#joe biden ice cream button

[rightnewshindi]

रूस की पोलैंड पर हमले की आशंका के बीच जो बाइडेन से मिले राष्ट्रपति डूडा, जानें अमेरिका ने क्या कहा

रूस की पोलैंड पर हमले की आशंका के बीच जो बाइडेन से मिले राष्ट्रपति डूडा, जानें अमेरिका ने क्या कहा

Washington News: रुस-यूक्रेन युद्ध के बीच पोलैंड के राष्ट्रपति और प्रधानमंत्री के संयुक्त अमेरिका दौरे ने दुनिया का ध्यान आकर्षित किया है. पॉलिश राष्ट्रपति ने यहां यूरोप के भविष्य पर बड़ी चिंता जताई. उन्होंने कहा कि अगर पुतिन यूक्रेन जीत गए तो वो अपने युद्ध का दायरा बढ़ा सकते हैं. राष्ट्रपति आंद्रेज डूडा ने पोलैंड और अन्य देशों पर संभावित रुसी अक्रमण को लेकर चिंता जताई, जिस पर हिटलर के हमले ने…

[kragehund-est]

the dumbest fucking people known to mankind: bro omg this is SO realistic, can you believe it's AI? it fooled me until i checked the source! Scary times we're living in!!!

the image in question: joe biden (with airbrush-smooth skin and three earlobes) eating ice cream while pressing a button that says "NUUKE ALL RE三AL AMNERICAN PATRIOTES"

[briochethebreadmaker]

joe biden X barney dinosaur

Joe sat staring longingly at his purple ice cream - remembering the fun of last night. Vivid flashbacks came to him. The strong soft arms that delicately cradled his face were now gone. The tight hairy chest that he used as a pillow was now gone as well. His sweet face and alluring charm and most of all his smile - sugar sweet dunked in honey - was also gone.

He remembered his deep melodic voice that vibrates across his chest like a drum and he shed a tear. His ice cream started to melt and drip down - the purple beautifully contrasting with the pale white of his skin. Barney now had a taste for oranges.

He stared at someone's sandals and it felt as if someone had punched him in the face. They looked remarkably similar to his cat maid outfits sandals, the one that barney loved him wearing. The memories were haunting - echoing in his mind like a fragments of time he was trying to chase but knew he would never get back.

He imagined trump in the cat maid outfit, imagined how now barney played with his fluffy hair and not his balding hair, maybe that's why barney left him. The breath whispered up his neck - he could almost hear barney now. This was the bench they always sat on, he still knew barney favourite ice cream, shrek yummy yummy toe slurp - a specialty only this chain carried.

He thought about Trump's orange skin and felt an unfamiliar emotion - passion. He wasn't .. envious? He delved deeper into this newfound desire. He found himself wanting to feel his hair - to look into his eyes and see the brain that thought of the wall. He wanted to be inextricably close - to be intertwined with him - body and soul. To be mess of limbs tangled up in sheets - with a few purple ones as well. For them to spoon feed ice cream to each other, for them to make donkey shit flavoured waffles. He had a crush on trump?

He couldn't contain his excitement. He wrangled the familiar number - pressing those buttons made him feel himself again - though pangs of sadness shot through him remembering how they broke up. Over the phone he called him and said ‘trumps the only one for me - sorry joe’ and hung up. Joe was in his maid outfit waiting for Barney to come home but after that call he collapsed into a puddle of tears sniffling and sobbing for the rest of the night.

He pushed that aside and rang the number. 1 ring. 2 rings. 3 rings. Click.

‘Joe?’

He held in a breath - his voice made him tear up

‘Hi barney’

They both awkwardly paused, longing to touch each other.

‘What do you want Joe’

‘I did some soul searching and found out that I like Trump - do you want to have a relationship with both of us?’

There - it was off his chest. Silence lingered in the air

‘Why don’t you come over tomorrow night?’

To be continued …

[anthonybialy]

Ideology Minus Ideas

Enjoying spending your money is a secret Joe Biden's worse at keeping than his inability to button his shirt. How does a circle that wide fit into such a slim hole? Your self-appointed boss wishes we'd forget what happens when his ideology gets put into action like he does his staff's names.

Biden’s wises were granted. He got his dream policies made real along with a slot car track. A sheet pizza and claw machine win should technically count as two. But nobody wants to let down such a special elder. Watch for what you want coming into fruition, as you might phrase the wish to the genie as poorly as your president.

Getting everything desired is a curse for pompous morons. Not realizing consequences are pending and unpredictably predictable is natural for those who think they've accounted for all of them. A busy government illustrates the difference between getting things done and doing useful things.

Using elections to take away choices would almost be clever if the results didn't contain so much agony. Alleged leaders aren't plotting that deeply even if ultimate domination is their obvious goal. Grabbing every bit of power in little fits is the life work of big schemers who can't scheme big. Stagnation in every sense would be a fitting punishment if it weren't also inflicted on everyone else.

It's tough to finally relax and spend regular payments for not working when it takes multiple handouts of cash to buy salad dressing. Unlimited free money has a downside. Next, you'll tell me ice cream stops tasting so delicious if served as every meal.

Too much to spend was supposed to be a good thing. But there aren't enough filled burlap sacks with dollar signs to afford shoelaces. Prices stubbornly refused stay stationary, which means we need a law making everything affordable. Sure, ordering a price freeze wouldn't be as good as the government making them free, but heroic legislators can only pass so many bills. At least there are no products to buy.

We couldn't get to stores with empty shelves thanks to empty fuel tanks. Consistency is a blessing that saves us from further disappointment. Limiting fuel saves the Earth, unless you're one of the sad and hungry people on it. The country is going nowhere a bit more literally than even Biden could've guessed.

Your neck isn't supposed to hurt, claims the goon who has you in the sleeper. It's tough to pretend pain isn't the result when infliction was their goal all along. Democrats have to pretend they're upset about a gallon of gasoline costing even more than milk that's suddenly unaffordable. Regular inflation is so boring.

Political scientists encourage you to use lethargic energy. Operating cars that need plugs is coming by force in case you don't get the message that you're supposed to love the Earth. You should ignore the methods of powering civilization it provides while switching to unreliable ones like strong gusts and particularly sunny days. Similarly, organic mice repellants don't work like reassuring traps. It only seems cruel if you fail to grasp how nature works.

It's too bad Russia isn't run by successful American businesspeople, as Biden would've stopped it. If we really wanted to halt ghastly stampeders, let our president run their economy.

International pusillanimous is supposed to get troubled countries to start being cool. But it turns out rampaging chaos is the result. You may be starting to suspect that our arrogant decadent imperialistic capitalism wasn't the problem. Bullies grasp perverse incentives instead of good grades.

At least the examples are clear. Liberals can’t claim constant agony results from anything but liberalism in action. Elizabeth Warren-style whining about record profits negates to mention why prices are up and how little said leftover cash is worth.

There's no ideological deviation as is regrettably seen during Republican times, like pretending isolationist tariff fan Donald Trump was a Randian zero-government enthusiast. He didn't even read his own books. Meddling was the only vigorous thing about the last ostensible conservative.

Letting politicians decide for us works as long as you don't try it. Our betters planned for everything except how things would happen next. Upsetting them by actually attempting to cope with their elaborate designs for perfecting existence means failure is our fault. Increasing prices while making items scarce is sort of a way to understand economics.

It's bad enough politicians keep falling for the theory. The problem is voters who keep falling for the politicians. Keen political observers struggle to determine whether the faction actually believes the risible ideology is helping or if they're just seeking breakdowns to exploit. Which inspires more?

Our world at least enjoys a bad example from which to learn. I think we have enough if we'd like to stop inflicting valuable lessons upon ourselves. We can't afford anything with all our free money, which at least means rampaging thieves can only steal so much. The dearth of personal inventory doesn't apply to global supervillains who will always find another country to shoplift.

Bringing to mind past agonies might seem like a way to make the present ache, too. But thinking about what hurt could help us avoid it. The afflicted may as well find something useful in suffering, namely how to not pretend government is good at anything any more than the politicians who fill its voids are. We can either remember how silly it is to bribe reality into letting us get rich or keep trying to gain without earning. If you believe in the latter, you can find someone who wants you to run for office.

[abangtech]

Biden campaign releases a flurry of digital DIY projects and virtual banners. Yes, there are Zoom backgrounds

2020 is a nightmare year by most metrics, and it’s also a worst-case-scenario emerging out of a best-case-scenario for Joe Biden. After trailing in early primary states, Biden came crashing back on a stunning wave of Super Tuesday support. Now the presumptive Democratic nominee in the midst of a global health crisis that’s immobilized the U.S. workforce and somehow even further polarized American politics, the former Vice President will have to navigate completely uncharted waters to find a path to the presidency.

Biden—not the most internetty candidate out of 2020’s wide Democratic field by a long shot— is now tasked with getting creative, connecting with voters not at rallies or traditional events, the kind of thing the famously affable candidate excels at, but through screens. Making those connections is crucial for attracting less engaged voters, wrangling straying progressives and even maintaining its body of existing supporters, who need to be kept energized to power the campaign into the general election.

To that end, the Biden campaign is rolling out a new collection of digital assets to energize supporters stuck at home and to communicate the Biden brand’s visual language to everybody else. The selection of “Team Joe swag” includes some DIY options for supporters like big “No Malarkey!” home window placards and “We want Joe” button templates.

The campaign is also releasing an array of print-friendly coloring book pages to amuse idle politically-inclined progeny. Some of the pages thank frontline workers and immortalize Biden’s two german shepherds in crayon, while others depict Biden’s more meme-worthy symbols: ice cream cones and his trademark aviator sunglasses. (A viral moment from 2014 combined the two.)

For supporters who aren’t leaning into arts and crafts just yet, there’s “Joementum” phone wallpapers, banners optimized for social media and yes, a full set of Zoom backgrounds depicting Biden’s recent campaign stage: his home library.

Some critics say he needs to ditch his basement studio, but Biden said he plans to follow public health guidelines, hitting the virtual campaign trail from his now-expanded home setup in Delaware via virtual town halls and video chats, like his recent Instagram Live sit-down with U.S. soccer superstar and former Warrenite Megan Rapinoe.

The signs and wallpapers are just a tiny part of the campaign’s big picture, but depending on what comes after, a candidate’s visual signature can sear a political moment into the collective consciousness. Think Obama’s 2008 “Hope” poster by the artist Shepard Fairey, later acquired by National Portrait Gallery (Fairey himself later denounced the Obama administration’s drone program). Or Trump’s telltale red MAGA hats, which no one will be forgetting any time soon, regardless of how the general election shakes out.

Warm and fuzzy

For a campaign stuck indoors, visual branding is more important than ever. Biden’s visual brand mostly seems to focus on positive feelings that bring people together—kindness, faith, togetherness—rather than policy specifics or even “dump Trump” style calls to action.

“We want to find ways to make people feel involved while they’re cooped up at home,” the campaign’s Deputy National Press Secretary Matt Hill said. “These are tools that are going to help everyone who is involved with the campaign communicate that visually in a time when everyone is particularly logged on.”

Much has been written about how the virtual race poses unique challenges for the Biden campaign. The presumptive Democratic nominee is a candidate best known for his affable, empathetic in-person demeanor. But empathy doesn’t always perform well online, particularly when cast against the sound and fury of the factually-unencumbered, cash-flush Trump campaign.

“Branding communicates values, and during this crisis we want to let Joe Biden’s values shine through,” Hill said. “Yes, it’s of course ice cream and aviators, but it’s also decency, empathy, hope, and everything that is just the polar opposite of Donald Trump.”

The campaign frames this in broad strokes, good-against-evil language, describing Biden’s online movement as one of “empathy and human connection” out to topple the dark forces at work on the internet. The campaign’s digital director Rob Flaherty has said that 2020 is not just a fight for America itself, but also a “battle for the soul of the internet.”

“Right now, people are craving empathy and good… it gives us an advantage,” Hill said. “You have one side that often fights to win the Twitterverse with vitriol, and then you have us,”

Joementum?

Biden’s campaign has come under some scrutiny in recent weeks for the perception that it’s been slow to adapt to the pandemic era. Obama campaign veterans David Plouffe and David Axelrod penned a New York Times op-ed in early May calling for Biden to step up his digital efforts, likening his current broadcasts to “an astronaut beaming back to earth.”

After weeks of concern from insiders worried the Biden campaign might not be building the online momentum it needs, the campaign just beefed up its previously lean team with a flurry of new hires. The new talent will particularly build out the campaign’s digital operations, which it plans to double in size.

The hires include former Elizabeth Warren staffer Caitlin Mitchell, who will advise the Biden camp on digital strategy and help it scale up, Buzzfeed Video and Kamala Harris campaign alum Andrew Gauthier, who joins the Biden campaign as its video director and Robyn Kanner, previously Beto for America’s creative director, to lead design and branding.

It will be interesting to see what else emerges out of the “Biden brand,” which doesn’t translate as easily to organic virality as Bernie’s all-purpose “I’m once again asking” meme or the somehow-not-cloying antics of Elizabeth Warren’s lovable golden retriever Bailey. At least for now, the campaign doesn’t seem to view that as a problem.

But cracking virtual campaigning is not the only headwind for the Biden campaign at the moment. Sexual assault allegations by former Biden Senate aide Tara Reade made their way into mainstream reporting in April. And if formulating a response to such serious allegations would be delicate under normal circumstances, the Biden campaign has had to figure out how do it from a silo.

With its early technical difficulties ironed out, the Biden campaign may have a bit more breathing room to get creative. The campaign is focused on what it views as its “core platforms” for now—Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat—but it plans to both “invest more deeply” in those and also look at other platforms in the process of scaling up.

“We’ve already seen volunteers expand on Discord, Reddit, Pinterest and elsewhere,” Biden campaign Director of Digital Content Pam Stamoulis told TechCrunch.

Stamoulis also notes that the campaign is in “close communication” with the major social platforms where it focuses its efforts.

“… We have scheduled and consistent check in times to go over best practices, recommendations, new tools and brainstorm ideas and concepts to help optimize our use of their platforms,” Stamoulis said. “We anticipate working closely with platforms as we continue to move into the general.”

Biden’s stay-the-course digital strategy seems to reflect the thinking of his unlikely Super Tuesday coup, believing that you need the biggest coalition possible and you don’t necessarily build it through the buzziest politics or the flashiest moments. The campaign doesn’t want Biden to go viral as much as it wants him to connect with the most people in the broadest possible sense.

And to his credit, between the South Carolina comeback and his team-of-rivals Super Tuesday trick, Biden pulled it all off somehow. If there’s anything we can count on in 2020, whether it’s U.S. politics or a global health reckoning, it’s that we don’t know what the hell is going to happen. That lesson seems especially resonant for the extremely online among us, who seem to discover again and again that we are but a tiny, self-selecting sliver of the American electorate.

There’s no word on if we’ll see Biden trading island codes for Animal Crossing à la AOC or a virtual likeness of the candidate looming over Fortnite’s map psychedelic Travis Scott-style, but in a truly unusual election year, nothing is quite off the table.

Source

The post Biden campaign releases a flurry of digital DIY projects and virtual banners. Yes, there are Zoom backgrounds appeared first on abangtech.

from abangtech https://abangtech.com/biden-campaign-releases-a-flurry-of-digital-diy-projects-and-virtual-banners-yes-there-are-zoom-backgrounds/

[un-enfant-immature]

Biden campaign releases a flurry of digital DIY projects and virtual banners. Yes, there are Zoom backgrounds

2020 is a nightmare year by most metrics, and it’s also a worst-case-scenario emerging out of a best-case-scenario for Joe Biden . After trailing in early primary states, Biden came crashing back on a stunning wave of Super Tuesday support. Now the presumptive Democratic nominee in the midst of a global health crisis that’s immobilized the U.S. workforce and somehow even further polarized American politics, the former Vice President will have to navigate completely uncharted waters to find a path to the presidency.

Biden—not the most internetty candidate out of 2020’s wide Democratic field by a long shot— is now tasked with getting creative, connecting with voters not at rallies or traditional events, the kind of thing the famously affable candidate excels at, but through screens. Making those connections is crucial for attracting less engaged voters, wrangling straying progressives and even maintaining its body of existing supporters, who need to be kept energized to power the campaign into the general election.

To that end, the Biden campaign is rolling out a new collection of digital assets to energize supporters stuck at home and to communicate the Biden brand’s visual language to everybody else. The selection of “Team Joe swag” includes some DIY options for supporters like big “No Malarkey!” home window placards and “We want Joe” button templates.

The campaign is also releasing an array of print-friendly coloring book pages to amuse idle politically-inclined progeny. Some of the pages thank frontline workers and immortalize Biden’s two german shepherds in crayon, while others depict Biden’s more meme-worthy symbols: ice cream cones and his trademark aviator sunglasses. (A viral moment from 2014 combined the two.)

For supporters who aren’t leaning into arts and crafts just yet, there’s “Joementum” phone wallpapers, banners optimized for social media and yes, a full set of Zoom backgrounds depicting Biden’s recent campaign stage: his home library.

Some critics say he needs to ditch his basement studio, but Biden said he plans to follow public health guidelines, hitting the virtual campaign trail from his now-expanded home setup in Delaware via virtual town halls and video chats, like his recent Instagram Live sit-down with U.S. soccer superstar and former Warrenite Megan Rapinoe.

The signs and wallpapers are just a tiny part of the campaign’s big picture, but depending on what comes after, a candidate’s visual signature can sear a political moment into the collective consciousness. Think Obama’s 2008 “Hope” poster by the artist Shepard Fairey, later acquired by National Portrait Gallery (Fairey himself later denounced the Obama administration’s drone program). Or Trump’s telltale red MAGA hats, which no one will be forgetting any time soon, regardless of how the general election shakes out.

Warm and fuzzy

For a campaign stuck indoors, visual branding is more important than ever. Biden’s visual brand mostly seems to focus on positive feelings that bring people together—kindness, faith, togetherness—rather than policy specifics or even “dump Trump” style calls to action.

“We want to find ways to make people feel involved while they’re cooped up at home,” the campaign’s Deputy National Press Secretary Matt Hill said. “These are tools that are going to help everyone who is involved with the campaign communicate that visually in a time when everyone is particularly logged on.”

Much has been written about how the virtual race poses unique challenges for the Biden campaign. The presumptive Democratic nominee is a candidate best known for his affable, empathetic in-person demeanor. But empathy doesn’t always perform well online, particularly when cast against the sound and fury of the factually-unencumbered, cash-flush Trump campaign.

“Branding communicates values, and during this crisis we want to let Joe Biden’s values shine through,” Hill said. “Yes, it’s of course ice cream and aviators, but it’s also decency, empathy, hope, and everything that is just the polar opposite of Donald Trump.”

The campaign frames this in broad strokes, good-against-evil language, describing Biden’s online movement as one of “empathy and human connection” out to topple the dark forces at work on the internet. The campaign’s digital director Rob Flaherty has said that 2020 is not just a fight for America itself, but also a “battle for the soul of the internet.”

“Right now, people are craving empathy and good… it gives us an advantage,” Hill said. “You have one side that often fights to win the Twitterverse with vitriol, and then you have us,”

Democrats are using a data scientist’s secret sauce to flip Texas blue

Joementum?

Biden’s campaign has come under some scrutiny in recent weeks for the perception that it’s been slow to adapt to the pandemic era. Obama campaign veterans David Plouffe and David Axelrod penned a New York Times op-ed in early May calling for Biden to step up his digital efforts, likening his current broadcasts to “an astronaut beaming back to earth.”

After weeks of concern from insiders worried the Biden campaign might not be building the online momentum it needs, the campaign just beefed up its previously lean team with a flurry of new hires. The new talent will particularly build out the campaign’s digital operations, which it plans to double in size.

The hires include former Elizabeth Warren staffer Caitlin Mitchell, who will advise the Biden camp on digital strategy and help it scale up, Buzzfeed Video and Kamala Harris campaign alum Andrew Gauthier, who joins the Biden campaign as its video director and Robyn Kanner, previously Beto for America’s creative director, to lead design and branding.

It will be interesting to see what else emerges out of the “Biden brand,” which doesn’t translate as easily to organic virality as Bernie’s all-purpose “I’m once again asking” meme or the somehow-not-cloying antics of Elizabeth Warren’s lovable golden retriever Bailey. At least for now, the campaign doesn’t seem to view that as a problem.

But cracking virtual campaigning is not the only headwind for the Biden campaign at the moment. Sexual assault allegations by former Biden Senate aide Tara Reade made their way into mainstream reporting in April. And if formulating a response to such serious allegations would be delicate under normal circumstances, the Biden campaign has had to figure out how do it from a silo.

With its early technical difficulties ironed out, the Biden campaign may have a bit more breathing room to get creative. The campaign is focused on what it views as its “core platforms” for now—Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat—but it plans to both “invest more deeply” in those and also look at other platforms in the process of scaling up.

“We’ve already seen volunteers expand on Discord, Reddit, Pinterest and elsewhere,” Biden campaign Director of Digital Content Pam Stamoulis told TechCrunch.

Stamoulis also notes that the campaign is in “close communication” with the major social platforms where it focuses its efforts.

“… We have scheduled and consistent check in times to go over best practices, recommendations, new tools and brainstorm ideas and concepts to help optimize our use of their platforms,” Stamoulis said. “We anticipate working closely with platforms as we continue to move into the general.”

Biden’s stay-the-course digital strategy seems to reflect the thinking of his unlikely Super Tuesday coup, believing that you need the biggest coalition possible and you don’t necessarily build it through the buzziest politics or the flashiest moments. The campaign doesn’t want Biden to go viral as much as it wants him to connect with the most people in the broadest possible sense.

And to his credit, between the South Carolina comeback and his team-of-rivals Super Tuesday trick, Biden pulled it all off somehow. If there’s anything we can count on in 2020, whether it’s U.S. politics or a global health reckoning, it’s that we don’t know what the hell is going to happen. That lesson seems especially resonant for the extremely online among us, who seem to discover again and again that we are but a tiny, self-selecting sliver of the American electorate.

There’s no word on if we’ll see Biden trading island codes for Animal Crossing à la AOC or a virtual likeness of the candidate looming over Fortnite’s map psychedelic Travis Scott-style, but in a truly unusual election year, nothing is quite off the table.

Vote-by-mail should be having its moment. Will it?

[anthonybialy]

Executive Limit

Elect to stop electing one person to boss us around. An allegedly free country shouldn't be defined by whoever wins that single office. Autonomous creatures infuriatingly presently accept a constant stream of orders from someone who's supposed to keep enemies out of our living rooms instead of controlling what happens within them. The fridge is next to the couch because I want it there.

Limit the presidency not just because it shows the twerp who's boss. The most regrettable election in memory is merely a fine recent reason to have an executive so irrelevant that we forget the person's name. Whoever won shows up on the news every three weeks and independent humans go “Oh, right.” Living without a politician's name in mind would be a welcome contrast from the current status where poor subjects wake up to their minds projecting the name before eyes open.

Use the selection of one of the two worst candidates possible as an excuse if that's necessary. The next panic is unplanned but inevitably looming. Delusional goons exploit every crisis as an excuse to control humans they find less enlightened despite ample contrary proof. It's about time to use current events as a reason to leave people the hell alone.

Respecting legal limits for a change is not just when you loathe the electoral conqueror. Don't wait to lust after being told what to do when the person who got your vote wins. Expanding authority is cherished by the sort of visionaries who don't think their faction could ever lose an election. How is it possible when he's so awesome? Voters could never disagree. Joe Biden is incapable of running either the economy or our self-worth.

Despite mean parents preventing you from having ice cream soup for dinner, it's good to have restrictions. The Constitution is still technically legally binding. We have one in case anyone forgot. Restraints aren't merely philosophically noble: anything that's too fun to use against the other side might be turned on you.

A contained executive would be worthwhile even aside from partisan slap fights. It might be good to not let the winning brute act like a supernaturally-appointed regent whose daily whims become policy. The policies created without all that legislative claptrap might not be visionary. But would you even want a desired edict imposed? The precedent surely wouldn't be abused by unchecked wannabe autocrats.

Nobody should be disappointed by how much won't be deemed legally binding. The one person on that one branch isn't a dictator, to the lament of partisans and enemies of being serious about having a free country. Those who use the term “the Republic” when freaking about Trump sure are eager to enable horrifying overreaches of power. If only John Kerry could be allowed to shutter industry, we'd finally be able to breathe.

Except for the scary things that actually happen, much of what we fear never comes into being. That's quite the relief. Hyper election followers always forget to verify how many proposals are actually enacted by mouthy presidential hopefuls. Or, they don't care, which may or may not be more charitable. But not getting to snap their dreams into being because of these dang checks and balances is the greatest gift delusional politicians could receive.

Not examining what presidents actually do is playing their game. They run their mouths for success, claim game players. A successful contender may not have actually implemented what they promised. I apologize for cynicism. That whole law having to start as a bill claptrap is apparently still technically in effect.

Stop feeling inspired by these atrocious nitwits to take away the mystique. Let whoever's enough of an arrogant suck-up enough to get to the office run wild to experience the agonizing difference between concepts and reality. That rather painful lesson is relearned by humans daily.

My preferred messiah will run Washington properly. That's what elections are about. America couldn't be a better argument for punching government than the sort of pompous morons elected to it. It's important to only call it service ironically.

The president should get few responsibilities for reasons that become clearer after every election. There's not much more to the job than tapping the missile button any time a jerk non-America country dares hassle the best place. It shouldn't take a foreign threat to unite us in suspicious contempt of whatever raging dolt kissed enough Electoral College asses to skip searching for real work.

Limit the position to true tasks, like accepting jerseys from championship teams. If everyone promises to not treat visiting the president after winning some tournament as a partisan act, we might be able to keep him busy enough to never address his paperwork stack. Graciously shaking hands with a jerk is what politics should be about. The job and not America's rulebook should be largely useless.

[viralhottopics]

RIP, Biden memes: How the VP awakened the internet’s most earnest humor

Image: Olivier Douliery-Pool/Getty Images

Joe Biden is leaving office, and with him go the Biden memes.

The internet, predictably, is already mourning. Even President Obama acknowledged the end of an era as he presented Biden with the Presidential Medal of Freedom last week. “This … gives the internet one last chance to talk about our bromance,” he said. (It took that chance, heartily.)

SEE ALSO: #TBT: Young Joe Biden was a dapper man indeed

From now till 2020, can we keep Joe Biden memes alive to make me not cry?

Nadia Aboulhosn (@nadiaaboulhosn) January 14, 2017

It’s not difficult to guess why the internet will take this loss so hard. First, and perhaps most depressingly, there’s no clear replacement: policy aside, it’s nearly impossible to imagine vice president-elect Mike Pence eating ice cream, laughing or enjoying anything.

Therein lies Biden’s appeal as a public figure: he is a serious, veteran leader who also enjoys life. Eats a sh*t-ton of ice cream. Does not eat that ice cream delicately.

And that means he’s highly meme-able.

Biden became perfect foil for President Obama, a man so poised he often seems unflappable. Meme Biden was weird Uncle Joe, the prankster the perfect goofball “brother” to Obama’s straight man.

Better yet, the two really seemed to care for each other: a united front who were also united friends.

Obama: Wave to the people, Joe.

Biden: LET’S BE A TWO HEADED WAVING PRESIDENT

Obama: No, Joe. Let go of me.

Biden: http://pic.twitter.com/zf7ZHkB3my

Reverend Scott (@Reverend_Scott) December 11, 2014

Happy 55th, Barack! A brother to me, a best friend forever. http://pic.twitter.com/uNsxouTKOO

Vice President Biden (@VP) August 4, 2016

After Trump’s victory, Meme Biden’s role became more pointed. He assumed the role of the internet’s slightly petty ally, plotting elaborate pranks and schemes not for any real reason just to push the president-elect’s buttons.

To progressives feeling crushed and helpless in the wake of the election, Meme Biden’s antics became a reason to finally laugh a little, a silver lining where none could really ever exist.

Biden: I’m not giving them the wifi password

Obama: Joe…

Biden: I said what I said http://pic.twitter.com/l17SaIeQke

uncle jesse (@pieceofjay) November 11, 2016

Biden: Ok here’s the plan: have you seen Home Alone Obama: Joe, no Biden: Just one booby trap Obama: Joe http://pic.twitter.com/IDTc2L1sKF

Dean E. S. Richard (@deanfortythree) November 11, 2016

biden: cmon you gotta print a fake birth certificate, put it in an envelope labeled “SECRET” and leave it in the oval office desk obama: joe http://pic.twitter.com/UTtv1JkE5o

jomny sun (@jonnysun) November 11, 2016

Joe: I hid all the pens from Trump Obama: Why? Joe: Because he bringing his own. Obama: ??? Joe: HE’S BRINGING HIS OWN PENCE http://pic.twitter.com/uni3WUd4X3

The Hashtagonist (@TheHashtag0nist) November 12, 2016

Biden: What if we paint the Mexican flag in the office Obama: Joe, no Biden: I already ordered the paint Obama: Joe http://pic.twitter.com/mCCh6OPQRk

dan #1 oikawa stan (@kusoaikon) November 11, 2016

Of course, there’s also The Onion‘s Biden: a muscle car-loving, Icehouse-swilling nostalgia hound who hitch-hiked to the DNC and spent his last day in the White House searching for his missing pet snake. But even “Diamond Joe” is strangely earnest.

“Gotta get her looking good so I can impress the chicks when I’m cruising down Pennsylvania [Avenue],” he says of his hypothetical Trans-Am.

The President Of Vice: The Onion Looks Back At Two Terms With Diamond Joe Biden https://t.co/Js2SjTkGva http://pic.twitter.com/WOHVgf7M4a

The Onion (@TheOnion) January 18, 2017

In fact, there’s a unmistakable sincerity in most Biden memes, an emotional transparency that dovetails with Biden’s warm public personality. That warmth isn’t just limited to pranks and finger guns, either: Biden, one of the most powerful people in the world, can’t help but express himself. He has no poker face he hasn’t thought that far.

biden: i am one with the force, the force is with me

obama: what?

biden: nothing http://pic.twitter.com/xAlcWBPM4M

Colin Jones (@colinjones) January 14, 2017

And as a big Jumbotron pops up in front of the Lincoln Memorial, that sincerity that trademark Biden joy is something the internet wants, just before the Trump era kicks in, to celebrate.

Image: Chip Somodeville/Getty Images

So long, VP Biden. And thanks for all the memes.

BONUS: Watch Joe Biden get snubbed by a baby

Read more: http://ift.tt/2jtimsK

from RIP, Biden memes: How the VP awakened the internet’s most earnest humor