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scribblesofagoonerr · 2 days

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under pressure | katie mccabe x teen reader x caitlin foord

thank you to the anon that requested this one. it's been fun to write it!

i think i'm gonna plan a part 2 of this maybe, depending on what reaction i get from this one...

pairings: katie mccabe x teen reader x caitlin foord

summary: there's a lot of pressure that comes with being the next big thing in women's football sometimes

warning: talks of a eating disorder and angst

It sometimes felt like you had the world at your feet. You were well aware of the word on the street that you were the next big thing in women’s football. The headlines were quick to label you as a future star, comparing you to legends like Marta or Sam Kerr, but of course being the youngest to sign a professional contract sometimes came with a certain level of expectations, and that was something that nobody could really prepare you for the weight that would follow.

Living alongside Katie McCabe and Caitlin Foord felt like a dream in itself like it would for any football-crazy teenager and you were no different, you moved in with them after your own parents couldn’t travel to England with you.

Caitlin and Katie were quick to become more than just teammates or mentors, they became family.

It should’ve been perfect– It mostly was.

At least until the pressure started to become too much for you, the media scrutinised everything about you: your every move, every game, every slip-up. There felt like there was never any room for mistakes and it started to take its toll on you.

The expectations suffocated you and you started to believe the medias’ words, not only the media but the pressure of fans as well, you felt like you were weighed down by an anker of harsh criticism.

Maybe if you were smaller– lighter, you could be faster. You could be better.

It only started small, barely noticeable in fact, just skipping meals and convincing yourself that you were just too busy. The comments on how lean you looked pushed you further, but it didn’t take long for the innocent excuses to morph into something darker.

The hunger pains were a lot easier to bear than the suffocating pressure, but you should have realised that it would be harder to hide, and before long, it wasn’t just you who had noticed the toll it was taking on you.

“You seem a lot quieter today kid,” Caitlin was the first to pick up on your bitter mood as you made your way out of the London Colney and headed in the direction of where Katie had parked her car earlier on when you all arrived for training, “What’s going on?”

“Nothing, I’m all good,” You gave her a weak smile and kept your shoulders slouched as you opened the car door to climb in.

Are you sure, kiddo?” Katie noted the exhausted look on your face as she opened the car door and climbed in, “Cait’s right, you don’t seem like yourself today.”

“I’m fine Katie,” You all but growled in response and slumped down in the backseat of the car, “I’ve already told you I’m fine, so just leave it, will you?” You hadn’t meant to be rude but you really do hate all the persistent questions being fired at you.

You hated being the centre of attention, despite what the media said about you.

It didn’t take long for you to begin feeling the weight of guilt, “Sorry, didn’t mean to snap like that.”

“It’s okay kiddo,” Katie replied, glancing in the rearview mirror and giving you a reassuring smile, “How about when we get home, we order pizza. My treat?” She offered.

Your smile faltered at the mention of food. Your stomach was hurting from the hunger, but couldn’t give in to the temptations, “Um, it’s okay, I don’t really fancy pizza, thanks,” You respond, biting your bottom lip.

You missed Katie and Caitlin sharing a glance with each other, catching the hesitation in your voice. It was subtle, but they both knew you well enough to notice.

At one point, you used to jump at the chance for pizza nights– especially after a long day of training and now you barely even showed an ounce of interest.

“Okay,” Katie simply nodded and started the ignition of her car up.

The drive back home was quiet, too quiet. The hum of the engine mixed in with the quiet volume of noise in the car filled the silence, but your thoughts were still loud. You couldn’t help but stare out the window, feeling the familiar tightening in your chest.

You hated the fact that they were starting to notice more, it was easier when they didn’t and you could still pretend that things were fine, even if they definitely were not.

You couldn’t ignore the way that your hands trembled slightly from exhaustion or the pounding in your head that had become all too familiar lately.

You just had to pretend for a little while longer.

Back at the house, you immediately make a beeline for your bedroom while muttering something about needing a shower. As soon as you closed the door, you leaned against it and took a deep breath.

The initial feeling of hunger gnawed at you but you try to shove it aside, heading into the bathroom to splash cold water on your face all while ignoring the mirror, knowing you wouldn’t like what you saw.

“Hey kid! We’re gonna watch a film, do you want to come and join us?” Caitlin shouted upstairs to get your attention and you jolted slightly in shock.

“Uh, yeah, I’m coming!” You respond, turning the tap off and dabbing your face with a towel before making your way back into your bedroom, you shove a cosy hoodie on and shove your hair up in a messy bun before you head back downstairs to join the two of them.

“Here she is,” Katie exclaimed, gesturing for you to join them in the living room, “Where just deciding what film to watch, do you have anything you’d like to watch?” She questioned.

“Um, I don’t mind. I’m fine with anything,” You told her, plopping down on the sofa beside them as you listened to the two of them argue about what to watch.

Usually it was pretty comical when that happened, but you didn’t have it in you to laugh this time round.

The tension in the room was thick, and you knew it was only a matter of time before they brought it up again.

After what felt like an eternity, Caitlin broke the silence, “Y/N, we’re worried about you.”

Your stomach dropped and you should have known this was coming, but it still felt like a punch in the gut.

“You’re not eating, you’re not sleeping,” Katie leaned forward, her expression soft but serious, “You don’t seem like yourself, and we know that the pressure is a lot, but you know that you don’t need to carry it all by yourself.”

“I’m fine,” You shook your head, feeling the familiar panic rise in your chest, “I just have a lot going on right now.”

“We get it kid, but starving yourself isn’t the way to handle things,” Caitlins’ tone of voice was gentle but still firm. “There’s better ways to cope.”

You couldn’t help the tears that pricked at your eyes, but you blinked them away and refused to let them fall, “I’m not starving myself,” You whispered, trying to convince yourself more than them, “I just… I need to be better. I’m not good enough.”

“Y/N, you’re more than good enough,” Katie’s heart broke at your words as she scooted closer and placed her hand on your knee, “You’re incredible, and not just because of football but because of who you are, okay. You can’t do this to yourself, you can’t push yourself to the point where you’re hurting, kiddo.”

Your resolve was crumbing, you suddenly felt the weight of everything that you’d been holding in starting to break down, “I just… I don’t want to let anyone down,” You admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.

“Hey, come here,” Caitlin reached over and pulled you into a tight hug, “You’re not letting anyone down, kid. We’re so proud of you– so proud. We just need you to take better care of yourself, and we’re not just talking about football here either. We care about you.”

Burying your face in her shoulder, the tears finally spilled, “I’m scared,” You choked out, “I… I don’t know how to stop.”

Katie soon joined the hug, her arms wrapping around both you and Caitlin, “You don’t have to do it alone,” She paused, “We’re here, we’ll help you, but you need to let us in.”

It felt like for the first time in a long time, you allowed yourself to be vulnerable. To let them see just how scared and overwhelmed you really were, with all the added pressure of things.

It now made you realise that maybe, just maybe, you didn’t have to face it all on your own after all.

You could let them in.

#woso x reader #woso fanfics #arsenal x reader #woso #woso imagine #woso one shot #arsenal women x reader #arsenal wfc x reader #heavy angst #katie mccabe x reader #caitlin foord x reader #scribblesofagoonerr

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megalony · 3 days

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I Trust You

This is my newest Dark! Buck imagine, I hope you will all like this one and thank you @missdreamofendless for going through ideas with me for this one.

Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyje @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra848484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17

@zoeybennett @mrspeacem1nusone @zephyrmonkey @estella-novella @eleventhdoctorsangel @kniselle @senjoritanana @shauna-carsley @dottierose @cfdhouse51 @darkfemme1 @rainechase45 @lolalolsstuff @jupiter1700 @ashdoctor @an-aliens-ghost @lunaroserites @houseoftwistedspirits @callsignwidow @winterreader-nowwriter @reneinii @bellsbomb @western-pyro @itsgigikay @harry-satellite @midsummereve1993 @babyqueen17 @buckyyyismahhlife @sammiejane22

Evan Buckley Masterlist

Summary: After meeting (Y/n) and her baby out on a call, Evan quickly finds himself falling for her and attaching himself to her. She's all he can think about. And she will be his.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A deep sigh rumbled past Evan's lips when he hopped down from the truck. This looked like it was going to take a while.

He squinted up at the building in front of them, trying to think and get a layout of the hospital in his mind to figure out which part of the building was on fire.

Evan had never been to a hospital fire before. He had never known a hospital in this area have a fire or have one that was catastrophic enough to cause a full evacuation like this. The 118 hadn't been here at the beginning of the fire, they seemed to have turned up right in the middle of things like they were the last ones to arrive to a party.

This meant full gear. Evan set about zipping up his overall jacket and found his helmet in one of the compartments. He stuck it on his head, fished around for his gloves and strapped them tight around his wrists. Once on, he found his mask in its dusty orange bag and strapped it around his waist. They didn't know how much smoke they would run into up there and when Bobby gave them all a look, they all nodded.

Evan could feel his shoulders slumping as he helped Hen hand out the oxygen tanks to their team.

Smoke and fire meant all the oxygen would be sucked in to feed the flames. They had to be able to breathe in order to evacuate the patients. The tank weighed heavy on Evan's back right between his shoulders, but it was a weight he was used to and not nearly as heavy as the ones he trained with down at the gym. He just knew that the extra weight and effort was going to make him sweat more profusely in that sauna of a hospital.

Fully suited, Evan clicked his neck into place and stood in line with the rest of the team, waiting patiently for Bobby to confer with the 106 who had gotten here first. They needed to know where they were needed and what they were going to be doing.

"Alright, Chim they need an extra set of hands assessing the ICU patients and getting them transported. Hen, you and me will go up to the third floor, there are a few patients they're struggling to transport with all the equipment."

Both of them nodded and Chimney jogged over to the tent set up outside where they were trying to sort out who was most in need of transportation. Nearby hospitals were taking in anyone they would who needed special monitoring or dialysis or life support.

"Eddie, Buck, there's still people on the second floor in the maternity wing who aren't evacuated so go there and make sure that ward is clear please."

"Copy."

Evan took the lead. He knew where he was going, he had been in the hospital enough times to know where the wards were located and he knew the maternity ward was near the front. He steered towards the left and over to the 106 truck that was conveniently moving their ladder towards the front windows to help get their teams in and patients out.

"Can you get us up to the second floor?" Evan pointed at the ladder and when the guy whose helmet read Taron nodded, he and Eddie climbed up on the top of the truck.

There was no time and no need to clip a harness onto the ladder when they could just run up and get in. The ladder was safe enough and they didn't have time to mess around here.

Evan was glad when he got to the top of the ladder that he didn't have to break the window. It was open on a latch, so all he had to do was wiggle his fingers, undo the latch and shimmy the window up as high as it would go. He briefly took off his helmet so he could shimmy through the window before he plonked it back on his head and looked around.

"Where'd you wanna start?"

"Fire's towards the left part of the building, there should be an exit across at the back. Start left and loop around?" Evan pointed to the door on his left that would lead them into the corridor.

It seemed safest to head nearest the fire and make sure no one was in peril, then they could loop around, clear the floor and get out.

"Sure," Eddie tapped his helmet to make sure it was in place but when they headed out the room, his eyes narrowed and he looked up at his best friend. "You holdin' out on me or something?"

How did Evan know his way around the hospital so well, especially the maternity ward?

"Nothing so exciting. I've got a good memory, from visiting Mads and Jee."

He steered to the left and headed down a long corridor, both of them peering into each room they passed. They had to get everyone out, smoke was already starting to clog up the halls and seep through the vents. They didn't want to be in here long.

When Eddie peered down a corridor on the right, he placed his hand down on Evan's shoulder and pulled him back in that direction.

There were two women and two nurses heading their way, hurrying as fast as they could down the corridor.

"All of you, this way and down the back exit there will be people outside to take you somewhere safe." Eddie waved his hands and guided them towards him, showing them the back stairs which weren't yet consumed by the flames or drastic smoke following them like a shadow.

They found another three mothers, all with their own newborns in their arms, and Eddie turned and guided them back down to the stairs while Evan carried on. They only had a few more rooms to clear and then they could check the neonatal rooms and get out of here.

Just as Evan went to open one of the doors on his right, he took a step back when it was yanked open like a force of nature. He stumbled on his back foot, eyes wide and lips parted.

The girl stood in front of him displayed the same shock that was written across his face. They hadn't expect the other to be there.

She was stunning.

Evan wasn't sure if it was the adrenaline coursing through his system, the smoke he had started to inhale or just the rush of emotions in this situation. But he couldn't tear his eyes away from her.

The way the loose tendrils of hair fell down her face made her look positively angelic. Her doe eyes were wide and round and her pupils took over almost the whole expanse of her eyes. Those plump, parted lips were heart shaped and made Evan want to lean closer and taste them.

Her hands were gripping the door, clinging to it like she was trying to prop herself up and the way she was slightly stooped forward made Evan trail his eyes up and down her frame.

She had already had her baby. A lot of the rooms in this ward were mixed, some women had given birth, others were under observation and some were in labour. He guessed all those in labour had been escorted out first, they would have been priority to be taken to the nearest hospital.

And by the way she was leaning forwards, Evan wondered if she had gone through a C-section.

He noted that she was wearing pyjamas. A thin, light blue top with thin spaghetti straps over her shoulders and matching, baggy pyjama bottoms.

"Come with me, we're evacuating all the wards in this wing. I'll take you outside." He reached his hand out for her elbow and gently tried to coax her forward, but her eyes were rapidly scanning the corridor. "Miss-"

"I- my baby, I have to get her." Both her hands clutched Evan's arm so tightly she had him shaking along with her.

She tried to turn him around and drag him in the opposite direction towards the neonatal unit.

(Y/n) couldn't go and just leave her baby. She was two days old. She had to go and make sure someone had taken her and if not, she had to get her baby and get out. There was no way she could leave the hospital and go outside to safety if she didn't know whether her baby would be there or not. She couldn't leave Rory here in peril.

When she desperately pulled on his arm, Evan moved. He looped his right arm around her back and let her keep hold of his left hand. He tilted his head down, taking note of the nametag strapped around her wrist and he tried to rub his gloved hand up and down her back.

Something about the way she slotted into place in his arms almost made Evan smile. He felt like he'd seen her before, there was something about her that captivated him completely and Evan wanted nothing more than to keep her in his arms and escort her downstairs himself.

"(Y/n)," Her name felt like sugar on his lips and her eyes held his full attention when she stopped struggling and looked up at him. "I need you to go out to safety. You go with my partner, and I'll go make sure no baby isn't still here. Chances are she's already outside waiting for you."

When Evan caught sight of Eddie coming back from the stairwell, he slowly turned (Y/n) around so they were facing the right way.

He had to make sure the ward was clear anyway, and he couldn't allow her to come searching with him when she was a patient and needed to be looked after. If the fire got worse, Evan had a gas mask and an oxygen tank and protective clothing, (Y/n) didn't.

The tight grip she had on his hand made him step closer to her and the desperation in his eyes drew her in. He didn't want to let go of her. He didn't want to hand her over to Eddie, as if she was a friend Evan didn't want to share or part with.

Her voice sounded like a song, serenading him and her words struck his heart and rattled down to his core.

"Please- she- she's all I've got-"

"Hey, I'm going to get her and bring her right back to you, okay? Don't worry, you go wait outside."

When Evan nodded at Eddie, he begrudgingly unravelled his arms from her and let Eddie take her arm instead.

He made sure to note the last name written on her wristband before he disappeared down the corridor to the last place he hadn't evacuated yet. He burst through the doors of the first room, the neonatal room compact with incubators and equipment and heaters and oxygen masks and all the smaller instruments specifically for premature babies.

All had been evacuated. That was good. The most fragile patients had been escorted out of here.

Evan could feel the heat following him like he was a thief in the night and the heat was licking the back of his neck and smothering his jacket. He pushed ahead towards the last room in this ward where the healthy newborns were looked after.

To his surprise, there was one nurse left, one babe in each arm and her head instantly ticked to the cradle behind the door Evan had burst through. "These are the last ones, everyone should be out by now." The nurse sounded relieved but her expression was panicked.

There were no more babies to be evacuated and now that Evan and Eddie had evacuated all the other patients, they were all in the clear.

He nodded and spun around, suddenly glad that the hospital put wristbands on each child as soon as possible. He couldn't imagine not knowing which child was which or leaving with two and getting them mixed up. What a horror that would cause.

When he looked down at the cradle, something surged through his heart. He didn't need to read the wristband on the child's arm that was waving back and forth as they wailed, clearly petrified. He could see the name written on the chart on the side of the cradle.

The last name stuck out first. This was (Y/n)'s baby. This was the little one she had been trying to get to, the one Evan promised to find. And when he looked at her first name, his lips quirked.

Aurora.

Fitting. Such a lovely name for a little girl that reminded Evan of a princess.

His gloved hands shook as he carefully reached down for her and slowly eased her into his chest. He knew his jacket wouldn't be the comfiest, it would be itchy against her soft, tender skin but they didn't have much of a choice right now.

The moment she was in the crook of his elbow, her cries ceased almost immediately. She switched to whimpers and wriggling around and when Evan cooed and rocked her as he turned around, it was like magic.

He tucked her blanket a bit higher so it was draped over her neck and very loosely over her mouth. Just in case the smoke followed them in here.

He whispered a soft "It's okay, I've got you." and held her higher to his chest as he moved towards the window. He knew the layout of this place, this room was facing the chaos outside. He could get the truck to move the ladder over to them and get them out quicker. He didn't want to risk going back down the stairs when the fire was still spreading.

It didn't take long to open the window, wave his hand and wait for the truck to tilt the ladder a few degrees to the left to reach them.

"Here's our ride." He held his free hand out to the nurse and took one of the newborns so she could climb over the legs and carefully stand on the ladder. Once she had both back in her arms, she started her descent and Evan cast his eyes down to Aurora in his arms.

He couldn't look away from her as he swung his legs over the window frame and climbed onto the ladder.

His gloved hand cradled hers, his thumb stroked over the back of her hand and he rocked her up and down while he steadily walked down the ladder. He was more careful than he usually would have been when he climbed down from the truck and got back onto solid ground.

He wouldn't let anything happen to the girl in his arms.

"You're okay, you're okay." He cooed as he lifted her higher against his chest and looked around the scene.

He didn't want to let her go.

What would happen if he held her for just a while longer? Would anyone stop him? Would someone take her from him? What if he couldn't find (Y/n) again? Possibilities ran through his head until his eyes lifted and he looked ahead to where one of the tents was set up in the middle of the foyer.

There she was.

He wasn't too sure where Eddie was, maybe he had been roped into getting the last part of the fire under control. Maybe he was getting patients to an ambulance for transporting, Evan wasn't sure, and suddenly he didn't care. All he cared about was watching that captivating girl hurry towards him as fast as she could in her state.

She had one arm tightly bound around her abdomen, making Evan sure that she was recovering from a C-section. Her eyes were looking at him as if she had tunnel vision, as if Evan was the only thing she could see. The only person worth looking at.

He could see the desperation in her eyes and the panic written across her face and when he glanced down, he realised she wasn't even wearing socks. She was barefoot, aiming for him to see if he had her baby.

"Is- Is it Rory?"

He was about to say no until it clicked a second later that Rory was short for Aurora. He liked that. He really liked that name.

"I've got her, she's fine."

It made something twinge in his chest like a muscle had snapped when he lowered the newborn down into her mother's arms. It was fascinating that (Y/n) didn't have to check the nametag on the newborn's wrist to know that this was her baby. Instinct must have taken over, unless she simply took Evan's word as gospel that this was indeed her child.

He could see the relief pooling in her eyes and she looked so thankful that she could have fainted and collapsed there on the spot. She held Rory close to her chest, dragging her thumb over the back of her soft head that she started to kiss. But her eyes looked up to stare at the fireman who had helped them.

She read the name on his helmet.

Buckley. 118.

She wasn't going to forget that in a hurry. (Y/n) would bear that name in mind, she was going to have to thank him for this.

"Can I take you to a medic, to make sure you're both okay?" Evan dared to rest his hand on her lower back and took a step closer until their sides were touching and he had to look down to see her face properly.

She nodded and he was spurred on when she didn't pull away or create some space between them. He motioned his other hand out in front of them and slowly started to guide them towards a paramedic he could see in the distance. They both needed to be checked out before they were taken somewhere to wait for transport to a different hospital for the remainder of their stay.

His eyes found their way back to (Y/n) when she lifted her head up and he saw a smile forming on her lips.

Her smile was beautiful. He wanted to keep that smile in his memory. He wanted to gaze on that smile and be the reason she smiled. He wanted to keep that smile for himself and be the one and only reason she sparkled as brightly as that.

"You're a real hero, you know that?" She sounded breathless and he could see she was subtly shaking, but her words were enough to spark a fire igniting throughout Evan's system.

He liked the sound of that.

He had never been a hero to anyone before. He had failed in trying to save Daniel, and that meant he would never be good enough in his parent's eyes. He had never done anything to warrant being a hero to Maddie. He had been there after she got away from Doug, but he never did anything to actually save her, not like he wanted to.

He hadn't been a hero to any of his past girlfriends and that had been okay, he didn't have anything to prove to them or a desire to be heroic for them.

But hearing (Y/n) say that, seeing her look at him like that, it sparked something to life in his chest and made his heart swell and his head rattle with ideas and thoughts and images of a future that he wanted. He liked the thought of being a hero to her. He liked the thought of being there when she needed him, of being the one to help her.

Curiosity dwelled in his eyes along with a spark that started to form. Maybe she needed a hero. Maybe (Y/n) was someone who needed saving.

Evan could do that. He could save her. He could be there and help her, he could definitely see himself trying to help her and the beautiful little bundle in her arms.

And as he stared down at the pair of them, he couldn't get that thought to leave his mind.

***

Something sparked in Evan's eyes when he looked dead ahead of him. He could feel all the blood rushing to his stomach, fluttering along with adrenaline and a sense of hope that was growing wings and trying to take flight.

She was here.

The girl. The one he had been thinking, imagining and dreaming about for the last week. The girl he had saved from the hospital, she was walking right through those station doors.

He knew it!

He knew, Evan just knew if he bided his time, he would run into her sooner or later. But oh, had it been hard. He found it so hard to stay focused at work, to go home each night and try to find a way to get her off his mind. Nothing worked. Going to the gym didn't help when she still plagued his thoughts and he couldn't push through the barrier she created. He couldn't find the attention span to watch movies after work.

He didn't want to go out for drinks with any of the team, and when some of the women on calls tried to flirt with him, Evan felt angered. They weren't her; they weren't (Y/n).

But now she was here. It just proved that Evan knew deep down it would work out. He knew he would bump into her again at some point, and it had only taken a week for her to walk into his station.

Evan didn't have to resort to hanging around where she lived- the address which he had found on her file that he checked back at the hospital fire when patients were being transported to different hospitals. He didn't have to wait around where she lived and try to catch another glimpse of her and create a casual meet.

He didn't have to go looking for her to stop her from haunting his every waking moment, because here she was, walking into his station like this was where she belonged all along.

Evan tossed down the cloth in his hand, rolled his eleeves up to his elbows and jogged ahead between the fire trucks. He wanted to make sure no one else got to her first. He wanted- no, he needed to be the one to talk to her, to find out why she was here. To find out if she was here to see him.

She looked lovely. Hair swept back out of her face, teeth sunk down into her bottom lip that looked like an anxious habit to Evan. She was wearing jeans and a pale turquoise shirt that cut a bit low down the front and had ruffles around the shoulders.

His eyes cast down to the pram she was pushing. She had brought Aurora down to the station.

"(Y/n), hi."

She paused when Evan approached and his heart ignited when he saw the way her lips curved into a beautiful grin that flashed her teeth and creased her eyes.

"Buckley… so I am at the right place." Her voice was so soothing, no hint of panic or torment like the first time they spoke. No panic written across her face and no anguish building up in her heart.

He saw the way she cast her eyes up and down his frame as he stepped closer and tucked his hands into his pockets. He couldn't help but look down into the pram, and his smile widened when he looked at the newborn tucked up beneath a blanket. She was sleeping, she looked very settled and calm and he loved that the beige hat she wore had a Mickey Mouse silhouette sewn into the centre.

"Call me Evan. What can we do for you? Are you both okay?" When Evan moved one hand from his pocket and motioned to the pram, he waited until (Y/n) nodded to reach down. He brushed his finger along Aurora's cheek, loving the way she seemed to lean into his touch like she knew exactly who he was and that he was someone she wanted to be around.

"We're fine, thanks to you. I came to say thank you, properly, for helping us last week."

Reaching down beneath the pram, (Y/n) found the tuppaware box and gingerly held it out to Evan. She tried not to blush or let heat rise to her skin when she saw the way he grinned as he took the box from her. It wasn't much, but she knew baked goods were always welcomed and she wasn't quite sure how else to say thank you. Other than to come down in person to show her gratitude and hand over some cookies.

"Thank you." Evan was already opening the box and diving in to try a cookie and he hummed when he bit into one. "You didn't have to, you know. It's all part of the job."

"It's not everyday a hospital has a fire, or that someone goes back in to get your baby for you. Thanks is the least I could do."

This may be an everyday thing for him, but not for (Y/n). She hadn't gone into the hospital expecting a mass fire to break out. She didn't expect to be evacuated or to have someone rush back inside to make sure her daughter wasn't still in there and get her out safe. She didn't dare think what would of happened if he hadn't of been there at that exact moment, to help her.

"So, she's doing okay?" His eyes cast down to the pram when he finished the cookie and tucked the box under one arm so he didn't drop it.

Part of him wanted to reach in and pick her up. She had seemed very settled when he held her last week at the hospital. He wanted to see if she would still settle with him. He wanted to cuddle her and see how she might attach herself to him, to see if she would remember who he was.

"Yeah, she's doing great. Keeping me awake at night, but that's what I signed up for."

"Just you two?" Evan spoke before he could stop himself and despite how quiet his voice came out, he knew (Y/n) heard him. He diverted his eyes down to the pram, brushing Aurora's cheek once again as she started to wriggle. But the quiet hum (Y/n) gave out handed him his answer.

Just her and her girl. They had each other, and that was all they needed.

"Hey, what're you doing here?"

Evan snapped his head up to look over at Bobby when the Captain trotted down the stairs from the kitchen and made a beeline their way. The sight of him walking forward had Evan's brows furrowing and he tilted his head to one side in uncertainty.

"Just stopped by to say thanks to your team, for being so lovely during the hospital evacuation last week."

The smile that flooded (Y/n)'s face when she looked up at Bobby had a slither of jealousy creeping up the back of Evan's spine and surging through his chest. How did she know Bobby? Why was she smiling like that at him? Hadn't she come here to see Evan, not the Captain?

He watched Bobby loop an arm around (Y/n)'s waist and reel her in for a hug, and he did his best to hide his grimace as he watched them. And he swallowed down a grumble when Bobby kissed the top of (Y/n)'s head and gave her a squeeze.

"Oh really? Stick around for a coffee, see the rest of the team." Bobby spoke into the top of (Y/n)'s hair and when he finally parted from her, he patted Evan's shoulder and leaned around him to look into the pram at Aurora. He had a few things to take care of, but he would make time for a coffee if (Y/n) stuck around for a while.

Bobby seemed to smile wider when he saw the newborn nuzzling into Evan's hand that was still stretched down towards her.

When he walked past them both and moved towards the back of the station, Evan turned his attention to (Y/n). He tried to keep his composure, stay standing tall and plastered the smile back on his face as he stepped closer to her. He liked the way she had to tilt her head at an angle to look up at him. He liked that doe look in her eyes and the way she smiled at him was as if he was the only person in the world worth talking to.

"You uh, you know Bobby?"

"He's my uncle, I used to stay with him a lot when I moved out here after school. He's Rory's godfather."

(Y/n) would say that she was closer to her uncle than she was to her own parents. He had practically taken her in when she moved out to LA not long after Bobby left Minnesota to come out here. She had always heard him talking about his team, but she had never come down to the station or formally met any of them. They were like Bobby's second family and sometimes it was easier to keep both his worlds separate.

But from what (Y/n) had briefly seen of the team, she knew she would like them, especially Evan.

"Oh, wow." Evan nodded and began walking, motioning his arm in the right direction as (Y/n) followed along at his side with the pram. She would stick around for a coffee and a chat before she took Rory back home.

As Evan dragged his hand up and down his jaw and listened to the sound of (Y/n)'s shoes clicking against the polished floor, he found himself smiling. He had no idea Bobby had a niece, or that his niece would turn out to be someone so lovely who Evan was finding himself thinking of at every waking moment.

He liked the idea of (Y/n) being related to Bobby. Evan had come to think of Bobby as the dad he'd never had growing up. Bobby looked after him, taught him life lessons, was there when he needed him and loved and supported him and told him when he was wrong and how to right his problems.

If (Y/n) was related to Bobby, that just meant that instead of feeling like Bobby was his foster dad, he would now have a connection to him. If Evan got close to (Y/n) and found himself in a relationship with her, he would therefore be more like a true relation to Bobby. This was the beginning of a family.

They would all be drawn closer together, and Evan wanted to be as close to (Y/n) as he could get.

***

Evan almost jumped out of his skin when a hand gripped his shoulder and he felt a tall presence leaning over his right shoulder. He could feel his heart hammering away so fast in his chest he thought his ribs were going to splinter.

He glanced over his shoulder and his eyes locked with Bobby. The Captain had a knowing grin on his face that put Evan at ease, he wasn't about to be reprimanded for anything and he wasn't going to have a stern conversation. He seemed to have taken some delight in making Evan nervous, something Bobby didn't do very often.

"So, my niece, huh?"

It took Evan by surprise and he had to take a few seconds to work out what Bobby was talking about. Until Bobby cast his eyes down to look at Evan's phone that was clasped in his hands, and they both looked at his lockscreen.

(Y/n).

A blush started to creep up the side of Evan's neck and dusted across his cheeks when he nodded. He wasn't sure how to respond to that because it didn't really sound like a question, it was more of a statement or a rhetorical question.

But Bobby didn't seem upset or annoyed or like Evan was overstepping any mark here. He looked happy, if Evan wasn't mistaken.

"I uh, I really like her, Bobby, and Rory. I'd never mess them around-"

"Kid, I trust you. You've come a long way, and I know you wouldn't do anything to hurt either of them. If you're both happy, then so am I."

He had Bobby's approval, and he didn't have to try or ask or say anything at all. Bobby was happy for them. He was happy that Evan was infatuated with his niece and would do anything for her. This was better than Evan had hoped for.

Something soft dwelled in (Y/n)'s eyes when she glanced towards the living room.

Evan was sweet.

He was stood behind the sofa, looking like he had been pacing up and down for a little while now. He had Rory in his arms who he had been holding for the last twenty minutes or so. He barely put her down, and she barely cried in his arms.

She couldn't quite believe how sweet and endearing Evan was being towards both her and Rory.

(Y/n) had been a little nervous and mostly unsure when Evan came round last week, and then again, and then popped by today. She wasn't sure why he wanted to befriend her so badly. She was a single mother with a newborn, she wasn't going to be much fun or good company, but Evan seemed intent on getting to know her. And he was more than eager to fuss Rory and settle her if she woke up, to give (Y/n) a break.

She folded her arms over the kitchen counter and tilted her head to one side, watching Evan with a growing smile that spread across her lips. He looked like he was a natural with kids, Bobby had said so himself. He said all the kids they had on calls or the school groups that stopped by the station all levitated to Evan like he was some kind of beacon.

He understood them, he was a friendly, understanding face and a fun person to be around. And he just seemed to have a natural talent with kids. When he came round to have a coffee with (Y/n), to see how she was and ask if she wanted to go for a walk or just spend some time together, he was always more than eager to have Rory around.

Not many men would be like that. Not many men at all would try and befriend (Y/n) or pursue her when she had a baby to look after. And not many men would be so taken with her newborn and try to offer help and be a friend to be around when needed.

She couldn't hear whatever Evan was saying to Rory, but the grin on his face made her wonder if he was relaying a story, possibly a work scenario.

Her eyes finally tore away from the pair of them to look down at her phone when it buzzed on the countertop.

*Me and Athena are having a BBQ at the weekend, do you want to come over? You can bring Buck XX

(Y/n) could feel herself lighting up at the thought of a party, but when she re-read her uncle's words again, her chest started to ignite with adrenaline and her face fell into a frown.

She could bring Evan? Why would he ask her that? Wouldn't he just invite Evan along anyway? Most of her uncle's parties or meals and events included his work team nine times out of ten. Evan would surely be on the list to be invited, he would likely be the first person they invited. Why was there any need for (Y/n) to bring him along?

For a brief moment, she glanced back over at Evan in the living room, watching as he moved to sit down on the sofa, still cooing and quietly chattering away to her daughter.

*Bring Buck? XX

*Don't worry, he told me. I'm happy for you both, he's a good kid and the team is eager to meet you XX

What on Earth did that mean?

What had Evan told her uncle? Did Bobby think they were in a relationship? Did anyone else think she and Evan were in a relationship?

She and Evan were friends, he had been kind to her and he was becoming a good friend. But they weren't in a relationship. He hadn't asked her and (Y/n) wasn't sure she was ready for that. Her last relationship had gone bust the moment she found out she was pregnant and (Y/n) made the decision to do this on her own. She wanted to have her baby and she was happy to be a single mother to Rory.

(Y/n) couldn't be thinking about a relationship right now, not after she'd just had Rory and her world was turned upside down, in the best possible way. She wasn't in the right moment to be thinking about getting into a new relationship.

Stuffing her phone into her back pocket, (Y/n) sighed and pushed off the counter. She was going to have to talk to him about this. Either Bobby had gotten the wrong end of the stick somewhere along the line, or Evan had said something he shouldn't. Or maybe Evan had gotten the wrong end of things, but how?

(Y/n) hadn't said anything or done anything to give Evan the wrong idea. They were friends.

She moved away from the counter, but paused when another buzz ticked through the air. That wasn't her phone. She dared to lean over, just to catch a glimpse of Evan's phone; it might be Bobby messaging him.

She wished she hadn't looked.

Why did Evan have a photo of (Y/n) as his lockscreen?

When had he even taken a picture of (Y/n)? She didn't recall Evan ever holding his phone up and taking a photo of her, she would of remembered something like that happening with someone she didn't know very well. Why was it made his lock screen? Why had he taken a photo of her?

A shiver crawled down her spine as she walked out of the kitchen and slowly headed into the living room. She tried to smile when she watched Evan gently ease Rory down in the rocker near the armchair. The newborn was fast asleep.

(Y/n) folded her arms over her stomach and leant one hip against the back of the armchair, trying not to look too panicked or too casual or uneasy.

"Evan, have you said something to Bobby, about us?" She forced herself to control her breathing and keep her tone light. She didn't want to argue with him or start something here, she just wanted to clear this all up.

The last thing they needed was to go to this barbeque at the weekend and have people asking if they were an item and one saying yes and the other saying no. They couldn't get things muddled up or let the lines blurr.

She watched his head tilt to one side and a lopsided smile formed on his lips as he squinted up at her.

"Well, yeah, I talk about you sometimes, so… he knows. He's fine with it, though, so don't worry."

"He knows?" Her head shook and the placid smile on her face showed her clear confusion.

She could feel panic dwelling up in her chest when Evan brushed his hands up and down his thighs and pushed up to his feet. She couldn't help but take a step back when Evan twisted and walked over to her. He walked slowly, as if he was a predator stalking towards her, assessing her movements. And (Y/n) held steady, not wanting to give the wrong impression or seem like she was angry when she was simply confused.

Her breath caught in her lungs and she could feel her throat tightening when he stepped so close, their chests were touching. She could feel each breath Evan took, pressing down against her and she couldn't help the shiver that rolled down her spine when Evan's fingers pressed beneath her chin and tilted her head up in his direction.

The way he smiled down at her made something twinge in (Y/n)'s stomach. She couldn't quite figure it out, but there was just something in his eyes that made her uneasy. That glimmer, that added, darkened look that made his pupils dilate and caused his mouth to curve into a splintered smile that set her on edge.

"Yeah, that you're my girls."

His words were followed by his lips pressing to her forehead that had started to spin in circles.

She didn't realise Evan's hands had moved to her hips or that he was nudging her back until the sofa pressed into her knees and she found herself sitting down. Her heart jumped into her throat once again and she could feel herself trembling when Evan sat down beside her.

He was close enough that their knees were touching and he curled one hand around her thigh while the other hand cupped the side of her neck. She could feel his thumb brushing softly across her jaw and when he leaned in, the only place for (Y/n) to go was to tilt backwards.

He was leaning over her. He was crowding her, surrounding her, blocking her exit and her senses and numbing her thoughts.

She didn't know what to do when he kissed her.

His lips were soft, but there was something behind his touch, something he was holding back. She could feel it in his touch, in the way his hand was so tense against her neck it was like he was about to start shaking. There was something in his hand gripping her thigh, like he was tempted to squeeze even tighter and pin her in place.

The feeling of his chest pressing down onto hers made (Y/n) sink further back into the sofa she was becoming compressed on when Evan was practically lying on top of her.

She stole as much air as she could manage in the second that their lips parted and she could feel Evan smiling into her mouth before he kissed her again.

This was moving too fast. They hadn't even gone out on a date or made any inclination towards dating. They were friends- (Y/n) thought they were friends.

Evan had come round to see her a few times, they had exchanged numbers. There was no reason for her picture to be on his phone or as his lockscreen. He shouldn't be kissing her now when they hadn't agreed to start dating and they didn't know each other well.

Evan had instagated this all on his own, he had attached himself to her and he didn't look like he was going to part from her. He had told his team that they were dating, he was already making it a well-known fact when the person he should have been talking to about this was (Y/n); the only person left in the dark about all of this.

What was she going to do?

#911 imagine #imagine #evan buckley #evan buckley x reader #evan buckley imagine #buck x reader #buck imagine #dark! buck #bobby nash #eddie diaz

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rayroseu · 11 hours

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idk if this means something and if its intentional, but Vil overblot's markings has a similar format with Overblot Malleus, they droop on the center and has a net pattern covering their forehead, (Riddle has a similar design as these as well but his markings passes down his left eye rather than forehead), also interesting that both Vil and Malleus' overblot marks has an extreme reference to the motifs of their Disney Villain counterpart (Most of the these overblot marks are just "aesthetically designed" like with Overblot Azul and Leona unless im missing some interpretation here lol)

Obviously, Vil's markings depicts the poisoned apple, while Malleus', if I overthink about it really hard, looks like Dragon Maleficent's face being split apart in flames (if you join together the center part of his overblot flame, it kinda looks like dragon!Maleficents head silouhette) bad edit lol

Its also interesting that those vertical diamonds in the center kinda looks like they're a sword/dagger stabbing through the apple/the dragon's head.

But my favourite part is Vil's markings... the design motif there are akin to Meleanor's laces to her clothes 😭✨

This design with the curved dark lines and hollow vertical strokes inside it, is on Riddle's as well (like on the borders of his overblot heart marking), but this is a special mention bcs Meleanor and overblot!Vil is awfully similar already based on design 😭✨

additionally, "that diamond on the center" thing kind of looks like an imitation to Meleanor's crown

But now, this is making me wonder... Was Meleanor's design created with overblot motifs in mind???😭💔 I remember being surprised she overblotted when that update came out, most of the assumptions about Malleus' mother's death pre-Book 7 is that she was mostly outpowered by the enemy, but rarely does it include that she overblotted too bcs pre book 7, they always emphasized that Draconia's are too powerful and based on Malleus' scenes before book 7 extremely in control of that power that they can just wield it nonchalantly (so it didnt gave off the vibe that they would overblot bcs that means they can be reckless with it (but nowadays i think this makes sense lol))

So with that said, does this mean that even from the start, like with her design, she was always meant to overblot, just like how most of the dorm leaders are the overbloters of each book?? 😭

edit.

random realization too lol but Vil and Malleus' share the same design on their skirt and their legs and maybe arms (but I feel like that design applies to all overblotters), They literally parallel with each other too 😭✨ Queens sharing fashion tips lolol

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hannahluvsbillie · 2 days

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was it ever casual?

part 1

✮ pairing : billie eilish x reader

✮ cw: nothing too heavy, angst (kind of)

ᡣ𐭩 a/n: sorry for the wait!! my tumblr hasn’t been letting me post anything! but we’re here now and that’s all that matters. thank you sm for all the love on part one, it means everything to hear you like my writing 🥺🥺

the rain pitter patters on the window of billie’s car, it was pitch black with the exception of a few small streetlights in the empty parking lot.

it was damn near silent in the car, only the sounds of soft music playing were heard.

at least it was, until you got a notification.

you pick up your phone from the console, seeing a text from some random person you gave your number to at a party last week because he wouldn’t stop bugging you.

“hey, wanna meet up soon? still in la for the week.”

the text read.

billie’s eyes glance over at your phone, out of your peripheral vision you see her brows furrow at the message.

your eyes dart to billie, and you immediately put your phone down. not wanting her to see the message.

this just makes her brows furrow further, and her face contort a little.

“who’s that?” she asks, her voice stern. the hand that was once on your thigh moves back to her own, silently telling you she’s suspicious.

“don’t worry about it.” you say, glancing over at her and putting your phone under your thigh. you didn’t intent to mock her statement from the last meet up you had, but it just came out.

these past few times you’ve hung out with her, you’ve been noticing the abundance of notifications she gets while you’re together. you try to comfort yourself by saying it’s just her friends, or her family blowing up her phone. but you know, you know it’s other girls.

“im worried about it, who else is talking to my girl?” she states, the smallest hint of playfulness in her voice.

“my girl.” the nickname always seemed to find its way into her words while she was with you, but the once meaningful nickname that used to give you butterflies has lost meaning. how many other girls does she call “my girl” ?

you look away, you find yourself feeling annoyed at her words. she does the same shit to you, so why should she be mad about it?

“it’s not like we’re dating.” you say, glancing over at her only to see her brows raised at your comment. you were never this feisty with her, what did she do?

she moves her head just enough to look into your eyes, her brows still raised in surprise. “yeah, we aren’t. but i wanna know if my girl’s talking to someone else.” she says coldly.

your brows raise, matching her expression. you shake your head in disbelief, how could she be so dismissive?

“billie, you do the same fucking thing.” you say, your voice seems to have lost that soft, sweet, gentle tone it regularly has when you speak to billie.

“that’s- that’s different ma.” she says, feeling like she’d just been called out on her bullshit.

you shake your head once again, your hands fiddle with themselves in your lap.

“how is that any different? they blow up your phone constantly and when i ask you about it you brush me off.” you say softly, turning your head to meet her gaze.

she rolls her eyes at your response, starting to get agitated with you.

“because you’re my girl y/n. no one else’s.” she says, her eyes shooting darts into yours.

that doesn’t sound very causal, but to hell with causal at this point.

“i wish i could say that about you billie.” you say, shooting her a glare.

“oh my god- baby. we’ve been through this a million times. they don’t mean anything to me.” she says, her voice starting to get more cold by the second. how could she just lie to you like that?

you turn to face her, you can’t hold back anymore.

“bullshit.” you say coldly, her eyebrows raise in response.

“if i meant anything to you i wouldn’t be sitting in your car at 1 in the morning- let alone letting you eat me out in your car, or only meeting with you in secluded places, or the fact you won’t text me back for a week. it’s like im only here when your bored.” you ramble, finally letting your feelings spill out. it felt nice to call her out, even though you knew she wouldn’t tell the truth.

“baby- y/n- you know damn well it’s not like that.” she says, looking at you with furrowed brows.

in all honesty, billie didn’t know you felt like that. so what she’d talk to other girls, you were still the one she saw the most.

“so what is it then?” you ask sharply, furrowing your brows at her. you had to swallow the lump that was forming in your throat.

she looks away, trying to think of a way to possibly answer that question.

“we’re just- a casual thing y/n, don’t act like it’s more then that because it’s not.” she says coldly, her response shooting daggers into your heart.

a moment of silence falls between billie and you, neither of you knew what to say, or what was the right thing to do.

but you knew one thing, you couldn’t keep doing this with her. if that’s how she really feels, then you two aren’t on the same page.

it’s not causal when you look at her like she hung the damn stars every time she speaks.

“just- take me home billie.” you say, looking into her eyes. you were so tired of begging for her to choose you. it’s all that you’ve done is beg for her attention this whole- situationship. or whatever the fuck you wanted to call it.

she scoffed in disbelief, shaking her head. her hand went down to the shift and put the car into drive.

“god damn it- fine.”

#billie eilish x reader #billi eilish x reader fluff #billie eilish x reader fluff #billie #billie x reader #billie eilish #billie the goat #idk how to tag this #i love you #fics #Spotify

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angelpuns · 2 days

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Lil Hater Au Prequel Blurb:

Leo stormed through the lair, trying his hardest not to look incredibly worried. He rushed past the living room, a sound of general confusion following him. He didn't bother looking back, he thinks by how deep the voice was it must have been Raph.

He didn't have time to stop and he didn't have time to explain. He hurried to his room, huffing at the effort it took to slide his doors open. He needed to make a mental note to ask Donnie to oil it. Or he could himself. Whatever, he probably wouldn't remember regardless.

Leo leaned his crutches against the wall and hurried to pull his gear on. Wraps, pants, belt, knee brace.

He struggled with the second one, but ultimately decided to wear it. He planned to be fighting, whether it was his friend or someone else, and he'd need the support.

Leo fumbled with the cool metal of his battle shell, cursing under his breath at all the time he was wasting. He needed to hurry! He wasn't gonna make it if he didn't hurry! He quickly pressed the button to adjust the pressure and did a little stretch to test it. Perfect as always.

One sword was slotted into the holster on His back, the other held tight as he hurriedly reached for his crutches.

He spotted Raph poking his head in the door just as he opened a portal, shooting his older brother a (hopefully) reassuring smile before stepping inside.

He winced at the high pitched ring of electricity that always accompanied it, his cochlear quickly readjusting as he was transported to the back room of Run of the Mill.

It was quiet back here, the voices of patrons far enough away that even he couldn't hear it. And just as he thought, Yuichi was standing with his hand on the back door’s handle.

He had quickly turner at Leo’s arrival, a knowing scowl already on his face.

“ Leo, I told you not to bother,” He huffed, turning to face him fully, “ nothing you say is gonna stop me.”

Leo gave him a once-over. Yuichi was in his old Nexus gear, though it didn't seem to fit him well anymore. In personality or in size.

“ What you're doing is idiotic. What if you take another hit to the head? Or you have a seizure?” Leo started, slotting his sword into its holster, “ you think those guys in the arena are gonna wait and make sure you're okay?”

Yuichi didn't answer, grimacing. He didn't meet Leo's eyes, hunching in on himself further.

Leo swallowed. The thought of it had him tossing and turning most nights, new nightmares adding to an already startling collection. He didnt want to say it in case it became a reality.

But how was he gonna get it through this fluffbrain's thick skull if he didn't voice It?

“ They'all kill you, Yuichi…”

The words felt like glue in his mouth, sticking badly to his teeth. Like Leo was sentencing his friend to death with just that statement.

“They won't! I'm… I'm not weak, Leo!” Yuichi fired back, letting out a sigh and letting his hands dall to his sides, fists clenching.

He stood up a little straighter, eyes meeting Leo's for the first time since he'd gotten here.

“ I have to do this. She has my sword, and I have no intention of letting her get away with keeping it for another day longer,”

He turned to leave, Leo stumbling forward to reach out and grab his arm. It stopped him for a moment, and Leo seized the opportunity to squeeze a little tighter.

“ Yui, come on, you're not this stupid. You know she won't give it up without a fight, “ He started. He never understood why Yuichi was always so serious about getting the sword back. Leo understood more than anyone about how it felt to lose a precious weapon, but it had never been worth his life. It had never meant making such a dogshit deal with the devil herself.

“ Leo, let me go…”

Yuichi pulled weakly at his arm, but Leo pulled him back a little, letting out a weak laugh.

He was getting desperate.

“ its just a sword, Cottontail! We can get another-”

Yuichi ripped his arm from Leo's grasp, the slider stumbling forward to catch himself at the sudden balance shift.

Yuichi's face was shattered, tears threatening to spill and cheeks flush with anger. He bared his teeth for a second, words choked out UB angry hiss.

“ it's not just a sword, Leo!”

He let out a shuddery breath and quickly wiped his eyes, hand on the door handle again.

“ you don't understand! I have to do this, I have to be the one to do this!” He opened the door, the roar of a crowd and the bright lights of the battle nexus arena suddenly flooding the dark, quiet backroom.with light and sound.

Leo flinched at the adjustment in his tympana and grimaced, “ at least me me help you! I'm- I can help you!”

“ NO!” Yuichi didn't even turn to look at him, “ I have to do this alone!”

He stepped through the door, leaving it open behind him as he started through the long corridor leading out to the arena.

Leo could only watch, heart in his throat. Whether that was because of the thudding of the arena past the door or because he as fucking terrified, he didn't know. He trued one last time, leaning and shouting through the door.

“ YOU’RE GONNA DIE OUT THERE!”

and in the last second before the door shut itself, he saw Yuichu turn with such a fearful look and lock eyes with him.

He was scared. And Leo couldn't help him in the slightest.

#rottmnt #rottmnt leo #rottmnt fanfic #lil hater au #lil hater au drabbles #fic #fanfic #hopefully therr arent any spoilers in here #uhhh i wrote it when I was eepy #so its not that great #but yah #enjoy

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raayllum · 3 days

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Faith and Relationships in TDP

Relationships in TDP—familial, platonic, romantic, etc.—place a lot of emphasis on belief. Do you believe me? Do you believe in me? Is the way you see me the way I see myself, good or bad? This has always been an undertone of course, but some Rayla-Aaravos parallels and Viren with Kpp'Ar made it ping in my head, so I thought it was time to talk about.

Relationships that will be examined roughly in order:

Harrow + Sarai / Harrow + Viren

Viren and Kpp'Ar

Claudia and Soren

Terry and Claudia

Aaravos and Claudia

Rayla and Callum

Janai and Amaya

Ezran with his council and Zym

Janai and her people

I'm sure there'll be others (Ellis is going to make an appearance at one point, Runaan and Rayla, and possibly Karim / Miyana as a contrast) but this is what came to mind most notably. I'm also going to do my best to stay out of the weeds with TDP talking about how characters view things (or their perspectives of each other / actions magic etc.) as beliefs as otherwise we'd be here quite literally all day, but there will inevitably be some of that. But without further ado let's look into it:

Living Up to How People Think of You: Does Being Believed In Make You Better?

Time and time again we see TDP frame faith (and trust though that could be a separate meta on its own, but we'll touch on it a bit here), specifically someone having faith in you, as something that can make you better. If you have faith in someone, you trust and believe in them to behave a certain way—in ways that likely align with why you love them or believe in them—and so long as those patterns are maintained, the love and faith and trust remains. The belief holds and continues to be a steady foundation.

This is something I noticed being particularly prevalent in S1, specifically between how Viren talks about his dynamic with Harrow, and how it mirrors how Viren talks about Harrow's relationship with Sarai.

Now this comparison is actually one of the reasons Viren/Harrow always felt a bit fruity to me ever since S1 aired, since as Viren explains:

He asked me to stand next to him for the portrait because he knew I would stand by him through anything. I have to stand by him through this too. [...] It means there's one more thing I can do to convince him. (1x02)

Your sister made him better. Harrow told me he was never as strong or brave

but he tried every day to be stronger and braver so he could live up to what she saw in him. (1x05)

For Viren and for Harrow, this "I want to live up to how you see me" was ultimately a good thing. In Harrow's relationship, he did his best to live up to how Sarai saw him, and that meant being a loving compassionate father, and trying to be a champion of "strength and justice". She reminded him of his best principles and understood them, and it's clear that her words got through to him in his final days with his rejection of dark magic and urging their sons to break the cycle. For Viren, Harrow's words likewise got through to him, with Viren becoming a better father for the first time since Soren and Claudia's early childhood and in what he sacrificed to save Katolis: his own refusal of dark magic, and acknowledging that like Harrow, he should've been a not just a king, but "a servant".

But in classic TDP fashion, someone believing that you can be better, or believing that someone makes you better, is not always a good thing:

Aaravos believed in humans when all the other elves and dragons thought we were worthless, stupid, dirty animals.

So he gave us magic.

Aaravos' 'belief' in humanity, and in Claudia by extension ("But no matter: your daughter is far more powerful"), is the foundation of her loyalty to him. Claudia is extremely receptive to how other people view her, which is why she's coarse about judgement and tries to maintain a positive internalized viewpoint ("But I'm not evil. It's me. You know me") of her own self and actions, even while routinely acknowledging that she's doing increasingly "vile, dangerous" things. Likewise, her belief in Aaravos begins with faith that he can save her father, evolves into gratitude for what he's given humanity (because until S6, dark magic is always routinely a positive net force to her), and is bolstered by her own feedback loop with a Viren who's trying his best. His assertion that "you do anything for your child never the other way around" while trying to spare her helps her justify Aaravos' actions, since he's acting on behalf of Leola, and therefore whatever he does is "necessary. Like my dad."

Conversely for elf-human relations, we have Callum and Rayla. Callum is also a burgeoning mage, and Rayla is also important to his magical journey, providing a listening ear and occasionally some sound advice. The S2 novelization goes so far as to say that Rayla is the first person to tell Callum

“I believe in you.” Callum blushed. No one had ever said those words to him before, or at least not that he remembered.

And we see her routinely express faith in her friends, particularly Callum and Ezran, even when the odds are stacked against them, other people disagree (Runaan, Lujanne, Sol Regem), or they don't have faith in themselves:

She has faith that Katolis and her boys won't be like the Silvergrove when she returns (and they aren't). She does her best to believe in Ezran in 1x09, or at least not be a jerk even if she can't totally take him at his word due to her own skepticism. She's another elf who also believes that humans are capable and strong, and sometimes even more so than elves:

The human kicked dirt at her, and Rayla scraped at her eyes, angry—infuriated, even. Humans were frustrating. Humans were clever. Humans could do anything, they could be anything, they could take their own fates and change them—

Which is, of course, the opposite thread of belief that Aaravos actually holds, which is that his pawns will always make his parts and that Callum playing into his hands and being nothing more than a pawn is inevitable. Callum also returns this in 5x01, citing "If she didn't tell me, she had a good reason," and that knowledge/belief is all that needs to not only set Rayla free, but reassert that she doesn't owe him an explanation until she wants to give one free of obligation and guilt — as she eventually does, changing her fate bit by bit at a time.

So does being believed in make you better? Overall TDP says that it can if you let it and work consistently towards it, but it does depend on what the belief is. We'll also loop back around this idea when we talk more about TDP's thread of having faith another section from now, but moving forwards to:

Belief as a Continuing Thread

The distinction between "this person believing in me" as an act of betterment versus "belief as a continuing thread," is, in my head, a difference of actively working towards living up to person's belief in you versus that belief forming a continual relationship foundation of stability and stagnation rather than change. In other words, belief as a continuing thread probably bleeds in the most into worldviews—I am a good person because I do Y, I stand by your side because of X, and as long as those beliefs built on actions aren't disrupted, they are maintained.

We see this perhaps encapsulated most in Terry and Claudia's relationship. Terry's belief in Claudia isn't about any sense of making her better ("Look at her sleeping, she's just perfect"—4x04) or guiding her down a specific path ("I can't [tell you what to do]"—6x04). He's not trying to change her, but instead, it's the foundation of his support for her. His belief in Claudia is built into their dynamic and why he is so loyal to her, as he explains in 4x09:

I've seen you do a lot of awful things, dark magic things. But I always believed in you because you had a reason.

As touched on here in a meta more about Terry overall, this is also why he doesn't like Aaravos in S6, because Aaravos' reasoning isn't love but revenge, and that's Terry's internal tipping point, even if Claudia can't recognize the distinction yet.

Of course, we can also see these continuing bonds of belief be severed. Unlike how Viren was trying to live up to what Harrow thought of him, or Harrow with Sarai, Viren and Kpp'Ar's relationship was a much more outright, direct mentor-mentee dynamic, Viren even following in Kpp'Ar's footsteps to become high mage:

I turned on him. My mentor, my... my teacher. A man who believed in me when... when I was nothing, and spent years of his life invested years of his life helping me become... what I became.

It's worth noting, I think, therefore, that while Viren does have clear regret over coining Kpp'Ar, he does still describe the act as necessary to Lissa in the past and in recounting the event in the letter. It is only after he takes Lissa's tears by force that we see him directly agree with her assessment of him being a monster. We also see Viren's continuing search for importance ("When I was nothing" / "I thought you were going to be something special, something important!" / "You're a nobody" to Kpp'Ar) parallel Claudia's views on dark magic as well ("We weren't born with magic, we were born with nothing" / "Humans had nothing").

This continuing thread of belief is also what allows Rayla to bring people back from being 'monsters' in a way with Esmeray and Runaan later on in the season through her faith that she can get through to them and help them, and that they're capable of receiving help.

In a similar vein of disillusionment of Viren and Kpp'Ar, though, we also see Soren come to this realization (and then back again, in some ways, in S6) with Viren:

I've known Viren longer than anyone here. I mean, because he's my dad, but it took me a long time to understand who my dad really is. And it was hard to see, because I really... I really looked up to him. He's smart, and the way he talks, you really believe that he's a good person, that everything he does is to protect his family, his home, or all of humanity. He makes you think that as long as you do what he says, you must be doing the right thing. Even when he asks you to do something bad. Something evil. So the truth is, someone who wants you to do horrible things and convinces you that they're good, that's a villain. My dad is a villain. And he's only gonna get more powerful, and the more powerful he gets, the more people will listen to him, and believe him, and follow him.

We see the continuing thread of Soren not trying to change Viren or Viren trying to change for him (in arc 1), but of Soren understandably believing in his father and Viren's judgement precisely because of things Soren perceives as lacking in himself ("I know I'm not the smartest / Dad is so smart, so I figured there must be a good reason") and because as a child / young adult, you're inclined to believe whatever your parent tells you at more or less face value. That said, Soren does talk specifically about how belief in others can intersect with belief in leadership, which is interesting in its own way. So let's move onto:

Belief as Faith / Having Faith In Our Leaders

Having faith in our leaders is something we've touched on already, albeit indirectly. Sarai believed in Harrow to be "a champion of love and justice"; Soren and Claudia believed at different intervals that their father would be a good leader. We see this reflected in Janai and Amaya's relationship predominantly in season 6:

Do you think I can lead my people after everything that's happened, all the mistakes I've made?

We see this similar theme in how Opeli and Corvus interact with Ezran in S3, where they support him as a monarch, specifically, as well as a person:

Ezran and Janai are also characters who tend to have a lot of faith in others, as well, which is part of their leadership. Janai has "patience and faith" that they can rebuild, that the architect can make her amends, etc. Ezran routinely has steadfast faith in his loved ones and their ability likewise to be better (not executing Viren, setting Soren and Claudia free, "She'll know what to do" / "she's alive, and wherever she is, she loves you too" about Rayla, "I think he would want you to, if you wanted to" about Callum and Harrow, etc). Even with Zym in season two:

But we'll get it, no matter how impossible it seems. We believe in ourselves, and we're not giving up, are we?

which is also a sentiment Janai extends to her people:

So we can have faith in others, in ourselves ("I will learn magic. It's who I am"), in our leaders, some prejudiced worldviews ("No, humans are liars" / "Are they really your friends, or are they just taking advantage of you?") and have all those things intermingle. We've talked briefly about disillusionment in threads of continued belief, and failing to live up to the beliefs / views of how others see us, or when belief breaks. I want to close this out by talking about Runaan and Rayla, briefly, namely:

This fits in this section (in my head) precisely because Runaan is Rayla's leader as well as her father, which is a unique dynamic that only Viren-Soren&Claudia get close to replicating, of being believed in by someone who also very explicitly tells you what to do (hi Claudia with Aaravos). Runaan lived in one reality (Rayla can be an assassin) and then immediately went to the other (she never will be) with no in between.

Meanwhile, we have characters like Ellis and Callum, who are able to acknowledge other people's realities even if they can't (for a variety of reasons) fully commit to them and sit somewhere more in the middle, which I think is interesting, particularly when it likewise comes to changing plans or acknowledging other realms/perspectives of reality.

And if I go any further into those weeds I'll start talking about TDP's whole emphasis on trust that is twice as long as this meta already is, I'm sure, so with that I'll wrap things up (sort of).

Conclusion, Kind Of

This doesn't have a real conclusion because this is so sprawling with like, a hopefully but not necessarily coherent common thread, but basically:

When you act in alignment with how others see you, this can help you live up to your 'full potential' — good or bad. And if it's bad, that might be a time to break their continued thread of faith in you, or you towards them, in order to be something truly better and new. All relationships, positive or negative, depend on faith/belief because they depend on reliability and expectation, and when those things are broken, this can either transform a relationship for the better or demolish it completely.

Are you having fun? Was this fun?

Anyway can't wait for S7 to ruin my life with Terry-Claudia, Callum-Ezran, and Callum-Rayla's threads of belief in particular.

—Dragons out

#tdp #the dragon prince #analysis series #analysis #parallels #the gang's all here

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sturnlovaa · 1 hour

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°•. IMAGINE — Christopher Sturniolo breeding you.

cw.. unprotected p n v, rough sex, begging, praising, implied cream pie.

"Chris," you whimpered, your voice raw from moaning his name. your body trembled, knees quaking as he drove into you with a force that was almost violent in its intensity.

"shh," he whispered, one hand reaching around to cup your breast, his thumb brushing over your nipple. "just take it like a good girl. let me fill you up," his other hand grasped your hip, holding you in place as he continued to thrust into you.

his pace was relentless, each stroke hitting your cervix with a satisfying thud. you felt like you were being split open, your pussy stretched to its limits. tears streamed down your face as you buried your face in the pillow, your screams muffled by the fabric.

his body was flush against yours, his hot breath on your neck as he wrapped his hands around yours, pressing them flat against the mattress. "i don’t want to pull out," he hissed in your ear, his voice low and gravelly.

"i want to keep going until you can't anymore. until I've pumped you so full that there's no way you won't get pregnant,"

his hips moved with a mind of their own, slamming into you over and over again. the sound of flesh hitting flesh filled the room, along with your muffled moans and his ragged breathing. "you feel so good," he growled, his fingers tightening around yours.

"please.." you whined, your voice barely a whisper. "it's too much, i can't.." your words trailed off into a soft moan as he hit that spot inside you again and again. "that's it, baby," he encouraged, his voice hoarse.

"show me how much you can take. show me you're my good girl, meant to be filled by me," his words, laced with possession and desire, spurred you on, and you pushed back against him, silently begging for more.

the pressure became unbearable as he continued to stretch you, his thick length spearing you again and again. you could feel your body tensing, ready to milk him for all he was worth. "it's — it's.. please.." you choked up, your voice hitching.

"not yet," he grunted, his hands squeezing yours tighter. "not until I say so. you're going to take it all, and then some," his words were punctuated by his hips slamming into yours, the sound of flesh meeting flesh echoing through the room.

tears streamed down your face as he continued to pound into you, his thickness stretching your walls to the limit. your body was on the verge of breaking, but he showed no mercy, his movements becoming even more brutal. "look at you," he panted, "so beautiful, so broken... so fucking perfect,"

"i can feel you tensing — you're close aren't you?" he leaned in, his teeth nipping at your earlobe. "remember who you belong to, my love. remember who's putting this baby in you,"

"y-yours.." you stammered, the dam inside you ready to burst. "Christopher.." your words dissolved into a mess of incoherent sounds as your body finally gave in, convulsing around him with violent force.

he let out a low growl as your walls clamped down around him, milking him for all he was worth. "that's it, baby," he grunted, his own release barreling through him like a freight train.

with a roar, he buried himself to the hilt inside you and held still, his thick length pulsing as he filled your womb with his seed. wave after wave of his hot, sticky cum flooded your uterus, ensuring that his sperm would take root deep within you.

his large hands released yours, instead cradling your body against his as he continued to spill himself into you, his hips giving small, shallow thrusts as if trying to get as deep as humanly possible.

©sturnlovaa

— tags

@shadowthesim , @ifwdominicfike , @sturniolo04 , @mattsdolll , @sturncakez , @jetaimevous , @biiatrizzz , @blahblogs-stuff , @chlotapcs , @poolover123 , @55sturn , @franticroads , @brvtall , @gwennybenny , @starlace111 , @luvs4matt , @lov3bug .

#christopher sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo fluff #sturniolo smut #e writes ౨ৎ #sturnlovaa

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itsblasttothepast · 2 days

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As a Franco fan I'm SO endeared by Checo and the way he instantly gave Fran such a warm welcome 🥺 He said he knew firsthand how much harder it is for latinos to make it to F1 compared to europeans and that Franco deserved a full year seat, so that's why I think his compliment during the race was 100% intentional to boost his chances a little. Even if he meant to ask for a new strategy, he could've simply said this is not working, let's just pit or whatever and he didn't! He's not getting anything in return, it was humble, genuine praise right when everyone's competitiveness is at its peak. Apart from a few drivers, I can't imagine others doing that. Many would be fuming even 🤫

After the race it made me very happy to hear Franco say he loved Checo and that he used to wake up early to watch his races when he was a kid because I don't hear young drivers say that about Checo very often, you know? since most grew up admiring mainly Lewis, Fernando, etc. He deserves his flowers too!

Sorry for the rant lol I'm just really happy to see the reciprocated respect and love between both !!!

Oh, don't apologize anon, I share the exact sentiment about these two. It's so amazing how supportive Checo is, he really wants Franco to stay in F1 and show all the latino power, and the fact that he acknowledged how good Franco is doing is something not any driver would do.

The fact that they both speak so candidly about each other shows the respect and fondess they feel, it's so refreshing and nice.

I just wish some fans stopped comparing them and acting like one has to be better than the other. We have two Latin Americans here! We should be proud and cheer for them, no making stupid posts about who is best.

Thank you for your ask anon! Checo has a new son, and he'll defend him all the way.

Hugs for you!

#anon questions #franco and checo are the best #so respectful and nice #sergio perez #checo perez #franco colapinto

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callixspod · 14 hours

Text

Your affection. [Read ID]

might make an animatic out of this BUT!! here's more of my brain blasted insanities. Rambles of "I<3U" AU below here ↓

What began as a simple one off story about a living digital consciousness inside a video game to be implemented on Persona 4, and their unused game files hidden behind folders, left to collect dust. But it still remains, waiting for anyone to discover it.

I can't put on the details on how Yosuke even gained sentience, but I can tell you now that this AU simply took place on Persona 4 Vanilla. (Not golden. As much as it has its own content I will be sticking with its roots. So yes, Yosuke didn't own/bought a motorcycle. That event never happened.) Hanamura's odd behavior only happened when the Player bought the game with a specific player ID. So their gameplay experience will be on their perspective of how this one character manages to know, everything about them. Also slightly close to creepypastas which, I loved. Huhu.

This can be seen as a Yume or Souyo ship perspective so pick your poison

Now it's time for Yosuke's unique behavior towards the player when they progress the game. His depraved ass was already set to go off when the player was given the option to pick miscellaneous interactions between the characters, mostly to follow up Yosuke's questions or any one of the investigation team to mention anything about Yosuke. The options being "What kind of girls do you prefer?", "Looking great [insert name]" or the famous "Which ones are you looking forward to see in a swimsuit"

If you're like me and didn't indulge on having a romantic subchoice to any of the members, that's where it triggers the start of a few bugs and glitches manifested behind the scenes, fuelling the code until it couldn't automatically run on itself, but from something else manually taking over. Manifesting the game to not coordinate with its ordered storyline, changing the system to be primarily more unique than others.

When Yosuke only appears for a few days on the weekend, suddenly his model would stand in position to a day that he was not meant to show up. He was meant to show up on a Sunday. So why was he here out in daylight on a Saturday? Other strange occurrences are if whenever Yosuke was on scene, closeups and corrupted texts would come in to reach out to the Player, sending a message that only he and the other side of the screen can see.

Now his normal dialogue never wound up to show from the screen, simply replaced with vague, short-ended questions asking them if "Are you there?" "Can you hear me?" "I can't see you, but I can still hear your voice." "Will you show me someday?" That last part was not a suggestion. Really demanding, hard for him to know he'll be left alone all over again if the Player turns off their game, aw :( And he keeps remembering the shit I gave to you even when I didn't need some of them.

So that's it? I think??? 😭 There will be more, later I'm rlly tired.

until then, have what's served on this 4 stat Yelp restaurant.

#persona 4 #yu narukami #yosuke hanamura #souyo #I<3U AU #my art #fanart #attempted to make him look. on model as possible #the warmup sketches says so #i hope that i managed to explain it okay cos my eyez are starting to feel hwsvy #vhgujj

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asheurbanipal · 13 hours

Text

If I have your wife, then kill me and eat me whole

on A03

<<Previous Episode

Summary:

As Logan and Wade move out of their honeymoon phase, more complex relationship issues emerge. For Wade, it's a surge of jealousy. A jealousy that Logan is doing everything in his power not to reflect back, reigning in its destructive power. It takes a harrowing encounter with a bolt cutter to get them on the same page.

Deadpool/Wolverine

Explicit

Words: 7044

One-shot in series

Content: angst, oral, jealousy, violence, mild torture. kidnapping

Should have gone to the gay bar. Those vibes look immaculate over there.

Wade laid his hands loosely around a chipped highball glass and a bottle of the shittiest beer imaginable, the bar dark against his back. He ran through the last few days, double checking everything off the list.

Day one: recon. No issue. Their security was garbage.

Day two: copy the data. Easy. Just slap that bitch on a flashdrive.

Day three: flash drive delivery to a drop location but not before making a copy to pass off to the X-Men. Not that the client knew about that part.

Day four: attacked by a group of ninja? Samurai? Some kind of a fighting force all in black with a weird overtone of anti-Asian stereotyping. They were clearly pissed off about the whole "stealing information" thing, and he and Logan kind of accidentally killed them all before finding out the details.

Oops.

And not even any hand-written letters laying out revenge plans to scavenge from a corpse.

In order to do mercenary work while still upholding the moral standards of the X-Men, Logan had a set of rules and compromises to follow if he was going to join Wade on a job. No politics. Nothing that harmed a pro-mutant organization. Nothing that got in the way of scientific progress (that was a special request from Hank). The X-Men got a copy of any data obtained during corporate espionage. They may not need it, at the moment, but knowledge was power.

And as few corpses as possible with the ideal number being zero.

Oops, again.

I'll take the heat on that one with Mr. Lazer and Wheels.

If Logan slipped up too much on a mission or let Wade get too far afield, they might lose access to the little cottage on the edge of the mansion property. Xavier, at some point, had conceived of a version of the school that was a little more…general? Something like that? And that meant non-mutant teachers, maybe? Wade was still unclear on the reasoning, just that it meant there were little two-room cabins scattered at the far extents of the grounds. These had been offered as a place for him and Logan to live as long as they behaved.

It had been very hard to behave.

They had been able to get a drop-off from the Blackbird on its way to whatever business, but they had to drive back over the next two days. They had taken off right after dealing with the vaguely racist commandos, so they were still dressed in their suits from the neck down. Logan needed a "goddamn drink" before they settled in for the night at the nearby shit-fuck motel. The only place that would take cash and not ask questions. No credit cards when someone was on your ass.

And Logan had pulled him into this place. Dark. Depressing. Okay, yeah, maybe perfect, honestly. Wade slammed back a swig from his bottle, then rolled it along its bottom edge.

A body dropped onto the barstool next to him. Wade gave the guy half a glance but didn't linger. He didn't look like someone out to kill him. Not a recognizable antagonist. Kind of weird that he sat right there, but then people were allowed to be weird in a perfectly mundane fashion.

Still…

He flicked a knife on the inside of his wrist and waited for shit to get stupid.

"You here alone?" the fucking weirdo asked. This time Wade actually looked at him. Big guy, soft and jowly, trucker cap on backwards, greasy with a sort of mullet thing happening. Patchy, gross-ass goatee. Just a real mess of a man.

"No, here with my boyfriend. But he's taking a piss." Wade tapped the edge of the glass of Wild Turkey that he was guarding for Logan.

"Boyfriend?" Gross-dude took a swig of his Coors Lite.

"Yeah. He's The Wolverine. The X-Man Wolverine."

"I'm sure he is." They guy leaned in, moving his body into Wade's space.

"No, I mean that literally. And he will kick your ass." Wade flexed his wrist, tipping his knife into place.

Gross-dude dropped his hand from the bar then started sliding it across Wade's thigh.

"Maybe you give my little wolverine a try?"

Oh that is the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard.

Wade twitched the knife. He saw the image in his head, blade through the man's hand into his thigh. His reaction would be worth the pain and annoyance of repairing his suit.

Then out of the corner of his eye, the bathroom door opened.

Oh no let Logan do it. That'll be hilarious.

#####

What an absolute nightmare of a job.

And now some asshole had his hand on Wade's thigh. He knew that was Deadpool, right? That he was about twenty seconds away from massive amounts of pain?

But Wade wasn't doing anything. PTSD reaction? Freeze response?

No, Wade was fucking with him, probably. Some kind of weird goof. Better to step in before the guy got knocked down and didn't wake up again. He moved across the room to Wade's other side, slid a thumb through a loop on the back of Wade's suit, and plucked the worst bourbon he'd ever had up from the ring of Wade's arms.

"Hey, babe, are we ready to go soon?" They hadn't opened a tab, paying in cash, so they could just leave if this was going to be a problem.

"Yeah, I was just talking to my new friend." Wade's eyes narrowed at him in annoyance. Logan glanced down to see the man's hand slowly retreating. He had gotten the message. They were good to go. The man started backing away, hands up.

But Wade kept looking at him. Then back at Logan. Then back at the man as he moved away. Then back at Logan. There was something there, like he was attempting to communicate without words. He could barely communicate with his words, so this wasn't effective.

"Really?" Wade finally said.

"What?" Logan took another sip of his drink.

"Fucking…fine."

The mad had made it back to his group of friends. Wade broke from Logan's light hook on his suit and took two steps to close the gap. With a single downward motion, he slammed one of his wrist knives into the guy's shoulder. Nothing vital, but something that would hurt like a sonofabitch going in and coming out. The guy spun around, falling back against the hightop behind him.

"It was a joke!" he gasped. "Hundred bucks for whoever pretended to hit on you."

"Oh. So you have to pretend? Not hot enough for a truck-stop impulse buy Billy Ray Cyrus?"

Logan hooked his arm under Wade's. There was a stack of cash on the table; the payout for the bet. He snatched it and tucked it into his belt.

"Payment for me not letting him kick your asses," Logan growled. "Wade, let's go." He dragged him across the room.

"Consent motherfuckers!" Wade barked as Logan managed to wrestle him through the door. They stumbled out onto the sidewalk, something saccharine and poppy but tantalizingly addictive drifting from the neon-colored club across the road.

Their motel was right down the street, a planned walking distance.

"You good?" Logan asked, wrapping his arm around Wade's waist. He pulled away.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" he whined.

"With me ? What's wrong with you ?"

But Wade just huffed, taking off into the darkness.

It was going to be one of those nights.

"Like I just love how you see a man flirting with me, and you don't do anything."

There it was. It was two in the morning and Wade had been laying there next to him in their shitty motel bed, fuming silently. Logan had drifted into a very light sleep, but knew this was coming. He pressed his palms to his eyes and sat up a little, bed complaining under his weight.

"He wasn't actually flirting with you."

"You didn't know that when you came out of the bathroom. I didn't even know that. You just saw a guy with his hand on my thigh, and you didn't do anything."

Logan took a few deep breaths. Wade always worked from an internal logic. He just had to figure out what it was.

"I came over. I put my hand on you. Acted intimidatingly. He left without a fight." He tried to be measured without sounding condescending or sarcastic. They couldn't both be bad at this, and he was trying so hard. "What else would you have liked me to do?"

"Stab him in the face."

"I'm not going to go straight to stabbing if I can de-escalate. We de-escalated….until you stabbed him, I guess. We talked about this. Stab first and ask questions later is something I'm trying to move away from."

"No, okay. I get the little code of ethics and anger management routine you're stuck on. That's not the problem." Wade lifted his hands, gesticulating in the dark.

"Was there something I didn't see? Were you in danger that I didn't notice?"

"No! He was just some asshole." He was getting madder and madder, but this line of questioning was working. He was narrowing in on the actual problem. And even under the anger he could hear Wade forcing himself to work out his issue verbally. As frustrated as he was, he was still managing to peel away layers.

"Then I don't understand. What did you want me to do?"

"I wanted you to be mad!"

"I was upset."

"No!" He shot up in bed. "I want you to be so mad that a guy is touching me that you inflict massive bodily harm."

Logically, that wasn't going to happen. Yeah, he had sliced and diced for lesser things, but he was actively trying to not do that, now. Trying to rein it in. Create some fucking longevity instead of being ready to go out guns blazing at the next given opportunity.

But, holy fuck, maybe he actually saw what Wade was upset about.

"You want me to be jealous of other people showing you attention."

"Yes! Yes oh my god! Yes! Thank you. What is the point of having a super hot X-Men boyfriend with metal for fingers if he doesn't use them to scare other men away?"

"Is it just men?"

"What?"

"What if a woman hits on you?"

And that short-circuited him, body-slumping over to think.

"Okay, come on, lay back down." Logan opened his arms, and Wade crawled in obediently. He was a creature of habit if nothing else. "We'll talk about it more in the morning."

Wade nodded against his chest. He would either forget about it completely, or this was going to last for a week. Only the next day would tell.

#####

"Jelly bean, buy me this shirt."

"Why?"

"Because you love me."

"Well, yes. Obviously." Logan's hand found a place in the small of Wade's back as he leaned in for a closer look at the display through the window. "But you have literally a dozen shirts with that fucking cat on it. You don't need another one."

"Yeah, but this one has Kuromi." Wade swung around the archway into the store and made for the t-shirt wall, hoodie up, one hand in his pocket, the other around his drink. He didn't actually want anything. They had only stopped at the mall to grab some food and shake this black van that had been following them the past hour. Dragging The Wolverine into Hot Topic was just the top five funniest things of all time. He looked ridiculous in work boots and tight Levi's and t-shirt stretching taught over his chest

fucking stop it you're in public

I'm gonna tear that ass up later, though.

Logan was better at compartmentalizing his horniness and letting it all out at once in an appropriate place. Maybe that was part of the issue.

Because the bar thing was still needling at him.

They had resolved it last night. Logan understood why he was upset. He, in fact, went out of his way to try to understand why Wade was upset. That therapy shit was working. Maybe he ought to start going again. Because goddamn they were killing this whole communication business.

He watched Logan sip his fountain drink and gently flick through the metal grate of earrings. Logan pulled one off the display.

"You think Laura would like these?" he asked, showing them to Wade around the side of the grate. They were little bloody daggers that dangled, so yeah probably. One problem.

"They're one hundred percent her vibe, but her ears aren't pierced." Wade sipped on his bubble tea loudly. Logan stared at the earring card.

"They aren't?"

Wade leaned in to speak in a low voice. Fuck if he wasn't going to occasionally practice a modicum of decency in public.

"Remember when we were talking about dick piercings?"

"Right, healing factor." He slid the earrings back.

"That is some excellent fathering, right there."

"Shut the fuck up."

"If your daughter can't get piercings, you can order clip-on converters online." The girl came out of nowhere, anime shirt and baggy jeans and oh my god was scene hair coming back? She was with a small group, maybe seventeen or eighteen years old.

And all of them were staring at Logan as they milled around the store. Hungry eyes. Undressing him in their minds. He knew that look because he did it all the time. Only he was allowed to do it. These girls…these minors… weren't.

The rage was hotter than he expected. Like… a lot. Like if he had his guns on him, there would be a non-zero chance of brain and blood splatter across the Nightmare Before Christmas display.

"Shit. Okay." Logan pulled the earrings right back down then grabbed a few more sets, a variety of skulls and other cutesy depictions of deadly weaponry. "Did you actually want that t-shirt, babe?"

"No, I was just fuckin' with ya, honey bunny." The girls looked between them, taking in the implication of the exchange. Good.

Yeah, I get it. I look like a hairless cat in drag. But I'm the one that pulled that hottie. That ass belongs to me. That mouth? Around my dick. Conversations about our deepest fears and lingering traumas? Yeah, I'm the one he has those with.

That last one was the sexiest.

"Wade?" Logan was at the door, already checked out and shoving his wallet back into his jeans.

"Coming!" Wade shuffled back out through the door, glancing around the edge of his hood at the nearest girl.

Coming for me TONIGHT more like.

fuck, chill out, Wade

"You were giving that girl in there the evil eye," Logan said quietly, knocking his body against Wade's.

"She was making eyes at my boyfriend." Wade slipped his arm into Logan's forcefully. Logan chuckled.

"I think they were just being friendly. They saw a useless old man and tried to help."

"You cannot be this fucking dense, you immaculate asshole."

"I…okay…I'm flattered you think teen girls would be into me, but you might be a little biased."

"I'm certainly bi about that ass."

"That was a really bad one."

"They can't all be winners." Wade sucked down the last of his drink and tossed it in the trash as they passed. Logan reached over to do the same, and kissed Wade on the cheek in the process.

"Does it make you mad to think of other people being attracted to me?" Logan asked, fishing.

"Absolutely livid. If I so much as think about someone looking at you with a lustful gaze, it's like…flames…shooting…off the side of my face. And I think about it all the time. When we're out in public I just know that people are looking at you then looking at me and being like 'oh, the bar is in hell, I guess.' But I'm sensible enough to know this level of obsession isn't normal, so I haven't stabbed anyone. Yet."

"Hm, okay." Logan's voice settled into a cadence of contemplation.

no no no that makes me feel icky inside

"'Hm, okay' what? I don't like it when you think inside thoughts."

"I'm allowed to have those."

"Not around me you aren't."

"Jesus fuck, Wade. Okay." He moved them into a side hallway that led down to the bathrooms and other backside navigation. "I didn't understand why you were upset last night because I don't think the same way you do. I don't get mad about people hitting on you. I don't even really think about it. It's not something I worry about at all. So-"

"Why don't you think about it?" Wade shoved his hands in his pockets. There was that sick feeling. The one that lurked in the back of his head. That this was all temporary. A happiness that he wasn't allowed to have.

"That's what I'm getting to-"

"You don't think I'm attractive enough? That other people wouldn't look at me like that?"

"Wade-"

"I mean I get that I look like a piebald moose testicle-"

"Please don't do that-"

"-but to actually hear it from you."

Logan slapped his hands around Wade's shoulders.

"Wade, I-" Wade didn't hear the other side of the statement, his vision going suddenly black.

#####

Wade crumpled in front of him, and he only just managed to catch him as he fell.

The people in the black van had found them, but where the fuck were they? There were too many people here. He couldn't get a scent on them. No sound.

Something sharp bit into his neck and he slapped at it. Tiny blow dart. His vision swam, but it would take more than that to bring him down, the healing factor working immediately to purge it. Another one caught him in the middle of his back. Where the fuck was it coming from? He scrabbled along his own spine, trying to pry the dart out while still holding Wade against him. This one had more of a punch, and the sway started overtaking him.

No.

This was a bullshit way to go out.

He hit his knee, bringing Wade down with him.

"Wade…wake up. Fucking heal already." But then he felt his body fumble and fall into blackness.

"They're waking up. Dose them again."

"These motherfuckers are heavy."

Ropes around the wrist and knees. Laying in the back of a van. Moving down the highway fast. Another bite on the ankle and the world faded again.

"Hey, pookie bear, wake up." Something bonked lightly into the back of his skull.

"Fuck." He startled back into consciousness. They were tied up back to back on chairs in a dark, nondescript room. "Oh this is stupid as fuck. Are these the people we stole the data from?"

"Probably," Wade said idly. There was a one-way window to his left, and he looked at Wade in the reflection. He was slumped a little but alert.

Logan tested how he had been tied to the chair. It was tight. Something stronger than it looked. Any old asshole could get adamantium and vibranium and all that shit, anymore. He flung out a claw, but the angle was wrong to do a direct cut. Together they should be fine to get out, though. Wade had a dozen knives on him at any given moment.

"Alright. What's our plan?" Logan asked.

"What do you mean you don't worry about people hitting on me?"

"Are we really doing this, right now?"

"We've got time!"

"Gentlemen. You're awake." A nondescript man dressed in black sauntered in through a gray metal door. A pair of bolt cutters were slung over his arm. This was one of those kinds of sessions.

"Can this wait?" Wade asked with a pout. "We were in the middle of a relationship altering conversation."

This gave the man a bit of a pause, but he kept moving slowly, circling around to Wade.

"Now, I recognize some professionals when I see them. So I'll cut to it quickly." He tapped the bolt cutter to Wade's hand. "Who sent you to steal from me?" He poised the cutter over Wade's pinky.

"Bruh," Wade tsked. "I don't fucking know. Logie, my question."

"Wade, honey. Please pay attention to what's happening, right now." Logan wriggled their lashed together chairs.

"Oh what's he gonna do, take a finger?"

And he did, the cutter moving through Wade's pinky with a crack and squish. Wade jerked with the pain, but moved right back into the conversation.

"I need an answer, Logan."

"Christ," Logan muttered. "No you're not conventionally attractive. Okay? So realistically I wouldn't expect you to get hit on by randos compared to, I don't know, fuckin' Ryan Reynolds."

"AHA! I THOUGHT SO!" The chairs jumped with his movement.

"But that's not the point, goddamnit. I think you're hot as fuck, and that's all that should matter. I'm the only attention you should care about."

"Oh. Hm." Wade rocked their chairs a little.

"Okay, as adorable as this is, I still have my own questions." Bolt cutter guy positioned the thing over Wade's next finger. "Who are you working for?."

"Your mother," Wade replied. "She hired me after I was done blowing her back out then providing appropriate after care."

The sound of the crunch on his next finger got lost under Wade's next complaint.

"So you wouldn't be mad if someone tried to pick me up in a bar?"

"No…not really...Because you're going home with me, in the end."

"I really need an answer to my questions, so let me remind you," bolt-cutter said.

CRUNCH.

"Okay, that one fucking hurt a little," Wade said then turned back to the window to look at Logan in the reflection. "So you just…don't care? You don't care if some drunk dude slides his hands down my pants."

"I don't understand what's happening here," bolt cutter guy said.

CrUncH?

"I know that if some drunk guy slides his hands down your pants, he's not going home with a hand, Wade. If he goes home at all. So, yeah, I'll be mad that you had to go through something like that, and take revenge as needed, but I know you'll fucking deal with it. You're supposed to be the one I don't have to worry about." He hadn't said it out loud. It felt like too much pressure to put on the relationship. But now things were getting dire.

cr-u-n-ch

"What the fuck does that mean?" Wade tried spinning, but he was stopped by the strapping on the chair.

"I swear to God…" Bolt cutter guy started moving away, but Logan was too focused on Wade in the reflection to keep tracking him.

"Everyone I love dies. Or gets converted to sapient space dust. Or didn't actually exist because the memory was implanted by some asshole. You just lost five fingers and still have the energy to bitch at me. I don't have to worry if my claws come out at the wrong time around you. If anything, you like it."

"I do. I'll admit that."

"I don't have to worry about you 24/7. I don't have to constantly think about how I'm going to protect you or if I can rescue you in time if a merc job goes wrong. Because you can take care of yourself. I can just breathe and focus on just being a person. Being a couple. Because I know you're going to come home at the end of the day."

"Maybe I want to be saved, sometimes." Wade squirmed in the chair, trying to get his face around to Logan's shoulder. "Maybe I don't want to have to take care of myself and let someone else do it. Maybe I'm also tired of having to protect everyone that I Iove all the time from goddamn mystical, world-ending bullshit. It's literally the reason I came and got you. To help me. So that I wouldn't have to do it alone. Maybe I don't want to have to carry that weight all the time either. It's too heavy."

"Fuck," Logan sighed. "You're right. I get what you're saying. Let's take some time after this to work it out."

"Maybe you stab a barista that smiles at me too long."

"We'll circle back to that."

"You people are fucking insane." They both jumped, briefly forgetting bolt cutter guy was there. "But I still need my answers. So maybe I switch gears." He moved from Wade to Logan, and tapped the circle of blade to Logan's hand.

"Oh, no, those little piggies are mine, " growled Wade.

With the disgusting crunch of a dislocated shoulder and elbow, Wade managed to wriggle out of the bindings around his arms.

"Could you do that the whole time?" Logan asked.

"We were having a conversation," Wade replied.

Loose from the bindings, he had enough space to pull the knife from the hidden space in the pocket of his hoodie and swing it hard into the side of bolt cutter guy. These idiots hadn't fully patted him down. Rookie mistake.

The bolt cutter guy had thought this would go his way. He didn't have a backup plan beyond screaming about the knife now in his pancreas, swinging the cutter around in a panic. This left plenty of time for Wade to reach down and break the chair legs free of the base. This didn't release the bindings around his ankles, but he could walk. He snapped his joints back into place with a series of cracks.

"Who the fuck are you people?" Bolt-cutter backed up against the wall.

"You really don't know? Holy shit." Wade pulled the knife free. With the force of that he lost his grip on the bolt-cutters.

Wade sliced down through the bindings keeping Logan to the chair.

"I'm Deadpool, and that's the goddamn Wolverine."

The bolt cutter guy reared back to swing the cutters, aiming for Wade's head with the rest of his strength.

Logan was as fast as Wade, ripping free from the chair, claws coming out in the time he crossed the room. A single movement up through his ribs, and bolt cutter guy dropped like a rock. They stared down at him, both covered in splatters of his blood.

"How much do you actually want to fight your way out of here?" Logan sighed.

"My swords and guns are in the car, so it won't be nearly as fun." Wade leaned against the wall, wiping his knife on his hoodie.

"Thinking the same thing." Logan moved toward the one-way window. Someone had to be on the other side. He tapped on the glass with the tip of his claw. "You got ten minutes, and we're busting through that door. We will be leaving. You decide what that looks like. This is the chance you get to go home to your kids tonight."

Wade sidled up to him, slipping his arms around Logan's waist.

"I've…uh…I've lost a little more blood than I realized."

Logan went to the bottom of his shirt and ripped strips away.

"Give them here," Logan said. "Wrap your hand while I see where your fingers got to." He wandered back to the chair, searching the floor.

"You don't have to do that, chicken tender."

"It's faster, right? And they're all right here." Logan scooped them up from the floor. "Pretty clear cut. What fucking brand are these?" Logan also grabbed the bolt cutters, throwing them over his shoulder. "See if this brand makes hedge clippers." He held the fingers out to Wade.

"Why the fuck are you thinking about hedge clippers, right now?"

"The bush in front of the main window is too tall."

Wade held the first of the fingers in place, waiting for it to attach.

"I thought the kids on landscape duty took care of that."

"They just run the riding mower. We do the hedges and edging. Well, I do. You haven't done shit."

"Ohh, when I get all these fingers back on we should do some edging." Wade bit his bottom lip as he worked on the next finger.

"Hilarious."

"Wait, who put in the dog-run for Puppins? I assumed that was one of the kids." He had made it through all his fingers but didn't dare stretch them, yet.

"That was me. Laura helped."

"Oh…thank you. That was nice." Wade pecked Logan on the cheek.

"Those fuckin' zoomies…" But Logan didn't know what the rest of that sentence looked like and just sort of vaguely mimicked the act of running with his fingers. The crackle of a speaker came from somewhere above them, and a voice blared out.

"Okay, you might talk a big game, but if you think you're getting out of here-BLACHT"

The voice through the speaker cut off violently with a wet, choking sound. Splatty and gross. Wade jumped against Logan with surprise at the scream, clutching Logan's chest with his still healing hands.

"Oh. Wait. It's the X-Men." Wade set his head against Logan's shoulder. "No big deal." Wade knocked on the window. "We're in here, you sexy little spandex aficionados." Logan slapped his hand from the window.

"It could also be someone more annoying to deal with, and we just lost our escape window."

"Oh, no, it's totally them. I have a microtransponder in my shoe that I set off when I woke up here. These people did not pat us down well, at all."

"You have a transponder…in your shoe…"

"Mhm. They don't want to lose you as an asset, so if you come with me on a job, I have to wear it. But I also wasn't supposed to tell you. Oops."

"How long were you awake before me?" Logan canted his head toward Wade, pieces coming together now that the tranquilizer was working its way out completely.

"A while. Ran my mouth at them so they'd torture me first. Figured I hold out longer than you. Also…you know…Don't like other people putting sharp things in you."

"Wade," Logan sighed. The bolt on the door cachunked , and Logan spun, claws clicking out.

"Hallo! Please don't kill me." A furry blue hand slipped out the gap between the door and the wall and wiggled its fingers.

"Kurt, holy shit." The door swung open and Logan met Nightcrawler across the room. They shared a quick hug. "You haven't been at the mansion."

"Business to attend to." He leaned around Logan. "Good to properly meet you Wade. Bad circumstances." Logan turned. Wade had gone a bit slackjawed, thinking. He snapped back, grinning.

"Let's get the fuck out of here, huh?"

#####

I didn't like it. I didn't like him hugging the little blue man.

Wade, what the fuck is wrong with you? He's known them longer than you.

I guess technically not, because it's not actually the same Nightcrawler. But conceptually he has. Fucking hate this multiverse shit.

Just need to get my hands on him to feel better.

Get my fingers in his flesh.

The Blackbird might have swooped in to save them, but the team wasn't actually done with whatever weird little diplomatic mission they were on. Wade had been told that if he left the plane he would suffer dire consequences. Logan could join them if he wanted.

He didn't.

Suck my dick, X-Men. Logan keeps choosing me.

Why am I in goddamn competition with the entire X-Men?

"Wade, you stopped talking." They were in the cargo hold. Logan was doing arms and ammunition inventory. Wade was cleaning the rifles. It was something to keep them busy.

"You always tell me to shut up."

Logan turned sharply.

"Then I won't do that anymore. I don't actually like it when you're quiet for too long. It means you're upset about something." Logan moved across the cargo hold and dropped in front of him on the floor.

Wade put the rifle parts he was cleaning back in the bag and shoved them to the side. He opened his arms and that was the cue for Logan to crawl into his lap. He rolled forward over his knees and nestled his head into the pillow of Wade's crossed legs. Wade ran his fingers through Logan's bangs and combed them up over his crown.

"I'm still thinking about the bar thing and the torture chamber stuff. I'm not mad, though." Wade waved his hands a little to shake off that presumption. "Just trying to sort myself and why I felt the way I did. And I'm not quite there, yet. I'll get it together, eventually."

"I'm not stabbing any baristas."

"Just a little pokey poke if her hand lingers on mine and we share an unexpected moment?"

"I'll compromise by severing the ACL of the next waiter who laughs at your jokes just to get a bigger tip."

"Oh wait. No let them flirt for, like, one minute. Then crck. " He gestured across his throat with the back of his thumb. Logan chuckled, then his eyes flicked in thought.

"To be perfectly clear, I'm not actually going to do that. However, I will have a bigger reaction to you getting hit on, and I will include minor threats of violence if they're being handsy. If that's something that makes you feel good about yourself."

"Eh. I don't know why I'm making such a big deal about flirting in a bar, anyway. Not like it's a regular occurrence. Mach speed blobfish isn't exactly a look that gets a lot of play."

"Hey." Logan reached up and poked him hard in the cheeks. "What have I told you about insulting my boyfriend?"

"Self-deprecation is the foundation of my comedic genius, sugar bean. Take that from me, and I lose half my material."

He's so pretty like this. Deep, creased laugh lines. Little crinkle between his eyebrows. Long nose.

Wade ran his hands down Logan's jaw. Then he leaned down and kissed him upside down.

Spiderman style.

Wade pulled back just enough to talk.

"I don't actually need or even want you to protect me. You clearly need me to protect you, though."

"Oh, what makes you say that?" Logan reached up to peck him on the lips.

"I'm the one with a radio in my shoe."

"That they forced you to wear."

"That I was clever enough to actually wear when they told me to instead of…not…doing that…" Wade ran his hands down Logan's chest, studying the place where he'd reattached his fingers only a few hours before. There was still a thin line as the flesh continued to knit itself together. He sat back up a little, drawing his hands back to Logan's temples.

"So neither of us want to carry the weight of the world," Wade said with a drifting hum. "But we worked together on that TimeSplitter motherfucker, and we saved all of reality." Logan curled his hand over the top of Wade's.

"And we did it holding hands." Logan brought Wade's hand to his lips and kissed his palm.

"Fucking gross. When did we get this disgustingly cute?"

Logan lifted his hands to catch the sides of Wade's head.

"I've always been cute, you just had to catch up." He pulled Wade down to kiss him. He broke the kiss too soon, and Wade was about to complain before Logan turned over on his knees. He moved Wade's legs to part around him.

Oh ?

Logan hooked his thumb around the zipper of Wade's jeans and drew it down.

Yep.

His lips pressed to Wade's bulge through his boxers. He nosed open the fly and brought Wade's cock into his mouth, tongue running small circles over the tip. Wade wove his fingers through Logan's hair, locking into place, steadying himself against Logan's rhythm.

Logan Logan Logan

The refrain started up like it always did, a rattle that snaked around his brain and wiped everything else away. When Logan was touching him, he stopped thinking. He just was . He just existed as body and sensation. As nerve endings and neurochemicals.

Words that were already stupid became more senseless, that part of his brain going on autopilot.

"Take me deeper, daddy."

God, why the fuck did I say that?

Logan obliged, though, pushing into him until Wade's cock was brushing the back of his throat. His fingers went tighter in Logan's half-curls..

Sweet baby Jesus, this man is going to kill me.

#####

Wade's dick was rough, calloused like the rest of his skin. He loved it. Every time he put his mouth on Wade in some form or fashion, he fell a little more in love. In love with Wade's body. His form. In love with the pulse and beat of breath underneath.

Every time Wade talked, even when he spiraled out into nonsense, Logan found himself falling a little farther down into him. It was becoming harder and harder to imagine the version of himself that had hated him. That grew rabid with rage at his voice.

Now? He wanted to devour him. He had spent so many years suppressing his rage just for it to explode and destroy everything at the exact wrong moment. He'd spent every moment since then trying to prevent something like that from ever happening again. Even if it didn't mean anything. Even if it didn't matter. And he'd almost done it. He'd packed every emotion away into the deepest part of himself and drowned it so he'd never have to feel anything.

Then this motherfucker opened everything up again. And it became a tumult, emotions crashing over each other.

He tucked his hands up under Wade's shirt, pressing his thumbs into Wade's stomach as he took him deeper. All the way to the back of his throat. The friction of his jeans on his own erection was bringing him to a mini-climax as he ground on Wade's shin.

It rose like an ember, tensing his hands. Wade moved one hand out of his hair to touch his knuckles.

"Let the claws out if you want, peanut. No organs, please."

The double sensation of Wade in his mouth and the dry, half-orgasm was enough to overwhelm him after the day so far, and he lost control of himself before he could change his hand shape. The claws came out his palms, instead, digging into Wade's lovehandles.

It hurt like fuck, but Wade's shiver underneath him was worth it.

#####

And he might as well kill me now, because I'm already in heaven.

He clenched around the blades in his side, trying to focus on both the pinpricks of pain and the center of pleasure rising in his pelvis, wallowing in the combined rush of dopamine and endorphins.

There was the tiniest puff of sound somewhere toward the front of the jet. Through his haze of ecstasy, Wade found a way to focus his attention in that general direction.

Kurt.

He had realized what was happening mid pulling a bag down from the rack and froze. Wade lifted a finger to his lips and gestured violently with a throw of his head for him to leave. At the same time, Logan took a particularly long drag on him, drawing an absolutely unearthly sound out of Wade's body.

Kurt puffed out of existence.

That'll learn ya.

Fuck. Shit. Logan Logan

Distraction gone, his brain started shutting down again.

Logan Logan Logan

"Logan," he whispered, the sound barely forming around his lips. Logan pulled away, and Wade almost cried. Logan looked up at him through his lashes, keeping his lips barely half an inch away from the tip of Wade's cock.

"If you're going to say my name, say it properly instead of so quietly you think I can't hear you." He kissed the head. "Because I always do. Every time." He took him in again.

"Logan," Wade moaned. The moan turned to a whine as his stomach and pelvis went alight, his toes curling his shoes, tension breaking around his body. He came hard in Logan's mouth, pulling his face against his body until Logan's nose was touching where his pubic hair used to be.

He released his hands with a hard sigh and gasp, falling back against one of the bulkheads. Logan pulled back, cum and spit creating a bridge between Wade's cock and Logan's lips. He lifted up, pressing those messy lips to Wade's

"I need to do you," Wade panted into Logan's mouth.

"I'm fine," Logan said.

"Did you come in your pants, ground bear?" Wade grinned.

"No," Logan said, but there was a shade of embarrassment.

He totally did.

There was a clanging knock on the access hatch on the side into the cargo hold. Storm's voice followed.

"Entering the ship!"

"Good timing," Logan said, zipping up Wade's pants. "Imagine if they were just a few minutes earlier."

"Hahahah yeah."

Oops.

#####

Logan stood on the back porch, shirtless, letting Puppins out for her last romp of the night. The cherry red of his cigar burned out against the night sky and the glow of the mansion up the lawn.

No smoking indoors, and Wade didn't really like the smell. So he'd reduced the frequency considerably. The booze, too. He hadn't felt the need to drink nearly as often, but it was never going away completely. After the last few days, for example, a high quality scotch and a cigar did just the trick.

His phone buzzed on the side table, and he picked it up. It was Kurt. All Logan read was the word " Entschuldige" before his phone blew up with text messages from everyone on the team.

"Babe," he called back into the house. "Are emojis the same in this timeline?"

Wade drifted into the open doorway in just boxers and his off-brand Barbie hoodie that was printed off-center.

"What the fuck are you talking about, happy feet?"

Logan held up his phone to give him a better look.

"I just got a whole lot of text messages, but they're all just an eggplant, a knife, and a plane. I don't know what that means."

Wade's nostrils flared.

"Oh, I have another little German man to kill."

#poolverine #deadclaws #deadpool x wolverine #smut #fanfiction

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