 5, 2017

I mean, who could have seen that coming? Besides Bill O’Brien, I mean.

— My wife and I, exhausted by our son, are letting him click the lamp in our bedroom on and off with only the BAREST amount of supervision. His favorite things in the entire world are lamps, fans, clocks, and dogs. Give him one of those and there’s a 97% chance you have enough time to go pee before he does something potentially fatal.

— I would like to travel back in time and draft Alvin Kamara in all of my fantasy leagues.

Are you kidding, @A_kamara6?! What. A. Play. #GoSaints http://pic.twitter.com/zYpfE0e3Iq

— NFL (@NFL) November 5, 2017

— Holy cow! A.J. Green and Jalen Ramsey have both been ejected after Green LOST HIS MIND on Ramsey. Green gets credit for the choke-slam but loses it with the punches to Ramsey’s helmet. ALWAYS PUNCH THE GROIN, KIDS.

My initial reaction to this is that Ramsey must have been RELENTLESS in torturing Green throughout the first part of the game, because Green is one of the nicest, humblest super-humans to ever play wide receiver. Sure, as an elite wide receiver, he’s a driven competitor, but he’s not a Steve Smith-like Terminator in search of fights.

This makes me feel like a sappy bag of hugs — like the sort of hack NFL reporter who says, “I know Player X, and he would never hit a woman” — until I see Antonio Brown’s tweet confirming my suspicion:

that’s not like AJ !!!Not like AJ like he got great attitude something must be going on !

— Antonio Brown (@AB84) November 5, 2017

YES! Thank you, Antonio. I am not a crackpot.

— The Texans score a defensive TD with a sack-fumble that ends up in Lamarr Houston’s arms with a clear path to the end zone. Congrats Texans, it was either that or Tom Savage conjures the spirit of Deshaun Watson into his arm.

— Jay Ajayi made his name with the Dolphins by breaking off big plays in 2016. His failure to do so this season is part of the reason Miami shipped him to the Eagles before the deadline. What do you think was gonna happen?

Welcome to the @Eagles, @JayTrain23! #FlyEaglesFly http://pic.twitter.com/JtUwnTJQFw

— NFL (@NFL) November 5, 2017

EARLY GAMES, SECOND HALF

— While most of the games are in halftime, I take my dog out and bring my son along, rolling the dice on him walking instead of needing a stroller. The rain is light but steady, and he toddles along in his yellow rain slicker, splashing in puddles, petting the dog, and charming passersby on the sidewalk. It is a LOT better than any of the games on RedZone.

wet streets & blue steel

A post shared by Matt Ufford (@mattufford) on Nov 5, 2017 at 2:36pm PST

Don’t let him sucker you in; that cute face threw up in my hand yesterday. He was choking on some apple in his stroller, and I put my hand under his chin and told him to spit it out, and instead he coughed up the green smoothie he had for breakfast. It was the consistency of pea soup with ham and the color of Nickelodeon slime.

— I come back inside and it’s apparently 30-3 in New Orleans? Jameis Winston is out of the game, and it appears that the Bucs are just gonna take the whole season off. I’m beginning to feel like this season “Hard Knocks” was a government conspiracy filmed on a sound stage, like the moon landing.

Anyway, this isn’t quite A.J. Green/Jalen Ramsey, but Mike Evans goes high and to the right on Winston makes this the chippiest hour of RedZone I’ve ever seen.

Jameis Winston out here trying to play tag and Mike Evans just wants to fight everyone. #Bucs http://pic.twitter.com/CMZqRHwFia

— Clay Wendler (@ClayWendler) November 5, 2017

— One of my favorite plays: the ballcarrier goes down without contact, no defender touches him, and he gets up and keeps running. In this case, T.Y. Hilton goes 80 yards for the score:

He wasn't touched! 80-YARD TOUCHDOWN FOR @TYHILTON13! #Colts http://pic.twitter.com/vYdSO5E8NO

— NFL (@NFL) November 5, 2017

That’s good for a 17-7 Colts lead late in the third quarter. Deshaun Watson would have five touchdowns and this game would be 48-17 if knee ligaments weren’t so stupid.

— The Jaguars get a 63-yard punt return to go up 23-7. Good night, Bengals. Go join the Bucs in the “mailing your season in” holding pen.

— The Falcons are down 10 and just outside field goal range, so they go for it on 4th and 7. Unbelievably, Matt Ryan finds Julio Jones running free, wide open in the end zone. The ball hits Jones in the hands, but he drops the ball. I am gobsmacked. Trigger warning on this one, folks:

Just the perfectly constructed wide receiver getting open by 10 yards and dropping a perfectly thrown ball on 4th down that would have been an essential score. I’m not even a Falcons fan, and this one shakes up my world a little.

— Look at this burning trash barge:

Very good quarterbacks are quarterbacking http://pic.twitter.com/kcD465izBV

— Bill Barnwell (@billbarnwell) November 5, 2017

WOOF. Just a Viking funeral pyre of used diapers and coffee cups.

But then, something strange happens. Tom Savage really DOES conjure the spirit of Deshaun Watson into his arm.

.@TomSavage03's first career TD pass... And it was GORGEOUS.@deandrehopkins on the receiving end! #Texans http://pic.twitter.com/6Zh5tcSgwN

— NFL (@NFL) November 5, 2017

The Texans are alive in this game, but also not, because: Tom Savage. That was a nice throw on the touchdown, but c’mon: we’ve all seen enough Tom Savage to know what’s up.

— I crack open my daughter’s door at 3:45. She’s gone the other way with the time change: napping too much. And it’s a travesty to wake a child from a nap, but I also need her to be able to fall asleep tonight.

— Atlanta scores a touchdown with 3:25 remaining. They now trail 20-17 instead of taking the lead. They’re really gonna try to make this look like a comeback, aren’t they?

OK, so they get the ball back with enough time to drive for a game-tying field goal. they don’t go anywhere and Matt Ryan misses the throw on 4th down. What a bunch of assholes.

Matt Ryan's lips are mesmerizing @TheFalcoholic http://pic.twitter.com/LxxVNhIXhi

— Clay Wendler (@ClayWendler) November 5, 2017

LATE GAMES, FIRST HALF

— There are three late games today. Cardinals-49ers and Washington-Seahawks get underway before the week’s only enticing matchup, Chiefs-Cowboys, kicks off at 4:25 Eastern.

— I’m going to pause the stream-of-consciousness act for a moment. I’ve gone back and forth with how I want to talk about this Seahawks game, and I’ve decided I’m not going to relive all the agonizing dipshittery my favorite team pulled off today: 16 penalties, two Russell Wilson interceptions, two dropped interceptions by the defense, two failed 2-point conversions, and THREE missed field goals. Ah, so THAT’S the Blair Walsh who missed a 27-yarder in the playoffs. Good times. At least it wasn’t a close game.

Anyway, here’s some pigs on the field before the game.

No idea why but a bunch of pigs on the field in Seattle. Maybe to welcome The Hogs? http://pic.twitter.com/zIja3TmmyK

— JP Finlay (@JPFinlayNBCS) November 5, 2017

— My nanny got my son a plastic drum that lights up and plays music. There are two volume settings: rock concert and jet engine. It’s awful. My son loves it.

You know, as much as I love our kids being socialized and having access to modern medicine, a part of me DOES long for a cabin in the woods where their only toys are whatever rocks and sticks they can find. Would they get eaten by mountain lions? MAYBE. But if not, they’d be so resilient and self-sufficient!

— Patrick Peterson’s long interception return sets up a short field for Arizona’s offense, and Drew Stanton finds Jaron Brown on 3rd and goal for the touchdown. It’s already 10-0 in Santa Clara, and I have some doubts about C.J. Beathard’s ability to lead this team out of the hole. More sideline shots of Jimmy Garoppolo! My eyes demand it!

— This is unrelated to any game I want to talk about, but Bobby Wagner is a missile with arms.

— Kansas City and Dallas are off to a slow start, but a Cole Beasley touchdown finally opens the scoring late in the first quarter. It was a nice drive for Cowboys; I think that Dak Prescott guy has a real future in the NFL.

— My wife Facetimes with her parents, and the cacophony stresses me out: the TV, two toddlers (one of which is constantly at the edge of crying), my wife speaking loudly to be heard, and my (very lovely) in-laws. I try to mute the TV, but nothing happens. I then get up to retrieve the batteries to the remote, because ... toddlers.

— My daughter is wearing a black tee shirt with the Wu-Tang logo and “IS FOR THE CHILDREN” printed on it. Over this, she wears a pink ballet leotard. This sums up her entire aesthetic nicely.

She brings over a small bowl of cashews, climbs onto the couch, and sits next to me. I say, “Oh, you brought me cashews!” as I take one, because Stock Dad is the role I was born to play. But then she feeds me a cashew, so I feed her one. And we go on that way until the bowl is empty. There’s football on TV, I guess.

— In the final minute of the half, Dak Prescott completes a pass to Terrence Williams for a big gain to set up first and goal for Cowboys. A play or two later, Dak escapes the pocket and runs it in himself. The Cowboys will go into the locker room with a 14-3 lead.

... UNLESS Andy Reid calls a downfield screen to Tyreek Hill and the Cowboys tackle like adults in a kids movie.

Credit to Andy Reid for the play design and Tyreek Hill for being the kind of player who only needs three blockers for eight defenders, but also: THIS IS THE MOST ALEX SMITH HAIL MARY POSSIBLE. “I’ll just throw the ball 42 yards short of where it needs to be and let my playmakers do the work.”

LATE GAMES, SECOND HALF

— Our neighbors come over so our kids can hang out. My apartment now has four adults, three toddlers, one baby, and one dog in it, plus 52 Seahawks shitting the bed on TV (Bobby Wagner is the lone holdout).

— C.J. Beathard scores a touchdown to cut the Cardinals’ lead to 14-10, but I’m not going to write any more about this game for two reasons: (1) The Niners are just going to lose anyway, and (2) I still have my dignity. Yes, I used my hand as a vomit cup, but I DID IT WITH MY HEAD HELD HIGH. I’m too old to pretend to give a shit about Drew Stanton and C.J. Beathard game.

— The Chiefs are trailing 14-10 but get it into the red zone with a read-option keeper on 3rd and 1. This has been a nice drive for them; Andy Reid clearly made some halftime adjustments that solidified their running game. Reid would be the best coach in the game if his brain didn’t turn into jellied pork fat after the 2-minute warning.

Alex Smith finds Travis Kelce in the corner of the end zone to give the Chiefs the lead. He and some teammates celebrate with a sack race:

This is at least the third celebration that’s just pretending to play a children’s game (the Vikings had Duck, Duck, Goose/Grey Duck, and JuJu Smith-Schuster played hide-and-seek), and everyone online seems to be eating this stuff up.

And compared to what the NFL used to allow, these are good celebrations! Everyone’s having fun, and that’s a big leap forward for the NFL. But I also feel like we’re going to look back on this time and say, “Really? We thought it was ‘awesome’ that the preplanned touchdown celebration was adults playing children’s games?”

I know I sound like Grumpy Dad, but dads are also right when they tell you that you deserve better. So demand better. Or keep losing your mind over Ring Around the Rosie, do what you like. I’m going to save my praise for the first receiving corps to perform the “Single Ladies” dance.

— Zeke Elliott scores to put the Cowboys up 21-17. That caps a 12-play, 75-yard drive in which nine of the plays were runs. There are still 18 minutes to play, but the writing on the wall is clear: If the Chiefs struggle to score in the final quarter, the Cowboys running game will grind them down, season them, put them in casing, and serve with ribs. Also I may be writing this while very hungry.

— After the 49ers give up a field goal, I tell my daughter, “That’s mommy’s favorite team. My favorite team is the blue team, the Seahawks.”

“What’s my favorite team?” she asks.

Oh boy. “Your favorite team is whatever team you decide you like best,” I say through gritted teeth, my dreams dying.

RedZone flips to a close-up on the Cowboys, who have just scored again to put the game out of reach. “What’s THAT team?” she asks. NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

[psychistsoulhealer-blog]

A Process Of Transformation phases in life (& How To Manage It) The process of transformation is rarely a perfect, linear path that we walk though with grace and ease. Rather we are often thrown in to a messy process of change, re-organisation and temporary chaos. If we don’t take a broader perspective to see the beautiful and perfect, divine process that is unfolding, we can easily feel like our life is falling apart. If we react with fear to this process we will find ourselves clinging, controlling and becoming wracked with anxiety. When things fall away we will perceive them as losses and will feel grief, fear and pain as they leave our life. We may resist the growth and opportunities we are being called towards. We will fight against the current that is calling us in new directions. But if we can understand that we are in a process of transformation, and embrace the learnings that are present for us, we can glide through it with so much more peace and ease.please know you are not alone. Your life is up-levelling and incredible new things are on their way to you, so take a deep breath, let go and flow with the process. Often we feel things Are Falling Apart & Falling Away Clearing away of the old is necessary to create space and a clean slate to lay new foundations and build more authentic structures. Many of us struggle with letting go, as we fear the space that will be created and we have no idea who we are without these external forms that define us. This can be one of the most scary and unsettling times.When things in our life begin to crumble around us, it can trigger feelings of anxiety, grief and the desire to cling. On a deep level there is a part of you that is ready to call in the new, which is why this letting go process has began. You are making room. You are re-building. One some level you have shifted within you, and so the world around you is now changing to reflect that. How To Manage This: Surrender completely and let it happen. Trust whole-heartedly and have complete faith that there is a divine process unfolding. You may not understand it yet, but on some level what is leaving is no longer aligned with your highest good. New things are on their way, you just have to trust the process and be patient. It is likely you will find yourself battling between the conflicting desires of your head and heart. You will experience confusion when your heart and soul are wanting to speak up but your mind is questioning and over-analysing. You’re Not Getting The Results You Used To Get The actions that used to create certain results, are no longer reaping the same rewards. No matter how hard you try, things just don’t seem to work. You encounter barriers, brick-walls and obstacles at every turn. You are now being called to re-assess what you do, and why. Many of us act from a space of fear and need and this old way of being can no longer survive as you start to transform. When this happens, it is a powerful reminder to take our attention of what we are doing and return our focus to who we are being in our lives. If you have been defining yourself through your external results, if you have been searching for external forms of love, if you have been basing your self worth on what you do, then you are going to get a shake up. When things in your life stop working, it is a big fat sign that the way you have been doing things is not truly authentic and aligned. How To Manage This: Step away. Stop doing. Let go of the desire to continue to push, force and figure it out. If it isn’t flowing effortlessly then let it go. Bring your attention back to who you are being, how you feel and check in with the ways that fear is perhaps driving your actions. You Feel Drawn To Retreat & Go Internal As the world around you feels unsteady and uncertain, you may be feeling the call to retreat a little and turn inwards. Bringing our attention within ourselves and stepping away from the external world is a natural part of the transformation process. This is not about shutting off from the outside world, but rather re-defining your relationship with everything outside of you. The process of transformation provides incredible opportunity for inner learnings, expansion and growth. We can discover so much about ourselves. Bringing your attention inwards is about learning to fill yourself up so you can then overflow on the outside. It is about learning how to connect with yourself and find what you are seeking within you. How To Manage This: Show up for the inner work and take an inner inventory. How can you support your inner world and create feeling of peace, balance and serenity? Listen to yourself. Ask yourself what you need and learn to give to yourself. Open your heart to yourself and begin to love and appreciate who you are. . Relationships Are Ending & People Are Leaving Your Life So many of our relationships are created on the foundations of need, control and co-dependency and we don’t even realise it. We are in this dynamic with others where we expect them to make us feel how we want to feel and to be the source of our love. Any relationship that is infused with fear energy, will begin to become unsteady. The relationship will either fall away completely, or it will leave your life temporarily while you each go through a process of healing within yourself so that a new dynamic can be created between you. The new relationships you want to create are ones where two people are whole, complete and full within themselves and come together to play with each other, to create joy and to overflow so that they create a powerful life force between them. How To Manage This: Let them go. Notice your reactions and move through them. Let yourself feel the grief, pain and sadness. The process of fully feeling and releasing these emotions is incredibly healing. Old Ways Of Being Are No Longer Working When we are being called to up level our life and embody new ways of being, we are going to experience a period where our old ways of being stop working. Old patterns driven by fear, need, ego, attachment, control and force will cease to work and you will be called to embody more soulful, heart-driven and love-filled ways of being. As we start to become conscious to our unconscious parts it can be incredibly confronting. You may now learning how to re-define who you are and how you find your sense of self and get love. Use this as a chance to see where you have created false identities and ways of being that do not deeply serve you. Your purpose is being re-assessed and evaluated. You must become conscious and aware of the whybehind everything that you do now. How To Manage This: Begin to choose new ways of being. If you were to show up in a space of love and allow the energies of joy, inspiration, kindness, acceptance, peace, flow, passion, trust and soul guide your life, what would be different? Be aware of who you are being moment by moment and begin to make new choices. A New Energy Will Soon Rise Up As you start to create space within yourself and your world, new ideas will begin to bubble up into your conscious mind. As you create space by releasing what is no longer serving you and is not truly aligned, you will allow new guidance, energy and support to rush in. This new energy will begin by stirring within you, and it will soon begin to break through. As it rises, you must allow it to guide and lead you forward. This will feel new and unfamiliar so be gentle with yourself during this time. You may or may not know or understand these new ideas. They may challenge you and the way you are used to doing things. They may call you in to uncharted territory, to leave a relationship or to pursue a new career. They might call you to express parts of yourself that you have been suppressing. If you take your attention off the external, you will soon return to a state of inner balance and reconnect with the peace within you. Your life might look like a total mess, but if you are riding the wave of transformation and embracing the process you will soon find yourself dropping into a space of peace. Thank you Jai mata di

[itsworn]

Brothers Resurrect Their Father’s Beloved Wedge-Powered 1965 Plymouth Satellite as Surprise Birthday Present

In the spring of 1964, Jay Passon, 23, returned to his Hazleton, Pennsylvania, home after a four-year stint in the Army. He had been a mechanics specialist at Ft. Knox, Kentucky, responsible for keeping the military vehicles in working order. Not long afterward, he went to a nearby Ford dealership and placed an order for a new British Green 1964 Shelby Cobra equipped with the 427 engine and four-speed manual transmission. It was his dream car and one of the key things that kept him focused during his time in the military.

After four months, Jay visited the Ford dealership to find out the status of his order. He was disappointed to learn the Shelby factory had encountered delays in the production of the Cobra, even more so when the salesperson told him it would be another six to eight months before the Shelby arrived. Waiting a year for the Cobra to be built was out of the question, and he canceled the order.

Jay started doing some research and came up with a second choice. He’d recently read a magazine story about the 1965 Plymouth Satellite with the 426 Street Wedge engine package and decided to order one. He visited two local Chrysler and Plymouth dealerships, but neither wanted to be bothered with ordering high-performance muscle cars. Determined, Jay drove to Tamaqua, Pennsylvania, to visit Maff Motors. There he met owner Tony Maff, Sr., who agreed to place the order.

On November 10, Jay received the phone call he had been waiting for: His new 1965 Plymouth Satellite had arrived. Wasting no time, he made his way to the dealership and remembers it was “love at first sight. The look of the Satellite appealed to me, and I hadn’t even driven it.”

He took delivery the following day. During the drive home, he let the 426 Street Wedge loose. When he looked down at the speedometer, the needle hovering beyond 80 mph, he realized he’d only just put it in Third gear. Amazing! he thought.

Jay is a self-proclaimed lead foot. He says his first time behind the wheel of the Satellite took him to a place where he’d never gone in an automobile. He realized that buying the car was the right choice, even if it had not been the first choice.

Jay drove the Satellite only a short time before putting it in winter hibernation at the end of 1964. When spring arrived, he took it to the Cecil County Dragway and consistently ran quarter-mile times in the high 13-second range on the factory Goodyear Power Cushion tires. Determined to go faster, Jay picked up a set of gently used Atlas Bucron cheater slicks, and the car rewarded him with low-13-second passes.

After one season of drag racing, Jay relegated the Satellite to a less rigorous routine, using it for dates and Sunday cruising. He turned the muscle car into a fair-weather cruiser only driven on nice days and dry pavement. (To this day he says the car has never been rained on.)

In August 1971, his first son, Jeff, was born, and the car was stowed away and rarely driven. By the time Jamie was born in April 1975, the Satellite had turned into an afterthought, as maintaining a family was priority one.

From 1971 to 1978, the Satellite was stored in a dirt-floored barn owned by Jay’s parents. In 1978, the car was moved from the barn (as it had started to fall apart) to a new location a half-block from the Passon residence.

Youngest son Jamie recalls riding his tricycle around the car as a toddler. Several years later, during a family visit, he took notice of the Satellite sitting in the barn. He didn’t give the car much thought. Little did he know that things would change for him and his brother when they reached legal driving age.

In 1990, nearly 12 years after the Satellite had last moved, Jeff approached Jamie with an idea to resurrect their father’s car as a surprise for his upcoming 50th birthday. From June to October, they went over every detail of the car to make sure it looked just as it had when their father picked it up. The brothers were careful not to cross paths with their unsuspecting father while they worked on the car where it was stored, less than a block from the family home.

Bob Mathuse worked with Jay and was instrumental in helping the sons get technical information from their father on how to approach each of the car’s issues as they discovered them, without tipping him off. The process started out on the wrong foot when they could not open the driver-side door. Jay had hidden the keys, and asking for them would have spoiled the surprise. A coat hanger unlocked the door. Then the door panel was taken off, the lock cylinder removed, and a new pair of keys made. At the end of the day it cost Jamie the last $80 in his wallet.

“It took all the money I’d saved doing odd jobs,” he says. “Since it was for my father, I never gave it a second thought. I wasn’t going to let a locked door stand in our way.”

The locked door turned out to be the least of their worries. “The engine had seized while sitting idle in storage,” Jamie says. Feeling dejected and overwhelmed, they asked each other, “What do we do now?” Overwhelmed, but not defeated, they continued the evaluation of the car.

While going through its contents, the brothers came across an aerosol can of Yield penetrating lubricant in the trunk. (For some unknown reason their father stowed a can of the penetrant in the car.) After doing extensive research on how to free up a seized engine, they put a plan in place to awaken the locked-up 426 Street Wedge.

The Yield was sprayed into each of the eight spark plug holes and left to penetrate overnight. Then WD-40 was sprayed into each of the spark plug holes every day. After spraying the penetrant into each cylinder, Jamie would sit in the driver’s seat with the car in first gear and clutch engaged. Jeff would push him out of the garage, and once the car went over the edge of the gutter, Jamie would let out the clutch. Then he’d get out and they’d push the car back into the garage and repeat the process. They did this about 30 times per day for about a week before the engine finally broke free.

The boys could not have pulled the resurrection off without the help of Louie Mope, who worked alongside them.

In October 1990, the Passon family had a special unveiling for their father’s birthday. With the help of their mother, Joan, and friends Louie Mope and Bob Mathuse, they pulled off the event. Long before Overhaulin’ made it trendy, Jay was tricked into believing someone had broken into the storage area where his Satellite was stored and he needed to go there right away to see the damage. Panicked, Jay darted to the garage, mumbling his fears that the car he’d bought more than 25 years ago had vanished. He soon reached the building and anxiously opened the door, half-expecting to see a clearing of dust where his Satellite had been. Instead, he was shocked by the sight of his Satellite looking factory new again, this time with a red bow on the hood.

“I feel it was meant to be,” Jamie says, recalling the unveiling. “We finished the car literally the day before his birthday.”

The process of reviving the Satellite forever changed Jamie. The time spent researching and performing the actual hands-on work opened his eyes to a world he’d never dabbled in before. Prior to working on his father’s car, he had never been interested in them. After completing the resurrection, he walked away with a new career path.

In 1993, he launched Passon Performance, specializing in hand-built high-performance transmissions. His transmission of choice is the A-833 four-speed, which happens to be the same model originally installed in the Satellite. Jamie is now considered a top expert in the A-833 four-speed manual transmission.

During the photo shoot, Jamie got behind the wheel of his dad’s Satellite and positioned the car as needed. Later, I asked Jay and Jamie about the experience.

“It looked stunning and made me feel like it was 1964 again, and I was looking at it for the first time,” Jay said. “I could not believe it.”

Jamie might have put it best: “Whenever I sit in the car, the smell from the original interior is unlike any other. It’s kind of musty and intoxicating in a good way. Then to drive it during the photo shoot gave me butterflies. As the photo shoot progressed, my father and I stood back, stared at the car for a while, then looked at each other with big smiles on our faces. I said to myself, ‘That’ll be the last car to ever leave our family.’”

At a Glance

1965 Satellite Owned by: Jay Passon, Sugarloaf, PA Restored by: Unrestored original Engine: 426ci/365hp Street Wedge V-8 Transmission: A-833 4-speed manual Rearend: 8 3/4 with 3.23 gears and Sure Grip Interior: Black vinyl bucket seat Wheels: 14×5.5 steel Tires: P215/70R14 Laramie Premium Touring

Jay Passon ordered his 1965 Satellite in the fall of 1964 after learning he would have to wait a year to take delivery of a Shelby Cobra. Jay is now thoroughly convinced his second choice was the right one. He says, “Things happen for a reason.”

Jay with his Satellite soon after taking delivery in November 1964.

The 426ci Street Wedge was rated at 365 hp, breathing through a single four-barrel carb and a cast-iron intake manifold. With 465 lb-ft of torque spinning Bucron cheater slicks, the Wedge could send the Satellite through the quarter-mile in the low 13s.

The original factory interior, with black vinyl bucket seats and a Hurst shifter coming out of a center console, shows no signs of wear. It is a testament to how well Jay cared for the car.

While this isn’t exactly a day-two car, look close and you can see that Jay added a tachometer and an oil pressure gauge to keep tabs on the Wedge motor.

The Satellite’s paint, grille, and trim (including the grille’s tri-color insert) show no signs of wear or fading.

Jay and youngest son Jamie proudly pose with the Satellite.

The post Brothers Resurrect Their Father’s Beloved Wedge-Powered 1965 Plymouth Satellite as Surprise Birthday Present appeared first on Hot Rod Network.

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