#like another one of my insecurities is about the vibes of the plot and writing and conflictions about how I want them to be

[iamyourdailydoseofbi]

Hey! Idk if you are accepting requests but if so can you make a Aemond Targaryen x Reader basead on "Mastermind" by Taylor Swift? My idea is that Aemond starts to like the Reader and wants to marry them but he feels very insecure and wants the reader to like him too, so he starts plotting and trying to get closer so it feels organic but he actually is planning everything, then by the end he feels guiltycause he feels he tricked them into the marriage but reader always knew ?Thanks!

A GAME I COULDN’T LOSE ( House of the Dragon x Reader )

AUTHOR NOTE! It makes me so happy to know that you requested my writing! I love this idea! He does ( lowkey ) give off this vibe <3

pairing: Aemond Targaryen x Fem! Lannister! Reader 

prompt: Aemond wants to be loved by Reader, but he doesn’t know someone has been pulling strings..

key: h/c = hair color, Corlys = Laena & Laenor’s father, Baela = Daemon & Laena daughter

word count: 2,000+ words

“Once upon a time, the planets and the fates..And all the stars aligned..You and I ended up in the same room, at the same time..”

The first time he had laid eyes on her,  he was ten. He didn’t know much about the h/c girl, just that she was visiting Rhaena and Baela. Offering the young girls support after the loss of their Mother. Right away, he knew that she was special. She had held their hands throughout the ceremony. She whispered comforting words whenever the adult’s turned their eyes away for a split second. She purposefully ignored Aegon whenever he tried to utter a snide comment to her.

She had a glow to her, that made him stare. He should have been paying attention to the funeral. He shouldn’t have been staring, but he just couldn’t find it in himself to look away. Not when he wanted to know more about the h/c girl in black robes. She was absolutely eye-catching⎯and he was sure that if the circumstances were different, he would have made a attempt to talk to her.  

“And the touch of a hand lit the fuse, of a chain reaction of countermoves..To assess the equation of you..Checkmate, I couldn't lose..”

The last time he had seen her, he was ten. His vision was blurred and the pain was unbearable. But, even through all of that he could still see her icy glare. Burning holes into him and his brother. Her hand gripped tightly on Baela’s shoulder, a wet rag in her other hand.  Even though he lost an eye, he felt somewhat better knowing that she was looking at him. Sure, it was out of disgust and anger. But, it was a start. 

Their eyes lock for a second, her glare deepening. A sneer now forming on her pretty face. He was sure that if it was just the two of them, she’d curse him out. And as odd as it was, he wished for it. He wanted to know her name. He wanted her to talk to him⎯even if she was damning him to hell and back. He wanted her. And he would get her one way or another. 

“What  happened?” Corlys questions, staring at his granddaughter in worry. 

“He…” Baela stutters out, her eyes brimming with tears. 

“Allow me to explain, my lord?” Y/N speaks up, rubbing Baela’s shoulder.

“Speak, child.” He nods.

Looking at  Baela for confirmation to continue, the young girl nods her head, the tears in her eyes now starting to fall down her bloody cheeks. The h/c girl swallows the lump in her throat. Rubbing her thumb on her shoulder, Baela grabs at her hand, gripping onto it tightly. The pain of what had happened painted on the young girl's face. 

“Aemond claimed Vhagar, he did it  in security so that they would not get the chance to oppose it.” Y/N explains, “After being confronted, he insulted Luke and Jace, calling them bastards. They defended their honor.” 

“You tell the truth, child?” Corlys asks, looking at her for any deceitfulness. 

“I do, sir. I gain nothing from telling lies.” She whispers, keeping her eyes on him. 

Aemond watches as Corlys stares her down, a serious look on his face. Those kinds of accusations were as serious as they come. If they found to be lies, she’d be punished or worse⎯killed. Turning her eyes from Corlys to him, Corlys’s eyes follow her, a death glare on his face. 

“Do not let them punish the boys for his mistake.” She begs, placing her hand on Corlys’s arm. 

“What if I told you none of it was accidental? And the first night that you saw me, nothing was gonna stop me..I laid the groundwork and then, just like clockwork..The dominoes cascaded in a line..”

The next time he saw her, he was eighteen, and it may not have been so accidental. He never thought that he would see the h/c girl ever again. But, when he heard a whisper from the maids of one of the lord’s girls returning after being away for so long. He made sure to be in the area. Watching from a distance, she adorned a simple red dress, a bright smile on her face⎯much different than the last time he saw her. His heart fluttered at the sight. 

Picking up her skirt slightly, she picks up her pace as she walks, approaching a man. Bowing her head at a few people, she sprints at the man, a loud laugh leaving her lips. Spinning her around in a circle, she buries her head into his shoulder, her h/c hair bouncing around. That must have been her father. Pulling away from the hug, he grabs her arm, tugging her away from everyone’s prying eyes. 

“I missed you!” She gushes, “It’s been far too long.” 

“Agreed, far too long. How is your brother? Meria? How is the baby?” He questions, a bright smile on his face. 

“Wonderful! He’s been prancing around preaching about him having a son. Meria had to lock him in their chambers to stop him from embarrassing himself any further.” She explains, “How has the court been? The last time I was here, I was a mere child.” 

“Troubled. But, I am sure things will work out in time.” He nods, patting her arm. 

Nodding her head in understanding, they slow down their pace, now away from the nosy eyes of the people on the dock. Patting her arm gently, a troubled look appears on her face, probably wondering why the court was so troubled. Not that he blamed her. Targaryen politics were⎯how to put it⎯difficult at time? Passing by him, they completely ignore his presence, seemingly in their own little world. 

Stepping out from the shadows, he clears his throat loudly, making sure to get their attention. They both tense up at the sound, pausing mid-step. Slowly looking over their shoulders, their grips tighten on one another. Their faces showing their thoughts, shit. Forcing smiles onto their faces, they bow in respect. 

“Ah, Y/N. You remember Prince Aemond. Don’t you?” Her father pipes in, tensing at the sight of him. 

“I do.” She spits out, nodding.

“My lady.” He smirks, “I’ve seen you’ve grown too. No longer the feisty young girl that I once knew.” 

His eyes lower to her hand, wanting her to extend it. He wanted to place a kiss on the back of her hand, like he was supposed to do. He wanted to be a gentleman. He wanted to show her the respect she deserved. Her eyes flicker down, seemingly catching what he wanted. She clenches her jaw, holding her hand out for him. A giddy feeling blooming in his chest. Carefully grasping her hand, he practically melts in his shoes at the feeling of her hand in his.

“Yes, my time in Winterfell has made me mature.” She forces out, tensing as he places a kiss to her knuckles. 

“I can tell.” He teases, “Will I see you tonight? We are having a feast for my brother’s marriage with Helaena.” 

“You will.” She nods, relaxing as he pulls away. 

“Promise to save me a dance?” He asks, trying desperately to not sound to eager. 

“I think about it.” She muses, “Until then, Prince Aemond.” 

“What if I told you I'm a mastermind? And now you're mine, it was all by design..'Cause I'm a mastermind...”

She did in fact not save him a dance. Instead, she happily took Aegon’s hand. Not before, shooting him a teasing wink over her shoulder. If Aegon wasn’t his brother⎯Correction, if there wasn’t as many people in the hall as there was now, he’d have struck his brother down. Glaring holes into the back of Aegon’s head, he could hear everyone’s giggling, his mother even making a teasing remark.

“Why don’t you ask her for a dance, Aemond?” Alicent questions, a slight giggle to her voice. 

“She took Aegon’s hand.” He deadpans, eyes glued to her. 

“Only because she is teasing you.” Rhaenyra teases, “She’s a Lannister. She’s going to make you work for her hand.” 

“Shush, Rhaenyra! Can you see him turning red?” Alicent teases, the woman bursting into giggles. 

Turning his head to the woman, a snarky remark was on the tip of his tongue, but he held it back. He would let them enjoy this. Tomorrow they’d be sober and back at each other’s throats. Looking back at his brother, he places a kiss on the back of her hand, a smirk on his lips. Muttering something to her, she gently slaps his arm, shaking her head with a laugh. When he got the chance, he’d beat Aegon to a pulp. 

Clenching his jaw at the sight, Aegon holds his hand out for her to take, hopefully to escort her off the dance floor and into his arms. Placing her hand into his, they walk off the floor, heading over to the table. Jumping up at the sight of them, he stands up from his seat, holding a hand out for her to take. But, she does not take it once again. 

“Lady Lannister, wonderful to see you again. Are you enjoying the festivities?” Alicent smiles, a light snicker leaving her lips.

“Indeed, your majesty.” Y/N smiles, “Although, I must say the party is more tame than I am used to. Winterfell’s festivities are less..calm, so to say.” 

Nodding their heads in understanding, she finally turns to him, her lips slightly twitching up into a smile. His heart pounds in his chest. If only he had the ability to freeze time. Holding her hand out for him, he carefully grabs it, afraid that she’d pull away too soon. Pressing a gentle kiss on the back of her hand, she narrows her eyes slightly, like she was trying to read him. Meeting her eyes, she slowly pulls her hand away, turning her attention onto his mother.

“Queen Alicent, will you dance with me?” She questions, “Aegon has grown tired and I much prefer someone new to dance with.”

“You see, all the wisest women had to do it this way..'Cause we were born to be the pawn in every lover's game..”

She holds onto Alicent’s hands, twirling the older woman in a circle. Giggles leaving the older woman’s  lips as they spin around. Perhaps, in another time where war wasn’t a looming threat, things could have been more like this. Happy. Not a care in the world. Slowly coming to a waltz, a mischievous glint appears in Alicent’s eyes, almost like she knew something that no one else knew.

“Your son, Aemond.” Y/N questions, an innocent look on her face. 

“What about him?” Alicent teases, an amused look on her face.

“He doesn’t think⎯” Y/N shakes her head, “Oh, forget about it.”

The amused look on Alicent’s face grows. Now this, she had to hear.

“No, you have gotten my attention. What is it?” Alicent nods, motioning for her to continue. 

“I was going to say. He doesn’t think it was an accident meeting me at the docks, does he?” Y/N questions, innocently.

“What do you mean?” Alicent furrows her brows together. 

Y/N’s face flashes mischievous before being painted in fake innocence. She was a Lannister after all. She always had a trick or two. Tucking a strand of hair away from Alicent’s face, she pulls the woman close to her. Almost like a hug, but not quite. Hiding her face in her hair, Alicent wraps her arms around her, pulling her in close. 

“My mother always said that I should never let fate handle things. That if I want something, I should make it happen.” Y/N whispers, keeping her voice low enough to not be overheard. 

“What are you saying?” Alicent questions, raising a brow. 

“It was not a coincidence that we reunited after all of this time, my Queen. I know of the approaching war. I know sides will be picked.” Y/N explains, her voice low.

“What are you suggesting?”

“Let us marry. A tie between both of our houses will be beneficial.” She smirks, “The Lannister riches? The Lannister allies? And the Targaryen crown? A very powerful duo. One strong enough to win the war.”

[sailoryooons]

Suga's How-To Guide | Interlude One | myg (m)

☾ Pairing: Camboy!Yoongi x f. reader

☾ Summary: Min Yoongi has been a cam boy for a few years now. The work is easy, the money is good, and he has loyal viewers. When he approaches you and asks if you want to be his muse for a ‘how-to’ series, your view on the infamous Yoongi changes.

☾ Word Count: 9,165

☾ Genre: Friends to lovers, pwp

☾ Rating: 18+ Minors are strictly prohibited from engaging and reading this content. It contains explicit content and any minors discovered reading or engaging with this work will be blocked immediately. 

☾ Warnings: Explicit language, light mentions of insecurity from reader, explicit sexual content including unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, oral (m. and f. receiving), ass play (small disclaimer: there's no verbal convo / visible discussion about practicing safe rimming - as with any sexual act there's a risk factor so pls don't take this as end all be all), fingering (asssss), nipple play, a lot of spit and cum and bodily fluids idk fam they fucking, recreational drinking (neither party drunk before sex), use of a color system, slut / sex worker shaming (lightly / implied)

☾ Published: October 7, 2022

☾ A/N: This was supposed to be a drabble series but it has turned into a little more. Like I have said - this does not specifically have a plot but there will be a pinch of problem solving etc in the next chapter. Reminder: this series doesn't have a goal and I'm updating it whenever I feel like it. There aren't scheduled updates for it, they just sort of happen when I'm vibing with it. Anyway, this feels like it took me 500 years to write but my god I haven't really written a chapter of something in almost a month, though I've done some oneshots. It feels really good to finally have a finished product of something, so thank you for being patient with me. Also I actually edited a chapter LOOK AT ME GO. But if you see errors well I'm not perfect lmao

☾ Disclaimer: All members of BTS are faces and name claims for this story. This is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment or representation of real-life people. Any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real-life scenarios.

Masterlist | Ask | Series Masterlist | Part of Hali’s Happy Agust | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

The door to Seokjin’s apartment opens as you lean on the counter of the kitchen, drinking wine as a group of your friends pick at an exquisite charcuterie board. Taehyung swings his legs back and forth where he sits on the counter in a heated debate with Namjoon over books while Hoseok and Seokjin both move around one another in the kitchen, preparing dinner.

“Will you go see if that’s Yoongi?” Seokjin asks you over his shoulder. “He’s supposed to be bringing a bunch of wine, he might need help carrying it.”

Pushing yourself off the counter, you nod. “I didn’t know Yoongi was coming.”

“Yoongi always comes,” is Seokjin’s answer, though you’re pretty sure that your best friend didn’t explicitly name Yoongi in the list of people he invited over for dinner.

Monthly dinner at Seokjin’s two-story home has always been a thing. As you wander through the door toward the entryway near the living room, you try to think if Yoongi has ever missed one of the monthly dinner parties.

You’ve never noticed before.

Of course, before there wasn’t a reason for you to notice. Before, you weren’t secretly hooking up with a long-time friend on camera for his viewers. Before, you were confident where you stood with Yoongi: a good, albeit a little distant friend that you’d never really consider doing much one-on-one with, but comfortable enough to pair up in crowds.

Now as you see him hanging a rain-slicked jacket, shaking droplets of water out of his damp, ink-black hair, you have no idea what to do. Before was easy. Now is a little bit confusing, especially because you haven’t really spoken much from his little how to give a blowjob segment.

Yoongi looks the same as he always does: t-shirt stretching across a broad slope of shoulders, dark hair curling beneath his ears and resting against milky skin, his onyx eyes fixated on you where you stare at him. All forms of greeting vanish from your brain in a snap.

“Hi,” he offers, eyes dragging up and down your frame. That one look makes your fingers tighten on your wine glass with almost enough pressure to crack it. “Can I bother you for some assistance?”

Yoongi nudges two cardboard box crates full of wine with the toe of his boot. “That’s what Jin sent me for. Holy shit, where do you get all the wine?”

“Friend of a friend owns a winery and they let me pick out two bottles every month. I’m not much of a wine person but they’re great gifts and even better for dinner parties.”

Walking to where he stands in the doorway, you bend at the knee to grab one of the crates by the handle. It’s a hefty weight as you lift it, grunting slightly. “I don’t think we needed a dozen bottles of wine tonight.”

“They’re not just for Jin.” Yoongi smirks as you turn away, stomach flipping. “I brought some for you.”

“Me?” He hums in agreement as you both head toward the kitchen. “For what?”

“Helping me, obviously.”

“Oh. I see.”

“And you said you liked red sparkling wine. I happen to have a few.”

Noise from the kitchen drowns out any response you can think of. With your bottom lip tucked between your teeth, you haul the crate up onto the counter, careful not to knock over the glass of wine next to Chaeyoung’s hand. Yoongi sets his next to you and surprises you by not moving away.

Yoongi starts pulling bottles out and assigning them to friends around the room. Taehyung takes his with greedy hands, eyes flashing as he reads the label and settles back against the counter.

When Yoongi doesn’t touch the second crate, Taehyung notices, pouting. “What about those?”

“Not for you,” Yoongi grunts, focused on pulling the cork from one of the red bottles he’s selected. Hair presses against his neck and temples where it’s still damp. Suddenly, you have the urge to reach out and brush the strands from his skin, but you don’t. “I’m sorry, was a vintage French wine not enough for you?”

Taehyung cradles the bottle to his chest and you have the answer.

Conversation settles around you. Yoongi takes your now-empty glass of wine as he asks Seokjin questions about work, filling the glass with a fizzy red. You watch him curiously. He doesn’t look at you as sets your glass down, corking the bottle.

The wine is sweet and bubbly against your tongue, with a hint of depth and a little bit of cherry. You immediately like it, wrapping both hands around the glass and nursing it like a cup of tea as you exist between the multiple conversations in the room.

In all, your group dinners usually waver between ten and eleven people. Currently, you’re eight strong with conversations ping-ponging across the room and glasses being slid across the countertop in a fashion that would rival Manhattan’s subway systems.

When you had arrived earlier to help Seokjin set up for the gathering, you’d come with shaky hands, breath held, and winced every time he began to ask you something. But Seokjin never asked you the question, which led you to believe your best friend doesn’t know you’ve been hooking up with Yoongi for his cams.

Taehyung’s arrival had been another test. The younger had been your close friend for about as long as Seokjin, and is the only member of your group who has hooked up with Yoongi both on and off camera. There’s no love lost there – they were friends during and remained friends after, completely uninterested in the other romantically.

Thankfully, Taehyung never asked you about Yoongi. He was all smiles with an already-opened wine bottle, purple-stained teeth, and a little smudge of wine on the corner of his mouth.

It is a well-known fact that if anyone is going to be a walking callout and accountability police for your group of friends, it’s Taehyung. And yet he doesn’t even look suspicious when Yoongi leans over the counter to reach for a folded piece of prosciutto, placing his hand delicately on the back of your shoulder for balance.

Yoongi’s touch is only there for a moment and yet you come alive underneath your shirt. Your heart races as you take a few gulps of wine in an attempt to steady your nerves. The room feels hotter and you shift back and forth on your feet, heat creeping into every part of you.

If he notices, Yoongi says nothing. He pops the piece of meat between rose-red lips and frowns at something Namjoon is saying.

Studying his side profile is devastating. Even from a side view, he is exquisite, the soft slope of his nose the perfect compliment to round cheeks, a plush mouth and cat eyes.

Yoongi catches you staring. You clear your throat and look upward at the light fixtures, sipping your glass of sparkling wine to look busy. He leans his elbow on the counter, facing you completely and you know you’ve caught his attention.

Shit.

A direct conversation outside of whatever you’ve been doing with Yoongi on your weekends is exactly what you want to avoid. You’re unsure how to talk to him, unsure if you’re friends or if he’s doing what you guys are doing with other people – he is well within his right to do so and you know that.

But lately, thoughts of Yoongi have been haunting your every waking thought. The way his rough hands brushed over your supple thighs and gripped them tight when he went down on you, or the greedy way he liked to suck your tongue into his mouth just after you’ve come on his tongue or the way he gets breathy just from kissing the expanse of your neck.

The list of things you think about with Min Yoongi is never-ending and they don’t go away. On more than one occasion when your phone has gone off, your heart leaped at the thought that maybe it was him wanting to do another feature. But since the blowjob, you hadn’t really heard from him.

That’s okay. You’re friends, but you aren’t the chatty kind of friends. At least, you weren’t before. Now you have no idea what you are, and the thought of having to navigate it right there in the kitchen, surrounded by other friends makes you put your glass of wine down and excuse yourself to the bathroom.

Heart hammering, you follow the steps to Seokjin’s guest bathroom blindly. The way isn’t hard to find – you’ve walked this place a million times.

With the door shut behind you, your nerves unwind a fraction. Turning a faucet, you splash some cool water on your neck. It smells like eucalyptus and mint thanks to the plugged-in scent that doubles as a nightlight. You’ve never been happier to have helped Seokjin pick them out, closing your eyes and letting the smell help you relax.

Getting so worked up over Yoongi feels ridiculous. The rush of the water past your shaking fingers relaxes you and the nervousness you felt at Yoongi’s easy touch peters out.

Being around Yoongi and doubting yourself is hard. You don’t know how to stop thinking about the one thing that has been haunting you more and more, especially when he’s in the same room as you.

You want more.

It feels like a poison, increasing in severity as you acknowledge that your interest in Yoongi has shifted from sexual curiosity to… something else. Something that makes your breath catch when he murmurs baby against sweaty, sticky skin. Something that makes you shake when he puts the weight of his hips on yours as he swallows you whole, consuming you until there’s nothing left but want.

Want want want want.

You always want him and you have no idea what to do with it.

A knock on the door startles you. You stare at the door, hands dripping over the sink filling and draining with water.

“You okay?” your stomach flips when the voice you suspected comes through the door, low and soft.

“Yeah.”

“You sick?”

“No.”

Too shaken to lie, you turn off the faucet and wipe your hands on a towel before opening the door. Yoongi is standing in the dim hallway, eyes shadowed by the lack of light. He smells like his cologne and a hint of mint.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” you offer quickly. His brows pull together and you flick the light off in the bathroom to signal you’re done. “Strong wine.”

“You’ve been weird since I got here. Do you want me to leave?” Yoongi doesn’t move. Surprise fills you as you look up at him. “I apologize if I made you uncomfortable or if friendship isn’t something you’re interested in anymore.”

“No!” You wince at how loud your voice is.

Thinking better of it, you flick the light of the bathroom back on and pull him inside. His hand is warm and rough in yours and you immediately don’t want to let go after he closes the door with his other hand, but you do.

“No,” you murmur and pause. Yoongi is close, the shared space is smaller now that he’s filling it with you. He leans against the tiled wall, crossing his arms over his chest. His biceps strain against his shirt sleeves and you fight off a shudder. “I just… I’m sorry, you make me a little nervous.”

He hums. “You’ve been in a relationship for a while, is it safe to assume you haven’t really hooked up with a friend casually?” You nod. He offers a soft smile. It’s not as cocky and self-assured as his smirks are. “You can just be yourself. I really like you that way.”

Your eyes flit up to him. “It’s hard.”

“Why? Am I making you uncomfortable?”

“No! No. It’s…” You blow out air, looking up at the ceiling to take the pressure off of you. His gaze is intense. Yoongi still looks unperturbed. It feels like everything comes easily to him. “I just like spending time with you and it’s a little confusing where we stand.”

Realization settles on Yoongi’s features when you peak at him. He takes a moment, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth to contemplate your words. Fidgeting with the hem of your shirt, you decide you’ve said the wrong thing and you’re about to leave when Yoongi says, “Come home with me after dinner.”

“What?”

He smiles. “Come home with me after dinner.”

“I…”

“You don’t have to. But I’d like you to. Off camera.”

Your heart flutters and you stare at him, mouth open slightly. “Off?” You clarify. “Off camera?”

“Just us.”

“Really?”

His laugh is deep, brushing against parts of you that make your toes curl. He reaches for you, fingers gripping the bottom of your shirt and giving you a sharp yank. A gasp escapes you as you crash into his chest, hands pressed against the firmness of him as he looks down the slope of his nose at you, lips twitching.

Yoongi is beautiful, but up close you can’t focus on anything else but the way his eyes glitter, or the way the wine stains his lips the perfect shade of red or the way he has the barest hint of freckles across his cheekbones.

The way he looks at you says thousands of things and you don’t know what any of them are, but you want to. You want again.

“Yeah.” His words are barely audible. “Really.”

Without warning, Yoongi closes the space between you, pressing your lips together in a soft kiss. Before you can enjoy the sweet taste of wine and the warmth of him against you, his mouth is gone, leaving you flustered and hungry for more.

Yoongi laughs. “Don’t pout. Later. Come on, I was supposed to see if you’re sick. Dinner is ready.”

Dinner is easier after your conversation with Yoongi. Between Seokjin and Yoongi, you’re more involved in the conversation than you were earlier. As the chatter dies down after dinner and everyone enjoys their wine, you feel Yoongi’s arm press against your back as he rests it against the back of your chair.

The room is warm as you lean back, sliding your eyes to look at Yoongi. He’s not looking at you, completely wrapped up in a conversation with Chaeyoung. His arm is looped casually, skin against the back of your shirt warm through the fabric. Heat creeps up your neck into your face and you bite down a smile as you turn back to Seokjin.

If Seokjin notices anything, he doesn’t say it. Taehyung, however, definitely notices.

Taehyung’s sharp gaze is laser-focused on you, capturing your attention beyond Seokjin. His eyes meet yours and flicker to Yoongi’s hand where it rests against you before coming back up to meet your eyes. Your mouth feels dry for a split second before Taehyung grins and wags his eyebrows at you. He throws a wink your way before turning away.

A quiet, slow breath of relief escapes you. Taehyung knows something is different but doesn’t care. That is at least one less hurdle to overcome, though you know he’ll needle you about it later.

That is if he doesn’t do any digging around on Yoongi’s cam profile.

When dinner is over and there are buzzed, soft goodbyes happening at the door, you find yourself next to Yoongi who claps Seokjin on the shoulder, informing him that Yoongi will drive you home. You’re not drunk, but you hold the giant carton of wine Yoongi has dedicated to you while you kiss Seokjin on the cheek and say your goodbyes.

Taehyung presses a kiss to your cheek, slips toward your ear, and murmurs, “You’ll have to fill me in.”

You bite your lip but nod, feeling nervous as you shuffle out of the apartment with Yoongi at your back.

It’s cooler outside, the air a relief against too-warm skin. Yoongi takes the carton from you, heaving it far easier than you were as he walks down the stairs easily. Rain-scented air greets you in the parking lot, the pavement still damp. You jump around puddles, navigating to his nondescript, black car.

Yoongi opens the door with a cheeky grin. “For you.”

“Thanks,” you answer, rolling your eyes. His grin spreads when he shuts the door and rounds the vehicle to place your wine in the back and slip into the front seat.

Inside the car is meticulously clean and smells faintly of cologne and leather. Music plays softly in the background, almost imperceptible over the hum of the engine and the buzz of the tires on the highway as he drives toward his apartment.

The city is made up of stars spilled on a black canvas, winking in the night as he drives with one hand firmly on the wheel. The other slips to your thigh, giving you a squeeze. The gesture tugs at your heart and your fingers shake with a touch of excitement as you look over at him.

“How was your week?” he asks, slipping into a simple conversation.

This feels easy. You tentatively let your hand rest on top of his against your thigh. When his thumb brushes over your jeans you feel hot. You know there are goosebumps under the material, popping up every time his thumb strokes back and forth.

Though it feels wrong to compare Yoongi to your ex-boyfriend, you can’t help it. You don’t remember the last time you felt an intimate hold on your thigh or hand while driving. You don’t remember fielding questions about your favorite movie – Spirited Away – and why.

Yoongi and your ex are very different. Maybe he was different at the beginning – it was college and it’s hard to remember. Yoongi was always different though, a comforting and quiet presence in plenty of your memories.

Now Yoongi presses against your mind like glass, leaving fingerprints everywhere he touches. You don’t mind, especially when he grips your hand tight after helping you out of the car, leading you up to his apartment.

Linked hands swinging in the cool night, bottles of wine clinking softly and the squeeze of Yoongi’s fingers around yours before he lets your hand go to open his door is something you could get used to.

The thought is terrifying. There is no routine here. Nothing familiar except the smell of his candles long put out, and the dark softness of a familiar apartment. But you’ve never been here when there is no camera set up in his room. You’ve never been here without the bright halo of a ring light.

Yoongi turns on a lamp, leaving most of his home in mood lighting. He gestures to a bottle of wine and you nod, sliding onto a stool at his island countertop. He moves around his apartment silently, feet scuffing on the title as he slides a bottle out from your gifted crate to pop the cork. You grin as he pours you a modest glass.

It’s different from the wine you tried before – it’s on the drier side, but there are still notes of chocolate and heady fruit. The bubbles tickle your tongue as Yoongi pours himself a glass, coming around the counter toward you.

Genuine surprise sparks through you when Yoongi doesn’t take the seat next to you. Rather, he walks behind you wrapping an arm around your waist as he hugs you to his chest, slotting his chin against your shoulder while he sets his hand and wineglass on the counter next to yours.

Heart hammering, you turn your head to the side slightly to look at him. You can only see an up-close visual of the side of his face, but he’s stunning nonetheless. He has to be able to feel the way your heart slams against your ribcage as he squeezes you slightly, lips turned upward. His heartbeat is a steady rhythm against you, his breathing deep and soothing.

“Hi,” he says softly.

“Hi.”

“Missed having you around.”

“You could have called.”

He shrugs a bit and lifts his wine. You watch as he struggles to sip correctly with his chin on your shoulder, making you giggle a bit. He places the wine back on the counter. “I wasn’t sure if you would want me to without the invitation of helping me out.”

“Really?”

“I mean – we’re friends but we’ve never hung out one-on-one until you started helping me. I didn’t want to push a limit by asking you to come over if that wasn’t what you wanted.”

It’s true – it was the exact same fear you’ve harbored all week. Hearing Yoongi repeat back your own anxiety melts you, the remaining stress leaving as you press your weight back into him, pivoting slightly in your seat so that you’re angled a bit better.

Long lashes blink above starry eyes. His cheeks are a touch pink – cotton candy against tan skin. Berry lips smirk at you, so close you can smell the sweet wine on his breath. You imagine his mouth tastes like dark cherries and a hint of chocolate.

“What do you want?” Yoongi’s words are breathy against your warmed skin. “Just curious. You don’t have to answer. You don’t even have to know. But I get the sense that you want something.”

“I don’t know,” you admit, eyes zeroing in on his. You could fall into those depths and keep falling forever. “I just- I just know that I want. It’s a feeling I can’t get rid of. I don’t know what to do with all of this want.”

“Give it to me,” Yoongi answers. “Give all of it to me.”

Before you can formulate a response, his lips are on yours. He turns you to face him fully, slotting himself between your thighs as his hands grip the sides of your neck. He pulls you in and you feel that want bloom again. He tastes just as you expected, sweet like wine. His kiss is hungry, matching the desire that has been gnawing at you for weeks.

Yoongi licks into your mouth, tongue ravenous as he tastes you. He pulls away for a moment, teeth pulling at your bottom lip as he catches a short breath before melding his mouth to yours again.

His hair is silk between your fingers, slipping easily as you pull him closer and closer and closer. Want pools low in your belly and you squirm in the seat. One of his hands moves toward the base of your throat, fitting his fingers perfectly on either side to give a gentle squeeze.

Both of you part slightly, exchanging breath as you pant, lips an inch apart and glossy. You open your eyes to look at him. His pupils are a little blown, looking at you like he wants to devour him. You would willingly crack yourself open for him and let him have his way with you, the craving for him overriding every anxiety and instinct you have.

“Color?” he asks, breathless. You feel lightheaded, your fingers wrapped firmly in his hair to keep you from floating away. His grip on you is firm but you want more. “I need to know.”

“Green,” you whisper. You tug his hair gently. “Please.”

It’s the only word you can think of. It’s the only word you need.

Yoongi understands. He asks nothing else of you as he reclaims your lips, nose brushing against yours as your tongue tastes the softness of his lips.

Kissing Yoongi always takes you somewhere else. You no longer feel like you’re in his kitchen, pulling and clawing at one another against the marble countertop. You feel like you’re in a place in-between, tangible and yet not quite there.

Floating forward, you let Yoongi pull you from the seat. His hands are on your waist, waltzing you toward his room. You know the steps. There’s no need to open your eyes, navigating the dark space as you slide your hands under the hem of his shirt, desperate to feel the heat of his skin.

Yoongi’s stomach is soft, muscles jumping under your touch. He breaks the kiss, dragging spit-slicked lips across your jaw. He catches your skin between his teeth in soft nibbles, a soft sting followed by a soothing tongue.

Running your hands under his shirt, you flatten your palms. He feels warm and thrumming, full of life. You tilt your head backward, letting him suck and bite and moan into the soft flesh of your throat.

Everything is spinning. You feel unbalanced as he clutches you by the waist. You bow into him, Yoongi pressing you further and further as his teeth trace the bottom of your neck.

It feels like the bubbles from your sparkling wine are trapped in your veins. Yoongi’s hands slide to your ass, kneading you over your jeans. He pulls you in tighter, presses every part of you against him. It feels hungry and desperate, drawing a gasp from your mouth as you crush yourself against him.

A pat on your ass is your only warning as Yoongi bends slightly at the knee. You jump as he hoists you and turns, sitting on the bed with you in his lap. Your hands fly to his shoulders as he gives you the higher ground, your face hovering above his as he casts his head back to look at you, pupils blinking at you like twin moons.

For a moment, you don’t initiate kissing again. With one hand on his shoulder, you use the other to trace the veins in his neck, feeling his pulse throb under your fingers for a brief moment as you drag them upward.

Yoongi is a work of art. He lets you map the canvas of his face with the tips of your fingers. Soft, round cheeks. A strong brow bone. Gentle, rounded nose. Plush, pouted lips. You trace the faint freckles, almost invisible in the darkness of his room. You’re so close you could count his lashes as they flutter closed, a hum escaping him as your fingers brush his bottom lip.

“You’re so beautiful,” you murmur. The accidental admission makes your touch freeze, eyes flying to his to see if there is any rejection there.

Yoongi doesn’t open his eyes when he says, “Why’d you stop? Feels nice. Your touch always feels good.”

Lips twitching into a smile, you continue, finger following the curve of his jaw. Your eyes keep flickering to his mouth, though, and soon you’re diving in for more, pressing your lips to his as you give a tentative rock of your hips, grinding into him.

Yoongi’s reaction is immediate. He hums in delight, the hands resting on your ass giving a generous squeeze. He lets you play with him – fingers teasing the hair at the back of his neck, your mouth exploring the areas you’ve already traced with your fingers, your hips rocking slowly at whatever pace you desire.

Arousal pools in your stomach, low and sinking. You break briefly when he pulls your shirt over your head, a glossy line of spit connecting your mouths for just a second, broken by the shirt.

Every brush of his hands on your skin brings fire. You’ve never known touch like this, never thought you could want something so much. You want everything from him, you want to scream, you want to collapse into him on the bed.

Yoongi’s mouth is ravenous, sucking the swells of your breasts as he pulls your bra off of you. you lean backward, chest pushed toward his mouth, head cast back and eyes closed. Yoongi knows what you want, taking a nipple into his mouth and sucking hard. A moan escapes, his tongue flicking back and forth over your pert bud while his other hand comes up to squeeze your other tit generously.

Every flick of his tongue, pluck of his teeth and his moans vibrating from his lips to your chest sends you spinning. It’s an effort to cling to his shoulders, keeping you sitting in his lap instead of tumbling backward. You feel like if you let go, you wouldn’t even fall – you’d just float upward toward the ceiling, toward heaven.

The world tilts. Yoongi lays backward, careful to keep you balanced against his hips. You gasp, equilibrium thrown and feeling like you’ve crashed into another dimension. You sit up for a moment, dizzy and looking down at Yoongi while you straddle his waist. His hair fans around him, lips swollen and dark from kissing. His chest rises and falls rapidly, eyes half-lidded but pupils blown.

With possessive hands you pull at his shirt, making a sound somewhere between a huff and a whine. He chuckles, his traditional sideways smirk taking over his expression as he leans up, helping you remove his shirt.

In your dreams, you remember what Yoongi’s skin feels like. It pales in comparison to the warmth of him now, firm chest under your adventuring fingertips, his heart jumping as you lean down to teeth at his collarbone.

Under you, Yoongi is a vision. Little curses escape his lips, almost like he can’t stop them. He rolls his hips into yours, seeking friction, drawing out moans from your lips, breath drifting across his skin.

Yoongi is flushed all over and his patience for your seeking mouth is at an end. He rolls the two of you, making you squeal as your back hits the mattress and his weight sinks on top of you. It’s heavy and the air is hot between you, his lips brushing your earlobe as he nips you.

“Color?” his voice is deeper.

“Green.”

For a moment he doesn’t answer. Instead, he sucks gently on your ear, breathing low and soft as he exhales. “Turn over,” he instructs gently. “Jeans off, perfect ass in the air.”

Pulling away from you, Yoongi gives you space to pull at the button on your jeans. He joins your shuffling, tearing at his own jeans. In moments you’re both kicking the material from your ankles, giggling as you lose balance and he catches you by the elbows, placing a kiss on your nose.

“Cute,” you hum.

He grins. “Ass up,” he reminds you.

With an eye roll, you do as he says despite the excitement shooting through you. You’re on your knees shuffling to your elbows when he slaps your ass with a loud crack, making you gasp more from surprise than pain. His hand is quick to rub over the stinging flesh, pressure in his fingers firm as he massages dimpled skin.

“Sorry,” he snickers. “I couldn’t help myself, I should have asked.”

“I liked it.”

He hums and smacks your ass again, much lighter, though. “Noted.” His hand drifts toward the apex of your thighs, thumb pressing firmly over your clothed hole. The pressure is a surprise, making you moan out loud, forehead dropping to his sheets.

“Fucking wet.”

Yoongi is right. You’re soaked, the thin material of your cotton underwear clinging to your folds. The pressure of his thumb gently drifting up and down your pussy is enough to make your eyes roll back, breathing becoming shuddered as he absently plays with you.

His thumb leaves you and your eyes flutter open, already missing the pressure. He distracts you when his hands drift to the elastic waistband and asks, “Color?”

“Green.”

“Mmm. Good.”

Yoongi all but rips the underwear to your knees. He leans forward and bites the apple of your ass lightly, making you laugh as he waits for you to lift one knee at a time to slide the material off.

“Really?”

“Uh-huh,” he asks, pulling his teeth away. The air cools your skin where you can feel his spit. “I said I like your ass.”

“So you try to eat it?”

He pauses long enough that you frown, turning to look over your shoulder at him.

It’s a vulnerable position, your knees spread apart with your aching pussy on display for him. You squirm slightly, seeing him look at you with an expression between inquisitive and hungry. “Has anyone?”

“Has anyone what?”

You shiver in the cold room, unable to sit still as the cool air hits you between the legs. Your eyes flutter lightly and you desperately want him to close the distance between any part of him and your heat.

“Eaten your ass?” That makes you open your eyes. You shake your head no and he grins, shuffling close to you. His hands go back to your round cheeks, rubbing his palms over chilled skin to warm them again. “Can I? We don’t have to. I definitely want to eat this pussy.” A hand sips between your legs, fingers deftly brushing up your wet slit. “Wanna play with your ass too.”

“Are you…” the words drift off as you lick your lips.

No one has done that before. It isn’t that you’re afraid of someone’s mouth being there or afraid you won’t like it. It’s just different and no one has offered it before and it never occurred to you to ask. 

But it’s Yoongi asking now, and your curiosity is piqued.

Yoongi must sense your nervousness. He squeezes you. “We don’t have to, forget I-“

“I want to,” you cut him off. You chew your bottom lip. “I think. I don’t know what it feels like.”

He smiles. “I like it. We can always stop if you’re not enjoying it. If it’s not good, tell me.” His pointer finger presses to your clit, making you sigh as pleasure shoots down your spine at the pressure. “First, this.”

Yoongi vanishes from your vision. You feel the bed dip where he leans, his hands skating from your ass to your thighs, rubbing up and down. Your eyes close and you sink your face into his bed as he places chaste kisses on the back of your thighs.

Fear of imperfection does not exist here. None of your previous concerns cross your mind with Yoongi – not anymore. Especially when he digs his fingers into the meat of your thighs and strokes his tongue slowly up your slit.

“Fuuuuuuck,” you whine, unable to help yourself as pleasure shivers through you. It feels different from this angle as Yoongi slowly laps at your cunt with his tongue, mouth giving your pussy a gentle suck. “Yoongi- nnn.”

His hum vibrates through you as he leans in to gently pull at your clit with his lips. “My favorite fucking pussy.”

Even if you could respond, you don’t. Yoongi shoves his face in your cunt, tongue licking slowly and greedily. You can feel yourself dripping, fingers knotting in his sheets as he mouths at you.

The feeling that twists in your stomach is so tight that you feel like you sink further and further into his mattress, turning boneless. Yoongi uses his fingers to spread you wide open for him, alternating between fucking his tongue thoroughly into your clenching hole and giving broad, slow stripes up your entire pussy.

If there is one thing you can tell Yoongi enjoys, it’s eating you out. He doesn’t hide his enjoyment, his mouth messy and loud as he sucks at you. His hands do all the work holding you up as he continues to push his face into you.

Unyielding hands skim up to your cheeks. Yoongi spreads you a bit, pressing you into the bed further with the weight of his grip. With another long lick from clit to hole, Yoongi licks past your dripping entrance to tentatively flick at your perineum.

The feeling is different, making you hold your breath. His tongue continues with a few tentative licks and one of his hands leaves your ass, drifting to your clit. Your legs tremble as he applies gentle pressure, circling your clit with his fingers as he flicks his tongue against that new spot again.

It feels… nice.

A sigh leaves you as Yoongi drags his tongue upward, pressing it flat against your tight hole. You sigh as he curiously flicks over the unfamiliar spot. Each new pass of his tongue makes you shiver. You feel a little high, your cotton-candy-mind fuzzy and drifting.

Everything nerve feels like an exposed wire, sparking and jumping as Yoongi presses the flat of his tongue against your rim. The pressure feels good, something you didn’t expect. You relax further into the mattress, melted and mindless.

Noises fall out of your mouth. You're unable to stop them, lips parted and breathing sharply. Sometimes your breaths form his name, a curse, or something in between. The orgasm building in your stomach is white hot, your insides squeezing tightly as you begin to dig your fists into the bed, trying to release the tension.

“Color?” Yoongi asks. You mumble something incoherent, eyes rolling backward under closed lids. He presses a finger harder to your clit. “Color, baby. Try to tell me.”

“Green.”

You think it comes out something like grnn or gren – it's hard to tell with your words muffled in his dark sheets and the heavy feeling of your tongue in your mouth.

“All fucked out?” his words are deep as he kisses your ass cheek. “Feels good?”

“Mhmm.”

“You gonna be able to take my cock?”

You nod desperately. You want to feel the weighted slide of Yoong inside you, want to feel the pleasure as he sinks in. But you haven’t even cum from his efforts with his mouth yet and you feel dangerously close to passing out from delight.

But you want him. So you search for some clarity and come to, clearing your throat and getting up to your elbow as you gently push your ass backward him. “Yes,” you say. “Please.”

“Mmm.” Yoongi dips his head down and gives a quick prod with his tongue. You drop your forehead to the bed, panting heavily and arms shaking. He pulls away briefly before spitting, making your muscles spasm as you gasp. “Cute little hole.”

You hear the grin in his voice. “Fuck - Yoongi.”

Carefully, Yoongi’s fingers go back to your clit, circling faster. Your stomach lurches. Warmth spreads over your skin. You squeeze your eyes shut, shoving your ass backward to meet his hungry mouth. It feels like you’re going to explode, your pleasure so tightly wound that you know you’ll snap at any second.

Everything clenches all at once. You gasp and hold your breath. Your orgasm rushes out of you, pussy pulsing against Yoongi’s mouth as he hungrily sucks and licks at you. You can feel his hands rubbing up and down your thighs, the press of his mouth firm and unrelenting as you tremble against the sheets.

Catching your breath is hard. Yoongi pulls away from you as your legs give out on the bed. His palms are steady, kneading the flesh of your ass as he lets you claw your way back to the world of the living. Everything feels thick and heavy in your head as you roll over, breathless.

Yoongi kisses your knees and thighs, hands never pulling away from you. You look at him and you twitch through another shiver. The air is cold against your body but you feel over-warmed by your orgasm and the heat of his gaze as he stares at you.

Surging forward, you reach for the hem of his boxers, hardened cock straining under the dark fabric. Yoongi watches with lips curved upward as you sit up and shuffle to him, hands hanging loosely at his side. You feel the burn of his gaze as you brush your fingers up his shaft, feeling him through the material of his briefs.

Yoongi hisses, making you glance up at him as you use a finger to delicately trace the outline of his straining cock. His eyes are closed, head tilted toward the ceiling in prayer. You grin, gripping him firmly through the fabric, the curve of him heavy and warm in your hand.

“Mm don’t tease,” he mumbles. “I didn’t tease you.”

“This is fun, though.” You dip your hands under the elastic waistband and grip Yoongi’s cock firmly. His hips twitch and he opens and closes his fists, his breath coming out shaky. “You’re pretty.”

Carefully, Yoongi helps you take his briefs off before letting you mouth at him. He hums in response but otherwise remains to kneeling with his eyes closed, letting you do what you want.

Watching Yoongi’s minute expressions and body language as you pull him out in full is fascinating. His lips and brows twitch when you take his cock in your palm, stroking to the tip to gather the precum there. You work your hand up and down firmly, lubricating his cock with gentle twists.

Little sounds escape Yoongi’s mouth, making your grin spread. Everything he does pulls you in. His hips thrust lightly into your hand, his mouth is parted, neck shining with a light layer of sweat. It’s addicting, the way he loses himself at your touch, completely at ease and safe in your hands.

Surging forward, you take the crown of his dick into your mouth, swirling your tongue around. He curses loudly, a hand shooting to your head. His fingers are firm against your scalp, not pushing but clinging to you desperately as you low the spit in your mouth to dribble down the sides of his cock.

The salty taste on your tongue spurs you further, sliding down a little further each time you bob your head. It’s slick and messy but you don’t care, using a combination of your tongue and hollowed cheeks to slurp at Yoongi generously. You hum around him as you pull away from him with an audible pop, a string of spit chasing you.

Yoongi, though appreciative, has had enough. He surges toward you, pulling you gently by the hair to lay you back as he crawls on top of you, lips going to your neck and jaw. He presses himself between your hips. Your thighs spread wider to accommodate him, hips sticky with sweat and leaking arousal where your skin presses flush together.

For a few seconds, Yoongi’s mouth leaves you to reach for a drawer. You don’t know what spurs you still is movement, hand wrapping around his forearm firmly. He glances down to see you, your eyes round and hopeful.

“No condom?” he asks, arching a brow.

“We exchanged test results,” you murmur. It’s true – you had done that before hooking up with him in the first place. “And I’m on birth control. I mean – we don’t – sorry. I realize that’s not-“

He interrupts your thoughts with a soft kiss. “I want whatever you want.”

“I just…” his breath is hot against your face, his nose brushing against yours. “I realize that you may have other partners, I didn’t mean to assume and-“

“I don’t.” You stare at him, heart beating wildly. “It’s just been you since we started. I’d tell you if I was sleeping with more than just you.”

“Oh.”

You feel his smile more than you see it, his lips pressing against your cheek. “So you want me to fuck you raw, huh?”

You laugh at the way he says it, shoving at him slightly. He doesn’t budge, nipping your chin. “Just wanna feel you.”

“Fuck. Okay.” His hands scrape up your sides, cupping your tits as he licks and sucks the flesh around them. “How do you want it, hmmm?”

Instead of answering him, you roll, pressing your ass toward him. Yoongi kisses up your back, hands coming to either side of you as he cages you in with his chest.

“Mmm.”

Yoongi gets to his knees as you shift to all fours, looking over your shoulder at him as he shuffles behind you. His chest is pink and red, splotchy with warmth, and flushed from effort. He strokes his proud cock a few times, your eyes zeroing in on the motion. His tip is flushed scarlet from your teasing and slick with spit and precum.

His other hand comes to dip between your legs, teasing your clenching hole lightly. You whine and shimmy your hips, pressing toward him. He tsks at you but grins before pulling you open a little more. He has your knees spread far apart as he grips the base of his heavy cock to prod your entrance.

“Fuck.” You go down to your forearms, ass higher than your head. He makes a sound between a laugh and a moan as he slips his cockhead further, running it up and down your pussy to gather your slick. You’re a dripping mess and you don’t care. “Yoongi.”

“Yeah?” He asks as he slides his cock past your entrance again. You clench around noting, frustration building. “Want it, hmmm?”

“Yes.”

“Fuck, you’ll get it.”

Even though he warns you, Yoongi catches you off guard as he glides his cock forward, making it a point to slide in this time. Your breath gets stuck in your lungs as you breathe in sharply, the pressure of him sliding in on one thrust sending you spinning.

Yoongi’s cock is thick, filling every part of you as he sinks to the hilt. You feel his hips pressed against you, still for a moment as your pussy flutters around him. Your hands twist in the sheets, trying to ground you as you breathe through pleasure with the barest hint of pain.

“You okay?” his voice is deep and rumbling, pulling you back to reality.

You nodded your head, forehead pressed to the bed. “Feels so fucking full.”

Yoongi let’s out a breathy sound as he pulls back, the slide of him glorious against your walls before he thrusts in again. He glides without resistance, each slow pull sparking in the softness of you. Moans drip from your tongue.

Every roll of Yoongi’s hips is measured, setting a deep, gentle-stroked pace. It feels so good, like the tip of his cock is in the deepest parts of you.

When you start to thrust your ass back to meet him, Yoongi grunts, picking up the pace in earnest, fucking into you with force. You feel the weight he puts behind it, his cock brushing your spot each time and fuck you swear his cock is hitting the depth of your stomach, so deep you’re delirious.

“Oh god,” you gasp, trying to get a single, steady breath in. It’s hard, breathing past the electricity humming along each vein and the pleasure curling its fingers in your stomach. “Fuck – holy shit – fuck.”

“Pussy feels so fucking good,” Yoongi growls. He’s fucking you harder now, the slap of his hips against your ass audible. “You’re so wet, just fucking drooling on my cock.”

“Deep,” you manage to moan out, the only word that rolls around your rapidly emptying mind.

Yoongi changes the angle, hiking a foot up so that he’s almost lunging over you. His fingers claw into your hips, pulling you backward to spear you on his cock over and over and over. It feels so goddamn good that you should have known you would be a goner for him.

And then he introduces a thumb pressed firmly to your ass, the pressure on the nerves there enough to make you fall forward. Your breath gets caught in his sheets as Yoongi’s thumb circles your tight rim, not slipping in but playing with it enough to send your eyes back in your head.

You’re unsure if you’re even participating as you skyrocket toward another orgasm. You can’t say anything, can’t think anything – you’re helpless and whining as you suddenly go taught like a bowstring, pussy clenching around his cock as you come.

Yoongi is vocal, grunting as you squeeze him. He fucks you even harder, elevating your high. A squeal escapes you as you shake from overstimulation, the pleasure blinding you momentarily and making you go numb.

Everything flips as Yoongi pulls out and rolls you. It’s not graceful, but your tangled limbs follow his hands and movements as he spreads you out on his bed, breathing hard. His hair sticks to his forehead, slick cock bobbing against his stomach as he stares down at you. In return, you blink back up at him. You’re on the border of something like subspace, the pleasure sending you into a dark, fuzzy corner of your mind.

“Color?” he asks, hands soft on your spread thighs.

“Green.” You lace one of your hands with his, squeezing. Hair sticks to the back of your neck and the sheets beneath you smell like sweat and cum but you don’t care. “Green.”

“Can you give me one more? Wanna see your face when you lose it.”

You nod and reach for him. He seems confused but leans down, letting you brush sweaty hair from his face. His eyes close at the soft touch, letting you press the pads of your fingers into damp skin as you trace the shape of his features again.

“Wanna see you too,” you admit softly.

That earns a smile from Yoongi, the kind where he ducks his head shyly and it’s all gums and crinkled eyes. You love when he smiles like that. It makes your heart flutter, interrupted only when he thrusts back into you without warning.

You gasp and he chuckles. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” you manage to grit out. You arch your back as Yoongi pauses to lean back, grabbing your right leg, lifting it and shifting your position so that both of your legs are pressed together, draped over his shoulder as he leans into you. “Holy shit.”

“Yeah,” he pants, setting a hard and fast pace as he fucks into you. “I know.”

The angle is divine. Your thighs pressed together make your pussy feel tighter. You swear you feel every ridge and vein of his cock as Yoongi fucks into you hard. His thrusts are shallower and he bites his bottom lip, focusing on the way his cock disappears inside your heat.

In this position, you can watch him. His stomach flexes with every movement, muscles jumping and twitching. His hips are glossy with sweat and cum, but he doesn’t care. One hand grips your half, fingers dimpling in your skin while the other holds your hip.

One of your hands shoots to the hand at your hip, gripping his wrist as your eyes roll back into your head. You feel your orgasm again, rapidly approaching though not as strong as the second one. You can’t remember anyone ever making you cum over and over like this, but Yoongi is relentless, chasing after it.

“Touch your clit for me baby.” He’s busy holding your legs and hip to do the work for you. He kisses your calf, gentle in comparison to the way he’s throwing all of his weight into his thrusts. “I’m so fucking close.”

Following his instructions makes you squirm. You deftly circle your throbbing clit with your fingers, the stimulation making you shudder and whine. He laughs and encourages you to keep going.

The sensitivity is replaced with mind-numbing pleasure. You can feel your third release on the horizon, your breath hitching, and your moans coming out as high-pitched staccatos.

“Shit,” he curses, head ducked down. “Fucking squeezing me.”

Something about the way he’s fighting to stay composed sends you over the edge. You almost don’t feel yourself come, everything going white-hot and tingling at once. Yoongi come with you, losing his rhythm, curses laced with your name.

Time seems not to exist in the space between you. Yoongi pulls out – you only know because you suddenly feel empty. Cum drips down your entrance to the bed, the sticky feel of it slightly uncomfortable as you lay with your head to the side, unsure how to move or do anything else.

There are no thoughts. There’s just contentment and trying to catch your breath. Everything feels hot all over, like there is a fire burning under your skin. Yoongi collapses next to you, a human furnace. You don’t move away from him though, a hand automatically seeking any part of him to keep the connection between your body.

You find his collarbone, splaying your hand across his skin. His heart thuds underneath your touch. He lays a hand on top of yours, palms sticky with bodily fluids.

As your breathing slows, you don’t know how long you lay there. It feels messy but you’re tired, and just as you begin to teeter into the depth of sleep, Yoongi stirs and nudges you. A whine escapes you, but you let him pull you out of the bed, careful hands guiding you through dim light to shower.

Yoongi doesn’t turn the lights on in the bathroom. A single salt lamp casts a soft glow, more than enough for you to safely step into the glass shower. The spray of hot water uncoils already loose muscles. Your knees buckle a bit when he leaves you, but Yoongi makes sure that you’re standing safely before he steps out briefly and vanishes into the bedroom.

Steam fills the room. You touch sore places of your skin, feel the indents left by teeth and fingers. There’s an ache between your legs – battered pussy begging for sleep, you think.

When Yoongi returns, there is a soft exchange of touches. Yoongi presses soap into your skin, you scratching shampoo into his hair, a brush of swollen lips.

Somehow it feels more intimate than the sex.

After the shower, Yoongi wordlessly gives you clothes of his. You raise a brow but he waves it off, sitting on his bed and peeling back the covers. It’s a sure sign that he wants you to sleep there, and you’re so spent that you don’t think you could fight even if you wanted to.

The shirt and pants combo smell like him and you grin, sliding into the space he’s made on his bed for you. It occurs to you that he changed the sheets and grabbed a new blanket, the ruined ones balled up in a corner near the hamper.

For a moment, you feel hesitation. Yoongi’s bed for sleeping is foreign territory to you, and you’re unsure how he sleeps: does he cuddle, or does he not like to be touched, what side does he lay on what-

Yoongi reaches for you and pulls you toward him, stopping your stream of thoughts. He tucks you into his side as he lays on his back, one hand behind his head and the other wrapped around you tightly.

Sleeping curled into Yoongi’s side is the best sleep you get in months. But when you wake up the next morning, flinching at the bright screen of your phone to check what time it is, everything is long forgotten when you see a single text from your ex.

So what? You’re a pornstar now? Disgusting.

You lock the phone.

Sit in Yoongi’s room as he sleeps deeply behind you for a moment.

And then you get up and leave without a second thought.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

[prouvaireafterdark]

hi! i absolutely LOVE all of your writing- especially how you write smut. it’s filthy nasty but also very tender and loving and true to the characters. as someone who’s getting into fanfic writing, do you have any tips on writing good smut? how do you create that balance? thanks xx

Aww, that's so sweet, thank you! And yeah totally!

My first piece of advice is the advice I gave to myself the first time I ever wrote smut: Go big or go home. That isn't meant to like talk down on people who don't want to write really filthy stuff btw, that's just what helped me get over my anxiety about whether I was writing something "too filthy" for the beautiful degenerates on AO3 bc I'd never written anything like that before and didn't know if I was going "too far." I decided to just throw that line of thinking away and write what I wanted. If people don't want to read explicit fic, they won't. If they click on explicit fic, they probably will enjoy it if it's filthy nasty, so, be free. Write the filth you wanna see in the world.

That brings me to my second tip: Write what you think is hot. There may be moments where you're like "are other people gonna like this?" but I'm telling you, don't worry about what other people will enjoy because everyone enjoys different things and you'll never please everyone, especially if you're writing fetish content. If you enjoy the idea, you'll be motivated to finish it and you'll write a better fic because of it. It might take some workshopping and editing until it's where you want it to be, but if you're reading your work and you like it and think it's hot, other people will too.

Those are my two big tips for getting started. When it comes to creating balance between filth and tenderness, I would say my one big tip I have is to try to focus on what the POV character would be feeling and thinking in the scene. Tab A goes into Slot B is a fine way to begin constructing or plotting out a scene, but it would be a pretty boring thing to read if it just ended there without anything else added in there to give it emotional dimension.

I try to break up mechanical descriptions about positions or movements with descriptions of physical sensations or emotional responses to physical stimuli. I also like to add in a healthy amount of dialogue.

Let's take Armand and Daniel for an example: When Daniel is squirming beneath Armand and begging for a taste of his blood, is he begging with words or with the desperation in his eyes or his hands as they grip at Armand's clothes? How does that make Armand feel? Physically, does the movement of his body against his feel good? Can he feel how hard Daniel is where he's rubbing up against him? Emotionally, does Daniel's submission and begging make him feel powerful? Or is he overcome with devotion, like he'll give Daniel anything he wants just to make him stay?

Taking the time to ask and answer these types of questions can reveal a lot about the characters and also give you a lot of fodder for description in a scene. It can also help you set the tone you're going for. Maybe this fic is just pure smut, PWP, with a bit of a hate sex vibe, so Armand is really getting off on the power play and denial. Or, maybe it's a more angsty smut fic where you want to explore how Armand is dominant, but also deeply insecure and feeds Daniel's blood addiction to keep him coming back. It all really depends on the vibe of the fic and what character traits you want to explore through the smut.

Another good tip is to try to engage all five senses when possible. Ex: What does Daniel feel like beneath him? (ex: warm, soft, hot, hard) What does he smell like? (ex: cigarettes, sweat, the expensive cologne Armand bought him) What does he taste like? (ex: martinis, smoke, blood that's welling up from a split lip from one of Armand's fangs) What does he sound like? (ex: desperate, like a whore, his voice high and thready with need) How does he look, spread out beneath him? (ex: flushed cheeks, messy curls, pink lips open and gasping). You can have a lot of fun with all five senses.

I could go on, but I'll leave you with this last bit of general writing advice: If you get stuck, don't be afraid to write out of order. Who cares if you start at the end? You can always edit it all seamlessly together, and then you haven't wasted hours trying to brute force your way through a scene when you had a different idea for a later part floating around in your head practically begging to be written. You make the rules!

Okay, that's all for now. I hope it helps!

[magpiefngrl]

Fic author self-rec

Rules: Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you’ve written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💙

Thank you for the tag @tenthousandyearsx a few weeks ago! I wanted to wait and get a couple of my WIPs ready and posted before doing it, but I'm now back to full time work so it's unlikely I'll finish those WIPs any time soon. 😢 So, here's 5 old fics of mine that I'm fond of. It's hard to choose a favourite, so I chose rather randomly, whatever popped in my head first tbh.

They're all drarry.

The Unquiet Grave (E, 21,5k, gothic vibes)

Quote: ‘What will happen is this. You’ll drag me to a poncy restaurant one evening soon, and I’ll complain about the number of forks and the size of the portions. Then I’ll drag you to my local and you’ll complain about the wine list and the clientele. This will be a recurring theme. But every time, every single time, we’ll end up in my bed — or yours — and I’ll make you forget your own name.’

My thoughts: I reread this yesterday after years, and I ended up really enjoying it. I particularly liked the dialogue in this read. I'm pretty happy with how this fic turned out. It's got a gothic mood and fits an autumnal mood; I often rec it for Halloween.

Sometimes a man needs (E, 5.5k, Flower Shop)

Quote: Harry knew what a huge mistake the whole thing was, but he’d already fallen for Malfoy, so what harm would a few more nights do? What harm would it do to kiss Malfoy some more and inhale his intoxicating smell? What harm was it that Malfoy spent almost every evening with Harry and whispered things in the dark that he never alluded to in the day? Harry was in love and in pain, but he might as well get what he could while he could.

My thoughts: I love the magical flower shop I created here, the types of flowers I came up with, and, craft-wise, I love Harry's voice. I remember I'd struggled with this fic, starting and deleting, starting and deleting, until I got a handle on Harry's voice and then it flowed in a morning.

The Gift (E, 29,5k, Captive Prince references)

Quote:  Draco’s desires — at least where Potter is concerned — are a tangle, messed up like he is. A war of contradictions: Draco wants to please Potter, and he wants to hurt him. He wants to see Potter in ecstasy, but he can’t allow himself to be the one to do it. So, he’s chosen another way, a way that gives and takes at the same time. ‘You’ve been such a good boy so far,’ Draco tells Potter and watches with pleasure his instant reaction, the blood colouring his face. ‘I think you deserve a treat for being so good. So… obedient. Which is why Adam here will give you a… gift.’

My thoughts: Used to have complicated feelings about this one. I'd hidden it for years and only revealed it a couple of months ago. Draco is a writer here and channels many of my doubts and insecurities. It's not a fic that has a wide appeal, not cute or fluffy at all, but I love my prose here and I had fun with inserting CaPri nods and writing excerpts of a magical CaPri story.

The Boy Who Died (E, 26.8k, Voldemort Wins AU)

Quote: At times he thought he noticed his own lust mirrored in Malfoy’s gaze, like when he cooked and Harry sat on the kitchen table, mouth and fingers sticky with treacle syrup or brown sugar, or when Harry left the shower in his pyjama bottoms, his hair soft like a waterfall down his bare shoulders. Harry had taken to sleeping topless; he couldn’t get used to Malfoy’s fancy pyjamas, and although Malfoy had looked extremely put out the first time, he didn’t object.

My thoughts: I'm just so fond of this one! I thought of the reincarnation plot because of wangxian and I peppered some wangxian Easter eggs in this fic, but I didn't expect to fall in love with this dystopian, Voldemort Wins 'verse. It's a bleak world but somehow this fic has become one of my comfort reads and I've reread it often since posting it.

Through the Looking Glass and What Draco Found There (E, 17.4k, Mirror of Erised alternate dimension)

Quote: Getting to know Harry was to love him: hearing him laugh at Weasley’s jokes, watching him sleep, witnessing his passionate devotion to what was right and the ardor with which he supported his friends. He had butterflies in his stomach just at the sight of him; a sentiment he attempted to hide under a mask of cool detachment, because if anyone found out, Draco would be kicked out of Slytherin for incurable soppiness.

My thoughts: I love the Mirror universe I came up with, and am proud of the treatment of the Shrieking Shack in this fic, which I haven't seen elsewhere. It's one of my works I'm most proud of. I didn't expect it'd be emotional, but I've received a bunch of comments, some of them very recently, saying it made readers cry. oops?

I'm guessing many of you have done the latest round of this author game. So, tagging everyone who hasn't done it and wants to! Would love to see the fics you rec and why xx

[cosmos-dot-semicolon]

⭐⭐⭐

Id love to hear your ideas if you have any you'd like to share! Either from stories you've put down or concepts you have in the spares drawer!

(⭐fanfic writers' commentary)

Hmm… spares you say..?

I wrote a lot of rough drafts for the other stories in my 'Fixing the Dice' collection (uncertain on the name still), but I didn't feel they were up to my standards so I never published them. I think I'd probably change some of their plots if/when I rewrite them, so I feel safe sharing these.

You probably won't see these exact concepts come to light though. sorry.

Thief is planning an escape route with Inventor. The story focuses on showcasing the tensions he has in the main campaign with the other contestants; I picked Inventor as the character for him to bounce off of because she's crafty in a different way, and picks up on the dungeons being rigged the fastest along with him.

I don't think I ever figured out whether Lady Luck was gonna come into it for the main story, but she does show up at the end and point a finger at Inventor to be like 'that's the guy you're trusting. lmao'

From what I remember this was the draft I liked the most. It was pretty tonally solid. I think I ran out of stamina when it came to writing because I was under so much stress at the time. Also I struggled a bit with characterisation between the two, since the dice tend to be a lot shorter on dialogue than Lady Luck and Jester.

I think Witch was supposed to have a live interview with Lady Luck on her own request, which, as you can predict, doesn't go very well against someone much more experienced in entertainment and rooting for your downfall. I think I might've also had another way earlier version of her doing some fighting and magic, but I never wrote that down

I quit that one because I didn't have much to really say in it. Maybe a theme of influencer culture versus the entertainment industry? I suppose, but I don't care about either of those. I had a couple of ideas about a discussion about peoples' beliefs in magic and luck and whatever, but that felt a bit out of hand for a study on Witch's personality, who's like. A instagram user

…maybe I could make that contrast of attitudes work, actually. Try and reproduce the vibe of Eric Andre's 'did Margaret Thatcher effectively use girl power'. It'd probably still be a bastard to work with, tone-wise, but who knows?

I like to write these stories with a pinch of my own insecurities as the driving force, and I didn't really have any regarding fame at that point, so Witch was really hard to brainstorm for.

Warrior… I wanted to have him play off Jester and Lady Luck at the same time. He was kind of hard to think of a 'deal' for since he's the simplest of the four contestants in terms of character, and doesn't really pick up on Lady Luck's subtle-not-subtle evilness. The idea was instead to make this was a hope spot in the series between him and Jester, and have him trust Jester to help them find a way out, which ultimately fails.

I really struggled to find a setting for this. In the draft I wrote, I settled on a game-show-mandated road trip (they get to touch grass for one hour) out of the dungeons in that fancy car on the wheel. But it just didn't really work well tonally at all, and I personally have no experience on awkward car journeying at all, so.

Inventor I'm actually rewriting now. I've been posting snippets of it on my blog, even, since I'm no longer in contact with some of the friends who used to be my beta readers.

I don't want to spoil its new premise, but I will say the tone has changed massively from 'let's watch this nerd run around in a saw trap and solve maths puzzles that imply that the universe and all knowledge in it is fundamentally doomed' to 'Inventor's urge to know about everything in the dungeons and the world' versus 'WHY ARE YOU ASKING HER ABOUT IT'. It's a slight change, but I think it works way better with the ending I'm planning to use.

It's got a bit of commentary about how the general public reacts badly to maths and you only find respite from that with people who have learnt it sorta deal. I think Lady Luck would be the kind of deity who definitely knows the rules of her domain, given she's the one who designs the puzzles in-universe and is otherwise quite crafty, but obviously doesn't want to tell anyone any of that.

Unless. Well, unless she can get a new minion out of it.

…It's a fun time. I promise c: Now I just need to do research to make sure everything STEM-related I put in there is correct…

Jester was going to fail backstage. A fun reminder of how I was one of the few people who failed that level first try because I didn't realise it was a gimmick fight until half-way through >.>

I struggled with writing the action in this, since that's not usually a focal point of my writing. I felt that it would be useful for building up tension to an anti-climax, and we could have he rest of the story be a sense of failure and being stuck in life, but what actually ended up being written down just felt like a really stilted tonal shift from one bit I felt was obligatory to another I actually felt like doing.

also it played a little to one of my personal headcanons of Jester having a one-sided crush on their boss, with the scraps of recognition they have keeping them going despite the fact they can't leave the dungeons. This was definitely the least canon-compliant thing I put in the series, but I think it's still an interesting concept.

I will be honest. I don't think I would've handled it well. relationship angst doesn't work well with Dicey's mostly lighthearted tone I think. Nowadays I'd rather explore it with the jokey Pride Month DLC my brain cooked up because 'toxic yuri' and 'turbo divorce' are among my favourite words in the English langauge.

…not to get too personal but I think I was kind of putting way too many of my fears into that first draft and using writing it as an unhealthy coping mechanism. so. uhh. yeah after I got called out on that I was a bit embarassed and stopped. I think I'm in a better position nowadays, but as a result of that I don't really have a solid idea of where the tone would go on that story if I wrote it now.

I never really figured out what I wanted to happen to Jester in that fic. One potential ending had them being forced to cohost, like they'd always wanted. Another has the confrontation with their boss just kind of end on an impasse as they refuse to break. I think there was a bit where Lady Luck offers them their own escape at the cost of everyone else, which they did definitely refuse.

A bonus: I think I wrote one story about Warrior helping Jester move into an apartment or something after they got released. It was supposed to be a thing about finally getting to live your life the way you wanted and whatnot. I stopped writing that because I couldn't fucking fit the tone with the fact they were 5 foot tall cubes in my head

[in-ceptions]

the lil guidelines !

below are some 'general requirements' i would need you to be able to understand if we are to roleplay together ! if you are interested in roleplaying with me, please send me a pm. 'rules' are not explicitly set in stone.

THE BASICS.

I'm ur local forgetful lil guy <3 My name is Jesper, I use she/they pronouns, and I'm just a lil dude who enjoys creatively writing. I'm a full time masters student, and work part time, so my activity actively writing could potentially be sporadic come September, though I should mostly be available to chat and plot and the like if that's something u like! 

Unfortunately I also tend to have the constitution of a sickly Victorian child, so my health is another factor to note If I ever don't reply in a timely (before 1 week) fashion, please note it's not personal! Beyond of all this, I'm just a fuckin forgetful fool.

Though most of my ooc literacy will be colloquial and in small caps, I use proper literate grammar in roleplays.

I write in third person, generally multi para, though I've been out of writing practice for a while due to academic responsibilities.

That said, I've always been comfortable and most commonly roleplay multipara literate and occasionally novella, but only when I'm very inspired by a plot and/or character. I tend to match response length either way!

I do not do (oc x love interest) fandom roleplays. I do not double up in replies either, but I'm 100% down with doing multiple rps with the same person if several plots/ocs are mutually interested in!

When it comes to fandoms, I rarely roleplay canon characters. Any I do can be found here (tba), but please note they're massively personal interpretation and with my own head cannons. I am happy to write within canon/established universes though! Characters written in established universes can be found here (tba).

Also I swear a lot. Im sorry <3 if it's a big discomfort let me know and I will try to limit myself !!!

PAIRINGS AND DYNAMICS.

Pairing wise, I am a sucker for a romance but I'm also more than down for platonic relationships - and they don't have to be end up positive. Give me found family and besties and frenemies and straight up antagonistic duos.

All of my ocs are LGBT+. I do not have any heterosexual ocs, but I do have ocs who are interested in ''the opposite gender''. Some of my ocs are asexual, and some of them are non-binary or are flexible with pronouns. Queerness is something deeply embedded within me as a person, and one of the few things I share/transfer to my ocs.

Shipping is inherently based on the vibes I get from both the characters looking to be paired and the vibes from the writer, themselves. Enthusiasm and passion is exciting, and it rubs off! If you're looking forward and excited about characters, I'm going to feed off of that joy, too.

I ADORE plotting and chatting to who I'm roleplaying with. Not only is it a good way to flesh out an rp, but it’s also just fun to walk to someone who's also enthusiastic about writing! I'd love to make collaborative pinterest boards and playlists etc, if that's something you'd be interested in.

TRIGGERS.

Please tell me/direct me to your triggers and limits. Rping is for fun, and fun cannot be had with discomfort. It is never a want nor wish to cause any harm, purposeful or not. Please note if I see you have rules available to read, I will read them. Respect is a key part of writing, and the fundamental foundation to building any sort of relationship, be it casual writing buddy or beyond!

My own triggers are strong, recurring and prevalent themes of suicide, self-harm (in the context of mental unwellness) & eating disorders. explicit mentions of weight insecurities make me uncomfortable.

LIMITS & CONTROVERSIAL TOPICS.

I will not, under any circumstances, roleplay non-consensual nsfw, pe*dophila, or other such things. if you'd like clarification on anything/any topics that i haven't mentioned, please feel free to ask.

Please note that just because I haven't mentioned it here, doesn't mean I am open to roleplaying it. As I'm new here I'm not too versed on peoples' limits and preferences on this site, so I'm covering general bases.

Additionally, to reiterated: generally deplorable things involving minors, s/a between paired ocs and r*pe, in*cest will never be roleplayed/written by me. These are hard limits

Many of my characters have mature and controversial themes in relation to their backstory and characterisation. I will always endeavour to check your own limits first before I propose one of my ocs to write with you, and will be explicit about any potential triggering and mature themes they involve.

Several of my ocs deal with alcoholism/substance abuse, paranoia, homophobia, organised crime, murder, prostitution, cult behaviour/organisations, religious guilt, general mature themes and associated others. If you have any questions or desire any clarification about an oc, feel free to send me a lil msg. again, mutual respect and comfort is massively important to me - I want us both to be in a happy and healthy writing dynamic!

Additionally: please note I do not endorse any of the activities or lifestyles adopted by any of my characters. They are entirely fictional and never to be taken as 'vibes to emulate'.

PREFERENCES.

FACECLAIMS.

I am a writer inspired by other artists around me, and thus it's very common to see me reuse a faceclaim for multiple different ocs. This does not mean these ocs are carbon copies of each other; they simply have the same faceclaim. My most prevalent and used faceclaims are park seonghwa, jung wooyoung, lee jongsuk, byun baekhyun and more recently assad zaman.

I have no preference for opposite faceclaims, I just request that they're age-appropriate for the age of the character you're portraying! The full list of faceclaims I use is here.

The majority of my ocs are 25+. I have few younger ocs, and none under 19. I am far more picky when writing with them, and generally prefer to write those in their twenties and older. This is for realism, as many of my ocs would be bare minimum late twenties to be doing what they do, professionally.

tldr for this section: idgf about who ur faceclaim is. As long as they're not inherently problematic or inappropriate, I don't care what face you put to your lovely (or not) lil people.

FINAL REMARKS.

If you would like to see a writing example of mine, please send me a pm too. If you don't believe we'll match simply tell me so, I won't take it personally :)

To conclude, as it's probably pretty obvious I'm new to this sorta rp scene. I'm an ex-quotev user, and roleplayed for nearly ten years on the site - transferring here is going to take a little getting used to, so please bear with me! And if you have any further questions, please let me know; I will happily answer anything that needs clarification. <3

linked HERE are ocs/wips i am currently desiring to write for.

[writingjourney]

not to be greedy but please god bless us with more long secondo works

i have one or two shorter one shots for him in the works but i'm itching so hard to write a proper multi chapter fic and actually explore more of his character. i'm rotating this man in my brain like a rotisserie chicken 😭

i know IKNBS is not even close to being done but i do want to at least mentally explore plot options for another long fic so that it can simmer and grow in the meantime. right now it's either between a historical/darker fic that's cardinal centric but might include pairings with the other papas too (if i can figure out how), an angsty but hopeful terzo fic (i know, shocking), a proper cardinal fic or a secondo slow-burn.

i would also like to have something fun to write in fragments, something that's less complex but is still ongoing and just way less pressure. i thought about using the friday nights characters once that's done or maybe just some soft Copia.

the issue is that i struggle to find unique/creative ideas i really vibe with. full transparency, i've mostly been writing wholesome/safe things over the past year because my mental health just hasn't been great. i'm worried that it's getting old for you, which won't stop me of course but the insecurity is on my mind anyway. i guess we'll see what happens. i want to have fun but also grow as a writer yk :D ♡

[sailorblossoms-snowbaz]

Here's another “Simon isn't interested in girls” post because when I write one that sparks 3 others, apparently lol 

It’s interesting to look at everything Baz, Agatha and Simon say once you know how the big picture actually looks like, because you know what to filter out and what can take you to Deeper Conclusions (this post can also be used to push the Acespec Simon Agenda). 

Like Baz thinking in CO that Simon leaving his house with Agatha is Simon “going with the only person he has ever wanted.” We filter out the Agatha part because we know he’s dead wrong – in WS Simon explicitly tells you Baz is the only person he has ever wanted, with italics as if to correct any previous assumptions and statements! –  and what we have left is: according to Baz, Simon has never shown any interest in anyone (we could say Baz made the normal assumption that Simon “wanted Agatha” because they were actually dating and all that) (There’s also likely how Simon framed his jealous behavior: his romantic jealousy is centered on Baz and only Baz – it fucks him up that Baz would show romantic interest in someone – but if “leave my gf alone!” is all that’s coming out of his mouth, well. You can see what Baz would think.) 

We can believe it when Baz says Simon hasn’t shown interested in anyone, because he's hypervigilant of any potential interest when it comes to Simon (this also happens the other way around: “it’s normal for girls to check out how hot Baz is” is something Simon notices and says, Baz doesn't show any signs of noticing) (After Simon’s “no vibe-check” observation I would believe Baz simply doesn’t notice/doesn't care about any interest in him lol). Both Agatha and Baz note Pippa liked Simon: Agatha to note she was jealous of her, Baz to comment that Simon never even noticed. We look into this further: Baz was likely only observing Simon’s behavior around girls. Look at that: when it comes to romance/attraction, Baz observed Simon around girls, and thought, “this bitch is not interested” ... but Baz doesn’t actually realize what this could mean, given that he has insecurities regarding Simon “not being gay,” which comes down to Baz being worried that Simon wants girls and not boys, and thus Baz is not desirable enough for Simon (Baz finds himself worrying about Simon not liking sex With A Boy literally after he made Simon come all over his little pants! that’s how deep the insecurity goes!)

To me, this would reinforce that when Baz is being vigilant of potential interest in Simon, and Simon having a potential interest in others... he’s only looking at girls. Going by memory here, but every time Baz is raising an eyebrow at a mild ass pasing comment about someone being cute, it’s always a girl. 

Baz fantasized about Simon, but never actually believed Simon would be into boys. I’d say all of this is why he’s so prickly when Simon is all “I’m not gay” when he asks him to be boyfriends – it pokes at his insecurities. At his perception of Simon. So of course he never once picked up on Simon’s interest in him. I think it’s not just Baz lacking A Vibe Check, it’s also Baz having a part of him that believes that Simon wants girls, even when there are other things directly contradicting that. 

Then there’s also Simon not being normal at all about his attraction. I mean, Simon dating? he’s not actually interested. Not into it. Simon engaging in Stalker behavior, taking out his sword (ha) while screaming “tell me all your evil plots!!!!”?? the fucker is wiped. He’s so attracted he doesn’t know what to do with himself. Poor Baz never stood a chance 

[yujeong]

Tagged by @justanothervariant in this writers' ask game - thank you so, so much🥺

Rules: Go to your published works on AO3 and list the first and last fics you published there, a fic for a fandom/ship you've only written for once, your favourite fic in the fandom/ship with the most works, the fic you wish more people read, the fic you agonised over the most, the fic that sprang fully-formed from your mind with minimal effort, and a work you are proud of—for whatever reason❤️

First fic published on Ao3: My VP retelling fic called Little House on the Hill. I had the immense desire to write their story from my POV and I decided to start posting it last December. I haven't touched it in months unfortunately, due to other projects I'm working on rn but I will get back on it soon.

Last fic published: Shoot me, a fic that was part of the game "Guess The Author" on the kindergarten mafia discord server, in which Vegas has to choose who to kill between Pete and Macau. A fun angsty little concept that has a happy ending :3

Fandom/ship I only wrote once: just a kiss, a PorschePete fic which was a way to scratch the itch of seeing them almost kiss during ep 4. I don't have any other ideas for them, so it'll probably be a one-time thing.

Favorite fic in most popular fandom/ship: VegasPete are my babies and the ship with the most fics on Ao3, which makes me super happy. My favourite fic for them is Dead End, a gift fic that I wrote for the amazing @xxhappy-chickenxx. Post canon Vegas angst, the way I adore it.

Fic I wish more people read: Honestly, all of them, because I'm an insecure bitch who gets an adrenaline rush from hits/kudos and especially comments, but if I had to choose, I'd say (Not) Family, a 500 word fic about Vegas and his relationship with Kinn and Tankhun, because I advocate for more fics in second person POV (it's so much fun writing it and it's so rewarding to read if it's done well enough, more people should try it) and Guilt Trip, another 500 word fic that explores the relationship between Macau and Pete during the hospital era, because MACAU AND PETE ARE PRECIOUS AND THEIR RELATIONSHIP GIVES ME LIFE, OK? (Stay tuned for the extended version of that btw. I know I said it's coming soon like months ago but I mean it this time, hopefully it'll be here by the start of November🤞)

Fic I agonised over: Dead End. That's it, that's the post. No, for real though, VegasPete post canon angst is something I wanted to try for a while but I was always afraid of fucking it up. The feedback I received for the fic made me believe that I did a good job with it though, so I guess it was all worth it in the end.

Fic that popped out fully-formed: This doesn't happen to me haha I don't have fics fully formed besides some basic plot elements and some vibes but I guess the closest it's come to that was Broken Vows - a fic in which Kinn takes revenge against Vegas for Tawan in the pettiest way possible. Idk, I had written the basic structure of it one random day and then polished it a bit and submitted it for the server's GTA. It was very fun to write in general, I'll admit.

Fic I'm proud of: I'll just say all of them because I feel it in my bones. Even Bitter Hearts, Clouded Minds, the second installment of my Heroes and Villains series which I am very mixed about, is a story that came from my heart and slipped through my fingers onto the doc document and then on Ao3 so, I can't say I'm not proud of releasing it into the wild. KinnPorsche The Series gave me my passion for writing back and made me start writing fanfic, something I had never done before so I'll forever be grateful for it. English isn't even my first language so I'm glad I pushed my insecurities aside and gave fanfic writing a try 🥰

I'll tag @wisteria-daydreamer, @therealblessedaffliction and @fleet-off, as well as any other writers who want to join in ✨

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

8, 9, 11, 17 for the writer/artist asks!

8. Do you have any OC family trees?

I do, from several years ago, but I can't remember where I put them. I could recreate them, tho.

9. Favourite OC?

Since I already answered this, I'll pick another favourite, Tom. His insecurity and struggles to unlearn habitual misogyny have captivated me because my boy is TRYING he's DOING HIS BEST at separating from the poor company that influenced him for years. He slips up, but he's still trying his best. Overall he's a very relatable character.

11. Sum up one or more of your wips!

I wouldn't exactly call this a wip because I haven't seriously worked on it for years, only bouncing around my brain a bit, but: Patience, the dear beloved knitting oc. I love her and her story and may even find it in me to write it during nanowrimo this year, if I haven't properly planned out any of the other ones I want to get written.

Patience copes with life by hiding away in a small sandstone cave a lot of the time, halfway up a mountain. She knits a Lot, so much so that she has to sell her pieces just so she can afford to buy enough yarn to knit with. This upsets her, but hey, she copes. She's really quite contented with her life, until one day she hears the rattling of *her* rope-and-stick ladder that *nobody else* uses, and a head pops up above the ledge. Unfortunately, its owner is trying to be friendly. Even more unfortunately, due to a combination of circumstances it is sprung on her completely without notice that this is her new adopted sister, Rhona. Patience does not like this. Patience Does Not Like This. However, she does her best to try and work with her, but Rhona just doesn't vibe very well, really. Time passes and her parents are at the end of their rope and it seems that Rhona will have to go elsewhere, though where they don't know. I completely steal a plot point from Dear Enemy in which Patience saves Rhona from a fire, in the process breaking several bones. While she recuperates, Rhona comes to understand her more and learn how Patience works and vibes and how they ought to interact, better. By the time Patience is well enough to go back to the cave as previously - having to overcome her newfound fear of heights, with Rhona's support - they are good friends and enjoy one another's company. In the final scene, Patience is teaching Rhona how to knit.

17. What are some tropes and character dynamics found in your wips?

The Sudden Realisation, in romance; I do not know how romance develops, or how feelings grow. If I have a POV character, either they're Suddenly Aware, or it's an already established thing. (Examples of the Suddenly Aware include both Tom and Adira - he realising he's not actually interested in another girl romantically, she by seeing a photo of them asleep together and going oh - and the established thing would be Paddy and Lilac.) I love the grumpy one/sunshiney one as a trope, and to some extent that's represented in Vaniah and Anneka's relationship, and certainly with Neil and Faith. (Spoilers!! Faith takes a while to be introduced and that relationship certainly surprises the other characters.) I can't think of any other tropes or dynamics off the top of my head rn, but if anyone wishes to pick them up in my writing and ask specifically about it, I'll answer, lol.

[azrielgreen]

Hey Az I was wondering how you go about decision making when it comes to writing. For example. I get an idea for a fic, then it’s like okay, who should top, who should bottom? Should I start with this scene or that scene, do au or canon? Should he break up with him at this point or after the next scene… Etc. Then I can’t for the life of me decide, and the potential story idea just rots in my drafts. Or I agonize over “the next chapter” of a WIP and feel terrified to make the “wrong decision” in case I wreck the story. Or I’ll start writing a small idea I have in my head as if it should be a quick oneshot/pwp, but then I meander around for a while and by the time the characters start doing what they’re supposed to be doing and are about to get to the sex I’m like, ugh… who even cares anymore.

So it’s like because it’s all up to me and there are technically no right or wrong answers (but answers that will make a story flow better or have more realistic character behaviour etc.) I’m too overwhelmed and do nothing.

Do you please have any tips for just DECIDING? 😅💖

Oh my lovely, OK, this is super common, don't panic. So, from what I'm reading here it sounds like you might be a plotter who isn't actually plotting. Having the idea and the vibe is so great but some people need to plot. They need to write down little notes as they go or write out an outline of what's gonna happen just for like the skeletal structure. I know i talk a lot about just diving in headfirst and that works for me but everyone's style is completely different and some people do really well with varying degrees of pre-writing plot.

Another tip for this is to stop agonising over what you're doing and instead calmly lean into your instincts and just go with the flow. Follow what feels good. Don't ever worry about what people will think. Your creative instincts will naturally tend towards your enjoyment, so if writing something is fun, go with it. You can always edit/sharpen things up later.

Once you have your rough outline and your passion, you'll also need to build up that confidence. Don't agonise or worry or second guess yourself. How to build confidence? Like this.

1) love you work, romanticise your process, be so very kind and indulgent to yourself, hype yourself up and KNOW that no one can tell this story the way you can.

2) know that no matter what you read/see/experience, you can level up and match it, don't let yourself feel insecure or compare to others in a negative way.

3) acknowledge that energy is cyclical and that some days you'll be writing the greatest thing ever and other days you'll be barely able to jot a sentence. Knowing that your energy will ALWAYS come back helps you maintain that good feeling and confidence and a little dash of obsession. This is how you hold onto passion, by acknowledging it waxes and wanes.

Above all else, take a deep breath, congratulate yourself for how far you've come and remember that in a years time, you'll be even better than you ever could have imagined.

Outline, plot, know that you have got this. You're a powerful creator.

Az.

💜💜💜

[peaky-shelby]

still buzzing from the amazing chapters u fed us with!!

can I ask you something? What software do u use to write? Word?

Also, I know its probably easier to find motivation to write bc u are getting so much support (as u should) but honestly how do u get yourself into writing mode? And are productive at it?

Im also a writer and am struggling with finding motivation. And the blank page sometimes is scary even though I know want I want to write. Ughhh I hope u understand!

Anyway, I literally just vibe with you alot! Of course I don't know you but you pass a very lovely vibe through your replies and interactions!

Have a great weekend <3

hiiiii,

first of all as i always say thank you for taking your time to read my stories. Means a lot.

Nooowww about the softwares, yess i use WORD unless I'm writing for my scripts, in which case i use FADE IN, if you wanna look into other writing methods.

I have some tips for writing mode so here we goo:

The most cliche one is have a certain time of day you'll write every day no matter what. Tell yourself that everyday at 6pm, you'll sit and write for 10 minutes. Start writing. Some days you'll only write for 10 minutes because your brain is dry and it's just one of those days. Other days you'll start writing and you're never gonna stop because everything is gonna flow and you'll feel content.

It's best when you have a specific time everyday but If you can't , then whenever you have the time just do that. Sit down, set a 10 minute timer and begin. When the timer goes off, set another 10 minutes and by then chances are you're so into the story and writing you'll keep going.

Music also helps to get your mind working, especially if you have made a playlist that is based on your fic. It distracts you from the real world, gets you inside the world you are creating and motivates you to start writing.

Rereading the previous chapter you've written to get on the spirit also helps. By the time you finish reading you wanna keep going and continue the story.

People motivating you is amazing. But you have to learn to motivate yourself in these situations. That can happen with deadlines. Set deadlines for yourself and if you make it give yourself a present. The goals don't have to be huge. It could be one chapter per week. Or to have finish a 100 pages in two weeks. They can be anything as long as you allow yourself to see progress. I've been in the business of professional screenwriting for a few months now but as I've already said I'm still incredibly insecure when it comes to writing my personal stuff and I'm not following other people's plots. Sometimes my insecurities alone stop me from writing. Setting deadlines and rewarding yourself helps stop those insecurities from growing because you can see there is progress and that motivates you to continue writing.

White pages are the most terrifying thing in the world, trust me I know. And they never get friendlier unless you change your mindset. Some times a blank page will be a monster, other days they are endless possibilities. I like to compare blank pages to space. You can go anywhere, do anything and 50 minutes later you realize you're just floating in darkness. There's only one way out and it is to write. Start writing, even if it's the worst first line, even if it's a line you stolr from somewhere else. Look at your keyboard, face down and say fuck it. Start from any part of the story you want. If you don't want to write a scene now, write the next one.

MOST IMPORTANTLY, write about things you are obsessed with. Don't push yourself to write a story that doesn't make you feel like you are high, screaming, crying, throwing up. Write about what you love. I haven't felt as much excitement as i have for New Romantics in YEARS. I picked a plot that I knew interested me enough to think about it before i go to sleep, a topic that i knew interested me to research and could get me obsessed even.

In conclusion writing is a sneaky hobby. Because a lot of times it takes a lot of an energy and you gotta start from nothing. It's all about setting an environment for yourself that awakens your soul and your heart every time to open up. For me music does that. And sometimes when i don't wanna write i create playlists, edits, aesthetics, mood boards, presentations about my fics. Anything to get me in the story. It's all about creating, if you start you can't stop.

I hope this helps and please don't hesitate to text me or send another anon ask. I'm here to make friends and meet people. I love creating blogs that i can interact with others in a safe environment. That's why you'll never see any toxic shit here. I'm a bit of a crackhead, yelling all the time and freaking out but i promise I'm harmless. 💞

I love you to the moon & back xx

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC Review: Unladylike Lessons in Love by Amita Murray

3/5. Releases 5/16/2023.

For when you're vibing with.... diverse historical fiction, "but she fucked my dad"/did she tho?, heroines who know what they're about.

The daughter of an English earl and his Indian mistress, Lila Marleigh was taken from her home as a child--with her sisters--and sent to be raised by her father's wife (who wasn't, like, THRILLED to do so). Making the best of it to grow into an independent, strong-minded woman, she's on the cusp of diving into a mystery when Ivor Tristram comes onto the scene, accusing Lila of being his father's mistress. Working together to uncover more than one truth, Lila and Ivor are drawn to one another... and quite unable to resist.

So--this is a case of a book being marketed incorrectly, in my opinion. The writing quality is good and there is a lot of interesting work being done here. It is a capital "R" Romance, though? Not so sure.

Quick Takes:

--I wish I was more into this, because I do like the way Amita Murray writes. There are cute things like a character named Tiffany. There's a clear effort made to highlight the diversity in England beyond Lila and her sisters, as well as a solidarity between women of color. The thing is, I think this works better as historical fiction with a mystery a plot and a romantic subplot than a romance.

--I just wasn't super convinced by Ivor and Lila's clashes or what drew them together, and I think that some of that is because the story didn't super prioritize them either. The mystery is a big deal. If you like mysteries with romance, you'll probably like this. I need mysteries to support a strong romance plot, and as such I don't think this book and I could match.

--I will say, I did have questions about the portrayal of one supporting character. I'm not entirely sure if her role in the story landed the way it was supposed to (and I'm trying to be vague for a reason). Generally, I think that if the mystery had been less prominent, character development could have gone further in that sense.

--Lila being a woman in her mid twenties who isn't a fragile, chaste flower and isn't insecure about being unmarried was cool. In general, I liked her a lot. Do I think her hero was bringing as much to the table? Not really. I've read another book with the "she fucked my dad OR DID SHE" plot, and honestly, I don't think we got enough guilty conflict bonerism from Ivor. But then, how could be? He didn't have enough of a POV. I keep saying--a lot lately--most romances really need a good POV split in order for the reader to buy the love story.

The Sex Stuff:

It's good. It's not super descriptive, it's not super vague. Lila isn't a blushing virgin and does assert herself during sex--but when you are dealing with a non-virgin heroine, especially in a historical where that's not as common, why not make it a bit more creative?

Again, this is all well-done in many ways, but it felt like it was trying to be a romance when it really wanted to be something else, and so it didn't quite hit for me. I think it will for other readers, and I do appreciate what Amita Murray is trying to do here.

Thanks to Netgalley and Avon for providing a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[dandywonderous]

🛒👀🤯⛔

🛒 A looooot of hurt/comfort; so many of my fics have at least one scene in an infirmary/medbay/hospital bed of some kind lol. A lot of characters having to open up about their personal insecurities or generally just be vulnerable with each other. A lot of characters getting to see different sides of each other or see each other in new lights, whether romantically or platonically.

I've gotten more than one comment on my h/c fics that they give cozy vibes so I guess that too? I do like doing h/c fics but where everyone is largely calm and in control of the situation, so yeah I guess cozy feels is another one haha.

👀 I answered this in the other ask for something I would like to do for TWST, for something I'm wanting to do for ROTTMNT, I think I know what I want to do for the No Anesthetic square of my Bad Things Happen Bingo, which will involve the Doomed Future (so you can probably guess what it pertains to LMAO).

🤯Fight scenes/action. I don't even necessarily think I'm bad at it (although people can dispute me on that lol), it's just that I don't really enjoy it. Trying to make action scenes work in writing is hard. If you describe every punch or kick it can feel bloated and repetitive, but if you just write it off as "and then the fight happened" it feels a little lazy? So there's a balance to strike there. Giving enough so the reader knows what's happening and who is winning or losing or what the consequences of this are going to be without letting it get boring.

It's kind of a pain! Give me a million heartfelt mushy dialogue scenes any day.

That said for plot development I may need to write some action so que sara sara.

⛔Oh yeah I have a few. Some of them are because I started writing a certain kink or something and was eventually like "you know what maybe I'm not as comfortable with this as I thought I was" LMAO (and I'm not going to go into more detail than that here), but a lot of time I just think something would be fun, start to write it, then decide my idea isn't that fleshed out or I just lose interest in the project.

Just looking through my WIPs, there's an ROTTMNT fic about Leo and Donnie's sibling rivalry going too far in the Lair Games, an FFXV fic where instead of going with the guys on their road trip Prompto stays in Insomnia and ends up accompanying Luna and helping from her side instead (eventual Prompto/Noctis/Luna OT3), and another FFXV fic where... I'm just gonna be real the plot was based entirely on the This Day aria from MLP:FiM (I didn't even watch the show I just REALLY LIKE that song).

I can share the bits and bobs from any of those if people want them but there isn't much.

[reinedeslys-central]

my writing directory

I know, I know, it's very audacious of me to create a writing directory when I'm not one of those stellar writers with a gazillion fics. But! I figured this is a much better way to keep track of any writing posts I make here. That way (since my tumblr fics aren't in linear scene-by-scene progression atm) anyone can just see the other parts of the fic in one spot, and I get to have one spot to know exactly what I've posted!!

scroll past the ** for writing directory.

WRITING STATS:

Fandoms I will prob write for at some point or another:

PJO / Riordanverse

Doom At Your Service

Stranger Things

Naruto

KOTLC (maybe idk)

MDZS/CQL

Love O2O/A Smile Is Beautiful

no i don't do rpf but I could be persuaded to do a cinematic universe fic

Fics currently on the go:

could die without you knowing, though - stranger things, platonic stobin dealing with tommy hagan dying (friendship weirdness), future fic (I'm talking like, they're full-on senior citizens), chrissy and eddie are alive. Tumblr & AO3

small mercies (your hands in my hair) - cisswap wangxian and gang are graduating highschool and it's their last summer in the same city. fireworks and love confessions and family feels. AO3

the currently unnamed obligatory three-days-in-the-infirmary fic - nico-centric, kinda character study, solangelo figuring things out post-BOO, kinda canon non-compliant bc idk the timeline between BOO and the other books, angst, grief, found family, softness. Tumblr only atm (the scenes are NOT in order of chronology lol)

like snakes in the grass - projected to be a JYL-centric time travel fix-it so massive I still haven't finished plotting it out lol. My OG huge fic I wanted to write. Will try posting little scenes. 'wind, peace, power;' on AO3 is supposed to be my practice run at the prologue. I will be rewriting that tho it's not my best work.

oh, haven't you heard? - a MDZS ficlet series starring gossip and rumours that are describing different canon divergences. ex. 1: oh, haven't you heard? NHS ran away to be with his lover in the burial mounds? no, you're crazy. Clearly the YLLZ abducted him. Not posted yet.

Snake In The Garden - meng yao character study.

burning like a glowing star - valgrace senior year, first meeting to kinda-lovers, right person wrong time. Tumblr

Fics that are FINISHED:

as the clouds roll in - pjo/riordanverse minor characters-centric college AU. part one of a three-part story about bianca di angelo taking care of her brother, figuring her life out, and making friends (+ Drew the unintentional major character). Anyone who can pick up on the clues (pretty easy ig) and figure out the setting, etc gets a cookie /j ! based on the vibes of 'On The Ride Home' by KC Katalbas bc I just love that song so much. AO3

********************************************************************

WRITING DIRECTORY

my ao3 which has some stuff on it if anyone wants to see that - it has all the fics that have the AO3 note on them. Should have said that lol

Every scene for the same fic will be listed in the order it's written/posted. If I end up finishing a story I'll reformat and dump the whole thing in plot-order on ao3. Cheers!

PJO / Riordanverse:

the as-of-yet unnamed obligatory three-days-in-the-infirmary fic: scene 0 - prologue-ish scene 1 - the library of social awkwardness or here (or in my heart, 'kidney function is a privilege, not a right') scene 2 - sleeping easy (also a current contender for epilogue or halfway mark in the story)

assorted scenes: good days and bad days (solangelo) too much (grover and percy and insecurities)

on the ride home-verse:

burning like a glowing star: scene 1 - I See Stars scene 2 - I can show you the world

Stranger Things:

could die without you knowing though part 0 - summary first chapter (robin gets the dreaded phone call)

MDZS/CQL:

Anyway, have a nice day y'all. <3

[not-souleaterpost]

The Warring Visions of Gravity Rush

Well I don't have the motivation to concentrate on something more productive, might as well atleast write out my spit-take.

Gravity Rush has bad direction. Fitting about a game where you are falling upwards...

Or better said, it has like five different "directions" that clash. And I don't mean in a way that compliments each other or that leads to something interesting, but more just so that it pulls everything down as gravity tends to do.

But what do I mean by this? Well lets talk about Gravity Rush as the marketing idea, as the ideal you have in your head when you imagine this "totally hidden gem revolutionary experience!"

You might see the crazy gameplay, or the few pieces of promo that had this atmosphere that is hard to describe. Or you saw the main protagonist and had some reservations and thought "well she may be designed to appeal to one's lower insticts, but still she has a weird dress and look, so it probably isn't all just that, right?"

Right - its partly like that. And thats the first part that really clashes and jusy kinda makes one groan while playing - Kat is the most boring animu girl you could imagine, inclusive of all the worst cliches, like literally the overplayed scene of a kinda loser male lead stumbling upon her after a shower and her losing the towel, even a deaf person could here the "Baka!" screeching in the void of the evil eye...

But how much can one cry about the evils of some anime thot and overused tropes? But that isnt the only kinda meh direction - cause they also go for the superhero thing. Yeah, maybe it was a different time when the game released, but in this day I am sorry, somehow superheros are the most lame thing I can imagine. I mean I loved the Raimi Spiderman movies but after that it just allways felt kinda dumb - even with anime I atleast have this connection of watching and finding some stuff interesting as a teen, while superheros just looked childish even back in the day.

Still, thats just personal stuff, and comics are comics, heroes are heroes, where is the problem, right, they are not different directions, I'm just making an arbitrary distinction.

Well maybe, but there are a few more cardinal things that truly show the wrong way the game took. Cause as I said it has this whole ethereal, mysterious vibe - and combined with the previous stuff it just synthesises into some corrosive poison, making my enthusiasm melt as fast as I have to play another wacky dream sequence or see some other hatsune miku haired plot device explain time dillation - it just blends into a stew with no taste or texture.

But that still isnt the whole story - the whole game trys to go in the whimsical direction, like that one french movie "Amile" (with the fake language sounding like French) - with all the all town looking citys and music - but combined with everything else, it just kinda makes the sound feel flat and lifeless, - especially when one doesnt see Kat being this mysterious nonchalant force in this world - well maybe in moments - but that breaks down cause we have to do the whole "insecure teenage girl who wants to find a bf" thing which breaks everything.

But I dunno, maybe Im too harsh, maybe I'm just projecting my own current bad mood on some old ps vita game - in the end I had fun, and the most fun I had... Was when after finishing the game I collected gems after having many movement updated while blasting this:

And this is kinda my point,my synthesis - It isnt impossible to mash things together that seem to fight against each other - one just needs the vission.

(skip to 26:04 for the song, then you'll see what I mean)

Hell, to prove my point - I will even go against my prude persona, and give an example that keeps the fanservice aspects:

What if, to show the otherwordless of Kat, how she is a stranger that changes this mysterious world, she actually doesnt even mind when somebody sees her naked? Is maybe even confused? (Hell, plays with the garden of Eden imagary that went nowhere if the spoilers of the sequel I read were right ((yeah I know it also was Newtons apple cause of Gravity, but things can have double meanings) - maybe have Kat be amused at being called a superhero, being a friend to children so being happy if they are - maybe then the whimsical music would work too - being from the perspective of a desolate town being visited by a elf-like being who brightens their day and solves their problems?

Maybe make Kat show that she understands the cryptic meta stuff (but in a subtle way) - basically keeping the feeling of mystery, making the player wonder, if they themselves understand the person they are literally playing as (I know one usually wants players to connect with the charachter, but I think in this case it would work)

So yeah, I dunno, maybe Im the only person in all of time that sees it this way. Maybe the direction they went is actually the right one-

Nah I cant say that after watching that animation that supposedly connects the first game to the sequel : With all the most boring cliches of "Oh the happy go lucky protagonist that loves food!" and "oh these cute girls sure love touching each other, arent they cute😉, figurine link to your left💲" - and then ending with some nonsense fight against enemys that have the same design philosophy as Vtubers... Yeez louis😂

And then reading how the story basically retcons away the kids who were lost in the past in some DLC and introducing even more Meta peeps like some guy who represents the game being programming, and the evil being electrycite which seems to be faux deep like "wow its a steam world and they put away the dangerous of this technology🤯" - like they have literal airships and jetpacks and the protagonist has gravity powers aint nothing impressive or dangerous about electricity😂

I dunno, in the end, what I mean is that Gravity Rush is an idea that had potential, that even has fun gameplay and great moments, so its sad when something like that gets dragged down to the levels of those awful on all levels Waifu Rpgs like Xenoblade 2 (yeez louis, even without all the drama, its gameplay looks like waterboarding to me "watch these shitty animations and cluttered ui while grinding and collecting crap for 80 hours!")

Anyways I prolly went on too long and shit on to many things people here maybe like. So in case you are angry:

Yeah...Sorry