everything i've learned about personal growth, self-love, so far
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as inside is outside
this is called the principle of correspondence, it is one of the universal laws (the law of attraction is not the only one that exists!) it is very important because many times we try to change our outside without first changing our inside, how we feel about ourselves, or the circumstances that surround us. just like how we feel, what we think we see reflected in the outside world. everything is a reflection of ourselves, which is why it is very important not to react negatively to circumstances without first asking ourselves what is not working inside of us that is making this happen?
get out of the role of the victim
it is no use for us to live pitying ourselves for the past, for what happened, for how we behaved, or how they were with us. Has victimization been working for you so far? no, it hasn't, so we have to get out of this role and take responsibility for our actions. we may have done wrong but at the time we did not know how to do it in a better way and all experiences, negative or positive, give us a learning experience. that bad thing that may have happened to you with someone else can help you to push yourself and transform your life.
related to the previous point, we must stop living in the past, that will only make us repeat the same circumstances, and attract the same type of people over and over again. we have to forgive ourselves first and then others, no matter the damage they may have caused us, we can not continue to live hating or with resentment towards other people.
holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. buddha
no one can help you to improve, only you
the change is in you and this is very important, i, a therapist, anyone can give you guidelines on how to heal or improve your life but if you do not do your part to change nothing will change. there are no external means, everything is within you, and you have the power to change your life, yourself, and the circumstances that surround you. just ask yourself why there are so many people who go to therapy for years and continue the same or worse? because they have put all their power into someone external to them and believe that someone else will solve all their problems.
what you focus on expands
this is so simple but we don't seem to give it much importance as we always tend to focus on what we don't like and keep wondering why nothing is changing. if you focus on something you don't like you will keep attracting more of the same. if there is a situation that you don't like, focus on the positive of it, whether it is something about you, a circumstance or a person.
what you focus on with your thought and feeling is what you attract into your experience. rhonda byrne
goodbye to comparison
it is useless to compare ourselves with other people, we must understand that each one of us is different and we are in this world to live and create our own experiences. we also have to live our own lives and focus on ourselves. i think it is stupid to think that someone is better or worse than us because this is our life, what matters is us, not someone we don't know at all or if we do know them, they don't really contribute to us. anyway, we can learn from those people who inspire us to improve ourselves. remember that there is no one prettier, smarter, smarter, whatever than you, it's just your perspective and you can change it and focus all that on yourself.
we manifest our beliefs
you want to change in your life but nothing is changing? maybe it is because you are trying to change something external without changing yourself first (i refer to the first point of this post, the correspondence principle) i mean, if you keep having the same negative thoughts every day that will keep repeating itself in your daily experience. start replacing those negative thoughts with more positive ones and everything will start to change around you. if you want to manifest something and it is not manifesting ask yourself what your beliefs are about that subject and start affirming the opposite. if you want more money but you keep thinking that you are not worthy or that it is very difficult to get it, you are blocking that abundance from coming into your life, so in turn tell yourself that you are abundant, that money flows in your life and it is very easy to get it. and this is just an example, you can do it with anything. i think this point is very important, so keep it really present in your life, whatever you create in your life you have created it before in your mind.
stop reacting to what others do or think
i think this is so powerful and keeps referring back to the previous points because everything has a relationship. how much energy do we spend complaining about something that someone did that we didn't like or that seemed wrong to us? think that maybe that person didn't realize it or maybe they see it differently (that's why it's important to understand that everyone's perspective is different and doesn't mean it's right or wrong). it doesn't matter what happened but we should stop responding to what we don't like and give so much importance to what other people do and focus all that energy on us, on what we want to improve.
be kind to oneself
this is one of the most powerful and simple teachings at the same time. we have to stop criticizing ourselves (and of course others), stop judging ourselves for things we do or did and in turn, we have to start treating ourselves as the person we love the most in this world, with love and respect. instead of judging ourselves, and scolding ourselves for what we have done wrong, we have to reward ourselves for every little thing we do daily, this will give us a lot of confidence in ourselves and will increase our self-esteem.
we will not always be positive
we are human, we feel, we suffer, and there are circumstances external to us that we can not control so it is totally normal to have bad days or not feel good (in the case of women is also due to our cycle) so we can not pretend to be always in a good mood, but that does not mean we have to collapse at any difficulty. We can see the positive in every situation and continue to be grateful even on the grayest of days but don't beat yourself up for not always feeling your best, because it's normal. but we can change these states by doing things that make us feel good.
first you, then others
if you want to make a big change in your life and you are already being more conscious, even changing your mentality you will see that there are people who may leave, it's completely fine! they have already fulfilled their work in your life, nothing happens, there will always be someone better who is more in tune with who you are being right now and bring you much more than those who left. when we are in this process of change it is good to be alone, you have to know yourself, that is very important. We have to learn to spend time with ourselves, listening to our thoughts and what we feel in order to know what we really want. and the same goes for our self-love, first, we have to work on it to get everything else. we may start out wanting a new job or a new relationship but if we haven't changed ourselves we will continue to attract the same type of people or opportunities as before.
our new beliefs
i learned this from louise hay. she mentioned that she has a list of what her beliefs are and that is so helpful. it will help us to replace our old beliefs with new ones, the ones we want! it's so powerful. some of your new beliefs can be:
good things always happen to me i am a lucky girl/boy I am prosperous everything works out well for me
and i have learned much more during this journey of personal growth and I could continue sharing much more but i consider these to be the most important lessons, they are simple but powerful and my recommendation is that you reread them daily until they become part of your new beliefs because it will help you to understand much more.
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adviceformefromme · 5 months
This is not a fucking game, this is your actual life. Those mornings wasted scrolling as soon as you wake up for 1 hour plus are over. You’re done watching other peoples lives, because your life is about to become a highlight reel. YOU are the main character. YOU are living the life of your absolute dreams. YOU are finally making the moves you have been imagining. Your wardrobe FINALLY reflects everything you’ve been visualising. When you look in the mirror you feel like an absolute GODDESS, BEAUTIFUL, RADIANT. You wake up and feel so ENERGISED. You’ve created a life that excites you, that motivates you, that fulfils you. Feel it, breathe into it. It’s all yours babygirl. 
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boredgirlsclub · 4 months
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pink pilates princess
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madstoicfemme · 6 months
Career Affirmations
• I love what I do.
• I can always move ahead in my career.
• My career makes me feel safe and excited.
• My career is very lucrative.
• I already make a huge load of money.
• People at work love me.
• I have strong interpersonal skills that are very useful as I move ahead in my career.
• I am making moves every moment.
• I can always choose what I do for a living.
• I can retire when I want.
• Working is such a fun and joyful thing for me.
• I can rest and relax whenever I want.
• I have plenty of time to unwind.
• Time is on my side.
• Money is on my side.
• I can be my own boss if I want to be.
• I get paid for doing something I consider fun and stimulating.
If you found this post useful, consider supporting me by buying my poetry collection.
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leveledupmindset · 10 months
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chichiscloset · 2 months
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Paradise ✨
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malusokay · 9 months
how to treat yourself on a budget
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I often get comments about my self-care routines being unrealistic, and I get it; not everyone can afford a facial, a professional massage, or some fancy lush products, so here I have a guide on how to tread yourself on a lower budget! <3
Got some oats and a banana? Great, try the oatmeal banana face mask! Mash a banana, add some honey, and add your oats; let that soak for a while, and put it on your face! (link down below)
Exfoliate, shave and put coconut oil on your legs. It will feel amazing.
Make yourself a green tea, and once your tea is done, put the tea bags on your eyes, it helps with dark circles, and you will feel great!
Make a new playlist with your favorite songs.
Slice up some cucumber and put the slices on your face; I don't know if it actually does something, but I've seen it In movies, and it looks fun.
Make a smoothie; my favorite is banana, frozen raspberries, and coconut milk! :)
Drink a lot of water.
Look for a yoga or stretching routine on youtube; my favorite is the Pamela Reif 30 stretching routine <3 (link down below)
✩‧₊*:・love ya ・:*₊‧✩
oatmeal mask (don't add the lemon if you have sensitive skin!!):
stretching routine:
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princesslily · 1 year
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Pink <3
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jluxsymone · 2 months
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10 steps to self-love according to louise hay
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these principles were shared by the author louise hay in her audiobook "how to love yourself" which you can find on youtube and i recommend listening to it. they are very useful and they really work if we are committed to put them into practice, so that's why i share them with you
abandon criticism
stop criticizing yourself now and forever. you've been criticizing yourself for years, so i invited you to try another tactic. it was eye-opening for me, when i discovered that i could make changes that would support me in loving myself. everything is a process. remember everyone changes. choose nurturing thoughts.
2. don't frighten yourself
stop scaring yourself with frightening thoughts. i have observed that people create overwhelming circumstances out of a small situation. the mind is such a good movie director that it creates horror movies. forgetting the divine power.
3. be nice, kind and patient with yourself
a good example of the power of patience is when you cultivate a garden. at first, you find barren soil. then you turn it over, sow, and even though it looks like nothing is happening, great things are happening, of course, if you have sown seeds of prosperity. life is like a garden.
4. be patient with yourself
look at negative thoughts as weeds. be inspired by the beautiful. human beings when asked if they have good self-esteem, people answer, but of course. in reality, when you are critical of yourself, there is no good self-esteem, neither when you feel envy, insecurity, resentment, jealousy, anger, hatred, in short….
5. be kind to your mind.
during my talks i ask participants, "yes, would you allow a garbage bag to be thrown in your living room? they immediately respond, no! then he asked again, "why do you put garbage in your brain? you do it when you feed negative thoughts, pain, guilt, resentment, envy, insensitivity, anxiety, hatred, bitterness, bitterness, laziness, stress, anger, rage, criticism, etc.. we are human, it is true and lovingly imperfect.
we can learn to love ourselves little by little. everyone on the planet can practice the four loves: love of god, love of self, love of nature, love of neighbor.
6. praise yourself
enter the hall of praise. when you feel overwhelmed, sad or criticized by others. i like to go to the hall of praise that i have imaginary created and give myself a bath of popularity. people think that's weird, but what's weird is not doing it. why not recognize how good we are?
7. practice meditation
the only thing you should do is to become aware of your breathing. Meditating is not a big deal. everyone can meditate at least two minutes a day. you could close your eyes and breathe consciously. let your mind relax.
8. listen to your intuition
without being aware sometimes we override what our sixth sense tells us. we all have them. it's just a matter of learning to listen to it.
9. don't do to others what you wouldn't want them to do to you
sometimes we want others to be fair, kind, loving, generous, understanding and understanding with us. but we are not aware that we have sowed in others…. we want others to change. but, we cannot change anyone. we can only change ourselves.
10. improve eating habits
balance the food. sometimes, in our eagerness to do everything, we dedicate little time to eat at the recommended time. it is important to look for nutritious food. have you observed how you eat? what thoughts do you have when you eat? in restaurants i observe people who are more concerned about their cell phones than about respecting that sacred space. others eat on the spur of the moment. neither good nor bad.
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empressofdiamonds · 26 days
At some point you read and read so many self improvement posts, that's amazing I do applaud that, but are you scared to put in the work, wanting to read more to make it "perfect" without failure? Delusional. Glowups aren't a perfect y=2x line, they're nasty, they're incredibly hard, it's confrontation of the raw self, the raw trauma, acceptance of oneself, understanding of our human nature and mind. You'll suffer, you'll scream your lungs out, you'll have huge challenges, but that's normal. Once it's over it's bliss. Now go for it, go work on it. Accept that you fucked up, accept that you sometimes gonna mess it up, but promise yourself you'll get back right up and go for it.
Promise yourself that you'll keep working at it, keep being consistent at it as much as you humanely can.
No amount of preparation gonna make your process without pain and challenges.
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adviceformefromme · 8 months
Less consuming, more creating. Imagine how much time wasted everyday spent consuming on social media, Netflix, movies, Youtube, Podcasts...mindless scrolling. Imagine if you poured all that wasted time and energy into creating the life of your dreams? Pouring into your business ideas? Creating that painting, that song, that dance whatever your thing is. And believe me, there is something within you, an idea, a gift, a skill that’s waiting to be unleashed, something you could be sharing with the world but instead you are wasting your life consuming. Now is your time to snap out of consuming, and create. Create with all your soul. It’s not a dumb idea, it's not delusional. Your dreams have been planted within you for a reason. Now is the fucking time more than ever to start living them, breathing them, and creating them.  
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boredgirlsclub · 1 year
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care for yourself and love every second of it
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hermajestyimher · 7 months
Hypergamy Is a Myth. Why "Leveling Up" Culture Should Not be Mixed with Hypergamy Tradwife.
Over the past few years I've been guilty of propping up and identifying with the hypergamous label. This was due to my belief at the time that the growing hypergamy online community had good intentions pertaining to the advancements of women's dating standards and therefore life. I saw how the levelling up community around me slowly but surely seemed to merge with the up-and-coming hypergamous online circles, which at the time I didn't question much and decided to go with their flow.
The idea of dating up, in theory, sounds very enticing, especially when we live in a society where straight women have very few decent options in terms of suitable mates, and where many women have had to go through traumatic situations with bottom of the barrel men in the past and who now want better for themselves.
On the surface, hypergamy sounds good. The issue for me began to arise after noticing people with ulterior agendas trying to weaponize the concept of hypergamy to sneak in female submission, negging, and overall brainwashing to strip women out of their personal agency and power in order to be "worthy" of being in a relationship with a wealthy man. "Never talk about your accomplishments, men don't care about them" "be quiet and dainty, expressing negative emotions is a masculine trait" "be highly agreeable and don't challenge your man, he's your head and leader" "being a domestic house wife is more fulfilling than being a career woman" "always be hyperaware of how the way you dress and express yourself comes across to men, you don't want to appear masculine!" "no man wants to be with an independent woman, being independent is masculine", among other onslaughts of misogynistic and sexist vitriol.
The sad part is that this sort of regressive content picked up a lot of esteem, especially among black "femininity" communities in places like YouTube and here on Tumblr since 2018, and in my opinion, paved the way for online incels and pick me to create this sub-culture that is based on the degradation of women and the expectations that we should go back to being second-class beings stripped our agency and humanity as used to happen decades and centuries ago, evident by the rise in podcasts and viral content of the sort in social media. It brought a novel movement that aimed for women to level up in their lives and grow as people to become saturated with content asking them to shrink themselves, to not take up too much space in order to not inconvenience the male ego.
The truth is that the vast majority of people marry within their social class. Rich men and educated men almost never marry women who are of lower social class and education, and this becomes particularly relevant with old-money individuals. Actual men of high value and class want their equivalent as a partner. The fantasy that a strong character, education, and professional achievements are not needed to attract quality men, and that they in fact might be counterproductive to it, is a lie from the pits of hell designed by misogynists to keep women dependent on men and to lower their personal agency. Any man that doesn't care for or feels threatened by your achievements is not a man you want to entertain.
The men that the women who refuse to chase a career or professional path date are almost never the kind of men they expected to attract based on the lies hypergamy has sold them, to begin with. So now they're stuck with an abusive partner that doesn't see or treat them like their equal and their options to rid themselves of that relationship are limited because they don't have the educational background or experience to stand on their own two feet. Is that really what want you for your life?.
If your goal is to date and marry a man of higher social status, you first need to raise above your own social status to put yourself in spaces where that potential partner could be and to seem desirable to them as well. This requires effort, nothing good in life comes easy (which is why the hypergamous wishful thinking is so popular among lazy and uneducated women, it makes them believe that they can easily have their lives solved with very little effort put on their part and at the expense of men).
We do not live in a Disney fantasy movie where prince charming will magically drop into your lap while you serve him as a waitress at a restaurant or while you watch videos online on how to be the best domestic wife. Instances of these sorts of scenarios are of one in a million. Levelling up should be always first about and for you, anything else that comes after you've bettered yourself is extra and that includes relationships. Levelling up should never be tainted by subjugation masqueraded as hypergamy, and hypergamy is largely a myth. The sooner you realize these things, the sooner you'll be able to call BS on the plethora of online propaganda spewed to keep you and other women dependent on men and you'll be able to raise above the brainwashing.
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lovilaa · 6 months
My Life🤍
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