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glovehearts · 19 days
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i swear if someone doesn’t force flu meds down auston’s throat and make him rest i will fly back to toronto and yell at him myself
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revelisms · 10 months
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Throwing down a big ramble of Silco and Vander headcanons, because I've had these two on my mind Too Much recently (and just need somewhere to braindump, while I figure out how to write them).
cw: abandonment issues, violent/complicated relationships, repression, dysfunctional family histories.
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While it's likely canon(? side-eyes our TBD S2 flashbacks) that these two knew each other as boys and worked together for a long time, I really like the idea that they were pulled together by chance.
Maybe they worked on complete opposite sides of the Fissures—Silco working the mines, Vander working the fisheries/refineries/metalworks, etc. Carting off raw materials to various industrial crews was part of Silco's weekly work (and how he'd been able to build connections across the working circles of the city; climbed the rungs and twisted the ears of higher leaders, later on)—and Vander's crew was one of them.
Maybe they caught each others' eyes—or hated each other, at first (or Silco had an immediate, heavily-bottled crush). Countless handoffs turned into messy introductions, into Come down to the Drum, Swiftlet—we'll get'ya sorted up!, into them holing up together in the off-hours with other workers in their ratty pubs, realizing how uncannily much they had in common, for all their surface-level opposites.
Vander takes him under his wing; another stray to the litter. (It's a penchant they both have, perhaps, in their own ways.) He's older than him. Stronger, louder, warmer. A middle child in a big family, rife with dysfunction, broiling over with anger. He's someone who knows how to make his voice heard in the mess, and people flock to him, in ways they never did to Silco. They fear and respect him, in turns. He has a reputation—and it weighs heavy as a blade. He's never afraid to flash it, when needed (or just when he needs to send some brazen fools running).
Silco's jealous of it all, naturally—and more than a little admiring. He believes in him. Feels like he can trust him; like Vander would do anything for the two of them, for their cause, their people—just like he would, for them.
Quietly, his admiration bleeds into something else. An obsession, a hunger, a selfish and desperate sort of love. He was always an outcast, a dirty little thing, to his own kin and anyone on the streets. Never had a father, to appraise him. Never had anyone to call his own, who saw him as worthwhile; who picked him up from the sludge and kept him on his feet: made him feel like he could be feared and respected, too. He's been surviving since he was old enough to haul a cart of coal, and his youth was stripped from him. Always an ancient thing in a weak little body, gnawing at the seams for blood.
I think Vander was deep-seated in denial. An angry, bitter, violent man, with a deceptive charisma casing it all. Their relationship was inherently destructive (and with a flavor of Fight Club repression): they fought with fists as much as words. Sometimes, it skirted the lines, got too close—roughhousing bleeding towards something Silco craved, that Vander feared: that they nearly had, tumbled against walls with fists at their necks and their breath tangled.
And maybe, once or twice (or countless), they slipped over those lines; got too drunk to remember. Convenient thing, that, for Vander to sit in his denial; but Silco never forgot, never played it off. He ached, and he resented. Vander called him a brother in private, and a partner in public, and Silco simmered at it—A brother? Is that all I am, to you? All you see us as?—and, eventually, accepted it; that it was more important to have him, in whatever ways he could, than to not have him, at all.
I read him as having a bone-deep fear of abandonment, as equally as Jinx does: terrified of being left behind, discarded, being seen as unworthy, etc.—largely from growing up in a broken household with an absent father, but also just from being the runt, his whole life; ignored and spat on by his peers, by the stronger ones, the faster ones, the smarter ones. There's rage under that, festered for a lifetime. There's also an intrinsic sliver of inadequacy.
We don't know anything about his home life, before—but there's something there, in the nature of Henry's character in Detachment, that I can't not tie to Jinx: perhaps a guilt he's battled with his whole life, from having an ill weakling of a mother he never knew what to do with, who died too young, hating her life and all an undesired childbirth had reduced her to.
Cue both of these into how he latched onto Vander, and why his betrayal shattered him to a shell—and also why he saw something in Powder: an opportunity to nurture the part of himself he gleaned in her, but also a chance to absolve that guilt from his mother, an innate need to try again, and why her sledgehammering into his schemes brought the humanity back into the monster he'd harnessed in himself.
I think Silco was always a deeply guarded, manipulative, quiet, and wrathful man—and that Vander saw him, empowered something in him, that made him feel worthy, not soiled. That they brought out the worst in each other, in the guise of familial connection, and hid their own fears under the surface (Silco, his affections and desire; Vander, the guilt of emboldening something monstrous in Silco that he despised, that he hated himself for taking pride in).
They were unstoppable together—but destined for a bloody end. A perfect foil for all the ways love can spiral into something destructive.
And, in the aftermath of it all, we have Vi—Vander's manifestation of those regrets: another little thing, adoring in his shadow, that he emboldened in his image while equally discouraging it every step of the way, and that he wallowed in his shame over; and we have Jinx—Silco's own manifestation: another image of his fractured, misguided understanding of what makes family real (e.g., I see the monster in you, and you see the monster in me, and that is still worth something, for all others may be repulsed by it).
He refuses to abandon her, even though he is given every opportunity, by himself and by others; refuses to abandon her like he was abandoned, like he himself abandoned his mother, even for all Jinx lashes out at him, looks for lies in everything he does. He is always, in his own ways, clinging to her—not wanting to lose her, to lose someone who sees him, again; and who he sees, in turn.
(And it's what Vi is striving for, as well—trying to absolve her own guilt of abandoning Powder, and clinging to memory of what they had, not wanting to lose her sister again—and it's something she will rage at Silco for, and go head-to-head with him on, constantly.)
TL;DR—Silco and Vander are a destructive unrequited tragedy, and Vi and Jinx will carry the imprints of that, in everything they do: broken mirrors of their fathers, and their fathers broken mirrors of each other.
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d1sheclectic · 23 days
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only good part of the “That Was Then, This Is Now” film adaptation was when that guy called Byron a queer while looking like this???
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Nepeta: :33 < girls love me beclaws i am cute and pawtistic
Nepeta: :33 < girls find me endearing beclaws i cant figure out social cues so theres always something off about me
Nepeta: :33 < girls are cattracted to my bizarre creature sounds i occasionally make
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chaos-in-one · 10 months
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Figured out how to make a homophobe loose their shit in 5 seconds flat
Just tell them "if you feel you can choose what genders you're attracted to and want to be with, you're probably bi (or something else similar)" and watch em explode at the mere implication that... feeling you can choose to be attracted to a different gender is not a straight feeling
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sweetest-honeybee · 10 months
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Bro the Rainbow Factory Wally voice impressionists gotta stop ಠ_ಠ
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Beverly: Well, I got pregnant that night.
Jean-Luc:
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paradoxolotl · 7 months
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time-for-a-lullaby · 8 months
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Guys i thought you would get a kick out of this
Hubby lullaby knows that I’ve written smut in the past and he knows the book I’m writing will have smut
This man reads this part of my book—
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And was like “oh my, things were starting to get a little steamy”
Y’all
I think if he actually reads smut, he’ll combust lmao
I don’t think he can handle it 😂😂
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smute · 3 months
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tumper recommending my very own mutuals to me like a fishmonger rummaging through my freezer after following me home from the farmers market where he'd promised me a really great deal on salmon
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trashqueen3 · 10 months
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Vergil: does whatever he can to obtain power so he can beat his brother and become stronger, only to get his ass kicked and ends up a slave for many years.
Always Vergil: separates his human and demonic sides to be stronger, only to again having his ass kicked and his human side convince him that it was a stupid idea and to become whole again.
Still Vergil: Has at least one (1) sexual encounter with a woman, ends up a deadbeat father unknowingly and only finds out years later while having his ass kicked by his twenty-something son.
Look I'm not saying that Vergil isn't a deep character or a tragic one, I'm just saying that you can have both tragedy and comedy in a character and by God did they managed to pull it off with him.
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caffeiiine · 5 months
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atsulucy liker!! i’m shaking rapidly you by the shoulders they mean so much to me
AAAAH SHAKES YOU BACK SO HARD
they are my absolute everything
atsushi is dense as hell even when lucy drops the most OVIOUS hinyts
watched them is like watching one of those highschool romance movies that are so bad you love them
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i have Trauma and i'm very lonely and my previous way to deal w/ it was to seek attention (even though I wasn't even good at doing that n just came off as weirdly aggro) bc I wanted rly badly to be seen n feel worth smth but perhaps unhealthily I have found that I actually feel better when I stop trying and just find ways to be happy on my own. I thought I was a heart player bc I think abt identity a lot but I hate that aspect sm so I'm choosing to be void. classpect me
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albatris · 6 months
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shoutout 2 nat. awkward schizotypal king. sees some guard get their throat slit and they're just bleeding out and dying all over the place and can't breathe or speak and he (panicking) is just like "whoa holy shit are you ok"
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thxnks4themrms · 11 days
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Dude everyone knows if I have kids imma teach em how to cook regardless of their gender or age
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finalgirl-horatio · 1 year
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sooo funny to me when metalheads are homophobic. like. rammstein literally wrote a song about gay sex
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