#just sam and kaidan things

[swaps55]

Silver

Morning sun cuts through the small, circular bathroom window and spills onto the bedroom floor, bright enough Kaidan thought they’d left the light on overnight. But when he rolls out of bed and pads over to the open door, rubbing sleep out of his eyes, it’s just the sunlight and Shepard scowling in front of the mirror, towel slung low on his hips as he leans in to examine something on his chin.

They have nowhere to be until tomorrow, when they have to head into Vancouver to greet Jack’s latest field trip of Grissom biotics for a weekend stay at the orchard. In fact, Kaidan distinctly remembers a conversation yesterday afternoon about lounging in bed this morning to enjoy some peace before the madness descends. Yet here Shepard is, awake before the alarm Kaidan had turned off, ready to take the day head on.

Some things never change.   

“Morning,” Kaidan says, leaning against the doorframe to take in the sight with a soft smile.

Shepard grunts in response, tilting his neck and practically pressing his face against the mirror while scrubbing a thumb across the stubble on his cheek. Sometimes, if the light hits it right, Kaidan can still see the ghostly white lines of the Lazarus scarring. But as more years go by, they’re harder and harder to see.

Time does heal, he supposes.

“Something wrong?” Kaidan asks.

Shepard presses and pulls at the skin over his lip before finally glancing over his shoulder at Kaidan in the doorway. The way his gaze lingers for a moment over Kaidan’s bare chest still sends a delighted shiver down his spine.

“Being rudely reminded of the passage of time,” he grumbles, then points to his chin. “I think I have a grey hair.”

Kaidan heart clutches unexpectedly, the way it used to do over and over in the days, weeks, hell, months after the final push. Memories that feel distant except in moments like this whisper in his ear.

(I’ll be fine.)

(I can’t lose you again.)

(We both know this is goodbye.)

He draws in a sharp breath, sharp enough that Shepard’s irritation vanishes in a heartbeat.

“What is it?” Shepard asks.

Kaidan takes in the lean but softening muscle of Shepard’s chest, the deepening laugh lines around his eyes, the soft brush of silver that’s not just in his stubble – it’s in his temples, too, now that Kaidan’s looking.

“Nothing,” he says, swallowing around the lump in his throat. “Just…something I never thought I’d get to see.”    

[quicksilverdrabbles]

Sam Guevenne: How would you like to have a drinking contest to win a staff?

Merlyn: A staff? *excited, loves staffs* Sign me up!

Kaidan: Aye, I'll participate.

Inigo: I want to play!

Lucien: Compete, you mean. I think I'll be sitting this one out, if you don't mind.

Khash: I wanna-

Caryalind: Absolutely not.

Taliesin: This is a horrible idea.

Xelzaz: Agreed.

~One wild goose chase later~

Merlyn: *pissed, covered in goat fur and hagraven feathers* GUEVENNE! GIVE ME MY GODS DAMNED STAFF ALREADY!

Sanguine: Ah, you're here. Allow me to-

Merlyn: *yanks him down to her eye level* Give me the fucking staff.

Sanguine: I- damn alright.

Merlyn: ... This is just a lesser dremora staff.

Sanguine: Have fun with it! Hahaha

Merlyn: YOU FUCKING-

Taliesin: So not only did she not check what they would be drinking for the competition, but she didn't check the quality of the staff either?

Xelzaz: .. It appears so.

Taliesin: ... Why do I travel with you idiots???

Merlyn: I COULD HAVE CONJURED TEN DREMORA IN THE TIME IT TOOK ME TO GET HERE!

Xelzaz: *sighing* I question the same thing, sometimes.

[deannastrois]

Aerti unchau, ashkaidan stargate, and chlodine fake date pls!

aerti unchau is in fact an aerith/tifa uncharted au I came up with with @edains like four years ago (haha what is time...) in this au tifa worked with barret to steal artifacts and return them to their rightful land but I as putting her more in the elena type role of uncharted and then aerith showed up as the last survivor from a place that had been ransacked years ago looking for the team to get her things back, so really less uncharted more generic but it started as an uncharted idea

"I can't really see you firing a gun." Tifa said, her voice low. "I can, Tseng taught me." Aerith laughed, her giggling echoing in the quiet van. She put a hand over her mouth and whispers an apology to Barret who grunted and went back to sleep."Not that I love doing it." Aerith said in a stage whisper to Tifa, leaning in across the way to talk to her. "Oh." Tifa replied, taken aback. "Is it...were you..." She faltered with her words and trying to find the right thing to say. Aerith smiled at her but for once it didn't meet her eyes. "It wasn't by choice. But! I can still take people in a fight." She winked at Tifa. "And I'm willing to fight for my peoples things. They've been gone for too long." "We'll get them back," Tifa promised, hoping beyond everything she could keep that promise, "And then we'll make Cloud carry them all back for us." Aerith giggled again and this time her smile was genuine. "The perfect pack mule."

ashkaidan stargate is also what it says on the lid where they're on a stargate team with shep as the leader and the rest of the me1 squad, and then me2 squad was it's own group, and me3 squad. legion was like a replicator style machine in this universe and tali was from the race that built the replicators but I never got around to writing that point in the story I just really liked it.

Ashley was fairly certain she could time how long the gate took to dial a planet to a T in her head. She'd seen it well over a hundred times but when the last connection was made and the gate whooshed open with a brilliant flash of blue and white it always made the breath catch in her throat. She shifted slightly, trying to get rid of some of excitement and nervous energy that always came with the start of a mission and traveling to a new world. The M.A.L.P. had shown them that this world would be covered in ice and snow though it shouldn't have been given the planets location to the sun. Kaidan nudged her as Shepard did one last inventory check before they left. "You sure you ready for this one Gunnery? If it gets to cold let me know, I've got a trick or two to keep war." Kaidan teased. Ashley rolled her eyes. "It doesn't get that cold up in Vancouver LT, don't act like you're the expert here. Just make sure your mom packed your sweater." She shot back and began walking up the plank to the gate on Shepard's signal. "That was one time." She heard Kaidan mutter behind her and tried to stiffle a laugh. She wasn't laughing by the time the cold hit her face, instantly making her eyes water. She scrambled to put on the glasses she should have before entering the gate. "Sure you don't need help?" Kaidan asked, his voice coming in her ear over the comms. Whatever response she was going to come up with was killed when Shepard held up her hand to signal for them to cut the chatter. "We're not alone, team."

chlodine fake dating is again what is says on the tin, these two start dating mostly to troll nate and sam and whoops it's real

Sam stared down at their joined hands and then back up at Nadine and Chloe. "No." He said. "Oh yes." Nadine gave him a sharp grin in reply. Chloe tried not to laugh at Sam's face of utter incredulity. "Something wrong Sam?" Chloe asked, as casual as she could. "You don't get more of a cut for being a couple." Sam finally huffed, crossing his arms. "Now hang on, that wasn't on the table. But it could be." Chloe let go of Nadine's hand and shook off the sudden chill as smoothly as possibly. "Let's talk number." Nadine turned her face, dropping her head onto Chloe's shoulder and making it look like she was either telling her sweet nothings or how to get a larger cut of the loot to Sam. In reality Chloe could feel more than hear Nadine's muffled laughter.

[urrone]

20 fanfic questions

Tagged by @swaps55 (thank yooooou)

Tagging: do you wanna do it? man just do it. have fun. go ham.

How many works do you have on AO3?

26

2. What's your total AO3 words count?

216,983

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently? It's mostly Dragon Age and Mass Effect, but I've also written hockey rpf, popslash (which is not included in the works count or the word count), Supernatural, SPN RPF, LotR, the Hunger Games, and Julie and the Phantoms.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

What Remains - SPN, Dean goes missing, Sam tries to find him

Shape I'm In - hockey RPF, Tyler takes a hard hit during a game, Jamie gets in a fight, this is the aftermath

Never Lived a Time Better Spent in Love - hockey RPF, Sid/Geno many years down the line, adopt a baby together

Actually, Plenty - SPN, a coda to What Remains set 15 years after that story

Everything Changes, Everything Stays the Same - SPN, Sam rescues Dean from hell, things change for them after that

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Always, I've had people comment about the fact that I'm still responding to comments on fifteen year old fic. If you're going to read and take the time to comment, I'm gonna say thank you. Plus, community is the best part of fandom, how can you have community if you're not talking?

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh it's for sure lathbora viran which is the only story I've written that I had to tag "no happy ending." Although honestly swaps would probably say that For a Single Yesterday was also pretty fuckin' angsty. But Kaidan finds peace, my poor inquisitor absolutely did not.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably my Julie and the Phantoms fic, gravity, though I did absolutely take people through the ringer first.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

When I first got into hockey I ended up on the anon hate list for a hot minute because it was obvious from the first fic I posted that I didn't know anything about hockey because, well, I didn't. I'd never watched it before I got involved in the fandom. So it was valid criticism even if it was mean spirited.

9. Do you write smut. If so what kind?

The smuttiest thing I've ever written is a PWP threesome for the Oilers boys called Hold You Down. I enjoy reading smut but as a noted ace I feel awkward as fuck about writing it.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Yes. Crazy is such a subjective word, but I've written the hockey dudes into the Pacific Rim world and I fixed the shit about the Pac Rim world that never really made sense. I had a much more in depth story plotted out but I lost steam on writing RPF.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I've ever been told?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, but that fic is no longer online.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Twice. I had fun both times but prefer to set my own pace through a fic.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

I don't really have an all time to write, they're all my favorites.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I still feel very guilty about a popslash WIP that I know will never be finished.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Pretty prose.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I try to avoid writing action sequences because I have no idea how to make them sound cool.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

If I can have a native speaker assist, yes. If I have to run it through google translate, absolutely not.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I was writing extra scenes into the Princess Bride when I was 12 years old.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Idk, they're all my children. I love them all equally. I think in general I'm most proud of the Julie and the Phantoms fic, because I just really feel like I nailed the thesis of it, because I had a thesis, and it wasn't just "a meets b and they fall in love." (Which isn't a diss, this is what I usually write, that fic was just different.) But yeah, they're all my favorite. YOU tell ME which your favorite is.

[bigfan-fanfic]

How would Kaidan, Cullen,Bucky and Sammy react to a bf with an extremely low sex drive? ( It's not that i hate sex or something, it's just because the hormone that is suppose make me horny is less than half of the minimum[ unfortunately my doc said there's nothing I can do to improve it besides sports and eat healthier, but even If I do all of it it won't reach the minimum] 😭)

Important note: sex drive is a nonclinical term that does not have a medical basis. There is no "normal" sex drive - the only issue you have is the hormonal imbalance. People whose hormones are in acceptable levels run the gamut between wanting sex a lot or not really wanting it often at all, or even being asexual and sex-repulsed. Even if your hormone balance reaches normal levels, there's no guarantee that that'd mean you'd desire sex more.

In any case, libido is influenced by a number of factors, and maybe it's my own sexuality influencing my ideas, but most characters I don't see having a particularly high or hypersexual libido - apart from those in canon who tend to have or mention desire for lots of sex, like, say, Wolverine or Dean Winchester or Constantine.

Kaidan has a sex drive that's not particularly high or low, but he doesn't see a need to bother his partner about it - he doesn't mind a partner with a low sex drive, primarily because he's got an ability to communicate within a relationship and discuss these things like a well-adjusted human being.

Cullen, with his withdrawals from lyrium and his general stressful lifestyle, either doesn't have a lot of time or not a lot of desire. However when he does feel it, it's very strong - the poor guy's libido is all out of whack. However, I do believe that by Inquisition, the man has finally gotten over his hangups about self-pleasure and is thus a lot less concerned about sex in general.

Bucky has a very low sex drive. It's not that he never wants it or that he's asexual, it's just that he sometimes physically can't perform or doesn't want to. He sometimes blames this on HYDRA, but honestly he's never been particularly keyed up for sex. His dates back in the forties and thirties weren't so much womanizing as playing the role society expected while also enjoying the company of them.

Sam has a really messed-up understanding from sex that comes from Dean and their dad. Jess really did the work of a saint sorting that man out - I imagine he didn't want to disappoint and suddenly started acting like them and immediately she got turned off and maybe even bopped him on the head for that. Still, Sam places a lot of importance on sex in a relationship, as his emotional constipation means it's one of the only ways he knows how to express romantic affection. It'll mean work from both of you to get him to understand it's not about him.

[crqstalite]

Okay, so if you wanna be asked about your OCs, I am gonna ask about your OCs. What's your Ryder's (whichever one you like or both) favorite color? What's their favorite style? Like, if they don't have to wear Initiative clothes, what do they wear? Why did they train to become the class that they are?

Ooo, great questions!

Talis' favorite color is a dusky pink, akin to the sunrise. Occasionally some orange as well, considering her current hair color.

Mateo's favorite color is probably closer to an ocean blue. Lot of greens and blues on this boy.

Also fashion is an awesome question because the fashion in the OT and in Andromeda both make me incredibly sad. SO --

Talis' style includes pieces like this, this, or possibly that. I cannot google what I'm thinking of, so eventually I'll have to do an outfit sheet for her. She's very much Big Pant Little Shirt in my mind though -- anything that lets her stay active in her casual clothing, so our idea of techwear I think. Most of it is in this same pink/red palette though, so I like to think bright colors fit in with the Andromeda atmosphere. Mateo alludes me on the best of days though. Arguably something similar, but a little more rugged + jackets, always. He is is constantly somewhere he's not supposed to be and usually this means he's freezing.

(rubs hands together) This is where it gets long btw --

So! It's my canon that both of the Ryder twins are inherently biotic, like both are implanted and will always have rudimentary capability to use their biotic abilities. However, active-as-always Mateo is canonically a sentinel/infiltrator whereas sciency-and-analysis Talis is canonically a vanguard.

Talis trained as such because it fascinated her. Having such fine control over her own nervous system was the pinnacle of being a scientist. She'd run so many tests in the Alliance gym with varying results, but she got incredibly good at it. She knew where her body would be before she moved, her brain could almost work fast enough to make miniscule changes in-motion, y'know, a-la-sandevistan-from-cyberpunk-edgerunners. She and Ellen would work together on it, fine tuning her mnemonics and pushing and pulling at her body. Talis has incredibly fine control over biotics as well, capable of picking up small objects or affecting them with her mass distortion. She blinks in and out of where she needs to be, and puts on a hell of a lightshow when she gets in close on someone -- yet her surroundings remain largely untouched if that's what she's gunning for. Given biotics were still such an unknown in the Milky Way that while she was a Ryder, there was still some prejudice against her when she enlisted. Before Alec's plans went south, she was slated to be part of Kaidan's team as a student after she finished university. She resents Alec for this, watching the opportunity dissolve before her not too soon after. While Alec always appreciated Ellen's work, something about his daughter being capable of moving mass beyond his own understanding never quite clicked for him. That part of her he just never understood.

[And I also headcanon while he was shown using biotics-ish during Habitat 7, it wasn't actually biotics and a rudimentary recreation of it using SAM. He wasn't a biotic and couldn't relate to his daughter who leaned so heavily on it.]

Mateo however never lead with his biotics. No accident, no previous trauma, he just preferred to be without. He didn't have the mind for science needed to finetune his abilities on his own, and simply didn't show the same aptitude his sister did. So combining his interest with cross-species military history, he instead incorporated strategies from other races and jailbroke the hell out of his omni-tool to allow him to do and hack all sorts of things. It allowed him to put his weapon mastery to work at least, with less focus on mnemonics and more on skill with his trusty Viper. But if Alec's opinion didn't affect this, and it wasn't one of the few things that they related on when he was around, who knows what class Mateo would have trained in? Alec's approval when he topped charts in his unit for best shot in basic probably is what kept him going. All his little comments about never quite getting SAM's profiles to work like Talis' and some disapproval of it when he thought he was being quiet (or even in their arguments) probably had a massive hand in Mateo deciding to at least be what Alec wanted. He has the warp/overload combo down pat anyway -- makes him a special kind of deadly when no one sees him coming.

Both of them specialize in hand-to-hand combat though. They have very similar builds too, definitely stockier people who aren't super afraid to throw their weight around. Mateo is a little more nimble than his sister though, especially when using his cloaking device. He also was the one who actually took classes prior to enlistment, so his strategies are significantly easier to predict but harder to dodge. Talis didn't, so while she has basic training, she also makes things up on the fly. Whatever works in the moment, and she just keeps pushing no matter what.

(Talis is also more likely to be able to take a punch. She has a stupid amount of bruises to prove it and Lexi thinks she's going the Asari version of grey)

Thank you for asking!!

[tealenko]

For the WIP game

Ch. 11 Catania

And Ch. 7 In the Wrong Place at the Wrong Time

Yaaaasssss!!

thanks for asking <3 <3 <3

Listen Before I Go - ch. 11 Catania

Basically my Shepard and my Ryder becoming besties the first night they meet (pre ME1)

“By the way, is she pretty?” “Ay… Give me patience.” She pleads to no one in particular. “I wonder what I did in my previous life to deserve this…”   “That doesn’t answer my question.” “I’m not interested, Van…” “And who’s talking about you?” “Ah…” Shepard laughs “Well then… If that’s the case…” “So… What’s the verdict?(rev)” “Drop dead gorgeous.”

Didn't Have the Heart - ch. 7 In the Wrong Place at the Wrong Time

Yay~~ this one is almost finished (just need to tie some things and write the ending) and it's about Traynor saying how much she loves Shepard in front of Vega and Kaidan without having any idea that this is a shenko fic lol (because I have no mercy for the poor thing XDDDDD) Oh, and she and Kaidan play chess! (ME3)

Vega: Erm, Sam… I don’t think Lola is into chicks.  *Kaidan goes into: kill me truck mode* Traynor: Are you sure? Vega: Are we sure, jefe? *Kaidan chokes and almost dies*  //God help me cause I don’t know how I’m gonna do the rest lol

[colesmurf23]

(OC) Valentina The Yoshi

Bio: Valentina Yoshi

Name: Valentina

Nickname: Heart Yoshi

Age: 27

Sexuality: Bisexual

Birthday: February 14th

Species: Yoshi

Relationship/Wife: Sunny

Family Members: Valentino (Son) Sumner (Son) Valencia (Daughter) Sundari (Daughter) Sunrise (Daughter) Valentim (Son) Sunni (Daughter) Valen (Son) Valens (Son) Sunna (Daughter) Kailer (Brother in law) Kaydin (Nephew) Kevon (Nephew) Kenyon (Nephew) Kathyanne (Niece) Kara (Niece) Kora (Niece) Kailey (Niece) Kraig (Nephew) Krissy (Niece) Kaidan (Nephew) Kaiala (Niece) Kailan (Nephew) Katania (Niece) Kysha (Niece) Kathary (Younger Niece) Kalu (Youngest Nephew) Kaloosh (Adopted Niece) Kanu (Adopted Nephew) Oliver (Brother in law) Scarlet (Sister in law) Olva (Sister in law)

Personality: Fun,Sweet, Caring, Positive, Peace,Jubilant. and Smart

Friends: Snappy Smurfling Nat Smurfling Farmer Smurf Baby Smurf Naomi (Winged Pikmin) Pearle (Best Friend) Pipland (2nd Best Friend) Coraline (3rd Best Friend) Jolie Samia Posia (My bestie's oc and 4th best friend) Eloura (My bestie's oc) Henry (My bestie's oc) Beatrix (My bestie's oc and 5th best friend) Louise (My bestie's oc and 6th best friend) Kadin (Our oc and 7th best friend) Sheryl (Our oc and 8th best friend) Patricia (Our oc and 9th best friend) Unity (Our oc) Stacey (Our oc) Forest Trinitey Laurence (My bestie's oc) Brizelle (Our oc) Sam (Our oc)

Favorite Color: Rose

Favorite Season: Winter

Favorite Holiday: Valentines Day

Fun Fact: Valentina is name after Valentines Day. Valentina can be quite a fun yoshi. She love having fun. She mostly have fun with her kids and nieces and nephews. She may have a mind of a child. But she still take care of them. Even her wife doesn't mind her having a mind of a child. That's why she is fun to have around. She may have a mind of a child. But she is very sweet. She is also very sweet to all the kids. Even if they are bad. She doesn't mind at all. She is very caring, when she see someone is hurt. like scratch. She is always prepare. to make it all better. She does carry a first aid kit with her all times. She also love going on vacations. She one day wants to go visit The Bahamas. She love sandy beaches and hanging out in the sun. She make love winter, but she also love the sun. It's her dream. She is always positive. She may have a mind of a child. But she can be positive, pretty much all the time. She doesn't worry so much, because she always wanna keep things positive. So it doesn't stress her out. She is very peaceful, she doesn't like to see things go downhill. She'll do anything to keep everyone at peace. Especially her family. She also wants to bring peace in all the yoshi islands. She is always happy, as a mind of a child. She is always happy. And express her feelings to people she care about. Because how jubilant she is. She also really doesn't like valents either. It makes her kinda scared or worried. She may have a mind of a child, but she is very smart. She doesn't show it. But she is very smart. she can do puzzles in just 2 hours. As for everyone else, longer.

Valentina belong to: me

Yoshi Species: Nintendo

yoshi #yoshioc #yoshifanart #yoshimario #yoshinintendo #yoshi #yoshifanart #yoshimario #fanartdigital #fanartdigitalart #fanart #fanartvideogames

[partenopae]

I think you were into mass effect once? Imma request Kaidan Alenko

YES i love mass effect and especially kaidan

[commander-krios]

Fanfiction Recs 2022

I’ve read a bunch of fabulous fics so far this year and I wanted to shout them out since we are past the halfway point for 2022. Some are old, some are new, some are finished, and others are still active. Under a read more because of length. 

I am reading some others fics currently so I’ll probably have another post later in the year for the others I enjoyed.

HEAVY FIRE by @spicyshimmy

Rating: M Pairing: mShenko Summary:  Actually based on the merc!Shepard and Spectre!Alenko prompt on the kinkmeme. Earthborn Shepard never makes it into the Alliance. Merc life suits him just fine, as does teaming up with C-Sec officer Garrus Vakarian every now and then. And then he meets Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko, poster boy for doing things by the books. It’d been a long day, but at least Garrus was buying.

Cantata by @swaps55

Rating: M Pairing: Pre-mShenko Summary: Whatever Kaidan had been expecting from the Butcher of Torfan, this isn’t it.There’s nothing krogan-like about the soldier sitting at the table. The lethal gaze from the vids is watery and unfocused. The empty bottle in his hand isn’t a gun, but he clutches it like one. When the bartender delivers a fresh one Shepard doesn’t look up, merely pops the top off and takes another quick pull.This isn’t good. ~Sam Shepard and Kaidan Alenko, in the years before the Normandy. AKA, the slowest of slow burns.

Encroachment by @n0rmandysr1

Rating: T Pairing: FemShepley Summary:  If Emilia Shepard had known what was waiting for her aboard the SSV Normandy, she might have never walked through the airlock. But for all the struggles ahead, she has a good ship and a good crew. ME1, Paragade Shepard. Multiple character POVs, expanded minor crew and a focus on the off-camera moments. Slowburn f!Shepley.

Sucker’s Luck by @hanarinhightown

Rating: M Pairing: Garrus Vakarian x Lantar Sidonis Summary: Exploring Garrus’ unhealthy relationship with obsession and black/white thinking. Beginning with his time on Omega as he struggles to come to terms with his past, his growing anxiety, his grief about losing Shepard, and how intertwined his relationship to her was with his obsession with Saren. He knows he’s behaving recklessly but if he is going to throw his life away, he can make it mean something. He’s done living his life for himself, but too proud to throw it away for himself either.

Enter Sidonis. The story of Archangel: Angst, ambition, love, betrayal, revenge, forgiveness, acceptance, and the grey spaces in between.

Building off of Mass Effect: Homeworlds #3, story starts on Omega and builds through the plots of Mass Effect 2 and 3. Garrus x Sidonis. Will update tags as they become relevant.

Collide by @mallaidhsomo

Rating: E Pairing: Ashley Williams/Kaidan Alenko Summary:  Ashley and Kaidan's domestic bubble on Horizon is burst. Ashley sees a ghost.

Orbit by @eluvisen

Rating: T Pairing: Female Revan/Carth Onasi Summary: A series of moments in Carth and Velire’s relationship as they’re thrown together by forces beyond their control.

this madness of the heart by @sleepswithvillains

Rating: E Pairing: Female Sith Warrior/Malavai Quinn Summary: Malavai Quinn grew up on stories about serving the Sith. He devoured the great literary epics about the Force-blind soldier, being taken into the service of a Sith Lord. The hero falls to his knees, professes his devotion, pledges his service—and after he proves himself worthy, the Sith takes him into their home, under their protection—a treasured companion, a trusted ally.But he knew now how that story really ended.

He’d knelt on the filthy floor of the Balmorran spaceport and pledged himself to a Sith’s service—earnestly, half feeling like he’d walked out an epic poem himself—and look where that had gotten him. He’d been mocked, belittled—and his service had been cast aside as worthless. For three years, he dedicated nearly every waking minute of his life to the success of both Lord Baras and the Sith warrior, and all it had yielded was forty-seven pieces of shrapnel from his knee to his hip.And now, at forty-one, he finds himself in dire financial straights—with no choice but to enter an arranged marriage in the hopes of saving his family's estate. When a young, rising Sith Lord makes an offer he can't afford to refuse, he has no choice but to accept—no matter how many terrifying rumors surround her.

Regarding Red by @kalliesa

Rating: M Pairing: Female Shepard/Garrus Vakarian Summary:  Aria has hired an interesting new enforcer; a human soldier with no memory. She is skilled in combat and infiltration, and has a hunger to eradicate the evil from Omega. Archangel has a similar mission. Can they work together? Or will they just get in each other's way?

The End Is Where We Begin by @shadoedseptmbr & @nightmarestudio606​

Rating: E Pairing: Female Shepard/Male Shepard Summary: People meet and paths cross all the time, but in her experience, they don't always intersect again. So when they do and this Mark fella is in her crosshairs again, Aedan Shepard is curious to see what will come of it in the end.

A Hundred Battlefields by @iberiandoctor​

Rating: M Pairing: mShenko Summary: Through the ages, in different lives, they’d fought by each other’s sides, and died in each other’s arms, on a hundred battlefields before this one.

The Shepard’s Dog by @cryptid-jack​

Rating: M Pairing: mShenko Summary: Devastated and suffering a bad case of survivor's guilt after the destruction of the SR1, Kaidan is offered a chance at redemption when Liara reaches out for his help to recover Shepard's body. When Cerberus claims they can bring the commander back, Kaidan and Liara agree to hand him over on one condition: Kaidan goes with them to keep watch over Shepard while they work.

[trashquisitor-shirozora]

The "I Can 'Pin' Posts on Tumblr Now? Since When?" Intro/Masterpost

Greetings and welcome to the "Who The Fuck Am I?" post written by yours truly, whoever the fuck I am. Now that I'm back on my Fandom bullshit again in at least 2 blogs, I thought I'd re-introduce myself.

I am 2nd gen Korean-American on the Best West Coast. I ID as she/they/shiro, and ace/demi. I'm in the millennial bracket (aka, I am a Legal Adult) so be mindful when interacting with me. I do what I can to be antiracist and am always learning to be better.

I am some iteration of "shirozora" on: LiveJournal, Dreamwidth, AO3, Tumblr, Twitter, Instagram, Discord. My first Fandom 2.0 was political/pundit RPF and my first fandom fallout was Racefail '09, so you could say I've Seen Some Shit. Been 5+ years since I last engaged in actual Fandom, yet here the fuck I am.

Fandoms I have written/drawn for (FFN years do not count, I purged that account): political/pundit RPF, Supernatural, Tron: Legacy, MCU, Star Trek (AOS), Dragon Age, Mass Effect, Final Fantasy XIV, Star Wars/The Mandalorian

A Short List Of Things I Wrote in No Particular Order:

Lost Symphony (T): SPN; Dean/Cassie, Sam/Jessica, pre-Dean/Castiel; for the Racebending Revenge challenge - "Mary Ahn Winchester died on the ceiling of the nursery on November 2, 1983."

We Are Pilots (T+): Tron: Legacy; Sam/Tron; for the Tron Kink Meme - "Six months and Sam still can't shake off his father's ghost, so Quorra suggests returning to the Grid to find the answers he needs to move on."

Wishing Well (T): Captain America: The First Avenger; Steve/Howard, Steve/Peggy, unfulfilled Howard/Peggy/Steve; for the Cap Kink Meme - "And you just wanna feel like a coin that's been tossed / In a wishing well, a wishing well."

A Thousand Eyes Staring Back (T+): Mass Effect 2; Kaiden/m!Shep - "His problems start at Horizon, aka that time Kaidan Alenko was having a really bad day and his former CO was supposed to be dead."

Waking Ghosts (T+): Dragon Age; Dorian Pavus/Male Trevelyan Inquisitor; the Mummy (1999) AU nobody asked for - "Dorian Pavus, formerly of Qarinus, is an archivist at the Magisterium research outpost in Hightown."

Seasons Change (T): Black Panther/MCU; M'Baku/T'Challa - "A fisherman finds a dying king in his nets and Hanuman offers M'Baku an opportunity to repay T'Challa for sparing his life at Warrior Falls."

born in a thunderstorm (T+): Star Trek: AOS, Captain Marvel, Thor: Ragnarok, Guardians of the Galaxy; Kirk/McCoy; the worst AU I ever wrote - "Kevin Riley insists that James Kirk didn't die on Tarsus IV. Nobody believes him."

Dangerous Dreams series (T) - The Storm; The Suns; Between Planets: Star Wars/The Mandalorian; Din/Luke; the reason why I'm writing this post - "To want something for yourself, that is a dangerous dream."

I cross-post and occasionally write about writing at @shirozora-writes. But I bet a bunch of y'all stumbled into my little sandbox through @shirozora-draws, so let's talk about that!

I suffered from artist's block for almost 4 years. That ended when I became utterly fixated on "So Grogu has two dads now - oh no." I fucking ragequit Star Wars after the fucking world lied to me about The Last Jedi* and now I'm doing the most insane and involved fanworks because of Star Wars. The fuck???

To end this unapologetically long-ass Intro Post, here are my 3 favorite recent doodles:

The original post is here. First time animating with Clip Studio Paint and I had a two-day meltdown over it.

The original post is here. Fun fact: the file name is "homoerotic chin tilt yolo". Also, 6.4k notes? You guys are wild.

The original post is here. The final illustration from The Suns.

*I hate The Last Jedi the most not just because it's racist sexist garbage that trashed everyone except Kylo Ren whoever the fuck he thinks he is, and jumpstarted some of the most toxic fandom behavior I had the displeasure of witnessing, but also because I read so much praise for it before walking into the theater, paying for a ticket with my own money, and realizing 5 minutes into the film that I was gonna have the worst time of my life. I can't and probably will never watch Knives Out because I still haven't forgiven the director for the psychological damage. This is 100% a TLJ Hate Zone.

[swaps55]

After I read your latest Mezzo chapter (Chef’s kiss!) I started another reread of the whole series. (The fifth? Sixth? I lost track ^^) Anyway, I just came across the “MSV Fleur de Lis” incident that ends in Wong being expelled from the team and consists of one of the few (if not the only) glimpses we get on how Sam is around children.

Not for the first time I thought about your take on whether or not he and Kaidan will be having kids in the future. I can totally relate to Kaidan’s way of thinking - not wanting to “burden” Sam with another responsibility but making it possible for him to live a life just for himself. And nobody else.

I was wondering - do you think they’ll talk about this? Is that a decision they make together? Or is it just Kaidan who decides for the both of them without actually telling Sam? Will that ever be a topic? What would Sam do if he realizes at one point that Kaidan gave something up for him? Assuming Kaidan would like to have kids ..

This is a really excellent question with a complicated answer because their writer makes it complicated. Kids are unfortunately a very sensitive subject for me to write about (this question is absolutely fine or I wouldn't have answered it), so in essence I am making this decision for them and backing into why it's in character, because a life with kids is not something I can write about.

I'm saying this mostly to give a peek into some of the writing process. Especially in fanfic, where events and decisions and character beats can come predefined, sometimes the question you have to ask yourself isn't "how does this character respond to X," it's "this character responded to X with Y, why did that happen?" In this case I am defining the character response to this question because it's a boundary for me, but now it's my job as the writer to make sure that decision feels in character.

Anyway - do Sam and Kaidan talk about this decision? Probably, even if it doesn't wind up on the page. You're right - Sam is good with kids. I wanted that glimpse you get in Cantata to show that. There's a Cantata-era story I really, really want to find the time to write that is based around the thought that sometimes we become the people we needed when we were young. I think part off the reason Sam is good with kids comes from the fact that he grew up with an inattentive, distant parent, so he gives kids his full attention. Also, he had an interrupted childhood. There's a part of him that didn't get to be a kid, so kids bring out the kid in him that never got to be.

But I do think the fact he is so much like his mother would scare him when it comes to the possibility of parenthood. He might bring up kids thinking that it's something Kaidan might want, and Sam's a giver. But he'd probably feel a lot trepidation over the suggestion, and relief when Kaidan kindly, but firmly says no.

Kaidan knows Sam, and knows how easily he'll compromise himself to make someone he cares about happy, so he might keep it close to the vest why he doesn't want kids. Because if Sam sniffs out that it's because Kaidan doesn't want Sam to have to feel that pressure, he'd probably push back thinking he's taking something away from Kaidan.

But I think Kaidan believes it for himself, too. They have given up so much and done so much, that they deserve to be a little selfish. He's shared Sam with an entire galaxy for years. In many ways, Commander Shepard will always belong to other people. So wanting to keep Sam for himself is something I can see him feeling, and wanting to relieve Sam of the need to give up more of himself for kids would make it easier for him to want that out loud.

I think I might have said this before, so forgive me if I'm repeating it, but I do think that Sam has a lot of contact with Tuchanka after the war, and a sort of unspoken trend of krogan mothers bringing their young to Sam as a form of "pilgrimage" gains steam in the aftermath. He makes a lot of trips to Tuchanka, and krogan are known to bring their children to the orchard.

Helping to bring future generations to the krogan would be a type of 'fatherhood' Sam would be very, very proud of.

[bearpillowmonster]

Mass Effect Characters

(This is a representation of the whole series so spoilers ahead!)

Williams - I was a fan of her at the start but I'll be honest, as time went on, her character became something different to me. I liked hearing her little remarks about stuff in the worlds because this was the first time she's been out doing this kind of thing, she's a newbie and you're showing her all these cool places. Ashley has a little bit of animosity and I don't like that. Her supposed reason to be racist is that her grandfather was the only human to ever surrender to aliens but that's a piss poor excuse if I ever heard one. So you blame aliens, (every race of them) for your grandfather surrendering and getting that title? That's pretty narrow minded. I know you were just let out onto the field but calm down.

Then I let Liara on board and she got jealous "I hear the rumors, you're just lucky she looks like a girl." or something like that, I mean sheesh every time Liara talks Ashley's gotta start something. She's a character that remains grounded and human in a galaxy full of alien and sci-fi, detaching yourself from that reality and back to the real one. She has the whole "family defensive" thing going on as well, I could see her being a southern girl on Earth.

Kaidan - I half feel like he's "just there" because we started with him but I also half feel like they did everything to make him seem like he isn't "just there". Him being an L2 and having headaches and the dialogue options where he's like "You want this on or off the record?" I like that kind of stuff, it makes me think that he has a long standing friendship with Shep, even before he got his status. Now at one point you have to choose either his or Ashley's life, I chose Ashley because while I think she's a bit of an a-hole, I feel like she has more story than Kaidan.

Liara - I'll be honest, I saw the Asari in a lot of promo material and I wasn't a fan but actually in game, I could see the appeal. So you know I picked her for the romantic route. She's got a certain tone that reminds me of Starfire but she's there for you, y'know? It was like an instant connection and I mean the mind link just furthers the appeal. I think it's interesting to see them take her research studies and make her tempted to further her knowledge but I'm not sure that I like what she did in the long run. I could see if you didn't pick Liara in the first game and Feron ended up being her love interest but I feel this was the true route and don't regret it, she was worth it and the one I consistently favored.

Samara - The "other" asari. She's a bit of a tragic character. The more I thought about her story, the more I liked that it was being represented, not necessarily compelled to like her but I feel like I don't have to. I feel like I don't have to like a lot of these characters, just appreciate their different perspectives. You can also pick her daughter instead which is a whole thing on its own, I don't think she should be hunted for her genetic "defect" but at the same time, she's not willing to cooperate and uses it as a weapon so I stayed with Sam.

Thane - I saw this guy on the cover and was like "yeah I don't like him" but then I saw the vorcha and batarians and was like "eugh, they have him beat." Why is it that when people make aliens, they make them ugly? I mean that for every sci-fi series, even Star Wars I feel has some pretty dumb looking aliens. But then I came across Liara's mission with Feron and thought "huh" it eased me into it and I thought Feron would be the recruitable one but no, it was Thane. And yeah, I see why people like him now. He's dying and he wants to make the world a brighter place before leaving, by killing those making it worse. However this kind of conflicts with his ideals as an assassin where he's "just the weapon" and doesn't make the choice. So rather than succumbing to his disease, he joins your cause to go out in a blaze of glory. Part of me kind of wishes we had all of that just with Feron's story added in, all I'm saying.

Wrex - He's funny, trustworthy and strong. I even went out of my way to get his family armor. He isn't a bounty hunter that we're used to, he's a krogan, goes where the action is, not the pay. The fact that his whole species is like that is kind of funny but interesting to say the least. And especially when it comes to his race dying out due to the Genophage only for Saren to have a cure ready. That's really good drama for a game like this. I think he had the most personal vendetta versus Saren, so I brought him to Ilos, despite Garrus probably being a better fit gameplay wise. Plus with as many times as he steps out in front of me, he makes a good meat shield. I always enjoyed his presence but I couldn't help but feel his role was diminished in later games despite good quests here and there.

Grunt - A krogan experiment. By who? A krogan. "But I thought krogan weren't scientists?" He was made to be a weapon, above all else, a new age of krogan and the person who brought him together died to keep him safe. But Grunt ignores his protocols to forge his own path rather than a superior krogan but some stuff he heard in the tank and even now sort of shapes who he's becoming, he was technically just born and learning all these these, this strength, but it's not through experience, but born with it. He feels he didn't earn it so he gets the chance to prove himself and prove himself he does.

Kasumi - Kasumi is cheeky and has one of my favorite missions. I mean a heist? Stealth? I can also appreciate that she's not a romancable because you can talk to her but only one sided, there's no options to pick or questions to ask, you see, she had someone and lost him, you couldn't replace that. Though she seems to like Jacob. And she makes good conversation when she does talk, so what can I say? She has some great moments by just appearing out of thin air, going invisible and all.

Garrus - I first saw his character and thought he was really cool, wanted to recruit him right away with the little visor and blue gear and blue paint. I think he's about threading the line between what makes us the good guys. He even gives me a few examples like taking down a ship flying away with hostages. That's a difficult call because the killer was going to kill them once he took off anyway. It prepares you for choices you'll inevitably have to make. So I guess it makes sense why he kind of goes his own way for those two years after Mass Effect 1. He didn't have Sheperd to guide him, so he sought judgement on his own. And he pays for it with a blast to the face, it doesn't exactly humble him though. I mean, he was the outliar. I would've liked for him to stay buddies with Wrex but he ended up creating his own squad, only to get betrayed and lose them. Man this guy can't catch a break. He wanted to kill that dude too but I stopped him, I guess that means I like making killers into well rounded people with morals. Suggestion: A character that's a straight pacifist, like a monk or something that only knocks people out.

Tali - She's here as apart of her "Pilgrimage" which is kind of a coming of age thing where you go out away from the tribe, from the mother ship and learn and explore, similar to what I said with Williams but this is kind of Tali's goal. It's cool to see her contemplate what she thinks about everything with such a high knowledge of technology and her species but very limited when it comes to anything else. Does she get homesick? Does she plan on returning? And her species has to stay in that suit the entire time or she could get infected or perhaps even die "a bubble girl". She's sort of reluctant to make the Normandy her home but then accepts it and is proud. Even Tali's introduction was one of the best, you just don't know what to expect out of her or even realize that she'll be an integral part of your crew until she's already won you over. If Liara was #1 then Tali is #2

That's 10 pictures per post so here's a link to the next one -> HERE

[theoriginalladya]

As Luck Would Have It - (update) Day 6

Summary: What do a mini-Irish invasion, a murdered leprechaun, and an old flame have in common? Joker’s not amused by any of them.

~~~

Fandom: Mass Effect

Rating: Teen and Up

Relationships: Male Shepard & Kaidan Alenko, Male Shepard & Abby Williams, Male Shepard/Kaidan Alenko, EDI/Jeff "Joker" Moreau, Steven Hackett/Karin Chakwas, Steve Cortez/James Vega, Jack|Subject Zero/Samantha Traynor

Characters: Caleb Shepard (O'Connell - OC), Tadhg Shepard (O'Connell - OC), Niamh Shepard (O'Connell - OC), Kaidan Alenko, Karin Chakwas, Steven Hackett, Samantha Traynor, Jeff "Joker" Moreau, John Shepard, EDI, Ashley Williams, Zaeed Massani, Steve Cortez, James Vega, Garrus Vakarian, Urdnot Bakara - Eve, Urdnot Grunt, Urdnot Wrex, Kasumi Goto, The Illusive Man - Jack Harper, Jacob Taylor, Kelly Chambers, Rahna, Brigit O'Halloran (OC), Jack|Subject Zero

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Hallmark Movie AU, St. Patrick's Day, Past Relationship(s), Green Beer, bartending, Fluff and Angst, Humor, Shenanigans

Series: The Town of Norman

Chapter 17: Day 6

Excerpt:

“What’d’ya mean you’re closed?”

Without another word, James thumped a bucket on the diner counter.  Its contents sloshed noisily, a tiny wave threatening to breach containment.

John peered over the rim, frowning at the expected contents.  “It’s green.”

“Our dumbass ex-transportation expert flooded the town’s pipes with green food coloring,” James said. His voice had that not quite formal, not quite sing-song quality to it. “While the water seems to be fine, the inside of the pipes are stained green now, which means the perfectly drinkable water comes out green now. Which means!” James pointed at the ceiling in half-hearted emphasis.  “It is a health and safety violation to so much as make somebody coffee here this morning.”

Seated on the stool next to him, Kaidan looked aghast.  “You don’t have *coffee*?”

“A conspiracy from your husband to make you stop drinking the stuff,” Sam teased.

John shot her a disapproving look as Kaidan rounded on him. “It is no such thing.” He took one of Kaidan’s hands in both of his. “I love you,” he said, holding that upset, coffee deprived gaze. “I would never force you to give up your gross morning ritual.”

“Which I skipped,” Kaidan said, the roller coaster of emotions finally settling at wounded annoyance, “because we were coming to the diner and James makes the best coffee in town.”

“I do,” James agreed, puffing a little with pride, “but not today, medico.”

With a groan, Kaidan folded his arms on the countertop and dropped his head onto them.  “John.”

~~~

Read Full Chapter || Read from the Beginning || Read Series

Spotify Playlist

What started as an offer to lend out my Irish Shepard, Caleb, for some St. Patrick's Day shenanigans has turned into a full blown collaborative effort with @happychica, and I couldn't be more delighted! Thank you, my friend, for allowing Caleb, Tadhg, and Niamh into your sandbox to play! This has turned into such an amazing adventure, and we've only just gotten started! And huge thanks to @screwyouflightlieutenant for the fabulous commercial breaks! (I love these soooooooooo much!)

[mirandaputsherbestbuttforward]

Call me bitter, but like, the way that people are upset re: only getting bi Kaidan in Me3 (which has its own merits, don’t get me wrong) but then like, forgetting the fact that the wlw who play this game have also been done dirty from the start.

Yes, we had Liara who, despite asari being “monogendered”, was intended to be the player character’s main romance, but again, they always had mshep in mind first, so while it’s a doable option for fshep, it’s still very much a ‘neutral’ and no nuance romance re: the sapphic experience.

Second, once again, Ashley was meant to be a bi option. The voicelines are all in ME1, but she was given the Male Gaze(tm) treatment for ME3 where they, “let her hair down and gave her sex appeal” (ME3 official artbook), which disregarded her character as a career soldier, and acting as if her ‘tomboy’ appearance wasn’t attractive enough. BUT ALSO, at some con, one of the devs said, and I quote “Ashley didn’t fit the bill of bisexuality” whatever the hell that was intended to mean is still biphobic as hell. 

And then cue the issue with Jack wherein she literally talks about being involved with a man and a woman couple before she was betrayed by them. They took out her romance with fshep, Tali, and Miranda as possible options for fear of more outrage from conservatives.

Then we have Kelly (and let’s keep this straight: I like Kelly’s character a lot and think she had a Neat role on the SR2), but her “romance” didn’t count for the achievement and she was, once again, dressed in that sex scene pretty much for the explicit male gaze that just happened to include fshep.

And then! We finally get to ME3 where they’ve put in Samantha and Steve as the first lesbian woman and gay man in the series to romance. Sam’s romance, for the most part, is well done. Alix Wilton Regan, her VA, has two mums, and knowing that, she certainly put her heart into the performance. However, the way that they portray Samantha as having this weird Thing for the shower/hot tub (in Citadel DLC) is very fetishized and most certainly made for a man playing fshep to ‘enjoy the fantasy’ of lesbian sexuality, much akin to a lesbian porn category. 

So... again, not that I’m discrediting the mlm mshep players here, but often times I feel that people are quick to say that wlw fshep players got ‘more’ than they did - which, yes, in terms of options we did, but in terms of playing a romance that didn’t have the male player in mind when they were created?

Yeah no. 

[crqstalite]

Happy Year In Review 2021!!

I've certainly lived in interesting times and here's my eventual result of that. (Can't believe it's already been a year -- 2020)

WORD COUNT:

This year I wrote a total of 127,820 words (92,789 published, 35,031 unpublished). Honestly I'm a little disappointed, I thought I did more than that. Given, it's 2021, the year of crises left and right, but...yeesh. That's less than I did back in 2019. In like, two or three months.

Most of the year was out of my control though, and I'm still standing. I count it as a win.

The Breakdown:

My Mass Effect works took up about 3/4s of the actual word count, at 112,020 words written (and 22,934 unpublished, along with most of what I haven't released for Redamancy yet). My goal this year was to finish Redamancy but it had other ideas, so I'm maybe halfway through actually finishing it? That could be another year.

My Arcane works (what a surprise), are all still unpublished with posting dates being sometime in early 2021. However, they're 12,097 words by themselves so far, so it's okay. I didn't expect to end up writing for League anytime soon, but here we are.

My singular Dragon Age work this year was Bones, which was 1,879 words. Not surprised I didn't have more, it's Dragon Age. That and I lost all of the games when my account was hacked earlier in the year. Not a lot of motivation to write for this fandom.

My singular Mind Blind work this year was "Do It For Them", which was 1,824 words. It's been a while since I've really interacted with the IF fandom, so that's pretty unsurprising.

New Things I Tried:

Not much I don't think? Redamancy has actually been beta'd, every single chapter currently published has had a second pair of eyes over it (which is such a big help, you'd never notice how many misspellings you miss yourself), but beyond that I didn't really have the time or mental energy to do much else. EXCEPT for starting to write for Arcane. Never thought I'd do anything relating to League.

(God I hate the culture around League so much.)

Favorite Thing I Wrote This Year:

Probably Letters Home? Not super sure why but it is one of the few times I've genuinely liked something I wrote mainly in a non-OC's perspective. It's a working point for Joker and Citlali, which are two characters I hesitate to write together for whatever reason.

(That and it's criminal how Tiptree and Joker's feelings related to it are just swept under the rug -- it's criminal!)

Favorite Fic I Read This Year:

@ljandersen's Sideways. Easily one of my favorites (even if I'm still behind a handful of chapters -- and mentioned it last year), just for the characterization alone. I absolutely love how their Kaidan(s) and Shepard(s) interact with each other, and the little details that turn out to be bigger than anyone would've guessed. I absolutely adore the ever-growing future that they've weaved into the story, as well as how they expanded the Mass Effect universe into something all their own. I'm really looking forward to seeing where the rest of the story goes.

@shockdowndefiance's A Momentary Lapse In Judgement. Though I really loved just about every work in their library (Allison Shepard my beloved) this one really stuck with me because it really examined the coup for what it was logically and what Bioware couldn't quite do, especially for a Kaidanmancing Shepard. Allison's universe extends Mass Effect something emotionally compelling, and this fic is probably one of the best examples of that. I still absolutely love how they resolved it, as well as how Allison's character really shines through here, both as Commander Shepard as well as -- well, a regular human being. It's painful at times, but also terribly comforting.

@swaps55's Sonata. I'm such a sucker for in-between moment Mass Effect stories, especially Shenko centered ones. Sam Shepard is such a compelling character, and his relationship with Kaidan is certainly one that makes you so very mushy on the inside. Swaps' writing style is something that'll suck you in and never quite let you go, and their attention to detail is something to be admired. (Which is why I was up until the middle of the night finishing it -- definitely worth the read!)

& (last but definitely not least)

@lyrishadow's Between Times. I still read it time to time just because it makes me happy and amuses me greatly. It was a birthday gift from them to me and it still makes me really happy. I really love how they weaved both of our Shepards together to write something so nice, and how they took the time out of their life to do it.

Writing Goals For 2022

Be less on myself about writing. I was genuinely feeling so guilty and completely paralyzed out of having any fun the entire months of October, November and December just because I hadn't gotten any substantial writing done. Which shouldn't be how I feel, writing is a hobby of mine. Just because I was more likely to reach for my stylus or even one of my games than I was my bookmark for my longfic doesn't mean I'm a failure, even if I would've liked to see more progress. I mean, hell I'm a high school student who's about to graduate in a couple months -- you'd think I'd be able to afford myself the same grace I give my peers.

(It's the validation. I live off of it. I shouldn't, but I do.)

Word Of Thanks

Thanking the lovely Lock + Key writers because you guys are lovely people, (@delinquest , @glyndwrwrites , @lnewmanwrites , @tayareum , @thesupremepuff + @colonelpknight [can't tag you]) thank you for going on such a wild ride with me this year, its been so freaking fun working with you all!

The lovely @mallaidhsomo for their contributions to Redamancy and all of the useful advice they've provided me with. Along with the rest of the Bioware Fanfiction server, I might not interact much but its a very comforting place to be. <3

@that-wasnt-so-bad + @kaidans-alenkos + @mariaalenkoshepard + @actualanxiousswampwitch + @oakstar519 for being the people I always love seeing in my notifs and inbox, and the people who always have the best headcanons for the canon characters and their own.

@sheyshen + @greencrusader13 + @anchanted-one + @naaklasolus for always being there to listen to my rambly nonsense in our development channel. And responding with your own OCs because I love them very much.

@asianshep + @tali-zorahs + @metzlishepard + @dickeybbqpit + the rest of the A.G.U discord because the lot of you have been so kind to me since I popped in just for fun a while ago. Y'all are fun, and are the absolute sweetest <3 (I will track down the rest of your tumblrs eventually).

Tentatively go forth and prosper into 2022!