#joking about hamster deaths is so fucking weird!!!!

[the-martyrfication-of-the-matron]

Okay, finished rebirth episode 2, not as bad as episode 1 to me (I haven’t even finished talking about my episode 1 thoughts so… mmm…)

To summarise some of my notes:

Aphmau is autistic to me.

Rebirth garroth is a virgin (blushes when holding hands). Og garroth is a Chad (literally gave his lord a ring after basically deciding to be the father of her son)

I think Garroth shouldn’t have seen her do magic and only have seen the results of the magic. He should’ve walked over after she’d done her whole light show, and then we can recycle an OG line, which is iconic, with a bit of readjustment; the farm looks nicer… did you do this? And then have aph stare at him with her big babydoll eyes and scamper off without saying a word. That’s a true MCD remake.

Like genuinely if they wanted to keep the spirit of MCD, that small change would make me literally dickride this series SO HARD

Aph being dumb is because Jesson thinks we as the viewers are dumb and need to be spoonfed lore, and so aph is dumb and has to be spoonfed lore. Instead of just… giving it to us naturally.

Most og-accurate choice was Garroth trying to pressure aph into doing more magic. He’s canonically very… press-y about her doing labour for Phoenix drop.

Garroth needs to stop sending people into dangerous situations ahead of himself, especially children. He’s the head guard. Act like it.

Vylad would be sneakier than that.

Even tho OG jokes that Dale and Molly are arranged married, Rebirth makes a bit of a point that Molly ‘chose’ him. I can kinda understand why, but I think their marriage being arranged wouldn’t have been a particularly bad thing to leave in.

I wasn’t paying attention during any of the Brenmau interactions because I’m trash. But I do love the dynamic they’re given, and I think they’re being set up better than Aphmau and her other friendships so far. She spent the episode helping him willingly, and he paid her back in turn by being honest with her, and also giving her praise when she deserved it.

Brendan is the first to call Aph lord. I’m conflicted about this, but leaning towards hatred. It undermines her entire dynamic with Zenix in the original, and I understand they’re leaning for a more MyS-accurate Zenix in Rebirth, but I hate that it’s at the cost of what made him so interesting to me originally. His dynamic with Aphmau is frankly one of the more interesting friendships in early MCD and to see it erased when it was such an integral plot point is… not my favourite thing.

Kiki is brought in earlier, she comes into town because of the misery brought on by the lord’s death, and not Garroth’s shooting.

Aphmau weird girls her way to success.

Zenix is actually reasonable about the hamsters and I think one thing Rebirth does get right is that he is occasionally very reasonable. They are damaging crops and thus putting the livelihoods of Phoenix drop villagers at a risk. He is right to be irritated that Kiki has brought them to the village.

Kiki can only talk to Hamsters, but in OG, she can talk to more animals… like chickens, which is important for the Cadenza plot.

There’s a Zenix line I hate because it contributes to a particular trait they seem to be giving him in rebirth… but that’ll be its own post.

Garroth casually outs Aph as a magic user even though… I’m p sure they’re canonically murdered… so… what the fuck dude

Aph sneezing is cute.

[domes]

part, 14

Prompt: "A friend of mine tells that I talk in shorthand and then smudge it."

"I probably should not drive, I mean I could, probably." I say and throw the car keys in the air. No one catches them as I load in the back seat. I doesn't take long before the new guy is driving, with K next to him in the passenger seat. K asks me, If you were with here, why was Rilke carrying your sword?" I might as well tell him, though he might be a little disappointed, "I was just dropping her off and headed to work, but then I figured I’d be late, and I figured I hate that job, and if you both die the D&D game would be fucked, so I might as well die with you, so I took -- you remember that synthetic mescaline from when we tried to camp out to see the northern lights?" I pause to dry swallow two pills before continuing, "I took four and I want to see what it's like with molly. Plus you're gonna need me, while you were whatever whatever I studied the blade."

I want to open the window but it is so cold. I really always thought I would die some banal way. But what if I die in some weird grand fashion. Oh we're gonna look like a death cult or something. Small rodents, katana, and weird tomes, well I guess this just looks like a sketch book or whatever. Oh my god. I flinch as something touches my hand. I literally hit myself in the face. My eye hurts. Oh it's. The little. Mouse? Hamster? Seth looks back at me for a second before looking back at the road and asks, "You doing alright back there Electric Koolaid? Nermal tends to get affectionate when someone freaks out." Nermal. I pick Nermal up and she climbs my chest and snuggles into the nape of my neck. I kiss her little head. And do it again. She is right this is great. I feel pretty great. Rilke pats my leg in the way she does to say I'm about to joke so please take it as a joke, "You know those things carry the plague?” Prairie dog right. They are prairie dogs. Nermal chews on my beard a little. I give her another little head kiss and remember to joke back to Rilke so she knows I didn't take her joke wrong, "I mean sure they helped, but carried? The plague put in some real hard work too, kinda rude to dismiss all that."

Nermal falls asleep on my chest in a way that means I can no longer look out the window. So, I look through the notebook to pass the time. There are some interesting things smudged on the page I think I can read them if I can get to my phone and grab the light. I ask Seth, "The author of this notebook, left handed?" He does another half turn look back and responds, "Come to think of it, yea, why?" I manage to get my phone out without disturbing Nermal and by shining it's light through the back of the smudged spots, I think I can, yeah totally I can make out some writing. Is the naked rat a sacrifice? What I found. Something something. IT MAKES THEM REAL!

[cerealmonster15]

bros don’t put that “hamsters are connected to having fate of gruesome death” post on my dash I don’t wanna SEE IT ❌❌❌

[m-y-fandoms]

1 Thing I Love & 1 Thing I Hate About EVERY Danganronpa Character Part 1

Part 2

SPOILERS FOR ALL THREE MAIN GAMES

I’d love to hear our opinions as well in the comments or my inbox or DM’s! If you try this trend with DR characters, tag me!

Sayaka Maizono

♡ Her passion for her career and friends.

✘ The way she tries to screw over Makoto when the game had just begun. Like wait and see what happens before screwing over such a great guy? Leon didn’t deserve it either.

Leon Kuwata

♡ His voice actor (English), and how real and human his execution was in that we all would be so scared and irrational. It was just so iconic and sad as it’s our first introduction to the death in this series and we all think: “shit, this is real... they are really killing these kids.” I didn’t think it would be that brutal, just seeing his body limp at the end with the haunting music.

✘ His design is disgusting. I hate how he looks.

Chihiro Fujisaki

♡ So innocent, so kind, so intelligent

✘ Shouldn’t have been killed for such a stupid reason, also they did Mondo dirty with that motive for killing as well. Just a mess. As for the actual character, Chihiro cries right off the bat when you do your introductions and that was kind of annoying to me personally.

Mondo Oowada

♡ He has a lot of respect, understanding and emotions for someone I thought would be a hard-ass douche biker.

✘ The worst motive to kill ever in a game where you know you’re getting executed if you’re found out. Like you’d be extra careful and that’s his reason to kill? Lazy writing.

Celestia Ludenberg

♡ Bad bitch energy and her goth lolita design.

✘ Manipulation and double murder. Bad bitch energy only goes so far. Confidence is different then selfishness. Also, of all the chapter 3 triple murders... the worst motive to kill.

Kiyotaka Ishimaru

♡ Emotions: secure in his masculinity, able to cry, show emotions, and apologize when he’s wrong. He’s funny and likable.

✘ The Ishimondo white hair thing was stupid. Taka was fine on his own.

Hifumi Yamada

♡ Writing takes talent, fan fiction as much as any other style or genre. Also the talent of his voice actor (who also voices Kiibo/K1-B0).

✘ Literally everything else about him.

Sakura Oogami

♡ I love everything about her. I love her wisdom, loyalty, design, voice etc. Just step on me, mother.

✘ Why the hell would she ever agree to be a spy even if it meant the end of her dojo? I just don’t think she would do that rationally because she isn’t selfish. The others would suffer for her spying. She remedies this with redemption in her letter in chapter 4 but still she should’ve said no off the bat. Everyone had something to lose. The dojo wasn’t worth spying for monokuma. Also I just don’t think she would commit suicide. She can’t help the remaining students survive and redeem herself truly if she’s dead.

Kyoko Kirigiri

♡ Bad bitch energy, calm and collected when I could never be.

✘ Especially in future arc of the anime, damn can you show some emotion please? Through your words and expressions not just your actions. Sure she was willing to “die” for Makoto but like I just want more emotion from her sometimes, even in THH.

Makoto Naegi

♡ So pure. I Love Bryce Papenbrook. Makoto reminds me of Sora and I love his design.

✘ In THH I didn’t mind his innocence but in the Danganronpa 3 future arc anime, when people started straight up abusing him and accusing him, he needed to grow a little backbone.

Byakuya Togami

♡ Love my dad, king shit, also love how over the progression of the games and animes he becomes a little more kind to his friends.

✘ Why the fuck did he mess with Chihiro’s body? Just so cruel and disrespectful.

Yasuhiro Hagakure

♡ Funny magic man. Sexy voice.

✘ Please. Please Hiro use your brain just once. Why do we have to prove Kyoko isn’t a ghost?!

Toko Fukawa

♡ Character development in UDG and I love Genocider.

✘ Putting down herself and others constantly gets old in THH.

Aoi Asahina

♡ Love her voice actress and her personality

✘ We really just gonna get everyone killed in chapter 4 huh? Surely you know they don’t all deserve that.

Junko Enoshima

♡ A very memorable villain with great hair and design.

✘ I just can’t stand her. I hate her so much.

Mukuro Ikusaba

♡ Her mercenary background is super cool as a concept.

✘ Too bad it wasn’t explored nearly enough.

Hajime Hinata

♡ Seeing the protagonist be a little less naive, innocent and positive than Makoto was a refreshing change, although I loved Makoto. I liked Hajime’s cynicism and expressions that sometimes just screamed “this shit again, huh?”

✘ I enjoy the way Izuru looks but I hate him as a character. He is sexy to look at but Hajime is just a better character overall

Teruteru Hanamura

♡ His love for his family and mother especially is so cute and heart breaking if you know the full story.

✘ He needs to know when to dial it back and quit with the perversions. And no it’s not just how he looks, Miu needs to chill at times, too.

Twogami

♡ I feel like he genuinely cares about his friends, just hides it well

✘ His death felt like a cop out and poorly written. It just didn’t sit right with me. Also his design is disgusting to me, his outfit and such.

Mahiru Koizumi

♡ Loyal to her close friends.

✘ I just have no interest in her as a character and I find her boring.

Peko Pekoyama

♡ Loyalty. Loyalty is something I value very highly in every form of relationship. Peko is also very hot.

✘ Come on girl... I know how you were raised but you should’ve known Fuyuhiko didn’t think of you as just a tool and you two should’ve expressed your true feelings long ago. Like even in secret. How do you live like this? Also I feel like killing Mahiru could’ve been avoided with a calm talk.

Ibuki Mioda

♡ Cute design, positive vibes.

✘ Cringe sometimes in the way she talks.

Hiyoko Saionji

♡ Beautiful character design and some very good insults and snarky remarks at times.

✘ Just irredeemably mean and annoying. Even when you do her free time events she is just so annoying.

Mikan Tsumiki

♡ I like her design as well as her hair, expressions, sprites and clothing.

✘ I hate her. I just hate her whether she’s in her true psycho form or timid stuttering form. She’s just annoying in my opinion.

Nekomaru Nidai

♡ So supportive, can hold my drink at a party. Respects everyone and wants the best for them.

✘ Bro Mechamaru was a stupid plot point. I just couldn’t stand looking at him and couldn’t take it seriously. Still sad when he died though.

Chiaki Nanami

♡ From chapter 5 of sdr2 on she is impossible not to love if you didn’t already. Just the selflessness, the sadness of the reveal and execution, how she returns to help Hajime at the end???? I love her. I love her hair design, color palette, her personality, everything.

✘ I’m bitter and miserable about her being the only class member to actually die (the despair arc anime) also her falling asleep at random times is kind of odd and she doesn’t seem to be like that later on in the game??? Like it seemed like a cheap joke but not actually who she is? Hard for me to explain.

Gundham Tanaka

♡ King shit, couldn’t praise him enough. He’s sexy, loves animals, and is funny as hell sometimes. His voice actor is a saint and a cool dude and I named my guinea pigs after the Dark Devas (yes I know they are hamsters in the games.)

✘ Come on dude. I get that being from Hell and magic and having evil powers is your shtick, but we all know that you and Nekomaru sacrificed yourselves so the others wouldn’t starve. We know you care about your classmates. There comes a time when it’s time to let personas and facades fade and be true to your heart. I just feel like him denying he cared at the end hurt. We all know he cared. I didn’t like how he was haughty until the end. He deserved better. I love him.

Nagito Komaeda

♡ I love him so much. So cunning and intelligent, always a step ahead. And he’s big sexy.

✘ Him killing himself in chapter 5 hurt me so bad I was like in denial for days. Also hate how Bryce Papenbrook gives him a raspy stoner psycho voice in the game then a light airy higher-pitched voice in the despair arc anime. It just bothers me. I love his voice still but the inconsistency just hurts my OCD

Sonia Nevermind

♡ I love that she’s so interested in her passions and love her feelings for Gundham

✘ Her outfit and bow are atrocious. Also why didn’t she start liking and talking to Gundham sooner on? Their romance bloomed late and it would’ve made for a better chapter 4 ending if they were a bit closer.

Kazuichi Souda

♡ Cool design and outfit, love his voice (also voices Kaito in V3) and his backstory is relatable at times. He’s also very human in that he’s scared a lot of the time or insecure or blames others in panicked situations. It’s not always a good thing but it’s human and realistic.

✘ Gosh he can be so annoying. Sometimes flirting or whining too much is well... too much.

Akane Owari

♡ Strong-willed and definitely someone I would be friends with

✘ What the hell is her outfit? Gymnasts and athletes don’t wear that shit. Stop objectifying her when it doesn’t even make the product or plot better. Like there’s absolutely no point to making her dress that way. I was a gymnast for 15 years. Even those who do parkour (which Akane seems to do more often than actual gymnastics in the anime and game) don’t wear what she wears. Also she’s underrated.

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryuu

♡ I love him. He’s the DR character I’m most like out of all the games and anime. Tenko is a close second. I think he’s adorable, love his character arc, development, redemption, and love his voice.

✘ In the anime/despair arc, Fuyuhiko is not done justice. He doesn’t get enough lines, has a different voice actor, just doesn’t give off the same vibes.

Izuru Kamakura

♡ Sexy man long hair good.

✘ Boring character. I wish he were just Hajime.

Kaede Akamatsu

♡ Loyalty and leadership are such attractive qualities in her. Also she faced her death with such class and dignity and I respect her because I could never.

✘ Some of the voice lines Erika does for her are just weird and cringe. Just random moans or grunts... I don’t know it’s like when Ann Takamaki from Persona 5 (also voiced by Erika) makes suggestive noises as well. Just grinds my gears. Also hate her outfit down to the hair pins.

Shuichi Saihara

♡ I love his nasally voice. I love his design and he’s so adorable. I love how emotional and compassionate he can be. He ties with Makoto for favorite protag of mine.

✘ That sprite where he sniffs his hand. And his ugly ass hat.

Rantarou Amami

♡ Sexy man, sexy voice, sexy piercings

✘ Ugly outfit, and wasted potential

Ryoma Hoshi

♡ I respect him and feel bad for his outlook on life and for how poorly he views himself. I love his little hat as well and he’s the first “different styled” character (Hifumi, Bandai, Teruteru) that I liked the design of.

✘ I hate when he says “got a long ways to go,” it’s overused and annoying, and wish he gave himself more credit. Also hate that when you first meet him he warns you that he’s killed people and is dangerous to be around. Come on buddy, you know you wouldn’t hurt your friends. Stop pushing them away.

Kirumi Tojo

♡ Competence, well rounded, skillful

✘ Boring as hell. I wouldn’t waste one free time event on her.

Angie Yonaga

♡ Dark skin, super cute, love her talent as an artist myself.

✘ Gives religious people a bad name and is super manipulative which I hate.

Tenko Chabashira

♡ I relate to her and feel bad when she’s misunderstood. She’s a good person deep down. Also love her sprites.

✘ There’s more cunning, funny and clever ways to write her digs at men.

Korekiyo Shunguuji

♡ I’m in love with this man. Long hair, voice, mystery, mask, intelligence, passion, talent.

✘ He definitely was a victim of abuse and a lot of people refuse to see that and just hate him. Team Danganronpa should’ve given him a redemption arc where he realized his sister abused him and changed.

Gonta Gokuhara

♡ I love his design except for his suit. Also he’s so cute and naive. I cried for his trail.

✘ No need talk like caveman. Better way to do this.

Kokichi Ouma

♡ Like Nagito, I value his intelligence and crazy cunning.

✘ Shouldn't have died. Also shouldn’t have manipulated Gonta. That was just cruel.

Miu Iruma

♡ She has her hilarious moments and her death surprised me and was sad.

✘ Sometimes she lacks basic empathy, i.e. calling Tenko “Tencrotch” when she just fucking died.

Maki Harukawa

♡ Amazing character development. Didn’t see her surviving until the end at the start. Also her love and passion for Kaito.

✘ “Do you wanna die?” gets old.

Kaito Momota

♡ Just the overall best bro you could ever have.

✘ Has some toxic masculinity issues and anger issues.

K1-B0

♡ Pretty much everything about him. His design, his attitude and personality, especially how amazing and cool he is chapter 5 onward, his execution made me so sad. He’s so innocent and funny without trying.

✘ When you do his free time events he’s very arrogant and just talks about himself a lot... it seems odd and not similar to the Kiibo we see throughout the game.

Himiko Yumeno

♡ Super cute design, love her voice and “Nyeh...” and her sprites. Her character development is great as well.

✘ Why did they take so long to make her important and likable?

Tsumugi Shirogane

♡ An excellent and well hidden reveal

✘ I hate her. So annoying, from the voice to the references and her personality.

[whatthehelliswrongwithme]

Voltron Part 38

Yes, the season 7 wrap-up gets to be it’s own post. Why? Because I said so. Fuck you.

(If y'all expect a literary analysis: Please don't. I just want to share my dumb thoughts)

Honestly. I expected worse

It may just be, because I was warned of the last two seasons so many times. But it wasn’t that bad. Still liked it more then season 4

[It *was* a mediocre season right after a really good season. So maybe the general dislike came from that?]

The episodes at the beginning were the better ones. I’m not really a huge fan of this “Keeping up with the Garrison”-thing

I don’t think that the battles are interesting. I’m here for the characters. So the last battle just was dragging on and on and on...

This season also really liked killing off characters and fake-deaths

And it kinda felt like they reused a lot of the animated shots

Also it kept on introducing new character to which I have no attachment to (Looking at you, 4-eyes and Random ass children)

4-eyes.... Yeeeeaah.

They did a “Bury your gays”, I didn’t really recognise his and Shiro’s realationship as romantic and he basically had no screentime. So. Bad Rep. (The goddamn COW had more screentime than he did!)

My favourite episode was “Sheith flashback! Flasback! Honey, Moustache man shrunk the kids! Flashback! Oh yeah, Allura’s there too”

(Also they actively parraleled 4-eyes with Keith. Which is just another huge Sheith thing. Which I very much enjoyed)

Shiro: Look at how they massacred my boy! He's now more of a mentor-role than one of the core-members. Kinda like moustache man. And I think that’s pretty stupid. I liked him more as a Paladin (Why did he leave the Black Lion? We’ll never know) (The answer’s, Bad Writing)

Keith has kinda grown into his leadership role? It was nice to see him being soft with characters other than Shiro. But it’s weird that he kept on making references to the Red Lion. 

Lance is the Sharpshooter.

But also he had his whole “homesick”-thing since the very first season. And it kinda felt like he should have been the main-focus, when they returned to earth

Hunk finally got the screentime he deserves! He had some angst, some heroic moments... Good for my boy!

Pidge fucking finally got her whole family back. Which I guess is really the end of her arc then... Gurl, you gotta get a new motivation for the last season.

Allura. I’ve got nothing to say really. The season focused on “returning to earth” and she really has no association with that.

Moustache man is honestly still one of my faves. He just want’s to be a Dad to Allura. And I respect that

(He's a single dad, who works two jobs. Who loves his kids and never stops. With gentle hands and the heart of a fighter. He's a survivor)

Sailor Moon and space wolf were just completly forgotten about in the last couple episodes. But I like them. Maybe next season, they'll get more screentime

Krolia’s gone, but at the very end, she was there again? If she’s still in S8, why did they make her temporarely leave?

Klance had some moments. If you squint really, really hard...

Sheith. Aaaah yes, my favourite. Not as many moments as I hoped for but still pretty significant ones

Coming out of the right corner is Shallura! What an unexpected return! With such moments as “being worried space parents together” and “gifting a really fucking ugly arm” !

Allurance kinda seems inevitable now. It’s obviously the ship the show pushes the most. (And it’s straight, so thats a huge factor). I think it’s cute, but if it does become canon it better fucking be not as one-sided as before!

Plance! Plance! PLANCE! Gosh, I live for Plance. They’re just so cute together!

Adashi? Why does this exist? We literally know nothing about 4-eyes?

But, whatever makes you happy (And I’m really sorry for you)

Romura is really fucking cute. And even though it has basically no scenes, it's still somehow one of my favourite ships

Shidge. (I’ve got nothing to say. I just want to make a joke.) Shidge-shipper’s ideal realationship-dynamic is that picture of a small hamster trying to eat a banana

Hunelle came out of nowhere, and I kinda dig it...

Predictions for the last season:

They gotta solve the space witch-problem (After she was literally only in the gameshow episode)

They’ll probably still want us to care about the Random ass children somehow

Give me Furry back. I don’t care how they do it, just make it happen. She deserved better then to be killed off by Lotor

I demand more cute slice of life-episodes!

And either an anime-trope Beach-episode. Or an american cartoon-trope Bodyswitch/ Shopping-episode

It’s probably just gonna end in another big robot battle in which I have no interest in. Won’t it?

Remember when these post were really short? Yeah, me neither.... Only one season left! Once agagin, I just wanna thank everybody for putting up with my bullshit, that are these posts. Glad some of you think I’m funny! And thanks to everyone commenting, liking and reblogging! (Especially the comments explaining some background-infos are nice) Love you all❤!!!

[facepalming-since-chernobyl]

Dead Karamel Fics Club

So, I was talking with a @raisedbyfandomwolves about the karamel fics ideas we are never going to write and I’m going to kill you with one of my ideas.

The title: DEAD TO THE WORLD

Theme song:

Deathwish without a prayer

End of hope

End of love

End of time

The rest is silence 

*evil laugh*

It starts sometime after s3. Mon-El for a few years is in the future and exploring with his Legion friend Sal the ruins of National City (most of the humanity lives in the flying cities, because the future, bitches!, and most of the earth is destroyed).

Suddenly Sal calls him, because he finds intact newspaper. Mon grabs it but it turns to dust, but before he manages to make a hologram of the first page with his ring.

The article written by James Olsen is about Supergirl’s heroic death.

In their Legion headquarters he, Sal and Brainiac are talking about the article. Mon notices some of the facts in the article are different than in the past he remembers, also Kara should not be dead on that moment aka someone is screwing the timeline.

He demands (aka showing Brainiac into the wall and threatening to murder him with cold blood) to be sent into the past. Sal agrees to come with him.

The problem is, the device Brainiac offers is not good – it can bring you back once and then goes poof!. Also, they can’t take anything with them aka they end naked *Terminator’s theme in the background*. So, no legion rings. Also, they may or may not turn into a cloud made of molecules.

Mon of course doesn’t give a fuck but promises he won’t contact Kara or superfriends to not fuck the timeline more. Because they can’t take anything with them, Brainiac tattoos how to make the device on Mon’s back.

Before they are sent, they drink some rum and holds hands and byeeee, Brainiac Mon and Sal to the past.

What happens?

A lot can happen in 5 seconds.

In the first second, you can open your eyes and see darkness. You can realize you are levitating in air. You can also realize you are completely naked. In the second, you can fall down. In third, you can make a hole in the roof of a henhouse and be a cause of a collective heart attack of 20 poor chickens. In the fourth you can throw up the aldebaran rum you so unwisely drunk before Brainy sent your ass back into the past. In the fifth you can moan the one and only fitting word:

“Fuck.”

There is no Sal in the sight. Did he turn into a dust? Stay tuned!

Because I have amazing sense of humor, Mon is found by an old lady who is the owner of the henhouse. She aims a shotgun at him, while he, covers himself with a chicken and explains himself.

Because the lady is bored and she doesn’t see hot naked guys, she clothes him, feeds him and borrows some money for the bus to NC. In exchange, he fix some shit in her house.

In NC Kara is in her depressed mood that becomes worse, because sometimes she hears Mon’s hearbeat *sad violin music*

Mon is proceeding with his investigation but sometimes can’t help himself and watches her from some afar. So yeah, she really hears his hearbeat. Oh the ANGST.

He contacts… Lobotomizer (when I was developing this story I still didn’t mind her….). He explains her everything, shows her his mighty naked back and she promises making the device.

Then he is caught by *the drums* yes, you guessed right! Sal his pal, who is a Dxamite who survived the invasion (all his other friends-soldiers breathed too many lead and died) but was sucked by the same portal as Mon.

He is also *more drums* the guard who saved Mon on Daxam and yes! He wants revenge! Cold ass revenge! Because he blames Mon for his bro death, his chomik death (hamster on Daxam, Sal calls his Bob), his blah blah *villains bullshit* and will kill and destroy everything Mon’s love. Aka Kara :)

Mon somehow escapes the cage and runs to Kara who sees him for the first time, smiles and… ends dead, stabbed by a kryptonite blade. She dies in Mon’s arms and he blames himself, because I’m a cold bitch without a heart.

He thinks it’s all his fault and goes to Lena who gives him the time travel device. Instead of the future he goes to the past, to Daxam, the morning it is destroyed. He kills himself, because I’m super duper ass cold bitch. His guard tries to save him, but before he kills the Kryptonian, Mon-El stops him and allows the shocked ambassador to escape. Maybe, the guard accidentally shots him. Mon holds the face of his guard in his palms, says it’s the only way and embraces. And then kaboooom, all die.

Kara wakes up in the present, woken up by another nightmare, when she sees a strange random Daxamite guy who looks a little familiar but she can’t recall him.

Then Sal, who was sleeping beside her, because I’m a cruel horrible human being, wakes up, asks if it was a nightmare and they cuddle and come back to sleep, but Kara is still weirded out.

There is an implication Sal remembers the other timeline and everything what has happened.

THE END

Joking, I was thinking about part two, where Sal tries to prevent Kara from restoring her memories and shit happens, but because the power of love!, she does and then tries to save Mon-El. Not necessarily she would succeed because I really wanted to make this story horrible :P

Soooo, karamel fic writers! Do you have abandoned fic ideas? Care to share?!

Also, @raisedbyfandomwolves I’m challenging you to share your idea. MUHAHAAHH!

[idnek83]

Master List of Ramblings

✨A list of all my Danganronpa ramblings so far✨

*Added some Soul Friends stuff, still mostly Soudam

**This isn’t in any real order for the most part. Adding new stuff to the bottom of their respective lists though

SFW Stuff

Soudam

Sonia tricking Gundham into confessing to Soda

Ibuki giving Soda piercings

Beach vacation

Soda loves bad music, Gundham loves his husband

Soda is a third wheel and everyone is his wingman

Soda watching baby hamsters and one of them doesn’t make it (CW: animal death)

Dealing with Soda’s motion sickness

Gundham hiding animals in their house

Soda’s ringtone for Gundham

Gundham has cowboy energy

Soda and Gundham being terrible at seeking medical attention

Soda being insecure about his natural look

Soda fixing Gundham’s earring

Gundham helping Soda get his first pet

Gundham helping Soda adopt a dog that’s far away

Soda trying to get over his fear of cats at a cat cafe

Soudam wedding (very long btw)

Soda and Mahiru being friends

Short Soda

Pokemon AU

Soda not dyeing his roots

Tipsy soft soudam

Soda speech impediment

Fluffy headcanons

Them both being terrible at being sick

Soda sewing things for his friends

Soda plays with the dogs

Aquarium/Zoo first date

Halloween and Soda is a coward

Sharing eyeliner

Soudam being clingy

Soda finding a stray kitten in his garage

Soda and Akane workout buddies, Gundham’s jealous

Soda’s garage covered in pics of Gundham

Gundham learning how to braid

Soda leaving for a long internship

Soda telling Gundham about the chalk line thing

Sharing Pjs

Apartment hunting

Cuddling and playing with each other’s hair

Soda is the only one who is allowed to touch Gundham’s earring

Soda and Gundham sharing nail polish

Soda stealing Gundham’s shirts

Trans Soda thoughts- Part 1 (Trans Soda)

Soda thinks a fox sounds like Gundham

Soda’s “”good”” with yoyo’s

Gundham sets the stove on fire

Soda’s hair dye getting messed up

Soda overdressed for their first date

Soda loves space and the stars

Star gazing date

Gundham waking up after top surgery (Trans Gundham)

Soda and Gundham binder ~aesthetic~ fight (Trans Soda)(Trans Gundham)

Soda trying to sleep at Gundham’s but his snakes are shedding LOUDLY

Gundham’s morning voice

Strawberry picking “date”

Soda being jealous of Gundham’s motorcycle

Trans Soda thoughts – Part 2 (Trans Soda)

Soda makes trans jokes all the time but no one realises he’s trans (Trans Soda)

Naga Gundham

Helping each other take testosterone (Trans Soda)(Trans Gundham)

Sooped-up roomba

Soda is fidgeting, Gundham lets him play with his hand/rings

Just chilling on the couch

Soda being nervous about their first time (sfw)

Overworked Gundham

Asexual Soda thinking Gundham is proposition him

Soda and Gundham’s weird house and Halloween

Trans Soda and Mondo being bros

Trans Soda and Mondo fighting about binders

Thoughts on Soda and Gundham cuddling

Soda and Gundham don’t want kids but assume the other one does (followup)

Tender Drunk Soudam 1

Tender Drunk Soudam 2

Soda crushes a watermelon with his thighs (sfw but suggestive)

Disney Binge

Gundham comes out as trans and Soda gets him a gift (Trans Gundham)

Gundham dealing with Soda being clingy

Soda buys Gundham a ““Vampire”” Candle

Soda’s advanced gender

Dad Bouncer AU

Dad bouncer – Part 1

Dad bouncer – Part 2

Dad bouncer – Part 3

Gundham proposing

Soul Friends

Childhood friends to lovers au

 NSFW

Soudam

Spicy soudam headcanons

Soda builds a fuck machine (Trans soda)(afab language)

Soda BJ master

Semi-public sex

Making a sex tape for a long business trip

Soda with a clit piercing (Trans Soda)(afab language)

Soda realizing Gundham’s pets are watching them bang

Gundham + Soda + Hajime threesome thoughts

Breath play

Body worship (Trans Soda)(Trans Gundham)(afab language for Soda)

Soda is unhinged and building things with vibrator motors (not really nsfw but uuhh themes lol)

Gundham watches Soda get off to his voice

Soda finds Gundham’s earring and Gundham rewards him

Soda being attractive and not realizing it

Soda eating vanilla ice cream “innocently”

Soda sending Gundham “interesting” photos

Soda gets a hip tattoo

Car sex (Trans Gundham)

Soda thick thighs booty shorts

Going to a party and getting worked up from Soda sitting in Gundham’s lap in the car (Trans Soda)(afab language)

Gundham with a Jacob’s ladder piercing

Pool sex (Trans Soda)(afab language)

Soda doesn’t understand edible lingerie

Soda wears a collar and leash

Soda likes having his hair pulled

Gundham wearing lingerie

Matching tattoos

Soda wears a vibrator in public while Gundham controls it

Gundham breeding kink

More breeding kink

Soda loves vibrators (Trans Soda)

Soda giving Gundham a lap dance (Trans Soda)

Soda biting his lip cus he’s stupid

Sleepy morning sex (Trans Soda)(afab language)

Soda getting caught jacking off to Gundham (Trans Soda)(afab language)

Soda getting caught follow up (Trans Soda)(afab language)

Virgin Gundham and experienced Soda (Trans Soda)

Soudam Fear Kink (Remnants of Despair)

Soul Friends

Body Swap AU

(Some parts aren’t really nsfw but overall the AU is so its all here)

Body Swap - Part 1 (Trans Soda)

Body Swap - Part 2 (Trans Soda)

Body Swap - Part 3 (Trans Soda)

Body Swap - Part 4 (Trans Soda)

Body Swap - Part 5 (Trans Soda)

Body Swap - Part 6 (Trans Soda)

[thanksjro]

Dark Cybertron Chapter 7: Simon Furman and His Lack of a Relationship with the Singular They

The Lost Light is still being attacked by Ammonites, like it has been for the last few issues. Hound’s taken over as acting field commander and is calling all the shots. Chromedome uses his stupid beefy arms to punch things. Trailcutter is screaming. Swerve’s got his My First Blaster™ strapped to the top of his alt, and saves Crosscut.

Crosscut is our toy tie-in character for this issue. He’s a senator, and drafts play scripts. Arguably one of the more interesting tie-in guys, at least in theory. In practice, all he’s doing is forgetting Swerve’s name, which isn’t going to help the guy with his through-the-floor self esteem.

Crosscut points out that Swerve’s communicator is flashing, and while he’s checking his voicemail, all the Ammonites seemingly vanish… at least, until the gang realizes that they’re instead heading for Metroplex.

Inside, it would appear that the Rod Pod Squad aren’t actually dead, though their ride is probably toast. Before everything went to hell, a wall slammed down from the ceiling, protecting everyone from being utterly destroyed. Skids has figured out what all the arrow graffiti is about, earning himself a BOMP from Getaway. Looks like the internal structure of Metroplex has been shifting, and that’s why they got the runaround last issue. Also, Whirl’s gone missing, but we don’t have time to worry about that, because Swerve just called back with some bad news: the admium flakes they saw earlier mean that Metroplex has an alchemical virus.

Don’t you look at me like that, I’m getting to the explanation.

Alchemical viruses turn the metal of the body into admium, a rare, incredibly soft metal that will break down very easily and also kill you. It’s pretty bad to have. Also, contagious. Fellas better get outta there, posthaste.

The Ammonites are also storming Metroplex, so that’s an additional issue. God, it just never stops, does it?

Over in the Dead Universe-

Is

Is that a fortress of evil in the shape of Nova Prime’s head?

Is that a goddamned fortress-

Anyway, the center of Nova Prime’s universe is Kup, who was the guy who got oh-so-dramatically revealed at the end of the last issue. Unfortunately, Orion Pax also considers Kup to be very near and dear to his heart, and the whole “being turned into a space bridge” thing is going to be an issue.

This is the weirdest love triangle I’ve ever seen.

How the hell did Kup even get here? Well, in order to know that, you’ve have to had read Infestation, the bullshit zombie crossover comic miniseries that ran in 2011.

But I’m not going to do that.

Because I don’t want to.

After a bit of showboating, Nova Prime orders Nightbeat to take Team -Imus to their cell.

Over on Cybertron, Shockwave is getting real sick of Galvatron’s shit, but Galvatron is too busy posing dramatically to notice. Waspinator, Metalhawk, and Dreadwing float in the air. I’m not sure what they’re up to, but I’m sure it’s important. Jhiaxus shows up with a gaggle of goons, one of which seems to have forgotten his face in the jar by the door.

Galvatron gets shamed for tearing Megatron in half, since that sort of broke the space bridge in his torso, but he’s too busy being classist to care. Waspinator floats in the background. What are you doing back there, pal?

Shockwave orders Waspinator to carry Megatron to his quarters, but Galvatron’s decided that he’s going to be an asshole about everything today, even when he’s being helpful.

…Okay, Boomer.

Waspinator still ends up hauling Megatron’s ass away, and Shockwave and Jhiaxus have a little chat.

Back in the dead universe, Team -Imus are in their cell, as Nightbeat double-checks the locks or some shit, I dunno. They’re gonna get their sparks ripped out later in the day, so that the space bridge Kup’s got running in his torso finally has enough juice to actually friggin’ work.

Then Rodimus flashes his mystery hand at Nightbeat and makes him fall down. In order for the whole brainwashing thing to work, Nightbeat’s true nature had to be suppressed; however, whenever Rodimus shows off his mystery hand, it makes his brain kickstart back on, messing up the brainwashing.

Well, you know what, Cyclonus? That’s not my fucking fault. Blame Roberts and Barber. I certainly do.

ORION PLEASE.

We finally get a look at what Rodimus’ hand mystery is, and if you read Eugenesis, you might know where this is going. It would seem Nightbeat has not- which is for the best, really, given what happens to him in it- but he’s still a pretty smart cookie and can suss it out through the power of deductive reasoning. Here’s what he’s working with:

After a moment’s deliberation, he asks Rodimus, who he knows to be the captain of a ship, how many folks are riding around in the space yacht. Rodimus tells him 190, and shows off that he’s got his lipgloss on, and it would seem that Nightbeat’s a free man again. He lets everyone out of the cell, and they gear up to go pick up Kup. Orion Pax is confused as to what the hell just happened here, and Rodimus promises to explain why he’s carved a division problem into his palm once they aren’t in immediate danger.

Back on Cybertron, Galvatron and Waspinator are dragging Megatron’s halves towards Shockwave’s quarters, when Bumblebee pops out of nowhere with a gun and a mouth full of swears. He’s here for Megatron, and he’s not taking “no” for an answer. Galvatron thinks that this is super fucking funny, and tosses Megatron like an empty soda can into the wall so he can squash a bug.

It looks pretty grim for ol’ Bumblebee, but suddenly Galvatron realizes he left the oven on that Megatron’s gone missing.

Oh, there he is!

Megatron blasts Galvatron in the torso, then- in a surprisingly polite manner, at least for him- tells Bumblebee to grab his legs so they can get out of here. As the two of them traverse the burned-out husk that is Cybertron, Megatron decides to be a complete bastard, as he smiles at the idea of Starscream suffering. Like, dude, I know he kept you in weird hamster ball jail and spouted soliloquies in your general direction every single day you were there, but folks are dying right now.

Speaking of Starscream, he’s having a moment, as he sits on his knees and stares at the sky in abject horror while the world burns around him. Scoop comes by to yell at him for being a harbinger of death, and generally being a less than stellar leader, and Starscream halfway calls himself a dumpster fire.

Back inside Metroplex, the Rod Pod Squad are fortifying their defenses against the Ammonites, even though they really need to be getting the hell out of there before they get turned into talcum powder through the power of alchemy. Whirl shows back up, the Ammonite hanger-on in his grasp, and we get the skinny on why the hell the Ammonites are involved with this whole debacle anyway.

The answer is Shockwave.

The answer is always Shockwave.

Then the little dude explodes. It’s fine, they do that sometimes.

Before he went kablooey, little dude uttered the phrase, “if the dead are not enough.” We’ll get to what all that’s about later. Right now there are far more important things going on.

LIKE MOTHERFUCKING LADY ROBOTS.

But why is this such a big deal? Why is it that non-male coded robots who aren’t Arcee haven’t been seen up until this point? What’s up with that, huh?

Well, in order to understand IDW’s complicated relationship with gender, we’re going to have to do some digging into the history of Transformers as a franchise.

We’re going to have to talk about Simon Furman.

We're going to have to talk about Prime's Rib.

And we’re going to have to talk about Spotlight: Arcee.

Simon Furman wrote a lot of Transformers. You cannot get away from Simon Furman, because the man is so ingrained in the franchise. He was there for Marvel UK, he was there for the back half of Marvel US, he wrote for several other publication runs of Transformers, he worked on the Earth Wars mobile game-

-and, of course, IDW publishing.

Because Furman is so very well established and known in the industry, he gets the benefit of not being questioned on a lot of the calls he makes.

Which is a problem, because the man is a massive misogynist.

In 1989, Marvel UK #234 came out, containing the story entitled “Prime’s Rib!” in which the Autobots built Arcee in order to appease a group of strawmen feminists. Of course, one female Transformer isn’t enough for them, and they yell at poor Optimus Prime for trying his best. This is the point where Hot Rod is used as a writer avatar to try to smooth things over with the reader, because you see, the Transformers don’t even know what sexual dimorphism and gender identity even is, so of course they wouldn’t have female members of their race! Jazz is used for a breast joke. Arcee acts like a massive, stereotypical bitch the whole time, despite not having been written like that at all in the other issues. It’s a bad comic with hideous ideology leaking out of it, and I'm halfway sorry I read it, so I’ll just give you the essence of this nightmare.

Oh, those big, mean, scary feminists are bullying the robots for living their lives, huh Furman? Life is just so goddamned unfair when a woman exists in your fucking line of sight.

Furman has gone on record saying that he doesn’t see the point in including the concept of gender in a race of non-sexually reproducing robots. He sees them as “genderless.” Which, if that statement existed in a vacuum, I could perhaps see where he’s coming from.

But Simon Furman does not exist in a vacuum. He exists in a world where sexism exists, something that he’s willingly participated in.

Let me back up that little tidbit with a bit of a disclaimer: I’m not in any way an expert on gender. I didn’t study it in school, I’ve not read an obscene amount of pieces on the topic. I’m not even sure about it on a personal level.

Maybe some of y’all have noticed the whole other set of pronouns I slapped into the bio in the last month or so. It doesn’t really matter, 90% of people don’t read the FAQ/About, I know that, and then 95% of those people only read it once, and this has been a relatively new self-revelation.

BUT ANYWAY.

Let’s be… fair about this. 1989 was a while ago, a lot of research on the concept of gender has taken place, maybe he’s ch-

Oh, what’s that?

Misogyny?

Transphobia?

Transmisogyny?

Treating women as an aberration being forced on Transformers as a whole?

And the writing is clunky and overstuffed?

Well, that’s just fucking fantastic, Furman, thanks so much.

This was in 2008. Because Furman established that female Transformers weren’t something natural, but rather made, and forcibly at that, and nobody fucking smacked his little hands away from this terrible idea, AND nobody tried to fix it for years, there was a lack of gender diversity within IDW until 2014, with the release of Dark Cybertron Chapter 7. Because we waited six years to fix this nightmare, things couldn’t be done quite the way that Roberts had been hoping, in that he intended for our female robots to not have the whole… fembot build happening. IDW wanted them immediately clockable, because this was very clearly a problem that needed rectifying.

So, in short: because of boys’ club mentality and a lack of understanding of what gender means or why it’s important for roughly 50% of the world’s population to have representation in media, Nautica and Chromia are here now.

And despite the convoluted road they had to take, I love them very much.

[connorspiracy]

Don’t Let The Street Bugs Bite || Connor & Shiloh

Timing: Current Location: Downtown Parties: @connorspiracy & @evanescentform Content: Bug monsters, insects, their skittery little legs Summary: There’s cracks in the ground with insect monsters in them. That sucks. 

Strangeness in White Crest was par for the course, so much so that the absence of strangeness would in itself be strange. Connor kept his proverbial ear to the ground, always on the message boards looking for news, rumours, or anything that might prompt him to investigate. December had itself on overboard already and they weren’t even a week in. He’d heard of cracks opening up around main street and strange insects appearing. Connor had brought bug spray and thick clothing, but he didn’t know how much that would help matters. Rio wasn’t able to film right now, thanks to the recent werewolf attack and hospitalisation, so he was alone, narrating to the camera and switching between shots of himself and the cracks. “Hey,” he called, waving at a nearby jogger with a friendly smile. “Do you wanna do a vox pop?” 

Early morning was the best time to go for a jog given recent events. Lately Shiloh has been a bundle of nerves anytime she’s in public. She hardly wanted to revert to a hermit so she would more or less take control of that and go out for a short amount of time and then come home. This time she would spend the outing on a jog. She hadn’t done much exercise since she came home and she knew that had a toll on her mental well-being as well. She hadn’t expected anyone to really speak to her and had to do a double take when she noticed someone waving at her. She slowed to a stop, pulling her earbud out. “What was that?” She wasn’t sure she heard him right. In the case she did, “I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.” She did notice the camera however and she hardly wanted to be on camera at the moment but maybe it would be something quick. She didn’t want to be rude after all.

Connor didn't let himself get embarrassed by filming. Yeah, people would look at him weird when he was out there talking to his camera, but he just figured that was their problem. He did get a little embarrassed when he had to approach people though. He'd wanted to head out early so there'd be fewer distractions for the video, but that also meant fewer people to talk to. "Oh, bugger, you were wearing earbuds. I didn't mean to bother you," he said with a polite chuckle. "A vox pop is like... the opinion of the public. Like when you see Joe from Sweansea being asked what he thinks about the club's new mascot on the news." He'd put the camera down for the moment, not wanting to film her unless she agreed. "I'm making a video about the cracks. Have you heard anything about 'em?" He gestured to the strange space in the ground where the road should have been connected. 

As he explained what a vox pop was, Shiloh wondered what he could be asking for. Then she turned to look down at the cracks. Come to think of it, she had seen them around town. She just assumed they were normal cracks but… anything in this town was far from normal. “Uh, I - I dunno. I think maybe an underground tree root sprouting out or… or just long overdue maintenance on the streets.” She chuckled, hoping he would find her normal reasonings satisfactory. She pulled out her other earbuds and put them away, giving him her attention. She looked down at the cracks once more, wondering what could have caused it. The way it kind of jutted out made it seem like it was something underground and god knows what might be underneath the city. “What do you think it might be?” She asked, curious of his opinion. 

Well, that answer was pretty boring. Connor scrunched his nose, a little disappointed. He wanted to get out here and film something, and this jogger was trying to convince him it was some kind of tree with its roots under the ground. “It’s happening in places where there aren’t any trees around. And people have reported… things coming out of them.” Connor leaned down a little, holding up his camera again to see if he could see anything down there. “White Crest. Pretty much the only explanation anyone needs, isn’t it?” he said with a low chuckle, narrowing his gaze. He was sure he saw something move down there. “Do you see something in there?” 

At his rebuttal, Shiloh just looked away and half-listened. She wasn’t sure who he was trying to convince - Shiloh preferred not to let just anyone know she believed in anything other than the normal right off the bat. “Honestly, White Crest nonsense is the reason for just about anything that happens here.” However, she hoped that wasn’t caught on camera considering it seemed a rather harsh thing to say about things like the many deaths and kidnappings that happened within town lines. As he called for her attention she leaned forward, wanting to see if she did catch anything inside the cracks. She didn’t seem to see anything in there. Seeing a piece of upturned gravel, Shiloh kicked it, sending it toward the crack, seeing if that would show that nothing was really down there. In retrospect, it was a completely stupid idea to poke the unknown and she should have known that. The cracks grew bigger and she saw something poke out of the ground. Was that--? Spider leg? She backed up, motioning Connor to do the same until whatever it was emerged.

"Glad you understand," Connor said, only half-joking as she returned his words about 'White Crest Nonsense'. He looked over at her with a small smile, testing the waters. You couldn't exactly blame the Cresters for being so bloody serious, but sometimes they were sooo bloody serious. He watched as she kicked some gravel into the hole. This time, he did have the camera rolling, strapped on a chest holder to leave his hands free. "What the fu--" He scrambled backwards as the long, hairy leg made its way out of the hole, followed by the rest of its insectoid body. "ARGH!" He continued to back up, trying not to trip over his own feet. After seeing people's photos and videos online, he'd opted to bring bug spray, and he unleashed it, which only seemed to irk the thing. It made a strange, skittering sound and its mouth clicked. "Stomp on it or something!" 

Shiloh hardly was one to get worked up over a bug but the sheer size of it was more than enough to rattle her. When she saw him spray something in its direction she wondered what it was - either way, it didn’t seem to have any affect on it. Maybe made it a bit angrier. “What was that?” She asked, hoping he got the hint not to use that again. It darted to them which made her back up in reaction. Maybe now was a good time to run. “I didn’t bring my huge spider stomping boots on my run today, sorry.” Shiloh didn’t know how he would even expect her to stomp on it without at least a jump and a spider was much too fast for that. As Shiloh continued walking back her feet got caught on something and she almost tumbled down but caught her footing. Yet, the ground continued to rumble. As she thought about what to do another spider leg shot out of the ground, this time much larger than the one before. “Oh fuck.” She muttered. “C’mon we gotta move out of here!” As she spoke, a larger spider emerged from the ground, kicking up chunks of asphalt.

“Bug spray!” Connor answered, as if that was completely fucking obvious. Ghosts he was completely fine with, but ants the size of hamsters were another matter entirely. He sprayed it continuously until the bottle was empty, then he threw the bottle at it, none of which helped. In fact, it was bringing friends. “Shit, shit, shit, shit--” Connor cursed as he fled from the creatures. “This what you had in mind when you went for a morning run?!” His camera was strapped to his chest in a secure harness, but he still felt it moving and hitting the top of his ribs due to the sheer speed with which he ran. The other creature that had emerged was the size of a small dog, and several more of varying mass skittered behind them. “My car--we can--” He gestured vaguely towards the Jeep Renegade that was parked at the end of the street, scrambling for his keys as they grow closer. 

“I was being sarcastic!” Shiloh explained, although was now really a good time to be arguing with someone? Shiloh could just as easily push him into the spiders and save herself! But she wasn’t going to do that because that’s kind of an awful thing to do. “You want to make a run for the car?” Shiloh asked him because if they were going to run now would be the time to do it. They were gaining on them and Shiloh didn’t want to be spider food. Or any kind of food today. “C’mon then!” She urged as she bolted off in the vague direction he gave. Even if she wasn’t heading for it, she’d still outrun them. She had been running for a few seconds before realizing she should have made sure he was right alongside her. She turned to look for him, hoping he was right behind her.

Connor was way too concerned with getting to the vehicle to come up with any kind of snappy response. The insects of varying shapes and sizes had emerged from the hole and were gaining distance on him. Six legs apparently ran faster than two. Shiloh had already been running before he’d even met her, so Connor supposed she must have been pretty good at it, because she practically left him in the dust. His car keys were pressed into the palm of his hand, and he lifted his arm to unlock it as Shiloh grew closer, only to yelp as a pair of pincers or teeth or whatever these bloody things had clamped itself around his ankle. “OW! Hey! Get off!” He tried to hit at it, but his muscles felt heavy. Something was wrong. “He-hel..” He couldn’t even finish the single syllable. 

Shiloh’s eyes dropped to him - on the floor. Oh no. No, no, no. She darted back towards him without a second thought, her mind immediately knowing she had to help him. Her own concern for her well-being and safety out of her mind. She tried to help him get up but the spider’s grip on him was strong and it seemed like Connor was going limp. “A-are you okay?” She asked knowing it was stupid considering he wasn’t speaking. She looked down at him and they met eyes. Something was wrong. Knowing she wasn’t going to be able to yank him away from the bug without causing further injury to him she set him down. The large one was coming closer and Shiloh wasn’t going to try and fight that one. Clenching her fists, she swung her leg back and then kicked forward into the spider’s abdomen, sending it flying away. The other spider seemed concerned with its fellow spider’s well-being and started to scurry off in the direction it flew. She looked down at Connor who remained unmoving.  “Okay, I’m going to pick you up, alright?” Squatting down, she picked him up (with ease) and continued to head toward the direction of his car.

Connor was fully aware, but he couldn’t move. He couldn’t speak. He was just frozen, completely helpless as the creatures continued to swarm. This was it, he thought. He was going to fucking die, eaten alive by insect monsters. He heard Shiloh asking him a question, but he couldn’t answer it. He simply hoped the movement of his eyes and the desperation in them said that yes, please, please pick him up. She did, and he felt himself being moved at what seemed to be an impossible speed. Thank god she was one of those buff girls. The world faded into the back interior of his jeep as Shiloh hurriedly placed him there, doors slammed, keys turned in the ignition, and Connor felt himself breathe a sigh of relief as they sped away. If he was the cat, curiosity had nearly killed him. 

Shiloh didn’t know where she was going. To the hospital? Was he still breathing? She glanced over before remembering she was driving and should keep her eyes on the road. “I can take you to the hospital, if you’d like. I really don’t know what else to do.” She spoke aloud to him, not expecting a response. “C-Can you grunt or anything? Anything at all to let me know you hear me and you’re okay?” Shiloh asked this time, turning once she was at the light. She looked him over, happy to see he was looking around which meant he was more or less conscious? Shiloh could only hope the hospital might be able to help him in some way. Somehow. Shiloh woke up from her thoughts with a honk from behind her. She looked up and continued driving.

Connor could, in fact, breathe. His eyes and his mouth could barely move, but not well enough to be able to speak. He just closed his eyes so they didn’t get dry and so the movement of the vehicle didn’t make him sick. He let out a sound in response to what Shiloh was saying, a grunt, a grown, a death rattle? He just hoped Shiloh could hear whatever it was over the sound of the road. He didn’t know where she was taking him, but time seemed to drag on and on, as if he’d been this way for hours. By the time the vehicle came to a stop, he thought he could feel his finger starting to twitch. The flashing red and blue lights told him they were at the hospital and he whimpered as the doors opened and medics started talking to him. 

“Hey buddy, can you hear me? It’s gonna be alright. Hang in there.”

Bloody hell, this was embarrassing, but he couldn’t do anything to argue. He felt himself being pulled onto a stretcher and his car, and the person who’d been in it with him, faded from view. 

[embracethecringeside]

Favorite moments/quotes/random things from season 4 let’s go!

Edge of ToMorty: Rick, Die, Repeat

The death predictions we can see inside the death crystals! They are messed up and very funny

“You little monster, I thought you were masturbating!” “And you took that in stride?” 

All the different versions of Rick

Nazi Morty being a stand in for fans complaining about the new content/bossing around the creators, “Stop asking questions, stop doing meta commentary, just have fun, we’re going on a simple, fun, classic adventure.” “You know what? It would really help if you could say anything over than what you don’t like.” That scene is full of so much sass!

Also “Kill this Nazi prick!”

Hologram Rick(s)!

Rick getting so fed up with dimensions run by fascists that he just kills the Teddy bear version of himself

When Morty killed those bullies and took on the military? What an icon.

Morty turning down skinny dipping with Jessica. Morty I love you but. You made a mistake. 

Hologram Rick going crazy once he became corporeal? 

Jerry knowing what anime is (who told him?)

Summer ruined the season 4 premiere!

The Old Man and the Seat 

The title being a play on “The Old Man and the Sea”. Brilliant.

“Our daughter ran off with a frisbee golfer because of some app with a really dumb, really forgettable name, like a really dumb, uncreative, super sweaty name.” as the camera panned out to show us they had decided Lovefinderrz was the best the best name Jerry could come up with

Morty breaking all the computers with a tennis racket

“You think were stupid but were not, we know apps have something to do with servers!”

Rick going to a gorgeous planet so he can use his secret toilet/Rick having tech that doesn’t look like garbage?!!

Rick doing all that work to find Tony, only to soften and not kill him when he learns he is okay with dying because he is sad his wife died.

Tony’s speech

The fact that Tony’s dream heaven is his wife, toilets, and dildos

“Watch Space Beverly Hillbillies so my jokes can land.” 

 “I’m going to mother you until your 18th birthday even if I get thrown in jail for non-consensual mothering!” 

Beth and Summer’s fight at the airport

When all the Hologram Ricks make fun of Rick (but this is a favorite because it makes me very sad)

One Crew Over the Crewcoo’s Morty

“Your boos mean nothing! I’ve seen what makes you cheer!”

“Every breath I take without your permission raises my self esteem!” 

“Lab coat, rip off Dr. Strange.”

“You son of a bitch I’m in.”

Rick’s heist outfit

“No randotron it’s not a good time!” “That’s why it’s random.” followed by the random shit that he made them do, eating diapers, running around in circles, putting stuff from the fridge into the oven, laying in the street, butt scooting, eating a bird that turns into an egg then cracks open to be hamster or some shit idfk it was just so random. Loved it

Rick and the robot arguing for hours on end

the revEAL THAT RUINED MY LIFE

The fucking wink at the audience. He knows what he did. I’ve got some choice words for you Mr. Sanchez, like you. and are. a JERK

“Big storm coming.” Vague and ominous. Thank you Rick.

Claw and Horder: Special Ricktim’s Morty

“First off, I always slay it queen.”

The dragon looked. so. awesome.

“If there was ever a saying about me I would fly myself into the sun.”

“We followed the scent of sulfur and skankery!”

“Slut dragon!”

 “Who the fuck are we, who the fuck are y-” “We are the slut dragons”

“We like it down here because we can fuck woolly mammoths, get out!” “Get out of here Micheal!” “Shut up Micheal!”

“Shadowjacker! You haven’t come out of your masturbation cave in eons!”

Shadowjacker has a staff with a dildo on the end and it squishes as he walks

And while I felt weird about the soul orgy that happened... I thought the Phoenix dragon looked really cool

When Jerry and Rick discovered whatever the fuck the cats deal was

“It was from space.” “Wow, total mind fuck.”

Rattlestar Ricklactica 

The very idea that Jerry needs to be supervised while putting up Christmas decorations

“You’re slightly lighter than air, and now your shoes are heavier than air, which makes you neutrally buoyant. Which I find personally, to be more impressive, conceptually, than walking on water, but what do I know? I wasn’t born into the God business, I fucking earned it.”

Space snakes

Snake jazz takes me to a dimly lit cafe where I’m sipping on a hot cup of coffee and listening to a live snake jazz band and feel completely at peace. So yes Summer, I do love it.

That moment where Jerry floated up out of the basket ball court uncontrollably!! 

“You ever see this one look up at the stars like its dreaming of something more?” “No, but uh, all those ones marked with a red sticker? Yeah, any snake more than 50 bucks yearns for the beyond. I’ve seen ‘em do it.” 

Snake time travel!! This part was fucking crazy I loved it

“I am the Jesus Christ of Christmas!”

Jerry vs. ceiling fans

Rick biTING OFF A SNAKES HEAD WHILE TALKING

The fact that Rick did not know snake math, meaning he had to go from learning the snake math equivalent of 2+2 to developing snake time travel for the snakes because it was only the snake 80s in our timeline and the snakes hadn’t invented time travel yet

TIME COPS!!!

Beth doesn’t have Jerry’s number in her phone

The snakes eating their own tales after being busted by the time cops

“I couldn’t hear you over the sound of my own screams.”

Boob world??? I would like to see it

Time travel Rick and Morty being mean to the other versions of themselves

[alo-piss-trancy]

My brain started hitting me with ideas out of nowhere earlier today and:

I think I'm starting to really like the concept of Te/ruTeruxGun/dham akfghlkl (and also Ter/uTeruxHaji/me but to a lesser extent)

Not as OTPs of course, my main ships are way too strong to be dissuaded but they are kinda cute/interesting concepts c':

BIG SPOILERS FOR BOTH MAIN AND ISLAND GAME BELOW!!!

Teru's FTEs in island mode with H/ajime were cute tbh (I haven't done the actual date stuff with him, I just mean regular FTE route). You know, minus the drugging at the end. He would obviously have to develop to the point of Not Doing That and better himself as a person before Haji would ever want to legit date him lmao

I don't have a lot of concepts for them yet I just like that Haji is deadpan enough that he wouldn't put up with any of Teru's bullshit but also he can be flustered easily at times so Teru could still pull some teasing over on him every so often lol (or a lot. Make Haji go bright red and choke on his drink. I love the idea of Teru flustering him to death and being a smug lil shit about it). And also Teru picking the one who's supposed to be The Bland Everyman is fun because either A. 'Makeover Time' that Haji immediately rejects or B. Teru gets to look More Fabulous by comparison. He is very pleased with this.

Come on Haji the man made you a Pot Roast. A POT ROAST. A GOOD SOUTHERN ONE WITH ALL THE FIXIN'S. MARRY HIM.

Also they're both such sassy bi/s lets be real. Teru is the one who back hand compliments you and Haji will just call you a bitch to your face. They'd be the couple that trash talks everyone as soon as they get in the car/back home. Which isn't a great trait ofc but you know, no one's perfect.

~~~

Okay and for Gu/ndham I have more ideas just because I always do I love him so much

But I really like the irony of Te/ruteru accidentally Catching Feelings for the one guy on that damn island he didn't flirt with lmao. I mean come on, Gu/ndham is pasty af and he's weird and intimidating and tbh I don't think they exchanged like, two words in the game. They stayed away from each other except idk how it happened exactly but oh boy Teru's in deep and he has no idea how to deal with it bc these aren't his normal sexy joking flirty feelings these are Real Fuzzy Feelings (tm) EW WHAT THE FUCK GET THEM AWAY H E L P?!?

Bonus: As usual, G is painstakingly oblivious and that's an extra special hell for Teru bc none of his suave pickup lines or not-so-subtle touches or Love Potions (not drugs this time, probs just fruit punch made special with his fav fruits) are working and he wants to scream

He probably DOES end up screaming and Gu/ndham's even more baffled. H/ajime probably has to step in as wingman for both of them.

G/undham does eventually come around and understand, and also understand 'oh shit I actually do like this short very loud chef'

Teru would probably acknowledge that Gu/ndham is technically the second most 'effeminate' (for lack of a better word, idk fashion) dresser out of the boys on the island and it doesn't look half-bad. He does have good taste in jewelry and his hair proves he puts effort into styling it. The scarf is also nice. If he'd just drop the 3000 layers and Bandaged Dark Wizard Thing he could look very fabulous (and very hot). Gu/ndham might, if he is feeling generous, allow one (1) emo pretty boi makeover. For a single day.

Domestic fluff:

*Teru works rlly hard to learn and make excellent vegetarian dishes even if the lack of giant meat chunks is murder to his southern soul. He also goes out of his way to prepare exciting treats and meals for the D/evas.

*He even lets Gu/ndham help in the kitchen sometimes. Except he always puts too much salt in 'I SAID A PINCH GODAMMIT NOT THE WHOLE DIDDLY DAMN SALT BAG' - 'BUT YOUR DISH REQUIRES THESE RITUAL SALT LINES TO KEEP DEMONS FROM SPOILING IT!"

*There are many arguments about whether or not the hamsters are allowed in the kitchen. Ranging from silly 2 minute banter to full blown life-or-death I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL screaming/crying matches. The hamsters take these opportunities to smuggle food out of the kitchen and leave their master and his new mate to bicker

*they try to avoid discussing meat/dairy farming for the sake of their relationship. However, Teru does get a tiny bit more sentiment for farm animals after seeing G interact with them on the ranch.

* Eventually Teru becomes fluent in G/undham-speak, and likewise, Gun/dham learns Teru's most 'A/vril Lavigne!!!!' Southern. After spending enough time together alone, they can end up speaking in a hideous mixture and everyone around them is even more lost and frustrated than they thought possible. Mo/nomi can't translate anymore. Even Mo/nukuma has a breakdown.

[ohmypreciousgirl]

Otayuri Rec List

CANON

Come Alive by Ren [1,006]

"Can I sleep with you?" Yuri asks, and Otabek's heart skips a beat.

Something More Intimate by Val_Creative [1,294]

Dating usually brings up personal stuff Yuri dreads to let anyone know. It's probably why he avoided it all together. Without trying, Otabek sees Yuri for who he is. He accepts what Yuri tells him without question or taunting.

Hamster in Kazakh is Still Hamster by mousapelli [1,498] {Part 1 of This is Otabek's Hamster}

Otabek has a hamster. Yuri regrets teaching him how to use instagram.

A Roe By Any Other Name by mousapelli [1,848]

The only thing keeping Yuri on his feet is pure spite and the promise of the 4AM Tsukiji Market trip that the first morning in Tokyo definitely necessitates.

on the verge of running into your arms by RennieOnIceCream (Hitsugi_Zirkus)   [1,876]    

“Yurio is a good boy -- uh, when he wants to be,” Yuuri said with a smile. “But in all I think he’s not very used to friends and not very...affectionate.”

“Not cute at all!” Viktor agreed, though he was grinning through the insult.

“Just be patient with him and don’t be surprised when he shows his spikes,” Yuuri said, attempting to smooth Viktor’s words over. “Either way, we’re glad you both can get along with each other and be friends.”

Otabek wasn’t quite sure what the two of them meant -- Yuri had yet to reject Otabek in any way. In fact, with everything Otabek asked, Yuri always accepted him inside his heart without question.

Unexpected by henriqua [1,902]

“Your hair,” is his simple response that definitely doesn't give any answers to the questions in Yuri's mind.

Feet first (Don't Fall) by gunboots [2,361]

Otabek wishes that he could unstick the words from his throat, that he could just explain to Yuri why he matters. The proximity of someone he's been looking at for so long, this close—makes it almost impossible.

The hotel pool by womanroaring [2,525]

“Mila was flirting with you,” Yuri burst out, flicking his eyes up to a spot on Otabek’s shoulder.

“Was she?” Otabek asked, and Yuri lifted his eyes up to his face again. Otabek’s face had relaxed a little but his eyes were even more intense than usual, like he wanted to read Yuri’s mind through his facial expression. Yuri scowled again and looked down at his shoes.

“She’s not really my type,” Otabek added lightly after a second or two.

come over here & overwhelm me by xintong [3,348]

In the summer Yuri turns 16, he grows 6 inches, drowns Viktor in his own tears, and falls in love.

Hands On Education by BewareTheIdes15 [3,945]

Sometimes Yuri forgets that Otabek is older than him. And not just in the "has four years of seniors on him" way or the "his old-ass body is going to crap out of competition before Yuri’s does" way or the "doesn’t have to go to fucking tutoring everyday because he graduated, the lucky bastard" way. Because, like, yeah, all of that’s true, but on any given day it doesn’t particularly matter. They mostly do all of the same stuff, and know all of the same people, and have the same job, so, like, what’s the big deal, right?

Tongues.

Tongues are the big deal.

💖 every time I try, every time I win bythissupposedcrime [4,715]

At least no one’s brought up couples costumes. Yuri isn’t sure how Otabek would react to a live recording of him leaping over a table to fight a reporter, a symbolic stand in for the death of Yuri’s sanity and Victor’s cutesy legacy. He guesses not well, and that is enough to hold his tongue.

Or, Otabek is naturally romantic, Yuri is naturally clueless, and somehow they work it out.

Back and Forth by kiyala [4,840]

Yuri convinces Otabek to get snapchat, just to send selfies of himself making faces at Victor and Yuuri. He gets more than he expected.

 💖 Two Make a Pair by mousapelli [5,009]

It started out as a joke, socked feet on hardwood flooring, but somehow the pair skate became something much more for Yuri and Otabek in the end.

Sequel: Come When Invited by mousapelli [4,458] Companion piece:  Good as Gold by Beltenebra [1,719]

Have not. Will not. by mongoose_bite [5,583]

Yuri knew perfectly well that Victor hadn't always been a moron; he'd looked up to him for years. As far as he was concerned all of Victor's problems stemmed from a single source.

Determined to learn from Victor's mistakes as well as his successes, Yuri took the simple vow not to follow in his footsteps.

No matter what happened, he wouldn't fall in love.

One for the Road by Lumieres [6,129]

“Please, take me away —“ Yuri’s text had been so abrupt that Otabek had to glance at his phone once more to make sure he wasn’t dreaming.

(Or: Yuri is so focused on his career, he doesn’t notice Otabek slowly falling in love with him.)

I Won't Put This One on Instagram by teslatempest [6,132]

“Oh. Shit.”

Otabek sat up, a little concerned by the tone of Yuri’s voice. “Is everything alright?”

“Remember how we agreed we weren’t going to tell anyone we were dating until after this season?”

“...yes?”

Darts Made of Hummingbirds by LiviKate [6,881]

Yuri is struggling with his body as it changes. Otabek is struggling with his feelings about it.

Otabek is struggling with the fact that he even has feelings about it.

down for the count, and I’m drownin’ in ‘em byunhookingstarswithoutpermission [7,180]

“Why didn't you reply to my texts?” Yuri feels himself ask, and he immediately cringes. He almost expects Otabek to laugh at him, but what he gets is a dead-serious boy who replies, “I've forgotten my charger in Kazakhstan”, and he feels like he's going to burst either into tears or into hysterical laughter. 

“You- you are so stupid.” Yuri's voice breaks on the last syllable. “I told you, it didn't matter if you couldn't make it to my birthday.” 

Otabek lies against the door frame and raises an eyebrow at him. “You don't want me here, then?”

Sonata in A Major by Lumieres [8,035]

Yuri is like a meteorite, caught in his atmosphere. If he doesn’t take care of him, he’ll completely burn up, and there won’t be anything left for him to salvage.

(Or: Three times, Yuri and Otabek kiss, only to never speak about it again.)

5 firsts + 1 time it all made sense by aphhun [8,726]

Yuri pressed his forehead against Otabek’s and closed his eyes, nuzzling in contently. The words were unspoken, but by the way, Otabek’s arms around him tightened and drew him into the embrace further? They both knew what hung in the air between them. It didn’t need to be said; maybe it was better if it wasn’t. The easy realization they shared was more than enough.

💖 who can sing both high & low by infiniteandsmall [8,848] {Part 2 of a shore, a tide (no clock, no end, transmit: transcend!)}

Yuri likes how people guess his age right after he shaves his head. He likes how it feels when Otabek rubs his hands over the stubble on the back of Yuri’s neck.

He’d liked the feeling of Katsuki’s hands, firm but gentle, wrapped around his skull as he’d passed the clippers over Yuri’s head in smooth, practiced strokes.

It’s not until a few months after he shaves his head, when he shoots up to one-hundred-eighty-five centimeters, that he realizes he misses the quiet thrill he hadn’t even noticed he’d felt when waitresses in restaurants had called him “ma’am.”

💖 Endurance and Peach Tea by chapstickaddict [11,447]

It takes three years for Yuri to figure himself out and get his head on right. He drags everyone along for the ride. Otabek is the only one to go willingly.

💖 My soul is an empty carousel at sunset. by dawnstruck [13,857] {Part 1 of Demi!Yuri}

Yuri grows up and grows older and grows into himself. Otabek helps. It just takes a while to get there.

💖  i walk my days on a wire by idrilka [14,526] {Part 1 of in medias res}

Asia sucked without you,” Yuri admits eventually after a moment, as he falls backwards onto the bed, his t-shirt riding up. It must be still hot in Saint Petersburg, if the forecast is to be believed, but Yuri has the hood up, obscuring his face at this angle. “But we all went back to the hot spring run by Katsuki’s family after the Fukuoka show, so I guess it wasn’t that bad.”

Somebody to Love by aphhun [16,654]

They've been best friends for four years, since Barcelona. Yuri Plisetsky is positive that he's thrown it all away in one miscalculated half-drunk instant.

CANON DIVERGENCE

But I’m Not There Yet by sarahyyy [4,535] {Part 1 of songs about love}

“Are you not going to read the article?” she asks, flopping onto his bed. “Look who ranked second, just after Phichit Chulanont.”

Otabek reluctantly scrolls down, and oh.

#2 - Yuri Plisetsky

In the embedded Instagram photo just under that subheading, a very grumpy Yuri is cuddling a very grumpy-looking cat. The caption reads: I found the cat version of me at the shelter today. #iknowisaidnomorecats #canyoublameme

AU

this speed's too much to stop by sarahyyy [1,496]

“Do you…” the man trails off, frowning. “Do you dislike Prince Otabek?” he asks quietly.

Yuri arches his eyebrows. “I’ve never met Prince Otabek,” he says truthfully. “But if he has to go to all this trouble to find someone to marry him, then logically, there must be something wrong with him.”

2843 miles by henriqua [2,124]

Yuri bites his lip and glances out of the window, feeling like even the very gloomy Saint Petersburg is laughing at him and his miserable crush on Otabek, even though Yuri grimaces when he thinks of the word crush.

admiration in falling asleep by viscrael [4,000]

Rooming with Otabek is fine. It really is—they’re best friends, Otabek is the perfect roommate, and there’s nothing about each other that they don’t already know to make it weird.

💖 science of the social by aphhun [8,862]

Otabek, young CEO and darkhorse of the wildly famous Altin family, isn't exactly on top of his social media and engagement with fans and business opportunities alike. Enter Yuri Plisetsky, social media expert and his new personal advisor. Beware the comments section of Instagram.

💖 infinitesimal being by sarahyyy [9,816]

Yuri snorts, and pushes his glass of ice tea away. “Alright, it’s been fun listening to your story, but I actually do have other more important things to do than to listen to you telling me that I’m destined to be your bride.”

He stands, and Otabek follows suit. “If it’s the terminology you have an issue with-”

“It’s not,” Yuri assures him. “It’s more of the fact that everything you’ve told me so far sounds like a goddamn fairytale that only children believe in.”

💖 hood & glove by Fahye [12,473]

"I don't mess with the fae," Otabek says.

"I'm not asking you to mess with them," JJ flat-out lies.

💖 Gravity by Fahye [15,902] {Part 2 of Yuri!!! in Space}

His Grace the Archduke Yuri Plisetsky wins the Ballistic Grand Tournament in his debut year, at the age of fifteen.

Things go downhill from there.

[aphroditeurl]

If I'm doing all the asks then so are you.

>.> fineeee

1. If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time?

Play video games, I’m not gonna lie about that. 

2. What’s your favourite piece of clothing you own/owned?

I have a black dress I bought for myself a couple years ago that makes me look like a badass Bond villain. And I look sexy as all hell in it. 

3. What hobby would you get into if time and money weren’t an issue?

I want to make custom dolls idk

4. What would your perfect room look like?

PINK i’m a fucking girly girl

5. How often do you play sports?

Never...I am not into sports. Watching others though is fun

6. What fictional place would you most like to go?

Diagon Alley

7. What job would you be terrible at?

Anything involving math. So I would make an awful accountant.

8. If you could turn any activity into an Olympic sport, what would you have a good chance at winning medal for?

Being sick apparently...nah I’m pretty good at graphic design I think

9. When was the last time you climbed a tree?

I am afraid of heights so never

10. What is the most annoying habit other people have?

loud chewing, I will want to murder you I Promise

11. What job do you think you’d be good at?

Anything with animals, I have a passion for them

12. What skill would you like to master?

A different language. Being bi-lingual would be cool. I hate English. 

13. What would be the most amazing adventure to go on?

Oh fuck I want to travel. Even to places considered “dangerous”. I want to go everywhere, I have A NEED. I’m a sucker for those exploration videos on youtube. 

14. If you had unlimited funds to build a house that you would live in for the rest of your life, what would the finished house look like?

Firstly it would be a beach house because I love water and beaches. Secondly, it’d have at least four bedrooms, maybe six. And a full sized basement. I want it to look Magical As Fuck. For reasons. There will be an aquarium in it.

15. What’s your favourite drink?

Coke. The drink.

16. What state or country do you never want to go back to?

I miss Michigan a lot. I loved it there. 

17. What songs have you completely memorized?

A lot?? too vague

18. What game or movie universe would you most like to live in?

STARDEW VALLEY. Sustainable farming is sexy. 

19. What do you consider to be your best friend?

@sedris-the-meme-king

20. Are you usually early or late?

Early. Like twenty minutes early. Anxiety fuels me.

21. What pets did you have while you were growing up?

A lot of cats, a few dogs, hamsters, and a couple bunnies. I love animals.

22. When people come to you for help, what do they usually want help with?

Relationship advice

23. What takes up too much of your time?

Depression 

24. What do you wish you knew more about?

Space law. Which is weird. The concept of space really scares me but it’s also a little fascinating. 

25. What would be your first question after waking up from being cryogenically frozen for 100 years?

“is my cat ok?”

26. What are some small things that make your day better? 

Getting random texts from ppl. 

27. Who’s your go to band or artist when you cannot decide on something to listen to?

Rihanna or Halsey 

28. What’s the best way to start the day?

By sleeping in a little longer

29. What shows are you into?

Anything that’s paranormal, pretty much anything on TLC, Gordon Ramsey is Good

30. Who has impressed you most with what they’ve accomplished?

@floating-in-the-dark for being a good bean 

31. What age do you wish you could permanently be?

18. That was a fun age dude. 

32. What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch?

13 Reasons Why, Game of Thrones, I’m petty 

33. What would be your ideal way to spent the weekend?

Video games, ice cream, kissing, things of that nature, maybe going to the movies, exploring a haunted abandoned hospital, casual things you know

34. What is something that is considered a luxury, but you don’t think you could live without?

My phone

35. What’s your claim to fame?

Idk what this means???

36. What’s something you like to do the old-fashioned way?

Dating. I’m sort of a cliche geek ok. 

37. What’s your favourite genre of book or movie?

Horror for movie and fantasy for books

38. What have you only recently formed an opinion about?

God phoning. Non-pagans won’t get this. 

39. What’s the best single day on the calendar?

The first of every month because it feels sorta refreshing

40. What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of?

Sexual education 

that’s a joke but I am also serious

41. How do you relax after a hard day of work?

I watch youtube videos and play some games, or RP

42. What was the best book or series that you’ve ever read?

The Maze Runner. Sorta corny but it was enjoyable. 

43. What’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home?

California. 10/10 would go back. 

44. What is the most heartwarming thing you’ve ever seen?

“I would blink” out of context this makes no sense but it meant a lot to me in context 

45. What is the most annoying question people ask you?

“Are you SURE you’re __ age?” I am small, I sound 12, but yes I promise I AM TWENTY

46. What could you give a 30-minute presentation on with absolutely no preparation?

Harry Potter at any given moment. Esp Draco Malfoy. 

47. What is something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives?

Tbh??? Move away to a completely new place that you have no connections in. That sounds crazy stupid but really, it was the best choice I ever made. 

48. Would you rather go hang gliding or whitewater rafting?

Whitewater rafting

49. What’s your dream car?

1967 Thunderbird bitches 

50. What’s worth spending more on to get the best?

Make-up, and bath stuff 

51. What is something that a ton of people are obsessed with but you just don’t get the point of?

Game of Thrones lmao

52. What are you most looking forward to in the next 10 years?

School. I can’t wait to start college in the fall. 

53. Where is the most interesting place you’ve been?

UP Michigan 

54. What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but just haven’t gotten around to it?

There are lot of ways to answer this. 

I want to try a ghost pepper lmao

55. What’s the best thing that happened to you last week?

I started talking to someone really sweet

56. What piece of entertainment do you wish you could erase from your mind so that you could experience for the first time again?

Undertale tbh

57. If all jobs had the same pay and hours, what job would you like to have?

I’d work at a graveyard no joke

58. What amazing thing did you do that no one was around to see?

Absolutely nothing my dudes

59. How different was your life one year ago?

Extremely different and I sorta miss it

60. What quirks do you have?

I wiggle my mouth from side to side when I am in thought, I tend to rub my nose randomly, I walk on the balls of my feet

61. What would you rate 10/10?

@funkypanda

62. What fad or trend do you hope comes back?

I!! Want!! 90s!! Fashion!! Back!!

63. What’s the most interesting piece of art you’ve seen?

anything @floating-in-the-dark has done

64. What kind of art do you enjoy most?

See above answer

65. What do you hope never changes?

Most of my friendships

66. What city would you most like to live in?

Londonnnnn 

67. What movie title best describes your life?

The Boss Baby 

68. What did you decide to do the work you are doing now?

Huh????

69. What’s the best way a person can spend their time?

Being kind to others

70. If you suddenly became a master at woodworking, what would you make?

Some really weird shit dude 

71. Where is the most relaxing place you’ve ever been?

UP Michigan lol

72. What is the luckiest thing that has happened to you?

Meeting my best friend 

73. Where would you rather be from?

Canada 

74. What are some things you’ve had to unlearn?

My temper, some bad habits that were formed from anxiety

75. What are you looking forward to in the coming months?

School, getting a puppy, summer

76. What website do you usually go on when you have time off?

Tumblrr

77. Where would you spend all your time if you could?

Japannnnn or South Korea

78. What is special about the place you grew up?

Everyone was a community. We all supported each other. 

79. What age do you want to live to?

100+ cause I fear death a lot

80. What are you most likely to become famous for?

The Biggest Baby Award

81. What are you absolutely determined to do?

Finish school and become a zoologist cause that’s the dream

82. What is the most impressive thing you know how to do?

I can code and shit????? idk

83. What do you wish you knew more about?

Space law

84. What question would you most like to know the answer to?

“will I ever be successful at anything” 

[uwugenides]

FACT FOR EACH STAR GO GO GO !!!!!!!!!! :D

⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️When I was little I dropped a can in the garbage on accident and my brother made me crawl in the trash can to get it back out and put it in the right thing.⭐️I have right duane's syndrome. It's a birth defect that makes it so I can't turn my right eye outwards, it stops in the middle and I see double when I try to do it.⭐️I once fell through bleachers from the very top, falling straight down, twenty(20) ft, and I hit five cross bars on my way to the ground. My life did flash before my eyes.⭐️Growing up I wanted to be the first female president. Now I'm a trans man and I hate the government.⭐️I always wanted a husky (I was a wolf and tiger kid) and I got one two years ago and I love her. Her name is Ember.⭐️uhhhhh,,,,,,,, I'm autistic, well specifically I have aspergers⭐️I think you gave me too many stars ⭐️I love space but if I think about the laws of time and space I get too existential and dissociate for hours⭐️I'm having trouble thinking up new facts. F u my friend⭐️I've never been in a play or musical where I didn't have a speaking part⭐️In theatre I played this kid who is two feet taller than me and has non-stop freckled' older brother, so that was fun⭐️How am I supposed to do this without feeling self-centered??? Is that a fact?⭐️I always start writing stories and never finish them.⭐️I have some fucked yo dreams that I will never tell to a single person⭐️Moana is my favorite animated movie, only second to Road to El Dorado⭐️I type like this n lke this n vvvv much like this,,,⭐️I'm watching America's Got Talent right now and it always manages to restore my faith in humanity⭐️also the dancing pumpkin man from that old meme is on America's Got Talent and I love him⭐️I feel so small and then I feel so big and it is weird⭐️I love anyone who messages me, any message or ask. Even hate stuff, like thamknyoi, you took the time to think about me, even if its death wishes, you thought about me⭐️I love doing scary makeup⭐️fucked up shit and horror is my thing, but I can't watch horror movies alone⭐️I used to be really into werewolves and stuff when I first got on the internet and I guess you couldve considered me a furry⭐️I'm in love with my boyfriend⭐️did I mention I love my boyfriend⭐️that doctor who band that was called like Chameleon something??? Idk but they made really good songs. Check them out you guys⭐️COMEDY IS GREAT, FUNNY PEOPLE CAN FUCK ME UP⭐️I'm into dark comedy, but not insensitive comedy. Your racist jokes aren't funny, Barbara.⭐️I love tamale pie. If you haven't had tamale pie you need to have it.⭐️tamale pie and cornbread are the best⭐️sushi is really good⭐️my old choir teacher sang opera and was professionally trained in it.⭐️we had a karaoke day once and he sang karaoke opera for everyone. I'm p sure it was Italian too⭐️we had three foreign exchange students last year at my old school, one from South Korea, one from Finland, and one from Switzerland.⭐️a kid from my school spent part of her year as a foreign exchange student in Spain and when she came back she brought three girls from Spain with her and they cursed a lot⭐️I feel guilty about practically everything I've ever done in my life⭐️SO MANY STARS⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️the Ghostbusters reboot is a very good movie⭐️I want to go to COS (college of the siskiyous) and then transfer to SOU (Southern Oregon University) so hey, hit me up⭐️one is the loneliest number that you ever did see⭐️I'm sad 24/7 but sometimes that sadness comes across as comedy and that the only reason people like me⭐️I'm a minor⭐️I'm hot as fuck, get on my level twunk⭐️I hate terfs⭐️I want to be so rich that if I wanted to I could pay for everyone in the entire North America and South America to have enough food for three square meals a day⭐️i own a hat that says "black lives matter" and I've gotten ripped off my head more than once while riding my bus home⭐️I have a slight hitchhikers thumb⭐️I was born with brown hair but by the time I was two months old my hair was white⭐️I have owned four(4) rats, two(2) rabbits, seven(7) cats, two(2) guinea pigs, five(5) dogs, and one(1) hamster named Eddie.⭐️I am a self-taught horse-rider⭐️I have been to two(2) rodeos.⭐️I have asthma⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️so I love my boyfriend⭐️I chew on ice⭐️I order snow cones without any flavoring⭐️snow cones without any flavoring are cheaper⭐️SO MANY STARS⭐️I could've gotten more asks by now and I wouldn't know because I'm answering your stars⭐️I cry too easily⭐️I pass surprisingly well for being a trans guy who has not started T⭐️my family once sat at the dinner table on thanksgiving talking about how my mom had the right to hit me and I would not be allowed to defend myself⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I didn't know my dad was alive for the first twelve years of my life aside from the fact that we got the occasional eleven(11) dollar child support⭐️I love dogs⭐️I love cats ⭐️I love birds⭐️I love lizards⭐️I love snakes⭐️I love rats⭐️I love mice⭐️I love fish⭐️that guy on YouTube, Coyote Peterson is my goals as a person. If I could just live as a guy who goes around and finds wildlife I would never ask for another thing in my life⭐️I've recently started playing Pokémon Go again. It's fun⭐️my first Pokémon was a pikachu⭐️I've already traded my first Pokémon for more candies because I'm vain and want to be the very best⭐️I used to be a compulsive liars and would spend hours at night crying because I thought I was a horrible person for it. I was seven(7) at the time.⭐️I'm a trans⭐️koala bears are actively not helping themselves stay alive, not a fact about me, just a fact I like.⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I just got a new kitten named Periwinkle Blue⭐️if I die before I travel to at least one(1) foreign country I will have died a sad man⭐️my great grandpa was Jewish and I carry a lot of that culture and its traditions down with me, despite not actually considering myself part of the religion.⭐️I'm a descendant of the Karuk tribe which is located in Northern California. I speak very little Karuk but it's a very pretty language!⭐️I'm also Irish, German, and as mentioned above (or alluded to at least) Hebrew.⭐️I'm white passing as far as my Native American roots go, and trust me, it is awkward being the whitest person at the tribal meetings.⭐️my birthname was the same name my great grandmother had, but is spelt in the newer form, not the Hebrew translated English form.⭐️I live in a very country oriented town. Everyone owns a cow. Or a pig. I almost owned a pig once.⭐️a lot of people say I'm not actually a trans guy because I was too much of an outstanding girl⭐️my insurance won't cover my top surgery⭐️I work as a dishwasher and it sucks ass⭐️I want to quit my job⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I went vegetarian for two weeks and then caved for a bag of salami someone left on the counter⭐️I drink at least one(1) Pepsi zero a day⭐️the first website I ever roleplayed on was QuoteV.com⭐️my mom just brought me a Fitbit that she got for me. What does this mean?⭐️I'm technically overweight yet look like the average "healthy" body.⭐️I have Mono⭐️I had lice in second(2) grade and lost many of my beloved stuffed animals because of that⭐️because of trauma I regress on occasion and my YouTube watch history is always interesting when that happens.⭐️I have extremely bad anxiety and don't even realize it half the time⭐️Jimmy Fallon is better than Jimmy Kimmel⭐️I once played a union soldier in a civil war reenactment held by a traveling group of reenactors and trust me, they do not mess around. If you've ever been in something like that you know that they are practically in character 24/7⭐️I love little kids but feel like I'm horrible with babies⭐️I fear I'll be a horrible parent and make my child feel the way my mom makes me feel⭐️I tried to get myself emancipated once and sadly failed as I'd gone through with a Or of the process before someone told me I wasn't old enough yet.⭐️stars are dying balls of gas⭐️I love my boyfriend ⭐️ SO MANY FUCKING STARS JESUS HAROLD CHRIST⭐️The H in Jesus H Christ stands for Harold, I looked it up once.⭐️I don't kinkshame but people should be a bit more conscious of what they do in general public access places.⭐️I've been in two(2) abusive relationships⭐️I take a lot of meds⭐️I might start T this year or next year⭐️I want top surgery before I graduate high school or the summer before I go to college⭐️I relate to Tony Stark as a person way to much⭐️I hate when the Hulk is only Hulk and never Bruce Banner⭐️I'm pretty self-confident most the time⭐️I've brought a blanket with me to school on more than one(1) occasion.⭐️I'm naturally a night owl and sleep better when sleeping during the day⭐️I take commissions for my art and you should commission me.⭐️currently I own three(3) dogs and two(2) cats. Mattie, the German shorthair mix, Ember the Alaskan/Siberian husky mix, and Memphis the purebred Doberman pinscher. One(1) adult cat named Freckles and one(1) kitten named Periwinkle Blue.⭐️I love video games.⭐️I love theories. Let's talk theories all day. Any theory, let's talk.⭐️I love talking about sociology and social expectations that aren't realized.⭐️I love collecting odd knick-knacks. I have many weird artifacts around my room, gathered by me or my yard-sale enthusiast grandpa.⭐️I hate Donald Drumpf.⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I hope my boyfriend loves me⭐️the best animated characters to ever exist are Jesse, James, and Meowth from Pokemon.⭐️I'm taking PE independently at my new school⭐️I love singing and acting but I worry that I'm the person that is really bad at it and no one will tell me⭐️I also love doing special effects makeup⭐️sculpting is great fun⭐️I'll be going to the San Francisco comic con this September so if you're there come see me⭐️I'm going to be Dipper for comic con and my boyfriend is going to be Bill Cipher⭐️Arya from Game of Thrones is the best young actress I've ever seen⭐️then again she's not actually that young⭐️I once got stung by a scorpion while being inside my own home on my own bed⭐️till I was like seven(7) I had to share a room with my mom because we didn't have a house big enough for me to sleep anywhere else⭐️my dog Mattie's fullname is Calamity Anastasia Strelow⭐️at the school I used to attend a kid dressed up as a "tr*nny" for Halloween and wasn't told to take off his costume till someone who wasn't trans and out at the school complained and that took me begging my friend.⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I'm Bigfoot and my boyfriend is Mothman⭐️Atomic Blond looks like a really good movie⭐️my first(1) two(2) rats were named Loulou and Pepper⭐️my rabbits were Midnight and Petals.⭐️my hamster was a Russian dwarf hamster and he ended up being eaten by my cat Bobby Joe who was eaten by a mountain lion from the local area⭐️a bear has been seen on my old elementary school's campus five(5) times in my lifetime⭐️wolves were once seen by the only starbucks in my town which was only opened up last year⭐️I live in a major gold mining area and I5 runs right through the town next to mine which is practically where I live⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I've had a full body massage once(1) in my life and let me tell you, you haven't lived till you've had your butt massaged⭐️I've taken like three(3) different classes for martial arts and never really followed through with any of them⭐️I've only been bitten by one dog in my entire life and it was completely my fault⭐️this post is too long Jesus fuck⭐️why⭐️the emoji movie doesn't actually look that bad in my opinion⭐️Despicable Me3(three) was actually a really good movie.⭐️I hate bad acting but I respect the effort⭐️every sibling I have is a half-sibling⭐️I'm a horrible person⭐️but I'm also the only good person alive aside from my friends and boyfriend so I'm conflicted ⭐️The Gay and Wondrous Life of Caleb Gallo is a must see by anyone who considers them self part of the LGBTQ+ community⭐️I don't consider queer a slur personally but I understand the history of it and I never have and never will use it to describe someone or a group of people without their explicit permission⭐️before I came out as a trans guy I thought I was gebderfluid⭐️Chase Ross is an awesome guy⭐️I feel like I look like Ronan from The Raven Cycle with my new haircut, but I always pictured him with a darker complexion so idk⭐️I hate Caitlin Jenner as a person, but not for her gender identity in and of itself.⭐️my phone is getting very warm⭐️these stars are horribly shaded⭐️I love being trans and don't regret it at all⭐️my husky is probably my favorite dog so far⭐️TOO MANY STARS⭐️I don't know anythinh⭐️I'm actually a robot and this is all a lie⭐️I want to be a popular blogger or like a YouTube or something but hhhhnnnnnggg⭐️I'm really into literature and English and history and everything about all of that⭐️I made my signature while scribbling and realized a particular scribble looked like my initials⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I watch too many shows ⭐️I want to be a teacher kind of⭐️I want a better job⭐️I want to be who I see in the mirror when I've got all thecright clothes on and I'm feeling confident ⭐️I want to be a better person⭐️I want to be amazing⭐️I want to be a good human being⭐️I want to be special⭐️I want to be good enough⭐️I want to be happy⭐️I want to be healthy⭐️I want to be happy with who I am⭐️I want to be me⭐️I want to be cool⭐️I want to realize that I can be all this things if I just let myself⭐️I want to kiss John Boyega⭐️I want to hug Chris Pratt⭐️I want to smile the way I smile when I see my boyfriend⭐️I love my boyfriend⭐️I want more scars⭐️I want to be more adventurous⭐️I want to be a great person⭐️I want to live a good life⭐️I want Drumpf to resign⭐️I want to be famous⭐️I want to be immortal for all the good and bad it brings⭐️I want to be good⭐️I want to be happy⭐️I want this to end⭐️I love my boyfriend

[chalitempha]

OC/Kai fanfic Closure

                  Here I am sitting in front of my laptop. My room is a little colder than normal, maybe it's just me. I crushed my phone and locked my door. Now is the time to stop runnig away from my past. I'm a little tipsy but my mind is clear enougth to see my keyboard and the word page on my screen. I need to learn from my memories, from all the wrong and good choices I made, what it could have been and what it was. I'll write everything in a vain attempt to keep these memories forever and I don't want to forget... I'm afraid to do the same error as in the past. I stared at my wrists, the little scars fading across the pale skin, then at my fingers, they looked weird from all the nail bitting, an habbit I picked up from him, it's weird thinking I'm tiping my story starting from so far back .

Bakc then, I was still weirded out by all the new things going on all around me. It had been weeks since we started high school, and I was always alone, you know not popular and lonely. I didn't even try to get along with the poeple in my classes but well it's hard to fit in when all the groups are already made even more so when you're like me, I kinda through they would come talk to me you know? I'm shy... Whatever, I quit my old middle school for this high school where was my older brother and since I missed some of the first days (because I’m dumb and thought it was a few days later), it was too late to make friends. Well it's true I didn't like being this way but it was still better than being bullied, perhaps I was blessed to be ignored at first. Well I didn't stay alone too long since about three weeks later I was suddently inside a group, some "bad influence" they would say but they really weren't. Just a bunch of depressed teens burrying their issues under alcool, weed and cigarettes; it's really something you see everywere around here. Of course I had never seen people like that before but it was just because all my life untill then, I was in a private catholic establishment, and it really does explain everything.

Did I say I admired my brother? Junmyeon-hyung had always been my role model,he's much more out going and handsome than me! I'm so lucky to have such a brother who accepted me for who I was. I'm bisexual and I've known that since middle schools days, you know my mother was really open minded and very supportive of me; she even tried to talk to my father for me. But he didn't want a daugther like that and I never really got to talk with him and ever since we had some big arguments about it, the type where hurtful words are trown in every directions ending with us being a eatch other throats. My brother was the one who aways stoped us. I'm kinda weak but I'd never say it out loud. I couldn't help but be jealous of my brother when they went out, jealous of the perfect father-son relationship they had. But I would never hate my father or my brother. I hope one day my father will accept me and for now my mother and brother are enough.

It was at our third classe of biologie when he first talked to me, the teacher had warned us to take our blouse for today. Looking down a the sprailed corps of some sort of frog waiting to be cut. I took a thin blade and started poking it inside the flesh of the little animal's stomach. I didn't even know what I was doing and the boy rigth next to me started laughing... I was then startled by the one behind me when he lightly tapped my shoulder. It may have been the first human contact (other than family) I had in weeks to be honest . He was a little short but still  taller than me and he smelled like he had just smoked even through his face screamed innocence. Then, as if I didn't have a tiny embarassing heart attack, he explained me the 'how to' do what the teacher asked without having to make the frog into the mess I wasn't aware I caused. He finished with a smirk on his face making him looking a tad arrogant... Way to make someone feel stupid...

"If you're so good you should be surgeon, must be funny cuting open people as a job." I said to him half serious half joking. Then I may have sent him a death glare because, well, he annoyed me. My pride kicked in every so often making me very hard to talk to. Must be why I didn't have friends. Then again, I'm probably asociable by nature.

"Wow, you really sounded like a psyco you know?" then he bursted laughing. He was a funny felow. I was mildly surprised at the outburst and my eyes probably went wide making him laugth even more. His laughter was infectuous, so obviously, I followed his example and laugthed with him. We made small talks over the dead frog between us untill the end of the class.

He was called Kai, well that's what he told me, in reality his name was Jongin but he think Kai is cooler. It's the type of guy you don't see everywhere. You meet someone like him only once in a lifetime then you do your best to never forget. He looked like the average popular kid at first sight, really, you wouldn't know his mind is like a fucking death trap or a maze at best if you only saw his cute perfect face... and he's more of a nerd than a popular kid really.

After biologie he presented me to his friend Yifan, a tall guy ,a really tall guy well if that count as presenting when you scream I JUST MET THIS GIRL AND SHE'S A PSYCOPATH COME HERE in a corridor between two classes... Only then he remembered that of course he hadn't asked my name... Or maybe he did remember but  just didn't care?

Kay surprisingly took interest in me in an experimental way. I just went with it. What could possibly go wrong ? haha. Soon we started to get closer and he pushed me inside his group of friends he already knew from middle school. In the circle there was Yifan and Baekyun alias the tall and the smart one ( I just found him anoying, he's a little bit of a smartass) they were also in our class wich made me happy, then there was 'Xiumin' everyone called him that, so much that I forgot his real name,after him came Yixing, Luhan, and 'Channie' his name was Chanyeol but it was fun calling him Channie so we settled for that name and to be true to myself I found him really attractive. The problem was that this group was only composed by guys. With me being the only girl in there... I went thourgh hell in my last town, every days people would give me dirty looks, call me by harsh words behind my back, trow things at me and mostly ignore my existence hence the reason why I had to change high school. It hurt to be judged by hyppocrite and it was still okay. But since here no one knows, it can't be helped and I wouldn't be held responsible for hidding that tiny detail.

I didn't have any idea how long I could keep the lie going but I was willing to do so for has long as I could. But of course life is a bitch. I was starting to fall for Channie, he was straight and was already in a long distance relationship with some  2 years older girl so I knew he was out of reach and maybe, just maybe that's why I fell for him. Maybe I believed it could stay something innocent and I through I knew how to controle myself... Back then I was rather naive I never really loved anyone just tiny crush here and there. It was like I lived in a cocoon all these years, I mean I had never smoked, drank or skiped classes voluntarily and I didn't go out since I didn't have friends, in short my world wasn't much more than my familly, the classes and the bullying. But I mastered the skill of fake smiles and hadn't cried ever since my only friend Tito (my hamster) died by the start of middle school.

So shocked is a weak word to define how I felt when I first came to this new high school. Everyone was smoking and I could tell it wasn't just cigarettes. Everyone were in front of the gates making little groups, blocking the way and puffing on their stick of cancer. And I can't even describe how I felt when I spotted my own brother smoking within one of those small groups!  He told me it was okay that he didn't smoke that mutch and to keep it secret from our parents. I did just that but not without a long sermon about the bad side of smoking and the risks. After a few months I came to an understanding, here smoking meant having a social life. Even the one who didn't smoke carried a lighter just to lit others peoples cigarettes. Smoking became the norm since they were way fewer people who didn't than people who did. I started smoking weed but only during parties and when Kai wasn't watching, he didn't want me to smoke.

Kai seemed to think I didn't know shit about the world and that I was the happiest person alive. I couldn't have denied that I was enjoying the time we spend together because It became the happiest time of my life. He made me think I wouldn't be able to live without him. But did he want to make me feel that way ? I still wonder, maybe it was just me who needed him all along. That wouldn't surprise me. Anyway, everything he and his friends did made me more and more atracted, but the way they smoked all the time was making me worried over their health, they used to hug me to make me shut up. I swear to god they smoked at least two packs a day. But the way he was with me was different from how he was with his friends, he made me feel like I was so special, so much more important to him. He made me believe I was the only one he could trust.

I would always tell him to stop smoking and that it was bad for his health and I guess we did argue a lot about that. He never listened to me, told me it wasn't my buisness, that I should mind my own and leave him the fuck alone. After four months I stopped nagging him. I knew why he was wasting his life away. He told me. Even if I couln'd understand, even if it didn't make sense to me. He trusted me. Only me.

Because he was broken. He was a sad depressed fuck ruined by his mind and his family. Every week he went to see a psychologue and went to the tribunal. His father his a fucker who left his mother after cheating on her, leaving her with him, his little brother, 5 years younger with autism; and no money to help. But fuck it. His mother broke down. She's a druggie who won't even give two flying fuck about her sons. Of course he's too young to be alowed to do anything. But the thing is that he doesn't fucking care. He tried to kill his father and threatened him with a knife which is why he goes to the tribunal every week, which is why keep bitting his fingers untill they bleed, which is why he smoke untill his lungs burn and his troath is raw screaming at him, making him forget about the world for just a little while. And that's why I don't tell him to stop anymore. Even through it hurt me to see him wither away. Because I can't do anything. If only I knew how to save Kai, if only.

I was happy, happy to know him, happy but so, oh so scared to lose it all... Once he said to me "What esle is there to do but to enjoy what we have now?" It was like he already knew how everything was going to end and he couldn't have been more right. Nothing last forever I knew but still hoped for more. And I shouldn't have because all I did was mistakes.

The last thing he told me was "I knew it wouldn't last. But this was faster than expected."

He died too soon and he killed me in the process.

I still don't what could have been done, where was the mistakes. No mather how much I search for it, nothing.

Maybe it's time for me to understand there are some things you can't do anything about. It wasn't my fault.

Everyday like a mantra I keep telling myself it wasn't my fault.

[shrubforhire]

Asks 1-50

i rly Alright strap in i guess,,

What’s your favorite thing about yourself? uhhhhhh,, Im v proud of my ear for music

What’s the best joke you know? Def the one from who’s line "Our top story today: Convicted hit man Jimmy 'Two-Shoes' McClarty confessed today that he was once hired to beat a cow to death in a rice field using only two small porcelain figures. Police admit this may be the first known case of a knickknack paddy-whack." Colin Mochrie is a fucking god

If you could only have one of your non-canon OTPs become canon, which would it be and why? I want Elanor and Tahani together so bad bitch,,,

What’s your dream vacation? New York!! Seein a bunch of shows and just chillin in the city :)

If you have a girlfriend, what’s the cutest thing she does? If you don’t, what’s something you do that you think is super cute? Oh my goSh theres so much to choose from fuck,, def one of my favs is she will add like tons of disclaimers to stuff before she says it. like if shes asking a question in class she’ll be like “so this is kind of a weird question, and i totally understand if this steps beyond the boundaries of what we’re talking about, but i figured i’d just ask anyways just in case...” oh my god shes so cute 

How do you prefer to spend your free time? MUSIC,, if i can just dick around and cover songs i like,, i am free

What’s a random fun fact that you learned recently? Bamboo is a grass!

When you play truth or dare, do you tend to choose truth or dare? Why I choose truth because I get nervous and once I was playing truth or dare and i had to kiss each of my friends, one on the lips, one by their cleavage, and one on the inner thigh. I did the first 2 and i was so nervous,, prolly cause i was gay as fuck, and right as i was about to put my face right by the vargooba i was saved by god because my nose started bleeding and i had to go inside,,,,,,,, lmao

What’s your favorite thing about being sapphic? That people assume im not so i can rly surprise em!

Who was your first lady crush? Hayley Williams. Hands down,, bitch

If you’re out, who was the first person you told? The last? (If you aren’t out, who is the first person you want to tell?) I didn’t rly come out ever super officially, so I guess my friend amulet when i told them i had a crush on Hayley Williams like right as I realized it lol.

What scares you the most about the future? The fear that I won’t be happy

Do you have a type? If so, what is it? C o n f i d e n c e also when ppl are really smart and responsible and just have a really good handle on their lives. That sounds rly fucking nerdy. Also when people just go for what they want.

Funniest childhood pet story? When my gerbil died I didn’t realize he was dead, and i was so surprised that he didnt run away when i opened his cage like usual. and he even let me pick him up!! i was like wow!! he’s in such a deep sleep. then i didnt feel his heartbeat and i was like oh fuck. this story isnt really funny oops.

What’s your aesthetic? gay shit,,, either v feminine in a rly hippie portland kinda way

What’s your idea of a perfect date? Have you been on it yet? not 2 flex but i planned the perfect fuckin date. first we went rollerskating and hungout at the arcade that they had there and played games. Then we got lunch at this rly cute market, and then we went on a walk that was strategically timed by me so we would get to this giant hill with a perfect view of the sunset. and i had planted a secret backpack in the trees with a blanket to sit on and another blanket to keep warm. and we got to snuggle & watch the sunset together (and our first kiss was right when the sun hit the horizon eeeeee)

What does your favorite color remind you of? playing the og nintendo ds

Quiet studier or loud studier? loud studier cause i talk to myself lol

Coffee, tea, or energy drinks? tea bih!! coffee and energy drinks make me anxious

What’s your stance on glitter pens? fuckin,,,, love

Do you believe in love at first sight? no, i believe in attraction at first sight, but love is a 2 way exchange

Who knows you the best and how did they get to know you? oh gosh,, its a toss up between stevie isaac and shay. they just fuckin,,, get it. stevie gets it cause we’re almost the same person. and shay and isaac,,,,, i still have no fuckin idea how they picked up so much info abt me so fast,, they both scary observant holy fuck

What’s your favorite question to ask? To answer? I love asking ppl about their partners and just seeing them gush hehe. Uhhh idk, im a whore & i’ll answer any fuckin q ppl ask me cuz it means they’re actually interested in what i have to say which is wild

Do you like camping? I LOVE CAMPING. Ive only gone fake camping where your car is right next to the tent,, but its still so fun!!!!!!!!!!!

Cats or dogs? (Hamster is an acceptable answer) Cogs. Dats

What does your dream house look like? A house that I can afford. And maybe w a balcony and a secret room that opens with the pull of a specific book from my bookshelf

What’s your random, useless superpower? solfeg. i can usually figure out a song in solfeg p fast 

Tell me about the most beautiful thing you can think of right now. my girlfriend

If you could only hear three songs for the rest of your life, what would they be? Masterpiece Theater III Haunted House  She’s a handsome woman

What’s the most stereotypical gay thing you do?? (Besides being attracted to women) keysmash

If you could time travel without any negative consequences, would you? Would you change anything? I would retake the SATs lol

What were you most afraid of as a child? Are you over that fear? Dying. not rly lol,,,, what happens to ur brain bro?? will all my memories from this life be gone???? wtf bro

Favorite mythical creature? i rly love mermaids,,,, and sirens

Have you ever dyed your hair an “unnatural” color? Would you? i havent,, if i didnt do theatre my hair would already be lavendar lmao

What’s your favorite book? invisible man

If you could live inside one fictional world, what would it be? pokemon

Most embarrassing story? theres so many,,,, oh my god. prolly when i was chillin in bed with this girl i was dating and then i got super bad period cramps and threw up in her bathroom and my mom had to drive me home in case i fainted,,,,,, i have not seen her since

Proudest moment? making my boss double over laughing 

What’s the most comforting smell you can think of and what does it remind you of? garlic,,,,, it means moms cookin :’)

Do you like fluff or angst more? oh my god i love fluff so much,,,, hhhh

What’s the last thing that made you smile? this short lil dog i saw at work,,,,, so kind

What’s the first thing that draws you to a person? (Romantic or platonic or both) c o n f i d e n c e

Your favorite place to be kissed? fuckin,, anywhere,,,,,,,,,,,,,im a v sensitive person

What’s your opinion on zoos? they’re kinda boring tbh,, 

Do you have any siblings? Are you close? i got 2 bros,, we have a good relationship but we dont hangout a lot

Did you have a favorite movie that you would watch over and over as a child? What was it? the year without a santa claus just for the miser brothers

Do you have any tattoos? If not, do you want any? If so, what are they?

What’s your go-to hairstyle? spaaaaace bunsssssss

What’s your favorite flower? it’s not a flower,, technically its a flowering shrub,,,, but i love hydrangea. the color changes based on the pH!! how fuckin cool is that shit??

Are you the first person to fall asleep at a sleepover or the last? Or somewhere in between? somewhere in the middle lol,, never first.