Obi-Wan, in Kenobi: Sorry it took me so long, I broke down on the way here.
Co-Worker: No problem. Is your speeder okay?
Obi-Wan: Speeder?
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*Obi-Wan Kenobi on Ellen*
Ellen: so we've got a little bit of a surprise for you
Obi-Wan: omg Ellen you didn't
*Darth Maul jumps out the box, immediately lunging for Obi-Wan*
*Obi-Wan already running off stage*
Audience: *Cheers and laughs*
*Obi-Wan runs back across the stage with Darth Maul chasing him. Both of them are screaming*
I'm sorry, I find this fucking hysterical. Inspired by this post
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Mace Windu: Some jedi have grown attachments towards the clone troopers...
Obi Wan, married to Cody: *gasp* How scandalous!
Plo Koon, on the process of legally adopting the Clone Army: Preposterous!
Anakin, who fools around with the 501st like they were all children: How could that reckless, handsome jedi do that??
Yoda: For an idiot, you all take me.
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Cody siping his caf watching Anakin and Ahsoka blow up a building: Not my circus, not my monkeys.
Obi-wan running towards the burning building: MycircusmymonkeysMycircusmymonkeysMycircusmymonkeysMycircusmymonkeys-!
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obi-wan, screaming at anakin mid battle: ibic cuyir an jorcu be gar!!
anakin, sighing: yeah i know
cody: when did you learn mando'a?????
anakin: i didn't. i just know the phrase "this is all your fault" in every language obi-wan speaks.
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Obi-wan: Why is Cody crying?
Rex: He took a 'which Jedi are you' quiz
Obi-wan: And?
Rex: And he got general Skywalker
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Aayla: I'm so happy, I could kiss you!
Bly: Um...Neat.
*later*
Bly, lying face down on his bed: I said "Neat", Cody. Who the fuck says neat these days? It's not neat to say neat but I said it anyways because I'm kriffing stupid.
Cody, reading a book: Don't beat yourself up too much, Bly. Everyone gets nervous sometimes. Remember what I did when Obi-Wan confessed his love for me?
Bly: Didn't you thank him?
Cody: *closes the book and looks at the ceiling* I fucking thanked him.
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Obi-Wan, in Kenobi: People call anything ‘mental illness’ these days.
Obi-Wan: Like, sometimes, I’ll lie in bed all weekend, because I no longer take pleasure in things I used to enjoy.
Obi-Wan: Does that make me *uses air-quotes* ‘depressed’?
Bail Organa: Yes..
Leia: It does..
Second sister: Yeah, dude..
Obi-Wan:
Obi-Wan, in disbelief: ...What?
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Anakin: Not gonna lie, I'm kind of afraid of Cody...
Obi-Wan: As you should be.
Anakin: No, for real, he is kind of-
Obi-Wan As. You. Should. Be.
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He never dies!!
Obi-Wan, at Maul's funeral: I need a moment with him.
Everyone: Of course. *They leave*
Obi Wan, leaning over Maul′s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead.
Maul, ignights his lightsaber: Yeah, no shit.
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Padme: did you know Obi wan gives Cody flowers every single morning?
Anakin:…yes?
Padme: why don’t you do that :(
Anakin:..
Anakin: d-do you want me too?
Padme: YES Ani!
-the next day-
Cody, staring at the flowers is Anakin offering him: why the hell are you doing this?
Anakin: I don’t get it either just take them-
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cody: don't worry, i have a few knives up my sleeve for situations like this, sir.
obi-wan : i think you mean cards.
cody, pulling a knife from his sleeve: no, i do not.
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Obi-Wan : Look at me straight in the eyes and tell me the truth, Cody!
Cody : You can’t expect me to look into your eyes and be straight.
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Anakin: I want my master.
Cody: I want your master to.
Anakin: Snips? what do you think the commander ment by that?
Ahsoka, not paying attention: He wants to bang Obi-wan.
Anakin:
Anakin:
Anakin: Rex. Your brother is dead to me.
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