#like it's a subculture and deserves as much respect as any religion

[skewl4kewl]

TASK 2 : What has Influenced me? 

The question, “what has influenced me?” is a vast one, and is hard to articulate and objectively define what exactly has moulded me into the person that I am today. The sheer multitude of varying factors that shape an individual throughout different crucial stages in one’s life is hard to pinpoint, however has everything to do with the environment in which one grows up in both at home and in public.  Living in Canada, specifically Vaughan Ontario, is a wonderful place for people to grow up and develop a fully intact, multi-faceted sense of self. Since Ontario is Canada’s most multicultural province, we as a community are truly blessed to be living in such a highly functioning cultural mosaic full of diverse food, fashion, entertainment, architecture and leisure activities. Looking back at my elementary school days, growing up & attending a French immersion public school as the child of Immigrant parents from the former state of Yugoslavia, I was very blessed to have friends from every continent on the earth. As a child I wasn’t aware of the cultural differences, since most if not all of my friends were born in Canada, and were mainly socialized by the Canadian public school system, but having those relationships as a young child embedded the belief that no matter what religion, race or orientation one may possess, we are all equal and deserve to be treated with the same respect as we navigated our way through the education system. My time on this earth has shown me that we can all peacefully and seamlessly co-exist and create meaningful life-long friendships as we build and ameliorate our community with unconventional and creative ideas that have its origins not only within conventional Canadian society, but foreign societies overseas and elsewhere. Since every individual person has a unique personality, distinct tastes and likes/dislikes, knowing there was a plethora of diverse ideologies, traditions and arts available for me to take a liking to and then subsequently express was profoundly important as it enabled me to see a bit of myself in each of the different things I was inclined towards. This allowed me to  view the world from a lenses of interconnectedness, to see the similarities between all the diverse cultures, religions and walks of life around the world, it reinforced the notion of unity and common humanity.

 The specifics into my journey surround exposing myself to different subcultures via leisure activities, starts with me identifying with the movements of Feminism and Veganism. These 2 ideologies massively shifted the way in which I viewed the world. Feminism has been around for a long time, but the oppression of women has existed longer, and thus the idea has yet to be fully realized on a global scale. We here in the west are blessed because our government fully embraces the notion of equality between the genders, however there are still spots in society that unconsciously allow for systemic gender based discrimination, which I had first hand experience with unfortunately as a young teenager coming of age. I began to defy gender presentation norms, embracing body hair and rejecting the female beauty standard dictated by our respective society as a means to protest the status-quo which perpetuates the marginalization of women. Veganism came as a result of becoming good friends with a vegan at school and admiring her mindful, compassionate and empathic demeanor as she interacted with other students and faculty. Veganism is the practice of abstaining from the use of animal products, particularly in diet, and an associated philosophy that rejects the commodity status of animals. A follower of the diet or the philosophy is known as a vegan. Beginning to view all forms of life as sentient and able to feel pain and express emotion was the first step in becoming a more mindful and compassionate person, which allowed me increase my own self-awareness in order to perpetually grow and learn from the lessons life incessantly throws. In high school I was also exposed to different art forms such as intuitive painting and drawing as a means to de-stress and relieve my social anxiety and discovered that “art” doesn’t need to look any which way, and whatever comes up on the canvas is a direct reflection of what you need to let out. Art as a form of creation was very helpful for me as I began to experiment with creating jewelry, to know that I was able to focus my energy and creative vision enough to make a tangible piece of wearable jewelry was very empowering and showed me that I had the capacity to create things in the real world.  Living in a free market society also spawned a multitude of different businesses with it’s origins steeped in foreign cultural traditions and ideologies. I am grateful that my friend took me to a yoga studio when I said I wanted to work out. This experience opened up a whole new world to me, one in which I felt good not only physically but mentally as well, and with the implementation of a steady yogic practice this was the first step that catalyzed me in creating my won tradition which prioritized developing self awareness. As this self awareness and mindfulness grew, I  began to understand that I was capable of accomplishing anything if I just focused my time and energy toward the direction of what I wanted. It allowed me to understand that everything I needed or seeked, was already within me, and in order to achieve my goals and desires all I needed to do was create a firm connection to myself which fostered firm belief IN myself. This was PIVOTAL.

  Living in Vaughan, which is right beside Brampton, I grew up with many friend who were Sikh, and I remember growing up and going over to their houses to be greeted by their warm mothers who offered me the most delectable, nutritious and vegan/vegetarian foods. I developed a fascination in how the women adorned their bodies like temples with the fashion they chose to wear, and eventually made the decision to visit India to do a Yoga Teacher training and to just develop a deeper appreciation for all the country has given throughout time. As I immersed myself in eastern philosophy’s and sister-practices related to yoga like Ayurveda and Vedic meditation, I developed a very fond appreciation for Asian culture, more specifically for the multitude of spiritual gifts bestowed to humanity from India.  I travelled to India to understand the origins of the ideas, rituals and traditions that framed the culture I connected with so deeply, and began to study the history of the country, which allowed me to understand my own respective culture with a more accepting lens. During my travels I was amazed and floored by the religious architecture, knowing that they were so old, yet such intricate pieces of functional art. I can say with confidence that my #1 leisure activity now is yoga and meditation, it provides so much soothing solace and relaxation and t re-sets me back to a space within myself where I feel completely at ease , without any anxiety attached to who I am, simply just being. I still enjoy the simple things in life as a means of entertainment, hanging out with my favourite friends and family, playing board games, hiking through new trails as I embark on journeys throughout Ontario with my friends, waking up early, enjoying a cup of tea and a good book, staying up late and talking about what scares me the most with my friends, just the small sweet free things that make your relationships forge a stronger/deeper bond, having a really tight knit sound support system is the most important thing in my life, and funnily enough is the things that brings me the most joy and fun in life.

 So what has influenced me, at the end of the day I can say a lot of good and bad things have influenced me, I believe this can be applied to most people as we all have been influenced and propagated by false notions via the media and school systems. However the distinction here is, what has made the most lasting impact on who I am as a person and my character. I believe those experiences have afforded me the ability to assess what social norm, rules and values serve the person that I am and strive to be, and what societal norms, rules and values do not serve a purpose and stifle my ability at self-realization and fully asserting my own autonomous sense of self in the world, regardless of the reaction i may receive as a result of defying or adhering to these societal rules. The moments in which I was exposed to different ways of doing things that deviated away from our Canadian societal norms, sometimes reflected my own culture of origin, and sometimes vehemently opposed it via lifestyle, ideology, food, fashion, architecture, tradition and overall belief systems. These were important moments because it forced me to objectively be introspective about my own belief systems that were fueling my behaviours at the time,  and to justly turn said belief systems on their heads in order to gain an alternate perspective so I could understand what true empathy and a total sense of compassion and understanding that sometimes what we need is the exact opposite of what we want. Sometimes what we require the most for our own growth, are the experiences that place us directly in a position of discomfort. We’d rather choose the devils (complacency, comfort, convenience)  we know then put ourselves out there in foreign situations for the possibility of meeting the angel we deserve.

[north-of-annwn]

Heathen Values

Something to remember when making friends with other Heathens are Heathen Values (or Virtues). Heathenry is a subculture with specific differences to the culture today. 

Differences: 

Boasting is normal Never shame or take offense to someone bragging, boasting, or being proud of an accomplishment or talent. This is normal among heathens and is not considered rude. Pride is not something to be ashamed of in Heathen Halls or circles.  In this same note, no one will be impressed by feigned humility or self-deprecation. If someone compliments you, accept it gracefully rather than arguing that you aren’t worthy. In addition, it is inappropriate to wave away thanks with comments like “it’s nothing”. If you are clearly going out of your way to do something for someone else and they say thank you, accept their thanks. You may add “you are welcome” or “I am happy to do it”, but do not dismiss it. 

Be Careful with Your Word In Heathen culture your word is your oath. Whether you are attesting to someone else’s character, making plans, making a commitment, it is the same as swearing an oath or making a promise. Today, people don’t think much about cancelling plans, going back on a commitment, or even gossip. It’s almost normal today to not be able to count on anyone’s word without a Contract or an RSVP, and even the latter is subject to “a good reason” in the mind of the person promising. Heathens do not take this lightly. Do not commit to things or make plans if you are unsure, do not say you will do something and then change your mind. And most definitely do not say something about someone else unless you are sure it is true. Oaths and Honor are entwined in Heathen culture, and if someone finds that your words don’t account for much, or you seem to “change your mind” often then you most likely will not be given much respect or trust.  This is very different in comparison with our modern culture. And mistakes could keep you from making friends or being trusted within the Kindred.  Respect and/or Insults For Heathens respect is earned, not automatically given. Now, respect, and human decency are different things for the concept of this discussion. All humans deserve to be treated as having a right to exist and have basic human inalienable rights. Respect is something else - and means to hold someone in high esteem. It means you believe they are an Honorable person, you trust their word and you find them capable. This does not come just by existing, and others must recognize this with time. And you must earn it with your character by demonstrating that you exhibit the virtues valued by the Kindred.  Likewise, insulting someone should not be done flippantly. Today, it is normal to sling insults for fun, for drama, or just because you like insulting others. But among Heathens insults are not taken lightly. Our ancestors might have solved an insult with the sword. To insult someone without proof of your words was to risk your life. Today, you may not risk your life, but you do risk your own reputation among the Kindred. Heathens do not appreciate insults, whether directed at them or another of their Kindred. I also would not put it past a Heathen to deck their insulter. ;) Either way, be careful with demanding respect you have not yet earned, or insulting others. You won’t make friends easily this way. (Friendly insults over drinks is something entirely different... and you should know the difference before deciding to deliver)

Forgiveness Here’s a tricky concept in Heathenry. Our culture sees Forgiveness from a Christian standpoint. And more often than not it is normal to hear it suggested that forgiveness should be handed out to those who have wronged us whether they are remorseful of their actions or not. Forgiveness is such a HUGE part of Christianity that it has shaped Western Culture as well: “To err is human, to forgive Divine” and all that. It’s also a concept that exists in many peaceloving religions like Taoism and Buddhism. Heathens just don’t see it the same way. Like respect, forgiveness must be earned. And forgiveness is a good deal harder to earn than respect. More often than not, Heathens will “let it go”, or consider it “water under the bridge” rather than offer forgiveness. Perhaps it’s pride, perhaps it is because a Heathen sees forgiveness as permission to be wronged again in the same way. This really was not the way our ancestors handled things however. Personally, I have redefined western culture’s idea of forgiveness as “being able to let go a wrong”, “to not be burdened by someone else’s betrayal or mistake” any longer.” In modern times more and more people are starting to redefine forgiveness as these things. But really it’s an extension of a much older mindset. Heathens do not often hand out forgiveness. It is not expected, and just because someone is “sorry” does not necessarily earn them back their honor in another’s eyes. The slate is not automatically whiped clean (like in christianity) with an apology. This is another reason you must watch your actions and your words.  Storytelling and “Big Fish” Storytelling is also a huge part of heathenry. Like our ancestors we love a good tale. It is quite normal for someone who is Heathen to launch into a lengthy recount of a personal story for entertainment or laughs. No one sees it as a time waster, and you should not find yourself bored (unless the person is a lousy storyteller, and even then... try to look interested). These stories may come in succession - when one person finished, another person might begin theirs immediately. While LONG stories aren’t necessarily normal in western culture anymore, they most definitely will be found when hanging out with kindred. Moreover, tales often get stretched, altered, and embellished with each telling to be funnier and more memorable. These are not really seen as “lies” but amusing tales. It is also quite normal for one “Big Fish” story to follow another as each in the party try to “one up” the other. It’s all in good fun. But DON’T EVER cut someone off in their tale to insert your own, and never shut them down as being disinterested or as if you have something better to do. To do so is extremely insulting. 

If anyone has some more to add, go right ahead. :) 

[tanadrin]

I have just finished reading White Mughals, William Dalrymple’s prequel-of-sorts to The Last Mughal. The main events take place about sixty years before, and concern the relationship between the British Resident at the court of Hyderabad, James Achilles Kirkpatrick, and a Muslim woman of Persian descent whom he fell in love with and married, Khair un-Nissa; the way Dalrymple talks it up in the early chapters you think this might be a historical drama with Shakespeare-level tragedy and revenge, but it’s not (though it does end sadly). Mostly, it’s an excuse for Dalrymple to talk about the politics of Hyderabad and south India, to discuss fascinating personalities like Abdul Latif Shushtari, Khair’s Persian cousin who comes to India to make his fortune (and spends the entire time complaining about Indian Muslims, Indian Hindus, the weather, Americans, the British, and the food), and, above all, the cultural moment between the East India Company establishing a solid foothold in the subcontinent and the creation of a sharp cultural line between India and Britain in which it was possible to inhabit a world that was simultaneously of Europe and of India.

There seems to be a period, of indeterminate length of time--perhaps the 1750s to the 1820s or 30s?--when it was perfectly ordinary for a British man, born in Europe or the colonies, to be able to go to India in the service of the Company to make his fortune, to marry an Indian woman (or women, especially if he converted to Islam), to adopt Indian dress and language and habits, and to have children who were as much part of the Mughal aristocratic class as they were of the British aristocratic class or immediately sub-aristocratic stratum. Certain economic incentives worked against a thorough mixing of the cultures. The British presence in India was overwhelmingly male, the women being either wives of officers or high-ranking Company officials or, occasionally, single women seeking eligible husbands (though the stuffier European sexual morality meant that they often struggled to compete with Indian women for the men’s affection). European women were not, as a rule, to be found among the fortune-seekers and adventurers who made their way to India, but there were a couple of notable exceptions, and there are even recorded cases of European women being recruited to Indian harems. Indian wives also very often did not return to Britain with their husbands, but mostly this seems to be because the sorts of European men who married Indian women ultimately preferred to live out the rest of their lives in India, their health permitting. People like David Ochterlony, the Resident at Delhi, amassed large fortunes and settled down quite happily with their families to live out their days in India; many were buried there, in tombs which merge European and Indian architectural styles.

And some officials, like Kirkpatrick, eventually became skeptical of the whole colonial project. When Richard Wellesly (brother to the more famous Arthur) became the Governor-General of India, he initiated a program of expanding the empire’s reach in India pretty much for its own sake, rather than out of any notion of commercial or enterprising spirit. The result was that Residents like Kirkpatrick were told to get the princes they advised to sign unequal treaties by any means necessary, and that vast quantities of blood and treasure were expended on unnecessary wars. Someone like Kirkpatrick, who regarded the Nizam of Hyderabad and his court with as much respect as he would any European prince, and indeed counted many of them among his friends, resisted such wasteful conquest, and saw, quite correctly, that even if Britain managed to establish hegemony over the subcontinent through such means, it would come at a terrible cost.

I like this book for two reasons. One, it offers another view of colonialism, one which is rarely discussed. First, the East India Company was, well, a company, and there were moments in its history when you could almost believe it did indeed operate in a morally neutral if mercantile fashion, not intentionally as an agent of destructive colonization. It is a reminder that history is big and complicated and never as simple as we would like to believe, and that even if broadly destructive trends do exist, there are good people on both sides of them, who deserve to be remembered. More importantly, if your view of the British in far-flung places is uniformly as grim, badly-dressed-for-the-climate, gin-and-tonic-swilling colonial overlords, this book offers a dozen named examples (and many more) of British people who showed up in India, quite liked what they saw, and discarded large chunks of their own Britishness to embrace cultures and peoples they fell in love with. Informed as he is by both English-language and Indian (Persian and Urdu and Deccani) sources, Dalrymple is the opposite of Kipling: for him, all cultures are united by their common humanity, even if they exhibit, especially in this time period, dizzying diversity. There is a fantastic episode late in the book where Kirkpatrick’s daughter, Katherine Aurora “Kitty” Kirkpatrick (born Noor un-Nissa, Sahib Begum), by now grown and educated in England, reconnects with her maternal grandmother, Sharaf un-Nissa. The two write a series of emotional letters to one another, both immensely gratified and moved to be reconnecting with beloved family after so many years and the death of Khair. Kitty Kirkpatrick writes in a familiar style--the pleasantries and emotional language and turns of phrase of an Austen character, and Sharaf writes with all the flourishes and religious allusions of an Indian Muslim noblewoman, and yet their clear and evident love for one another, and their powerful familial bond, is what shines through the letters above all. These are two women of utterly different cultural contexts and backgrounds, yet who clearly regard one another as close family, as close as family can possibly be.

This is maybe why I don’t worry much about concepts like cultural appropriation, and why I find it hard to get worked up over the idea that any kind of real harm is perpetuated by one group adopting the superficial elements of other cultural or subcultural groups. In reality, the borders we have drawn between cultures (and races, and nations, and any other kind of human tribe) are of a shockingly recent invention. It was not until the 1830s and 40s, with the arrival of Wellesley’s successors in India--bright-eyed Evangelical protestants, the first generation of Anglicans really committed to the notion that the Church of England wasn’t just a franchise of Catholicism that let the monarch run things, and reform-minded, forward thinking, science-oriented racists with shiny new ideas about the inherent qualities of different human populations, that the dividing lines between the British and the Indians were really drawn. This is when the number of marriages between British men and Indian women begins to decrease; when the British Residents at Hyderabad begin to see the Nizam as their subject, and not as their partner, when British presence in India becomes more about the Empire than about the Company. This, I suspect, is when Indianness begins to develop in opposition to Britishness, laying the groundwork for a unified idenity and a pan-Indian nationalism a hundred years later. And while I don’t want to knock that achievement--in any other part of the world, there’s no way Gujarat and Delhi and Kerala and West Bengal would be part of one country without nationalism and terrorism and ethnic tension--even on the left as we pay lip service to ideas like open borders and mundialization we take it as read that you have your culture and I have mine, and only under certain very narrow and respectful conditions are you allowed to approach mine and sample from it. If you are allowed at all.

I reject this. It is nationalism by another name; it’s certainly tribalism, and an enforced tribalization, and while yes, it’s possible to disprespect and denigrate other cultures in ways that are deeply hurtful and deeply harmful, and possible to cause offense where homage is intended, using the shrinking terror of causing such harm to throw up walls between cultures and subcultures is far more harmful than accidental offense given where none was intended. The history of a place like India--and, of course, Britain--is the history of cultural contact, of the horizontal and vertical mixing of religions and values and arts and languages. We should embrace this. When you spend time embedded in another culture, you can finally begin to understand it--somebody like Kirkpatrick would laugh themselves sick at modern stereotypes of Islam, for instance, considering that all the Muslims he knew (including himself, eventually) had more in common with the vague Deist British intelligentsia of the period, and lived in cosmopolitan surroundings where Hindus celebrated festivals at the shrines of Sufi saints--in a period when religious Christians were soon to become the threat to stability and harmony in India, not religious Muslims.

As Dalrymple says at the close of his book, East and West have mingled before; they will do so again, whether we like it or not. I hope that happens sooner rather than later, but how comfortable we find that association will depend on how strongly we insist on the barriers between our tribes and sub-tribes and classes and cultures. I would just as soon dispense with those, in favor of the things that unite us.