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#jimin scenarios
muniimyg · 1 day
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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹ cheater!maknae line ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹ *nsfw*
series m.list // taglist closed.
🏷️ permanent taglist: @joonsjuice @pamzn @defzcl @maryy1300 @whoa-jo @taetaecatboy @jksusawife @un06 @firesighgirl @rrosiitas @butterymin @parkinglot-nights @musicjournalsjdb @kissyfacekoo
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chimcess · 3 days
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Waterlog || pjm (3) (teaser)
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Pairing: Jimin x Reader Other tags: Olympic Swimmer!Jimin, Ex Olympic Swimmer! Reader, Swim Coach!Reader Genre: Strangers to Friends to Lovers!AU, Coach!AU, Swimming!AU, HEAVY Angst, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, fluff, eventual smut, I'm so soft for these two it's crazy. Teaser wc: 391 Synopsis: After a car accident ends her athletic career, Y/N has slowly started rebuilding her life again as a high school swim coach. That’s until she gets a request from an old friend and finds herself back in the spotlight as the new coach of Olympic swimmer, Park Jimin. Warnings: toxic relationship (not reader and jimin), arguments, cheating (not reader and jimin), talks about previous child abuse, anxiety attack, strong language, crying, emotional abuse (not reader and jimin), mentions of depression and mental health, lots of angst in this one, finally making some progress though, age insecurity, mutual pining, lots of side character development in this one, they really are so sweet together, jimin just being the nicest boy in the world, so much PDA, physical touch is his love language 👀👀👀, more in the official posting...
Release date: April 6th, 2024 at 6pm EST
masterlist || playlist
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Jimin and I said our goodbyes and I promised the blue haired boy I would call him in the morning to set up another meet up. He called it a group date, something neither Jimin nor I disagreed with, but it did make me feel queasy. Depending on how our conversation goes, we may never spend time together outside of training. I felt like I was going to vomit.
“Let me drive?” Jimin murmured as we parted ways with the couple. 
I nodded, digging in my purse to find them. “Mind reader, I swear. Get out of my head, kid.”
He snickered, “Who says you weren’t in mine, granny”
The queasiness dissipated and I felt like I could breathe a little bit easier now. Being alone with Jimin had never felt this nerve wracking before, not even the first time we met, and it was hard to explain all of the thoughts and feelings going through my head. We were finally having the talk, but I had never imagined it going this way. Handing him the keys, I elbowed him in the ribs.
“Whoops,” I mocked. “You know me and my bad eyesight, kiddo.”
“Watch it,” He hissed, rubbing the spot. “Don’t want you breaking anything. You know you have frail bones.”
I laughed, “Don’t make me give you a knuckle sandwich, punk.”
Sliding into the passenger seat felt less daunting after the light hearted exchange. Still, my blood was pumping as Jimin clicked his seatbelt in place. I had no idea when the conversation would shift into murkier waters, but I needed to start thinking about what to say to him. 
Denying my feelings would only make things worse, and I did not think the younger man would believe me. In fact, he would be offended that I thought he was dumb enough to get bamboozled in the first place. Lying did not seem like the right call anyway. My feelings were not something to feel ashamed about, but they were very frightening. 
“When is later?”
I gasped, startled out of my thoughts. We had been driving for over ten minutes already. Time seemed to slip by when I was lost in my own head. Jimin apologized for scaring me but repeated the question once I reassured him that I was fine.
“Now,” I mumbled. “I guess later is now.”
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Taglist: @ownthesunshine @screamertannie @lovelytaes-blog @pernesianparapio @tae-with-some-suga @sumzysworld @chimmisbae
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Let me know if you want to be added/deleted from the taglist. -Lex
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peachypinkygloss · 1 year
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wicked obsession — pjm
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You don't like Jimin; you two are nothing alike. He's the campus' infamous fuck boy while you're studious, never stepping foot into parties. It's certainly not a good thing when he grows an obsession over you.
★ pairing: fuck boy!jimin x sub/fem!reader
☆ genre: university au, friends with benefits, smut
★ word count: 8.2k
☆ warnings: dub-con, non-con to a certain extent, take of pictures and videos without consent, threats toward the reader, hard dom jimin <3 (he's pretty soft in this one but still), he's evil and hot, reader's kind of a pervert too if we think about it long enough, pillow humping (f), masturbation (m), unprotected sex, no penetration because it's not a necessity 😌👍🏻, praising & brief degradation, dry humping, grinding, facial, cum eating, cunnilingus & fingering, squirting, jimin's a munch.
a.n.: this is a gift for myself since i crave jimin really, really badly. again, be mature and read the warnings! it's your job to avoid the content you don't like, not mine! 😉
playing: Filme moi
Please reblog! It helps me a lot and my fic get more visibility :)
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He's looking at you like a predator, narrowing his eyes and passing his index finger over his plump bottom lip. The only thing you can do is pretend to not see him staring intently at you and work harder on your assignment. If only you could do those things without anxiously glaring up at him and immediately breaking eye contact when he's already looking at you.
He doesn't even engage in the conversation with your group of friends and for some reason nobody has noticed how Jimin is ogling at you.
Why is he suddenly interested in you? Why!?
He knows how much you disapprove of his lifestyle. He doesn't care about his studies, he submits assignments days after the due date because why should he bother about the date when he'll get an A anyway. He puts no effort while you spend days on your homework and it angers you a lot.
Jimin is infamously known for his never ending libido, fucking everything that has two legs, two arms and a pussy. Infamously known to be a fuck boy simply because he breaks every women's heart without a care in the world. He may flash a smile while telling them they were a good hook up and that's it.
And that's why you're in big trouble because Park Jimin can't be obsessed with you.
As you finish typing your sentence on your keyboard, pressing on enter to change paragraphs, you look up. Mainly because you want to distract yourself a little bit from your work, but also because you can still feel his eyes boring into your skull.
Then, you see his black orbs looking straight in front of him where you're sitting while he's leaning against the chair's back, spreading his legs apart. You're surprisingly brave enough to hold eye contact this time, shivers running down your spine when he darts his tongue out to wet his lips.
What did you do for him to stare at you like you're a piece of meat?
It's like he's trying to send you a message, one that would offend you, make you raise your eyebrows in total astonishment and probably stop your heart from beating. Even though you can't decipher his message, you can understand it. Something nasty, so filthy that the devil himself wouldn't approve of.
He tilts his head downward and looks at you through hooded eyes. You have to swallow to not choke on your spit as his gaze destabilizes you so much you can't even process what's happening around you.
Jimin seems to like that, enjoying how weak you are, how you crumble apart just from holding eye contact with him. He smirks, following each one of your movements with his devious eyes.
You shift uncomfortably in your seat, trying to focus on your computer's screen, but you can't. He's distracting you and it really annoys you. Why can't he mind his own business?
"Class at ten, gonna go to my locker," one of your friends announces, Taehyung, while getting up from his seat.
Priya, also one of your friends, copies Taehyung's actions, standing up on her feet as well. "Oh, yes! I forgot my lip balm in my locker, I'm coming with you," she smiles at him, putting the straps of her tote bag over her right shoulder.
It's how the table you were hanging at slowly empties, and you let out the breath you were holding when Jimin decides to follow Seokjin and Jungkook to the cafeteria to buy some snacks before class. You're left alone at your request, telling Priya and the other girls that you're going to work extra minutes on your essay before joining them.
You wrote four pages already, only ten more and you'll be done. It's a lot and you're totally discouraged, but that's how university is. You quickly check the time on your phone and start packing your things in your backpack to attend your afternoon class that you share with some of your friends.
You take a seat in the middle beside Priya and you don't miss the glance Jimin sends you when he passes by, going to the back of the class with Jungkook. You're relieved he doesn't sit with you, even though it would have been unusual of him, but his sudden interest in you is unusual so you don't know what to expect anymore.
The professor explains the next project, which is a work that you'll have to do in a team of two people. The instructions are pretty simple, something you can do in less than two weeks. You expect to team up with Priya, after all you're the only girls of your group in this class and you two are close friends.
When the teacher is done with the instructions, he lets everyone form their teams. You do the work with Priya, but that is until Jimin makes his appearance.
"Hey, Pri'. You don't mind working with Kookie, right?" He asks your friend and she looks at him curiously, her eyebrows raising up on her face. You, on the other hand, are very confused, opening your mouth to protest until Priya responds with a joyful smile.
"Oh! No, not at all! You two are doing it together? How nice," she giggles, turning her head to look at you. She takes her books in her arms and walks to Jungkook without thinking twice about it.
Jimin steps aside to let her go, watching her sitting beside Jungkook with an undying smile plastered on her face. Your heart starts beating extremely fast as he takes place next to you, acting as if he just didn't decide to work with you without your consent.
"What are you doing! I never said I'd team up with you!" You whisper-shout at him, not wanting anyone to hear you complaining.
He checks the papers the teacher gave you earlier about the project's instructions with the evaluation grid, still pretending the situation is completely normal. "Well, I wanted to and you'll work better with me than with Priya, don't you think?" He turns his head in your direction and his expression is serious. He's genuinely asking you this question.
You shrug, frowning even more. "This wasn't for you to decide," you clench your fists on the table, so frustrated that Jimin thinks it's okay to make decisions for you. You're not even close friends, it doesn't make sense. "I prefer working alone if it's like that," you say, rising up from your seat, but the murderous glare he sends you petrifies you on the spot.
"Sit down," he commands severely and you do as he says, fearing him. He eyes you for a few seconds, making sure you won't try to leave him again. When you stay silent, he reports his attention on the project.
You don't say anything else, listening to Jimin's words distractedly, still baffled by what just happened. Students exit the class, others stay, and he offers to go work at the library.
There, you engage in the project with Jimin. You're pleasantly surprised to see that he's really focusing, sharing his ideas and opinions. You suppose he's only hardworking because the result doesn't solely rely on him. You know he's smart, but he prefers to spend his energy on partying instead of on his studies.
An hour passes and you're now working on your own, asking each other's opinion on things you wrote. You eventually forget how he typically forced you to work with him, but you still have this reluctance toward him, this feeling of repugnance.
Jimin isn't disgusting by any means, he's super hot and he knows he is. You might even be attracted to him, no need to deny it when he's so sexy he makes every girl's pussy mewl. But you know better than to act on your sexual desires, especially when they concern a guy as perverted as Jimin.
"Mmh," he seems to be thinking, but you feel like he already knows what he's going to say. "I forgot something at my dorm," he adds, not levelling his gaze from his sheet of paper.
You look at him, confused on why he doesn't explain further, as if it isn't important. "What is it?" You question him and that's when he raises his head, his gaze meeting yours.
His expression is painfully serious, and by now, you can easily recognize that it's a façade. You don't know what he's hiding, but you're sure of one thing; behind those beautiful almond shaped eyes, kindness doesn't reside there.
His eyes pierce through you, watching - observing your person. Jimin does this often, not answering until you feel uncomfortable under his intense stare. You have no clue on what he's trying to do, maybe see how vulnerable you are, how quickly you can break under the mischievous glint of his eyes.
"My charger."
You wouldn't know if Jimin is a liar because everything he says seems believable, the confidence he radiates just tells everyone how trustworthy this man is. But you look over the table where his phone lays down and the screen lights up as he just received a text. His battery is half full.
He takes his iPhone back into his hand, shoving it in his jeans' front pocket as he stands up from his chair. He tidies his stuff back into his pencil case then into his JanSport backpack, but he stops to look at you when you don't do the same thing. "Aren't you coming with me?" Again, his question is asked with a serious tone, as if following him to his dorm is the normal thing to do.
"I thought we'll just leave it there for today," you confess in a small voice, looking up at him from your seat. Your grip on your pencil tightens when his gaze flicks between your face and your breasts. You despise how he doesn't even hide it.
"No," he breathes out calmly, tilting his head to the side. "We'll continue it at my place, we can't stop now, we're doing so well," he smiles and like the unbothered person that he is, he pulls on your pen. It slips out of your hold and Jimin drops it off in your pencil case. "I really want to do this right this time."
And like that, the conversation is closed. You have no choice but to follow him somewhere you've never been before, somewhere you know he won't hold himself back.
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Jimin is guiding you with his soft voice, his hand placed on the small of your back, brushing his fingers adorned with rings across your naked body. You are sobbing out, feeling dirty, but the tingle between your legs is so good.
His lips are close to your ear, the corners of his mouth lifted to form a devilish smile. "Look at you, sweet thing... enjoying yourself, aren't you?" He whispers into your ear, doing slow circular motions with his hand on your back to soothe you.
You are humping his white pillow, rubbing your pussy frantically against the soft cotton material. Jimin is watching you closely, his smirk never leaving his plush lips. If someone is enjoying it the most, it's him. He likes seeing you losing your dignity bit by bit, and that, only because he asked you to.
The hair on the nape of your neck is wet and you have to tuck his pillow upwards regularly, this one falling down from your weak grip. Jimin doesn't bother to give you a hand, liking the way you are struggling to rut your hips against the soiled pillow, so eager to finally have your release.
For him, it's okay. Making you submit, ripping the last bit of confidence you had in you, forcing you to do things you find wrong. 'It's natural, after all', he said. 'Your body needs it, you can't keep denying your sexual desires for the rest of your life'. He is right about one point; your body needs it, but not you. It's where he fails to understand.
"See, I knew you would like it... I knew you'd like to rub that little pussy on a pillow," he purrs into your ear, smiling even more when a whine confirms his words. "Don't forget to look at the camera, sweetie," he pats your hair and you raise your head, frowning when you see yourself on his phone's screen.
It's placed on his desk chair in front of his bed, levelled on his chemistry books. When you think about it, the chair was already there, facing the bed, as you entered his room earlier. He had set up everything in advance and the thought itself makes you shudder so deeply that your members shake beside you.
"Jimin-!" You gasp out, the knot in your stomach tightening and tightening. You grind your hips harder and faster on the pillow, the same he's sleeping on each night, and feel yourself trembling in anticipation of your orgasm.
At the small call of his name, his face softens, his lips in an exaggerated pout. He takes pity on you, nothing more, just pity because you're so pathetic and weak trying to make yourself cum by humping his pillow.
"I know, baby," he coos, caressing your back, the cool silver of his rings brushing against your burning skin. His other hand gropes your breasts, strong veins pulsing out along his arm. He fumbles the flesh of your boobs, teasing your perky nipples with his palm. "Just let it go..."
You rub your clit against Jimin's pillow, twisting the fabric between your fingers, moving your hips frantically until your orgasm hits you. Jimin looks at you in awe, he has a wicked curiosity to watch you shake in pleasure - a pleasure you didn't ask for. He loves the tears that run down your chubby cheeks, loves that despite everything, you still like this.
You whine as you drive off your high, soiling the pillow with your juices and cum. Jimin lets out a groan, pulling the cushion away from your drenched cunt. "You did such a good job, baby," he praises you and passes an arm around your waist, bringing you against him. "What a sweet girl, so obedient, and just for me."
His free hand grips the back of your thigh and pulls it over his hip, making you fall underneath him on the mattress. You moan softly, feeling your pussy quivering, asking more than just a clitoral orgasm.
Jimin settles between your legs, pampering your neck in sloppy kisses, discovering your body with his pillowy and plump pink lips. He hesitates to mark you, to leave love bites all over your skin, but he refrains himself from it. Not yet.
Your hair is spread all over his bed, your beautiful tits displayed for him. He places a hand above your shoulder on the mattress to support his weight, the other holding your thigh that is locked behind his back. He lowers his head toward your breasts and positions himself better, bending his elbow beside your arm instead of leaving his hand next to your head.
His hot breath hits your nipples, making them even harder. He wraps his plushy lips around one, suckling on it avidly, leaving you panting heavily. Your face is hot, the entire room feels hot, and you think you might melt down under Jimin.
He licks your supple flesh, feeling the lines of your stretch marks under his pink muscle. He plays with the other that is left out by his mouth, pinching and pulling on your little bud. Quickly, your boobs are glistening in his spit, a beautiful sight he wants to reproduce every time he's with you.
"Jiminie..." You moan his name, arching your back as he bites gently on your nipple, flattening his tongue over it after as if to apologize for the pain. You're like a little doll for Jimin to play with, to love and care for.
He's acting awfully sweet as he rips the pureness out of you, sucking fervently on your nipples that you feel your stomach clench. It's a mix of discomfort and pleasure, making you feel weird, but also giving your core tingles you've never experienced before.
His crotch presses against your wet pussy and he slowly grinds his hips, making you aware of his hard cock trapped in his jeans. He detaches his lips from around your nipple and your breast bounces down to the side after. Jimin finds his spot in the crook of your neck again, still grinding his hips against yours.
He lets out a guttural moan from his throat and your pussy clenches around nothing but air. You have to admit that you don't really know what's happening, too drunk on the hormones both of your bodies are releasing. The rutting of Jimin's hips is pleasuring you, stimulating your clit perfectly, but that's not what you wanted, is it?
"Mmh, fuck," he curses, nuzzling your neck and giving you little kisses that want to be reassuring. "I'm so fucking horny, I want to fuck you so bad you have no idea," he presses his bulge harder on you, wanting to feel more friction, but his clothes are restraining him too much.
He looks you in the eye, catching every little moan that escapes your lips, accompanying his grunts and the noise of his bed creaking. He breathes onto your face as he painfully grinds his hips against yours. Maybe you would like him to penetrate you and fuck you until you can't feel any of your limbs, or until he ejaculates deep into you, stuffing you full of his seeds.
Maybe you would like it, maybe you would consider it.
He breaks eye contact as he sits back on his knees, glancing at your messy cunt, quivering helplessly. He grips the back of his white t-shirt with his two hands, pulling on the collar to pass it over his head. He throws it away on the floor where your clothes are as well, revealing to you his beautiful chest.
He has a tattoo on his rib cage, the word nevermind spelled in uppercase inked on his pale skin. His abs are well defined and his nipples are in a shade of dark pink. You can see the muscles of his biceps and he has a trail of hair under his belly button, going to his pelvis. Jimin looks dreamy, it's a shame that he has such a nasty reputation.
He unbuckles his belt, the clanking sound making your stomach flutter, pussy impatiently waiting for him and what he has to deliver. He doesn't stop looking at you as he unbuttons his jeans and unzips them while your eyes immediately lower to his crotch. Under these boxers, there's a huge bulge, and you imagine a thick cock, average length but unreal girth.
"Do you want to see my cock, sweetie?" He asks you in a gentle voice, a smile on his lips, but there is no mockery behind it. Though he's asking, he's not really waiting for your consent. He doesn't need it, not at the point where you are. "Aren't you a little bit curious?" His right hand comes to caress his hard on over his boxers, veiny hand gripping it and palming it.
You don't respond, mostly because you don't know what to say. You glimpse in the direction of the chair where his phone is settled down, seeing Jimin's body hovering over yours. He looks so imposing, dominating, and for some reason this sends a wave of heat between your legs.
You look back at him and you swallow, wondering if all of this talk is to make a show for the camera. You know he knows how much it disturbs you, but it seems like it doesn't bother him. It spurs him on even more, watching your face contort in discomfort and fear, wanting to bury yourself six feet under ground.
But he also knows that despite those negative feelings, you like this situation very, very much. Your body betrays your emotions; pussy leaking down your ass, wetness sticking to your inner thighs, nipples hard and pupils dilated.
He bites down on his bottom lip, passing his thumbs under the band of his briefs. Your heart accelerates, mind going crazy at the fact of seeing Jimin's dick just in front of you, centimetres away from your crotch.
"So excited to see me... You're going to like it, baby, believe me," he chuckles, lingering his eyes over your naked body, noticing the goosebumps running along your skin and making your hair stand up on your arms.
You almost whimper when he tucks the band of his boxers down, setting his cock free from its confines. It twitches twice before standing up proud against his pale stomach, pink tip glistening from pre-cum under the light of his bedroom.
You were right; Jimin is girthy, not super long and unshaved, but his head reaches a few inches under his belly button. He's really thick, and with what you've already seen in your life, you know his dick can't enter without forcing the entry a little bit. And this is not good, really not good. Not to mention the size of his balls that will surely leave bruises on your ass.
You're not sure if you like it.
You back away on the bed, trying to escape Jimin, but he's fast at gripping your thighs and pushing you back over to him. A laugh doesn't miss to leave his mouth, finding you silly for trying to run away from him when really, there's no way of getting away.
"It's okay, little thing. No need to fight..." His gaze lowers down to his dick where he takes it in his hand, angling it toward your pussy. "It's going to happen whether you want it or not," his last words end up in a whisper, too focused on swiping his tip through your folds to speak louder.
Your walls clench around nothing and you curse yourself for it, knowing that Jimin probably saw it. You whine when you feel him rubbing his mushroom head against your clit, his cock now covered in your wetness. He teases your hole, circling it slowly, collecting more of your arousal on his length.
Then, he pushes his head in slightly, testing how your pussy adjusts itself to the size of his thick cock. You wince as he pushes in over and over again, never putting more than the tip.
"Please, stop- Jimin, it's too much," you shake under him and throw your arms over his shoulders, this simple action making him actually reconsider what he's doing. "I can't take it..."
His eyes shift up to your face, not saying anything yet, observing if you're bluffing or not. If he's a good liar, then you're a bad one. He sighs, replacing his hands on each side of your head. "Don't worry," he promises, his lips brushing the side of your face, his breath tickling your burning cheek.
He glides his cock over your cunt, spreading your pussy lips apart and covering his erection in your juices. His girth stimulates your bud of nerves just the way you need it to feel the knot in your tummy tightening again. You're still sensitive, but it feels good. It's dirty, having your cum dripping down your hole, having Jimin's dick sliding up and down your drenched pussy, mixing his pre-cum to your own arousal.
Dirty, but great, oh, so great.
The zippers of his jeans sting the skin of your thighs as he grinds his cock over your clit non-stop, making you whine and moan, in pleasure or in pain, whatever it is you don't care anymore. It's slow and somehow sensual at first, Jimin moaning himself while driving his erection through your folds.
He gives you small kisses all over your face and while he does so, you can't believe that this is the same man that you used to say you hated so much. Each kiss is warm and soft, on your cheekbones, on your forehead or on the corner of your mouth, you love them all. You could forget about his phone filming your intercourse, you could forget about how he forced you to team up with you, you could forget about everything just by the delicate touch of his plump lips on your skin.
Each roll of his hips seems painful with the way he hisses and twists the bedsheets between his fists, very weak strings holding him back from fucking his cock into your pussy. You don't understand why he respects your boundaries now, but you won't complain.
"Mmh, a-ah, fuck..." You can't get over the fact how his voice sounds so angelic, so pure, and yet, he's doing that to you. Even his deepest moans are honeyed, butterflies flapping their wings in your belly as he growls into your ear.
He fastens the cadence of his hips before stopping, as if he'd have broken down to his real urges if he had continued.
"I'm sorry, sweetie, but I'll have to cum on your face," he informs you, his wet cock leaving your pussy. "And I want some souvenirs..." He smiles deviously, getting up on his knees to stand over your chest.
You watch him pump himself lazily, his cock hovering over your face, mouth hanging open to catch your breath. He frowns and lets out a guttural moan, looking at your poor figure laying helplessly under him. He wets his lips and directs the tip of his cock to your mouth. You close it and he takes the opportunity to pass his head over your lips, smearing your own cum on them.
He tilts his head to the side, smiling as he glances at you with such a sick curiosity. "Do you like tasting yourself on my cock, baby? Hmm?" His eyes glint in mischievousness, so turned on to use you how he pleases, how he always wanted it. "Tastes good, doesn't it? Couldn't get enough even if you wanted to..." It doesn't have much of a flavour, you think, but Jimin seems to really like it.
He decides to jerk himself off just above your face and you clench your thighs, watching in awe how his hand grips tightly his erect penis and how his palm runs up and down smoothly around it. There's something about not being able to move, trapped under Jimin, that has your clit throbbing furiously.
Maybe it's something about him pleasuring himself shamelessly, spurts of your arousal splashing around as he fucks his fist, or something about his soft but deep moans he lets out from time to time, staring at you intently as you're the one making him so horny right now.
He passes a hand through his black hair, his bangs wet from his sweat. He twists his wrist, focusing on his swollen tip before stroking his whole length. "Ah, shit," he sounds really sensitive, sucking air through his teeth. "Gonna cum," he announces rapidly, fastening the pace of his palm.
The veins on his arm are producing, and you're amazed at how many there are. His rings shine as the light makes them glint each time he comes up to his mushroom head.
You open your mouth by instinct, flattening your tongue on your chin, which makes Jimin groans angrily. "Aah, what a good fucking slut," he angles his dick toward your face, long strands of white cum landing on your face as he moans out loudly. "Oh, God..." He mutters under his breath, spilling his creamy cum across your face.
It doesn't go as planned, his seeds leak down on your nose and forehead in a long trail rather than on your tongue and lips. You close one eye because some of his cum drips down on it, keeping the other open. He fucks himself dry, little white beads spilling out of his tip to fall on your cheeks.
"Mmh, fuck, so pretty..." Jimin's eyes linger on your face, stroking himself distractedly as his cock softens in his hand. You retract your tongue back in your mouth, watching him pick up his phone from the chair.
He stops the recording and goes to take a photo vertically, cupping your chin to make you face the camera correctly. He smiles behind his phone, thumb hovering over the button. You hear the capturing sound two times before he's starting another recording.
He lets go of your chin to collect his cum on his fingers that was dripping down to your eye, bringing his digits to your lips. You can then open your eyelid, parting your lips slightly for him to insert his index and middle finger in. You lick them clean, tasting him on your tongue. It's salty, but nothing really repulsive as you thought it would be.
He pulls out of your mouth, giving your cheek a slight slap. You feel the wetness of your saliva on it. Jimin throws his phone away on his bed when he's finished with the video, stuffing himself back into his jeans. He gets up from you and helps you wipe the remains of his cum on your face.
You don't move until he dresses you in one of his t-shirts, your body completely drowned in it. You go pee and when you get out of the bathroom, he envelops you in his strong arms, bringing you back to bed.
He hugs you tightly against his naked chest, laying his head on your chest in a really intimate manner. "You won't tell anyone? Please," you whisper and he elevates his head from you, looking at you with a serious expression.
He answers nothing, instead he lays on his side and pulls you closer. He strokes your hair gently as you listen to his heartbeat, mind empty. You fall asleep eventually, only to wake up the next day, leaving in a hurry to your own dorm to prepare yourself for another day of university.
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You are sitting on a bench in the university's baseball field, doing homework once again. Jimin is always glancing at you from where he is on the field, throwing the ball at Taehyung for him to hit with the bat he's holding.
Taehyung and Jungkook are changing places regularly, one or the other being the hitter. Seokjin is monitoring the two youngest, giving them tips or correcting the way they are positioned since he's the most experienced, being the baseball team's captain.
Priya is beside you, glued to her phone, probably texting Namjoon, the guy she's seeing at the moment. A gym addict, you remember her telling you and also apparently Seokjin's good friend from another campus.
Even though you're focused on your work, you still feel Jimin's eyes on you and it scares you to think that he might have told everyone about you two. He didn't because no one has addressed it, but there's a doubt, a little voice in your head telling you that he didn't respect your wish to keep it a secret.
If your friends know it, your parents, even the whole school... you have no idea how you will manage it. It doesn't seem like much of a big deal, but you just don't want this kind of information to follow you for life. Jimin isn't the type of guy you want to be associated with.
Despite the sweet nicknames he calls you, his devilish smile that makes butterflies erupt in your tummy, his insanely pretty face, his soft voice that makes you shiver, his plump pink lips browsing your skin, his beautiful hands gripping your thighs, his hot cum painting your face, how he's so gentle but has the evilest intentions at the same time.
Despite all of those things, you don't want him. You really don't. But he does.
The time passes as the boys' laughters fill the air, the positions changing; Priya talking with Taehyung, Seokjin and Jungkook bickering, Jimin making fun of them and glancing your way when his attention drifts off of his friends.
You sigh when you have to get back to your dorm by yourself, your unfaithful friend too swamped by a boy to realize you're still there. You collect your things, laptop in its cushioned case and notes back into its assigned binder.
You think you can sneak out of the baseball field without anyone noticing, but you're so wrong to even assume he doesn't have his eyes set on you.
Outside the field, you stop walking when a familiar voice calls you. "Where are you going?" You turn around, only to be met with, evidently, Jimin.
You shrug, glimpsing behind you where the university's building is. "To the dorms..." You answer, not too sure why you sound hesitant. It's not like you need his permission to go back to your room. It's late at night anyway, and you don't want to get bit by mosquitoes.
He closes the distance between you two, stepping ever so slowly, as if to tease you, to chase you. No need to go faster, he knows you'll stay there, frozen on the spot.
"You can go back with the others," you say, frowning as you want him to leave you alone. You don't voice this wish, though and you're lucky you don't because he doesn't like being rejected, especially by you.
His gaze darkens as he narrows his eyes at you and you're scared for a moment before the corner of his mouth lifts up into a smirk. "No, I'm coming with you," he decides and you know this isn't a proposition, it's a statement.
But you're not okay with this. So you back away slightly, still facing him, breath quickening. He notices your reluctance and he frowns, a scowl on his face. You keep moving back and he keeps moving forward, that is until you have enough and run in the university's direction.
Your sudden move takes Jimin by surprise and you hear him calling your name, clearly annoyed with you. He asks himself if he should run after you because if he does people will see him and that's not something he wants. But he knows you're going to the dorms, so he just has to arrive there before you do.
You soon make your way to the university residence building, relieved Jimin didn't follow you. You thought he would have, but it seems like he didn't want to bother running after you. You nonetheless look behind you from time to time, verifying in case he did in fact follow you, but you don't see him.
A little voice tells you how unfortunate it is that he didn't chase after you. Is it because he doesn't like you anymore? For some twisted reason, this idea disappoints you. Did he realize you weren't as interesting as he thought you would be or does he think you were shitty in bed? That would be quite humiliating and sad.
You liked the attention he gave you.
When you step into the corridor your room is located in, your eyes widen and your heart almost explodes as you see Jimin casually waiting in front of your door. You didn't expect him to be there, how did he even enter without you noticing?
You feel like a poor little bunny who has nowhere to go, damned to be eaten alive by the big, bad wolf slowly approaching its prey. But the difference between you and the bunny is that you're secretly turned on to be tracked down by Jimin.
He pushes himself off the wall he was leaning on when he perceives you walking in. His smile doesn't leave his beautiful plump lips, his mischievous eyes scanning your little body from head to toe.
As he reaches you, you finally come out of your torpor. "Jimin," you warn him and he stops, inches away from you. "I'm not... doing this. I don't want to."
He doesn't look convinced at all. Who are you trying to fool now, you or him? It's better not to be him because he's not the kind to give up on something he really wants.
He tilts his head, looking at you curiously, the expression he does when something intrigues him. "Don't act like this now, sweetie," he purrs, closing the gap between you two. Your breath is caught in your throat, avoiding his gaze at all cost. You're trapped between him and the wall. "You wouldn't like to have your pretty body leaked, hm, baby? It wouldn't really be a secret anymore..."
He touches your cheek with his hand, caressing the side of your face with his index finger. You shudder, pressing your books tightly against your chest. "W-What? I thought- I thought..." You stutter out, heart thumping against your rib cage.
"It doesn't matter what you thought, sweet thing." His words come out husky, his hot breath fanning across your face, making goosebumps run all over your skin. "It's okay if you don't want to, but you have to know that there'll be consequences," he almost sings this threat to you as he sounds so angelic and you're more and more scared by him. Scared in a way that makes your clit throb.
He cages you between the wall and him, pressing his body against yours feverishly til it makes him ill. Your two breaths intertwine, mingling together to create a compact atmosphere where it's hard for you to even think straight.
"The videos.... oh, and that pic," he reminds you and the events are quick at coming back into your mind. "Are all saved in my phone, only for me to look at... and believe me, I must have replayed them at least ten times, if not more," he informs you. "And, God, I was so hard just looking at you, baby."
You can't help but clench your thighs, imagining him with his phone in one hand, his cock in the other.
"Jimin," you breathe out quietly, coming out like a whisper, the sound of your voice making him focus on you. He glances down at your face, watching your lips parting to pronounce your next word. "Stop..."
Though he might have been soft before, you rejecting him again when you're clearly turned on makes him mad. He grabs your wrist and you gasp when he pulls you with him, bringing you to his room instead of yours.
You try to free yourself from his grip, but you fail miserably, almost tripping over your feet. Some people look at you weirdly, no one really stops to ask what's going on. He drags you to his door and opens it hurriedly, closing it when you're both inside.
He takes your books and your backpack away from you, putting them on the ground. You observe him in awe, you're completely in shock. He removes his baseball jacket swiftly as well as his shoes and pushes you on his bed. Your body bounces back on the mattress, Jimin crawling up to you like a hungry feline.
Heat floods through your abdomen to your core, setting your whole body on fire while your panties are getting wet as he's about to do whatever he wants to you. You squirm under him, but not because you want to get away - your body is aching to be touched, to be pleasured.
Face to face, he presses his body against yours until there's no gap separating you. He is insistent and you feel like suffocating, but you'll survive, very much so. Jimin is giving you his breath and you're giving him yours.
His t-shirt hangs loosely on him, the ends of the sleeves stopping just over his elbows. Some kisses are placed on your cheeks, on your lips, on your neck. It tingles sweetly, your stomach doing a flip, butterflies partying in your belly, pussy mewling. You feel everything at once, and intensively.
You don't protest when he removes your crop top, letting your breasts out, nipples hardening from the cold air hitting them. He plays with them for a brief moment, pinching and pulling on the little buds, before lowering down on you. Your mouth hangs open, not expecting him to do that to you.
He pulls your shoes off your feet, letting them fall on the floor beside his bed. He eyes your little white socks, deciding it'd be better if you keep them on. Due to your position and the fact that you're wearing a skirt, Jimin can see your cotton panties from his point of view. He smirks, looking at the wet patch over your cunt.
He passes an arm under your back, pulling the zipper of your skirt down and he rips the material off of you. You gasp at his brutality, but you don't think about it furthermore as he hooks his fingers under the band of your underwear, sliding it down your legs despite your little whines of embarrassment.
Your femininity is now very exposed to his insatiable eyes, gazing at it like a hungry man. Settled between your legs, he passes them over his shoulders, holding the back of your thighs so they stay open for him.
"Hmm, always so pretty... And it's all for me," he licks his lips, pink tongue peeking through them. He pushes your thighs up against your chest so he has a better access to your cunt, already glistening in your arousal. Only your feet are touching his shoulders, now. You wish for a moment that he was shirtless, and you're too shy to ask him to remove his t-shirt.
Your meaty thighs are squished over your lower stomach and you won't lie that the position is hard to keep. You're not that flexible, and surely not athletic, unlike Jimin. You whimper a little bit, feeling his breath on your wet pussy, making you shiver.
"Hold your legs up for me, sweetie," he softly commands, giving you an appreciative smile when you sneak your hands under your knees. "Good girl," he praises and you can feel your clit pulsating at how badly his words affect you.
He places his arms around your thighs and takes a hold of your hips. The cool metal of his rings brushes against your skin and you notice the chain around his neck dangling, the pendant bumping into the bed covers.
Jimin finally focuses on your cunt and when he blows on it, you can't hold in your moan. He's happy to hear your reactions, loving how you're so sensitive, how your puffy clit begs him to suck on it. But the first thing he does is kiss your inner thighs delicately while caressing your body along your curves with his veiny hands.
Then, his lips get closer to your warmth, impatiently waiting for him. He wraps his lips around your bud of nerves and suckles on it, eliciting quiet moans from you. It's gentle and you've never felt better, your fingers are in no comparison to his skillful mouth.
He sucks a bit more and your face contorts in pleasure. You try to glance at Jimin, but your position only allows you to see a fluffy head of black hair buried between your legs. The view is so filthy and you become drunk off his mouth, loving what's happening, barely remembering that he threatened you to leak the videos of you two having sex.
The sucks turn into licks, his wet muscle sliding from your hole up to your swollen clit, parting your pussy lips apart in the process. He teases your entrance with the tip of his tongue, circling around it, just dipping in slightly enough to make you needy.
Before you can ask for more, he flicks his tongue on your sensitive bud, moving his muscle from side to side rapidly. You moan out, feeling delicious tingles in the pit of your stomach. You grip your thighs harder, pussy clenching and begging to be fucked by Jimin's huge dick with such eagerness.
"Oh, my God, Jimin!" Your legs start to shake and his tongue gives you an orgasm, arching your back as he keeps stimulating your clit until you're off your high.
You sense him collecting your cream with his tongue, dipping into your folds. You let go of your thighs, letting them fall by your sides. You try to catch your breath as Jimin is still nuzzled in your pussy as if he's licking the plate after eating his meal, leaving nothing behind.
"Please, s-stop..." You cry out, being overstimulated by him. You attempt to push his head away, but he doesn't nudge a bit. "It's too much."
He looks up at you, leaning on his elbows. "Stop complaining or I'll fuck this pussy with my cock without feeling any pity," he warns you and you give up, but you still whine weakly.
When you think he's finished, he penetrates you with two fingers at once, sliding in so easily with how wet you are. The sudden intrusion makes you gasp, your own fingers are certainly not as big as Jimin's. They might be small for a man, but in no way that means they're the same size as yours.
"Shh, my sweet baby, it's okay. Relax, you're so tense..." He says, face hovering over your cunt as he slowly pumps his digits into you. He keeps them straight the first few strokes, but he starts to scissor your insides as well. You feel your pussy expanding around his fingers, it's a really unfamiliar sensation, but since it's Jimin, you slowly chill down.
He hooks his fingers perfectly inside of you, brushing against your sweet spot. The overstimulation is replaced by this new pleasure, much more intense and significant than the other. He expertly moves his two digits at a regular pace, holding your thigh up with his free hand.
Your juices are dripping down your ass, the feeling kind of uncomfortable, but Jimin fingering you makes you forget about everything around you except for him.
His palm is facing up, colliding with your clit each time he's knuckles deep into your messy cunt. He hums pleasantly when he feels you clench around him, seeing that you're having a good time. He lowers his head again and you immediately grasp his hair in your fist when he nips at your sensitive clit.
He flattens his palm since his chin is in the way and instead pets your spot inside of you with the pads of his fingers. It's sweet and almost magical. You feel like he's munching on your pussy, opening and closing his mouth over your clit, tongue viciously licking the little bud. It's slow, it's perfect, it's everything your body needs. That you need.
You let out soft moans, pulling on his black locks, completely in love with his mouth until it leaves you again. You would have complained, despite his warning of earlier, but he literally finger fucks you and it cuts you off instantly from saying anything.
He doesn't miss a beat, constantly rubbing your magic spot, making you lift your back from the mattress. You twist the bedsheets between your fingers, a fire in your belly, growing more and more with Jimin's ministrations.
"What the-!" You never say the end of your sentence, frowning and closing your eyes as you let the pleasure of another orgasm take over you. Jimin never stops, gaze shifting between your face and your pussy regularly to catch your reactions. "Jimin, wha-what's... Oh, God!" You scream, and everything happens so fast.
He pumps his fingers in and a clear liquid floods out of your cunt, in droplets first, but then bigger. You don't see what's happening, but an intense pleasure rips through you and your body is shaking like a leaf.
"Oh, fuck," you hear Jimin cursing, almost moaning after. His rhythm slows down, more fluid coming out. "You're such a girl good, shit, it's so fucking hot," he growls and stops his movements, hand cupping your cunt, patting it gently.
There's a wet puddle under your ass and you blink several times, coming back to Earth, feeling totally knocked out. "Jiminie..." You whine out, looking down at him.
The front of his t-shirt is soaked and some droplets fall from his chin. Immediately, you feel your cheeks heating up, so embarrassed from what you did. You squirted all over him to the point of wetting his clothes. But he looks nowhere disgusted, rather turned on than anything else.
He laughs, though it's not to mock you at all. He's just so happy, so fucking in love.
"I'm sorry..." You apologize shyly, but Jimin shakes his head, crawling back up to you.
"No, baby, no..." He coos, pampering your cheeks and forehead in feathery kisses. "There's nothing to be sorry for. It felt good, am I right?" He asks and you nod, feeling particularly ashamed. "Of course it was, I should have filmed it... Well, maybe next time," he sighs contentedly, smiling adorably.
He kisses you on the lips and after that intense orgasm, you start to feel guilty. Embarrassed, ashamed. Not because you stained his t-shirt, but because you liked it. A lot.
It makes you want to repeat it solely with Jimin. Forever and ever. But you can't, not again, not after you told yourself you wouldn't.
For Jimin, it was everything he's ever wanted in his life. You and him in the same bed, having sex, enjoying yourselves. It couldn't be better, really. He'll do anything it takes to keep you with him and believe him when he tells you there's going to be a next time.
Nothing will stop him from having what he wants, not even you.
4K notes · View notes
hoseokshobagi · 2 months
Text
† Reborn in Sin ⸸ | Sneak peak | PJM
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† Reborn in Sin ⸸ sneak peak
✞PAIRING: demon!jimin x fem!reader
✞ 【SUMMARY】: for years jimin was your constant and loyal companion in the church, a shining example of humility and compassion. but when he was tragically taken from the world before he could experience life, his heart was filled with anger and resentment. and so, in a moment of weakness, he struck a deal with the devil, trading his soul for a second chance at life. but when he returned, he was no longer your kind and devoted boy you once knew.
✞ 『GENRE』: dark ✟ supernatural ✟ fantasy ✟ angst ✟ smut
✞ RATING: 18+ / minors do not interact
✞ WORD COUNT: loading...
✞ [WARNINGS/TAGS] : dead dove, dark, death, manipulation, corruption (kink?), church & religion, blasphemy & desecration, [oral(m) - not with reader, headpusher jimin, face fucking, spit play], dirty talk, humiliation, degradation, dubcon, public fingering, exhibitionism, sexual "nightmares" & hallucinations, mind games, jimin is the worst & the BIGGEST warning!!!!, oral(f), cunt drunk jimin, unprotected sex, rough sex, orgasm denial, edging, overstimulation, unrealistic amount of cum lmao, cum play, betrayal, mind break
✞ NOTE: hi beautiful people!!! this story was written for the @btsfests writing fest. actually this is the first time i publish my writing and omg ahcbdjs i'm so nervous while writing this note. i always wrote for myself and my closest friends but thanks to bts fests and their never ending encouraging words i decided to show off my writing. this little part is the reason why i started writing this whole story and i hope you'll like it just as much as i enjoyed writing every word. :] this demon jimin is the most cunty & selfish character i've written so far so yall better prepare yourselves ajfnsjxnsjs
english is not my native language, but despite that i'll write and communicate in english. please if you see an error in my writing or grammar lmk!! <3
my dearest beta read: @liveyun 🐢♡
COMING SOON
❗this is the darkest fic i've ever written so please read all the warnings before reading❗
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The delicate chimes of the church bell echoed softly through the cavernous rafters, casting an unsettling shadow over Jimin’s mind. Like ghostly whispers emanating from the very walls and pillars of the church, the sounds seemed to taunt him. Whispering to him that he no longer belonged in this sacred space.  
He couldn’t believe how he used to devour Father Seokjin’s every word, eagerly drinking up his sermons like it was the finest wine he ever tasted. In this very church, where he had spent countless hours sitting in the pews, Jimin felt like a stranger in the world he once called home.   
He looked to his left and gazed upon the sweet, delicate flower — the very reason why he was there. Innocence shining in your eyes, your eyelashes fluttered like the softest butterfly wings. Sitting next to him with hands clasped tightly together in your lap, you looked as pure as new snow, listening to the mass.  
Oh, how much he forced himself to resist the urge to reach out and ruin you right then and there. To feel the delicate petals of your innocence as they crumpled beneath his fingers. But he was going to do so slowly, savoring every moment of your fall from grace.   
So, he grit his teeth and forced himself to endure the priest’s words and the choir’s music, at least, for a while.   
Despite his best efforts, this place was as dull and lifeless as the stones that made up its walls. He spent half of his life trapped within these confines, he knew every creak of the floorboards, every flicker of light, every word and phrase of the Bible that was engraved in his mind, the product of countless wasted years.  
Jimin raised a hand to his face, tracing each perfect curve of his newly manicured nails, scrutinizing them from every angle. He raised an eyebrow in anticipation, marveling at Hoseok’s handiwork.  
He couldn’t wait to make another deal with the bastard later.  
You noticed his attention was drifting and Jimin’s reverie was broken by a gentle tap on his shoulder, causing his thoughts to come crashing down around him like a house of cards. He turned to see your confused eyes peering up at him, your delicate lips murmuring a soft “pray”.   
He couldn’t help but mentally roll his eyes. Oh, you were so annoying. He was going to make you pay for all the stress and frustration that he had to go through and endure because of you.   
Jimin lowered his head and with a deep breath, closed his eyes, pretending as if he was lost in prayer, his mind far from it. Wandering anywhere but there.  
As you finally turned back to offer your own prayers, he couldn’t resist and raised his eyes, glancing back at you.  
And he was so fucked.   
You were a sight to behold, more divine than the sacred paintings that adorned the walls of this church.  
As your eyes drifted shut, your lashes like feathers of a sleeping bird, delicately brushed the curves of your eyes. The soft radiance of the lights danced upon your face, creating a tender veil of shadows that caressed your skin.   
Your lips moved in silent devotion as you murmured in such sincerity, clutching the Holy Book tightly in your hands. And he swears, he could feel his dick twitch just at the sight.   
You were so breakable, so vulnerable and so fucking beautiful.   
Yeah, he was so fucked. So lost in you.   
Park’s burning desires had been building to a crescendo in the last few days, a boiling point that seemed to threaten to engulf him whole. He felt like his longing for you was an aching fire that was on the verge of exploding. The mere sight of you at the church was a powerful trigger to him, fanning the flames for this fire.   
And he thought it was ridiculous.   
He couldn’t believe how he couldn’t control himself, his body yearning for yours, needing to stain the purity of your grace, to spread his sin all around your soul. To corrupt the sacredness of who you were with the foulness of who he had become.  
He glanced around and took in the sights and sounds of the church, noticing that everyone was enraptured by the mass. Their focus was solely on the priest at the cathedral, their attention directed nowhere else.   
With a subtle smirk playing at the corners of his mouth, he slipped closer to you and your sweet scent filled his nostrils; making him feel intoxicated. He knew exactly what he had to do; a little play won’t hurt anyone.  
Jimin’s touch was like a gentle caress of a summer breeze, soft and tender, caressing your skin like the lightest of kisses. Your eyes flicked open, searching for the source of such unexpected warmth.   
And there he was, with his legs crossed, - his gaze fixed on you with such intensity that always made your cheeks warm for some reason – one arm resting comfortably on his elbow on the church pew, the other continuing to idly play with the soft fabric of your long skirt.   
You never wore anything revealing; preferring modesty over anything else, however this time, you felt utterly exposed as his eyes roamed over your form like that. Jimin always enjoyed this, stripping away your layers one by one, revealing the true you that lay beneath.  
Slowly he drew near, his aura spreading like a thick mist, wrapping around you. The scent of his cologne swirled around as his body pressed against yours, his knee gently nudging yours. His warm breath brushed against your cheeks, like the caress of a dead night.   
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing. Keep praying." You looked at his hand, still playing with your skirt, unsure of what to say. Jimin’s voice was calm and soft, yet, there was something about his dark eyes that made you feel uneasy. Like he was biding his time, planning his next move.   
It clearly made you uncomfortable, but you were too naive to say anything, too afraid to speak your mind, not to mention that you were sure Jimin would never do anything wrong, so you turned back again and closed your eyes to pray.   
But what you didn’t know was that you were already entangled by the snake’s coils; Jimin waited for the moment when you would break. He was so curious, so eager to see just how far you would go, how much you would endure before you finally stepped up and told him to stop.  
Would you wrench his hand away? Would you yell at him? Would you make a scene in the middle of the church? He knew you wouldn’t, knew you were just too gentle and too timid to disrespect your favorite little church.   
And so, he kept pushing, pushing your boundaries and invading your personal space, inch by inch, leaving a trail of gooseflesh in the wake of his touch.  
You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, trying desperately to break free from his touch, but he only tightened his grip, making your heart race with a mixture of fear and uncertainty.  
"Jimin, can you please stop?" Oh, that was it. Your question was hardly above a whisper, as though afraid of you would be heard by those around you. The snake’s grip finally ensnared his delicate, little flower and he had no intention of stopping.  
„Keep it down. You wouldn’t wanna disturb the praying souls now, would you?”   
A devilish smirk played on his lips, eyes like black holes bearing down at you. His voice was like honey dripping from his lips; so soft and alluring. A stark contrast to the real meaning behind his words and actions. He continued to run his hand up your thigh, pushing your long skirt higher and higher until it was bunched around your waist.  
"Jimin, st—" His other hand slithered around from the back of your neck, forcefully covering your mouth, silencing any words that wanted to escape your lips. Whatever you tried to say it came out muffled by his hand, leaving you feeling panicked and completely helpless.   
You grasped at the material like a lifeline, desperate to pull it back down, but Jimin’s arm was like a steel barricade, preventing you from covering yourself. You felt trapped, your body burning with the shame of exposure. 
 "I said keep your mouth shut. We don’t want others to see you like this, do we?"
Your breath caught in your throat, unable to escape as the fear of being discovered and shamed in front of everyone took over. All you could do was fix your gaze on Jimin’s intense, brooding eyes, silently pleading for mercy with your own desperate ones. Ah, so pretty for him.  
As you gazed into the depths of his dark eyes, the windows to his no longer existing a soul, you revealed a darkness that engulfed you, and you knew there was no escape.  
You were at his mercy, and he had none. 
Jimin’s pupils dilated at the sight, your skin was soft and flawless, causing a shiver to run down his spine as he gently touched you. The delicate fabric of your white panties teased him, giving him just a glimpse of what was hidden underneath.   
With a playful twinkle in his eyes, he lazily played with the tiny, little, pink bow adorning the center of your panties. His actions were a clear taunt, a display of the control he had over you and your vulnerabilities.  
It was clear you wanted to push him away, to scold him, yell at him, but he knew the fear of causing a scene in church held you back. You tried to glance around nervously, hoping no one would notice what was happening.   
The world seemed to come to a standstill, the only thing that existed was the fast, thumping beat of your heart as Jimin’s hand slithered closer and closer to the place where it had no business being. You felt trapped, your body frozen, unable to break free as if you were held captive by a coiled serpent;  its grip tightening with each struggle. The sound of your unsteady breaths filled the air, the only thing grounding you in reality, that, and the heat from his touch, because this serpent was crafted from the finest satin. 
„Shh, baby, it’s okay. It’s okay, keep praying so God won’t mind, yeah?”   
His words made you paralyzed, like a spell, breaking you down. Words like those should never have left the lips of the kind and caring Jimin that you thought you knew. Your mind was reeling with shock and pain, struggling to make sense of how someone you had trusted completely could suddenly become a stranger. Jimin’s actions were like a knife to your heart, a stab that pierced through the trust you had placed in him.   
With the grace of a feather dancing on skin, Jimin traced his fingers over your clothed clit, making you tremble beneath his touch. A soft gasp escaped your lips, your eyes widening as you felt the weight of the moment sinking in.  
And he chuckled softly, a low rumble that only you could hear, taking your response as a cue, he increased the pressure. His skilled fingers now applied a firm yet tender touch, coaxing your body to new heights of pleasure, and your body tingled in response, betraying you by a throbbing ache that grew stronger with every touch.  
As the ripples of pleasure swirled within you, you tried to pull back, to resist the sin that was happening in the very place where you sought solace and salvation. The guilt gnawed at your soul, the snake’s venom that seeped into every crevice, tainting the flower’s beauty.   
And yet, Jimin reveled in your pain, basking in the darkness of your suffering as he watched the guilt consume you whole. The venom of your remorse was a feast for his senses; the holy wine, the sweetest elixir to be savored with every devious sip.  
"Look, what do we have in here." He pressed his thumb against the dark spot on your panties, causing you to shiver. For him, the sensations of your wetness seeping through the fabric was like an euphoric rush, the sweet nectar of his delicate flower, intoxicating and irresistible.  
Heat spread across your cheeks, horror and shame washing over you at his words, you shook your head, tried to move, tried to tell him to stop, but you found yourself lost in his eyes, searching for any sign of the person you once knew. But all you saw was darkness, a void that seemed to swallow you whole.  
"Deny it if you want, baby, but aren’t you a nasty girl? You’re fucking soaking."
And it was true. Your body felt like it was betraying you, and you were mortified. He ignited a fire within you that you couldn’t deny. A soft cry slipped from your lips, but you couldn’t bear to face him, knowing that you were powerless in his grasp.  
You were unable to believe what was happening. As someone who had always followed the Catholic faith and held its teachings in high regard, there you were, in this sacred place, allowing something so forbidden to take place.  
But as his fingers slipped under the fabric of your panties, your mind went blank. The back of Jimin’s hand clung to your sticky panties as his fingers found their way down to your folds, the feeling making him shiver. 
„Fuck— you’re so wet, can’t wait to feel you around me.”   
You squeezed your lips together under Jimin’s hand to keep from making any noise, your eyes squeezed shut, tears threatened to spill down your cheeks as his wet fingers continued to rub and spread your folds apart, smearing your sticky arousal all over your cunt.  
„Shh, this won’t make you a sinner baby, it’s okay. You won’t mind just one finger inside, yeah?” His middle finger probed at your entrance, teasing it, making it wetter still, as he slowly pushed in.  
„Y-yeah baby— just one finger?” He teased and removed his finger, making you clench around thin air, and Jimin swears, the feeling made him twitch inside his pants. Teasing you – or himself, it didn’t matter anymore – he plunged back in, tauntingly slow. 
Jimin’s eyes rolled to the back of his skull, his hard dick pressing firmly against his pants, yearning for release. To him this is how true Paradise felt like, the feeling of your silk walls wrapped around his digit.   
He was about to lose it. 
He bottomed his finger out inside you, knuckle deep, until his small 13 tattoo on his wrist met with your lower abdomen. 
But he craved more. Fuck, how much he wanted to slam you against the pew and spread your thighs wide open, stretching your pretty little pussy right out with his dick. And who could blame him with the way your cunt gripped on his one single digit like that, dripping wet and sinfully warm. 
But he couldn’t— not now. And it made him crazy. 
You sank into the pew, your body trembling as he started to move his finger, his other hand still covering your mouth to keep you quiet. Every part of you was on fire, your mind and body in a constant battle between desire and shame. You were supposed to stop him, to push him away, but all you could manage was tremble and it made your eyes water. 
It was a mixture of remorse and the burning desire pounding between your thighs; something you had never experienced before and something you knew you shouldn’t have felt at all in this holy place. And more likely you should’ve never clenched harder around Jimin’s finger when you heard the small shudder in each breath he took. 
"Ahh baby—" The faint, breathy little whimper shattered his voice. "fuck.. you’re so perfect… so f-fucking perfect." 
Your heart pounded in your chest, your breath shallow and ragged, mirroring the rhythm of his finger. With his warm breath tickling your ear, his whispered words were barely audible, but they still managed to send shivers down your spine.  
"Ooh, h-how I wish to see this perfect fucking pussy."   
Jimin couldn’t take his eyes off of you as he watched your face intently, committing every single feature and expression to his memory. The way your brows were furrowed in pleasure, the way you fought to keep your eyes open due to the sensitivity. 
He couldn’t help but admire the way your chest rose and fell with each ragged breath, the way you tried to stifle your moans under his hand, and the way your juices flowed from your aching cunt.  
You were a captivating sight, sinful and alluring, flesh heated and glistening with arousal, and he knew you couldn’t deny it even though you tried. Your trembling body and the slickness on his fingers were evidence of the truth.  
He slowly added a second finger, stretching you open further and moving faster, his fingers stroking your sensitive spot, sending waves of pleasure through you. With every stroke, you felt your body weakening, and your thoughts began to succumb to the corrupting pleasure.  
Despite your protests, your body responded eagerly, arching towards him in a desperate plea for more;  seeking more of the exquisite pleasure he was giving you.  
You never felt so conflicted in your entire life, your mind was a battlefield; torn between your beliefs and the undeniable pleasure that was now coursing through your veins. Every creak of the old wooden pews felt like a judgment, a cruel reminder that you were committing a sin that would send you to the depths of damnation.  
But when Jimin serendipitously grazed your swollen clit with his thumb, your mind went blank. You’d lost it.  
Your hips involuntarily jerked against his hand, unable to contain the overwhelming pleasure. You gritted your teeth, determined to keep your cries of ecstasy at bay, but it was a dead effort as you squirmed and moaned, muffled by his hand covering your mouth.  
"Fuck— Don’t moan like that, you’re getting too loud, keep quiet."  
But you couldn’t. It was as if your head was spinning, unable to focus on anything except the pleasure. The way he slid his fingers in and out of you, his thumb perfectly stimulating your clit, it was too much.  
Despite your efforts, you couldn’t contain the small moans that escaped your lips. The church was now just a blur in the background, the stained glass windows casting kaleidoscopic patterns on the floor.  
"Shit, baby, keep fucking quiet or do you want me to slip those fucking panties off and stuff them in your mouth, hm?" Jimin’s whispered words sent shivers down your spine, making you clasp around his fingers right back in. 
"Y-yeah, you want that baby? My nasty girl, s-so good... so fucking perfect." He moved his fingers faster, his thumb circling deliciously on your clit, building up the pace for your climax, your body crying out for release. And oh, how he reveled in it, savoring every moment, every sensation as his little flower finally opened its petals to him. 
"You’re so close, baby, f-fuck— just let go, let me take you there."  
As Jimin’s fingers brought you closer and closer to the brink, you couldn’t help but give in, feeling all the guilt and shame wash away in the face of the intense pleasure you were feeling.  
„Ooh, fuck— Y-yeah, baby, go on. Come all over my fucking fingers.” 
Just as you were about to reach the peak, a sudden thud broke through the lustful haze. Your tear-filled eyes fluttered open and you glanced up to the top of the church’s gallery, where you saw the organ player, Mr. Min sprawled on the ground at the bottom of the stairs, amidst a sea of fallen notes.  
In that moment, time seemed to stand still as your eyes met his, and you saw the shock and disbelief on his once serene face.  
Your heart plummeted like a falling star, sinking into the depths of your stomach as you realized what you must look like to Mr. Min. Your cheeks burned with the heat of a thousand suns as you met his gaze, his face a canvas of flushed embarrassment, crushing you with shame and guilt. 
For in the eyes of Mr. Min, you were no other, but a sinner caught in the act of sin in the house of the divine. And as the notes of the holy music lay scattered at his feet, you couldn’t help but wonder if they were a reflection of your shattered innocence.  
Mr. Min quickly ascended the stairs to the organ, his emotions were in disarray, a tumultuous blend of arousal and embarrassment. With each step, he tried to push away the image of what he had just seen, but it lingered like a haunting melody in his mind.  
His cheeks burned with shame, but he couldn’t help stealing a glance at you before he reached the top of the stairs, his feline eyes burning you whole.  
Exposed and vulnerable, you were unable to look at the organ player in the eyes anymore. You closed your eyes tight in an attempt to block out the intensity of his gaze. But even with your eyes shut, you could feel his feline eyes looking down at you.  
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head at the image, Jimin’s skillful fingers never faltered to move inside you, your body feeling like it was exploding. A soft whimper escaped your lips, which got silenced by his firm grasp.  
With each second you felt yourself surrendering to the overwhelming ecstasy.  
As you teetered on the edge, ready to fall into the abyss of pleasure, you were suddenly jolted back to reality, finding yourself next to Jimin who was kneeling humbly on the wooden pew of the church, praying.   
With eyes wide open, heated cheeks and heavy breathing you gazed at your own clasped hands on the pew.  
Was this all in your head? How could you have let your mind wander to sinful desires in the sacred walls of the church?   
Jimin’s innocent devotion to his God only amplified your own guilt, making you feel like a fallen angel in the presence of his pure soul.  
Jimin couldn’t help but smirk, he bit the inside of his cheek, but it didn’t help hiding it. He moved his clasped hands toward his mouth to hide the devilish smirk that appeared on his lips. 
For he knew the power he held over you, the power to seduce and corrupt your very being. And with each passing day he was one step closer to claiming your body and soul for his own. 
And as you sat there, lost in a whirlwind of emotions, Jimin continued to pray, his facade of innocence masking the devilish intentions that lurked within. 
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7ndipity · 3 months
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Aftercare Headcanons
Ot7 x Reader
Summary: How each member would handle aftercare with their S/o
Warnings: mentions of sex(nothing explicit tho), not proofread
A/N: Thanks to the lovely anon who requested this!(note: since I did a similar list for Hobi a while back, part of his section is kinda reiterations from that post).
Masterlist
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Jin:
Aftercare with him is pretty quiet, tbh. He tends to get a lil shy after sex, especially if it was a rougher, more intense session, so he mainly likes to just hold you and talk for a while to help you both calm down.
He’s pretty simplistic when it comes to his routine(hydrate, wash up, sleep), but he’s super cute and gentle about the whole process, cracking lame jokes here and there to make you laugh(lowkey bc it’s part of how he checks to make sure you’re in a good headspace afterwards, but also just bc it’s Jin)
Lots of soft kisses and lingering touches as the two of you clean up(loves showering with you and would totally just stay in there hugging you till the water runs cold)
Will happily make you both some snacks if you’re hungry, but he definitely needs a nap with you to fully recharge.
Yoongi:
As I’ve said before, acts of service is his main love language, so this is very much his wheelhouse.
He’s surprisingly cuddly after sex, especially if it was a more intense session. He finds quiet skinship afterwards even more important than during the act. He might restrict your hands so you can’t touch him during sex, but afterwards he’s making sure to hold them and let you touch and feel him, helping both of you ground yourselves.
He might not be the most elaborate with his routine, but he’s very serious about the basics. Like, he knows you might feel too tired to do much, but he will nag your ear off about dehydration and the dangers of UTIs if he has to till you drink some water and go to the bathroom.
He kinda melts when you look after him too, tending any scratches or marks and offering to massage any sore muscles. He’s used to being the one in the caregiver role, so when the roles reverse, he turns into the softest baby.
Hobi:
He’s so soft and giggly after sex, his hands never leaving you, playing with your hands as he leaves little kisses all over your face, speaking softly as he asks how you feel and if there’s anything you need.
He tends to go into caretaker mode a lil bit, making sure you have some water, maybe a snack if you feel up for it, carefully checking you over for any marks or sore spots that need extra care if it was a more intense session.
He almost forgets to look after himself as well until you kinda take the reins on him, treating him in much the same manner as he does you. Loves when you wash his hair for him in the shower.
After you’re both clean and back in the bed, he likes to just kinda hang out with you, watching a movie or show together, even though he almost always ends up falling asleep while you play with his hair.
Namjoon:
Honestly, he gets a little shy/nervous during aftercare? He knows he has a tendency of getting pretty rough even during softer sessions, so once he calms down and his head clears, he wants to make sure you’re okay and that he didn’t go overboard.
Handles you so tenderly and with so much gentleness. Takes a lot of pride in getting to look after you in such intimate ways, washing and drying your body, helping you get dressed, making sure you eat and drink something before you fall asleep, etc.
Absolutely melts at the way you take care of him afterwards too, always ready with gentle reassurances and soothing touches as you work out any soreness he has(could honestly lead to a super soft round two if you’re not careful)
He doesn’t usually fall asleep that quickly after sex, so once you’re both clean and settled in the bed or wherever, he likes to talk for a while till one of you falls asleep, tending to get a little sentimental as he goes on.
Jimin:
He’s so sweet and comforting after sex, aftercare with him would be full of the softest touches and kisses, refusing to leave your side for more than a minute(unless you want some time by yourself, then he’s waiting impatiently for the second you say okay so he can tackle you for another cuddle session)
Likes just getting to lay with you for a while as you come down, talking quietly while running his hands over your body absent-mindedly or playing with your fingers to help you both ground yourselves.
Takes looking after you quite seriously though, making sure you drink enough water and do some stretches to relieve any soreness in your limbs before moving on to the shower to clean up(where he will continue to hug/cling to you as you help wash each other)
Gets quite tired afterwards, but will only fall asleep once he’s sure you’re both okay and tended to, either holding you close to his chest or vice versa.
Taehyung:
He’s usually super sleepy after sex, so initial aftercare is pretty basic, but still super important for both of you.
He tends to get really clingy, needing to hold you close as the two of you talk and get your bearings, seeking reassurance that you’re okay and that you both feel good, that you love him, etc.
Honestly, you might have to take the reigns a little bit to make sure you’re both clean and hydrated and taken care of in those ways before he falls asleep on you(he just feels soo subby to me, I can’t)
In the morning/after a nap however, you’re waking up to a bubble bath, food, massages, the full royal treatment. He basically waits on you hand and foot for the next couple hours to make up for his initial lack of focus.
Jungkook:
He is so soft but serious about aftercare. He knows he can be more than a little rough when he’s lost in the moment, so he tries to counter that by being extra gentle with you afterwards.
He has the whole thing down to a system, it’s almost like a post workout routine for him, (lowkey the type to high-five you afterwards like “good job babe”🙄)
He’s honestly kinda hyper about the whole thing? Like, as soon as he manages to catch his breath, he’s immediately up and all over the place, getting you both some water, helping you to the bathroom to wash up(will straight up carry you if your legs are shaky) grabbing some fresh sheets if needed.
It’s only once you’re both clean and tended to that he kinda starts to slump and gets tired and cuddly, snuggling close to you before dozing off.
Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz
873 notes · View notes
ugh-yoongi · 1 month
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the very last thing i decide | pjm
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(or, the one in which a love exists that's easy and instinctual as much as it is painful and self-destructive.)
✘ PAIRING jimin x f. reader ✘ SUMMARY you learn what it means to love with blood on your hands. ✘ GENRE hitman/assassin au; angst, smut ✘ RATING explicit. minors dni. ✘ WARNINGS they are both hitmen (hitpeople?) so there's all the content that goes along with that: violence, death, mentions of blood (a lot) and weapons, murder, but no explicit gore. everyone is morally grey at best and downright psychotic at worst (especially yoongi). reader gets stabbed. no one knows how to be a functional human being. swearing, smoking, light smut (penetrative & oral sex), miscommunication and unrequited love but not really, i drop a classic tumblr meme in a line of dialogue. ambiguous/hopeful ending!! some of the themes here are kinda heavy and i am not entirely sure how to tag them so if you have any questions pls don’t hesitate to ask! ✘ WORDCOUNT 12k ✘ LISTEN TO manchester orchestra - telepath ✘ THANK YOU i cannot remember everyone i’ve showed this to over the years. @the-boy-meets-evil for looking this over and brainstorming with me today. @hot-soop for always being a help. @effortandmore because you told me an embarrassingly long time ago this was worth finishing. and i’m pretty sure i also sent this to @jihopesjoint at some point too. i did a quick edit of this on my own, but after nearly three years i just wanted it posted and out of my wips so i'm sure i missed things. pls ignore them. ✘ AUTHOR'S NOTE fic drops two days in a row?? who am i?? i started this in may 2021 and it was supposed to be a simple pegging fic. i abandoned it bc i was convinced no one would want to read it. between today and yesterday i have written thousands of words and made it across the finish line. i hope you like it. the violence is a metaphor for love or whatever.
[37.5665° N, 126.9780° E | Seoul, SOUTH KOREA]
Jimin’s hair had been red the first time he met you.
How fitting, he thinks, considering he’s currently bleeding out on a table.
Well, there’s still a bit of fight left in him. He hasn’t lost consciousness yet, which he assumes is a good sign; he can still hear Hoseok barking out orders quite clearly. The edges of his vision are fuzzy and the pain in his abdomen is sharp and unrelenting, but he still has enough brain power left to wish he’d died instead.
Because you’d saved his life. And now he’s further indebted to you.
(Jimin never leaves a debt unpaid, but he’s not sure how to make even on something like this.)
Jungkook and Taehyung are fetching supplies faster than Hoseok can ask for them. Two pairs of frazzled, spaced-out eyes. Four sets of trembling limbs. Namjoon’s wearing burn marks into the floor, his cuticles bloody and nearly worried to the bone since he can’t keep them out of his mouth.
And then there’s you.
Sitting cross-legged in a chair as you scroll through your phone. Jimin’s blood is still drying on your hands, leaving smears as you drag your thumb back and forth across the screen, and this doesn’t seem to faze you one bit.
Behind you, Yoongi takes a seat at the piano and starts playing Toccata and Fugue in D minor, and Jimin simply cannot die like this. He can’t die on a wooden table in a room with a piano on which Min Yoongi is playing Baroque organ pieces.
“What is this, a fucking funeral?” Hoseok snaps, though there’s a desperation creeping into his tone that Jimin does not like, does not want to hear. “Cut it out, Yoongi.”
Said man staunchly ignores the doctor, transitioning flawlessly into the fugue. Jimin barely hears the tinkle of your laughter but he hears it all the same, and he wants to pretend it doesn’t calm him, bring him back down to earth when he starts drifting too far away. But you do, and it does, and all he can think about is: will you miss him if he dies? Will it take you long to wash his blood from your hands?
Hoseok’s absolutely incensed, pushed to the limits of his stress at the thought of not being able to save Jimin’s life, and Jimin appreciates this, really, but not when Hoseok pushes two gloved fingers deep into the wound in his stomach so hard all he can do is cry. “Yoongi—”
You snort. You don’t even look up from your phone.
Namjoon, for all his leadership and stoicism and poise under pressure, is just as frantic and panicked as the rest. It’s not everyday one of his people is inches from death ten feet away from him. Most people usually die in the shadows. Kim Namjoon has faced down death more times than most, yet watching the life slowly fade from Jimin’s eyes is too much even for him. “Yoongi, please—”
But the fugue keeps going, tempo change after tempo change, the two pillars of this organization spiraling completely by the time the coda starts, unfocused and sweating and praying. To gods they don’t believe in, to hope, to chance—whatever and whoever might be listening. Jimin usually loves hearing Yoongi play. It’s the only thing that humanizes him, and Jimin had spent so many restless nights shoulder to shoulder with him on that exact bench in the blue hours of the early morning, hypnotized by the way the older man’s knobby fingers moved across the keys.
This is it, he thinks.
Jimin’s going to die with Toccata and Fugue in D minor playing in the background.
He’s imagined his death so many times. Stupid not to in this line of work. Violent, quick and painless, in his sleep, drawn out and gory, a message. And in all of those scenarios, it’s either jarringly silent or there’s someone screaming. Usually him, sounding much like he is now, two fingers stuck in his gut. In all of those scenarios, Min Yoongi is never playing Bach as everything fades to black.
You sigh. “Shut the fuck up, Yoongi,” you say, your tone as blasé and inconvenienced as ever.
Shocked at your audacity, one of Yoongi’s fingers slips and hits the wrong key, something dissonant and metallic as it rings out. But the music stops all the same, the silence nearly giving Jimin whiplash. Now he can hear the clinkof Hoseok’s tools, the squelching of his wound, Jungkook’s desperate pleading for him to just be alright, please God, just hang on. He wants the music back. He doesn’t want Jungkook’s crying to be the last thing he hears. Doesn’t want the sound of his own organs imprinted into his memory.
“What’d you say?” Yoongi asks, because no one talks to him that way. They wouldn’t dare. Most people try not to talk to him at all.
But you do.
And, inexplicably, Yoongi listens.
You roll your eyes. “You go deaf in your old age? I said shut the fuck up. Hoseok’s two knuckles deep in Jimin’s fucking stomach and you’re over there having your little Amadeus moment.”
He bristles. “Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?” Yoongi repeats, and Jimin can’t see him, but he knows his eyes are narrowed, lips pulled back in a snarl, fists clenched at his side.
“Oh, princess,” you coo, and Yoongi’s fury is palpable, permeates every inch of this place, overrides all the fear and anguish. “I’m talking to you, baby. I know Jiminie’s busy trying not to die and that’s stressful for all of us, but please do try to keep up.”
Jimin hears the flick of Yoongi’s switchblade. Then he hears him say, “Please let me fucking kill her,” in that lazy Daegu drawl of his, like forming full words are beneath him. Not worth the effort when they’re directed at you.
Still seated, you uncross your legs and, through blurred vision, Jimin watches you grab Yoongi by his belt loops to tug him closer, grab the wrist that holds his knife and press it to your own throat. “Don’t threaten me with a good time, Yoongi. Be a good boy and make it hurt.”
Jungkook’s near hysterics at Jimin’s side. “What the fuck is wrong with you two? He’s dying!”
Jimin tries to say I’m not, Kookie, I’m okay but the pressure on his abdomen is too intense. He can barely breathe, and Hoseok’s still digging around, still looking for that stupid fucking bullet, had to do something and do it quick so there’d been very little anesthetic and finesse, and he’s silently screaming for someone to just comfort Jungkook, tell him everything’s going to be okay, but instead—
“Serves him right for being a fucking idiot,” you say, words muffled by the knife still pressed to your throat. “What a painful, permanentlesson in not forgetting your fucking vest.”
“Stop it!” Jungkook sobs, fingers ghosting along Jimin’s matted fringe.
Yoongi’s still scowling. “Just say the word, Joon-ah. I’ll make it quick.”
You actually laugh at that. The kind of full-belly laugh Jimin would kill to be able to produce. “You wanna fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid.”
Someone snarls. Probably Yoongi. “You’d look so good gutted on the floor like a fish,” he replies, and if Jimin knows him at all, he knows he’s got that dreamy, faraway look in his eyes. The one he always gets when he’s about to kill—the one that makes him so unhinged and dangerous. “Left there to bleed out and die all alone like the trash you are.”
No one’s survived that look before, but you just grin, as if being on the receiving end of it is nothing more than another simple inconvenience. “Do it, then,” you prompt. “You’re so big and bad, yet here you are, waiting for Namjoon’s permission like some kind of pathetic fucking dog.”
“I’m no one’s dog.”
Your eyes slowly flick over to Namjoon. “No?” you ask, smile widening as Jimin watches you drag your heeled foot up the inside of Yoongi’s calf, his thigh, stiletto coming to rest in the center of his sternum. “That’s a shame, princess. That pretty neck of yours was just made for a collar.”
There’s no doubt in Jimin’s mind now that he actually died back in that penthouse and is now residing in whatever level of hell is watching you give his associate a semi despite him being a millisecond away from murdering you.
Yoongi would do it, too. No hesitation. You’ve been on his shit list for as long as Jimin can remember, and you’ve been daring him to put his money where his mouth is and just kill you already for just as long.
Taehyung groans. “Can you two just fuck already so the rest of us can be spared of this?”
You click your tongue, tone melting like butter. You’re fond of Taehyung, soft on him. “No can do, angel. Yoongi here knows I only have eyes for our Jiminie, and god does that hurt his little feelings.”
Your wicked smile gives away nothing—whether you’re telling a bold truth or just unnecessarily needling Yoongi further—but Jimin’s caught off guard and chokes on your words nonetheless.
Hoseok’s forceps still digging around in his stomach, there’s a quiet hurrah of triumph as he finally locates the bullet. Jimin feels nothing as he retrieves it and plucks it out, a reverberated clank! as he drops it into a kidney dish, your words the anesthetic he’s needed as they play on a loop in his head.
When he finally blacks out, either from the pain or the adrenaline or both, it’s your face that greets him. He never gets the chance to tell you why he forgot his vest.
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[64.1466° N, 21.9426° W | Reykjavík, ICELAND]
Jimin’s hair is blue when it happens the first time.
It’s November. Namjoon has sent the two of you to Reykjavik and it’s dark all the time, the midnight hue of his hair blending into the impenetrable nighttime that surrounds you. Jimin works best like this—out of sight, part of the shadows. He’s light on his feet, lithe in ways no one else is, not even you, and he’s impossible to anticipate under the cover of darkness.
That’s why Jimin always takes care of the appetizers.
It’s your job to clean up the main course.
The two of you are two halves of the same lethal coin, working together flawlessly after years of carefully honed practice. Jimin slams an unsuspecting man’s head into a wall and you’re right behind him to put a bullet in it.
It’s just how it goes.
And he trusts you. He has to, otherwise he would’ve gotten taken out years ago. You’re not always in his line of sight, but he always feels you, senses your movements before you’re even on your feet. The times it’s gone wrong—and it’s gone wrong so many fucking times, despite how cautious and skilled the two of you are—you’re always right there to catch him before he even hits the ground. Just like a ghost, as if your only purpose in life is keeping Jimin safe and alive.
(It isn’t, but it sure feels that way.)
Tonight it’s another hit carried out in an overpriced penthouse overlooking the northern shore. You’re in and out, don’t waste a second more than you need to. Jimin doesn’t spare a glance at the carnage left behind. Nothing he hasn’t seen a hundred times before. All blood bleeds the same, but he still wonders, foolishly, if his looks different to you. If it feels wrong when it stains your hands and seeps into your clothes.
Jimin has never been covered in your blood before, but he likes to think it would.
The two of you don’t speak until you’re in the quiet safety of yet another hotel room, chain lock thrown across the door, deadbolt secured. A small arsenal of weapons is retrieved from ankles and waistbands and cleaned and packed away meticulously. Jimin’s the one who makes the call to Namjoon, tells him in code that the job’s done. You’ve barely broken a sweat, but under the fluorescent light of the bathroom, Jimin can see a small smattering of blood just along your temple when he closes the distance between you.
Someone else’s, of course.
Anyone who made you bleed your own blood wouldn’t be a quick, clean kill. Jimin would make sure of that.
There’s less to be done about the half-inch scar in the hollow of your throat—a pearlescent reminder of the twin scar he has just below his navel; a callback to the day your devilish mouth said the words Jimin can’t stop thinking about.
“No can do, angel. Yoongi here knows I only have eyes for our Jiminie.”
Maybe it’s stupidity. Maybe it’s the feral, years-long build up that’s been simmering between the two of you—low enough to keep warm, contained enough to never evolve into a rapid boil. Maybe Jimin’s just finally desperate enough to go seeking out answers to questions he’s far too scared to put a voice to.
(Really, Jimin knows it’s adrenaline. Nothing more than chemicals. The two of you high on it, heads floating above the clouds. Powerless; or, at the very least, indifferent to stop the very clear path that’s unfolding on the ground below.)
But, god, he needs to know.
Needs answers.
Needs to know if there’s even a chance you feel it, too: the magnetic ebb and flow the two of you have been dancing around for years. If you see how fondly he looks at you. If you have any idea how easy it is for him to get lost in you. If you know he’d let someone put a bullet between his eyes before he placed his life in the hands of anyone else.
Jimin knows he loves you. He’s known it for a long time, just like he knows all those other things that are second nature to him. Loving you is easy and instinctual as much as it is painful and self-destructive.
At least that’s what he’d thought. Until your devilish mouth said those devilish words and sent him into a tailspin he’s yet to recover from.
You have to feel it. God, can’t you? The way the air crackles between you. The way his skin ignites with a simple look from you. The trembling of his fingers at his sides, desperate to just reach out and touch you—fingers that have been bathed in blood, that have taken life. Fingers that now just want to graze softly across your cheekbones, catch on your bottom lip. Fingers that want to hand you the world on a silver platter. Jimin would do anything for you, give you whatever you wanted. You wouldn’t even have to ask.
Can’t you feel that?
He needs to know.
Jimin is composed, elegant. He kills with grace and still maintains as much of his softness as he can. Isn’t ruled by emotion the way Yoongi and Jungkook are. But now, as he teeters on the edge of the unknown, all he wants to do is jump. Wants to buck all his training, all his resolve and forethought, and jump.
“Did you mean it?” he asks, voice thick. Fingers curl into the expensive silk of his shirt just so they have something to do—something to keep them from reaching out and touching you. “Back in Seoul.”
You’re the smartest person Jimin knows. When you ask, “Did I mean what, Chim?” he knows you’re fucking with him. Dragging this out. You know exactly what he’s asking and he knows you’ll never give anything away so easily.
“What you said to Taehyung,” he answers.
You tsk, eyebrows raising in intrigue. As much as Jimin trusts you, as well as you know him, know all those dirty, dirty secrets he’d never tell anyone else, he’s never been so bold with you. “That those long fingers of his would look good wrapped around my throat? Yeah, I meant that.”
Jimin’s jaw clenches at your taunt. “Don’t play games with me.”
A smirk graces your lips. “Trust me, sweetheart,” you say, voice sickly-sweet as the affection starts popping at the last seams holding him together, “if I wanted to play with you, there’s nothing you could do to stop it.”
With Jimin pressed into the wall behind you, you turn to meet his eye in the mirror. Another smile, teeth bared as you run your tongue across your lips, and this one is his undoing. Makes his cock twitch in his dress pants. Makes him bold. “Do you want to, then?” He takes a step forward—close enough to smell the gunpowder stuck to your clothes, your hair. Close enough for the sulfur and metal to sting his nostrils each time he breathes you in. “Do you want to play with me?”
You love Jimin. Maybe it’s a trauma bond or the implicit, unwavering trust the two of you have in one another, but you know you love him limitlessly. But you also know you can’t love him the way he loves you, the way he deserves to be loved by someone, which is why your mask slips as you say, “I can’t give you what you want, Jimin.”
You try to make him understand that. Really, you do—because Jimin is the smartest person you know, and you know he’s thought about every possible consequence down to the most minute detail and has decided this is worth it anyway. You want to believe in something the way Jimin believes in you, even though he’s wrong. You want something worth throwing all of this away for.
Maybe it’s Jimin, maybe it’s not. Maybe it’s just been so fucking long since someone has looked at you with any gentleness in their eyes at all that when Jimin meets your gaze and says, “I don’t want anything more than you’re willing to give,” you take his hand and jump, too.
And there’s nothing gentle about the first time.
It’s all raw, urgent need, Jimin trying desperately to convince himself it’s more than it is while you convince yourself it’s less.
It’s the two of you finally giving up and giving in, letting yourselves be pulled taut by that invisible string tying you together.
It’s Jimin’s sharp intake of breath when you fully step out of your clothes, the sight rendering him immobile. Whatever plans he’d had before seeing the curves of your body, all the scars from years of working by his side, the mottled yellow-greens and purples from the bruises lining your skin—he has no plans now. Can barely think. Wouldn’t be able to tear his eyes away from you with a gun to his head.
It’s the final bricks of the wall he’d built around himself—around his heart, around all those words and feelings he’d never put a voice to—crumbling into ash at his feet. Now he knows he can’t go back. Can’t return to a reality where this isn’t his truth. Where there’s no you and him, him and you. Where it’s just a physical exchange, a give-and-take, tit for tat.
And god, he knows he shouldn’t think like this; knows he’s keeping the truth buried somewhere deep behind lock and key.
…But now that he knows how it feels to move inside you, what else is he supposed to do?
You’re everywhere. Clenched around him. Your taste on his tongue. The feel of you on the pads of his fingers. The smell of you making a mockery of all logical thought. No—no, he can’t do a goddamn thing to stop the avalanche now it’s started.
“Fuck,” he whines, fingers digging into your hips. The soft skin he finds purchase in such a contrast from your hardened exterior, but Jimin knows. He knows you, knows the person behind the mask, sees straight through you each time it slips.
What stared back at him had always been just out of reach.
Taunting him.
Screaming come and get me, come make me yours, come and fucking take what you want.
Until now.
Now it’s tangible. Now it’s breathy, fractured moans that echo off tile walls. Now it’s the sound of his name thatleaves your lips like a prayer. Now it’s the sheen of sweat that covers both of you. Now it’s nails scraping down his back, tangling in the hair at the nape of his neck.
(And Jimin won’t tell you this, but those red welts are proof that this is real, this happened, and later on when he’s alone, when his mind is working overtime, he’ll look at them and he’ll smile. Because they’re real. Because this happened.)
Now, it’s the way blue becomes his favorite color. Because he can see his reflection in the mirror as he unravels and comes to his own demise as he spills inside of you; can see the fluorescent lights reflecting off the hue of his hair.
Jimin’s hair is blue when he realizes he’s in love with you.
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[34.6037° S, 58.3816° W | Buenos Aires, ARGENTINA]
Jimin is blond when Namjoon sends you to South America.
The details had been scarce: a diplomatic advisor with a rap sheet of human rights violations that have been continuously swept under the rug and his equally-corrupt lawyer. A candid photograph paperclipped to another manila folder, Namjoon a fan of all those old cliches. Likes being a little cheeky that way when he can get away with it, because god knows he can’t get away with much, doesn’t have much of a sense of humor.
It’s a simple job. You and Jimin will have it dealt with in a matter of hours. Less if you’re lucky and the universe is agreeable. But the humidity sticks to your skin, has sweat seeping into your clothes and rolling down your temples, and if there’s one thing you can’t stand it’s the heat. Makes it hard to think. And Namjoon—Namjoon, who makes sure all of his agents want for nothing—is a cheap bastard. Rarely approves nice lodging, says it’s too risky despite your arguments to the contrary, that people don’t care what you do when you have money, so you’re stuck in some shithole motel room with an aircon unit that keeps blowing out stale, warm air.
And maybe you shouldn’t, maybe you should be more cognizant of Jimin and all his feelings, but it’s fucking hot, so you peel your shirt over your head and undo the button of your pants. Sit on the edge of the bed and try to think about anything other than the temperature, how it’s starting to prick uncomfortably at your skin.
Jimin clears his throat, keeps his eyes glued to the disgusting carpet. “Got a text from Seokjin-ssi,” he says, words strained. “Looks like they’ll be solo jobs.”
You groan. Leave it to Seokjin to change the plan at the last minute. “Tell Kim Seokjin he’s a useless piece of shit.”
“Done. Anything else?”
“Tell Kim Namjoon if he ever sends us to South America in the summer again I’ll kill him myself.”
Jimin has a laugh like an anodyne. A laugh that takes all those broken, bleeding parts of you and soothes over them like a balm. “Seokjin-ssi says he’s not passing along that particular message.”
“Tell him he’s a bitch, then.”
“He’ll kill me if I say that.”
“He hasn’t done field work in years and he’s probably too vitamin D deficient to leave the basement. He couldn’t even kill a fucking rat.”
There’s another laugh. More forced, less tinkling. You recognize it right away, the sound of anxiety. Solo jobs aren’t common for the two of you. For Yoongi and Taehyung, sure, but not you and Jimin. You’re a team for a reason, and though you’re more than capable of getting this done and out of the way, it doesn’t feel right. Settles in your gut like something rotten, knowing you’ll be without Jimin.
And you know he’s thinking it, too. How he turns the burner over and over in his hands, as if there’s some combination of words he can send back to Seoul to get Seokjin and Namjoon to reconsider. Plans don’t change often; not like this, anyway. These have been declared solos for a reason, and that’s a thought you can’t linger on too long.
“Are they leaving it up to us?” Jimin nods, still not meeting your eye. “Do you have a preference?”
He shrugs, tossing the phone on the small table in the corner. Nothing else to be done. “Not really. What do you think?”
“Nah, don’t care, either. Just toss me one.”
Santiago Aguirre… 47 years old… Resides in a high-rise luxury apartment in Retiro…
Your eyes skim the file, study the black and white photograph of the lawyer. Read over the list of all his high-profile, degenerate clients and all their high-profile crimes. You read about the previous attempts on his life, the seemingly never-ending list of people who want him dead. Your eyes go back to his photograph, frowning at the smug look on his face. What stares back at you is a man who thinks he’s invincible, who thinks a penthouse apartment on the top floor and a security team in the lobby means he’s impervious to harm. A man who has made money off people just like him: dirty, corrupt, hands stained red.
“Okay?” Jimin asks, looking up from his own file.
He’s so striking. So safe. And you know what he’s done, giving you the hit he thinks is easier, willing to risk himself on a solo mission to ensure you make it out. There’s no guarantees in this line of work, in life in general, but Jimin’s brand of selfless love is certainly one.
So you just nod, knowing someone slimy like this can quickly go sideways, and decide you can do the same.
“I’m gonna get ready,” you say. “The plan is the same as all the other solo jobs. Get in, get it done, get out as quickly as possible. Lay low. Don’t come straight back here.”
Jimin rolls his eyes good-naturedly. “Anything else?”
You exhale. Try to quiet the nerves roiling in your stomach. Barely resist the urge to press a lingering kiss to Jimin’s forehead before you swallow hard and say, “Yeah. Stay alive.”
It comes out more like a plea.
You’re good at your job.
Rarely feel much guilt over it, either, which—well, you’re not sure what that means. That something is permanently broken in your psyche, probably. Being able to take life so easily and without remorse. It’s not natural.
Kim Namjoon is a man who plays God, is the one who decides who gets to live and who has to die. His word is the only law you adhere to. And that’s… that’s something. Makes it less burdensome, takes some weight off, because Kim Namjoon wouldn’t accept a morally-ambiguous job. He wouldn’t ask you to put your life on the line for some petty bullshit.
This is how you’ve lived for the last four years. Four years of blindly following Namjoon’s word, of being a good little soldier and doing whatever is asked of you. Four years of being responsible for not only your own life, but Jimin’s as well, just as he is for yours. Four years that have served you well, all things considered.
Until now.
Something about this job hits you hard. Doesn’t settle quite as quickly as the ones that have come before. For the first time, you’d looked down at the lifeless body at your feet and couldn’t stop the trembling, could barely quell the nausea. Thought what the fuck am I doing, what kind of life is this for the first time. Thought back to that day four years ago when Kim Namjoon saved your life and offered you a job and wondered, for the first time, what would’ve happened if you’d said no.
Now, as you suck on a cigarette, legs dangling off the roof of a building looking not far from collapse, a new thought:
Would Namjoon let you go if you asked?
He’s taken care of you. For four years you’ve wanted for nothing. Have socked away more money than you’ll ever be able to spend, even if you live to a thousand. You could go anywhere, become anyone, and no one would suspect a thing. There’d just be you and a million lifetimes’ worth of transgressions, alone under the weight of all that burden; alone, except for all the ghosts that come to greet you every time you close your eyes.
Doesn’t matter. Namjoon might be willing to let you go, give you the chance to salvage something from this life in the name of normalcy, but Yoongi would gladly put a bullet in your head before he let you disappear with all his secrets.
Doesn’t matter.
You stub out the cigarette and put the butt in your pocket. Make your way down to the street. Stay under the shadows—just visible enough to redirect any suspicion shot your way. You pretend to take a call, flawless Argentinian Spanish falling from your lips as you tell the imaginary person on the other end all about your fucked up day at work. How your manager never gets off your ass, doesn’t trust you, thinks you’re too fucking stupid to run a simple executable.
No one spares you a second glance.
Not here, on this nondescript street in a nondescript Argentinian neighborhood, and not when you stumble into the tiny lobby of your shithole motel. The poor kid behind the desk doesn’t even glance up, just mutters a good evening, miss under his breath that you return in a voice far too high-pitched to be your own.
Better to be seen and be unremarkable than draw attention to yourself trying to stay invisible, you figure.
The cameras in the stairwell are broken so you take the steps two at a time. Pull the room key from its place inside your boot, happy to no longer have it digging into your skin. Pause just long enough to make sure you don’t hear anything on the other side of the door before you’re unlocking it with your free hand wrapped around the trigger of your gun.
It’s empty.
Of course it is.
Jimin stashed the burner in a place no one but you would think to look. You text one simple word to Seokjin—Hey!—and you get two in return: Who’s this?
You know who it is, you fucking dickhead.
It takes a few seconds, but the reply is a simple—
Sorry.
Then you toss aside the phone and float in the darkness of the room. There’s nothing to do but wait, because you don’t dare to do anything alone. There’s sweat and blood and fuck knows what else stuck to your skin, your hair, but you can’t risk taking a shower. Can’t risk the water dampening your senses. Can’t risk being cornered in a moldy bathroom, only one way out. Can’t risk doing anything alone. Can’t take a fucking shower.
It’s this thought, more than anything else, that has your body flushing with rage.
What kind of life is this?
Namjoon had never mentioned repaying your debt. He’d never insinuated you owed him anything at all for saving your life, but you know something like that never comes for free. Namjoon doesn’t do anything just because. Has no goodness in his heart to do anything in the name of it. Watching Jimin nearly die in front of him had been the exception to his usual nature; a rare slip-up by an otherwise detached, uncaring man.
Still, whatever you owe him has surely been repaid by now. Tenfold, if the bloodstains along your collar are anything to go by.
It’s time for Namjoon to let you go.
Something is wrong.
Two hours have ticked by and there’s no word from Jimin. No word from Namjoon or Seokjin, either, which is the only reason you’re still in this nauseating motel room and not out on the streets searching for him. Solo jobs don’t go like this. The two of you are always in and out, tragically efficient. Back to where you started and then back on a plane, nothing left behind except a singular bullet hole and another fragmented piece of your conscience.
You’ve had a lot of jobs go wrong, but never two hours.
You’re about three minutes from coming out of your skin. Sick to your stomach with worry, anxiety weighing you down like an anchor. You wouldn’t be able to go out searching for Jimin like this even if you could, and there’s no point in dwelling on that, examining it further. All you can do is wait.
It’s another hour before you hear the click of the lock. You’re nearly on your knees in relief, but you stay rooted to the flimsy mattress. Try not to think about how you’ll have to sleep on it, even though you’ll be up half the night with residual worry. All those lingering ghosts.
Jimin doesn’t say anything, so neither do you.
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[55.6761° N, 12.5683° E | Copenhagen, DENMARK]
Jimin’s hair is orange when you go to Copenhagen.
Not for a job, just to breathe. You wanted to see the city at Christmastime; Jimin’s never been.
You crack a joke. Point out buildings of similar color, have him stand in front of one as you take a picture. Everyone smiles when they pass the two of you on the street, Jimin’s eyes fond even though he rolls them as you pose him how you want. Still stands against an apricot-colored wall and flashes a smile and a peace sign, cheeks pink from the cold. Does a good job of pretending the two of you aren’t here just for fun, that this is something more.
It’s not.
The two of you fucked in a hotel room in Reykjavik and haven’t spoken a word of it since.
You nearly lost your mind over him in Buenos Aires and haven’t spoken a word of that, either.
Instead, his hand finds yours as the two of you walk around Tivoli Gardens. You marvel at the lights and Jimin marvels at you. You share mulled wine and spiced doughnuts. Jimin tries to drag you on the swings but you plant your feet and refuse, laughing through your refusals. As dangerous as your lives are, motion sickness might be the most. He gets his revenge and poses you in front of a giant nutcracker, then again in front of one of the endless Christmas trees.
Jimin pays for the two of you to decorate honey cakes. You’re surrounded by families with shrieking children and palpable adoration, and it’s all you can do not to wonder if anyone you’ve taken out had ever had something like this. Something that makes your soul warm; something that still lingers in your bones years later.
The two of you take a selfie when it starts to snow. It stings when you have no one to send it to, so it just lives in your phone. Maybe it’s enough.
On another day, Jimin holds your hand through Torvehallerne. This time you marvel at him while he marvels at all the food, eyes wide each time he turns to ask if he should buy something. You always say yes and he always shares, and it’s all you can do not to think about why you don’t have to budget yourselves. Why you’re able to walk through the market and buy whatever you want; how you could buy every item for sale and it wouldn’t make a dent.
(You pick up small trinkets for Taehyung and Jungkook. Not because you want to, but because it feels nicer than remembering that you have no one to buy gifts for. Not really. Not anymore.)
Jimin wants to ice skate, so you do. He holds your hand then, too. More out of necessity than anything else, and he has none of his usual grace. Someone hands you a free cup of hot chocolate, just because. Jimin pouts and then it’s his hot chocolate. It’s all you can do not to kiss away the whipped cream on the corner of his mouth.
Back in your lavish hotel, after countless days have blurred together and Jimin’s fresh from a shower, skin flushed, you finally ask yourself if it’s worth putting up such a fight. If it’s really all that bad to care for Jimin and be cared for in return. If it’s all that bad to be someone else, just for a little while: someone with a normal life who makes a normal living and has a normal capability to love. Someone who isn’t damaged beyond repair.
That will never be you. Not fully, and certainly not in this lifetime, but maybe it could be, a little.
“Jimin,” you say, because you need to try. Jimin loves you in ways you’ll never understand, and you want to be better for him. “We should talk.”
Your voice is small and hesitant, and Jimin hates it. Sees trouble where there’s only vulnerability, so he misreads. Shakes his head. Takes a risk and stands between your legs at the edge of the bed—yours, because there’s two—as he tilts your head back, thumbs pressing into the contours of your cheeks. The scar still sits in the hollow of your throat, and that version of you feels so far away. That life feels so far away.
There’s no violence here. There’s no blood, no fugues. There’s just you and Jimin, whose voice is small like yours when he shakes his head and says, “You should kiss me instead.”
The second time is nothing like the first.
Jimin moves delicately. Feels like silk lace, tastes like spun sugar. Moves both his mouth and his body fluidly, no hesitation, yet he still takes his time. Still pauses to look at you with endless devotion; with awed reverence. Makes a map of your body and marks all his favorite places with his lips.
“Tell me what you want,” he says. Speaks the words against the skin just beneath your ear. “Anything. I’ll give you whatever you want, just have to ask.”
What you want isn’t tangible, isn’t possible, so you stay quiet. Thread your fingers through Jimin’s hair, gasp when he mouths along the column of your throat. Jimin reserves all his softness for you. Bathes you in it. Would kill anyone to keep it that way.
So you say, “Want your mouth,” and let slip a quiet moan when he gives you what you’ve asked for. When he situates himself between your thighs and sucks and licks until you’re writhing, making a mess, grasping fruitlessly at the sheets, his hair, his shoulders, only calming when his hands find yours and your fingers interlock.
Jimin mouths at you until you’re trembling. Until you’re needy and desperate, hips moving on their own, fucking yourself against his face. Until nothing exists except the heat in your belly, the stars behind your eyelids, the heady, fucked-out sound of Jimin’s voice as he talks you through it, murmurs praise against your cunt.
Jimin mouths at you until you forget.
This isn’t your life. This is not something you can have.
But, in the grand scheme of things, what does it matter? You’ve made peace with death, and there’s only one of two ways it’s going to come for you in the end: by Namjoon’s hand or someone else’s. So what does it matter?
This time, Jimin fucks you slow. Kisses you with your taste still in his mouth. Thumbs over a hardened nipple just to see what earns him a reaction, and what you truly want is more time—something else that’s impossible.
Jimin’s hair is orange when you think you might be in love with him.
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[ 48.8566° N, 2.3522° E | Paris, FRANCE ]
Jimin’s hair is pink when—
“Sit,” he says, gesturing to the toilet.
Soaks a washcloth in warm water. Wrings it out. Stands in front of you, and there’s water dripping onto the floor and Jimin doesn’t care, doesn’t seem to see anything in this moment except for you, your hands covered in someone else’s blood, and he reaches out, gently grabs your wrist. Palm up. Someone else’s blood. Everything smells like copper and iron. Looks too surreal beneath the fluorescent lights of this hotel bathroom for your mind to make sense of it.
There is care in the way Jimin cleans your hands. There is tenderness in the way he both refuses to see what you really are and the way he’s the only one to ever see you so entirely, when you look down at the blood he’s washing away and all you can see is stigmata. When all you see is sin.
“I know you don’t love me,” he says, and there is a conviction in his words that stuns you into silence. “Not the way I love you, anyway.”
That tenderness is still there as he says this. As he presses the wet fabric into the meat of your palm, wipes the stains away, and the warmth is as calming as it is undeserved. It feels like something forbidden. It feels like salvation and condemnation all at once, like whatever sick depravity permeates you is contagious, will take over Jimin, too, just from touching you.
Jimin is close enough to reach out and touch. Close enough to see the violence that he exists in alongside you: the rips in his clothes, the scars that decorate his skin. Close enough to know he smells sickly-sweet, just like death. Your hand shakes as it reaches for him and never follows through. Doesn’t want to contaminate him.
“I do,” you finally say. Whatever is in your voice is not conviction. “I can’t.” You suck in a breath, try to steady your breathing. This is where it all comes crashing down, you think, because in all the years you’ve done Namjoon’s bidding, you’ve never cried. You can take life so freely and without thought, but you cannot love Jimin. “Someone like me isn’t capable of it.”
Jimin pauses, the washcloth stuck in the space between your ring and middle fingers. “And who is someone like you?”
Water is still dripping to the floor. Serosanguineous: blood tainting something untouched. Not something one thing or another but both, watery-pink. Looks like Jimin’s hair. “I’ve killed a lot of people,” you answer. “More than I can count. More than I can name. More than the ones that come to haunt me at night.” Your free hand moves to your chest, covers your heart. “There’s nothing here, Jimin. I’m not sure there ever was.”
The washcloth drops to the floor, and all that blood belonging to a man whose name you never bothered to learn before you put a bullet between his eyes finds a new place to rest. “I think,” he begins, clasping your unclean hand in his own, voice dropping to a whisper, “you forget, sometimes.” You gasp as he places your palm to his cheek, drags it across his face, smears a stranger’s blood across his skin. “That we’re the same.”
Jimin is always overwhelming, but the love he has for you is even more so. It consumes you entirely, embeds itself beneath your skin, makes a home, would tear you apart, body and soul, to return to him.
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[ 47.4979° N, 19.0402° E | Budapest, HUNGARY ]
Jimin’s hair is lavender when it all goes to shit.
“You’re being followed.”
Seokjin’s voice is garbled through the earpiece, tinny and metallic, and you roll your eyes. Some things don’t need to be said, because you’ve known someone was following you for the last three blocks. Average height, black peacoat, close-cropped haircut. Not the kind of person that’d stand out here, and that’s exactly why you’d sent Jimin in the other direction.
“No shit,” you respond in Hungarian, because you already know the man following you doesn’t speak or understand it. “Give me somewhere to go.”
It takes Seokjin a few moments to run the translation. “There’s a side street up on your right,” he answers. “It’s tight, but there’s an alleyway at the end. You can buy some time if you’re quick.”
“Where’s Jimin?”
You pass a vendor selling lángos and duck into the street behind the stall. Just as Seokjin had said, there’s a small alleyway up on the left, and your footfall is near-silent as you break into a sprint to reach it. “Safe,” is all Seokjin says.
You take a second to steady your breathing, knowing you’re good on time—the man following you was close enough to know where you’d turned, but, if you’re lucky, not much after that. That plays on a loop: if you’re lucky, if you’re lucky, if you’re lucky. What is luck, what does it look like, in a life left entirely to chance? In a life with no guarantees?
You tuck yourself away, focus on Seokjin’s metallic breaths. Think about his basement in Seoul, why he’s in it. Ask, “What happened in Addis Ababa?” because it feels important to know.
There’s not much you know about Seokjin’s life. Whatever happened in Ethiopia had been before your time, reduced to hushed whispers and gossip fodder after your arrival. No one spoke of it, Seokjin especially, but every now and then something would slip in the same way weeds grow in sidewalk cracks.
A job gone wrong. A bombing at the consulate with Seokjin inside.
His reply is simple, words spoken carefully: “I loved someone once, too.”
He can’t see it, but you nod nonetheless; an answer that doesn’t require a response, because you know. It’s enough to fill in the rest. What Seokjin’s trauma looks like. Why he doesn’t do field work anymore. Why he prefers the solitude of the basement, rarely a sound beyond the electric thrum of the server racks.
Who had gone in to retrieve him, and why Yoongi has the scar over his eye.
“You loved someone,” you conclude, “and he would’ve been willing to die for you.”
“Yes,” Seokjin says, and it’s like the word’s been punched out of him. Sounds like something repressed, something left to rot in the darkest corner of the world.
Love, to Seokjin, looks and sounds the same as death.
“I think most people spend their entire lives searching for a love like that,” he continues, and if you could see him you think he might look dazed, off-kilter. You think he might be an avatar. Seokjin is prying his ribcage apart, unwrapping the barbed wire from his heart, saying I once was in love and this is all I know of it. “But, to me, in this life, it’s a prison. Once someone is willing to die for you, how do you keep them alive? How do you—I kissed that skin. I worshiped it. I pressed my lips to it with whatever softness was left in me. How do you look at that same skin and know you’re the reason it’s mangled?” He exhales, all tremor. “You can’t. You can’t.”
You know this all too well. You know what it feels like to look at Jimin and know, intrinsically and subconsciously, that you wouldn’t even hesitate. You’d take and give life to keep him alive and safe. You know that when you exit this world at someone else’s hand his face is the last thing you want to see.
You know it’s a liability.
You know it’s a target painted on your back. Between your eyes.
You know there’s nothing left to say, that this particular conversation has run its course. The two of you sit in an amicable silence, and you hope Seokjin can hear the life that surrounds you, however mundane. Hope he can hear the lángos vendor trying to hawk his goods; hope he can hear a city 8,000 kilometers away; hope he can hear these regular, everyday people going about their lives and remember there’s hope beyond his four walls.
I think you’d like it here, you think, but you don’t dare to say it aloud.
Time passes in a meaningless blur. Could be minutes, could be hours. No one’s come to kill you, so you reckon you’ve long since been in the clear. And maybe it speaks to Seokjin’s idea that love is a prison, because you know something’s happened to Jimin long before Seokjin speaks it into existence.
You’re up and out of the alleyway before you’re told to move. Have no idea where you’re going, but you’re racing through the streets of Budapest with a panic you haven’t ever felt in your life. Feels like quicksand; feels like molasses; feels like you have to wade through all the blood you’ve spilled, now congealed, to get to him.
“Where am I going?” you demand. Your lungs are on fire. In the split-second of silence it becomes a desperate scream. “Seokjin, tell me where the fuck I’m going!”
“The—fuck, the wa-warehouse up on your right.” You can’t think about why he’s crying. “I don’t—I don’t know wha-what’s there, you need to be careful. Please, you have to—”
Twenty seconds and you’ll be there, you’ll be with Jimin, you just need to keep running. You need to keep your head on straight. Remember your training. Remember you’ve built a life in a viper pit.
A man in a uniform is unloading a shipment around the back of the building. Faces away from you, bent at the waist. Takes very little effort to smash his head into the stone exterior and knock him unconscious, pocket his badge. You can’t get stupid now. Tell Seokjin to make sure all the cameras are cut, ask what floor when you shut yourself inside the freight elevator, unwilling to take the stairs and run into anyone who might be waiting. All the way to the top, he says, so all the way to the top you go.
Over the course of your life, you’ve made peace with death. Have stared it in the eye more times than you can count. Have dealt it out, evaded it, shook its hand.
You are wholly unprepared for the sight that greets you.
Red. Everything is red—the walls, the floor, what used to be a beautiful parquet pattern in the wood. In the center of the room: two bodies, maybe three. Not much that’d be able to identify them beyond a pile of teeth, no saying whose is whose. Slaughterhouse scraps.
And this is not—Jimin doesn’t work this way. Isn’t his MO. Jimin’s kills are elegant and neat, topped with a bow. What you see before you is ultraviolence. It is unhinged, it is fury, it is a complete loss of control. It’s what love looks like to Jimin, because he sits at the very edge of a rotted chair, legs crossed. Face streaked with blood, clothes covered in it.
“Jimin,” you say, because what else is there?
He tilts his head to the side, smirks a little, looks at you beneath his lashes. Eyes that used to find you across a room and calm you. Eyes that have locked onto you in the throes of pleasure. Eyes you’ve seen yourself reflected in, bathed in love and adoration.
Eyes that now contain nothing.
“Jimin, what the fuck happened?”
He removes his gloves with his teeth and doesn’t flinch away from the taste of iron. “They said they hurt you,” he states simply, “so I did what needed to be done.”
“What—” Nausea claws at your throat; for the first time, it’s all too much. This isn’t Jimin. This isn’t your Jimin, who smiled as you posed him against apricot walls in Copenhagen, who took a bullet to the stomach to protect you and never, ever told you. This is not the Jimin who wasted the last of his goodwill on loving you. “What did you do?” you whisper.
He rises to full height and it makes you flinch. You are scared of Jimin for the first time in your life: scared of who he is in this moment, what he’s capable of. And he sees it, lets that brand of anguish overtake him. Reaches for you before he decides against it and lets his hand drop to his side. Says, “I would never hurt you,” as if the words could brand themselves into your skin so you’d never forget.
“No, you’d just—” You squeeze your eyes shut. Don’t think about how one of the men nearly embedded into the floor was the one trailing you earlier.
Instead, you think about Seokjin: Once someone is willing to die for you, how do you keep them alive? You think about: How do you look at that same skin and know you’re the reason it’s mangled? You think about: In this life, it’s a prison.
You drop to your knees. Let the blood seep through your clothes and into your skin, undeserving of shying away from it.
Namjoon should’ve let you go.
You think about the men in front of you. Who they were, who they loved. The grief all of this is going to leave behind, and it becomes impossible to breathe. You grasp at your throat, think about all the times you’ve been strangled and who’d been there to cut the rope. There is no limit to Jimin’s devotion, and you understand now, how it drove Yoongi to madness. How he loved someone so much he would’ve retrieved their corpse from a building and how that same person can no longer bear to look at the damage they’d caused.
“This isn’t love, Jimin,” you choke out.
He stands in front of you. Stigmata. You’re worshiping at the altar of some kind of devil. At least his hands are clean when he places his fingers beneath your chin, forces you to look up at him. “What is it, then?”
“Destruction.”
A quiet huff of cruel laughter. “See, this is the difference between me and you, darling.” He takes back his hand, runs it through his blood-streaked hair, and your chin sags to your chest without his support. “Because I already knew that. Because I have destroyed myself every single day loving you.” He squats down, eye-level, and he says, “I need you to listen to me when I say this, sweetheart: you do not love me the way I love you, because I would do worse. When it comes to you, there is nothing on this earth I would not destroy to keep you safe.”
He clears his throat. Collects whatever’s in his mouth and spits onto one of the bodies. “If this is enough to have you tucking your fucking tail between your legs, then go, because this doesn’t even scratch the fucking surface.”
You can’t bring yourself to say anything, and sometimes that says it all.
Jimin presses a kiss to the top of your head. Makes a call. Cleaners will be here soon, he says, better get going.
You watch him go.
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[ 37.5665° N, 126.9780° E | Seoul, SOUTH KOREA ]
Jimin’s hair is black when Namjoon calls the meeting.
He takes the seat across from Namjoon’s desk because they don’t meet like this often. Assignments are usually manila folders slipped under doors, hushed whispers in hallways confirmed with a nod or a text on a burner phone. Assignments are not last-minute assemblies in conference rooms and offices.
But the way Namjoon is looking at him, with his clenched jaw and a gaze that’s meant to look barbed to anyone who doesn’t actually know him—Jimin doesn’t need to ask what this is about.
Had he bothered to look, he would’ve known by the way you stood in the far corner of the room, face obscured by the mid-afternoon shadows. Yoongi’s close to you, for some reason: dressed head to toe in black, perched on a lateral file cabinet, using a metal corner to sharpen his switchblade. Just like a harbinger of death. Some sort of fucked up omen, a warning that’s come too late.
Didn’t I tell you this would end badly, he hears Yoongi taunt in his head. This is what happens when you lay with trash.
Easy for Yoongi to say when he doesn’t know what it means to be cared for by you. Doesn’t know how it feels to give in to the freefall and plummet at your feet, stripped back and laid bare. Doesn’t know how it feels to kiss secrets into your skin like constellations, to map his tongue along every unspoken confession.
Easy for Yoongi to say, because he doesn’t have to survive the aftermath. Doesn’t have to feel the heartbreak, the agony of having you and watching as you slip through his fingers. Yoongi doesn’t have to struggle just to breathe, doesn’t have to endure the nights staring at the ceiling, watching as the daylight creeps into the corners of his vision. Doesn’t have to watch you looking so unaffected.
“Jimin.” Namjoon’s tone is flat, needlelike.
Behind him, Yoongi chuckles lowly. “What?” Jimin asks, his gaze trained on the painting behind Namjoon’s head. Looks like one he’d seen in Berlin, the time the two of you had gone just because and spent an afternoon ducking in and out of museums to escape the rain.
When he closes his eyes, he still sees the raindrops stuck to your eyelashes. The beads of water rolling off the sleeves of your leather jacket. How blinding your smile had been. The laughter in your voice as you ordered beer after beer after beer for the two of you in flawless Berlinisch. A brief, fleeting glimpse at normalcy. At the kind of life the two of you could have if you were just… different. Lived different lives. Were different people.
“You’ve gotten sloppy.”
Namjoon’s words are a cold bucket of water. Snap him back to reality, yank him back to the present where he’s forced to leave those river-lined streets behind. You’re silent and Yoongi’s still snorting laughter. “Okay,” is all Jimin can bring himself to say.
Jin had gotten sloppy once, too, and Namjoon stuck him down in the basement to work logistics. Might not be so bad, Jimin reckons. He’d be away from you, spared of this fucking misery. “So you know that’s unacceptable.”
Jimin just shrugs, resigned to his fate, whatever it may be. “I’m reassigning the both of you,” Namjoon continues. “You’ll both have new partners for your next assignments, since you clearly can no longer be trusted together.”
“Who?” Jimin manages to choke out.
Namjoon raises an eyebrow, clearly having expected an argument. “You’re being sent to Shanghai with Jungkook. You,” he says, turning his attention to you, “are going to Moscow with Taehyung.”
She’s fond of Taehyung, Jimin wants to say. But you’d been fond of him too, once upon a time, and that’d only ended in heartbreak, so who fucking cares.
They’re cruel, the tricks Jimin’s mind plays on him. How he convinces himself you look pained. How his fingers wring together at the thought of entrusting his life in the hands of someone else, someone new. At your life being just as at stake; at Taehyung being tasked with keeping you alive. Would you die for him, too, the way you’d always told Jimin you would for him? Would Taehyung take a bullet to the stomach to keep you safe the way Jimin had?
Even more cruel is the way you scoff, pushing yourself off of the wall as you fold your arms across your chest and say, “That’s bullshit, Kim Namjoon.”
No one talks to Namjoon that way except you.
Yoongi’s knife stops twirling. Just like a bird sensing a storm, senses on high-alert as he flicks his gaze over to you. “I’m sorry?” Namjoon says. “What part of Jimin losing his mind and nearly outing all of us seems like bullshit to you?”
“Hm, let me think,” you retort, a manicured finger tapping against the hollow of your cheek. “The part where you’re reassigning me for someone else’s mistake?”
Which part was the mistake? Jimin wants to ask. Needs to know how much you regret. Was sleeping with you the mistake? Falling in love with you? Getting too caught up in all these daydreams and letting reality get away from him?
“This organization is more important than Park Jimin getting his goddamn dick wet,” Namjoon snaps. “Keeping all of you safe—keeping you alive—is more—”
You scoff. Take an entire container of gasoline and pour it right on top of Namjoon’s flammable ire. “Then perhaps you’d be so kind as to explain to me why Min fucking Yoongi can fuck damn near everyone in this establishment, yet I have to sit here and listen to your goddamn mouth—”
Jimin doesn’t think Yoongi even knows his arm is moving.
There’d just been the trading of barbed words. His own name being spoken into the ether. Yoongi’s arm moving away from his body, switchblade clasped tightly between his fingers as he plunges it into your flesh.
Jimin watches it puncture your arm in slow motion. Feels the bile in his throat, the heat in his belly. Looks first at Namjoon whose jaw has gone slack, skin pale, as he stammers over words that won’t come. Then he looks at Yoongi—expects to find shock or guilt but finds only a muted disinterest and flared nostrils.
Finally, he looks at you. Watches the white cotton sleeve of your shirt slowly turn red and sticky-wet. Watches as your lips move around syllables and vowels and consonants Jimin can’t decipher.
“—fucking piece of shit, this is my favorite shirt! I’ll never get all this goddamn blood out of it—”
Jimin thinks he hears Yoongi say you deserve it. But Jimin isn’t really thinking much as he clambers out of his chair and moves in Yoongi’s direction. Doesn’t think at all as he lets instinct take over, lets adrenaline steer him headfirst into yet another bad idea.
He’s always known there’d come a day he’d be face-to-face with the sight of your blood. Had always known it’d come from someone else’s hand. Had always promised himself that hurting you would be the last thing anyone ever did.
Jimin has his fingers wrapped around Yoongi’s throat and he finally understands it—the joy Yoongi finds in taking life.
“What’s the matter, Jimin-ah?” Yoongi taunts. Jimin tightens his grip. Suddenly hates that fucking scar across Yoongi’s eye. “You’re never on clean-up duty. Always make your girlfriend do the dirty work. Finally grew some fucking balls, huh?”
“Fuck you,” Jimin says stupidly. Can’t think of anything more to say. Not that he needs to. Wrapping your hands around someone’s throat sends enough of a message, he thinks.
Namjoon’s still tongue-tied as you yank Yoongi’s blade from your arm, immediately pressing your other hand over the wound to stem the bleeding. The sight of your blood is making Jimin dizzy; the smell of the iron hanging in the air. All he wants to do is choke the life out of the man in front of him, but more than that, he just wants to hold your hand. Wants to comfort you, even though he knows you don’t need it. Not from him, not from anyone, but he still wants to. Wants to press his lips to the sweat at your brow.
And Yoongi can see it, too, because he starts laughing. It’s an odd, fractured noise. Jimin isn’t sure if he’s ever heard him laugh before, decides he also hates the way it sounds. Feels all wrong watching it leave his crooked smirk. Makes Jimin’s stomach plummet to the ground.
“Oh, you’re fucked, aren’t you?” Yoongi teases around Jimin’s slackened grip. “You weren’t just fucking her, you’re in love with her.”
Weird how Jimin is the one with his hands around someone’s neck and feels like he’s the one suffocating.
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[ 31.2304° N, 121.4737° E | Shanghai, CHINA ]
Jimin watches the life drain from an innocent woman’s face and feels nothing.
Jimin watches Jungkook cut a man down and feels even less.
When it’s over, he cleans up wordlessly and doesn’t eat for three days.
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[ 37.5665° N, 126.9780° E | Seoul, SOUTH KOREA ]
Jimin’s hair has faded to brown by the time he returns from Shanghai.
The more complicated job had gone to you and Taehyung. Jimin had tried not to take it personally. The Russian hits are always unnecessarily violent and Jungkook still isn’t fully trained. There’s still a phantom pain in Jimin’s stomach that warns him of the consequences of taking on more than he can chew. So, sure, Shanghai had gone fine, but his mind had been nearly 7,000 kilometers away the entire time.
Good thing he’d returned to Seoul unscathed, too, because he’s sure Namjoon would’ve eliminated him without a moment’s hesitation if he’d fucked up again.
But Shanghai had only served to prove the leader right. Jimin can’t work with you anymore. Can’t focus, can’t stomach the violence, can’t keep his goddamn head on straight.
He sighs as he glances at Jungkook to his right. Jimin had watched him murder two men in cold blood not even thirty-six hours ago and now he’s doe-eyed and sucking down his third banana milk of the morning. It really makes his head spin, being paired with this grown-up infant of a man now instead of you, but for all of Jungkook’s apparent shortcomings, he’d kept Jimin alive. He isn’t dead.
And then you walk in with Taehyung and he wishes he was.
Because you’re laughing and Taehyung’s got his arm slung around your shoulder and you look happy. It’s the kind of happiness that should be contagious, bloom warmth in his chest, but it doesn’t. It just takes the last frayed strand of hope he has and sets flame to it.
You don’t look like you miss Jimin at all. Don’t look like you’ve lost sleep or skipped meals.
“Didn’t take you long, did it?” Jimin says, because he’s wounded and lashing out. Not because he means it.
You must know he doesn’t, too, because you don’t react. “Watch your mouth, Park Jimin,” Taehyung warns, because he doesn’t know, and this only sets Jimin off more. You don’t need defending. Or had you, and Jimin had simply thought it wasn’t his place to provide it? That you wouldn’t want it?
“Or what, Kim Taehyung?”
Taehyung is cherubic. It’s part of his charm, one of many reasons why he’s so effective. If you’re looking to die, you look for the guy who looks like Yoongi, not the one who smiles wide and warm like Taehyung. So when he sets his jaw and pokes his tongue into his cheek and says, “Or I’ll cut your fucking head off, you stupid fuck,” your attention is finally piqued.
“I’m so sick of this,” Jungkook wails, banana milk tossed carelessly in the trash. “All of you need to get your fucking shit together!”
Taehyung rolls his eyes at the same time you pretend to inspect your nails. “Is that why you’re so temperamental, Chim?” Taehyung prods, looking every bit the pretentious, murderous angel he is. “Because you got sent to China on a babysitting mission while the grownups did real work?”
“Fuck you,” Jungkook snaps, rising to full height. “I’m not a fucking child.”
“Oh? Could’ve fooled me.” Taehyung’s words are razor-sharp and smell like kerosene. “Tell me, then: were you on babysitting duty? Had to look after our precious little Jiminie while he nursed his broken heart?”
You sigh, full of faux-exasperation, and place a gentle hand on Taehyung’s forearm. Dig your nails in just enough to be a warning, and if Jimin hadn’t been looking he’d miss it: the way Taehyung deflates instantly, anger dissipating like smoke, back in control. Just because you’d touched him. Just because you were there. Jimin knows that touch, how it feels to be under your control, and it makes his chest ache. Makes everything feel like it’s sitting wrong in his stomach, and he’s either going to be sick all over Namjoon’s overpriced fucking rug or wrap his hands around Taehyung’s throat the way he’d done to Yoongi.
He’s out of his goddamned mind; he feels untethered. Helpless. Like it was always going to end like this, and maybe Jimin knew that and had just ignored it. Maybe now he’s paying the price—maybe he’s finally found something he can’t afford.
Jungkook’s still going off, nasty gaze set on Taehyung because he’s the only one playing along. They’re exchanging words Jimin can’t make heads nor tails of. Words he doesn’t care about. Words that ring empty and hollow because they sound nothing like the way you say his name. Shapeless, unlike the way your lips move around those syllables.
“Jimin,” you say, the sound finally registering and bringing him back down to earth. All he can do is stare. “Can we talk?” Taehyung and Jungkook are still trading barbs.
Wonders how he got here. Looks around the room and wonders if each and every one of them is destined for this same fate, this madness. Wants to tell you why he forgot his vest, why he was three hours late in Argentina. Wants to grovel and beg and leave this place and never look back.
More than anything, he wants to know what it feels like to actually be human.
So he shakes his head. Tries not to be haunted by the way your face falls at the rejection.
There is a scar on his abdomen and a scar on your arm that both tell the same story. There is a man in the basement who is in love with a man above ground and is too weighed down by guilt to do anything about it. There is a man here who plays god, has soldiers to do his bidding, and there is very little here that Jimin has only for himself.
The two of you will have that conversation, but he needs to be human, first.
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[ 34.6901° N, 135.1956° E | Kobe, JAPAN ]
This is a waste of your fucking time.
Whatever Namjoon had thought would be here doesn’t seem to exist. Yoongi can barely tolerate you on a good day, threatens to stick a dagger in your neck at least twice an hour, but the more time the two of you waste chasing ghosts, the closer he comes to unraveling entirely.
“Stop fucking staring at me,” he snaps, blowing the smoke of his cigarette right in your face.
You tut. “But you’re so beautiful, Yoongi, I just can’t help it.”
He digs his switchblade from his boot. Makes a show of flipping it open. “I can cut your fuckin’ eyes out of your skull,” he intones. “Maybe that’ll help.”
In your ear, Jimin’s laughter rings like crystal.
Ricochets off of all the corners of Seokjin’s basement, makes the echo sound warped through the earpiece. “Please tell Yoongi-ssi to keep an eye on the man with the shaved head. In front of him, roughly sixty degrees to his right.”
You relay the message. Watch as Yoongi transforms—sharpened gaze, rigid posture, disappears into the shadows. More apex predator than man. “And me?” you ask.
“Backup,” comes Seokjin’s voice. “We haven’t found your mark yet.”
You hum. Pick up the cigarette Yoongi left behind and stick it between your lips. Smoke it nearly to the filter. “You got it, boss,” you tease, just because it flusters him.
“I’m—that’s not—knock it off.”
Exhale. Stub out the cigarette. Butt in your pocket. “Anything else?”
“Yeah,” Jimin says, and his voice is soft, sounds like spun sugar. “Stay alive, all right?”
Jimin’s hair isn’t dyed at all.
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if you've read this far: thank you so, so much! i am more appreciative than i can put into words. this is very different from what i typically write, but i hope you enjoyed it nonetheless.
i would love to hear your thoughts if you have any. &lt;3
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bangtanficsforyou · 4 months
Text
They Reject You (maknae line)-03
Pairing: maknae line x reader (fuckboi! Jimin x Reader, Co-worker Taehyung x Reader, Idol Jungkook x Reader)
Warnings: swear words here and there.
Word count: 20K (approx)
A/N: long long long asf! (There's author's note at the bottom too).
Park Jimin
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Jimin may have been very determined while pledging that he will make things right but right now, he's utterly confused and clueless. 
How exactly does he make things right?
If he were to go by the way movies suggest, he should be sending you chocolates and bouquets of flowers. But the question is, will that do? Will that be enough? Can hurting someone emotionally be fixed by something material?
He doesn't know.
Oh, that's another thing. In recent days, Jimin's mind has been throwing questions at him which he has no answers to. Which, needless to mention, has been frustrating him to no end.
He feels like there's a lot he needs to figure out before taking any action. Because lord knows he doesn't want to mess up again and given his history he has a habit of doing exactly that over and over again. 
The question that has been bugging him the most is; why does he even want to fix things with you? 
It's a question Jimin wholeheartedly avoids thinking about. Because he doesn't have an answer and thinking about this particular question makes him feel a little too uncomfortable.
However, to him, the question also feels like a big empty blank that he needs to fill in order to make sense of what he should do next. Almost as if, if he figures out this one thing, he will have all his answers. 
Which again, doesn't make sense to him. How can figuring out one thing give answers to the rest? But again, he should begin somewhere. Which obviously isn't going to be answering the big question.
Hence he does what he has been doing for the past few days; searching for ways to apologise on YouTube.
It's quite obvious that his YouTube searches haven't been very successful. But in his defence, it isn't Jimin's fault. It's YouTube's.
Almost every video that YouTube suggests as a response to his search, has this implication that the girl being apologised to, is the lover of the person seeking forgiveness.  
Huh? 
But that's so not the case. You're not his lover.
At some point, Jimin got so frustrated that he went on a mini rant to Taehyung, about how this is the 21st century and how a boy and girl need not always have a romantic relationship. And it's while he's ranting via text that he is hit by the brilliant idea of inviting Taehyung over. After all, if there's someone who's better than Jimin when it comes to the ladies, it's Taehyung. 
Half an hour later, Jimin couldn't rush to the door any faster when the bell rang. 
Taehyung greets the troubled boy with a scoff of disbelief. "Never seen you this excited over my arrival, ever."
Jimin is the least bit interested in paying attention to his best friend's teasing. "You gotta help me. It's already been three days and I haven't been able to figure anything out."
"It's about making up to that girl, right?" On receiving a nod from Jimin, Taehyung continues, "What was her name again?"
"Y/N."
"Right, Y/N," Taehyung makes a note to himself, having a hunch it's a name he will hear quite often. "So where exactly are you stuck?" 
Jimin leads his friend to the couch so that Taehyung can have a look at the screen. "Just look at the results. There are literally thousands of responses but not one that's of use. What's the point of having internet if it can't help you when you need?!"
Taehyung snickers. "Yeah, you did go on a half an hour rant about it via text."
Jimin huffs at the way Taehyung seems to not share the same level of frustration as him. But alas, maybe him being in a light mood is a good thing after all. That way Taehyung can think optimally and come up with a solution and then Jimin can finally have a good night's sleep. 
Gosh when Jimin thinks about it, it sends shivers down his spine. He really needs to sleep. 
"Great! You know all about it, so now get on with it," Jimin speaks with a firm nod of determination and turns his body ninety degrees so that he is entirely facing Taehyung. 
And then just keeps staring. 
Taehyung stares back for a second or two and then bursts out laughing. He laughs so hard, that his ears miss the questions Jimin throws his way, querying about the cause of his laughter. He laughs so hard, that he has to place a pillow against his stomach because it has started hurting. He laughs so hard that it takes him a total of five minutes to stop. 
When he does stop laughing, he utters a sentence that sends Jimin into a similar laughter fit. 
"You're so in love."
Or maybe wait. 
Jimin doesn't laugh. 
Jimin blinks at Taehyung blankly and then scoffs in annoyance. Taehyung can't be serious. "I can't believe you're in the mood of making jokes when I'm so stressed."
"Oh, I can assure you, I'm not joking," Taehyung shakes his head with a chuckle, denying Jimin's words. "You're definitely in love."
Jimin pauses. He doesn't like how sure Taehyung seems to be of his words. It makes Jimin realise that Taehyung isn't joking. Taehyung really thinks Jimin is in love. 
Huh. 
"Don't you think I'd know if I was in love?" 
Taehyung snorts. "Clearly not."
Now Jimin's curious. "What makes you so sure of your words?"
"Hmm, let's think for a moment," Taehyung responds, pretending to think deeply for a moment. "You have been worried sick, haven't been behaving like yourself and are throwing tantrums like a five-year-old kid. All because a girl hasn't been talking to you–"
"That could simply mean she's a very good friend to me," Jimin counters even before Taehyung can finish his sentence. 
"Well, you don't kiss your friends while drunk." 
Jimin shuts up at that, not because he agrees with Taehyung's statement but because he needs a moment to figure out what to reply to that. He needs to think of something that is a justifiable reason for why he had kissed you in his drunken state of mind. 
Unfortunately, the best he comes up with is; "I didn't know what I was doing. I was drunk. Plus, me kissing someone shouldn't be news, drunk or not." 
Taehyung nods. "Right, that's your thing. Kissing and sleeping around."
For the first time in his life, Jimin feels an odd sensation in his chest at the mention of his player lifestyle. He can't place why (another thing he can't figure out, yes) but for the first time he wishes these words were not used to describe him. But admittedly, that's who he is. It's only normal to describe him by who he is. 
Jimin keeps quiet as a sign of letting Taehyung know that he can go on. 
"But surprisingly enough, since Y/N has stopped talking to you, you haven't fooled around with anyone," Taehyung squints his eyes, looking like a detective who's trying to solve a complicated riddle. "Wonder why that might be." 
Jimin misses the sarcastic tone completely because he's taken aback by his friend's words. It's only now that he realises that he indeed, has not fooled around with anyone in the last week or so. 
It's true that he has been going to parties and have been getting drunk and have been doing what he usually does. Except for one thing, it seems. Hooking up. 
Oddly enough, the thought of hooking up with someone didn't even occur to him. It's not like he restrained himself or something. It's like he forgot that aspect of his life, entirely. 
What the fuck.
Taehyung silently watches the realisation play out on Jimin's face. It's entertaining, to say the least. His sweet fuckboy of a friend is in love and has zero clue about it. How sweet. 
He only hopes Jimin comes to his senses while this denial is still sweet and not when it's all bitter and sour. But looking at the way Jimin is struggling, one thing is for sure and that is, he isn't going to get his 'happy realisation' just yet. 
"Your bulb will take time to light up," Taehyung interrupts Jimin's thoughts, "Let me just help you with the apologising thing."
---------------------------------------------------------------
Jimin has been standing in front of your door for five minutes now. With a huge flower bouquet at that. Because according to Taehyung:
"It's not what you give that matters, it's the thought you put into it. It could be flowers, it could be chocolates–yes I know, at the end of the day they are mere materials. But what's wrong with that?
You've gotta start somewhere. What's important is that you show her that you have realised your mistake, you're sorry and that you'd never do something like that ever again. Sending gifts is not all. It might not earn you her forgiveness but it shows that you're trying and that's something." 
Hence, despite not considering sending gifts as an option at first, here Jimin is, doing exactly that. But then it's not like he could come up with a better idea himself and he thinks Taehyung is right, he should at least start somewhere. 
But he wanted to make it as meaningful as he could. Which is why he did a little research and showed up here himself. He needs to do just one last thing, press the calling bell. 
He sighs and tells himself that there's no point in delaying it, the sooner he does it, the better. Plus, it only means that he will be able to see you after another three-day stretch. 
The thought of seeing you again, does it for him. He presses the bell and with a bated breath, waits for you to open the door. 
Thankfully, he doesn't have to wait long. You swing the door open and Jimin is relieved that your reaction on seeing him is that of surprise and not that of disdain. He would have run in the opposite direction and would have been too ashamed to face you had that been the case. 
Despite not running away, Jimin seems to have lost his capability to talk, for all he does is stare at your face. It gets to the point where you have to be the one to ask him what he's doing at your doorstep. 
Jimin looks away as soon as he snaps out of it and remembers what he's here for. He still doesn't speak and just pushes the bouquet in his hands towards you and urges you to take it. 
It's not like you hadn't noticed the bouquet, it's unmissable really. It's this big, gorgeous arrangement of pink roses and the lighting of the hallway falls on the flowers in a way that makes it look like a portrait. When Jimin tries handing over the bouquet to you, you're once again taken by surprise and out of instinct you take hold of the bouquet without a second thought. 
The moment Jimin knows that you have the bouquet, he takes a few steps back, bows to you and takes off. 
Well, guess he did run away, after all. 
You don't even get the time to question him as to why the sudden flowers as you stand there for a moment until you're sure that Jimin isn't coming back. With a confused sigh, you head back into your apartment. 
"I should put them in water," you mumble to yourself and rest the bouquet on your centre table. 
However, it's at this very moment that your eyes land on a piece of paper that seems to have been folded with great care and has been kept in such a way that it isn't visible from the front but only from the top. 
With a small frown of curiosity, you take the paper out with your fingers. On unfolding, you find a small printed note on the left side and a handwritten note on the right. 
The left side of the note read: "Pink roses signify gratitude, admiration and appreciation." 
The right side of the note read: "You're not the stupid one, I am."
There's a brief moment where you are clueless and you have to think as to what Jimin could possibly mean. However, it doesn't take long for you to figure it out as you're hit with the memory of letting Jimin know how he has made you feel for a very, very long time. 
One particular line sticks out and you have a hunch that his note refers to that.
"I felt so stupid to be hanging out with you when you couldn’t even pause and give me the minimum respect I deserve.”
Huh. 
Is...Is Jimin apologising? 
No way. 
After that day you had thought Jimin would either just stop talking to you or would just show up a few days later as if nothing ever happened. Never had you considered that he would choose to apologise. But apparently, that's exactly what he has decided on. 
Wow. This is way more surprising than the sun rising in the west. 
You do not doubt that he must have taken the help of some of his friends but that's only fair. You can imagine how hard it must be for someone like Jimin to apologise to someone. 
You shake your head in amusement and bring a vase filled with water to place the flowers in. 
Honestly, you hadn't thought much about Jimin since that day. The way you felt lighter after saying what you had wanted to for a long time, was incredibly freeing. You were also proud of yourself for finally standing up and for sticking to your decision to cut him off. It made you wish you had done it sooner. 
But now that Jimin is apologising, in his own way, you are a tad bit surprised that it doesn't throw you into a mental debate. That you don't have to battle yourself on what to do. 
Things are pretty clear in your head. 
You forgive Jimin. 
You had forgiven him long before he even sent you the flowers. With your bottled-up emotions out of the way, it gave you the clarity you needed to see things for how they were. 
You had always had a weak spot for Jimin. Jimin, not so much. You were just another girl to him. But the thing with having weak spots is that they make you vulnerable. 
But Jimin is Jimin. He has no clue about these kind of things. Does he? For you, to expect Jimin to understand the sensitivity of the matter, was basically setting yourself up for disappointment from the get-go. 
It's the same as looking for a mango in a banyan tree. It's fruitless. 
That does not mean, that you blame yourself. When emotions that are beyond your control, get involved, the practical mind is forced to take a back seat. Romantic affection is for sure one such feeling where one tends to lose their thinking and decision-making capabilities. 
You forgive Jimin. You also forgive yourself. 
Does that mean you'd be okay with being friends with Jimin, again? No, you cannot bring yourself to do that. 
The trust and faith you had put in him has been broken and that's enough of a reason for you to move on. 
So what is Jimin to you, now? 
Someone you still have a weak spot for because it's not like you wake up one day and suddenly all your feelings you harboured for a person disappears. But you know you want to move on. You know you do not wish to go back to sharing the same dynamic with Jimin ever again. 
And this time your decision does not come from a place of hurt, anger or frustration. This time it comes from a place of clarity and acceptance, which is also why it doesn't seem difficult to follow through with your choice. 
Nevertheless, you do appreciate Jimin giving you flowers. Although, you think there was no need for it. 
For a brief moment, you contemplate if you should be texting a thank you to him but then decide otherwise when you remember that you have blocked him. Even if it's for the short span of two minutes to send a text, you don't think you're ready to unblock him just yet. 
For the time being you simply settle for putting the vase at the top of one of your drawers and taking good care of them. 
----------------------------------------------------------------
The next day it was a bouquet of white flowers with a note that read: 
I'm sorry; on the left and I know flowers won't earn me your forgiveness but I'm trying; on the right.
It once again was Jimin at your doorstep and once again, before you could say anything, he had decided his job was done as soon as the flowers were in your hands. 
You were too flabbergasted as you had thought that the whole giving you flowers thing was only a one-time thing. You didn't think Jimin would show up for a second time, just the day after, to give you another massive bouquet. 
Maybe you should have seen the same thing happening on the third day but somehow you didn't and were just as surprised, if not more, when Jimin showed up with another bouquet on the third day. 
Before you could say anything, Jimin was gone. 
Which is exactly why you now find yourself unblocking his contact. 
You: hey
You: just letting you know I appreciate the flowers but you do not need to send them anymore 
You: I forgive you
Jimin is on the phone with Taehyung getting an earful about his cowardness and running, when he receives your text.
"I'm telling you, this flower thing is not going to work. She hasn't even tried to talk to me" 
"From what I have heard you are the one who has never allowed her to even open her mouth and–"
"Hold on, someone texted me," Jimin interrupts Taehyung solely to avoid getting called out for the umpteenth time. However, his eyes almost fall out of his sockets when he sees that it's you. "Tae, Y/N texted me!"
Taehyung, too, is surprised to hear this. "What did she say?"
Jimin takes a deep breath, his nostrils flaring as he fills his lungs up with as much air as possible. "Right, I will open her messages." 
When he does read the words you have sent him, he is even more surprised. But even more so, he is relieved. Gosh, he feels like he could cry tears of joy. 
"She forgave me," Jimin speaks in a tone that is a little too loud for Taehyung's ears. 
However, Taehyung doesn't protest as his friend's words seem more important at the moment. "Are you serious? She did? What did she say?"
"She said that she appreciates the flowers and that I need not send them to her anymore and that she forgives me." 
Taehyung pauses for a moment and then grins brightly, the relieved and excited tone of his friend making him feel happy. "Then what are you doing fucker? Text her back, you idiot."
Jimin nods but then responds verbally when he remembers that Taehyung is over the phone and not with him in his room. "I'll text her back."
Saying so, he ends the call with Taehyung and starts typing. 
Jimin: Thank you
Wait. 
Thank you?
Should he say thank you? Is that the right response? But is sending a simple thank you good enough? 
He doesn't think so. 
Quickly deleting the typed words, he begins to think of a better response. 
If not thank you, then what? How about 'How have you been?' No, no, no. That sounds way too casual. 
He should send something that appears to be cool and that doesn't make things awkward. At the same time, he should text something that leaves room for a conversation. A proper one. 
Geez, texting is difficult. 
What if he tries teasing you like he did before everything happened? No, that would make it look like he never took the matter seriously. 
Should he...should he just be uncool and be honest for once? 
Should he just let you know that he feels like a bag of stones has been lifted off his chest and that he can breathe again? That he feels like he can think properly, again? 
That might be too much. 
But maybe he can just try letting you know that he's incredibly grateful for your forgiveness without sounding cheesy? Yeah, he can definitely do that. 
Jimin: Thank you.
Jimin: that word isn't enough but that's the best I have got 
Jimin: I am incredibly grateful and I promise I won't make you regret your choice. 
When you read his texts a few minutes later, you're rather surprised. Is Jimin saying these things? There's no way. 
But then you come to a conclusion that, there indeed is no way. Jimin must have made a friend of his type out these words. Now, that makes a whole lot of sense. 
You chuckle at the thought and react to his messages with a thumbs up and leave it at that. 
The moment Jimin sees you reacting to his messages, he types out another message, one that he has delicately crafted in his mind. Something light that hopefully will lead to a proper conversation.
Jimin: How have you been? 
Your phone pings and you notice Jimin's text. Something uncomfortable churns in your stomach at his words. Jimin most likely thinks things are back to normal and that you two will once again bicker and joke around in no time.
Guess, you need to break it to him. 
You: I've been fine 
You: but I would rather have us not go back to the way we were 
Jimin is already in the middle of forming another text that conveys that things won't be the same and that he'd do better but his heart literally breaks into pieces when he reads the next text. 
You: I don't think we should be in contact anymore 
You: it's a proven fact it doesn't do either of us any good 😂
You: especially me.
—--------------------------------------------------------
Jimin has decided to watch a movie. Not just any movie, the fault in our stars. Because he needs something to make him feel sad. Correction; he needs something that he is consciously aware of, to make him feel sad. 
It's much much more annoying when you get sad and heartbroken over something and yet you cannot explain why you feel that way. Imagine suddenly getting stabbed by invisible knives that you can't see but can only feel. Yeah, it feels the same. 
But who cares anyway? Jimin is watching a movie that will make him plenty sad and unlike you, it won't have him feeling like someone who hasn't been in touch with his emotions for ages. 
Taehyung munches on his popcorn slowly, his focus periodically shifting between Jimin and the TV screen. 
Taehyung knew something was up the moment Jimin texted him asking if he would like to watch The Fault in Our Stars. For the people who don't know, Jimin does not watch sad movies, like ever. Because irrespective of how much of a fuckboy he is, he is a huge softie on the inside (which is actually very cliche of him). But as his fuckboy-ness would have it, he absolutely hates crying. 
Taehyung does not believe that Jimin does not cry or that he tries to keep his tears at bay. Because from the few times that he has seen his friend crying, he knows that he isn't someone who's good at holding his tears back. So no, Jimin does cry and when he does, he cries like a baby. However, what Jimin ensures is that he does not cry in front of anyone.
But here's Jimin, crying in front of Taehyung. 
This boy is going to give me a headache, Taehyung thinks with a deep inhale as he once again shifts his focus from Jimin to the screen.
It must have been another fifteen minutes or so when he hears a small sniffle coming from his left. Huh, things haven't even turned that sad in the movie yet. 
Taehyung looks at his friend only to realise his suspicions are right when he notices his friend subtly wiping under his eyes. 
Taehyung takes hold of the remote and switches the TV off. 
He has had enough. 
Jimin looks at Taehyung with perplexed features but before he can ask a question, Taehyung is getting up from his seat to turn the lights on. 
This makes Jimin quickly grab a few tissues and wipe at the corner of his eyes. 
Taehyung rolls his eyes in annoyance. "Sometimes I can't tell if you're a drama queen or a little kid." 
Jimin looks at Taehyung with a clueless expression. As long as he pretends he has no clue what Taehyung is talking about, it should be good. 
Taehyung simply scoffs and shakes his head in defeat. "Do you want to talk about it or should I just leave?" 
This has Jimin facing away from Taehyung and he scowls at the centre table. "I have nothing to talk about."
"Cool then, I have some important work to do, I'll get going." 
"Sure do that. Leave me. Everyone does, why shouldn't you?"
Ah. Drama queen, it is. 
"So what Y/N left? Like did she leave you on seen or something? Is that why you're so sad and upset?" Taehyung guesses the possible cause of Jimin's state from his words. 
Jimin wishes it was that simple. He honestly would give anything for Taehyung's words to be right, for that being the cause of his sadness. But if only.
Taehyung deduces that things might not be that simple when Jimin does not give a verbal answer and appears to become more sulky. 
Taehyung makes his way to the couch and claims his previous seat next to Jimin. "What will you take to just tell me what went wrong? I know you're dying to let it out."
Jimin looks at his friend for a moment then suddenly reaches out to grab his phone from the table. He opens your texts and just places his phone in Taehyung's hands. 
With a small concentrated frown, he takes a look at the screen and goes through the chats. 
"So this is what has gotten you like this," he mumbles to himself.  "Have you tried talking to her and telling her that you won't be repeating the same things again?" 
Jimin shakes his head. "She never gave me the chance to do so."
Taehyung hums, deep in thought. "What do you want to do now?" 
"I don't think it matters."
"It does. Now tell me what do you want?"
Jimin looks up at the ceiling with blurry eyes. "I think I want us to go back to the way we were."
Taehyung, although wanting to, does not show the disbelief he feels at Jimin's words. He keeps his composure calm so that Jimin does not feel uncomfortable. "What you're saying is you want to go back to the way you would annoy her and she would put up with it?"
Jimin's spirit lifts just a little bit when he remembers how things were before and he finds himself absentmindedly nodding. 
"Which would also mean going back to the way you would keep sleeping around with people and then at the same time would make flirty comments towards Y/N?" 
The tiny little corner of his mouth that had lifted, once again turns into a scowl as Taehyung's words register in his brain. It's as if he's knocked into his senses. 
Noticing that Taehyung has successfully managed to grab Jimin's attention, he hopes he can only make Jimin see his point. "Honestly, Jimin have you ever realised where you went wrong? Or did you apologise to her solely because you thought that was what she wanted and that would have her back in your life?" 
Questions. Another set of questions. Jimin could honestly scream. But something about Taehyung's gaze makes him unable to run away from the queries like he has been doing all this time.
He considers Taehyung's words for a moment and then mumbles in a small voice, "I don't know."
Taehyung hums, having guessed that answer. 
"I just wanted to apologise to her because I know I have hurt her," Jimin keeps his tone soft and vulnerable. "I may not know all the ways in which I have hurt her but I know I should have respected her wishes and should have stopped flirting with her when she had asked."
"I may not know exactly how or why it affected her but I know it led her to be angry–" Jimin breaks off suddenly when a thought occurs to him and soon he looks even more ashamed, "–and they say all anger stems from hidden pain. If that's true then I must have caused her pain."
Taehyung releases a breath he didn't know he was holding. He wonders how his friend can be both stupid and smart at the same time and why exactly does his brain start working when the damage has already been done. 
"So you realise that you have caused her some sort of pain?" 
"I must have," Jimin agrees. 
"Have you then tried figuring out what exactly she means to you?" 
Jimin's tears have dried, thanks to the ongoing conversation that has distracted him enough to have the wheels of his brain running again.  
"She's someone I care about a lot and someone I want in my life." 
"As a friend?" Taehyung pushes. 
Jimin nods. 
Taehyung hums, "I think you really need to sit with yourself and think things through." 
—-------------------------------------------------------
Jimin is dumb and Taehyung is loyal.
Which is why the latter finds himself in the middle of a party, waiting for you to arrive. 
A week of Jimin moping and being a sullen child, had Taehyung take matters into his own hands. Jimin could not possibly figure things out by himself even if everyone around him could. Taehyung only hopes he will admit what has been brewing for a long time, when his feelings smack him right across the face. 
Taehyung leans against the bar counter, his eyes hardly moving from the entrance as he waits for you to walk through the door. 
It takes about another fifteen minutes of his eyes locked on the door, for you to finally emerge. 
Taehyung relaxes a breath. He had to do a lot of digging to find a common friend and for him to convince that common friend to somehow convince you to come to the party. He wasn't sure if all of this would work, but now that you're here, success is a step closer. 
He gives you five minutes to say your hi's and hello's and then, he's making his way to you. 
"And you must be Y/N?" 
You look at the guy who seems to know you by your name and frown when you don't recall ever having interacted with him. "And you must be?"
"Taehyung. Kim Taehyung."
Your brain clicks in realisation. Taehyung, a name you have heard Jimin mention many times. However, this is the first time that you get to put a face to the said name. 
"I have heard of you," you nod as a feeling of reluctance takes over you. Why is Taehyung approaching you? 
He smiles. "I'm not surprised by that."
You return his smile awkwardly and wonder what you should be saying next. "How do you know me?" 
"Let's just say I have heard of you as well," his smile turns into a full-blown grin as if he's enjoying this. 
"From Jimin?" 
"Ah yes. We both have an idiot named Jimin in our lives."
You feel your traitor heart get curious at the confirmation. Taehyung knows of you from Jimin? Jimin talked about you to his friends? The thought of that catches you with surprise as you never thought you were ever important enough to him, for him to do that. You thought you were just another girl who fell for him. However, your curiosity is soon overtaken by the thought of him making light and fun of your feelings.
"That idiot, however, speaks highly of you, which is why I just could not miss the opportunity to speak to you," Taehyung quips, sensing the thoughts inside your head. 
You look at Taehyung, wondering what to make of his words. You just find it difficult to believe that Jimin speaks highly of you. One speaks highly of the people they respect and well—no, you don't want your mind to wander there.
"So you're here speaking to me, to verify the things Jimin has said about me?" You keep your tone light, playful and teasing, so as to not come off as rude. While, on the inside, you're really confused as fuck as to what to make out of this. Does Taehyung not know of the recent changes in the dynamics between you and Jimin? 
"Oh no, absolutely not," he shakes his head. "I do not doubt a thing Jimin has said about you. I'm only here out of sheer curiosity and with the intent to get to know you better."
And some ulterior purposes. That part he leaves unspoken. 
You observe him for a moment and relax a little when you realise that he seems genuine. You don't know, why he's here and what he wants from you, but you decide talking to him won't be of any harm.
—---------------------------------------------------------
Jimin is grumpy as fuck when he walks in and is greeted by the loud music that blasts through the speakers. Goodness, why did he enjoy partying, again? 
He really wouldn't be here had it not been for Taehyung's constant nagging that he had something important to say, and that couldn't be done unless he attended the party. 
Technically, his words made zero sense. Taehyung couldn't just say whatever important thing he had to say, over the phone? Apparently, according to him, he couldn't. 
He prays to whatever god is out there, for the sake of Taehyung that he finds him soon. 
The universe, however, has other plans. 
Jimjn spots you before he spots Taehyung. He sees you smiling wide and even in the dimmed lights, he can see the way your eyes shine with amusement and joy. As selfish as it is, Jimin feels any amount of hope he might have had, leave at the sight. You're clearly doing fine without him. A part of him wishes you weren't. 
It feels eerily similar to the time when he had spotted you on his way to class. 
But then he realises you are with a guy. A strange emotion fills him, one that he believes he hasn't felt before, ever. He realises he's jealous. He's so jealous of the lucky bastard who's getting to make you laugh and with whom you seem so comfortable with. With that jealousy, comes a huge wave of insecurity. The guy doesn't seem to have messed up like Jimin did. He doesn't seem to be someone you feel the need to cut off your life. All of which Jimin has done and is. 
However, when the light falls on the face of the said guy, Jimin is hit with a sense of anger and confirmation that the said guy is much, much better than Jimin is. 
Taehyung is smart, has a good sense of humour and surely knows more when it comes to matters of the heart. Whereas, Jimin has only been confused and no matter how hard he has tried, he has been unsuccessful in clearing up the cloud of confusion. 
For a brief moment, he is taken back to the words Taehyung had said to him–you're so in love–which Jimin had found utterly ridiculous at the time. However, now that he finds himself in the hold of jealousy and a brewing insecurity that only you hold the power to put a stop to, he doesn't find the idea as absurd. 
He's never been in love before. But somehow he is still hit with the realisation that all his desperation, anger, jealousy and insecurities stem from one thing and one thing only. His love for you. 
He is hit with more and more clarity with each passing moment as he stares at you. An overwhelming urge to make you his, washes over him and with strong, determined steps, he walks in the direction where you chat with Taehyung. 
The moment the two of you realise Jimin's presence, your smile falters whereas Taehyung's widens.
"Jimin," you whisper, caught completely off guard. 
"Y/N," he greets you back. "I wasn't expecting to see you here."
"Me neither," you mumble in a small voice. 
"How have you been?" 
Neither of you miss the fact that this was the very same question he had asked via text, to which you had made it clear that things would never be the same, instead of actually answering him. 
However, now that you both stand in front of each other, you think it would be incredibly rude to not answer him. "I'm fine." 
Your short answer leaves no further room for conversation and it's only when you realise that Jimin refuses to avert his eyes from you, that you ask him back the same question. 
"I've been anything but fine," Jimin answers, without missing a beat. 
His answer is similar to yours in terms of being short and vague. However, his response means exactly the opposite of yours. 
You stifle the question that's on the tip of your tongue and push away the overgrowing concern at his answer. This is exactly why you had chosen to end whatever friendship you two had over text. You were unsure of the feelings Jimin would stir within you. Sure, you have made the choice of moving on from him but there was no denying that you haven't moved on yet. 
You nod and think it would be best to include Taehyung in the conversation. He would surely know how to break the tension. However, you realise at the same time as Jimin does that Taehyung has disappeared into thin air. 
Taehyung's gone, you think with surprise and disbelief, having no clue when he left. 
Taehyung's gone, Jimin thinks, beaming with glee and satisfaction. 
"Do you want a drink?" Jimin asks, having no intention of leaving. 
"I could actually do with some alcohol," you mumble mainly to yourself, but somehow despite the loud music, Jimin manages to hear you. The very next moment he has two drinks in his hands and gracefully offers you one.
"I have a few things to say," he says after a few sips.
Oh god. Please be kind to my heart. You stay quiet. You were not prepared to face Jimin. After texting him that day, you had honestly thought that was it. It was hard for you to send him those words. So incredibly hard. But you knew it was for the best.  
A part of you had wished for Jimin to regret losing you. But you knew that thought to be impractical. You knew in reality, Jimin must have slipped into someone's bed instead of giving you a second thought. You had honestly thought Jimin's attempt at apologising with flowers was merely a result of his hurt to the ego. Nevertheless, you appreciate his effort and know better than to have any further expectations from the man. 
However, this is incredibly confusing. More so, because the Jimin who was sending you those flowers would run away right after he knew that the flowers had reached their destination. However, this Jimin, stands in front of you with eyes locked with yours, refusing to back down. 
"I had sent those flowers to you, because I knew I had to apologise. I knew I messed up. I knew I hurt you. Don't get me wrong, the knowledge that I had hurt you was enough of a slap on my face, but I didn't know what it felt like for you," he takes a pause, "but now I do."
Jimin is aware that comparing what he has put you through with what he felt for merely a few minutes after seeing you with Taehyung, is completely unfair. However, it'd be fair to say he has got a taste of his own medicine and he fucking hates himself to have you put through that, over and over again. 
"I know now, because–," he takes a deep breath, afraid you won't believe him, "–I have come to the realisation that I'm in love with you."
Your pupils dilate in shock and after a brief moment, your expressions morph into that of disbelief, much like Jimin had expected. 
"I don't expect you to believe it. I know I haven't done much to earn your trust. All I ask is for you to give me a chance to prove myself."
You're too shocked to make coherent thoughts. As a matter of fact, the severity of Jimin's words doesn't click in your brain. How can it, when you have seen it for yourself how appalled Jimin feels at the thought of commitment? How can you digest the thought of Jimin saying these words, that too, to you? 
"What do you want, Jimin?" You ask wanting the interaction to be cut short, afraid that the longer you stay in his presence the more you will find yourself inclined to believe his words. 
"Let me take you out on a date." 
Kim Taehyung
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I'm in a relationship.
You absent-mindedly stare at the words on your screen as you feel the mix of emotions resurface yet again. 
Taehyung is in a relationship. The Taehyung you love so dearly, is in a relationship. And if you are to go with his status updates, he's quite happy about it as well. 
How do you feel about it, exactly? 
You feel betrayed, hurt, confused, angry, perplexed, sad, annoyed, embarrassed, lonely, frustrated, upset. These emotions are only a few to name. There's so much you think and believe, you still haven't figured out yet. Anytime, you try to focus on your emotions in hopes that you will be able to let it all out, all you come up with is an empty feeling. 
That's another thing. You haven't cried at all. But you want to. You want to just let all of it hit you at once and get it off your chest. Because the heavy uncomfortable feeling that often stirs your heart is not something you wish to deal with for long. 
Sometimes your mind comes up with all the little things and moments that had made Taehyung so special to you and you find yourself this close to breaking into uncontrollable sobs. But then it just never happens. It's like someone is pressing the accelerator and the brake at the same time and you're just there, frozen in time, not knowing what to do. 
You doubt if you have even fully grasped the concept of Taehyung being in a relationship. The thought that he's in one and you got to learn about it only after he committed, that too through a WhatsApp status, is completely unbelievable to you for some reason. No matter how much you try, a part of you doesn't want to believe it.
It's a whole set of emotions you never thought Taehyung would make you feel. He was your feel-good person, one of your best friends and someone you trusted with your entire heart. It's something you don't even know as to how to react to. 
"Y/N!"
You blink back to reality when someone shakes you by your shoulders. "Huh?" 
"You zoned out again."
"Oh," you speak in a tone of realisation, "I'm sorry–"
"Nothing to apologise for. Just forget whoever that guy is. He's surely not treating you right if you have this conflicted look on your face all the time."
If only it were that easy. You wish it was that easy. 
You chuckle at your next desk co-worker, Shanaya's, words. "I will surely contemplate on your words." 
"Men don't deserve shit from us if they treat us like shit," she nods seriously. "And with the way, you have had this sad-confused look in your eyes for a whole week now, I strongly doubt that man is any good for you."
Oh yeah, it's been a week.
Although, you could have been fooled by how the admittance of his relationship remains the last text exchanged between the two of you. You just didn't know how to respond to him at that time. You were too busy absorbing the shock to think of a proper response. 
You had just shut your net off and tried your hardest to fall asleep. But you just couldn't get a blink of sleep and since then you also couldn't bring yourself to pretend to be fine with him, when you were far from it.
Maybe you had posted your status a little too frequently to subtly let him know that you're online and well-active on your socials but are simply choosing to not talk to him. On the other side of the coin, is the fact that you feel disheartened that he hasn't made any effort to talk to you. It's the longest the both of you have gone without talking to each other. 
A hand waves in front of your face gaining your attention as your co-worker looks at you knowingly. 
"See! Not good for you."
You smile at her words and shake your head softly, amused by her straightforward and direct nature. 
—-----------
"How are you?"
You roll your eyes before replying. "I'm fine, I'm fine."
"Hmm," your best friend hums. "On a scale of 1 to 10?"
"Idk man, 7?"
"That's an improvement," she speaks to herself. "Now tell me, have you blocked Taehyung, yet?"
"I won't do that," you reply softly with a tone of surety. 
She sighs over the phone. "Babe, he's a dick. Why haven't you cut him off yet, is beyond me."
Your best friend is of the kind whom if you call crying, she'd ask you to first get rid of the person who's responsible for your tears and then she will allow you to tell her what went down for you to cry. If only she were in the same city as you, she'd have committed the crimes herself instead of having to beg you to do them. 
She's protective of you, incredibly so. 
When you had told her everything about Taehyung, she had muttered to herself something along the lines of how she knew he was gonna turn out to be a dickhead. You never queried her on that because in a way you knew what she meant. 
On learning about the situation you and Taehyung were in and about his unwillingness to be in a relationship, she was very firm about making her point that Taehyung was only making excuses. She was adamant that a person who really loves you wouldn't come up with reasons as to why they shouldn't be together. At the time, you had acknowledged what she was trying to say but you added that sometimes people get scared and fear often turns out to be an emotion that is rather difficult to overcome.
With much reassurance from your side that Taehyung was a great guy, she had let go of the topic. However, to say that Taehyung has now earned the entirety of your best friend's hatred, would be an understatement. You'd have been really concerned about his safety had she been in the city. 
"He–", you pause briefly, "–isn't a bad guy." 
Your friend scoffs. "Right. He's the worst."
"He is nice," you say a little more firmly. 
"Oh! Yes please, someone please give him a Nobel prize for his niceness!"
To your surprise the tone in which she speaks, makes you burst out laughing. "You really hate him, don't you?"
"Has he ever given me a reason to NOT despise him?" 
You chuckle as your laughter dies off. "Well, I don't blame you. I'd hate the guy as well if I was in your place."
"Hah! So you agree on something with me."
"But," you emphasise on the word, "he's not a bad guy. I don't know how everything turned out to be this way but trust me he has a very tender heart."
"I cannot believe you're making excuses for him, Y/N." 
Her surprisingly soft tone serves as a reminder that your best friend is probably one of the most compassionate and understanding people you've ever met. The only time you've seen her behave like an angry child who's ready to throw some punches, is when you get hurt. 
And admittedly, you're the same way when it comes to her.
"I'm not making excuses for him, I know him. He'd never intentionally hurt someone."
"But he did hurt you!!!"
"I know and I doubt he realises it," you sigh. "But I need to know his side of things."
"I'm sure he will run if you try to confront him," she grumbles. "He'll probably not even reply if you tell him how much of a dick he's been."
"Heyyy," a childish whine escapes your lips. "I have more faith in him than that. He respects me enough to talk things out."
She makes a sound of complete disbelief, "You bet my ass he would just pull stuff out of his ass."
"We will see," you chuckle.
You had to make up your mind sooner or later and somehow the conversation with your best friend has reminded you of the faith you have in Taehyung. If you need answers, you're sure he'd give them. Most importantly, you don't plan on losing the friendship you have with him this easily. But you don't think you'd be able to just push everything aside and pretend that things are fine. You need to clear it out. You need for him to realise that he has hurt you and you need to know how things changed so quickly. 
—————————————————————
You: hey 
It took you another day to get the simple three-letter word out of your system. But you do it the very first thing in the morning after waking up. Whatever roller coaster ride of emotion it is going to take you on, you want it over by today. 
Thankfully, it takes only ten minutes for your phone to ping to notify you of a message from Taehyung. 
Tae 🐻: hello, birdie 👋
A snort escapes you when you imagine all the lovely cuss words that would leave your best friend's mouth if she were to learn of his response to your 'hey'.  
You, too, find yourself being amused yet disappointed at how oblivious he seems to be. 
You: I'm sorry for not responding to your texts any sooner
Chewing on your lower lip, you click on the send button. While this text is meant to serve as an apology, it also serves as a means for you to know whether he really is as clueless as he seems. You're curious if he's at least aware that something must have been wrong for you to not text for this long.
Tae 🐻: It's okay, don't worry. I understand!
Tae 🐻: work can get busy 
Tae 🐻: it's fine! 
Sighing, you realise it's fruitless. You need to be upfront as there's no other way for you to go about it. 
You: uhmm thanks 
You: but before we catch up and all that, can I just get a few things off my chest?
Tae 🐻: sure! Go ahead. 
Suddenly you find yourself feeling anxious. You are not quite sure how this is going to turn out and how you're going to put your emotions into words. It sure appears to be a difficult job considering how muddled your brain feels every time you think about the events that have led to this.
You:  i don't really know how to say what i want to say lol
You: this is so awkward
Tae 🐻: just say it
Tae 🐻: it's the same ol' me after all
Some of your anxiety softens at his words. 
You: i know but i just dk how to say it 😂
Tae 🐻: that's okay
Tae 🐻: would it be more comfortable for you if I were to go offline? and I can check your messages when you give me the green signal to open your texts? 
Now that he mentions it, you think that would be lovely. That way you could take your time figuring out how to word your sentences without having the rush of typing things out fast over the worry of him coming to assumptions before you say the full thing. 
You: that'd be great! 
You: thank you! 
Tae 🐻: well then, I'll go offline. You speak your heart out 😌
You: open my texts only when you see a thumbs up or a message that directly asks you to open it. Okay?
Tae 🐻: done 👍
Sighing, you relax on your sofa and think. Now that he's offline, you need to figure out what to say. Rather, where to start because you just have so much to say. 
It takes you another two or three minutes before you start typing. 
You: so idk how this is gonna sound or how it's gonna get interpreted but I really need this out of my chest for it's been bothering me the last few days. 
You: so ummm, you know we both had openly admitted to having feelings for each other and then you told me you weren't really ready for a relationship? And I agreed to things being the way they were because I never wanted to pressurise you. I always wanted to be a friend first, whom you can trust and feel safe with, more than anything else. 
You: it's true that we never had a name for what we were. But it's because of that very reason that it always remained very confusing to me as to where we stood. Especially where you stood. 
You: i always could have asked in the course of the year as to where we stood but i always let you be because i was cautious that asking you, would in a way, pressurise you. 
You: however, that is not to say that i wasn't put in a dilemma when i would get propositions for going out on dates or when someone would ask me out. 
You: i didn't know where your feelings for me lied. While I avoided any assumptions, i also didn't act as if you did not have feelings for me. Because what if you did and then my actions hurt you? I knew how much you have been hurt in the past and i just didn't want to add to that. 
Your fingers pause as you take a look at what you have covered so far. When you go through your last two texts, you go awry at the thought of sounding like someone who's claiming to have done him some huge favour. 
You: I'm not saying all this to say that i have done you a huge favour or something by the way. Or that you owe me something in return. 
You: I'm just saying this because when you're so cautious and thoughtful over someone, it hurts to be on the receiving end of actions that make you feel incredibly stupid. 
You: it would have been better if you had told me, you know? That "hey, there's this girl i like," and I'm not saying in a way that you had to take my permission or something but just that it would have been nice to know that you thought of me and of what kind of an effect it would have on me. 
You: I just wish I didn't have to learn from a WhatsApp status 
You pause before thinking if you have missed anything. When you go through your words, you realise that you indeed have missed something important. 
You see, in the mix of all the heavy emotions, you also are happy. You're happy for him. That's something you realised the very day you learned about his relationship. It's odd but even in the midst of all the confusion you were feeling, a part of you felt glad.
You were glad that he found someone he loves and someone who makes him happy. You also found yourself excited on his behalf. 
You won't lie, you were surprised that you weren't jealous. Before Taehyung, for a long time, you had hardly had any guy in your life except for fleeting crushes. Even then, you can acknowledge the fact that jealousy is a very natural emotion to feel in this scenario. However, when you realised that you were happy for him and that happiness did not originate from a place where you had to force it, you were also proud. 
To you, there's no greater testimony of your love than that. 
You: i don't think i have mentioned this before but I'm really happy and excited for you.
You: go ahead and open your texts ig 😂
There are questions in your mind that you think would have been better had you asked them. Questions as to how he was unwilling to be in a relationship when it came to you but suddenly found himself being in a relationship a year later? 
However, you decide that's something you'd rather not ask. 
When you think of it, you indeed find it unfair and there's perhaps that hint of anger that bubbles in your stomach. But you recognise that there's no purpose in asking that question. 
It's possible that his feelings for her run deeper than they ever did for you. Or it could be the fact that they work together and it's human that you'd grow close to someone who's there with you physically rather than someone whom you only talk to over the phone or via texts. 
But figuring out the why is none of your business. Neither is it something you're concerned with. Whatever the reason might be, he's in a relationship and he has already made a choice. The why is irrelevant now. 
Another reason, the why is irrelevant to you is because, you have never found yourself thinking along the lines of what you could have done differently for him to stay and choose you. You have never wondered if it was something you lacked. You'd never let yourself think that way for anyone. Once upon a time, you did. You were filled with insecurities and would question yourself anytime someone would hurt you or leave you. But you have overcome that and have learnt to love yourself. You'd never undo all that progress by entertaining those thoughts ever again. Even if it's Taehyung. 
Three little dots appear at the bottom of the screen letting you know Taehyung is typing. His text soon arrives making your breath hitch. 
Tae 🐻: I have read your texts. Give me some time, and I'll reply to them. 
So you'll have to wait. 
It's fair you think, he can take the time he needs, to figure out what he has to say. 
You only hope you can get over this soon. 
—--------------------------------------------------------
It's been an entire day since Taehyung said he'd reply to your texts but unfortunately, he hasn't yet. 
You know he will reply, you have that faith in him but you only wish he'd do it sooner. There's that lingering anxiety that comes with being unable to predict what he's going to say. 
You have also been wondering if you have worded your words correctly. You found yourself worrying what if you came across as jealous and as someone who's unhappy for him? You really hope you didn't sound bitter because you aren't. 
Yes, there's a part of you that is sad because the moments that you thought were special for the both of you, were all in your head. Because you loved him.
There's also this feeling that now you have been replaced. That now, things won't ever be the same. Perhaps, a part of you wishes you could stay in your head a little longer and pretend. 
But all of that aside, you also have immense amounts of trust in the friendship you both share. Taehyung is someone who is incredibly kind and loving, and he's a great friend in general and you're sure that both of you would somehow manage to keep your friendship intact.
Penny: Has he replied yet? 
You look down at the screen to find a text from your best friend.
You: no 
You: not yet 
Penny: huh told you
Penny: he's a dick 
You smile and shake your head.
Knowing you have a long day ahead, you cook yourself a plate full of breakfast and get ready for work. In a way, you're glad that there's work to keep you busy. You do not know what you'd have done had it been a Sunday. You'd probably have been restless as fuck and would have been checking your phone every five minutes.
Thanks to your workload, you only get time to check your phone during lunch. However, the workload doesn't help with the disappointment you feel, when each time that you do check your phone and find that there's no new message from Taehyung. The disappointment only increases when you realise he has put a status about some funny fact regarding hyenas. 
Whatever he sends you as a response to your texts, it better be good to have you kept waiting this long. 
—--------------------------------------------------------
It's nine in the evening and you're at home when you finally receive Taehyung's text. Your anxiousness is overpowered by curiosity and impatience as you click on his message. It's a wordy and lengthy one. 
Tae 🐻: I was confused, Y/N. Very confused. Although I had confessed my feelings to you, I was extremely confused and scared to take a step forward. When things with Kira ended, I was lonely and sad and my thoughts were very self-destructive. I had zero self-confidence. Talking to you, spending time with you, and texting you gave me the greatest joy and it acted as an escape from those thoughts, feelings and difficulties I was facing at the time. However, if you ask me now, where my feelings originated from, I wouldn't be able to tell. Were they genuine or a result of my love-starved state, I wouldn't be able to tell. But I'm glad it did as it helped me move on from the grief that accompanied my breakup. You have no idea how much you helped me at the time and I was selfish enough to take all of it, without thinking of the consequences, one of which was falling for you. This conversation we are having now is one which we should have had long ago. But I was scared that me not taking the step forward and telling you all this, would make you lose interest in me. Instead, I kept you hanging. I thank you for always being such an amazing friend. I have always loved you but I was too scared to put the tag of a relationship. I mistook my infatuation as readiness for being in a relationship. I'm guilty of all the things you mentioned but I don't know what to do to make things right, as I really don't want to lose the friendship we have. With all that I have done, you'd obviously think that I don't care about you, or at least not as much as you do, but trust me, I do. I have just been shit at expressing my gratitude and telling you how much you mean to me. I'll do better. I just hope you have it in your heart to forgive me for my mistakes. Thank you.
Something that you have been really hoping for, finally happens. You cry. 
Fat, angry droplets of tears roll down your face and you close your eyes shut as the searing pain spreads in your chest. 
Everything just feels so final and also so fruitless. 
Three little dots appear at the bottom of the screen and you realise that Taehyjng must have noticed that you have read his message. 
Tae 🐻: say something
Tae 🐻: this is making me anxious 😅
Despite your blurry vision and him being the cause of your pain, you feel the need to put him at ease. 
You: i appreciate you being honest with me 
You: I'll reply properly in a while 
You: just let me have a good cry first 
The petty part of you wants him to know that you're crying, you want him to know how hurt you are. 
Tae 🐻: Y/N?
Tae 🐻: are you okay?
You don't reply, not having it in yourself to lie.
You let your tears flow as you cry silently.
It's too much for you. You feel used. You feel like a rebound. You feel like a bridge he walked on to reach his destination and to move on from his past. Your heart feels walked all over. Your love feels irrelevant. 
It's true that you wanted to make him feel good. You wanted him to move on from the hurt caused by Kira. You wanted him to feel good about himself. All because you loved him. But you never thought your love was so disposable to him. That it would only be the means for him to move on to someone else. 
What's worse is, despite all of that you understand. You understand that it wasn't a conscious choice of his to hurt you. He, himself, wasn't aware that he was using your love to heal himself. 
It's worse because a part of you feels bitter and angry. If you were the one who helped him get over his hurt, shouldn't he show at least a bit of loyalty to you? You feel angry because he didn't communicate, he left you in the dark and just assumed that you must have been detached enough from your feelings for you to not be bothered by his new relationship. But then a part of you understands that as well. 
With Taehyung, it's a tug of war where you want to be mad at him and feel betrayed by him but no matter what, your love for him makes you see things from his point of view. 
In a way, you find it surprising as well because you never realised just how deep your love runs. Seeing their side of things despite the hurt they have caused? Isn't that love at its purest? However, that makes you ache in pain as well. You loved him as your own. Only to realise that his love for you was merely an infatuation.
His love for you was shallow. 
You think it would have been better if he were an asshole whom you could just hate. It would have been easier for you because you'd know he wasn't worth your time. But how do you handle all of this when he's one of your closest friends? 
That's a question you'd probably need time to answer. You need time to let the stinging pain in your chest subside. You need time to let yourself process the silent heartbreak you're going through. 
With shaky hands and blurry vision, you block Taehyung. 
—--------------------------------------------------------
Last Friday of every month, all your colleagues go out to have dinner and drinks together. You enjoy accompanying them because honestly, it is nice and fun, almost like a little treat to yourself. However, this week, you're not really sure you'd like that. You don't have the energy to socialise.
One might argue that with recent events in mind, the best thing to do would probably be just that, to socialise, as it would take your mind off things that have been bugging you. But then you have always been the type who needs energy to socialise rather than the kind who energises themselves from socialising. 
You have almost completed packing your bag when someone taps on your shoulders. 
"You're coming with us today, right?" Shanaya queries, having a suspicious glint in her eyes as if she's already aware of your plans of not joining. 
Shaking your head softly, you confirm her suspicions. However, Shanaya is having none of that.
"You have to come," she insists, sounding determined. "It's my birthday treat."
You're thoroughly surprised at the information. "It's your birthday today? Oh my god, I'm so sorry–"
"It's not today, it's tomorrow," she cuts you off. "But tomorrow is off so it's an early birthday treat."
She looks at you with such pleading eyes that you cannot bring yourself to say no to her. Reluctantly you smile and the next thing you know, you're being wrapped in a warm hug. 
"Yay, thank you," she squeals, excited. "Now common, let's go."
As it turns out, today's destination is one stop away. Usually, you all go to someplace that's near and doesn't require transportation. However, Shanaya wanted to take all of you to a particular place that, according to her, serves the best dumplings and noodles. Who can say no to Shanaya, anyway?
As you sit there and wait with the others for the bus to arrive, you look at the screen with Taehyung's conversation open. 
It's only yesterday that you unblocked him. You were well aware that you'd be unblocking him and talking to him again at some point. The friendship was too precious for you to let go. And it's not something you're saying simply because you love him. If you were to look back, Taehyung has never been a bad friend to you. He's been there for you whenever you needed. He has never let you down when it comes to friendship. 
However, you doubt you're ready to talk to him just yet. That doesn't mean you don't want to.
There's just so much that you have to tell him. The little things that have occurred over the course of the two weeks that you had him blocked. Everything feels a little incomplete unless shared with him. 
Your fingers hover over his profile picture and you hesitate to click on it. He has uploaded a new profile picture and you wonder if it is too weird to just stare at it.
"Y/N?" 
The sound of your name startles you and while trying to hide your phone screen, you accidentally end up clicking on the small call button right next to the profile picture. 
Shit. Shit. Shit. 
You cut the call immediately and stare at the screen which now shows his name at the top of your call logs. He's gonna see a missed call from you, shit. 
"The bus is here, Y/N."
Oh right, that must be why Mike had called for you. You quickly gather your thoughts and get on the bus, shying away from the worried look Shanaya throws your way. 
When you get a seat on the bus, the first thing you do is shoot him a text. You indeed are not ready to talk to him but your accidental call has ruined your plans. 
You: I'm so sorry
You: i called you by mistake
You know it will probably be a while until he sees your call and your text and it's a good thing that you have your co-workers to accompany you. That way you'd be distracted enough to not fret about it unnecessarily. 
All of you get down when your stop arrives and make your way inside the small restaurant. 
The chatter and the giggles and the latest gossip about your boss is enough for you to temporarily ignore the sinking sadness that sits at the pit of your stomach. 
"Y/N, drinks?"
Your colleagues are well familiar with the answer to this question. You don't prefer drinking. The reason behind that, however, is not known to them.
Like the majority of people, you enjoy getting drunk and letting it loose. However, you're the kind of drunk who gets giggly and finds every little thing amusing. And for some reason, you feel comfortable to let that part of you out, only in the presence of a few people. Four, to be exact. 
One, your best friend. Two, Min Yoongi. Three, Lee Sana. And four, Kim Taehyung. 
Needless to say, you hardly ever get the chance to get drunk. 
The usual answer rests on the tip of your tongue, but there's also this desperation for you to let go of the heaviness. You really could do with some giggles and amusement.
"I'd probably have some whiskey," you reply with a shy unsure smile as your colleagues cheer.
The night somehow refuses to come to an end as you all soon find yourselves seated on the floor of Kate's apartment, in a circle. It starts off with some dancing and then Nitesh takes up the guitar and starts singing. He's a good singer, you can appreciate that and everyone's having fun with big smiles on their faces as they clap along with the beats. 
You have had three shots so far and for the love of god, you still feel that melancholy. It heightens when you realise you're sad in such a fun environment. Despite wanting to join them in their fun, your mind keeps wondering what it would be like if Taehyung were here. Gosh, it's been so long since the both of you have hung out and truthfully, it has never bothered you before. Whatever communication you two had was more than enough for you. Sharing the little details about your day, sending him silly stickers, all that held more meaning to you than he probably ever realised. That was much more intimate to you than anything physical.
You shake your head to yourself when you realise you're here being sad over a guy who wasn't even your boyfriend. It's so ridiculous. 
But then again, despite the lack of a label, you were loyal to him with your entirety.
Geez, the alcohol seemingly has made you more sensitive. 
"You sure are having fun," Shanaya comments. "I'm assuming the alcohol didn't help much?"
It doesn't take rocket science for someone to figure out that if a person who's never said yes to drinks before suddenly willingly says yes to them, there must be some pain they are trying to numb. 
"Surprisingly, no."
She hums. "Wanna talk about it?" 
Shanaya has asked this question to you multiple times over the span of the last few days. Never has it made you feel as if it's coming from a place where she is prying for details. It has only made you feel as if she's letting you know she's all ears, whenever you need her. Each time, you have shrugged as if it's not a big deal, as if it's not important enough for you to talk about. However, now, you really could do with a shoulder to cry on.
Hence, you vent and even amid all the noise and music, she intently listens to your words without interrupting even once. 
When you finish, she releases a heavy sigh. "That's what you meant when you said it was complicated."
You chuckle at the reminder of the response you had given to your then-new co-workers, to being asked about your love life. You were so cautious of hurting Taehyung, having no idea that it was going to be him, hurting you.
"Do you plan on being friends with him?" 
You don't miss the edge her tone has, as if she believes it's not worth it. Either that, or she thinks it's not possible to be friends with someone who's hurt you like that.
"I do," your reply is instantaneous. 
"Don't you feel angry?"
"I do," of course you are angry. It would be absurd if you were not. 
"Are you sure that is a good idea?"
You're not. You know the dynamic between you and Taehyung would never be the same again. Things would be different. You have now realised that things which meant a lot to you, perhaps never held the same meaning to him. The dynamic is bound to change. But is that good enough of a reason to cut your friendship off?
"He's only a human. People fall in love and sometimes, they fall out of love. I do not control the way he feels and when it comes to love, I don't think any of us have a control over who we fall for or when we fall," you release a sigh. Maybe it's all the more difficult for you because you still love him despite everything. "He's not in the wrong for falling for someone just because it's not me. I wish he would have not kept me in the dark but we all make mistakes, we all mess up."
"But more importantly, he's a friend first and he's always been an incredible friend to me. Now, I wouldn't be a good friend if I were to ever entertain the idea of making him choose between me and his happiness, would I?" 
She remains quiet for a moment, observing you closely. "Do you mean all that you said?"
You nod. 
She chuckles. "Well then, you have one of the purest hearts I have ever come across."
—--------------------------------------------------------
You were aware that there were unread texts from Taehyung but had refused to open them until morning. The night was exhausting and more than anything, you wanted to sleep. However, when morning came rolling, there was no avoiding opening his messages. 
Tae 🐻: why are you suddenly being so formal? 😂
Tae 🐻: it's completely fine.
Relief courses through your veins at his casual tone. You don't know how you'd have responded had he mentioned you blocking him seemingly out of nowhere. However, there's a small part of you that remains curious if he had even realised you blocked him. Nevertheless, you'd much rather put all of that behind you and move forward.
You: i was randomly scrolling through my phone and the next thing i knew, my phone was calling you 
Tae 🐻: lmao 
Tae 🐻: blame it on the phone, yes
You smile. Going back to being friends might not be that difficult. 
You two chat a bit and catch up with each other about things the both of you have been up to recently. You lose track of time as you make yourself a cup of tea, refusing to let your phone down, feeling excited at the thought of telling him about the things you have been up to. 
Tae 🐻: well i have something to tell you
You: uh oh
You: go on
Tae 🐻: so last day me and Bridget went on a date 
Tae 🐻: and things got steamy 👉👈
Tae 🐻: if you know what i mean
You very well know what he means.
Your stomach sinks in disappointment.
It's not because you're jealous or that the thought of Taehyung with someone else makes you feel disheartened, you have moved past that. Rather, you feel disappointed that he thought it was something appropriate to mention to you. 
Had it been anyone else in some other scenario, you'd have had no issue. Friends, close ones especially, tend to discuss these sorts of things, don't they? However, this is Taehyung and keeping the recent events in mind, he should not have mentioned it to you at all. Especially not when, his new relationship had made you feel as if he didn't bother to think of you, once. 
He keeps on going about how it was one of the best nights of his life but you don't find it in yourself to play pretend and entertain him. Although you don't directly ask him to stop, you don't reply to his texts either.
Tae 🐻: Y/N? 
The screen reads when he's done and probably upon the realisation that you haven't said anything for a long time. 
You: nice
Oh, how you wish technology was advanced enough for the text to be read aloud on his phone in a sarcastic tone.
You: let me tell you about yesterday
You: we went back to Kate's place 
You: and i got drunk simply because i was feeling low and sad and depressed and was looking for an escape 
You: but that didn't help, only enhanced what i was already feeling
You could have probably avoided saying this but then you wanted to say it. You don't know if he'll put two and two together but it's your own way of telling him that things are still sensitive.
Tae 🐻: you sound like a typical guy whose heart has been broken 😂 
A loud laugh escapes your lips. Gosh, is this the guy you have been crying over for weeks? 
Wow.
—--------------------------------------------------------
Taehyung has let you down, as a friend. More than once. 
A few days back, he'd asked if he could send you a poem that he'd written. You had always known he liked writing stuff and hadn't thought much of it. However, upon asking what it was about, he had replied 'newfound love'. Your reply to which had been, 'In that case, I'm not interested'. 
You didn't care how that sounded, you were not gonna put up with this bullshit just because it would be impolite. 
With each passing day and with each small incident where you feel as if your feelings are totally disregarded, your disappointment keeps growing. You really had not expected this kind of behaviour from Taehyung. 
One of the main reasons you had fallen for him was the way he seemed so emotionally wise. He was aware and attentive towards the people around him and was always kind. His recent attitude contradicts all of that.
There is a part of you that also recognises how his recent behaviour has made you detached. You could not say that the Taehyung you fell in love with and the Taehyung now, are the same. In a very twisted way, it made accepting the fact that there's nothing between the two of you, except friendship much easier. 
Tae 🐻: Y/N
Tae 🐻: I messed up. 
The text comes at around one in the morning. The only reason you're awake is the report that's due in two days. But the incoming text puts your fingers to a pause as worry clouds your senses. 
Is he okay? 
You: what happened? 
Tae 🐻: i messed up 
Tae 🐻: i feel so embarrassed
You: can you stop being vague? 
Tae 🐻: i sent a vm to Bridget of me singing TS 
You couldn't help rolling your eyes when you read the words. Huh, you should have seen it coming. 
Unlike other times, for some odd reason, you find yourself leaning towards the idea of entertaining him. Perhaps it's because you haven't had a proper conversation with him for a long time. And also perhaps, because you know this won't go on for long. 
You: so?
Tae 🐻: she is a huge TS fan 
Tae 🐻: she asked me to sing one of her favourite songs
Tae 🐻: and i cannot ever bring myself to say no to her
Tae 🐻: but like now that i listen back to the audio i sound terrible and i maybe did a British accent while singing
Understandably, you can see where he's coming from. The nervousness that comes with making a gesture for someone you adore and then feeling embarrassed about it, worrying whether they found it romantic or did you make a fool of yourself. And less than one month of being in a relationship is not enough to quieten the nervous jitters. 
So, you tell him what you would have, had it been any other friend. Upon further chatting you realise he genuinely feels like crawling inside a hole and never coming out. It doesn't surprise you, Taehyung has always been like that, going for the big gestures and self-doubt creeping in later.
You let yourself enjoy the normalcy and pretend that Taehyung is just another friend of yours and that he isn't someone who broke your heart.
—--------------------------------------------------------
Your phone has been buzzing and pinging since morning. Midnight to be specific. Birthday wishes have been flowing in with notes and gifs and with each message you feel more appreciated than you feel the rest three sixty-four days of the year. 
However, with each notification sound, there has also been that hope and expectation that maybe this one would be from Taehyung.
He had texted you a few days back reminding you of your upcoming birthday and although it's afternoon already, you don't really believe that he has forgotten the day altogether. 
When evening rolls around, you start growing sceptic. You squirm in your sofa, finally acknowledging that it's very well a possibility that your birthday might have slipped his mind. It makes you go back to the long, seven-hundred-word, letter he had written for your birthday, last year. 
The words make you smile.
Do you know how amazing you are? I don't think you do and it will be my job to make you see that.
Sometimes, I think I don't deserve you with how kind and loving you are but I'm so incredibly grateful for you that no amount of words would ever be enough.
I have never met someone like you, ever. 
Only a few lines from the massive paragraph that his greeting text was and the corner of your lips lift up. However, the moment is broken when you realise you're smiling. 
You shake your head as sadness fills you. You cannot let yourself recall old memories and feel the way they used to make you. It's not an option anymore.
Locking your screen, you sigh. You won't lie, you had really wanted a text from him. Anything that would show you that he still cares for you and the friendship between the both of you still held a chance. It's no wonder that you have been seeking some sort of reassurance after everything that he has done. 
It's around eleven at night that Taehyung's name first appears on your notification bar. You grin wide and open your text, glad to have been proven wrong and feeling stupid to have considered the idea of him forgetting your birthday. 
A link to a YouTube video.
Your grin disappears just as quickly and disappointment like nothing you have ever felt before, makes its way to your heart. 
You leave him on seen.
A day passes and you wonder if he will send at least a belated wish, apologising for not wishing you any sooner. But nope 
It's the day after that, the second day past your birthday when you check for any messages from him and you are led to his stories. It's slides of pictures of him and Bridget and the caption is him singing praises of her and telling the world how much in love he is because it's her birthday. 
That's your last straw.
It's probably a very small issue, forgetting birthdays and all. But to you, it's not. It just adds up to the pile of things that have made you feel like you were the only one who was taking into consideration the friendship that was at stake.
Plus, it cannot be that difficult to remember your birthday when his girlfriend's birthday is literally two days after yours. 
You have had enough. You need to walk out of Taehyung's life.  
Considering all that had made you fall for Taehyung, it's incredibly hard for you to believe that he doesn't know what he is doing and that he has forgotten basic decency. The option that was left with you, didn't make sense to you either because it implied he let you down intentionally. But the Taehyung you knew would never hurt a fly. 
It made you wonder if it was simply a result of his honeymoon phase that he had forgotten to consider how his actions could hurt people. Maybe he was too elated to think things through.  The empathetic part of you understood. But then you shook that away, knowing very well that if you were in his position, irrespective of how happy and high you were, you would never do that. 
Maybe you had realised that this was coming from the very day, he hadn't thought twice before mentioning his intimate moments with Bridget. But, boy oh boy, had you hoped to be wrong.
You had given him opportunities to prove you wrong, to give you a reason to stay but he only kept giving you reasons as to why you should leave.
It's an odd sensation that washes over you when you come to the conclusion that this isn't worth it anymore. 
You feel sad that the friendship is coming to an end. You're sure you'd miss his company and that there would be days when you mourn the friendship that once used to be. You know there would be times when you'd resent him and there would also be times when you'd feel angry at yourself for giving so much of you to him. 
But you won't ever regret your choice of leaving him. 
One thing this whole ordeal with Taehyung has made you realise is how deeply you love. How even in the midst of hurt, you were happy for him and how you saw and loved him for what he was and not for what he could be or for what he offered you. It made you take pride in the way you love. You gave him the purest form of love. 
A life where you and Taehyung are not friends, won't be your loss. It would be his. Irrespective of whether he realises that or not.
You feel oddly poweful with the knowledge that there was nothing lacking in your love and you'd never dishonour your love by staying where it isn't valued, appreciated and seen. 
But you also have a lot to say to him. You are not going to just block him and let him wonder why you did that. No, you'd tell him exactly why you left. 
—--------------------------------------------------------
It took you a couple of days to get down everything you wanted to say. There were times when you felt conscious of the ever-growing length of your letter and you had to shake off that feeling because this was going to be the last interaction between the both of you. Why stop yourself from saying everything you want to just because you're worried it'll be lengthy? 
You read the words one last time, wanting to make sure that you feel satisfied. 
Hello Taehyung, 
I hope you're doing fine. I wouldn't know how you're doing because we haven't had a proper conversation in quite some time. Or at least that is how it has felt to me. Nevertheless, I'm writing this because there's loads that I need to get off my chest. So, here we go.
When I saw you for the first time and we talked, I could feel you carried a lot of pressure on your shoulders. Almost like, you had something to prove, like you wanted to show that you weren't what you were perceived to be. Or maybe you wanted to prove that you were more than just what meets the eye. I didn't know what in particular. It felt like you wanted to be seen. 
And would you believe, I grew a soft spot for you? Do you know why? Because somewhere, I felt the same way too. 
I also knew we would be great friends, lol. You know how? Because I knew you had a heart of gold. You cared for others, you were thoughtful and kind. However, I could feel that you have a habit of being harsh on yourself and it didn't sit well with me. From the very first time we talked, I wanted to be a good friend to you, someone you could rely on, someone you could trust and someone who could possibly make you be a little less harsh on yourself. 
Perhaps with the weak spot, I also grew protective of you.
You were desperate for love and at the same time felt unworthy of it. I didn't know why though. I didn't know what had you believing so lowly about yourself. But then you told me about Kira, and it all made sense. 
It made sense why you felt unworthy and why you felt the need to prove that you were more than what others saw. Because, you believed Kira's words. You really thought you were unlovable. 
Instead of feeling the satisfaction of  being proved right, I felt so angry at Kira. I may have clawed her eyes out in my mind more than once. 
After learning the scars that she left on you, it only made me wish you could see yourself the way I do. I wished you could see that there was nothing you had to do to be loved except for just being you.
You may wonder why I'm suddenly saying all this. Well, let's just say it's necessary.
When you told me you were falling for me, I was surprised but then I felt myself feeling so warm at the thought of you liking me. It took me a few minutes to realise that I was falling for you too. 
But that was it. 
We never put a label on what we were and I was okay with it. Because I was okay with what we had, I never asked for anything because you were happy. You were also such a great friend, someone who I could talk to anything and everything about. What more could I ask for?
What's more? I could tell you were slowly coming out of whatever shell you were put in by Kira. I can't quite explain how it made me feel to see you smile more freely, to see you be more confident and be sure of yourself. But to put it lightly, it made me feel damn good lol.
I knew I had some part to play in it. I just didn't know that was the only part you wanted me to play. 
I moved past all that, trust me. You using my love as a rebound, making a girlfriend without even letting me know once, I moved past all that. Because, I trusted you when you told me you were confused and confusion is never intentional, is it? 
It hurt like a bitch to think that was all my love meant to you. But it was okay, you didn't mean to hurt me. You cared about me. You cared about our friendship. You valued it. 
Or so you said. 
I don't know if you meant it when you said it. But in case you did mean it, here are a few things not to do to the girl you used as a rebound and intend to keep the friendship with.
First, do not mention that you had sex with your new girlfriend. 
Second, do not be dumb enough to say "You sound like a typical guy whose heart has been broken" when you are the guy who's caused the damage. 
Third, do not send her the song you sang for your girlfriend and seek comfort to soothe the embarrassment you feel.
Fourth, do not ask her to read the poems you wrote for your girlfriend.
Fifth, do not forget her birthday when your girlfriend's is just two days later. 
These things didn't hurt me as much as it disappointed me. Would you believe, I laughed when you called me a typical heartbroken guy? When I got drunk the day before, my head was filled with thoughts of you and my heart was heavy with the knowledge that I was only a rebound. That day, even in the midst of alcohol, I chose our friendship over everything. I chose to forgive you. I chose to love you, still. But when you mentioned what you did, I just found it so funny to think that this was the guy I was thinking so much about and was so sad about. 
As it turns out, I'm not much fond of thoughtless people. 
But still, I hoped that somehow you'd give me a reason to stay. All you did, however, was turn a blind eye to my feelings and disrespected me.
If you were to ask me, whether my love for you is romantic or platonic, I wouldn't be able to tell. I have never sat and thought about it. All I know is I loved you, in one of the most unselfish ways possible. 
But that's not to say I don't realise how I deserve to be treated. And that's not to say that I'd stay somewhere where I'm an afterthought. 
When I said, I was happy for you and Bridget I really meant it and I hope you don't think that your relationship ever had a role to play in this decision of mine. It didn't, it was solely you that made me choose this option.
But this friendship of ours has run its course.
I would never disrespect myself by putting up with your disrespect. I loved you as long as you were worth it. But the moment you took my love for granted was the very moment you lost my respect and love, both. 
If you have made it to the end, then congrats! I didn't know if you'd read the whole thing but truth be told I don't particularly care about you reading it either. I wrote this for myself, not for you. 
Before I finish this long-ass letter, let me tell you something; you have lost one of the best people you'd ever meet in this lifetime. 
Thank you,
With Love,
The purest form.
Jeon Jungkook
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His words echo in your mind and after an elongated pause, you find it in yourself to respond. “What do you mean?”
Jungkook gulps, hating how controlled your facial expressions are. In the months of knowing you, he has never seen you try this hard to hide your emotions. “Me and Niki are not actually a couple.”
“Thank you for rephrasing the sentence but I am afraid that it does not make things any clearer for me.”
Jungkook takes a sharp inhale and meets your eyes with uncertainty. “It’s just a PR stunt.”
It takes a few moments for the words to register but when they do, things start making sense, almost like puzzle pieces falling in place.
Namjoon’s hesitance in answering your question about the truth of their relationship. His lack of shock to the words you had heard Niki speak and most importantly, why Niki might have said those words. The whole relationship is not real to begin with.
“But, why?” The words leave your lips without your permission, before you’re able to catch them.
For a moment, he hesitates, wondering if it’s his place to say a few of the things he will have to, to make things clear.  But then he shakes off the worry, knowing Niki won’t mind.
“Both of our fandom, for some reason, ship us together. You know the whole ‘both are maknaes’ thing. Nevertheless, both of our companies thought it would be mutually beneficial for the two of us to put up this false act that we are dating.”
“How is it supposed to be mutually beneficial?” It doesn’t make sense to you. One of the oddest and most toxic traits of the kpop industry is how idols are expected to be loyal to their fans by remaining single. How then, a public relationship is supposed to garner anything except for unnecessary attention and hate?
“Niki is well, dating a youtuber. A female youtuber and pictures of them hanging out together didn’t take long to make it to the internet. Although at the beginning, everyone thought they were just good friends, soon there were questions as to whether it was just a simple friendship and well, people were not really happy with that idea,” he sighs, feeling tired just from thinking about everything that had led to this whole ordeal. “It wasn’t only about Niki dating a girl, it was also about her dating someone that wasn’t me. And of course, it was her girlfriend’s fault for coming between two people who are 'meant to be'. All of which ultimately made it incredibly difficult for the two of them to be at peace.”
You can imagine. The thought makes you sympathise with both of them. From Jungkook's words, it's clear the target was Niki’s girlfriend but you are sure it couldn’t have been easy for Niki to watch someone she loves hurt like that.
You understand Niki’s part of the deal. Putting up this font, would stop the threats and hate aimed at them but what was Jungkook supposed to get from this?
Jungkook looks at you and nods, acknowledging the unasked question. "When the offer first came, our company had turned it down, not seeing how it could benefit me. But I was the one who insisted and agreed."
"Why?" 
His discomfort grows and he swallows nervously, trying to gather his thoughts. "People are obsessed with me and Niki to the point where it's very predictable that they would hate it if someday I were to date someone who isn't her. I thought it would be good if we did this thing and people believed that we gave it a shot but it didn't work out. That way it would be one less thing I'd have to worry about while dating someone."
You put the thought behind of how it seems incredibly far-fetched and nod. He has answered your question about the nature of their relationship and why it was necessary. However, you still have a bunch of questions about a lot of things–starting with how crushed you felt when he moved you as Namjoon's make-up artist out of nowhere–but you do not wish to let them see the light of the day. 
Turning away, you start shuffling with some of the make-up products, indicating that the conversation is done. 
"Please say something," Jungkook pleads, tormented by your silence. 
"There's nothing more to say," you mutter, keeping away any emotion from being shown. 
"That can't be true."
You hate how sure he sounds. As if he is aware of every thought that's running in your head. As if he knows you a little too well. You absolutely despise how you might have believed the notion, once. Now, however, you do not want to. Because that'd mean he knew exactly how much hurt, his ignorance and pretence as if you don't even exist, caused you. 
"Y/N, please. We haven't talked for a long time. Please don't shut me out." 
Technically, you have two options. One, to keep ignoring him. Two, to snap at him and let every bit of your anger out. You had initially planned on sticking to option number one as it would make you look just as indifferent as Jungkook. However, now you find the option of letting words out without a filter, very appealing. 
"I know, I messed up but just talk to me–" the sound of a shaky exhale meets your ears, "–I miss spending time with you."
Well, that's some audacity. 
In the blink of an eye, you're facing Jungkook and taking several steps in his direction. You stop only a few steps away from him but you're close enough for him to notice the agony and pure rage storming through your eyes. 
"You better shut your mouth, Jeon." 
Jungkook flinches at your warning tone. However, he refuses to take the hint. "Y/N, ignoring me isn't going to solve–"
"Trust me, I'm not trying to solve anything," you speak through gritted teeth. "I'm just doing what I think is the right thing to do after someone disrespects you immensely."
"I wasn't trying to disrespect you," he claims, desperately trying to make you believe in something you don't buy for even a second.
"Yeah, ghosting me out of nowhere is not disrespecting me at all," your voice drops with sarcasm 
He feels his heart drop when you use the word 'ghosting'. Did you think that's what he did? Is that what it looked like? Gosh, this has all gotten messed up and he's the one to be blamed.
"I didn't ghost you," he mumbles, unable to look into your eyes and the sight of it causes all the pain that you had buried, to come to the surface. 
"Then please explain what it was," you voice waivers and you immediately hate yourself for showing weakness. "Please tell me what you thought you were doing by replacing me without even showing the basic decency to inform me that, yourself?"
He gulps, wondering if you'd even believe what he has to say. Even if you do, would you be willing to look past his stupidity?
"I found your note in my bag", you visibly flinch at the mention of the note. You had intentionally kept from mentioning your little confession, praying to whatever god is out there that somehow the note had been damaged before it reached the hands of the person they were meant to find. 
Jungkook notices your change of expression as it turns from hurt to embarrassed to anger and he despises himself for making you feel like that. "I had to make a quick decision and I didn't think you'd like to be my make up artist while I was fake dating Niki, especially without you having any knowledge about the fake part."
You stare at him blankly and try to process what he was saying. Did he–did he think he was doing you a favour by cutting you off?
You scoff, turn around and start packing your things with the intention of leaving the room. You're so done with this conversation.
When Jungkook understands your intention, he's quick on his feet and rushes to be right next to you. "Just give me the chance to explain myself fully."
You don't reply, your insides fuming.
"Y/N please," he begs. "Just hear me out once. Then I'll accept whatever it is that you decide for the both of us."
"I'm not gonna stand here and hear you speak utter bullshit that does nothing but let me down further."
Your voice comes with such a sense of finality that Jungkook knows, no matter how much he begs and pleads, you won't be giving him the opportunity to speak his side of things. 
Hence, he doesn't stop you when you walk past him and leave the room. But it only makes him more desperate for the day when you finally find it in your heart to give him a chance. Just one.
—-----------------------------------------------------
Jungkook has been persistent. Perhaps a little too persistent with his attempts to earn your forgiveness. Or at least that's what you assume the bouquets of flowers and little notes you find everyday at work are for. 
It's not only the flowers, it's also his constant texting and voicemails. His texts vary from a simple 'hi, what are you doing' to 'please, i miss you' and his voicemails have been a mix of him telling you about his day (something he used to do regularly when you were his makeup artist) to a more emotional version of his texts begging you to talk to him. 
You won't lie, his incessant pleadings have made you curious what more could he possibly have to say. What could be so different from what he has already said that he is so desperate? 
On one hand, you find an odd sense of satisfaction from not responding to Jungkook despite all his efforts. You don't know what that makes you but after the hurt and embarrassment you felt to the point where you had to numb yourself to block those emotions out, his tries and attempts feel like an ointment to your wounds. On the other hand, however, is a voice nagging you as to how, this cannot go on for long. The huge bouquets that wait for you everyday are soon going to catch attention and if anyone were to catch a hint of who it is from…gosh, you don't want to imagine that.
But when you will find it in yourself to have a conversation with him, still remains unknown. All you know is whenever that will be, it will be solely because you don't want word to go out. Yes, that's all it will be. 
Today when you walk into Namjoon's dressing room, there's another bouquet waiting for you. The sight of it causes you to sigh. You don't know what Namjoon thinks of this but you're thankful that he hasn't mentioned it yet. That however, made it quite clear that he has some idea as to who they are from.
You let the flowers be where they are. You have never really taken them home or put them in water, afraid that it would be interpreted as you being accepting of his efforts, when you're far from it. You're still hurt and angry. 
If anything, sometimes you despise walking into a room full of flowers as they serve as a reminder of the thoughts you had before confessing to him. You remember thinking how confessing felt like putting a delicate unbloomed flower in someone's hand and whether the bud gets to bloom or not, depends on the person you're confessing to. 
If only you had known of the thorns you would be exposed to, back then, you'd never have confessed. 
The door swings open softly and Namjoon walks in. "Good morning, Y/N."
"Good morning," you greet him back with a smile. 
"So what's on card for today?" He asks before taking his usual seat. 
"There's nothing much for today, just rehearsals and then you have a v-live," you mumble. "But firstly I need to do your weekly facial."
He huffs. "Is it the one that requires you putting a lot of slimy stuff on my face and it stays on for like thirty minutes?" 
"Yep," you reply with a light laugh. Despite what he says, you have learnt that Namjoon quite enjoys his facial sessions. Unlike a certain someone. 
Your smile falters and your sudden change of mood doesn't go unnoticed by Namjoon. 
"Have you considered speaking to Jungkook?" He asks after a brief moment of silence. 
You're taken aback by his words. Namjoon has always avoided speaking on the matter. He has never even queried as to what you do with the flowers. Hence, his direct way of questioning has you fumbling with words. 
"I d–haven't," you change your wording, fearing 'I don't want to', might just be a little too rude. 
However, your choice of answer is put to vain with the very next question he asks. "Do you want to?" 
"I don't want to," you softly shake your head, mildly afraid how Namjoon will interpret it.
He simply nods, without any trace of judgement. "I'm not saying this because I'm picking sides, but I have known Jungkook since he was a kid and I can tell that he really is sorry. 
"Whether to forgive him or not, is completely on you. But put a little trust on him that he must have some reason behind doing what he did. Just hear him out once."
You keep quiet, unsure what to say. Thankfully, Namjoon understands that and soon changes the topic of conversation to something more light-hearted. 
Hours later, when everything comes to a close and it's time for you to leave, you find yourself hesitating. Namjoon's words simply refuse to leave your mind. Put a little trust in him. How can you, when he's let you down in every way possible? When he has betrayed your trust in ways that still keep hurting you? 
You gulp when you realise there's probably no end to the hurting until you have a chat with Jungkook and hear his side. At least, that way you will know his reasoning behind everything and it will hopefully stop your self loathing for putting the note in his bag. Even if all he gives is excuses, you'd at least have the satisfaction of having heard him out. Later maybe a week, or a month from now, when your emotions subside, you wouldn't have this unscratched itch of not knowing what he had to say. 
Maybe, maybe it's for the best that you talk to him.
—-----------------------------------------------------
"Come in," Jungkook calls out in response to the knock at his door and is visibly surprised when you walk in. He quickly gets up from his seat, stuffs his phone in his pocket and with a nervous voice asks, "would you like some coffee?"
You shake your head. You're not here for coffee. "No, thank you. I'm here to talk to you."
He nods as his nervousness spikes. This is what he has wanted and hoped for so long, but now that you're here, he doubts you will believe him. What if you don't? Even worse, what if you do and still don't forgive him?
The both of you get seated and your fingers anxiously play with the strap of your handbag. "What is it that you have been wanting to tell me?"
Jungkook sighs. Pushing the nervousness away, he knows that the only thing in his power is to tell you his side of things. Otherwise, he's powerless. 
"For the things I said last day, to make sense, I would have to mention that I like you," he cannot find it in himself to look at you as he says that. "I've liked you for a long time."
The words take you by surprise, and your mouth parts in shock. The shock then morphs into disbelief and denial. He did not just confess to liking you.
"But it's never that simple when you're a famous K-pop idol," something bitter coats his words and he looks defeated. "The consequences of dating me, is something that one doesn't realise until they face it for themselves."
Jungkook has grown a thick skin. But you? He doesn't want you to be someone who ever has to go through things that require you to build a thick skin. He doubts he will ever forgive himself if he were to see you beaten up by harsh words and constant criticism, all because of your association to him.
"I wanted to tell you how I felt but just the sheer terror of what you may have to go through, kept me from doing so," an unwanted shiver runs through his body when he recalls the moments where the fluttering in his chest would always be accompanied by a heavy sinking in his stomach. "It wasn't my choice to stress about these things but I couldn't help myself considering that associating with me had consequences."
Your face falls with each word that leaves his lips. 
"It was choosing between giving into my feelings and listening to logic. I tried to be logical and practical for as long as I could. Until, I just couldn't," a humourless chuckle escapes his lips. "I remember thinking that I just need to tell you how you make me feel."
He doesn't voice how there was a part of him that had wished you'd not reciprocate his feelings. That way, even after his sheer selfishness, things would be fine. 
"It was around the time I decided on confessing to you, that I learnt about the proposition from Niki's agency. Call me incredibly stupid but I thought if I did this, I'd at least do something instead of sitting and dreading with my hands tied." Jungkook shakes his head, finding it cruel that even after all this, he somehow managed to mess everything up. 
Your mouth parts unknowingly when the pieces click. Jungkook's decision to date Niki for the cameras, didn't come out of nowhere and it wasn't as far-fetched as you thought. His decision had come from a place of anxiety where he felt powerless. 
"But then I found that note," he cannot help but recall that day fondly. He felt like a kid and often found himself smiling, looking into the mirror. However, that joy was soon wiped off when the situation sank in. "I was so excited and happy, but then I realised that I had already agreed to date Niki."
You hardly blink as Jungkook speaks and due to that, you don't miss the way a smile appears on his lips. But it's gone as soon as it appears, as if he catches himself slipping and reprimands himself for it. It makes you consider the possibility if he was receptive to your confession in a positive way. 
"I didn't know what to do, I couldn't imagine letting you know that I felt the same but then going out and holding another woman's hand. Even if it's for the cameras, it's–," he closes his eyes shut as if pained, "–it's horrible."
"I couldn't do that but I also needed to make a quick decision. I thought the only way to go about things was to postpone answering your confession. After the announcement of the breakup with Niki, I thought I could talk to you then and clear things out. At that moment, that was the only option that made sense to me."
His words take you back to the day when you were filled with nervous excitement only for it to be replaced with dread and heartbreak when you learnt that Jungkook had replaced you as his makeup artist, just like that. 
"It was stupid, I know," he mutters in a small voice. "I don't have anything to say in my defence except for admitting that I messed things up and I didn't realise what it must have looked like to you, until it was too late." 
He paused for a few moments, looking exhausted. "I-I am sorry for everything. I know it's hard to believe but hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do. I really just wanted to make things right. If you can, please, forgive me."
You sense that to be the end of everything Jungkook had to say. The way he looks at the floor and refuses to look at you, makes you want to comfort him. But your feelings are too muddled, you're too confused and there's a lot that you have learnt that has left you surprised. You don't think you're in the state of mind to make decisions now. 
"Thank you for telling me everything," you keep your voice soft. It gives Jungkook the courage to finally look up at you and his breath hitches when he realises you aren't looking at him with your gaze filled with hate and pain. It gives him hope. "But I need some time to process everything." 
Jungkook nods, knowing that's the best he can ask for at the moment. He's relieved that you aren't dismissing his words and feels incredibly grateful that you are taking time to think things through. He knows that you taking time is more for yourself than for him, but there's a hint of a promise that this is not the end of the conversation, that you'll talk to him again. And that's more than anything Jungkook can ever ask for.
—-----------------------------------------------------
The last few days, your mind has been completely occupied with Jungkook's words. Not only his words but also the way he looked refuses to leave your mind. You couldn't find it in yourself to doubt his genuineness and the fact that he was feeling terrible, was displayed in green neon lights. 
You had to remind yourself repeatedly that it isn't only about how he feels. You should cater to your feelings and figure out what to do next. 
There was also the new revelation that Jungkook liked you. Quite honestly, you didn't know what to do with that information. The whole conversation was melancholic and it must have rubbed off on you for you didn't feel the joy one usually does on learning that their crush likes them back. 
Everything was quite confusing. So much so, that it had taken an entirety of five days for you to sort out your thoughts and approach Jungkook. 
He sits across from you in a pale blue shirt and black trousers, his body language screams that he's nervous and oddly enough it comforts you to know that you aren't the only one feeling that way. 
"After learning everything, I couldn't help but wish you had communicated before. It would have saved the both of us a lot of hurt," you begin with a sombre tone, feeling your heart hurt at the constant overthinking you have had to go through. "Things might have been simpler that way." 
"I know," Jungkook nods, not having a single word to defend himself with. 
You look at him a moment longer wondering if he would try providing  you with a reason for his lack of communication. When he doesn't, you're confused how you're supposed to perceive it. 
On one hand, you'd have liked for him to actually have a proper reason. On the other, you're sure Jungkook is aware of his mistakes and his lack of response somehow gives the impression that he's owning up to everything without making excuses. 
"But what's done is done and there's no changing it," you continue after a small sigh. "It's for the best that we move on from it."
Jungkook's heart shrinks. By moving on do you mean just never acknowledging the feelings you both share for each other? That's exactly what comes to his mind because you feeling the same way you did, despite the hurt he has caused you, sounds too good to be true. He cannot be shameless either to ask you about it directly. He will take whatever you will give him. 
Instead, he asks a question which he knows would eat him alive if he doesn't voice it. "Can you forgive me?" 
"I wouldn't have asked for the both of us to move on, if I hadn't already," and then you do something that makes Jungkook feel like a ton of bricks have been lifted off from his chest. You smile at him.
Forgiving Jungkook wasn't easy. You wanted to hold on to the anger because your pride was hurt and most importantly, you were scared of getting hurt again. But then you also had to think through things logically. 
Jungkook has never had it easy with fame. Nothing could have ever prepared him for the way he has always been under scrutiny and his sudden loss of control over his own life. With time, he learnt that it was for the best to not pay attention to the people who weren't even familiar with him. 
He could overlook and turn deaf to the hate that's thrown his way. However, his loved ones being targeted is something that fills him with guilt to an inexplicable amount. You have seen it yourself. 
The incident isn't that old. A year back, Jungkook had gone out with a bunch of his childhood friends. He was pictured closing the car door for one of them, who so happened to be a girl. That one single shot was enough for the media and internet to decide there must be something more than platonic going between the two. 
You remember the way Jungkook was so troubled and absolutely heartbroken with the hate and threats that were aimed at his friend, for something so simple and it was visible to everyone that he blamed himself for it.
You cannot imagine what kind of stones would be thrown at you if word got out. The information that you're his makeup artist would be a cherry on top. Gold digger, witch, slut, whore; some of the less colourful terms. 
Seeing the way Jungkook suffered, it made sense why he would be so scared to be open about his feelings. You could imagine yourself feeling the same way had it been you being in his place. Seeing someone you care for, getting hate that they absolutely don't deserve, is painful enough for one to believe that it's for the best to keep distance. 
You also imagined what you would have felt had Jungkook admitted his feelings and had told you about the fake dating. Yes, you'd have the knowledge that there was nothing real between him and Niki. However, you'd also have to see them all over the internet and watch people go on and on about how perfect they are. You'd be aware that Jungkook likes you, but you'd also be bitter about how the beginning of your relationship is marked with him publicly dating someone else. It's not exactly a nice feeling. 
One could argue that the way events have turned out, they aren't perfect either. But there's nothing going on between Jungkook and you. At least, not yet. 
That's one thing that you both need to talk about and you really want to clear out everything, at once. Who knows what miscommunication would occur if things were left unsaid, again? 
"I would never intentionally hurt you, Y/N,"Jungkook squirms a little in his seat, ignoring the absence of the weight that has been eating him alive for days. He thinks you're going easy on him and he thinks he doesn't deserve it. 
"I am choosing to trust your words," you reply, having a sense of the turmoil Jungkook seems to be going through. The fact that he is always hard on himself is not unknown to you. "All I ask from you is to not break my trust. And for you to accept that you do not have to burden yourself with responsibilities."
Jungkook knows it's hard for him to not feel like there's always a bunch of responsibilities on his shoulder. Especially when one moment of misjudgement can cause irreversible damage. Despite that, he feels a sense of warmth spread throughout his body at your words. 
"I'll try."
You shoot Jungkook another smile; the second one this evening and he can't help but think that you should really stop giving him hope.
"There's one more thing that we need to talk about," your cheeks turn red and much like Jungkook earlier, it's your turn to squirm in your seat. "You said something about liking me."
You feel awkward at the choice of your words but then you aren't brave enough to start by mentioning your note of confession. 
Jungkook's eyes turn as wide as saucers and his whole face flushes to match the shade of your cheeks. He really wasn't expecting for you to bring it up. "Umm yeah," he nods. 
You feel a spark of impatience and annoyance at his short response. You took it upon yourself to bring the topic to the table and he cannot just spill everything, already? Why make it more difficult for you? 
"Yeah…..so?" You look at him with your brows raised, trying your best to ignore the way you feel like a three year old shy girl, on the inside. 
"I–I do like you," he stutters and looks away, for the umpteenth time, unable to meet your eyes. 
Your heart takes a fucking long jump. Who would have thought Jeon Jungkook would be so shy about admitting his feelings? 
"What should we do about it?" You intentionally use the 'we' for Jungkook to catch the hint that you want to do something about it. 
But of course, he doesn't. 
He speaks sullenly, "I have lost the right to have a say in the matter." 
"I want you to have a say in the matter. Tell me, Jungkook, what do you want?" You refuse to let go of the conversation and for Jungkook to let his guilt swallow him. He messed up, there's no denying that. But you could always acknowledge the fact that his heart was in the right place. 
Feelings of frustration makes his throat clogged up . "I just want to go back and redo things in a different way."
"That's not possible. What do you want to do now?"
He knows what he wants but voicing it, feels being ungrateful towards your forgiveness. It feels like he's being greedy. "What I do want, feels like too much to ask for."
"You'll never know until you ask for it." 
He sighs and reminds himself that you're asking him about the romantic feelings he has admitted to harbouring towards you. He reminds himself to not be selfish and make it about his guilt. If you want to know, he will tell you and he will be honest about it. 
"I want to be with you," his admission is made in a small voice but it doesn't hide the clarity his words have. 
Your breath hitches and you feel the soft pitter patter of your heart that you had missed when he admitted his feelings for you the first time around. 
"When does this fake relationship of yours end?" 
"A month from now."
You nod. "A month from now, take me out on a date and we will see."
Jungkook's eyes snap to yours, not having expected you to speak those words. You shoot him a small smile before getting up and leaving the room. 
—-----------------------------------------------------
SIX MONTHS LATER
"I swear to god, if you don't stay still, I'll intentionally ruin your makeup."
Your threatening low tone goes in through one ear and comes out of the other. "You could never do that."
"Don't test my limits."
A pout makes its appearance. "But that's my favourite thing to do."
You sigh in both astonishment and in love. 
How do you manage to repeat the same routine with the same man everyday and never get tired of it? Maybe it has everything to do with the way your heart keeps stuttering around this man.
No, the man sitting in front of you, is not the global superstar Jeon Jungkook. 
The man sitting in front of you is your boyfriend, Jungkook. 
The official tag on your relationship was put four months ago, after a month of going out on dates. When you say going out, you mean staying in the hybe building and arranging dates in as innovative a way as one can. 
The month in which Jungkook had to pretend to be Nikki's boyfriend only proved to you why it would have been difficult for you had you and Jungkook actually been a thing at the time. It was already painful and as petty and irrational as it may sound, it also made you jealous when you would see articles of the two of them. You're not quite sure how humilated you would have felt if you two were to be dating at the time and to see people comment on how they are a match made in heaven.
That one month, for Jungkook, was a mix of everything. The beginning of the month came with constant doubts and shame where he wondered what he should do when the month is up. He wanted you but he didn't really think he deserved you. But then he had to make up his mind; he made a mistake and he always acknowledged that but it would be so incredibly foolish if he were to let that stop him from being with you. After a week or so, he had made up his mind. He messed up, but boy if he wasn't going to make up for it.  
That whole month was spent with him brainstorming ideas on how he can show his sincerity and be a better man. Somewhere along the line, he had opened up to Niki about it and there's just a hundred percent chance that if he's smiling wide in one of those paparazzi pictures, he's talking about you.
Jungkook has been nothing but the best boyfriend you could have ever asked for. Any hurt or doubt was washed away soon after the both of you started going out. Being with Jungkook was so much more than you could have ever imagined. 
A month after being together, you were back as Jungkook's make-up artist. It was the best way to go about it as it would keep the both of you away from suspicious eyes and give the both of you ample amount of time to spend with each other. 
You both are aware that at some point, you'd have to inform the agency of the nature of your relationship as that'd be better than them finding it out from other sources. You're not quite sure what would be left of your job, but Jungkook seems quite sure that you won't be fired and that the members together, would somehow manage the higher authorities to make their rules more flexible. 
Jungkook isn't worried about the consequences with hybe, but he still finds himself stressing about the day the news becomes public. That is where you reassure him, that whatever happens, you both will get through it, together. You also remind him to not fret about it too much, because there's a long way to go before things are made public. For the time being, it's just the two of you. 
"No wait, that's actually my second favourite thing," Jungkook corrects himself. "My top favourite might just be kissing you."
You fight the blush trying to make an appearance and ask, "might?"
"The last time you kissed me was ten minutes ago. Forgive me for forgetting what it was like to be kissed by you."
As cute and adorable as Jeon Jungkook might be in front of the cameras, you have recently learned that he's just as sly and playful when he wants to be. 
"Will you stay still if I kiss you?" 
"Kiss me first and then you shall have your answer." 
So you do. 
Your soft lips are welcomed eagerly by his and they move against each other, tenderly without a hint of rush. Your breaths mingle and soft sighs escape as your hands get tangled in his hair. 
When you part, there's only a hair's gap between the two of you, "So what's the verdict?" 
Jungkook's doe eyes appear dazed as he looks at you. "Well my brain has turned into a mush, so you can totally expect me to stay still."
You giggle and the sound of it warms Jungkook's heart like nothing ever has. 
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A/N: i was so anxious about making this so long especially the Taehyung part but then the Taehyung part is something that happened to me irl, so i also just wanted it to be as real as possible. For Jimin, it just didn't feel right for the reader to agree to go out or be with Jimin without him earning it. But then, it also didn't quite fit in this reaction thing, if that makes sense? If y'all want some good ol' grovelling from this Jimin in a one-shot i will see what I can come up with 😉.
That being said, let me know what you thought of this! (This really was a lot of work, so your words would be greatest source of encouragement and achievement for me). Also, if you like my work and wish to have access to all my works before anyone else, here's my patreon!
Hope you enjoyed reading this!
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back2bluesidex · 6 months
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25 and Virgin - PJM (18+)
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Pairing: Jimin X Fem!Reader
Theme: PWP, SMUT
Wordcount: 1.8k+
Summary: You are 25 and virgin but maybe your crush slash senior Park Jimin can change that tonight.
Warnings: Explicit sex, mentions of dying as a joke, a little bit of dirty talking, reader loses her virginity, sex on a balcony, oral sex (f. receiving), creampie, mentions of pain during sex, semi public sex, unprotected sex (wrap it!!), NSFW!! (let me know if there is more)
Minors are not allowed in this blog!!
A/N: Happy birthday to my home, Park Jimin. Can't believe he is 28? are you kidding me?
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"Were you serious earlier?" His voice rings behind you through the balcony door. 
If it's not the cold wind of night then it's definitely the mellow, smooth voice of Park Jimin that causes chills to run down your spine. 
Especially when you know what he is asking about.
"About.. what?" You speak without looking at him so that the red flush of embarrassment is not visible to him. 
Jimin takes a few steps and comes to stand beside you. 
His eyes find your face and if you are not completely wrong then those dip down to your lips. 
"You know what I am talking about but still if you want to hear me saying it then…" he continues smugly, "are you really a virgin?" 
Your tongue gets caught between your teeth as you curse your childish coworkers for dragging you into the childish game of truth and dare. 
You knew something like this would happen. But you couldn't say no, since you joined only two months ago and rejecting to be a part of stupid games of team-dinner-turned-norebang sessions is certainly rude. You couldn't risk your image even before you get the chance of making it. 
However, you expected them to show you the same level of respect and not poke you into your private boundaries. 
Guess what? You were wrong. 
Because the very first question landed on you was "what's your favorite sex position?" 
God! You can’t mold it into words how embarrassed you were to tell them that you haven't had sex yet. It’s only your fingers and you. 
Yes, you know you could have lied easily but what if they tease you endlessly after that? How will you react around them? And honestly, not a single position came in your head at that time for you to answer so you ended up being brutally honest. 
All of these would not matter much. 
All of these wouldn't matter at all if your crush slash senior Park Jimin wasn't sitting right across from you, if you didn't see his beautiful eyes getting wider with your answer, if he wouldn't come to find you here in the balcony.
What must he be thinking? Something like, you aren't hot enough to be bedded? God! You just want this ground to split in half and sink into it.
Jimin nudges your arm with his elbow pulling you out of your brooding session.
"I asked you something?" His voice is soft, there is no sense of mockery in it. So you decide to answer honestly.
"Yes." You sigh, "yes, I am 25 and virgin." 
You close your eyes as soon as the sentence dies. 
Jimin smiles, taking a lingering look on your figure. He still doesn't understand how the fuck no one has fucked you yet? You are so damn beautiful and that body is something anyone would die to explore. Maybe he would too, only if he wasn’t so against fucking inexperienced people. 
"Y/N, it's alright. There's no need to be embarrassed. It's your life, you have the right to live however you want." He places a hand on your shoulder. 
If your heart takes up a faster pace, then you don't want to dwell on it.
"It's not my choice, Jimin. I just- I just never found anyone.. you know." You stare down at the cars rushing by through the busy streets of Seoul. 
“But you have had boyfriends, right?” Jimin asks, you somehow feel him standing closer than before. 
“One boyfriend back in highschool and we never pushed anything past foreplay and then I got busy with uni and internships. So.. stuff never happened. At this point it feels like no one would want a 25 year old virgin. Everyone would want a partner who at least has some experience.” you sigh again. 
“That’s not true. Anyone would want you and I am not saying this to comfort you, but from the perspective of a man.” Jimin squeezes your shoulder. 
You divert your eyes from the road below and look at him. 
Park Jimin is beautiful but he looks extra beautiful tonight standing here with you. 
His soft black hair falls onto his dark eyes, those soft plump lips invites you to bite them, his muscles and manly chest heave with every breath he takes. You lose yourself a little. You get drunk by him so much that you find your mouth running ahead of your mind.
“Anyone would? You too?” You take a tentative step towards him. 
A flash of playfulness flashes through his face, “I would love to, darling. But I don’t fuck virgins.” 
That’s it. That’s the rejection of a lifetime you have been waiting for. You took a step back just as you took it ahead. 
What were you even thinking? Popular Park Jimin would want to sleep with someone as inexperienced as you? How bold! Now your embarrassment has reached its peak. You are not only a virgin now but a rejected virgin. 
Fucking hell! You want to jump off this balcony, break your head and die. 
But before that you should apologize of your unnecessary boldness, “I’m so-” 
“I would love to eat you out though. Bet your untouched pussy tastes amazing.” Jimin cuts you off and cages you between your arms, “do you want me to eat you here in the balcony?”. 
Blood rushes to your cheeks and flood rushes to your cunt as you try to contemplate what Jimin is offering, “what-”
“Yes or no, Y/N?” Jimin cuts you off again. 
“Yes!” you reply without giving it another thought. You may not get this offer ever again. 
“Good girl.” Jimin smirks at you deviliously as he sinks down on his knees before you.
“But what if someone sees us?” your heart thumps in your chest. 
“Shut up and part your legs for me.” Jimin orders but there is no bite in his tone. You oblige readily. 
He hikes up your skirt and places a few kisses on your thighs. You feel yourself leaking more and more as he inches closer to your cunt. 
“Fuck. you smell so good, sweetheart!” Jimin sniffs your arousal through the cotton of your panty. 
If he says he had never thought of fucking you raw, then that will be a lie. The reality is that you caught his eyes the moment you were assigned under him. It’s been only two months so he couldn’t have his way with you yet. But he never imagined you would be a virgin and he would get a chance of tasting you like this. 
He would love to fuck you too but at first you need to have a basic experience, because he is way too wild for someone so inexperienced as you. 
“J-Jimin, please.” you mutter and Jimin swears it’s the sweetest thing he has ever heard.
“Be patient, sweetheart.” he replies before hiking your skirt further with one of his hands and tugging down your panty with another one. 
You knock the piece of cloth out of your ankles. 
Even though it’s dark on the balcony, Jimin can clearly see your glinting pussy under the moonlight. You are nothing short of divine. 
He grabs your left thigh and hooks it on his shoulder, parting your pussy deliciously for his eyes and mouth. 
And without so much as a breath, he dives down. 
The first drag if his tongue is slow and teasing, it knocks all of the available air out of your lungs. You see stars above your head. So, this is how it feels to have your cunt eaten?
Jimin hums at your taste and then grazes your clit with his teeth. Parting your folds with his fingers, he latches his plump lips to your nub and starts sucking wildly. 
“Oh-Oh Jim-Jimin'' You struggle to breathe, mind going numb in an instant. 
And then you feel his fingers probing into your entrance. He invades your walls with not one but two of his fingers at once.
“Fuckkkk” you curse. Your ears take in the lewd sound of your wet pussy being sucked, licked and fingered. 
Jimin is not doing any better. He knew you would taste delicious but he never imagined you would taste this addictive. 
His lips, tongue and fingers can’t get enough of you. Damn! His dick needs you. 
He needs to be inside you to insatiate the beast you just woke up by being this addictive. 
“Jimin-Jimin I may be-” you try to find your voice, your knuckles are going white with the dead grip you have on the balcony railing. 
Your eyes start rolling back but then you feel everything feeling low and empty. 
Jimin detaches his face from your core and looks up at you, “close? But we don’t have time for multiple orgasms. I need you to cum on my cock.” 
He stands up and starts undoing his belt. 
You don’t know whether you should praise his beauty, which has increased by tenfold as he is drenched in your juices or the taut muscle of his torso or the beautiful dick that springs out of his briefs ready to ruin you. 
Jimin grips your thigh again, encircles that around his torso and lines his cock in your entrance. 
“It will hurt a little in the beginning but soon it will feel good, okay?” He says softly, removing a lone strand of hair from your face.
“But I thought you don’t fuck virgins?” you huff. 
“You are fucking addicting, Y/N. I can’t control myself.” He breathes as he pushes the tip inside you. 
He is almost midway through your cunt when you feel a painful stretch, your face contorts as a result but you want him to go on. 
“You okay? Should I continue?” Jimin questions, you nod voicelessly. 
And within a few seconds he is completely in. He gives you the time to adjust before starting to move. 
Once you have managed yourself and the pain, you ask him to move. 
It’s painful, overwhelmingly so. But the way Jimin groans and grunts tells you that you have a weird power over him. 
“So fucking tight. Lord! You will be the death of me.” Jimin groans again as he thrusts slowly. 
Soon you feel the pain fading behind an immense pleasure. 
You moan out loud as Jimin gradually increases his pace. For a moment there are only sounds of heavy breathing, you two moaning each other’s names, cursing and skin slapping. Jimin’s dick feels amazing against the tight walls of your cunt, so much so that you start feeling heat in your stomach. 
“You are squeezing the hell out of me, Y/N!” Jimin growls again. 
“I-I’m close.” You say somehow.
“Cum on my cock baby. Creame it!” and you do. You cum and the orgasm is nothing you have had with the help of your fingers. 
“Fuck fuck fuck!” Jimin shouts in your neck as he cums inside you following your suite. His white hot semen runs down your thigh and drops on the floor. 
You are trying to find your breath and wit, when you heard Jimin say, “Round two at my place?”
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Taglist:
@phenomenalgirl9 @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @soraviie @sukunabitch @chimchimmarie @coffeedepressionsoup @meowstake @vonvi-blog @nochuel @chimmisbae
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guqwrvte · 1 year
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⨽ title: cherry balm
⨽ summary: you start using a new lip balm and jimin loves the taste.
⨽ pairing: jimin x reader
⨽ genre: fluff, established relationship
⨽ warnings: kissing
⨽ word count: 891
⨽ a/n: if you cringe towards the end forgive me. writing kissing scenes is a struggle for me lol.
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There was a soft smile on Jimin's face as he watched you move around his kitchen. 
"Where do you keep your big bowls again?" You asked as you closed another cupboard. 
"In the bottom cupboard to your left," he said, and you hummed in response before opening it and taking out a bowl. 
He loved days like this. Days where'd you decide to come to his place and spend the night. 
"What're you making?" he asked as you began to set the ingredients on the counter. 
"Chocolate chip cookies," you told him. "I don't think I've made them for you before."
"You haven't," he said, getting up from the bar stool and making his way to the island. "Do you want me to help with anything?"
"Remember what happened the last time you lent me a hand?" You asked, pouring flour into a measuring cup. 
The last time you were here, you made cupcakes. 
What started off as playfully putting flour on each other's noses and cheeks turned into you being covered in flour. 
"I don't want to clean up a mess like that again..." he chuckled. "I promise this time I'm going to behave."
"I'll let you help me put them into trays," you smiled, causing him to playfully pout. 
"Please?" He asked, wrapping his arms around you and resting his chin on your shoulder. 
"I won't be able to move properly like this, Jimin," you huffed, trying to get the man off you. "I said you can help me put them in the trays. I'll even let you try the batter."
He only hummed in response before burying his head in the crook of your neck. 
One thing Jimin loved about you was your love for vanilla. It was your favourite scent and flavour. 
The majority of the baked goods you made were vanilla, and almost everything you used smelled like vanilla. You shampoo, your body wash, your perfumes, everything. 
Jimin's favourite was your lip balm. God, how he loved the Oh So Heavenly vanilla lip balm you used. 
"Do you want a chocolate chip?" You asked, popping one into your mouth and humming at the taste. 
Jimin lifted his head and nodded, opening his mouth and saying: "Ah."
You smiled before popping two into his mouth. "You know you could learn to make these if you just focused on what I was doing. So you don't always have to wait for me to come over for you to have something baked."
"Even if I learnt... I don't think they'd taste as good as yours," he sighed, letting go of you. 
"You'll be using the same recipe, so they'd definitely taste like mine," you said. "Here, you can taste the batter and tell me how it is."
You handed Jimin a teaspoon of the batter. "Please tell me if it's too sweet."
When Jimin put the teaspoon in his mouth, his eyes widened at the taste. "If this is how the batter tastes like this, I can't wait for the cookies."
"Is it too sweet or not?" You asked, taking the spoon and tossing it in the sink. 
"It tastes just fine to me," he smiled, giving you a quick kiss. 
"Don't kiss me when you have batter on your lips," you whined, licking your lips. 
"I can't see my lips," he chuckled, licking his lips to get the batter off. 
Jimin's face turned in confusion as he licked his lips again. 
Something was different, and he couldn't put his finger on it. 
"It's off," you told him, walking to the oven to get the tray. 
"Baby," he said, and you hummed. "Can you kiss me again?"
"In the kitchen?" you asked with a frown, placing the tray on the counter. 
"Relax," Jimin told you, knowing how you felt about being intimate in the kitchen. You were okay with hugs and pecks but nothing more. "I'm just asking for a kiss. Nothing more."
"Fine," you huffed before walking to him and kissing him again. 
Jimin's hands made their way around your waist and pulled you closer when your lips landed on his again. 
They were still sweet with the taste of chocolate from the chocolate chip batter. But instead of your sweet bubble balm, he could faintly taste something new. He wasn't sure what flavour this was he loved it. 
Jimin suddenly lifted you up onto the counter, causing you to gasp. With your lips parted, he slipped his tongue inside your mouth. 
He stood between your legs, a hand in your hair as you continued to kiss him. 
"You changed your lip balm," he breathed when you eventually pulled away, your bodies still close. 
"Yeah," you whispered, catching your breath. "I couldn't find another vanilla bubble balm, so I had to get something else. Does it taste weird?"
"Not at all," he told you. "What flavour is it?"
You unconsciously licked your bottom lip. "I think it's cherry."
"Cherry?" he asked, lips brushing against yours, and you hummed in response. "Keep using it for a while."
And his lips were pressed against yours again. He wasn't sure if it was because he was different compared to what he was used to, but the taste of your lips was almost intoxicating. 
He couldn't think about anything other than how he really hoped you'd use this cherry balm for a while. 
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thvlouvre · 9 months
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[One-shot]
Little Mouse — Park Jimin (Part 2)
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✔︎ Summary: the principal's son, the reason why you can't enjoy school and the reason why you can't leave it finds out you're having a date with somebody that isn't him. ✔︎ Word Count: 8.1k ✔︎ Trope: Bully Yandere Jimin x Chubby brazilian oc, enemies to lovers (?), smut ✔︎ Warnings: evil teenagers once again, slut shaming:(, dub con (hello lord, it's me again), primal sex, forced and unconsented voyeurism, oral sx (m&f receiving), vginal fingering, orgsm denial, exhibitionism, public sx, dirty talk, soft role play, pet calling, switch roles (both are sub&dom), humiliation kink, degradation, praise, penetration, supplication, delusional behaviour, jealousy, possessive over-protective jimin, and I think that's it... oopsi. ✔︎ thvlouvre's note: let's pretend this didn't took me YEEAARRRS to finish, but I'm finally happy with it, I swear I wrote like ten different versions of it until this one beat the others, I still feel insecure with my smut scenarios, and this part 2 is basically jimin and y/n being hrny rabbits and y/n getting revenge... anyways, enjoyyy 💋 ✔︎ Songs: i was never there by the weeknd. love is a bitch by two feet. ✔︎ LITTLE MOUSE PART 1 | MASTERLIST.
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“Don’t hurt him.” Was the first thing that came out of your mouth.
“I won’t” he leaned closer to your lips  “I won’t, unless you don’t do something for me” his lowered chest voice was velvety against your ear skin “Met me at the lab at four, don’t be late little mouse.”
Jimin knew exactly what he was doing, he had everything planned. At the end of all, he was a man that always got what he wanted, and he had never wanted anything more than he wanted you. There was this feeling inside his chest, something fiery and energetic burning inside his chest that sparked every time he saw you, something he had never felt before. It was filled with need and angst, but he wouldn’t describe it as love.
Against the common believes, Jimin did knew how love felt like, he had loved people in his life, and he knows love is a pleasing sensation to have. He loved his mother as long as she allowed him to love her, until she went away from him and his father. He loved his father until he realized his dad saw in him the remembrances of the faded love he used to have with his mother, and took all that resentment out with his son. He loved school, and the feeling of being the best at something, being the first of the class would always made him smile, until classes got easy and teachers were boring.
Jimin loved many thing in his life, but the one thing he loved the most was pain.
He adored giving pain to others, being the cause of somebody’s suffering and fear, being dominant and in control of the people’s shivering minds. So he knew very well that whatever he was feeling for you, it wasn’t love. Because he did have this need for seeing you suffer, and with tears in your eyes, but he also wanted the tears to be from pleasure.
Maybe it was just that he liked you; he liked you and the shape of your body. And your well-mannered being. And because he liked you he wanted you as his personal sex toy, his human stress ball. Or so, that’s what he thought.
Inside his limited mind, he didn't realize he actually loved the idea of you giving him pain. Like he didn’t enjoy to its fullest to hurt you, he didn’t love you. The possibility of the object of his deepest desires giving him the sensation he loved the most was blocked. It should always be him the one giving it, the one contemplating the other suffering, not the other way around, right?
When you arrived to the lab, the preoccupation overshadowed your face. Your pretty eyes were frowned and your smile was no way to be seen, but your posture, the way your back hunches gave him hope, as if you were already digesting the fact that he owned you and that he will win this battle. You looked defeated and he loved it. 
Damn, he was loving too many things lately. He was saying that word too often.
You dropped your backpack, the tiredness drifting in your face.
“Okay, speak Jimin” you started, you made your mind and decided that whatever he wanted from you he would get it, if that meant you could be free from him and get sweet Tete away from his filthy hands. “What do you want me to do? Spill it.”
“Wow, not even a ‘good afternoon, Jimin, how has been your day’ or something?”
“What is it?” you insisted not hearing his mocks.
He walked around you, scanning your thick waist and virtues and wondering how could you not know what was it what he wanted. There were two options; you were stupid to not see what you did to him or you ignoring how he felt about you. He hoped you were just stupid.
“It’s a couple of things that you need to do” he murmured, cherishing himself with the freedom of stare at your back and your ass.
“What is it?” you started to feel uncomfortable, but not the type of uncomfortable that made you feel sick when someone checked you out shamelessly, it was the type of comfortless that made  your heartbeat raise and your skin sweat.
“First, I want you to stop seeing Taehyung” He demanded, remembering how he stared at the two kissing on the coffee shop. He remembered how much he wanted to be Taehyung, him, Park Jimin wanting to be somebody else.
“But I don’t want to stop seeing Taehyung, he’s my frien”- you replied, worried because you knew that inside Jimin’s madness, there was no chance you could make him forget about your new friend and don’t hurt him.
“He’s nothing” he said, his eyes connecting with yours when he finally stopped walking around you  “I am the only thing you should be concerned about, me. I am the one who tells what you do, what to feel, what to think and I want you to stop seeing him, if you don’t I will hurt him” he cupped your face with both of his hands your height difference hitting high when he made both of your noses touch by the tips and his breath collided with your skin.
“Do you understand?”
“No.” you still found strength to talk back.
“You don’t?” he arched a brow, smiling cause he found your audacity funny.
“I said I don’t understand.” You smiled back, because you knew what you were going to say will piss him horribly “I don’t understand why would you care so much about someone you find disgusting” you spitted in between teeth, standing on your tippy toes to reach him “I won’t stop seeing Taehy-“
He crashed his lips together with yours because if he hears that damned name coming out of your mouth once again instead of his he would commit homicide. You tried to fight him, you tried to remove his hands away from your cheeks but the harder you tried the stronger he held you.
He set your mouth free with a loud ‘pop’ after sucking your upper lip harshly, a thread of saliva connecting the faded kiss and he couldn’t resist the idea of licking it. So, he brings your face closer and his tongue licked your lips clean. He did it nice and slow, as if he truly enjoyed the taste of your mouth and for a wrong and very questionable reason, you found that… attractive?
“Whether you think you have a choice on that or not, you will not see him again.” And he walked with you to the teacher’s desk, pushing your ass to bounce back against the desk’s line so your pelvis would match his crotch.
“Whatever it takes, uh? I haven’t forgotten that” he spread your legs wide open and placed himself in between them, your hands leaning against the wood because the strength of his upper body was so aggressive you could fall off the table if you didn’t hold to something.
“Jimin what are you doing? I don’t want to do this, I don’t even like you” you tried to fight a little, to make your resistance seemed a little less weak, to appear like a woman who could fight against her needs, even if in that moment you were just a febrile little horny girl.
Maybe it was Jimin’s perfume, the mint and the cigarettes smell that flooded your senses as soon as he came closer to you, the delicious mix that made your mouth salivate and your eyes close wanting to sink in his sweat and swim in his essence forever. Maybe it was his raspy and firm hands that were running up and down all over your body; on your back that was arched pushing out your clothed tits against his chest, his finger tracing the line of your column and squeezing your thighs under the uniform skirt.
Maybe it was just him, and the white line above his upper lips you lowkey always wanted to kiss, in your imagination you thought they tasted like white chocolate, smooth as candy. Whatever it was, it was enough of it to make you feel adored and wanted. Your knees were shaking and your lips were looking for his, but he nailed his head in the space were your neck met your shoulders and he started to sniff loudly.
“What are you doing there?” you asked, holding him by his nape with your right hand.
“Smelling.” And he inhaled again, and in that moment you understood that it wasn’t his smell, nor his hands or lips; it was the way he was sniffing your collarbone line as if it was a line of coke, sucking your perfume so desperately like a drug addict that has been deprived of its poison for years. You didn’t know what was in the air that day, that had you acting so out of yourself, so hot and needy but the only thing you could do was to open your legs wider to him and hold him stronger.
When you let your head back down to enjoy the sensation of his nose tickling you in your neck, he grabbed your head and made you watch him.
“Stand.” He commanded. Grabbing you by the soft flesh of your hips, his fingers tangling around the elastic of your underwear. You followed him, your ass cheeks were burning red from the blood accumulation of been sited on the desk so harshly. Your pink underwear was on display for him, your skirt rolled up around your waist where he had tucked it in for better access.
He kissed you again, seductive and slow and with every move of his tongue and his lips you could feel a border been torn down, melting in his arms.
Without breaking the kiss, he took off his jacket and untied his tie. He untucked his uniform shirt and looked at you when he noticed you haven’t taken off anything. He guessed you were the type that liked to follow orders in bed.
“Take off your jacket.”
“No” you laughed and by this point, even if he could tell you were willing and aroused, you had something for denying him things. He smiled because you were giving him reasons to punish you.
“When I tell you to take off your jacket, you take off your jacket” he grabbed your jacket and teared it apart, throwing it to the floor. “When I tell you to open your shirt, you open your shirt” he ripped the buttons of your white shirt, making them fall apart; your pink bra displaying to him. He closed his eyes and licked his lips when he got to see the fullness of your breast up close. “And when I tell you to undo my belt and suck my dick, you go down and suck my dick” he pushed by your shoulders, and made you fall with his erection in your face.
You were insecure, because you have done this once or twice, but not under these circumstances. Not with someone that has been tormenting you during months, not with someone that has been waiting every minute to see what you do wrong and mocked about it, but for some reason the idea of this, felt… cathartic. There was no lower point than this, and somehow you still found the strength to like it, you just needed to get over it and move on.
You unbuttoned his pants, and kissed his bulge above the boxer’s fabric, and just in case a little small part of you was still doubting if continuing with this madness, the whimpers and soft moans that came out of his mouth pushed you to lick it about his underwear.
“Shit, ___, you should see how hot you look with your tits out and you mouth in my cock”
You undressed his cock and took a deep breath, trying to convince yourself you were doing this because you wanted him to finally leave you alone, and not because you liked him, not because you wanted him.
Jimin on the other hand was ecstatic, he had finally broken you and his fantasies were you pleasing him on your knees and show your body to him were becoming real, the dreams of having you as his slave and finally giving you the ultimate dose of pain.
You sucked him just like he kissed you, nice and slow, taking your time because if you were going to do this you would make sure this was the best blow job this man ever get in his life, so the frustration of not having you again would torture him for the rest of his life and haunt him, even after you were on the other side of the world, back in your hometown.
Unfortunately, you were unaware of a third presence on the room. Standing outside the lab’s door, watching through the window was the shy and boring boy you were having your secret affair. You could not watch him because your back was facing the door, but Jimin could. After a long suck you gave him on the tip of his cock, he opened his eyes surprised and he could saw him.
Taehyung was standing astonished, sad, and disappointed, but still there was this lustful look in his eyes. He was hating the fact that he found the scene extremely seductive, you on your knees pleasuring him with your mouth, but it broke his heart it wasn’t him the one that was standing in front of you, in fact he was angry because it was no other than the scumbag of Park Jimin. How could you? After all the pain and the torments that man and his friends had caused you, you still allowed him to use you for his pleasure like a whore, why?
Taehyung’s feet were glued to the floor, because even if he didn’t want to look anymore, he couldn’t move. Jimin smiled victoriously, eyeing Taehyung through the door when he cupped your cheeks softly and said something Taehyung could not hear, but it might be something sweet because you responded physically with increasing the speed of your mouth and Jimin moaned, no, he shouted your name loud enough so Taehyung could hear in spite the door. Jimin had left a note on Taehyung’s locker that asked him to meet at the lab at 4. Jimin had tried to imitate your handwriting the best he could, but it was so feminine he didn’t think it would work. He guessed Taehyung was so stupid he didn’t notice the difference between your sweet lettering and his harsh handwriting.
“Faster baby, use your tongue I’m so close” he encouraged you, his thumbs caressing the skin of your jaw almost as if he was grateful this was happening. You on the other hand, knew you red lipstick was ruined and probably spread all over your face. Even his penis had red marks on its longitude, and he didn’t care, it was the hottest thing that had ever happened to him. Having sex on school with teachers on the hallways and somebody shamelessly watching the two of you.
“Show him, sweetie” he moaned but then he hurried to correct himself, even if you were so busy to pay attention “Show me how good you suck my dick clean, how much you want me” Jimin managed to say in between his suffocated moans and hearing that made you stop, and something clicked. You did not want him, you didn’t even like him, you wouldn’t even talk to the man outside school. Yes, the situation per se was exciting and erotic, but he was just part of the scenario.
You stood up, his dick bounced and cum drops spilled on the floor.
“What? What are you doing?” he asked breathlessly.
“Leaving.” You cleaned your mouth as much as you could and spitted the saliva to his designer shoes, before he could react and dress himself, you picked your backpack from the floor and stared to run forgetting about your jacket and your ripped shirt.
“What the fuck, ___? I haven’t come” he tried to grab you by you elbow but you were faster and you dodged it like a bullet. He hurried to get himself dressed again and pick both of your jackets, trying to collocate his erection back on his pants again but it wasn’t easy.
“I don’t care if you came or not, I don’t want you, I never will this was just me being angry” you run down the lab to the floor and opened the door running away from your stupid and horny decisions, just to find Taehyung on the hallway with tears in  his eyes and a disappointed look on his face.
“Taehyung…” you tried to speak but the words dried out on your throat and the thoughts stopped running in your mind, what could you do? Explain it to him? He saw it all apparently “Is not what you think it is, he- he forced me!” you tried to explain to him, but it came out wrongly. Taehyung arched his brown not believing you, because from what he saw you seemed more that willing to blow him.
“He coaxed me! You got to believe me!” you tried to come closer but Taehyung stepped back, looking at your ripped shirt and your breast. “Why would you let him do that? After all he had put you through.” His voice was so soft and calm, the sadness filtering in his words and just when you were about to tell him that Jimin threatened to hurt him the monster appeared in  the hallway behind you with both of your jackets on his left hand and his backpack on his shoulder.
“You forgot your jacket, little mouse” his mellow voice sounded from behind you, and you felt his arms surround you from your back in a hug. He buried his head in your neck and kissed it devotedly, adding more salt to Taehyung's wound.
“Ugh, get off me!” you push him aside and face him, knowing he had something to do with Taehyung knowing the two of you would be there. “It was you, wasn’t it? You told him to come!”
“Honey, I don’t know what you’re talking about” he played dumbed, his big eyes shone with innocence, and you felt disgusted, you couldn’t believe this was the same creature you were eating alive five minutes ago.  
When you turned around Taehyung was half the way to the door and leaving the building.
“Taehyung, don’t!” you run but Jimin catches you and pulled you closer to him. You started to cry, tears falling down your cheeks and even when Jimin was mad as fuck because he didn’t come in your mouth, he clean them and kissed your wet eyelids, hugging you. Jimin himself didn’t notice he was being tender with someone for the first time ever.
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Jimin stared at his room’s celling later that day. He was wearing just his boxers and he had been pleasuring himself for the last two hours, remembering how good your mouth felt around him. Just the memory of your pink 32D bra cups bouncing with every breath made him hard, three times in the evening.
He couldn’t stop thinking about the situation, and why he wasn’t furious with you for frustrating him. If it was another girl, he would have reacted aggressive and obnoxious, but he never stopped to think how would he react because with every girl he had been, he always prioritize his pleasure over theirs. Now you just not let him come undone, but you deny him and push him away after.
It was all so confusing, he thought he had finally breaked you and made you like him, when in fact you legit told him to his face you didn’t care if he came or not, you told him you didn’t want him. He knew he has been dick to you during the past months, and unconsciously he was the reason you were getting beat, but he thought that the sparkle he felt every time he saw was mutual. He was also surprised you still thought he found you disgusting, when it was the total opposite. He found you stunning, sensual and so bratty.
Ugh, what had he done?
The next days at  school became a battle for you as you tried to reach Taehyung and talk to him about Jimin’s extortion and how you wanted to protect him, but every time he saw you on the hallways he ran away in the other directions.
A week later, you started to notice people started to look at you differently, not with disgust or fear like they have before. They were looking at you morbidly, shamelessly. You could even hear them laugh and gossip after you walk pass them on the school’s hallways and the cafeteria.
“Did you hear her and Jimin are banging?” a female voice said not so discreetly.
“I don’t think so, maybe it was something she invented herself” a boy responded.
“I know, she’s not Jimin’s type, she’s out of shape”
“Besides, Jimin has Meeyon why would he pick her?”
You started to felt anxious, how did everybody knew about your shameful episode with Jimin on the lab? Maybe this was his ultimate prank on you, his ultimate humiliation. Maybe he recorded it and he was sharing it social media. You started to feel panicked, your tray with food shaking on the middle of the tables where you were looking for an empty space to sit and eat.
But the whole room went silent when a senior throwed your lunch to the floor and pulled you by your clothes with his closed fists, face too close to yours.
“Is it true Jimin is fucking you?” he asked shamelessly in front of everybody.
“What? No!”
“Taehyung is saying that” you felt your heart broke in a million pieces when the guy dropped the name of the one person who knew about the incident besides you and Jimin. “What? He did not say that-?”
“He is saying that, I guess I want a private session at the lab as well”
“Eww! Get off me, please” you started to push him, looking for someone to help you get away from him.
“I thought Jimin hated you, turns out he just wanted you to be his who-“
The guy couldn’t finish his sentence because a strong hand was grabbing him by the tie and tangling it around his neck, squeezing hard. Jimin throwed the idiot to the floor in four and pulled the tie up making him seemed like a dog.
“Careful with what you touch, asshole” he said and the whole cafeteria gasped with shock just like you did. Jimin placed his boot on the guy’s back and leaned his weight on him “Was he bothering you?” he asked making eye contact with you, his voice less aggressive, almost concerned when it came to you.
“Jimin leave him alone, he’s getting red” you said trying to see if the boy was breathing but Jimin put the tie higher, so it became tighter around his neck.
“It’s what he deserves, he called you a whore” Jimin started to roll the tie around his fist and pulled his neck closer to his ear so the human trash could hear him “Why do you care if someone is fucking her or not?” he whispered, even when everybody was silent just the poor idiot could hear him.
“Do you like her or what?” even when the boy could not answer Jimin took that for a ‘yes’ and he was pissed at that, how many people in that school wanted you? “I’m gonna take that as a yes, but you getting any near her it’s a no if you want to keep breathing”
Jimin saw the fear in your eyes and he understood why you didn’t like him back. You feared him, he just needed to show you his tender side and be careful with you, then you would want him. “Well, I guess I have to make you breath” Jimin dropped the tie and the guy untied it as fast as he could, coughing in relief and crawling.
“Apologize.” Jimin kicked him on the ribs and he cried in pain crawling away from you “I said apologize! Head on the floor, on your knees right now” Jimin lost his patience and threw him to the floor in front of you, placing his boot on the boy’s back once again to push his body down. “Lower, ask her for forgiveness”
“I’m so sorry” the guy shouted, his nose closed from all the crying “I’m very sorry, I shouldn’t have done that, I’m so so sorry” Jimin stared at you, waiting for your response. If you said you were okay with his mediocre apology he would let him go, if not, the miserable idiot would not leave the school walking.
“If you are not satisfied he will crawl all over the court yard until you are.” Something inside you got amused with that perspective, because it was always you the one been humiliated and mistreated, you wanted to see someone suffering for the first time. But if someone was going to crawl was Jimin himself.
“It’s okay, let him go” you whispered and Jimin grabbed him by the t-shirt and made him stand.
“Fucking go, just go!” Jimin pushed  him out, and he noticed how deadly silent the cafeteria was, all of the eyes staring at the two astonished “What the fuck you all are looking at? Mind your business” and with that, everybody acted like nothing happened, the noise returning and the food line moving forward again.
You let your food to the side and walk out the cafeteria, with Jimin following your fee.
“___! Where are you going sweetheart?” he grabbed you softly by one of your wrists and made you look at him, there was still this unhappy expression on your face he didn’t like. “What is it? You’re still pissed? I told you if you weren’t happy with his-“
“It’s not him that I am angry with!” you dropped your hand away from his, you didn’t know who you needed to hate that moment. Taehyung for spreading the rumors and made everyone obsessed with your sexual life, or Jimin who coaxed you and seduce you to have sex in a public space. “Have you heard what they’re saying?” you cried, breaking in front of him once more.
“About the rumors Taehyung is spreading? Yes, I have heard them.”
“Why would he do that?” you pressed your face in the palm of your hands trying to stop the tears.
“Because he is salty and jealous.” He answered, hands in his pockets.
“I need to get him back” you murmured to yourself, but Jimin heard it. His eyes widened furiously, oh how much he hated that idiot. Gladly, he took the advantage before you could do something stupid like coming back to that idiot’s arms. He made his father end Taehyung’s scholarship and made him go back to his old public high school.
“Oh, didn’t you hear’” his devilish tone was back again, his mellow tone he was lately using with you gone “Taehyung’s internship is over, he’s back at his old school.”
“Since when?” you asked incredibly sad and shocked .
“Yesterday, his last day here was yesterday” he tried to contain his grin but he was so happy Taehyung was out of your life, he could finally have you all for yourself.
“He didn’t even say goodbye.” You broke again and he hugged you, your wet eyes wetting his shirt but he couldn’t care, not in a moment where you were hugging him back and he caressed your hair tenderly to comfort you.
“Of course he didn’t, he was angry and immature, he didn’t deserve you” he whispered sweetly, poisoning your ear. Intoxicating your mind with his sweet whispers of consolation. He drove you home that day, the incident in the cafeteria and Taehyung’s betrayal left you drained.
The truth was that Taehyung's intershipe didn't end, Jimin spoke with his father and told him he was spreading fake rumors about the other interchange girl's reputation. Sexual rumors that involve him and the foreign girl.
"The brazilian?" his father spoke indiferent not even looking at his son's eyes, whatever that was displaying on his laptop being important. "Yes I remember her, many students complained about her sports uniform"
"Taehyung is harassing her, and because she didn't liked him back he's spreading fake rumors of her and I" his father sent him back to the old school with a misconduct record. Jimin on the other hand, had made the rumors himself, leaving an not so anonymous note in the school complaint box where he detailed the explosive moment between the two after classes inside the school instalations, signing as Taehyung.
Days went by, and somehow, Jimin became strangely attached to you, like a lapdog that seemed lost and helpless. He started to sit next to you during lunch, he would no longer steal from your food. One day he surprised you with a strawberry milk bottle.
“What’s this?” you asked annoyed.
“Strawberry milk.” He responded thinking to himself this had happened before.
“I know this is strawberry milk, what do you want me to do with it?”
“This is the first bottle of many I have to compensate, it was a long time of me acting like an idiot.” You were so helpless with everything that was happening, he took the chance to grab your hand with his and kiss it tenderly, to set the promise.
Three days after that, you opened your locker and found a bucket of red roses and a small gift bag with a handwritten note.
“I know I made you feel the total opposite, but you are the most exquisite woman  I’ve ever seen, I love the color red on you, but I love it more when you paint it on me. Yours, Jimin.”
You open the gift, and you saw three new lipstick for you. The same brand, same tone you would always use. Did he memorize the tone or did he checked your makeup bag? You were intrigued, because when he drove you home the other day after the cafeteria incident, he didn’t even ask you where you lived, he just drove while you were lost in your mind and when you least noticed he was parking in front of your building. 
The gifts and the public love affections kept coming. After the lab semi intercouse, Jimin started acting as if you were something, he started to act like a boyfriend. You were so shocked and confused by his behavior that you would literally ignore him, if he sat beside you in the library you would put your headphones on and focus on your homework. If he waited for you after classes to drive you home you would hurry up to the bus station and get on the first bus that took you far from there. 
The thing was that he was always there. For every time you would try to ignore him, he would remain stuck to your side like a puppy and people still noticed it. They were already making assumptions about you and him officially dating since Jimin had never, ever been like this with anybody. Not even Meeyon, who was his regular girl for a long time. 
The gifts didn’t stop coming as well. Everyday you would find something new hiding in your locker. Monday, he left you the lipsticks. Tuesday he left you a red pair of heels and a very explicit letter about how he imagined you wearing them. Wednesday he left you cherry earrings that were exactly just like the ones you would wear but those had embedded crystals. Thursday he left you red velvet cupcakes and expensive chocolates. Friday a red dress that was too tight and too short to be wear on a school event.
You didn’t understand him. You knew he wanted you, he craved you deeply, beyond his understatement and apparently he found you attractive in spite of all the time he humiliated you because of your body. If it was all about the desire, why would he be acting like a boyfriend with you? He already got to humiliate you one last time and making you blow him. 
Yes. You remember he didn’t finish, but still. Actually it would make more sense if he was furious with you, so angry he shouldn’t even care about you, but there he was, glued to you like a goddamn sticker. It was almost like a challenge for him, you felt, your rejection making him more persistent. 
You decided to end his suffering and yours, by giving him a note during history class. A pink post-it arrived to his seat that said ‘meet me after classes, same time, same place'. You could see his side profile smiling like a fool when he read it and he thought he was progressing with you. 
Your sentence came by the time the clock hit 4. 
But for a reason you didn’t feel any fear. Somehow, Jimin did not scared you anymore. You could finally see him for what he was, an infatuated boy who didn’t have the means or the sensibility to say he liked you, and because he couldn't he decided to bully you instead.
You wanted to play hard and dirty at least once like he did, and be heartless just like he has been with you. You found that funny and sad. Pathetic even. You wanted to give him wings and cut them off, you wanted to see him fall to the ground with his broken back and bleeding face asking mercy and not showing any of it. You were leaving very soon, it wasn’t like you would see him again. 
You decided to return to him every drop of evilness, but in a sweet envelope.
His sentence came by the time the clock hit 4. 
Jimin was surprised by how fast you arrived at the lab, you were already there when he was just entering by the door and closing it. But, unlike the other times he told you to come here, you were sat on the teacher’s desk, your legs crossed, and the uniform’s skirt spread a little too open for his little too thirsty view. 
“You came early, you can’t last a minute without me, can you?” he teased, taking a seat in front of you. 
“I should be the one saying that, rumors say you were sad during my inability period. Did you miss your little mouse? No one wanted to play with you?” you faked a pout, and the image of you pouting your lips and the words your little mouse coming out of it mixed made him hard. He gave a little snort on his seat incredulous, trying to control his erection and making it seemed like he wasn’t dying to have a piece of you. Again.
“I wasn’t sad. I was bored, making your life miserable was quite funny” he tried to replicate his usual sarcastic voice, but your mellow voice and the mocking shine on your lips made him nervous. You were never like this with him. 
“Whatever, why are you being so attentive with me? I didn't knew you were an expert on lipstick's tone” you rolled your eyes, quite enjoying the sight of him swallowing hard and starting to sweat. 
"I'm trying to change" he doubted a little before saying that, not wanting to appear weak and vulnerable, but his sight was too affected with the sight of your naughty hand caressing your thigh.
"Why would you change?" your innocent tone was a perfect imitation of his, and you were extremely familiarized with his voice at this point so you replicated it perfectly.
“I-I wanted to ask you out” he said firmly.
“And what makes you think I’m going out with you?” 
“Because I can hurt you.” he tried to sound intimidating like before, but you laughed. Jimin will not touch or hurt you again, first he will have to kneel and lick the tip of your shoes.
“That is not a reason, Jimin, that is a condition” you were starting to enjoyed yourself and the conversation, you were finding out that Jimin was a barely tolerable person when he was being polite “give me a good reason on why I should date you” 
“Because I’m rich” he spitted.
“I don’t care about money, I have money myself I don’t someone else’s cash” you contradicted him “Come one, give me another”
“Because I’m handsome”
“Yes, but not my type, you are a little noisy and I prefer them… quiet” you contradicted him again. 
“Because I’m powerful” he was losing his patience, his three mainstays were being wrecked down with your filthy mouth. 
“You are not powerful, your father is powerful, you are just another rich little boy hiding behind his daddy’s wallet” you laughed, and Jimin stood quickly, kicking the sit out and walking fast to you but you did not flinch. What else could he do? The worst things already happened to you in that damn school, there was no lower point so you will not leave without minimizing him once. 
“Shut up!” he shouted close to your face, and he noticed on your features the victory glow. You were happy because you were touching the right buttons, the ones that turned him to nothing.
“You know something, Jimin?” you cock your head to the side “I was wondering why you call me little mouse, why would you pick such a name for me? And then I got it, it’s because you are always chasing me, haunting me…” you took advantage of the proximity and looked down at his shirt, ad your eyes followed the seat trail down his abs. The white transparent fabric of it revealing his tanned skin underneath. 
“So, if I am the mouse, that makes you the cat. And, isn’t the cat always chasing the mouse because it is starving?” you looked back at him, and his jaw dropped when you looked at him with lust, you placed your right hand on his chest making him close his eyes in suffering “Aren’t you starving, Jimin? Don’t you wanna have a taste?” Your left hand dropped on his bulge and he panted, throwing his head back. 
“You’ve been a bad kitten…” you pulled him closer, grabbing his tie. 
Jimin opened his mouth ready to kiss you but the hand that was on his erection went up to cover his mouth. 
“Oh no, what makes you think you can kiss me? You don’t deserve my kisses” 
Jimin’s eyes were wet, but you didn’t if it was of excitement or desperation. Maybe both. His gaze was stuck on your lips, and his tongue started to lick his own, anticipating and remembering the taste of yours.
“Please.” 
“No.” you were turning your back from him, ready to leave him hot and suffering, 
but Jimin grabbed your wrist and repeated: “I said please.” 
“And I said no.” you tried to get off him, but his hand was strong on yours. 
Jimin couldn’t believe you had him by his balls. He almost believed you went you started to act all lustful and started to offer yourself to him, but two people could play this game and he wouldn’t let you leave that room without all his fantasies coming true.
“You are not going anywhere when I’m hard as fuck, you started this you will finish it” 
“Go with Meeyon, Jimin” you laughed bitterly on his face “Close your eyes and think of me” 
“So you know? How much I want you?” he started to kiss your neck aggressively and you melted when his hands touched your thighs devotedly, up and down. He couldn’t believe you knew about his desire for you and you let him suffer alone, for months. 
“You're not exactly discreet” you breathed heavily when he laid you down on the desk and started to unbutton your shirt, his finger rushing and running wobbly over the fabric. When he took the slacks off you and your tummy and breast appeared in front of you he moaned, your red lace bra and your smooth stomach skin being too much for him.
"Oh my god, ___" he moaned and leaned towards you, passing his face over your breasts and your abdomen with devotion, leaving wet kisses and quick licks here and there, rewarding himself with the salty taste of your skin.
"If you're gonna do it, do it right" you exhaled, your raspy voice commanding him beyond the excitement "Be a good kitten and take my clothes off, but first lock the door so no one can interrupt us"
Jimin followed your orders, running to the lab's door and closing it in seconds and coming back to you because he felt you could regret it and leave him turned on and alone.
He came back, knelt in front of your belly and with his fast hands took off the bra and started to kiss you again, sucking your nipples without breaking eye contact because watching you with your open legs, unbuttoned shirt and head back moaning and was the most mesmerizing thing he has ever watched.
"Uhg, Jimin-" you whispered, feeling yourself and the burning pleasure in your chest.
He he took advantage of the fact that you were so paralyzed by the pleasure in your breasts and began to slide down your red socks that reached your knees. He painfully separated his mouth off your tits and kissed each knee, his tongue and lips caressing your shins thirsty.
He felt himself burned, and he realized his clothes were intact. He undo his tie and took his uniform sweater, then his shirt and he was so concentrated on taking his clothes off fast that he didn't realize you had put your skirt up your panties to the side and your fingers were moving up and down your folds.
"___, wait for me honey" he begged taking down his pants and throwing his shirt to the floor.
"Meu gatinho está ansioso, uh?" your voice hot and raspy as cognac hit him like a truck after listen to you in your native language, the sensuality ablazing his ears "Muito gato"
"Yes! "he agreed to whatever you were saying, closing his eyes to enjoy the sound of it "Whatever you want, little mouse"
You slide down your panties, your skirt rolled up and tangled around your wait and the uniform shirt opened ready and aroused for him. Jimin had his pants on his ankles and shirt open as well, but he decided to cover your naked body with his, placing both of you in front the desk but his booty was the only one you could see if someone happen to watch through the door's window.
"Compensate me, Jimin" you said, extending your back down the desk and opening your legs without a glance of modesty for having your body so exposed.
"Yes, sweetheart, I'm gonna make it up to you" he leaned down his mouth getting closer to the cusp in between your legs, "I'm gonna make you feel so good" he sucked your clit and scattered small kisses, making you twist above the table.
"From this day to forever I'm gonna worship you" he licked the juices of your excitement that spilled down your inner thighs "Oh, shit ___, you taste like fucking strawberries" he should have known you would taste like the fucking red color at its sweetest version.
"Fuck me, Jimin, I want to come with you inside me, come on kitten" you mewl, lost in the lust and the hotness of the moment. Jimin hurried to take a condom out of his wallet and put it on himself, so fast he didn't realize you were laughing at him until he heard you.
"Look at you, so anxious to be inside me, so pathetic and compliant, who would have thought?" Jimin couldn't believe your words, but he was more surprised by how erotic he found the perspective of you being mean to him "Did the mouse get your tongue?" you asked again mocking at his picked name for you and how inaccurate it was from the reality in that moment "Hurry or I'm gonna leave"
"S-sorry" he hurried to his task of putting the condom on. He brought you closer to him on the desk and lifted your legs around his waist, accommodating his cock in your entrance. You both moaned in each other mouths when the tip of his dick touched your swollen clit.
He entered slow but steady, increasing the movements of his hips and burying his head in your neck.
"You're such a loser, Jimin" you whispered on his ear "This could have happened months ago if you weren't such an asshole" you tortured him, being intuitive of his kinks "All that money, that arrogance and that face of yours and for what? paired with that lame personality of course you would be scared of girls"
"I'm just scared of you" he confessed.
"Meu gatinho estava com medo de falar comigo?" you pouted your lips, faking comfort "My kitten was scared of talking to me?" you repeated so he could understand. He nodded concentrated in the rhythm of his ramming.
"Why so scared, kitten?"
"Because you're beautiful." he answered ashamed, as if it was obvious yet he tried to deny it for everybody. You knew you shouldn't care if he thought you were attractive, if you were his type or not, he has been hurting your self-esteem for months, but you couldn't contain your pleased expression when he called you beautiful.
"How beautiful?" you asked.
"Like a princess, a fucking princess of sex and cherries, you're so stunning I couldn't believe your body was real, it's god-gifted"
"Jimin!" You screamed, feeling your walls contract together closer, his cock feeling your insides squeezing against him.
"I'm so close"
"I'm close too, princess" he followed you, his erratic hip thrusts making the desk move underneath your ass, the screeches of metal against the floor being louder of what you expected; suddenly coming and finish was a necessity, you needed to get the heck out of that classroom before someone came to get you in trouble.
"I should have take you to my house, I bought red sheets just because they reminded me of you"
"You should buy a red taxi then for when leave to the airport, I'm going home soon" your sarcastic voice was something he was starting to adore.
"You're not going anywhere, and if you go I will follow you"
"You wouldn't last a day in my school" you moaned louder and higher, repeating his name while you felt yourself finishing. He followed you, your moans, his name in your lips, your sweat and the sensation of your pussy around him was too much for him to last two more seconds.
He kissed your neck devotedly, the valley of your breast and your jaw. Devotion and tenderness along side with sweet words of promises and accomplished dreams.
Little did he knew that below the water, you were ready to leave his country and his school that night. You had advanced the paperwork with the exchange office and requested your return before the scheduled date, you bought your airplane ticket and packed your apartment.
You just asked him to join you here because you wanted to give him a small taste of something he could never have again. He drove you home that day, and when he got out of the car he took a little gift box from his backpack.
"This is for you" he gave you the box, in front of your building's door "It's uhm- it's a ring that I had made for you" It was a white gold ring that had a heart shaped ruby stone embedded to it, it also had your name engraved on it. He took your delicate hand with his and put the ring in your middle finger, kissing your knuckles. You tried to ignore how tender and loving that kiss felt.
"I'll see you tomorrow" he said innocently, so unaware of your departure.
"I'll see you then" you smiled happily, kissing his cheek.
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✔︎ TAGLIST: @tae-v-eat @whipwhoops @bunnyca @itachiswaify @sheylamc @samuelfortniteking @rkivewritersblog @mred435 @kthyg @jiminiemochisexybabe @johanseongs @frieschan @sassyfoxunknown @leticiaesteveslp @darkuni63 @minshookie29 @4ukiyo4 @lovelyjmpark @hufflepuffwriter1995 @chimmy-licious @atharu100doceteme @popimagines @distinguisheddestiny @epihowl @enhypens-hoe (Sorry if I forgot anybody, hope this reach to you! 😭)
✔︎ thvlouvre's p.s. I know this is VERY open ended, but I was indecisive about having a part 3, or a small drabble to close their story, but it's up to you, tell me in the comments! As always, I will remain everyone that english is not my native language so please be kind with your feedback and stream Park Jimin 💋
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kimvante2013 · 2 months
Text
𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞 ---┃𝐁𝐓𝐒 -𝐌𝐚𝐤𝐧𝐚𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐞┃
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Pairing: Maknae BTS x f!Reader
Genre: Smut,fluff,marriage life au,family au
Warning: None/just a little smut, the members of the maknae line are in their thirties, a lot of honey, and softness, they are already parents, they just want to spend time with the love of their life,English is not my first language so I apologize if there is a mistake.
A/n: Hi, I hope you are having a great night, after being on this platform for so long I have decided to write my works here, I hope you like my work a lot and I would greatly appreciate the support, I am new to this (lol), the orders are not yet in Open and I hope in the future you will give me ideas or make requests that I will do with pleasure and effort so that you can enjoy them, well that's all, good night and sleep well!
-Gigi
°•⁀➷°•⁀➷°•⁀➷°•⁀➷°•⁀°•⁀➷°•⁀➷°•⁀➷°•⁀➷°•⁀➷°•⁀➷
𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐉𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐧
"Behave well, don't give your grandparents any problems," Park Jimin warns as he finishes fastening the belts of his princesses.
He leaves a delicate kiss on the forehead of each of his girls, they laugh at the same time and with a mischievous tone they chant at the same time - We will be good girls.
Jimin narrows his eyes as if to tell them "you better", then closes the door car and addresses his parents.
-Be careful, contact us as soon as you arrive in Busan- He tells them and gives them a warm smile.
He pats the hood as the car is about to leave, then everyone in the car shakes their hands at him.
Jimin lets out a heavy sigh as he walks towards the house with his hands kept in his back pockets, he feels a certain feeling of emptiness when his girls are not there and you are still at the publishing house.
Then a smile full of malice appeared on his expressionless face. Should I surprise you with a romantic evening? Make you dinner and decorate the place a little so you know how far things flow. He didn't wait after that idea crossed his mind, everything would be ready when you arrived.
Four hours later everything was ready, Jimin had his chest puffed out with pride when he saw all the work he had done alone and even with himself. You knew how crazy you were that he wore a pair of jeans and a long-sleeved black shirt with the top buttons undone, you were definitely going to be surprised.
You arrived home at the same time as always, you frowned when you noticed that all the lights in the house were off then the thought that Maybe Jimin had left due to some issue at his company, it saddened you greatly.
What would you do without the girls and Jimin at home? But to your surprise, as soon as you opened the door, a path of candles and petals settled in front of you, you followed it with a smile on your face and then you couldn't be more confused to see that that path took you directly to the bathroom.
Upon entering through the open door of this one you noticed the tub full of foam that also had petals inside it and next to it was him, that hypnotizing man next to the tub with one hand inside it.
-The bathroom is ready-He warns, looking up at you, he has a radiant and sweet smile that infects you instantly.
And barely finding your voice, you ask in a whisper: -What is all this? Jimin approaches you and runs his hands around your waist to help you take off the coat you are wearing.
-This, my love, is simply a detail, a simple one but one that you well deserve. -He brushes your hair to one side and kisses the back of your neck.
-We will start here, and then we will eat a dinner that I prepared myself.
Do you prefer that I come into the bath with me or do I help you clean yourself? You let out a loud sigh, letting yourself be undressed by him, letting yourself be kissed by him and it was more than perfect.
-I prefer that you come in next to me-You turn to face him, their faces are so close that not a second passes before they are kissing each other desperately.
It's been so long since you've been missing those kinds of spaces together, you loved when Park Jimin had those details with you.
-And tell me, do you prefer that I just keep you company or will you let me make love to you in that bathtub?
You let out a moan against his lips as you feel his hands on your waist,you are so hot that his wet hands cause a slight tingle. Right now,any place Jimin decides to touch will make you delirious with anticipation, it's more than obvious what you want.
"And how are you going to make love to me?" You ask, trying to play along.
The shirtless guy and you completely naked, but without anything relevant yet,they still have a whole weekend.
There is no reason to rush things.
-Slow, I will take my time to feel you completely, love, all night- He kisses you again, and you press him closer to you.
"All night long," you say, repeating that promise on his lips.
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𝐊𝐢𝐦 𝐓𝐚𝐞𝐡𝐲𝐮𝐧𝐠
It had been a very exhaustive trip for Kim Taehyung, he had left very early for Daegu to be able to share a good time with his parents and thus leave his three monsters in the countryside in the company of their grandparents,he anxiously hoped that his little ones would enjoy that trip so much place like he used to do in his childhood.
He took the road when night was already falling, it had been an exciting day and he was grateful that his children were as carefree as him,since for your part the fact that the mud could ruin your shoes, that the mosquitoes could become very attached to you or Among many other things, it made you refuse any plan that included the field and you in the same word.
And that was the reason why Taehyung was so upset with you, since you had taken your body out completely when you found out about the plans he had for that day, and how could you not be if it had been a complete disrespect not only to your in-laws but also to Taehyung's origins?
Were you sorry? Yes, of course you were, that kept going through your head even though your intentions had been not to ruin their day with your complaints or your long faces, but you could feel the rejection that you had provoked in your loved one. Anyway, you were too anxious to know that he would return that same night, you thought that maybe he would stay at his parents' house because of what happened, but you knew very well that Taehyung ne was capable of leaving you without any company.
When you heard the door lock on the ground floor of his home you swore you could feel your heart bursting out of your chest.
You tried various poses as you listened to his footsteps approach the room, in the end you ended up with one hand supporting your head and your other arm resting on your hip while your body was turned towards the door. You were wearing a pretty white lingerie that you hoped would help calm your husband's bad temper.
As soon as the door was opened, you noticed Taehyung's slender and tall figure illuminated by the moonlight that filtered through the blinds, but you couldn't decipher what expression his face had at that moment.
What if you were rejected? Surely your pride couldn't handle it. You bit your lips impatient for his silence. The non-annoyed Tae would have already said some horny comment or lunged at you, but he remained under the doorway without intending to make any movement.
-Do you think that this way you will solve things? -It makes you shudder to hear that voice so hoarse and cold. You are a little disconcerted, so you abandon the pose you had and decide to sit on the edge of the bed with your gaze fixed on the floor. -Seriously, it was not my intention to make you feel that your origins bother me and that I don't like your parents. "Jeez Taehyung, I would love you the same if you were the sexy farmer from Daegu and not a famous singer!" You exclaim a little upset, just a little, you hate when everything goes wrong between the two of you.
Then you look up and see him in front of you: -Would you be mine regardless? What? And if I tell you now that I would like to move to Daegu, would we
We will separate and you will never wear outfits that are so hot for me again? You let out a small laugh, he is so sincere and spontaneous.
-I may not be a big fan of the countryside, but if you are happy and the children are happy there, it will be more than enough for me-You answer honestly.
Then you get out of bed and whisper against his lips: - Regarding the hot outfits, I will wear them as long as you are willing to take them off.
Taehyung seals his lips against yours in a hungry kiss, you have to cling to him when you feel your legs tremble and then he decides to give you a slight push so that you fall on the bed, positioning himself over you. -I would never get tired of having to take them off, beautiful. It's my favorite part.
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𝐉𝐞𝐨𝐧 𝐉𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐤𝐨𝐨𝐤
His routine that Sunday had been quite simple. After leaving Minho with your mother, you and Jungkook had gotten to work on your respective studies; nothing out of this world, perhaps tranquility reigned in their home at that moment but they both had to accept that they loved listening to their son's mischievous laugh and participating in some of his occurrences,and they were a little desperate due to the overwhelming silence that reigned in their home. home. Then it was time for dinner, and it was as quiet as their afternoon had been.
Had they fought or something like that? Not exactly, but those days were the ones where the most stress fell on both of them, whether it was because of their jobs or other issues, both of them were very aware that in those times they couldn't annoy each other, so they preferred to keep silence.
Jungkook had gone to bed before you, but what surprised you most was seeing him sleeping in the same clothes, he wasn't usually one of those, he was too clean.
You went to take a bath anyway, came out in his towel and then left it on the side of the bed when you started putting the cream on.
You felt strong hands pull your waist causing you to fall completely on the mattress, then you wet and naked had a dry and clothed Jungkook cornering you.
-I can't keep pretending to be decent-You can't help but leave your confused face aside causing Jungkook to smile against your lips-I've been wanting to make love to you all day and now that I have the chance I won't let it go.
Then you smile a huge smile while you put your arms behind Jungkook's neck and wrap your legs around him: -And what are you waiting for? Show me.
And well after all the house was not going to be so silent anymore, not silent at all.
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𝐓𝐚𝐠 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭 (𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧)
⎙ If anyone wants to be part of the list, you can let me know.
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astayinwonderland · 2 months
Note
Plz can you write a jimin smut fanfic play boy au
"What is it about Park Jimin?" | Park Jimin
pairing: jimin x f.reader (guest appearance jk... but through text)
genre: smut MDNI
requested by: @jimincrystal
wc: 1.6k
summary: you have a problem... your neighbour jimin is too loud, but you are terribly attracted to him
warnings: pet names (jimin calls reader "pretty girl"), mentions of jimin being into girls and boys, fingering, nipple play, unprotected sex (don't pls), cursing... lmk if I forgot anything.
✧˚ ༘ ⋆。♡˚✧˚ ༘ ⋆。♡˚✧˚ ༘ ⋆。♡˚✧˚ ༘ ⋆。♡˚✧˚ ༘ ⋆。♡˚✧˚ ༘ ⋆。♡˚
“Hi,” his full lips curve into the flirtiest of smiles. 
“Oh, hi,” your tiny voice answers. Dammit, what was it about him anyway? 
He leans on the wall as you try not to look nervous. But who are we kidding? When you moved into this flat two months ago, all you could do was think about your next-door neighbour. It was hard not to, he often had “visitors” to entertain him, especially at night. You could hear through the very thin walls how much fun they would have. The exquisite moans he would get from the gorgeous girls and boys who were lucky enough to spend a night with him. 
You, on the other hand, are too embarrassed to look him in the eye. Not after hearing everything that happens on the other side of that wall. Not after reaching for your vibrator multiple times… 
“I think it’s about time I introduced myself,” he extends his hand and for the first time since he started talking, you look up. 
Ashy blonde hair frames his beautiful complexion. Brown eyes, staring right into yours, and his smile so beautiful, so inviting, it made your knees tremble. Before your knees gave in, you shook his hand. 
“I’m Jimin.” 
“Nice to meet you. I’m–” 
“I know, the prettiest girl in the building,” he kisses the back of your hand after whispering your name which makes you hot with wanton. 
Jimin knows perfectly the effect he has on people, but seeing the effect he has on you is different. The way your breath seems now heavier, your lips parted in shock, and oh your smell is so deliciously intoxicating. He can’t wait to have you. 
“See you around, pretty girl,” he walks to his door and you can’t even think straight. 
Nighttime comes and you find yourself eating a bowl of cereal and rewatching your favourite show. All of a sudden, you hear a loud thud on the wall, which immediately breaks your concentration. You pause the show and of course, you already know what it is. 
“Fuck! Just like that! Yes, yes!” you hear the muffled cries on the other side of the wall. When is this going to end? Should you say something? 
You pace back and forth in front of your door, trying to make a decision and in your two seconds of braveness, you gather the courage to walk next door. Your hand is about to knock when the door opens. 
“Oh!” the gorgeous girl exclaims. Beautiful dark skin, hazel eyes, and long legs. “See you around, Jimin.” She walks past you. 
Jimin waves goodbye and his eyes land on you. Flower-pattern pyjamas, fuzzy slippers, messy hair. 
“Is something wrong, pretty?” 
“I– you should try to keep it down…” you try not to look at his bare chest and his tattoo on display. Oh, the way you would lick–
“So you can hear through the wall,” he sounds surprised as if he couldn’t believe his plan worked. 
“Yes, and please… next time I would appreciate it if you, and your visitors, were a little bit less– you know,” 
“What if you are next? Would you keep it down?” 
“Excuse me?” 
He laughs, and you can tell he is enjoying this. 
“Good night, pretty. I love your pyjamas by the way,” he winks at you and closes the door. 
After a couple of days without seeing, or hearing, Jimin, you start to wonder if showing up like that outside his door was too much. You don’t want to overthink, but for you, it is important to have at least a decent relationship with your neighbours. 
It isn’t until after work that day that you come back to your flat and find a note on your door. 
I have no right, but I need a favour. Dinner at 8? I’ll bring everything. Btw, you’re gorgeous. 
Can't wait, 
Jimin x 
Fuck. 
You thought about not welcoming Jimin, after all, he is a stranger. But something about him just made you want to open yourself to him. Yes, you wanted him, so when he knocked on your door, you were already dolled up. You looked effortlessly put together. When Jimin came in and took a look at you, he scanned you up and down. 
“I knew it, the prettiest girl in the building… prettiest girl in the world,” he brought food and wine for both of you. It smelled really good and tasted even better. 
“So what is this about?” 
“First of all, thank you. My friend is visiting, so we’ve been going around the city these last few days– and now he met this girl… and you know, he wanted to invite her over before he leaves,” he laughs, sipping his wine. 
“Oh… I see,” you look down, trying to mask the awkwardness. 
“Also, I wanted to apologise for the— noise.” 
“It’s okay, apology accepted,” you smile. Jimin is way more friendly than you thought. He is easy to talk to, funny, and interesting. You can see why he has so many people fall for his charms. 
And then you both hear it– moaning so loud you could think there was some adult movie being filmed next door. It was intense, the skin slapping, muffled but clear enough to know what it was. 
Jimin turns to look at you, and he can’t help but laugh. 
“Oh pretty girl, this is what you were talking about–” 
“Oh no, this is worse,” you cover your ears but end up laughing at Jimin’s expression. 
“What, do you think they could hear us from this side?” 
Your eyes widen and you’re not sure if you’re imagining it, but now that the wine is in your system, you want Jimin even more. 
“I think so,” once again your tiny voice comes out. 
“Let me kiss you,” Jimin leans in and waits, so you pull him in. 
His lips are soft as you expect them to be, but his tongue is the root of all sin. It tastes so good against yours, teasing and sucking your bottom lip. He is hooked on the way you kiss him back, creating a dependence on the little moans you give him, enjoying every little second of such a passionate kiss. Your hands go to the back of his neck, lips locking with each other again and again, causing your arousal to start pooling between your legs. Fuck, what is it about Park Jimin? 
The moans can still be heard next door, but you don’t mind anymore as pieces of clothing are forgotten on the floor. 
“Shit– you’re fucking gorgeous, look at these tits,” he sucks and kisses your nipples, worshipping them as his fingers gather your arousal. 
His tongue circles your hard nipple as one of his fingers slides into you. You let out a long, pleading moan. You wanted this, for so fucking long you wanted him. The way your back is arched gives him better access to you. So now you are under his control, he fucked you with his finger as his precum leaked off his cock. What a fucking sight. 
Another finger goes in, and in your desperate state to cum, you reach to your clit and start playing with it just like you like it. 
“Is that how you played with yourself while eavesdropping on what was going on next door, pretty?” he asks, but you can’t answer. You are too lost in this raw, filterless feeling of sheer pleasure. 
Jimin slides his fingers out of you, making you cry in disbelief, you were so close. 
“I wanna have you right there, against the wall.” 
So with your hands against the wall and your back bent forward, he holds to your hips and aligns with your entrance. His cock thick and veiny enters you with ease. His hips snap into yours, and he pulls your head up by your hair. 
“Tell me pretty, how good does it feel?” 
“So–so… aaahhh, so good,” you cry, you moan. His cock is deep inside you, hitting just the right spot. It’s better than good. He has devil cock and you are sure gonna sin again and again for it. 
“You have no idea how many times I dreamt of having you like this… Every fucking time I wondered if you could hear me from here… your pussy is fucking perfect.” 
And it was in the way your warm walls hugged his cock so tightly he hoped you would beg for more after this. Jimin’s head begins to feel lighter and lighter and he can’t believe he is already about to cum. But how can he not if you are the fucking best. 
You can’t even hear how loud you’re being, all you are focused on is how deliciously Jimin stretches you out like you are meant to be fucked by him, only him. 
“Pretty girl, I am not gonna last long, you– you feel– you’re the best…” 
“Cum with me, please, please, I am so close,” and your words float in the air as Jimin fucks you just as you wanted until you are both cuming and crashing into such an intense orgasm, you see white and have to be held by him. His warm cum dripping down your legs, the sinful evidence of such a dirty but pleasurable deed. 
The moans next door have completely stopped and Jimin has already helped you to get you cleaned up. You both lie naked on your couch, his arm around you and you wonder how the fuck are you going to casually say hi to him again in the hallway. 
Jimin’s phone vibrates.
Jungkook: Shit, man. Couldn’t you let me have one night? One fucking night? 
Jimin: You were being too loud, and this girl’s is out of this world. 
You look at Jimin, exhausted, your eyes closing. 
“Should we make this a regular thing?” he asks. 
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a/n: this took me so so sooo long-- sorry... I had the biggest writer's block with this one. Jimin makes me nervous.
also... this is pure ✨fiction✨ hope you enjoyed it!
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jmvore · 4 months
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mr. lover | wild thought(s) drabble [r1]
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↳ SYNOPSIS › a little peace and quiet with your baby boy. » warning(s) › feeding Jimin strawberries, jimin getting horny from rubs, & Jimin falling asleep on you (nothing severe), touching genitals? idk what to call it but jimin humps you lol, loads of kissing (because who wouldn't want to kiss Jimin?), biting, a little foodplay. » pairing(s) › jimin x reader » word(s) › 800+ (it's a small one) » song playing › say yes by floetry » note(s) › so, this was supposed to be apart of a request but i couldn't figure out where to put it so i decided to make it, it's own drabble. it's barely edited sooo if it doesn't make sense, sorry lol. any pamper your baby boy! enjoy and
thank you for reading! & remember: you nice, keep going.❤️
› masterlist ‹
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“Open up sweetheart.”
You gently stroke his chin, watching him close his eyes and open his mouth. The strawberry dipped in melted chocolate is brought to his lips for him to taste.
"Bite, Petal." He does he is told, moaning at the taste before running his tongue over his lips. He grabs your hand after discarding the stem in the trash as he licks the juice and extra chocolate off your fingers. "You're going to start something if you keep this up."
"I hope so." He giggles when you smirk, throwing his arm around your neck to try and unwind. There's a beat of silence. You welcome it, giving him the stress-free atmosphere he needs and playing with his hair. You run your fingers through it to hear him purr like a kitten. He loves it when you gently scratch his scalp. Pamper him like a princess while lovingly kissing his forehead and telling him you love him.
If he's being honest, it's his favorite pass time. Especially when neither of you have much going on and you can simply lay in each others arms.
Jimin yawns, melting deeper into your caressing. From the looks of it, you know he's going to fall asleep soon.
“How do you feel?”
“Better. Relaxed.” He grins, leaning up to press his body on top of yours. Only to cause you to fall backward. He giggles and you can't help but return the sentiment as he nuzzles his face in your neck and plants kisses all over your collarbones. “Thank you.”
“Anything for you, sweetheart." You stop him but he whines in retaliation. You know he's going to regret not going to sleep at his normal time. "Baby, it's almost three am. You need to sleep."
"I don't wanna."
"Jimin-" He cuts you off with a kiss before going back to kissing your jawline. You let the covers slip from your body, pulling closer to give his thigh a squeezes.
“I love you.”
“And I love you, sweetheart. Sleep.” You lean forward and kiss the top of his head as he lets out another giggle but this one actually makes you coo. "Baby..."
"No sleep. I just wanna stay up with you." He says playfully while he snuggles into your chest while throwing his arms around your middle. For a moment, you believe him to be asleep until he rises from the position he’s in and glances at your lips before looking you straight in the eyes and smirking. 
“Kiss me again.” It's not a question nor was it a request.
You smirk once you realize it, placing your finger underneath his chin and pressing your lips against his like he demanded. Of course, that’s not enough. At least, for Jimin. He closes his eyes the moment you thread your fingers through his hair to pull at the tips of it as he moans, mostly sounding like a purr.
“You’re going to start something-”
“Maybe that’s what I want.” Jimin grins against your lips before going back to kissing you. He pushes his tongue into your mouth but quickly loses control as he melts into your arms. He knows it’s doing something to you, the way you’re moaning and rutting against him. He loves the way you're so fucking into him and if this doesn't work out, he doesn't know if he’ll recover from how well you take care of him.
Shit, what if it doesn’t though… He doesn’t want to start over-
“No thinking.” You get him to look at you as you shake your head. You felt it the moment the kiss weakened. “Whatever it is. It’s not important right now.”
Your hands trail down his back to round his ass to get him to grind against your leg before giving it a smack. You squeeze and kneed it for his comfort before moving so he's laying on top of you.
"C'mere." You sound so fucking sexy and it has Jimin whimpering in return. "Look what you've done."
You bring his hand down to you cunt, letting him run his finger through your lips to see how wet you are. His eyes follow before looking up to you and meeting yours.
"You wanna play?" He nods but you shake your head. "Words, Petal."
"I-I wanna p-play with you. Yes."
His other hand goes to grab your breast, leaning down to roll his tongue around your nipple. Though just as quick as he was to start, you stop him by bringing him face to face.
"I wanna touch you."
"Do you?"
He nods, groaning when you nip at his bottom lip to pull it toward you. Rutting against you as his cock slides against your wet pussy. You softly moan the moment his hips fallen into a rhythm, not wanting to stop him because with how hard he is and how wet you are, it feels way too good to stop. Especially when he his cock presses against your clit.
“I’m gonna cum…” He whines as you grip his ass harder to get him to rut faster.
“Good. Cum for me, Petal.”
Jimin grips your shoulders to the point you know it’s probably going to leave a bruise. You don’t care, you’re more concerned with him cumming than anything else.
“Keep going, baby.”
“I’m gonna cum…” He whimpers again, face falling into the crook of your neck as he throws his arms around it. “C-Close…”
“Cum, baby. C’mon.”
“Ah! Ah!” His nails dig into the bed as he hangs his head in pleasure. He shudders through a chill. His hips stuttering the moment he catches his bearings. You reach up to caress the side of his face as he leans into it with a dopey grin. 
“How do you feel now, Petal?"
Jimin collapses onto your chest with a deep sigh. As he lays there, you realize you’re going to have to coax him back from his head space. 
"Baby?”
"’m 'kay…’ Jimin grins, snuggling his face into your neck. “I feel good.”
You hold him by his waist before rubbing up and down his back to get him to calm down. 
"Wanna lay down?’
“Please.”
You maneuver him to the bed, getting him to lay on his front but he shakes his head. Before you can ask what’s wrong, he motions for you to join him.
“It helps.”
You nod, laying on your back, you pull him into your arms as you begin to trace the moons going down his back.
“Feeling better, baby?”
"Y-Yes.” He leans forward to press a soft kiss to your lips as you both smile into it. “Thank you.”
You notice he’s starting to nod off, his head lolling about once you get him to stay still in your arms.
"Sleep?"
“Sleep baby. I’ll be right here, Petal.’
Jimin hums as you place a kiss on his forehead and you can’t help but admire your baby. Hugging him tighter, not wanting to let go.
”I love you,” You whisper, knowing it’s most likely the last thing he heard as he begins to drift off into dreamland.
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©2023 » JMVORE || @/googikoo and @/http-pjm » All Rights Reserved.  DO NOT Copy, Translate, Re-Upload, or Steal ANY of my work. Thank You!
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196 notes · View notes
peachypinkygloss · 7 months
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fanatic love — pjm
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When Jimin knew about your crush on him, you didn't expect him to invite you to his apartment and to get rid of your clothes once there, but you surely don't mind at all.
ꨄ︎ pairing: popular!jimin x inexperienced/fem!reader
ꨄ︎ genre: college au, friends to lovers, smut
ꨄ︎ word count: 4k
ꨄ︎ warnings: she's DOWN BAD, but jimin likes how in love she is with him, dom jimin/sub reader, praising & degradation, a bit of dumbification, unprotected sex, masturbation (f & m), brief anal play, lots of cum (as always), overstimulation, multiple orgasms.
a.n.: you ask and you shall receive 🫶🏻 call me!jk's next on the list :)
When Jimin discovered you had a big fat crush on him, it's not what you thought would happen.
You're not good at keeping secrets, even your own, so your friends knew all about your silly crush on Park Jimin — the godly handsome popular boy from your college.
You've never really talked to him, but it doesn't take you a lot to fall in love. To be frank, the only thing you share with him is a friend group and even then you've never had the chance to exchange more than three words with him.
Well, all of this has changed now. Never in a million years you'd have thought you'd step foot into his apartment, not even his bedroom, and surely not to have that type of conversation with him — if you can call it a conversation anyway.
But here you are, backing away as he steps forward, looking intensely into your eyes. He has such a serious expression on his face and you don't understand why he does, the only thing you know is that it's making your panties wet. Really wet.
"You'd do everything I ask, right?" His voice is soft, but also stern, making you swallow as stress rises up in your body; heart beating faster, hands slightly trembling, sweat forming on your forehead.
His simple presence makes you anxious, wishing you'll do nothing stupid that could make him lose interest in you. Don't disappoint him.
"Yes," you murmur, your stare fixated on him and your back eventually hitting the wall behind you. You don't want to run away from him — never would you — but you're not used to all of this.
Anything he asks, you'll do. Whatever it is; a crush, love, obsession, it doesn't matter because all you want to do is please him, to be the one who'll make his day better, to be the one he'll think about just before going to sleep.
He already does those things for you, so why not do them for him, too.
"Good girl," he praises and your face immediately heats up. Hearing that from him makes you happy and you want to continue being good for him.
Up close to him like that you can see how beautiful he truly is, reminding you just how much you love him, how hard your heart beats for him.
His dark brown eyes are disconcertingly soft and his lips are round, big — looking so pillowy, so inviting. You don't feel indifferent under his gaze, that's what you like the most about it; how unique you are when he looks at you because you have to be if you catch Park Jimin's attention.
It's so hard to be that close to him and not having the permission to touch him. You'd love to feel the smoothness of his skin or have your fingers run through his thick, shiny blond hair. You like the contrast between his dark eyebrows and the bleached colour of his hair, it makes them stand out more.
"Come here, sweet thing," he tells you in a raspy voice, his tone low and making you shiver in desire. You take one step and your breaths are already mingling together, your head tilted up to look at him. "Let's get those clothes off, hm? Isn't that a good idea?"
You eagerly nod your head at him, sinking your teeth into your bottom lip as his hands come to grip your white blouse. He expertly pops out the buttons one by one, your eyes following his movements closely, his touch making you feel hotter and hotter.
His fingers are adorned in many chunky silver rings, his nails are cut short and a small tattoo is hiding on the side of his index finger of his left hand. Veins are apparent on his hands going all down to his forearms, making them look so sinful and strong — the epitome of lust itself.
He opens the button that shows your breasts supported by your bra, the contact of his skin against yours making your heart skip a beat. "Your hands are so cold," you whisper to him, shyly glancing up at his face.
He doesn't look back at you, his attention being fully on unbuttoning the piece of clothing, but he answers two simple words; "I know."
Your eyes go back down to his fingers, seeing that he only has one button left and he doesn't hesitate to pop it out. He slides the material off your shoulders, throwing it away on the floor of his bedroom.
You're left in your skirt, and even though you feel very vulnerable right now with your chest out, you're impatient for him to discover the lower half of your body, too. So far, you aren't disappointing him, which feels good.
He unzips your skirt and tugs it down, falling down at your feet. You shrug it away, Jimin admiring your half nude body with his beautiful almond-eyes.
"Look at how pretty you are," he compliments. "And all for me."
You sheepishly smile when hearing these words, turned on he's addressing you as his, as if everything you do and think is about him. And he'd be right about that.
His hands hovers just over your hips, his fingertips tracing the shape of your curves, going up and down so slowly, making goosebumps appear on your skin.
Your chest heaves rapidly and the temperature of the room starts to get higher, leaving you breathless and flustered. This moment is very intimate and him being able to see what kind of underwear you wear is so, so personal.
Underclothes are like a secret you only reveal to the people you trust the most and this status doesn't go to anyone, it applies to a very selective handful of people. And in some cases, to only one person.
Jimin being this person is just unbelievable, and there's nobody else you'd let see you like that. Nobody, only him.
His hands sneak behind you to reach the clip of your bra and he swiftly unhooks it. Your eyes are on him, scared to look away for a second, as the garment falls on the ground. Your nipples harden from the cold air hitting them, Jimin's stare on them.
He licks his lips and gently cups your breasts, cutting your breath short. "How cute are they, mh?" He asks in a honeyed voice, melting your heart, taking your sanity away bit by bit.
He pinches your buds between his fingers, making them even harder, slowly circling them. You softly whine, feeling your stomach twist from the sensations he procures to you by playing with your nipples. They point at him, perky and erected, and he smirks, enjoying how they seem to really like him.
His hands descend along your stomach, your muscles twitching under his cold fingertips, teasing the band of your panties. It's when his eyes shift up to your face, maybe asking for permission or just to check up on you, that your heart jumps in your chest.
He passes his digit over the bow sewn on your underwear then teasingly going under the material, threatening to remove it. "Do you mind?" His question comes out low and breathy, his hands starting to get impatient.
"No..." You're quick to respond, shaking your head from side to side. It's all he needs before he tugs on your panties, sliding them down your legs.
You're now completely bared in front of him, his lustful eyes roaming over your body, making you feel really small under his gaze. His hand comes really close to your heat, but he only brushes his fingers against your pussy, tricking you into thinking he's going to touch you down there.
"Sweet girl, go sit on the bed for me, m'kay?" he softly demands, laying his palm on your naked hip. "Can you do that?"
You nod your head and he steps aside to let you walk to his bed placed in the corner of his room. He watches you crawl to one end of the mattress, turning around to sit on your butt.
It's not long until he joins you, a little grin gracing his plump pink lips. As he walks up to you, he gets rid of his t-shirt, revealing to you his 'nevermind' tattoo drawn on his rib cage that you'd only ever heard rumours about. Now you know it really exists and you find it absolutely stunning on him, making him look much sexier.
He removes his jeans too, but you're taken aback when he drags his boxers with them as well. His cock springs free and you can't ignore the heat you feel between your legs — it's burning.
You can't help but stare at it with rounded eyes. He's fully erected and just the fact that you're the cause of it, makes you so aroused. He's average, but girthy and curved and really ... agitated.
It twitches before you and you look at it with so much admiration — his cock is so pretty, you didn't think you'd have been so turned on by just seeing one.
But it's Jimin after all. Everything about him is perfect, pretty and hot.
He takes the other end of the bed, leaning his back against the wall. You start moving to come to him, but he stops you. "No, you stay right there, sweetheart."
"Why?" You pout, offended. You want to touch him, that's literally the only thing you want, you think. How can you not when his erection looks so hard and painful, leaking so much pre-cum just inches away from you?
"'Cause I'm gonna watch you," he explains softly, wrapping his palm around his pulsating cock. "And you're gonna watch me, sweet girl."
Oh.
He passes his left hand through his hair, getting the blond strands away from his almond shaped eyes, a watch crowning his wrist. Jimin really loves jewelry and you love it on him.
He gets comfortable, parting his legs a bit wider. You swear you have the most sinful scenery happening in front of your eyes and god, it makes your clit throb so hard.
"Don't be shy, baby," he smiles, eyes glinting, playful or maybe mischievous... "Show me your little pussy," he says and you can't deny him.
So you open your legs a bit hesitant, but you still do it. You lean against the other wall, keeping your knees bent and positioning two fingers beside your drenched cunt.
Jimin grins at the sight, lips parted as his eyes are strained down on your pussy, so much arousal leaking from it. "You're literally soaking wet. Didn't know you loved me that much," he teases and your face heats up again from embarrassment. He was never supposed to find out, but you surely won't complain right now.
"I've just... wanted this for so long," you confess in a quiet voice, slowly rubbing your pussy lips to get in the mood, carefully avoiding your clit.
He squeezes his cock, his eyes closely following your fingers, biting down on his plump bottom lip. "You should've told me, this would've happened much sooner..." He whispers back, making you fantasize about everything that could have happened if only you had the courage.
You run your hand over your tummy going up to your chest, brushing over your hard nipples. You love the small friction it creates, still a bit too shy to do more than roll the sensitive buds under your palm.
Jimin loves it, too. He grips his cock, tugging at it slightly, mimicking the same pace as you; slow and steady.
You whimper when you place a digit on your throbbing clit, beginning to draw tight circles on it. He looks at your pussy intently, his breath quickening each time your legs tremble from the pleasure or when you open your legs wider, desperate to feel more than just your small fingers.
When he stares at you, it's like he wants to get something from you — probably sexual, naively hoping it's more — and his gaze makes you shudder, ready to kneel before him, to give him everything he needs.
Oh, you definitely feel like the luckiest girl in the world right now. He chose you, not some other girl, you. You have to be special.
He fucks his fist as you toy with your bud of nerves, head rolling back and hitting the wall behind, hooded eyes focused on his hand running up and down his hard cock. You moan sweetly and he grunts at the melodic sounds, tightening his grip around his length.
He looks so good and it literally turns you crazy how far he is from you, and yet, you're both masturbating on the same bed. You grope one of your tit, palming it and kneading it in your hand, pussy clenching at the sight of Jimin stroking his wet cock.
"Please, Jimin," you whine desperately, clearly showing how needy and eager you are for him. "Let me touch you, or whatever you want, but please-"
He frowns, shaking his head, cutting you off. "No, you heard me, sweet thing," he begins, voice breathy. "Be a good girl and keep playing with your little pussy, mh?" He asks and his answer doesn't please you, but you have to behave.
You sigh, but you nod your head in agreement nonetheless. It's such a shame, you know for a fact that his cock would slip right away in your hole at how wet it is for him. He would stretch you out so well, you just want to feel him against your walls. Is it too much to ask?
So you do what you're told to, rubbing your clit in quick circles and pulling on your nipples, stimulating them with your palm. You arch your back and moan obscenely, bringing yourself close to the edge.
"Yeah, sweetheart. That's it, fuck," he groans, throwing his head back. His lips are parted, letting out heavy breaths and deep moans as he watches you pleasuring yourself. "Good girl, such a good girl for me," he praises, the words coming out a bit mindlessly, drunk on the way you rub your clit avidly and how your wetness drips down to your ass, skin glistening under the light of his bedroom.
He tugs on his cock, the skin of his penis moving up and down as he fucks his hand. You feel it building up at the pit of your stomach too quickly, and you suddenly stop, not wanting to cum too soon.
As you stop, you grope your boobs again instead, waiting a little before starting back up with your swollen clit. Jimin hisses, halting his movement, too, covering the slit of his tip with his thumb.
"Are you edging yourself, baby?" He chuckles, rubbing his digit over his slit, spreading his pre-cum around his dark pink head.
"Mh-hm," you nod your head, passing your fingers over your pussy lips. "Wanna cum with you," you say in a pouty voice, letting out a quiet whimper as you pinch on your sensitive nipples.
"Aw, what a cute girl," he coos, a smirk forming on his lips. "You will, now just keep going, okay?" He instructs and you execute yourself, resuming the tight circles you were drawing on your clit.
"Okay," you breathe out.
Yes, you want to orgasm at the same time as him, but you also don't want this to end. It's like one of your wet dreams came to life and you want it to last as long as possible, enjoy every second of it.
You could edge yourself for hours, you don't care. You could stop every time you feel it coming, moving your fingers away from your puffy clit, feeling it pulsating so hard like you actually have a heartbeat there.
But every dream must come to an end. You have to eventually wake up from it, even though you wish you would never.
Jimin gets his hair away from his face again, little strands sticking to his forehead. His chest and shoulders are coated in a thin layer of sweat, like you know your back is as well. Damp and hot, that's how your skin feels like.
You dip two fingers in your pussy slightly just to bring some of your arousal up to your clit, making the circles smoother and kind of sticky.
He wets his dried lips with his pink tongue, grunting as he accelerates the pace of his palm around his engorged cock. He drags the loose skin of his dick up and down with every thrust, the muscles of his abs flexing as he controls himself, following attentively your fingers moving in circles over your poor, swollen clit.
"Ah, Jimin," you moan out, knitting your eyebrows together while you work hard on your bud, bringing yourself back over the edge. You're so desperate at this point, you just want to see him ejaculate and make a mess on himself, knowing it's all because of you.
"Come on, sweetheart. You've been so good," he tells you with his low, raspy voice, always honeyed and pleasant to the ear. "Cum with me," he insists and you want it so bad.
"Yes, please, please," you beg, as if he hadn't already given you the permission to, but it comes out instinctively. "Oh, my god-!" You cry out, rubbing fast circles on your clit until your body jerks forward, hips bucking against your hand.
Jimin grits his teeth, sucking air through them as he gives quick, short strokes to his thick cock. Seeing you cumming in front of his eyes riles him up, toes curling as he breathes heavily, plushy lips parted.
"Yes, yes," you sigh, toying with your clit to ride out your high, eyes fixated on Jimin's hand going up and down his length really fast.
"Aah, fuck," he curses under his breath, the knot at the pit of his stomach finally ripping off. His cock jerks in his hand, spurting out long, thick ropes of white cum, landing on his tummy.
His hand slows down, doing long and steady strokes to get everything out. He squeezes his grip and little white beads spill out from his sticky tip, dribbling down over Jimin's hand.
You swallow as you watch the whole scene, his cum slowly dripping down over his abs, falling onto his dark pubic hair. You tell yourself that this isn't enough, that you want — need more. More sex, more of Jimin.
You then totally act on your impulses, getting up on your knees and straddling Jimin's lap. He keeps his mouth agape, eyebrows frowned as he looks at you gripping his cock and aligning it with your entrance.
His hands hover over your hips, clenching into fists when you sink down on him. "Shit," he chokes on his word, watching his cock covered in his cum disappearing into your wet pussy. "Fuck, sweet thing, don't- oh, god."
The overstimulation is painful, but you both love it.
He lifts up his head and your eyes connect, your arms wrapped around his strong shoulders. His pupils are dilated and he looks so good like this; sweaty, breathless and out of his mind.
You immediately start jumping on his cock, honestly not really knowing what you're doing, but it feels incredible, so you continue. Jimin lets you use him, his head rolling back, holding onto your hips.
His fingers have heated up, now warm, only the silver of his rings being cold against your burning skin. You bounce on his dick with so much energy you even surprise yourself, but Jimin's whiny moans encourage you to keep going, wanting to feel his hot cum deep into you badly.
"Jumping on my cock like a little slut..." He groans, guiding your hips on his lap, doing fast grind motions. "You're no sweet girl," he says, one hand running down to the small of your back, sneaking down to your ass. "You're a fucking whore," Jimin rasps out, dipping the tip of his middle finger in your tight hole.
You gasp, but keep riding him like your life depends on it. You just want to cum around him, though, and you'll do it because damn it, you deserve it. Jimin might be right; you must be a slut, but god, does it feel good to be one. Especially when Jimin's your client — hypothetically.
"Only... only for you," you manage to respond, mouth open to let out your lewd moans. He keeps teasing your ass, slightly stretching it out with his thumb now. You're ashamed to admit it, but feeling him filling up your other hole turns you totally hysteric.
"Hm? What did you say, baby?" Jimin wonders, looking at you with hooded eyes, lust dancing in them.
"I'm a slut," you reply in a whiny voice. "But only for you," you state and it makes Jimin chuckles, a lopsided smile plastered on his face. You're so down bad for him, he likes it — feeds off of it.
"That's right," he approves, collecting some of your arousal on his digit. "Only for me, sweetheart. Just for me," he repeats while circling your rim with the pad of his finger covered in your wetness.
You moan in response, hiding your face in the crook of his neck. He then smacks your ass, groping the bouncing flesh after, his cool rings brushing against your skin.
You grind on him, your hips going so fast Jimin has difficulty following up, your tits squished against his sweaty chest. His cock feels so good against your walls, your pussy clenching around him several times as you can't keep in your moans.
"I love it," you admit, not knowing how to keep your tongue in your mouth as your brain is all mushy right now. "Love your big cock, Jimin," you say drunkly, your mouth beside his ear.
"Yeah? Like my cock in your tight little pussy?" He asks, pulling you away from his neck, making you face him by having a grip on your hair.
"Yes, love it so much," you cry, sinking your nails into the skin of his back, leaving small crescent forms.
"Then I'mma fucking give it to you, baby."
You moan out loudly when Jimin thrusts up into you, his feet sinked into the mattress as he fucks you hard and deep. Your ass bounces as he snaps his hips against yours, balls slapping your wet pussy. You cry on top of him, his cock sliding up so easily as you're dripping wet, on the verge of your orgasm.
His head hits your sweet spot so deliciously, making you see stars. "Oh, gosh, I'm gonna cum," you hurriedly warn him, boobs also jiggling at the intensity of Jimin's thrusts.
"Fuck, me too, sweetheart," he breathes out shakily, gripping your hips tightly, fingers digging into your damp skin.
You lay your hands on his shoulders, arching your back as his thick cock keeps brushing over your sensitive spot inside of you. You soon cum around him, pussy clenching around him repeatedly and thighs shaking beside his body.
Your walls closing tightly around him is his last stroke and his hips steady. His cock twitches and he releases himself deep into your cunt, shooting long strings of cum against your walls.
You lazily grind on him, driving off both of your highs, limbs trembling.
You look down where your bodies connect and you see his cum has fallen down all over yourselves at how much there was. Your inner thighs are covered as well as his pelvis and balls.
You slowly lift up your hips and his cock slips out of you, slapping down on his stomach. You're both trying to catch your breaths, looking into each other's eyes, perhaps thinking about the right thing to say.
You drop yourself beside him on the bed and he passes his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into a warm and soft embrace. He kisses the top of your head and you smile, placing your palm down on his chest.
"Was really good, but we need to clean ourselves." Jimin says, getting out of bed. You get a glimpse of the big tattoo on his back; the cycle of the moon and the two other drawings above his elbows before he turns around. "Coming with me?" He proposes.
You nod your head, biting down on your lip to refrain a smile. "Yeah."
.
.
.
a.n.: hope it was good?!!?!? 🥺 idk came straight from my fantasy so... but anyway just wanna say i start uni in like a week so if call me doesn't come as soon, it's normal (if it comes soon y'all need to scold me because my stupid lazy brain has to study). i hate school, but hey, maybe... enemies to lovers?! that'd be cool
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kingofbodyrolls · 3 months
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The Winter Collection | pjm
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A series of one-shots that follows our snowstorm couple. They can be read stand alone or chronologically in the mini series. 
I really want to call them drabbles, but we both know that they are too long for that 🤣 But they will be short (under 10k). They’ll all follow the same theme = snow and it’ll just be absurd silly fun, nothing serious here 😝
Pairing: Jimin x female reader AU + genres: enemies to lovers, humor/crack, smut. Rating: Mature/explicit/R18 - this is mature/explicit content, so minors, please do not interact.
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❄️ Stuck in a Snowstorm Summary: You don’t know how you ended up here. Stuck with your mortal enemy, Park Jimin, in you car – in a fucking snowstorm. Word count: 6.1K | Read → Stuck in a Snowstorm [AO3]
❄️ Stuck at a Christmas Party  Summary: It’s Seokjin’s Christmas party and you’re trying your best to be social with your friends, but it’s really hard when you feel the burning stare of your nemesis, Park Jimin, lighting your skin on fire. It doesn’t help when you feel his hand between your legs under the dinner table. Word count: 5.1K | Read → Stuck at a Christmas Party [AO3]
❄️ Stuck in a Cabin Summary: TBA Word count: TBA | Read → TBA
...maybe more to come!
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7ndipity · 3 months
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Sharing a Bed With Their Crush
Ot7 x Reader
Summary: How they would react to sharing a bed with their crush.
Warnings: swearing, not proofread
A/N: Thanks to the lovely anon who requested this, though now I have to ask myself how have I run this blog for this long without using the “And there was only one bed!” trope?!
Masterlist
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Jin: He tries to be nonchalant and acts like it’s not a big deal, but you can tell he’s actually super nervous. Sticks to his side of the bed and tries to just go to sleep, but after a bit, you both realize that you’re still wide awake and end up kinda laughing about the whole thing. You end up talking for a while until you both fall asleep. Wakes up the next morning still curled towards you, just watching you for a bit until you start to stir and then pretends to still be asleep(but fails bc you can see his ears turning red)
Yoongi: There’s definitely some initial awkwardness, he tries offering to just take the couch or the floor, but you won’t hear of it. Once you're both in the bed and settled on your respective sides, he relaxes surprisingly quickly. It feels really natural and almost normal in a way? Like why haven't you been doing this already? He ends up sleeping better than he has in weeks, breaking into a tiny grin as soon as he wakes up and catches sight of you sleeping peacefully next to him.
Hobi: He’s soo fucking nervous, he almost falls of the bed because he’s stuck soo close to the edge of the mattress, not wanting to make you feel crowded or uncomfortable. Calms down a bit after you let him know that you’re alright and that you don’t mind being in close quarters with him. Freaks out a lil when he wakes up wrapped around you, but he doesn’t dare move at first until you shift closer, slipping an arm around him as well and making his heart almost explode with happiness.
Namjoon: Tries to be chill and remind himself that it’s not really a big deal, but he can’t help freaking out just a lil bit inside. Sticks to his side of the bed and tries not to move too much to avoid bothering you. Wakes up in the middle of the night to you tucking yourself against his side for warmth, making him absolutely melt inside, instinctively wrapping a protective arm around you. The two of you wake up in the morning completely tangled together, but neither of you are willing to be the first to pull away.
Jimin: He tries so hard to be a gentleman about it, offering to sleep on the floor, keeping to the farthest edge of the mattress from you. You’d almost think he hates you from the way he’s acting, but nothing could be farther from the truth, he’s just desperate to avoid making you uncomfortable. Somehow still ends up waking up spooning you and tries to scooch away before you realize, but when you whine and snuggle closer to him, his brain just fritzes out and he can’t help pulling you closer, burying his face in your neck.
Taehyung: Has the biggest, shit-eating grin on his face, teasing you the whole time you’re both getting ready for bed. Until you actually get in the bed, and then he suddenly turns shy, flustered at how cute and cozy you look and hyper aware of your warmth radiating from your side of the bed. He’s a cuddly sleeper, so he winds up gravitating towards you during the night. Realizes waking up next to you is how he wants to wake up for the rest of his life, and starts trying to plan the right way to tell you so.
Jungkook: He acts super chill about it, making lil jokes left and right, but on the inside he is screaming. He legitimately doesn’t know how to act; should he face away, or will that come off as cold and rude? But what if you think he’s trying to put the moves on you if he faces towards you?! His anxiety disappears tho the moment you roll over during the night and cuddle into his side. When you wake up in the morning, you get a lil shy about hugging him in your sleep, but he’s just grinning like an idiot and kisses you on the cheek, saying that he didn’t mind at all.
Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz @feminympho
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