#jupiter ascending

[haveyouseenthismovie-poll]

[dykediitsi]

obsessed w jupiter ascending because the most elaborate and nuanced deconstruction of capitalism i have ever seen in modern media is literally just a backdrop for whatever the hell was going on with channing tatum for 90 minutes

[sci-fi-gifs]

JUPITER ASCENDING (2015) dir. Lana & Lilly Wachowski

[ezekiel-krishna]

🎯Bedroom Romance Observations

When it comes to bedroom romance, the rising sign can offer insights into the individual's preferences and desires.

Aries Rising:

For Aries rising, passion and excitement are key. They tend to be energetic and impulsive in the bedroom, and they love to take charge. Try introducing some playful competition or a new physical challenge to keep things interesting.

Taurus Rising:

Taurus rising individuals tend to be sensual and grounded. They enjoy indulging their senses and appreciate a comfortable, luxurious atmosphere. Try incorporating soft lighting, plush fabrics, and delicious treats to set the mood.

Gemini Rising:

For Gemini rising, mental stimulation is key. They enjoy flirting and verbal banter, and they appreciate partners who can keep up with their witty repartee. Try incorporating games, puzzles, or role-playing scenarios to keep things interesting.

Cancer Rising:

For Cancer rising, emotional connection is essential. They tend to be nurturing and intuitive, and they enjoy feeling close to their partners. Try incorporating elements of nurturing touch, like massage or cuddling.

Leo Rising:

Leo rising individuals tend to be confident and bold. They enjoy being the center of attention and appreciate partners who can match their enthusiasm. Try incorporating dramatic lighting, bold colors, and attention-grabbing lingerie to make them feel like a star.

Virgo Rising:

For Virgo rising, attention to detail is key. They tend to be meticulous and precise, and they appreciate partners who can appreciate the small things. Try incorporating clean, crisp sheets, fresh scents, and carefully planned surprises to keep them satisfied.

Libra Rising:

Libra rising individuals tend to be romantic and gracious. They enjoy beauty and harmony, and they appreciate partners who can appreciate their aesthetic sensibilities. Try incorporating soft music, artful décor, and romantic gestures to make them feel loved.

Scorpio Rising:

For Scorpio rising, intensity is essential. They tend to be passionate and transformative, and they appreciate partners who are willing to explore the depths of their emotions. Try incorporating candlelight, sensual scents, and taboo-busting fantasies to keep things spicy.

Sagittarius Rising:

Sagittarius rising individuals tend to be adventurous and free-spirited. They enjoy exploration and expansion, and they appreciate partners who share their curiosity. Try incorporating travel, new experiences, and open-minded experimentation to keep them engaged.

Capricorn Rising:

For Capricorn rising, discipline and control are key. They tend to be practical and goal-oriented, and they appreciate partners who can help them achieve their ambitions. Try incorporating structured routines, clear expectations, and rewards-based systems to keep them motivated.

Aquarius Rising:

Aquarius rising individuals tend to be unconventional and intellectually curious. They enjoy exploring new ideas and perspectives, and they appreciate partners who are open-minded and non-judgmental. Try incorporating intellectually stimulating conversations, avant-garde experiences, and boundary-pushing play to keep things interesting.

Pisces Rising:

For Pisces rising, emotional connection and sensitivity are essential. They tend to be intuitive and empathetic, and they appreciate partners who can match their depth of feeling. Try incorporating romantic gestures, spiritual practices, and emotionally expressive communication to keep them engaged.

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[thehumantrampoline]

God I love Jupiter Ascending so fucking unironically!!!! It's literally no sillier than Star Wars has ever been, it's WONDERFULLY, GORGEOUSLY silly, every outlandish piece of worldbuilding they throw around willy nilly makes me clap my little hands in delight, it's lavish and unselfconscious and there's a hundred miles of universe extrapolation you can do under every step they take, I love the three part fairy story structure of royalty and deals and trickery, I love how every character is introduced and treated like a beloved character we've all met before, I love the costumes and the soundtrack, I love Eddie Redmayne getting to be larger than life unhinged space opera villainous, I love Caine Wise the half albino angel werewolf, I love his chemistry with fake cynical hardass Jupiter Jones and her big romantic bleeding heart, I love this fuckin!! movie!!!!

[timeismyally]

I’ll always have a soft spot for gigantic space/fantasy epic films with million dollar budgets that just sucked and tanked at the box office.

[wearethewitches]

My Jupiter Ascending kick is absolutely stealing my brain this month, enough that I commissioned Jupiter and Kalique from the amazing ✨@deannamb✨, because they are the best, and they deserve more fan art.

(Yes, Kalique is definitely flirting. Yes, Jupiter is horrified and in disbelief at the very thought. And maybe a tiny bit flattered.)

[characterswithgodsnamesbattle]

Prelims

Poll B2

8 contestants, 4 spots for the tournament

*as I was kindly informed, Thorfinn's in fact from the CBS version of the show - I changed the tags but can't modify the poll itself

[skinnyscottishbloke]

✨the holy trinity of campy space operas✨

[lucy-moderatz]

You know, bees are genetically designed to recognize royalty.

[andromeda3116]

okay but some of the ideas in jupiter ascending are literally so galaxy-brained? like, the concept that capitalism taken to its utmost extreme would result in a "superior" (read: ultra-wealthy) class exploiting whole planets of people for their own gain? the way that the three siblings play off each other, when you're ultimately left like "shit man at least balem fucking told her he wanted her dead even though he had some seriously fucked-up emotions regarding his dead mother like holy shit can you say oedipus complex my god". but the sister is like, "the ultimate resource, the only one that matters, is more time" and that's a profound concept and also again so horrifically accurate and dystopian because she's literally stealing time from not just people but whole planets' worth of people, and has been for thousands of years, they've grown them for this purpose and of course that would be elon musk's fucking wet dream, to be able to buy himself more time, and while i don't think he or anyone else would just like. immediately jump to "kill whole planets for it" i also think that if he felt like that was the only way, he would be like "it's the Greater Good. i have Unlocked Immortality For The Human Race" and be totally blind to the fact that it was only for the rich ones, on the backs of everyone else. and yet she's still nice? just because you're a genocidal self-serving ultra-capitalist immortal monster doesn't mean you have to be a jerk about it. which is so. how the human condition works?

and yet this movie also has "bees can sense royalty" and whatever the fuck was going on with channing tatum's character and a wooden (yet somehow refreshingly horny*) love story and an exhaustingly-long chase scene that could have been thirty seconds and the Great Disappearing Sean Bean Daughter and

like it's somehow simultaneously "terrible idea, flawless execution" and "flawless idea, terrible execution"

(*in contrast to the "everyone is beautiful, no one is horny" trope, channing tatum looks like a snack and by god is mila kunis ready to eat him)

[avatarmerida]

LEAKED: Watching and Dreaming Huntlow confession (not fake)

[sinshiney]

i would love to know about the non-existent griddlehark Jupiter ascending au. please.

nnnNNNHGGG YESSs okay so, this is also technically a Nova au because I love when Harrow gets to punch things.

Gideon is the genetic match for Jod's late daughter, Prince Kiriona, and she replaces her as his new heir. She works at a Renaissance Faire during the summer between semesters at university and makes extra money by selling her plasma.

Since Kiriona's death, the Lyctors (Mercy, Augustine, and newcomer Ianthe) have been arguing over how her inheritance should be divided up and Gideon showing up throws a wrench into everyone's plans. Ianthe was hoping to use Kiriona's death to rise in the ranks of the Lyctors, but realizes that she's being shut out by Mercy and Augustine. She sends Harrow (an indentured servant and former soldier/ Gideon's new catboy girlfriend) to retrieve Gideon with the intention of getting into Jod's good graces.

Coronabeth and Camilla are mercenaries who have been working the RennFaire for weeks to get close to Gideon. Corona keeps trying to murder her for Ianthe's sake, and Camilla is trying her best to keep Gideon from walking straight into sexy, sexy death. Harrow shows up, makes a lot of noise, inadvertently sets half the faire on fire, and immediately kidnaps Gideon.

That's all I've got so far! I just thought it would be really fun to have an angry Nova catgirl supersoldier who's Jod's perfect killing machine but she only weighs 8 lbs and Gideon keeps scritching her ears. Plus the actual TLT parallel of people constantly dressing Gideon up like a doll. Also, Harrow gets to break up Gideon and Ianthe's wedding.

Also also, please consider the 'i like dogs' scene:

Gideon : Maybe it's my genes. Maybe I have defective engineering, too. [moving closer] And if that's the case... is there any way to fix it?

Nova: [backing away] You are royalty now. I'm a Splice. You don't understand what that means but... I have more in common with a cat than I have with you.

Gideon: I love cats. I've always loved cats.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk

[takiki16]

Hey so I am starting to get into Jupiter Ascending fandom (a couple years late but what can I say). I was thinking of writing a fic. Do you have any resources for JA extra information?

Thanks in advance. Also I am loving your fic (it's how I started getting into the fandom lololol). can't wait to reread!!!

HOOOOOOO BOY!!!!

I'm paging @bemusedlybespectacled, @gallifreyburning, @vr-trakowski, @sorrelchestnut, @florentinequill, @fuckyeahjupiterascending, @vrabia, and honestly ANYONE ELSE who wants to chime in here, bc HOOOOOOO BOY!

(I made that sweet puppy in fucking 2015 on my dying laptop in the travel study dorm in DC, JUPITER ASCENDING HOW I LOVE THEE)

The eternal fucking tragedy of Jupiter Ascending is that the wider world doesn't love it like we do. Does it have every single thing that turns my crank, id-wise? Sure! Does it have gorgeous over-the-top sequined costumes and extravagant set pieces that remind you at every minute that this movie specially thanked Swarovski Crystal in the credits? Sure! Does it have theeeee single most pinpoint reading of MY PERSONAL FEMALE GAZE that Channing Tatum has ever done? (sorry mister Magic Mike, but you do not even come CLOSE to "may I kill him?" in terms of sexy) SURE! Was this movie a commercial or critical success? Absolutely not 😔

There isn't, as far as I'm aware, an art book. There isn't an official novelization. There isn't even an actual script posted to the usual internet databases that isn't just an automatic shitty talk-to-text rendition of the movie dialogue. There are concept art paintings and old cast interviews floating around, and this auction website where the Wachowskis auctioned off some of the props from the movie, but as far as canon resources and extra material beyond the movie itself there isn't much. A quick duckduckgo search would probably be more helpful to you than anything else, if any of the websites still have the articles up - it WAS eight years ago, and doesn't that just break my fucking heart.

My corner of tumblr LOVED this movie. In 2015, there were TONS of posts gathering interviews, posting concept art, making cosplays, all the signs of a small but healthy fandom ecosystem. However, we call this the blue hellsite for a reason - not all of those resources are still there, and the ones that survived time and incompetent archival site coding are probably difficult to find. I would definitely recommend trawling the JA tags of all the blogs I tagged at the start of this post, as JA introduced me to two of my longest and most beloved of all mutuals. ALL of their insights were key to A Fine Chain.

There is also my own jupiter ascending tag and my more specific jupiter ascending meta tag, although I don't know how bored you are lol. The general JA tag is 105 pages - I would almost recommend just starting at page 105 and working forward from there since it chronicles my descent into kinky space angel werewolf brain rot pretty nicely. There are also my ao3 bookmarks for JA.

I WILL SAY that it has been 8 years, and I have changed into a very different person than the one I was when I first saw this movie. I don't REGRET the first few chapters of A Fine Chain, or any of my breathless meta posts, but I do think that if I were to write any of them over again, I'd hope that my writing style has matured and I'd have lots more extra material to draw from. Actually graduating from law school, writing long fic in another fandom, and generally percolating more as a person has given me lots of new perspectives on JA that make it more interesting even as I still enjoy it (for example, HBO's Succession is ODDLY RELEVANT and I wish there were more JA fanwriters to take advantage of that fact).

...I hope that was helpful? I will ETERNALLY mourn the fact that this fandom wasn't isn't bigger - we haven't even broken 1k on ao3! But EYE MYSELF am here to discuss JA stuff as long as this weird spurt of creative energy sustains me, and my inbox is always open!

[potatoesandsunshine]

your introduction to the 'nice' one of the three villainous siblings is her bathing in the equivalent of the blood of a million people. and she is also way too into jupiter. what a MOVIE