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#least uncomfortable thing to call them .
meirimerens · 2 years
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thinking about how mishandled the herb brides are because like. The Text tells us they're not sexual beings (P1 mentions them being virgins, engaged to the Earth, and not to be touched even by their husbands, almost, for a lack of a better word and to conjure an image more than anything, priestess-types) and that their dances are nonsexual and sacred (all all true and correct) WHILE. giving them detailed / 3D modeled nipples. topless. clothes very conveniently torn [in ways that would be unrealistic for actual dancing like in the fucking moshpit]. all pretty thin hairless white-passing blemishless 20-something women. being already sexualized as white-passing asian women, but if they looked more like other NPC models/members of the Kin like the Kayura models (which to me would make more sense because they are never mentioned to be mixed in the way Artemy, an indigenous man who's blonde blue eyes due to being mixed, is [while still very much being indigenous and it being a central part of his story]), it would be even more obvious and would steer even more into Very Blatant fetishization of asian women. and then one asks, are they white-passing because they're sexualized? are they sexualized because they're white-passing? was it an admission of guilt to not make them look like Kayura model, because it would be too obvious then? or is it an admission of lust for women more white-passing? is it about beauty in the eye of the beholder?
then there's bewildering and dehumanizing lore of members of the Kin being non-humans, through the existence of the Worms (literally half-soil), them being a (more or less literal) hivemind, and that being "less human"/closer to the earth (nice_dichotomy_what_lies_outside_of_it png but also... the game touches on that...) immunizes them to the Earth's disease... and yet the Brides look like women... pretty thin hairless white-passing blemishless 20-something women who someone found wise to give 3d modeled nipples to, still good for the ritual cutting... do you hear how i'm going mad yet...
edit to add because while i was so mad and it WAS in my mind i just didn't have the strength to add it when i first wrote:
and they're bought and traded between the odonghs they pair with (again, closer to cattle or things) ... ladies there's so much. there's too much.
#werewolf tearing shirt off again#ah well. [lets myself drift away in the images i've made of the brides and my constant quest to humanize them and respect them and#make them diverse and full of life. which i might never manage to and yet i try.]#also i was thinking like. their celibacy + virginity + central spiritual place in the kin do be reminding me a lot of priestesses#[really sorry for boxing them in like that but if there is stuff of the same thing just with another name imagine i used it here#i just don't know any other]#and priestesshood famously was an option for women to avoid marriage; and often domestic/sexual servitude to their husbands#same for nuns who are also said to be like. ''engaged to christ'' in their own way (again only making tangentially similar patterns;#not calling the Brides nuns of course)#so having them be Said to be nonsexual [until they're said to be etc] while being Shown as sexualized it's like. oooh the misery#neigh (blabbers)#disclaimer i'm white & i'm sure Many indigenous women regardless of origins have touched on this in more direct and deeper ways i ever coul#oh there's also the fact that the kin is said in design document to mirror in ways 19th century native americans#and the herb brides going to sexualize themselves in the B.H. ''for outsiders'' (p1 dialogues)#mirrors native american women being pushed in brothels from the crushing roller of colonization stripping them of land#pushing them into poverty and homelessness#in ways that i um. raised eyebrow emoji to say the least. find deeply uncomfortable.
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rapidhighway · 6 months
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I'm seeing more people pleasing takes on reels today again I have controversial opinions maybe I need to be beat on the head or somethin idk
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#OUghh... I've been really sick the past few days like not able to keep food down and had to go to the hospital#to get iv fluids and etc. to stay hydrated lol...#perhaps some sort of stomach virus or something. but still very grrrr for it to happen in the middle of the evil summer of#course#when everything is hot and uncomfortable anyway.. I really wanted to get a sims video and costume pictures finished this week and keep#up writing like 1000 ish words a day for my game. but.. alas... the universe was like... I Think Not#I at least have been able to have some tea and juice and applesauce and like 4 saltine crackers today so#I always think it's funny when you're ill what sort of little things count as successes#like on any normal day eating a few crackers would just be something you don't even give a second thought#to . But when you're really sick it's like .. WOW.. I ate TWO crackers.. amazing.. huzzah... I should get an award certainly#call the press and alert them. I should be in the newspaper headlines for this harrowing feat. etc. lol#I still feel very shaky and weak though.. but am like... hhhhh... when can I work on my projects again...#Also I literaly never leave the house or have contact with anyone so maybe it's not a virus and was more food poisioning or something#since I'm not sure where I'd get a virus even but... regardless... stinky#just complaining since I suppose that is what personal blogs are for lol. I'm a private person in the sense of wanting to proect my identi#ty and like.. I dont want an alexa in my house listening to me all the time and I dont tag my real location on social media or share photos#that could reveal the front of my house or etc. etc. But in all other senses I really don't beleive in holding stuff in. Because it will#just fester. especially when it has to do with other people (like relationship issues or something) but even when its just stuff that only#has to do with you. If something annoys me then I shall let it be openly known. if I'm bothered it will be clear. etc.#Which I guess makes me seem like a Hater And Complainer but I guess I just feel like its better over all to explain and express openly#than to just silently stew and hold everything in and then probably feel worse for it later or something.#Expressing annoyance is kind of like casting the concept off from yourself and releasing it into the wild so that you're not harboring it#anymore. all grievances must be aired eventually. etc. this is a Pro complaining zone lol#If you feel like shit dont hide it. just go 'man I feel like shit'. etc. etc. Cast it off into the universe. be free#ANYWAY... aughhh......... the wizard has fallen ill in his stinky little tower.. pacing the stone floors in tattered robes. hair disheveled#. carefully sipping a single cup of tea over the course of an hour lest drinking too fast upset his fragile stomachs againe..
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coyoxxtl · 8 months
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tumblr centrist liberals stop acting like voting is the most influential and important political activity you can participate in challenge
#me donating to mutual aid posts on tumblr and donating esims to people in gaza has done worlds more influence than any vote i ever did#people who risk their lives in protests do more than voting#i firmly believe that#this isnt a Voting is Pointless post this is Voting is the Barest Minimum#voting is easy. when there’s no outside barriers its so fucking easy.#you fill in a card and call it a day. its easy to feel like you made a difference when all you did is fill in some dots.#yall barely even follow up on who you vote for or even Care if the people you vote for fail you#its the perfect thing for weak liberals to attach to#treat it like the be all end all with activism and you have the easiest get out of real political action card#no need to get your hands dirty if you did all you needed to#as someone who DOES vote. voting is the easiest political thing i engage with. everything else is a risk. or at least a sacrifice.#voting is barely anything to me. i dont feel like i do Anything with it. but donating. making political art. THATS something. thats REAL.#i would go to big protests if i lived somewhere with them#like i understand. wanting voting to be enough. im a heavily depressed bitch who feels like they cant engage with anything big or important#i know tumblr is full of those types. yall dont want to do anything. yall dont want to be uncomfortable or upset or anything negative.#personal comfort above all else. thats what tumblr is. thats what centrist liberals are. there’s no real desire to break out-#of the comfort zone or status quo respectively. yall are scared to get Involved. and i am too. but with how current events are going…#i can see that i don’t want to be that anymore. i know i need to be more than that. its hard and risky but i Need to.#and so do yall. yall NEED to engage with activism outside of voting. or you’re doing nothing.#txt
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monsterbisexual · 8 months
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feeling like im being driven to my execution (its a drs appointment)
#p#also thats a little dramatic but i do hate them so much#i was feelin like well ill be uncomfortable n miserable but its not the end of the world#buuuut then i remembered (TMI AHEAD U HAVE BEEN WARNED)#that last month ish when i was here for an actual concern (n agreed to this physical bleh)#i was told im overdue for another pap smear n like they cant force me into it ofc but i know its smart to do it#cuz i already have lots of anxieties abt what if i secretly have some disease or condition n im gonna die blah blah blahh#but last time it was so awful n i was like crying thru it cuz of the pain which. isnt normal#googling it afterwards i found ppl saying stuff like 'it might be weird n uncomfortable but not too bad'#so i was like well ok thats just me then i guess :/#n anyway i def think i have that condition called w/e cuz ive never been able to do any kind of like. anything in there#not like day to day its a huge deal but for this its not too fortunate :/#so long story short i remembered ill have to decide if ill let them do it again at this appt#n i was reading abt the process again n then uh oh crying -_-#omw now n idk what ill do tbh. def wanna say no but also idk i shld be responsible or smth#dies instead.#n anyway even if its just the super basic physical theyre gonna do ill still wanna become an incorporeal entity thing#hate it hereeeee (body)#its a PA im seeing who i remember being nice some other time i saw her so theres that at least#theyre gonna wanna weigh me tho i forgot that too jeez#i said no last time but idk. kms
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magnusmodig · 6 months
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rough childhood headcanon qs / @clxscdeyes / no longer accepting !
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╰┈➤ 7 . how old was your muse when they realized they had childhood trauma?
||. one whole "today years old" post!ragnarok and hela's reveal. Except, even then, according to the movie, not really because Thor is still in heavy denial about all of it where Odin is concerned. I've spoken a bit (here) about how Thor adores his family; he idolizes them and views them through blinding rose-colored glasses, (especially when they're deceased) and that is especially true of his circumstances.
So, very often times when the truth clashes with the rose-colored view of them (namely: his father), Thor does one of two things: find a way to justify the words or action with the surrounding context of the time to make it make sense (e.g., well he scolded me harshly because i was talking back), or avoid it altogether. (this is his go-to. no talking about it; thor would rather not right now, so he does not.)
Key example being: he would rather focus on how his father changed his ways, and the Odin that he knew and grew up with was a man who had turned away from pursuing war for war's sake, and was instead one who valued peace and life. He would rather focus on that aspect of Odin, and take in the broader picture of Odin's life. REGARDLESS of the fact that what Thor is deeply, personally affected - not with the realization that Odin changed his ways once upon a time - but by the fact that he lied to him, manipulated him, and controlled and shaped every aspect of his being, for Thor's whole life, JUST to avoid another Hela. Someone who Thor is not, could not be farther from, and never knew about, because Odin (apparently) kept the matter of his true first-born a closely-guarded secret and seemingly would have continued to were it not for Odin's death, Hela's escape, and Ragnarok all coinciding at the same moment in time. And this, all because Thor rationalizes it as "well, I wouldn't want to be remembered and judged based on the person that I used to be. I should extend that same kindness to my father, because he too, changed." (x10 because now Odin is dead. And it's in poor-taste to speak ill of a dead man.)
The problem namely being: Thor only talks about things when Thor decides it's time to talk about things ; when he is ready. ...but as this is a topic that ripple effects down to Thor's core, good luck getting him to open up about it, even just with himself.
#(yknow what sucks most about this is that 2011-2015 thor was on a trajectory where)#(while he still wouldn't talk about a lot of things he wasn't as firmly rooted in /absolute denial/ like he is now >>)#(he would lock up and not talk about his personal feelings but he was still /thinking/ about them)#(- and could grow ready to share his thoughts once he processed through all of it.)#(or at least he would broach the broad concepts while still lightly brushing over 'k but how did it make THOR feel')#(dude would rather choke than talk about his own feelings no support system for thor he's so dumb)#(which is also just so funny because he never /denied/ the fact that he's feeling under the weather either)#(he just... won't elaborate on why he is or how to feel better.)#(but anyways)#(to rationalize the trajectory shift away from 'thor being able to talk about deeply upsetting topics for him even if it's uncomfortable')#(i've decided that so much has happened in such a short amount of time and there's /so/ many things eating at him-)#(-that he's subconsciously decided he's not going to talk much about any of them. because there's just too much.)#(the vibe of 'if i talk about this now i'm going to fall and if i fall i don't know if i can get up again because it's finally too heavy)#(-and i can't afford to fall down bc there's too much at stake outside of me so i just will not take the chance')#(he can if he's ever with someone he truly trusts and he can speak about it NORMALLY if that person pushes him enough)#(because you've always had to needle thor to /actually answer your question/ rather than talk half-way around it)#(//stares at thor 2011 where he never opens up to jane even once not even at the fire-side chat)#(but until then it's big denial mode bc ragnarok messed him up something fierce and i'm not even talking about-)#(-the order of in-universe events that happen in the movie orz)#( ooc . ) — stories that leap from the page .#( answered . ) — black feathers fall to a raven's call .#clxscdeyes#( headcanon . ) — glory to the man who toils for his land . may it ever prosper .
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aliensmoothie · 1 year
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i dont know that borderlands was necessarily a " 2020 interest ) because lets be honest ive been weird abt that series since like . 2016 maybe when i finished bl2 for the first time . and i got in trouble with my biodad because i was talking to him abt it and said the word badass . so if you think about it its really his fault that im like this
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labyrynth · 7 months
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/salt
trying to interact w genshin fandom is just constantly playing russian roulette and losing
like is this random user normal about kaeya and diluc or are they convinced that kaeya’s name is ragnvindr? are they normal about kaeya and diluc or do they ignore everything diluc has to say?
are they normal about kaeya and diluc or do they ignore the original text in favor of a mistranslated snippet that has a meaning opposite what they think?
are they normal about kaeya and diluc or do they call everyone that prefers canon over their headcanon a freak?
go on, give it a spin. i promise some of the chambers are empty.
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meejijis · 1 year
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Left the DSP fandom and wada fandom since somewhere in 2018 or 2019 and the fact that there’s still ppl complaining about me blocking them in this year of 2023. I have most of yall blocked cuz I’m just curating my experience lol? Plus there are A LOT of certain... characters and ships that still makes me highkey really uncomfortable from DSP’s works to this very day. I have every right to block out content I'm uncomfortable with and it’s not anyone’s business on why I block someone. Adapt and move on
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artemisaed · 1 year
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#from kile#vi feel like vi shouldn't call vyself gray-aroace anymore#not because vi don't connect with the term. vi absolutely do connect with the term and it just Clicks in a way that other terms dont#but every post vi see says ''aroaces dont feel love'' ''aroaces dont ever want relationships'' ''all aroaces have 38034083480 qpps and HATE#and DESPISE all allos and any normal relationships'' and similar stuff#and like vi absolutely support people who dont want romantic/sexual/normative relationships! if you dont feel love then thats awesome!#one of vy best friends is a loveless aro who doesnt want any romantic relationships and vi think ze's amazing for that#vi think amatonormativity is stupid and dumb and nobody should be forced to conform to any standards of ''your relationship has to be like#this!''#but vi just. dont feel like vi should be in the community. vi feel romantic love and vi am in an at least semi-normative mono relationship#vi dont hate allos or relate to even most of the ''all aspecs relate to this'' posts or want to be poly or hate all romance or any of the#other things that are defining features of the aspec community. vi feel stupid and privileged and like vi dont belong here and vi feel like#vi'm taking away their safe spaces by being here because vi'm not aspec enough and vi don't share their hatred for romance/love and vi'm#basically the amatonormative person that theyre all supposed to be fighting against because vi'm just so extremely not aspec. if you ignore#the fact that vi dont feel attraction very often then vi'm literally just another 100% allo person. vi dont belong in aspec communities and#vi'm afraid that vi'm hurting people by being here because vi'm not really aspec enough. vi cant really put into words exactly why vi have#this uncomfortable lonely hated feeling?? vi cant even describe the feeling well its just. every time people talk about ''omggggg allos do#this and aspecs do that'' vi relate to both of them but usually vi relate to allos more because its always like. ''allos need relationships#and aspecs dont lol we're so much better and cooler aren't they sick freaks for wanting love and romance wow how childish and gross''#and vi just feel. so alone
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frankensteincest · 1 year
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how many times can I use the words cannibalism and sex and alienation in this essay I will be reading out loud in a class full of cowards
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mossyfella · 1 year
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saw a post that made me think of this but i’m not adding it bc i don’t want to derail but. i think we should approach the “no kink at pride” crowd more of what they actually probably are. kids/younger people who still view sex as a scary/gross thing. and tell them that when ur part of a community as diverse as the lgbt+ community ur going to see things that make u a bit uncomfy!! things that make u go ummm…. but that those people have just as much as a right to exist as u do. but mostly we gotta realize that these are people who are probably uncomfortable with themselves on some level. source: i used to be a “no kink at pride!!!!” person until i Grew Up a bit more
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tkbrokkoli · 2 years
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a colleague of mine used to be a professional athlete in the 80s and today she showed me and another colleague photographs from back then and she casually mentioned that two of her team mates outed themselves as trans men and two as lesbians later in life and i was like !!!!!! im
#not fandom related#personal log stardate#i want to write more but im not sure what im feeling and how to express it#she used the phrase 'man in a woman's body' to mean they are trans man which i found v good actually#bc she seemed to fully except and support them. these guys and dykes should be in their late 50s now i think? idk any older queer ppl#so having an older colleague casually mention that felt v good#also they all were from a small town i think#just like me!!! i know several of my high school friends are also queer. like. me and at least 2 others#but we all outed ourselves way later. years after high school#oh fuck i just realized i completely misspelled 'accept'. i've had a long week ugh#anyway tomorrow i gotta make a horrible phone call w my broken phone and i already hate it and i'm dreading it#abt my phone. it doesn't charge anymore so i have it turned off at all times so i can make phone calls when the urgent need arises#and tomorrow i have to call electrician. not bc i want to but bc i was ordered to and i absolutely fucking hate it#*an electrician. or a janitor. idk yet#the other person who could call instead of me is just straight up rejecting to do it but it rly urgently needs to be Done#so im gonna have to step up as the mature person now and i tell myself 'it needs to be done end of discussion'#but i hate that i am always always always the person who has to take care of uncomfortable things like making phone calls and shit#like. i get it. it's necessary. there will always be phone calls i have to make. it's just. why me??? i fucking hate this shit!!! AAAAAAAHHH#anyway i should go to bed. i haven't checked my notifs yet it's been a rly exhausting week. hope you guys are ok thi#*tho
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fingertipsmp3 · 2 years
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I am once again sad that a person I bonded with in a dream is not real
#ALEX. where are you and who are youuuu#okay so the dream was crazy. like.. coherent by my usual standards but still ridiculous#i was back at high school but was the age i am now & i was attending a class in ‘business and employment’ which was supposed to help us all#get jobs and learn skills. but in reality the vast majority of the people in the class (including myself) were in mlm schemes#(multi-level marketing before anyone gets confused with the acronym)#myself and the entirety of my high school friend group (about 8 or 9 people) formed the largest faction and we were selling fragrances#for exactly the sort of company you would expect. anyway. i’d been elected manager even though someone else in the group (who actually sells#this shit irl lol) had recruited me & another person’s mom had invested money into it so that none of us had to actually buy inventory#and i was so uncomfortable and ashamed. i was like ‘okay i’ll just do this for a month and then bounce so i can at least get work/management#experience’. so i was very much checked out when everyone was brainstorming ideas for how to come up with a brand & sell it#the only thing i did notice is that there was this guy named alex who was pretty much reporting us whenever we breathed. an example would be#we wanted to call ourselves ‘lions’ but apparently that was the name of an lgbt society in the area that was important to him#so he complained to the teacher/facilitator about us and we couldn’t use lions. and our whole group was complaining about him#but i was thinking ‘fuck i hope he gets us shut down’. he seemed like a nice guy and the stuff people started saying was borderline#homophobic so i had to be the one to shut them down like ‘hey i’m bi as well and i’m your fucking manager. any more of that and you can find#yourself a new job’#so anyway. next thing that happened was the facilitator was like ‘okay we seem to have pretty much been taken over by mlm schemes BUT here#is a list of people in the class who do not want to be recruited & their reasoning. just so you can take note’ and she does a presentation#of course it starts with alex and his ideological opposition to mlms; but there are other people like a girl who has a large academic#workload. but it becomes apparent that alex is the one who rallied them all together to spread dissent. so i went over to talk to him#(for some reason he was now hiding in a tent) and i was like ‘yes alex!!!! can i shake your hand?’ and he was puzzled but he let me#then i stood up and said ‘can i just say something. everyone has great reasons for not wanting to be recruited and as a manager; i want to#say that if i catch any of my employees trying to recruit anyone on the do not recruit list for any reason; you will be fired immediately’#of course this causes a schism. but it also causes me and alex to end up having a heart-to-heart where he’s like ‘why are you even part of#one of these things’ and i’m like ‘honestly i just want legitimate work experience’ and he’s like ‘i can think of so many more legitimate#jobs. including like. fly-tipping. i’d rather have that on my cv than scentsy’ and i was like ‘you’re so right’#and then i woke up thinking ‘god i’m going to have to go door to door selling this shit’ but then i realised i actually didn’t#and i was so happy#it has motivated me to go back to job-hunting though because my god.#that five minutes when i thought i was going to have to traverse the neighbourhood dressed like an idiot and selling wax melts? bleak.
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mrfoox · 2 years
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Being genderflud for me is always a mess
#Miranda talking shit#No ok it isnt... But ivr always been a.. 'tomboy' ot whatever and never been a girly girl... I mean i had to play makeup and#Dress up doll for my sister until i was 5 but after that i basically abruptly stopped wearing any dresses unless i had to...#Only thing appearance wise i kept that was feminine was long hair. Idek why i did that? Maybe bc ive always had it so i just kept it... Or#Maybe bc it was the few feminine things i had. Ive had such difficulty with my name. In the teen years it eas severe#But i still never ... Changed it? To this day i haven't. I have my online name having an mr in it but i always give my name and i mean#Yeah... I like being referred to as bro/dude and such but usually don't like being referred to as a girl... I dont hate it usually but im#Indiffrent? Maybe why ive been struggling with sx isnt only bc of my shit self esteem and that but also with gender. I know if i would have#Had the option id want to been born a guy. I mean... Most days at least i think so. Bc i am uncomfortable with my shape and organs. The#Fact i have buubs makes me wamt to shrivel up and perish. But i also mostly love my tighs. Maybe bc i like that on others as well..#Heck idk. Sometimes i want to really go all out and make myself look cute and girly but i dont havr the confidence or knowledge#So instead i keep wearing what I've been since i was 8 yrd old (big hoodie or tshirt + jeans/sweatpants) would lovr to know someone#Whos into make up and fashion who would teach me and take me out and pick mr outfits. But also i dont think im cute enough to do that#Not cute enough and not cool enough to be a boy ... Im an oddly shaped blob /:#I dont know what i am i just let people call me whatever they want. Its a shame itd usually a girl. Thr time a kid called me 'boy' i was#Genuinely happy but then their parent corrected them and i was like damn... He had it man he knew what was up#Maybe I'd not struggle as much if i was skinny bc 98% of my time I've been overweight so..curves comes with the territory#My moms genes also got me the biggest cake in history like i cant lose it i think its permanent. It can get bigger tho
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eggmeralda · 2 years
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<3<3 (<- platonic hearts)
#i thought i was being a bitter jealous aromantic bc i hated seeing my friend with his girlfriend#but turns out pda is just a thing that makes most people uncomfortable and i'm not being irrational#which i only found out after having a whole conversation with one of my other friends#he's the one guy in my band that i never talk to alone like whenever it's just us two we just sit in awkward silence#so it's nice that our first proper conversation was like a really deep one where we could tell each other anything and stuff#and yeah he was also uncomfortable with them just having their hands on each other's legs and touching each other's hair and stuff#like fair enough if they do that but not in public??#that's the kind of stuff i wanna read about in fanfics not see in real life#but anyway at least i made a new friend <3#i mean i guess we were already friends and are literally in a band together but now i feel like i can fully call him like. my Friend friend#as opposed to someone i just know and get along with#also congratulations to him for being the first deep conversation i've had with someone new since The Aromantic Awakening#bc usually if i had that with anyone before i would end up getting a fake crush on them#but i'm thinking about it now and i have no romantic feelings for him <3#like no more compallo#it's a weird feeling?? like this nice glowing feeling is exactly what i'd always mistake for romantic attraction but i now know it's not?#it's just friendship god this is so cheesy#but anyway <3#ramble
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