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#jungkook series
yoongiofmine · 2 days
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LY: Love You Better | JJK | Five
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Pair: Idol!Jungkook x Playmate!reader
Summary: Jungkook never wanted a playmate of his own before. While living a busy life, touring the world, being one of the top kpop idols alongside his Bangtan hyungs, he had everything he could possibly need. But now that responsibilities call and his brothers are starting to focus on their solo careers before eventually enlisting one by one, Jungkook feels lonely. Maybe hiring a companion to take care of his needs and fill in the empty space in his life isn’t such a bad idea anymore…
Chapter warnings: ………yes, smut again, don’t come for me. Dom Kook, competitive Kook. 
WC: 6.3K
[Membership]
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“Come on, Kook, do this with us!” Jimin pleaded, a drink away from draping himself over the maknae’s lap. 
“I’m not in the mood, hyung, I’m sorry.” the youngest shook his head, more than happy with just sitting where he was, on one of the red couches of the bar Hoseok decided to close down to have his birthday celebration at. 
“But we have a routine!” Taehyung insisted, shoulders down and slumped. 
“Yes, a routine that we don’t need. That we haven’t needed in years.” Jungkook pointed out, bringing the beer bottle to his lips for a sip. 
“Just because we don’t need it, doesn’t mean it’s not fun.” the second to youngest continued. 
Jungkook was never the most outgoing of his members. The idol much preferred small get togethers or dinners at one of the other guys’ homes. But Hoseok hyung, being as friendly as he was, and with his impending military leave happening soon, chose to hire a whole bar in the middle of Itaewon for his close friends and some family members to celebrate with him. 
It was closed enough that he knew none of the guests would post anything about tonight, everyone was enjoying good company and drinks, not worried about their phones. It was nice, really, and Jungkook knew he’d start relaxing after a few beers. 
But for now things still felt a little weird. 
Their group wasn’t complete, Jin hyung didn’t have enough military days to request a leave yet. Joon hyung was already lost somewhere with Soyoon, a singer Hoseok had introduced to him last june, at the Jack in The Box listening party, and Jungkook was pretty sure they were secretly hooking up. The fact that this would be the last birthday he’d celebrate with Hobi hyung was also sitting heavy in his chest. 
“Alright, you two, leave him alone.” speak of the devil, the birthday man was doing his rounds to be a good host, shooing Jimin and Taehyung away with a wave and a laugh. 
“But–” Jimin tried, being shushed by Hoseok. 
“Let him get a couple drinks in, I’m sure he’ll join you in your mischief in a minute.” Hoseok sat next to Jungkook on the yellow, stained, leather couch, hand resting on the younger man’s thigh. 
Jimin and Taehyung were huffing for all of two seconds before linking arms and laughing about anything they planned on doing next. If Jin hyung was there, they’d most likely rope him into their doings.
“How are you feeling tonight?” Hoseok asked him with a squeeze to his knee. 
“I’m great, hyung, this place is cool.” was his answer, which sounded a little airy as it was delivered on the mouth of the beer bottle. 
“Yeah, you look like you’re having the time of your life.” sarcasm laced the hyung’s words, but the laugh that accompanied it softened the blow. “I saved your ass right now, but you won’t be alone here all night.” 
“Where’s Yuna noona? I like you better when she’s around.” Jungkook poked, pout covering the end of the bottle to chug a sip. 
“Yah, I’m just looking out for you while I can!” the older man was laughing again, pointing with his head to the side where his playmate was. “She’s with Yoongi hyung over at the bar.”
Jungkook’s eyes scanned the place, taking in the atmosphere. He had never been to this particular bar before, as it was on the smaller side, so it would most likely be packed with tourists and locals if the hyung hadn’t closed it down for his party tonight. 
The first floor was for the bar, a makeshift dance floor and sitting areas, where the second half-floor apparently had some games like old school video game machines, pool tables and coin karaoke booths. 
The bar itself was near the door and, just like Hoseok said, Yoongi and Yuna were there. The hyung was sitting on a tall bench, legs parted so the woman could fit in between. Yuna was laughing at something Yoongi said, hand on his chest as she pushed him playfully; his pink gums were out as he smiled like a fool in love. 
It was a scene that brought a twist to Jungkook’s stomach, turning back to Hoseok, who was also watching the scene unfold. 
“Shouldn’t she be with you? It’s your birthday.” the maknae asked, slightly worried. 
“She’ll come home with me tonight, that’s what matters.” Hoseok shrugged, bringing his glass to his lips, eyes only leaving his girl and his best friend when he continued: “It’s important for them to get used to each other, so there’s no awkwardness when she starts to work for him.”
“Again, you’re okay with that?” 
“Have to be. She needs the money, and I’d rather she works for Yoongi than someone random.” the hyung sounded worried, no doubt having talked about his enlistment plans with Yuna. After working together for so many years, his absence was something she needed to be aware of. “It’s easy for idols to feel entitled when it comes to playmates, you know? Nolichingu is a good agency, but there are horror stories about places that let their workers get mistreated and abused if it meant bringing more money in.”
“Really?” Jungkook’s eyes were wide, as he never gave the playmate thing much thought before wanting to hire his own, lines forming between his brows as he wondered about your experiences. 
If you’ve been in that career for half a decade, you must’ve had as many bad experiences as good ones. 
“You’re a better man than I am, hyung.” the younger man admitted, eyes finding Yuna and Yoongi again. As the woman typed something on her phone, the hyung stared at her with stars in his eyes. Jungkook wondered if Hoseok could see it too. “If that was Yn–”
“You’re a jealous boy, Jungkookie. Always have been.” Hoseok shrugged, patting him on the shoulder. “I’m only telling you this because, like I said, I’m trying to look out for you. Yuna, Yn, any other playmate… They aren’t ours. They work with us, yeah, but don’t let yourself get carried away. They don’t belong to us.”
“I know that, hyung.” Jungkook grumbled, gaze dropping to focus on the green bottle between his fingers, tracing the bumpy patterns on the glass. 
“Good, then.” Hobi hyung didn’t sound all that convinced, but steered the conversation nonetheless. “I take it you’re getting along?”
“Y-you could say that.”
His stuttering only came out when Jungkook grew nervous, cursing himself for his own slip. The man sat beside him gasped and turned around to properly face him. 
“Ohhh, Jungkookieeee.” Hoseok mused, high pitched laugh and eyes wide. “You mean you two…? I wasn’t sure you’d ask for that part of the service, I’ll be honest.”
“I didn’t technically ask for it. It, uh, just happened.” Jungkook shrugged, downplaying it. His neck felt hot, and the smile on his lips was telling. 
If this was Taehyung or Jimin, they would have demanded the sordid details, but Hoseok was kind enough to only ask: “Was it nice?”
“We didn’t have sex yet.” he explained, voice low. “But we kissed. And stuff.”
“And stuff?”
He nodded. “It was nice, yeah, very nice.”
“So that’s why you weren’t interested in wingman-ing with Jimin and Tae?” 
Before he could agree with the hyung’s conclusion, heeled steps approached the two of them, making both men turn to see Yuna and– 
“Heeeey, you made it!” Hoseok was getting up as he saw you standing with his girl, a pretty smile on your glossed lips as you opened your arms to hug him. 
“Happy birthday, Hoseokie-oppa!” 
Jungkook had last seen you this morning, when he dropped you off at the building you lived at, no hopes of seeing you again before Monday morning. He had asked you if you were coming tonight, knowing being friends with Yuna and Hoseok would mean you were invited, but you told him there were things you and your roommate needed to do at your apartment, so you’d be unable to make it. 
You looked really good tonight, with a black mini-skirt with the tiniest red heart prints and a long sleeved, body fitting, black cashmere shirt with buttons at the front; the buttons of your top near your chest were fighting for dear life, sitting snug against your breasts. Layers of necklaces sat on your collarbones and that’s where he pretended to look when he got up to greet you. 
“Hi, Kook!” you hugged him next, your chunky boots making you a couple inches taller than he was used to. 
“Didn’t think you were coming.” he said quietly, breathing in your perfume; soft and floral. 
“Her roommate is an asshole sometimes.” Yuna explained before you could. 
You gave the group a half hearted nod of agreement as your arms unwrapped from Jungkook’s middle, moving to stand beside him. 
“You want a drink?” Jungkook was the one offering, but before he could keep you, Yuna held your hand and pulled you away. 
“You already have her five days of the week, aren’t you tired?” Yuna teased, but you whined a complaint at the underlined insult. “We need some gossip time, I’ll bring her to you in a second.” 
Jungkook couldn’t argue, nor defend himself as you were taken away towards the bar so you and your friend could talk. Him and Hoseok were still standing when the hyung patted him on the back. 
“You, my friend, got it bad.” 
“Excuse me, how can you say that after watching a five second interaction?” Jungkook pointed out with a frown, but he already felt more awake just from the simple fact that you were here. 
“You were sniffing her hair.” the man deadpanned and Jungkook felt his face flush. 
“So?” he chided, one hand inside his pockets to feign nonchalance. “I sniff your hair all the time.” 
“You have known me for twelve years.” 
“She smells good!” was his defense, a very poor one at that, but it’s what he had. 
Jungkook was particular about what kind of smells he liked, he’d always been that way. His mother used to joke that it was because of his big nose that he could smell things a lot more strongly than others. He had no idea if it was accurate, but strong scents made his nostrils burn. 
He never had that problem with you. Your body wash was mellow and the perfumes you liked to wear were always soft and floral, a little on the sweeter side, which seemed to match you. 
Besides, Jungkook wasn’t ready to admit to his hyung just how bad he had it for you. 
Now that Yuna was busy with you, Yoongi joined the two-person group of Hoseok and Jungkook near the yellow couch. Jungkook took his seat again, leaving his empty bottle at the small table in front of him, Hoseok on the other cushion and Yoongi on the armchair right beside it. Not too long after, Namjoon and Soyoon turned them into a five piece group, all of them ignoring how the lips of the newcomers were swollen and slightly red. 
Yoongi spoke of his tour and how he hoped all tickets sold out, going over the venues he'd perform at, wishing the rest of the members would come see him. Jimin definitely would. Hoseok wasn’t sure if he could. 
Soyoon mentioned her collab with Namjoon, who was staring at her mouth the whole time. The woman was sweet. Nerdy too, kinda bossy in a fun way; it was surprising that the hyung would go for someone like that. 
Conversation floated around him, but Jungkook’s eyes were trailed to the bar, where you and Yuna were talking animatedly about something he couldn’t hear. The maknae thought he saw slight annoyance on your features at some point, or something akin to disappointment. Yuna noticed it too, giving you a hug and ordering more shots of whatever you were having.
When both of you had full glasses of colorful drinks, you made your way to the group again, making Jungkook fix his posture a bit more. 
“Relax, kid.” Yoongi was the one to notice, muttering behind his whiskey glass. “Play it cool.” 
Jungkook nodded, back resting against the couch as he draped an arm around the back of it, knees parting in a hopefully-natural manspreading. He pretended not to notice you walk this way, laughing at whatever Hoseok was saying. 
Yuna was the first to reach the seats, taking perch on the arm of the couch beside Hoseok. 
“What did we miss?” Yuna asked, slight slur to her words, which made Hoseok smile fondly and wrap a protective arm around her hips. 
“Nothing much.” he replied, kissing her on the arm under the attentive eyes of Yoongi. 
That was a mess Jungkook didn’t plan on getting involved with, nor would he be able to as you sat by his side on the couch, tucked under his stretched arm, glossy eyes and lips around the plastic straw you were sipping from. 
“Hi.” you greeted again, knocking the air out of his lungs. “You look handsome.” 
“I was about to tell you the same thing.” his lips were pulled up at the sides as his head tilted downwards to study your face. He liked the shimmery makeup on your lids. 
“No one ever told me I’m handsome before.” you giggled, proud of yourself for that little joke. 
“I meant I was about to tell you I’m handsome.” Jungkook played along with a grin, any noise around the two of you getting muffled, as if you were in a bubble. “You’re just pretty.” 
You were laughing sweetly, pastel pink nails a contrast to your red drink and the black  sleeve of your shirt. Jungkook didn’t think he ever saw you in clothes with colors. Not that he minded, his own closet was filled with blacks, grays and the occasional white. It was just something he noticed.
“What are you drinking?” he carried on, watching you slip the straw from your mouth. 
“No idea what it’s called, but it’s strawberry.” you lifted the glass towards him in offering. “Wanna try?” 
Jungkook gave you a small nod, liking the way your eyes followed the movement of his lips as he drank from your straw, tasting your gloss along with the alcohol, feeling the sticky of it on his mouth. 
After the sip, the fingertips from the hand that was behind you on the back of the couch dragged on the side of your neck as he said:
“You like it sweet and gentle, don’t you, doll?” he meant the drink, which was too sweet and not strong enough for him, but Jungkook loved the way you squirmed next to him, a small puff of air leaving your lips. 
Your mouth parted for you to speak, but you were interrupted as your bubble was popped and Taehyung plopped down on the couch on your other side. Hoseok and Yuna were no longer there, but Jungkook would have no clue about when either of them moved. 
“Hey, Yn.” Taehyung smiled brightly and you had to sit a little more angled so you could look at him, which pressed your side to Jungkook’s. 
“What’s up?” you smiled back, sweet tilt to your voice as you greeted his friend. 
In the almost three weeks you had been working for Jungkook, Tae hyung and Jimin hyung made visits to the house to see you; either bringing take out or drinks to be shared. None of those times had Jungkook been embarrassed by his friends, but he was still warry, letting his arm drop down your back to rest around your waist. 
“Do you like being a playmate?” Taehyung asked; leave it to him to choose that topic to make conversation. 
“Yeah, of course, or I wouldn’t be doing it.” you giggled, most likely taken back by the question. “I think it’s fun. Allows me to travel around and meet cool people.” 
“Is that what you want to work with forever?” the hyung continued, just as Jungkook’s fingers lightly squeezed your sides. 
“Why, you have another job for me?” you laughed, still getting used to Tae’s slightly random ways. “I’m not really looking for a change in career for now.”
“For now?” Jungkook surprised even himself by the glimmer of hope he felt at the prospects of a future you didn’t work with this. 
Jungkook would never shame you for what you did, especially now that he knew what being a playmate really entailed. But he couldn’t help but think about the future… The future where your Playmate/Client relationship might blossom into something more. 
“Well, being a playmate doesn’t really give you longevity career wise. While we look young and pretty is all good, but when we get older… Well, let’s just say you don’t get as many clients picking you in the sea of younger girls.” you explained, looking between Jungkook and Taehyung. “I don’t have plans to stop now, but in the future I might have to do something else.”
“Maybe we can do a drama together in the future!” Taehyung offered, knowing you wanted to be an actress. “That would be fun. We could make a cute on-screen couple.” 
“I think it would be more fun to play a villain.” you added, and Jungkook didn’t want to delve in the relief that flooded him. “Maybe with a nice death at the end of the season…” 
You and Taehyung got lost in the subject, where the hyung told you about how fun filming his death scene in Hwarang was, you asked him questions about his experiences on the set and if he planned on doing anything like that again. 
There wasn’t much that Jungkook could say, as the most acting he’d done was during the filming of VCRs for BTS concerts. But he would still nod and smile whenever you looked back at him, never wanting to feel left out. But Jungkook was more than happy just to hold you like this, gently running his fingers up and down your sides, occasionally kissing your shoulder as if it was the norm. 
A loud yelp coming from the bar interrupted the conversation, Jimin almost slipping from the bench he was sitting at while talking to one of Hoseok’s friends. It made Taehyung laugh at the drunk hyung, but he took his leave with the explanation of ‘someone better keep an eye on him’. 
When it was just the two of you on the couch, everyone else moving around and mingling, you left your empty cup on the table nearby and turned to face Jungkook. Your face was a little flushed from the alcohol, eyes a little unfocused as you studied his face. 
“I like your freckle.” you decided, pointer finger touching the bottom of his lip. “And your face.” 
“I like your face, too.” he chuckled, wondering if maybe your drink was stronger than he thought, or just how many shots you had with Yuna. “Should we get you some water?” 
“Alcoholic water?” you giggled, resting your hand on his thigh, slightly higher than he expected, making him gulp. 
“Water water.” Jungkook told you, making you pout and frown. You shook your head, cute as can be. 
“That’s boring, Kook, this is supposed to be a party.” you pointed out to him, looking around yourself and settling your attention on the stairs on the other side of the room. “What’s upstairs?”
“Some games, I think.” he shrugged, smile growing as your eyes widened. “Wanna check it out?” 
“Will you come with?” you chirped and he nodded, as if it wasn’t intended that he would. 
Jungkook didn’t plan on leaving your side, unless you asked him to. It should be weird, how he already spent his days next to you. But the more he had of you, the more he wanted. It was addicting really, from your personality to the way you looked. It was almost too good to be true. 
You stood up first, offering your hand to Jungkook to take, and led the way on wobbly knees to the stairs. The two of you passed by a winking Jimin and a red eyed Namjoon, receiving a thumbs up from a dancing Hoseok. 
The idol let you walk up first, keeping a hand on your hip to keep you from tripping over your heavy boots. And if he had a nice view of your ass, then that was an unplanned perk. 
“Air hockey!” you squealed as you saw the game table, leaving Jungkook behind as you walked to it. “I used to love this, my brother and I would spend our allowance on the arcade by the mall when we were growing up.”
“Why did you stop growing?” Jungkook asked as he patted your head, making you laugh prettily. 
“Stop that, my whole family is short, okay?” you batted his hand away, not minding his joke. “Wanna play?”
“I only play for a prize.” his arms crossed at his chest as Jungkook rested the side of his hips against the air hockey table. 
“What do you want?” you mirrored him, but as your arms crossed, your shirt became a little tighter and your breasts were just so…
“I win, you lose a button.” his mouth was speaking before his brain could catch up. 
It made you laugh and look down at your chest. “If you want to see them, all you gotta do is ask.”
“I like to earn it.” Jungkook’s shoulders raised and fell, relieved you weren’t offended by his bluntness. 
“I can think of a way or two you can do that.” your arms uncrossed and you touched his chest with a small hand. 
“Yeah?”
“Start the game, Kook.” 
You suddenly sounded sober, which was bad for his competitiveness, but good for his morals. 
Each of you went to an end of the table and as you took the bright yellow pushers and sent one sliding towards Jungkook, the man pressed the button to make the machine light up and tiny puffs of air covered the surface. The red disk was released on Jungkook’s side of the table, which gave him higher chances of starting the game with a score. 
“Hey, Kook?” you called, making him look at you. He froze on the spot as your fingers popped a button on your shirt, letting him see more of your chest, the black lace of the top of your bra a contrast with your skin. “A head start for you.” 
“Jesus, doll–” 
Your smile was almost innocent as you bent down a little more, so you could better look at the table and move your pusher over it to block any of his movements, but it also meant Jungkook had the perfect view of the plump mounds inside your flimsy top. 
You weren’t playing fair and the two of you knew it, too, but you still batted your eyelashes at him, waiting prettily for him to make the first move. 
At least he could say he tried. 
But it was a game lost from the start. 
Not only were you annoyingly good at the game, with fast moves and even quicker blocks, nothing got past you. Unsure if it was his worst nightmare or sweetest dream, your breasts would jiggle and bounce with your movements, which meant Jungkook was too distracted to block any of your own attacks. 
You made one point after the other and when the score was 6x0, you allowed the disk to slip into your side of the table, giving him a pity point. At your seventh point –an ironic number, if he could say so himself–, the table announced your victory. 
While you squealed and celebrated, Jungkook rolled his eyes and huffed at his loss. 
Jungkook hated losing. 
“Why are you called the golden maknae again?” you teased, licking between your lips. 
“You didn’t play fair and you fucking know it.”  he grumbled, shaking his head and avoiding your eyes. 
His attitude made you laugh harder as you walked toward him. “Damn, you’re a really sore loser.” 
“And you’re an unfair player.” 
“You’re cute like this, you know?” you stated and Jungkook’s cheeks betrayed him as he felt the blush creeping up on him, not getting much better as you took his wrist. “Come. I want my prize.” 
Jungkook would give you anything you ever wanted, no matter how annoyed he was. Especially as you walked to the furthest side of the barely empty second floor, the sway of your hips and the round of your ass too enticing for the young man to ignore. 
He had been right before and there really was a coin noraebang up there, which is exactly where you were leading Jungkook to. You pulled the flimsy door open and allowed him to walk in first. 
The cabin was a little claustrophobic, but big enough so his head wouldn’t hit the ceiling and the two of you could stand inside without bumping into each other. The walls were dark blue, reflecting the colorful strobe lights that made the interior feel like a club. A default song was playing, something by an old kpop band his parents used to listen to, as the instructions on how to use the karaoke system were displayed on the LED TV. 
“I don’t have any coins on me.” Jungkook patted his pockets even if he knew he didn’t even carry cash on him. 
“That’s okay, we won’t be singing.” 
Jungkook let his back hit the wall behind him, legs parting slightly as he rested against it. The man was smirking softly as he held you by the hips and let you fall into him. 
“What are we doing, then?” one of his eyebrows arched, even if he could read it in your eyes, and in the way you licked your lips, just what you wanted. 
“You’re my prize.” 
You were standing between his legs, hands on his chest, sliding up to link at the back of his neck as you pulled him closer to you. Jungkook squeezed your hips encouragingly, pressing your body just a bit tighter against him. He let you be the one to press your lips together, mouths moving in slow drags against each other. 
He hadn’t kissed you again since that night in his kitchen, when he came in his pants from dry humping you –mostly because he didn’t know how to ask for it–. Even if you did grow closer and your touches grew more constant. It was obvious he missed your mouth, with how eager Jungkook was to deepen the kiss; bold hands dragging down until your short skirt turned into soft skin and his grip turned firm. You gasped against his mouth, allowing his tongue to lick into yours. 
One of your hands slipped into his long hair and you squeezed it between your fingers, the burning on his scalp making Jungkook kiss you harder. His tattooed hand started inching higher, under your skirt, slow enough that you could tell him to stop if you didn’t want his advances, but all you did was push your ass into his hand. 
Jungkook felt his heart on his throat and blood rushing south with each flick of your tongue, each smack of your lips and each pretty little sound you made. He found lace when he squeezed your ass cheek, making you moan into his lips and press your body harder into his. The pressure on his cock, which was already filling up rather quickly, made him hiss and break the sloppy kiss. 
“Aren’t you glad you lost the game?” you whispered against his mouth, but Jungkook couldn’t answer when you took his bottom lip between your teeth, letting the meaty pillow drag as you bit and pulled. 
“It feels like I won.” he finally answered, long fingers flexing on your ass. 
“For a boob-guy, you seem to like my ass a lot.” you giggled, hand leaving his hair to touch his chest, down to his abs, making him flex his muscles. 
“I like all of you.” he admitted easily, but his hand left your ass to hold your waist. Between kisses delivered to your mouth, he murmured: “You’re my perfect little doll.” 
“Your doll, huh?” 
You weren’t denying it, but Hoseok’s words stubbornly made it to the forefront of his drunk thoughts. ‘They aren’t ours. They don’t belong to us’. It made Jungkook swallow the bitter lump that was starting to form, self doubt trying to grow roots in his heart. Thankfully your lips touching his neck was plenty of distraction. 
You licked and nipped at his skin as his hands roamed your body freely. Jungkook could hear voices and yells outside the booth, Hoseok’s friends playing whatever game was available, but instead of making him nervous, the possibility of one of them walking in on you was exciting. 
He was breathing hard, head tilted back as you explored his neck with your mouth, eyes closed shut. The hand that was resting on his stomach started moving south again; lower and lower until you cupped his erection, humming in appreciation as you felt the size and weight of it. 
Jungkook’s hand stopped at the back of your neck, giving it a light squeeze as you palmed him, rubbing your small hand up and down his cock over his dark denim. 
“Doll.” Jungkook whispered with a whine. You kissed his chin and hummed questioningly. “You feel really good.” 
“I can tell.” there was a smile on your lips as you kissed the mole under his bottom one. 
“But I don’t wanna cum in my pants again…” 
Not only wasn’t it the most comfortable, there was no way he’d spend the rest of the night with his own drying cum in his pants. The probability of him making a mess and someone noticing it was also substantially high. 
“Who said you’re going to?” 
You answered him with a question, but it didn’t make a lot of sense; or at least his blood really was rushing so low on his body that his thoughts were a little sluggish. You dropping to your knees between his legs was clear enough, though. 
“Fuck–” he cursed under his breath, looking at you get eye level with his crotch, hand still rubbing his erection on top of his pants. 
“Is this okay?” you asked, fingers reaching for his button. 
“Yes.” Jungkook hissed, biting his lip to stop a louder moan from echoing in the small booth. 
You batted your lashes at him, quickly undoing his button and zipper and pulling his pants down to his knees. Your pretty eyes widened and your lips parted as you could see the bulge inside his black boxers; apparently you didn’t get a good look at him when you caught him jerking one off with the thoughts of you, as you were taken back by his size. 
Jungkook grew up with six other boys, and boys being boys, they talked, measured and compared. He knew he was well above average, long and also thick. The way you were looking at him, unmoving, as if wondering how you could make it fit, stroked his ego deliciously. 
“Go on, doll.” he encouraged, hips bucking into your hand. “Don’t get shy on me now.” 
“Not shy–” you pouted, fingers hooking on the elastic band of his underwear. “Just highly impressed.” 
His boxers met his pants around his legs and Jungkook’s cock bounced free, leveled with your mouth, making Jungkook dizzy and throbbing. You held him by the base, small hand sliding up and down slowly as you felt the veins and ridges on your palm and fingers that didn’t meet all the way around him, breath heavy as you licked your lips. 
“You’re really big.” you said, face inching closer. 
“Do you not like it?” Jungkook smirked from above you, how you felt about his cock was pretty evident. 
“I like it very much.” you still answered, lifting his cock so you could kiss the underside of it, making him hiss. 
Jungkook’s hands were on his sides, fingers twitching to hold you by the head and push his cock into your mouth. There was no way you didn’t feel it pulsing on your hand, the tip was leaking pre-cum as you kissed up and down his shaft as if you had all the time in the world. 
When you leg go of his cock, your hands rested on his muscular thighs and you looked up at him, mouth open and tongue out. You brought your parted mouth to his cock, letting his tip drag on the flat of your tongue, slight bobbing movements as your wet muscle caught the clear beads leaking from his tip. 
“Close your lips around it, baby.” Jungkook instructed with a horace voice, fingers caressing your pink cheeks as you did so. “Good girl. Now suck on it a little, hm?” 
Your mouth was full, so you didn’t answer him, wrapping your lips tight against his dick and sucking on the head. Your tongue swirling around it inside your mouth was making him sweat and curse obscenities, upper teeth sinking on his bottom lip. The tip of your tongue swiped and poked at his slit, making his hand slip to the back of your head to take hold of your hair. 
“Put some more into your mouth.” Jungkook asked, watching you slide lower, jaw relaxing to fit more of his cock. He loved how obedient you were. “That’s it… Fuck, let it touch the back of your throat–” 
It didn’t take much for him to feel the constriction of your mouth, the tightness of your throat as you pushed him deeper, just barely reaching the middle of his cock. You threatened to pull back, but his hand forced you down. When you looked up to his face, Jungkook searched your eyes for discomfort or uneasiness, but all he found was pleasure and want. 
He watched as you forced him a little deeper, the squeeze around his cock making him groan lowly. Tears rimmed your eyes when he let you pull back; spit connecting your lips to his tip. You spit the excess in your hand and used it to stroke him up and down and you got your breath back. 
“You’re hot like this.” you told him with a raspy voice that made you grimace. “Telling me what to do.” 
“That’s because you’re a doll that likes taking orders, aren’t you?” he teased, collecting your hair in a makeshift ponytail so it’d be out of your way and so that he could better see your face. “And you like being good. Will you be good for me?” 
“Yeah, I’ll be so good.” you whined, pressing your legs together, eyes fluttering as he tightened his grip on your hair. 
“Then open that pretty mouth for me.” he asked, and you did, swollen red lips parting instantly. With his free hand, Jungkook held his own cock and tugged it up, using the hold on your hair to bring you closer. You understood what he wanted, clearly, as you eagerly licked at his balls. “Be gentle, doll… Yeah, just like– oh, fuck.”
You took one of them into your mouth and suckled slowly and carefully while he stroked and pumped his cock, waves and wakes of pleasure washing over him. You mouthed and licked the other one and it was almost too much for Jungkook. 
“Let me have that dirty mouth.” Jungkook sighed, trying to collect himself, but it was almost impossible with the way you looked on your knees for him. 
“You can have anything you want.” 
If only you knew all he wanted to do to you, with you, you might not offer it to him so willingly. 
Jungkook let you take his cock in your hand and you immediately brought it into your warm and wet mouth, slurping and sucking as you were determined to make him reach his end. The idol held onto your hair but didn’t push or pull you, he let you please him however you wanted. 
While your small hand squeezed and stroked what you couldn’t fit into your mouth, your head bobbed with want and need. His tip would constantly hit the back of your throat and you’d swallow around him. Spit was licking from the corners of your lips as you picked up your pace according to the sounds and moans leaving Jungkook. 
You could read his face, notice the spasms of his body, his quickening breath. Jungkook’s balls were drawing up as his stomach tensed, there was a slight tremble to his legs, a little pressure on the back of your head. 
“Gonna cum, doll, fuck–” he admitted what you both already knew. 
It encouraged you to suck him harder, slurping sounds ricochetting on the walls. Your mouth felt so good around him, so tight and warm and messy. You looked like fucking sin; determined, eyes sparkling with unshed tears. Your mouth focused on his sensitive head as your hand tugged him up and down, flicking and twisting fast and hard. 
“Yeah, yeah, don’t stop– ahh, fuck–!” 
Jungkook forgot his surroundings when his lower abdomen clenched and he couldn’t hold back the inevitable no more, not even having the strength to warn you before his cock released thich ribbons of white. You were undeterred as you kept going, slower this time, taking all his load like the perfect good girl, swallowing each spurt, humming and moaning around him. 
You milked him of his last drop, pulling him out of your mouth to kitten lick around his tip to clean him up. When his head tilted forward, half lidded eyes focusing on you, you opened his mouth to let him see you swallowed everything down. 
“Such a good girl for me…” Jungkook cooed, letting go of your hair and caressing your red cheek. “Come up here.” 
You kissed the low of his stomach as you pulled his underwear up, carefully tucking him in, but he handled you to put you back on your feet to smack his lips against yours. You melted into him, arms around his neck as you allowed him to lick around your mouth, tasting himself. 
“I’ll take that water now–” you admitted with a small giggle, sore throat after all your hard work. 
“You can have anything you want.” 
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rkivepetals · 1 day
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Window panels ; teaser.
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NEW FIC DROPPING SOON ITS JUST SOOSOSOSOSOS AAAAAA IM SO EXCITED
If there’s one thing Jungkook knows about his new neighbour, is that she’s a bitch.
Pairing; guitarist!Jungkook x lawyer!femreader
Neighbour au, enemies to lovers, fake girlfriend, idiots in love.
Pure pure romance and fluff. And obviously, comical.
You hated him, hated him the second he came your way while you were running to court, and you hated him even more when he played his Goodman guitar in the middle of the night, and you hated him 10x when he ruined your weekend, or when he begged to you to act like his girlfriend for his grandma. You thought it started with drawing middle fingers for each other on your windows, but you’re not sure if it’ll end that way.
Word count of part one: 8k
It’s coming super soon so if u wanna be tagged just send an ask :)
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k00sblogger · 2 days
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ANYTHING FOR HIM (2)
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" have you no idea that you're in deep? "
Synopsis: 𝘈 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘬𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘣𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 from beginning to end 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘦𝘺es, and 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘢 𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘴𝘵.
Warnings: drug usage, cursing, sexual dream, fingering, abuse?, light gaslighting .
Pairing: Rockstar!jk x Fem!reader
Disclaimer: 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘭𝘶𝘥𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘴, 𝘪'𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘫𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘬𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘢 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦&𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘧𝘭𝘦𝘤�� 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭.
- previous - next - series m. list -
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My frail hands grip the sheets as i'm fucked harder and harder into the mattress, my face being pushed into it by the man behind me.
His muscular body leans over mine, his hips still rocking into me as i breathe heavily into the thick air. "Tell me you're mine, cmon y/n." he rasps out. It's like my ability to speak has been snatched from me as i try to stutter out some type of sentence.
"O-Oh fuck- i'm yours!" My palms began to hurt from how hard i was pulling on the clean white sheets. I look at the ceiling in front of me, my vision blurring as he countinues to pound into me- aiming to get both of us off at the same time.
"My good girl.. mine." the sounds of my ass continuously hitting against his bare thighs rings throughout the room, the sounds of my moans just slightly louder.
His hand comes up snug around my neck, pulling my back to his chest so he can be closer to me. I smell his scent immediately, the expensive cologne covering up the strong smell of sex.
I feel his breath tickle my ear as his thrusts grow slower, my walls hugging tight around his cock as i get closer and closer to my release. "Kiss me.." he utters, his voice right next to my ear.
As i turn my head to lean in for a kiss, i'm shocked at the face i see.
"Jungkook?"
...........
My eyes flutter open as i hear the agonizing beeping of my alarm. I groan as i turn over in my bed, aggressively hitting the tiny stop button on the pink clock. The time reading 11am.
Rubbing at my eyes, the memories of my dream come flooding into my mind. I shoot upwards, my eyes now wide open. The thought knocks the sleepiness right out of my tired body.
I dreamt. About. Jungkook.- holy fuck.
I couldn't lie, i was quite upset at myself. Obviously, i can't control my dreams but he hadn't texted or called me at all like he said he would- so why was i dreaming about him? The situation was disappointing to say the least.
Plus- I'd been keeping the events of the other weekend to myself. I refused to tell viv, she'd absolutely freak if i even told her i'd had a simple conversation with the guy. So, i forced myself to shut up about it.
Trying my best to brush off the dream, I get up and head into the bathroom, hoping a hot shower would clear my head.
The knob creaks when i turn it, the water beginning to pour from the shower head.
When my bathroom finally fills with steam, i decide it should be hot enough. Throwing my clothes off, i step in- the burning hot water coming in contact with my back. I fucking needed this.
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12 HOURS LATER... JK'S POV:
"How much for 3 ounces?" i ask, the cold wind blowing against my face as seojun digs through the duffel bag. Yes, he is my friend- but he's also my dealer.
Buying from him was like a routine. The exact day that i was running low- was when i'd see him again. Regardless of my want for the drugs he provided, i wasn't a addict. I could quit anytime i wanted, i didn't need it.
Seojuns low voice interrupts my thoughts as he stands to his feet, the tiny bags in the palm of his hand as he looks around as if he was skeptical of who could be watching. "You're good bro, i owe you." he mutters.
I nod as he discreetly passes the little bags to me, stuffing it into my pocket instantly. I'd lent him a pretty large amount of money last week, so now that i think about it- this would be just enough to cover it all.
We exchange a few more words before i toss my black hood back over my head and pull up my mask- walking back over to my car undetected.
When i get settled into the car i hear my phone ding, pulling it out to see it's just a random twitter notification. I think for a minute before unlocking my phone, clicking onto my messages and typing up the same number i'd contemplated calling multiple times this week.
Y/n.
She was a interesting girl, and i truly did mean to get back to her- i'd just gotten lost in a few recording sessions this week so i supposed i'd never really gotten to it.
The thought of her makes me think back to what happened backstage the past weekend. I close my eyes as i imagine her pretty body sitting on the couch again, all dressed up to come see me.
My dick hardens in my grey sweats, and i graze my palm over it as i open my eyes again. For a split second I think about jerking myself off in the car, but i change my mind when i realize how stupid the idea was.
I didn't know what it was, but something about her drew me in.
I'd had enough, i rub my index finger over my upper lip out of habit. Spending a insane amount of time thinking about what to text her before I finally type it out.
"You up?"
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Y/N'S POV:
I peel my eyes away from the bright tv as I hear my phone ding. I roll my eyes in annoyance when i realize i left the device in my bathroom, and set my empty ice cream bowl to the side to head into the bathroom.
Oh fuck. As soon as I see the message i begin frantically typing a reply. Obviously i said yes, i mean.. who wouldn't?
He asks for my adress and i send it without thinking twice.
As soon as the text sends, I throw my phone down and rush into my closet. What was cute, but also made it seem as if i wasn't trying super hard? I think for a moment before deciding on a pink mini skirt and lacey blouse.
It definitely was a major contrast to what he'd seen me in at his concert, but it'll do the job. That outfit didn't fit me well anyway.
I'd spent the next thirty minutes doing everything i could to look absolutely perfect. Shaving every single hair on my body, quickly applying makeup, and putting my clothes on- deciding that my hair was fine as it was.
I grow more nervous as time passes, waiting for a knock at my door. I even struggle not to bite my fingernails out of pure anxiousness.
As soon as my nerves begin to calm down, i hear it. Three knocks at my door, no doubt that it was him. I quickly stand to my feet, smoothing my hands down over my outfit to fix some of the small wrinkles before i head to my front door.
My hand sits on the door knob for a minute as i contemplate wether i should've done this or not. Either way, it was too late now- he was here.
Thinking no more, i swing the door open. My eyes meet his as he stands there, hood over his head and duffel bag in hand. "What's your bag for?" i manage to stutter out, and he glances at it as he lets out a quiet chortle.
"You gonna let me in before you question me sugar?" oh god, that nickname again. I don't stand in his way any longer and move aside to let him step inside.
I shut the door behind him when he's fully inside, watching as he quietly observes the apartment. I may have forgotten to mention how much time i put into cleaning my apartment before he got here as well. Clearly it pays off at least slightly, because i hear him whisper- "clean in here.. fits you."
After he takes a look around, we sit on the couch together. I watch as he pulls the duffel bag to his side, and i again wonder what he has inside of it.
"Did you miss me?" he asks, looking at me as he pulls his hood off of his head. I'm immediately taken back to the night we met, remembering how his hair fell perfectly right over his eyes.
"Umm.. i guess." my voice is awkward and timid as usual.
To my surprise, conversation flows smoothly after that. He'd had a way of making me comfortable with the way he spoke to me, and the things he'd asked me about. I'd almost forgotten we'd just met the other weekend.
Time flew by quick, and a hour later we found ourselves watching a movie together. My eyes find themself diverting back over to the duffel bag beside him, noticing how his arm is laying on it.
He obviously notices I'm staring, because he moves the bag between us. "Can i trust you sugar?" he removes his hoodie as he speaks, revealing the black tee under it. I take the time to look at his tattoos, my eyes trained on the letters engraved on his knuckles, and the images splayed over his entire arm.
"Can i?" he pulls me back to reality, and i look away from the bag and back into his eyes again. I nod my head, and he wastes no time in bringing his hand to the zipper- slowly unzipping the bag.
My eyes widen as he tilts the bag towards me so I can see the contents. It's filled to the brim with all sorts of drugs, some that i didn't even know the name of.
I immediately spot a bag filled of marijuana, tiny bags filled with an unknown powder, and random bottles filled with pills. As i look back up at him, his eyes scan mine- waiting for a reply.
"W-What's this for?" my stutter returns- I couldn't deny the fact that this was scary. Was jungkook not who I thought he was? Idiot me for trusting someone so easily, and letting him into my home at that. I wondered if the outcome would be the same if he wasn't famous, & he was just a normal guy. Would i still let him in so easily?
"I want you to try something." he utters, reaching his veiny hand into the bag and digging around. I don't know what the fuck i'd gotten myself into.
After a second of searching, he pulls out one of the smaller bags filled with powder.
"You want.. me to try that?" i let out a awkward laugh, but he doesn't laugh with me. In fact his expression is blank as he poors the powder onto the small wooden table in front of the couch.
"It's just cocaine." is all he says, beginning to use his card to sweep the powder into two fine lines
I begin to reminisce when i was a child, and told myself i'd never do drugs no matter what. What a fucking joke.
He tosses the card to the side when the lines are close to perfect, rubbing a comforting hand on my thigh. "Watch me okay?" nervousness boils in the pit of my stomach as i nod my head, i couldn't believe myself.
I watch attentively as he covers the left side of his nose and leans down to the table. He takes one big inhale and the powder is gone just like that. I'm not sure how to react, but i for sure didn't know if i wanted to do this.
He licks his lips as he slightly rubs at his nose- other than that he doesn't seem effected in the slightest. "Turn on some music."
I bite my lip as i grab the remote, clicking onto spotify. I press the first song i see, sex drugs etc by beach weather. How fucking ironic.
I set the remote back down after i do so and he sits up. "Your turn sugar." he gestures to the second line on the table, staring at me.
don't be a pussy, don't be a pussy, don't be a pussy.
I nervously scoot up, my ass on the edge of the couch. He places his cold hand on the back of my neck, slowly lowering my head down to the table.
I copy his movement and press my index finger to the left side of my nose. I snort the powder quickly, leaning up as my nose scrunches up. My eyes clamp shut at the slight burning sensation in my nose, but it disappears soon after.
He laughs at my reaction scooting closer to me as he moves my hair behind my ear. "Took it like a champ." he says, and i smile at the praise.
He kisses me without warning, his soft lips pressing against mine in a haste. He slips his tounge into my mouth the same way he did the first time we kissed. I relish in the way his hand sits on the back of my head, holding me there.
The tattooed hand caresses my thigh, not yet going past my skirt. I feel him smile into the kiss just before he pulls away, pushing me back to rest on the couch.
"Feelin' anything?" it's funny, because as soon as he asks me it hits me. It's hard to explain what i felt, the best way to describe it is simply disorienting. I'd never done such hard drugs, matter of fact- i'd never done drugs at all.
"I feel weird.." i mutter, helpless to be specific. The air in the room grew hot, and i keep my eyes on jungkook as he leans his head back to rest against the couch as well.
"You'll be alright sugar." his voice sounded loud and quiet at the same time. I stare up at the ceiling in a haze, my vision getting blurry as my eyes flutter closed.
Shit, was it wrong to say i kind of liked how the drug made me feel? I didn't know what it was about it, but i felt good. This was better than people made it seem, no wonder he had so much of it.
He presses my body closer to his, my head now lazily resting on his shoulder as i quietly breathe in and out. I didn't need to hear him say it to know he was enjoying the moment just as much as i was. I could simply feel it.
I listen to his heartbeat and smile, i didn't really care how long we'd known each other at this point- i was just happy he was here with me. His hand caresses my head, massaging my scalp as we lay together in silence. A sweet, comfortable silence.
Needless to say, the night was great. We layed together, ate together, had a pillow fight together, stayed up damn near all night.
In fact, we enjoyed it so much that we kept doing it. We never really put a label on what we were. I guess we were friends- but friends don't kiss do they? And friends don't touch each other the way jungkook touched me everytime he saw me.
This went on for at least a month. He'd come over, we'd snort whatever he had, and spend the rest of the night together. It was fun, but i knew what we're doing was bad- for the both of us.
That was why he was sitting at the edge of my bed now, weeks after the first time we'd done drugs together. Clearly clueless about what i was about to ask him.
"Why'd you call me here y/n?" he lights the cigarette in his hand and takes a long drag from it. I'd gotten used to him smoking in my house at this point, and i didn't really mind the smell as long as he sprayed air freshener around the room afterwards- which he promised to always do after smoking.
"Well.." i itch at my arm, i definitely was a little scared about asking him this. I mean- asking someone to quit a hard drug like cocaine was a big deal.
"I think we should stop doing coke-" i blurt out, if i waited any longer i wouldn't have the courage to ask any more. His head immediately pops up, pulling the cigarette away from his lips as he lets out a scoff.
I feel his sweet demeanor change as he turns to me, his tounge poking at the inside of his cheek. "We?" his voice is tense. Was he actually mad just because i asked?
"Well, yeah.." my voice trails off as i sit next to him on the bed. There's a awkward silence as he raises the cigarette up to his lips again, his eyebrows furrowed.
"Y/n-" he starts, "You can do whatever the fuck you want, i'm not gonna stop just because you want to." his voice is blunt. it kind of hurt in all honesty, but maybe i was just being sensitive.
"I know- i just.. i care for you and doing that isn't good for you, or me." i wasn't gonna give up, i refused to allow him to hurt himself using drugs any longer. I didn't wanna hurt myself using it anymore either.
He doesn't say anything to that, continuing to smoke his cigarette without a word. "Cmon, say something." still, he doesn't speak- smoking as if i wasn't even sitting right next to him.
"Just talk to me! You don't have to be a dick-" as soon as the vulgar word escape my mouth his hand shoves me forcefully. I cry out as my tailbone hits the solid floor of my bedroom. "The fuck is wrong with you- talking to me like that?"
His voice is harsh, he was being serious. If he was looking to shut me up that definitely did it. I don't say anything else as i lie on the floor, looking up at him with tears in my eyes.
When he notices a tear roll down my cheek, his face softens and he quickly pushes the cigarette into the ashtray. He comes to my side and caresses my cheek, wiping my tears away with his thumb.
"I..I'm sorry sugar, i didn't mean to hurt you..." his voice trails off as he looks at me, attempting to help me up. I still don't say anything, i'm not really quite sure how to react.
He helps me stand and immediately takes me into a hug, placing a protective hand on my head. I feel so stupid for feeling safe with him now that he's comforting me. But i know jungkook, he didn't mean to do that.
He moves me back a little to take a good look at my face, placing a soft kiss on my cheek. "Let me help you okay? It's okay." i nod and let him lead me into my bathroom, standing to the side as he flicks the light on.
I watch as he digs into my cabinet, grabbing the first aid kit. I make note of the fact that he knew where it was. It was crazy to me that he'd been to my apartment so much in such little time.
He gently bends me over the counter, grabbing the waistband of my white sweatpants and slightly lowering it. I hiss when the cloth goes over the bruise, and he mumbles a quiet "sorry."
The mark must've been bad, because he hisses when he sees it. He guides me to sit up without another word, not even bothering to try and bandage it. "Lets get you into the shower sugar."
I nod and let him take off my clothes, starting with my shirt as he slowly pulls it over my head. I was kind of nervous about him seeing my body naked for the first time, but my tailbone was hurting so badly i didn't even give it a second thought.
The rest of my clothes pile up on the floor in no time, and he walks me over to step under the shower head. I sigh in content as the warm water falls over my back, running down all the way to the bruise on my tailbone. It stings at first, but after a couple minutes it fades away.
He begins to wash my body with a soft towel, applying gentle pressure as he scrubs my skin. I'm silent as his hand trails down to my private area. I was embarrassed to say the least- but he just scrubs over it just as he did the rest of my body.
Soon enough he places the towel down, looking me up and down. "Can i make it up to you sugar?" oh fuck. I liked jungkook, don't get me wrong- but there was a reason we hadn't did anything too sexual yet.
I denied everytime it got close to the point. Of course i wanted to- i was just scared.
-But, i don't think i could hold off on it any longer, so i find myself telling him yes.
As soon as he gets some form of consent, he pull his clothes off and throws them into the same pile as mine. I try my best to avoid looking at the length of him when he steps into the shower. I don't avoid look at his toned abs though, finding myself staring at the small tattoo across his chest.
I don't have enough time to read it as he gently pushes my back to the shower wall, his long hand falling down to my clit. He's straight to the point as he begins rubbing over the swollen bud, drawing out a needy moan from me.
His eyes never leave mine, it was like he insisted on making me feel nervous. He presses a gentle kiss to my lips as he slips a finger in. When he pulls away he licks his lips, pushing his finger in and out of my sopping cunt.
"Need you to say you forgive me sugar'" his voice was soft, much different than the tone he used with me earlier. I couldn't find the words to speak, my mouth hanging open as his finger ruts in and out of me.
It hadn't even been two minutes, and i felt my orgasm creeping upon me. I hadn't had someone touch me like this in so long, the feeling was almost foreign.
"Say it." he says, his finger now covered in my slick. He kisses my bare chest, water from my skin now on his lips. "F-Fuck i forgive you!" i let out a whine as my orgasm washes over me.
I grab wrap my arms up around his neck as he finger fucks me through it, struggling to stay standing.
"Came so quick." he chuckles, and my face grows flushed. It was embarrassing as fuck.
After i visibly calm down, he pulls his finger out- dragging it up to his lips as he sucks my release off of his slender finger.
His thumb rubs at my cheek, looking at me with a sad look. "You know i wouldn't have pushed you if you didn't provoke me right?" my gaze turns down toward the drain as his other hand softly rubs at the bruise on my tailbone.
"Yeah- m' sorry." a part of me feels like he's kind of gaslighting me. All i did was ask him a question, and that provoked him to push me?
I brush the feeling off as his arms come around my wet body, standing still as he hugs me. I close my eyes to savor the moment, feeling somewhat happy that we made up.
"Cmon- lets get you into bed."
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ahundredtimesover · 3 months
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I Want You to Stay (Series Masterlist) | JJK
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Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags: boss!JK x assistant!reader; idiot strangers to lovers; slow slow burn; k-drama feels (What’s Wrong with Secretary Kim-inspired); angst, drama, fluff, smut
Series Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, unhealthy coping mechanisms; family drama; minor injuries; power dynamics (JK starts off as a jerk); work-related anxiety, feelings of helplessness, insecurities; childhood traumatic experiences, nightmares; sexual harassment, prior incidence of domestic violence (PLS PLS BE CAREFUL WHEN READING); arts and business/property devt talk that’s probably inaccurate; commitment issues & emotionally constipated characters; cold and detached JK; explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter) (18+)
Word count: TBD
Status: Ongoing
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Series summary: Working for Jungkook isn’t the same as working for Hoseok. For starters, Jungkook doesn’t smile, he doesn’t appreciate you, and he gives you too much work. It doesn’t help that he’s incredibly handsome and has women at his beck and call. But as the tension grows, it becomes impossible to resist him. You've dedicated yourself to your job for 8 years so when you finally decide to put yourself first, he asks you to reconsider. And while you know that leaving is difficult, you learn that when it comes to Jungkook, staying is always so much harder.
Inspiration: Stay by Mikky Ekko
A/N: Hiii I am BAAACK! 🫡 This story is finally seeing the light of day after 3 years. I feel a little rusty, especially this being my first new JK series in 1.5 years! But it's also been a bit rough getting back into writing (and in Tumblr) after so long and after the year that was, so there won't be a schedule for chapter releases and I'll probably be a lot slower than usual. I wasn't sure if I was gonna go back to writing but I realized that I've missed interacting with you guys and screaming about stories so I do hope you give this some love. Fair warning that it's a really slow burn and some scenes are reminiscent of k-dramas. There are also sensitive and triggering topics so please proceed with caution!
And lastly, my biggest love and deepest gratitude to @wonwoonlight who's been the sweetest and loveliest person to talk to about everything, including this story. 🫶🏼 I give her credit for her amazing photos of Seoul (check moodboard) and for being the playlist manager. Please send her love as well!💕
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Season 1 -> Playlist 🎶: on the way home
Episode 1 (wc: 12k)
Episode 2 (wc: 11.9k)
Episode 3 (wc: 14.8k)
Episode 4 (wc: 11.4k)
Episode 5 (wc: 14.8k)
Episode 6 (wc: 14.6k)
Episode 7 (wc: 15.4k)
Episode 8 (wc: 17.4k)
Episode 9 (wc: 18.4k)
Episode 10 (wc: 20.6k)
Episode 11
Episode 12.1 - Finale pt.1
Episode 12.2 - Finale pt.2
Season 2 (??)
4K notes · View notes
letjungcoook7 · 4 months
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you and jungkook hate each other, but it's okay for you to have casual fucks. until you decide to break up and he sends you a video with another girl. now you gonna get back at him
☾ w.c: 2,5k
☾ pairing: jungkook x fem!reader
☾ rating: 18+ minors do not interact.
☾ genre: smut, enemies x lovers
☾ warnings: porn without plot, just pure filthy. they are toxic with each other, mention of oc with bang chan and jungkook with another girl. double-con, lots of swearing, spitting, blowjob, deep throat, slaps, hickeys, biting, pussy licking, brief rim playing, clit playing, creampie, petnames, unprotected sex.
☾ author's note: idk i hope you liked it, let me know your feedbacks <3
part 2 - here
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The cell phone flash was in your face and you covered it, giving a naughty laugh, full of false shyness. Chan would bring his phone closer to your stomach, covered in his cum, and mumble something about how hot you were into the phone with his cock in his other hand. He had made a mess of you. On the phone screen, your breasts were recorded and you leaned on your elbows posing for the camera, which couldn't capture your face now. The boy stopped recording and pressed the send button. 
"There you go, doll" he smiled, holding your chin with his index finger and sealing your lips. You moaned softly in approval. "I hope he freaks out." 
You smiled, biting your bottom lip and looking into Chan’s eyes.
"Thank you! You fucked me so good." 
It wasn't a lie, but also, you would be unfair if you said that you thought about someone other than Jungkook while Chan was fucking you. After all, the whole point there was Jungkook. 
Ever since you received that video two days ago of Mi-Nyeo sucking Jungkook's dick, you knew you needed to get revenge. You wouldn't let him win, not at all. So, you were at a party and you chose your ally, Chan. He was perfect: hot, with a dirty look and a big dick energy. He smiled at you and you knew it was going to be easy. And, to make things better, Jungkook adored him.
Jungkook hated you, on the other hand, he hated you so much that fucking you was the best way he knew to relieve the tension. And you've hated him too for as long as you can remember, since you were ten and neighbors. 
Everything got worse in high school when you competed for a scholarship to the same college. You won, of course, but he came so close that they gave him a scholarship too. The tension only grew when you were in college, reaching an unbearable level. But one day you discovered that you guys fucked really well. And you couldn't deny that his cock was the best you'd ever had. But when the casual sex started to get more intimate, with you sleeping together, smiling at each other for no reason, you sleeping with his shirt because it smelled like him and you liked it, even though you were alone and there was jealousy on both sides, you decided to end it all. 
Jungkook was so nervous. He didn't leave it easy, the same night you finished everything, he sent you the fateful video. And today he was going to receive one too – a video of you covered in Christopher Bang's cum. 
You walked down the hallway of your dorm and you heard Jungkook's heavy footsteps, you looked at him who was already close enough to press you against the wall with his body. 
“You dirty bitch” he spat the words at you, close enough for you to smell his drunken breath. You laughed ironically rolling your eyes.
"Don't you like it?" You raised your eyebrow and challenged him. 
He pressed his hips against yours even more, taking a hand to the strands of your hair and pulling them, making you moan.
“Disgusting” Jungkook uttered through his teeth. 
"Let me go!" you shouted and he obeyed you. 
“I’ll never look you in the face again, Y/N,” Jungkook said, making you shrug your shoulders.
“I couldn’t care less,” you said with a dismissive tone, trying to sound as convincing as possible as you walked into your dorm. "Now if you'll excuse me." you murmured, closing the door slowly, trying to give him enough time to enter. You wanted him in and that was part of the plan. Jungkook took a while, but he placed his hand on his door, taking a step into your room and then slamming the door. 
You looked at him, suppressing a smile, satisfied that your plan was going exactly the way you wanted. Jungkook kisses you in desperation, hatred, anger, in an animalistic way. You reciprocate, biting his lower lip remembering the video he had sent you. You ran your hands through his hair and he grabbed you by the waist, pulling you towards him tightly, your bodies colliding and his hands running over the crop top you were wearing and taking it off of you. 
Jungkook just removes his mouth from yours to slide his lips down your neck, running his tongue along your collarbone and leaving several hickey marks on your skin until he reaches your sternum bone, where he scrapes his teeth, then grabbing your nipple with his mouth. Jungkook sucks hard, gives a light bite and runs his tongue up and down your nipple, sucking and making audible noises that make you moan loudly, while he, with a frown, looks at you with a deferred and dark look, animalistic. He was brimming with anger and you knew you were going to be ruined.
The piercing in his mouth made the experience even more enjoyable. My God, how you loved that piercing.
The pressure he applied with suction made you practically scream with so much sensitivity. You grabbed the hair on the back of his neck and scratched the back of Jungkook's neck, hard, leaving him marked too. You didn't care about it and neither did he.
"You're dirty" he growls, separating his mouth from your tit, all shiny with drool and grabbing your breasts with both hands, he squeezed them tightly, making you whimper. "I hate you, I mean it." Jungkook grunted. 
"You say that with your dick so fucking hard" you say, squeezing his groin which locks his jaw. 
"Is this a fucking joke to you?" he said between his teeth, making you squeeze him even tighter. 
"You started this fucking game, now you handle it" you said with a frown and he rolled his eyes, letting go of your tits and taking his right hand to yours and placing it inside his pants. 
You smiled, closing your fingers into a fist and holding the base of his cock, masturbating him. 
“Tell me, Jungkook” you murmured, looking into his eyes. "Did Mi-Nyeo suck your dick properly?" 
Jungkook tilted his head and moaned softly, you moved your hand faster, squeezing him tightly, you could feel him getting harder and harder between your fingers. 
"I hope you enjoyed her blowjob because I'm never putting my mouth on your dick again."
"Yes, you will" he said, unzipping his pants and pulling down his underwear, which revealed your hand at the base of his cock. Jungkook moved your hand away and brought it close to his mouth, spitting on your hand and making you hold his dick again, spreading the saliva over the entire length of his dick. "Or has Chan's dick made you lose all desire to suck dick? Are you satisfied enough?" Jungkook gave an ironic laugh. "I doubt it. A slut who was made to suck dick like you..." he practically growled the words, and made you kneel. In a crude gesture, he pulled his hand away and cupped your cheek, squeezing your skin and forcing you to pout as your head tilted.
“Open your mouth” he orders and, again, you obey. Jungkook then approaches your lips with his and releases a line of saliva into your mouth. "Wait," Jungkook says, looking you in the eyes. His gaze was penetrating, it made you shiver. "Swallow." 
You swallowed his spit without blinking, it going down your throat and you closed your eyes. Before you could reason, the head of Jungkook's cock was already between your lips. Jungkook removed your hair from your face, in a gentle touch, totally different from the other touches he gave you. 
Jungkook then put his dick in your mouth, without you even being able to prepare yourself. You coughed, feeling Jungkook's big dick inside your mouth, him forcing his hips and making you swallow him deeper and deeper. You gagging on him, your eyes watering as you tried to relax your throat to handle him, its made your pharynx burn. Jungkook's cockhead hit you deep and you were almost out of breath, suffocating on his cock. Jungkook smiled devilishly, delighting in every choke you gave his cock. 
His cheeks flushed so red as he roared with pleasure. You could barely hold eye contact, with your eyes watering and him hitting you deep. You tried to breathe through your nostrils and that sight made Jungkook even more crazy with pleasure and mercilessly thrust into your mouth. In an almost desperate act you grabbed his balls, you knew he liked it, but you also knew he was in pain and that was what you wanted. 
He grunted, not changing the way he fucked your mouth at all.
His dick throbbed nonstop in your mouth and you rolled your eyes, knowing he was going to cum down your throat at any moment.
This was not what happened, however, to your surprise.
He took his cock out of your mouth, making you finally breathe. You were a mess and he loved it. Jungkook slapped his tip between your swollen lips and smiled, pulling your hair and making you stand up. 
As soon as you were back to your normal height, he kissed you. Again, his lips slid across yours in a desperation never seen before. His tongue danced on yours in a perfect rhythm because, even with all your desperation, your lips fit together. The kiss was wet, hot. Jungkook nibbled on your lower lip and took both hands under your mini skirt and he squeezed both your ass cheeks and slapped your skin. You pulled the hair from the back of his neck and scratched Jungkook's arm and biceps, which forced you even more against him, making his wet dick touch the inner part of your thigh. 
He continued kissing you until the edge of your bed, where, in one movement, he turned you onto your back. Jungkook made you lean on, hands on the mattress, butt thrust towards him. Your ass was so high in the air that your blue lace panties were showing beneath your skirt. Jungkook lifted your skirt even higher and left your ass exposed. He delivered a few hard slaps, alternating on each side of your ass and leaving marks and welts from his own hand. You moaned loudly, you screamed, you became wetter and wetter.
Jungkook, now kneeling, pulled down your panties in one go and left them above your knee. He held each cheek of your ass with one hand, his large, scarred hands gripping your skin tightly, forcing the phalanges into you, while he brought his mouth closer to the middle of your ass, sliding his tongue along your entire length of your pussy and butt until he reached your rim, where he swirled his tongue. Jungkook left another hickey mark on your ass, as if he wanted to mark his territory; and he wanted it. 
He then stood up and placed one hand on the front of your hip, reaching for your clit, stimulating it with circular movements and up and down, while his other hand held his own cock, pumping it, fitting it at your entrance. 
“Fuck, so wet for me” he whispered, penetrating you in a single movement. You moaned loudly, throwing your torso back, movement limited by him that gave a malicious laugh and stopped you, leaving your body bent over your bed. "So tight, I don't think Chan fucked you properly." His tone was husky and held a dirtiness to it that you couldn’t explain. 
Jungkook began to move his hips against yours, forcing his balls into your entrance while you rolled around, feeling him hit you deep. Jungkook undulated his hips and moved his middle and index fingers on your clitoris. He stretched the tight walls of your pussy, now clenching around him.
"Pretty girl, you were made for my cock and no one else's" he said, moaning loudly and fucking you hard. Jungkook held your hair and rubbed his hips against your ass, getting into a continuous rhythm.
You felt the side of your face against the sheet, your lips parted and your pussy receiving his dick so perfectly that you believed no one would ever fit like that and that was why you moaned and grunted so slyly with each thrust from Jungkook. You moaned his name and he smiled every time you said it. Jungkook held your hip with one hand and looked down, seeing his dick coming in and out of your wet pussy with ease. 
He also couldn't forget the video from earlier. That generated an indescribable possession in him. No one could own you. Not like him. 
"Y/N, moan loudly like a whore." he orders. "Moan like this is the only cock that can fuck you because it is. And I swear if anyone touches you again..." he murmurs and you moan, loud and long, a melodic moan that echoes through the room. 
"Well, I thought you would liked it" you tease, making him hit you deeper and you whimper. "I thought it was okay since there was another slut sucking your dick." 
"Fuck, you should have never let anyone in that pussy other than me," Jungkook says, giving slow, deep thrusts as he speaks. 
"Then you shouldn't have stuck that dick in holes other than mine." this time, you speak through your teeth. 
"I am not-" 
"You should never..." 
"You should never have broken up with me!" he screams. His tone was vulnerable now and you looked at him over your shoulder, but once again, he stopped you from moving. 
Jungkook leaned over you, leaving his mouth close to your ear and moaning your name, with one hand intertwined with yours, pressed against the sheet and moaning slyly in your ear, while his movements became shorter. You rolled against him and whimpered softly. You felt him reaching your cervix and his fingers, which had stopped moving on your clitoris, started moving again. 
Jungkook was clearly throbbing inside you and his moans became shorter and louder and with a few more thrusts, he started to cum inside you. You felt his weight on your back as he relieved himself and cum dripped between your legs. His fingers lost a little of their agility, but they continued to stimulate your clit and you moaned louder to encourage him to continue doing so because the walls of your pussy were squeezing him nonstop and it didn't take long for you to cum too.
It took a few seconds for you to normalize your breathing and so did he. Your legs felt heavy and you couldn't move as he pulled out of you and his cum ran down your legs, dripping onto the floor. 
You stood still for a while while Jungkook put his pants back on and so you managed to get up and sit on your bed, he was already fully dressed. 
"Are you going already?" you asked, a vulnerability in your voice beyond what you would have liked. 
"Yes. I already got what I wanted." he replied, cold and bitter.
keep reading
4K notes · View notes
moonchild1 · 5 months
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jeon jungkook fic rec list (Ⅸ)
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hi everyone wow it's really been a while and i'm on list 9 already damnnn that's alot and list 10 is like half way complete already... soooo you might notice a change in the set up this time around i liked how it looked on my ao3 list so i added it here as well, i absolutely love this list like i've gone over this list a million times it's filled with alot of fics i was absolutely obsessed with, you know how attached i get to the characters and this list holds quite a few of them too so i hope you enjoy reading them as much as i did and you fall for them too... remember to give lots of love to the authors of these fics they are absolute geniuses and deserve all the respect and love in this world for creating these beautiful fics and sharing it with us so be sure to give them a follow, like and reblog or even leave a little comment i'm 100% percent sure it would mean alot to them 🥺🖤 also as these fics contain smut no under minors allowed/interact... if you would like to share some of your favourites or just wanna ramble about fics you love send me an ask i love hearing from you guys and happy reading everyone till next time ✨🖤
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a- angst s- smut f-fluff
series
dreamcatchers by @ggukcangetit f a
↬  DI Jeon didn’t need a new partner. Unfortunately, his superiors felt otherwise; especially considering the extremely high-profile murder that had just taken place in the port city. Recent transfer, DI Choi Yuri finds herself confronted with a new cityscape, unfamiliar people, a hostile partner, and a homicide that is certain to bring back unpleasant memories.  
block party by @minlucent f s a
↬ moving into your new apartment brings back memories of your biggest mistake. neighbours au e2l
a little bit of your heart by @yoongiofmine f s a ft. myg
↬ you had everything you could ever dream of; the career of your dreams as a music producer, the best friends you could ever wish for, and a exes-turned-friends-turned-fuck-buddies relationship with min yoongi. you knew you and yoongi would never move past that and you were okay with it. Until a friend from your past comes back into your life, offering to give you everything you deserve, everything yoongi couldn’t. Will jungkook show you what you’ve been missing? Or will the new guy threaten yoongi enough to do something about it? 
lost stars by @/yoongiofmine f s a
↬ Jungkook was lost. He didn’t know who he was anymore, so he decided to leave and find himself. But he wasn’t expecting to find you along the way, an island girl who has no idea who he is. Jungkook has a secret. But so do you. idol au s2l
secrets we keep by @/yoongiofmine f s a
↬ Being a camgirl was never your main goal in life, but when the pandemic hit and you lost your job, you were desperate. Now, two years later, the world is back to normal and  you are one of the top creators of OnlyChingu; the South Korean version of OnlyFans. A website where idols hide behind anonymous profiles in search of that connection they lost during lockdown. Jungkook was never into this type of stuff. Until he ran into you. He knows you’re his perfect girl, his ideal type. Will he be able to put his own insecurities aside when chasing you? Or will you let the secrets you keep ruin you? idol au
i hate you, i love you by @jungblue s a
↬ You hated him at seven, warmed up to him at twelve, and liked him at fifteen. Now the two of you are twenty years old and inseparable best friends… and you’re absolutely in love with him; he’s in love too—just not with you. 
fatal attraction by @jungcock s a ft. kth
↬ your dangerous ex-boyfriend comes back to haunt you in more ways than one. exes au serial killer thriller
pub golf by @taleasnewastime f s
↬ One night. One stupidly hot man, who just keeps appearing in every pub you go to. Six friends. Nine pubs. Nine drinks. Ten million stupid rules. Let the chaos begin. s2l
animal by @cutaepatootie f s a
↬ boxer jungkook au ANGST
things you don't know by @btsgotjams27 a
↬ It’s been seven years since you last saw the boy that broke your heart. After moving back home, you try everything you can to avoid seeing him around town, but destiny has a wicked way of doing the opposite.
entangled by @caelesjjk f s a ft. kth
↬ Jeon Jungkook is Spider-Man. He saved your life twice. But he’s also been your sweet lab partner in college for the past two years and now someone who is more than just a friend. You care about him…maybe even love him. But something tells you that you aren’t quite sure what love even is. How could you when you have feelings for someone else as well? Kim Taehyung is the handsome stranger you’ve seen around campus and somehow ended up dancing with at Club Onyx. You were upset that Jungkook had stood you up once again and Taehyung made you feel like you were on top of the world. What you didn’t know that night, is the dark secret Taehyung is trying desperately to hide, but the closer the two of you get the more difficult that becomes.
when the end comes by @oddinary4bts f s a
↬ Seven years after you've started dating Jungkook, long distance creates a wedge in your relationship. When the only solution seems to be breaking up, you go your separate ways even though love still lives in the two of you. Will you find a way back together, or has the end come for you and Jeon Jungkook?
new girl by @jjkeverlast f s a
↬ after finding out your boyfriend of 6 years cheated on you, you find yourself moving in with three guys in a loft. what could possibly go wrong?
horizon by @/sokooks f s a
↬ The way you approached life had started to break down Jungkook's emotional barriers. Jungkook couldn't deny that he was drawn to you in a way that was entirely new and unfamiliar. You had become more than just an assignment; you had become someone he genuinely cared about. It was the way you made him feel. With you, he felt more human than he had in a long time. Despite his best efforts to remain detached, his heart had other plans. angel au
searching for nirvana by @/sokooks f s a
↬ he shouldn't be here. he shouldn't be touching you the way he was- but he was here before him. he was your friend, not him. he knew your body, not him. he wanted to be the only one to touch you the way you liked. he he wanted you to remember that. despite the fact that he already had someone waiting for him. best friends au cheating au.
twelve hours by @whatifyoulivelikethat s a
↬ you have twelve hours to make jeon jungkook fall in love with you. he's about to get married. you're the entertainment at his bachelor party - a burlesque dancer. long ago, he used to be the class representative and you used to be the class delinquent. nothing has changed and, yet, everything has.
when it all... by @7deadlysinsfics f a
↬ what’s there to do when your husband says he thinks he doesn’t love you anymore? you pick up the broken pieces the best you can and try to move on
better than me ? by @/7deadlysinsfics f s a
↬ jungkook is clear on what you both are to each other. still, he doesn’t want you to think anyone else is better than him
our first and our last by @thedefinitionofbts f a ft ot7
↬ The first time you met Jeon Jungkook was on your tenth birthday. On that day, he was nothing more than the strange man who jumped into a dark portal that suddenly opened in the middle of the park. The ten year old you just stood in the grass, strands of hair ruffling from the calm breeze that swooped by; head slightly tilted, bright, innocent eyes wide open and staring at him with wonder and disbelief. There was a certain amount of confusion, but your young mind was too naïve to question his actions or what they entailed. soulmate au
dancer in the dark by @gwoongi f s a
↬ Money can’t buy you happiness. Jeongguk, for the longest time, thinks he’s happy. Truthfully, Jeongguk doesn’t know what happiness is until you find him. rockstar au
together by @httpjeon f s a ft.pjm
↬domestic!au, couple!au, stoner!au, gamer!au
hot bot by @/httpjeon f s
↬ purchasing a Hot Bot wasn’t exactly something you ever really planned on. when you do, however, it sends your life down a path of convoluted government schemes and dark secrets.
stardust by @iamtaekooked f
↬ You didn’t believe in soulmates until you lay your eyes on Jeon Jeongguk, the younger brother of your best friend’s husband. That is when you see the red string beginning encircled around your pinky and ending in his
serendipity by @rohobi f s a
↬ After you reveal your inexperienced sexual status to your best friend, Jungkook grapples with the news, startled by the idea that the girl he always thought could get anyone, is a virgin. After finding his porn at 3AM, you decide that maybe it’s about time to stain the white sheets of your world with the colors of a forbidden fruit Jungkook seems to have in the palm of his hands.
chasing shadows by @colormepurplex2 s a
↬ Your job gets you into trouble sometimes. Who would have thought crime journalism would put so many targets on your back? But, it’s happening again, someone’s threatening you. Only, this time, it’s not just you that’s in the crosshairs. Your best friend, Enola, is out on assignment and can’t help like she usually does. So, what does she do instead? She sends her brother, Jungkook, armed with a magic bag, a charming smile, and deductive reasoning skills that prove his worth as one of the best PI’s around.
I gasp once, and in that breath, I accept you in by @inkofyoonkoo f s a
↬ In which Jungkook arrives to your small town to spend the holidays, and you slowly let go of all the ghosts of your past. s2l fwb au
sweet nothing by @adonis-koo f s a
↬ Being a guest at the Jeon Estate after a mishap of being kidnapped and dragged into your brothers affairs isn’t all that bad. Truth be told it brings you a lot closer to the mobster and owner of the estate Jeon Jungkook himself. His two rules are simple, don’t cause trouble and don’t give him a hard time. Somehow you manage to constantly do both in the most endearing way despite being pregnant and waddling around most of the time.
three's a crowd by @/adonis-koo s a ft. jimin
↬ When your mom’s fairytale life begins to bleed over into your world you’re suddenly caught between two men and one big secret, what was supposed to be a relaxing trip soon begins to spiral out of control. All you wanted was a free vacation… ceo au
sleepwalking by @taexual f s a
↬ due to unfortunate circumstances, you ended up managing your ex-boyfriend’s band. you thought you’ve both made peace with it, but suddenly he’s very eager to prove to you that first love never dies.
empty space by @ahundredtimesover f s a
↬ It started as friendship, turned to a casual fuck, then ended in heartbreak. Turns out, he wasn’t who he said he was, and years later he enters your life again, forcing you to face all the emotions you’d been trying to bury. 
OR Officer Jeon looks really hot in his uniform and you wish you didn’t hate him as much as you do.
as the world burns around us by @today-we-will-survive a
↬ You haven’t seen the sun in two years. The Virus wiped out a good three quarters of the world’s population and then the wars that followed wiped out half of that. After everything happened, it was only a matter of time before the different countries started blaming each other and emptied their nuclear arsenals. You’re still surprised Seoul survived – if you can call what it has become “surviving”
hotter than hell by @chateautae f s a
↬ jungkook, lucifer and king of hell, has been cast out of the crimson underworld for a reason he’s unsure of. embarking on his journey for the answer should’ve been easy, if it weren’t for you, the human that nurses his wounded body in her home, and accidentally witnesses the truth of his identity. kickstarting a hellish adventure with the devil himself, you discover lucifer is the most infuriating company ever; and jungkook finds out that maybe his answer to returning home lies within his annoying human confidant.
to turn a bad thing good by @/chateautae f s a
↬ jungkook’s drunken one night stand goes awry when he comes to learn not only is he being forced into an arranged marriage, but it’s to the very girl he abandoned that night—and things get a lot more complicated when you’re the best hookup he’s ever had.
J’aime by @baepop f s a
↬ You’re the newest hire at a local café and head barista Jeon Jungkook takes you under his wing.
Written in the Stars by @/baepop f s a ft. kth
↬ You’re the girl of Jungkook’s dreams, literally. The only problem: you’re taken by his best friend
make me forget by @roseannekook f s a
↬ You are the lead vocalist and main dancer of your company’s first girl group, but on the fourth promotion of your debut song things don’t go as planned. At the brink of an uprising scandal, you seek refuge in the bathroom stalls…and find it in the arms of no one else but BTS’ golden maknae Jeon Jungkook.
one of your girls by @ggukiepie s a ft. pjm
↬ fwb au college au fuck boy au inspired by the song
boy in luv by @/ggukiepie f s a
↬ just two idiot best friends in l*ve college!au, bff!jk, athlete!jk, student council president oc, cheerleader!oc
the boy who left by @/gujoonim a
↬ As your eyes staring deeply into your possible client-to-be’s eyes, something crossed your mind, it was that pair of eyes that you were looking for when you being abandoned at the aisle on your wedding day. ceo au
love sewn by @jvnghxope s a
↬ You’ve never cared about the thin-as-paper walls of your beloved apartment until Jeon Jungkook moved next door. You could hear everything –from his late-night parties on Saturday, to the quality time he spent with his girlfriend in the intimacy of his bedroom. One day, everything ceases. Days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months and you find yourself knocking his door before you can think it twice.
not yet by f s @bratkook f s a
↬ jungkook feels the pang of guilt in his gut when you spot your recent ex out with his new girl, and what better way to make the jerk hurt than to have him believe you were now dating him, the neighbor he had been insecure about your whole relationship.
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one shot
blazes of deceit by @periminkle f a
↬ when the opportunity to finally venture past the stone walls you’ve grown up in presents itself, you jump at the chance to discover the origin of those mysterious lights—even if the trip comes with a harsh truth and a suspicious, yet undoubtedly attractive, tour guide. tangled au disney au
southpaw by @starshapedkookie f s a
↬ Knowing Jeon Jungkook for the better part of your life, you thought you knew everything about him. Well, that was before you two disappeared from each other’s lives at least. When Jungkook suddenly finds himself buying you a coffee to rekindle your friendship, it leads to much more than you bargained for.
house of cards by @jeonggukingdom s a
↬ What does safe mean when you are chased by zombies, when every corner you turn could be the last one for you? What do words like home and future mean when you’re always on the run and every moment could be your last? They mean nothing and everything at the same time and Jeongguk is all of the above. He is your safe haven, he is your home and he is your future. But things like that crumble easily in your world.
enouement by @littlemisskookie s a
↬ War is Hell, but it’s what you had to do to take your brother’s place. Of course, between the days of Hell are little slices of Heaven you’d call your Captain, Jeon Jungkook. mulan au disney au
miss taken by @junghelioseok f s
↬you pride yourself on being a professional, but sometimes your students' parents really test your patience. single parent dilfjk jk e2l
the ex text by @shadowkoo f s a
↬ The 2 AM texts have started again. It’s a bittersweet familiarity that you can’t run away from, and despite wishing to forget him: no one will ever measure up to the exceptional standard set by your ex, and you’ll never have anyone as good as him either. Like a permanent mark on your heart, Jungkook’s presence has become an insatiable craving, an addiction you'll never outgrow or cast aside.
the proposal by @hansolmates f s a
↬Jeon’s the editor-in-chief for Big Hit Publishings, a closet romantic with a penchant for antagonizing his assistant on the reg. When his work visa is in the process of being renewed and he takes a trip to Norway, his eligibility to stay in America is on the line. However Jeon Jungkook doesn’t go without a fight, and in order to save his job he offers you a proposal you can't refuse. based on the movie the proposal e2l
red and gold by @/thedefinitionofbts f s
↬It’s no secret that genius, billionaire, international playboy, and philanthropist- Jeon Jungkook, better known as the CEO of Jeon Industries-and even better known as Iron Man, is one of the most intelligent, wealthy, and powerful men in the world. There’s nothing that can get to him or his ego, that is, until you happen to show up and give him a run for his money. 
burning bright by @snackhobi s
↬there are no secrets in the drift. if jungkook were to see the mess inside your head and heart, laid utterly bare, he’d turn away from you. based on the movie pacific rim
but we loved young by @jl-micasea-fics s a
↬Jungkook is everything you’re not, the ying to your yang. Your tight knit friendship nurtured from childhood survived the major life events that most don’t, and to that end, you suppose you’re fated to be together, until unrequited longing is eventually noticed, and boundaries are forever crossed.
the shoulder on which you cry by @lemonjoonah f s a ft. knj
↬ after moving away from your hometown five years ago, you’ve struggled on every return. each trip back being made out of haste due to an unfortunate event in your life. namjoon has always been there to help you through those moments. but when he can’t be there to support you during your current trip home, jungkook offers to stay by your side and be the comfort you need. 
illusion of choice by @hobibliophile f s a
↬ You’ve grown up with the Jeons, Jungmin and Jungkook, for as long as you can remember, your parents being very close. But little did you know that this is because you are in fact arranged to be married to the Jeon heir, Jungmin. However, a tragedy causes Jungkook to take up his brother’s mantle, and that includes becoming your fiancé.
the blue princess and her red rose by @/cutaepatootie f s a
↬ After all, he was her red rose, while she was just another one of the many blue roses that grew in the dying gardens of Greyria. princess au
rigor mortis by @readyplayerhobi f s a
↬ A night out at a bar results in you going home with a young and attractive police officer. But if you think the night was something to remember, that’s nothing compared to waking up to find a zombie outbreak in the city. A chance encounter with Officer Jeon leads to him helping you escape from the plague infested city.
lowkey by @joonbird s
↬ Jungkook is the nude model for your art school’s life drawing class.
part-time lover by @sketchguk f s a
↬there is no crime more perfect than marrying jeon jeongguk. your relationship is nothing more than a ruse - while your friends pester you for being perpetually single, jeongguk desperately needs a wife to complete the pristine image of a family, fooling his way through the parent interview at the nation’s most prestigious private school. only time will tell how deep your lies will run as you find home in one another’s minds. because untangled in the moonlight, he is but a spy, exposing a secret world of corruption, and you, an assassin, ridding the streets of danger one hit at a time. 
sweet apple biscuits by @rosaetae a
↬ a story about someone who receives letters from themselves ten years in the future and asks them to fix all their regrets and save a particular boy. inspired by the anime 'orange'
i'll be home by @wwilloww f s a ft.knj
↬ When your first love, Jungkook, disappeared from your village five years ago, no one thought he would return, let alone on the night of your betrothal to another man. 
white lies by @noteguk f s a
↬ in which Jungkook lies his way out of and into trouble. But he can’t tell white lies when it comes to you. 
yes coach by @/taleanewastime s
↬ You play in a local netball team and as a new season starts you have a new coach. Enter Jungkook, he may look soft, but he turns out to be a hard taskmaster, one who ruffles your feathers when he makes some changes to the team. Tensions grow between you through the weeks, until they finally reach breaking point.
spf 50 by @gimmeyoon f s
 ↬ If you have to spend your summer home from college working a job you hate, it might as well include sitting by the pool with Jungkook. Now if only kids could stop vomiting in it.
fifth wish by @jiminrings f a
↬ jeon jungkook, world-class socialite and nepotism baby, should be out every night to celebrate while he’s at his prime. why should he fake-date his bodyguard instead? alternatively, jungkook regularly throws coins to wishing wells with only one desire in mind — to get rid of you.
blacklisted by @/httpjeon s a ft. kth
↬after departing from your dom, you’re assigned to two incredibly powerful men.
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↬looking for other jjk fics or the other members check out my library
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luviestarz · 6 months
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jeon jungkook fic recs!
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❁ romantic dreams | jeon jungkook - @kooktrash (he’s always dreamt of finding his soulmate in some romantic way, bells ringing, birds chirping, maybe even a shine of light over their head. he never imagined to find them living next door to him with absolutely no clue to the extent of the growing infatuation he has toward you until it’s a little too late. hypnotized by your entire existence he finds his dreams and delusions of love to be a little too intense for anyone to bear.)
❁ Toned, Tanned, Fit & Ready - jungkook - @thvhoe (Jungkook loves acting like the word "Pain" doesn't exist in his vocabulary.)
❁ redamancy - jjk (part II) - @lesgetittkookie (jeongguk is just a normal dude with a simple routine. wake up, go to the gym, work his job as a waiter at this posh upscale restaurant in the heart of gangnam before coming home to a night full of video games and ramen (it's delicious and cheap). that routine gets disrupted when he accidentally taps the back of an expensive sports car of one of the richest men in south korea. considering he's broke, he couldn't afford to pay for the damages so the man makes a deal with him by offering him to work at his house as one of the gardeners. jeongguk takes it but wasn't prepared to meet this beautiful young woman who's constantly lounging by the pool, you, the rich man's daughter.)
❁ guys my age | jeon jungkook - @kooktrash (a summer spent at your friend’s place wasn’t something to be anything to look forward to. her hot, young dad would seem to change that for you when you decide a game of teasing would suffice your boredom. you got more than you bargained for when you realize he’s not a fan of games.)
❁ perfect timing. - jungkook - @delugguk (one night in a city full of life; what it's supposed to be a friendly and fun dinner date, ends up with a night full of unrevealed secrets and unexpected pleasure.)
❁ ⤷ seven days — jjk - @jvngkoos (jungkook does everything to make you forgive him for seven days, will you pity him and accept his apology?)
❁ visions - jungkook (yandere) - @trivia-yandere (you’re convinced by your friends to go to a party and let go of the memories of your ex just for one night. unfortunately for you, jungkook doesn’t want to be let go.)
❁ ⤷ got her skippin’ work — jjk - @jvngkoos (trying to go to work is an everyday challenge for you with a boyfriend like jungkook, and it’s one of those mornings where he does anything and everything to keep you in bed with him)
❁ ego season masterlist | jjk - @sparklingchim (your ex-high-school crush is now your fuck buddy. you just gotta make sure that your older brother taehyung, jungkook's best friend, doesn't catch you red-handed.)
❁ Devoted to Trouble - @jeonsweetpea (In which the whole world finds out Jungkook is Spider-Man, but he doesn’t care about anything but you. OR Can you survive seven days of Jungkook pining over you while his identity is exposed to the world?)
❁ RAINY DAYS | JEON JUNGKOOK - PART ONE - @rklve (your life choices left not only yours, but jungkook's heart broken in peaces. now you're back in town, and just like pluto, even if it's cold and dark, he tends to orbit around his sun forever.)
❁ seven days a week | jjk (m) masterlist - @jjkeverlast (jeon jungkook has always had crazy ideas, but wanting to fuck you every day of the week was the last thing you expected.)
❁ blueberry haze | jjk - @caelesjjk (he had been eye fucking you from the stage all night. but you never expected anything to come of it. but when you run into the beautiful blue haired drummer after the show, you decide to let him show you some of his other talents.)
❁ cabin fever | jjk (m) - @jeongi (trapped in a cabin with your ex-best friend jungkook, you’re forced to overcome the fallout between you two.)
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muniimyg · 3 months
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ALL AT ONCE // JJK
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seven moments later
+
jungkook confesses and you're in denial
navi | m. list | ask me ! | send an ask to be on the taglist ! i will not be responding to taglist requests anywhere else !
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pairings: unhinged jungkook + shy oc
au/genre:
uni au
friends to lovers
fluff & crack / smut (x) & angst if u squint
mini series
parts:
1: the confession
2: the avoiding
3: the favourite snacks
4: the cold
5: the oblivious (x)
6: the madness
7: the yes or no
end.
+ 3: msgs
+ 6: msgs
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kooktrash · 6 months
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LIMERENCE | jeon jungkook
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summary: a recent discovery of old VCR tapes takes you down a rabbit hole of self-pity, remembering what you once had and how it all went down the drain over youthful mistakes. suddenly, you find yourself playing back the old tapes of the best relationship you’ve ever had and all you can think about is how to get it back—if you could get it back
warnings: angst. smut. [jk and oc in videos: 18-20 | jk and oc now: 26] retired emos. exes to lovers. unprotected intercourse [listen it had been six years they weren’t waiting 😭] jk has a bellybutton piercing and he smokes. jk owns a camera shop. supportive besties Jimin and Tae and Yoongi. Y2K styled camcorders. a small argument on one of the tapes
LIMERENCE MASTERLIST
➢ genre/au: exes to lovers, smut, Y2K videotape style [ ex boyfriend!jk x ex girlfriend!y/n [she/her. female anatomy ]
➢ 18.4k words
song inspo: risk — deftones, 505 — arctic monkeys, afraid — xavier omar, who [feat. BTS] — lauv
The end of a chapter in your life always came when you least expected it. You’ll wake up one day and it’ll hit you that you don’t talk to the same people. You don’t do the same things or act the same way and when you look back at before, it will feel so far from the person you are now.
Standing before your half empty apartment began to bring this growing feeling of sadness inside you. It made you feel stupid but you just couldn’t help it, this was the end of a huge time in your life where you felt like you really began to develop into who you are. After seven years living here, you’re finally moving on and everything that happened here would be left behind. All the laughter, the crying, the break ups that left you balling your eyes out on the kitchen floor. You would soon move into a clean slate and for some reason that was hitting you hard.
It probably didn’t help that your dear friend managed to find a box of things— you haven’t thought about in quite literally years—hidden away in an old storage space on the ceiling. The sides of the cardboard box were in ruins with wet patches and bent corners. There was no writing on the sides but on the top a big line of red duct tape with the words ‘JJK’ and a few small scissors stab marks next to it. Jimin looked up at you with a raised brow, “Are you keeping this one?”
Your expression seemed to flatten as you looked down at it, unsure what to say and he sighed, “Come on Y/n, it’s late, I want to get as much of this out as we can. Are you keeping this one?”
“Um,” You looked back down at it, nodding your head, “Yes.”
Since the day you found that box and told Jimin you were keeping it, all it’s done is collect dust in the corner of your new living room, out of place and constantly on your mind. Your friends were a big help in the move, especially Jimin who had hauled that huge cardboard box up three flights of stairs to your new place without question to what was in it. It wasn’t until he got tired of seeing it sit in the corner for an entire week after everything had been unpacked that he really began to get curious about it.
“So what’s in that thing?” Jimin asked that Friday night you lounged around your apartment, proud to have finally gotten everything out. Tonight was the first night your mutual friend would be over and it was like a housewarming party with the only two people who can stand being around you.
“What’s in what?” You asked, catching a glance at your friend, Somin, who’s knowing eyes bore into yours—already knowing what he was talking about. The thing is, Somin was very aware of what was in that box and she’s been biting her tongue all night from asking why you still had it.
“The box, it’s just been sitting there,” Jimin said pointing to it, “It’s kinda ruining this whole vibe you’ve got going on here with all the black decor and house plants.”
“Just some old stuff,” you shrugged it off, looking back down at the playing cards in your hands, “I haven’t found a place to put it.”
Somin raised a brow at you but you ignored her this time to continue your game of cards and drink your wine. Jimin looked at her, “Do you know what’s in it?”
You sighed, “Jimin, I told you it’s just some old stuff.”
“Yes, Y/n, but old stuff can be a lot of things and that box was heavy so I’m curious,” Jimin said exaggeratedly, “Can’t a man be curious these days?”
“It’s no—“
“It’s a bunch of old home videos,” Somin said as she poured herself more wine casually like she hadn’t just exposed what was inside your secret box. Jimin’s jaw dropped, “Wait, Y/n, you used to do porn?”
“What!?” You nearly choked, “No—well, like on—no! Those aren’t that type of home video, they’re just… y'know old tapes.”
“Like from when you were a kid?” Jimin asked with a scoff, “Let’s watch them.”
“I’m not a kid,” You said shaking your head no, “And no, let’s not watch them.”
“I agree with Jimin,” Somin cut in after watching you begin to panic a bit, “You kept them for a reason, let’s see why. Jimin’s never seen them.”
You laughed nervously, “Come on, it’s just silly stuff, I just kept them for the memory, that’s all.”
“We don’t doubt it,” Jimin said with a smirk, “But come on, let me see one—just one.”
“No.”
“Yes.”
“No.”
“Yes.”
“Fine!”
The three of you huddled around it with a pair of keys using the jagged end to cut into the old tape and the box nearly fell apart just like that. When Jimin pulled the tabs open, the three of you seemed to lean in closer and closer with anticipation for the reveal until finally, a silence fell over you.
Jimin didn’t hesitate from reaching into it, scabbing row after row of old VCR tapes with white labels on the sides with similar titles in a numerical order.
‘JJK 1’
‘JJK 2’
‘JJK 3’
‘JJK 4’
There were 24 tapes in the box and he counted every single one meaning these spanned two years with one tape filmed per month. The same initials that had been on top of the box had been written on the tapes and he couldn’t help himself from picking up the first one. “Let’s watch it.”
“No! No,” you said, taking it out of his hands, “You wanted to see what was inside and you saw, be happy with what you get, I don’t have anything to play these on anyway.”
“I do!” Somin piped in, “I’ve got my old tape player back home, say the words and I’ll go get it.”
“Not neces—“
“Do it.”
What you wanted at the moment seemed to be outnumbered by your friend’s curiosity and your other friend’s need to satiate it. You were left alone with Jimin for twenty minutes as Somin left to get it and he rummaged through them trying to ask you what they were, only for you to evade each question out of stubbornness. Now she’s back and you’re watching them set everything up on your flatscreen while you sat back on your couch chugging back your glass of wine nervously.
Jimin smiled mischievously as he held up a tape, building anticipation before placing it into the player and letting it start.
․ ∘ ⊹ ✰ ┆ JJK 1 : THE SHOP ┆ ✰ ⊹ ∘ .
There was a pungent chemical smell surrounding the register you currently sat on that had the customers in line scrunching their noses in disgust but that didn’t seem to stop either one of you from what you were doing. He worked with one hand as best as he could while you worked on the other applying a cold layer of polish onto his fingers.
A small black nail polish was set down on the counter next to a silver cam recorder that had been angled at the two of you this whole time, capturing on video the way you painted your coworker’s nails. Jungkook bid them farewell before turning his attention back on you, “Hurry up, we’re starting to get busy again.”
“Shh,” you pointed a manicured finger up, “You can’t rush perfection.”
“I’m not rushing perfection, I’m rushing you,” Jungkook said as you brought his hand closer to your lips trying to dry his nails with your warm breath. The video seemed to have a perfect view of the way his eyes glossed over with affection when he looked at you and you weren’t paying attention.
“Oh my god, every girl is going to want to sleep with you,” you eyed his nails proudly, “You look hot.”
“I’ve always been hot,” Jungkook said looking down at his black nails that complimented his black leather and beaded bracelets that lined his wrists, “Okay but how cool do these make me look? Like, would you sleep with me?”
He tilted his head toward you in curiosity and for a moment you just looked at him in thought before finally shrugging, “Yeah, I’d do it.”
“Do what?” Jungkook asked, shaking his black hair out of his face. With the way the camera was aimed, the two of you looked zoomed in but it still managed to capture the way your eyes stayed on each other wordlessly, the tension felt through the screen.
‘Can someone help get a shirt down?’
He watched you hop off the graffiti-covered counter and grabbed the long hook that helped get things down and left with her—not before responding with a simple, “You.”
Once your answer registered in his head, he wasted a single second to look at his camera, wondering if it had caught this small flirty moment the two of you had while you painted his nails and the thought alone made him smirk, biting against his lip ring too. He didn’t think he would get his nails painted at work today but when he saw you doing your own, you convinced him and he spent the last ten minutes messing around with you, flirting here and there.
The shift had been boring for the most part and all the songs that played he'd already heard a million times over. This is his fifth time singing along to Falling Away From Me by Korn. Do you think he wants Korn stuck in his head all day?
His beanie clad head bobbed to the rifts in the song, quietly lip synching as he went back to doodling on an old receipt paper. Some of the ink from the pen he used was smudging and the black hearts he drew were getting ruined but he didn’t care. He’ll either throw it away or stick it on your back if he wants to.
“Beating me down! Beating me, beating me down, down, into the ground,” a voice sang loudly in his ear making him jump in fear.
“Don’t moan in my fucking ear, bro,” Jungkook said holding a hand to his ear, the softness of his beanie tickling his fingers. Taehyung threw himself against the counter with his back pressed against it looking at his friend, “You know you liked it.”
“Fuck off,” Jungkook said as he blew air on his nails again, drawing Taehyung’s attention to them. He stuck a hand out as if waiting and Jungkook put his hand over it to show him his nails.
Taehyung seemed impressed as he asked, “Who did them?”
“Y/n.”
“Y/n!” Taehyung shouted abruptly and Jungkook flinched away with annoyance, ready to tell him you were helping a customer when you popped around the corner with a t-shirt and hanger in your hands and the customer behind you.
“What?” Your brows arched in confusion as you looked at your coworker who has spent the last twenty minutes in the stockroom between Nirvana posters and new Metallica tees hiding so he could play his Nintendo GameBoy. Jungkook was careful not to fuck up his black nails and took the shirt from you so he could check the customer out.
Taehyung pointed to Jungkook’s nails,“Can you do mine next?”
A scoff left your lips, joining him next to the counter standing close to ask, “Are you going to pay me?”
His jaw dropped as he turned back to Jungkook, “What the fuck? Did he?”
“Thank you, have a good night,” Jungkook mumbled to the customer as she left with a new t-shirt before turning to the other two, “I’m buying Y/n lunch tomorrow.”
“I’ll buy you lunch the day after.”
“You can’t. That’s not original.” You said to him with a teasing smirk. The two of you were standing close to each other as you talked, Taehyung’s voice dropped when he spoke to you, “You know what, just because the two of you got a little crush on each other doesn’t mean you’ve gotta favor him.”
Jungkook looked down at the drawing he made, trying his best to act like he hadn’t heard what Taehyung said, but it didn’t stop the growing blush to his cheeks. It’s true, maybe he does have a thing for you but it’s still too early to tell, y’know? He’s not sure how to explain it but you seem to get him. The two of you like the same kind of music and know the same sort of things. You listen to him talk and when he’s quiet, you don’t question it. You make him feel comfortable and when you flirt with him he wonders if you feel the same.
Honestly, that’s all he’s wanted these days, his attraction toward you to be reciprocated anyway it could be. He thinks about you constantly, probably more than what’s healthy but he can’t help it.
“Oh shut up,” you rolled your eyes playfully, feeling the shuffling movement of Jungkook pulling himself up on the counter, “Just say you’re jealous and feel left out.”
“Bitch?!” Taehyung scoffed, “I wouldn’t feel this way if you treated us fairly, instead you give him special treatment.”
“You realize you’re arguing with me over getting your nails painted?” You asked with a roll of your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest, clearly annoyed and once Jungkook saw that he was fully pulling you his way. He threw an arm around your neck, hugging you from behind as he sat on the counter and rested his head on yours, “Ignore him, he’s in a mood because he just got dumped.”
“Fuck you, I broke up with her!” Taehyung nearly yelled, staring at the two of you with disgust as Jungkook fixed the beanie on your head that had slipped a little too low over your eyes.
Just as you were getting ready to respond to him, the door of the stockroom opened and your boss was coming out with a blank expression, “Can you guys do your jobs instead of fuck around?”
“Yoongi, I’m being bullied,” Taehyung argued, “Fire them already.”
“I’ll fire you too,” Yoongi teased before looking at Jungkook, “Get off my counter.”
․ ∘ ⊹ ✰ ┆ THE END ┆ ✰ ⊹ ∘ .
The video came to an end as your old boss stood in front of the camera, blocking out the footage that ended with Jungkook whispering something into your ear.
“Who’s that guy? An ex boyfriend?” Jimin asked as the video came to an end. Somin released a soft laugh as she looked at your blank expression, unsure what to say. Before you could speak up, she was doing it for you, “That's the ex boyfriend. Jeon Jungkook.”
“Don’t immortalize him,” you said with a slight roll of your eyes as you watched Jimin rummage through the box in search of another video to play. Your bottom lip was pulled between your teeth as a strange ounce of nerves began to set in, watching him unlock a deep rooted memory you had told yourself you had forgotten. Somin sent you a knowing look as she matched the roll of your eyes with her own, “How else should I refer to him as? The guy who filmed a video each month that you two were together?”
“Damn,” Jimin laughed, slumping back in a chair as he looked at you, “So how come I’ve never heard of this videographer.”
“Because Y/n’s asham—“
“Alright! No more wine for you,” you leapt forward to snatch the glass out of your friend’s hands watching her giggle drunkenly, “You’re just saying things now.”
“Come on Y/n, I’m curious,” Jimin said tugging on your sleeve, “If you won’t let her tell me… you gotta do it. Don’t act like you don’t still think about it, why else would you have all these tapes still?”
“Because it’s not everyday someone makes 26 movies for you—and not all of them are as happy as this one,” you confessed as you looked down at ‘JJK 1’ it had been a video log of when the two of you really began to show some attraction toward each other just before he asked you out. Looking back at the video all you could think was how back then you were both young, you could see it on your faces and the sparkles in your eyes. Not all of the videos in that box would be like this one.
“Alright,” Jimin sighed, “Well then just tell me who Jeon Jungkook is.”
Sounds of a rock song’s electric guitar blurred out the noises from inside the dark shop. The store was covered in black and dark blue with its black walls and blue hues of light that shined down over dozens of cameras and melancholic portraits. It had an obviously cold aura and for some reason that had a tendency to always bring him comfort.
He felt warmth in the coolness of his small shop and oftentimes it was difficult to leave it behind, even when the night sky had appeared and the ‘closed’ sign had been flipped. The only thing that kept him from spending yet another night in the store was a set of plans that had been made days prior by someone who wouldn’t take no for an answer. When it came time to leave, he locked up shop and left on his motorcycle.
“Look who finally decided to show up,” his dear friend raised a glass of whiskey to him as he sat alone at the bar, “I was wondering if you were gonna come or not.”
“I didn’t realize I had an option,” he joked bitterly, making his friend send him a glare that was quickly wiped away when something came to mind. “So I met this chick, she’s got this friend wh—“
“No.”
“Jungkook,” his friend said, watching his friend stir the ice in his scotch, “You don’t even know what I was going to say.”
Jungkook released a scoff as he looked at him, “You were going to say that this friend wants to meet me and that I should go and get drinks with her or something.”
He sat there quietly, speechless by how spot on his best friend was, “Alright, maybe you did know what I was going to say but just hear me out… she’s hot. Uh, um, she’s your type—honestly, I’m your best friend so trust me.”
“No, Taehyung, you always say the same thing and it's always a huge waste of time,” Jungkook shook his head adamantly, “I don’t get why you’re always trying to set me up with someone whenever you get into a relationship. We’ve been friends for eight years and you’re still this clingy?”
“Okay first of all, fuck you, I’m not clingy,” Taehyung told him with a scoff, “Second, I’m trying to do you a favor considering you can’t keep a relationship to save your life.”
That made Jungkook roll his eyes as he looked anywhere but at his friend. The two sat at the counter of some quiet lounge bar where they had agreed to meet at. He raised his glass to his lips for a drink as he said, “Some people aren’t meant to be in relationship—“
“No, you wanna know what your problem is?” Taehyung cut him off, “It’s that you’re too damn picky. Hate to say it friend, but nobody is ever going to be her.”
His expression hardened as he forced his glare on the silver rings he wore, listening to the way they clinked against the polished bartop. He didn’t give Taehyung a response right away, too busy trying not to roll his eyes again but it was no use, his tongue poked against his cheek and his friend knew he got a reaction. Jungkook tilted his head in thought, “Why do you still bring Y/n up?”
“Because she was your longest relationship,” Taehyung said with a shrug. He was pushing his friend for a response and he felt a little bad but sometimes he just needs to get his friend to talk. Jungkook has always been on the quieter side, even years back. All he did was listen to music and videographed things he liked. He was a bit intimidating—still is—but it was only because he was so quiet. Sure, he knew how to joke around but Taehyung’s known him long enough to feel the difference in his friend lately. He’s become more of a shut-in, busy with the store and not focused on anything else.
“Yeah, six years ago,” Jungkook emphasized with a scoff, “And she broke up with me, remember?”
“I mean… yeah but… don’t you ever think about it?” Taehyung asked suddenly, “I still think about my first love.”
“Y/n was not my first love,” Jungkook’s brows furrowed, remembering the two girlfriends before he ever met you. Taehyung gave him a look, “Not your first girlfriend but definitely your first love. What do you think Y/n’s up to?”
He hadn’t noticed how his leg began to bounce anxiously as he took a sigh, “How would I know? You’re the one who still talks to her.”
“Not true,” Taehyung shook his head no, “We haven’t talked in over three years.”
“Hm,” Jungkook sounded unimpressed as he chugged back the rest of his drink, motioning the bartender over to ask for another round. He wasn’t in the mood to keep talking about this and it caught him off guard.
He couldn’t remember the last time he thought about you but he’s got no doubt in his mind it was because of Taehyung back then too. This is the problem with being best friends with the guy who was with you through all the ups and downs and hasn’t seen you put your all into a relationship since. The only thing Jungkook doesn’t get is why Taehyung is stuck on the idea that he never got over you.
You both were young back then. The end of your adolescence started with the beginning of adulthood and the two of you had just so happened to spend the first two years together like that. You dated when you were 18 and broke up when you were 20, it was so long ago and now it’s just a last memory to him. He hasn’t seen you in six years and the only time he ever wastes time thinking about you is when you’re brought up. He’s managed to push you so far back in his head that he’s only reminded of you when someone else mentions you and every time it happens, it hurts a little more.
Taehyung has this problem with revisiting the past anytime he’s drunk and since he met him at the same time that he met Y/n… it’s no surprise that some of those early memories had you in them. He never failed to remind Jungkook that he had felt like a child with divorced parents having to choose a side when you two broke up. Time and time again Jungkook reminds him that he could’ve gone off and been best friends with you if that’s what he really wanted but then it would end in an argument over the friendship.
Jungkook reached into the pocket of his black jeans for his pack of cigarettes and offered one to Taehyung, “So tell me about this friend.”
“She’s blonde—natural or not, I’m not sure—but she’s attractive and nice. She seems a bit extroverted, kinda bubbly so I don’t know how you’ll feel about that but I’m telling you… you’ll like her,” Taehyung said, happy to drop the current topic to go back to the original point in conversation.
He tried to listen to his friend’s description of this woman he wanted Jungkook to meet but he couldn’t. It was really all Taehyung’s fault for making him think about you and all his past relationships. He’ll admit, he’s been in quite a few and none have lasted more than a few months aside from the one with you. It was normal for yours to be the one that left the biggest impact on him but he wouldn’t say that’s why he stays away from relationships.
There might be a time here and there where Jungkook does indulge in carnal desires and sleeps with someone but they’re never anything more than that.
He’s got too much shit going on to waste time dating someone.
After a long night of hearing his friend go on and on about a woman he thinks is good for him, he returned to his loft apartment tired and alone. Like his shop, his apartment had the same cool tone to it. The walls were black and some brick, blue lights were tucked away in corners angling up toward photographic portraits he’s done in the last few years and his black 1968 Gibson Custom Les Paul Electric guitar hanging proudly in his living room. His Doberman leapt happily at the sight of his owner and he followed after Jungkook as he stepped onto his couch taking the guitar off its hooks to examine it.
To be honest, he rarely plays the guitar nowadays and it’s not because he forgot how to play or because he lost his love for it but it’s not the same anymore. Now it just sits as a reminder of who he was with when he got it and just how he got it. As if this guitar wasn’t a constant reminder of you, his dear friend felt the need to bring you up too.
It wasn’t Taehyung’s fault things happened the way they did and it’s not his fault that it fell apart for him too but… sometimes he wonders if things would have been different if Taehyung didn’t push him to date you all those years back.
For days on end all you could do was think about that stupid box. It didn’t help that you had no room for it so it remained in your living room taunting you, pressing you to play just one more video. It’s strange how you hadn’t thought about this box or Jungkook in a long time and now he’s randomly showing back up in your life without even knowing it. Honestly, it was embarrassing.
You’ve randomly begun to think about a guy you dumped when you were 20 years old and for some reason that’s starting to get to you. It was making you anxious like all of a sudden you’ve realized how much time has passed. If it wasn’t for moving out of your old apartment, you wouldn’t have even thought about this but not that you’re looking back… this was supposed to be that ending.
You were supposed to leave it all behind when you moved and instead you brought it with you to your new beginning.
“Y/n.” The man across from you called your name as you stared off in the distance. He released a small sigh, “Come on kid, you wanted to get lunch, what’s up?”
“I’m not a kid,” you told Yoongi with a glare in your eyes, “And maybe I just wanted to catch up with an old friend of mine.”
Yoongi lifted an unamused brow, “Are you calling me old or our friendship old?”
“A little bit of both,” you said with a teasing smile, taking a sip from your drink as the two of you waited for your food, “But anyway, no, I haven’t seen you in like a month and I kinda missed you.”
“Right…” Yoongi looked away, “So what have you been up to? How’s the new apartment?”
You released a sigh as Yoongi began to ask you things and tried sorting your answers in your head, “I’ve been too busy moving but the apartment is nice, a little less space than I originally thought but nothing I can’t manage.”
“And how’s the magazine?” Yoongi asked, taking a short pause to thank the server who brought your plates out, “Did you get that promotion?”
“Yes!” Your eyes widened and a smile came to your face, “I did, we’re still working on transfers but you’re looking at the new Editorial Assistant.”
“Soon to be new Editor,” Yoongi said proudly, “I can’t believe I’ve seen you grow from some emo kid who used to work for me to an adult on their way to their dream job.”
“I know,” you released a sigh at the thought of how far you’ve come. When you graduated high school you worked at a streetwear shop and you stayed there part time when you started college. It’s gotta be the best place you’ve ever worked at and the environment was always laid back. Yoongi was the one to push you and ask what you wanted to be and when you told him your plan to work at a magazine he was always right there beside you. Now at 26, you’re just a step away from Editor. It’s crazy how much can change in six years and that alone made you ask, “I know this is random but do you still talk to old employees?”
Yoongi’s brows furrowed, “I talk to you.”
“I mean beside me,” you said with a roll of your eyes as you poured yourself more water in your glass. You wanted to say this was all just out of curiosity considering he’s the one who brought up the time you worked for him but in reality… you planned on asking him this when he agreed to lunch.
“Mm, not really. I talked to Taehyung for a while after he quit but it didn’t last long,” Yoongi said as casually as ever and he looked at you with curious eyes. Your lip was pulled between your teeth and you were no longer eating, just using your silverware to play with your food and he knew you well enough to know his answer didn’t satiate your curiosity. He purposely left out any mention of him but maybe that’s what you were looking for? “I haven’t talked to Jungkook since he moved—but last I heard he came back a couple years ago and opened up a store.”
“Store?” You asked, watching your friend’s eyes widen in surprise.
“Yeah, he, y’know he opened a camera store, a couple second hand guitars too,” Yoongi said, “You didn’t know?”
You shook your head no, “When?”
“I don’t know, when he came back? Jin told me he had seen him around but I never talked to him. We didn’t keep in touch when he went back to Busan so I figured it would be weird to want to know what he’s up to now, right?” Yoongi said, unaware of the way you had tuned him out, lost in thought.
Talking about Jungkook to Yoongi felt strange because he knew the two of you in a different way than Somin did. Somin knew Jungkook because of you but you and him worked for Yoongi for two years. It’s like with Taehyung, he met you the same time he met Jungkook but the two grew closer even when you fell out. Your breakup with Jungkook was a bit of a tricky subject and you’ll take the blame for it. Back then you might’ve tried and argued that it was a mutual agreement but now that you’re older you’ll admit you were in the wrong, or maybe the things you said were wrong.
“Y/n,” Yoongi called your name, snapping your out of your state of daydream and caught your attention, “Have you really not spoken to him since the breakup? I don't remember it being that bad.”
You shrugged, “Honestly I can’t remember, a lot happened that I didn’t say and I’m sure he didn’t either so it makes sense.”
“What’s wrong?” He asked, “I can tell something is on your mind, why’d you ask who I kept in touch with? Have you been trying to contact Jungkook?”
“No,” you nearly choked on your drink, “No, I just, um, I was just curious.”
Yoongi didn’t press you for more, he could see it on your face that there was more you weren’t telling him but he didn’t want to force you to come out with it. You ended your little lunch date with plans to meet up again and went back to your respective jobs.
It wasn’t until nighttime that you found yourself thinking back to that stupid fucking box that just grabbed your attention everytime you were home. If Jimin had never wanted to play the first tape then maybe you wouldn’t have been so stuck on them but you just can’t help it anymore. They’re all you’ve been able to think about which has led you to think about Jungkook. You have not questioned him or his whereabouts in so long and this sudden interest in how he’s doing is starting to get to you.
When you got home you tried distracting yourself from them. You still had to figure out where to put them if you even want to keep them and although you think you shouldn’t… you can’t just throw them away either. It’s a memory, a cute little memory if you only watch the first few videos and you’ve moved on so they shouldn’t bother you anymore—they don’t bother you anymore. You spent part of your night finishing up a project from work, drinking a glass of wine and listening to Bloodhail by Have a Nice Life, only looking at the box every now and then.
You always preferred working in your living room because it helped you resist the urge to lay in bed but right now you can’t focus on your project and you can’t take it anymore. You took a tape out of the box and put it into Somin’s tape player, turned on the tv and the volume up just a bit as the video began to play.
․ ∘ ⊹ ✰ ┆ JJK 2 : THE SKATEPARK┆ ✰ ⊹ ∘ .
The sky was dark and you doubted anything could be seen on the camera set up beside you but neither of you seemed to care. The camera had been rolling since the store was open and you had been filming with him since but you never expected Jungkook would ask you out. Could you call this a date?
“Y/n,” Jungkook’s voice was calm and collected over the loud rock music that played in the skate park, “I’ll pull, all you have to do is try and balance.”
“I am trying,” you took a deep breath staring down at the skateboard underneath your worn out converse, “Just give me a second, alright?”
Jungkook just smiled, he took a cautious step back when you released his hands and he picked up his camera trying to make sure you were in view. Things have begun to change between you two drastically. Sure, you always did a back and forth flirting at work but lately it feels a bit more than that. You’ve been messaging every night talking about random things, sometimes talking about more meaningful things. Whenever he was near you his touch always seemed to linger and now he’s asked you out tonight—nothing serious… just feeling it out.
“Okay, okay, wait I think I got it,” you waved a hand excitedly as you called him back over. He didn’t hesitate to take your hand in his free one and aimed the camera down at your feet. He began to pull you forward, feeling your fingers lock with his when you nearly lost balance.
Jungkook was walking backwards as he helped you skate across the cement, not watching where he was going until he bumped into a ramp nearly yanking you off the board. The camera fumbled in his hand as he tried to save you instead and wrapped an arm around your waist to keep you steady. You clung to his arm, heart racing from the near fall and yet you couldn’t help but laugh as you fumbled to keep the camera safe. Since you met him you realize he had a strong tie with his camcorder and got used to his need to always be recording, you found it cute so you didn’t want something to happen to it.
He was hesitant to let you go even when you stood up comfortably, tucking your hair behind your pierced ears and biting your lip, “I need a break.”
Jungkook didn’t question it as he followed you to sit down on a grassy hill just outside the cement confines of the skatepark. He reached into his black Jansport backpack and took out a bottled water to hand to you. You smiled, taking it with a thank you and asked, “So do you come here every night you close?”
“Sometimes,” Jungkook shrugged, watching you tip your head back to drink from his water bottle, a small droplet slipping down your chin that had him reaching out a thumb to wipe, “Helps clear my head.”
“That’s nice,” you said softly thanking him, cheeks flush red, handing him back the water and watching him take a drink next, “Is that why you’re always recording too?”
Jungkook looked down at his silver camcorder that sat in the middle on the grass, “I don’t know, I find it relaxing but at the same time… it makes me anxious? I want to capture everything I experience on video because I’m scared that one day I’m not going to remember any of this. Sometimes I wonder if I’m missing out on the moment itself but then I think about right now an—no, nevermind.”
Your brows furrowed as he stared down at the people skating, eyes narrowing as he listened to the next song someone played. It was late and that definitely wasn’t a skating song but it was one of his favorites and he had to say it, “I like this song.”
Bloodhail played somewhere off in the distance and he softly hummed to the beat but you were too focused on what he never finished saying instead, “What were you going to say?”
Jungkook played with his lip ring, the beating red light from his camera recording in his peripheral as he shrugged, “It’s nothing.” There was a small pile of loose grass blades he’s pulled from the ground next to him.
He looked at you to see what you had to say but instead you just stayed silent, slightly drawn back from him and he didn’t want that. It’s not like what he was going to say was bad but… the two of you have only ever flirted. What if he said something that pushed you away? But what if he chose not to ever speak up and you got tired of waiting?
The song really was one of his favorites but he’ll admit he used that as a distraction to change the subject but he couldn’t just not answer now.
“I think about what would happen if I didn’t have my camera when I’m with you,” Jungkook confessed, laying on his bed to look up at the stars, “Would I remember everything you said? What jokes I said that made you laugh? Or even the way you looked at me? I wouldn’t want to forget these things.”
All that was heard for a good long moment was the sound of the music and muffled noises from people still around. He felt his stomach tighten, shaking his head in the grass, “Shit, sorry, that probably sounded weird.”
Your eyes met and for a second he forgot where the two of you were or that his camera was still recording at a bad angle, “What will you do when you’re done filming us?”
“Give the tapes to you, maybe keep a couple,” Jungkook answered truthfully, “They’re as much yours as they are mine.”
“But you’re the one always recording,” you told him but he just shrugged.
“Because I like it and I like you and I just want to capture every moment we have,” his words sounded more confident now as he sat up not wanting to beat around the bus anymore, “So, Y/n, will you go out with me?”
․ ∘ ⊹ ✰ ┆ THE END ┆ ✰ ⊹ ∘ .
A chill ran down your spine as the song you currently listened to matched the one that had played in a video that was seven or eight years old. As much as you’ve told yourself you’ve changed your music taste has stayed the same and the strange serenity you felt in the beginning with Jungkook never changed either.
Why were you missing him?
It was another late night at the studio, Jungkook spent more time there than at his apartment lately and tonight was no different. Although he did have plans with Taehyung and that blonde he had been telling him about, he’s not sure if he’s interested in actually going. He met her a couple nights ago and Taehyung was right, she’s great, honestly, but something didn’t click right away.
If he met up with Taehyung for this ‘double date’ that might give her the wrong idea and he doesn’t want to hurt her. If he could have her as a friend that would be best. He’s just not ready to give himself to someone when his last break up ended because of something so stupid that he just couldn’t let go.
Jungkook stood outside under a poorly lit street lamp just outside his studio as he smoked a cigarette, taking a small break from photo developing. His studio was located on a quiet street uphill, it had a simple cinderblock look and it wasn’t big but it was somewhat popular. People liked to see his photographs and he would do photoshoots, sell cameras, fix them, he did pretty much anything you could do with a camera. Business might be slow at times but it was peaceful and he made a living wage off doing something that he loved, that’s all he had ever wanted. He was content with where he is now at only 26 and his own business. He didn’t mind being single nor did he care to change that… so he decided he was going to miss out on tonight.
Once he finished his short smoking break, he put the bud out on the floor with his shoe and picked it up to dump in the trash. Just as Jungkook turned back to the door of his studio, he seemed to go still.
For a second he debated rubbing his fists into his eyes in hopes of washing away this mirage but all he managed to do was blink, speechless and frozen. You weren’t better off despite being the reason he was stuck like that and all you could do was stare at him in disbelief.
It was very obviously Jungkook, there was no mistaking it but it also looked like someone completely different in a sense. The Jungkook you dated always dressed in band tees too small for him, spiked chokers, checkered belts, the full emo scene of the time minus the side swept hair—he preferred the longish curls instead. He had a lip piercing and a belly button piercing but that was it. Now you’re looking at him and you’re seeing a man after six years realizing just how much time had passed. He had a tattoo sleeve and small gages, a lip piercing and he wore overly baggy black clothes. His hair was short and straight but it looked good on him and you can’t believe you’re admitting that to yourself right now.
“Is this JeonStudio?” You asked as calmly as you could but your voice still betrayed you at the end. You avoided his gaze, choosing instead to eye the small building somewhat proudly and awkward too. Coming here was on a whim, you had been out with friends when you got curious and searched him up. Yoongi had told you he owned a shop so it wasn’t hard to find and honestly… you didn’t expect to go in and actually see him. Imagine your surprise when he caught you standing outside slightly tipsy? “I don’t suppose you’re open at this hour.”
Jungkook just looked at you, heart racing and half tempted to smoke another cigarette due to growing anxiety but you seemed so casual and he didn’t want to overreact. It’s been too long anyway, he’s dumbfounded. He cleared his throat uncomfortably before walking to the door, not bothering to look back at you as he held it open for you to go in.
Immediately you winced at the loudness of the rock song that played, ears nearly sore from the volume as you stepped into the dark studio. Korn’s ‘Coming Undone’ played loudly as it reared its end and Jungkook left you alone for a moment to lower it back down, skipping the song in favor of listening to something by Alice In Chains. You’ll like to correct yourself; Jungkook might look slightly different because he’s older—but he still seems like the exact guy you left six years ago.
“So what can I do for you?” Jungkook’s voice sounded deeper, more manly and when he stood behind his glass counter of cameras with his hands leaning against it, silver rings on his tattooed fingers and a slight smell of nicotine, you were brought back to before. He let his gaze travel over you in half surprise and half amazement.
Just seeing you after having you stuck in his head for a couple weeks now was a surprise, but to see how you’ve changed? He was amazed. It’s not that you were a completely different person but… wow you’ve grown. You no longer wore your ripped fishnets or beaten Converse and Dr. Martens. Your hair wasn’t in knots and your makeup wasn’t smudged or messy like you did it in the back of a bus on your way to work.
You looked… you looked good, like a matured version of yourself who wasn’t shy to show small hints at what you used to be like.
“I just…” you trailed off looking around the room, “I heard you had your own shop an—“
“And?” Jungkook asked with a firm expression making you look back at him, “I’ve had it for a couple years now, why the sudden interest, Y/n?”
He acted cold and it was a bit of a surprise and you scolded yourself for thinking that. It’s not like you expected him to be all smiles seeing you again. God, why did you come? It felt like one second you’re leaving your friend’s movie night to go home and next you’re standing outside of his studio as he smokes.
Maybe you’ll just leave before you do anything embarrassing.
Jungkook watched you with a blank expression but he would be lying if he said his heart wasn’t racing as he watched you look around. He stood behind the glass case of cameras where the register was at and waited for you to say something.
The changes were subtle but there was no way he could miss them. The biggest was of course your fashion style now, it was different yet he could still pick up hints of how you used to dress. You still preferred black shoes and silver jewelry. Your hair was styled differently now but it still suited you perfectly, you still had your nose pierced and your nails painted.
Something that didn’t change was that familiar sparkle in your eyes when you were curious and right now he could see it as you did a 360 of his studio. He didn’t notice the way his finger began to tap anxiously against the glass waiting to see what you would say about it. He wasn’t looking to impress you or anything but…
“All of these are yours?” You asked as you stepped closer to a portrait on the wall with blue and black hues. Your gaze never shifted away from the portrait so he was forced to give you a verbal response, “Most, some are Taehyung’s.”
At the mention of your old friend you seemed to freeze up a little, “How is he?”
Jungkook couldn’t hold back a scoff as he crossed his arms over his chest, “He’s great, thanks for asking, don’t you want to ask how I am?”
Once again his slight attitude caught you off guard but you weren’t going to let it bring you down, you’ve come this far in your reconciliation. Your eyes narrowed as they met his glare and you rebutted, “I was getting there, jeez.”
This time around it was his turn to be surprised when you rolled your eyes and he hated that the corner of his lips threatened to turn upward in amusement. You finally quit looking at everything but him and turned in his direction like you were finally going to say something only for you to look up in search of the speakers that played a song you remembered he liked. Pink Maggit by Deftones started off slow and quietly but slowly raised volume that Jungkook had to lower it down a little more. He pretended not to notice his ringing phone that buzzed on the counter with Taehyung’s name displayed—probably wondering where he was.
“I don’t know if this holds meaning but I love this place,” you said and a shaky breath he hadn’t realized he was holding slipped out.
“Thanks,” Jungkook said with a huff.
“Seriously Jungkook,” you stood in front of the counter now, “It’s like everything you’ve ever wanted.”
“It is,” he agreed, studying you and falling silent.
The longer he stayed thinking the harder it became to hold himself back and this time, more gentle and calm, he asked, “Y/n, why are you here?”
His phone lit up once more and he flipped it to face down and waited for you to respond. You were quiet for a moment as you tried gathering your thoughts and in the end you found yourself sitting alone in his studio with him confessing about the tapes.
There was a slight tension in the air that seemed to blur out the background noise of the restaurant’s chaos. He felt it but he pretended like he didn’t as he looked at his menu, not sure what to order or if he was even hungry.
“Yuna thinks you’re not interested,” was one of the first things Taehyung said to him as the two met up for dinner one night. Jungkook had already expected his friend to have something to say about the other night when he ditched their plans because something unexpected happened but… but he hadn’t processed what Taehyung had said until it was too late.
“Who?” Jungkook asked absentmindedly, unaware of the glare Taehyung sent him that had him snapping back into realization, “Oh… Oh! Yuna? Yeah, sorry about that.”
“I mean it’s whatever to me but the two of you were really hitting it off,” Taehyung said with a shrug that had Jungkook rolling his eyes.
“Come on, we’ve met once and I was drunk,” Jungkook said, “She’s cute but… I don’t know.”
He ignored the way Taehyung’s eyes seemed to narrow suspiciously, “You don’t know? You seemed to be pretty good talking to her over drinks and now you don’t know? What made you ditch out on me anyway?”
Jungkook cleared his throat awkwardly, “Something came up—“
“No!” Taehyung groaned, “Don’t give me that bullshit. What was it?”
There was a slight pause in the conversation as the server came to take their orders but Taehyung just ushered them away to come back later. Jungkook ran his fingers through his hair, seeming exhausted before saying, “Nothing, honestly, just…”
“Just?”
“Y/n came to the studio.”
Silence filled the space between the two again as Taehyung stared at him dumbfounded. Jungkook couldn’t even think of anything to respond with either so they just sat there feeling the tension grow thicker by the second. After a while, Taehyung released a nervous chuckle and sighed, “Alright, for a second I thought you were being serious. Come up with a better excuse ne—“
“I’m being serious,” Jungkook said and Taehyung was finally able to see the small difference in his friend. His hair was a bit messier and he looked tired but he didn’t look bad he just looked different. “I was working late and you were blowing up my phone to get me to meet up with you guys but there I am smoking a stupid cigarette and she’s standing there like nothing ever happened asking if it’s open!”
“Shit,” Taehyung listened, “So what happened? That’s it? Did you talk? What did you talk about?”
“She asked about you,” Jungkook said with a roll of his eyes, “Then worried about me later but, she still had the tapes.”
“What tapes?”
“The tapes,” Jungkook didn’t care to clarify because his friend should know exactly what he is talking about. It took Taehyung a moment but realization dawned on him and he gasped, “All of the movies you made with her?”
“Yes,” Jungkook said, “I-I had forgotten all about them, honestly but then she comes along telling me she was moving and a friend of hers found them and they made her curious a—fuck, it’s so weird seeing her again.”
“Did Y/n change?” Taehyung asked, watching Jungkook nod his head. Jungkook really did look exhausted like he’s been thinking about this nonstop.
“So much but like… at the same time, it’s still Y/n,” Jungkook said with a small hint of a smile, “She’s still got the same look in her eye and her smile is still the same. I don’t know, we talked about the tapes but that’s really it an—“
“So go talk to her, even if it’s just to catch up,” Taehyung tried saying, half expecting his friend to reject the idea the way he’s rejected anything that had to do with you so to hear that he ditched him because you showed up out of the blue… he wants to know what this means.
In truth, Taehyung cared a lot about you both despite not being friends with you anymore. The three of you met at an impressionable age in your young adult years so it’s hard for him to act like he didn’t care about you two. You would hang out at the skatepark, record stupid videos, do stupid things at work, and you had been one of his best friends. To even hear that you asked about him made him feel good because there’s been so many times when he’s debated just picking up the phone and calling you but never brought himself to do it.
“You think I should talk to Y/n?” Jungkook asked as the server came back once more to ask if they were ready yet but once again Taehyung asked for another minute. He nodded his head, “I think… the two of you didn’t end terribly and if she came to find you then it wouldn’t hurt to talk. I know that it’s been six years and you don’t care anymore [ you’ve said that so many times now ] but personally I would want to see the tapes.”
Jungkook’s leg began to bounce anxiously under the table as he gnawed on his lip ring in thought. “So I should see Y/n?”
“I think so,” Taehyung said with a small smirk, “Or do you really not care because it’s been six years?”
There was a mocking undertone in his voice that Jungkook chose to ignore as he suddenly rose to his feet making his decision abrupt. Taehyung didn’t even bother stopping him as he left him behind in the restaurant, he just found it amusing. When the server came back to check if they were still not ready, Taehyung apologized for wasting their time and left them a tip before leaving too.
It has been six years, that thought hasn’t slipped Jungkook’s mind yet but that’s why he’s so confused. It’s been so long and you dumped him so for you to reach back out to him suddenly telling him you still have the tapes… don’t you realize how that can mess with his head? He’s over you, you’re over him so why would you do that? He has to know and that’s why he called the number you gave him the other night and asked to meet up.
When he got to your apartment building he was a bit taken back by the size of it. Compared to the small shoebox the two of you lived together in once upon a time, this was big and spacious. The inside was honestly what he expected. There was a record player in the corner with some old vinyls he knew you had: Deftones’ Around the Fur, Nirvana’s In Utero, Flyleaf’s Flyleaf, etc. You had a couple dead houseplants in various shades of dark green but no flowers, you seemed to still like the color black and you liked your bands and horror movies. On your coffee table was an arrangement of magazines all from the same publication and a drawing board next to it.
“Do you want anything to drink?” You asked from the kitchen, nervous to see him looking around so curiously. It was strange to have him here at your new place after claiming you were leaving the past in the past. Clearly that had been a lie because you’re the reason he’s here right now, you’re the one who reached out to him so you have no right to feel weird about him calling you tonight.
“Just water,” Jungkook mumbled to himself as his eyes casted down on the rundown box that he had been trying oh-so-desperately to avoid. It was shut but not well and the tape player laid next to it connected to the TV. He was itching to go through the tapes but he was also scared of what he would find on them.
Instead, he walked over to your record player looking through the various vinyls to see if he could play one. You’ve had the same player for years, it’s one he bought with you so he was well used to it and for some reason, he didn’t hesitate to go to it and play something himself like he used to. He chose a Deftones album and ‘Sextape’ began to play just in time for you to come to him with a glass of water looking at him curiously.
“Sorry,” Jungkook said once he realized he had subconsciously done what he used to do anytime he came over to your place, “Force of habit?”
It was stupid that a habit he had six years ago was coming back to him but for some reason seeing you again was making him realize how much the two of you used to love each other. He doesn’t think he has feelings for you still but he did miss you and he’ll never deny that.
Okay, false, he denied it all the time to Taehyung but that was then. He thought he would never see you again and if he did it was just in passing and that you would barely acknowledge him but that’s not what happened and he couldn’t help but miss you. If only he knew you felt the same but he always struggled to read you.
“It’s alright,” you said, moving to sit on the couch with his glass on the table letting him come join you. He sat down with a foot or two of space in between and looked around making you smile. You didn’t mean to smile but he just seemed so curious and intrigued by everything in here and as he looked around you looked at him.
God, he looked different. Last time you didn’t get a good look at his tattoos but right now you’re taking them all in with interest. Back then he would go on and on about all the tattoos he would get and now that he has them, you’ll admit he looks so good. He seemed to be doing so well for himself and that made you feel happy to see him doing what he always wanted to do. The confidence just radiated off him when before he was always a bit more insecure.
Not even just in his future plans but his looks too and now you’re noticing how buff he’s gotten. His arms and shoulders were huge and he looked intimidating, you’re sure if the 18 year old Jungkook saw what he looked like now, he wouldn’t believe it.
“How many have you watched?” Jungkook finally asked in regards of the tapes and for a second you forgot that’s why he came and it wasn’t just to catch up.
“A few, not all of them though,” you confessed looking at the box, “Some are hard to watch.”
He didn’t need you to elaborate to know what you were talking about. Toward the end of your relationship, there wasn’t a time Jungkook wasn’t recording you too and unfortunately that meant he caught a few rough moments on video. He developed them on tapes because he didn’t want to waste them and when he had given them to you he was mad and wanted to be petty so he gave them all but now he wishes he didn’t.
He realizes now that he’s not mad about the past. You dumped him because you were going to school and Jungkook wanted to go back to Busan with no real plan for his future. You worked so well together but it was so obvious that you reached a point where you wanted different things and you’re the one who had the guts to end it. Of course at the time it destroyed him but now that he’s grown from it, he can’t be mad anymore.
“Do you want me to play one?” You asked once he fell silent for too long. Jungkook bit his lip nervously before nodding his head shyly. You left his side to go set everything up and he just watched you feeling anxious. He hasn’t seen these tapes in six years and he’s not sure what to expect.
․ ∘ ⊹ ✰ ┆ JJK 21: THE ARGUMENT ┆ ✰ ⊹ ∘ .
The video started with a view of a snake terrarium in your old bedroom. It belonged to Jungkook but when he moved in with you, he brought it with and it stayed. It was red and warm with a small snake hiding in its cave but it was pretty and the two of you used to pass time staring at it with curiosity. There was a soft rock song playing in the background but it was muffled by your voices.
In truth, Jungkook had forgotten he was recording.
“So you’re going back to Busan?” Your voice was a bit groggy and low like you were scared to raise your voice too much. It was late and the two of you had spent most of your time at some manga store after work and have just now gotten home. You’ve been quiet since you had dinner and this is the first thing you’ve said to him since.
Jungkook was in a small Korn band tee that didn’t cover his full waist and showed a bit of his belly button piercing but he never really cared how his clothes fit him. His black jeans were always baggy and torn and his beanies always flattened his hair. He used to have a certain look that drew everyone’s attention even when he didn’t want it.
“Come with me,” Jungkook said in his deep tone, “I know it’s sudden, Y/n, but I don’t want to leave you, I don’t care if it’s not that far.”
“So why leave at all?” You asked, sitting down on bed avoiding his gaze, “You can do whatever you want here, why do you want to go back?”
Jungkook stayed quiet for a moment as he thought about it, “I don’t know, I don’t feel at home.”
You didn’t say anything as you sat on the edge of the bed staring at the wall to avoid looking at him. He hasn’t forgotten that you haven’t answered him yet, “Come with me.”
“I don’t know,” you admitted after some time contemplating, “What would we do?”
“We can stay with my brother for a while, find a job and start working,” Jungkook offered excitedly as he dropped down to his knees in front of you, making sure your attention was on him and not the ground, “We’ll find a place together.”
“What about school?” You asked. You’ve got about a year left, if that, and you can’t just move somewhere else and register all over again. You’ve got internships lined up and the right connections here. You have plans.
Jungkook’s brows furrowed, “You can transfer, it’s not hard, right? Just think about it Y/n, just you and me. We don’t have to worry about your family or anything else.”
“I can’t.”
For a second he wondered if you said anything at all because it was so quiet but when you looked up at him apologetically, he asked, “Why not?”
“I can’t just pick up everything and leave with you Jungkook,” you told him, slightly bothered by the fact that he didn’t understand that, “I’ve got plans that don’t involve me moving to Busan with a boy I’ve dated for a little over a year and who I probably won’t even be with for long.”
“What?” His face hardened as he listened to you, “You don’t want to be with me?”
“I didn’t say that,” you sighed, “I’m sorry, that’s not how I meant it, I just…”
“Just what, Y/n? Because last night we were talking about spending forever together and now you’re saying we won’t be together for long?” Jungkook said with a scoff as he stood up, his camera completely pushed to the back of his mind.
You ran your hand over your face with worry, “That was before you told me you want to move back to Busan,” you said honestly, “I don’t want to go anywhere, if you want to go and start over somewhere else then do it but you can’t just ask me to change everything I’ve had planned just so I could follow you. You don’t even have a real plan to go back. It might not feel like home to you here, Jungkook, but it does for me and it’s not fair that you can just ask me to pack up and leave when we’ve got nothing going on.”
“We have each other,” Jungkook’s voice was softer because he sounded hurt, “Isn't that enough?”
“For you, maybe, but not for me,” you argued coldly, “I can’t change my life for you.”
Jungkook stood there seemingly frozen as you got up from the bed, pushing past him and locking yourself in the bathroom away from him. He wasn’t sure what to think right now other than this was the first argument the two of you have ever had. It was an argument, right?
What even happened? You had spent such an amazing day together, he picked you up after your last class and you went out to eat. You went to a park where he played a song for you on the guitar you bought him and the two of you had been laughing all day. It felt so sweet until the moment he mentioned Busan and suddenly you had grown distant.
Suddenly you were saying the two of you wouldn’t last, is that true?
“Y/n?” You could hear Jungkook call for you with a small knock on the door, “Babe, can we talk?”
“I don’t want to,” you sniffled, “I just want to be alone right now.”
Jungkook pulled away from the door feeling dejected and blown off. He ran his fingers through his messy hair anxiously and looked around your shared bedroom for his things. He’ll just give you time to yourself and maybe later you could think things through again.
As he looked for his phone and keys, his eyes landed on the camcorder that captured the moment his snake left its cafe to curl up against a small log. He picked the camera up curiously, eyes widening as he saw it was recording.
․ ∘ ⊹ ✰ ┆ THE END ┆ ✰ ⊹ ∘ .
Jungkook sat there as still as ever, staring at the screen with glossy eyes as he watched the frozen image of himself pick up his camera—realizing he left it on. He looked down at his glass of water, feeling his throat become dry as he brought it to his lips, hand shaking.
Although it was six years ago and he had not thought about it once… seeing this video just brought him back to that day. It wasn’t the only argument the two of you had but he must’ve learned his lesson and kept the camera off. Later on the two of you argued and you said some hurtful things to him that you later apologized for but it didn’t make him feel any different.
That was the moment he realized maybe the relationship really would not have lasted long.
“Jungkook,” your voice was so soft now, slightly deeper and more mature but anytime you said his name it made his head spin nonetheless like he still couldn’t believe it.
When he looked up at you, you’re not sure what you had expected but it definitely wasn’t the sight of his reddened eyes as he took jagged breaths trying to calm his racing heart.
It’s just… back then he had been struck with such limerence that all he could think about was the two of you together anyway it could be. Sometimes it didn’t even matter if you weren’t sexually intimate, just knowing someone loved him and wanted him was enough and when you broke up with him… it hurt. It hurt really fucking bad and this video reminded him a bit of how that felt.
“I kept some tapes too,” he finally admitted, clearing his throat and changing the subject in hopes that you wouldn’t see how he was feeling. He circled the rim of his glass with his index finger as he looked down at his lap to avoid your soft gaze. A smile came to his face as he scoffed, “Um, this is kinda embarrassing to admit but… the last person I dated dumped me because I wouldn’t throw them away.”
“Because of the memories?” You asked quietly and he nodded. That’s how Jungkook was, once he told you how he never wanted to forget anything no matter how it made him feel and in this case he wanted to remember you no matter what happened and in a sense you had been the same. You wanted to keep the tapes because being with him had felt like home to you and you never wanted to leave it behind even if you said you were over it.
Watching them again was making you realize how much you needed Jungkook at the time and how much he had needed you. Maybe you still need him and it took you this long to admit that, knowing he couldn’t let you go either was like a slap in the face after the things you said to him.
The amount of times you argued that you had a future planned that didn’t need him in it only because you were heading toward different directions in life. Where Jungkook was more laidback, you were uptight and that had not been a good mix then. You told him you couldn’t just sit around in Busan and only have what the two of you had to rely on because one day he might decide he doesn’t need you anymore and throw you away after you changed your life for him. In the end, things happened in reverse and you wish you could just take it all back.
“Y/n—“
Jungkook went quiet as the soft buzz of a phone ringing cut him off and he was thankful. He didn’t even know what he planned on telling you and that scared him. Would he tell you that he missed you or that he thinks it would be best to never speak again?
You both looked down at your phone screen as it sat on the coffee table with a picture of you and Jimin smiling happily as he called. Your gaze shifted to Jungkook, “What were you going to say?”
The call came to an end and your attention was on him but he didn’t want to speak anymore and before he could tell you it didn’t matter, this stranger called again. He cleared his throat, “Um, you should answer that, it’s late anyway and we’ve both got work tomorrow. If you ever want to talk again… maybe we can, you have my number but I should go.
Your brows furrowed, shaking your head no as he set the glass down next to your ringing phone and stood up suddenly, “Jungkook, wai—“
He didn’t stop till he was out the door running his fingers through his hair, feeling exhausted and unsure of himself.
Watching that video reminded him that the two of you broke up for a reason and it had been valid at the time. It has been the right decision too even if it hurt and although it felt like a ‘Right Person Wrong Time’ moment, there’s nothing to do now and there’s no point in dwelling on the past.
He’s moved on.
Just as you debated following him out, your phone rang once more and with a dejected sigh, you answered, “What do you want?!”
“Whoa, chill on the attitude I’ve been trying to get you to answer because I have a serious question,” Jimin said on the other end of the line. Your face softened as you grew curious and worried “What is it?”
“Am I a gold or silver jewelry type of guy?” Jimin asked as he held up two matching bracelets in thought. You went quiet on your end and he raised a curious brow only to wince at the second your voice rose a couple octaves.
“Are you fucking serious right now?” You groaned, throwing yourself back on your couch annoyed that Jungkook left in such a hurry because Jimin had been blowing up your phone.
“Dead serious.”
Click.
“Hello?” Jimin spoke to himself hearing the line end, “Did you hang up on me?”
The end of the week came quicker than you had expected and yet time felt to slow down for you too. Ever since Jungkook came to your apartment and watched that video with you, you haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. The look in his eyes had captured your attention more than the video had but when he left without finishing what he was going to say… that’s when you got caught up. He used to always do that to you, he would start to say something and then try and push it away so he should know by now that you would think about it.
You just can’t help but wonder what he was going to say and it’s been eating at you for days.
“Y/n, can you pretend to listen to me?” Jimin asked as he bumped his wine glass again at yours to get your attention.
“What?” You asked looking up at your two friends who stared at you with confusion, “Sorry.”
Somin’s brows furrowed, “What’s up with you? You haven’t even touched your food.”
Your plate sat there barely eaten while theirs had been cleared out. You seemed to have forgotten where you were and it wasn’t until now that you looked around to see the three of you were still sitting in a dimly lit booth having an extremely late dinner on a Saturday night.
“Nothing, I’ve just been… y'know,” you shrugged, lifting up your silverware in hopes of finding the motivation to finish your meal. You bit your lip anxiously, your friends watching you made you nervous and it was very apparent. You haven’t told them about seeing Jungkook again but you’re not sure what they would make of it and that’s the only thing that has stopped you. You’re not sure what you even make of it, much less what they would think but you’re starting to realize maybe you need a second opinion.
“I met with Jungkook,” you finally said and despite the loudness of the restaurant, your table seemed to fall silent as they both looked at you.
“When?”
“Well, the first time, a couple weeks ago,” you said honestly, “The last time… two nights ago.”
They shared a look with each other that you had no desire to learn the meaning of before Jimin asked, “This is the ex boyfriend, right? The VCR tapes boyfriend?”
“That’s the one,” you said awkwardly, “We watched a tape the other night, it wasn’t a good one but… I don’t know.”
“You mean you invited him over?” Somin asked, making you shake your head no and she continued, “He just showed up? So did he find you first?”
“Nope, I looked for him,” you told them, hiding your face in your hands, “I’m so stupid. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Why?” Jimin asked, “Did you two argue?”
“No,” you told him, “No, we didn’t… it’s just…”
“It’s just now you can’t stop thinking about him,” Somin said instead of asked and you nodded your head yes. She released a sigh, “It’s been six years, Y/n.”
“I know,” you groaned letting your head fall into your hands further, “That’s why I’m so confused.”
“But was he mad or anything?” Jimin asked.
“No.”
“Then why don’t you try and talk to him?” He went on making you look at him.
“And tell him what?”
“That maybe you should start over—“
“No!” Somin said, “No, it’s been too long. Do you honestly think Jungkook would want that? All they did was talk, it just doesn’t make sense. It’s not like he's been waiting six years to hear from Y/n.”
You had to agree with her, you have no idea what Jungkook thinks about all this if he even does.
Not far from where you were with your friends was a packed street filled with nightlife and club goers all getting into their Saturday night and he was amongst them. He rarely chooses to come out for drinks and loud music unless it’s with his friends and this time was no different. After spending the past forty eight hours practically shut in his shop, Taehyung finally got him to come out to meet with the girls from last time.
Although he had sworn off meeting with Yuna again so he wouldn’t lead her on… he found himself doing it anyway. He just needed a distraction, you’re all he’s been able to think about and it wasn’t good for him. He couldn’t think about you like this.
You were his ex-girlfriend from so long ago and though meeting with you reminded him little by little of how well you used to be together… he can’t get over the fact that you left him. You left him when he needed you and that should have been the end of it. That had been the end of it. He had gone to Busan and you went your own way, when he came back to Seoul he only thought about you every now and then like when Taehyung would bring you up… or when he would remember the tapes… or listen to Deftones… or look at the guitar you gave him…
Maybe he did think about you frequently but not as frequent as this and he didn’t like it. You’ve been a constant in his mind since he first saw you standing under a street lamp not far from him asking if his studio was open. You’ve been a constant in his mind since he first ever met you too and it’s not fair that after you left him you get to come back and try to reconcile as friends.
“Want a smoke?” Taehyung asked his friend after he realized Jungkook had gone quiet for too long even when Yuna tried to ask him things. He didn’t give a verbal response, only nodded his head and began walking out of the packed club in hopes of more room to breathe.
Taehyung didn’t hesitate to reach into his pack of cigarettes and hand one to Jungkook watching his friend take it gladly and search his pockets for a lighter. He lit the end and did the same for Taehyung, looking up at the sky and attempting to tune out the loudness of the club behind him.
“So what’s up?” Taehyung asked, “You agreed to come out tonight but you seem out of it. Yuna’s been asking you questions nonstop and you’ve barely batted an eye at her.”
“I don’t know,” Jungkook took a drag of the cigarette, blowing it out shortly after with a shrug of his shoulders, “I’ll tell her I’m not feeling good or something.”
Taehyung didn’t say anything for a moment as he studied his best friend, finally asking, “Did you end up seeing Y/n?”
When Jungkook didn’t immediately react, Taehyung knew the answer. He flicked ash off the end of his cigarette and asked, “The night we had dinner?”
“Yeah,” Jungkook said, avoiding his friend’s gaze, “She didn’t ask about you this time, sorry.”
Taehyung just shrugged, knowing his friend was trying to lighten the growing tension but he didn’t care. He asked, “So then what did you talk about?”
“Not much,” Jungkook cleared his throat, a cloud of smoke covering his vision for a moment as he moved to the side to let a group of drunks through, “We watched one of the tapes though.”
“Which one?”
“It was an argument. I think it was when I first brought up Busan,” Jungkook admitted, kicking a rock with the tip of his black combat boot.
Taehyung nodded understandingly, “That’s it?”
“Pretty much, I left because some guy kept calling her,” Jungkook said, “I wasn’t sure if it was her boyfriend or not.”
Taehyung released a scoff, “You couldn’t have asked?”
“Why would it matter to me if it was?” Jungkook asked, “We’re exes for a reason, right?”
“And what was the reason, Jungkook?” Taehyung asked with a slightly harsher tone at his friend’s nonchalance, “Because you wanted her to follow you somewhere new and she didn’t want to. You’re back now, there’s no reason to not talk anymore so why didn’t you ask?”
“It won’t change anything,” Jungkook argued, annoyed by his friend’s need to always make him think about you when he didn’t want to, “So why bother?”
“Because it’s Y/n!” Taehyung said, “I get it, I really do. It’s been so long since you dated and it might not mean shit now but it did then and that’s never going to change no matter how hard you try and lie to yourself about it. And if it really didn’t matter anymore then you wouldn’t be out here tonight trying to forget seeing her again.”
“I went to see her because you told me to,” Jungkook said through gritted teeth.
“No,” Taehyung scoffed, “You went to see her because you wanted to, I just gave you the final push.”
“Nothing’s going to change thinking about her,” Jungkook said, “She’s a new person, so am I.”
“But on the inside you’re both still those same kids who ran away from home only to find it in each other again,” Taehyung said with a softer tone, “Come on man, I hate this sappy shit but open your eyes and realize that your home has always been with Y/n, that’s why you came back.”
“You’re wrong,” Jungkook glared at the ground, a lump forming in his throat, “She dumped me, she didn’t need me—“
“That’s not true and you know it, you grew apart because you wanted different things at the time but what about now?” Taehyung asked, “Y/n looked for you—I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to make you mad talking about it but Yoongi called me a few weeks back—right before you told me she went to the studio. Who do you think told her you were back?”
Jungkook didn’t say anything as he watched his cigarette burn on its own. He remembers when you went and you talked about the tapes but he didn’t have the courage to ask how you knew where he worked or that he had moved back. He should have asked but did it matter?
The muffled sound of music and chatter blurred out the silence that had grown between the two friends and Taehyung knew Jungkook had nothing to say. When a phone began to ring and the chest pocket of Jungkook’s black plaid flannel lit up with the outline of a screen and Taehyung didn’t have to ask to know who that might be. He dropped his cigarette on the floor to put it out with his shoe before placing an encouraging hand on his friend’s shoulder and leaving him outside alone.
For a moment Jungkook debated following him back into the dark nightclub and pretending like he was having the time of his life with Yuna but he knew he wouldn’t. He reached into his pocket and answered the call without another wasted second of hesitation, “Hello?”
“Jungkook, hey?” Your voice sounded a bit hoarse and he could hear noise behind you, “Are you, um, bu—do you have a moment?”
Jungkook looked up at the moon, taking a deep breath coming to terms with the fact that he’s afraid to open himself up to you again even if it’s just as acquaintances, “I’m not busy.”
“Really?” You asked slightly surprised, “Well, I—I was wondering if maybe you… um… maybe you wanted to meet me somewhere? O-or if, y’know you’re home… maybe I could come over to talk about us? My friend interrupted us last time and I feel like a lot of things went unsaid.”
You mentally cringed at yourself for sounding so nervous but what else was there to be expected? If you didn’t tell Jungkook how you felt now then maybe it’ll be another six years before you get to do it again—or worse, you won’t get another chance.
Jungkook looked around for the street sign as if he could imagine the distance he is from your place, “Where are you?”
Your heart seemed to raise, “I’m out with friends downtown but I can leave right no—“
“Where downtown?” He asked, walking just a bit away from the club entrance, listening to you tell him the street, “I’m a couple blocks down from there, at Club X.”
“Club X?” You asked and for a moment he debated telling you he was just with Taehyung but you quickly said, “Don’t move, I’ll walk.”
“Y/n, wai—“
Click.
Jungkook ran his fingers through his hair nervously, looking around once more knowing he should just stay put but you told him where you were too and the thought of just standing here waiting for you to arrive didn’t sit well with him. It would be too long of a wait and if he waits any longer he’s scared he’ll back out from wanting to see you too… so he ran.
You left your friends without much thought to how they felt about it, you paid your bill and left them just like that, practically running out the door. Before Jungkook could reject your proposal you hung up on him and that meant that if he didn’t want to see you then he would be leaving soon and you had to get to him before he did. You just needed to be honest.
Your feet ached from the heels you wore but that didn’t stop you from running down the uneven sidewalk, bumping into people on your way and checking for traffic whenever you crossed a street.
You wanted to be with him again, or at least try to be even if it was just as friends. It didn’t even have to be romantically [even if all the romantic feelings you had for him came back], you’ll take whatever he gives you as long as you know that he might feel the same. That’s all you want to know, that he might feel the same so you ran to him.
Jungkook was out of breath but he moved at a quicker pace than you did, running so fast he nearly dropped the person that bumped into him but he caught them before they could fall and held them by the arm, “Sorry.”
You stopped, tightening your hold on his forearm in shock, “Jungkook?”
He nearly stumbled as he froze on the spot, looking down at the person he bumped into on his way to you and his heart raced, “Y/n.”
“Jungkook, I—I told you to wait,” you stuttered as the two of you stood there at the end of a crosswalk ignoring all the people that passed you, “I—it’s about us, I wanted to see you—“
“Y/n,” he repeated your name, eyes scanning your face for any sign that you might regret asking to meet him but he found none. Before he could stop himself, his hands had made their way to your jaw, pulling you closer and it was all you needed to see to throw your arms around his neck and drag him down to meet your lips with his.
Jungkook didn’t hesitate to kiss you back with as much need and desire as you had and let his eyes shut, relishing in the feel of your soft lips that he had forgotten the taste of. The small kiss had been everything he missed, so soft and tender yet there was no mistaking the intense longing in each languid movement of your tongue with his that he nearly forgot where the two of you were till a car was honking annoyingly at the public display of affection—egging it on.
You pulled back with a pant, trying to catch your breath as your eyes ran along his face trying to understand his expression, hands sliding down to his ribs unsure if you should hold him or not. There was a lot you wanted to say but right now you wanted to feel him like this more, “Where?”
Jungkook bit his lip, breathing heavily through his nose as he slid his hand into yours and pulled you toward the street raising a hand to call a cab, “Mine.”
He was also aware that the two of you needed to talk and he planned on doing that but first… first he just needed to have you in his arms again. He just needed to feel you want him back one more time before the weight of whatever the two of you talked about came crashing down and there was no going back. It’s been six years of not being with you, you would think any ounce of romantic attraction would be gone and yet every time he remembered you or thought about you, it hit him harder than before and he spent the cab ride kissing you like he would never get the chance again—and he might not.
When you got to his house, you didn’t get a chance to look around when Jungkook was dragging you back into his arms, kicking the front door shut and kissing you.
“We’ll talk after,” you said more to yourself than to him when he yanked off his unbuttoned flannel, walking you backwards down a hall.
“After,” Jungkook repeated, breathless as he pulled away to kiss down your neck, placing soft kisses along your jaw and down your jugular. You craned yourself back to give him more room and dunk your fingers into his short black hair. He let his hands roam down your body, memorizing the feel of you under his fingertips once more and gripping your sides as you released a small gasp when the back of your knees hit a bed and you were falling back. His hands went to your back feeling along the material of your short black dress he hadn’t had a chance to admire and gently touched your ass, making you breathless before you felt his fingers slip under the hem further to feel along your spine, pulling the dress up until you were taking it off.
“It’s been so long,” he whispered softly between small kisses along your shoulder blade, letting you fall back on the bed in nothing but your underwear and bra. He sat back on his knees, staring down at you with glossy eyes. God, he missed you so much. He missed everything about you from your body to the way you used to softly run your fingers through his hair.
Six years.
Six years without seeing you laying down underneath him sliding a finger between the valley of your breasts teasingly, reaching behind you to take it off. He watched, nearly hypnotized by the way you slowly revealed all of yourself to him, saying, “Too long, I’ve almost forgotten how you feel.”
Jungkook licked his lips looking down at your bare chest, sinking down to lower his head until his nose lightly brushed against your soft skin making you wither just a little.
“I’ll fix that,” he whispered, eyes meeting yours and pressing a light kiss on your exposed breast, warm breath tickling you and making you bite your lip with anticipation.
“I want to see you,” your voice was as soft as his had been and he couldn’t help but sigh in content, nodding his head and pulling back to undress. He yanked off the black t-shirt he had worn under his flannel and kicked off his black denim jeans throwing them off somewhere on the floor near his snake terrarium that produced a red light—a huge contrast to the blue hue of light the rest of his apartment showed. When he sat bare between your parted legs you took in the sight of him.
His tattoos danced across his skin with every flex of his arms and it was all so new to you that you wanted to memorize it all. You reached your hands out hesitant to touch him, and heard a quiet gasp come from between his lips when your hands ran over his chest feeling every ridge of abdomen muscle, until you touched the top ball of his belly button piercing—surprised he still had it. His muscles tightened, feeling your fingertip slide back up until you were tracing the patterns of ink on his arm and shoulder.
"Y/n," Jungkook said your name with such tenderness that you stopped and looked up immediately, watching him hover over you and lower his mouth to the expanse of your neck sucking on your skin lightly. You bit your lip with want feeling his kisses moving lower, kissing along your collarbone. You ran your hands along his back when his tongue licked down to the valley of your breasts, tracing circles around your hardened nipple teasingly, bringing one into his mouth and sucking gently. The tip of his tongue flicked at your bud before capturing the whole thing in his mouth and licking the end, hands running along your sides to keep your body in place.
He kept this up for some time that all you could do was lay there and attempt to catch your breath as he memorized himself with your body again. It wasn’t just your breasts that got attention, he kissed your ribs and stomach, down your arms and along your neck. When he kissed along your navel toward your pelvis, his rough fingertips played with the hem of your panties until you were lifting your hips enough for him to slip them off you, leaving you just as nude as he.
“I missed this,” he said hoarsely, hands sliding down your inner thighs until he was slowly pulling them apart and fixing himself comfortably between them, “I don’t think you realize how much.”
He didn’t even realize how much he had missed—he didn’t allow himself to and now that he’s done it, it’s all he could focus on.
“I missed you too,” your tone was soft yet he could feel the emotion through it and it made him pause for a moment, debating if this was a confession or not and if he should stop so the two of you could talk.
He hadn't even touched you in the place you needed him most and yet you were on edge already. It’s not like you had expected to even kiss—much less this—that you found yourself already aroused but it felt so good to have him touch you again. After so much time apart, your body still reacted to him the way it used to and part of that scared you to admit.
"Jungkook," you licked your lips when his hair tickled against your cunt meaning he was getting closer. He hummed in response. Your voice was dry as you asked, "Condom?" It took him a second to pull away looking you in the eye as he sat back. Realization hit him like a truck as he stared down at your naked body then his, painfully aware of his hardened member and how quickly you had made him like this with only some kissing and teasing. He shook his head, "I don't—"
You sat up enough to pull him down and kiss him again, wanting nothing more but for this to continue whether you had a condom or not. “I don’t care, if you don’t.”
It didn’t take him long to understand what you meant and with the way your tongue kissed his, he couldn’t deny you even if he wanted to. Before, he used to take his time with you, making sure he satisfied all your needs with his tongue or fingers—whatever you wanted and he had subconsciously decided to do that tonight too. The only difference is that it’s been too long to take his time, he needed you now.
Your eyes ran over his body, still in disbelief with the sight of him above you, watching his hand slide down his toned stomach to his aching member. He stroked the tip of his cock softly, in search of some release as he let you take all the time you needed to watch him. The room was quiet aside from your heavy panting and buzz of his heat lamp but it still felt so loud. Your blood rushed to your ears, realizing what the two of you were doing and for a moment you wondered if this was a good idea but it didn’t take long for you to realize you didn’t care either way. You could worry about the repercussions later.
Jungkook leaned down between your parted thighs until his lips brushed against yours and his hard cock pressed against your wet heat, “You’re still the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”
Your heart dropped at his tender words, breath hitching in your throat and letting your hands touch against his arms, “Even after so long?”
There was a soft sound of a cricket not far outside the window and when he whispered, “Everlong,” to you, you had to stop and stare into his eyes in search of something to say. It was a small ode to Foo Fighters’ song ‘Everlong’ and how no matter how much time you spent apart, he would forever feel this way about you.
The red heat lamp did little to light the room along the moon but he still saw the way your eyes seemed to water, feeling your hands brush against his cheek, “I’m sorry.”
He seemed to freeze even as his cock aligned with your folds, coated in your arousal and all he needed was one push of his hips to feel you once more and yet he stopped, “Sorry?”
Did you want to stop?
Did you realize that this might not be the best idea?
Had he said something that made you want to leave?
“I was scared,” you admitted suddenly, “We wanted different things and I was scared that you would realize that after it was too late and you would just throw me away.”
He resisted the urge to scoff, bringing a hand up to push your hair out of your face and onto the pillow, “You know I never would have, baby.”
The pet name slipped out without his intention, “I never loved anyone as much as I loved you.”
It didn’t slip by either of you his use of past tense but you understood what he meant and you hated that you couldn’t before. It’s crazy how a silly little friendship between two coworkers who like the same music and style had developed so far out into the future that when your relationship ended, you couldn’t ever fully move on.
“I want to feel you,” you whispered, your nose brushing against his as he dropped his head to look down at the small space between your bodies. Jungkook was gentle in finding your entrance with the tip of his cock, guiding himself between your folds until you released a gasp at the stretch. Although it hurt for a moment, it didn’t take your body long to get used to him—like it had been waiting to feel him all this time and your mouths drew open in silent gasps when he bottomed out waiting there for the stretching. Even without foreplay your bodies seemed to know exactly what they needed to do and you hugged him, releasing a small moan in his ear as he dropped his head against your neck. Jungkook felt his heart race as you clung to him, letting him get used to feeling your walls around his dick once more and for a second it felt like too much, “Oh fuck, I missed you.”
“I missed you so much,” you confessed with a sigh when he drew his hips back slightly before bringing them forward in a single thrust as if testing the waters first, “So much, Jungkook.”
What’s crazy is how you had been so unaware of it as if some of the things you did weren’t constant reminders of him that you had to force yourself to forget. You still wore beanies because of him, you listened to fucking Korn because of him, you still slept on the right side because he liked the left—even when past partners would argue that they liked that side too, you never changed it. You had craved him in every aspect of your life even when you had forgotten it… that’s why you kept the tapes.
You let out a moan from his slow thrusts, in and out, in and out, dragging his cock out slowly as if letting you remember what it felt like to have him inside of you against and it had your legs moving to wrap around his waist. You grip his shoulders tightly moving your hips in rhythm with his, it was a slow and sensual yet rough fucking that had you begging, “Jungkook, more."
He rose his head from your neck, hips thrusting his thick cock into your wet pussy, doing exactly what you wanted.
He licked the corner of your mouth as you watched his hips draw back before pushing forward harshly, “I wanted to stop thinking about you, baby, but I couldn’t.”
You heard him clearly and you didn’t need to ask to understand what he meant, you simply ran your hands down his toned, muscular back guiding him to fuck you harder as he went on, “Even when I thought I hated you, I couldn’t let you go.”
The two of you were supposed to talk after and yet he he was losing his rhythm and talking to you while passionately and aggressively fucking you. “I’m sorry,” you repeated with a soft moan, “I should have never left you.” You kiss him for a moment before he moves down and leaves a bite on your chest making you whine out from it and he moves his hands down to your hips, gripping tightly as he fucked you harder, “You’re right, you shouldn’t have.”
" Jungkook," you moaned again, clinging to him, feeling your climax close, "I still love you."
He seemed to come to a halt at your sudden confession and you nearly pushed him away, surprised by yourself and your impulsiveness but he only pressed his body harder against yours.
"I love you so fucking much," he growled into your chest as he began to pound into you. The room filled with a string of moans as he fucked you unlike he ever had before, completely different yet still as passionate as he used to and moaned into your ear, “So close.”
“Ngh,” you gasped, “You feel so good, I think I’m gonna cum soon.”
“Mhm,” he hummed in content, clinging to you as much as possible, “Please, Y/n, I need to feel it, one more time baby, it’s been so long since you came for me.”
His thumb had slid down your body until it found your clit which had hardened with arousal and he rubbed light patterns around it, feeling your walls twitch and it became harder for him to drag his cock back out with the way you tightened.
“I’m going to cum,” he admitted, nails digging into the soft flesh of your thighs urging you to let him go but your legs held him in place and he realized what you wanted—he wanted it too. He didn’t want to pull away from you for even a second and as your walls convulsed around him with release, he couldn’t help but let go with a moan.
He held your body to his panting heavily as your sweat covered bodies clung to each other desparatelt, both letting your orgasms ride their wave before pulling apart.
It took him a moment to gather enough strength to pull out, doing so with a small tired grunt until he was rolling onto his back feeling out of breath, hand searching for yours on the bed.
The realization that the two of you just had unprotected sex after six years apart seemed to hit you first and you sat up worried, looking over at him as he struggled to catch his breath, “Bathroom?”
He lifted a tired hand toward his en suite and you left him tired and alone in the darkness of his bedroom.
You cleaned yourself up as best as you could, trying not to let what just happened cloud your mind and remind yourself that you had wanted to talk to him. You’re not sure what this meant, if this meant anything more than just sex between ex lovers or if this was more but you didn’t have much time to question it when Jungkook knocked on the bathroom door and let himself in. He walked past you to the large bathtub, running the water and letting it fill as he looked at you with worry, “You okay?”
“Yeah,” you nodded your head, biting your lip, “You?”
A small smile came to his face as the water quickly filled behind him, “Yeah.”
When the bathtub was filled, Jungkook took your hand in his and led you inside the water, “But we should talk.”
“I agree,” you said, suddenly shy by your nakedness and brought your knees to your chest, sinking into the water with your back pressed against the side of the rub. Jungkook sat on the other end, never letting go of your hand as he pulled you toward him until you were between his legs with your back against his chest.
“Y/n,” his voice was soft as he cupped water in his palm to pour down on your bare shoulder, “I really did miss you.”
You released your lip from between your teeth, leaning further against him, “I missed you too.”
“And I want to be with you,” Jungkook admitted, “Even if it’s not how it used to be.”
It was impossible to be how it was six years ago and he’s realized that now but he doesn’t care. If you asked him to be friends even after the passionate sex the two of you had just had, he would do it as long as it meant he could be with you.
“You don’t hate me?” You asked sounding worried. You still loved him and it was embarassing enough to know you finally admitted it when he was inside you but it didn’t change the fact that it was true. You loved Jungkook so much and maybe you always had deep down even when you told yourself you didn’t but could the two of you really try this again?
“I could never,” he said placing a soft kiss on your shoulder as he began to wash the front of your body with his sponge, “You know that.”
“But I left you—“
“No, I left you,” Jungkook said, “I’m the one who wanted to move Y/n, not you. I’m the one who made you feel like you had to choose.”
You stayed quiet and he worried he upset you.
“I came back because I realized that my home wasn’t anywhere else but with you,” he confessed, “And I was too much of a coward when I came back that I didn’t go looking for you the second I had the chance to.”
“Jungkook,” you turned to face him, cuddling into him in the bathtub and eyes wide with affection, “Let’s try, one more time. L-let’s, let’s give us a shot… I… I—I have so much I wish I could’ve done better and if you just give me a chance I promise I will love and support anything you do—“
“Y/n, I would give us a million chances over again if it means I could be with you still.”
::.
yallllll the took me forever 😭ik there wasn’t too much focus on their relationship in the tapes but that’s bc I’m gonna do drabbles of them when I get the chance
permanent taglist: @notmyfaultbutours @rerefundslocals @fandems @sugaluvmyg @guvgguk @kimyishin @libra04 @kooromiwrld @classycreationcupcake-blog @alwaysdreamingnotsleeping @cherrymonlightt @nikkiordonez12 @asking4-sanity @thvlover7 @saweetspoiled @uwu2rawr @shaybts-blog @babycandy111 @tearyjjeon @joons-uparupa @jeonninja @yellowcupid08 @02010802faves @knudsenheggedal edel @skzthinker @unnatae @aurorthi @beautywine e @95ene @taekookstata @lilliankoo @shescharlie @annenakamura @lesoleile @burnahtsw @babybella337 @kooloveys @ku-ku @chaelvrx @minnie-mouser22 @Imeneghd @whoa-jo @evajeonsworld @marvelbun n @sunnikthv @kochycooky @heyhowyoudoin3 @acielelyseen @giselleswifeee @jeonjk25 @ilikeitlikethatt @bangmechanpls @lvr2seok @badbyeyoongi i @jaerisdiction @watermelonjuice15 @artmsmaid @xyahrinx @angeleen777 @jooniesxbby @brillantdarling
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jeonsbabygirlsworld · 20 days
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SUMMARY: Life was easy until you meet the eye candy of your life and the adventure with him is a hell of ride, but there is certain someone who seems to get hurt in this.
PAIRINGS: Gynecologist Jungkook X reader ft. bartender yoongi
WORD COUNT: 1.2K
A/N: lol I see no one wants to get tagged in this when I posted the snippet but anyway the tag list is open, and please guys don't let this flop; [ I worked really hard to get motivated enough and write, and this a series and this the first part.✨smut will be there eventually ✨
Note : this is inspired by a web series and I’m GONNA EDIT IT , I’m not gonna make it a whole ass 3 season containing 10-12 episodes per season and I felt like I could do something with this series. Thankyou
Your surroundings suddenly felt hot, the interns did a great job explaining the project to the clients sitting in front of you. The air conditioner did a shit job of keeping the surroundings but it's just you because you see your other intern rubbing her palms under the table.
The meeting was about to end and just when you were about to get up from the chair to leave the hall, the intern called out your name just so you could brief out the entire thing and thank the clients, grabbing on the metal stick you stand in the place where your intern was speaking.
"I hereby extensively elaborate on the profile success of our company, we all can see the numbers of shares growing quickly, see for yourselves" You point to the whiteboard where the graph was made, your company making progress in these past years.
"We can be a great profit for the leading country, sir, I hope you can see the numbers growing live" You then point to the laptop which has a live count of people buying the shares from the company, in the middle while everyone was focused you undo some of the buttons of your red satin shirt and mutter about the poor air conditioner "why am I so damn hot?"
Just when you were about to continue you see Mr. Jeon sitting on one of the chairs that too naked, just in his Calvin Klein boxers, what the fuck? "Yes Ms. Kim, why are you so damn hot?" Jungkook says he rises from his seat climbs over the desk and walks towards you.
you can see the client in shock and eye him, while he climbs down from the table your doctor "Mr. Jeon" is in front of you, his eight packs abs and muscular biceps all out to see, just when you are registering about his details, he picks up the glass of water on the table and drops it all over the neck and you hiss at the cold feeling.
Jungkook scurries the files away from the table and picks you up so you can sit on the table, your shirt is then unbuttoned by him, and he lays soft kisses and slowly bends you down completely until your back is pressed on the table.
Beep beep beep
A loud beep of your alarm drags you out of the dream and you gasp and sit up "fuck did I just have a wet dream about my doctor?" you mutter and grab your phone to off the alarm, you check the number of notifications you had overnight and stumble upon the "doctor's appointment" reminder.
Gasping for the second time now you scurry away from the bed to get a nice warm shower and head to the mister ever so sexy man your doctor "Jeon Jungkook".
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"It's itchy lately, hasn't got better since last week" You talk to the man who is between your legs while you keep trying to not moan while checking your vagina. "You may get dressed now and it looks completely fine, and I can't see any infection" Jungkook says and stands straight and moves to his chair right behind the desk giving you some space so you can change.
closing the blinds and getting dressed you place the hospital gown tidily in the basket and move to his table, you grab on the sanitizer which is on his table pump a few drops on yours and apply it while your doctor writes down the prescription.
You notice the hot features of a sleeve tattoo of his you saw on his Instagram when you stalked him on the first day of meeting him, the depth of his gaze looked enchanting, and the afternoon sunlight complimented his skin tone well while you were busy studying his features a small cough brings you out of the daydream.
"Here miss y/n" The doctor hands you the prescription and you widen your eyes seeing at the statement which had written "bath three times a day" You eye him and check yourself by smelling when he isn't looking, and you smell perfectly fine because you sprayed almost the bottle of the perfume and bathed with the new soap bar you bought recently. Giving him a crooked smile you leave the room embarrassed.
Crumbling the paper you place it in your purse and straight away call your best friends to meet up for a brunch and she gladly accepts.
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"No, but like seriously y/n" Chae and Yuna both seem shocked and confused and you appear to be more embarrassed "Yeah, he wrote that in the prescription" You show her the paper Jungkook gave you, and she says he wrote it so that you could maintain a proper hygiene and you buy it and proceed to eat your brunch in the cafe.
"Chae Yuna, you can go ahead I'm staying back so I can spend some time with Yoongi, I haven't been catching up on him." Tell her you give her a hug and a kiss on the cheeks, and you part ways.
You head to the bar where yoongi works as a bartender and you make sure to buy his favorite chocolate on your way, you reach there in less than five minutes and there you see Yoongi arranging the glasses in line just to make them fancier.
"Hey, how are you?" Yoongi is slightly confused to see you in the middle of the day and that too a weekday, you chuckle at him, and you tell him you are fine, and you had to meet a friend and not tell him the details about the meeting with the doctor.
"You up for a drink y/n?" The sweet boy asks you and you gladly accept it, looking here and there you realize he is working alone and his intern who never fails to hit on Chae is missing.
"Is Taehyung not here?" you ask him, and he says he had ditched today just because he had an early date and will be here for the night shift nodding you accept his famous highball, "you want any help? I'm free for the day" you offer him, and he casually refuses, and you become a bit sad, but you play it cool.
Yoongi looks at your features and chuckles and tells you he is just kidding and won't mind your help and he's rather happy you want to help him, before coming back to the other side of the table you hand him the chocolate you bought.
Helping him and chatting for a while you hug him and say goodbye, you notice a bit of blush creeping on his cheeks but you wave it up because it can be the alcohol you both drank, and you get back to your home and get a bit of rest so you can wake up fresh and get back on your work from home.
Taglist: @jungk97kwife, @kimmingyuswifee ,@kingofbodyrolls
A/n : this short but hehe more is yet to come 💖
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jungkookschin · 6 months
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older
think i need someone older, just a little bit colder, take the weight off your shoulders
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synopsis: all your friends say you're delusional for thinking you have a chance with jungkook, the handsome older man you've known since forever, but you just can't seem to let him go. word count: 18k
pairing: older!jungkook x afab reader
genre: age gap au (seven years), social media au!!!, childhood acquaintance au, fluff, comedy, angsty, outta pocket, alludes to sexual innuendoes warnings: character death (not jk or y/n), cursing, nudity,
author's note: i am so overwhelmed with the support i've gotten for this fic!! obviously this isn't going to be the best written fanfic, but i genuinely enjoyed writing it!! and yes, there will be a part 2!
“Girl.. be for real. He doesn’t want you.” Beomgyu’s opinion bounces off your bedroom wall but shoots into your heart like an arrow; you subtly glare at him through your vanity mirror. Though, the Snorlax plush headband and unblended concealer in triangles under your eyes is far less than intimidating. 
“Okay, fuck you-”
Beomgyu shrugs. “You can wear all the makeup in the world and you would never get his attention,” he nonchalantly utters, not caring enough to even look at you while he addresses you. You pout, sulking as Beomgyu’s very real assertion settles into your system. 
Jeon Jungkook would never see you that way. 
He adores you because you’ve been acquainted since childhood- your parents being close friends. He’s seven years older than you and has witnessed you blossom from a childish boy-crazy kid to an equally boy-crazy adult, the same way you’ve seen him go from a prepubescent pre teen to a hot, older, rich, man. 
“Look, and that’s not to say that you’re not pretty or whatever because you are pretty and a lot of guys want you, but Jungkook… he’s just too old for you,” he offers you an empathetic smile before attempting to assuage the petulance in the air.  “Honestly, I would be even more concerned if he responded to your advances because that would be.. hella weird.”
Beomgyu’s claims often transform your brain into a philosophical battlefield. Would it really be all that inappropriate for Jungkook to see you as a woman? An age gap of seven years holds no real significance if you were both in your 20’s, right? But does Jungkook knowing you since childhood completely nullify any chance you have with him?
“Oh fuck off with that. I’m not a little kid anymore. I’m already 19 years old, almost 20-”
“The delusion is never escaping this one…” Beomgyu mumbles. He finally looks up from his phone when you spring up from your chair and stomp over to him. You hold your manicured claw up to scratch his face, but Beomgyu grabs your wrist before you can do any damage. 
“You’re such a horse girl, don’t try to scratch me- wait are you crying?” Beomgyu’s gaze melts after noticing the tears accumulating in your waterline. 
“No!” you respond, the tip of your nose becoming slightly red. You raise your sleeve to wipe your nose. 
“Wait Y/N! You’re going to get makeup all over my hoodie!-” 
Beomgyu halts when he sees your unblended concealer transfer onto his very white and expensive hoodie. His lips form into a straight line while he stares at you blankly. 
“Sorry?” you squeak. He gestures dramatically- blinking at you like a pissed off owl.
You bolt to the door, sprinting from Beomgyu before he quickly follows in pursuit of you. You run through the house, tumbling down the stairs frantically, and when you turn the corner, you stub your toe against the wall, stumbling over and falling flat on your face. 
You shriek in pain, holding onto your toe. Your eyes immediately tear up, sobbing through the pain blistering in your toe. And for some reason, Beomgyu is nowhere to be found. 
“Y/N? Are you okay?” 
You freeze when none other than Jungkook pops out of his room, completely shirtless with nothing but gray sweats on. His abs are literally ripping in your face and his entire sleeve of beautiful tattoos are practically mocking you- especially the mask one. It's laughing in your face because it gets to be on Jungkook’s body and you don’t.  
You begin to cry even harder. No physical pain would ever compare to the pain of not being able to have him. 
“Whoa, whoa, what happened?” Jungkook kneels down and takes your foot in his large hands. 
Thank God you got your toes done the day before. His thumbs press into the balls of your feet while he carefully inspects your toes. “Not fractured, I think. Think you can get up, baby?”
Baby. He’s been calling you that stupid nickname since forever. That’s what  everybody used to call you when you were younger; you were the youngest of all your parents’ friends’ kids after all. But for some reason, the nickname only seemed to stick with Jungkook. He has this horrible tendency (not really) of doting on you, taking care of you, and spoiling you to oblivion. 
You sniffle, shaking your head. 
Jungkook’s handsome face crinkles into a subtle laughter, an amused expression etched onto his features.  He takes his pointer finger and thumb, pinching your nostrils and wiping your snot onto his sweats. 
You smile sheepishly, butterflies erupting in your stomach. 
This man will literally touch your feet and boogers as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. That has to mean something, right? 
Jungkook scoops you into his arms bridal style and takes you into his room. 
Why Jungkook has a room in your house is beyond you. It seems like he was always over doing some errands for your parents- not that you were complaining, of course. He sets you down on his bed and uses his large palm to smooth over the frizzy hairs that are sticking up. 
“Just stay here for a while. I’ll take you to Urgent Care if it hurts in a few hours.”
Truth be told, that shit didn’t even hurt anymore, but there’s no way you were going to pass this opportunity up. You nuzzle into Jungkook’s sheets, his masculine smell absolutely amplifying your will to live. His cologne smells so good, the musky elegance of his scent making you dizzy as you bask in his essence. 
Anyways! Looks like you’re canceling your plans with Beomgyu. Apparently, he already knows that. 
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Shutting your phone off, your eyes drift towards Jungkook, owlishly blinking at the computer code projected onto his large monitor. He’s got everything going for him: rich, hot, smart, successful. You want to cry again. “Jungkook, can I ask you something?”
His focus remains on the screen, eyes still boring onto the monitor before he absentmindedly responds, “Sup?”
“What would you do if a bear, a lion, and a gorilla just walked into this room right now?”
Jungkook’s fingers pause, hovering above his light up keyboard. He swivels around in his chair, his handsome features crinkling in evident confusion. 
“I’m serious. What would you do if a bear, a lion, and a gorilla showed up in your room? If you aren’t able to answer the question, then I don’t really know if I feel safe here,” you elaborate as you gesture with your hands, the bratty tone laced in your voice attempting to guilt trip him for not having a backup plan for this very specific specific situation. 
“Easy. I would feed you to them and then escape,” Jungkook bites back a cheeky smile  before spinning around and returning to his work. 
You gasp dramatically, pouting before you pull his covers over your head. 
Jungkook hums to himself, laughing at how obnoxious you can be.
Later on, another question is conjured in your imaginative little mind, and Jungkook’s lip twitches when he hears your classic Jungkook, I have another question. 
“Hmmm?”
“Do you think you could put me on with your piercing guy?”
Jungkook swivels around in his chair once again. “Thought you already had your ears and belly pierced.”
“It’s not enough. I want more. Wanna be like you,” you murmur, eyes settling on his five piercings decorating his left lobe, the one in his eyebrow, and the two on his lips. 
“It is enough,” he immediately counters, “You shouldn’t put holes in your body.”
You cock a brow at him.  “I know you’re not talking.”
Jungkook’s lip twitches upwards at your cheekiness. “Yea, I’ll send you his instagram. Tell him you’re with me and he’ll squeeze you in as soon as possible.”
-
“And I told Soobin to not piss in the water bottle, but he did anyway. And guess what? I almost drank from the same water bottle. Can you believe that? I was so fucking pissed at him I almost threw his piss back on him…” Yeonjun can tangibly feel that you’re not all there, your eyes occasionally drifting off- so his eyes follow your train of vision until-
“Oh c’mon Y/N!” Yeonjun’s fingers release the grip on the gym equipment, causing the weights to thunderously slam back into place. You yelp, flinching a bit before you swat Yeonjun’s biceps. 
“You scared me you bitch!”
“You scare me! And what the fuck are you wearing? What kind of basic bitch wears a pink set to the gym?”
You gasp dramatically. “You did not just say that.”
“And stop drooling over Jungkook! He doesn’t want you-mmmphh!” You clasp your palm over Yeonjun’s mouth mid-sentence, your boba eyes glaring up at him. You release your hand, pouting at him dramatically when you feel you’ve tortured him enough. 
Hands on your hips, you continue glowering at him and he gladly reciprocates the scowl on your lips. 
Yeonjun acquiesces from the glare-off almost immediately, too entirely soft to hold a grudge against his best friend. “Did you only agree to come to the gym with me to see Jungkook?” he asks, sincere disappointment laced in his words. 
You immediately soften, disheartened to hear the crestfallenness in his tone. You shake your head at the notion. “No- I wouldn’t do that. I swear he’s here by coincidence,” you explain thoughtfully, “I’m sorry for being an inattentive friend. It wasn’t intentional. I just get distracted whenever I see him. I’m sorry.” Your eyes return to Yeonjun’s who smiles knowingly at you. He opens his arms, offering an embrace and you gladly accept, hugging all the problems away. 
“You’re such a lovestruck girl,” Yeonjun teases. 
“I can’t help it. He just looks so good. Look at his arms and his tattoos- oh Yeonjun, I’ll never get over him. What should I do?”
“We just have to kill him. That’s the only option left,” your eyes meet his, his empty gaze boring into your skull before you both burst into giggles. 
“You’re right. That is the only option left.” You take a step back to stretch your arms, releasing the tension in your limbs until you sense a very familiar walking pattern approaching you.
“Hey Y/N,” Jungkook casually greets, creeping behind you to wrap a single arm around your shoulder. He pulls you closer to him from behind, nonchalantly nuzzling his forehead into the back of your head. You use both your hands to grip onto his thick forearm. “Um, hey Kook.”
Yeonjun bites back laughter, watching how you practically become hysterical at Jungkook’s casual gesture. 
Jungkook uses his vacant hand to dap up Yeonjun- over your head. “What’s up Yeonjun?” Jungkook grins. Yeonjun reciprocates the friendly greeting. “Hey, how’ve you been?  You looked great with the tricep presses.”
Jungkook beams at that. “Oh, you saw? I’ve been bulking so I’m trying to go super heavy with the weights.”
“I can tell. You look fucking enormous,” Yeonjun comments. 
Jungkook immediately dismisses the compliment with a wave. “Don’t say that. You look good too…”
Tuning out of the interaction, your brain begins to malfunction when you realize that Jungkook is extremely familiar with all of your friends. You definitely aren’t the most social person, often opting to napping in your cozy bed instead of going into the harsh, unforgiving world, but you are lucky enough to have great friends like Yunjin, Yeonjun, Beomgyu, and Jungkook knows all of them. That had to be indicative of something deeper, right? Perhaps his underlying affection for you? Or a sign that he was possibly in love with you? 
“What are you giggling about?” Jungkook teases, gently using his vacant hand to ruffle your hair. 
You crimson intensely. “Nothing,” you sheepishly respond, skitterishly ducking under Jungkook’s arm to scurry behind Yeonjun, using your friend as a protective shield. 
“What’s up with her?” Jungkook asks Yeonjun, to which Yeonjun feigns ignorance. “Not a clue.”
“Well then, I’m gonna head out. I’m actually staying at Y/N’s for a bit because her parents are out of town. Can you believe I still have to babysit her?” Jungkook says to Yeonjun, giving you a teasing glance. 
“It’s just in case someone stalks me or tries to kill me! I don’t need to be babysat,” you emphasize, scowling at Jungkook and he can’t help but to reach out and pinch your cheek. The casual gesture sends you over the moon. 
“Whatever you say. You need a ride home though? I can wait so Yeonjun doesn’t have to waste gas on you,” Jungkook suggests, eyes darting towards yours then Yeonjun’s to detect any traces of reticence or hesitation in his features. 
You do the same, glancing towards Yeonjun who actually sports a look of indifference. You playfully link your arms with Yeonjun’s before sending Jungkook a downward smile. “It’s okay Kook.  Wanna spend time with my friend today.”
A touched gasp leaves Yeonjun’s lips as he holds his hand over his heart, gesticulating dramatically to convey his surprise that you would choose him over the man you’ve been salivating over the past thirty minutes. 
Jungkook has no protests about your preference. “Alright Y/N, see you at home. See you Yeonjun,” he gives you a little squeeze before he departs. 
Yeonjun waits until Jungkook is out of ear shot to provoke you, mocking you in an obnoxious, high pitched voice, “I don’t need to be babysat! You’re such a baby- but thank you for choosing me, you know.”
You tilt your head, eyebrows pinching before you subtly frown at Yeonjun’s comment. “Of course I would choose you. You’re my friend.” You say it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world- because it kinda is. Bros over hoes any day. 
Yeonjun’s lips quirk up at the sentiment, “Oh how touching, thank you so much for gracing me with your presence, my queen.”
-
Jungkook thinks you can be such a princess sometimes, especially when you drag your feet back into the house, a sour expression consuming your pretty features. Particularly receptive to your emotional fluctuations, he doesn’t hesitate to ask you what’s up. 
He leans against the kitchen counter, rolling his sleeves up to his elbows as his eyes settle on your moping figure. “Who made you sad? Bring them to me right now,” he muses. 
You pause, letting your light green gym bag (with little Snorlax’s decorated all over it) fall to the floor with a thud before gazing at him with a vacuous expression. “Why are you dressed up?” you point towards his work attire- a simple white button up and slacks. The buttons on his dress shirt are undone and messy, giving you access to his chest and it makes you want to roll around on the floor and cry. His slacks are tight- accentuating his long, muscular legs and you decide that you’d be okay with dying only if  you were suffocated between his thighs. 
“Had a work call,” he responds, indifference laced in his voice, “Now who made you sad? Want oppa to handle it for you?” he teases, releasing a breathless laugh at the way your nose scrunches up in disgust. 
Nonetheless, you spill everything to Jungkook- because you always spill everything to Jungkook and because you trust him with everything in you. He makes you feel safe. Plopping yourself down on the seat by the dining counter, you wordlessly slide your phone across the counter. Jungkook effortlessly stops your phone with a single hand, his eyes scanning across the array of text messages popping up on the screen. 
“Not this guy again,” he mutters under his breath, gauging the situation. 
“I know!” you concede, “Wish he would leave me alone- but I feel like I have to respond.”
The text messages were from none other than your ex-boyfriend, telling you how much he misses you, how he’ll do better for you, and every other generic I want you back text in the book.  
There are various reasons why you feel obligated to respond to him: (a) the whole breakup was a mess and (b) it was your fault. You were in a long-term, committed relationship with your high school sweetheart until you recognized your exponentially growing feelings for Jungkook. The guilt of breaking your ex’s heart haunts you- his crying, tear-stained face often popping up in your mind when you feel shitty, making you feel even shittier.  Though you were no longer emotionally tied to him you do feel obligated to give him closure, or at the very least respond to his text messages.  
But you’ve had this conversation with your ex numerous times. How much closure does one need in order to move on?
“You don’t have to respond to him,” Jungkook’s sonorous voice pulls you from the thoughts plaguing your mind. “You’ve already told him how you feel,” Jungkook is the rational force in your life, always tugging you towards the right direction, especially when your susceptible mind feels the need to please everyone and everything.
“I know,” you sigh, “I just feel bad. He was my first kiss, first boyfriend. It feels like I just abandoned him.”
A look of contemplation blankets Jungkook’s handsome face, evident by the way his fingers trace over his chin and lips. “That’s true,” he eventually asserts, “but no one as young as you should stay in a relationship out of obligation.” He approaches you and settles himself down on the vacant seat beside you. “Actually Y/N, I’m proud of you for building up the courage to let him go. It would be more painful if you forced yourself to stay.” 
You purse your lips and nod, allowing yourself to enjoy the sensation of Jungkook comfortingly rubbing your back. “t’s just sad. I used to love him.”
“I know Y/N, but sometimes you just have to start living in the present instead of the past. If you respond you’re just going to give him false hope. Just let it be,” he articulates, using prudence to assuage you.
You nod, craning your head to sustain eye contact with him, making the conversation feel all the more intimate and personal, “How would you feel if you were him? I mean- if your girlfriend broke up with you and you were still like- in love- with her?”
He tilts his head, thoroughly contemplating the question because he takes your feelings seriously, and he wants to give you the right answers. “If my girlfriend loses feelings then she loses feelings, there’s nothing I can do about it. I definitely wouldn’t beg for her back, I’d go out and make a lot of money instead,” he smiles, “But I wouldn’t know how it feels. I’ve never been dumped before,” he adds. 
“Seriously?” you interject, not believing that Jungkook has never been dumped in his 26 years of living. “What about that one girl you brought to Thanksgiving Dinner a few years ago? What happened to her?”
“Ahh her?” he somewhat grimaces at the thought of his ex-girlfriend, “She was getting a little too suffocating so I let her go. She was really pissed off- tried to key my car and shit,” he states. 
You gasp. His ex-girlfriend was so sweet to you- she even bought you a Snorlax plush keychain. But you can imagine Jungkook trying to hold her back while she jostles out of his grip, trying to key his car- his baby. “No way? If she ever comes back, just let me know. I’ll throw hands for you,” you enunciate, showing him your fists to which Jungkook just scoffs in amusement. 
“Yea, I’ll definitely call you,” he remarks sarcastically before getting up, “So are you good, baby?” he asks, casually resting his hand on your shoulder, and you nod. 
“‘M good. I’m not gonna respond to him.”
Jungkook’s lips quirk up at that. “Good.”
-
 Jungkook is livid. You can tell by the way he spam calls you even after you repeatedly reject his calls. You quietly sneak out of the lecture hall and answer his call once you’ve reached the hallway. 
“What? I’m in class,” you impatiently mutter. 
“You’re fucking kidding, aren’t you?” he scoffs through the phone, “I canceled your appointment, by the way.”
The color drains from your face once you realize what this is about. “He told you?”
“You’re out of your fucking mind if you thought you could go through me to get your nipples pierced! I can’t believe you thought I would let you do that!”
“Why? What’s wrong with it?” you whisper shout into his phone, “I’m an adult, I can do whatever I want!”
“No you’re not. Baby, you can’t even drink,” he reiterates, a little more calmly this time. 
“Who cares? You’re not my mom! I can do whatever I want. Even if it’s through someone else!” you bark back. The silence that ensues intimidates you.
“Baby.” His voice is low, and it’s kinda hot but you don’t pay attention to it because of how angry you are at him trying to monopolize your actions.
“I’m not a fucking baby anymore so stop calling me that!” 
“You’re not a baby?” Jungkook laughs lowly into the phone, as if the claim itself is ridiculous.
“‘m not.” He can practically hear your pout through the phone.
“You can’t even get on a plane by yourself.”
You gasp at Jungkook’s low blow. That was one time. A month ago, you took a flight to Vegas for EDC to meet up with Yunjin, who flew out the day before you. But you had no clue how to check your bag in, and were far too intimidated to go through the security check by yourself. What if they thought your ID was fake? Or worse what if they sent you to jail? There was just no way you could go through by yourself.
You remember the way Jungkook shook his head at your preposterous notions but nonetheless still agreed to take care of you.
So Jungkook drove you to the airport, carried your bag for you, weighed it, and checked it in. He also stood with you for the entire thirty minute wait at security and only left the airport when called and told him you were waiting at the departure gate.
You don’t respond, and he takes it as an opportunity to further his point. 
“That’s what I thought. End of story. You’re not getting it done.” 
He hangs up and you blissfully sigh. This literally takes feminism back 32904098 years, but you kind of love a man that can put you in your place. 
-
Jungkook goes to the gym everyday solely so he can beat the shit out of Taehyung and Mingyu, who get off on tormenting him for his extremely complex and profound feelings for you. 
Hooking up to the bluetooth speaker and blaring the sound of police sirens, going “Ayo! He’s right here, officer!” every time they walk past a policeman- they even go as far as putting handcuffs on him while he sleeps- hooting and howling in laughter when Jungkook wakes with his hands restrained.  
Initially, it made his intestines twist and turn with pure guilt, guilt about harboring feelings for you, the little girl who used to prance around his room and do cartwheels in futile attempts to impress him. 
His friends make him feel like shit, but they’re his friends for a reason. 
“Hey, so how’s Y/N?” Mingyu casually asks, sinking into the welcoming leather of Jungkook’s sleek, black sofa. He props his feet up on Jungkook’s coffee table-  mahogany brown and custom designed to suit Jungkook’s meticulous and elegant taste. 
Jungkook narrows his eyes at the nonchalance of the comment, half expecting Taehyung to pop out of nowhere in policeman cosplay, ready to put him in cuffs. “Why’re you asking?”
When Mingyu detects the hostility blanketing Jungkook’s features, his jaw drops in realization of the reality of the situation. “Wait.. you don’t take us seriously when we tease you about that shit, right?”
Jungkook cocks his head in confusion, settling beside Mingyu, chopsticks in hand as he blows on his ramen. “I mean, kinda. I feel guilty about it.”
Mingyu eyes his friend for a while, and Jungkook slowly turns his head towards Mingyu when he feels lasers boring holes into his skull. “What, asshole?”
“Ah, sorry man. I didn’t know it bothered you. I kind of thought it was a given that you and Y/N are cute together. Didn’t know the age gap bothered you.”
Oh. 
Jungkook pauses, setting his sizzling ramen back into the plastic container instead of into his mouth, and Mingyu feels the need to further elaborate. 
“I mean, you’re always helping her out, taking care of her,  that’s pretty cute.”
Jungkook blinks at Mingyu, raking his tattooed hand through his hair. “Doesn’t that just make me look like a dumbass?” he mutters, before letting out a bitter, light-hearted laughter at the reality of his assertion.  
His emotions for you run deep and intricate, but one thing remains unequivocally clear: he doesn't do these things because he expects something in return. That would be selfish. Obligation doesn't factor into his decisions either. Jungkook doesn't subscribe to such motivations when it comes to his personal life. He views it as unnecessary and cumbersome—except when it involves you. Whether it's looking after you, lending you money, helping you with homework, or driving you to the airport, he does it all because he genuinely loves you.
He acknowledges the peculiarity of his natural inclination to care for you. In the past, he's ended numerous relationships due to girls he found excessively clingy, suffocating, or overbearing, all attributes he easily uses to describe you- but he lives for that shit when it comes to you.
Mingyu’s forehead wrinkles in confusion. “What? That girl loves you, Jungkook. If she does good in school and gets rich, you’d be bathing in that shit,” Mingyu jokes, causing Jungkook to sputter out laughter at the absurd thought. 
“Right now though?” Mingyu continues, “She wouldn’t be able to change your tire or some shit, but she brings you this sense of peace, and that’s something every guy needs in his girl.” 
Jungkook pauses at that. 
-
Jungkook is abruptly awoken by the blaring sound of his ringtone. Groggily, he reaches for his phone on the nightstand, eyes barely open. 
You, the only person that would call him at 3 in the morning, and you the only person he would answer at 3 in the morning.
Babysitting is the last word he would use to explain why he’s at your house right now. He’s at your house because, well,  he would do anything for you, even if you aren’t aware of the lengths he would go to keep you satiated and happy. 
He’s aware that men find you charming for your ditzy and oblivious nature, but Jungkook likes you regardless of whether or not you possess such an arbitrary trait. But it is true that there are a lot of things you aren’t aware of, like how utterly lovely you are. Jungkook knows you- sees how oblivious you are to the men who shamelessly ogle at you, or the boys who practically break their necks to get a glimpse at you. 
You have this resonating effect on him. You drive him crazy and you don’t even know it.
Initially, Jungkook had never truly focused his attention on you, yet as time passed, an irresistible attraction began to pull him toward you. He vividly recalls an incident in particular that left him dumbfounded.
Jungkook’s mom visited yours to drop off some vegetable. Gifting fruits and vegetables from their gardens are the way the aunties demonstrate their love and appreciation for one another. Jungkook reckons you didn’t know he was there because you pranced down the stairs with the tiniest boy shorts and  camisole top. Jungkook isn’t the type of man to become disoriented over the sight of a woman’s body, practically desensitized from all the women he’s been with, but he stiffens at your presence.
“Wow baby!” His mother giggles, using your classic nickname as she ogles you shamelessly, “You’re getting really sexy!” 
She playfully nudges your mom, “Are you ready to have grandchildren?” The joke makes your mother roll her eyes, though a smile lingers on her lips, infinitely proud of her beautiful daughter.
“I wish someone would marry my daughter!” Your mom jests, “All she ever does is sleep! I just wish a man would even look her way!” 
Jungkook’s eyebrows pinch in bewilderment. He knew your mother was only joking, teasing you as per usual- because clearly, you are captivatingly gorgeous. You make a sly comment in return to make his mom giggle, always so smooth and sociable with the old ladies. 
Suddenly, you randomly swivel around, yelping at Jungkook’s presence. “Oh hey,” you greet, fidgeting in place, “I didn’t know you were here. Sorry- I should cover up a little.”
For the first time in his life Jungkook is speechless in front of you. You. You just look so pretty standing in front of him, your manicured fingers twirling a single strand of hair, gazing at him and gnawing your lips like he makes you nervous when in reality you make him tremble with just one look. It makes his chest tighten and he inhales deeply to compose himself.
“No. Not at all, you should be comfortable in your own home,” the smile he offers you is forced, polite, and you’re bewildered at the tension accumulating between you and him. Your eyes glint downward; you can’t even look at him, and suddenly a bold wave of impulsivity washes over you.
“Hey Jungkook, can we talk in the other room?”
Jungkook’s eyes flash towards his mother’s then rapidly back at you. Subconsciously, his eyes trace down your body and he feels like has to physically gouge his eyes out to prevent himself from looking.
“Yea, sure.”
He follows you upstairs into the guest room, taking extreme measures to keep his pupils focused on the ceiling lights above your head. However, his efforts work against him because the ceiling lights shine on you like a spotlight, illuminating your gorgeous figure as you make your way up the stairs.
Your fingers wrap around his forearm and you pull him into the room.
You waste no time getting straight to the point.“Jungkook, I think I’m pregnant.”
Jungkook blinks, processing what you just said. “Huh?”
You bite your lip anxiously, crossing your arms while you look down at your toes. “My period is late, and I don’t know what to do- you’re the only person I trust to talk about this.”
Jungkook doesn’t hesitate to confirm the sentiment. “You can trust me with anything. I’ll always take care of you- ‘m just a little shocked because I thought you were still a virgin.”
Gasping dramatically, you pout at him and stomp your foot. “I’m not a little kid anymore.”
Yea, clearly not, he thinks. “Just act normal. After I drop my mom off at home I’ll come back with a pregnancy test.”
You nod and give him a downward smile. “Thanks- ‘m just really nervous and I hope I’m not pregnant because I don’t even remember who the dad is and-“
Jungkook frowns at that, perturbation morphing onto his features. “Y/N, you don’t remember who the dad is? Please don’t do that- only sleep with people you trust. Please.”
“I trust you.” 
The words tumble from your lips immediately, before you can even process your thoughts. You clasp your hand over your mouth, a small gasp leaving your lips as you gaze up at him in pure horror. 
Jungkook doesn’t know what to think- doesn’t even know if that was just a fragment of his imagination. He blinks at you, brain too fused to even conjure a proper response.
“Wait- I didn’t mean it like that!” you blurt out. At that moment, you give up on any attempt to salvage the situation and scurry out of the room, stumbling back down the stairs. 
Jungkook runs his hands over his face. 
He’s going to hell for the thoughts running through his mind.
Thank God you weren’t pregnant but after that night Jungkook just never looked at you as just a family friend. It’s complicated . It’s morally conflicting, and it frustrates Jungkook like nothing else.
“Hello?” he speaks into the phone
“I bled on my bed,” you sniffle into the phone, “Just please come upstairs,” you say before abruptly hanging up.
He begrudgingly rises from his bed. Though tired, he doesn’t hesitate to throw his black t-shirt over his head to look presentable for when he checks up on you.  Rubbing at his eyes with his knuckles, he shoves his hands into the pockets of his black sweats as he makes his way up the stairs. He gently opens the door to see you sitting idly under your covers, clinging onto your Snorlax plushie for dear life. You’re wearing 
He sits on the edge of your bed. “You ran out of pads?”
You don’t say anything, remaining stiff like an ice sculpture, not melting under Jungkook’s warm touch like you usually do.
He nods at you and gently tugs on your oversized T-shirt, urging you to get up as he sticks out his hand. “Change the sheets and I’ll go out and buy you some pads-“
“Jungkook, I'm in love with you.” 
Abrupt. 
Impulsive. 
Messy. 
But you feel like you just have to say it.  With a radiant glow on your rosy cheeks, you purse your lips in a demure manner, physically unable to look at him. You have to look at Snorlax to get your words out instead. 
You inhale deeply. “I’m sorry if that makes you uncomfortable, and I’m sorry if it creeps you out but I’ve always had feelings for you- and I hate you for it because I don’t think I’ll ever have the capacity to love anyone else like I love you.” With glossy eyes you finally peer at him just to see an entirely indecipherable expression- you’re not sure if it conveys shock, bewilderment, or horror but it evokes the most unsettling and humiliating sensation in the pit of your stomach. 
Just as day transforms into night, humiliation morphs into anger, and anger morphs into nonsensicality. Outrage bubbles within you and you chuck the Snorlax plushie at his face. 
“Fuck you! How can you treat me the way you do and expect me not to feel anything?! I emotionally cheated on my ex with you! You’re the fucking worst and I hate you. I hate you so fucking much!” Your hands frantically search for every single squishmallow, plushie, and teddy bear you have and you violently chuck your beloved squishies at him.  From zero to one hundred, you’ve escalated rapidly and you feel like you’ll die if you don’t convey everything to him right now, in this moment. 
Jungkook remains stoic, somewhat resembling the statue of a Greek god: handsome and stagnant, not even flinching at the impact of your squishies hitting his built body or the way you nonsensically scream at him.
“This is all your fucking fault Jungkook. You ruined my life! You ruined love for me! I’ll never get a boyfriend, never get married, never have kids because of you! I’m going to die alone and it’ll be all your fucking fault! How could you do that to me? How could you do that to me?” You erupt into sobs, pushing your face into your hands as you violently cry. Snot, tears, and saliva leak from your face as the chagrin completely consumes you. 
“Y/N.” The sound of Jungkook’s deep, baritone voice is barely audible over the sounds of your heaving. 
“I’m sorry Y/N.” He does sound sorry, but you can’t help but question the authenticity of his words because he didn’t do anything wrong in the first place. It’s like he’s merely uttering an apology to appease you. 
But for Jungkook, he’ll apologize a million times if it helps dry your tears.  He never let his pride get in the way when it comes to you.
He sits at the edge of your bed, using his finger to tilt your chin up, revealing your disheveled, snotty, and glossy face. You whimper when your vision clears and focuses on him. 
He wipes your face with your own shirt, tugging up the hem to absorb your tears, still gentle and attentive. You swat his hand away. “You need to stop doing that,” you mewl, blinking more tears from your eyes. 
“You need to stop crying. It makes me sad,” he retorts, passing you the same Snorlax plushie you violently launched at him. You cushion the plushie on top of your thighs and bring your knees to your chest. You inhale and exhale deeply, trying to settle from your emotional high. 
“You don’t even take me seriously,” you mumble, peeking up at him. 
“I always take you seriously,” Jungkook responds, “but I want you to stop crying first-
“Jungkook, kiss me,” you breathe out, “If you don’t hate me, then kiss me,” you say, your eyes fluttering shut, delusionally- as if he was about to kiss you. Instead, you feel his large palm on your head, softly caressing your hair. 
“I’m not gonna kiss you. You should get some rest.” His voice is deep, calm, and composed. How can he be so normal when you’re on the brink of losing your mind?
Your face scrunches up in indignation before you erupt in tears once again, practically screaming. “Fuck you! I hate you! I hate you!”
“Y/N.” He calls your name repeatedly.
“Y/N-”
“Shut the fuck up you asshole!”
“Y/N,” his voice becomes more stern with everytime he calls your name, but you don’t let him get a word in. You keep screaming at him, calling him every name in the book of insults, shaking him off every time he goes near you.  
When he attempts to sit by you, you violently push him away. “Go away! I’m not a little kid anymore! I don’t fucking need you anymore! I’m gonna be single forever because of you! If you don’t want me to be single forever then just fucking leave and never come back!” 
You’re aware that your words are horrible, but the overwhelming sense of embarrassment and shame erupting in your system prevents any rational train of thoughts from developing in your mind. You’re embarrassed and devastated that Jungkook doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, and it sends you spiraling.
He attempts to calm you once more by sitting on your bed, but you push him even more violently. “Don’t fucking touch me! I’m never gonna find love because of you! Just fucking die, just leave forever if-”
He staggers on his feet, caught off balance from the force of your push, and for the first time in his life Jungkook yells at you.  
“Y/N!”
Giving you no time to say or think anything, he seats himself on your makeup chair, tattooed hand gripping onto its top rail. “Y/N,” he scowls deeply at you, features blanketed in exasperation,  “We’ll talk about this later, but you need to calm the fuck down. You’re hurting me when you talk like that.”
Your eyebrows furrow deeply in horror, your cheeks tear-stained and your eyes filled with sorrow. The haunting realization of what you just said settles into your system. Your quivering lips barely enunciate your words. “Kook, I’m so sorry,” you blubber out. “I shouldn’t have said that, I didn’t mean it. I promise I didn’t mean it!” You shoot up, stumbling over your own feet and collapsing onto the floor. You’re a mess. Your face glistens with a layer of your own snot, and your hair is matted and tangled, the result of the countless times you tugged at it during this interaction. 
Unbeknownst to you, there's a red blotch near the lower hem of your T-shirt, and droplets of blood escape you and drip onto the floor as you stumble out of bed.  Jungkook notices though, eyebrows pinching in concern as a very disturbed expression morphs on his face when you collapse to your knees, your trembling hands holding onto him for support. “I’m so sorry. Please don’t leave. Please don’t leave. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it! It’s all my fucking fault!”
Jungkook doesn’t say anything. 
“I’m so sorry, Jungkook,” you sniffle. “I’m so sorry I said that. That was so horrible of me. Please don’t die. I’m so sorry.”
A sigh of vexation leaves his lips, but nonetheless he remains patient, compassionate towards  the devastation that consumes your face. “I’m not gonna die.” He cups your face with his tattooed hand, and uses his thumb to wipe the idle tears on your face.  “I forgive you. It’s okay.” 
“Promise? Promise it’s okay? I’m so sorry,” you cry even more, desperately latching onto his hands, using the side of his fingers to wipe your eyes.  
“It’s okay,” he confirms, tilting your head upwards before wiping your face with a makeup wipe from your vanity. “‘M really tired. I’m gonna go get your pads then I’ll be back. 
You sniffle. “Okay. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.” The smile he gives you is forced, and it makes you feel horrible.
He motions his head towards your bed. “Get some sleep. I’ll wake you up when I come back.”
You tiredly listen to his words, getting under your covers and holding onto your Snorlax plush. “Good night Kook.”
“Night,” he says, somewhat emotionlessly, flickering the lights off and vacating your room. 
-
Horrible. You wake up with puffy eyes, infinite eye boogers, and an awful pit in your stomach. The memories of last night come flooding in and you immediately check your phone to see if Jungkook texted you. There’s nothing there. 
Why would he want to talk to you after what you did?
You decide to send him a text message to further emphasize how sorry you are. 
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You throw your phone on the bed and scream into the stomach of Snorlax. 
Dry. He’s being so fucking dry and it’s all your fault. 
The next few weeks are spent with you attempting to redeem yourself. 
-
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You have no idea why you’re in front of Jungkook’s work, let alone with a lunchbox cake in hand. Begrudgingly, you stumble inside the tall building, awkwardly smiling when you come face to face with the sweet old security man. Jungkook’s work place is fancy as hell. Every floor of the tower hosts the office of an aristocratic company. There are even enormous, airport-esque x-ray machines stationed towards the entrance. You have to walk through a metal detector to be granted access into the building.
“Why hello, young lady! What business do you have here today?” 
“Um, I have a cake for someone. H-he works at HYBE Tech Solutions.”
“Alright, go ahead and put your bag and belongings here,” he says, motioning towards the tray on the X-ray machine conveyor belt. You watch as your belongings pass through the machine and come out on the other end. Then, you step through the metal detector, holding your arms up to be properly inspected. You bid the security man goodbye and walk towards the elevator. 
An ominous feeling of stupidity washes over you as you press your fingers onto the elevator buttonsYou feel stupid. You feel dumb. You feel silly. You would never do this for a man, but here you are. 
You take a deep breath before you stumble in, coming face to face with the lady that works at the front desk. Your eyes settle on the badge on her blouse. Dorothy. You vaguely remember Jungkook ranting about this woman, venting about how she crossed professional and ethical boundaries-  often sneakily creeping her fingers up his chest while they spoke and even going as far as to dig into the company’s database for his personal information. 
You clear your throat. “Hi, how’s your day been?”
“I’m great! Thanks for asking, hun. How can I help you today?” She asks, voice bubbly and uplifting, perfect for customer service.  
“Oh! Um- I have something for Jungkook. He works in the tech department.”
Her bubbly and friendly atmosphere immediately diminishes, and she raises her eyebrows at you before eyeing you conspicuously. With a vacuous expression, she picks up the landline, pressing her thin fingers into the numbers. “Hey, can you let Jungkook know that there’s a child here for him?”
You purse your lips at that, rocking back and forth on your heels. You try to avoid eye contact with this woman by looking elsewhere- pupils frantically darting to the daisies on the front desk or  the grandfather clock that sits idly against the beige walls- but she’s persistently staring you down. 
Thank God Jungkook appears from the end of the hallway. 
He sports a light blue button up and brown slacks, a stack of papers in his tattooed hand while the other rakes through his short hair. He looks delicious as ever and clearly Dorothy agrees because she practically moans as he walks down the hallway.
“Y/N?” He narrows his eyes in your direction, confirming that it’s really you.
“Um hi Kook. I brought you something.” You use two hands to present the styrofoam box to him.
Jungkook’s eyes scan from the lunchbox to you. He places the stack of papers on the front desk before accepting the box and popping open its lid. “A cake?” he questions, and you nod shyly, fidgeting in place. 
“Thanks,” he plainly says, giving you an awkward smile before his eyes dart towards Dorothy, who is intensely scrutinizing the interaction. There is tension in the atmosphere, and Dorothy’s presence isn’t helping. 
He clears his throat. “You didn’t have to, you should be studying,” he says, his words a little more light-hearted this time.
You shake your head. “I wanted to do this for you. I’m sorry for last night, Koo.”
He stares at you before letting a sigh escape his lips. “t’s okay Y/N. Told you I‘m not mad. We’ll talk about this later.”
You twiddle with your fingers, your puppy eyes flickering towards him. 
“Hug?” he asks, cutting the tension, tilting his head while he holds his arms open. You pout, nodding before running into his arms. He holds you tight, and whispers into the top of your head so Dorothy wouldn’t catch heed of the conversation. “You made me sad last night, you know.”
“‘I’m sorry.”
“‘It's okay. I can never be mad at you for too long,” He subtly releases you from his embrace and pinches your cheek. “Now go home, okay?”
You take a step back and offer a nod. And for some reason, Jungkook feels that you’re looking at him as if you’ll never see him again. “Enjoy your cake.” 
Jungkook smiles back, waving you goodbye. You turn to the office lady, who quickly averts her eyes once you notice her blatant eavesdropping. “Thank you auntie. Have a nice day!”
Jungkook has to physically restrain himself from laughing.
-
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A heart emoji. Butterflies erupt in your stomach at his most insignificant actions.  You hold your phone to your chest and bite back a smile. 
Loud music booms and vibrates through the walls of this massive mansion. There’s a huge pool, complete with a waterslide and waterfalls spilling into the pool. You’re surrounded by tons of other like-minded college kids, clad in nothing but a white lace bikini. You’re able to acknowledge that it isn’t the most tasteful outfit, but you feel good and you look good. 
After jumping in the pool and violently pelting water balloons at each other (effectively scaring away all the hoes), you and Yunjin lie under a cabana mindlessly scrolling through your phones. You only look up from your phone when you sense Yunjin holding up her phone for a selfie. Jungkook would have rolled his eyes at the sight.
“Can I show you something?” you abruptly blurt out, eliciting a cynical look from your friend. “Is it bad?”
You immediately shake your head, composing your posture so you can properly show Yunjin your texts with Jungkook. Her eyes rapidly scan over the phone in moments and she shoots you a sly glance. 
“So do you think?-”
“I don’t know… but I really, really, really hope that it means something. I don’t want him to see me as a little kid anymore, you know?” Bashfully, you smile at her, your demure expression a complete juxtaposition to your practically naked figure. 
Yunjin cups your cheeks making your glossy lips pouty. “Y/N! You’re about to pull Jungkook!”
“I am?”
“Yes you are-”
Yunjin flinches dramatically when a harsh stream of water unexpectedly drenches you. You both whip your head to the culprit in question: Beomgyu standing directly in front of you with a massive water gun. 
“You bitch!” Yunjin shoots up and runs after him with you rapidly following your partner in crime’s lead. But as you’re running towards Beomgyu (who maniacally screams and dashes), another stream hits you from the back.
The second culprit. Soobin. You sprint towards, latching your claws onto his white T-shirt him while you tug him towards the pool. “Wait Y/N! I just dried off. I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” 
No mercy for this bitch.
You position yourself behind him, using your whole body to push him into the pool. Splash! You jump and squeal in excitement when he emerges from the water wiping his face with his hands. You laugh hysterically in his face, childishly pointing your finger at him, finding it even more hilarious when he gives you the stink eye. “That’s what you get, asshole!-“
You pause and shriek in horror.
Somebody just pulled on the strings of your bikini top, exposing your boobs to the entire party.
You instinctively crouch, shoving your chest into your knees.The gasp of horror that leaves Soobin’s lips mirrors yours, and he immediately springs into action, rapidly lifting himself from the pool and sprinting after whatever asshole just violated you.
“Y/N!” Your savior, Yeonjun appears in front of you, crouching to your level. He rapidly rids himself of his shirt and pulls it over your entire figure. “You’re good, you’re good,” he whispers calmly to you, trying to prevent you from having a full blown panic attack. You stand up reticently, folding your arms over your chest, eyes trained on the ground and only looking at Yeonjun’s feet to gauge which direction you’re heading in.
“You okay?” Yeonjun settles under the cabana. “That guy is such a dick,” he mutters to himself. 
You nod and sink into the cushion of the outdoor-couch. “I’m so fucking embarassed.”
Attempting to salvage the situation, Yeonjun immediately shakes his head. “No, no. Nobody saw anything.” You shoot him a skeptical look, knowing damn well everybody in the party saw your bare boobs. 
“Is that Jungkook?”
You immediately whip your head towards the left, and indeed Jungkook is walking your way. You can’t believe he’s real. All heads whip in his direction as he makes his way towards you. He flicks his head back to prevent hair from falling in front of his eyes, barefoot, black T-shirt, and gray shorts. He looks so handsome you can’t even comprehend it. 
“Y/N!” He shouts, quicklyducking under the roof of the cabana before he positions himself in front of you. He inhales and exhales deeply, the blistering sun forming particles of sweat on his forehead. 
You look up at him and your heart melts. The sheen of sweat on his face, the way his eyes fixate on you. Your heart skips a beat. You want to cry. Again. Out of embarrassment, and how emotional you become at Jungkook’s mere presence.   
You bury your head into your knees, making Jungkook's eyebrows pinch. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
Yeonjun opens his mouth, hesitatingly glancing at you to confirm if telling Jungkook is okay.
You shoot up and practically catapult yourself onto Jungkook, latching onto him like a Koala. “Nothing happened,” you say, nuzzling your face into his shirt. “Come swim with me. Please.” 
Jungkook sighs, using his large palm to tame your frizzy stray hairs. “Y/N. We need to go home.”
You cock your head in confusion.“Wait why?”
His voice becomes oddly stern. “Y/N. It’s important and we have to go home.”
“To your place or mine?”
“My place. Just follow me.”
You haven’t a clue as to why Jungkook is behaving so urgently, but you follow him nonetheless. You pick up your purse and give Yeonjun a quick hug, running after Jungkook who cooly breezes past everyone, not a single person missing the hot guy who suddenly showed to the party. 
Jungkook opens his car door for you and allows you to step in. 
“Jungkook… is something going on?”
“Yes, there is,” he says grimacing slightly, shutting the door for you before he climbs into the driver’s seat. 
This nauseating anxiety bubbles inside you and sends chills up your spine, making you flinch when Jungkook closes the car door on his side. Jungkook doesn’t say anything, just looks behind his shoulder to reverse from his parking spot before zooming out of there. 
“Is this because of what happened the other night?” you ask, and he glances at you quickly. 
“No, it isn’t.”
“Well.. are we going to talk about it?” you push, twiddling with your fingers. 
Jungkook shakes his head, noticing your trembling fingers in his peripheral view. He reaches over and puts his hand on top of yours. “Not now.” 
You don’t respond, shifting in confusion.
“Here,” Jungkook starts, throwing his phone in your lap, “You can play whatever song you want.”
You purse your lips and silently nod. 
Sooner or later, you arrive at Jungkook’s apartments, and he leads you up the stairs and sits you on his black leather couch. 
He cups your face with both hands, caressing the apples of your cheek with his thumbs. With your eyebrows pinched, you peer into Jungkook’s eyes, conveying your confusion through your scrunched facial features. 
“Y/N, before I tell you what I want to tell you, I want you to take a few breaths. Just know that I’m always here for you.”
You nod steadily, pretty facial features still crinkled in confusion. 
“Y/N, your parents were in a car accident, and they didn’t make it.”
“What?”
And as the haunting realization settles into your system, all you can remember are your shrieks of terror echoing throughout his apartment and the way Jungkook holds you against his body while he wipes your tears and assuages your loud cries. 
-
The few days that proceed are a blur, but Jungkook takes care of you and is far more attentive than he ever has been. You cling onto him like fragile glass ornament hanging from a delicate thread- like he was all you had left because he was all you had left. He was your spring solace after a harsh winter, and the way he treated you indicated as much.
Jungkook works from home so you aren’t alone. For the entire day, you sit on his bed and watch him work. You eavesdrop on his meetings, falling asleep to the sound of his voice and whenever you wake up Jungkook ensures that he feeds you, constantly worried about your inability to eat. 
You’re queasy just thinking about going back to your house, so your daily and nightly attire consist of pieces from Jungkook’s wardrobe. You haven’t verbally acknowledged what has happened- not ready to talk about the death of your parents. You’re just trying to survive, and you feel like you’re barely making it. 
Thankfully, all your friends and family have been extremely helpful trying to get you through your grief. Jungkook’s mother stays with you for a few days, and after that Yunjin sleeps over with you for a few days- but you know that a piece of your heart has been ruthlessly ripped form you.
“Y/N, you need to take a shower,” Jungkook expresses, obstructing your view of the TV. His toothbrush hangs from his mouth, toothpaste residue bubbling around the perimeter of his lips. You owlishly blink at him, observing how his expression hardens at your look of indifference. 
You scoot towards the left end of the couch, hoping to get a clear view of Ever After High projected on his flat screen TV. 
“Y/N you haven’t showered in three days,” Jungkook interjects, “Please take a shower.”
“I will. Later.”
He pushes up his glasses, staring at you with intense disapproval. “Y/N,” he says sternly, trying to be gentle despite his qualms. 
You acquiesce, pouting at him. “Okay, fine. Later.”
His frown deepens. “Y/N.”
You chew on your bottom lip, deeply contemplating what Jungkook has asked of you. His large frame remains frozen in front of you. No matter how you position yourself on the couch, he renders you unable to watch the princesses prance around on the TV.
“Okay… but will you at least come with me? I don’t want to be without you.”
Jungkook pauses. 
“I don’t mean like getting in with me, but will you just sit on the toilet and talk to me?” You ask, sinking into the leather of his sofa and using your sweater paws to sweep your hair back. 
“Yea, I’ll do that.”
Once you step in the shower, you close the curtains, and strip yourself from your clothes, handing the pile of clothes to Jungkook. You turn on the water, yelping at the sensation on your body. Jungkook was right. You needed this and you kind of do smell like butthole. 
“Wait Y/N, do you want me to go to your house and get you underwear?” 
After folding up your (his) T-shirt and boxers, he notices that you haven’t been wearing any undergarments. 
“No!” you call back, “I don’t want you to go there! Not yet,” you call back. 
“Then do you want me to buy you some?” he responds, placing the folded clothes on the bathroom counter. 
“Um, maybe we can order some on Amazon.”
“Just send me the link and I’ll place the order.”
“Okay.”
A wave of silence washes over the bathroom, and you peek your head from the shower curtain to see what Jungkook’s up to: scrolling on Instagram. On his screen is some instagram model’s bikini pic, his fingers pausing on the screen so he can look at the photo.  
“Who is that?” you ask, making Jungkook jump in his seat. 
“What the- Y/N, just take your shower!” Jungkook feigns annoyance but can’t help himself but scoff in amusement at how petty you can be.
“Is she prettier than me?” you ask, glaring at Jungkook with disapproval. 
Jungkook purses his lips and tugs the shower curtain past your face and holds it against the wall, preventing you from peeking your pretty head past the curtain. He holds it there for a good minute, unfazed by the thrashing against the shower curtain. 
Swish. 
You swipe open the shower curtain from the other side. Your eyes bore into Jungkook’s and Jungkook thinks you’re foolish not to realize how alluring and sultry you are. Your bare body is akin to a sculpture of the goddess Aphrodite. Water drips from the crevices of your body and you gaze at him with anticipation etched onto your face. You’re just standing there, but your posture is so seductive- or maybe it’s just the natural curvature of your body. 
“Why don’t you join me?” your sweet voice makes his Adam's apple bob in his throat. 
When he doesn’t respond, your features morph into humiliation, regret consuming you. You nod your head. “Sorry Kook, I’ll just-”
“Y/N, you’re gorgeous. Any man can see how lovely you are. Honestly, you take my breath away every time I see you,” Sensing the trepidation on your face, he solidifies his claim, “I mean it Y/N. You’re beautiful, and I want to join you but I’m not going to. You’re hurting right now and I don’t want to do anything to take advantage of you.”
And he isn’t lying, he yearns for every kind of contact with you, but he’s not going to go through with this. Not when you’re traumatized from the death of your parents. Not when you’ve been so unhinged for the past week, refusing to even shower. 
You stare at him for a second, dazy eyed and your eyes darting around the room. “Okay Jungkook. I’m sorry.”
He smiles sweetly at you and gently closes the shower curtain. “It’s okay Y/N. I’m gonna head to my room. You’re welcome to come visit me anytime.”
-
Boys’ night. Jungkook being the handsome stud he is, happens to have friends that are also handsome studs. Jungkook offered to postpone boys’ night but you declined his attempts to make you more comfortable. Jungkook has exerted so much effort to take care of you. There’s no reason for him to forgo time with his best friends. Besides, you can always hide in your room. 
You crack your door open slightly ajar, peeking through the crack to spy on Jungkook and his friends. Antisocial is the perfect word to describe you. 
The sound of the doorbell ringing was your cue to lock yourself in your room. Jungkook knocked a few times, but you were too scared of other people that you didn’t even grace him with a response. 
Clearly Jungkook got the message because he opted to leave a greasy piece of pizza outside your door, sending you a quick text message about it.
You just wanted to scout the scene, see who was there. Mingyu, Taehyung, Jimin, and Namjoon. Soju bottles are scattered around the table, and there’s some music blaring from the TV. You’ve met everyone here a few times- they all know you, but you aren’t close with Jungkook’s friends like he is with your friends. 
“Oh Y/N! Come join us!” You freeze at Mingyu’s words, and all eyes in the room whip towards your direction.
 “Umm..” you close the door gently and leap into the safety of your bed.
You overhear their banter through the wooden door. “Hey! Why are you making little kids uncomfortable!” Jimin yells, slapping Mingyu on the neck. 
Your lip quivers, and you inhale deeply, gathering the courage to step outside of the room. You quickly put on deodorant, and step out stealthily, taking a seat next to Namjoon on the couch. No one seems to notice you, and you tap on his shoulder. Namjoon whips his head towards you, the confusion on his face melting into fondness. 
“Hi,” you squeak out, fiddling with your fingers. 
“Hi Y/N,” Namjoon greets, the kindness laced in his voice assuaging the trepidation bubbling on your inside. Jungkook’s red lava lamp  illuminates the room with shades of crimson, and your eyes flutter shut when a ray of light shines on your face. 
“Are you okay?” Namjoon inquires, holding his hand up to shield you from the light.  
“Yea, I’m fine,” you blink a few times. You don’t say anything, just awkwardly take a bite of your pizza while your eyes dart around the room. 
Namjoon doesn’t seem to know what to say to you either, so the two of you just sit and eat pizza in silence. For a moment, your eyes lock. You owlishly blink at him and he blinks at you for a good minute.  
But then, to your surprise, Namjoon sets his pizza down, opening his arms. Your features scrunch up, and you let yourself melt into his warm embrace, glossy tears rolling down your face. 
“I’m so sorry about what happened,” he expresses, gently caressing the back of your head with his palm. You sniffle. “t’s okay,” you sob, “but I’m so sad. I don’t know what I’m going to do.”
“You’ll get through this. We’re always here for you.”
His words invoke a tornado of intense feelings in your system, and your strong facade crumbles as you become vulnerable in Jungkook’s friend’s embrace. By this point, everyone has noticed your presence, and suddenly the night becomes about you. 
After wiping your tears with the back of your hand, you find yourself sitting in between Jungkook and Namjoon in a “friendship circle”. It’s quite cute that these grown men still sit criss-cross applesauce in a circle, but you’re overjoyed that you’re welcome to the group. 
“I brought you a cake Y/N,” Taehyung announces, handing you a lunchbox cake. With your doe eye, you look towards him before opening the lid of the cake. A lunchbox cake with Snorlax’s face iced on the top.  “Jungkook mentioned that you really liked Pokemon, so I thought you’d find this cute,” he continues, slightly trailing off.  You’re Strong! Is what it reads, and you fall into pieces, your features crumpling up before you burst into tears. 
Jungkook laughs in fondness at the vulnerability of your reaction, wrapping a single arm around your frame. 
“Th-thank you,” you sniffle, offering Taehyung a crooked smile. “Can we eat it together? I don’t want to get f-fat.”
At that, a chorus of no’s echo through the room, and you giggle a bit. 
Your heart is incredibly full. Family. Friends. People who care about you. This is something your soul desires, something your soul needs. 
The night meets its unfortunate end, and you stand in front of Jungkook as you bid his friends goodbye. Before the boys walk away, you find your fingers clinging onto the hem of Jimin’s oversized shirt. Before he ventures off, he turns around and graces you with an endearing look of confusion. “What’s up?”
“Can I come with you?” you spout. 
“You want to sleep over at our place?” Jimin questions, gingerly scratching the back of his head. 
You shake your head steadily, “I just want to talk to you,” you clarify, gazing up at him shyly. Jimin’s eyes dart towards Jungkook’s for approval and Jungkook nods his head. “Go ahead. I’ll give you guys privacy,” he pinches your cheek affectionately before closing the door. You stand on your tiptoes, peeking through the window of the apartment to ensure that Jungkook isn’t eavesdropping. 
Jimin leans against the railings, observing you carefully. 
You tug on the hem of Jimin’s tee, urging him to follow you to the lobby of Jungkook’s apartment. He follows in your stead, not questioning you until your actions pause. You shift around uncomfortably for a bit, and you look up at him. Taking a deep breath, you find the courage to ask him the question that’s been lingering in the back of your mind. 
 “Do you think Jungkook and I could ever.. be a thing?” you finally question, shifting your weight between your feet, a crimson sheen sweeping over your cheeks. 
Jimin’s eyebrows pinch, and he repeatedly opens and closes his mouth, looking for the right words to say. “Like romantically?”
Your eyes cumbersomely drift towards the painting behind Jimin. “Y-yea. I really like him, and I want him to be my boyfriend- and I know he’s attracted to me but won’t act on his feelings because of his ethical qualms,” you stutter out, pursing your lips after seeing how Jimin’s face morphs into astonishment. 
“Well, I don’t think Jungkook is seeing anyone right now- but Y/N, if I’m going to be totally honest, I don’t think you and Jungkook being a romantic pair would be appropriate. I mean, he’s known you since you were a kid. Even if he does like you, I don’t think he would cross those boundaries.” he very gently explains, meticulously finding the correct wording to not hurt your feelings. 
You bite your lip bitterly, sinking into the realization of his assertion. “Yea, you’re right. I don’t know. I guess it’s just a stupid crush,” you dismiss your confession with a wave and offer Jimin a shy smile. 
Jimin pouts at your invalidation of your own feelings. “Don’t say that. I know you’ll find someone who cherishes and loves you. Someone you deserve,” he asserts. You smile at him, nodding before he ruffles your hair and leads you back up the stairs. 
Someone you love. 
Would you ever find it in yourself to love anybody that wasn’t him? Jungkook has successfully monopolized your heart, your soul, your very being. 
Ping!
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-
Tonguing his cheek, Jungkook impatiently and abruptly brakes at a red light, accelerating rapidly when the light turns green. He changes from his casual clothes to a black sleeveless shirt, loose leather pants, and a beanie. Mingyu sits on the passenger seat, frantically typing on his laptop as Jungkook zooms down the highway at record pace. 
Breaking into a frat house to terrorize some dumb college kids definitely wasn’t a part of the plan tonight, but Jungkook was down for some last minute terrorism.
“So what are you gonna do? Threaten the kid? Call the cops?”Taehyung questions from the backseat, both hands gripping on the headrest of Mingyu and Jungkook’s seats. 
“Look, I’m really trying to not sound corny, but I’m going to torture him,” Jungkook enunciates, which evokes a few seconds of silence. 
“This bitch-”
“He’s lost his fucking mind,” Mingyu mumbles. 
Jungkook laughs to himself, amused by the comments of his friends. Jungkook is an intelligent, rational person. Normally, he wouldn’t take it this far but he deems it extremely necessary for this particular situation. 
“What the- now he’s creepily laughing to himself-”
“If we tell Y/N about this she’s going to be scared of you,” Mingyu abruptly comments, shooting Jungkook a pointed look. 
Jungkook pauses, seemingly deeply considering the utterance of his friend, toying with his lip ring for a while he finally makes a comment. “I won’t do anything bad. I’ll just intimidate him a little.”
His friends sigh, not pressing further on the matter because Mingyu and Taehyung were pissed off too. Instead, Mingyu rolls down the windows of the car, allowing the breeze of the cool night to consume the interior of the car. 
Jungkook considers this very night a milestone in your healing process. You isolated yourself in his apartment for two consecutive weeks, your grief severely limiting your social capacity and ability to normally interact with people. His friends were privy to your situation, purposely not coming to Jungkook’s home out of respect for you. But tonight, the color that reappeared in your aura overwhelmed his heart with joy.
While you were on the couch, talking to Namjoon about something, Jungkook got an alarming text from one of your friends- Yeonjun. Jungkook is cool with your friends, but not close enough to be sending private text messages, so his eyes brows pinch in concern when he sees the notification pop up from his phone. 
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Mingyu’s eyes drifted towards Jungkook, who was noticeably brimming with indignation. Jungkook scoffed to himself, a macabre smirk on his lips before he laughed erratically at the message. He repeatedly wiped his face with his hand, chuckling in amusement. Jungkook discreetly passed his phone to Mingyu without a word, with Taehyung looking over his shoulder, both of them gasping at the message.
This whole time, you were oblivious to the scheme Jungkook was contriving and Jungkook intended to keep it that way. You were carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, and Jungkook would cut his limbs off to lessen that burden. The indignation and resentment bubbling within him threatens to erupt because he’s so fucking pissed off. 
You’re everything to him, and the thought of you being violated makes him want to indulge in his violent impulses.  He can’t imagine how you would feel knowing that video spread around, and usually he would confide with you about these things but right now he needs to sweep this under the rug and make sure it never comes back up. 
Luckily, he and Mingyu both have degrees in computer engineering and know how to hack into technical infrastructures. 
Jungkook pulls up to the frat house, rolling the window down steadily before he rests his elbow on the ledge of the window. He sits there for a second, toying with his lip ring while his eyes bore into the interior of the house. He’s sure he looks creepy as hell- just staring into the house.
After a few minutes of waiting in silence, some guy arises from the house and approaches the car. 
Jungkook keeps his lips sealed until he’s close enough to perceive his features. 
“Uh is there something yall need?” the guy asks, innocently scratching the back of his head. 
“Yea,” Jungkook responds, voice firm and somewhat chilling, “Your name Josh?”
“Yea? What’s up-”
Jungkook kicks the door open, knocking Josh over until he’s rolled on the floor, clutching his leg as he shrieks in pain. 
“Oh shit, are we really doing this?” Taehyung mutters before joining Jungkook outside the car. 
Jungkook sits on top of Josh, continuously punching the shit out of him before he spits on the kid’s face. He uses a single hand to lift him by the collar, and violently pushes him against the car. “You mad Y/N rejected you? So you pulled that shit?” Jungkook menaces, his face centimeters away from Josh’s. 
Josh whimpers, crying- too horrified to coherently respond. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” he pleads, tears and snot streaming down his ugly face. 
“Shut the fuck up!” Jungkook repeatedly bangs Josh against the car. “I’m gonna say this shit once and I’m not going to repeat myself,” he seethes, satisfied by the way Josh whimpers and nods his head pathetically. 
“You’re not shit. You’ll never ever be good enough for Y/N. You’re the same as the shit on the bottom of my shoe,” he breathes against Josh’s face, who whimpers and cries, “If I ever see you messing with Y/N ever again- I will ruin your whole life.”
Josh nods, unable to do anything else. 
“Got it?” Jungkook seethes, pushing Josh’s head against the car door.
“Got it!”
“Good. We’re going inside, and you guys are going to watch us go through all of your iClouds, and we’re going to delete every single copy of the video there is, alright?”
“Yes! Yes! That’s fine! I’m sorry!”
Jungkook scoffs in amusement at his despicable demeanor, before he throws Josh on the ground and enters the house. 
“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” Mingyu mumbles, following Jungkook’s lead into the house.
-
You anxiously wait for Jungkook to return home, absentmindedly toying with the Switch to distract from the hysterical thoughts frantically racing through your mind. You’ve done everything you could to distract yourself, your restless heart aching to do something of substance.
 You’ve been isolating yourself from society for the past month simply because you can’t bring yourself to leave Jungkook’s home, as if it was your safe haven. 
You dread the moment you have to return to your home, memories of your family coming to mind. You’ve been trying to avoid thinking about everything, and you reckon that it’s time to process everything. There are aspects of grief that you find unfathomable- questions you have that make you want to throw up. 
What will happen to the home that holds the memories of your family within its walls? How will you assimilate back into society without your father, without your mother? You’re not confident that it will ever be the same, and your heart sinks into your stomach at the notion- but you have to be resilient; you have to face it. 
It feels worse to avoid the reality of your life than to face it head on. 
You’re pulled from your thoughts by the sound of the doorknob turning. 
“Jungkook!” The way you call his name is breathless, and his eyebrows pinch in concern when you pounce on him. Nonetheless, he allows you to nuzzle into his embrace and he soothingly rubs your back- like he always does. 
“Wasn’t gone that long,” Jungkook absentmindedly comments. 
“I know- just missed you. I’m sorry for being clingy,” you murmur, to which Jungkook shakes his head at the absurdity of your words. 
“Not at all. Stay here for as long as you want. I’ll take you with me wherever I go,” he adds, settling into the leather of his sofa. You shuffle after him like a cute little penguin, sitting your ass directly next to Jungkook despite the vacant empty space on your right side. 
“Then am I allowed to sit next to you?” 
Jungkook’s features crinkle up in amusement, nose scrunching as he laughs lightly at how cute you are. He pinches your cheek, “It’s one thousand dollars for every minute you’re within a five foot radius of me,” he comments, tone stoic and firm. 
He doesn’t have to look in your direction to visualize the way your pretty lips fall open, swatting at his bicep for his cruel words. “Jungkook, I don’t have that money! You know I only have 35 cents in my bank account!”
“Okay, then go sit over there,” Your eyes follow the trail of his pointed finger, the corner of the room. 
“Fine! You fucking asshole,” you mutter bitterly, jumping up from the couch and stomping away with a hmph, until Jungkook slyly wraps his hand around the circumference of your wrist and pulls you to him. You collapse onto the couch, your back against his chest, and your butt between his legs. 
He clings onto you, almost suffocating you with the way he wraps his arms around you, grabbing his elbows as he locks his arms over your head. “‘M just kidding- you know that. I can’t survive without my baby either, y’know?”
Your chest erupts with butterflies, and you hold onto his forearm with both of your hands. “I know.”
-
The next day, you return to school. Your professors were so empathetic and understanding to the nuance and confusion of your situation, allowing you to complete your coursework from the comfort of Jungkook’s home. 
Grief isn’t a linear process. Though you’ve found it in you to return to school, it’s the mundane and the typical that you’re becoming increasingly bothered by. 
No one in your Philosophy class is paying attention to this movie, clearly. You can tell by the lit up screens scattered within the clusters of students, and you aren’t diligent enough to not be one of those students, doodling flowers and Snorlax’s on your paper. 
For the second you do look up at the movie, your heart stops. It’s always the most mundane, irrelevant details that get to you. The scene barely occupies a minute and it makes your chest tighten in the worst way possible. 
The main character walks down the wedding aisle, her arm linked with her father’s. The haunting realization settles in your system- you will never ever experience that. You begin hyperventilating, your hand crumpling the paper, and you quickly rest your forearms on the table before shoving your face into your forearms. People are already looking at you and you can’t fathom the humiliation so you stay like that until class is dismissed. 
You finally lift your head, rubbing your eyes to adjust the blinding ceiling lights. 
“Hey, are you okay?”
You shriek at the unexpected voice and whip your head to the left. 
“Hey hey hey- I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you,” he breathes out, rolling his chair towards you before rolling back so as to not scare you further. 
“No no, you’re good,” you breathe out, inhaling and exhaling to bring you down from your petrified high. “Just having a shitty day,” you explain, sweeping away the hair dried to your face by your tears. 
He seems to be unable to conjure a proper response, peering at you with an empty gaze and you sink in your seat, feeling the need to further explain yourself. “Well there was that part in the movie where Emma got married, and that made me feel horrible because I recently lost my dad.. And my mom.”
“Wait, I’m sorry. You don’t have to explain yourself to me,” he articulates, “I just noticed you  haven’t been in class for a while and was kinda worried when I saw you crying. I’m sorry if I pushed your boundaries.”
“You know me?”
His lips tug up in embarrassment as he gingerly scratches the back of his neck. “Well we usually sit next to each other so I thought we formed an acquaintanceship or something,” he mumbles. 
“Oh I’m sorry,” you pout at him, “I usually tap out during class so I never noticed you. What’s your name by the way?” You shyly stick out your hand, and he gives you a straight lined smile before shaking your hand gently. 
“Sunghoon. I-I’m really sorry for your loss by the way,” he adds, and you find his nervousness quite endearing. You shyly smile at him, and he gazes back at you with similar amity. He ever so softly pulls your wrist towards his and scribbles his number onto your forearm. “Feel free to text me if you ever need help with homework. You missed a lot of school,” he offers, and you find yourself giggling at his forth forwardness. 
“Thanks Sunghoon."
-
When  Jungkook returns from work that night, the first thing he’s met with is you shoving your boots on, seemingly ready for a vivacious night out. Your figure is adorned with a white satin slip on dress, and your hair is put up in an elegant updo. Jungkook pauses, eyes settling on your figure before scanning up to your face; he thinks this is the first time he’s seen you with makeup on since he wiped away the mascara running down your cheeks the day he broke the news.
“Hey daddy,” you purr, “Where have you been? The kids have been waiting for you,” you giggle, sliding your mini purse down your arm. 
Jungkook narrows his eyes at you, humorously scoffing at your corny choice of words. 
You giggle, skipping towards him before jumping onto him, latching around his neck before you whisper in his ear. “‘m going out with my friends, don’t wait for me to get home because I might stay the night with Yunjin.”
Jungkook stiffens, remaining frozen while you back up from him. 
“So, do I look like an angel, or what?”
“Always look cute,” because despite the infesting irritation bubbling in his system, he would never not tell you how it is. You are cute, always cute, always like an angel. 
“Thanks,” you giggle, skipping towards the door but before you can skip past him, he latches onto your wrist. “Wait.”
You tilt your head, slightly confused. “I bought something for you.”
He digs in his backpack and pulls it out. Nipple pasties. “You never wear a bra, so I thought you’d be safer if you put these on before you go out.”
“You were the one who said I had small tits!”
“Okay, well you still have nipples- so at least put these on to keep you safe.”
You narrow your eyes at him, but he doesn’t back down. You snatch the pasties from his hand and march into the bathroom. “Fine!” 
Jungkook lounges on the couch, eyes trained on you before you bid him goodbye and skip out of his apartment. He inhales deeply to settle the erratic palpitations in his chest. He needs to stop being so protective of you. 
-
Your arms linked with Yunjin, you skip around from one club to the next, dancing and partying your little hearts out. When the night comes to a close you prance to the local ramen shop around your campus. From a distance, you can already make out Jungkook casually speaking with his friends. He’s always so animated when he’s with his friends, dramatically gesturing and hip thrusting in the air while his friends laugh at his immature jokes. He’s got a cigarette between his pointer and middle finger, taking slow puffs, allowing the smoke to fill his lungs before he tilts his head to exhale a long plume of smoke into the atmosphere. 
That’s right. Jungkook smokes occasionally but never lets you do it. What a hypocrite. 
His eyes drift off for a second until they land on you, and his lips curl up in your presence. 
“Well look, if it isn’t my favorite girl,” he teases, letting out low laughter at the way you crimson when all his friends’ heads whip in your direction. 
You narrow your eyes at him, giving him a dirty look that Jungkook cooes at. Even when you were trying to intimidate him you akin to a cute Snorlax, so adorable, eyebrows pinched and lips pouted- how could he feel anything but adoration at that? 
“Aw angel,” he jests, throwing your words right back at you, “Don’t ignore me, ‘m sorry for teasing you,” he catches you as you walk past him, pulling you towards his chest before resting his chin on top of your head. 
He casually smiles at Yunjin. “How’s my angel been doing? Has she been behaving?”
Yunjin’s jaw drops at the bold statement and you attempt to wrestle out of his firm embrace to berate him. 
Just kidding. It’s getting late, though. Do you girls need a ride home?” he asks, finally letting you go just for you to stumble out of his grip and almost land on your face, but luckily Jungkook pulls your shoulders back without even looking in your direction. 
“Jungkook, it’s literally 10,” you deadpan. 
“Oh c’mon, I don’t want you girls to get kidnapped or something,” he snarkily responds. 
“How about you give us some money instead?” Yunjin jests, clearly joking, but Jungkook takes it so, so seriously. He raises a brow at both of you. “How much do you need?”
“Wait no- I was kidding,” Yunjin quickly clarifies, her ears becoming slightly red, “you don’t have to..”
Jungkook looks from you to her, then back at you before whipping out his phone, taking another puff of his cigarette before blowing the smoke upwards, careful so you don’t inhale any smoke.
Ping!
Your eyebrows pinch in confusion when you get a notification, and you unzip your mini purse to grab your phone, allowing the screenlight to illuminate your pretty features.  
JEON JUNGKOOK HAS TRANSFERRED YOU 500 DOLLARS VIA HYBETRANSFER.
“250 each, alright?” Jungkook laughs, taking another puff of his cigarette before he saunters off, his friends pushing him around and teasing him. 
“Ayo, when did Jeon turn into a sugar daddy?”
You and Yunjin are left dumbfounded, even more so when Jungkook turns around and makes kissy lips at you. 
You fall to your knees. 
-
The next morning is the weekend.
You absentmindedly chomp on your cereal, eyes still crusty and mind still hazy from the morning daze. Jungkook arises from his bedroom, hair still messy and sticking out in various directions- but he still looks as handsome as ever, the tired and morning glow suiting him wondrously. 
“So, I’m planning a trip with my friends at the beach. We’ll stay in an AirBnb. You wanna come with?”
You pause, features crinkling up in confusion. “Which friends? The ones from last night or Mingyu and them?”
“Mingyu, Tae, Jimin, Namjoon,” he counts off, before shrugging, “I already planned to take you with me so it’s not like you have a choice anyways.”
You scoff to yourself in amusement. “Aren’t you being too forceful?”
Jungkook narrows his eyes and graces you with a look of skepticism. “So you don’t want to go? or..”
“No!” you rapidly interject as you shoot up, clearing your throat and regaining your composure at the way Jungkook smirks at you. 
You settle back into your seat. “I do want to go,” you exhale, “but do I have to pay for my own room or something? I’m broke.”
“Oh, I was just gonna have you stay in my room,” Jungkook responds, trailing off as he tries to detect any trace of apprehension on your features, “Is that alright with you?”
You don’t even realize you’re holding your breath until you breathlessly exhale. “That’s perfect.”
So that’s how you found yourself at the beach, in nothing but your black bikini, prancing around the waves with Taehyung.
“Jungkook watch!” you call as you swivel around towards Jungkook, who’s applying sunscreen to his legs, not really paying attention to what you were doing. 
You stand in front of the upcoming wave, holding your arms out as if you were going to embrace the wave. “I’m going to stand against the wave!”
At that, Jungkook whips his head upwards, eyebrows pinching in worry as he shoots up. “Tae! Get her! She’s gonna get swept in by-“
And on cue, the wave collapses over you and you tumble into the unwelcoming water. “Motherfuck-“ You thrash and scream, powerless against the unforgiving currents until a pair strong arms pull you from your armpits and drags you to the sand.
“Holy shit Y/N, are you alright?” Taehyung asks, crouching beside you as he pats your back, allowing you to cough the water up.
“Y/N that was so dumb,” you hear Jungkook’s voice as he approaches you, crouching beside you as he hands you his black steel water bottle. “Take a sip,” he urges, and you nod shakily, grasping the bottle with both hands before you take a sip from it.
“I’m okay. Thanks for saving me Taehyung,” you smile at him and he releases a sigh of relief. “You scared the shit out of us!”
You gulp down the water and close the cap, returning his bottle to him. “Sorry, I won’t do that again, but can we get back to playing now?” you smile as you playfully fling a ball of wet sand at Jungkook.
Jungkook closes his eyes on impact, scoffing in amusement before he grabs you by your legs, signalling  Taehyung to grab your arms before they both lift you and run into the ocean.
-
Jungkook waits outside your shared room, knuckles softly knocking on the wooden door. A towel loosely wrapped around his lower waist, water drips from every crevice on his body, but he can’t enter until you’re done changing.
“Oki! I’m done!” you call out, opening the door for him, a towel in your hand as you use it to scrunch up your damp hair. 
“Wow. You’re really muscular,” you giggle, fingers hovering over his abs before you look up at him for approval to feel, to which he gently pushes your head aside and waltzes into the room.
When he’s done changing he beckons you back to the room, and you plop in the king sized bed, belly down and legs swinging back and forth in the air. 
Jungkook lies down beside you, resting his head on the pillow as he scrolls aimlessly on his phone, only looking over when he hears your ringtone go off.
You answer the call almost immediately.
“Oh hey Sunghoon!” you greet, shooting up from the bed to touch up your appearance in the facetime camera.
Sunghoon. Jungkook knows all your friends and he hasn’t heard that name before.
“Hey Y/N, how’s your vacation going?” Sunghoon asks, and you take a seat at the desk, propping your phone up against the wall. You twirl an idle piece of hair around your fingers. “It’s really fun here, I feel great,” you explain, “so what’s up?”
“You look like you’re having fun- wait, is there someone in the room with you?”
You rapidly turn around and look at Jungkook, then tilt your phone at an angle where he isn’t visible. “Oh, he’s just a family friend, do you want me to go somewhere more private?”
“Oh no that’s cool, I was just wondering but I called to ask you about the homework…”
A family friend? Jungkook scowls at that. Wordlessly, he breezes past you and exits the room, closing the door and sits next to Jimin on the couch. 
Jimin takes a few moments to acknowledge Jungkook’s presence. “Hey, is there anything going on between you and Y/N?” Jimin finally asks, eyebrows furrowing in concern when he perceives Jungkook’s sour face. 
Jungkook pauses. “Why are you asking?”
Jimin shrugs. “I don’t know. Don’t you know she has a crush on you? Isn’t it inappropriate for you two to be sharing a room?” Jimin continues, nudging Jungkook with his elbow. 
At that, Jungkook buries his face into his palms. He’s let this go on for far too long. “I know,” Jungkook murmurs, voice projection muffled by his hands. 
“You know? The other day she asked me if it was possible between you two and I straight up told her that you wouldn’t go for it.”
Jungkook remains wordless at that, and he thinks he’s developed an idea of the reality of the situation. 
Jungkook was too scared to address the subject with you; he let it linger for far too long. He didn’t want to burden you with anything else besides what you already had on your plate, and you got in your head about it. He never explicitly stated that he more than reciprocates your feelings, leaving you dangling on a string. 
He’s going to fix that. 
“No Jimin, that’s not it,” Jungkook clarifies, wiping his face with his palms. “I like her too, and I’m going to tell her tonight,” he states firmly, slightly craning his head to gauge Jimin’s reaction. His reaction isn’t what Jungkook expected. Instead of a look of concern, worry, or horror, Jimin looks over the moon. 
“Well shit! I wish I knew that before! You guys look perfect together!” he exclaims before eagerly patting Jungkook on the back. 
Jungkook raises his eyebrows at his friend. “Really? Don't you think I should wait a little longer? Until she's ready?”, to which Jimin simply shakes his head.
“Y/N's an adult. She can handle herself. I thought you wouldn't go for it because of the age gap, though. I guess I shouldn't have told her that," he says gingerly, scratching the back of his head. ”Sorry Kook."
Jungkook doesn't say anything, seemingly in deep contemplation. "It used to bother me,” Jungkook clarifies, "but it doesn't anymore."
“So what’s wrong with it?"
That’s right. There is nothing wrong with it.
-
A cool night on the beach. You feel the cool breeze through your air, the lunar radiance of the moon illuminating the beach. You’re adorned in a lovely, summer-esque two piece set with floral patterns running along the fabric, The top piece is cropped and strapless, exposing your collar bones and belly button piercing, and the bottom piece is a long, flowy skirt that blows marvelously against the wind. 
You gingerly step outside the beach house, enjoying the cool sensation of the night breeze. The guys are all hanging out in the yard, soju bottles and beer cans scattered on the wooden benches positioned on the beach. Namjoon and Jimin are posted up on the benches, chowing down on meat whilst engaging in pretty animated conversation. You spot Mingyu and Taehyung running around the beach, slapping each other and chasing after each other, their dirty heels slipping against the coarse sand. 
Jungkook is stationed at the grill, frying meat for his friends. His tall and built figure is concealed by his loose black T-shirt and black sweat shorts that you have worn a few times during your extended stay at his place. 
You creep up behind him, swiping away the stray hairs that the wind blew into your face. Tapping him lightly on the back, you coyly skmile at him, a bashful glow illuminating your face. 
Jungkook sensed your presence the moment stepped foot from the house, but still acts like it’s the first time he’s ever seen you. He does a double take, eyes scanning up and down your face and body- you look so lovely and elegant in your little two piece set. “Hey,” Jungkook finally returns your greeting, a little breathless. 
“Can I have some?” you ask, pointing to the grill. 
“Uh yea, I actually made a plate for you a second ago,” Jungkook takes the prepared plate of your favorite meats, but pauses before he hands it to you. He hasn’t a clue if you’re doing this on purpose, but you’re looking at him with the sultriest of eyes, and it drives him crazy. His Adam’s Apple bobs in his throat, and he collects himself before handing you the plate. 
You tilt your head, sending him a look of confusion at his hesitance, but Jungkook sees it as a gateway to talk to you. “Y/N, can we talk? Like now?” Jungkook asks, rubbing at the nape of his neck. 
“Sure, what about?” you solicit, setting the plate on the table.
Jungkook immediately shoves his hands in his pockets, and motions his head towards the beach, obliging you to follow him. “About what you told me at your house..” he trails off, “that one time in the middle of the night,” he adds. 
He perceives the way your features morph into embarrassment, so he decides to take the lead on this conversation. He approaches you, standing beside you momentarily before smoothly lacing his fingers through yours. “Let’s go.”
Unable to conjure a proper response, you follow his footsteps in silence until your bodies appear as distant figures by the ocean. With your toes kissing the water washing up on shore, he turns back to look at you, fingers still intertwined. But you stop him before he can open his mouth. 
“Wait- Jungkook. Let me explain myself first,” you begin, thankful that the night sky conceals the obvious bashful glow on your cheeks. 
Jungkook who is seemingly expressionless nods his head, signaling you to let your words out. 
You gently pull your hand from his, twiddling with your fingers before you can speak. “Firstly, I just wanna apologize.. to you,” you begin, ignoring the way his nose scrunches in confusion, “I feel like you’ve been so good to me- you always take care of me. Your family is the only family I have left,” you continue, bashfully tucking an idle strand of hair behind your ear. 
“So I’m sorry for forcing myself on you, and I’m sorry for mistaking your care towards me as romantic affection,” you continue, subconsciously gesticulating with your hands. “I know you said you don’t like it when girls are clingy but I’ve been nothing but clingy, and you still take care of me and care about me.” Your words are passionate, and they’re true. “Everyone told me that a relationship with you would be inappropriate.. but I was too persistent and too selfish. I’m so sorry Kook. You must’ve been so shocked when I yelled at you and when I.. opened that shower curtain,” you finish, shaking your head in embarrassment. 
When you finally complete the sentiment, you tilt your head upwards to gauge his reaction. His eyebrows pinch in confusion, and his mouth is slightly agape. “What?” he asks breathlessly, eyebrows pinching even further. He runs a tired hand over his face. “Y/N- just- I can’t believe you said that. Y/N, I love you. And I don’t care if you’re clingy, and I don’t care what anybody else thinks of us.”
You gasp at his words, a profound sense of emotion absolutely overwhelming you.
“What I care about is what you think of me, and whether you’re happy,” His fingers find yours, and he holds your hand and looks right into your eyes to properly convey his sincerity. “Y/N, I’m so sorry for not telling you sooner. You were just going through so much shit and I didn’t know if you were in the right headspace or if you were even serious about how you felt for me-”
He stops when you yank your hands away from him, using the back of your hands to wipe the tears streaming down your face. The shapes of his eyes turn into little crescents, petrified at your reactions. He removes your hands from your face, holding your wrists. 
“Y/N, don’t cry. Please say something.”
“Jungkook, it’s too late. I-I don’t think I can do this- with you- I mean,” is all you’re able to say and Jungkook’s chest tightens impossibly.
His heart drops to your stomach, a crestfallen expression morphing onto his handsome features. “I-is that how you really feel?”
Another tear streams down your face and Jungkook itches to wipe it but suppresses that urge.
“I love you Jungkook. I do. I really do!” you cry out, “But I can’t date you, ever. I never want to lose you,” you sob between sniffles. “I’ve made up my mind. I’m sure of it!”
The situation is bitterly ironic. Jungkook spent months tiptoeing around his feelings, your feelings, because he wanted to ensure he was what you wanted. Even when you blatantly threw yourself at him, he made the conscious decision to not pursue you. He spent months deciding your feelings for you- and now you’re telling him you don’t want him and he can’t do anything but accept it. 
“Y/N, you’ll never lose me. I’ll always be here. Even if you change your mind.. I’ll always be here.”
“Jungkook, I lost my whole family. You’re all I have left,” you explain, trailing off a little bit, “If I lose you then I have nobody.”
“No, I swear- Y/N, you’re it for me, and I mean it.”
You sniffle, wiping your cheeks, eyes, and nose once more. “What- hiccup- does that mean?”
“It means… whatever you want it to mean,” he concludes. 
“Jungkook…” you trail off, “Don’t wait for me. If you find a girl you like, then you should go for her. All I want is for you to be happy. It’s what you deserve,” you offer him a soft smile, a direct juxtaposition to your tear stained cheeks.
His chest tightens at that and he shakes his head. “You’ll always be my priority. Me? I’ve dated enough girls, I can be single for the rest of my life.”
You immediately swat his chest at the sentiment. “No, Jungkook. You should be with someone who takes care of you, not someone you have to take care of all the time. I’ll just always be your family friend who had a stupid crush on you in college.” Your attempt to lighten the atmosphere is futile and makes Jungkook’s scowl deepen. 
“You’re more than that to me. You’ll always be.” His hand latches onto yours, and you pull yourself from him. 
“No Jungkook.. I’ve made up my mind. I really don’t think we could ever…” When your voice breaks and more tears accumulate in your waterline, Jungkook stops you, not wanting to cause you any more pain. 
“I got it, Y/N. But just know I’ll always be here… in any way you’ll take me.”
taglist: @babycandy111 @jk97bam @bellagrayson-wayne @honeeybunneey (can't be tagged), @talyaaas-blog , @jjeonjjk7 , @lovingkoalaface , @rvck0lover (can't be tagged), @kissyfacekoo , @dontcribuyabag (can't be tagged), @ash07128 , @cinnamonbambii , @jeon-ruby , @starlight-1010 , @hellbornsworld , @dodoneck, @papiibuprofen , @canyon-lwt , @appleh4ad , @screamertannie , @jeonjenny (can't be tagged), @ahgasegotarmy116 , @badaismygf (can't be tagged), @oopscoop , @gabsrecs , @hiii-priestess , @junniesoleilkth (can't be tagged) , @caro134340lina , @ellesalazar
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yoongiofmine · 6 months
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A Little Bit of Your Heart | YOONKOOK | Masterlist
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MAIN MASTERLIST
Pair: Yoongi  x f!reader ; Jungkook x f!reader
Summary: You had everything you could ever dream of; the career of your dreams as a music producer, the best friends you could ever wish for, and a exes-turned-friends-turned-fuck-buddies relationship with Min Yoongi. You knew you and Yoongi would never move past that and you were okay with it. Until a friend from your past comes back into your life, offering to give you everything you deserve, everything Yoongi couldn’t. Will Jungkook show you what you’ve been missing? Or will the new guy threaten Yoongi enough to do something about it? 
Genre and warnings: Series, fluff, angst, smut, non idol au, music producer au. Vmin side pairing. Roommate Namjoon, producer rap line, producer reader. Ginger Yoongi and Blueberry Koo. Namjoon and Jungkook are cousins in this, go with it. Ex-Yoongi. Childhood friend Jungkook. Mentions of Sope and Hoseok x reader.
Taglist: Open!
Updates every wednesday and friday.
[Membership]
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ONE
TWO
THREE
FOUR
FIVE
SIX
SEVEN
EIGHT
NINE
TEN
ELEVEN
TWELVE
THIRTEEN
FOURTEEN
FIFTEEN
SIXTEEN
SEVENTEEN
EIGHTEEN
NINETEEN
TWENTY
TWENTY ONE
TWENTY TWO - FINALE
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taegularities · 1 year
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candles & flames | jjk (m)
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chapter I:  water
Summary: He wasn’t supposed to be yours. His foolery wasn’t supposed to target you. This wasn’t supposed to happen.
➳ pairing: Jungkook x reader ➳ rating: 18+ ➳ genre: enemies to lovers, royal!au; angst, fluff, smut ➳ warnings: so! they’re both royalty/high in society (gd should’ve called this ‘royals’), fuckboy jk, banter, past side character death mentioned, hints of fake dating but not really, angst!, the ending.., douchebag jk at times, crying, guilt, jk is sus too, bits of jealousy, society sucks, explicit sexual content: carriage shenanigans, sexual tension, fingering, oral (m. & f. receiving), mouth fucking, spit stuff?, manhandling, spanking, dry humping, dirty talk, angry foreplay but things get softer, he comes in her mouth <3, they’re hiding during all that <3 ➳ wc: 24.6k 😐 ➳ a/n: sooo. i love e2l and regency aus, but i haven’t written much/any of those, so they’re not my strongest suit. but hopefully y’all will still enjoy reading it, bc i did enjoy writing it. it’s just the beginning hehe <3 this entirely new genre/trope took some brainpower lmao so i’d love if you dropped by and told me what you think !! 🤍 
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SERIES MASTERPOST | TAGLIST MASTERLIST | WIPs
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Jeon Jungkook’s sincerity doesn’t run as deep as his undeniable beauty.
His lopsided, rosy smile certainly has the unyielding power to deceive; but the confident walk and elegant bow are only convincing until he opens his mouth. You thought she knew — thought she’d be wiser than to fall for some deceitful doe eyes.
So your violent disappointment doesn’t come as a surprise when she strolls into your mansion tonight. An arm linked with his; her gentle hand remains on his light blue coat, and he looks as mannered as ever.
If you didn’t know about his nightly activities or what reputation he holds, you’d perhaps fall for the soft, treacly smile.
You stand on the second last step of your stairway, awaiting your sister’s arrival with the same old vexation you’ve felt since you met Jungkook for the first time. Years ago.
When he spots you, he sends a sly wink your way — he knows exactly what you harbour for him.
You respond with an unpleasant grimace, and he rolls his eyes with a scoff, bidding your sister goodbye for the night. She’s well mannered, too, or at least more than you.
Not that you walk the streets with a lifted dress and curses falling off your tongue. But she definitely hides her distaste for people better than you.
What surprises you, though… she’s not hiding anything with Jungkook. She genuinely respects him. Which you, personally, don’t quite understand.
When their farewells are over, she greets you with a nudge of your shoulder, and you follow her to her room with a deep sigh. You plump on her bed with worry carved between your eyebrows, watch her grant her scalp relief from the complicated hairdo.
“Tell me,” you start, meeting her eyes in her vanity mirror, “what do you like about him so much?”
You expect a grand confession of love; musings, poetry, a list of dozens of traits that won’t sound like him at all.
But the actual reaction you get back throws a thousand question marks into your brain.
“Nothing.”
You wait a moment. Perhaps she’ll elaborate, provide an explanation you can get behind.
When she doesn’t, you ask, “...What?”
“I mean. He’s kind, of course. He didn’t insult me or anything. In fact, he’s been nothing but a proper gentleman. But.” She lifts her shoulders in nonchalance and takes a deep breath. “I thought I needed to do this, because I was raised for this very moment all my life.”
You groan.
You’ve heard this speech before — and you still deeply disagree.
“Slowly dissolving in fencing and horse riding classes when I don’t even wish to get married,” she admits, and your eyes widen. “Or at least not to him. Just didn’t realise until now.”
“What do you mean?”
“It means that I’m not suitable for marriage yet. Honestly, you should be the one he courts.”
You let out a slightly shrill laugh, wondering if you misheard. But her insanity never knew any boundaries, so you shouldn’t be surprised that she uttered such a suggestion at all.
“You’re joking.”
“No!” she defends. “He suits you a lot better. Besides, I spoke to mother and father already and asked them to put Jeon’s hand in yours.”
Now that’s a piece of information that makes your heart race.
No way.
Just because one sister rejected, it doesn’t mean it’s the other’s turn. You live in a twisted world.
But you’re not playing her or anyone’s game, not today, not with that… man.
“Excuse me, what the hell did you say?” you snarl, leaving the bed in a hurry.
You step next to her, raging. Your heaving chest is bursting; even more so when she barely even flinches, unbothered and calm.
And then she dares to question, “What’s the problem?”
“The problem?!” you nearly yell back, nails digging into your palm hard enough to leave crescent scars. “I cannot stand this man. I— I heard from Aera just yesterday that she saw him leaving some tailor’s place. Buttons open.”
“What tailor?”
“The one near the theatre. He frequents that place sometimes.” You gesture around wildly, shaking your head like she’s lost her mind. Which you’re certain she has. “And her friends’. And that’s all that Aera sees, so God knows where else he puts his—”
“Does it matter?” Your sister turns in her seat, looking up to you with a sombre expression. “He’s a man, and he’ll get away with it. They do those things all the time. But… He’s still an important suitor and he’s not off the market. Heard he’s in search of someone.”
You fold your arms, tilting your head. “Off the market? Mother always says that about us as well. But we’re not objects to be sold.”
“It’s how the world views marriage, sweetheart. You should be happy our parents allow our suitors to court us.” You turn away, rubbing your eyes. It’s common these days, though. No need to deem yourself lucky just yet. “If we lived a few hundred years earlier or were raised by more authoritative parents, we would’ve been married with kids by the age of eighteen.”
“You’re genuinely insane,” is all you throw back.
But she doesn’t capitulate yet; instead, she clarifies, “You don’t need to meet him. But I just want to state that I won’t anymore, either.”
“And… you said just that to mother?”
“Of course,” she persists, running a fancy comb through her silky hair, “I’m her darling daughter, so she’ll do anything to see me happy.
You squint your eyes. “What did you say?”
“I said… that he and I aren’t compatible. That I do not want to spend my life with a man who doesn’t understand what I desire.”
You look at her in a faint mock, shifting your balance to one leg. A hand planted on your waist, you ask, “And you think I would be a better fit for him?”
“I mean, it’s a Lord, for God’s sake! Such royalty doesn’t approach us every day! And yes, I think you’re very different from me. And a lot like him,” she emphasises, once more.
“Whatever.”
Her eyes flash back to her mirror, cautious hands taking off the precious jewellery. For a moment, you don’t think much of the silence, but when you spare her another glance, she looks distracted.
An empty gaze and a frozen body; something that only ever occurs when she’s lost, deep in thought. Which means — something must be wrong.
You kneel next to her, placing a warm hand on her arm, and ask, “What is going on?”
“Nothing.”
“You’re lying,” you immediately snap back, “and you were never good at it anyway.”
She clicks her tongue, puffing out a breath. Leans forward and rubs her temples as she whines, “What do you want me to say? That I got to know his cousins while spending time with him? That I might or might not have fallen for one of them?”
You’re speechless. Baffled and unable to make sense of her babbling.
“But that I can’t possibly chase their gazes, because they’ll be gone in a month again?” she adds.
You have a slight hunch about what she might be suggesting. It’s not particularly difficult to figure out — not when you’re aware of Jeon Jungkook’s immediate relatives.
“Are you…” you whisper. “Are you talking about—”
“His name is Kim Seokjin,” she tells you, gulping hard, “and he has me wrapped around that pretty finger of his.”
“Does… does Jungkook know?”
“No, he doesn’t,” she explains; all of a sudden, she sounds exasperated, “but he knows something’s off. That’s why he’s not trying as hard anymore, though he genuinely seemed interested in me. That’s also why I needed you to take my place, because I do not want to hurt him.”
You let out a breathy chuckle, humming for a moment before you tell her, “I doubt you’re hurting him.”
She looks at you carefully; her fingers wander from her temples to her forehead. “Because of the things you’ve heard?”
“It just doesn’t sound like he cares a ton. And he has no manners,” you look away, hiding the transparent disgust in your countenance. “He’s frustrating and unpredictable, and his parents… caretakers had to save him several times.”
In a moment of despair, she grants you the tiniest of smiles; doesn’t notice your hesitation or the flaw in your sentence. Her eyes carry ache and hopelessness; you wish you could change reality in a way that suits her.
Gently, she assures, “Say whatever you will, sister. But upon meeting him… I don’t think you would still hold the same opinion about him.”
“...What?”
“He’s a gentleman when he wants something. And in the end, he won’t remember his weekend flings across town, but… the one he falls for. I’m just not suitable to be that woman.”
She’s lucky neither her nor Jungkook made a great deal out of their brief friendship, or the streets would already be talking about their falling out. As far as you recall, they never attended a ball together, or spent time anywhere but in one of his mansion’s private halls, sipping some beverages.
You knew it sounded boring.
But you didn’t think it’d be over within a week.
And you won’t question again when she, your mother, your father or anyone involved in this wicked case began picturing Jungkook and you as a duo. You’ve never expressed anything but utter disdain for him — so you’re bewildered.
Instead of clutching the indignation raging in your torso, you simply mumble, “Alright…”
She reminds you, “I’m not forcing you.” You grimace, and she responds with a weak smile, “I started this as a joke in fact, but now that I think about it… do consider it.”
And that’s it.
She stands from her chair, mindlessly braiding her hair; not quite ready for bed, but clearly in dire need to be left alone with her thoughts. Which you understand momentarily when she turns to you, softly stating, “I shall rest now.”
“Alright,” you repeat, arguments and confusion ebbing down.
And eventually, you stroll to your room to battle your very own muddled up thoughts.
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The night stretches endlessly, and the morning is quiet.
Your father withdrew to his room possibly before your eyes slipped open, and your mother is, if you were to believe your sister, already promenading with some of her friends. Titles are scattered across the peerage, so you guess it’s more of a circle to exchange rumours than anything.
Your morning remains uneventful until noon breaks in; you soon wish you could continue wallowing in boredom when you fly down the stairs, opening the door where the three loud knocks came from.
Half expecting your tailor to bring new gifts for an upcoming ball, your smile soon drops when you see who’s actually ogling at you.
Eyes flit from the ground to yours. He puts on a sweet smile, taking off his gloves. He’s wearing a long dark coat with a red waistcoat underneath, matching the colour of the obligatory hat that you’re sure he didn’t wear.
His hair is too flawless, not a strand out of place, parted on the side.
You might never be able to understand his lifestyle or his will to roam around the town so recklessly, but you’ll never deny how unnaturally handsome Jeon Jungkook is.
Might be the slightly tilted smile, the big, jet black eyes. Or the golden skin, the button nose. Constantly pouty lips, deep dimples that he doesn’t need to smile for.
If he wasn’t as imprudent as his reputation suggests, you’d probably be one of the many women sighing and dreaming in his presence.
But alas.
“Good morning,” he says, his voice as mellow as his simple nod dashing, “is your sister present, perhaps?”
He sounds amiable, attempting his best to not vex you more than he already does. You want to respond in similar kind, but you can’t quite blandish the truth when you tell him, “She doesn’t want to see you anymore.”
His eyes widen, but blink just as fast. The initial shock ebbs down as soon as it came — as though he expected it, but hoped for a different outcome.
Jungkook sighs, quietly complaining, “Figured that… but she could’ve told me.”
“She… she said you knew.”
“I suppose I did,” he says, clicking his tongue. He tilts his head for a moment, his pupils shaking in distress like his soul is falling apart. Then, he averts your gaze to stare at the outer wall of your house. Pausing, uncertain what to say before he finally asks, “Did she tell you why?”
But you won’t break this easily. Not due to the honey sweet tone in his voice. “She’s my sister. I can’t spill secrets to a stranger.”
Jungkook and you neither meet nor speak too often. But whenever he crosses your path, no matter how often you try to dodge his looming presence, there’s familiarity in his words.
Like now.
“Are we really strangers?”
You suppose you’re not.
And the truth is, if Jungkook wasn’t out to clash with you every chance he gets, you might be able to forgive what happened so many years ago.
Perhaps you’ve forgiven already — perhaps there’s even a shred of empathy left in you that feels guilty for disliking him as you do.
If he was nicer to you. If he didn’t mess with your kindness so much.
“I can’t. And I won’t say anything,” you answer eventually, straightening your back.
“Very well. I guess I’ll figure it out myself.”
“I guess you will.”
Annoyed, he half turns around, giving up with a shaking head before he halts. He hesitates, delaying whatever he still needs from you. You await his unspoken question patiently.
And then he finally looks at you, only moving his head, still in flight position, “Is she okay?”
The few times you granted him a look at balls or gatherings, his smirk was mischievous. Passing by you, the gazes he threw were sly and arrogant.
But right now, you see none of it. He looks genuinely worried; somewhat apologetic. So you nod, and tell him, “She is. We’ll be going on a walk today.”
Jungkook has never quite been as kind to you as today. But once you reassure him that the gap between him and your sister won’t linger, he hums. Sighs. The gentle armour falls off his face, and his usual cocky demeanour returns.
But you won’t let him emotionally damage you today. Instead, you ask first, “What about you, prince? Another appointment somewhere?”
You know he’s not quite a prince. He’s the Duke’s son — but maybe you’re purposely trying to be rude.
And it truly is demeaning to switch the title. It’s most likely redundant, too.
But you can’t bear his words anymore. Hurt accompanied his presence one too many times in the past, and you can’t hear any of it anymore.
He looks confused, eyebrows shifting closer, and asks, “Appointment?”
“I just… I figured you have plenty of other rendezvous you can attend. That you’ll get over my sister quickly.”
Jungkook cocks an eyebrow in irritation, fingers fiddling with his gloves, “Hold on. Did I do something to you?”
What?
He must be mocking you.
“You don’t kno––” you begin, only to be cut off.
“I know we snapped at each other at parties, but… you can’t hate me this much.”
Funny. Because you know he hates you just as much.
“Jeon Jungkook,” you emphasise, stepping closer to the threshold, “if you truly don’t remember, then it’s not worth mentioning.”
“Wait, I— I honestly just—”
“Go take a walk. Maybe you will know then.”
You shut the door without granting him a chance to justify himself and press your back against the cold wall. Your chest rises and falls once, heavily and deeply, and you shut your eyes.
You despise confrontation more than him. To him, you might seem like a shameless, wilding brat, but you’ve never been this defensive with anyone before.
Reputable kindness, endless grace, yet a respectable feisty nature let you shine in people’s eyes. 
Not in his. And that’s alright.
When your eyes crack open again, your mother’s stepping down to you, a soft smile playing around her lips. You raise your eyebrows, confused as you ask, “I thought you were out with your girlfriends.”
“I was… an hour ago.”
She must have come back when you were scouring the library. You didn’t hear.
“What happened there?” she wonders, pointing a finger to the door.
You push yourself off the wall, flattening your dress. “That was nothing.”
Your mother silences. Looks at you knowingly; then spits the topic you dreaded, “Your sister has broken her affiliation with him.”
“Affiliation? Maybe that’s why.”
“What about you?”
“...What about me?”
She’s careful when it’s about Jungkook. You’ve always reacted to him like this — even when the trio announced him as your sister’s potential future husband for the first time.
So she waits for your expressions to relax, folding her hands, slowly blinking, before she reminds you, “There was a time, long before he courted your sister, when he was almost your suitor.”
No.
You stuffed this very memory in the back of your mind, and you won’t let her tug it to the front. You won’t even tell her what occurred back then; why you wrote him off, all the things he said.
You used to taint him in others’ eyes; but you’re tired now. The negativity may as well stay within you.
“So?” you finally murmur.
“You could meet him. You should.”
“Why? Why does everybody say that? Or… or expect that from me?”
“It’s not about expecting anything from you,” your mother argues, “and in the end, it is up to you what you decide. But your sister has rambled on and on, multiple times, how he reminds her of you, how you’d be perfect if you gave each other a cha—”
“That sounds surreal, mother.”
“If there is any chance for you to be happy, to be something your sister can’t be yet… why not try?” She’s persistent, you must admit. You do wish she put her energy into something else, though. “But. I understand. If he was to ask, you would undoubtedly say no… right?”
“Precisely.”
She smiles at you, briefly closing her eyes. Then, she turns on her heel, lifting her shoulders just a little as if to mock you, and breathes, “Very well.”
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In a way, you often wonder whether mothers possess the gift of sight.
One time, she foreshadowed rain on a seething, sunny day, claiming that her headache only occurred when weather conditions changed drastically.
Another day, when you were around twenty years old, she’d warned you to be careful when boating with your friends that day. You remained home, heeding her message, only to find out not long after that there had been a dangerous fight amongst gangsters just where you would’ve rented a boat.
It seems that even today, her mocking sarcasm and cunning smile didn’t disappoint.
Or, perhaps they did.
Because in the best case scenario, she would’ve walked away and finished the topic nonchalantly — that she didn’t, manifested the second knock on your door today, close to your bedtime while everyone else is already asleep.
Not you.
The late night snack happens too often these days, your hidden guilty pleasure. Not rarely does your tailor wonder why your corset needs new stitching each time, but you can’t bother less about this age’s beauty standards and starvation techniques for women.
Dropping the biscuit, you rub your hands clean off the crumbs, rushing to the door without expecting anyone tonight. 
The first thought that flashes through your mind is that it might be someone your father awaited. Last week alone, he had two visitors at this time, discussing some more finances, some more business.
But not today.
Instead, the same familiar face greets you that you sent away this noon.
“You’re… here again,” you say, but Jungkook’s expressions don’t budge a bit.
He looks nervous, somewhat lost. As though he spent his hours adrift on lonely streets, unsure what road leads home.
What he says surprises you.
“Could we go on a walk?”
“On a walk?”
“I need to speak to you.”
The atmosphere and mood differ vastly from when he appeared on your doorstep before. He’s looking at you directly this time, not quite averting your gaze as he did last time. At noon, he sought out someone else, finding you.
And now that he’s face to face with the exact person he needs, his eyes are more piercing, more focused.
Rejection lies casually on your tongue. It’s an easy word for you when it comes to him; and you know exactly how effortless it would be if you sent him home now as well.
But then, you remember what your mother said — wonder whether she delivered a secret letter to him, urging him to come back. Or perhaps, she once again foresaw the future and gave you the faintest signal to do the opposite of what you’d usually do.
Maybe.
So you take a deep breath, glancing behind you, hesitating for a moment as you ask, “You shouldn’t be asking a lady to accompany you on a walk, not at this hour.”
“I’m not trying to abduct you. I just need to talk a little, and I will send you back home safely.”
You can’t tell him that your mother would jump at the opportunity to bring you closer to him — perhaps not so late, and perhaps not alone. But she’s not the one whose permission you need.
But your own.
“What if someone sees us?” you try again.
“They won’t. All you have is a garden nearby, and the worst beast we might encounter is the sin… lust.”
You grimace in disgust, ready to step back before he starts chuckling and clarifies, “Not with me. But. I am saying that those who still roam the streets will be more terrified of tainting their own reputation than yours.”
You’re out of options and excuses.
Licking your lip, you spare another glance to the hall behind you. Nothing, no one.
And eventually, you let the shawl you dropped on your shoulders an hour ago fall, wrapping it around your arms and chest as you step out into the night.
The garden, as Jungkook deduced, lies few minutes from your house. It’s a pleasant night to spend time outside, and if you weren’t a homebody during the weekend, you might have taken a stroll tonight anyway.
Your area is safe; your mother still doesn’t enjoy your lone escapades.
Once you’ve reached the garden, you let out a relieved sigh. In truth, you can barely see the colours of the flowers around you, but you do register the fragrance that the summer breeze wafts towards you.
You like the scent; bask in it. It feels as though it’s repairing broken fragments of you that you didn’t know existed in the first place.
As you take a seat on the low, cold stone wall, you break the silence of the last minutes, and ask, “Why did you seek me out anew tonight?”
Jungkook snickers for a bare moment, leaning forwards and spreading his legs, folding his hands between them. He looks up to your puzzled expression, and states, “You don’t need to speak so formally to me. We’re not at the Queen’s castle.”
You exhale, letting your shoulders drop a little, and repeat, “Why are you here, Jungkook?”
His laughter continues faintly before it dies, but in the faint light of the moon, you still see the remnants of his smile. Ingenuine, keeping it to hold onto optimism.
He admits, “I didn’t know what else to do.”
You don’t have the faintest clue what that might mean. But you try, “You didn’t have anywhere else to be?”
“Maybe I did. But it’s gotten boring. Trivial.”
You roll your eyes. If you meant resting in his room, then Jungkook means rolling around on someone’s sheets.
If you’re the calmness of water, then he’s the danger of fire.
You tease, “Poor you. Desired by everyone.”
“Not everyone, right?” You see him winking and shake your head in disbelief. Look away and directly into the direction from where the night wind blows. Shiver. “Are you cold? We can go back—”
Something in your mind finally breaks, and you interject, causing him to shrink, “Let it out. Honestly. Why are you being so nice to me?”
He looks baffled, pouting, eyes wider than usually. He plays the act of the innocent lamb perfectly, but you’re not stupid. Not even when he asks, “Am I not allowed to?”
“Sure,” you shrug your shoulders, rubbing your knees, “but it doesn’t suit you.”
“I’ll have you know,” he begins. He leans closer than you’d like him to. “That I’m constantly very kind to women.”
You huff. “So you don’t usually regard me as a woman.”
“I mean. Now I do.”
God.
Insufferable.
You tongue the inside of your cheek, observing his provoking grin for a moment longer until you spit, “Whatever.”
Wiping the non-existent dust off your gown, you stand, wondering why you agreed in the first place, and mumble, “This is an absolute waste of my time. I could be sleeping.”
Perhaps it’s the intensely piqued glare you throw at him; or perhaps, it’s the fact that he came all the way here, to converse with you and have you walk away.
But Jungkook’s strings break, and he rubs his face violently, grabbing your wrist before you can walk away. He tugs at your arm and pulls your body back, eliciting a gasp out of you as he realises what he did.
“What in the worl—” you exclaim, possibly loud enough for the neighbourhood to hear.
But he lets you go immediately, shushing you with a finger on his plush lips before he whisper-yells, “What the hell is your problem?!”
You fold your arms, furrowing your eyebrows. “Ah, yeah. Here he is, the man I know.”
“No, seriously,” he challenges, taking a stand in front of you. “This condescending attitude is just what made me treat you the way I did.”
You let a breathy laugh fall, mustering all the mockery in your voice as you say, “You can’t excuse anything you’ve ever said with this.”
“Why can I not? Were you not going around town, spreading absolute bull about me?”
You remember. You did. But that’s because Jungkook began; knew how to humiliate you, knew how to nearly destroy your persona to the entire peerage.
Seems that he carried this with him just as much as you did. Only, you never feigned kindness; never forced yourself to amity to the point of implosion.
And Jungkook… Jungkook is imploding.
Annoyed and harsh, you inquire, “Have you ever wondered why?”
“I knew why. But you started the hostility.”
“I did not,” you defend, “You just don’t seem to recall everything.”
Pause.
Unsteady breathing, clenched fists.
His expression is changing, and his body is backtracking. Suddenly, his eyes look crestfallen, not as filled with fury anymore.
And you know why.
“I remember,” he admits, “But I… I’d rather pretend I don’t.”
Again… you know why.
“I understand,” you tell him, just a portion calmer. “It still didn’t feel good.”
You think you see the same fragments of guilt that are cutting your heart. Because when you think back to what he’s pretending to forget, you still can’t hate the boy for what he did.
Only for the things he kept doing.
“I needed to speak to you, but… I never wanted to bring up all the moments I hurt you,” he mutters.
You bite your lower lip, shaking your head. And then, you tell him, “You didn’t just hurt me. You humiliated me.”
“I—”
“You say you remember. But what about all the details, all the tiny moments? The exact things you said.”
He shakes his head, urging you to stop.
Yet, you say, still calmly, “Let me help you remember it all.”
His mouth opens to speak, but you’re already a step ahead.
“Apart from that very first night when we were children, Jungkook,” you begin, closing the distance by a bit, “you would always tell your cousins how stuck up I looked standing aside at any gathering.”
“I—”
“That I was an outcast. You would compare my dresses to fruits, laugh at them, or point out a minor flaw about me, or make fun of how I never smiled because of how tight my corset sat.”
The words spilling out of you were long overdue.
In truth, you’ve never been alone with him. You could never lash out at him at balls without him embarrassing you back a thousandfold.
And right now, your chest is burning, sadness in your eyes as you narrate further, “And I loved those dresses. The young and naive me would… prepare them days before and jump in joy. Just to hide in the back once she saw you.”
Remorse overtakes his features. You’ve never witnessed such a thing before — and despite the gratification coursing through you, you can’t help but feel bad, too.
“I didn’t know,” he murmurs, “I was… reacting. I was furious, because I know what you told people about me. I was never interested in becoming the honourable Lord everyone wants me to be, but I still despised the judgemental side-eyes.”
“I did it, because I remembered how you’ve always treated me. Besides, I never ruined your reputation, because you did it very well for yourself!”
Shit.
You regret it once you’ve said it.
He winces, and you step back again, clearing your throat. You shut your eyes, and open them again, talking on when he doesn’t respond, “And you know what else? Do you know what the worst thing you did and my biggest mistake was?”
He knows. He must.
Because the time you’re referencing, on that very gathering, your eyes met just briefly. And he could see the damp dejection on your waterline.
“Listen…” he tries, but you inhale, loudly and deeply.
“When I was being paraded by boys, I still thought it a good idea to accept you as a suitor, because my mother convinced me to. I thought… Odd! I’m just a Viscount’s daughter. The Duchess’ son might court me? An honour.”
Your voice is trembling; less because of the tears that hold back, but more because of the anxiety that confrontation brings. No matter the damage caused, you feel bad.
But you can’t stop the flood of thoughts.
“We were adults then, and I was ready to forgive you,” you tell him, gulping, “until you told a handful of men who liked me, that I’m the most untrustworthy snake in town. And how my sister,” you laugh; your gaze shifts to the ground, “is much more beautiful and actually worth the trouble.”
The waterfall of your words comes to an end abruptly.
Silence falls between you, and so does Jungkook’s head.
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“You never even apologised,” you tell him.
Jungkook’s thoughts whirl around their own axis.
Life threw hurdles at him, and soon made him someone he’d never aspired to be. Half of the things you listed have long escaped his memory — what remains is how empty he felt each night before he fell asleep.
How bitter and cold he’d become after one too many strokes of fate. 
Were you the only person he hurt as he did?
Probably not. Though you were possibly his easiest target; good to blow out steam on when you tossed the opportunity to hate you to his feet.
And what’s left to say now?
“I am sorry,” he mumbles.
But you don’t look convinced. Your eyes are misty, your demeanour despondent. You don’t respond.
The reason he knocked on your door tonight emerged due to entirely different reasons. The spat you both just engaged in wasn’t part of the plan.
Yet, somehow, you’ve still arrived at just the right point.
Where Jungkook’s suggestion might make sense to you, only maybe, considering that he has barely grasped his own ideas and thoughts.
Aware how ridiculous it might come out, Jungkook treads carefully, almost back pedalling before he chooses to let out, “Let me court you.”
And the world suddenly stands still.
For him.
For you.
Words echo. Court… you?
You’re confused; your rage is dying. The muscles of your face relax, and you part your lips, probably deeming his proposition a joke before you ask, “What?”
“I know you can’t stand me. And… I think you know you’re not my first choice either, but. My mother wants me to approach you.”
Your eyes widen, as if he’s said something you resonate with. As if you’ve landed in the most absurd coincidence.
“Your… your mother?” you stutter.
Jungkook nods. “She’s acquainted with your sister. And with you as well. She claims that if your sister can’t spend her life with me, I should take a step towards you.”
And when you speak, Jungkook understands your prior expression, because you silently confess to float in the same boat, “Did you talk this out with my mother? Is she involved?”
“No… what?”
“Nothing. What you’re suggesting is insane.”
Jungkook draws a breath; fingers lift to rub his aching eyelids, “I know. As I said… I don’t think we fit together as well as my mother might think, but… you enjoy a great reputation. She thinks I should try it with people like you before throwing my life away.”
By now, you’re finding it ridiculous, because you laugh, discouraging Jungkook further. “Try what? I am not a toy to prepare you for something better. I won’t be your saviour, and I don’t want to be.”
“You wouldn’t be. But, despite the hate we carry for each other, I think that you and I would understand each other.”
“Understand… how?”
You’re not buying it. He can see it.
He knew his idea would land on empty ears — it sounds too stupid, too sudden.
But he still attempts, “Aren’t you and I both… acting like we’re in the middle but never quite there?”
“...How?”
“I walk around town. You have dozens of friends. But when it comes to life or meaningful thinking… how often do you find yourself trusting someone?”
The breeze cools a little more, playing around your locks, dishevelling his hair. For a moment, you look to his feet, and then you whisper through the susurrating wind, “How would you know?”
Easy answer.
“Because I saw you at balls. You would converse and dance with the guests, but once you’d satisfied their needs to gain the attention of the beautiful honourable sisters… you retracted. As though you’d finished a task. They were happy, and you were happy to observe.”
You hesitate.
And then say, “You were, too, weren’t you? If you didn’t observe, you wouldn’t know all that.”
“Maybe. They say keep your friends close, but your enemies…”
“You dislike me, but still want to court me?”
“I… I want to try. I don’t want to regret not trying. And I am sick of sleeping around town,” he confesses. It’s something you didn’t expect, he thinks. Because you tilt your head in question.
He assumes you don’t hear it when he adds in a quiet whisper, “That brute in our mansion is right about one thing… I’m not good for much.”
Jungkook can’t decipher whether you heard it and are ignoring it or whether you didn’t hear and are still ignoring it. Because you state, “I don’t want you to be my friend just to find out who you are.”
And again, he defends, “That’s not what it is. I know who I am. I just need someone to talk about it who will be neutral. If we still hate each other later, I won’t ask anything more of you.”
That’s it. Nothing more… seemingly.
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Your thoughts are all over the place.
He says one thing, and then another. You interpret it one way, and then another.
Your head needs rest.
“Do you realise that you barely make any sense?” you shoot, impatient and tired.
“Do you realise that most of our feuds are in the past?” he counters, his voice louder now. “If we hadn’t wounded each other so much at such a young age… I wonder if we could’ve been friends. I just. I don’t wish to foster bitter relationships anymore.”
You remain quiet. So he’s saying… he wants to get closer to you, because he assumes you match his mindset? Similar to your mother, to his mother?
He wants to build a relationship with someone honest, who won’t gloss over the truth.
And.
He wants to eliminate the hatred in his life. Wants to renew his opinion about people. Thinks that with proper peace, you could be friends, if not more.
Is that the summary of his suggestion? Does it make sense? You don’t know.
“I need to redeem myself,” he then tells you, “I know I wasn’t the best person, but I want to be better.”
“All of a sudden?”
“Perhaps. Or maybe not. Maybe your sister brought me closer to a memory with you. And the memory led to what my father wanted. And… that led to me realising… that I’ve become the person he didn’t want me to be.”
Maybe that’s valid reasoning. But you’re sceptical. And if you were to give him a chance, you’d still proceed cautiously.
“Which means…” you start.
“That I shouldn’t have done all that to you that night. I don’t think it’s easy for either of us to find liking each other, because too much happened, but… I want to try.”
Final statement.
He wants to try. Even adds one single, “Please.”
And you’re conflicted. It’s a risk, isn’t it? A risk to get hurt, or to be disappointed, to fall back into old habits without any progress.
But.
Maybe you should try the way he is.
Your, as well as his, mother vowed that you are identical in personality. Your sister did, too.
To you, you’re water, and he’s fire — but perhaps there’s a grey area where you meet. Where you collide and become steam, evaporating, hot yet calm.
So you finally say, “One chance. And that's all you get.”
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You remember being eleven at most.
You remember navigating through the darkness, at a time that your parents were long awaiting you at home. You had just stepped out of your friend’s place a few minutes ago; in hindsight, you should’ve never gone to someone whose parents allowed such a thing and never bothered to bring you home.
Even though you didn’t live too far away, the journey home, wading through the rain, felt endless.
Oh, and there’s that, too.
You remember pouring rain.
And spotting the Duke’s son when you least expected it.
Back then, you wouldn’t see him in town too often. In truth, he and his brother spent most of their time studying in a much livelier city, learning manners, acquiring skills.
They’d come home for the weekend, and even then, they wouldn’t leave their mansion and their parents’ side much.
But when the beloved Duke died, leaving your town gasping and in quiet anguish, you saw Jungkook from this close for the very first time.
It was spring, you believe. Warm enough to enjoy lunch near the lake, to exchange conversations and jokes. But the nightly fog and rain were still freezing, yet half as bad with the umbrella over your head.
He was weeping, alone on some run-down bench; legs crossed, barely noticing you when you drew closer.
“Excuse me?” your tiny voice asked; you recall squinting your eyes. “Don’t you need to be home?” He didn’t answer. Didn’t even look at you. “Does someone know where you are?”
Your house was a few streets away, but walking to the mansion took a fair amount of time. You wondered whether he’d run all the way down here; with a childish mind, you also wondered what it felt like running from home.
Arguments are a common human trait, especially as a child grows up. Back then, you didn’t know, and despite your obedience in your house, you wondered if you had the guts to leave, should your parents give you hell today.
Jungkook’s affliction, you understood. You figured why he was here at all, lonesome and lost, unable to take the gut-wrenching cries that probably roamed their castle.
You reached out to touch his shoulder, and leaned in to lift the umbrella over both your heads. It was the first time he met your eyes — the white of them was red, tears on his cheek merging with the rain.
The sheer amount of pain overwhelmed your fragile heart. You were just a child, watching someone shatter and break in front of you. He had big eyes back then, too, the same pouty lips, and his crying fractured something deep inside you.
You’d claim that you’d always been an empathic child — and you’d claim that Jungkook, once upon a time, used to be similar.
But not anymore.
That night changed him. Or at least, you think it was one of the reasons that altered his personality.
Because from afar, he appeared sweet, friendly, and mannered. But you didn’t expect his fiery reaction when you said, “You can come home with me.”
It was a simple suggestion. A sign of a stranger’s sympathy.
But Jungkook either didn’t catch your amenity or didn’t know how to give it back properly.
So he didn’t at all.
When he spoke, he sounded scared. Even in his fear, though, he wasn’t gentle with you.
Today, you can only remember every word when you think about it hard. When you don’t, fragments of sentences flash through your mind, something with home and dead and cosy fantasy world.
You’ve long pushed it out of your head; you wonder how much he remembers.
But you still know that he left you speechless and confused. You were hurt, as much as a child can be hurt from another stranger child; but even then, you knew where his temper was coming from.
You silenced.
You stood in front of him in the cold shower. Water collected in your shoes, goosebumps on your skin, but you weren’t shivering anymore.
His breath fell heavily, and his gaze fixated somewhere near your knees. And despite the things he’d said, you touched his shoulders again, telling him, “Go home.”
To which he replied, “I don’t have to.”
“But you will get sick.”
“Who cares?”
It was tough to come up with something he’d want to hear — and when you lost the courage bit by bit, close to leaving him and walking away, you heard a carriage approach.
The next bits have always been chipped particles of your memory.
How someone stepped out of the carriage, thoroughly irked, calling his name and scolding the life out of him. The man was tall and well-built, handsome to a pleasant degree, but the monstrous anger in his face left an upsetting impression on you.
And Jungkook — he just listened. That is, until he finally conjured up an excuse; you still haven’t figured out what strange reason urged him to come up with, “I apologise. The girl led me to these alleys, and I couldn’t find my way back.”
Of all the things he could’ve said.
You still don’t know.
Lying isn’t the worst sin of them all; but sometimes, it does wound an eleven year old more than it should.
Because he said it quietly and calmly, differently from how he’d spoken to you.
You were too young. You didn’t understand how to effectively defend yourself.
So you panicked when the man you didn’t know — Jungkook’s uncle, his dowager mother’s cousin who later married her and became the Duke himself, as you’d find out — came closer, peppering you with a dozen questions.
He asked what you’d intended to do, or why you’d get in his way on such a day, and did you not know who that boy was? What had happened today? What you were getting yourself into?
That everyone was worried sick and your search for a playmate set the entire mansion ablaze?
You claimed that nothing happened, and that you’d just found him. That you wanted to help, that you would’ve told Jungkook’s family if there was any way to do so.
You were clutching the umbrella tight between your little fingers; and the hold didn’t lose until his eyebrows relaxed. Because in hindsight, you were lucky that he didn’t say anything worse, that he didn’t notify your parents or demanded anything for the damage.
The Jeons were grieving too much; they couldn’t be bothered with some girl.
So they both left.
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You snap out of your trance, inches from Jungkook’s shoulder.
It’s bizarre to see him smiling at you now, an utter contrast to your first meeting. In truth, the entire world has changed.
You used to witness it from an innocent point of view; you’d hold onto your mother’s hand, and play with other girls until you started understanding the concept of such balls and soirees.
People are all looking at you, whispering to each other, gathering rumours and information to expand on later. Their eyes are wide when they see the two of you, lips parted.
Not too far from you, your mother and sister are nodding encouragingly, fitting into the atmosphere so much better tonight than you.
Of course they were delighted to hear the news.
Your father escaped to the garden, drinking with people he knows, talking about God knows what.
And here you are, next to the man that voiced the most unbelievable proposition you’ve ever heard.
The truth is.
You think you’ve long forgiven him for that night. The harsh words thrown at you, the lie he crafted, the anger his uncle unleashed on you.
You’ve forgiven him, because you can’t imagine the pain of losing someone so dear. His own father. Reigning during the day, gone that very night.
There’s not much one can hold against a child.
But what you hate is how much that night started. How it rolled out the rivalry without any valid reason.
How you grew to view him from your most bitter side, remembering the fear he put you through despite his own pain. How the gazes you gave him carried a sour taste, and how he consequently turned bitter, too.
He probably wasn’t always like that — but the years that followed made your life hell. The boy you heard of from other people, the reputation he held… gone one day.
As he grew up, he frequented various women’s places, a new one every other month, and they all would never stop swooning over him. He liked that.
Didn’t care about tarnishing his image — perhaps he thought it was his brother who’d reign one day anyway.
And somehow, he respected you the least. All the accusations you threw at him just two days ago, standing in the dark garden, you still take each of them to heart.
At some point you came up with the theory that he connects the memory of that night, his father’s death, too much with you. That this is why he’s always hated you, just because he could.
And you’re sure that this very theory of you is correct, because you don’t know many other of his victims.
But deep-rooted ache of the past or not.
Sometimes, a behaviour can’t be excused.
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You look back and forth again.
Up to the chandelier dangling from the ceiling, to the orchestra chiming its music through the hall. Everything is bright and white, giggles drowning in the music, dancing couples ecstatic.
The hall is divided into obvious sections: courting men who impress gorgeous girls. Mothers fanning air into their faces and watching. The host nowhere to be seen and the scent of finger food filling the room.
If it wasn’t for the others’ occasional, judgemental glances, you might even find some liking in the aesthetics.
Jungkook insisted on making this the first opportunity to carry out his plan. Not that you weren’t coming to this fete anyway — you were anticipating this dress for days.
Your apparent suitor kept stopping every now and then throughout the night — or at least since you arrived forty minutes ago. He conversed with whoever approached him, and you realised that he knows far more people than you ever could.
Which shouldn’t come as a surprise, considering his status.
But it’s funny to you — how they’re smiling at him, speaking to him for their own advantage. Because you know for a fact that those are the same people who’d fire double as many malicious rumours about him back at you when you badmouthed him in the past.
They’re different from the men in Jungkook’s life. Because when his cousins trudge along, greeting him gently, their eyes land on you for just a moment; then back on Jungkook.
Kim Taehyung says, “Now that’s an unusual pairing if I’ve ever seen one.”
“Get used to it,” Jungkook counters.
Your head turns fast, and you regard him with a puzzled look.
What? Is he pretending? Get used to what?
You thought you were just trying this thing out.
“What happened to all those evil adjectives?” Taehyung prods, drawing close; Jungkook pushes him away lightly.
You gather that Kim Seokjin must be the mature one out of those two, because he boxes Taehyung in his sides, eliciting a deep groan. He looks at you so softly that you feel immediate sympathy with him.
Even though he might be one of the people who nodded along when Jungkook insulted you behind your back.
“I mean, we’re trying to get used to each other, too,” Jungkook clarifies.
You exhale in relief. Well, that certainly makes more sense.
“What for?” Taehyung asks.
“You don’t need to know everything. Or anything at all.”
“Alright,” Taehyung whines, full lips sulking as he steps away, “not like you tell me much anyway.”
Seokjin gives you one last, apologetic grin, walking away with his brother as though he’s babysitting him. You follow his movements, only smiling once you realise where he’s come to a stand.
You think he’s spotted your sister. And you keep watching as he moves to her slowly; watch as her gaze falls to the ground, eyelashes shyly brushing her cheeks.
He lifts a hand, and by the looks of it, you guess she has accepted his proposal to dance, too.
For a moment, you feel serene. Blend out the noise and brightness around you.
But as your smile widens and your heart soars, Jungkook calls your name as though it’s a melody.
Your focus breaks when your eyes fall on his, your joy replaced by confusion as he clears his throat and offers you a hand. His spontaneity must be a constant character trait of his, because up until now, you couldn’t predict a single word, a single motion of his.
“Would the lady like to dance?” he asks, an arm behind his back, just as high society’s rules claim.
You roll your eyes — he’s truly putting every bit of effort into this affair, isn’t he?
But you’re a lady indeed, and none to decline a gentleman’s kind offer. Not publicly, at least.
You plant a palm in his, and he leads you among the couples swaying away, lost in each other. Some conversing, some not. You throw your locks out of your face, drawing a long breath when his hand lifts to the small of your back.
It’s a soft touch, yet so unfamiliar. Strange. You’re not certain what to make of it.
You conjure a distraction from the questions in your mind, cocking an eyebrow as you state, “They seem to have quite an opinion about me.”
Jungkook’s pupils briefly move to where you assume his cousins must be standing, though you can see at least one of them dancing not far from you. Basking in more amusement than you ever might with the very man staring at you.
Jungkook kisses his teeth; then sighs for a moment. Eventually, he declares, “It’s not their opinion. They don’t care.”
“So you do?”
“I wish I didn’t.”
You scoff. “And I wish I could take this in a good way.”
Imitating your sneaking irritation, he puffs out a breath, guiding you slowly. His feet lead you in gracious motions; and you must admit that despite the insolence that he never fails to rile you up with… your hand fits into his perfectly.
If it wasn’t for his nearly constantly demeaning expression, you could perhaps forget that he despises you.
And you him.
“You didn’t want to dance with me, did you?” you spit.
His eyebrows relax, his lips parting; his silence grants you utter satisfaction. You wonder which justification has materialised in his mind this time.
He doesn’t bark back anymore, instead claiming, “It’s not that I didn’t want to.”
“But,” you argue, “you’re obviously doing things right now, because you’re forcing yourself to all of it.”
Jungkook remains stubborn, opposing immediately, “No. Not at all. I’m enjoying the night.”
“You’re barely looking at me.”
“I didn’t know you’d want that.”
Fair.
You did conclude right from the beginning that this idea would end in a blind alley. But the thought of wasting your time still feels intolerable to you.
“Perhaps you’re right,” you tell him, “wouldn’t know what to say to you anyway.”
He grimaces, and his mood changes; a one-eighty turn from vexed to teasing like it’s nothing. “That’s not so kind,” he quips, “I honestly thought we were trying something here.”
“You were. Jungkook, you suggested all of this.”
Jaw hard, he looks away for a moment before he admits, “It’s not easy. All of this… the execution might be flawed, but I know no other way to hate you less.”
You don’t take his words to heart this time; in fact, you agree. Whispering, “I know.”
In a room filled with laughter, your bicker feels inappropriate. With the mood down and the atmosphere tense, neither of you will win tonight.
And you understand that he thinks the same, because in the next moment, he inhales and asks, “What did you do today?”
You pause. Blink. Sigh, and then hum.
Tell him, “I woke up. I read some of my book. Then I went for a walk, spontaneously crossed paths with a friend.” You think again, smacking your lips. “Got ready for tonight, and now I am here. Very unexpectedly dancing with Jeon Jungkook.”
Another sneering laugh falls out of him, and he nods, clarifying, “It’s not unexpected, is it? You knew we were coming here.”
You shrug your shoulders, unable to argue, and ask back, “What did you do today?”
“I was… hmm. I needed to attend something important with my brother,” he parts from you, turning you around your axis, “thoughts of what you might be wearing tonight.” His body leaves yours once more before his hands pull you back in. “Tried on some clothes, drank some whiskey to prepare for tonight. And now we’re here.”
Your insides burn.
The fire that spreads is ambiguous — you can’t quite say if you love or hate it.
But there is no time to dwell on it, no chance to ask about it; so you choose to ignore his comment about your dress, not least of all because you can barely imagine he means it in a pleasing way.
You ask, “You attend important businesses, too?”
He chuckles, eyebrows drawing close. “Did you think I merely go around town all day and watch the clouds float by?”
“I thought you’re stuck all the time.”
“Stuck?”
“In… someone.”
Another set of eyes rolling. God, you must be irritating him — almost as though he’s swallowing his own medicine, right?
The music just won’t end. You’ve been turning in circles for ages; your breath is turning stagnant by the minute. And this darn conversation knows no end, either.
“You really think highly of me. Very pleasant to know,” Jungkook says, his expression neutral.
Unresponsive, you only shake your head, looking through the sea of guests.
The rest of the couples surely look happier than the two of you by miles. Their enthusiasm dejects you a little; you wonder how high the chances are that his plan will succeed if you keep looking at each other like that.
But… you guess he keeps trying.
Like, when he says, “I meant to tell you that… you look gorgeous tonight.”
If anything between you came out of the blue, then this must be the most unforeseen surprise.
Your eyebrows shoot up, and you lean back, voicing a single, “Oh?”
You’re not able to add to it when you switch sides, grasping his other hand. And then, your bodies separate, apart from the hand you’re holding, stretching your fingers to the man next to you; adhering to the choreography.
His fingertips touch yours just briefly, and a fleeting moment later, you’re back in Jungkook’s arms. His shoulders feel firm and sturdy when you put your hand back on it.
You question, “Not like a fruit today? Or like I escaped a carnival? Or perhaps as though I broke out o—”
“No. No, you don’t,” he interrupts. “You never did.”
His hand moves further up your back.
Slowly, gently.
You don’t think he should be doing any of it in public, that his expression should shift as it just did. But he’s a mystery, and you still can’t shake the glooming feeling that he’s following a greater agenda.
You wish you could trust him easier.
“Why did you insult me then?” you ask.
“It’s… what my personality was made of.”
“That’s an excuse to you? It hasn’t been too long.”
He turns you in his grip, still stepping to the sound. Keeps executing the dance perfectly; your back nearly presses against his chest. You wonder how fast his heart is beating right now.
His hair tickles your cheek, and the heat of his breath skims your neck, “You meant something way worse to me than an enemy. Sometimes I hated you enough to feel closer to you than to anyone else.”
“I…”
“And I hated it. It didn’t feel good,” he whispers, turning you back to him. The warm hand between your shoulder blades pulls you a little closer; the music is still loud, but his touches are calculated and tender. “You were one of so few who hated me openly.”
He gulps; and then adds, “And the only one who did so without scarring me permanently.”
Wait… what is he talking about? And why is his voice so quiet, carrying this odd trace of ache?
“What does that mean?” you want to know.
He shakes his head so slightly you barely notice. “Abhorring you brought me back to reality sometimes. Because where my mind resides… isn’t quite,” he looks around, up to the ceiling, side to side to every guest, “in this realm.”
You try again, “Why are you talking like that?”
His scent is too intense now. His head is tilted, his eyes drunk, though his lips didn’t touch a single class yet tonight.
“Perhaps I should’ve told you that sooner,” he says.
“Then,” you’re breathing irregularly now. The music is calmer than before, so he has an excuse to nearly press your chest against his. “Why didn’t you? Why did you keep beating me up until I broke?”
And that’s when the peculiar haze in his glance dies again. He doesn’t answer; doesn’t know what to say.
You stare at him until you can barely breathe. Stare at his eyes, his nose, the dropping corners of his blooming lips.
Memories of a laughing crowd return. When they’d mock you until the earth spun too fast. When they’d surround you and nudge your shoulder, repeat the obscenities that he priorly whispered to them.
You wish that was all there is — but the voice in your mind keeps throwing warnings at you. That this is not all he has to offer. That he will hurt you, stomp on you, burn you alive.
And when the music dies, you finally break.
Out of the trance and out of his grip.
Your hand retreats from his immediately, and you pull away from him; as other couples bow just a little and grant each other promising smiles, you turn from him and walk away.
Out of the mansion and onto the porch.
You think you hear him calling your name, repeatedly.
You’re sure he understands that any sort of relationship between you is doomed. Because you might keep looking back to the past, holding onto the sting and the guilt.
But this time, even when his voice draws closer, you choose to look ahead.
Only ever ahead.
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“I didn’t want to break you.”
You cross your arms over your chest, rubbing your skin; tonight's chill is more palpable now than when you arrived. Takes you back to the eventful night.
You don’t respond.
His steps and voice inch closer to you carefully. His movements are wary now, as though you could attack any moment. Little does he know that you’re already out of energy.
“I didn’t want to break you,” Jungkook repeats, and you move your head to the side, but don’t quite look at him. “But I justified it all by telling myself that I still had it worse.”
As Jungkook lost his father, you think he lost bits of his humanity, too.
It shows in the lack of empathy he had towards you as you grew up. In the way he’s aware of manners, but chooses not to stick to them. And right now, it shows in the way he absolutely doesn’t understand how emotions work.
You turn around, shaking your head in disbelief, “Pain is not one-sided. You will never be the only one to feel a certain thing. And no matter how bad you have it, no one deserves to be put in the same misery!”
“I know!” he exclaims, his voice echoing through the darkness, and you recoil. “I know that now. It’s part of the reason why I am here with you at all, because it’s the first time in my life that I’m seeing people as… people.”
“And why now? Why not earlier, why not later?”
Your heartbeat hastens when he moves even closer, not enough space between you; his scent returns, though it elicits something different now.
“I could’ve approached you earlier… or later. And you still would’ve asked me the same thing.”
You seal your lips once more.
He looks at you with a gaze so piercing that you feel the needles in your chest. He pokes holes into your lungs, robs your breath; his eyes are too apologetic, too sincere.
You wish you had a stronger armour.
Wish you didn’t give into his excuses so easily.
Because he’s right. Any moment in time is ideal to shatter someone; and just like that, any moment in time serves as an opportunity to turn life around.
He whispers, “I am trying to be better. And I am tired of this meaningless life.”
“But,” you try again, quieter this time, “why do you need me to be better?”
“I don’t need you for that,” he immediately explains, “but you’re the first I need to reconcile with.”
Reconciling is the wrong term. You cannot reconcile with someone who never used to be close to you in the first place.
Sometimes, you wonder whether you’re an item on his list; one that contains numerous tasks that will secure him a place in heaven. But then again…
Doesn’t everyone have one of those? Humility is rare; self-interest isn’t. You can’t even be mad.
“I know,” he mumbles, “that I called this a courtship. But… All I want is sympathy. You’re my biggest fiend for nothing, you shouldn’t be, and I…” His hand reaches out, but he doesn’t touch you yet. You focus on his fingers. “It wasn’t you who killed him, after all. Life did.”
You knew it.
Despite any pain you needed to bear in the past, your humanity never vanished. You can still read people; knew what his reasoning might have been.
You ball a hand to a fist. Blink to the ground, and then let your gaze travel over his body, up to his face. “I didn’t.”
“No… no, you just. You happened to be there that night… and maybe you shouldn’t have been.”
So if someone else had found him…
Maybe he could’ve ignited his hatred towards them. Perhaps you would’ve somehow, someway, learned to appreciate him as a friend; would’ve admired him from afar, as so many women you know do.
Or maybe you never would’ve bothered to be acquainted with him at all.
“You’re not a tool to make my mistakes undone.” His digits wander to yours, fingertips finally brushing your skin like a feather; opening your fist. “But if you could make me feel so much resentment without deserving it… maybe you can awaken some of the good feelings, too. And learn to see me as a friend, too.”
Your chest rises. Then falls. He follows the movement shamelessly, though you’re sure he doesn’t mean anything tasteless by it.
But you still feel the cold shiver snaking down your spine torturously slowly; feel the goosebumps he calls forth when his fingernail traces a line along your bare arm.
You hate that you feel that way. Hate that you can’t deny how tempting a peaceful future with him sounds. As his partner, his friend, his acquaintance — whatever may come out of this.
If he just didn’t look at you like that…
Like you’re actually someone who can affect his life when no one else could ever break his walls before.
“What do you want me to do?” you ask, stretching each word without intending to.
“I just,” he inhales, as though he’s breathing you in, “I need some time. And your patience. And in turn… I will practise restraint, too.”
That’s where his promise ends. He doesn’t elaborate on what he needs to restrain, or how much time he requires.
And you don’t ask; instead, you repeat, “You think I can awaken something good in you?”
His words merge with the whisper of the breeze, accompanied by a gentle nod and a light touch on your elbow, “And you’d deserve that affection, too.”
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The room is dark but comforting. Brightens your mood; a stark contrast to the brilliant yet dispiriting hall you last danced with him in.
This afternoon, however, passes vastly differently from when Jungkook and you bickered throughout the dance, bringing up memories neither of you was ready to relive.
No.
There’s something about today that keeps the storm at bay.
Maybe the nature of your last conversation. The touches, the freedom you granted yourself. The fact that you’re hiding your irritation towards him, and letting his humanity seep through.
And it feels good.
“You’re not used to this, right?” you whisper, leaning close to him.
He presses his lips into a line, eyebrows drawing close, and asks just as quietly, “Why would you think so?”
“I thought you spent your time at prettier places. Lush, rich, loud.”
Your eyes move from him back to the kids on the tiny stage.
The girl sitting in the middle of it showcases a confident attitude, paper in a hand that hasn’t trembled a single time. The short story she’s narrating is supposedly a dream; an idea of how she wants her future to play out.
The children around here usually speak about the parents they never knew, or the life they had up until now; topics that are far too advanced, far too mature for kids like them.
But you assume that someone who’s seen hell, has persistently thought about heaven, too.
“No,” Jungkook responds, letting out a gentle laugh. He doesn’t roll his eyes this time, and the missing negative tension pleases you. “I think it’s very nice here. Something about the kids and the happiness that surrounds them…”
“Yes, I agree. The orphanage has an overwhelming number of gifted children. They know how to make the best of their days… even though they don’t have much in life.”
Jungkook nods. Lifts his hands to applaud with the rest of the crowd, flashing a smile at the bowing girl on the stage.
A break of a minute follows; the head of the orphanage appears with a radiant grin, fond of the monthly literature and poetry nights. He announces the next presenter, hands in tight, tiny, enthusiastic fists.
Jungkook asks, “How did you find out about this?”
“My father donates,” you explain, crossing your legs under your seat. “Money, clothes, books. He finds education very important, so he likes to foster literacy around here.”
“I see.”
You hum, smile fixated on the boy now fiddling with his paper. The several times you’ve seen him before were the exact same: he always wears a beret, a white shirt, short, brown pants, suspenders attached to them.
He clears his throat each time; dark, big eyes take in the audience before he flashes a sugary sweet smile.
And then, he begins.
He rattles down the poem in a perfect pace and intonation; maintains just the right amount of eye contact; establishes himself as a future, well-known poet that you envision him as.
Eventually, when he’s nearly done, you register a shifting body, hear a sigh from your side and wait until Jungkook says, “This is… beautiful.”
Your head immediately turns towards him.
Not that you forgot that Jungkook is human, too. But the new sentiment, the glassy eyes, the soft rhythm of his voice — you barely recognise him.
You catch yourself fast, deciding to overthink later, and state, “They’re more talented than you’d know. Look at him,” you nod towards the boy taking one deep breath, preparing for the ending of his piece, “he was seven years old when he wrote his first poems.”
“How old is he now?”
“Just twelve. He’s one of the best among them. Very cherished and admired.”
Perhaps you’re too enthusiastic, maybe a little too loud. Because in the next moment, one of the women in front of you turns her head wordlessly, expression frozen and judging. Your teeth dig lightly into your lower lip, and you apologise, chiming in with Jungkook’s quiet chuckle.
His voice even more hushed than before, he leans in further; his breath is hot against your ear. “Have you ever tried writing?”
You puff out a breath, shaking your head immediately, and answer, “Oh no. I just read. I admire literature, because crafting an entire story must be… difficult.”
“Must be.”
“For now I am satisfied with frequenting this place and listening.”
You’re glowing today. It’s the first thing Jungkook noticed when he saw you approaching outside, side by side with your chaperone who hasn’t acknowledged either of you even once.
Which is why neither of you are particularly fond of bringing an observer with you.
You told him just today how you convinced your parents at a young enough age to let you roam around alone. And Jungkook… no one ever really paid much attention to this detail.
But despite the lurking presence, you’re lost in your own world. A personification of joy and tenderness, calm as a still lake, fully in your element.
So he remarks, “You seem to be fond of them.”
“Hm?” you make, and then nod with twinkles in your irises. “I used to teach some of them once a week. I would come over and read with them.”
“That’s…” Incredibly kind. Admirable. Inspiring. All the good things and more, he thinks. “A good way to spend your time.”
The words fall out casually, another sentence in a harmless conversation.
But somehow, you think he looks sad. You wonder whether he feels like he wasted his time; like he could’ve engaged in bigger, better things. You can’t decipher his thoughts.
For all you know, his expression could mean nothing.
And it changes within a heartbeat again anyway.
“And you want kids someday, too?”
The question surprises you. It really shouldn’t. In an ongoing courtship, conversations about the future usually happen way sooner — they’re not abstract, not an abnormality.
But when they come out of Jeon Jungkook’s mouth, they sound unnatural, nearly surreal.
“Uhm… someday. No rush,” you answer, thumbs circling around each other. “Right now I need to experience a little more in life before I can allow myself to think about that.”
Your response doesn’t surprise him; in fact, he agrees, nodding along — a good sign. Yet, his curiosity shines through, and he asks, “Like what?”
“Like…”
You almost don’t say it. You’re not quite embarrassed — after all, your thoughts aren’t rare, more common than people talk about. But it feels strange. You didn’t think you’d ever utter such words to him.
You surprise each other with each second you spend in the other’s company.
“Like intimacy,” you finally tell him, “love. Heartbreak. Love again, but true, pure and final this time.”
You wonder if anyone is listening in. Then again, some have already left their seat to converse with someone else, or to go home, or to snatch the food on the faraway table.
The event must be over.
Jungkook’s voice is louder now, yet calm. There’s amusement in his eyes, laced with a slice of serious interest. He’s close to you. Both your hands are planted against the bench, forefingers only inches apart from each other.
The closeness is alluring, but not as much as his words, “You’re saying all that as if you’re expecting me to fulfil some of that.”
“I…” you stutter, looking away and to his knee. “You asked. And anyway — why would you think so?”
“I mean. Am I not courting you?”
The sarcasm dripping from his words is contagious, and so is his smile. His humour consists of jokes, you have realised; he’s not trying to be condescending. If you took everything personally with him, you’d have to do the same with everyone else, too.
You might be biased, but you can be fair as well.
“Then,” you join in, teasing with a light bump of your shoulder, “what are you ready to give out of all that? Not love, I presume.”
The famous smirk returns; easy to swoon anyone anywhere else. But the people around you don’t care about royalty, nor the nearly illicit touches between you.
Because when his grin widens, cocky and confident, and his finger reaches out to circle the back of your hand, no one notices but you.
And no one but you hears him say, “Just. If it’s not love, then you might want to use your fantasy. Then you’ll know.”
The single moment of hesitation is enough for him to understand your bewilderment; but then, you deliver yourself a mental punch, tearing your hand away from his touch.
You scrunch your nose, eyebrows rising, and say, “Disgusting.”
“So,” he begins under a laugh, “you haven’t experienced intimacy or love before?”
You’re still rubbing the skin of your hand as if he burned you, vocalising in thought until a distant face flickers in your head. You tell him, “Intimacy? I have.”
You say it quietly; you don’t think he’s the most trustworthy person around, and if he did tell anyone, your reputation as a lady might be doomed. But you don’t deem him as someone who blurts such secrets to the world.
You think, and perhaps even know, that when Jungkook hurts someone, he does it in his own different ways. Looking at him, you doubt his mentality fits the rest of the rumouring, cruel society.
Clearing your throat, you continue, “Love? I thought I did. But… love is harder than that.”
“That it is.”
“What about you?”
He looks at you like a puppy, sad and despondent. “Well…” he laughs breathily, just for a moment, “love is harder.”
And that’s where the conversation ends.
The dozen questions you need to ask don’t make it out, your confusion about his melancholy lingering.
Because suddenly, a handful of children run towards you giggling, speaking over each other, calling your name as a girl orders, “Let us braid your hair!”
You lean back, surprised, touching your locks, and tell her, “But I did my hair at home!”
“Come on, we will be careful and—”
Their words overlap once more, the boys behind them scolding to leave you alone, and others urging to ask you again. Perhaps it’s your pretty dresses that lure them in each time, or the kindness they’ve learned to admire in the past months and years.
But they’ll never fail to approach you at least once every time; a true light in the darkness.
You stop their fervent banter as you get to your feet, talking over them, “Alright! Make it pretty, though. Or I will make sure no one sees me during the ride home.”
You fall back on your seat, your grin bright as you look at Jungkook.
And the next hour, he feels, passes faster than the entire week did.
You’re different like this. Different from when he met you at soirees and gatherings, different from the night that brought you together and split you apart in the first place.
There’s a trace of guilt in his heart, because for all the mean years he spent tormenting you, he missed out on all the kindness your pure heart had to offer.
He sees it now.
In the way you speak to the people around you. The way you compliment and playfully scold the children. Your witty responses, the eagerness to entertain them and be entertained by them.
Refreshing.
And once they’re done and dancing on the stage, he can’t resist but fall back into his teases. Only softer this time.
He says things like, “Some of your hair is sticking out there.” Points to a random spot on your braid and adds, “And what’s that?”
“Don’t say that!” you defend. “They tried their best.”
And each time you ramble all your protective exclaims, he nods and says, “I know. You look really pretty.”
Near the end of the evening, a hand touches your braid. Brushes down to its tail, rubbing the tresses between his fingers.
You stay as still as a sculpture, perplexed by the sudden motion; but then break into a laugh when he brings the tail to your ear, tickling you shamelessly.
When you tickle him back, you don’t succeed, and he lets you know.
“Fine,” you say, “but I can still annoy you.”
He challenges, “Can you really?”
And you try; keep trying until he grabs your wrist, pulls you in. Kills your giggles, his eyes unfathomable, but his body suggesting something quiet to come. Beguilement perhaps.
You realise once again how differently today would’ve played out if you weren’t ready for a change.
It’s baffling how much a certain mindset can change, and how much it can affect every interaction in daily life.
Especially with people like him.
You think he’s losing himself in how you look at him; you’re not sure why. You don’t understand what you did, or where the sudden change in mood came from.
But then again, it vanishes as fast as it appeared.
The same children from before call your name, standing near the snacks and waving at you, and with a sigh of strange relief, you ask, “Food?”
All he does is nod.
“Good idea.”
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“Will you let me hold your hand?”
The query comes entirely out of the blue, overshadowing the occasional neighing of the horses and the sounds of the rocky road.
You sway a little where you sit, hands in your lap. The carriage ride must have been going for ages now, and you don’t think either of you has said much in that time.
Except the random little statements about nature around you, vibrant and green, leading you to a soiree in the countryside that he spontaneously invited you to. Without chaperones at that.
You glance at his idle form in front of you, leaned back against the carriage seat. He has his cheek propped on his fist, looks as nonchalant as ever as he vocalises said query.
“Why would you want that?” you ask.
“To… feel a sliver of warmth in my terribly ill-lit life?”
You laugh quietly. Your eyes flicker back to the greenery outside, and you pull your feet back, telling him, “Stop joking.”
“But I—” He thinks for a moment, wondering how to phrase his next attempt. “I do think we’d look good together. Your hand in mine is the first thing royalty loving people might want to see, and… it’s the first thing that comes to mind when I think of you, too.”
He’s wrong. In fact, the act might cause a whisper here and there; for a fresh, yet to be established couple, it isn’t common to do such a thing publicly. But you don’t correct him just yet; you play along.
Because your stomach turns.
Jungkook is probably used to such flirtatious, suggestive remarks. He might not think of them too much, might not connect any particular emotion to it.
But to you, it does more than you’d dare yourself to allow.
Because it vexes you to admit that you’re starting to like him. No matter what your past held.
You love and hate that after numerous more promenades and events you attended together, your mind is slowly, surely pushing the pain away and giving way to a new relationship, to sunshine and rainbows.
Arguments are dying, fights almost forgotten.
You zero in on something else, still dodging his question, “First? What else?”
“What?”
“You said it’s the first thing that comes to mind. So if there is a first thing, there’s certainly a second, third, perhaps a last thing, too.”
He laughs, flashing another one of his lopsided grins. You don’t hate it as much anymore. “I’m not one to spill my secrets just like that.”
You hum, sit up, and urge, “Then… why don’t I guess?”
“I was going to suggest the same thing.”
You smile, conjuring up harmless ideas; knowing him, that’s probably not what he needs to hear, though.
“Then. You’d like to dance with me. Again,” you say.
“That is true.”
“We shall, later today then. Hmmm, what else?”
“I thought you were supposed to guess.”
“Right,” you confirm in a gentle giggle; you don’t quite notice when the sound of it makes his lips raise ever-so-slightly. “How about riding? Do you enjoy it?”
“Riding, I do. Does not involve horses, though,” Jungkook admits.
Vexation aside, you can’t suppress the childish titter that his playful words elicit. And when you speak again, it sounds merely half-serious, “You're such a crude.”
“I apologise. Continue.”
You shake your head, and then oblige, “You wish to spend more time with me… in carriages. Talking.”
“In carriages?” he wonders, raising an eyebrow at the detail. “I mean… I do like long distance carriage rides.”
“I didn’t know.”
“Until now… I didn’t either.”
Witty bastard. You’re sure that if he wrote a book on how to court a lady successfully, it’d hit the market with a bang. And get sold just as easily.
Short silence allows the both of you a soft smile. And then you speak again, “Did you mean that? The… riding thing.”
Jungkook doesn’t hesitate to answer, “I’d be a liar if I said no.”
“Mhm…”
“And you’re beautiful. I’d be a fool not to mean it, too.”
You roll your eyes, vehemently averting his menacing eyes. They don’t always resemble a doe, you’ve realised. Sometimes, they’re drooping and dangerous.
But you’re not weak enough to spiral so easily.
You think.
“Do you say that to most women to charm them?” you ask.
“Just the daughters of Viscounts.”
“Right… then, would it be too much to ask…”
You barely know what you’re hinting at, but apparently, he understands. His tongue darts out to the corner of his lips, and he looks back to the horse and its rider. Flattens his waistcoat, clears his throat, glances back once more.
And when he’s eventually made up his mind, he changes his seat swiftly and elegantly, and suddenly, he’s right next to you.
Asking, “Tell me. Would it be? Too much?”
“Would it be? To ask what you imagine,” you finish your sentence.
Jungkook shrugs his shoulders, hissing in thought before he teases, “It’d be too much indeed. It’s… A lot.”
“A lot, yes?”
“Would end up writing a book on it.”
“Then,” you say breathily, hidden in a flustered giggle. “Perhaps,” you dare, veins pumped with courage and adrenaline, “you could show me. Maybe it is easier.”
Brave. Bold. Unexpected.
The tension lingering between you for days was quiet so far — now that you’ve spoken it out, it suddenly feels… different. Hotter. And he, albeit surprised, doesn’t back away.
“Here, huh?” Your brazenness is affecting him. You see it in his eyes. Feel it in the air, know it from the way he moves closer. “You won’t let me hold your hand, but this is alright?”
You laugh, leaning in. Your shoulders touch, sparks crackling between you. Should you reach out to his thigh?
“Perhaps you can hold my hand afterwards. As a way to feign innocence,” you suggest. Your thoughts are blurred; so are your ideas.
“Shut up.”
And you do.
Because he’s the first to reach out to you.
His fingers, slow and careful, sneak to where your entangled digits rest. He grazes your skin, free of annoying gloves, pulls at your thumb just a little.
Movements stop, eyes gauging your reaction; and when you don’t refuse his touch, holding your breath in suspense, he continues.
He leads your hand away from your lap, letting it drop in the petite gap between your bodies. And then, he comes back to where your dress covers your thigh, barely touching the fabric as though to observe your response.
Your eyes dart up to his; his expression is one of a kind. Lips slightly parted, tongue sliding between his teeth, eyes digging into you with a harmless candle flame flickering behind them. 
“What’s that?” you whisper.
His focus falls back to your dress, his body moving closer, “What’s what?”
“What… are you doing?”
“What you asked me to do.”
“I…”
“What?” he muses. “Were you joking?”
No. It’s strange to admit, but you weren’t.
Your torso leans into him automatically when his forefinger runs along your leg, up to your pelvis. You press your thighs together tighter, and you guess that’s what snaps something inside him once and for all.
His breathing comes out broken, and he halts for a moment before he orders, “Come closer.”
“What?”
“Closer,” he repeats, basking in your gasp when his grip settles on your thigh, pulling you to him. “We don’t have a lot of time.”
What have you done?
Asking for such a wicked thing; more than your fragile soul can possibly bear. He’s inescapable danger, a path to ruin — what if you lose your entire mind to him before you even arrive at your destination?
“What are you gonna do?” you ask him, though you can’t resist his pull.
Jungkook’s head falls to the side just a little, one eyebrow cocking and teeth worrying his tinted lower lip. He breathes in through his nose, and then warns, “Will you stop asking so many questions?”
And then, without a single warning, his arm priorly skimming your dress wraps around your waist. You let out a tiny yelp, and a moment later, you find yourself half on his lap, swinging dangerously.
But in his hold, you’re sure you’re not going anywhere.
“Closer now,” he repeats once more, and this time, you oblige.
You shift in his lap, making yourself comfortable on your seat; not given a generous amount of time before his fingers return home.
“I’ve been waiting for this, you know?” You have, too. “Just,” he purrs against the shell of your ear, “want to see how much we can get out of you. Just like that.”
Just like that?
A question floats through your mind, soon to be extinguished when a strong hand parts your legs and moves up. He palms your hot, clothed cunt wordlessly, never preparing you for anything; you choke, eyes squinting shut.
And then, said palm begins to move.
Slowly at first, accompanied by sudden burning kisses along your neck.
He’s never kissed you before.
His lips feel inviting. Hot. Too good.
A quiet voice whispers, “How’s that?”
And you, losing yourself gradually, answer, “Here,” you bring two of his fingers to where your nub aches for him, moving it in a miniscule circle, “touch me here.”
“Like th—”
He swallows the last word when your hips move on his lap; what grows underneath you robs your breath, poking between the cheeks of your ass. You tilt your head for him to kiss you deeper.
“Fuck,” he curses. His unoccupied hand immediately shuts your sudden cry as he bites into your shoulder, pressing harder against your clit. “You’re even worse than me.”
Along with the waves of pleasure, pride crashes against the shore, too; you don’t like a one-sided game.
What did he expect from you?
His bulge soon rock hard, you rub your butt against it in a delicious rhythm. Every now and then, your focus falters, wiggling when his fingers move around your pussy particularly well.
You never thought you’d ever let Jeon Jungkook dig his fingers into your entrance over two layers of clothing.
Or that you’d ever voluntarily enter the same carriage as him at all.
This is either a heavenly dream or a neverending nightmare.
He ruts his hips against you, seeking relief; his eyes only flash open when you tease, “You’re pretty desperate… aren’t you?”
And that’s when another nearly silent groan breaks against your skin. Just as quickly as he tugged you onto him, he’s swirling you around, as carefully as the congested space allows.
He pushes your back against the inner wall of the carriage, his body following. Your mouth drops open when his lips attach to your neck again, sucking harder now, the pace and force nearly bruising.
Knee hoisted up on the seat, he pushes it between your parted legs, allowing at least a hint of reprieve as he busies his hands with something else now.
Impatient fingers hold the nape of your neck, lips kissing a trail to the mounds of your breasts. You sigh, wishing he could swallow you whole, a carve between your eyebrows as he says, “So what if I am? I mean, you… You have never been so…” He places a wet kiss near your cleavage. “Breathtaking.”
God, you ache to reach out to the growing bulge.
You ache to kiss his lips; his everything.
But when the wish threatens to burst out, the coachman, hopefully oblivious, yells back, “We’re arriving shortly!”
Arriving.
Right.
You’re going somewhere. You nearly forgot about time and space.
And all this began with a conversation about hand-holding and horses, didn’t it?
Jungkook’s eyes slowly lift to yours. The warmth of his fingers returns to your face. He looks at you deeply, carefully, breathlessly. Mutters a little, “Shit,” persisting on not backing away.
His mouth is close enough for you to stop your heartbeat; your cheeks are heated beneath his touch.
And then, reality dawns on you.
It’s perilous, the proximity when you’ll probably be passing other carriages very soon. Come to a halt among a crowd of guests, in front of whatever house he’s brought you to.
Society is close — so you break the tension, and joke, “Hide whatever grew in your pants.”
His laugh is sudden, sweet. It differs from the desire that previously bloomed in his eyes, now playful and casual as he promises, “Later. We’ll continue later.”
You use the last two minutes to tidy yourself up as much as possible. Fortunately, Jungkook didn’t dishevel your hair, so you should be good to go.
As you arrive, stepping out, the first thing you notice is that this is not a house. This is an unaffordable luxury. Trees and flowers burgeon everywhere, like a big, blossoming garden. A breathtaking scent, lovely and inviting.
The sky is azure blue, brighter here than in the city, and the heat of the sun isn’t as stinging due to the gentle gust.
But the people? Same old news.
The initial process passes fast. Various things that you expected; various things you brush off fast.
Like, the overexaggerated kindness and enthusiasm of the stranger hostess. Or the loud laugh and slightly inappropriate comments of her husband.
The side-eyes some throw at you, as if you’re the only new face around here. Or perhaps, you are, you wouldn’t know.
And the silent judgement of one of Jungkook’s acquaintance’s eyes, one you do not know, verbalising the strange statement, “Every other woman before wasn’t good enough, was she?”
To this day, you don’t understand the malicious nature of some people. Why they hide their insecurities behind a presumptuous mask, throwing insults straight to your face just upon arriving.
You want to snap back, but before you’ve uttered a single word, Jungkook defends, “Well, I for one am glad no one was.”
Suppressing the smile proves harder than you thought; and when you’re looking at him again, you bet you’re radiating brighter than the sun hanging in the sky.
You register only faintly when the woman laughs, as though he’s cracked a joke, wishes you fun at the fete, nods kindly and walks away.
Ambiguous little snakes.
But who could focus on split tongues and slit-formed pupils when a way brighter charm is standing right next to you? Shaking his head in frustration, rolling his eyes at people’s audacity.
Angry for you; defending you.
Funny, because he used to be the same.
Perhaps he really is trying to change.
You move closer, smile, and breathe, “Jungkook?”
“Yes.”
Who cares what society thinks?
“It’d be okay to hold my hand now.”
You hold his gaze carefully, possibly doting; when he smiles, crinkles appear around his eyes. He fits your palm in his, nods just a little, and then says, “Pleasure, princess.”
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Walking deeper into the hall feels different this time.
The carriage’s mood and the touch of his hand elevate your senses, your heart a blissful mess despite the stupidity of the guests outside.
You catch your lower lip between your teeth, because this event is a lot more high-spirited than any other you’ve ever attended before.
“Who was the host?” you ask as you come to a stand; your hand moves to his elbow, just for elegance’s sake, and you point across the room to the man who greeted you.
“It’s one of my uncle’s friends. He’s an Earl,” he explains, leaning to your ear, “they have a son with the name Namjoon who married another rich lady from high society, and that’s why they’re able to live in such luxury.”
Makes sense.
The last ball you went to was hosted by an always-invisible Marquess, so the amount of diamonds hanging from the chandelier tonight shouldn’t surprise you after all.
You don’t think you know too many faces around here. Considering that you rode out to the countryside, a fair distance from your home, you don’t expect to recognise anyone, either. Except perhaps two or three souls floating around, nodding towards you as they pass you by.
The slight hint of familiarity relieves you, but even in its absence, you would’ve been immensely grateful that Jungkook brought you here. To introduce you to the relevant fellowship of the family must be the highest honour, right?
As your gaze wanders from a row of candelabras to the dancing crowd, and then back to Jungkook’s smile, he compliments, “I think I prefer this dress to the one last time. Suits you even better.”
“It very much felt like you wanted to rip it off me just minutes ago,” you jest, nudging his sides, “but thank you.”
“Well I can appreciate the dress and want it… not on you. Right?”
The rapture pools in your lower belly and tickles you; you attempt your hardest to not let the treacherous sigh topple out of your mouth.
“I assume that makes sense,” you say.
“I’ll like any dress on you as long as you don’t wear one of those… those with arched bottoms. I don’t even have a name for them.”
You roll your eyes, groaning just a little, “Don’t remind me. They’re like tents for butts.”
Jungkook chuckles, bringing his hands together to slap with his snicker. And when the two of you have calmed down again and wiped the tears of your very personal joy, he asks, “How do you like it?”
Your gleaming grin is contagious, and Jungkook can’t deny his joy when you exclaim under your breath, “It’s beautiful!”
“Right? Each time there’s something new,” he explains, open palm gesturing to an artwork near the snack table. “Like this glass sculpture.”
You nod towards it, though it’s impossible to miss. “That one?”
“Wasn’t there last time.”
“They like to make their nights memorable, it seems.”
A hum vibrates in Jungkook’s chest, unspoken compliments stuck in his throat as he, instead, subtly hints, “I think, for me, tonight will be the most memorable.”
Caterpillars previously crawling through your stomach, filling you with utmost hate and displeasure, flutter as butterflies across your torso now. Whatever confessions would have riled you up not long ago, are now desired. Your heart craves them.
Perhaps you’re weak and naive after all.
“...Really?” you mumble.
Jungkook smiles with his eyes, too, you noticed. The crinkles at the corners of them, the night sky inside them, the joy around them. His nose sometimes scrunches in the most devastating honey-sweet way; his lower lip is tilted.
An everlasting, unique beam.
It was all there before.
Only now, you know to appreciate it.
His body shifts to yours almost unnoticeably, shoulders barely touching. The picture of the two of you standing there is the exact same as last time, but whatever is blooming with you makes the crucial difference.
“Really,” he confirms.
“You’re… quite enticing.”
You’re joking, but then again, you’re not. You’re trying to elicit a reaction out of him, delighted when he obliges just right, “Am I? Can’t we just…” He sighs, looking around. “Go back to the carriage?”
“Oh, I’d be more than ready to, but society i—”
Mid-sentence, a movement catches your attention. A joyful, familiar face rushes to Jungkook, and you immediately recognise him as Jeon Junghyun — future heir, widely admired, brother to the black sheep.
He nods towards you, your eyes twinkling; you’ve heard nothing but delightful stories about him, so it’s a pleasure to see him after such a long time again.
But he doesn’t regard you much longer before he’s rambling about taxes and random names, urging Jungkook to follow him to introduce him to what’s-her-name. 
“It can’t wait?” Jungkook asks, regarding you with an apologetic look.
“The quicker, the better.”
You place a hand on his arm, assuring, “Go. I will be here and waiting. Lords can’t escape duty, after all.”
His lips curl to another sorry smile, and a moment later, he gives in, letting his brother tug him to a small circle of top notch people that you can’t assign names to.
For a minute, you watch as he mingles with the crowd, effortlessly fitting in. He doesn’t think too high of royalty or the tasks that surround it, but he still knows how to behave when he’s thrown and forced into such a situation.
You think he admires you, but he’s not that low of a personality eith—
“Oh, it’s you!” someone says to you. You turn to a face you noticed earlier, from the city, someone who frequents parties as much as you. “I didn’t think you’d be here.”
You remember his name to be Byun.
He isn’t anyhow close to you. His mother, a past friend of your own, introduced him to you years ago; as far as you recall, he is easy to converse with, but you don’t think either of you approached the other much after that.
“I did not think I would see you here, either,” you remark.
You sharply hope he doesn’t ask you to dance. You remember your mother telling you that you should never reject a gentleman when he asks for one; or else, you won’t be permitted to do so with anyone that night at all.
And you desperately need a round of harmonious swaying with Jungkook tonight.
But despite the sickeningly sweet smile, Byun doesn’t broach that subject, instead nodding towards Jungkook’s laughing body and remarking, “I didn’t know you two met?”
You know why your mother broke off her friendship with his. You recall her complaints about how that woman had no manners, never asking for anyone’s wellbeing, not interested in small talk as long as it benefitted her.
You reckon her son is similar, because as he skips formalities and jumps straight to your company tonight, you internally cringe.
Smacking your lips, you hope he doesn’t prod, and simply tell him, “We’re becoming… friends.”
“That’s good,” he praises, nodding, “Oh, I… I am not trying to court you, I need you to know that. I just needed to at least ask if he’s treating you right.”
And again, you remember that you do not share a bond with him whatsoever. So you’re suspicious about his sudden curiosity, confused as you question, “Why are you asking that?”
His answer comes immediately; he shrugs with a glass of champagne in his hand. “Because he has… a reputation.”
And you’re quick to say, “He’s not that horrible.”
“I do hope that. I’ve heard he’s not very fond of relationships or affection. My friends call him The Fluke Duke.”
You scoff. Funny, because Jungkook isn’t a Duke at all.
One look at him makes you feel bad immediately. He’s currently staring through the room, drinking nothing much but a glass of water, but for a very brief moment, as though he felt your gaze on him, his eyes meet yours.
You catch a tender smile, but when he spots the stranger conversing with you, his eyes narrow for just a moment. Relaxing when you give him a little wave.
You tell Byun, “That’s incredibly mean. He’s not so bad, I promise… Sometimes you just need to give people a chance.”
He doesn’t seem convinced. Not that you could care — you didn’t come to defend Jungkook all night.
“Sure,” Byun says, “I was solely wondering, because — and don’t take this as an offence — I’m aware that you’re a big man’s daughter. But someone like a Lord usually courts someone of his kind. Or at least announces the courtship in a more respectable way.”
Respectable?
You know he doesn’t mean bad, but the choice of his words doesn’t particularly please you.
You breathe in; patience is a virtue. “Well, Jungkook… he tends to be careful. He won’t court me and have all eyes of society shame us, should it not work out.”
“Not bad. Quite smart.”
The music chiming until now fades, and with it, your chat dies, too. You don’t respond, averting your eyes from him, and when he’s realised that you’re done with him, he raises his glass and says, “To the both of you.”
Slowly, a hand in his pocket, he walks away when Jungkook steps back to you.
A woman in tow, he finishes his dialogue with her; you don’t know whether you’re imagining the glitter in her eyes, but you do know that her hand on his shoulder is happening.
So is the gorgeous smile. 
And once she’s bid her goodbyes, you cock an eyebrow, stupidly half jealous, half fooling around, and ask, “A lady winning your heart?”
His eyes raised to yours, his initial smile drops, as though you’ve suggested something profoundly heinous. He blinks, and then responds, “Absolutely not.”
“But why not?” you continue, fallen back into a good mood in Jungkook’s proximity, playful bicker on your mind. “You’re handsome, aren’t you? A catch for sure.”
You think that’s what your relationship has become. That you can banter about such things, even if just for fun; just two days ago he did the same at a picnic.
But you guess he did it in a wittier way; your suggestions, he doesn’t seem to enjoy.
And he hesitates in irritation, overwhelmed by your sudden, odd inquiry. You must say, even for someone as unashamed as you, this came out of nowhere, and you definitely could have cracked a better joke.
Looking closely, you see him clench his jaw, warning through obviously gritted teeth, “Don’t say such things.”
“Oh, I…” you pause, gulping. Was that so bad? “I didn’t mean it. I was just joking that anyone would want you, and—”
Shut up. Shut up. Just…
Your gaze drops to your shoes, and you mumble something under your breath, eyebrows lifted. You fold your fingers, eyes big, intended on asking him what the hell you did before your breath hitches.
He doesn’t give you a single moment to prepare for the sudden pull, fingers wrapped around your wrist and tugging you into an unknown direction.
You wonder whether he’s aware that someone might be watching. But you can’t really see his face, trudging along behind him; not aware of his quiet anger until you’ve climbed the staircase and entered an empty room in a lonely hallway.
The door locks behind you, and he cards his fingers through his hair, sarcastically chuckling before he tells you, “That was humiliating.”
You’re baffled. “W… wait, what?”
“It was humiliating, because we were done discussing business and I was just telling her that we might go further than whatever we’re doing now. That we’re very friendly with each other. So it was embarrassing that you’d say such a thing and bash my loyalty.”
You think he is overreacting. No one even heard what you said.
But something in you tells you that his agitation doesn’t quite derive from whatever you did down there.
“Other than that,” he adds, “she is a childhood friend. Like a sister.”
You watch his finger gesture around, the other hand on his hip, and you say, “I’m sorry, I… didn’t mean to do that. In fact,” your voice grows louder when he laughs, “I was even telling Byun how pleasant of a company you are.”
“Were you now? To Byun, yes?”
“I was. I know him from town, so feel free to ask him anytime, if you’d like. But th—”
“I don’t need to. But my reputation is already dead, and I don’t want it to be tainted in your eyes, too. And…” He pauses, suddenly calm. He licks his lips, his gaze pungent. “Do you know what truly irritated me?”
You don’t answer.
A moment later, he confesses, “I was talking to her… and she was suggesting all those women in the room. To her defence, she didn’t know I’m here with you, but she was pointing to half a dozen girls, listing their traits.”
You don’t know where this is going; not an idea why this irritates him. He just couldn’t care, right?
But you keep listening.
“And then I… I realised that the time for finding comfort in other women is truly over. I just wanted you as a friend, but…” He moves closer slowly. Fingertips on your arm again, lips close to your cheek. “Watching someone stand so close to you… I told myself it doesn’t bother me, but it does.”
“Is that… is that why we’re here now? I haven’t done anything, have I?” you ask carefully, confused when he shakes his head in frustration. “I mean, I— you reacted too much. Jealousy is why we’re he—”
“No. You being you… me wanting, craving you all the damn time. Me finally realising it. That’s why I’m furious… It enrages me.”
Pause.
You fall silent; and so does your heartbeat.
His voice trembles a bit, the gulp audible. “More than anything.”
And... that’s it. The point of no return.
Maybe that’s when all of you breaks.
Or when it was supposed to break.
The tension gathered in the last days, exchanged through distance and every moment without each other, through telling glances and subtle touches… it catches up with you, gathers on your lips and unleashes when you push yourself forwards.
He whispers your name, and you mutter back, “Jungkook…”
And then, your mouth falls on his with vigour.
Hands bury in his hair, back arching; he swallows your gasps, your taste, your sweetness.
The reciprocation happens without a moment of delay; your body beseeches him to come closer. 
The kiss never allows a gentle second. Before you know it, you’re drunk on his tongue, stumbling backwards until your bottom hits a wooden table.
You hate the transformation that occurred within those few days. Hate how his hands cup your face; fingers then shifting to hold your chin; then, a palm against your back like he’s treasuring you.
Lips on your neck. Breaths against your veins. Teeth on your shoulders.
God, you despise him now more than ever. Hate that he’s so difficult to truly detest, despite his irksome flaws and incorrigible nature.
Especially when he breathes against your goosebumps like this, mouth ghosting over the mounds of your breasts. Toying with your dress.
He whispers, “My God, you enrage me… yet I need you near me all the time.”
A swift movement, and he’s turned you around. He must be scarring your skin with the way he plants kisses on the juncture connecting your neck and shoulder. 
His digits journey down your back, fumbling with the sleeves of your dress. Unabashed, he pushes them your shoulder, all the way down over your breasts, revealing the corset that truly makes it hard to breathe right now.
He fiddles with the strings of it, loosening the knot, and says, “I hate those fucking things.”
You too. Now more than ever.
He allows some space to breathe, but never really opens your corset fully; it dangles half closed around your torso.
Gentle touches skim the skin between your shoulder blades, kisses abundant wherever he’s able to reach. And once he needs more, he brings a seeking hand to the front, engulfing one of your breasts firmly.
You reach back, touching his cheek and his hair, cutting yourself on the jawline before his free hand grasps your wrist and pins it against your back.
“God, your scent is driving me crazy,” he confesses, nose brushing along your cheek.
And all you manage to respond with is a weak, “Touch me.”
“Where?”
”Anywhere.”
His words turn into a salacious whisper, promising you, “I am.”
You shake your head, biting your lip, stifling a moan. And when he lets you go, his touches easing, you claim, “I want more.”
“Figured you did. After what happened earlier—”
“You were cruel to stop there.”
He leans down, chuckling against your back, and you shiver as he asks, “So what? I couldn’t bend you over in the carriage, could I?”
A response sits patiently in the forefront of your mind, temporarily shut down when he lifts the hem of your dress and exposes your legs.
His face keeps shifting downwards; your mind conjures an idea of what he might be doing, but the anticipation is still killing you.
Neverending, not even when he pushes the dress further up, frees you of your undergarment and shoves your torso down onto the table. His hot breath fans your increasing wetness, and you nearly feel shy about your bare lower parts.
But then you remember that you’ve never been timid in his presence; and you won’t start now either.
Though him being in charge isn’t such a bad thing.
He asks, “How does that feel?”
That is nothing more but the still seething breathing against your cunt. So you lift your lips to a smile, your voice mocking as you admit, “It feels like you’re teasing me.”
But his words carry a tinge of confidence, cocky when he deduces, “But I think that’s what you like. Slow and careful… and to prolong the pleasure until you can’t take it anymore. You like that I’m controlling it, right?”
“I… hate you,” is all you can bring up.
“No…” Two fingers suddenly dip between your folds, never inside, “try again.”
The gentle touch nearly makes your body jolt forward. You didn’t expect it so soon, didn’t know it could feel so good without any piece of clothing between him and you.
He rubs slowly, up and down, testing your dampness. Your arms reach forward, clutching the top end of the conveniently empty table; the wood feels cool against your cheek.
Your eyes shut, butt lifting, turning in tight circles as he moves his fingers in geometrical patterns.
And then, his fingers disappear, his panting drawing closer and—
Suddenly, the tip of his tongue plunges in; and you cry out.
A semi-harsh slap lands on your ass, and remains there, squeezing almost painfully. A thousand sensations rush through your veins, and you can’t muster anything more than a stifled, broken moan.
His tongue retreats, and he asks, “Do you still hate me?”
“If hating you… makes you do such things,” you breathe; you’re not sure if he can hear you, “then yes.”
When his lips close in again, only touching your folds, you feel a laugh vibrate against your skin. The feeling of it makes your knees tremble, but his hands push your body up, allowing him to dive deeper.
You realise immediately that he’s experienced, and far more than you at that.
Because he isn’t harsh with your body; or at least not yet. He doesn’t thrust his tongue into you like a maniac, not biting you in his haze.
No.
He moves his wet muscle in figure eights, lapping up your juices with lewd kisses. He moves back once to spit on your cunt, and then comes back to wrap his mouth around your sex, flicking his tongue over your clit occasionally.
God.
Holy fuck; how could you miss out on all that for so long? Just because of some stupid fight?
You can’t move; you can’t form a thought. The ardent sensation kills all of them.
You attempt to reach back to him again, cursing under your breath — but he doesn’t quite want to allow you that touch for now. Snatches your wrist, pins it against the small of your back once again like it’s a habit.
“Hold on a little more,” he whispers when he pulls back for a moment, out of breath. “Just a little more. I need to…”
He pauses, lets the rest of the sentence dangle.
Comes back to your dripping pussy; but this time, it’s not all he delivers. He lets your hand go, fingers suddenly at your entrance; and without a word, he pushes two of them in to his knuckles.
You scream out, but immediately bite your lip, worried someone might hear your forbidden affair.
His digits turn and curl, shoving into you carefully and repeatedly; his tongue never leaves, drinking all of you in. Your sounds make his eyes roll into his head, mingling with his own moans and craze.
He tilts his head, lips buried in and kissing you feverishly; tasting you thoroughly. You’re slowly losing your mind; his hums are too low in your pussy, the smack of his lips too outrageous.
And an embarrassingly short while later, you’re breaking.
Breaking hard and with passion, with shaking legs and unintelligible words.
His touch rotates over your clit, his hands shooting up to hold your ass, so you don’t fall. Your reactions are as seductive as they can get; they make his lower parts ache.
And once he’s parted from you again, he finally concludes, “I needed to finish what we started before. Desperately.”
Sure. He can keep talking if he’d like. You barely register anything.
“Yes,” you only say, catching yourself, stopping the spinning of your head.
Rushing, he gets to his feet, capturing a handful of your butt once more as he angles his body. His clothed member presses against you, rubbing dryly between your ass cheeks, and his lips roam over your head, lowering to your earlobe.
“You sounded so pretty, falling apart like that,” he whispers, kissing your jaw as his hand moves to your chin, “just how I fucking thought you would.”
“Jungkook, I wa—”
Your wish remains unfinished — because the touch around your chin vanishes, instead reappearing around your mouth when he digs a thumb and ring finger into your cheeks.
He parts your lips, forcing them open, and asks, “A taste?”
Despite his beastly nature, he utters his ask for permission tenderly, and your body quivers at the uncommon decency.
You stick out your tongue, registering his fleeting groan, and suck his digits in when he places them inside. Steady movements of your head force an idea into his head, and his breathing falls irregular, his head dizzy.
His grunts are low and inviting; fuck, you want him to split you asunder.
You’ve barely licked all of you off his fingers when he pulls you up, turns you around and faces you with raging flames in his eyes.
Your lips collide again, breaths leaving through your noses. Your body tenses, pliant under his touch; tingling where his fingers land.
He doesn’t know how much you craved his taste. Doesn’t know that you’d lie on your bed staring at the ceiling, hands under your blanket doing what he hadn’t done yet.
Closing your eyes, imagining his mouth on yours. And in reality, the feeling is so much sweeter, lovelier, prettier.
Not what you imagined, but more.
And there’s so much that was missing in your fantasies.
Like, how he wraps a palm around your neck now, pushing in ever-so-slightly. Your head tilts when his does, the kiss deep, his tongue hot and skilled; you taste yourself on it again.
Jungkook holds you in place, ridiculously tight… as if you would ever make the mistake of walking away now.
The unspoken words and the burgeoning insanity have you under a firm grip, and even if he stepped back now, you wouldn’t move by a hair’s breadth.
And yet, you push him from you when his kisses continue on your jaw and your neck. The corset is slipping off, possibly flashing your breasts; and you want him to touch you there, you do.
But the anticipated fondling can wait; you’re salivating too much.
So you gaze into his confused face as you push at his chest; he’s probably wondering if he hurt you anyhow. But you surprise him when you entangle your fingers with his, eyes never leaving his as you slowly, carefully, drop to your knees.
The shock in Jungkook’s face is priceless.
“You… you don’t have to,” he says.
You move your head left and right, “I know.”
“Honestly, just because I—”
“Shut up,” you command, toying with his breeches before you pull them down to his knees.  “I’m doing it, because I want to. I’ve been wanting it…”
“Oh… you…”
Undergarments follow; and what awaits you underneath is far more generous than what you expected. And definitely ten times harder than you foresaw.
Pre-cum trickles out of his member’s head, and you wrap a hand around the girth before it can slap back against his stomach, tainting his grey waistcoat.
He winces at the touch, hissing when you move. Fuck, his responses have you reeling; boosting your confidence until you can’t hide your smirk. You continue your ministrations, still high from your own release, but twisting and moving your wrist perfectly.
And when you see his thighs tense, his eyes closing, you lean in and lick his tip for just a moment. A soft swirl of your tongue around his head, collecting the leaking liquid, has him hissing.
The action repeats, over and over again, delicately and diligently, and you revel in his groans. He whispers your name in a manner so filthy that it alone urges you to take him in deeper.
And the way his hips move an inch, longing to thrust into your mouth is both amusing and breathtaking at once.
“Fuck, darling,” he mumbles, and you lift your gaze to his open mouth. If he didn’t control himself, he’d be drooling, you think. “A bit more.”
And you gratify his request.
Breathing through your nose, mustering strength and shoving him in until you gag. His cock is heavy on your tongue. Hot and thick, too much to fit him all in. It twitches in your mouth, releasing pre-cum into your throat repeatedly.
And God, you’re relishing every damn moment.
You nod with his length inside, humming and moaning, and he says, “And I was worried you’d… you’d punch me if I kissed you.”
Goddamn.
You ignore him.
You ignore that he imagined kissing you, that he overthought your reaction, that you were and are one of his daily thoughts at all.
Rather, you focus on not faltering, on keeping your pace, making him break as much as he shattered you. The aftereffect still lingers, your pussy aching and pulsating. Or perhaps, it’s happening again.
Perhaps you’re just yearning for more.
And with the thought pulling at the strings of patience, you swallow around him harder, hollowing your cheeks, fingers wandering to the end of his shaft and then to his balls. They’re firm and full, but you want them empty; released wherever he desires to.
“Didn’t think you’re so good,” Jungkook says, probably more to himself than to you. His speech is blurred. “My God, you’re…”
“Hmmm,” is all you do with your mouth stuffed to the brim; but when you release his cock with a pop, you ask breathlessly, “you sound tormented.”
“Yes, that’s a good alternative to absolutely dying to tear you apart,” he growls through gritted teeth, “more. Keep going.”
“Yes, sir.”
Which only spurs him on further; he fists his cock for a second, pumping, taps it against your tongue when you stick it out, and then pushes in once more.
“Ohhh, you’re the devil,” Jungkook breathes, laughing shakily as he watches his dick disappear in your mouth bit by bit. “I want to do something, but…”
“Mh?” you make again, coating him in more of your saliva.
“Don’t want to hurt you.”
You shake your head, closing your eyes. Pleased when his warm palm comes down to your face, caressing your cheek. He knows he must not mess up your hair tonight, so his digits float back to the nape of your neck again.
And you understand exactly what he desires when he says, “Nod just once if it is alright for me to…”
You do. You do so with utter keenness.
He says, “Pinch my thigh if you need me to stop.”
You nod once more.
And a moment later, his finger wrap around the back of your neck tighter, planting his feet firmly against the ground before—
His body falls a tiny bit forward when he rams his cock inside you; not stopping there, but repeating the action. Over and over again, relentlessly. His hips work with barely any remorse, his hand keeping your head in its spot.
He looks down to you, dark hair strands covering his eyes. The muscles of this face are tense, his jaw clenched, the puffed breaths unsteady and hectic.
“Shit… that mouth does a lot more than talk shit.”
All manners gone, his words become crude, provoking a reaction out of you. But you’re nearly immobile, moving according to the orders of the puppeteer above you; only gaining back control when he finally lets you breathe.
And that’s when you ready yourself for retribution, revenging your sore throat. You shift on your knees, ignoring the pain on them inflicted by the ground, and suck in one heavy breath before you unleash your true beast on him.
Jungkook stumbles again, speechless in surprise; judging the hardness of his balls, you know he won’t last much longer.
And you’re right.
He protests almost immediately, telling you, “Don’t… I want to—”
You don’t know what he wants. You keep going.
And perhaps you’d actually stop if his body didn’t beg otherwise. If he truly snapped at you, told you to back away, you would.
But you know he won’t.
Because his hips still shoot towards you, soon giving up, muttering, “Fuck, you are a brat, aren’t you? Of course you would never listen to me.”
You understand only every other word. He doesn’t allow much peace to your mind, slamming in, loving the saliva dripping from your chin.
And just a minute later, he’s emptied himself inside you, rope by rope, a salty taste and muffled moans.
Surreal. How did you go from absolute hate to… this?
Surreal.
The moment stretches endlessly; his movements are sudden, arhythmic.
It takes him a full minute to recover, though his panting suggested that he would never find his way back to reality again. But once you’ve processed his taste and he’s calmed down, a helping hand falls in front of your face.
As your palm touches his, he lifts you to your feet; an arm wraps around you and he pulls you in, still shaking, his gaze intense. A smile plays around his lips, affectionate and tender, and he says, “That was not what I had planned.”
“I apologise. It was hard to resist.”
“That I saw,” he chuckles, folding his fingers behind your back, “but I am in no position to complain. You looked gorgeous like that.”
“Did I, now?”
“A beautiful view, indeed.” His face nears yours, angling to the side. Lips stop with a tiny gap’s distance from your own mouth, and he promises, “Next time, I want more than that, though. And I won’t give up then.”
“I won’t be in a position to complain either,” you utter, joining his laugh, caressing his hair.
“Well, you’ll be in a vastly different position altoge—”
You flinch when a firm knock sounds against the door. The colourful illusion broken, you land back in the dark room, immediately parting and fumbling with your clothes. Jungkook pulls his pants up, the door catching his attention, and then you.
“Turn around,” he tells you quickly, doing his best at the corset’s knot. He looks to and fro for a little longer, and when the knock chimes once more, Jungkook whispers to you, “More wasn’t supposed to happen tonight anyway, huh?”
You stifle a laugh, backing away. He runs his fingers through his hair, hurrying to the window, checking his reflection until he’s satisfied with himself.
And then, he steps to you and tells you, “Two minutes. Leave a little after me, yes?”
You nod, and he imitates, fixing your hair and grabbing your face in his hands to press one last kiss on your mouth.
Then, he moves away. You scan the room, finding some darkness to hide behind.
When Jungkook clutches the handle of the door, he looks back at you once more; he can’t see you in the shadows, but he still smiles, takes a breath and then steps out.
You don’t catch a glimpse of the person outside, but you hear the man asking what the hell Jungkook was doing in there. He utters a senseless excuse back, and a moment later, the room falls silent.
Everything stops as fast as it began.
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Hidden between furniture, your breathing doesn’t steady for the following couple minutes. You hold a still shaky hand to your heart, chuckling, unable to fathom a thought; because never in your wildest dreams did you fantasise about such a deeply personal occurrence.
When enough time has passed, and your attire is decent once more — or at least enough for oblivious guests to not suspect a single thing — you finally leave the room.
The door creaks open, and you grimace, hoping that no one observed the two of you vanishing into and appearing out of the same dark room.
You flatten your dress, head looking from left to right.
Which side did you come from?
You barely remember. It’s lit here, but it’s still somewhat scary. Several portraits decorate the walls; the hallway isn’t infinite, but both ends show a curve — one must lead to the staircase.
You noticed none of this when he dragged you here. 
Eventually and instinctively, you choose left, because you’ll definitely come out somewhere, right?
You draw an invisible line along the wall, humming the melody of the music you heard downstairs. The thousand and millions of butterflies still float through your tummy, the heat in your cheek lingering and a glowing smile plastered to your face.
Perhaps he was right indeed.
Perhaps you will be able to forgive each other, feel fondness and replace the gloom, forget the past and your childish feud.
From the way he looked at you, his sentiment seemed and felt real. You won’t necessarily claim he’s in love with you, and you probably aren’t either yet, but you do think that he’s at least reached a stage of affection for you.
One very well reciprocated.
Your steps are light. Your memory filled with the overall gentle mood you just escaped from. Despite the partly feral touches, it felt like he was taking care of you more than anything.
So, maybe… drawing a conclusion from the goddamn grin on your face, you can look past all the misery that you waded through an—
“Why did you drag me here? I have somewhere else to be.”
The familiar dulcet voice stops you in your tracks.
It’s faint, not quite in your proximity, but close enough for you to register immediately; undoubtedly his. You’d recognise the sweet timbre anywhere by now, not least of all because you heard it whisper promises into your ear just minutes ago.
You step into its direction, noticing a door standing ajar. The room is dimly lit, and you can’t see him from where you are. There’s a curious urge to push the door open, see what’s going on.
But then, another voice speaks up, deeper, his absolute contrast, “I won’t keep you here for long.”
“What do you want?”
The other man is upset; if the click of his tongue doesn’t suggest that, the tone of his voice surely does, “Why are you talking to me like that? I thought it was you who wanted to leave the town.”
Hold on.
What?
Jungkook wants to leave the town? 
Hmm. Odd.
He didn’t tell you anything about this…
“I know,” he confirms. You try your best to not let it get to you, not questioning what that makes of whatever is transpiring between you — because maybe, he wants to take you with him. “But it doesn’t have to be right away.”
“Why?” The other chuckles, clearly in mock. “What happened?”
Jungkook pauses. Thinks. You almost walk away again, fearing he might flee the room. But then, he simply says, “It can wait.”
“You begged for it for ages. I told you you can walk away, I don’t care. But not alone.”
“I know—”
“I meant it.”
For some reason, the voice sounds familiar to you. You rack your brain, because where have you heard him before…
You listen in as the man adds, his tone sharp, uncivil, “You get married, and you can leave. I’m not betting on you or giving you any money just for you to use it on your usual shenanigans, drinking and whores.”
“Stop. I know. You don’t need to repeat it to me every single day.”
This is…
You have a hunch who that man might be.
You blink. Your heart plummets to your stomach.
What?
Is that why… you’re here? He wants to leave, marry you, take you away just to escape this haunted place?
Are you an option for him to break free? To forget his old life, to start something better, but just for himself?
And if that’s what he wants… why you? Of all people. Because of your status? Your reputation?
“I’ll do anything to get out of here, so do not worry. I have it all planned out,” you hear Jungkook say.
Anything.
Like, make someone marry him for his own benefit.
You feel ill.
Stumbling back, you press your back against the wall. You should leave, run away, stop listening in on their deal and whatever else might’ve been discussed in the shadows.
Your throat dries out. You focus on staying silent, because if you do anything remotely loud now, you’ll be caught spying.
Shit. How could you dive head-first into such a thing?
He wouldn’t change. You knew from the beginning who he was, what made him, him. Why would it differ in a week? In a month? Just because he said it…
The sour taste on your tongue, the self-pity, and the bitter feeling of betrayal irk you.
Your eyes shut close, and only then do you notice that they’ve stopped talking. You move your head to the side just a little, nearly expecting that he’ll rip the door open, see you standing and slowly falling.
He’ll probably feign ignorance. Walk out in all his gorgeous, deceiving glory, and your disgust towards all of this will gnaw away at you until nothing’s left of you.
Jungkook will continue his act, and you’ll smoulder inside, just as you predicted.
But maybe you’re thinking too much. Maybe he’ll say that he was looking for someone, and found that someone ideal in you. Maybe you’re concluding the worst, being dramatic.
But for now, he says none of these things.
In truth, what they talk about next is worse.
“Uncle, is there anything else you need from me?” Jungkook speaks up; sounds tired all of a sudden.
That’s what you thought. The voice haunted the little girl that you used to be for nights, so it’s a given that you’d know it from somewhere, right? A frowning face levitating over a kid’s head.
You suppose you weren’t the only child fearing his presence. There was someone who was surrounded by it all the time, fearful and quiet.
Hesitation. Then, “How are you faring with the girl?”
Another beat passes, and your heartbeat halts, stuck in your throat. Optimistic.
He answers, “She is kind. I like her.”
A sliver of dull hope sparks, though you’re still barely done processing the aforementioned information. But maybe… maybe you can talk things out—
“Enough to swoon her, I assume.”
No… You can’t comprehend what his uncle’s deal is. Perhaps he’s aware of you lingering outside; or maybe he’s truly venomous enough to bring up ideas that shatter you.
But his nephew isn’t better, is he?
No.
“Yes,” Jungkook says, firmly, “I think so.”
“Good. Makes things easier.”
“Yes…”
“I told you it wouldn’t be too difficult,” his uncle says nearly cheerfully, as if he’s celebrating a long-awaited victory, “I know we failed with the older sister, but I do think you have the younger one wrapped around your finger. What was her name again?”
Like you’re a toy to beat up. To control and play with, like you don’t possess a bleeding, beating heart.
Or even a name.
Like you’re one in the faceless crowd.
Jungkook doesn’t respond, and the Duke claims, “It doesn't matter anyway, right? I told you it’s easier to proceed when—”
“—you make a woman fall in love with you. I know,” Jungkook finishes like a mantra, like something that has been preached to him on the daily, “takes no time for—”
“For a man like you.”
You remain without reaction, nearly numb to their words. Your eyes focus on a spot on the floor, unmoving; your body doesn’t want to budge.
“But I’ll take my time,” Jungkook argues, “I won’t propose right away. And I don’t understand why you want me gone so fast.”
“You do know. Jungkook, you’re a menace to our name.”
You take a deep breath. If Jungkook would just defy his uncle’s suggestions… if he didn’t play along…
He’s suffering under his tyranny, right? Perhaps that’s the only excuse you’ll allow; that he’s locked in a steel cage, unable to escape.
But it doesn’t hurt less. Because it means that anything he said, all the touches you shared were meaningless, a product of desire but nothing behind it.
Right?
“Every adult and child knows of your reputation, and I cannot fix it anymore,” the older man scolds, “Keep doing it, and even your brother, my heir, will lose everyone’s respect.”
Perhaps that’s where Jungkook’s patience ends, because he snarls, “Remember that he was already the heir when father died. You were nothing back then.”
“Careful. You were children, and your mother could do nothing for you, so be grateful th—”
That’s it.
You can’t take more than this; can’t freeze yourself against the wall, become one with it, numb all your senses and emotions.
So when you step away, breaking the dam holding back the overwhelming misery that treachery called forth, one single tear rolls down your cheek.
You’re embarrassed; hopelessly drowning in mortification.
You rush through the hallway in a blur, and stop at the railing of the staircase, catching your breath. When was the last time you had a sip of water? You don’t remember.
But the room is spinning.
You were too drunk on him, and he pulled you back into the agonising reality. You inhale the sob, fingers shaking when you lift them from your dress.
You’re so stupid.
Such an idiot to trust him.
That’s what your guts meant. What Byun meant.
And you let doe eyes play with you.
Perhaps it’s not the worst thing that he treated you like a lifeless body. You were used to it; you knew what he thought of you; understood that he didn’t have a shred of respect for you.
What you hate is that he pretended to change that opinion. That he pushed you into this fog of illusion, and double-crossed you as if it meant nothing.
And what if you’d fallen for him deeper? If you’d actually agreed to the betrothal? Would he have told you about his secrets or continued his act until the end of your lives?
It takes time until your chest stops aching; you wonder whether he’s still in that room, saying something worse that you didn’t hear anymore. But if he’s not… you should probably leave, right?
You can’t explain a fallen face just yet.
And you won’t lose yourself because of a man, will you? You shouldn’t dwell in pain, no matter how much it constricts your chest and squeezes your heart.
Your mother always said you’re only true to your feelings when you allow yourself to cry. That hurting is part of life, and that you will one day hurt, too.
But.
She didn’t tell you just how bad it could be.
You give your aching eyelids a rub. Then, you muster strength, once again flattening the fabric of your dress. You wear a neutral expression, tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear. Wipe at your cheek, fan air into your face.
You straighten your stance, and finally walk down the main hall and out the mansion.
People don’t regard you as much anymore as they did before — fortunately, though you already had an excuse or two at hand, should they ask for Jungkook.
I just needed a fresh breath of air. He surely must be inside somewhere.
The guests lingering outside seem to be having more fun than the ones inside. The atmosphere and weather are pleasant, ideal to get drunk on alcohol, laughter and joy.
You wonder if you can catch a carriage somewhere. Maybe there’s one to spare; usually, there is, in case of an emergency, right?
Because you won’t ride back home with Jungkook. Can’t think back to his lips on your neck, his fingers on you, eyes drowning in yours.
No…
You walk towards the entrance door, calling for someone, asking whether anyone’s available. You barely hear your own calls, working on reflex, tired out and desperate.
When your search seems fruitless, you walk back to the guests roaming around. You could ask one of the guests whether you could hitchhike. But then again, that would evoke questions, and you don’t think anyone here lives near your place.
And it seems that you took too much time just wandering around.
Because a moment later, Jungkook, wearing his usual smile on his striking face, is walking towards you. He calls your name, and you sigh deeply, hearing him question, “I was looking for you everywhere. Where did you go?”
Where were you supposed to go?
You weren’t leaving. It was him who suddenly disappeared.
“Just… here,” you tell him.”
“People saw you walking towards the carriages.” He nods to the exit, shifting his balance to the other leg. “Are you leaving?”
“No.” You gulp. “I mean. Yes, I was going to, but. I don’t have a carriage to bring me home.”
“...You didn’t tell me you wanted to go home.”
“I couldn’t find you, and didn’t want to burden you,” you lie; you’re not sure why you’re fabricating whatever truth. Maybe because you’re exhausted. “I’m not feeling well… But I can’t leave anyway.”
You look around, goosebumps on your skin. Less because of the breeze, more because it carries his scent to you.
Determined to avert his worried eyes, you watch the leaves of the trees oscillate. The cloudless sky allows a direct view to the crescent moon. Around it, a thousand and millions of stars paint the darkness, some brighter than the others.
There’s calmness in that picture, up above in heaven; but no tranquillity here on the ground.
Hell truly is empty.
“Did I do something wrong?” Jungkook suddenly asks.
You look at him; perhaps you’re easy to read, though you always deemed yourself inscrutable. You furrow your eyebrow innocently, shaking your head slowly to hide the true answer:
Yes. Unfortunately, stupidly, yes.
But you were worse.
Trusted just his words, laid your heart open to him, diving deep without asking for proper redemption of him. Just his damn words… his ask for another chance…
“No,” you speak instead. “No, I think it’s the corset. It’s too tight all of a sudden, and I am also starting to get a headache from the orchestra and the heat and…”
“I can help you with your corset,” he offers, shifting closer. You step back; his movements freeze. And just to pacify him a little, you move back to the prior spot again. He tries, “Should I get you something to dr—”
“No. I’ll try and rest somewhere.”
“I… take my carriage then.”
His suggestion is firm. You think he doesn’t quite believe you yet, but he doesn’t insist on an explanation either.
Of course not.
Because he doesn’t care enough.
His finger points in a general direction, and he adds, “I could pester my cousins until they permit me to ride along. You could have one of their chaperones—”
You shake your head. “It’s not very late. Barely nine, yes? I can take another carriage.”
“Which one?” he asks, gesturing around with an open palm. “There’s none left for you… so it’s alright. Go ahead.”
Guilt burns in your veins when you look into these wide eyes of his. Like a kitten.
He sounds resolute; you don’t think you will win this fight against him.
An inside voice chuckles when your knees threaten to buckle — after everything you’ve heard, you still think that deep down, he cares. That despite his battle plan, you took over at least a tiny spot in his heart; somewhere in the back, hidden but there.
But… you need to keep your armour intact.
“Are you well?” he asks.
Amidst the darkness spreading in your mind, you lift one side of your lips to a gentle smile, folding your hands as you say, “I will be.”
And as though he has read the contents of your heart, he puts a finger on your chin, lifting your face to study your expression. Of course he is — perhaps he remembers the hidden conversation just as well as you.
Maybe, looking into the depths of his cold, pumping organ, he’s good enough to overthink his wrongdoings, too.
Because he leans into you, and mumbles, “I am sorry if I hurt you anyhow.”
A tight knot appears in the pit of your stomach. “What…?”
“In that room,” he answers, and you sigh a breath of relief. No confrontation. No pain. Not yet. “I tried to be gentle.”
But not with your heart.
“You were gentle,” you assure, “I am fine.”
Such a vast number of people are gathered around you, and despite the nature of the moment, you still can’t seem to register anyone but him. You’re stupid. Truly stupid.
Jungkook nods, and brings you to the carriage silently. You climb in with your hand in his, and once you’re settled in your seat, he lets go; instead, immediately stepping up to you. Hiding you from everyone’s sight, here in the shade of the carriage where the moon doesn’t reach.
He doesn’t waste any time: grips your face, his thumb soft on your cheek. It’s a sudden movement, half scaring you, half intriguing you. Your breath hitches once more, your chest heaving.
When he looks at you without a single word, you think you’re panting.
He might be taking your reaction as a sign of affection. As he did on your way to this place, or in the room upstairs.
But in truth, his touch stings, akin to a thousand tiny needles pricking your flesh.
Flushed, lavish lips brush the tip of your nose when he leans in. You don’t hesitate or reject, because your own lips won’t push out and reveal your feelings yet. You have barely understood them yourself.
But what they will do is whisper his name one last time.
“Jungkook…”
“I… I hope to see you again soon.”
You smile.
What your lips will do is let him pull you in and kiss you. Will move against his. Will drown in the deep tenderness of his touch, no matter how much it hurts. Will permit him to slide his tongue through, dancing with yours.
When he’s done playing with you, and you’re done letting him, he pecks the apple of your cheek once more, and then mutters, “Good night, princess.”
He steps out. Waves you goodbye.
When the carriage finally leaves, your lips still stay sealed.
And you think another thing they do is… finally tremble.
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thoughts? questions? theories? anger, sadness, love? what do we think, how do we feel?
ahhh seriously, i’ve never written something like this before, so it was a really fun yet scary experience. i’m very sorry if it’s not as good as expected; the next part will be better, i promise, but i worked very hard on this, too !! :D
whether you’re an old or new reader of mine, or leave short or long feedback, i absolutely love talking to you all. since support genuinely goes a super long way, please please like, reblog (!!), and talk to me in any way, like through comments; or better yet, as i always say come yell at/with, spam meeee <33
4K notes · View notes
httpknjoon · 1 month
Text
surprise, surprise | jjk
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plot | When you asked what your boyfriend wants for Valentine's, Jungkook challenged you to surprise him. But when you did, he wasn't the only one surprised.
words | 2.1k+
genres | fluff,  secret relationship au, established relationship au, friends to lovers au
pairing | jungkook x reader
warnings | none
note | another part will follow :)) enjoy reading!
main masterlist  |  drabble series masterlist
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It was a late afternoon, during a warm sunny day, you and your boyfriend finally went on with your picnic plans after weeks of talking about it. Under a lush shade tree, Jungkook laid out your classic red gingham picnic blanket. He also has pillows from his place, knowing that you would love to have one while chilling. On the flip side, you brought out the food from your basket which includes various colorful sliced fruits, sandwiches, chips, orange juice, and a bottle of chocolate syrup if ever your boyfriend wants to put it on his fruit.
It has been past an hour since you arrived at this spot in the park, half an hour away from the city you and Jungkook live in. So, with no worries about seeing your friends around, you two were free to basically do whatever you wanted on the grass. Jungkook brought his digital camera and you were already sure that half of the photos he took today are Bam’s. You were just giggling when you saw Jungkook trying to make your pet stand still with his green toy ball and sounds he learned from The Dogist, a dog photographer who posts every dog he meets online.
“One more, Bam. Stay…” he commanded as he closed his left eye to focus on his camera’s viewfinder. 
Your pet, eager to have a treat and his toy, heeded. Followed by a shutter sound, you hear a satisfied chuckle from your boyfriend. He handed Bam a treat and then threw the ball for your pet to run after.
“How was it?” you asked, sipping on your glass of orange juice.
Jungkook turned around in your direction and instead of answering immediately, you found him staring at you. Used to him dazing out sometimes, you just smiled and took another gulp from your glass. Jungkook took this opportunity to point his camera lens to you. He moved around, finding the best angle where the light makes you glow from your greenery background. You were an angel before his sight. He clicks for your candid shot. When you hear the first shutter sound, you realize what he is doing.
“Wait! Take another one.”
This time, you smiled for the camera, making him smile behind the lens. After a couple more shots, he sat next to you to show you the results. By the small sound of awe you made, he knew you loved them.
“You’re such a great photographer, babe,” you told him.
“I just have a very beautiful muse,” he replied.
You looked up at him and he laughed when he saw your eyebrows scrunching together. Perhaps it was too corny and sweet. But your scrunched expression softened up before giving him a peck on his lips. He was about to lean in for more but you pulled away with a smile.
“You used to get girls with those lines?” you teased and laughed.
And before Jungkook can defend his game, Bam runs back with his toy in between his teeth. Half an hour passed, and the camera was now in your hands while Jungkook lay his head on your lap, scrolling through his phone. Bam is napping on the grass beside you two, tired from playing. The weather was not too hot since there was still wind blowing from time to time, perfect for a midday nap. With no more energy to take pictures, you settled his camera down. For the next few minutes, you spent the time running your fingers on Jungkook’s hair and appreciating the peace of the place. You can feel your heart feeling at ease.
“I can’t believe we’re already in the second month of this year,” your boyfriend suddenly spoke, eyes still glued on his phone.
“I know, babe. It seemed like yesterday when we celebrated New Year’s Eve at Dara’s and our anniversary,” you replied. “Then, we told Blaire about us.”
He put down his phone with that, looking at you, “We didn’t tell her, you did.”
You just rolled your eyes since you know you cannot really defend yourself. You were too drunk that night, Jungkook had to tell you what you shared with your friend the morning after. And after a whole-day conversation with Blaire, she agreed to not say anything about it and simply called you two “sneaky rats” in a teasing way.
“Anyway, Valentine’s Day is next week.” Jungkook brought up the topic, sitting up. “Do you want to do anything or go anywhere?”
“Well… we already did this picnic.” you clicked your tongue as your eyes traveled away, thinking. 
And after a few seconds, an idea pops into your head. An activity you saw online that you found cute and perfect for you two. You beamed as you told him about it. Jungkook nodded as he listened intently, eyes traveling down his tattooed knuckles.
“I love that, we can do that! That’s wonderful, princess.” He smiled, eyes crinkling. “Do you already have any ideas about the design?”
You shook your head, “Oh, not yet.”
“Okay, okay.” he nods again,
You squeeze his hands, “How about you? What do you want to do?”
He looked up at the leaves on the tree as he sighed, “I don’t know… Really. That’s why I asked you. What you want is what really matters to me.”
You raised an eyebrow, “Really? Nothing?”
He nodded his head but not a second after, he spoke again, “Okay, I have an idea.”
“Okay, spill.” 
“Surprise me,” he said like it was a challenge.
“Surprise you?” you repeated.
Looking back at your relationship, you were a little weak at doing surprises. You cannot really lie well and always see his reaction when you get him something meant for a surprise. But maybe you can try again.
“Okay, babe.”
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“Isn’t this sad?” Wooshik sighed in between the film playing on the television. “It’s the day before Valentine’s. We are both single straight guys, watching Meryl Streep boss around people because we don’t have any plans tomorrow,” he added.
I do, Jungkook said in his head. Today is the thirteenth. It has been days since you two went on that picnic and he has been secretly waiting for your surprise. You didn’t want to give him a spoiler about it since you both know how bad you are at lying. So, you didn’t give him even a single clue.
And since it’s the day before that day, you and the girls in your friend group went out for your Galentine’s Day. You told him your activities for the day, which included going to a baking class and pampering yourselves in hair and nail salons. So, in return, he and Wooshik are pretty much shooed away when the latter begs to come with them.
“It’s for girls only! Go hang out together,” Jenny laughed. 
So, they did. Initially, they planned on playing video games in Jungkook’s place. But after two hours of playing and having succeeding losses, they got exhausted and opted to watch a movie. The streaming service recommended a lot of chick-flicks so that’s what they settled for.
“This is fine. The girls are single too. A lot of people are spending tomorrow single.” he noted, focused on the film.
But Wooshik exclaimed, “But love is in the air! I don’t want to be lonely. Maybe we should pull up at a bar or something. Maybe we can have dates tomorrow.”
“I told you, I’m not into those things anymore.”
“Those things?! It’s called dating, JK. So you’re not into dating now?” Wooshik asked his tone in disbelief. Jungkook just laughed at his dramatic reaction. His friend continued, “What happened to my friend who used to introduce me to his new girlfriend every two weeks?”
Jungkook tossed him a pillow, smacking it right to his face, “Hey, people change!”
“You used to hold the record for most partners in a year in our friend group, JK.” Wooshik snickered.
“And now, I don’t. I’m happy where I am right now.” 
“Blablabla. That’s something a person with a great high-paying job or a nice love life would say. And I don’t think your job pays you that high for you to say that.” Wooshik quipped while watching the movie again.
Jungkook laughs. He’s right. But Wooshik is not aware of how fun he is having with you. Your friend doesn’t know how much you made his life more than nice. You made his days a lot more warmer and brighter than it has ever been.
“And the girls are not really single. Jenny said she will be busy tomorrow–”
“She is. She works as a head chef in a restaurant. Tomorrow is like a festival in her workplace.” Jungkook cuts him off. 
His friend snickered, “Okay, but she’s going on an occasional date with that same guy she met at a food convention. Blaire is having an on and off and on relationship with Grace. Dara is dating–”
“She is?” Jungkook asked.
Wooshik nods like it’s something he has known for a long time, “Yeah… and YN, I just know that one is seeing someone.”
Something in his stomach dropped when Jungkook heard that, “Yeah?”
“Remember when I stayed for like a week in her house when I had something renovated in my place? I swore I saw her sneaking out a guy one early morning.” his friend shared, clueless about the guy who was now sitting in front of him.
“Are you sure?” Jungkook asked.
“Yeah, I just didn’t see him properly since the lights were off. But I heard YN talking to him.” 
Yeah, it’s him. 
Not wanting to talk about it anymore, Jungkook said, “You know what? Maybe we should go out.”
It’s like Wooshik’s ears perked up when heard that, “Where?”
“Just out. Maybe get something to eat or… I saw this new bowling alley opening up around the corner. We can walk there from here.”
Originally, Jungkook wanted to take you there first. But with his best friend being bored and talking about you and your relationship, he just thought of going to that place.
“Oh, okay. Maybe fate can find me a date there.”
Jungkook chuckled, getting up, “Okay, I’ll just take a quick shower. Then, we can go.”
Wooshik nodded and Jungkook walked away. Left alone in the living room, Wooshik reached for the almost-finished bowl of chips on the center table. He rarely watched chick flicks but he really liked this one. Maybe because of the lead actress. But nonetheless, he enjoys the story.
“I just don’t get why she has to leave her great job for Nate. I mean, he did not even support her when she was having growth in her work and she was in Paris!” Wooshik exclaimed as the screen showed Anne Hathaway walking away from her boss, portrayed by Meryl Streep.
The credits were rolling in when he heard the knock on the door. He was about to call his friend when he heard the distant trickling from his shower. Wooshik got up and opened the door, dusting off the cheese powder from the chips. A delivery guy stood in front of the door, holding a box of pretty flower arrangements.
“Delivery for Jeon Jungkook.” the guy said.
Confused, Wooshik had his mouth slightly open before answering, “Oh… uh, he’s in the shower. But I can receive this for him.”
“Okay. Please, sign here.”
The guy handed him a paper and Wooshik followed. After the flowers were handed to him, he said thank you and closed the door. His eyes scanned the whole arrangement filled with various flowers. A white folded card sat on top of it. As he carefully placed it down on the table, one question stayed in his head.
Who the hell would send flowers to his best friend?
So just like what any nosy, curious person would do, Wooshik flicked the card open.
Blooms for the best person I know. 
I was with B in the flower shop and he helped me pick the flowers. I hope you’ll love them.
Know that this is the first of other surprises I’ve planned for tomorrow ;)
But firstly, let me ask you for the first time,
Babe, will you be my Valentine?
-Princess
Princess? Who the hell is Princess? Who is B? Is B a person? Did his friend have a baby and didn’t know it?
“Hey, let’s g– Oh, where did that come from?”
Jungkook came in, hair damp. His eyes land on the bouquet of flowers. Wooshik is frozen in place. His hand is still holding the card as he stares at him.
His eyes gradually squinted, “Who is Princess, and why is she sending you flowers?”
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TAGLIST (closed)
@hobiuwusunshine @alinerl @bbangtanlove95 @daydreamiies @craftymoonchaos @awseokjin @yoonabeo @luvrsofbts @hisbutton-nose @bloopkook @chvngbiin @takochelle @wildarmy @cuddlysoftbear @luv-minhyun-world @shydestinyyouth @bbtsficrecs @fan-ati--c @rjsmochii @jkbabiey @hopeworldjimin @chieftoadturkeynickel @ppeachyttae @tannies-luv @loomipee @sanctify-mp3 @stuffy16 @laylasbunbunny @di0rgguk @tswisal1 @amara-mars @jksgirlhere @callmejimmeo @rapmonie2047 @petalsofink @daemontargaryenwhore @juju-227592
597 notes · View notes
ahundredtimesover · 3 months
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I Want You to Stay (01) | JJK
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Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags: boss!JK x assistant!reader; idiot strangers to lovers; slow slow burn; k-drama feels; angst, drama, fluff, smut
Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, unhealthy coping mechanisms; family drama; minor injuries; power dynamics (JK starts off as a jerk); work-related anxiety, feelings of helplessness, insecurities; childhood traumatic experiences, nightmares; sexual harassment, prior incidence of domestic violence (PLS PLS BE CAREFUL WHEN READING); arts and business/property devt talk that’s probably inaccurate; commitment issues & emotionally constipated characters; cold and detached JK; explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter) (18+)
Chapter Word count: 12k
Series Masterlist
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Status: Ongoing
Series summary: Working for Jungkook isn’t the same as working for Hoseok. For starters, Jungkook doesn’t smile, he doesn’t appreciate you, and he gives you too much work. It doesn’t help that he’s incredibly handsome and has women at his beck and call. But as the tension grows, it becomes impossible to resist him. You’ve dedicated yourself to your job for 8 years so when you finally decide to put yourself first, he asks you to reconsider. And while you know that leaving is difficult, you learn that when it comes to Jungkook, staying is always so much harder.
Playlist 🎶: on the way home
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A/N: Happy 2024, everyone! 🎉 Dropping this tonight as a welcome to the new year and the start of the wild journey that is this story. It's a different JK that I'm used to writing. It's also a different arrangement for me as the story is still being written, so just a heads up that updates won't be as regular compared to before, but they'll definitely come (pls don't come at me hehe 😁)! This is also a painfully slow build-up with lots of details and office talk so please be patient! I don’t know how this will turn out and be revived but I hope you enjoy! 💕
Also my biggest thanks to @wonwoonlight as always 🥰
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Jung Hoseok’s smile is like a ray of sunshine - warm on cool mornings, radiant on sunny afternoons. It’s light and infectious, but more than anything, it’s genuine. There’s comfort in the way his entire face beams and how the rest of his body follows; there’s this sense of openness that makes it easy to be around him, that makes it easy to work for him.
It was 10 years ago when you first encountered that smile - bright and encouraging as he welcomed you and the rest of the interns to his family’s company. It slowly dissolved the anxiety you were feeling over being 1 of 12 chosen students to work for one of the leading real estate and property development corporations in the country. You’d see it again two years later as an employee, and you recall how he perked up at the sight of you, having remembered those eight weeks you spent preparing the conference room for their meetings and serving the executives their coffee. 
You wouldn’t have expected that five years after that, you’d be seeing that smile everyday as his executive assistant, and it was one of the things that made the job bearable. Despite the long hours and the amount of work you had to do and events you had to accompany him to, working for Hoseok always felt worth it. Despite the insane amount of pressure he was put under and the stress he had to endure, Hoseok somehow always managed to smile. 
He was serious when he had to be, but there was joy in how he did things. He allowed himself moments of calm, of time to check in on his support team for a few laughs. He’d spare himself a few minutes a day to sway to the soft music he plays in his office, he’d preside over meetings with vigor, and he’d start and end every interaction with anyone with that smile - the same smile that assures you that all your hard work is appreciated and which encourages you to keep learning.
It’s that same smile that he has on right now, as he hands you a custom-made cake with ‘you worked hard’ written on it. He says the words as your eyes turn to him in surprise. 
“Thank you for all that you’ve done,” Hoseok says. “I know you were new to the role just like I was but you made everything so easy for me. I’m gonna have to get used to being without your brilliance, Ms. Cho. I hope you never doubt yourself ever again.”
Your astonished face turns into a pout, as it dawns on you that it’s Friday, the first unofficial day of you no longer being Hoseok’s executive assistant, given his appointment as President not long ago. Yet despite the big change he’ll be experiencing starting next week, he’s the one affirming and comforting you, something that’s rare for someone of his stature and something you’ll definitely miss. 
“You know I don’t cry, but I just might,” you respond, earning you a chuckle. “But really, I… I can’t thank you enough for taking a chance on me. I know my credentials weren’t like the others but—”
“Ms. Cho,” he interjects. “The only credentials those other applicants had were the universities they went to, but none of them matched your level of skill and dedication to the role. I can assure you that none of them would’ve managed the past three years like you did. I should be thanking you for dealing with all the craziness with me.”
“You’re a good boss, it’s that simple,” you return the compliment now. “You were patient with me and challenged me to be better without putting me down. That does a lot for a person’s confidence, you know?”
“I know that now,” he smiles again. “But really, I don’t think I could’ve asked for a more competent right-hand woman. Jungkook’s lucky he’s taking my position with the most capable assistant to help him out.”
At the mention of the man’s name, your face sours, something that Hoseok picks up, earning you another laugh. 
“Not a fan of him, I see,” he eyes you curiously.
“I don’t mean any disrespect, Mr. Jung, but your cousin is not you,” you explain. “I may have only seen him a handful of times but those are enough to let me know that he does not smile.”
“Yes, I do confirm that,” Hoseok chuckles. “Jungkook’s quite the perfectionist and very much a workaholic. But he’s brilliant and creative and you’ll learn a lot from him, too. He’s being primed to co-lead the company with me and he needs a strong support for that and I think that’s you. His father thinks that’s you, and for the CEO to think so means a lot, ___. Uncle has seen how you work and was adamant that you remain in this role, especially with his son assuming the Vice President position.”
You know that Hoseok means to reassure you, but you suppose your insecurities over having this role and even being in this company won’t ever really go away. You didn’t graduate from a prestigious university in Seoul like most employees here did, and in this society, that usually means everything. You’re thankful for the trust that you’ve been given and you agree that you worked hard for it, too, but it will always be overwhelming; even then, it sometimes still feels undeserved. 
At your silence, Hoseok speaks again. “___, as your former boss and as your friend, I’m here to back you up. Jungkook’s family but if he, for some reason, acts like a hard-headed jerk, you let me know, okay?”
He turns serious now, as he silently asks for you to promise him that you’ll speak out if you need to. Hoseok knows what you went through under Mrs. Byun, the former manager who abused her power over you until her own slip-up caused her downfall years later, and he doesn’t want you to go through that again. 
“Okay. But I didn’t mean to imply that he’s a jerk just because he doesn’t smile,” you clarify. “I guess I meant to say that… I’ll miss working for you. That’s all. We somehow always got a laugh in, no matter how stressful things were. I’ll miss being with A-yeong, too.”
“I know you also meant to say that I’m the best boss you’ve ever had,” Hoseok chuckles, though you don’t miss the sadness in his eyes, too. “But I’ll just be two floors above you. You’ll still see me everywhere. And A-yeong’s gonna miss you, too, that’s why she can’t let you go without having dinner out, that I’m apparently not invited to.”
“We’re just gonna gossip about you, don’t worry,” you tease, appreciative of the fact that his wife has been kind to you all these years, apologizing to you on his behalf during the rare times he’s cranky, and gifting you little things from their trips abroad. “But thank you again, Hoseok,” you continue, dropping the formalities when you mean to speak to him as a friend, because that’s what he is, and it’s a rarity in this industry where those in power tend to take advantage of those below them. “You’ve treated me well, and I’ll never forget that.” 
“Thank you, ___,” he smiles once more. “I’ll finish setting up my new office now. I’ll see you there in 30 minutes, okay? I know Jungkook officially starts on Monday but he wanted to get all the administrative stuff out of the way as soon as possible and since my old room is being sanitized, he’ll be staying at mine the whole morning. HR has everything he needs to sign so please get those documents from them before heading to my office.”
“Oh, so he’s coming today?” You ask, unable to hide the mix of surprise and disappointment in your voice. You’re clearly uninformed about this. “Didn’t he just arrive last night?”
“Yes, he did. I thought he’d at least spend today resting but no, he called me an hour ago to say he’ll drop by this morning so he can get straight to business on his first day,” Hoseok explains, shaking his head at the thought of his cousin wanting to get straight to work. “I know it’s short notice so you don’t need to brief him or anything yet. You’ve been buried in organizing all my files this past week after all.” 
“Okay, but I’ve got everything organized for him already anyway in case he wants to start,” you say, having prepared all the documents he’d need to ease into his role more smoothly, knowing it’s your job to help him with that. 
“Of course you have,” Hoseok chuckles, impressed as always with how on top you are of everything. “I’ll see you in half an hour.”
You sulk in your seat once he’s out of view, whining internally because much as your files are ready for your new boss, you’re the one who isn’t. You’d held off on mentally preparing yourself for meeting the Jeon Jungkook, second son of the current CEO of Jeon Corporation and the new Vice President, thinking you’d have the entire weekend for that, so you’re caught off guard at having to face him today. It’s one thing to move on from no longer having Jung Hoseok as your boss - that itself took you months to process and accept; it’s another to have to get used to assisting someone else, someone you know is completely different in attitude and approach to his work.
Jungkook used to be an executive in the Singapore office, the Southeast Asian headquarters of the company. In your three years as Hoseok’s assistant, you’d only seen Jungkook a few times, such as when he’d fly to Seoul for an official visit or a family gathering but you never interacted, as you didn’t really have a reason to, especially since you were always busy with making sure the event was running smoothly. 
But you’d definitely noticed him, partly because the female staff always talked about him when he was around, and partly because next to his parents and his cousins, who are all personable in their own ways, Jungkook sticks out like a sore thumb. You’re not exaggerating when you say that you’ve never seen him smile - not for the pictures and not when he’s talking to the other executives and employees, a contrast to his father’s infectious charm and his mother’s youthful energy.
You’ve gotten used to Hoseok’s passion balanced with his thoughtfulness and joy - you always enjoyed the videos that A-yeong would show you of their weekends doing ballroom dancing because it’s what he loved to do with her. You’re unsure how you’ll manage assisting someone who’s the complete opposite. You’ve heard of Jungkook’s abilities though; his father always spoke of them with pride. Creative and innovative, he’d say of his son, but he always lived in his head, too, and perhaps that’s why even if he can socialize with others, he prefers not to, given that you’d always seen him at the bar after said events, drinking on his own.
You didn’t think those times that you’d one day be having him as your boss. You didn’t expect the appointments to come this soon, nor did you expect to still be in the company by the time they happened. But here you are, about to meet him and hoping to the heavens that whatever preconceived notions you have of him based on what very little you know would be proven wrong. 
Wanting to calm yourself down before meeting him, you head to the management support team’s office for a cup of tea in the pantry, but you’re stopped by Do-hyun, one of the project assistants. 
She hugs you like she always does, even if you rarely ever return it, and she whines like you expect her to, given her unusually pouty face. 
“It’s only been an hour but I already miss Mr. Jung,” she laments. “Why did they appoint him as President so soon? They could’ve waited for another year or so, or at least let him take us with him!”
You find yourself being the reasonable one this time, as you pull her away from you so you could talk to her properly. 
“We always knew he was going to be President, Do-hyun. But then the Board decided to make Ji-woo head of the Singapore office after their uncle stepped down, and that meant Hoseok had to take his sister’s place,” you explain, knowing how generational corporations like this work, with family members rotating in the executive positions. “And much as he’d like to take us with him, the position already comes with its own team. He’s just two floors above us, though. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if we popped in every once in a while to say hi.”
“No, I’m bitter,” she pouts again, earning her a laugh from you.
“Well, at least the new Vice President isn’t a stranger,” Manager Lee chimes in. 
“I heard the CEO’s son doesn’t smile,” Do-hyun counters. “How do we go from assisting someone who literally gives all of us the energy to work each day, to someone who doesn’t think there’s anything worth being happy about? I also heard he’s a workaholic, so what if he demands that we can’t leave the office until he does? And that he’s kind of a fuck boy, so what if he has a scandal that we have to—” 
“Yah! Those are just hearsay, and we don’t listen to those,” you warn her, not wanting the team to start on a bad note because of some rumors about your new boss that may or may not be true. 
And if those are, it’s your job to make sure that those are handled properly and that there’s no friction between the management support team and the Vice President. The thought suddenly hits you and you feel nauseous. You’ve never had these worries with Hoseok because he always prioritized the team - he made sure that tasks were properly delegated, that you all took your well-deserved break, that you weren’t burnt out, that you all knew he got your back the way you all got his. 
But then again, it’s natural to be anxious about change, especially when what you had was already the best it could’ve been. And much as you were the one worrying about this earlier, you’re now the one who has to reassure the team, especially the younger members, that things are going to be okay. 
“You’ll meet him soon, and I’ll make sure he’s properly oriented with everything before he sits down with you all,” you say. “Let’s just be optimistic about this, okay? Manager Lee has been here a while and he can guide all of us when it comes to adapting to changes like this.”
The rest of the team nods, voicing their agreement about being open and welcoming to your new boss. 
“Okay, good. Now let me get my tea before I combust,” you chuckle, heading towards the adjacent room. 
You’re busy taking breaths in between sips of your hot drink when you see a familiar face in the room through the glass window, prompting you to head back outside.
“Mr. Ri,” you greet, causing the man before you to turn towards you. “What are you doing here? Does Mr. Jeon need anything?” 
Knowing you’re referring to the elder Jeon, Mr. Ri shakes his head. 
“I’m here as Jungkook’s chauffeur and bodyguard, actually. His father appointed me, wanting people he trusts to help his son,” he clarifies. “I’ve just driven him from his penthouse.”
“Oh,” you say, unable to control the way your face falls a little. “So, he’s here.”
“He is. He said he wanted to get things done today so he doesn’t waste his time when he starts next week. He’s at Hoseok’s office right now. I believe he’s supposed to sign some documents?”
“Oh shit,” you blurt out, immediately setting down your half-finished tea and rushing out the door to speed-walk to your desk, ignoring Mr. Ri’s demand for you to slow down. 
With what little you know of your new boss, he seems like the type to not excuse tardiness, so you take your files, head to HR to retrieve some documents, and then proceed to Hoseok’s office. You try to catch your breath as you head towards the door, which opens before you get to knock, revealing Bitna, the President’s assistant, who greets you with a sweet smile. 
“Hi, ___. I was just about to call you,” she says. “CEO Jeon is inside as well. Just walk in, they’re waiting for you.”
You cross the small hallway as the door gently closes, and you stop in your tracks the moment you hear Jungkook’s voice.
“I still prefer my old assistant,” he says, obviously displeased. “He was very organized, highly educated, and well-traveled. While this Ms. Cho didn’t even study in a top university in Seoul. And Hoseok says she doesn’t know any other foreign languages when that’s one of my requirements.”
“Son, you’re being too harsh,” CEO Jeon chides. “Ms. Cho is a top performing employee, very hardworking and dedicated. She’s worked here for eight years and she imbibes all our values; she knows the company culture and knows the ins and outs of things with how she’s been exposed to them. Ask your cousin; Hoseok speaks highly of her.”
“___ is great, Kook. She’s incredibly organized and highly analytical and observant. She doesn’t need a Seoul education to be good at what we need her to be good at,” Hoseok argues. 
“I still want my old assistant. It’s more convenient that way. Lucas already knows how I work and what I require of him,” Jungkook insists. “I’m just saying that I need things to be efficient and she and I can’t be adjusting to each other when there are multiple projects that I’d much rather give my attention to.”
“And I’m saying that Ms. Cho probably knows more than you do when it comes to these projects,” the elder Jeon counters. “Plus, your old assistant would have to adjust to life in Seoul and that’s harder. It’s just not practical, especially since you’re due to start in a few days. You have other things to worry about. ___ is there to make your life easier. Give her that chance to do her job.”
“But I—”
“Good morning, gentlemen,” you greet, not wanting to hear whatever unfounded things that Jungkook has to say, even if you have your own preconceived notions about him which, you remind yourself, are partly founded. Barely five minutes in and you already can’t stand his judgmental and entitled ass. 
You walk towards the middle of the room where they’re congregated on the couches, with the elder Mr. Jeon and Hoseok smiling at you while Jungkook merely glances at you, his jaw clenched, perhaps irritated at the fact that you’d overheard him completely misjudge and undermine your abilities without even knowing who you are.
“Good morning, Ms. Cho,” CEO Jeon says. “I know you’ve seen him a few times but I’d like you to officially meet my son and the new Vice President, Jungkook.”
Jungkook turns to you with a disinterested look but he doesn’t meet your eyes. You bow as a sign of respect, even if it’s the last thing you think he deserves.  
“My pleasure, Mr. Jeon,” you respond. “I was told that you’d like to proceed with administrative matters this morning. I have all the documents with me and I can explain each one to you before you sign them. I’ve also consolidated all the things you need to know prior to your meetings next week,” you add, handing him an iPad. “This has the resumes of each member of your management support team, including their professional and development goals. Mine are there as well, so you can read about my credentials and achievements in this company the past eight years, which I think have tremendously helped me in performing my duties satisfactorily. There’s also a folder of team profiles of each of the departments you’re overseeing. You’ll also find closure reports of completed projects from the past five years, progress reports of ongoing projects, and approved and working proposals of upcoming ones. I’ve included summaries and key figures for each of them. You may read them prior to your meetings, and if there’s anything missing that you’d like me to include, I can have them ready by the end of the day.”
“Hmm,” Jungkook hums, as he scrolls through all the folders you’ve prepared for him.
In your periphery, you can see the other two men holding in smiles as you seemingly render the younger man speechless, but while he assesses all that you’ve provided to him, you’re given time to observe the man seated before you. Other than his slightly longer hair, not much has changed from when you saw Jungkook in last year’s gala. 
As he drags his tongue across the inside of his cheek with his scrunched eyebrows in judgment, you’re reminded that this is the first time you’ve seen him up close. And even from his angle, you can tell. 
He’s unfairly handsome. 
He’s got dark expressive eyes, soft-looking pink lips, and a sharp jawline that complement his lean figure. You understand why the staff are enamored by him even from afar and - if the rumors about him are true - why women would shoot their shot with him at clubs, in hopes they’d be the lucky one he’d choose to be with for the night.
The illusion breaks, though, as he turns to you with a hardened gaze. 
“I’m sure I’ll find something that’s missing,” he states.
“If they’re relevant and necessary, I can have the files ready by today,” you respond, knowing full well that you’ve included every possible document that would be of use to him. 
“I’ll be the judge of what’s relevant and necessary, Ms. Cho,” he counters. 
“Of course, Mr. Jeon,” you say, conceding. “Whatever it is, then I’ll make sure to have them ready for you as soon as possible.”
Jungkook hums in response, turning his attention to the HR documents this time, breezing through the text and ignoring your brief explanations of the contents before signing at the bottom of the pages. You inform him of sections he’s missed, and he groans at having been corrected but you don’t mind. He’s the one who chose to do all this now and in here, in front of his father and his cousin.
Once he’s done, he hands you the signed files and holds your gaze. “Is there anything else, Ms. Cho?”
“I suppose that is all, Mr. Jeon. Unless there are other things you want to assess, or people you want to ensure are qualified to assist you with your functions,” you say. 
Jungkook huffs in displeasure. You can sense the tension build, as irritation paints his face. It’s at that moment that his father chimes in, suggesting that you introduce him to his team.
“You can maybe also orient him on the current projects and partnerships,” the older man says. 
“That can wait. I’ve had enough of engaging for today,” Jungkook responds, his voice cold, detached. 
“In that case, let me lead you to your floor, Mr. Jeon.”
You step back and wait for him to walk ahead, before you excuse yourself from the older men. You don’t miss the sorry looks on their faces, and you give them a smile as if to say that it’s fine, that Jungkook’s someone you can handle, and his obvious displeasure towards having you as his assistant doesn’t faze you. It doesn’t change the fact that you wish he wasn’t your boss though, or at least, that he wasn’t such a jerk like what he’s being right now.
Walking behind him as you both head towards the elevator, you see the way he carries himself - hands in the pockets of his sleek black trousers, his eyes focused straight ahead, nothing like Hoseok who was always gesticulating as he spoke to you every time you walked side-by-side from one place to another.    
Jungkook stands in front of the doors, seemingly waiting for you to press the buttons and you do it before he could even express his annoyance. You stand in front this time, then make sure you hold the doors open for him to exit, and you resume your spot behind him as you walk down the hallway. 
“On the left are two small meeting rooms and one conference room,” you start, thankful that there’s not much to tour him around on this floor, given that everything is exclusive to the Vice President. “On the right is a seating room, and up ahead is an archive room. Down the—”
“I’ve been here before, Ms. Cho,” Jungkook interjects as he looks at you blankly. “This is my family’s building; I’m very much aware of how the floors look like.”
Not rattled by his disruption, you nod and smile, wanting to show him that whatever intimidation or humiliation he’s trying to make you feel isn’t gonna work on you. You know if you show any sign of frustration, that will just give him a reason to have you replaced and despite your clear dislike for the man, you need this job, especially this position that allows you to pay your rent in a safe part of town and send money to your family every month. At this point, that’s the only thing that will keep you going.
Approaching the management support office, you walk faster and make sure to enter the room before he does, signaling the team with your eyes that their new boss is coming, your silently frantic gaze telling them to be on their best behavior because their usual antics won’t work on Jungkook the way they did with Hoseok. 
Once Jungkook appears, everyone bows and greets him, and you can sense them holding their breaths as they look up, taking him all in. You see him eye each person, and you can tell he’s already assessing them individually. You take it upon yourself to introduce each one, stating their name, where they studied and what course they took, describing their primary role in the team and their specific strengths. You see him follow your words, nodding and humming as you go, and you think he’s processing the information and making sure he remembers them. 
There are no pleasantries; Jungkook just goes straight to the point. 
“I’m sure you have concerns about having a new boss and the changes that come along with it. But I’m here to tell you now that you should get over whatever those are, as I’d like the adjustment period to be as short as possible,” he starts. “My cousin is brilliant at his job and so am I, but we work very differently, so whatever you got used to doing with and for him, don’t expect the same with me. I demand excellence and efficiency from each one of you because that’s what I commit myself to and that’s the only way that this team will be able to do its job. Am I clear?”
“Yes, sir,” the team answers in unison. 
“We commit to those as well, Mr. Jeon,” Manager Lee says. “As the head of your support team, I will make sure that all our deliverables are of high quality and that things will run smoothly so that we may properly do our job of assisting you.”
“That’s good, and that’s what I expect,” Jungkook says, nodding at everyone before walking out the door to head to his office, with you trailing him from behind. 
“Is my room still being sanitized?” He turns to you. 
“Yes, sir.”
“Why did it need to be sanitized? And why today?”
“It’s protocol, sir. We also had a sendoff for Mr. Jung yesterday so the room smelled of food. And he instructed for this to be done today so that I don’t need to come here tomorrow, as he doesn’t like any of his staff working during the weekend,” you reply. “This should be finished this afternoon. I’ve also purchased the oil for your diffusers. The room will be ready for you by Monday.”
Jungkook merely hums and looks around, specifically at your designated area with your desk and shelves at the back, then takes a call before turning to you again to say that he’s heading out to meet his friends.
“Is there anything else you need, Mr. Jeon?” You ask, thankful that you don’t have to deal with him for the rest of the day.
“No.”
“Okay then, sir. I’ll meet you at your apartment at 6:30 AM on Monday. Is that time alright?”
“Sure,” he responds, then turns around and starts walking out. “Just keep your phone on. I work during the weekend.”
He’s gone before you can even respond, and you rush to the support office once you’ve heard the elevator ding that indicates that he’s gone. When you get there, you’re greeted with everyone’s frowns, with Do-hyun close to tears.
“I don’t like him, ___. He looks so unapproachable and too serious!” She complains. “I miss Mr. Jung. Is there an opening in his team? Should I just resign?”
“Aish!” You reprimand her. “Don’t speak like that. And don’t let those few minutes determine everything for you.”
“Well, those few minutes are enough to tell me that I don’t like him. No matter how good-looking he is,” Chin-sun says.
“He is, right!” Do-hyun chirps now, a complete 180 from seconds ago. “I’ve seen him around but I didn’t think he’d be even more handsome up close! It just sucks that he’s a grinch and that makes all the difference. Maybe that’s why he doesn’t have a girlfriend! He’s probably too snobby and—”
“Yah! You really need to stop it with those rumors,” you scold her this time. “That’s your boss. His personal life is none of our business. Where do you even hear these things?”
“Every washroom in this building, basically. Staff are always gossiping there, you know?” Do-hyun responds. 
“And since when do we listen to gossip,” you scowl at her. “Sure, he’s not our favorite person right now but we don’t have the right to make claims about aspects of his life. And where are people even getting those ideas!”
“People talk, I guess,” she shrugs. “And he’s often spotted in clubs with those Kim brothers so maybe they see things. I’m not saying they’re all accurate… just that rumors often have some truth to them, you know?”
“No, I don’t, and we shouldn’t be sticking our noses in places where they shouldn’t be,” you say.
“Fine, but it’s just a heads up,” Do-hyun says, turning serious now. “You’re his executive assistant, and you have no choice but to stick your nose in places because personal and professional lines are often blurred in your situation, and that’s just how our world’s set up.”
“She’s right,” Chin-sun chimes in. “I mean, you need to know his personal schedule, go to his apartment, do errands if you need to, maybe buy a box of condoms if he runs out… You just got lucky that Mr. Jung’s pretty chill and has a wife who’s even nicer than he is. Your only problem was that he was damn scared of everything that moved and wasn't human.”
You’d laugh at the last statement if you could, but you know they’re both right. Hoseok wasn’t perfect, and neither was his marriage, but it never reached a point where you had to be put in a compromising position because you were his assistant who, by nature of your work, had to be privy to some of his personal matters. The most involved you were was when he and A-yeong had an argument and they used you as their messenger, but even that was more of a miscommunication issue than anything serious. They apologized to you after and promised to never put you in that kind of situation again.
But with Jungkook as a single man, you’re unsure what personal business you’d end up being involved in. You just wish it wasn’t something that would test your principles and cause you to lose your job. Regardless, whatever that would be isn’t something you can even really talk about with others.
“Well, I don’t wanna think about any of that right now,” you sigh, knowing you’ve got enough to worry about, such as how you’re going to start surviving everyday assisting a man who clearly doesn’t want you around. 
But if he’s gonna be a hard-head about it, then you’re just going to have to match him. You got to where you are because you’re determined to prove yourself constantly, and you’ll just show him that he needs you, and he doesn’t really have a choice unless he wants to argue with his father. 
You try to encourage your team once more and give Do-hyun that rare hug in comfort before going back to your desk, intent on finishing all the presentations for your briefing with Jungkook next week. You begin setting up his room by mid-afternoon, using a photo of his Singapore office as a basis since you were told that he prefers a certain style for his furniture and decor. You’re no stylist but over an hour after you finish, you think you did pretty good. You were so into designing the space that you didn’t notice the time fly by; before you know it, it’s 6PM, because you can hear A-yeong right outside calling for you.
“Hi,” she chirps, hugging you in greeting. “Are you ready?”
“I’ll just pack my things,” you say, walking to your desk. 
A-yeong takes a peek at the room and praises your efforts. “This looks so different from how it used to be. And that’s good because those cousins have such different tastes. But I think Jungkook will like this. He’s into the masculine and moody vibe, so good job, ___.”
You know that despite her kindness, she wouldn’t lie, and you could only hope that she’s right. You think it looks nice, but it’s what he thinks that matters; you’ll just have to wait until Monday to find out. 
As you’re about to leave, Hoseok appears in the hallway and asks how you are. Your scowl pretty much gives you away.
“I’m sorry about Jungkook, ___. He’s stubborn and a hot-head sometimes but he isn’t always like that, and this isn’t me making excuses for him,” your former boss says. 
“Why, what did he do?” A-yeong asks worriedly. 
“Basically implied that I’m not qualified for this role, among other things,” you respond. “But it’s okay. Not like I haven’t heard that before.”
“And you know that’s not true,” Hoseok comforts you. “He’s not good with change, that’s all, and you know how these appointments were all pretty short notice and he’s just been frustrated ever since. But whatever it is he said, don’t take them to heart. He’ll get a word from me, and he’ll definitely get one from his father.”
You want to say that it’s not easy to just disregard what Jungkook said; he’s your boss after all, and all that matters is what he thinks about you. But you’re not one to air out these feelings to Hoseok now that you’ve experienced a bit of what it’s like, so you just shake your head and ask the older man to let it go.
“He’s probably just tired,” you make an excuse this time, not wanting to discuss further with Hoseok. “And he had that assistant for over five years. I can understand wanting that familiarity and convenience. I’m just gonna have to adjust; there are a lot of things going on right now and he’ll need to focus on the projects, not his compatibility with his assistant.”
“But that matters though,” Hoseok insists. “I got things done because we worked well together. He’s gonna have to meet you in the middle with this one. And I’ll make sure that he does.”
“I know you said you want to look out for me but I don’t think it’s a good idea if you intervene this time, Mr. Jung,” you say, letting him know you’re serious and you mean business. “I’ll be okay, don’t worry about me.”
You give him a comforting smile, and you hope it’s enough to quell Hoseok’s own worries and it works this time. He returns it before letting you and his wife go, and it’s the Thai dinner and incredible desserts that somehow make up for your not-so-great day. 
You think the weekend will give you the peace you need to face your dreaded week - you do your errands and chores on Saturday and go to the market and watch a movie by yourself in the cinema the next day. 
All it took was a text from Jungkook that Sunday evening, asking for copies of certain policies and disapproved proposals from the last five years, that just had to ruin it, as you spend the entire evening consolidating the files, making you already wish it was Friday.
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Jungkook’s apartment building is one of the Jeon properties that you haven’t been to yet, as it’s one of the newer massive residential structures that they built three years ago. You enter the sleek-looking lobby then submit your documents at the reception in exchange for your own access, and you internally marvel at how luxurious everything looks. 
You get to the 42nd floor, and it seems that there are only two units here. You walk towards the one on the right, choosing to be on the safe side by ringing the doorbell. It’s Monday, after all, and it’s your first time here; you don’t want to just enter without him permitting you to do so. 
You’re about to press the button again after a minute of no response, when the door opens and you take a moment to process the sight before you. 
There, standing just a few feet away, is Jungkook with nothing but a pair of black gym shorts on, his taut chest glistening in sweat, and his entire right arm covered in black and colored ink. His hair is damp and ruffled, and it’s probably due to the boxing he’d just done, as evidenced by the wraps on his knuckles and the way he’s panting heavily. 
You get your senses back and look away, not wanting to look affected by his half-naked form, even if you’re the one who has to catch her breath this time because much as you dislike the man, you can’t deny that his body is something that definitely deserves to be praised. 
“You’re here,” he speaks first, surprise laced in his voice as he takes in your obviously flustered form.
“I asked if 6:30 AM was a good time to come, Mr. Jeon,” you answer, glancing at him before looking at whatever you could behind him. “Perhaps I misheard your confirmation. I can wait downstairs if you’re not yet done with your exercise. My apologies for coming in early.”
You don’t actually have anything to be sorry for; he did confirm the time, and he’s the one who decided that working out at this hour was a good idea, knowing that his assistant’s scheduled to come. You would’ve appreciated it if he says you don’t need to apologize, but he doesn’t.
“It’s fine, I just finished,” he huffs. 
He leaves the door open for you to enter then heads straight to the large room on the right, which looks to be an indoor gym. You allow yourself a few seconds to look at his retreating form, quietly gasping as his broad shoulders and slender waist blind you a little, then scolding yourself for doing so. You stay rooted by the kitchen and look around the spacious penthouse as you wait for him to return. He exits the gym wearing a loose white shirt now, combing his hair with his fingers as he drinks a bottle of water.
“So, Mr. Jeon, uh, I would prepare Mr. Jung’s outfits for the week and then help his house staff make his breakfast. I run down his schedule as he eats. Are you okay with the same arrangement?” 
“Sure. I just don’t have any staff with me so you’re on your own. I’m fine with anything though. I’m not usually hungry in the morning,” he says before walking to the other side of the apartment.
You follow him, careful not to enter spaces you’re not given permission to, which is why you stand by his bedroom door before asking to come in. 
“How will you prepare my clothes from there?” He huffs. “Of course you can enter. Just be done before I finish taking a shower.”
You nod shyly and then head to the walk-in closet that thankfully has a separate door from the bathroom. He’s already unpacked his clothes, although not everything has been organized. You spot a few suits that are ready to wear, and you fix those first, taking note of asking him if there are things he wants dry cleaned or pressed. 
You leave his bedroom in time, hearing him slide open the door as you make it out, and proceed to make his breakfast. There’s really not much you can create with what little he has, so you make do with eggs and toast and whatever spread you find in his cupboard.
Jungkook walks into the kitchen not long after, the dark gray suit looking immaculate on him as you expected. Spotting his crooked necktie, you immediately walk up to him to fix it, unaware of how he holds his breath with how close you are. Noticing his body stiffen, you step back right away, apologizing for not asking permission first. 
He looks away and says it’s fine, then sits on the spot at the dining table where you’ve set up his meal. He stares at it for a good few seconds, prompting you to explain yourself.
“That’s… that’s all I could make with what you have, Mr. Jeon,” you say. “I can arrange for online groceries for you, as well as dry clean and pressing for your clothes and—”
“I’m having someone come in to clean my place and do all of that,” he says, as he takes a bite of his food. “So, what’s my week like?”
You start to enumerate the conference and lunch meetings he’ll be having this week, including who they’ll be with and their purpose. They’re mostly with the department leads to discuss updates on processes and current projects, and you’re thankful that Hoseok involved you as much as he did, given that Jungkook’s questions are more specific than you expected. 
Sure, he’s a Jeon and obviously works in the same company, but the Southeast Asian projects are different from the ones being implemented in South Korea, and while he used to oversee overall compliance to design standards, he’ll now be in-charge of setting those very standards this time. As Vice President, he’ll be involved in crafting policies; he’s also free to manage his own construction projects, and that’s what the support team is for. Given his much more expansive role this time, there are more departments and projects to oversee, and definitely more executive decisions to make. 
You suppose it’s why his questions don’t stop, even after he’s cleaned up and you both find yourselves in the backseat of the car and on the way to the office. He looks through the iPad with all the files you gave him, and you see the notes he’s made on them as you turn to him to answer his queries. Even if you know that he’s also still assessing you - perhaps on your knowledge and attention to detail - you can’t help but admire his thoroughness. You may have also cursed him in frustration for making you work on a Sunday, but he seems to have done way more than you, given that he went through all the documents over the weekend. You suddenly don’t feel too annoyed. 
But of course, he has to ruin it again.
“I need these annotated versions of the project and departmental documents ready before my meetings with the respective teams,” Jungkook says, his voice low and stern. “And I expect progress reports to be as detailed as possible, so make sure to check them first before they get to me. The ones you gave need revisions. I believe you’re trained enough to know immediately that these are lacking.”
“Yes, sir,” you respond, noting his instructions on your notebook while internally yelling, given that you’re unsure of the need for them before the meetings. 
Surely, he could give you some time to work on them, but with a meeting with one team in the afternoon and seven more the rest of the week, and on top of the other things you need to do for him, you already know you’ll be cramming to get everything done. 
You try to manage your breathing. Somehow, your habit of pressing your nails against your palm when you're stressed has miraculously come back today. It was something you developed while working under Mrs. Byun, which you eventually got over after working for Hoseok. You feel the anxiety build up, especially as you look at the half crescent marks on your skin, and it’s times like this that you wish your best friends were based in Seoul instead of Busan, so you’d at least have people to comfort you when things are a little tough. 
It’s not to say that work wasn’t overwhelming before. It definitely was, but Hoseok always found a way to make everything bearable and he was always reasonable with what he demanded of you. Now you’re stuck with a man who already makes you feel like your hard work isn’t enough. 
You make it to the office with no other words said and a thick tension in the air. It follows you to the elevator and into Jungkook’s room, where he dismisses you so he can prepare for the first meeting of the day. You rush to your desk and get on with your tasks, making sure to work on the annotated project file that he needs by the afternoon. 
It’s an hour later when you find yourself in the conference room for the meeting with the management support team. You prepped them just 10 minutes earlier, and while you tried to hide your frustration, your unusual lack of energy told them enough that it wasn’t exactly a good start of the day. 
They come in one by one, and you take the time to prepare Jungkook’s coffee, remembering from his former assistant’s notes how he wants it. He’d put it off earlier, given that he prefers to drink his protein shake after his workout, so this is the first time you’re doing it for him.
His eyes flit from the coffee in front of him to you as you place it on the table.
“Two espresso shots and half teaspoon each of milk and sugar,” you state, wanting to confirm that you got it right.
He merely takes a sip, places it down again, and then starts the meeting. 
How bold of you to assume that he’d thank you or even acknowledge it, as if he’d shown you even the tiniest amount of gratitude for anything you've done for him since Friday. Which he hasn’t. 
You let it go and proceed to sit next to him, your eyes and ears ready for what you already predict is gonna be a long meeting. 
It ends over three hours later. As you expected, he had a lot of questions. He made sure that each member had time to explain their current tasks and how they will monitor the projects assigned to them. You didn’t miss the way he’d acknowledged them with “good” and “well done,” and thanked them after they finished. He only nodded at you after your turn, with his eyes barely meeting yours, and for all the confidence you built over the past three years, you can’t process how it’s his non-acknowledgment that’s just going to undo all that. And quite frankly, you’re unsure if that’s on him or if that’s on you. 
Half of the meeting was spent discussing the big project that he wants to take on as Vice President. There’s a property they recently acquired - a non-operational arts center that he wants to revive by adding a performance hall, small theaters, a grand library, function rooms, and a permanent exhibition presenting the buildings that his family had developed over the years to showcase their architectural designs. 
You saw the excitement in your team members’ faces. Hoseok took over with several unfinished projects so you all had to focus on those. Aside from Manager Lee, this is the first time that you’re all handling something new and different. Even you felt the excitement creep in, a welcome emotion given how your day’s been going, but that shattered once he said that he wants it done by June of next year in time for an International Media Festival happening in August. The 12-month period he’s giving is too short with everything he wants to do, and you saw that the team felt the same. 
You go to them after Jungkook leaves for a lunch meeting, and their sighs and pouty faces tell you enough. Mr. Lee does his job of encouraging the team, and you add that you’re all gonna be supporting each other through it all. Sure, you’d have to match Jungkook’s ambition and thoroughness, but you should all take it as a challenge. 
You’re clearly not convinced yourself as the words come out of your mouth, but you don’t have time to debrief with them, as you still have that meeting with the design department that you have to prepare for. You take two biscuits and a cup of tea, and you decide that this is enough to last you throughout lunch, given that you’ll be spending the entirety of it working on the files. 
You don’t realize that an hour and a half have passed until you hear footsteps and see Jungkook’s form appear in the hallway. You stand to greet him, with him asking if you’re done with the annotated documents. 
“I’ll send it in five minutes, sir,” you say, hoping he’ll at least give you that. 
“Okay,” he responds. “Come to my office after you’ve sent it.”
“Yes, sir,” you say, quickly finishing the last two pages once he closes the door. 
You rush to get everything done and click send, then you head to his office and prepare yourself for more questions. It’s quiet inside as you watch him behind the desk, with his legs crossed and his eyebrows furrowed as he reads the document. You answer one of his questions and it’s at that moment when your very empty stomach decides to make itself known.
You freeze on your spot, as the grumbling sound starts low, getting louder for a few beats before it temporarily stops. Your eyes widen in embarrassment, and you press your belly so hard with your fingers in hopes that that would do anything, even if you’re too far gone at this point. Your only hope is that it was all in your head, but Jungkook’s eyes flitting to you tells you otherwise. The only other sound in his room is the air purifier, but it’s not remotely loud enough to drown out your intense hunger. 
It goes again, and all you can do is look away; humiliating yourself was definitely not the plan for your first day as Jeon Jungkook’s assistant.
“Do you need to step away, Ms. Cho?” He asks, not meeting your eyes. 
“Oh, it’s not… uh,” a bowel emergency or something, you want to say. “I just had a busy lunch break.” 
You settle for that, a hint that you’d spent its entirety doing something in such a short notice. Hoseok would always be apologetic whenever he had you do something during your break; he always made up for it with a nice meal as thanks. You doubt you’d get anything close to that from this man.
Jungkook hums and surprisingly doesn’t ask for anything else. He dismisses you and orders you to go ahead and prepare the conference room for the next meeting, and you do just that, dropping by the pantry for a muffin that you eat in four bites, in hopes that it would be enough to shut your stomach for the next three hours. 
Right as you exit, Jungkook picks up his phone to make a call. And then another one.
“Mr. Ri, please pick up the pastries that Ms. Cho ordered at the food hall,” he instructs his chauffeur. “She’s too busy right now.”
“Will do, Mr. Jeon.”
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Taking minutes of a meeting when you’re starving is not a good thing. You know this because you’ve done this so many times, like during monthly executive meetings and the quarterly board meetings that have you spread out thin. It’s also not rare to miss out on lunch because there’s a report to finish or a site to visit; during events, you go on a day with having barely eaten anything. 
But just because you’re used to it, it doesn’t mean that your body has fully adapted, because here you are, eyeing the croissants in front of you, your mouth watering at the gloss and softness of the pastry. They’re so tempting and also out of reach, given that you need to be entirely focused on the discussion that you’re documenting, and munching on something is out of the question. You don’t even know where this is from and you think maybe the design department called for snacks but it’s really not helping your concentration.
You hope the way you’re nibbling your lips doesn’t give you away, but Yoongi from across the table picks it up, as you get a notification of his message.
[From: Min Yoongi] you didn’t have lunch, did you? 
You ignore the prompt on your laptop and respond to him with a look instead. You know your pouty lips will give him his answer, and he merely shakes his head at the confirmation. 
You do your best to shut out the sight and scent of the food before you, absorbing instead the discussion so you can note this down properly with just minimal edits needed. You have a lot of documents to work on for the next few days after all, and that’s on top of the file reorganization that Jungkook asked you to do. 
It works after you hang on by a thread for two and a half hours, a little earlier than you expected to finish. All you want is to sneak out that croissant and maybe some tarts, too, but your heart breaks when you look up and find the boxes empty. 
You let out a sigh, relieved that your boss didn’t hear you because he’s already on the phone and heading out the door. But it’s that same time that a plate of food appears in front of you, and it feels like the gates of heaven have opened. You’re not surprised anymore to find out who it’s from.
“Eat,” Yoongi says from next to you. “I could see your hands shaking from across the table.”
“What about you?” You ask, your lips in a pout once more. 
“You know I don’t eat these things,” he shrugs.
He doesn’t, and you know this, too. You also know he called dibs on these earlier, seeing as his staff were quick to get them, and he’d saved these so he could give them to you. 
“Ten years later and you’re still trying to make sure I eat, huh?” You say, nudging him with your hips to tease.
“If I don’t, who would?” He responds, walking out of the conference room with you. “You have a bad habit of not doing that.”
“Well, duty calls. What can I do?” 
“Take care of yourself even if it’s hard,” he replies. 
“Says the man who rarely does it himself,” you chuckle. 
“You know, the best advice I give are the ones I don’t actually follow, so disregard the fact that I don’t even do what I say because they apparently work,” he says. “But I mean it, ___. Eat this now.”
“Thanks, Yoongi,” you smile, taking a piece of pastry and eating it in two bites. 
Your puffed out cheeks cause him to laugh, and despite still being hungry after this, you suppose it’s enough to not make you faint at this moment. 
“And eat a proper dinner, okay?” He follows up.
“I’ll be off late, so I’ll just grab something from the convenience store,” you say. “That’s as proper as I can afford tonight.”
“Aish, fine,” he shakes his head. “But let me get you coffee at least. Those tarts won’t taste as good without one.”
“That would be life-saving,” you dramatically say. “What did I do to deserve a friend like you?”
“Don’t know. I mean, I’m not that great,” he shrugs. 
You playfully roll your eyes. “I’ll save the compliments once I have the coffee.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” he feigns annoyance, gesturing for you to get back to your desk then walking the other direction. 
You take your seat and clean up the document, deciding that you’ll just review the meeting minutes tomorrow so you can get on with other pressing matters. It’s 20 minutes later when Yoongi returns, a tall cup of coffee on one hand and a banana loaf on the other.
“This is all they have left,” he says. “I hope it can last you until tonight.”
“It will,” you smile. “Thank you again. No one looks out for me here as much as you do. And that means a lot, more than you know. I don’t think I would’ve survived all these years without you.”
“Wow, all because of coffee and snacks,” he laughs, teasing. 
“It’s a fair trade. You feed me during my greatest need, I boost your ego,” you tease back. 
“Yeah, whatever,” Yoongi huffs in submission, but you know he enjoys it. 
You’re thankful that after everything that’s happened, you’re still able to maintain the friendship that you created when you were a mere intern and he was just starting out his career. 
“Anyway, I’m quickly meeting Jungkook and I need the portfolio of the contemporary arts institution joint project from 2019. It was VP-led so I assume it’s still here? Unless it’s in the archive room,” he continues.
“It’s within five years so it should be here,” you say, turning to the shelf behind you to confirm. 
You spot what you need and make the attempt to pull it out but your fingers barely even touch the rack.
“Need help?” Yoongi asks.
“And what help could you give, huh?” You tease again, earning you a playful groan.
“You brat.”
You laugh and pull out the small stool you keep for times like this. 
“Just make sure I don’t fall and embarrass myself further today,” you say, climbing up the steps then pulling out the heavy folder. 
You feel Yoongi’s arm move from where it was near your waist to over your head, as he lightens the load. You both try to balance it and laugh at your distorted faces in the process, and it’s moments of relief like this one that you’re glad you’re afforded after a long day like today. 
From inside the room, Jungkook sees you through the window, your eyes crinkling as you laugh along with Yoongi, head of the design department and one of his very few friends in the company. It catches him off guard, as he realizes that since meeting you last Friday, he’s never seen you laugh, much less smile or even have an expression that isn’t agitated or serious.
He knows that that’s probably on him. He’d spoken ill of you after all, something he regretted once he saw the frustration on your face when you made it known that you were in the room with them and had definitely heard everything he said. But he’d been tired and HR confirmed that he could bring Lucas over as his assistant; CEO Jeon was the one who vetoed that decision. 
Jungkook had already mentally prepared himself for the ease of his transition, knowing that he’d be assisted by someone who knows how he works and the quality of outputs he expects, only to come here and be told by his father that the current staff will stay, and that you - someone he’d only heard of as Hoseok’s assistant - will be the one assisting him from now on. Your resume didn’t even impress him.
Jungkook doesn’t like change and when he has to undergo it, he needs as much of what was familiar and convenient to remain; that’s the only bit of control he can have and he hates not being in control of things. You just happened to unluckily be at the receiving end of his anger.
But unlike what he expected, you stood up to him in the subtle ways you could. He’s been so used to people just following him, partly because his way is always the best but also because he commands that respect, and he knows his capabilities enough to know that he deserves it as well. So when you answered back, he felt rattled and just a little bit uneasy. He was unable to backtrack after, but he didn’t really plan to.
That doesn’t mean that he didn’t plan on being a bit of a jerk today, too. He’d been exhausted working over the weekend after going through all the files you gave him that he snoozed his alarm so many times and ended up doing his workout later than he intended. When you rang the doorbell and stood by his door with your skirt and satin top, he suddenly felt lightheaded.
He mentally smacked himself once the thought that your pastel colored outfit brought out your eyes more than the monochrome ensemble from last week floated in his head. He just hated that not only are you thorough with your work, you have to be beautiful, too. He’d never admit to anyone that both of those things make him nervous, and it’s the only reason why he thinks he needs to establish his authority so that he doesn’t get rattled the next time you counter him.
That’s why he demanded more work, which he didn’t intend to take up so much of your time, like your lunch break. He’d seen how your hands shook while you were taking notes during the meeting, prompting him to end the meeting early so you can have something to eat of what he’d bought but he’d left before he could find out if there was anything left for you. 
Maybe there wasn’t enough, as he also witnessed Yoongi hand you what seemed like food with coffee that the man also got for you just minutes ago. The smile you gave him was bright and sincere. Jungkook doesn’t think he’d ever see that directed at him, considering how he’d been to you on his first day, but maybe that’s also good; that could be his defense. Maybe it’d help quell that initial attraction that he doesn’t want and cannot allow at all to grow.
It doesn’t mean it doesn’t agitate him to see you a bit too close with his friend, because with the way you seem so comfortable and with the way that Yoongi sports that rare smile, it almost feels like there’s something there.
Jungkook is the son of the CEO, and having personal relationships within the company isn’t exactly advisable, but he’d gone to university with Yoongi and their introverted personalities instantly clicked. The older man is perhaps the only non-relative company employee that Jungkook kept in touch with when he was in Singapore, not that he even really talked much to his family outside of work anyway.
But in all the years of their friendship, his friend never mentioned any relationship - nor the makings of one - with another staff member. Jungkook hates how his curiosity is slowly getting to him. Maybe a few more moments would tell him more, but something about the scene happening outside his room is making him nervous and uneasy, so he decides to step in.
“Hey, Yoon,” he says as he opens the door. “Can we discuss now? I have to meet my parents for dinner in an hour.”
Your bubble with Yoongi bursts at the sound of Jungkook’s voice, and you immediately return to your seat. Your friend nods at you then enters the room, leaving you the peace and quiet you need to plop down on the floor for a quick snack of your loaf before going back to work, glancing inside every once in a while to see how the two are going, and perhaps confirm the friendship that you didn’t expect the two would have.
“This building is a good starting point,” Yoongi agrees with Jungkook. “If this is the general feel you want for the Arts Center, I can look into other projects and designs and come up with ideas. I’ll just ask ___ for the files I need.”
“You two seem close,” Jungkook says too quickly. 
Leaning back against the chair, Yoongi processes the question that he didn’t expect he’d hear. More than that, he tries to read what’s underneath it, knowing that his friend’s tone of voice and feigned stoic expression mean something more.
“You could say that,” Yoongi replies. “She did say that no one’s looked out for her here as much as I have. And that she wouldn’t have survived all these years without me.”
“So you’re actually friends?”
“Yes.”
“Were you more?”
Yoongi chuckles, the question giving him the answer he’s looking for. Jungkook may often be too serious but he can be transparent sometimes, too.
“Does it matter?” The older man asks.
“Just don’t want to be surprised, that’s all,” Jungkook shrugs. “If there’s an employee relationship happening under my nose, I should at least know.”
“It happens here a lot,” Yoongi responds. “I mean, it gives people something to gossip about but it’s how things are - work sucks sometimes and we want someone to hold at the end of a terrible day.”
Feeling like he won’t get an answer to a question that Jungkook doesn’t know why he felt the need to ask in the first place, he just shakes his head to concede. 
But it’s what prompts Yoongi to reply. 
“We met when she was just an intern,” he says. “We used to take the same bus then found out we both came from Daegu. Then she was employed and we were both on the logistics team before I was reassigned and she got the EA role.”
Jungkook merely hums, taking in the information.
“I also asked her out before,” Yoongi continues, earning him a surprised look from the younger man. “You just can’t help what you feel sometimes, you know?  But she turned me down, said she didn’t want to lead me on because she didn’t feel anything more. She also doesn’t like being involved with a co-worker, so yeah.”
“How are you still friends?”
“Asks the guy who’s still friends with his ex,” Yoongi laughs.
“Chaerin and I are civil, there’s a difference. And we haven’t spoken in years.”
“You loved her, though,” Yoongi counters. “I never got to that point.”
“This isn’t about me,” Jungkook huffs. 
Knowing it’s a topic that his friend doesn’t like talking about, Yoongi relents. “I moved on. That was years ago,” he says. “And it seemed like she needed someone. I mean, she’s not from here and her friends aren’t here, either. She appreciated the friendship even if she said she didn’t think she deserved it. I guess that made me really get over her, you know? That’s all she wanted and needed from me; it was better than not having her around.”
“How brave,” Jungkook remarks. 
“You mean mature?” Yoongi corrects. “Yes, that’s what I am, and it’s the best I could be for her. Especially since she’s got a boss who makes her miss lunch because somehow, there’s just so much to do for your first day on the job.”
“Don’t remind me,” Jungkook groans. 
“I will. Only so you could feel bad.”
“I already do. That’s why I…”
“Bought the pastries,” Yoongi finishes. “I mean, I didn’t order them.”
“Was any even left for her?” Jungkook sighs, remembering how he was internally screaming for you to just get from the box and he’d been the jerk to not offer you some even if it was technically for you.
“Sort of. I put some aside for myself so I could give them to her.”
“You sure you don’t like her anymore?” Jungkook cocks an eyebrow, an attempt to hide his uneasiness over something he doesn’t understand. He finds you attractive, that’s it. He doesn’t know why his mind searches for more answers.
“You don’t have to like someone romantically to be nice to them, you know?” Yoongi responds. “And she needed it. Heavens know the support she’d need now that she has to deal with your rude ass.”
Jungkook sighs, but the remark is a welcome one because he did tell Yoongi not to treat him differently just because he’s the Vice President now. He also partly agrees. But he sees the effort; his friend wouldn’t call him out for how he does things, so the most he would do is offer help to you. And Jungkook could maybe take advantage of that, as Yoongi stands up to leave.
“Hey, could you, uh, grab dinner for her at the food hall? And not say it’s from me?”
“The food hall’s closed,” Yoongi says.
“The cafe down the street, then?”
“You can’t be fucking serious,” the older man groans. 
But Yoongi knows his friend, knows the distance he creates from the people around him, knows his need to have control over everything, including his feelings, and knows the walls he builds because it’s easier to keep others out rather than do the hard task of letting them into a space that’s become comfortable because he’s been the only one inside for so long.
So Yoongi does as he’s asked. He takes the money then heads to the cafe to order pork cutlets and curry. He returns and sets them on your desk to your surprise, and you ask what it’s for.
“Just thought you deserve more than just convenience store instant noodles and gimbap given the day you’ve had,” he says. 
“Hey, those are delicious,” you pout, but wanting to melt at how good the rice bowl smells. “But thank you, again. I owe you a lot, Yoongi. I mean it.”
“Just make sure to eat on time so I don’t have to buy your dinner again,” he teases. “I mean it. You have to stay healthy, okay?”
“Okay,” you smile brightly. “Get home safe tonight.”
Jungkook glances out the window and holds back a smile himself at how innocent and genuinely happy you look. There’s this joy that you seem to enjoy to yourself and he sees that, he understands that. And somehow that’s enough to lessen the guilt for now. 
He still doesn’t know if he’ll ever see that smile directed at him or if he’d ever want that because of how disarming it is. But seeing it from afar is enough; it’s trivial and short enough to let him bask in it without having to climb out of his walls. He’ll watch you from behind, he thinks. He just wishes he doesn’t push you away in the process.
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letjungcoook7 · 2 months
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does he know? || jjk || +18
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things can get complicated when you're involved with your boyfriend's brother.
☾ w.c: 1,7k
☾ pairing: jungkook x fem!reader
☾ rating: 18+ minors do not interact.
☾ genre: smut
☾ warnings: mirror sex, creampie, petnames, unprotected sex, slightly choking. this one shot contains cheating. it's only in an imaginative scenario, but if you don't feel comfortable with the theme, don't read it. thank you!
☾ author's note: i hope you liked it, let me know your feedbacks ❤️✨
You're a cheater, and so is Jungkook. 
You cheat on your boyfriend.
He cheats on his brother. 
You should feel guilty, and to be honest, you actually feel it. But the way Jungkook kisses your neck with such devotion is completely holy. And you can't help but dive into the deep.
Your back slams against the bathroom door, the music blaring outside as you release a soft groan, overcome by the intensity of his kisses on your neck, sending shivers down your spine. With your skirt lifted to your hips, he squeezes your ass cheeks firmly, drawing you closer against his hips.
Each time Jungkook's lips meet yours, his desperation grows palpable, mirroring your own. It's been nearly a month since you last saw each other. During that time apart, you were traveling with his brother to Japan on a romantic trip. His touch speaks not only of longing but of possessiveness and anger. He presses you against him as if afraid you might slip away, and maybe you would.
Caught in the fervor of the moment, the air thick with tension and desire, you struggle to reconcile the conflicting emotions swirling within you. The memory of the romantic trip to Japan with his brother lingers, casting a shadow over the illicit passion shared in this cramped restroom.
But Jungkook's touch ignites a primal longing, erasing rational thought as his fingers trace fiery patterns along your skin. His kisses speak of yearning and frustration, a silent plea for reassurance in the midst of chaos.
As he presses you closer, his grip tightening with each heartbeat, you teeter on the edge of recklessness. The lines blur between right and wrong, desire and guilt, as you surrender to the intoxicating whirlwind of forbidden affection.
You've been in a committed relationship with Jungkook's brother for two years. However, there's a complicated history between you and Jungkook. For three years, you engaged in a casual sex with him, unaware of his deeper feelings for you. 
Jungkook's brother, was always aware of Jungkook's love for you, still harbors feelings for you himself. The situation becomes even more tangled as Jungkook's brother remains oblivious to your past involvement with Jungkook. 
Jungkook is in love with you, and you don't know whom you are in love with. 
Is it wrong to say both?
You don't know.
As you ran your fingers through Jungkook's long hair, you couldn't shake the feeling that he was the one meant for you. With each touch, you could sense the anticipation in his breath, his hard dick evident under the pants he was wearing, ready to give you pleasure.
As you raised your leg to meet his hip, increasing the contact and friction between you two, his moans echoed your own desire. 
"I've missed the sound of your moan so much, Kook", you confessed softly as he captured your lower lip between his teeth.
"I missed you so much" he murmured as he took his fingers to the fabric of your panties, caressing your clit.  As your moans filled the air, you locked eyes with him.
"You're dripping wet for me," he whispers, his tongue grazing his lips, eyes ablaze with lust.
“I am,” you breathe, your gaze drawn to his fingers expertly exploring your most sensitive spot. "I bet you're going to slide it inside my pussy" you say, running your thumb between his lips and he smiles for a second before wrapping the tip of your finger in his own lips and sucking slowly.
"Is this what you want?" he asks, his voice low and intense. "Getting fucked at your homecoming party with all your friends and your boyfriend down stairs?"
You meet his gaze with unwavering determination. "Yes," you affirm, your desire mirroring his own. 
"And will you be able to be fucked by me in silence? You always scream for more and you know it" he challenges, his eyes piercing into yours, stripping away any semblance of restraint.
Your body quivers with anticipation, every nerve tingling with the need for Jungkook to consume you entirely. The ache between your thighs grows unbearable, aching for his touch, his possession. Your pussy is clenching around nothing and your body is burning with such need to have Jungkook ruin you.
"You're nothing but a bitch," he growls, his voice thick with anger, as he wrenches your thigh from his hip and guides you forcefully to the expansive mirror in the dimly lit bathroom of your boyfriend's friend's house. Your makeup, though still intact, is disheveled, a reflection of the turmoil within, mirrored by Jungkook's own tousled appearance. His arm, adorned with tattoos, encircles your hair tightly, anchoring you in place before the mirror, forcing you to stare your own reflection.
Your gaze flickers away momentarily, only to be drawn back as Jungkook unzips his pants. The mirror reflects a tantalizing glimpse of his throbbing cock, glistening with precum. 
With a firm grip on your hair, Jungkook asserts his dominance, guiding you downward until your torso bends, and your ass protrudes invitingly. Gripping the sink with both hands, you submit to his command, yielding to the primal urge that courses through your veins. Slowly, you press your hips against his, the friction igniting a wildfire of sensation.
"Filthy whore," he hisses, his voice a seductive snarl, "You'll watch your own reflection as I wreck you." In that moment, there is only the two of you. 
Jungkook's cockhead slips effortlessly into the slick folds of your drenched core, eliciting a soft whimper of longing from deep within you. You ache for release, for the sweet release of ecstasy that only he can provide.
But Jungkook is a master of anticipation, a tantalizing tease who revels in the power of control. 
"You must beg," his voice resonates with authority, sending shivers cascading down your spine. 
"What?" you gasp, the urgency in your voice betraying your desire.
"Beg," he commands, his tone unwavering, a testament to his dominance. 
Your entire being quivers in response, consumed by the overwhelming need to surrender to him completely. "Jungkook..." you whimper.
"Beg," he repeats.
"Please, fuck me. Fill me with your dick, I need you so fucking much," you implore. The words spill from your lips like a fervent prayer, a desperate plea born of raw desire.
And he does.  
With a swift motion, Jungkook guides his dick into you, his entry a fusion of desire and urgency, with a strong thrust. Your breath catches in your throat as he plunges deep, filling you to the brink. His cock pulses within you as he stretches the walls of your pussy. 
You stifle a gasp, your hand instinctively flying to cover your mouth, suppressing the scream that threatens to escape. Jungkook's grip tightens on your hair, his touch both commanding and possessive as he anchors himself to your hip, driving his movements with unbridled passion. Deep and strong. You clenching uncontrollably against his dick. 
"Always so tight, no matter how many times I fuck that pussy, it's always so hot and tight for my dick" he says, in between shallow, panting breaths. 
“And you’re always huge, I can never get used to you, Jungkook” you look at him through the reflection in the mirrors. His hair falls over his forehead and his eyes are sharp, dark with desire, his brow is furrowed and the dimples in his cheeks appear through his lips pressed together.
Jungkook's movements are primal, each thrust an affirmation of his dominance. With every stroke, he delves deeper into the depths of your being, unraveling you with each relentless push.
His words, whispered against your skin: "You're mine," he growls.
You surrender to him completely, lost in the intoxicating pleasure and surrender. 
"I'm going to fill you with cum" he growls, increasing the pace of his thrusts, "I'm going to leave you dripping so you can go back to your party and talk to people who have no idea what we're doing right under their noses." Jungkook lets go of your hair and leans over your back and grabs your neck, squeezing it. "and then you're going to kiss my brother's mouth with your panties dirty with my cum and he doesn't even imagine that I fuck that pussy like he's never been able to do."
As you whimper in response, he tightens his grip on your throat, a firm reminder of his control. With gentle insistence, he lifts your chin, directing your gaze to the reflection before you. His face rests against your shoulder, his breath hot against your skin as his movements grow more forceful, his cock plunging in and out of your slick pussy.
A faint moan escapes your lips, and in response, he tightens his hold, a silent command for silence. Tears well in your eyes, a testament to the raw intensity of the moment, as you surrender to the overwhelming sensations coursing through you.
As the intensity builds, a primal urgency fills the air, heightening the sensation of every thrust. With each movement, you feel yourself teetering on the edge of ecstasy.
Jungkook's breath grows ragged, his movements becoming more erratic as he approaches the brink of release. With a guttural groan, he drives himself deeper, his rhythm becoming more desperate, more urgent.
"Does he know you like being fucked raw and hard?" Jungkook asks, his voice echoing throughout the bathroom. You moan softly and close your eyes tightly, biting your own lip.
"Does he know?" he asks once again.
"No, he doesn't know." you respond weakly, your voice barely leaving your lips.
And then, he surrenders to the pleasure, his body trembling with the force of his climax. You feel him pulsing within you, and he releases long jets of cum inside your pussy.
But the relentless rhythm of his thrusts continues unabated. His movements pushes you closer to the edge. His touch ignites a fire within you, consuming you.  
And then, in a moment of pure abandon, you come. It crashes over you like a wave, washing away any semblance of restraint. Your body quivers with the intensity of it.
As Jungkook presses his lips tenderly against your shoulder, then your neck, and finally a lingering kiss on your cheek, he leaves you to contemplate your reflection in the mirror. His departure leaves a palpable absence, a lingering warmth that still courses through your veins.
"Are you okay?" he inquires, his voice soft with concern as he begins to tidy himself up. 
“Yeah,” you manage to murmur, your gaze still fixed on the reflection before you.
Straightening your back, you turn to face him, finding solace in the warmth of his touch as he cups your face and plants a gentle kiss upon your lips. 
"See you down there?" he asks, a hint of anticipation.
With a nod, you offer him a faint smile, your heart heavy with the weight of unspoken words.
As Jungkook slips away discreetly, ensuring that no prying eyes catch sight of him, you're left alone in the bathroom, consumed by a torrent of guilt that threatens to suffocate you. 
You're truly fucked.
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