#like a satisfied competitive edge kind of way

[animazed]

ngl fam

I smoked not too long ago and I am in a great and really nice mood

a really fun headspace, especially while listening to chill music and relaxing and unfazing my eyes

Just really relaxing and nice and happy

I need to do this more often man 😌

This is so fucking NICE (like serene and sweet and happy-awareness nice) and just happy and it is such an amazing mellow, happy frame of mind. No wonder people do this so much - it puts you in a nice frame-of-mind. I’d also totally destroy my life for this 24/7 all waking hours. So worth it to be feeling this

[rainrot4me]

Gently, Now

Summary: You have to show Eijiro how to be gentle.

Characters: Eijiro Kirishima x Female Reader

SMUT WARNING MINORS DNI

TW: Public fingering, under the table, fingering, embarrassment, deprivation, dildo, vaginal, eating out, begging, dub-con, power struggle, size difference

Words: 4.1k

Dating Eijiro was anything but gentle.

On the exterior, he was an all-around good guy: a good friend, a hard worker, and a strong upcoming hero - all the things you would expect from a loving guy like him. But what people didn’t see, what Eijiro so carefully hid behind closed doors, was someone completely different.

Eijiro and you had cultivated a kind of puppy love for the first couple of years at UA. Your crushes on each other had turned into nervous hand-holding and pecks on the cheeks whenever you got the chance. But as the months passed and your relationship became official, it was like you were dating someone else. 

Around others, Eijiro was normal. Always happy and willing to help whenever he could. So of course it would have been impossible to expect how different he would be when you two were alone together.

Kirishima was a full-fledged pervert. 

He was obsessed. Can’t keep his hands off of you, can’t avoid kissing every exposed inch of your skin. When someone’s too close, he’ll wrap his hand around your waist and pull you close, mumbling to you about how annoying people are. And don’t even mention when you two end up in a room alone together. He’ll be quick to push his tongue into your mouth, gripping your hair to hold you still, sharp teeth knicking against your lips. You end up pushed against whatever surface is closest and thick fingers are shoved between your folds, working desperately to hear your anxious voice as you try to keep quiet. It’s like a game to him. Your dignity means nothing as long as he can feel your skin against his, edging you to orgasm no less than three times every chance he gets. 

In the best way you could put it, it was exhilarating. There was nothing ever gentle about the way he made love to you, it was always a competition to see how many times he could make you cum compared to the last encounter. And, fuck, was he good at making you cum. After being together for a couple of years, Eijiro was well-acquainted with your body, knowing every spot that made you tingle against his lips, or just how to angle his cock to make you cum quickly, or even exactly how you liked your nipples sucked. He wasn’t always like this, but as his confidence and curiosity grew with you, he had little to no restraint with you anymore. Anything he wanted to try, you best believe he was going to whether you wanted him to or not. You had to wonder if it was all the pent-up energy from middle school. Not being popular didn’t give him an outlet to satisfy himself, so when he finally got a hold of you, it just sent him into a spiral. In turn, this made him insanely dominant. You never got a chance to take control in any situation as he was already on you, controlling your every movement. 

So when you were invited on a double date with Kaminari and Jiro, you were nervous about it already. It wasn’t that Eijiro wasn’t a good boyfriend, he really was. He was always looking out for you at school or on missions, buying you whatever you wanted, and taking great care of you no matter how he was feeling. Eijiro was everything you could’ve ever wanted. His only stint was the constant horniness he had that never seemed to dwindle. 

So as you rode in the passenger seat of his truck, speeding down the highway to the little restaurant the other couple had suggested, you held his wrist tightly, tugging it desperately. Eijiro watched the road carefully, his left hand gripping the wheel as his right was shoved between your thighs, fingers curling up into your soaked cunt. His thick fingers stretched you, your face flushed and hot as you frantically tried to catch your breath. “Eiji- Please… We’re almost there-” You begged, clamping your knees together tightly as you tried to pull his hand away. You were close already and knew that. He claimed constantly that when you were about to cum, your chest would heave frantically with your quick breathing, telling him exactly when to speed up and drive you over the edge. It was annoying how close he paid attention, but as an upcoming hero, you guessed it was only right. 

“Then I guess you’d better hurry up and cum then, huh?” He teased, jerking his palm against your clit and making you whine. You wrapped your arms around his large bicep, the thick muscles tensing as he curled his fingers deep. His veins were popping out nicely, your nails digging into his skin as you came around his fingers. You cried out, eyes clamping shut as you rode out your pleasure, gasping as he pulled out slowly and rubbed your clit for good measure. You let go of his hand, knees falling limp as you panted, eyes heavy. The bulge in his jeans was evident, but there was no time to worry about it as you tugged your panties and shorts back up, Eijiro pulled into the parking lot, and cars packed in as the fancy noodle restaurant was bumping. 

Pulling next to Jiro’s small car, you fixed your clothes, glancing at yourself in the mirror before Eijiro rounded the corner, opening the door for you and helping you out of his jacked-up red truck. His arm instantly slid behind you, giving your ass a nice squeeze before wrapping around your waist, walking you to the entrance. Your cunt was still throbbing, cheeks still red as you walked into the restaurant. Jiro waved you down, the couple sat in a booth in the back corner of the dimly lit restaurant. The place was busy, with staff and customers running around while the wonderful smell of noodles and seafood filled the air. 

“Hey, guys. Wait took forever but we finally got a table.” Jiro smiled as you both slid into the other side of the booth, Kaminari bumping fists with Eijiro. “Ah, sorry to make y’all wait.” You chimed, ignoring the conversation the boys were loudly having next to you. 

You felt good, Jiro gossiping about other classes and her work studies while the boys argued over which soccer team was going to win the Japanese championships. Your food eventually came, the ramen bowls you all ordered steaming and looking wonderful as you filled yourselves with food and good conversation. You were fairly surprised with Eijiro and how well he was behaving, checking on you occasionally but more interested in what Kaminari had to say about the new workout routine he was trying. It was nice. The dim lighting made Eijiro look tan, his thick arm muscles nice against his black t-shirt. He was a very beautiful man, and he was your man. 

Nodding to whatever Jiro was saying, you slid your arm around his, hooking your hand around his bicep as you both continued talking, smiling at the warmth. You liked intimate moments like this, the domestic things that reminded you just how much you loved him. You thought it was cute, but that was your mistake. As Eijiro’s arm slid off the table and down to grip your thigh, you gritted your teeth, knowing that you had caught his attention. His large hand gripped tight against your upper thigh, pinkie brushing against your clothed crotch and nudging against the fabric. You grit your teeth, trying desperately to close your thighs tight as Jiro turns to ask Kaminari something, giving you a chance to swat his hand. Eijiro glanced over, a small smirk on his mouth as he pressed his fingertips against your clothed clit, circling slowly. Your previously soaked panties rubbed against you, making your hips stutter as you stared daggers at him.

“Eiji-” You mumbled quietly, wrapping your hands around his forearm and pushing it, but there was no budge. He chuckled quietly, embarrassment growing against your cheeks. He was getting more brave, more daring. He never would have tried this a year ago, but you guessed comfortability has a way of showing people’s true colors. “Quiet.” He cooed, Kaminari refocusing his attention back to Eijiro and began talking exactly where they let off. Jiro excused herself to the bathroom, sliding across Kami’s lap and into the opposite end of the restaurant. You stiffened, leaning your head against Eijiro’s shoulder as his fingers refused to let up. You had no idea how Kaminari wasn’t noticing your heavy breathing or the tint on your cheeks, but you guessed the lighting in the room and his terrible attention span made it easier to hide. You gripped onto the large arm across your body, nails begging him to pull away as his hand slipped under your shorts. Eijiro’s fingers shoved your panties to the side, his fingertips sliding against your folds until you couldn’t take it anymore.

You spread your legs, letting his fingers slide against your entrance and press in, closing your eyes and pressing your face against his arm. You felt the vibration of Eijiro talking against his arm as you breathed in his scent, trying your damnest to stay quiet as his fingers stretched you. This was so wrong, but it felt so good. You sucked a breath in when he curled his fingers, gritting your teeth.

“[Y/N]?” Shit. You hadn’t realized Jiro had already slid back into the booth until she was questioning you, concern lacing her voice. You opened your eyes, looking at her with hot cheeks, gripping Eijiro’s arm tight. “She said she wasn’t feeling too great. Think we need to head out soon. Maybe get her home to lay down.” Eijiro answered, allowing your face to fall back against his arm and let out a heavy breath you were holding. His palm was nudging against your clit, his arm flexing ever so slightly but to anyone else, it would have just looked like he was rubbing your leg gently. Jiro voiced her concern, urging Kaminari to pay the tab as Eijiro tugged his hand out of your shorts, fingers slick with your arousal. He quickly wiped them on his jeans, helping you out of the booth as your knitted brows stared him down. He chuckled, wrapping his arm around your hips and hauled you to the truck, helping you inside. Jiro and Kaminari waved their goodbyes, mentioning something about ice cream before sliding into her car. 

As Eijiro slid into the driver’s seat and started the loud engine, you slapped his shoulder hard. He huffed a laugh, peeling out of the parking lot and back onto the highway. “Right in front of them? Seriously?” You groaned, your arousal still heavy in your abdomen as Eijiro’s hand slid to grip your knee. He smiled, glancing at you but quickly dropping it as you stared daggers into him. “That was uncalled for. You fucking horndog.” You spat, crossing your arms and knocking his hand off your knee. “Listen, babe-”

“Just drive, Eiji.” You huffed, staring out the window. The silence was loud. Eijiro kept to his side of the console and glanced nervously at you, making you feel bad. But this was for his good. Eijiro had no sense of understanding as to why his constant overpowering nature made you so anxious, always wondering why you didn’t enjoy it as much as he did. You were going to have to speak in a language he could understand. 

Pulling onto the UA campus, Eijiro followed you through the dorm building, waving to your classmates in his usual happy demeanour, but letting his anxiety show when he turned back to you. “[Y/N]...” He whined, reaching for your hand as you climbed the stairs but you pulled it away, ignoring him. You could feel the desperation as he loomed behind you, following you to your dorm. You pushed open the door, Eijiro quickly following you inside out of fear of being locked out. He tried to grab your hands, but you pulled back, closing the door and turning to him.

“Eiji.” You hissed, crossing your arms. If there was one thing Eijiro didn’t like it was you upset. Out of any circumstance, he would do whatever he could to make you feel better. But watching this large hero cower under your gaze and shrivel in on himself made you nervous, fidgeting your fingers. “On the bed, please.” You gritted, shuffling to your closet and pulling out a large shoebox. Eijiro slid to the bed nervously, sitting on the edge and leaning back, watching you nervously. 

When you opened the box, Eijiro’s face lifted, his toothy smile spreading across his tan face as he went to stand, but you glared him back down. The box was full of the various sex toys Eijiro had bought you over the time you had been together, any variety of vibrator or dildo you could think of. You pulled out the red rubber dildo that he had bought you shortly after you started officially dating, the size the closest thing to his he could find. It was slightly smaller than your forearm, the sheer girth of it making your knees weak, but so did Eijiro’s. You set the box back in the closet, tossing the dildo onto the bed and unbuttoning your shorts, sliding them down your legs. “What?” Kirishima smiled, watching closely as you tugged your shirt off, then your panties. He was getting excited again, his cock twitching in his jeans as he began to slowly rub himself. “Wanna try two at once again? That could be fun…” He trailed off, nervous as you left him unanswered and climbed onto the bed. 

You sat back against the headboard, Eijiro leaning forward to pursue you but you were quick to push him back, leaning him against the end of the bed opposite of you. You reached down, pulling his shirt off his head and unbuttoning his jeans, pulling his thick cock out and letting it sit. But Eijiro’s face dropped when you sat back, leaving his cock unattended as you grabbed the dildo, confusion striking him. 

You spit on the dildo lewdly, Eijiro’s face twisting with arousal as you rubbed it, moving it down to press against your entrance. Finally, looking him in the eyes, you pressed the tip against your entrance, eyeing him down. “If you touch yourself, I stop.” His face dropped, confusion replacing the aroused face he just sported. His cock still twitched. “If you touch me, I stop.” You commanded, pressing your knees apart and letting him get a good view of the dildo slowly entering you. You hissed, the stretch of the rubber making your lips part, trying to keep your composure. You could see his panic as he realized what was happening, the desperation beginning to build. 

“[Y/N]...” He whined, fisting the mattress while you pressed the hilt of the dildo, pushing the girth inside and stretching nicely. It was nowhere near the real thing, you hated to admit, but watching his face in awe as you fucked yourself on it made it all worth it. When you finally bottomed out, you hissed, the fullness making your cunt tighten and clit throb. You stared Eijiro in the eyes, his panicked expression making you smile as you began to grind your hips against the red rubber toy, the squishing sound echoing lewdly. 

It didn’t take much before he was leaning forward, desperately glancing between your face and your cunt while he whined. It was odd, seeing him so vulnerable. Eijiro was usually always the one in control, the one commanding you and pushing your every movement. But now that he wasn’t able to get his hands on you, he sat pitifully, hands wrapped in the sheets and gripping tightly. “Feels… amazing…” You sighed, lifting your feet off the bed and hooking your hand under your knee, spreading your legs to get a better angle on the dildo. You turned your face into the pillow, grinning and moaning as you fucked yourself slowly and deeply with the toy, letting Eijiro get a full view as he groaned. “Please…” He panted, climbing to his knees and shoving his jeans off, letting his cock sit angry and red. The tip was already leaking, begging to be touched as it twitched. You shook your head, bringing your hand down to rub your clit softly. “Ah, ah… Gotta show you how to be gentle… Not so rough, ah, all the time…” You cooed, nudging the dildo deep against your walls and relishing in the slowness of it all. Eijiro was always rough and fast, searching to make you cum quick instead of making you feel good. He never took his time, it was always a race for some reason. But, in your opinion, the best orgasms were the ones that were drawn out, nice and slow. You had to teach him, whether he liked it or not.

Grinding your hips, you smiled, sweat dripping across your brow as Eijiro sat between your open legs, staring hungrily. “See how I’m going slow? Taking my time? Ah- It feels so good, Eiji.” He glanced into your heavy eyes, pleading desperately as he ran his hands through his hair, gripping the spikes tightly as his chest heaved. He was flushed all over, skin hot to the touch as his cock squirmed, angrily twitching. 

The sight was all too much, his desperation making you moan loudly. Your walls clamped on the toy, fingers pressing deep against your clit as you came, arching your back as you pushed the toy flush inside you. Your lips hung open, loud moans and gasps falling as Eijiro gritted, his sharp teeth glinting. 

You couldn’t help yourself when you slid the toy out, the rubber glistening with your pleasure as you tossed it on the bed, running your fingers through your soaked folds. Eijiro watched hungrily, eyes burning into you as you still rubbed your clit, eyes heavy. “Now, can you-” 

“Yes, God, please, yes.” He spat out quickly, leaning forward expectantly. You grinned, spreading your legs wider as he nudged between them. “Then eat me out first.” You giggled, spreading your folds with your fingers and rubbing the slick against them. Eijiro was taken back, face slightly annoyed as he sat back, cock still angry. Reluctantly, he laid down, face first with your soaked cunt as he slid his arms around your thighs, digging his nails in tightly. “And be gentle.” You commanded, wrapping your arms around the pillow behind you. Eijiro nodded, eyebrows knitted as he leaned in, licking a thick stripe up. 

You sighed heavily, knees relaxing against his arms as he probed his tongue against your entrance, lapping at your pleasure. He was groaning, hips grinding down against the mattress as he lapped you up, eager to please you. He was already going too fast for your liking, so instead of just taking it, you slid your hands through his spiked hair, gripping hard until he hissed, pulling back. “I said gently.” You grumbled, letting his hair go as he swore, but dove back in nonetheless. This pace was much better, his tongue focused more on pressing deep and up instead of lapping quickly. It made you louder, your moans more sing-songy as he gripped your thighs, your hips moving in time with his eager tongue. 

Before you knew it you were squirming, fingers clamped around your nipples as Eijiro ate you out so wonderfully. His tongue curled up, pressing against your velvet walls and moaning at how sweet you tasted. He was so into it, so inclined to make you feel good he couldn’t hear you as you told him to slow down or begged him to be gentle. You pressed back, back arching as you tried to slide away, but his strong arms just held you so closely, ignoring any pleas you had. This is how it normally went, Eijiro’s brute strength approach to sex overriding any fuzzy urges you wanted to fulfill. So as you clamped around his tongue, crying into the back of your hand as you came, you were pushing him away. Eijiro wiped the slick from his mouth, smiling before he saw your angry face, sitting back. “Babe-”

You shoved his shoulders back, climbing on top of him and straddling his hips. His cock twitched against your ass, the still untouched head was red and angry. You crossed your arms as you towered over him, slick cunt pressed down against his abdomen. “If you can’t do what I say, then I’m just gonna have to do it myself.” You snarled, lifting your hips and gripping his cock, a sharp hiss leaving his lips as you nudged it against your entrance. “And don’t even think about touching me.” 

Eijiro gritted his teeth, hands fisting the sheets as you nudged his cock inside of you, the stretch a little easier from the dildo. You moaned, the length twitching inside of you until you bottomed out, sighing at the fullness. His skin was hot under you, his hips trying desperately to buck up but you stayed down, forcing his stillness. Only when you decided to begin grinding, did you. You placed your hands against his chest, angling your hips down as you rode him slowly, relishing in the way the fullness wasn’t jabbing into you for once. “Fuck, babe…” Eijiro whined, fingers gripping tightly as his hips begged to move. You smiled lazily, clit throbbing as you ground down, his head pressing against your fucked-out walls. You were so sensitive, but that was what made it feel so good. You whined, bottom lip slipping between your teeth and chewing. You lifted your hips slowly, pulling the length out of you before sinking back down the same, all at your own pace. Eijiro was a whining mess, every other sound a quiet beg to let him touch you or even more his hips. His feet were sliding behind you, pressing down against the mattress until you felt like he was going to break it.

You sat back, hands gripping his knees as you slid up his length, sighing at the way it tugged against your cunt. “Gotta show you how to fuck properly.” You grinned, nudging your hips up and down slowly as you began to ride him better. You were already getting exhausted, your body worn out from the previous orgasms wrecking your cunt. You stared Eijiro in his flushed face, brows knitted and teeth gritted as he tried his best not to move, not to disappoint you. 

“Eiji.” You sighed, grinding your hips down. He perked up, eyes shooting to yours as he whined. “Do you think, ah… Think you can be good now and go slow?” He nodded frantically, shooting his hands to your hips and gripping down hard. “Yes, yes, please… Fuck-” That’s all it took for you to lean forward, pressing your chest against his and pressing your lips against him. You both closed your eyes, Eijiro’s large hands running down to grip your ass, tugging the mounds apart as he began to slowly thrust up into you. “I’ll be good, I- ah, I will…” He mumbled as your head pressed into his shoulder, kissing gently. Your skin was hot against his, sweat dripping as he thrust lazily into you, more worried now about sinking deeper than going quick. You moaned loudly, cunt throbbing as he pressed against your walls, sensitivity rushing you. 

“So good, Eiji- So good…” You clung to him, strong arms wrapping tightly around you until you were moaning loudly, cumming hard around his girth. Eijiro cursed loudly, pressing his face against your shoulder as he sunk deep, walls clenching tightly around him. He didn’t have time to pull out, his orgasm already racking him as he buried inside and came hard. He painted your sensitive walls, filling you wonderfully before sliding out. You groaned at the way his seed leaked between your folds, the warmth making you shudder.

Holding you close, Eijiro panted, you still catching your breath as he wiped your hair from your sweaty forehead. “I’m sorry…” He grunted, kissing your forehead gently. “I’ll get you a plan b… and flowers, for being such a douche.” 

You giggled, nudging your face against his neck and smiling, face still hot against his skin. 

“I forgive you. But please, no more of that in front of our friends.” 

Eijiro laughed, rubbing you back as he apologized some more. But how could you stay mad at a boyfriend as sweet as him?

This was an anonymous request!

Comments and reblogs are appreciated! 𐚁₊⊹

[ukiiseikou]

don't mess up, my lucky charm, my last chance.

wanderer x gn! reader. figure skating au.

synopsis: your pairs partner just ghosted you, but no worries! your coach manages to replace him with the next worst thing - wanderer. a/n: hi! making this a series called complementary figures, a figure skating au universe. stay tuned for other characters ^^ thanks for reading

“hi, i’d like to report a missing person’s case.”

ayaka looks up from unlacing her skates, giving you a sympathetic smile, “any news?”

“he’s gone gone, like, poof! i’ve been calling him ever since he disappeared two weeks ago but it’s like he never existed. i even called the police, and all they could say was ‘he’s still alive’, like buddy, i hope so.”

ayaka stands up, offering you a quick hug, “i’m so sorry, it was an asshole move for him to ghost you like this in the middle of the season.”

“it’s fine. i guess it’s all over now. still kind of in shock, but whatever.”

you sigh, sitting down on the bench and kicking off your sneakers as you pull your skates out from your bag. you weren’t even sure why you were here, your partner had up and left you in the middle of the competition season and you can’t perform a pairs routine by yourself. you were content to just wallow in self pity and refreshing instagram to see if, miraculously, any available pairs guy would contact you and ask to try out. in fact, you had been doing exactly that for the past few week and a half, but yae asked you to come in today, saying that you ‘needed to reconnect with the ice’.

you wave bye to ayaka as she walks away, leaving you to your own devices as you start pulling on the strings of your laces.

“y/n.”

yae appears before you, and you strain to get a look at her, a familiar grin on her face.

“hi, coach, what’s up?” you finish tying up your skates and stand up. with your skate, you tower over yae just a little bit, but you always felt like a little kid before her - she’s been your coach since you were little anyway, alongside your former partner.

“no news?” 

you shake your head, and she sighs.

“disappointing, but no matter, we move ahead.”

she beckons you to follow her, and you trail behind her as she steps onto the ice gracefully. you’ve been off ice for about a week now, and you really feel it. there’s a bundle of nerves as you slowly follow her in a lap around the rink, is this where yae tells me my pairs career is over?

“what do you think about getting a new partner?” she stops suddenly, and you nearly crash into her, lost in your thoughts.

“um, if there’s someone out there who wants me?” you offer awkwardly.

she laughs, “well, he better, you’re his last chance.”

“wait, you’re saying someone asked to partner up with me?”

she taps her chin, “it’s more like - i offered and no one else wanted him, so we’re his only choice.”

she finishes with a self satisfied grin, “don’t worry, y/n dear, he’s won a few medals.”

“yeah? like what?”

“world championships, world cup finals,” she lists off a bunch of titles, including national champion.

wait, national champion?

“are you talking about, uh, wanderer?” you interrupt her.

“is that the kid's name? ah, i forgot. he always hissed at me and ran away whenever i went over to ei’s house.”

while yae launches into reminiscing about her shared history with his coach, your mind goes a mile a minute.

wanderer, national champion, current world champion, former junior world record holder, and current world-renowned asshole.

no one can deny his talent and skills, but also that comes with a major attitude. you’ve heard changing room horror stories about him scaring off potential partners; people leaving in tears; a world record in the number of partners dropped; and if he drops you in the middle of a lift it’s not his fault - it’s yours.

“yae, why in the world did you offer to pair me up with some asshole?” you blurt out, “yae, i thought you liked me.”

 “oh look, they’re here!”

yae pointedly ignores your comment and pushes past you, making her way to the edge of the rink. you can feel the drilling stare, even with your back facing him. you just prayed to whatever archon is listening that he didn’t hear you, and you would at least leave this temporary partnership with your ego and self-confidence intact.

“ei! long time no see,” yae stops at the boards, as you slowly turn on your blades and skate towards where the pair is waiting.

“this is y/n,” she beckons you, and you pick up the pace, gliding into place next to her.

“hi, uh, it’s nice to meet you!” you’ll try your best to leave a good impression on his coach, at least.

“likewise,” ei nods and holds out a hand to shake, which you take.

“kunikuzushi,” she angles her head towards you, “say it.”

“hey,” he says curtly, avoiding your gaze. awkward silence settles over the group before yae claps her hands.

“i see. kuni, then? i see your skates are on, good! get up here. y/n, sweetheart, can you get my phone please? i would like to film this, thank you.”

you sigh, moving to grab yae’s phone on the other side of the boards. you watch the boy pull off his skate guards and step onto the ice out of the corner of your eye. you can’t deny it - you can tell by the way he holds himself that he’s far more elegant and well-trained than half of the guys you’ve seen come in and out of the rink door. the two of you make eye contact and you quickly fumble with yae’s phone, placing it near her hand.

ei and yae are chatting, leaving you to awkwardly follow wanderer, or kuni, or kunikuzushi, you weren’t really sure what to call him anymore.

“can you even skate?” he sounds irritated, and you bristle.

“of course i can, can you?” you retort.

“i’m the current world champion. of course i can. are you dumb?” he whirls around to face you.

“yeah? try doing that again without a partner,” you fume.

“i don’t need a partner to win.”

“it’s called fucking pairs.”

he snorts, “and you think your mediocre skills can keep up with me?”

“sorry, but i happen to hear you switch partners every season? you need me. admit it, i’m your last chance, because nobody else is stupid enough to partner up with someone like you.”

“someone like me? it’s okay! you can just call me an asshole again, just to my face. go on.” 

you stop, skates slowing to a halt, you can feel your face heating up at the reminder of the less-than-kind comment you made only a few moments ago. ah, fuck, he heard me.

his eyes narrow at your silence, and he whirls around again and kicks off, throwing ice in your direction and he leaves you behind.

“y/n, honey, you’re supposed to skate with him! don’t tell me you forgot after a week already!” 

you hear yae call from the boards, and you roll your eyes.

you race to catch up to him, but he ignores you. 

“okay, fine! i’m sorry! but like - prove me wrong!”

he turns at you with a strange look in his eyes that you can’t really place. before you can get a closer look, yae yells at you to ‘do a spin or something!’

he grabs your hand, grumbling something under his breath as he slows to match your strokes.

“do you know how to do triple salchow?” he questions over the sound of blade scratching ice.

“side-by-side? i mean, i can try!”

he rolls his eyes at you, but he releases your hand, “you go first, i’ll follow.”

wait, shouldn’t we talk about this?

you nearly stop your momentum but you catch how he’s staring intently at you. your insides squeeze together, your partner could never do a salchow properly, so you haven’t done it in a long ass time.

okay, fine.

you adjust your position, and you can hear his skates against the ice as well, perfectly mirroring your position as you launch yourself into the air.

there’s a foreign feeling in your legs, and next you know it, you end up hitting the ground, legs giving out as you slip and land. wanderer snickers as he slows to a halt next to you, and you just know he landed that triple salchow perfectly.

"not only did you double it, but you also fell on your ass? some skating skills you have."

you fell a thousand times before, but this one stings. you wince as you hang your head, trying to figure out if the dull throb in your leg is anything serious.

"are you crying? archons, i can't believe i have a crybaby of a partner." he sighs, but twists to get a better look at your face. you turn away from him.

"i'm fine," you say, pulling yourself to your feet, there's a shit-eating grin on your face, "let's try that again, partner."

he scoffs, "should've known you were pretending. can't deal with crybabies. you're lucky i'm giving you a second chance."

"watch this one. their debut internationally, the new wonder pair from inazuma. their chemistry is electrifying, and their technical content is one of the best!"

you let out a dry laugh of amusement at the commentators as you splay out across the couch, taking up all the space. wanderer hisses at you to 'get off me' but makes no move to shove your legs off his lap, instead, he grabs the remote from the coffee table to fast forward through the gushing that takes place before you've even entered your beginning pose, eyebrows drawn in irritation.

the two of you watch intently, the bright lights of yae's TV cutting through the darkness of the night combined with tightly drawn curtains. wanderer lets out a snort when you nearly crash into the ground as you land from your throw lutz, only saving it with a ridiculously bent knee that keeps you upright.

"still not used to the height?" he smirks.

"shut up, you're lucky i saved that," you spit. it's true, despite his shorter stature, he's hiding some serious muscle, enough to throw you into the air with height that looks like 'he's trying to send you to the moon' - as the commentators put it. your former partner never threw you that high up, and when you first did it, you felt as if you were in the air for an eternity.

"hah! no. you're lucky i held back."

"let's just call it even," you sniffle, turning back to watch the replay. after months of skating together, you know his little quirks, and when you shake with mock tears he stiffens, and you know you've actually got him wrapped around your finger. when you first actually cried in front of him (after a particularly ugly fall that felt like a broken bone), he spent his time saying that you 'looked ugly when you cry' and holding up tissues to your nose, but you can tell by his eyes his worry when the tears won't stop coming despite his irritated sighs and non-stop shaking of his head.

"whatever," he pats your ankle with a sense of urgency, the sofa creaking as he throws off your legs to stand up, "keep those ankles of steel safe, lucks, you'll need it."

you watch as he moves to ransack yae's fridge, and he sticks his face into the cool air in a desperate bid to stop the red crawling across his face. you're left quiet on the couch, an indescribable feeling racing up your neck at the nickname.

you tune out yae's usual pep talk as you survey the crowd - the arena's more packed than usual, and you're feeling the pre-program jitters. 

wanderer's hand finds your's, giving you a tight squeeze.

"you ready?"

you turn to smile at him, and he returns a rare one, "with you? always."

he snorts, but turns his head away as red tinges the tip of his ears, "don't mess up."

(and, by the way, thanks for giving me a chance back then.)

maybe i will write one where wanderer meets your ex-partner anyways, ♡ or ↻ if you enjoyed, support your writers, thank you!!

[marsplastic13]

'Complicated' (Part 2) - Kaz Brekker x reader

Idea - Kaz Brekker hires a prostitute to overcome his touch aversion, and be a better man for Inej, but things take an unxepected turn.

Pairing: Kaz Brekker x Prostitute!Reader, (had to use y/n because I'm bad at names)

Genre: modern AU, slow burn

word count: 5.5k

notes: please let me know what you think <3

Finally, a couple of days later, Inej arrived in Ketterdam. Kaz waited for her at the harbor, hoping she would throw herself into his arms and that he could finally hug her tightly. Instead, their greetings were far more reserved, though her wide smile still managed to warm him up in seconds.

She had many people to see, so they didn’t have the chance to be alone until late at night. When they finally had a moment together, they settled on his couch to watch a movie. Kaz desperately wanted to show her the progress he had made, but he felt a familiar sense of hesitation.

After battling with himself, he finally removed his gloves, meeting her surprised gaze as he slowly reached for her hand. Inej's eyes lit up, and Kaz couldn't suppress a small, satisfied smile.

During those days, they managed to stay closer than they had ever been before. Inej divided her time between her place and his, and their evenings together became a cherished routine.

One night, they watched the Masterchef finale on his bed. Inej lay with her head in his lap, and Kaz gently caressed her hair. y/n had been right— Inej was loving it. Kaz didn’t think much about y/n, except occasionally when he caught her Instagram stories. He had considered writing to her to comment on the winner of the cooking competition, as they had both been rooting for the same contestant. Kaz had his phone in his hand, while the other was scratching Inej’s head. She made a satisfied hum, closing her eyes, distracting Kaz from his thoughts about y/n. He tossed the phone away, focusing entirely on Inej.

A few days later, Kaz received a notification of a picture from y/n. It was a photo of different shades of nail polishes. He chuckled, circled the one he liked, and sent the picture back. “What’s that smile?” Inej asked, surprised, from the other side of the table where they were having lunch.

“Jesper sent a stupid thing,” Kaz lied effortlessly, though not without a pang of guilt. He felt a momentary sense of relief that Inej hadn't probed further, but the guilt lingered, gnawing at the edges of his contentment.

Kaz couldn't escape the irony of his situation. Here he was, trying to overcome his touch aversion with a prostitute, someone paid to be physically close to him, while desperately wanting to be intimate with Inej, who was going around the world saving girls from being sold as prostitutes. The contradiction gnawed at him, twisting his gut every time he thought about it. How could he reconcile these two opposing realities?

Inej had dedicated her life to freeing those trapped in the same circumstances that had led Kaz to y/n. She was a beacon of hope, a relentless force for good, while Kaz's actions seemed to undercut everything she stood for. The more he pondered this, the deeper his guilt grew. It wasn't just about the physical interactions with y/n; it was about what those interactions represented. He was using someone else to cope with his trauma, someone who might have been in a position similar to the girls Inej fought so hard to save.

Kaz found himself replaying his conversations with y/n. She had been understanding, patient, even kind. They had laughed together, and she had helped him in ways he hadn't thought possible. Yet every time he saw Inej's face, radiant with purpose and conviction, he felt like a fraud. How could he face her, knowing the truth?

***

Inej found out about the chocolate and wine tasting thing and thought it would be hilarious to go to make fun of the people there. They were enjoying the experience, their laughter a shared secret, when he spotted y/n entering the restaurant, her arm wrapped around a guy. It was the same guy from the club—the one she had said she stopped seeing because they weren't compatible.

As she scanned the room, y/n's eyes locked with Kaz's. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, hoping she wouldn’t approach. But she did, her face a mix of shock and recognition. She made her way to their table, her expression quickly morphing into an enthusiastic smile.

"I'm so sorry to bother you, I'm such a fan! I watch all of your TikToks," she said to Inej, her voice bright and sincere.

Inej stood up, her smile as warm as ever. "Thank you! It's always nice to meet a fan," she replied, extending her hand.

They chatted for a bit, with y/n telling Inej how her videos had inspired her to take up pilates, which was only half-true. y/n had actually taken up the sport because, as she had once humorously told Kaz, a client had requested an intricate position, that she accurately acted out for him, that resulted in her pulling a few muscles, forcing her to stay in bed for days.

"Can you take a picture of us?" y/n asked, handing her phone to Kaz. His heart pounded as he took the phone, trying to maintain a neutral expression. As he snapped the photo, his eyes fell on y/n’s hand resting on Inej’s shoulder, her nails painted the color he had chosen. It took all his self-control not to react.

"There you are, always running around with this one," said the guy, approaching them and wrapping his arm around y/n’s waist. "Baby, that's Inej Ghafa!"

"Oh right, the girl you yap about all day?" he laughed, pulling her close.

"I don't yap," she pouted playfully.

"Sure you don't," he said, kissing her pout.

Kaz couldn’t figure out what he was feeling. He wondered how much time they were spending together and didn't like how carelessly the guy was able to kiss her. He wondered if she still tasted like cherries.

"I'm sorry for the interruption," y/n said, pulling away from the kiss. "It was really nice to meet you, Inej."

They walked back to their table, the guy's hand slipping from her waist to rest on her ass, guiding her to her seat. Kaz's jaw tightened, and he forced himself to look away. The rest of the evening was uneventful, and fortunately, y/n and her companion were out of his sight.

As Kaz and Inej returned to their conversation, his thoughts kept drifting back to y/n. The guilt gnawed at him, and he couldn't help but wonder how Inej would react if she knew the truth. Would she understand his reasons, or would she see it as a betrayal? The irony of his situation was inescapable—trying to overcome his touch aversion with a prostitute, while being with someone who fought against the very thing he was exploiting.

***

A few days later, Inej had to leave again, promising to return in a few months. Kaz stood at the harbor, watching her ship prepare to depart. He managed to brush his lips against hers for the briefest moment, and she smiled widely at him, her eyes full of warmth and promise. That smile stayed with him, a bittersweet memory as he watched the ship sail away.

Each time Inej left, Kaz felt an embarrassingly deep sense of loss, a hollowness that settled in his chest. Jesper, ever the loyal friend, had to break into his house just to convince him to show up at work. It had become a routine, a cycle of anticipation, brief happiness, and then the inevitable slump into solitude.

During the weeks Inej had been with him, Kaz had experienced a closeness he hadn't thought possible. They had shared quiet moments on his couch, watched movies, and even engaged in playful banter about the contestants on Masterchef. It was during those moments, when he held her hand without gloves or caressed her hair as she rested her head in his lap, that he realized just how far he had come. But it also made him think about all the things he still wanted to try, the progress he wanted to make.

The weeks with Inej had stirred something in him, a desire to push further, to explore more. He wanted to test the boundaries of his progress, to see if he could translate the tentative intimacy he had shared with Inej into something more confident. So, he decided to book y/n for the first free time she had.

***

“Hello, lovebird,” she smirked as she opened the door, making him enter her room. “How was girlfriend-time?”

Kaz rolled his eyes at the nickname but couldn't help the small smile tugging at his lips. “Fine.”

“Anything interesting to tell?” she asked, sitting on the bed and patting the space next to her. Kaz hesitated for a moment before joining her.

“Well, uh, I held her hand, scratched her head like you suggested, thanks for that. And we kissed.” He felt a bit guilty discussing these intimate moments so casually, as if they were just part of his homework.

Her eyes sparkled with intrigue. “Let's talk about this kiss,” she said, leaning in closer. Out of habit, she climbed onto his lap, her arms bare and exposed. Kaz hesitated, unsure of where to place his hands, before slowly resting them on her covered thighs.

“Well, it was fast and light,” he admitted, feeling the familiar awkwardness settle in.

“Don't minimize it, Kaz! It's wonderful! Bet you got all sorts of ideas,” she grinned, nudging his nose with hers playfully.

“Kind of,” he laughed nervously, the warmth of her proximity making him slightly more at ease.

“So? What do you want to do next?” she asked, her voice softening as she sensed his unease.

“I was thinking of sticking with making kisses bearable, and then, since summer is coming, it’s time for more skin exposure.” It still felt strange to talk about these things as if they were just mechanical actions, devoid of the emotional weight they carried.

“Rock my world, Brekker,” y/n murmured as she rested her head on his bicep. The position was perfect for a kiss, her head angled just right. Kaz leaned in, brushing their lips together. He repeated the motion several times, leaning in, pulling back, lingering a second longer each time.

"You're cute when you're focused," she commented, making him shake his head and laugh nervously. Kaz could feel her breath on his mouth, and it felt oddly normal. He wanted to deepen the kiss but felt embarrassed, so he moved to her cheek instead.

“Can you… can you kiss… me?” he stammered, feeling the prolonged contact start to make him dizzy. They swapped positions, and Kaz found himself resting his head on her lap. “Stop me whenever you want,” she said before kissing his forehead.

Kaz released a shaky breath, nothing ever feeling better than that small kiss. y/n continued, leaving a trail of tender kisses around his face. “This is so sweet I could cry,” she whispered at a certain point.

“Please don’t,” he laughed, blushing.

He felt particularly good, encouraged by everything he had managed to do with Inej and ready to push his boundaries further. y/n passed her hand through his neatly combed hair, raising his head to kiss the corner of his lips. Kaz felt the familiar anxiety rise, but his starved body craved more, so he didn’t move. He stood still as she kissed his full lips, but he stopped her hand before she could cup his face.

Kaz held her hand to his chest as if it were as his life depended on it while she urged him to deepen the kiss. He forced himself to let her in, feeling her tongue searching for his. His body tensed, but she murmured against his lips, “Breathe, Kaz.”

He took her advice, trying to steady himself. When their tongues touched, he felt a wave of nausea, but she was quick, distracting him with her hand still in his hair. y/n kept teasing him, never fully kissing him. His body was torn between fear and newfound desire. At some point, he couldn't take it anymore. Kaz tangled his hands into her hair and pulled her in for a deep kiss. He let himself feel their tongues sliding against each other. In that moment, the entire building could go up in flames and he would have preferred staying there, burning alive, instead of leaving her mouth. Her cherry lip balm was intoxicating. 

He felt her hands on his chest and cursed himself for not being able to telepathically tell her to let her hands slip to his neck and pull him closer. The kiss went on, and he was unable to let go, feeling as though he could drown but nothing bad would happen as long as her lips were on his. A small moan escaped her mouth, and Kaz was pulled back into reality so violently that he had to get up.

He grounded himself by pacing around, releasing heavy breaths. “That… was a great kiss,” she commented, nodding. Kaz was unsure if she was talking to him or to herself. 

Kaz stopped pacing and leaned against the wall, trying to regain his composure. The intensity of the kiss had left him shaken but also strangely satisfied. He looked at y/n, who was still sitting on the bed, her lips slightly swollen from their kiss. He couldn’t help but wonder what Inej would think of all this, but he pushed the thought aside, focusing on the progress he had made.

Only in that moment did Kaz realize how his body had reacted to the kiss, feeling his face change shade with embarrassment. “Well, must've been good even for you,” y/n remarked, letting her eyes linger on him. “Come on, there's no need to be ashamed. It's natural,” she shrugged, offering a reassuring smile.

“I'm not... uhm, used to this,” Kaz admitted, sitting in a chair far from her and avoiding her gaze.

“I am, so don't worry, lov— Kaz,” she corrected herself, sensing his discomfort.

He continued to blush, silently praying for his body to calm down. “We have some more time, can we just... talk?” he asked, trying to shift the focus away from the lingering awkwardness.

The girl nodded, seeming relaxed as she settled back into the chair. “So, you're back with that guy?” Kaz asked casually, hoping to steer the conversation into more neutral territory.

She wrinkled her nose. “I just wanted to eat chocolate, drink wine, and have sex,” she shrugged nonchalantly. “I mean, he couldn't make me come even if his life depended on it, but his—”

Kaz interrupted her quickly, feeling uncomfortable with where the conversation was heading. “y/n, oversharing,” he remarked with a hint of exasperation.

“Sorry, sorry,” she snorted, realizing her misstep.

“Why do you keep going out with him?”

“Not everyone finds the love of their life on the first try, Kaz,” she replied with a shrug. “Some of us have to go on bad dates and have bad sex.”

Kaz never explicitly thought of Inej as the love of his life, but he had never entertained thoughts about anyone else either. The idea of her potentially leaving him someday made his stomach sink, a feeling he wasn't accustomed to.

“See you Wednesday?” he asked, trying to sound nonchalant despite the knot in his stomach.

“I haven't told you? A client is taking me away for a week,” she replied, a mischievous grin spreading across her face. “He has, like, a lawyer conference or something. Can't fucking wait. Five-star hotel and all. He's promised me spa treatments, fancy dinners, and shopping. It's going to be awesome.”

Kaz studied her smile, suddenly realizing that she probably had some form of relationship not just with him, but with other clients as well. The thought unsettled him deeply, stirring a mix of jealousy and discomfort he hadn't anticipated. He couldn't shake the image of her with other men, indulging in luxurious trips and intimate moments, all while maintaining a professional demeanor.

Deciding it was time to go, he stood up abruptly. His mind was racing with conflicted thoughts—feelings of possessiveness he hadn't known he harbored, mixed with a stark reminder that their interactions were transactional at their core. As he made his way to the door, he struggled to maintain his composure, his gaze lingering on her for a moment longer than intended.

***

Kaz kept watching her Instagram stories, each post depicting scenes of luxury and leisure—tanning by a pool, sipping cocktails at parties, early morning runs at sunrise, and romantic beach strolls at sunset. It baffled him why he felt such a surge of anger. They didn't know each other well; she never shared personal details. Yet, there he was, on a lonely Sunday night, a bottle of alcohol his only companion, staring at another picture of her in a stunning dress against a breathtaking backdrop.

The alcohol only fueled his frustration. How could she just leave, especially when he felt they were making progress? In a moment of impulse, he opened his banking app and took a screenshot of a money transfer ready to be confirmed—3000 kruge. 'Come back?' he typed beneath the screenshot, hesitating momentarily before hitting send.

The next morning, the hangover hit him hard, along with the realization of what he had done. Regret flooded in as he replayed the scene in his mind. Sending money felt like a desperate move, one that exposed his vulnerability more than he was comfortable admitting.

Throughout the day, he constantly checked his phone, hoping for a response that didn't come. He cursed himself for acting on impulse, for letting his emotions drive him to such a reckless gesture. Deep down, he knew it wasn't about the money—it was about wanting her presence, her company, even if it was just for a fleeting moment.

As the day wore on, he wrestled with conflicting emotions—anger at himself for being so impulsive, frustration at her for leaving without a word, and a gnawing sense of loneliness that seemed to deepen with each passing hour. 

***

Kaz sat in his car beneath her apartment building, grappling with embarrassment over his drunken text. He stared at the glowing screen of his phone, contemplating whether to turn the car around and head home. He knew he should, but something pushed him to go upstairs despite the awkwardness he felt. His injured leg throbbed uncomfortably with each step, almost as if it, too, protested the decision.

Entering her apartment, Kaz settled onto the familiar couch, listening to the sounds emanating from y/n's room until it was his turn. As they settled on her bed, y/n kept her arms crossed, her expression expectant, while Kaz avoided meeting her gaze.

"Kaz, what was that?" she finally asked, her tone a mix of curiosity and concern.

"y/n, I don't know. I was drunk and..." He trailed off, unsure how to justify his actions when even he didn't fully understand them.

"Kaz, if you're catching feelings for me..." she started, but he cut her off firmly.

"I'm not," he asserted, though his words rang hollow in his own ears.

Her gaze softened, and she reached out, her hand finding his. "If that's the case, you shouldn't be embarrassed. What we're doing is... intimate and sweet. It would be normal to mistake it for something more."

"I'm not doing anything, just a drunk text," Kaz repeated, the words feeling inadequate even as he said them.

"If you ever do, you have to let me know," she said softly, her thumb brushing against his hand. "You gave me your first proper kiss, Kaz. It's normal to be confused."

"I'm doing this for my girlfriend, who I love very much," he replied hastily, trying to sound more confident than he felt.

"I know, but if it makes you uncomfortable, we shouldn't see each other anymore," she replied, her voice tinged with understanding.

They spent the next hour making out, Kaz finding it difficult to let go of y/n's hair. He wanted to explore more, but it all felt too overwhelming. y/n tried to touch his arms and chest, but he had to stop her before it became too much. He managed to leave a few chaste kisses on her neck, but when she tried to reciprocate, he almost lost control, so they focused on their lips and faces.

y/n shamelessly moaned into his mouth, and even Kaz couldn't help but let a few sounds escape his lips. Just as the intensity between them peaked, a hard knock on the door made them spring apart, the first time they had done so in many minutes.

"y/n, you're late!" one of her roommates protested from outside, breaking the charged atmosphere.

They looked at each other with wide eyes, suddenly aware of the time. Kaz checked his phone and realized he was supposed to have left thirty minutes ago. A nervous laugh escaped them both, neither daring to meet the other's gaze.

"I should go," Kaz finally said, shifting uncomfortably and avoiding eye contact. "I think I need a minute," he added, his face flushing with embarrassment while y/n smirked, a hint of satisfaction in her expression.

Kaz insisted on leaving extra money for the additional time they had spent together. "There's no need to, we got carried away," y/n protested, but Kaz was resolute.

"Does this happen often?" he asked curiously, a cocky smile playing on his lips.

"No," she admitted quietly.

"Then take these," Kaz said firmly, leaving the money on her desk before swiftly exiting the apartment, the weight of their encounter heavy on his mind as he made his way back to his car.

Kaz entered the Crow Club, his mind heavy with the events of the previous hour. "You are so late, Brekker," Jesper commented, raising an eyebrow. "I had to say you had the flu."

Kaz shrugged, collapsing into the chair next to him. "Where were you?" Jesper pressed, a suspicious edge to his voice.

"I had stuff to do," Kaz replied casually, pulling out his phone to reply to the messages from Inej that had accumulated throughout the day.

Jesper leaned in, sniffing the air. "Why do you smell of cherries?" he asked, his nose crinkling as he leaned closer.

Kaz shoved him away, hoping to sound convincing. "I don’t smell of cherries. What the fuck?"

Jesper narrowed his eyes, not easily fooled. "Are you cheating on Inej?" he asked abruptly, his tone sharper than usual.

Kaz's heart skipped a beat. "What? Jesper, come on. I can’t even touch people," he said, avoiding Jesper's gaze.

Jesper hummed, skepticism clear in his expression. "You’re weird, man. I’m telling you. And you've been acting stranger than usual lately," he added, his eyes searching Kaz's face for any signs of deceit. "Your clothes, they don't look like you've been working. More like you've been... elsewhere."

Kaz shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "I had things to take care of. It's not what you think."

Jesper's eyes narrowed further. "And what am I supposed to think, Kaz? You're disappearing for hours, coming back smelling like cherries, and acting all shifty. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were up to something."

Kaz's mind raced, trying to find a plausible explanation that would satisfy Jesper's growing suspicion. "It's complicated, Jesper. Just trust me."

Jesper crossed his arms, not letting it go. "Complicated how? You're not giving me much to trust here. You owe me more than just 'stuff to do.'"

Kaz clenched his jaw, feeling the pressure of Jesper's scrutiny. "I'm handling things, okay? Personal things. It's nothing you need to worry about."

Jesper's eyes stayed locked on Kaz, clearly not convinced. "Personal things, huh? Well, I hope for your sake, and Inej's, that whatever you're doing is worth all this secrecy. Because if it blows up in your face, don't say I didn't warn you."

Kaz sighed, the weight of Jesper's suspicions adding to his already heavy burden. "Noted, Jesper. Noted."

Jesper watched him for a moment longer before shaking his head and walking away, leaving Kaz to his thoughts. The encounter left Kaz feeling even more unsettled, the realization that he was not only lying to himself but also to his closest friends gnawing at him. He needed to get a grip on his emotions and focus, before everything he was working for crumbled around him.

***

He didn't see her at the Crow Club on Friday night, and it made him restless. He had seen from her Instagram stories that she was heading out. Did he hope she would show up at his club? Maybe. Was he glaring at the entrance, waiting for her? Absolutely.

As he changed spots, he saw that she posted another story. It took all his strength to wait a few minutes before looking at it. She was tagging the Emerald Palace. The only things preventing Kaz from throwing his phone against the wall were the facts that he was in public and that his phone was already hanging on for dear life.

He decided to turn his phone off for the night, and probably for the next 24 hours. If anything in her stories suggested that Pekka Rollins was her client, he knew he would lose it completely. A drunk text begging her to come back would be nothing compared to what he might do.

As Kaz tried to focus on his work, his thoughts kept drifting back to y/n. He wondered if she thought about him at all during her time with other clients. He hated how possessive he felt, knowing that he was just one of many in her life. He couldn't stand the idea of her being with Pekka Rollins. The thought of her in his arms made his blood boil.

Kaz replayed their conversations in his mind, trying to understand his feelings. He knew he was doing this for Inej, to be able to touch her and be with her without fear. But every time he thought about y/n, it felt more complicated. He didn't want to admit it, but there was a part of him that enjoyed their time together, that looked forward to it. The intimacy they shared, even if it was paid for, was something he had never experienced before.

The next night, Kaz found himself distracted at the Crow Club again. He couldn't help but check his phone, even though he had promised himself he wouldn't. When he saw no new notifications from y/n, he felt a mix of relief and disappointment. He knew he shouldn't care so much, but he did. He needed to keep his emotions in check, for Inej's sake and for his own sanity.

He took a deep breath and tried to focus on the tasks at hand. There were deals to be made, plans to be executed. But even as he immersed himself in work, a part of him remained tethered to the thought of y/n, wondering what she was doing and if she thought about him at all.

***

Kaz and y/n were on her bed, as usual. She was wearing only a bra and panties, and he was trying to let his bare hands wander around her body. He managed to touch her arms comfortably enough, but any other place still made him flinch. They were talking about the latest episode of a show he had made her watch. Well, he had annoyed her so much that she finally gave in and started it. He had tried the same with Inej, but his girlfriend had dropped it after the pilot.

“Kaz, you’re tickling me,” she laughed, trying to squirm away.

“Oh, am I?” he teased, pushing his boundaries only for the sake of making her contort and laugh.

“Please, Kaz, I can’t breathe,” she kept trying to escape him, but apparently, his demons could stay at bay if it meant annoying her. Kaz kept tickling everywhere he could reach, pulling her back against him when she managed to get too far away.

“Safe word, safe word,” she screamed playfully, and he finally stopped. They were both shifting like fools, with Kaz almost pinning her in a corner between the wall and the bed. He was on his knees, his bad leg screaming at him, while she was on her back, half-seated, half-lying down. One of his hands was still on her hip. He squeezed it softly, as if trying to test his boundaries even more.

They were both catching their breaths, and Kaz did everything he could to keep his eyes on hers, without letting them wander over her exposed body.

“You can look if you want,” she said, as if reading his thoughts, batting her lashes and shifting position to lie down better.

“I don’t want to—”

“To what? Make me uncomfortable? I’m a whore, Kaz.”

He didn’t want to do it, but in the end, he was just a man. Kaz let his gaze study her curves, which until that day he had tried so desperately to ignore. He felt a strange mix of guilt and curiosity. His eyes traced the lines of her body, lingering on the soft rise and fall of her chest, the gentle curve of her waist. He couldn’t deny the attraction, the pull he felt towards her, and it unnerved him.

His thoughts raced. What was he doing here? Was this really just about getting comfortable with physical contact for Inej’s sake, or was there something more? He had always prided himself on his control, his ability to stay detached and focused. But here, with y/n, he felt that control slipping away. Was it the intimacy they shared, or was it simply the fact that she saw him, really saw him, in a way that no one else did?

As he continued to study her, he felt a pang of guilt. Inej was the one he loved, the one he was doing all of this for. But he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was betraying her somehow, even though there was nothing truly romantic between him and y/n. It was confusing, and Kaz hated feeling confused. He was used to having a plan, a clear path, and this situation was anything but clear.

Her allusive smile drew him back to the present. She seemed to sense his internal struggle, and instead of pushing him, she just lay there, allowing him to take his time. He appreciated that about her, the way she seemed to understand without needing an explanation.

His hand was still firmly on her waist, and y/n raised a foot, getting it close to his face. He chuckled, trying to grip her ankle, but she kept pulling away. After a few tries, his leg decided to give up, and a sharp pain made him hiss and lose his balance, falling on her.

Kaz could feel her breasts pressed against his chest. He became painfully aware of how much skin was touching him, and he silently thanked Ghezen that he was still clothed. y/n saw him pale. “Kaz, it’s okay. It’s just us.”

The word “us” made him feel worse than her skin. For a second, his gaze fell on her lips. What did “us” even mean in this context? They weren’t a couple, and yet there was an undeniable bond between them. Did that make him unfaithful? Or was this just part of the process, a necessary step on his journey to being with Inej in the way he wanted?

“Great kiss moment,” she assured him, uncertain if he was about to throw up or skip that step and die directly on her.

Surprising both of them, he leaned in, leaving a small kiss on her lips before raising himself up from her body. He sat back, his breathing uneven, and rubbed his aching leg absentmindedly.

She watched him carefully, her expression a mix of concern and curiosity. “Kaz, you’re making a lot of progress. You should be proud of yourself.”

He nodded, but the turmoil inside him was far from settled. The lines between his goals, his feelings for Inej, and his unexpected attachment to y/n were blurring, and he didn’t know how to navigate them. “Thanks,” he muttered, looking away.

Kaz hesitated for a moment, gathering his thoughts before speaking. "I wanted to ask you to try something, but I get it if you say no, it’s weird," he began.

"Tell me," she shrugged curiously, her gaze fixed on him.

Kaz exhaled deeply, bracing himself for the impending embarrassment. "With Inej, we never share a bed. I usually sleep on the couch when she’s at my place, and I wanted to—"

"Sleep with me?" she cut him off, her eyebrows raising slightly.

He nodded silently, watching her reaction closely.

y/n considered it for a moment, her expression thoughtful. "It’s a bit weird," she agreed after a pause, "but I’ve done weirder shit for sure."

"Are you sure you’d be okay with it?" Kaz asked cautiously.

"Yeah, say when," she replied casually, with a hint of a smile.

[hyperiondickrider]

Baby Bunny~

(Chapter 3)

Vox x Reader; Valentino x Reader; Alastor x Reader; maybe Lucifer x Reader

After your untimely death, Mr Vox was kind enough to take you in and give you a job as his assistant. However, it appears that you’ve caught the eyes of few other demons, who are certainly not afraid of a little competition…

It was late when Vox got home. Work had him swamped, with interviews to film, and scripts to review, and he had texted you not to wait up.

So imagine his surprise when he walks into your shared studio, to find you curled up on the couch, whimpering out of discomfort.

Your ears perked up at the sound of the door handle turning, the door creaking open to let in the artificial light of the corridor.

“M-Mr Vox..?”

He simply couldn’t resist cooing at the sight of you, your teary eyes hopeful now that he had finally arrived, a small puddle soaking the velvet of the couch underneath where you lay, a testament to your touching of yourself.

“Oh, dollface, I told you not to wait up, bunny. Y’know how late it is?” He teased you lightly.

You could only respond with a whine, making grabby hands at his tall figure, beckoning him towards you, to give you the attention you so desperately craved.

“Poor baby, are your fingers too small to satisfy you properly? You must’ve been suffering all day; I’ve been meaning to tell Val not to get you so worked up if he’s not gonna help you out after. C’mere, babydoll.”

He scooped you up from your place on the couch, carrying you bridal style to his bedroom, the rumbling vibration of his chest as he hummed providing a sense of comfort as you clung onto him desperately.

With a gentle push of his hips he shut the door behind you two, laying you gently on the bed, caressing your face and petting your hair, until he could control himself no longer, muffling your small whimpers and whines as he licked your lips, enjoying their softness before his tongue forced its way into your mouth.

He drove his leg between your thighs, holding your wrists above your head with one hand, the other massaging your ears in your favourite way, rubbing them between his fingers and thumb. He swallows up your mewls and whines, grinning against your lips when you bucked your hips against his thigh, aching for stimulation.

He drew back just to get a better look at you, stopping his ministrations entirely, causing you to whimper and tear up.

Satan, you looked pathetic already.

After what seemed like an eternity, he pulled your back against his chest, leaning against his headboard. Pressing hot kisses down your neck, one of his hands slithered down your body, finding refuge between your legs. He smirked, feeling how sopping wet your flimsy panties were, a cute pink pair with bows as well. He pulled the pair to the side, circling a clawed finger around your entrance, gathering up your wetness before moving it up to apply gentle pressure to your puffy clit, flicking it softly.

“M-Mr Vox, hah~, p-please, I-i need you..” Already you were struggling to form coherent sentences.

“You okay there, babydoll? You’re bein awfully needy today, princess.” He plunged two finger into your core, catching you off guard. With his fingers deep inside you in a bowling ball grip, he finally began curling his finger, squeezing that spongy spot deep in your walls, that you yourself could never quite reach. You let out a deep moan at this, throwing your head back in pleasure, your legs shaking as his pace increased.

His own strong legs kept your thighs open, as your reflexes tried to shut them from the stimulation.

“You gonna cum, babydoll? C’mon, s’ok, you can cum for me.”

“T-Thank you, sir, hah~..”

He increased his pace once again, curling his finger harshly, scraping your gummy walls with delicious pressure. His thumb came down to rub tight circles into your clit, finally pushing you over the edge.

“C-cumming, s-sir!”

With a final yelp and whimper, you finally come, walls pulsating and clenching around his thick fingers, as he pinched your clit, prolonging your release. Presses soft kisses to your dazed face, he gently praises you for your compliance, whispering sweet nothings into your ears.

“Such a good girl for me, hm? Always listening to me, asking for permission to cum. Good job, dollface.” Your face flushed at the praise, growing wetter once again, combined with Vox’s rock hard boner pressing against your ass.

Vox flips you onto your stomach, your ass up with your back arched, as he quickly undid his slacks, leaving his dress shirt on, forearms exposed.

He spat on his hand, pumping his cock a few times before rubbing the swollen, red tip. Finally satisfied, he aligned it with your hole, dragging his tip up and down your cunt, collected your wetness and poking your clit. Your desperate whines were enough to convince him to continue, finally pushing in, hitting himself in your warm, wet pussy.

He set a harsh pace, his tip kissing your cervix with every thrust, stretching out your walls with a delicious pain, heavy balls slapping against your clit causing such pleasure it was almost painful.

“F-fuck, babydoll, ease up a little, you’re gonna milk me dry.” Vox tried to maintain his composure, his screen starting to glitch out at the intense stimulation, the lights in the room beginning to flicker.

“S-sir, feels so g-good, ah~, I-I’m close!” Your small hands gripped the sheets, as one of his hands reached forward to grab you by the ears, their sensitivity heightened by your arousal.

He tugged on your ears, forcing your back to arch even further, as he angled his hips to hit your sweet spot, abusing it until you were seeing stars. Your vision began to fade as you started seeing black spots, the coil inside your stomach ever tightening.

“Hah~ I-I’m gonna c-cum, Mr Vox!” With a final thrust into your sweet spot, you came around his cock, clenching down so hard his release followed shortly after, burying himself inside you as his screen buffered intensely.

“F-fuck, bunny.” He collapsed onto you, pulling out as a stream of cum flowed out of you, your shaky legs covered in a combination of his and your cream.

Pulling you close, he opted to pick you up and carry you to his bathtub, doubtful you could stand for a shower. He ran the tub, adding salts and bubbles since he knew you loved a bubble bath, and occasionally snapped his fingers in front of your face to make sure you remained conscious.

Finally, he scooped you up and placed the two of you in the bath together, leaning you up against his chest as he gently washed the two of you, seemingly enjoying the intimacy of it.

“You feelin better, bunny? M’sorry I wasn’t here to help you earlier. I’ll shoot a text to Val so he’ll stop bein so mean to ya.”

“Yeah, thank you, Mr Vox. I’m feelin better now. I’ll be sure to work extra hard tomorrow so you can see how grateful I am.” You smiled warmly up at him, your gaze meeting his own, as you embraced him in the warmth of the bathtub.

You really were too gentle, it’s a wonder why you’re in hell to begin with.

Tags: @enby-rising @whocaresimnothere @christineblood @sirenetheblogger @vash-yuu

[lightweaver-chosen-if]

MOODY.INK | DASHINGDON | FORUM NEWEST UPDATE (01/04/24)

You still remember it.

Burnt into the back of your eyelids like a scar.

The orphanage.

The cold, lifeless, barren gray walls. The creaky wooden floorboards that groaned and moaned in each step.

A place you used to call home.

But you escaped.

Perhaps in your new life at Launwyce Academy you could start anew, find a way to heal the invisible scars on your soul.

For now, all you can do is walk forward.

One step at a time.

Lightweaver: Chosen is an upcoming modern fantasy IF for 18+ players and older. Use of elemental powers is inspired by Avatar: The Legend of Aang/Korra.

A world where elemental deities share a fraction of their powers to their chosen, bringing upon the age of weavers; humans with the ability to manipulate the elements of their patron.

You have been chosen by a mysterious lightning deity—blessing you with the power to weave lightning. But with a troubled childhood haunting your every step, your new abilities present a double-edged sword.

The choices you make, the support you receive, and the inner strength you harness define your journey—a journey fraught with anguish, but one that promises a life outside Mother’s grasp.

Two divergent paths lay ahead.

Will you let yourself heal and grow, or will you fall deeper into the void?

Play as a touch-averse customizable MC with a troubled past, male or female.

Learn how to use your newfound lightning powers to its fullest potential. Anything’s possible if you’re smart enough!

Use your powers for good and be admired. Or use them to become a menace in society and be feared.

Participate in Launwyce’s many academy events and competitive tournaments. Show the weaving world what you’re made of.

A potential pet has also chosen you as its human; teach it a trick or two!

Shape your MC’s personality however you want. Certain choices also help shape the rest of your past.

How the MC deals with their trauma is entirely up to you.

Push away or make new relationships. Everyone has their own inner demons you can unveil.

Character-driven narrative and slow burn character development.

Eventually face the monster from your past, Mother.

3 different endings to branch into!

Luna/Leo Bancroft | 18 | Fire Weaver | Freshman | A’s childhood friend If MC is shorter than L, they’re shorter than all ROs

They were the first to notice you falling.

A warm and gentle soul. But there’s a certain air about them, the kind that makes them seem untouchable. It’s a type of muted cheer, one that carries the tension of maintaining a persona, but perhaps not a façade.

Despite their unusual aura, they’re attentive and smart, not to mention remarkably insightful.

Alice/Alec Langley | 18 | Water Weaver | Freshman | L’s childhood friend If MC is taller than A, they unlock height choices for J

They were the one who made sure you landed safely; and with flourish.

Behind their snark lies a certain vulnerability, hidden by a layer of frost and caution. You suspect that they wear the act like a mask; even if the flecks of passion flickering beneath the surface reveal a fiery heart.

They’re quick-witted and equally sharp-tongued. They never hesitate to speak their mind.

June/Juno Patel | 19 | Earth Weaver | Sophomore If MC is taller than J, they’re taller than all ROs

Ever present on their features is a stern expression; jaw set and eyes sharp. Even with little words uttered, they carry themself with confidence that demands respect.

Their intimidating presence often gives people pause, but those who dare meet them head-on will find a stubborn and proud spirit that refuses to yield.

Surprisingly, they’re easy to read, and it makes interacting with them oddly satisfying.

[upswnel]

— gojo satoru x reader, academic rivals, mutual pining-ish, collage au! sukuna is a soccer player :D

the late afternoon sun cast a warm, golden glow over the university campus, stretching shadows across the grassy lawn where you and gojo sat. the peaceful surroundings were in stark contrast to the tension crackling between you. books and notes were scattered around, but the real focus was on the unspoken competition between you two.

gojo, reclining with his white hair catching the sunlight, pushed his sunglasses down slightly to get a better look at you. "you know, for someone who talks a big game, you're taking an awfully long time with that problem," gojo teased, a smirk playing on his lips.

you shot him a glare, though there was a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. "and for someone who claims to be a genius, you sure spend a lot of time worrying about what I'm doing, satoru."

he chuckled, shifting slightly to face you. "it's not worry; it's amusement. watching you struggle is surprisingly entertaining."

"maybe if you spent more time on your own work instead of trying to distract me, you'd actually beat me in something for once."

"oh, please," he said, waving a hand dismissively. "i let you win sometimes. it’s more fun to watch you gloat."

“sure, whatever helps you sleep at night,” you said, your tone sharp, the competitive edge between you as evident as ever.

for a moment, the two of you lapsed into silence, both pretending to focus on your work but the tension was thick, and you decided it was time to stir the pot a little.

“by the way, sukuna asked me out.”

gojo’s smirk faltered, and he sat up straighter, “sukuna? the soccer guy? you said yes?”

“why not?” you replied, keeping your tone casual, almost dismissive. “he’s got that athlete charm, you know...”

gojo’s expression darkened, a mix of surprise and irritation flashing in his eyes. “and you’re really going to go out with him?”

you tilted your head slightly, intrigued by his reaction. “why do you act like you have a problem with it?” it's safe to say you were... satisfied with his reaction.

he hesitated, his usual confidence giving way to frustration. “i just didn’t think you’d be into someone like him.”

“someone like him?” you said, raising an eyebrow.

“yeah,” gojo continued, his voice growing more tense. “sukuna’s… well, he’s all about sports, right? i mean it's not like it's a bad thing but he’s not exactly known for his intellectual abilities. i just didn’t think that’s the kind of person you’d go for.”

you couldn’t help but smirk, sensing the frustration behind his words. “so, what? everyone likes athlethic guys. you’re saying i should only go out with... nerds?”

he ran a hand through his hair, clearly annoyed. “no, that’s not what i meant. it’s just… you’re always pushing yourself, always aiming high. i figured you’d be more into someone who could keep up with you in that way.”

you looked thoughtful for a moment, as if considering his words. “well, i think he could, it's just the difference of the fields. but then again, who knows? sometimes, plans change.”

gojo frowned, trying to make sense of what you were hinting at. “plans change? what, like you might suddenly decide you’re not interested in going out with him?”

you shrugged, glancing at him with a knowing look. “maybe. if something more interesting comes up.”

“something more interesting?” he repeated, trying to connect the dots. “like… what?”

you toyed with a blade of grass, keeping your tone light. “oh, i don’t know. depends on the offer.”

he narrowed his eyes, clearly deep in thought. then, suddenly, a look of realization crossed his face. “wait… are you thinking what I think you’re thinking?”

you looked up at him with feigned innocence. “well... what are you thinking?”

your eyes met, a challenge in his gaze. “i’m not saying it first.”

“neither am I,” you shot back, crossing your arms as if to double down.

for a moment, you both sat there, staring each other down, each waiting for the other to crack.

“what? afraid to say it?” you taunted, raising an eyebrow.

he scoffed, leaning back as if to make a point. “me? afraid? please. i just don’t want to give you the satisfaction.”

“oh, so you’d rather sit here and sulk because you can’t admit it?” you shot back, your voice rising.

“sulk?” he repeated, his tone incredulous. “you’re the one playing mind games here!”

“maybe I am,” you said, leaning in, “but it looks like i'm winning.”

gojo's eye almost twitched, his jaw tightening, “winning? you think this is some kind of game?”

“isn’t it always?” you countered, your eyes gleaming with challenge.

“fine,” he snapped, leaning in close, his eyes locked on yours. “you want me to say it? are you that desperate for it?”

“you’re the one who’s desperate and put off by the mention of sukuna's name,” you retorted, refusing to back down. “you just can’t admit it.”

“admit what? that you’d rather spend time with me than go out with him?” his voice was sharp, but there was a hint of vulnerability beneath it.

you paused, the sudden shift in his tone catching you off guard. but you quickly recovered, crossing your arms defiantly. “if that’s what you think, then say it.”

he stared at you, frustration boiling over, before finally letting out an exasperated sigh. “okay, fine. would you like to play chess... with me rather than going out with him? there, I said it.”

you couldn’t resist a satisfied smile as you stood up, gathering your things. “well, if you’re that desperate for my company…”

gojo playfully rolled his eyes, though the frustration in his voice was now mixed with something more reluctant. “yeah, yeah, just don’t think I’m letting you win.”

as you walked away together, the tension between you had shifted slightly. the rivalry was still there, as sharp and competitive as ever, but underneath it was a mutual recognition that you both enjoyed this back-and-forth more than either of you would admit. and as he watched you out of the corner of his eye, he couldn’t help but feel a strange mix of frustration and satisfaction, knowing that you’d gotten under his skin in a way that no one else could.

[its-avalon-08]

lando norris x reader part2

part 2 guys <3 themes- enemies to lovers flirty interactions female Formula1 driver

Chapter 2 - Queen of the Pits

The first practice session crackled with anticipation. Cameras followed Y/N's every move, eager to capture the prodigal daughter's return. As she strapped herself into the RB19, a familiar thrill flooded her system. This was what she lived for, the roar of the engine, the wind whipping through her hair, the world blurring into a kaleidoscope of speed and adrenaline.

The tires met the tarmac, and Y/N was gone. Her driving was textbook perfect, yet imbued with an audacious flair that left seasoned veterans speechless. She pushed the car to its limits, shaving seconds off Lando's time with each lap. In the garage, Max watched, a satisfied glint in his eye. He knew Y/N's raw talent, but witnessing it unleashed against Lando filled him with a strange mix of amusement and…pride?

Lando, meanwhile, sputtered with frustration. His meticulously planned practice was thrown into disarray by Y/N's effortless dominance. His frustration manifested in aggressive maneuvers, borderline reckless, that had even the ever-optimistic Daniel Ricciardo frowning.

After the session, the paddock buzzed. Y/N was the star of the show, swarmed by reporters and rival drivers alike. They loved her – her quick wit, her dry humor, and the genuine kindness that shone through her steely exterior. She signed autographs with a wink, cracked jokes with Sebastian Vettel, and offered encouraging words to the rookies, all while radiating an unshakeable confidence that had even Lewis Hamilton raising an eyebrow.

Back in the Red Bull garage, Max cornered Y/N. "Not bad, rookie," he said, a smirk playing on his lips. "Looks like I might have to up my game."

Y/N grinned, unfazed. "Oh, Max, darling," she drawled, "you already have your hands full. But hey, if you need some pointers, I'm always happy to help."

Their playful banter was interrupted by Lando, storming in, face thunderous. "You think you're funny, L/N?" he spat.

Y/N raised an eyebrow, unperturbed. "Just stating facts, Norris."

Lando opened his mouth to retort, but Max cut him off. "Enough," he said, his voice surprisingly firm. "We're teammates, remember? Lando, work on your line. Y/N, don't get too cocky. We still have a long season ahead."

Y/N nodded, respecting the authority in Max's voice. He wasn't just her teammate; he was, in a strange way, becoming a mentor, a voice of reason amidst the whirlwind of her return.

Later that evening, amidst the neon lights of Monaco, Y/N found herself sharing a drink with Charles Leclerc. They talked about racing, the pressure, the thrill of the chase. In Charles, she found a kindred spirit, someone who understood the language of pushing the limits, of dancing on the edge of control.

As the night deepened, Y/N realized something: amidst the rivalry, the competition, she'd found an unexpected camaraderie. The paddock wasn't just a battleground; it was a community, a tapestry woven with threads of rivalry, respect, and even, she dared to hope, friendship.

The roar of the engines might be deafening, the competition fierce, but Y/N knew, with a certainty that hummed in her blood, that she belonged here. This was her world, and she was ready to race.

[wildandsmile]

𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞 ☆ 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐲𝐚 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫.

🗯️ fem! reader, smut, switch! chishiya, consumption of alcohol and marijuana, light choking, praise, degradation, teasing, porn with plot, a lot of plot, spanking, daddy kink, gradually gets rougher, possessive chishiya, slightly inebriated sex. enjoy.

spoiled. self-centered. intelligent. this woman thinks the sun should rise and set according to her needs. daddy’s girl dumped in the borderlands, left to fend for herself. in this world, it’s kill or be killed, and she was born with a dagger in her manicured hands. serpentine. a striking kind of beautiful, the kind you could drown in, the kind you’d come running for. lethal. that’s how he’d describe her. like a black widow, gorgeous until the bitter end.

(y/n) walked to the log podium and grabbed a phone from it. all eyes on her, as always. the game was that of a puzzle, a thought provoking riddle. she wouldn’t stand a chance. or so he thought. adorned in bracelets, a black mini top and jean shorts, she looked like your average doe-faced lamb, destined to be in the hands of slaughter. she took a few steps back and assessed her competition. a guy who seemed to be in his mid twenties and on the verge of shitting himself, two teenage girls, a teenage boy, herself, a middle aged woman, and.. him.

blonde, unavailable. she caught his eye, he caught hers. he waved. she looked him up and down, taking in all that he had to offer. average height, not like the others. he didn’t drool at the sight of her. didn’t seem to be the slightest bit impressed. she sent a small, polite grin his way. and that was that. the game commenced. she took off her shoes and flexed her toes before she began running. the goal of the game was to collect five metal stars before time ran out. there were fifteen stars hidden in the building, which meant three people would survive. you could take other peoples stars, but you’d have to kill them to do it.

a game of average difficulty, meant to turn man onto man. of course. a guy in his mid twenties, two teenage girls, a teenage boy, a middle aged woman, and him. of the seven original players, three came out victorious. herself, he, and one of the two teenage girls. he caught her eye. she waved. he looked her up and down, gave her a smirk. and that was that.

that was about a month ago. now, (y/n) sat pretty at the beach, an official member. The requirement to be in swimwear at all times didn’t bother her in the slightest. it made her job a whole lot easier. entice, bury, climb. she lied sprawled on a tanning chair by the pool, a mixed drink in one hand, the hand of a poor sap in the other. “beautiful boy,” she’d tell him. “so pretty for me”, she’d say. and that was all it took. some tits and a smile went a long way in this world. any guy, or girl, would easily jump the opportunity to relax in her arms after being on edge one hundred percent of every day. it was hard being lab rats in a maze.

“(y/n).” a stern voice came from above her, as did a shadow, blocking the sun from her body. she raised her sunglasses onto her head and frowned at whoever dared to interrupt her tanning time. “what?” she asked, all attitude and lip gloss. “hatter has requested to see you.” he said. she put a hand over her eyes. it was that.. tall, lanky fellow. keiichi, was his name. or at least she thought it was. “ugh. now?” she whined, pouting her pretty lips. “yes, now.” he mocked her. she frowned. he smirked, satisfied with himself. she leaned over and kissed her newest boy toy on the forehead before swinging her legs over and standing up, letting keiichi lead her to hatter.

“ah, (y/n)! my favorite subject. come in, come in.” hatter announced upon her arrival. she rolled her eyes and keiichi shut the door behind them. hatter had two women on each side of him, kissing him and giggling and shooting her looks that said ‘i have what you can’t’. she didn’t want hatter anyways. yes, he was attractive, but she’d be stupid to get sexually tangled up with him, and stupid was one thing she wasn’t. “what do you want?” she asked, crossing her arms and putting her weight into her left leg, putting her hip to the side. hatter proceeded, “i want you to be one of my executives.”

she blinked once, twice. smiled. “excuse me?” disbelief. “you heard me. i want you to be an executive.” she chuckled despite herself. “why?” hatter rolled his eyes. “if you’re smart, you’ll take the position.” and smart she was. she let hatter give her a new wristband. she was number four. “you will report here every day at ten in the morning and ten at night. am i understood?” she smiled sickeningly sweet. “yes, hatter.” she left the room swaying her hips a little more than usual.

that was three weeks ago. she’d seen the blonde boy, chishiya, multiple times since then. a wave and a grin every time. never anything more. she’d also met a girl named kuina at a game. upon learning she was a beach member, they became friends, and that meant (y/n) saw chishiya much more. still, they never spoke. whenever he was around, she would leave, claiming she had to do something for hatter. she didn’t dislike chishiya, oh no. she disliked how he made her feel. his eyes seemed to possess the ability to see directly through her and she hated it. hated feeling vulnerable, like her being had been opened and dissected for everyone to see. hated that she didn’t know what he was thinking every time he looked at her.

so, here she was. a blonde girl on her left and a brunette boy on her right. she recognized them as some of hatter’s old groupies. the girl held her drink and the boy held her hand, massaging it and babbling nonstop about how pretty she was. she was in the executive commons area, ten o’clock, as she was supposed to be. they had meetings twice a day for various reasons. sometimes they were serious, sometimes they just ripped into each other and joked around. either way, she was always there on time, pretty in pink. she saw the way chishiya had looked at her and her two accessories when he walked in. he smirked like it was funny. whatever.

the meeting went on for thirty minutes, and (y/n) received countless kisses and compliments from her little toys. she’d smile and kiss them back, telling them ‘cut it out, you’ll make me blush’. thirty minutes, she had to deal with being showered in touches and words she didn’t want. but nobody would be any of the wiser, she seemed like she loved it. but he knew.

the moment the meeting was over, (y/n) kissed her toys goodbye and left like her heeled sandals were on fire. she made her way hurriedly out to the pool and to the bar, where she ordered a mixed drink and a lolipop. some flirting with the bartender and a flash of her wristband got her the items for free. she took her drink and her lolipop to the tanning chairs and sat down, gazing upon the people in the pool. the music was obnoxiously loud, the way she liked it to be. it drowned out her thoughts and the idea that other people could be perceiving her the way she perceived them. it didn’t take long for kuina to find her.

“hey!” she said. “hey, sugar.” (y/n) handed her drink to kuina and let her sip from it, the way she always would. kuina laid in the chair next to hers, starting to people-watch. kind of. “did you have to participate in any games today?” “no. did you?” “yeah. me and chishiya.” (y/n) huffed out a little laugh. she’d played three games with chishiya total. he was arguably the luckiest and the smartest person in the borderlands. (y/n) was just smart and fast, a good combination to be.

kuina and (y/n) got about ten minutes together before two of her little toys came running over, whining her name and throwing themselves into her arms. “hello, my lovelies,” she’d say. “you look so pretty for me,” she’d say. they’d coo and kiss her face and hand her drinks and pipes. kuina, by default would get attention too. attention she didn’t necessarily want but was too shy to reject. so they sat together, surrounded by desperate beach members and compliments and alcohol and drugs.

“mama (y/n), can i please..?” a skinny brunette boy asked, giving her doe eyes and holding a small bag. it was cocaine. she knew what he was asking. she nodded and lied back, smirking at him. she watched as the boy placed two lines on her thigh and snorted them up, making her giggle at the tickling sensation. she giggled more at the way the people around them cheered, so amused by the fact an executive would let a lowly member snort drugs off of her body. but of course, the wicked know no peace.

“(y/n).” a rough voice sounded. the brunette sat up and his dazed smile disappeared. he instantly paled and huddled closer to (y/n) like a scared child. she looked up to be met with Niragi’s disgusted yet intrigued face above her, looking at her and her little toy with scrutiny. “yes, niragi?” she said, making her tone high and sickeningly sweet, the way she knew he hated. “don’t play coy with me, whore. you know why i���m here.” she raised an eyebrow, a smile building on her lips. “oh, do i? i guess i might..” she said, pressing her painted fingernail to her lips and biting onto it with a smile. niragi was mad that she had taken his position as fourth. he picked on her for it daily, hoping to eventually scare her into submission. wouldn’t he ever get tired?

“give it up, niragi.”, she cooed, her voice smooth and sweet like a symphony. “it’s not my fault hatter didn’t want you as his rabid lap dog anymore.” at some point, an onlooking crowd had formed, and they collectively made an ‘oh shit’ noise at her words. she saw niragi sneer, felt her boy toy tense up. keeping eye contact with niragi, she leaned over and cradled the boys head against her shoulder, shushing him quietly. “it’s okay, baby, don’t let his rifle scare you. he’s no threat. i won’t let him touch a hair on your pretty little head, okay?”

in the next moment, (y/n) had been grabbed up roughly by her bikini straps and hoisted into the air, being held nose-to-nose with niragi. she could smell him, a mixture of gunpowder, cigarettes and vodka. she smiled in his face. “oh, honey. did i hurt your feelings?” she knew he wouldn’t hurt her. couldn’t hurt her. hatter would have his head on a platter in two seconds flat if she had so much as a bruise. every word she spoke was like a jab to a bear. he grew angrier with each passing second, borderline growling in her face now. “i suggest,” she looked over his shoulder and saw hatter and aguni approaching. she leaned in with a seductive, serpentine glint in her eyes, so close she could kiss him. she licked her lips. “you put me down.”

“niragi.” she was dropped to her feet in an instant, and she couldn’t help the coy grin that played on her lips. the crowd that had formed had grown extremely tense. the tension was thick enough to grab out of the air. the music had stopped, and the main source of entertainment was them. it was silent other than the sound of hatter’s footsteps. he stopped in front of niragi and gazed at him, his face cold and hard. “do we have a problem?” he asked. niragi looked angry enough to spit. but, being smart for once, he swallowed his pride and bit his tongue. “no.” he bit out, flickering an angry, pointed look to (y/n), who was being fussed over by her toys. “are you okay?”, they were asking. “that looked so scary, i was so worried.”, they were saying. “i suggest you go on and mind it.” hatter said. (y/n) paused to watch. both men looked ready to pounce. two, four, five seconds passed before niragi clicked his tongue, turned on his heel, and stormed off. (y/n) chuckled. hatter gave her a look and nodded in her direction, only turning to leave when she returned the gesture.

the crowd dissipated, going off into small groups to discuss what had happened. “oh, (y/n). he’s gonna kill you one day.” kuina said, visibly anxious. “oh, he can try.” (y/n) said, biting the nail of her thumb. she seemed to be thinking for a moment, her eyes glazing over and her teeth toying with her fingernail. “(y/n)! you had me worried sick.” her female toy pouted at her, pressing her boobs against her arm. she turned and smiled, lifting her chin and gazing down at her lips. “i’m sorry, pretty. do you want me to kiss you better?” the girl nodded of course, so (y/n) closed her eyes and pressed her lips against hers firmly, only pulling away when the girl was dizzy and out of breath. the girl giggled like a gleeful child and (y/n) smiled, but she genuinely couldn’t take any more of this.

“i’m going to go to my room now, lovelies.” she said. there were varied reactions, most of them being whining and complaining and pleading with her to stay. she kissed each one of her toys goodbye before turning to leave. “wait!”, one of them called out. she turned around to see the same brunette guy from before holding a small gift bag out to her. “here. for.. uh, yeah.” he smiled shyly, and she felt bad for him. just a little. he reminded her of a little kid with that hopeful, shy gleam behind his hazy eyes. he wouldn’t last very long here. she smiled to him, perhaps the last kind gesture he’d ever receive. “thank you, pretty boy.” she accepted the bag, kissed his forehead and quickly walked away before anybody else could stop her for any reason. she didn’t bother to see what was inside of it.

thankfully, the commons area was surprisingly empty. most people were out by the pool, in the casino room, or their own bedrooms. she thanked whatever god above for that. the sound of her sandals hitting the linoleum floors reverberated against the walls. she made it to the middle of the room, between the two grand staircases before a voice sounded behind her. she was so shocked she almost dropped the gift bag.

“i saw what happened just now.”

she turned around to see chishiya leaning casually against a pillar, that permanent sly smirk on his face. “yeah? what about it?” she asked, a little irritated. she didn’t like to be caught off guard and he had just about scared the piss out of her. “you’re lucky hatter showed up when he did.” she rolled her eyes. “niragi wouldn’t have touched me even if hatter didn’t come.” she grumbled under her breath. she faced him fully now, her arms crossed over her chest. it was silent for the next few moments. chishiya did that thing she hated, saw into her. assessed each detail of her, from the top of her head and her slightly mussed hair down to her pink and white painted toenails.

“why do you let them touch you?” she blinked. “excuse me?” chishiya stepped forward, his hands placed in his pockets. “why do you let them touch you?” he asked again. she stared at him and met that feline gaze, narrowing her eyes. she grinned slowly. “do you smoke?” she asked. he shook his head no. “do you drink?” he shrugged. she looked him up and down, the way she had when they first met. she smirked and turned around, starting towards the stairs. she began the ascent and looked over her shoulder with a sultry glint in her eye. if he was smart, he’d follow.

and that he did. she opened the door to her assigned hotel room and welcomed him in, propping a door underneath the handle the moment they were both inside. she couldn’t have a lock on her door, but she could still block it. she didn’t want anyone coming inside while she was sleeping. then again, they’d have to have a death wish to pull something like that with her. her room was a basic, cozy lovers suite. only the best for an executive. she had decorated it with pink liquor bottles and diamond jewelry, mostly gifts from her toys. she plopped down on her neatly made bed and sighed, smirking in amusement at the way chishiya stood awkwardly in the furthest corner from her.

“i don’t bite. come sit down.” she motioned to the extra chair next to her bed. he slowly walked over and sat down, surprised to discover that the chair spun. he seemed to enjoy that. he silently swayed himself side to side while (y/n) tore into the gift bag she had been gifted, delighted to find a pink mini pipe and a little bag full of grade-a marijuana. “awe, fuck yeah man.” she said, happy as could be. she typically hated her toys, but she loved the gifts they gave. she began packing the bowl as neatly as she could, making sure it was a good one. she lit the bowl and took her first hit, a small one. she didn’t want to get white girl ratchet with chishiya in her room.

“want some?” she offered. he shook his head no. she shrugged. “you never answered my question.” he persisted, his voice calm and even, a satisfied feline expression on his face. he didn’t seem intimidated by her, her beauty, or the fact she could have him dead in four seconds flat. “why would i share such a secret with you?” she asked, lying her bowl down on the bedside table. she got up from the bed as he shrugged and she shimmied over him to get to the mini fridge. she pulled out a whiskey glass and poured some type of liquor into it before bringing it back to chishiya.

“i bet you like rich, sweet corn whiskey more than anything else.” she said. his eyebrow rose and he smirked as he accepted the glass. “lucky bet.” he said. she smiled. she sat down on the bed and crossed her legs, making sure she was positioned directly across from him. she tilted her head curiously, watching him drink as he watched her watch him. he broke the silence. “i bet you let them touch you to gain their trust.” she quirked a curious brow in his direction, lighting up her bowl again. “what makes you say that?” she hummed as she took another small drag, savoring it. he leaned back in the chair and manspread a bit, making himself comfortable.

“you run away from them the moment you can. i see your face when you think you’re alone. you’re disgusted with it, with yourself, maybe. am i right?” she stayed silent. he continued. “i saw the look on your face when you left hatter’s office the day he recruited you. you looked like you had just been told you won a million dollars. which essentially, you had. a million dollars worth of government secrets, and that’s what you wanted.”

chishiya smirked as she tried to hide the fact he was right by keeping a poker face that very slightly faltered every time he stated a new fact. “you want to climb the executive ladder socially and politically so when our leader eventually becomes corrupt and falls, you’ll be the one to take his place. because that’s what you want. power.” he smiled lazily as he brought the rim of his glass to his lips, satisfied with himself. “just a hunch.” he said. she snorted and rolled her eyes. “wow. you were on a roll there for a while, partner.” she said, and she tried not to react to the way he was visibly, slightly taken aback by her response.

“i don’t want power, i want safety. being an executive means nobody touches me while i work the inside reigns and gather information nobody else has access to. being an executive means i can hopefully use what i have to formulate a plan to get the fuck out of here. if i’m good with the people, then nobody accuses me of anything, because nobody wants to see my downfall.” she said, her brows knitting together as she explained, a slight edge in her voice. chishiya smirked and nodded, irritating her further. she so desperately wanted to wipe that smirk off his face.

she leaned forward and braced her hands on her thighs to ground herself. she was close to chishiya, could almost smell him. she glared into his eyes with a sharp gaze, her eyes narrowed. “i bet that you were unhappy with your life in our world. you enjoy the games because you know that you could die and not have to deal with anything anymore, or you could survive and further prove to yourself just how superior and intelligent you are. you don’t care about others lives. this entire world is a big puzzle to you, a puzzle you want to put together and you don’t mind getting people out of the way to solve it.”

she said. chishiya’s eyes widened and he pursed his lips, making a ‘wow, alright then’ expression. “clever girl.” he muttered after a few quiet moments. he sipped deeply from his glass, setting it down once it was empty. she was high, he was buzzed, they were both extremely intelligent, and had high hands in the game of life. not a good mixture. “whatever.” she said, flopping down on her bed. “you’re gonna get high off of second-hand smoke inhalation.” she said. he chuckled. “there’s not enough smoke in the air for that to happen.” she rolled her eyes. “i bet you were a professional smart-ass in our world.” he smirked. “i bet you were a stripper.” she laughed, bitterly albeit. “funny.” “yes, i’m often told that i’m funny.” she rolled her eyes.

“seriously, what were you?” she asked. he kept silent, watching her with a lazy, amused grin. “i bet you were..” she paused to think. “an engineer.” she said. he smiled and exhaled a small laugh type thing. “no. i bet you were a bikini model.” she shook her head, amused. “no. nice to know you think i’m hot enough to be one of those. were you a.. typical office worker?” she asked. “no. babysitter?” “no.”

they went back and forth like that for what must have been a full ten minutes, coming up with things like scientist, escort, pimp, business owner, gymnastics coach, dance choreographer, physics teacher, etc. “okay, i give.” she said, smiling. the atmosphere was relaxed due to both of them being a little ditzy from their substance of choice and it made her happy. she was happy that she wasn’t worrying about being perceived by him and happy that he was loosened up enough to joke around with her the way he was. he’d had two drinks and she’d had three hits by this point. “what were you?” he smirked and looked away, seeming like he was going to withhold the information. when she opened her mouth to say something else, he answered. “a doctor.”

her eyebrows quirked up. “a doctor?” he nodded. “nice.” she said, and as she looked him over, she thought that being a doctor did suit him. “and you?” she leaned back and propped her hands behind her head, gazing up at the ceiling. “i was a competitive aerialist.” he nodded. “that suits you.” “thanks.”

they shared a look for a few moments before (y/n) inhaled deeply and rolled off of the bed, making her way to the window. “wanna dance?” “i don’t dance.” she smirked and opened the window, letting the loud music from downstairs flow in and fill the room. “you do now.” chishiya looked to her. she could see the gears turning in his head. “dance for me.” he said. she paused. “what?” “you said you were a professional aerialist. dance for me.” one, two, four seconds went by of her staring at him before she nodded. she went to her dresser and pulled out long wraps of silk.

“i had a hook installed in here for this exact reason.” she muttered. she swung the silks over the hook and tested their grip before she turned her back to chishiya and took a breath. “look at me.” she said. his gaze flickered to her. “are you looking?” “yes.” she grinned. she began a simple but enticing choreography, caressing the silks and vice versa in the the process. she hoisted herself into the air and turned upside down, letting her legs fall into a spread eagle. she looked to chishiya to see him watching her closely, tapping his fingertips against his empty whiskey glass. she slowly allowed herself to descend, swaying her legs gracefully. she looked like a spider in a web, or maybe an angel. she spun once, twice, slowly around the silk, letting it slide against her body as she gently pressed her feet to the ground. she lowered her arms fluidly and slowly before smiling, taking a playful bow. chishiya nodded with an amused smile on his lips.

“you’re good at what you do.” “thank you.” she left the silks hanging there and she went back to the bed, crawling onto it. she lied down on her side and propped her head up on her outstretched arm. “do you know why you became an executive?” he asked suddenly. she shook her head. “no.” chishiya stood and crossed the front of the bed, circling it. he sat down next to her, making himself comfortable. “i do.” she rolled over to face him. “please, pray tell.” he smirked and looked down at her, his hands folded across his stomach. “you’re good at what you do.” he said again. she tilted her head. “what do you mean?” “you’ve been here for.. close to two months now and yet you’re still alive. you’re smart and it’s saving your ass. hatter likes that about you. he knows your insight will help him.” she huffed, a small grin building on her lips. “yeah?” he looked away. she smiled.

“do you know why you’re an executive?” she asked him. “no. why?” “i don’t know either.” he laughed dryly. she laughed because he did. “it’s probably because you manage to be everywhere and nowhere simultaneously. you’re the eyes and ears of the operation.” he nodded. “you’re probably right.” she smiled. she rolled onto her back and gazed up at him, absorbing the look of his face, his deepset sleepy eyes, the curl of his lips, his straight lashes. she smiled again, amused. “what?” he asked. her smile grew. “nothing.” he shook his head and looked away, out the window.

“you’re pretty.” she said. he looked down at her with an eyebrow raised slightly. “what?” “you’re pretty.” she repeated. he shook his head and chuckled, turning back to face the window. “thanks.” it was quiet for a little bit. “i’m not actually a daddy’s girl, y’know. i’ve just.. found that men prefer easy girls. girls without opinions. girls who tell them what they want to hear.” chishiya glanced over at her. “i know.” he said. for some reason, the words made her feel a lot better. she didn’t want to be perceived as brainless; atleast not by him. she valued his opinion.

“i’ll be leaving now.” he stood and crossed the room in no kind of hurry. she watched him go. “why?” she asked. he paused, looked over his shoulder at her. he smirked. “goodnight, (y/n).” and he was gone.

three days went by and she didn’t see chishiya. not at any of the executive meetings, not around the pool, nowhere. he didn’t visit her room either. she tapped her glass anxiously, looking around the room for the millionth time. “(y/n), calm down. i’m sure he’s fine.” kuina gently grabbed her hand to still her movements. she sighed and looked around again, hoping desperately that she’d spot his familiar fading roots, but it turned out fruitless. the clinging of glass bottles and the sound of music rattled around in her skull so loudly she could barely stand it. “here, drink. you need to relax.” kuina pushed a straw against her lips and she took it into her mouth without looking in her direction. her eyes were glazed over and she was clearly lost in thought.

one, two, three drinks in and (y/n) was starting to feel better. she could go twenty minutes at a time without scanning the room for him. kuina stayed by her side the entire time, reassuring her that he would come. clock struck two in the morning. he hadn’t come. “whatever.” (y/n) said, scowling as she pushed herself off of her stool. “fuck him.” kuina watched her go onto the dance floor and immediately be flanked on all sides by two men and a woman. she stood guard and watched closely, ready to come to (y/n)‘s defense if anyone got creepy.

she danced and spun and rolled her body along to the beat of the songs, getting looser and more comfortable in her movements as time passed. two thirteen, he hadn’t come. one kiss, two kisses, grinding. two forty nine, no sight of him. hands were everywhere, all over her body. on her hips, on her breasts, on her arms. people were buying her shots, she was throwing them back. kuina had left. three eighteen. “(y/n).” she turned around all smiles and smudged mascara to see aguni standing in front of her, like a shark in a crowd of minos. people who realized his presence moved out of his way, cutting a clear path.

“hm?” she asked, continuing to dance. her vision was growing fuzzy and her mind was calm, it was only her and the music and the hands on her body. “you need to come with me.” he said. she raised an eyebrow. aguni was like a big brother to her, albeit a mean one. he let niragi pick on her most of the time. nonetheless, she’d trudge by his side and pretend she didn’t know what he and niragi were up to. pretend to be the doe faced lamb, destined for the slaughter. “why?” she asked, laughing. she spun and her ankle rolled, causing her to stumble. aguni grabbed her arm. “now.”

she frowned and protested as he all but dragged her out of the bar, hauling her around like she weighed nothing but a grape. he dragged her up the stairs and to hatters office, where he and niragi waited for her. “what’s goin’ on?” she slurred. “niragi informed me that you were.. giving out our secrets, (y/n).” hatter said. (y/n) looked at niragi like ‘what the fuck man’ as aguni held her upright. “i was.. literally with kuina all night. i’ve barely said two words because i’ve been so fucking..” in her drunken state, she managed to stop herself before she basically confessed her feelings for chishiya to her higher ups. “not the point, i didn’t tell anybody shit.” she said. hatter nodded at aguni to let her go. she fell into her own weight and rubbed her arm, scowling.

“am i interrupting something?” the three of them turned to see chishiya leaning against the doorway, quiet as a mouse. she hasn’t even heard him come in. “no.” she said, as the three boys behind her said ‘yes’. she turned and frowned deeply at them. her arm burned terribly. she moved her hand and looked down to see that it was bruised and irritated, with a few open cuts from aguni’s rings and fingernails. “(y/n) has been selling us out.” niragi purred as he took a few easy strides to her and lifted her chin with his fingertips. chishiya stiffened. “i can assure you, she’s been with me all night. she hasn’t said a thing to anybody.”

hatter turned to her. “is this true?” she nodded, obviously. why wouldn’t she? she was mad at chishiya, but if he wanted to bail her out of trouble she wouldn’t stop him. niragi sneered in her face and she bared her teeth at him, growling like an animal ready to pounce. “fine.” hatter turned his back and waved his hand, motioning for aguni to take her away. “but (y/n)…” he began. “you know what happens to traitors.” she scoffed. aguni reached for her and she stepped back, back into warm, calloused hands. they slid around her hips and warm breath caressed the side of her face. “i’ll take her, thanks.” she shivered at the sound of chishiya’s voice, at the way he sounded so irritated, at the way his hands gripped her hips a little harder as he turned her body and began leading her out of the room.

the moment the door closed behind them she was pulling away from him, all scowls and pissy attitudes. “don’t put your fucking hands on me.” she said, stopping her tracks. chishiya turned to face her, rolling his tongue in annoyance. “so.. you’ll curse at me, but not them?” he asked. her scowl deepened. she didn’t know how to respond. his eyes flickered to her bicep. “you’re bleeding.” he stated. “yeah, i noticed.” she grumbled, storming past him. he followed her, curling an arm around her waist and turning her body, redirecting her path. “i said don’t fucking touch me! where do you think you’re taking me?” she said angrily, too drunk to note how loud she was being or how crazy she probably seemed.

chishiya kept her on her feet as he lead her up the stairs, ignoring her protests and complaining. it took longer than it usually would to reach his bedroom due to her trying to turn around and escape his grasp every three seconds. he pushed the door open then ushered her inside, quickly closing it behind them. “what is your problem?” he asked. “what is YOUR problem?” she asked, raising her voice. she turned to face him as he stood against the door. “you think you can just— ghost me for three days and then show up and play night in shining armor then drag me to your room in what, in— in the hopes that i’ll fuck you or something?”

his jaw clenched. she stared at him, drunken anger and.. hurt, genuine hurt taking over her ability to think rationally. she thought they had bonded that night, thought they could be friends. she felt comfortable around him, she thought he felt comfortable around her too. he was quiet. she scoffed and shook her head as the hysterical giggles started. “unbelievable.”

she tried to push past him. he grabbed her shoulders and extended his arms, putting distance between them. “you’re bleeding.” he stated again. “i fucking KNOW, chishiya. get out of my way.” he gripped her wrists as she tried to push past him again and his strength scared her. he easily dragged her over to his bed and sat her down. “no.” she said, panic setting in. she began kicking her legs at him, getting him in the shins. “(y/n), stop!” she stopped and looked into his eyes for the first time in three days. his brown, open eyes. she stilled. he sighed and released her slowly, cautiously like she was a predator.

he turned and began digging through his bedside table, pulling out bandages, some sort of liquid in a small bottle and cotton balls. she watched quietly as he kneeled in front of her, her head spinning and thoughts clouded. “it will sting. don’t freak out.” she watched as he dumped the liquid onto a wad of cotton balls. his fingers brushed her arm so gently she almost didn’t feel it. he held his fingertips against bicep her to keep her still as he began patting the cotton onto her cuts, wiping away the blood and disinfecting the area. she winced, and she barely heard his murmured apology. it made her blush, made her feel warm inside. she hated it. hated him.

“you look like hell.” he said, standing to his full height. she frowned at him. “use my shower. there’s towels in there.” “don’t want to.” “that must suck.” he said before he grabbed her under her armpits and hauled her into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. “chishiya, let me out!” “i will. once you shower. you need to fix yourself and clean the wound thoroughly.” “are you saying i smell?” she could almost feel his smirk through the door. she flipped the door off, directing it at him spiritually. she grumbled as she stripped down to nothing, leaving her clothes in a pile behind the door. she turned the shower on and looked at herself in the mirror while she waited for it to warm up, assessing herself. smudged mascara, tired eyes, mussed hair from being thrown around, beaten up arm. men are just the kindest souls, don’t you think?

“(y/n), i know you’re not showering. the curtain didn’t open.” she scoffed. “i’m waiting for the water to heat!” she said as she stepped into the shower to get him to stop bothering her. the warmth caressed her senses immediately, lulling her into a calm state. the vapor in the air around her made her feel safe, like she was wrapped in a warm blanket. two minutes turned into twenty, and twenty into forty five. she was nearly asleep, sitting in the tub beneath the stream when chishiya knocked. “(y/n)? did you drown?” his voice came from behind the door. she chuckled. “you wish i had drowned.” she said. she had peed thrice since being in the shower, and she was halfway sober, aka way less drunk than she was originally.

“you should get out.” he said. “don’t want to.” she could sense the way he shook his head. “you’re a child.” “then you’re my daddy.” she said mindlessly. there was a pause. “(y/n), get out of there. now.” she groaned and whined as she hoisted herself up clumsily, like a deer on new legs. she flipped the water off and climbed out of the tub, quickly wrapping a towel around her body as to not let the cold get to her. she wrapped another towel around her hair haphazardly before she realized there were no clothes in the bathroom besides her dirty ones. she opened the door and stepped out, being faced with a cross-armed chishiya who looked like a dad waiting for his daughter to stop trying on dresses in the store. “i don’t have any clothes.” she said.

his eyes flickered downwards and she followed his gaze. there was a neatly folded pile of clothes to the left of her feet, outside the doorframe. “wow. ever so observant, huh mr. smart guy?” she said. he shrugged and smirked. she rolled her eyes as she bent to pick up the clothes and immediately shut the bathroom door behind her. her options were a tshirt and swim shorts, or a hoodie and boxers. his hoodie. the one she had never seen him go without wearing. her face flushed. she chose the jacket because his room was cold. at least that’s what she told herself.

she emerged from the bathroom about five minutes later to see chishiya on his bed. “welcome back, princess.” he muttered. he looked so.. amused. relaxed. nonchalant. she hated it. she walked over to him and crossed her arms. “what now?” he looked her over, taking his time before he stood. “let me see your arm.” she pulled up the sleeve of his jacket and let him see the wound, which was now clean but still red, irritated and stinging. “sit.” he said. she sat down on the bed slowly, shyly almost. he pulled out some ointment and the bandages from before and sat on the bed next to her, bringing her arm closer to him.

it was quiet as he gently dabbed the ointment onto her cuts, her watching him and him pretending to not know that she was watching him, or at least not care. he placed a soft medical cloth over the wound before wrapping it firmly in the bandages, patting it when he was done. “there.” she was frowning. she rolled her eyes and looked away when he looked at her. “most people would say thank you.” he said. she huffed. “you don’t deserve a thank you.” she saw the way he shook his head from the corner of her eye. “why?” “where have you been?” she snapped at him. his amused aura began to fade. “that’s nothing you need to worry about.”

“nothing i need to worry about? it’s been three days. i thought you were dead!” he smirked, but nothing could hide the irritation brewing in his eyes. “you know i’d never die.” “oh, give it up chishiya! you’re not indestructible! you can die and you’re about to if you don’t tell me where you’ve been!” “are you threatening me?” he asked, standing from beside her. he was frowning now. “yes, i am.” “don’t threaten me. i’ve done nothing but be here for you.” “be here for me my ass! you ditched me!” her voice was raising, the tension was growing. she stood as well, standing face to face with him. he was frowning, hard. “if you must know, i’ve been covering your ass the past three days. that shit you pulled with niragi nearly cost you your position and your life. don’t you see that? you’re reckless, (y/n). reckless and stupid.”

she faltered, taking a step back. her face began to burn in embarrassment and shame. “i’m not stupid.” she muttered, glaring up at him like a pouting child. “you’re acting like it. the more you mouth of to him the more you’re putting your neck on the line.” she had never seen chishiya so mad before, never seen him show so much emotion or speak so much at once. she was mad he was doing it to tell her off. she looked down and was quiet. “do you think its easy for me?” he asked. her eyebrows scrunched. “do you think i like watching you whore yourself around? like watching you come within a breath of death every time you step foot around niragi? we both know he’s a trigger happy moron, he’ll kill you (y/n). he’ll fucking kill you.”

that was the first time she’d ever heard chishiya cuss. she was mad he was cussing at her. she looked up at him to see his concerned, angry expression. concerned. concerned for her. his face softened and he sighed, his voice quieting. “you’re costing me too much.” he said. “what do you mean?” she didn’t understand. didn’t understand why he was covering for her, why he seemed upset that she could die. chishiya didn’t care for anything or anyone as far as she knew. “i didn’t come to the bar, or the pool, or to your room because i hate seeing you with other people. i hate seeing them lay their filthy hands on you. on your body. i hate it.”

she faltered again. “what..?” “i hate the way you take it.” he said. he took a step towards her, grabbing her by the hem of his jacket. “you hate them touching you but you won’t stop them. i think about you, worry about you day in and day out. i spend all of my time covering your sorry ass and keeping niragi away from you the most i can. you’re going to cost me my life, (y/n).” he said, gently wrapping his arms around her waist. she rested her hands on his chest shyly, feeling his heart beat beneath her fingers. she felt stone cold sober, the weight of his words hitting her like a truck. “i’m sorry.” she said finally, looking up at him, at the various emotions swirling in his eyes.

“you should be. you’re going to give me grey hairs.” she giggled quietly, noting their closeness. his hands felt so warm even through the fabric of the jacket. “i’m sorry.” she said again. his gaze moved downwards. “how’s your arm feeling?” he asked. she shrugged. “better, since you wrapped it. thanks, doctor.” he shook his head. she looked up at him, at the face she had grown to care so much for. she bit her lip. “chishiya..?” he met her gaze, locking eyes with her. one, two, three seconds went by. three seconds of consideration before her lips were on his. she kissed him fast and gently, pulling away when the feeling of embarrassment started flowing in her brain.

“uh— sorry. im sorry, i-“ she began pulling away from him, trying to get out of his arms. he easily turned their bodies and slammed her against the wall, holding her hips in a bruising grip. he leaned down so close their foreheads were nearly touching. “back out now or hold your peace.” he said, his voice low and heavily laced with something almost sadistic. she stayed quiet. he slammed his lips onto hers in an animalistic kiss without wasting a single second. it was so out of character for him, but she loved it. she had fantasized about this more times than she was willing to admit. fantasized about his hands on her body, his lips on hers, how he’d be. if he’d be rough, gentle, submissive, dominant, quiet, loud. all of it was coming to her.

“kill them.” he muttered against her lips as he kissed her, his hands squeezing and releasing her hips. she was out of breath, her vision fuzzy when he pulled away to begin kissing her neck. “huh?” “i’ll kill them. the next person to put their hands on you.” he said. her breath hitched at the feeling of his teeth grazing against a sensitive spot. he bit down harder, sucking a nice hickey onto it. “oh, please..” she began, dipping her toes in the kiddy pool of arousal. she wanted to see how he’d react to being teased. “you couldn’t kill anyone if you tried.” he growled against her skin before turning their bodies and shoving her down on his bed. “you have no idea.” he climbed on top of her sprawled body and pulled the zipper of his hoodie down almost violently, revealing her naked breasts.

he groaned at the sight of her peaked nipples just begging for his attention. “chishiya..” she whimpered, arching her back for him. she rubbed her thighs together mindlessly, overwhelmed with emotions. love, hate, lust. she hated the way he dissected her with his eyes, loved the way he made her feel, lusted for his touch. he ignored her sounds and began to palm her breasts, feeling them up. he ran his hands across her chest, down her abdomen and over her plush hips where bruising was starting to blossom from the amount of times he’d grabbed her there. “do you let them touch you like this?” he asked, tearing his jacket off of her and throwing it onto the floor.

she gasped but didn’t answer, earning a slap to her hip. it didn’t hurt, but it shocked her enough to gain her attention. “answer me. do you, huh? do you let them fuck you?” she shook her head no frantically, squirming beneath him as he began hastily pulling down his boxers from her body. he tossed those aside too, groaning. he sat up to take her appearance in fully. her wide pupils, her parted glossy lips, her mussed hair spread out behind her head like a halo, her arms by her head, her naked, beautiful body, ready and keening for him. he took in the way her chest rose and fell with each hard breath she took, the way she kept squirming her thighs together.

“where do you need me?” he asked. she bit her lip and whined as she rose her hips off the bed, pressing her core against him. “use your words. show me.” he smirked, amused by how easily she became so obedient and touch-drunk. she whimpered and began sliding her hand down her body slowly, making a show of it for him. even when she was hazy with want she managed to tease him, to drive him crazy. she cupped her cunt and slid a finger between her lips, feeling the warm wetness that had begun to gather at her needy hole. she pressed that finger against her clit and whimpered, beginning to rub slow circles around it. “here.” she breathed, “need you here.”

he exhaled heavily and got off of the bed, removing his swimming trunks. he undid the ties hastily but slowly pulled them down, letting her see his happy trail turn into a peek of his bulge, then letting his cock spring out fully. his tip was a pretty pale pink like his lips, aching and leaking with pre cum. in the midst of being away from her for a second, he realized that he didn’t know what felt good to her. he didn’t know her body, didn’t know what to do. he kept his composure calm as he directed her to scoot up the bed. when she had done so, he climbed back on top of her and pressed a hand against her throat, firm but not choking.

“tell me what you want.” he said. she shivered. the smell and the feeling of him against her body, knowing his cock was so close to where she needed it most was driving her insane. she swallowed her pride and ran her hands over his shoulders, looking into his eyes with her big doe ones. “want you to touch me, ‘shiya.. want you to make me feel good.” she mumbled, gasping as she felt his tip brush against her clit. “yeah?” he groaned into her ear, smirking against it. her skin felt so sensitive, like her senses were heightened by ten. she gasped as he began rubbing his tip between her lips, teasing her, pressing it hard against her entrance and then taking it away, making her whimper and squirm for him.

“yeah. please, chishiya fuck me.” she pleaded with him, her hands growing frantic against his body as he ground his cock against her. “mm.. do you deserve it?” he asked. “yes!” “i don’t agree.” he hummed. “you’ve been kicking me, cursing at me.. should i really touch you the way you want me to?” she was near tears, knowing she had been a brat to him. she felt bad, but she needed him so badly. it has been so long since she’d gotten laid, his stalling was making her impatient. “i’m sorry,” she whimpered, starting to press messy kisses across his face and neck, wherever she could reach. he hummed against her collarbone before he flipped them over, helping her to straddle his hips.

“take what you want from me.” he said. her face flushed at the idea. he had basically just handed her a credit card and told her to go crazy in her favorite store. she froze, unable to think. “what’s the matter, hm?” he purred, running his hands over her hips. “cat got your tongue? what happened to all that confidence of yours?” he teased her, and she pouted. shyly, she took his cock into her hand and slowly began pumping him, starting from the base and up to the tip, squeezing gently. he groaned and she sucked in a sharp breath, the noise making her throb. “are you okay with this?” she asked. he nodded. “take me.”

she nodded and wasted no time in lifting her hips and aligning his tip with her entrance. he kept a firm hold on her hips as she slowly lowered herself onto him, moaning at the pressure. he groaned and squeezed her tighter, encouraging her to continue. she sat still on him for a moment, letting both of them adjust to the feeling. when the pinching ceased, she lifted her hips again and arched her back, straddling him like she would a motorcycle. she looked back to watch herself as she rode him, reveling in his quiet groans and grunts as she took him into her tight cunt. “good.. thats good. keep going, pretty girl.” he purred, starting to help her when she faltered. he’d lift her hips for her and help ease her back down, sliding his hands to her ass to feel the way it jiggled when it came in contact with his pelvis.

“fuuuck..” he groaned, getting gradually more pussy drunk the more she rode him. “faster.” he started pushing her down onto his cock faster, impaling her on his thick length. she let him, her moans growing in volume as he fucked her. “shiya.. shiya, s’ so good..” she whimpered, balling her hands into fists on his chest, keeping herself upright as she half rode half took his cock. “yeah?” he asked, genuinely curious. he would never purposefully hurt her. even though he didn’t know her well, she had intrigued him from the moment they played their first game together, and that rarely ever happened. he stood on the sidelines watching her for ages, studying her, her behavior patterns, her flirting mechanisms, everything. he knew she had probably been with a lot of partners before, and that was fine. he just wanted to make sure that she felt good.

“yeah.. don’t stop.” she huffed out, her movements becoming sloppy. she ground her hips forward each time she came down, catching her clit on the neat patch of hair on his pubic bone and amplifying her pleasure. her tits began bouncing in his face as they sped up, mesmerizing him. “shit.. so pretty for me. just me.” he began groping them, flicking his thumbs over her perky nipples. she cried out, her cunt tightened around him and squeezing him tight, trying to milk him for all he had. she was babbling brainlessly now, saying how his cock felt so good inside her and how much she wanted him.

a shift of her hips had his tip rubbing perfectly against that sensitive, spongy spot inside of her, and she couldn’t help the loud moans that followed. chishiya’s face was flushed and his eyes were hazy with lust when she looked down at him, seeing the way he eyed her tits as he played with them. she could feel him throbbing inside her, signifying that he was close. “shiya.. gonna cum. wanna cum, please.” she whimpered. “yeah?” his eyes met hers as he trailed his hands down her body, settling on her waist. “cum for me. cum on my cock, pretty girl.” he groaned against her neck, licking and biting and sucking over the marks he had left previously.

a few more thrusts had her falling apart on his dick with loud, unceremonious cries, soaking her thighs, his pelvis, and a bit of the sheets below them. she rode out her orgasm on him, using him for her own pleasure. he slammed her down on him a few more times before his hips stuttered and his seed spilled inside of her warm pussy, filling her up. the feeling of his cock pulsing inside her as he came made her twitch in pleasure. she looked down at him, breathing hard, a small smile on her lips.

“so.. are you still mad at me?” she asked. he chuckled. “i feel as though i should be asking you that.” she giggled and leaned down, pressing her lips against his. it wasn’t like their other kisses, it was gentle and sweet, like an innocent first love. when she pulled away she was all smiles, and chishiya had a lazy grin on his face. they sat catching their breath for a moment, chishiya staying tucked comfortably inside her. “(y/n).” “hm?” “i’m serious about what i said. i’ll kill the next person to lay a hand on you.” she smiled dreamily, leaning down to press a chaste kiss against his lips. “i know, daddy.”

he stilled. she stilled. she regretted it immediately. “i’m sorry.” she mumbled, worry starting to show on her face. she watched his expression change from blank to primal before he suddenly flipped her over, trapping her body beneath his. “that little mouth of yours is gonna get you in trouble, bunny.” he groaned against her ear, trailing his hands against the curve of her ass before landing a hard slap against it. his cock was rock hard inside of her now, ready to go again. “say it again.” “daddy..” she whimpered softly, looking over her shoulder at him. he buried his fist in her hair and yanked her head back, pulling a moan from her sweet lips. “louder.” he growled as he pushed his hips against hers roughly, reaching deep inside her worn cunt. “daddy.” she mewled, her eyes rolling back at the feeling.

“yeah.. that’s right.” he began fucking into her, hard. his pelvis hit against her ass quick, pushing his cock deeper and deeper inside of her each time. his hand stayed tangled in her hair, his free hand resting on her throat, keeping her back arched for him as he kept her head back. her moans and cries only turned him on more, made him want to ruin her, to put his mark on her.

“who else can make you feel like this, huh?” he asked into her ear, biting down on her lobe. “who can make you cum like i can?” “n-nobody!” she mewled like a bitch in heat, joyfully letting him pound into her sopping cunt over and over again, pushing his seed deeper inside. “only you, only you!” she panted like a prayer, her hand resting atop of his, prying at his fingers as he tightened his hold on her throat. “god, (y/n).. you don’t know what you do to me.” he growled, squeezing her throat. “make me want to fucking ruin you.” her cunt spasmed around him hopelessly, sensitive from her previous orgasm. “shiya, can’t take it! s’ too much!”

she cried, but it fell upon deaf ears. he sped up, determined to push her to her limits, to mark her, to own her. “say my name.” “shiya..” “not that one.” he growled. she blushed as her lips parted obediently, the name he loved so much slipping past easily. “daddy.” he tugged her head back harder and attached his lips to her neck, creating more bright red hickeys for everyone to see. “that’s it.. yeah, fuck, that’s it girl. louder. let everyone know how good i make you feel.” he sped up, going harder inside her abused pussy. she moaned shamelessly, loudly, borderline pornographically as the sounds of his skin slapping against her ass competed with her in volume. “daddyyy! daddy, m’ gonna cum!” she warned him as her cunt tightened around him even harder than before, preparing to take him for all he’s worth.

“good,” he moaned. “cum for me, tell me how good i make you feel. go on, bunny. cum for me.” he coaxed her, pushing and pushing her buttons until she couldn’t take it anymore. he slammed into her even as she came again, pounding her like a toy, reveling in the way her beautiful cunt sucked him in greedily. his thrusts became sloppy soon after and he emptied himself inside her once more, burying himself to the hilt inside her warm pussy. he gave her ass a few hard slaps, leaving faint handprints, making her moan. she was panting and totally spent by the time his spurts of cum stopped, leaving her stuffed full and with a warm fuzzy feeling inside and out.

“you’re mine, (y/n).” he panted, pressing soft kisses against her face and shoulders, rubbing his hands gently over her bruised hips and red ass. “promise?” he chuckled. “i promise.”

he pulled out of her and helped her to sit upright before he started helping her clean up and get dressed. he helped her into his jacket and boxers, smoothing her hair away from her forehead and checking on her bandages while he was at it.

“are you okay?” he asked as he lied down with her, cradling her head to his chest. he rubbed little circles onto the palm of her hand with his thumb as she came down from her high and caught her breath. yeah..” she mumbled, exhausted. he nodded and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head. “i’m here.” he said.

the next morning, he was gone. her eyes fluttered open slowly, adjusting to the light that poured in from the still-open window. when she reached her hand out, his side of the bed was empty and cold, meaning he had been gone for a while. she sat up and looked to confirm, seeing a ruffled but empty mattress. she tucked her knees into her chest and stared blankly at the comforter, replaying the events of the night before. being worried off her ass, getting drunk, having several sets of hands at her at once, hatter accusing her of selling him out, aguni cutting her arm, chishiya bandaging her up and then fucking her until she couldn’t remember her name.

and now he was gone. typical chishiya. she should’ve expected it. she rolled out of bed and trudged into the bathroom to splash some water on her face and figure out what she wanted to do with herself. she saw her clothes behind the door and realized she wasn’t in her room. it was his. she frowned, quickly washed her face off and pulled her hair back before leaving the bathroom and sliding her shoes on. the moment she wrapped her fingers around the main door handle, it pushed open and revealed chishiya. her frown deepened and she tried to push past him, keeping her mouth shut.

“(y/n)?” he blocked the doorway and put a hand on her shoulder. “what?” she asked sharply, glaring at him. she crossed her arms. “what’s wrong?” he asked. “you left me. again.” “(y/n).. it’s eleven am. i was at the meeting. i tried to wake you and you told me to kill myself.”

her mouth fell open for a moment before she started laughing. she put her hands over her face and took a step back to let him into the room fully. “i don’t remember that, i’m so sorry.” she giggled, peeking from over her fingers at him. he shook his head and kicked the door shut behind him, holding up a small bag. “i told hatter you were sick with a hangover. i brought food.”

he lead her to the bed and let her sit down, taking a seat next to her. he began setting out the contents of the bag, pulling out some fruits, bread, and other mundane things of the like. she ate quietly as he checked on her bandages, telling her that he’d have to change them later.

“chishiya?” “hm?” she set her bread aside and looked into his eyes. “can you promise me something?” his expression softened and he ran his thumb over her bandages. “i can try.” “promise me that.. we’ll get out of here together. no more disappearing from me.” she said. he nodded. “okay. i can promise that.”

she smiled and leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips, reveling in the way he leaned into her touch.

being in the borderlands was hard. being an alleged spoiled bimbo was harder. but having chishiya as a companion made the struggle worth it. she kissed him again, knowing they might not make it out together, but the thought was enough for her to try.

[mynonclicheblog]

One final Never Have I Ever love triangle thematic analysis

I've said this in one of my posts before, but the narrative is always going to favor what is best for Devi. A lot of what makes this show so juicy to dive into is because so much of its meaning is rooted in symbolism and higher concepts, not just the individual interactions you're looking at onscreen!

I think that's what doesn't work for some (not all) pro-Dxton anti-Ben folks. They see Paxton being respectful and kind to Devi, they see that he's the attractive object of her desire from day 1, and they see that the two of them genuinely do connect and help each other in certain ways. But when these same people look at Benvi, they only see Ben making obnoxious comments to Devi (+ others), they see childish behavior and mistakes being made, and they see them frequently butting heads due to their shared competitive nature.

And honestly? I get it. These conclusions are easy to come to when you're looking at the surface, but they don't take into account the full story that's being told.

Let's get into it. 😎👇

So I mentioned the idea of what is best for Devi. Not what is best for any regular person out there -- what is best for Devi Vishwakumar! Our girl expresses in no uncertain terms that she enjoys her hypercompetitive rivalry-turned-bond with Ben ("Ben's smart and we talk- mostly argue- for hours!" // "I don't want to break up with Ben. He really pushes me.") The fact that they fight and compete is not a detriment to their compatibility, it is actually the thing that makes him most desirable in her mind. She would not have wanted to be with him in the first place if this were not true. Their sharp-tongued communication style may not be the standard picture of a 'healthy' relationship for most people, but, well. Devi and Ben are far from most people.

Devi is an incredibly emotional, dynamic person who's always searching for another high. The competitive nature of her relationship with Ben is enough to satisfy her itch for novelty/excitement (her differences with Paxton don't hit this box), yet Ben's presence also provides a comforting long-term consistency in her life. He's seen the very best and the very worst of her and he always comes back. He frequently brings Devi back to herself, too, when she loses sight of what matters (friendships, family, sense of self, her goals, etc).

Then there's the dream vs. reality dichotomy that very much applies to this love triangle. Simple as it may be, it's accurate. I believe it was built that way on purpose because of how well it reflects Devi's relationships to Mohan and Nalini, which is the beating heart of what NHIE is all about. One (Mo/Pax) is more outwardly palatable than the other and provides an easygoing, self-soothing escapism that she needs in order to work through her grief. This person represents youth and the rose-colored past; Devi's tendency to idealize and indulge. The other person (Nal/Ben) is sharper around the edges, a bit harder to swallow, but pushes Devi to do better and supplies the support she needs. This person represents Devi's grounded reality; her time in the present and the woman she is growing into.

They are both important pieces in Devi's journey, but the themes of past vs present speak for themselves. The past is something we keep close to our heart- in this case, it's someone who has impacted us that we'll always carry with us. But the ultimate goal is to move forward from that. The central relationship of Never Have I Ever, in my opinion, is that of Devi & Nalini as they heal and grow together. In terms of Devi's romantic life, her relationship with Ben is the one that more closely shadows the series arc between her & Nalini.

I'd like to address some things by the individual season now. One of my observations watching s1 for the first time was that Paxton was usually aligned with bad things in Devi's life, whereas Ben was aligned with the good. e.g., Paxton was in some way the source of Devi's falling outs with El/Fab and Nalini; Ben is the one who repaired those relationships. These things aren't Paxton's fault, nor do I place any blame on him. They're just subtle narrative choices that send up unspoken flags saying, hey look, this isn't the right person for her. This theme was left behind in s1 for the most part, but given that it was NHIE's debut season, it planted several seeds for me about who the boys were for Devi and how they fit into her world.

Season 2 does a lot to sort out the difference in what Devi thinks she wants (Paxton) and what her heart truly wants (Ben). Yes, I'm going there, too: head vs heart. Devi's underlying preference for Ben > Paxton should be easy to spot as early as 2x01 -- if only for the fact that Devi finally bagged the hot guy of her dreams, and yet, choosing to be with him isn't easy for her. In fact, as both Devi and Eleanor confirm later, she wanted to choose Ben in the first place. Like... that is crazy when you think about it!!! Despite all the pieces falling into place for her and Paxton, and against her friends' shallow advice, she decides that she won't let go of Ben. Instead, she makes the misguided decision to date both. This isn't the kind of mistake she'll ever make again. It isn't Devi acting out because of Ben -- it signals a profound attachment to him when, all things considered, picking Paxton should have been a no brainer. That revealed everything I needed to know in order to understand that being with Paxton wasn't what she wanted in her heart of hearts.

Then, of course, 3x10 brings that all home with the stomach knots comparison. It tells us that, ever since Devi and Paxton moved into a place of genuine friendship, with him no longer on a pedestal, those romantic feelings (esp. on her part) have dissipated. As a bonus, Devi even explicitly states that Paxton was a dream! Ben, however -- her flawed reality -- is the one who still gives her butterflies. This is the result of Devi's slow awakening to her true inner self, the Devi who values realness and authenticity and loving through imperfection. It's a step closer to the complete acceptance of herself. (Notice as well that right after this point, it becomes more undeniable than ever that Ben is who she wants to be with.)

As long as Paxton was a romantic possibility for Devi, their relationship was tied to her feelings of insecurity and inferiority. Again this is not Paxton's fault -- he assures her of the opposite all the time -- but this is Devi's story, and we are shown over and over that Devi fears true vulnerability with Paxton (both sexually and emotionally). Compare this to the way she has always felt confident, seen, driven, and unabashedly herself in her relationship with Ben, even when they were enemies. At a glance Devi may appear to act more immature in Ben's orbit, but the truth is that she grows with him more than anyone else (besides Nalini) thanks to Ben's penchant for encouraging accountability and showing her that actions can have consequences.

Anyway, TLDR version:

Paxton = Devi's youth, Mohan, grief, distraction, the past, idealism, and the head (constructed ideas).

Ben = Devi's future, Nalini, healing, confrontation, the present, reality, and the heart (authentic truths).

Never Have I Ever's romantic story structure rests on the premise of these symbolic definitions. They are gospel, and while the characters will grow and change and become better versions of themselves, they will do so within the lines that are already drawn. The lines exist for a reason -- they are a narrative tool! These characters cannot and should not 'grow out' of their roles because those roles are their identities within the show's framework. The characters are exactly who they are meant to be right through to the end. They are symbols. If that's not your cup of tea then so be it! But there's nothing wrong with this writing style. In fact it's one of my personal favorites because everything is so neatly defined, yet fascinating to read into 🥰

The imperfect Ben had to be Devi's true love because her love interests are, in a way, reflections of herself. By no fault of his own, Devi always felt the need to be "perfect" for Paxton because that's how she viewed him; a false paragon of everything she wanted to be. That is the point of their story together. Her acceptance of the deep love she has for Ben (and Nalini!), despite his sometimes off-putting demeanor, is aligned with Devi's acceptance of her own imperfections -- that she is hot-headed, she can be self-absorbed, she acts without thinking and makes mistakes -- but that she is also brilliant and driven and caring and radiant, and she is equally worthy of receiving the love that she has to offer others.

Narratively speaking, it was never truly a competition.

[shesmore-shoebill]

since you mentioned an angel in neon blue as one of your faves…..your top 5 amangela fics perhaps? some honorary mentions too if there’s too many? 👀

Sorry for the delay on this, life got busy and then more busy instead of less busy and I wanted to give this ask its deserved amount of consideration.

anyway. Five is HARD. I will do my best. Order is not indicative of anything bc I've agonized long enough as it is. I've tagged folks + linked directly to their posts where I could find their associated tumblr post, and links to AO3 where I couldn't.

Also I cheated and made a separate list for NSFW ones. Partly because I know some people don't want to read NSFW. and to cheat a little on the 5 restriction.

As always, RPF with F as in fiction. From what I recall, none of these are attempting to speculate or make any actual statements about real people, they're all just works of fiction I like.

if anyone wants me to remove a link to their fic or a tag for any reason, let me know.

close my eyes (and fantasize) by @baflegacy

listen. I am a fucking sucker for well intentioned and realistic miscommunication that stems from care and then goes wrong. I love a thing where someone cares about someone and thats why they're worried and the worry also means they are a little mad and a little hurt bc fuck, i want to help you, why arent you talking to me about this, did i do something, crossed with the other person doing everything in their power to do the exact thing driving them up the wall, because they genuinely care so much about the other person that its skewing their judgement. People who care and people who fuck up. I'll eat it up every time, and this one is written in a way that feels so real. 👌👌👌👌

the devil is in the details by @skiespeaches

this is a newer fic and its still in progress atm and so theres a chance it gets bumped into NSFW territory 😅 but im really enjoying it!!! The dynamic between Amanda and Angela takes the competitive edge we can see in videos and makes it into something phenomenal. Its got such strong tension and pacing, and its also got. REALLY GOOD COMMUNICATION. People react realistically and have reasonable fears and doubts but everyone also talks about them and trusts each other and its just so satisfying to read as a result. And it STILL does the tension and the 👀👀👀👀👀 so well. Guess its kind of funny to put this and the prior recc right next to each other but I genuinely love both of these. Communication and humans are weird.

not strong enough by @moviemandy

i love a disaster angela fic as much as anyone but because I feel like that trope is established among smosh rpf, I love having that get subverted even more. More Amanda getting comforted!!! yeah!!!!!And the way the dynamic and emotions are written in this one is especially satisfying to me, they all feel very real, and sweet. :') Also, Im always a sucker for the trope where someone tries to deflect from their issues by taking care of someone else and then gets CALLED OUT FOR IT. also, double bonus, this fic can be read completely platonically. :]

a field of yellow flowers by @unknownteapot

gah this one has so many layers and elements to it, its such a damn delight to reread. the bittersweetness of it all really 👌👌👌👌. Grudging respect and admiration in an awful space, magnetism of people who both deeply want to love each other and really don't (but they do). The world feels very realized and that's so important bc the fic clearly sets up the interplay as like. The two of them and also the world they are in as a distinct three players in the story. This fic has so many emotions!!! gut punch of an end! you feel for both of them so deeply by the end.

i've been having revelations by @poppyfamily

slight cheating bc this is courtmangela but it should still count imo!!! It contains another classic trope of people who care about each other deeply and it being percieved by other people before they clock it themselves. Its something I like specifically as a writing trope and only executed in specific ways- caring deeply and being affectionate does not HAVE to mean you want to sleep with or are in love with someone, and IRL assumptions about that can be. Infuriating. But love how this fic does it. :) Also its funny and it feels very genuine and the voices all sound. right. I love fics with lots of cuts where so much is said in tiny details and tiny moments, it makes the world feel very fleshed out. Also, Courtmangela as a band is just a blessed concept.

NSFW fics:

lets make this bed get squeaky by baflegacy

This rewrote my goddamn brain chemistry actually. Like yes, this one is hot, but the parts that really hooked into my brain are not exclusively the spicy bits. Pining RPF Amanda is SO important to my brain, and that dynamic of an Amanda silently losing her mind and Angela also silently losing her mind but slightly more at peace about it, combined with their very genuine friendship keeping things fine and then. and THEN. well.

personal leisure by unknownteapot

hey this fic is hot as hell. Its extremely well written. But also besides the nsfw parts the banter and the sort of instant connection all feel very real and unforced and i love that the end of the fic feels so open ended but also so light and hopeful and sweet. choosing to believe they meet for coffee the next day and it all goes swimmingly.

like she wants to try me on by baflegacy

this fic is about amanda in the submissive and breedable outfit and angela. It accomplishes eveeything you could want from that. Its Very nsfw. its VERY good. Writing smut is difficult on multiple levels- keeping it logistically and emotionally sound while keeping it spicy. It does all three really well. also the aftercare moment is really sweet. :]

bonus: its the subject of this ask so i didnt include it but shout out to an angel in neon blue- the tension is INCREDIBLE and the way the ending recontextualizes everything and leaves you unsure who was really in control the whole time is like. really impressive. The characterization is SO strong and feels so true to the Sarah Christ we know and creates an equally strong Creekside Killer characterization to juxtapose it. 👌

[crispychann]

Unspoken :

A Tooru Oikawa fic!

Word Count : 3206

Genre: Slight fluff, angst

Humans, the one thing we love to do the most is to regret things. Of course, this is ironically speaking. Overthinking and letting an opportunity pass, wanting to never leave the comfort zone, thinking about the consequences, and more reasons lead to regrets.

What was the one thing you regretted not doing in the last semester of your school life? Was it procrastinating too much and having heaps to study before the exam? Or was it not spending enough time with other people outside your close friends, whom you would never see again? You’d like to be optimistic, but let’s be honest. It would be difficult to keep in touch with others, even your best friends. It’s not going to be the same as school. Or do you regret the several missed opportunities where you could have talked to Oikawa but backed away because you were scared?

You mostly regretted the last thing—not talking to Oikawa Tooru when you had the chance to. Nay, plenty of chances. You’ve always thought Oikawa was amazing. You attended all his matches mainly to support your school. The matches were always very intense, and you admired every player. They were all talented and deserved to win.

At first, you visited because you had heard about the intensity of these matches. The way everyone at school, including your best friends, spoke about it made it even more intriguing. They were not wrong. These volleyball matches were very intense, often against powerhouses, always keeping you on the edge of your seat.

During these matches, it was impossible not to notice the captain of Seijō, Oikawa Tooru. Oikawa is the kind of setter who knows his team inside out. He is fiercely competitive, always aiming to be the best, yet he balances this with genuine care for his teammates, understanding their strengths and weaknesses, and bringing out the best in each of them. He is an even better captain who always tries to keep the team spirit high, especially during tough situations. He knows his play, and he knows he’s good at it. What’s even more amazing than all this is his serve. His serve sends shivers down his opponents' spines. Even experienced players wish they never had to receive it. His serve streak is almost impossible to cut off.

Despite his massive talent, he continues to work hard and move forward. He practices till late every day and is never satisfied until he sees the results. Iwa, his best friend, basically drags him off the court every evening; otherwise, Oikawa wouldn’t leave.

Phew, that doesn’t even cover half of it. Okay, maybe you know a little more than necessary as just a mere spectator of the game. Only because you found Oikawa charming. Honestly, who wouldn’t? His presence is magnetic; you can't help but be captivated by the way he carries himself, brimming with confidence and playful charm. His smile always tinged with a mischievous glint, is infectious, lighting up any room he enters.

You admired him.

You wish you were as passionate as Oikawa about something but you just hadn't found that out yet.

It was not that long ago since you came across an empty volleyball court. Impossible you thought to yourself. You wanted to take a little peek inside to see if there was actually no one there. You opened the door carefully as you didn't want to make any noise and draw attention to you. Technically speaking it was your gym as much as it was the team’s. But everyone knows who needs the gym the most. The volleyball team obviously.

To your surprise, you were quite right. The gym was empty but the nets were still up and trolleys of balls were left outside the court instead of the store room. That was the perfect opportunity to address your curiosity. You have always wondered how it feels to hold the ball. You’ve never held a volleyball in your lifetime. You did not know if it was heavy or light. Are the balls so light that the spikers smash them to the ground effortlessly? The way it is served and the way that it is received? You were curious about everything. You were nearing the end of school. You wanted to try this out as volleyball was your school’s spirit after academics of course. You slowly approached to trolley and picked up a ball.

It was not as light as you expected it to be but it was not too heavy either. ‘Mmm not too bad’. You first tried to play with yourself. You just tried to hit the ball with your forearms, trying so hard to not drop it. ‘That wasn't that difficult, maybe I'm a natural’ you whisper to yourself. Now that you had boosted your ego, you wanted to serve from one side of the net to the other side. How hard could that be? You quickly threw the ball up in the air and slapped it real hard with your palm. BAD CHOICE. VERY HARD AND PAINFUL.

‘Son of a-’ you started to swear but you had to stop halfway because you heard someone laughing from behind where the storeroom was. Was it someone from the team? The coach perhaps? It was too embarrassing for you to turn around now.

‘You want to serve the ball to the other side of the court, not hurt your palm during the process’ a voice added. You had to turn around to avoid being rude. You were going to graduate soon and it is not like the whole team saw you anyway. ‘Can’t be that embarrassing’ you said to make yourself feel better.

Turns out it was just Oikawa who saw you and had a good time laughing from behind.

You knew a lot about him. How he plays, how he handles his team and how he reacts when he wins and loses his matches but you’ve never heard him speak. You had been in the same school for years yet neither of you had made a single conversation with the other till now. Surprising because you both are in the same year level but yet your worlds seem miles apart.

You turned around, cheeks burning with embarrassment, to find Oikawa leaning casually against the doorframe, a playful smirk on his face. “Need some help?” he offered, his voice friendly and inviting. “Uh, yeah, that would be great,” you stammered, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness. Here he was, Oikawa Tooru, offering to teach you how to play volleyball.

He walked over, taking the ball from your hands. “First, you need to hold the ball like this,” he said, demonstrating the proper grip. “And when you serve, you want to hit it with the base of your palm, like this.” He tossed the ball up and effortlessly served it over the net.

You watched in awe as the ball sailed perfectly to the other side. “Wow,” you breathed. “That was amazing.”

Oikawa chuckled, handing the ball back to you. “Your turn. Don’t worry, I’ll guide you.”

You took a deep breath, trying to calm your racing heart. Following his instructions, you tossed the ball up and hit it with the base of your palm. The ball made it over the net, barely not as gracefully as Oikawa’s serve.

“Not bad for a first try,” he said encouragingly. “With a bit more practice, you’ll get the hang of it.”

“I think I'm just seven years too late for that” you chuckle.

“Who says you can’t catch up? Arent you a natural y/n?” he retorted.

He had clearly heard you talking to yourself before.

“Can’t argue there Tooru. You better watch your back” you continued the banter. He couldn't contain his smile.

“I’m truly scared now” he replied. Before you could say anything else you heard another voice at the entrance of the gym “You better be scared Tooru because you were supposed to leave 30 minutes ago like you promised” Iwa deadpanned.

Before you could comprehend what was going on Tooru dashed to the bleachers to grab his kit. You did not blame him. Iwaizumi is a scary man. scary only because he cares for Oikawa and his teammates so dearly. Unlike Oikawa, you have spoken to Iwaizumi several times. You used to share a table with him a few years back. The good old days. If it wasn't for all the intense practices and matches the school went to, you and Iwaizumi could have been good friends. He’d miss some of the classes due to the matches and the other times he’d leave the next minute after the bell goes off to his practice. However, you still had fun with him when you sat together. You could almost call him a friend.

“Y/n, oh gosh how long has it been?” Iwa yelled out from the door walking towards the both of you. You could hear the excitement in his voice”

“Iwa!” you waved at him. Oikawa was surprised by this interaction. He didn't know that you both already knew each other. “Just when I was about to introduce to each other haha. Did not see this coming” he said to Iwaizumi.

“Neither did I Tooru, because y/n never used to set foot in the gym back when we used to be classmates. I practically used to beg her to.”

He was right. It was a few years ago but Iwa always tried to get you to come see the practice match and spend some time with him. You’d always come up with an excuse to avoid going to the gym. Mainly because you were lazy. Secondly, at the start of high school, you had to muster enough self-esteem to enter a gym teeming with boys, where the overwhelming presence and energy could be felt from a distance. The thought of all their eyes turning toward you as you entered was something you couldn’t bear then, and still can't now.

You couldn't help but feel guilty. That could have been the beginning of a beautiful friendship. A beautiful friendship that you never gave a chance to.

Your eyes gave it away. Iwa had to fill in the silence.

“I’m obviously kidding Y/N. please do not feel guilty. Besides you come to most of our matches now. I am very happy that you support us so please do not feel guilty” he said sweetly.

“I’m glad I started coming to the matches Iwa, honestly they are so worth it” you finally responded politely.

Iwaizumi grinned and gave you a nod before finally turning to Oikawa. “Home. Now” he ordered to Oikawa and slowly made his way back to the door and decided to wait for Oikawa.

“I’m sorry our practise sesh was cut short by Iwa Chan y/n. It was nice meeting you today,” he said hurriedly but you could also sense the genuineness from his tone.

“It’s alright, Tooru. I really appreciate the help. It was nice finally talking to you,” you replied with a smile.

He nodded, glancing at Iwaizumi who was waiting impatiently at the door. “We should do this again sometime. Maybe when Iwa isn’t around to drag me away,” he joked, winking at you.

You laughed softly, feeling a warmth spread through you. “I’d like that. Maybe I’ll even get better at serving.”

“I have no doubt you will,” Oikawa said, his eyes twinkling. “Just keep practising. And hey, if you ever need a coach, you know where to find me.”

A smile crawled upon your face.

As he started to walk away, he turned back one last time. “Goodnight, Y/N. And don’t be a stranger, alright?”

“Goodnight, Tooru. I will try my best” you chuckled, watching as he jogged over to Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi gave you a small wave and a smile before they both exited the gym. You stood there for a moment, processing everything that had happened. Your heart was still racing, but this time it wasn’t just from nerves—it was from mere excitement and a possibility of something. Maybe a friendship, maybe an inspiration or maybe something more.

It had been three months since that had happened. Even though Tooru said not to be a stranger, you were one. You went to all of their matches and cheered them on like you usually would. You would want to approach Oikawa in the hallway but you were always scared to do so. What if he was just being friendly? What if he was just trying to be polite? What if he actually has so much on his plate that he forgot about the whole interaction that we had? Why hasn't he approached me? You couldn't get these negative thoughts out of your head.

The school halls became a battleground of stolen glances. You'd catch sight of him laughing with his friends, his smile as radiant as ever, and your heart would skip a beat. Sometimes, you’d notice him looking your way, a fleeting glance that made your pulse race. It happened during class changes, in the cafeteria, and even during matches. You’d be in the stands, cheering along with the rest of the crowd, and sometimes, during a timeout, you’d see him scan the audience. Your eyes would meet for a brief second, a silent exchange that spoke volumes. In those moments, you felt a connection, a pull that urged you to break through your hesitation.

But the doubt remained. What if you were misreading everything? What if his smiles and glances were just friendly, nothing more? The uncertainty kept you frozen, unable to take that step forward.

The final match of the season was the most intense yet. Seijō was neck and neck with their opponent, and every point was fiercely contested. During a timeout, Oikawa looked over to the stands, his eyes searching. When they found yours, he smiled—a small, private smile that seemed meant just for you. Your heart soared, but the insecurity held you back.

After the match, the team celebrated their hard-earned victory. You stood on the sidelines, clapping along with everyone else, your eyes fixed on Oikawa. He was surrounded by his teammates, laughing and talking animatedly. You saw Iwaizumi give him a knowing look and nudge, pointing in your direction. Oikawa’s gaze followed, and for a moment, you thought he might come over. But then he was swept up in the post-match excitement, and the moment passed.

The days turned into weeks, and your silent longing only grew. Each time you saw him, the urge to talk to him intensified, but you never ended up doing it. You imagined conversations in your head, what you would say, how he might respond. But when the moment came, your courage faltered, and you would retreat into the safety of your routines.

Finally, the last day of school arrived. The halls were filled with students saying their goodbyes, reminiscing about the years they had spent together. You felt a pang of regret as you realized this was your last chance. You took a deep breath and decided to take one final look at the gym, hoping to find Oikawa there.

The gym was empty, the nets down, and the lights dimmed. You walked slowly, your footsteps echoing in the quiet space. Memories of the past few months flooded your mind, and you couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of regret for all the missed opportunities.

As you turned to leave, you heard a familiar voice. “Y/N.”

You spun around to see Oikawa standing in the doorway, his expression a mix of surprise and relief. “Tooru,” you whispered, your heart pounding.

He walked over, his gaze never leaving yours. “I was hoping to find you here,” he said softly. “I guess we both had the same idea.”

You nodded, swallowing hard. “I didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye.”

Oikawa hesitated, then asked, “Why didn’t you ever approach me?”

You looked down, feeling the weight of his question. “I… I don’t know,” you admitted. “Why didn’t you?”

He sighed, frustration evident in his voice. “I don’t know either. But I’ve wanted to for so long.”

You looked up, meeting his eyes. “Me too. There were so many times I wanted to talk to you, but something always held me back.”

A moment of silence passed, filled with the weight of all the unspoken words and missed opportunities. “Why did we have to meet this late, huh?” you said, your voice tinged with sadness.

“Timing,” Oikawa said with a bitter smile. “Timing is always a bitch.”

He paused, then continued, “I’m going to play volleyball in college. What about you?”

You shrugged, feeling a lump in your throat. “I haven’t decided yet. Everything feels so uncertain.”

He nodded, his expression softening. “You’ll figure it out. You’re incredible, Y/N. Don’t ever doubt that.”

“Thank you, Tooru,” you whispered, tears threatening to fall. “Good luck with everything. I know you’ll be amazing.”

There was a long pause, both of you standing there, the air heavy with everything left unsaid. Oikawa broke the silence first, his voice gentle. “Do you mind if we… hug? Just as a friendly goodbye?”

You smiled, feeling a mix of relief and sadness. “I’d like that.”

He stepped closer, his arms wrapping around you in a warm, comforting embrace. You hugged him back, holding on tightly as if trying to make up for all the missed chances in this one moment. The hug was long, lingering, filled with all the unspoken words and what-ifs. You could feel the regret and longing in the way he held you, and you knew he felt it too.

As you stood there, wrapped in his arms, you both understood the significance of this hug. It wasn’t just a friendly gesture—it was a farewell to what could have been, and a tentative promise for what might still come. The regret of missed opportunities weighed heavily, but there was also a sense of closure, of acknowledging what you had shared, however fleeting.

Finally, Oikawa pulled back slightly, looking into your eyes. “You’re going to do great things, Y/N. I know it.”

“Thank you, Tooru. So will you,” you said, your voice thick with emotion.

He released you reluctantly, and you both stepped back, the moment hanging in the air. “It was really nice getting to know you, Oikawa,” you said softly.

“It was really nice getting to know you too, Y/N,” he replied, his eyes reflecting the same mix of emotions.

Just before you turned to leave, he reached into his pocket and handed you a small piece of paper. “Here’s my number. Maybe we can keep in touch.”

You took it, your heart swelling with a mix of hope and sadness. “Thank you, Tooru. I’d like that.”

He smiled, a hint of the mischievous glint you had come to admire. “Take care, Y/N.”

“You too, Oikawa.”

With one last lingering look, you both turned and walked away, parting ways with heavy hearts. As you left the gym, you felt the weight of all the missed chances pressing down on you. But there was also a glimmer of hope—a possibility that maybe, just maybe, you could reconnect and build something new.

[timeless-fanfic]

A Playful First Kiss

Word Count: 1312

John x Reader

Note: This is the other part to the Andrew/John request from earlier this evening!

The sun was beginning to set, casting a warm orange glow over the fields as John and [Y/N] made their way back from a day of errands in the town. The soft rustle of leaves in the breeze and the distant sounds of towns people going about their evening routines filled the air. The day had been long, but John had a lightness in his step—one that [Y/N] couldn’t help but notice.

"Did you see the way that one merchant tried to haggle with you?" John chuckled, looking over at her with a grin. "He didn’t stand a chance."

[Y/N] laughed softly, nudging his shoulder with her own. "I’ve learned not to let anyone take advantage of me when it comes to business."

"Clearly," John teased. "I think you had him regretting every coin he asked for by the end of it."

She smiled, but there was a flicker of something deeper in her gaze—an unspoken bond between them that had been growing over time. John had always been kind and thoughtful, but there was a playful side to him that only came out when they were together. The more they spent time like this, the harder it became for [Y/N] to ignore the feelings blooming in her heart.

As they neared the small stream that cut through the fields, John stopped, looking out at the glistening water. "Remember when we first met here?" he asked, his voice softening.

[Y/N] paused, her heart giving a small flutter at the memory. It had been a chance encounter—a moment that had marked the beginning of their friendship. But since then, something deeper had started to grow between them. Something neither of them had quite acknowledged out loud.

"How could I forget?" she replied, her voice filled with warmth.

John gave her a playful smile. "I still think you were following me."

[Y/N] scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Oh, please. You wish."

"Well, it worked out in my favor, didn’t it?" John said, his grin widening. "Otherwise, I wouldn’t have met someone who keeps me on my toes."

[Y/N] felt her cheeks flush at the way he was looking at her—his eyes soft, full of affection. She tried to play it off, but there was no denying the growing tension between them. John’s teasing was familiar, but there was something new in the air, something that made her pulse quicken just a little bit more.

"You’re full of yourself today, aren’t you?" she teased back, though her voice was lighter than usual.

John laughed, a sound that never failed to make her smile. He moved closer to the water’s edge, crouching down to pick up a smooth stone. "How about a race?"

She raised an eyebrow. "A race? Across the stream?"

"No," he said with a grin. "Skipping stones."

[Y/N] smirked, folding her arms. "You think you can beat me?"

John gave her a challenging look. "I know I can."

"All right," she said, stepping closer to the water with determination. "You’re on."

They both searched for the perfect stones, examining the shapes and weight before finding what they needed. The friendly competition brought out their playful sides, and soon they were laughing and skipping stones, each one trying to outdo the other.

John’s first stone skipped three times before sinking into the water. "Not bad," he said, giving her a satisfied smile.

[Y/N] narrowed her eyes playfully. "Watch and learn."

With a flick of her wrist, her stone skipped four times, sailing across the surface before disappearing into the water. She turned to John with a triumphant grin. "Beat that."

John stared at her for a moment, pretending to be offended. "Beginner’s luck," he muttered.

[Y/N] laughed, the sound bubbling up easily. She hadn’t felt this carefree in a long time, and it was all because of John. His presence had become something steady in her life, something she looked forward to more than she cared to admit.

John picked up another stone, but before he could throw it, [Y/N] splashed water toward him with her foot, catching him off guard. "Hey!" he exclaimed, dropping the stone as he jumped back.

She laughed again, clearly proud of herself. "You were taking too long."

"Oh, now you’ve done it," John said with a mock-serious tone, stepping toward her.

Before she could react, he bent down and splashed water right back at her, drenching her feet. [Y/N] gasped, half in shock, half in amusement. "John!"

He grinned, mischief written all over his face. "Fair’s fair."

Without thinking, [Y/N] retaliated, splashing him again, and soon they were both laughing uncontrollably as water flew between them. It was childish, it was silly, and yet it felt perfect. In that moment, there was nothing but them and the playful banter that had always defined their relationship.

But as they stood there, breathless from laughter, something shifted. The playful teasing quieted, and John looked at her with an intensity she hadn’t seen before. His eyes softened, his expression turning serious as he took a small step closer to her.

"Hey," he said, his voice gentle now, almost tentative. "You…you know you mean a lot to me, right?"

The shift in tone caught [Y/N] off guard, and her heart began to race for a different reason. She nodded, suddenly feeling the weight of the moment. "I know," she whispered.

John’s gaze lingered on hers, and before either of them could stop it, the space between them closed. He reached out, his hand brushing against hers, and in that small touch, there was something unspoken, something that had been building for weeks, maybe even months.

[Y/N]’s breath caught in her throat, but she didn’t pull away. Instead, she found herself stepping closer, her heart pounding as the distance between them disappeared entirely.

And then, without warning, John leaned in.

It was a soft, tentative kiss at first, as though he was afraid of pushing too far. But when [Y/N] didn’t pull away—when she pressed into the kiss just as much—he deepened it, his hand gently cupping her cheek.

The world around them seemed to fade, leaving only the two of them in that moment. It wasn’t the kiss of two people caught in passion; it was the kiss of two people who had built something over time, something grounded in friendship and trust. It was soft, sweet, and everything [Y/N] hadn’t realized she’d been waiting for.

When they finally pulled apart, both of them were breathless, their foreheads resting together as they stood there in the fading light. John’s hand still lingered on her cheek, his thumb gently brushing against her skin.

"Sorry," he whispered, though the smile on his lips suggested he wasn’t sorry at all.

[Y/N] smiled back, her heart still racing. "Don’t be."

John chuckled softly, his breath warm against her skin. "I guess…I just couldn’t help myself."

"I’m glad you didn’t," she replied, her voice barely above a whisper.

For a long moment, they just stood there, the weight of the day melting away as they took in what had just happened. There was no need for words—not now. Everything they needed to say had been said in that kiss.

Eventually, John pulled back slightly, his eyes still soft as he looked at her. "You know," he said with a playful smile, "I’m still faster than you."

[Y/N] laughed, shaking her head. "You just had to ruin the moment, didn’t you?"

John grinned, his teasing nature back in full force. "What can I say? I couldn’t let you have all the victories today."

[Y/N] gave him a playful shove, but her smile never wavered. As they turned to walk back toward the village, hand in hand, she couldn’t help but feel that everything had changed between them.

But in the best possible way.

[monstersdownthepath]

Monster Spotlight: Succubus

CR 7

Chaotic Evil Medium Outsider

Bestiary 1, pg. 68 (image from 2e’s Bestiary 1, pg 77)

Ah, the succubus. The good ol’ honey trap, perhaps the oldest in myth; agents of the Abyss sent to inspire mortals to spiral towards Chaotic Evil deeds to secure pleasures beyond anything they can feel normally, luring them into the embrace of sin to perpetuate the demon’s hold on the universe. There are perhaps few other demons who’ve inspired as many mortals to throw their morals aside in the pursuit of petty pleasures and flimsy promises. Whereas most demons are concerned only with momentary amusement and few long-term plans, succubi are all about long-term plans, and any momentary amusement they draw from their lurid acts with mortals is out of knowing their actions are all for the eventual benefit of the Abyss and the dissolution of mortal civilization.

... okay, there’s probably more than a little personal enjoyment in there for them, too, and not just physical pleasure. It’s a sport for these demons! Succubi see corruption as a competition and tend to fixate on “hard to get” types; pushing mortals who’re on the edge of Evil is okay, but pushing them from Good and all the way into Evil is satisfying. It’s the act of driving someone once good to commit hideous evils and despicable depravities that really sparks joy in these fiends, and the sensation is nearly incomparable for them. Fittingly enough, nearly their entire kit revolves around causing this to happen, one way or another.

Their most dangerous weapon in this regard isn’t any of their spell-likes, special abilities, or any attacks they have: it’s their +27 to Bluff, so titanically high that basically no level-appropriate adventurers will be able to pierce their lies without some kind of magic, and even level 10+ parties can be fooled by a basic succubus with no class levels. Without offering so much as a kiss or caress, a succubus’ monstrous Bluff can see them wearing NPCs or even players around their fingers, and this is before they put their at-will Charm Monster to work. yes, Charm Monster, meaning it works on everything (like nosy familiars and animal companions who could reveal what they are), and its DC 22 save gives it a good chance to stick against everyone and everything in the party that isn’t immune to the charm condition, so even if you can surpass their Bluff, it won’t matter.

If you think it’s not entirely fair, you’re right! And it just keeps getting worse: Succubi have Suggestion at will as pure social overkill to cover for what few mistakes they make or to get inquisitive mages and Paladins off their backs... and it caps out with the fiends’ Dominate Person 1/day when they need to cheat at the Subtle Manipulation game. Able to take any Humanoid shape, speak any language, and even read minds to better sculpt their bluffs, it’s unlikely they’ll ever need to use Dominate... but it’s always a nasty surprise for any party that’s finally gotten them to shed their disguises and pushed them to fight, especially if it turns out their frontliner got Dominated minutes ago.

Succubi aren’t made for combat, having only a pair of claws that would struggle to kill even a Commoner in a single round, and though their at-will Vampiric Touch gives them deceptive staying power, a wise succubus will never, ever have to enter combat in the first place... and, frustratingly, have both Ethereal Jaunt and Greater Teleport to escape if they’re overwhelmed. They’re far more dangerous without initiative ever rolling, and many tales can be told of unlucky parties who made the mistake of trusting one of these disguised fiends and being picked apart by them before they ever revealed they were a demon. After all, victims are only a single flirty kiss away from being sapped by the demon’s Energy Drain, instilling two negative levels on the unfortunate sap... and each show of affection carries a subtle Suggestion to make the victim keep kissing the demon even as it drinks their life from them. Even if they survive and break away, they’re now considerably weakened and far more vulnerable to the demon’s words and spells.

You can read more about them here.

[pokerninja2]

Tonight's breakdown will be covering two characters at once! I was originally going to do just Daisy, and then I realized I didn't really have anything to say about her as far as references or inspirations go. So, I decided to group her with Rosalina, and get the rest of the Mario princesses (that I've done) out of the way! Keep in mind Rosalina's gonna have more about her though.

So to start with Daisy, her outfit is the same as Peach, being a skin-tight suit allowing for a lot more flexibility than a poofy dress would. While Peach has a heart pattern on her suit though, Daisy has an odd white pattern on her legs. Daisy fans might recognize this as the pattern her dress used to have in the classic games, and they'd be right! I thought it would be a nice touch and help set her apart from Peach design-wise. As far as other references go, her Flower Power attack was directly based on her star swing in Mario Super Sluggers, only instead of walling opponents out with a garden of flowers, she traps them inside one!

Overall, I'm pretty happy with Daisy. I mentioned when I talked about Peach that I was pretty nervous about drawing the Mario girls back in the day, and I think Daisy fared the best here. I like her jumping to spike the ball, really fits with her competitive edge. I think the expression she's making looks great too.

Now for Rosalina, who I have a lot more to say about. I made her for Mar10 day last year, so I wanted to make her inclusion special. What I ended up doing was pairing her up with a cream-colored Luma - the first one she met and sent her to space in the first place! I thought that would be a really cute touch.

Also means she gets to have a Luma play beside her like in Mario Kart Wii! I have had clinical depression ever since that was removed in MK7. Bring Luma Back You Cowards!!!!

Unlike Daisy, Rosalina's outfit is pretty different from Peach. The top is similar, but she has a flowing dress at the bottom with white leggings. I wanted to match how Rosalina often has a slightly different outfit to Peach and Daisy in games like Mario Golf and Mario Tennis. To that end, I think the design I gave her works well!

And then there's Rosalina's attacks. Black Hole is obviously based on the black holes Mario could get sucked in in the Galaxy games, although the art makes it look less menacing. She's probably holding back their true power so they don't actually disintegrate the competitors. And finally her Super Spike, which is based on the ending in Galaxy 1 where the Comet Observatory rockets Mario to the center of the universe! It's just as strong and powerful, so you can imagine how fast the ball would go if a literal comet smashed into it.

I mostly like how Rosalina turned out, although I will say I'm not super satisfied with how I drew her. I feel the posing is a bit too stiff, and I could have made it look more lively. I really should draw her and the other princesses more to get a better feel for them. Maybe sometime soon I'll redraw her, I think I've gotten a lot more confident over the past few years doing art.

And that's generally all I wanted to cover tonight. Got both remaining princesses done at once, although like I said it was really kind of just me talking about Rosalina. Still, I hope this was interesting for fans of both!

[thepercy6andtheradicalsabbatical]

Rome to Napoli -

We woke up, packed moderately frantically and hopped on the metro back to Rome termini. Matt had decided to take the free 3 hour regional train rather than paying a reservation fee for the faster 2 hour train, but we were pleased to find that it was not super crowded and reasonably well air conditioned. Our airbnb hosts offered to pick us up at the train station (“a free service included with the rental”), so we took advantage even though it looked like a pretty short walk. Antonio picked us up at our arranged meeting point, a Mexican restaurant that was about 9 min from the station then drove us for about 4 minutes to the place (we think we could've walked in all on our own in about 15 min 😂). Along the way he excitedly told us about how Napoli had won the Scudetto for the first time since Maradona was on the team and how they had 3 different parties to celebrate. We arrived at the place to find his brother and sister waiting for us and they all excitedly helped check us in and carry our stuff upstairs, at times talking over each other in their eagerness to give us advice. They were very kind, if a little overwhelming, and we definitely appreciated the printed list of their favorite pizza places in Napoli that they showed us. Napoli is the home of both buffalo mozzarella and pizza so Matt planned to have his diet only contain those things for the next 48 hours if at all possible. We then set out to explore and took the metro to what our hosts had recommended as the best nearby park for children, marveling en route at the amount of Napoli colored streamers and championship banners as well as Maradona tribute posters there were everywhere. The area we were staying in definitely felt the most rough around the edges of anywhere we’d stayed so far so we were looking forward to some park time for a change of scenery. On arrival we noted a sign stating many of the things we had planned to do were prohibited in the park (ie soccer/frisbee) so we let the kids play at a tiny playground for a bit, then they spontaneously started doing time trial sprints around a small loop in the path. We moved them along once that got a little too competitive and eventually came to a larger green space with lots of chairs set out in the grass and several other groups playing with soccer balls and other ball games. We decided to allow the kids to play soccer here as well and Henry/Oli again recruited an Italian boy to play with them (no one hassled us for breaking park rules as far as we could tell). The girls played some too and also found what seemed to be an extensive apartment complex of feral cats in a clearing there. Matt then led the family in search of a Maradona mural he saw on google maps. We took a funicular down a big hill into the Spanish quarter to find it. The Spanish quarter definitely was not touristy with big groups of local old men sitting out in tiny squares shooting the breeze, very limited sidewalks to speak of and people cruising around corners on vespas at breakneck speed. We survived our harrowing pilgrimage and found the Maradona mural (though we came to find out there were Maradona murals almost everywhere). We then hit up what our hosts had called “the main street of pizza” and went to a place called Matteo’s. It was number 4 on their list but we couldn’t pass up the name. All were satisfied with their meals and we emerged from the restaurant into a downpour. We quickly grabbed dessert and headed home, getting somewhat drenched (again) in the process.