suicide cw
look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am.
ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.
this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.
He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!
you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.
it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions.
what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT.
am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying “only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!
yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).
The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.
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RealAgeAU - Godly Lessons
And the one that was third place in the poll!
I had this one ready for a while now so we are uploading it today!!
Timeline wise this is 6 months after Nightmare turned into a baby (so about 3 months after the gang arrived in Farmtale) We good there?
First Drabble (Thanks to @spotaus for the original prompt)
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*---------------*
It took them ages.
And when Dream says ages he means AGES to find Reaper.
It doesn't help that Reaper hardly interacts with anyone. He is so work focused it is crazy.
But, as Blue had said, Reaper was the only one they could ask!
Well... Dream had asked Ink and Error before but Ink had just tilted his skull confused at the question while Error just looked unamused and asked him why the hell he would ask him.
Dream makes a mental note to eventually explain to those two that they may be ascending to godhood soon, if they aren't already there. Look. Dream knows he should tell them this and help them but at the moment Dream is having issues with his own powers.
And honestly wiht those two still having their fifth truce (Look, Ink keeps forgetting they had a truce and so they just keep resigning the same truce agreement.) he still has time before he needs to explain the basics of godhood to them.
Not to forget that Dream is rather unsure nowadays about his own god status. He thought gods didn't change?! They had domains and stuff!
Okay so maybe Dream didn't know a lot about god things and only knew the things that... he had been told ages ago. Either in small snippets by his mother but those had always sounded like an afterthought.
Honestly the things he knows about being a god is all things he had... heard from those... those... horrible villagers... and later people from across the multiverse.
Either way, it means Dream is looking for more information and Blue is helping. Honestly Dream is unsure what he did to deserve Blue as best friend and Dream makes a mental note to somehow thank him for it later. There has to be something Dream can do to make Blue happy and show how thankful he is.
But that is for later.
Now, they are looking for Reaper.
And... well... with him being Death...
Dream has to physically stop Blue from jumping to someones defence as the human in this universe goes about the genocide run. Dream starts to regret his decision to let Blue come along.
"Huh. You aren't suposed to be here."
Dream looks up and smiles "Reaper! It is so good to finally see you!"
Reaper just looks confused before giving a grin "Really now? Why is that?"He winks before his face grows harder as he glances around "Also you two really can not be here."
Blue huffs "We wouldn't be here if you were easier to find. Come on Dream let me go I need to help them!"
Dream shakes his skull "No Blue you can't!"
Reaper sighs as he rubs his face "Okay. You need to talk?" he checks his phone and nods "Let me finish my job here quickly and we will talk on the surface of this universe. Just teleport to the other side of the barrier and I will be there in a bit." and he shoots off after the human, already becoming invisible again.
Dream has to drag Blue through a portal.
They sit in the grass as Blue glares at the ground.
"I am sorry Blue-"
Blue shrugs as he looks away "We could have helped them..."
Dream sighs and nods "I know... but we aren't suposed to interfere in other universes or stories..."
Blue huffs as he mutters "You don't have that problem when your brother does something or Ink wants to interact with people when he isn't suposed to." he doesn't look at him.
Dream frowns as he rubs his arm. Yeah... that is fair... Dream is a hypocrit, he knows that already.
They sit in silence before a chuckle "Wow. What is going on here? Did someone die?" and Reaper grins cheeky.
Blue groans but Dream stands up "I need your help"
Reaper blinks before letting out a long sigh "Dream. We have been over this. I am not picking sides."
Dream shakes his skull "This isn't about that!" he rubs his arm before forcing it out "I am losing my powers."
Reaper immediantly stares at him "What?!" Reaper looks him up and down much more critically.
Dream nods as he looks to the side "It is going slowly. But it is happening... it has been happening slowly but surely over almost half a year now."
Reaper shoots upright "And you only decided to search for answers now!"
Dream feels embarresed "We have been looking for almost 4 months now! But I also have other stuff to do as guardian of positivity!" he crosses his arms.
Blue leans over "Also you are hard to find."
Reaper raises a brow "Just ask Ink. You guys are like roommates half the time."
Blue and Dream share a look.
Reaper looks pained "Oh no what is going on with them now?"
Dream thinks about how to say it before just throwing it out there "They don't know they are gods."
Reaper stops, stares and groans loudly as he covers his face "I thought! I thought they knew what they were doing?! They call themselves god of creation and god of destruction for crying out loud!"
Dream rubs his cheek and shrugs. Blue nods "Yeah. that is what tripped us up too. We asked them if they had heard of gods losing their powers. and Ink just looked confused while Error asked why we asked him. And told us to ask a god instead of them."
Reaper looks so tired before rubbing his forehead "Okay. okay. Good thing those two are on a break of their weird war again. Does explain why they would keep fighting instead of just working together to make sure both get their job done." Reaper frowns as he rubs his face "I will have to ask the others about this... this may become an issue. Someone has to teach them and explain it to them but Ink has the memory of a squirrel and Error doesn't listen unless he respects you..." Reaper looks thoughtful as he mutters "Maybe it is best to go to him... Error and Nightmare already work together and Error respects him..." he frowns and huffs "Will have to find him first..."
Dream flinches at the name of his twin as Blue steps over "Anyway... Dream said with them having their truce that can wait. We went looking for you in the hopes you got answers for Dream."
Reaper pauses and clearly thinks it over "I personally don't... but if anyone has answers..." he looks considering to the side "I can go ask a friend of mine first. See if she has answers. if she doesn't we will need to go to Asgore, king of the gods and god of the sky... he will probably know but..." reaper pulls a face "he doesn't like multiverse stuff generally..." Reaper looks over "You two okay with waiting here for a moment?"
Both dream and Blue nod and take a seat to wait again. Reaper disappears and silence returns.
In the end, Reaper's friend did not have answers and they were forced to go to the land of the gods, or universe of the gods. Which, caused a tiny issue with Blue being there. Blue had just looked at him and asked if Dream wanted him to come. To which Dream had said obviously and so now Blue was Dream's chosen warrior to hopefully let this go smoothly.
They manage to get into the universe and it is glorious beyond anything that Dream could imagine. it is bright and colourful and so many powerful beings make their ways around. They all look curiously at them as they go by.
Reaper whispers "Do make sure to just address me with Sans here. Either that of Death. They don't like the idea that I as god don't go by my name or title when I am making my way around." Blue nods as Dream gives his own agreement.
They manage to get to the hall of gods and find the Asgore of this universe. the kind of all gods and the very sky. Which, with Dream knowing the story and how the monsters longed for the sky and all it held, understands is a very big deal.
They arrive to the end of the hall and Reaper nods to Asgore "Asgore."
Asgore looks over and frowns "Death, I thought I told you what i thought about this interacting with mortals." he looks very displeased.
Reaper answers smoothly "I know, Dream however isn't a mortal. He is a god, just not from our universe. The mortal with him is his chosen warrior Blue."
Asgore huffs but the irritations melt away easily "I see..." he smiles at Dream "Dream you say? You must still be very new to godhood. I can only assume Death brought you to me for a specific reason."
Dream gives a slow nod and after an encouraging smile of Blue he starts talking "I supose I am still a bit new to this all. I may be over 500 years but many of those years were spend locked away. The problem is... I am losing my magic and powers. I do not understand why."
Asgore frowns as he nods "I see. Were you cursed by any chance?"
Dream thinks it over "I don't think so. I at least don't remember a single moment which stands out where i could have been cursed."
Asgore nods and waves at him to continue.
Dream does just that "I have been losing my powers slowly over the last few months. It started with being unable to passively make others happy. At this point I can hardly feel emotions as it is."
Asgore suddenly chuckles as he leans back "Well, of course you can't do that. You are no god of emotions."
Dead silence. Blue and Reaper share a shocked look as Dream sputters "but I am?! I am the god of positive emotions!"
Asgore tilts his head "No you are not. I can sense that you have no domain."
Dream sputters and glares "But I do have a domein!"
Asgore chuckles as he waves off his anger "Had. You HAD a domain."
Dream feels hismelf freeze "what...?"
Asgore nods "You are losing your powers because you lost your domain. You aren't losing your godhood however, that is something of that is yours by right of birth and a great power is needed to take that from you. But your powers are leaving you as those were connected to the domain you were connected to."
Dream stares down at the ground.
Asgore continues on, either unaware of the actual crisis Dream is experiencing or he just doesn't care "Now that the balance is able to establish itself again it has no need for either you or your counterpart."
Dream blinks and looks up "Balance?"
Asgore looks smug "Yes of course I know what your domain used to be. A god of Balance. together with your counterpart your duty is to establish and keep balance over your area. In this case, the focus was on emotions and the area was quite large with this so called multiverse."
Dream is seconds away from hyperventilating.
"Remember Dream. You are to keep balance." Nim sounds so proud.
Oh gods.
Nightmare looking at him annoyed "Dream what are you doing?! You are going to tip over the balance if you keep interrupting my work!"
Oh no.
"-It doesn't mean i don't like them. Just, even too much of a good thing is bad. you know?" Blue smiles at him.
Oh he is so dumb.
Reaper luckily sees that he needs some assistance and continues the question "Meaning that Dream needs a new domain? And that will give him powers again?"
Asgore nods "Indeed."
Blue looks between them confused "But what restored this balance then?"
Asgore looks annoyed at Blue for a moment but when Dream looks at him expecting he humors them "I do not know. I supose something unbalanced it. But that with time and the suport you and your counterpart gave it it managed to recover and heal."
So there may be a new tree of emotions somewhere in the multiverse-
WAIT!
Dream steps forwards, feeling much more panicked "You mean. That whatever unbalanced it must have been reversed?!"
Asgore raises a brow "I just said that yes."
Dream feels the panic return. Because the only thing he can image unbalancing it. Would have been the tree being cut down. The tree and the apples of his mother's tree had been the thing keeping balance.
Nightmare ate the apples...
Where is his twin?
Dream takes a few steps backwards "I... I need to go. Thank you. I need to go now." His brother. Where is his twin? Is he hurt? What if... what if these powers disappearing are also disappearing for him?
Those apples had healed him... kept him alive...
Dream knows that much, Dream had seen the images in the book. The only reason Nightmare survived was because of those apples.
Can... can Nightmare survive without those apples in his system?!
Dream doens't know what Asgore said but he rushes back to the enterance, blue already by his side again and looking worried.
They get to the edge and Dream teleports them out again.
As soon as they are back Dream feels himself shake and Blue hugs him "What is wrong? What did you realise?"
Moments later Reaper appears "Why did you do that?! Now i need to deal with a ticked off Asgore and-"
Dream breaks "Nightmare may be dying!" sobs break through as he collapses in Blue's hold.
silence.
Dream hadn't seen his brother in months. Not once ever since Dream started losing his powers. He had only seen the gang members once in a while. They always left quickly as soon as Dream even started talking about Nightmare.
Dream had been losing his powers and magic for half a year now and not once did he question if it may be affecting Nightmare.
He sobs as he falls to his knees, Blue keeps holding him.
Reaper floats closer but still out of reach "What do you mean? He is also a god. those are hard to kill." he grins a tiny bit but there is a nervous edge to it.
Dream sobs as he looks up. "The only reason he is alive is because he ate the very thing that helped keep the balance..." he sobs again "if the balance is restored... and all the magic we have connected to it disappears..."
Reaper seems to realise what Dream realised before cursing "Fuck."
Dream sobs as he hugs himself.
He doesn't even know where Nightmare is. He should have started looking for him months and months ago. As soon as he found that storybook, earlier even! When he realised his powers were acting weird. Make amends.
But Dream had been a coward. He had been afraid that Nightmare would never forgive him for his foolish and blind behaviour. Dream had figured he could try and ease their relationship a bit first. Maybe a truce like Ink and Error, and work from there on trying to repair their broken relationship.
But turns out... He may have been too late already.
Half a year too late.
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Why is it that each time i do a Dream chapter it is a gutpunch? I honestly really like dream. It is just, from his side this whole story is more of a horror story than a family comedy...
Oh well.
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