#like you had to have seen my schedule when you went to fix those two days... like agsgdggdgdgdgd moron

[bunnyb34r]

Thinking ab how I sent my manager an email the day before I had a mandatory week off and cant access my work email at home 😌 agsgdggdgdgd

[sharksupermacy]

on your mind

on your mind- haerin x lee! trainee! reader

synopsis: pt 2 of on your mind

genre: crack, lee hyein being a menance, reader being a little goofy, a bit of flirty reader pt.1

after meeting up with haerin you headed over to another café to meet with your little sister hyein. ruffling her hair through your hoodie as you sat across from her, who had already bought you a drink.

"AWWEEEEE, my little sister is actually being nice and not being a little ankle biter," you gushed out to your little sister, sarcastically pinching her cheeks while she swatted you away.

"you know, i'm just as grown as you," hyein groaned.

"sure, you are sweetheart," you said believably. you patted her hair , ruining it more.

as she was trying to fix her hair for the 14th time since the start of the meet, she asked you why you were late, as it was unusual to be a minute late to your meetups. with your reply being that you had to meet up with your school partner friend to hand off a project because she couldn't make it due to a scheduling conflict. after both of you finished with your drinks, hyein decided that she wanted you to meet her members soon as it would be nearly impossible because of promotions. so she asked you if you were free and if you would like to meet her members. to which you responded yes, excited to meet her members, buying little gifts with hyein before going to the dorm.

hyein texted the group chat that she was going to bring over her sibling, and all of the group members, thinking it would be her two oldest siblings, shrugged it off and replied, Ok. imagine the shock when hyein walked in with someone who was not either one of those siblings; it was the elusive third sibling, whom no one had ever seen except in childhood pictures. it was dani who was the first to see you with your short hair, baggy clothing, tall frame, and how you looked nothing like hyein at all. she froze from pure shock in her spot on the couch.

quickly bowing to her, you headed to hyein's room, where hanni was still struggling with writing lyrics. you sat down with hyein, asking her where you should leave the gifts you had bought for her members. Her response was, "just give them it and tell them that you're my sibling." hanni being the ever-curious being that she is, decided to peek down from her top bunk, saw you and hyein talking, and went back to her writing. she did a double take when she realized that you weren't any of the two siblings she thought were coming over.

"IS THAT YOUR THIRD SIBLING HYEIN?!???" she screeched out from her top bunk, gaining the attention of minji, who had just come home, and snapped dani out of a trance who was on the couch.

you were scared the hell out of because you didn't know that hanni was up there and that she could yell so loud. hearing the scream, the australian and fake canadian ran as fast as they could to the shared bedroom.

"hanni, what's wrong," questioned minji who was concerned. seeing hanni was pointing behind her towards hyein bed, she turned around slowly, only to see hyein and her project partner there.

WAIT. her project partner is there "why are you here y/n? wait scratch that how did you even get in here," she questioned you as you pointed towards sister to explain.

the youngest finally decided to introduce you, "girls this is my older "mysterious" sibling y/n. y/n these are my members: hanni on the bunk bed; danielle is the one with the curly hair , and i assume you already know minji the third tallest person here right now."

"third? you are hardly taller than me, hyein," minji started to bicker with hyein, who was manically laughing at her own joke.

haerin sensing a disturbance in her dorm, ended up venturing outside of her shared room towards the loud noises in the other bedroom. oddly enough, she couldn't understand the fuss of having one of hyein siblings over, as they had all met the two eldest before. until she saw you sitting quietly leaning on hyein bed frame, watching the chaos unfold between her members.

"y/n?" she muttered out, still catching your attention as you smiled in her direction. she ducked between her fighting members, and quietly took your hand and led you into another room. funnily enough, nobody had noticed the disappearance of the two parties.

"why are you here?" she stated it as if you had just committed a severe crime punishable by death.

"i didn't know my sister had a attractive member," you answered trying to flirt with her hoping to ease the tension a bit.

"oh, who's your sister? is it hyein?" she asked because you shared a common last name.

"yea, but i don't really come over because trainee schedules are a bit brutal over at jyp... but i surely can make more of an effort for you," you said laughing. you glanced over at clock widening your eyes a bit realizing you definitely had practice soon. "such a shame I have to end this conversation with such a pretty person," you said with a pout, "but.. if you ever do find yourself with a bit of extra time, feel free to get my number from my sister to text me." you said while running back towards the other room hugging your younger sister saying you had to go practice now. messing her hair up and bowing to the three olders before sprinting out the door leaving the dorm.

confusion was left in the dorm from that visit.

it was 2 weeks since the day haerin had encountered you. strangely enough it was only 2 days that she caved and asked for hyein for your number. however, with the number saved in her contacts you would think she would text you but she hasn't.

fed up and annoyed about haerin reluctance to contact you in the 2 weeks she had your number decided as the lovely cupid that she is to text you from your phone.

###-####-###: hey!!! it's haerin wait no your sister. you know what i mean-

y/n lee: LEE HYEIN. first off how did you get haerin phone,- bro get off it- it's not yours leave haerin phone alone.

pretty newjeans member: oooo.. getting jealous are we-

y/n lee: no??? why do you even have HER phone LEE HYEIN.

pretty newjeans member: BECAUSE SHE WAS TO CHICKEN TO ASK YOU ON A DSTE-OMG HAWN UNbIE IS ABCK_ HAEFJKDP-SHECHoKINGMEFSLK

y/n lee: HA ! THATS WHAT YOU GET! OH! can you tell her i would also like to go on a date with her too!

pretty newjeans member:👍

you smiled at your screen and giggled at hyein antics about getting you and her member together. going back to scribbling down lyric ideas in your book about as you daydream about your date with haerin. 

a/n: just a small continuation of on your mind. bro. i've been playing rhythm hybe for the past like week and i have not stopped- help- (also im watching swf2 its super good)

[stxrvel]

not my one

summary: bucky was in love with you, from the bones to the tips of his hair, and life would be perfect for him if it weren't for the fact that you had just gotten engaged to Steve.

pairing: (bucky barnes x) f!reader x steve rogers

words: 4k

warnings: some bad words, bucky regretting a lot of things, bucky suffers a lot, reader is not aware of anything, miscommunication, bucky can be unfair to those around him. love triangle?¿ also angst. like i said before, there's no happy endings in this account.

note: hi! i had this in my drafts too for days until my inspiration strike again, and also only by leehi was playing on repeat on my headphones while writing this. if you want a full experience, i highly recommend you to listen to that song while reading. there's something in using a love song to write a heartbreaking story. anyway, i hope you all like this!! and i dont know when ill see you again so i really hope you guys enjoy this one. feedback is always appreciated! <3

So… Bucky knew it was wrong. From the beginning, from the first furtive glance, from the first unexpected, not at all reciprocal, brush. Bucky knew it was very wrong. His moral compass was shot when his thoughts, his intentions, went south and he couldn't stop them, or just didn't want to. At first it was hard to stop them, but at least he knew he intended to. After a good while, Bucky couldn't be sure he was really trying to stop it at all.

His gaze wandered in the crowds, among familiar faces, but only one that really cheered his soul. Guilt followed him, too. Maybe he had stopped fighting the feeling, but that didn't make it any more bearable. Seeing those two faces, smiling at them like it was nothing, asking them about the ring as if it were casual small talk while his heart contracted, made him feel like a traitor every day, and that guilt hung on his back like a bag full of stones. He carried his own sin like the unworthy one he was.

Still, he loved carrying those little moments in his heart, as if they really meant something, as if he didn't feel like he lost something every time he did it, as if butterflies flew around him when they did and everyone around him got as excited as he did, as if all the love songs came true in a single moment. As if saying I love you was as easy as breathing.

“Bucky, what do you say?”

But that was all just in his head.

“I'm with Natasha this time.”

The whole table was filled with shouts and boos. Bucky felt like he could shrink back in his seat and disappear.

Your face was right in front of his, a huge smile made your eyes sparkle. Everyone he knew was gathered and there were so many places Bucky could look, but he couldn't tear his gaze away from the curve of your lips. It was electrifying the way a simple distant gesture could ignite his body like that.

And it was shattering the way he had to remind himself that he couldn't stare for that long.

Not when the first person you saw after laughing was Steve. Not when the first hand you held was his. Not when those sparkling eyes were only for him. Bucky had to remind himself that he couldn't stare at you too long because you were his, for Steve, even though Bucky felt like he was eternally yours.

Bucky could remember the first time he'd seen you because it had been the first time he'd felt alive after so long living in the shadows and dust.

He was fixing his motorcycle, as he used to do countless times, instead of having gone out with his friends to the dinner that night that Wanda had scheduled. Every month they had an outing and one of them had to organize it. That was how they'd basically managed to stay in touch after so long after being out of college.

Bucky knew everyone was going to hate him for canceling at the last minute, but he really didn't feel like going out. So he sat outside his garage with his motorcycle looking for any slightest mistake he could fix or any scratches he could paint while he spent the entire day just there. That was his plan. But everything changed the moment you suddenly appeared in front of him, in a white flowered dress that he could still remember, that you actually still wore, and asked him if he could help you. With those doe eyes and a pout Bucky couldn't have escaped you, even if he wanted to.

“Excuse me, hello,” Bucky heard your voice for the first time and raised his head as if he knew what was in store for him.

Seeing you for the first time was very pleasurable, Bucky truly thought you were the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his entire life. The tool in his hand was halfway through fixing something on his motorcycle when his hand froze and his lips remained pursed. When he thought about it from time to time, Bucky thought he must have looked like an idiot.

“I don't want to bother you. Uhm… I'm Y/N. I just moved into the house over there,” you moved to point to one of the houses in the neighborhood that Bucky had seen for sale, being so far inside his own head to even realize that someone actually moved in there. “I wanted to know if… Well, it's just that I see you fix things and I- My car broke down. I don't know what's wrong with it, but it won't start with anything. I don't know anybody around either and only you were around, could you help me?”

Bucky had never heard a person ramble on like that. Rather he could say he had never heard such a melodic voice nor had he ever found a person who just rambled so tender and entertaining.

He took a moment to look behind you, where indeed there was a black car parked near the approach with the hood open. Returning his gaze back to you, he found you anxiously waving interlocked hands and a slightly frowning brow.

“Sure,” was all he said.

The smile you sketched for him felt like a reward.

“Thank you! Really thank you so much.”

Bucky could only nod as he picked himself up off the floor.

At that moment, your gaze lowered and met the bare chest of a man who spent every morning looking for something to fix on his perfectly good motorcycle. Bucky didn't think it was ever possible again, but he felt his cheeks redden.

“I'm going to-” Bucky motioned pointing to his house and then to his bare chest and then disappeared behind the door leading into his living room from the garage.

As he entered he had leaned against the closed door and berated himself for acting like a teenager and not a responsible adult who paid his taxes on time.

He came back out a few minutes later wearing a dark shirt and found you circling around his bike, looking at it as if you were in a museum. When he approached, you straightened up in embarrassment. Bucky wondered what you could feel embarrassed for when your very existence was worthy of being admired like that in a huge museum.

“Is that your car over there?” he asked stupidly, pointing to the only car parked along the road.

But as if that hadn't been too obvious a remark, you nodded animatedly and started walking in the direction of the vehicle. It looked like that huge grin wasn't going to disappear from your face since he agreed to help you, and Bucky felt like he was going to get in trouble for it.

“It came out of the garage very normally and I parked it here. I turned the engine off and went inside to get some stuff out and when I came back it just wouldn't start,” you explained with a cute frown, as you moved closer and closer to the car, that he couldn't stop staring at as if that was what he had to fix.

“Okay,” he almost whispered, and was startled as you moved closer to him to hear what he was saying. “You can stay in the seat and turn it on when I tell you.”

You shook your head animatedly again and went to sit down to wait for his direction. Bucky lingered for a moment processing the delicious floral, sweet smell, and the vanilla that your perfume gave off. He felt it wouldn't be long before it became his favorite scent. The lavender and vanilla. Bucky wasn't even a fan of ice cream or flowers.

He reluctantly looked down, letting the scent escape into the air. He quickly spot the problem and, after a simple motion, reached up to lower the hood.

“You can turn it on now.”

Bucky watched your surprised face, eyebrows raised and lips curved in a circle. It startled him how fast you were making his heart move in such a short time. How was that even possible?

It was even better when you moved the key and the car started without a hitch, with that giant crescent smile that almost hid your eyes completely. By the time you got out of the car, any trace of discomfort or nervousness in you was gone.

“Thank you very, very, very much. You don't know what you just saved me from…”

Bucky stared intently into your shining eyes, as if in the midst of a trance, as if he had to do it to live. He became so immersed in his introspection that he almost didn't notice that you were waiting for him to give you his name.

“Bucky.”

“Bucky…”

He almost melted at your melodious voice repeating his name as simple as butter, as if that's the way it had always been.

“Thank you so much, Bucky.”

He nodded, barely curving his lips into a half smile, and that also served as a farewell.

Bucky didn't know, or maybe he did, that from that moment on he wasn't going to be able to get you out of his head. And even if he tried, doing so would be more painful than simply leaving you there growing in his thoughts like ivy.

--

Bucky had spent many nights thinking about what had gone wrong. He replayed conversations in his head endlessly, like a broken record he replayed his own words, thought about what it all would have been like if he had done something different, if he had said something different, if that really would have been a relief to his heart. Bucky had already thought of everything, but really the only answer is that you were not meant to be together as he'd imagined.

Nothing was ever reciprocated. Any spark, any friction, it all had to have been inside his head because there was no other explanation.

And everything changed that night.

He had talked to you too many times since your car thing, even though it was hard for him. You had been to his house and he had been to yours almost countless times. You would meet in town and drive back together. You walked early on weekends. You brought him the best dishes he'd ever tasted in his life to eat together….

And he decided to take you to meet his friends. Even before he took you on a date. Before talking about what you had. Before a kiss. Before sleeping together.

For Bucky there was nothing more important than you meeting his friends. That's how big his love was, even if sometimes he lied so he wouldn't see them. It was his way of loving.

Every day of his life he regretted that decision because that night it was all about Steve and you. That night he felt like the world was falling apart on him. Everyone was talking about Steve and you. That you had so much in common, that you would make a cute couple, that your children would be beautiful. Bucky loved his friends, but that night…

After that everything went to hell.

As if you'd never met him, your days began to fill with Steve.

“Where are you going?”

“Oh. I'm going to meet Steve. We have a reservation.”

“Ah.”

Every day. There wasn't a day when he didn't hear his best friend's name come out of your mouth, sentencing him to eternal agony, because Bucky was never able to tell him that he loved you first, that he fell in love first. He couldn't do that to Steve who in so many things had been with him and had gone through so much.

“Are you free tonight?”

“No, Buck, I'm sorry. I'm going out with Steve.”

“Oh, sure. Is he coming to pick you up?”

“No, I'll take a cab.”

“At this hour?”

“Don't worry. I'll text you when I get there.”

And you did. But you wrote him too much. You told him how amazing the date had gone. You described how good you felt around him. And you confessed to him that you'd kissed.

Bucky thought about moving out after that.

“Hi, Bucky!”

But he also thought about how hard it would be to be so far away from you. Maybe it was worth it to avoid a broken heart, but…. No, it was too late for that now.

“Are you doing anything tonight?”

He lifted his head so fast he felt a whiplash of tension run down his back.

“No. Why?”

Could it be possible that…?

“Then you are cordially invited to a game night at my house. Sincerely, Steve and I.”

Steve and I.

Bucky shouldn't have been disappointed because he knew he shouldn't have felt hope in the first place, but he didn't expect to feel the anger bubbling in his chest either. You walked away like it was nothing after that, with a huge smile on your face, the one that made him fall in love with you in the first place. You walked animatedly as if you hadn't just stomped his heart to smithereens. You walked totally oblivious to the overwhelming guilt that grew from the pit of his stomach to plant itself in his chest for the first time.

You didn't even know anything. There was no way Bucky could blame you. Not even Steve. He had only himself to blame. For not speaking up first, for waiting so long, for not taking the risk.

Bucky didn't go to that game night.

Not the next one, not the one after that, not the one after that, not the one after that, not the one after that either…

Bucky stopped going to his friends' monthly meetings. He always said he had too much work. And yes, he dragged out his own work so he wouldn't even risk thinking about all he had lost.

At least five months passed and it was a year to the day since that night when Bucky made the worst mistake of his life.

That night he was surprised to find Steve outside his door.

He had just come home from work. It was close to ten o'clock at night. His face was cold from the weather and from not wearing his helmet since entering his residential area.

“Steve,” was his greeting.

“Bucky,” his friend reciprocated as he parked the bike in his garage.

Reluctant to any kind of conversation that might come up that night, Bucky tried to find any possible excuse to get Steve to leave. But he took too long.

“We're neighbors now,” was all Steve said, once Bucky got off the bike and turned to face him.

“What?”

“I moved in with Y/N today. I live with her now.”

Like a hundred broken panes of glass Bucky's heart sounded every time it pounded. His friend's sparkling eyes were telling him, screaming at him to say something, to congratulate him, a few words, but his breath caught in his throat and he didn't even feel like he could trust his own legs at that moment.

You had moved in together.

You loved Steve so much that you'd asked him to move in with you.

“That's good, Steve.”

Not even great, just good. The words came almost slurred out of his mouth, and yes, his own head ripped the words out of him before it became too awkward and suspicious a silence.

“We tried to call you to come by after work. We had a little party.”

“I had my cell phone on silent.”

Bullshit. Bucky had seen every call, even yours, along with your messages, and had spent a good while just staring at the screen wondering what it could be about that both of you at the same time wanted to contact him.

“I figured.”

Steve sighed, and for a second Bucky thought he had figured it out. From the look on his face, Bucky figured he'd tell him to stay away from you and not try to get close because he'll have him between his eyebrows.

“You can stop by tomorrow at breakfast, if you want.”

Somehow, that was worse.

“No, thanks.”

“Buck-”

“I'm leaving very early for work.”

“Bucky-”

“I can't, Steve, I'm sorry.”

“Bucky, we haven't seen you in months.”

The aforementioned stood halfway through opening the door to his living room, almost completely forgetting that had he gone through to the other side he would have locked his best friend in his garage and, for a moment, that almost didn't even matter to him. The thought scared him.

“It's been about four months since I've seen you in person. I figured you were going through something and needed time, but hasn't it been a long time already?”

“Five.”

“What?”

“It's been five months,” Bucky turned to look at his friend unhinged face and guilt washed over him once more, as strong as the first time, a great wave breaking the sand. “Come in. So you can go out the front door because I already locked that door and it's electric and very slow and…”

The sympathetic expression on Steve's face didn't please him, he decided he didn't like it. It looked like he was looking at him with sorrow, with pain, but he didn't understand, he wasn't going through half of what Bucky was feeling everyday, he didn't have the slightest idea. He was going to a warm bed after this, at least, and Bucky would get to the great solitude of his thoughts.

No. Steve didn't understand shit.

“Don't look at me with that fucking face,” he exclaimed before he could stop himself. “Just leave.”

Bucky thought about that hurt expression on Steve's face for several days.

--

Two months later, somehow, you had convinced Bucky to attend one of your monthly meetings. It was so hard and yet so easy to make that decision, because you had gone all the way to his house and knocked on his door and asked him to come so many times that he couldn't say no just to avoid seeing your disappointed face.

And so it had come to that moment. That moment where everyone was booing Natasha and Bucky could tell by your huge smile that he hadn't gotten over you one bit. Two months without seeing you had been for nothing. That zero contact method surely only worked with teenagers.

As the laughter dissipated, Bucky thought about all he had been through and all he had suffered in silence. He hated that he couldn't hate anyone because everything that had happened was his fault. He hated every time he logged on to his text app and had to find himself in the group chat various messages about how Steve and you made such a great couple that neither of them could wait for you to get married.

Maybe Bucky complained too much.

Because the next thing he knew, everyone gathered around the table and you announced your engagement to Steve. When the table was again filled with shouts and applause, Bucky couldn't take his eyes off the giant ketchup stain on the table that Natasha had caused by getting too excited about the news. The envelope had been crushed by her hand, splattering its contents on that piece of the table and even on the shirts of those nearby. But no one really cared, because you and Steve were getting married. No one except…

... Bucky's weak and bruised heart, which despite the months could never stop beating just for you. Even though he tried, for his sake, for the sake of your friendship, for the sake of being happy for his best friend, he simply could not. It was a losing battle for him from the start. Ever since you showed up in his front yard in that blessed white flowered dress you were wearing now to deliver that news, and you smiled gratefully at him with the same smile you had now as you were encircled by Wanda and Tony's arms.

Bucky wanted to say that he'd grown accustomed to the pain that accompanies a broken heart, but the truth was that it never got easier. Every time he felt that pain, he prayed he wouldn't have to feel it again, because the pain that followed was so much stronger, so much so that he felt it suck the air out of him and a hollowness made its space inside his chest.

Bucky was really struggling to keep his composure at that moment.

But when he looked away from the large ketchup stain on the table, he met Steve's eyes, and somehow he knew. Bucky knew that he knew. However it was, coincidence or fate, Bucky realized that Steve knew what was going through his head.

And, for some reason, Steve didn't look angry.

But Bucky wasn't taking that pressure. Feeling invisible hands suffocating him.

So he barely mumbled an apology to him and ran out of the house.

His intention was to make it to the safety of his house, but his legs only gave out until he found his motorcycle parked in front of the future husband and wife's house.

His breathing was heavy, rapid and ragged. Of all the heartbreaks, that one was perhaps the most painful.

“Bucky?”

Hearing your voice behind him as he tried to fight the anxiety of not crying, not that moment, not in that place, not when it could be so obvious to you, was like a bucket of cold water. He suddenly felt alert, uncovered.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes. Why?”

“You ran out of the house.”

Although he tried to avoid it, the first thing he saw when you stepped around him to face him was the large ring that was now part of you. It was beautiful and delicate, Steve had made a good choice.

“I was overwhelmed for a moment. The screaming and stuff,” he gave you a lousy excuse, but it seemed to convince you enough.

“Oh, sure, I'm sorry. Do you want me to make you some tea? I've got a soothing one.”

“No,” Bucky shook his head quickly. “No need. I'd better go to my place.”

“So soon?”

Bucky looked into those deer eyes he loved so much and it hurt so much to think that would be the last time he saw them.

“Yeah, I'll feel better there. Don't worry.”

“Text me if you need anything.”

“Sure,” he wasn't going to. “Ah, congratulations on the engagement.”

Bucky was going to leave it at that, at a few simple words he tried to say with his heart in his hand, but you went further and jumped in to hug him by wrapping your arms around his neck. He felt dizzy for a moment.

“If it wasn't for you I never would have met him. Thanks, Buck.”

Bucky swallowed hard to keep from collapsing right there in your arms.

“Sure.”

“And to think I thought I'd end up with you,” you blurted out with a chuckle, as if it was nothing, as you backed away from his body, as if you hadn't just dropped a bomb on his face.

Bucky went cold.

“What?”

You laughed again, as if it was nothing more than a funny anecdote from adolescence or college. His chest heaved from the pain, his heart pounding so hard he felt it behind his ears. Hands sweaty, he didn't feel ready to listen to you.

“When we first met I liked you, Bucky, and I thought maybe we could work something out… But then I met Steve and it was… Wow, like fireworks.”

“Ah.”

“I guess things really do happen for a reason.”

“Yeah, right,” Bucky replied on automatic, afraid that any distraction would give him a glimpse, trying to even out his breathing.

“Well, you know, text me if you need anything.”

“Yeah.”

“Bye.”

“Bye.”

“See you at the wedding, huh.”

“Sure.”

Bucky followed you with his eyes as you walked back to your driveway, where Steve was waiting for you. His gaze lit up as much as yours every time he saw you and the lump in Bucky's throat kept getting bigger and bigger. He couldn't be one second closer to that house.

But then you walked into the house and Bucky met Steve's gaze.

He started to get on his bike as his best friend started walking towards him.

“Why didn't you ever say anything?”

Bucky remained sitting on the bike, helmet in his hands.

“I'm not going to talk about this with you now, Steve.”

“No, Bucky, you're not going to do this again. Answer me.”

“Steve…”

“Answer me!”

Bucky turned to see his friend's contracted face and knew where his anger was coming from. It wasn't against him, it wasn't against his feelings.

“I just… I couldn't do it.”

“And that's all?”

“Yeah, that's all,” Bucky started the bike. “I couldn't say anything when I saw you smile for the first time in months. Not when you actually looked happy after everything you went through.”

“What I went through? What we went through, Bucky! We both suffered through it and you… you…”

“Whatever it is, Steve, it's over. The time is past. It's all behind us.”

“Bucky…” Steve slurred the words, incredulous, pained to see his best friend allowed to suffer like that. In deep pain because he knew if it had been the other way around he would have done the same.

“I'll be fine. Send me the invitation to the wedding. I promise I'll be there, if you want me there. And I'll be fine by then. I'll be fine.”

Bucky finally put on the case and without waiting for final words from Steve, he took off riding to an aimless destination.

He didn't know if he would be better by the time the wedding happened, because thinking about it at that moment made the tears run desperately down his cheeks, even though the wind dried them very quickly, just as they were replaced by others and others.

Bucky had no idea if he would ever be well again, but he had to try. He had to try because at that moment he felt like he would die.

[httpknjoon]

masters of handling break ups | ksj

plot | After the tabloids released news of you and Jin ending your unconfirmed relationship, the world watches how you two will handle it.

words | 1210

genres | humor/crack, barely fluff, actors!au

pairing | actor!jin x famous!reader

warning | language

disclaimer | usernames used in the fic are all fictional.

note | i was inspired to finish this after jin's the astronaut. it's wonderful. y'all better stream 🤨 this scenario is inspired by a real-life Hollywood couple haha have fun reading!

main masterlist | drabble series

Sometime in 2018, a year after the release of your first film with Jin, another rumor went around. It was a hundred percent different than the usual news about you two. It was a split-up rumor. Of course, it caused a disastrous stir both in the media and on the Internet. 

@/y/nfan: what do you mean YN-JIN broke up????????

@/purplejin: NOOOO WE BARELY EVEN GOT ANY CONFIRMATION ABT THEIR RELATIONSHIP

@/Y/NJINUpdates: [closed]

replying to @/YNJINUPDATES

– @/Y/NJINUpdates: No, I’m kidding. I’m not closing this account since neither Y/N nor Jin shared any statement about this issue.

@/itsworldwidejin: y’all didn’t believe me when i told u that relationship is just pr 🤣

replying to @/itsworldwidejin

– @/y/nism: please 😭😭 neither of them needed pr

@/glossylips: My mom is wondering why my sister is crying in her room for hours now. How am I going to explain this to her????

replying to @/glossylips

– @/Andrei101: Just tell ur mom two celebrities broke up.

— @/glossylips: No, can’t do. I’m crying too 😭💔

“Oh my god. She was a mess.”

A source shared with some news outlets. Tabloids and magazines had your pictures on their front page. The images were all unflattering, honestly. It was taken during your regular routine when you don’t have work. You were seen getting coffee with a messy hairdo with dark sunglasses on. 

“She always wears those to hide her tired eyes. She has been crying all the time since Jin broke up with her due to her extreme jealousy. There was a time she was even sobbing while ordering her usual cup.”

Almost four weeks after that news, all eyes were still on both of you. You flew to Atlanta for the production of your new Apple+ movie. Still, the paparazzi are taking every chance they can to have snaps of you in your worst times. One of them is you walking to your trailer while tearing up. There was even a video of you being hugged by Florence Pugh, one of your co-stars, while you sobbed.

“It was heard that she and Jin tried to fix everything. But it was useless. Their busy schedules didn’t help. Her co-stars were all kind and considerate of her when she ask for a quick break.”

Jin was seen in the same somber mood too. Although the media didn’t get many shots of him like yours, who’s always teary,  they still got many contents to feast on. Especially since Jin is doing promo and interviews for his film with a friend, Hoyeon Jung.

During press junket, everyone always pointed out how quiet Jin is. He didn’t really talk much unless needed. He wore a plain expression on his face, looking more serious than those times he was doing press with you. Yes, he would laugh with Hoyeon but he doesn’t joke much. His fans defended him, saying that the actor is probably tired. 

“Jin is totally heartbroken by the split up. He is a loner type. He would separate himself from his castmates after promos. After the premiere of Stardust in New York, Jin didn’t attend the afterparty and flew home to California instead. He and Hoyeon are just friends. It was Y/N’s jealousy and later, their limited time, that pushed them to break up.

They are also reports where a source shared that Jin was heard talking to someone through a phone call. They suspected it was you as the actor can be heard being “soft” with his choice of words and tone.

Fans and the media waited for any statement from you or Jin. But you two remained quiet on social media, only posting ads for your sponsors. Jin, who is a very private person, always has his manager look out for any possible intimate questions that the newspeople will ask. Donny was even asked about you two during his Instagram Live but he simply dodged it. Your manager, Hailey, was the one who handled your phone since you rarely used it during production.

It was safe to say that both of your and Jin’s separate fanbases were in a drought.

Almost eight weeks after the news circulated the world, Jin was the first one who broke the social media silence between you two. He uploaded a two-minute-long clip. It was an instant viral video as you were also in it. 

“So…I have some news to break to you, Y/N.”

It seems like you two were just out for your usual tennis game. You wore a white v-neck tennis dress with a matching Nike visor. A couple of tennis rackets can be seen in the backseat of the car. You looked absolutely better than the anguish paparazzi photos of you going around for the last two months. 

“Wait.” you took a sip from your water bottle. “Okay, what’s the news, Jinnie?”

“They said, we broke up because of jealousy… “ Jin reads the magazine in his hand.

You gasped dramatically, “We did?!”

Jin bit his lower lip, trying not to laugh at your exaggerated reaction. But you continued, “I bet it’s because of Francheskat.”

He nodded, “Yeah if there’s a fire right now, I’m taking Francheskat with me.” 

“Brave of you to assume that. Of course, my lovely daughter and I already got out of the fire by the time you went in.” you rolled your eyes. Your eyes landed on the magazine he was holding. You took it and read it yourself. “Oh, wait. It’s not because of Francheskat. This one says, Y/N is jealous of Jin spending more time with his co-actor, Hoyeon Jung. Please, Hoyeon likes me more than this old man right here.”

“That’s–” Jin was about to object but he paused. “That’s true– not the old guy part– but Hoyeon does like Y/N more.”

“That’s why I’m asking her to marry me next time I see her,” you added. Then, you turned to Jin with a wide-eyed expression. “Wait, are we even dating?”

Jin mirrored your expression, gaping, “Oh my god. Are we?”

The video ended in that scene. Jin simply captioned it with four exclamation marks. Everyone found it hilarious. Hoyeon even commented:

@/hoooooyeony: @/urfavecatlady darling, i’m waiting for the ring 😪

Other celebrities commented too, laughing at how you two reacted to such news from a gossip magazine. At the same time, your fans were all jumping to Twitter. Rejoicing like rain finally came to stop the drought.

@/seokiejinnie0613: 그들은 정말 짜증나 ㅋ ㅋ ㅋ ㅋ  (Translated: They are so annoying hahahaha)

@/YNJINUpdates: Finally, it’s official! This account remains open! Kala niyo mapapabagsak niyo ko, mga tanga HAHAHA (Translated: You thought you can drag me down, idiots! HAHAHA)

@/missy/n: y/n looks so good in that video

@/alpacaarejins: YNJIN remains strong. Love is still alive, people!

@/sunnyy/njin: the fact that we cannot tell if they are really together or what 😭 i’m confused af

On Florence Pugh’s birthday, you posted the same paparazzi photos that were taken earlier. The one where you were crying in her arms. You captioned it: 

@/urfavecatlady: Happy birthday to my beloved, @/florencepugh. Thank you for giving me the warmest hugs during my worst times (FUCKING MENSTRUAL CRAMPS 🤬😤😡). Know that I love you so much. Sending you love from LA. 🤍

taglist rules

THE A-LISTERS TAGLIST

@seolaquotes @fatimaaaaa129 @bangtannieshope @jub-jub @yoontaethings @kissme-ornot @sleepy-daydreams @veronawrites @cuteipat @ratherbefangirling @babystarcandy-gcf @akirawhore @alpacaparkaseok @rjsmochii @prlan @lovesickbangtan @zealouslightcookiebasketball @rapmonie2047 @potate-oh

PERMANENT TAGLIST

@dunixxd​ @cixrosie​ @moonchild1 ​ @jksjx​ @embrace-themagic ​ @buttvi​  @starbtslove​  @missseoulite @vanntaesworld @barbiekatz

[mikefaistslut]

anything for you

chapter 1:

(A mike faist fanfic set in spring 2023, as mike is headed to london for the summer to star in Brokeback Mountain. He meets a girl on the plane there, Emma. He falls in love with Emma instantly. Read more to see how their story unfolds. <3)

Disclaimer: this is entirely a work a fiction and has nothing whatsoever to actually do with mike faist.

Rolling out of bed at what I thought was around six in the morning, I began to get dressed and prepare myself for how anxious the airport was going to make me. I’d never been a good flier, especially on flights that lasted longer than a couple of hours. Today, I was set to leave on a 9 hour and 50 minute flight from Columbus, Ohio to London at 10am. This trip was my gift to myself. I’d always wanted to go to London and do every lame tourist activity that I’d always seen in the movies. I wanted to stand outside the gates at Buckingham Palace, attend a service at Westminster Abbey, take a ride on the London Eye, maybe even fall in love with an adorable English man and never go back home to Ohio. I’d been saving for this trip since I got my first job at fifteen. I’d imagine what it felt like to walk through Hyde Park and see a play on the west end while I scooped an ungodly amount of ice cream for strangers.

The hardest part is surviving the flight there. I made sure to get up insanely early and have some me-time before the flight to try and relax myself as much as possible. After fixing myself a cup of coffee and scrolling through my phone for a solid 15 minutes or so, I decided to take a hot shower. This would be an everything shower, seeing that there's no way I could bring along my arsenal of bath products. But I let myself take it slow. After I finished washing and conditioning my hair, I shaved, scrubbed, and exfoliated every inch of my body. I loved the way it felt to be clean and smooth. Especially clean. I had to be clean to feel like my best self and I had to feel like my best self to be relaxed enough to not have an absolute meltdown on this almost ten hour flight I was scheduled to be on. 

By 7:30, I was all ready to go with an uber waiting outside to take me to the airport. I had two weeks worth of clothes, my favorite blanket and pillow in my carry-on, and most importantly, my anti-anxiety medication for when I inevitably begin to panic as soon as the plane door shuts. I was anxious, but also so overwhelmingly excited. I wasn’t going to let my anxiety stand in the way of the trip I’ve been fantasizing about for almost ten years. Not when I was so close. 

Flying wasn’t a new experience to me. There’d been plenty of times when I was a kid that I went on flights with my family, mostly to visit my grandparents in Florida. But this was different. This was around the world. Flying to London also meant going through customs, which was an entirely foreign concept to me. But I was there and I was ready. First things first, I thought to myself as I made my way to my gate after going through TSA, a snack. I bought a latte and a ridiculously overpriced bag of chips and made my way back to my gate to get comfortable. I still had about 30 minutes until my flight was supposed to begin boarding, so I put on my headphones and played some soft music on my phone. Everything was going to be okay, I kept telling myself. It is so incredibly unlikely that my plane is going to crash, I just need to keep myself distracted and everything will be just fine. 

Those 30 minutes went by faster than I expected, and it was time to board. I gathered my things and made my way to the gate. 

“Excuse me! I think you left this behind.” I turned around to the most beautiful face I think I’ve ever seen. Beautiful blue eyes, thin, almond-shaped eyes and a jawline that was so perfectly sculpted. In a hurry to board, I’d left behind my carry-on bag that contained all my essentials. Phone charger, comfort pillow and blanket and anti-anxiety meds. 

“Oh, thank you so much!” And then I thought about it. “How’d you know it was mine?” I asked the handsome stranger. 

“Oh, it just seems to match the rest of your luggage, I guess.” I had a sense that he’d maybe looked my way a couple of times while also waiting to board the plane. Even if I was being totally delusional, it was a nice confidence boost to assume that’s what happened. 

“Right! Well thank you. You boarding this flight too?” 

“Yeah, actually. After you.” He motioned in the direction of the gate attendant waiting patiently for us both to present our boarding pass and board the plane. Without looking behind me, I walked past the gate and down the long hallway to board the plane into business class to find my seat. I splurged a little and went one step past economy class. I had a lot of time to plan and save, you see. As I settled into my seat, I popped an anti-anxiety pill immediately. If I needed to later, I was also going to take a sleeping pill to hopefully make the flight go as fast as possible. As I was taking my pillow and blanket out of my bag to get comfy and settle in for the long plane ride ahead of me, I looked up to see that gorgeous stranger again. 

“Looks like we’ll be getting to know each other a little better.” He smiles as he sits down in the seat right next to mine. He’s so close I can smell his expensive cologne and I wonder how I got so lucky. 

“I’m Mike, by the way.”

[babyyweebbitch]

Price and his two children

price is a father confirmed by me

content warning : female reader ,

you, John and Kyle all had a few weeks off, those days were spent by going out places and you and Kyle staying up late playing games or watching movies. John has adopted you when you were 16, he found you after your father killed your mother, brothers and himself and ever since you guys have been together. you joined the military with him not too long after and you three have been inseparable (besides on missions)

you are also pretty silent… you don’t talk to anyone but John, Kyle, alex and farah. you’re usually sticking by one of them on missions, mainly John because yaknow — he saved you.

one morning John woke up did his usual routine of making tea, breakfast and sitting outside for an ungodly amount of time smoking a cigar and either reading the paper, watching news on his phone or a crossword puzzle (i have a headcannon that he acts way older than he actually is)

he realised he hasn’t seen you or kyle at all since he woke up so he decided to go check and see if you two were still alive. he got up and went to Kyles room first, nothing so he went to yours and he was met by you and Kyle passed out on the floor with game controls by your heads, the tv still on and cups of beverages. he sighed to himself since he knew you both were up playing games again

“these two…” he said to himself — he did the classic take his phone out and take pictures of this moment “at least they aren’t dead — at least they aren’t dead….” he whispered to himself before he closed the door as quietly as he could before going to go back to whatever he was doing before.

after a few hours of john doing whatever it is he does in the morning you and Kyle finally got up and went to the living room like usual. john was watching television when you sat next to him and kyle went to get some tea.

“finally you two are awake — what time did you go to sleep last night?” he asked, giving you a few back pats and then a hair ruffle

“uhhh….” you said

“about five…. in the morning —“

“five in the morning?! really?”

“we didn’t realize it until it was five….”

john shook his head and you poked him on the cheek, forehead and nose over and over again until he grabbed your hand and stopped you from poking again.

“we have to go back to work in two days so i hope you fix your sleep schedules”

“we will…. well, i will — i don’t know about Kyle”

“we don’t even have one. we sleep whenever we aren’t in fear of dying. which is rarely”

“i was never able to sleep before i met you guys so i’ll be fine”

john chuckled before he got up, you fell on the couch full face plant on the couch and you looked at him all offended. john laughed at this and helped you up

“sorry”

“i’m gonna go to the shop, i wanna get a new chair because someone” glaring at kyle “broke my old one”

“you pushed me, asshole!”

“there was a bed RIGHT next to the chair, you could have changed your direction!”

“the bed was 10 feet from the chair”

“LEAP!”

“okay okay — i’ll go with you, kyle you’re gonna pay though”

“why?!”

“he who breaks the chair, pays” you said, holding your head high and speaking in a viking accent. you walked over to him and hip bumped him. kyle jokingly punched you, you then got him in a headlock and then the mini wrestling match in the kitchen started.

“guys! you’re gonna break something”

you got up and you went to hide behind the counter. you knew you had won this fight and you also knew kyle didn’t like losing so he got up and started chasing you around the living room.

john who was getting more tea watched this and it made him feel like you both were his kids… even though you’re not blood related. part of him wish’s that you guyes where never in the military so life could be like this all the time — you were actually happy for the first time in a long time. john just stood and watched you both play around and then he went to his room to get ready

“okay! okay! i’m sorry!” you yelled and laughed, Kyle let you go and you stared rolling away. kyle sat down and caught his breath “that you’re a bitch!” you immediately got back up and ran to your room and kyle chased you but you had shut your door in time

“okay! fine, you win this time”

“pussy!”

kyle laughed and went to get ready to go out with you and John. after you all were ready you and Kyle sat in the living room. you were texting Soap while he was out on a mission. John came out his room and he went to grab the keys from the kitchen

“you two ready?”

“i am, dunno about him” you pointed to Kyle who was sleeping, you grabbed one of the pillows and threw it at him pretty fast and hard too. the noise it made when it hit sounded like a bullet. kyle jumped up and rubbed his face before seeing you with the biggest smile on your face

“good throw but damn…”

“i learn from the best”

“thank you!”

“i was talking about alex”

“WOW!”

“ouch, okay i see how it is”

the three of you laughed before heading out to go to the shop, you got your chair and a few groceries for the house. once you guys out out the store and were walking back you were holding a new bags while Kyle was holding your chair in his shoulder

“why did you have to get the most expensive chair!” kyle grunted as he walked beside you

“so you won’t break it this time”

“fuck you”

“love you too”

again…. John wish’s every day could be like this — you and Gaz have made his life a bit brighter since you all met — he wouldn’t trade it for the world

[tealmaskmybeloved]

Toxic Consequences AU: Chapter 1

Ally or Traitor?

(As always, notes will be under the cut. Enjoy!)

Kieran hated how everything went. Those two exchange students got to keep Ogerpon while he, the one who admired it since he was little, didn't.

It was unfair, and Kieran knew it. Not only that, but Florian and Juliana lied to him about the truth, that Ogerpon was the victim and that the Loyal 3 were villains.

Even his sister lied to him about it all...

Now Kieran was the Ogre in this situation.

Everyone else was against him, he truly was alone.

Until he wasn't.

Kieran was sitting behind the store Peachy's when he glanced ahead to see a strange Pokémon in front of him.

The Pokémon was about the size of Kieran's head, and had a pink outer shell covering its round body.The Pokémon looked a lot like a Pecha Berry, except a bit different. It stared at Kieran with glowing yellow eyes, interested in him.

"Wowzers..." Kieran mumbled. He'd never seen this Pokémon before, although it did resemble that odd plush at Peachy's. Maybe it was a new species or something?

The odd thing stared back at Kieran, it seemed to know why he was so upset, much to his confusion and bewilderment.

"You're an odd Pokémon, aren't you? I-I mean, I've never seen one like you before..."

Kieran started to get a little excited. He might have discovered a new species of Pokémon! He could get all the fortune and fame and not be the sniveling, pathetic, weak-

Kieran stopped himself from finishing that thought. He didn't want to linger on thinking so lowly of himself.

But it is true, isn't it?

Kieran glanced at the Pokémon. Was he going crazy or did he hear it talk? It wasn't really like normal talking. Rather, the voice echoed in his mind.

The voice came back, stronger than last time.

If you were stronger, then people would like you.

If you weren't a pathetic coward, then maybe you'd be seen as useful.

If you weren't so WEAK, then maybe Ogerpon would've chosen you!

That one snapped Kieran out of his state. He wanted to do something, anything, to fix his current situation.

Kieran looked back at the peach Pokémon, and to his surprise, it was offering him.... mochi?

Kieran's grandmother used to make mochi, and it was his favorite snack... but it was never that deep purple color.

It didn't seem harmful... so Kieran accepted it. He took a bit out of the purple colored treat. Upon tasting the mochi, it was incredibly sweet, like Pecha Berries, but nothing like Kieran tasted before.

"Wow... this is really good." Kieran said, smiling.

Despite the treat being a delight, Kieran was instantly reminded of his current situation again. Of being lied to about the Ogre, how they got to be friends with it... how they get to fix its mask....

Wait..... fix its mask.... that's it!

If Kieran took the mask and was able to fix it then surely Ogerpon would want to be with him, right? Then he would be able to show it that he's not just some weak kid, and it'd go with him! It had to work, it had to!

Yes, yes. Steal the mask. Bring it to Loyalty Plaza when you do.

Kieran looked back at the odd Pokémon. It wouldn't hurt to listen to it... besides, he didn't have any other options.... did he?

... No. It had to be done.

He made up his mind. Kieran knew what he had to do. He had to steal the Teal Mask.

HELL YEAH CHAPTER 1 IS OUT WOOOOOOOOOOT

I probably won't have the new chapter a day schedule I've been doing so far, but I'll try my best.

As always, feel free to send asks relating to the AU!

[cheesy09]

[CN] Kiro's Absolute Match Mind's Quest (Part 1)

🌸 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date that hasn't been released on the EN server yet! 🌸

Note: This date explores some very suggestive themes, so if you do not meet the game's required 16+ age rating, I'd suggest to avoid reading this date.

[CHAPTER 1]

MC: There isn't much time left to prepare for the this issue of "Youth Cheerleaders". Willow, tomorrow, please hurry up and follow up on the progress of the costumes and venue layout.

Willow: Don't worry, boss. According to the current schedule, we'll definitely be able to make it in time!

MC: That's great... does anyone else have anything to report?

Anna: I have one here.

Anna: Next month, Loveland City's Culture and Sports Bureau is planning on hosting a celebrity charity baseball game. The other party's taken a fancy to our company's publicity abilities and planned to talk to us.

Anna: However, their guests have not yet been completely finalized. Among those currently confirmed to be participating is this year's MLB super rookie Carol.

MC: Carol...

I vaguely felt that I had heard this name just recently, but with how hectic my work has been, my thoughts were all over the place.

Kiki: Carol... Isn't he that he that star player that Xiao Zheng's supposed to be interviewing today?

MC: Oh, yes! I almost forgot, Carol happened to be in Loveland City these two days.

If it hadn't been for the tight workload for "Youth Cheerleaders", I would've been happy to conduct such an interview. But if there was going to be a baseball game next month, there would definitely be more opportunities for contact.

The remaining work got sorted out, one after another. After the meeting, I sent a text to Xiao Zheng and asked him about the situation of the interview there.

After a while, Xiao Zheng replied back.

Xiao Zheng: The interview went very well! And boss, guess who I ran into backstage?

A group photo popped up before my eyes.

Xiao Zheng's black hair, Carol's platinum-blonde hair, and was the blonde-haired person with a smile on their face Kiro?!

When did Kiro get there?

While I was pondering over it, a message popped up on the pinned chat and as soon as I opened it, a familiar bright voice rang out.

Kiro: MC, you've seen that group photo, right? Hehe, I plan to introduce you to a new friend today. Come here when you're done!

I looked at the address he sent, which was an indoor baseball stadium in Loveland City, and then contacted him for a photo...

I sent him a little rabbit-like emoji, picked up my bag and quickly walked out the door.

-

Perhaps it was because the stadium was reserved, but the baseball arena was empty, and I spotted the most dazzling figure at a glance.

He held a bat in both hands, his eyes fixed on the ball machine and did not notice my arrival.

Boom!

I could barely see how Kiro swung his bat, and the ejected baseball had already been hit firmly by him into the scoring area.

MC: That's amazing!

Kiro caught onto the compliment I blurted out and he immediately turned his head.

Kiro: MC? Why did you come here so fast?

The next second, he put down the bat and walked towards me.

I was about to throw myself into his arms, but he suddenly stopped and raised his hands.

Kiro: Wait a moment.

MC: Eh?

Kiro: ...Hmm... Okay, okay...

He relaxed slightly, then stretched out his hand to hug me back, placing a light kiss on the tip of my nose.

Kiro: I thought it would take at least half an hour for you to get here. I'd planned on showering right after my workout to welcome you refreshed.

MC: Pfft, are you still afraid that I'd dislike you for smelling like sweat?

Kiro hummed twice in acquiescence.

MC: Why would I dislike it? I want to smell you more!

My grin grew wider, so I just hugged him and nuzzled against him a few more times.

MC: By the way, where's the new friend you wanted to introduce to me?

Kiro: He went out to take a call. Didn't you meet him at the door?

MC: No, I didn't see anyone else the entire way... Is it Carol?

Kiro: Mm, that's him.

Kiro: He was a teammate of my high school baseball team. He rarely comes to Loveland City, so we got in touch.

MC: Wow! Your former school teammate is now in the MLB! Was he that good before?

Kiro: Just so-so. Not better than me, anyway.

Kiro wrinkled his nose, his expression so proud and arrogant that I couldn't help but kiss him as well.

MC: I know. You are the Ace of your school team!

??: No no no, he is not.

??: The Ace of our school team was Raymond. Now he works overtime everyday on Wall Street and he's even gone bald.

A voice with a foreign accent interrupted from the side. I looked back and saw a young man with platinum hair holding a bag of cornflakes, munching on them as he looked at us with interest.

It was Carol.

[CHAPTER 2]

We didn't know when this guy had reached next to us. We both quickly let go of our hands, and Kiro coughed twice in embarrassment.

Carol: Why don't you continue holding each other? Don't mind me, I'll just enjoy watching.

Kiro: .....

Kiro: Can you please stop sneaking up on people all the time?

Carol: Little did I know that just when I'd decided to go to the convenience store to buy some cornflakes, a beautiful woman would show up at the venue.

Carol patted his hands on his pants and stretched them towards me.

Carol: Hello, I'm Carol, an old classmate of Kiro's.

MC: Hello, I'm MC, Kiro's...

Carol: It's what you Chinese people call 'Airen', 'Na Kouzi', 'Duixiang' (lover, fiancée/wife, object of one's affection). I get it.

Carol spoke fluent Chinese and quickly took over my words, winking at me teasingly.

MC: .....

Kiro: .....

I glanced at Kiro. He understood what I was getting at and smiled helplessly at me.

Kiro: He's mother's Chinese, so he speaks Chinese fluently. As for your other doubt... well, he's been this arrogant ever since high school.

Carol: Wow, the two of you could actually communicate so much with just one look. I've only seen that kind of thing is spy movies!

Carol: Boohoo, Kiro, it seems that I'm no longer your soulmate!

Kiro: You've never been my soulmate, okay?

For the first time on Kiro's face, I saw the feelings of "lost", "tired" and "when will this conversation end?". There were so many expressions combined together on that handsome face that if he had a tail right now, it would've been wagging around impatiently.

MC: Pfft...

I suppressed my laughter and quietly poked Kiro with my hand, but he keenly grabbed my finger.

However, after such banter and teasing, the atmosphere between them had relaxed a lot.

Carol: By the way, Kiro, have you thought about what I said before?

Kiro: The charity baseball game?

Kiro: It's possible to make place in my schedule to participate, but I haven't played a game in a long time, and I'm afraid it'll take too long to practice.

Carol: What's there to practice? Just play the way you played at the Dodger Stadium in your sophomore year of high school.

Kiro: Dodger...

Kiro recalled the match and shook his head.

Kiro: Didn't I lose that game? I don't even remember what I was playing at the time.

Carol: How could you not remember?

Carol's eyes widened in surprise and he gestured excitedly.

Carol: I was on first base, you were the batter, and they'd already thrown two strikes. One more pitch and we'd be struck out. As a result, you hit a perfect outfield ball, allowing me to safely return to home base!

Carol: Yes, we lost that game in the end and were eliminated...

Carol: But your most critical point allowed us to go into overtime. That's why I still remember it to this day!

Carol's eyes were shining while narrating this to us, as if he had returned to that arena again.

Kiro probably hadn't been expecting a failed game to be so deeply remembered. His lips twitched and then curled upwards.

Kiro: Well, now that you've said it, I remember.

Kiro: But I'm not sure I can still hit such a perfect shot now.

Carol: Why don't you try then?

Carol put down his bag of snacks, picked up a bat from the side, and pointed at the scoreboard.

Carol: Let me re-experience the majesty of "California's Little Devil"?

Kiro: Sure.

Kiro nodded, but raised both of our hands to Carol.

Kiro: My girlfriend is also going to participate.

-

After going to the venue to rent a set of equipment, I stood in front of the ball machine. As a novice with no clue of the basics, I was worried about trying to do everything in front of two super baseball masters.

MC: Is it difficult to get started with this?

MC: I remember the last time I went to Hitachi High School to watch you play, I spent a long time looking up the rules for baseball, and ended up getting dizzy...

Kiro: No, those rules are only required on the playing field.

Kiro: For now, you just need to swing the bat and hit the ball to win. Easy, right?

Kiro: Don't worry, I've slowed down the speed of the ball server so you can get familiar with it first.

MC: So, what about the batting posture? What are the standards?

Kiro: No, that will happen later. Now, I just want you to join in and have fun. Being able to be happy is the basis for getting started with something, right?

Kiro winked at me, his words calming my emotions. I nodded at him, raised my bat and aimed at the server.

Boom--

Without giving me any time to react, the white ball slipped away from my stick.

MC: .....

Kiro: Hahaha, lower your arms a little, and there's no need for you to face the tee hole, 'cause the trajectory of the ball's a parabola.

MC: Okay!

Boom--

Kiro: Mastering the position in just one shot is awesome! You can swing the bat a little earlier for the next ball, and I guarantee you will hit it!

MC: Okay!

Boom.

Under Kiro's guidance I hit the ball on my third shot.

Although I didn't have much strength that the ball just landed softly on the grounds, and even the score didn't pop up on the scoreboard, it was enough to make me cheer.

MC: Kiro, look, look, look, I hit it!!

Kiro: I saw it. That's great. MC really is a little genius! Then, our next goal is to score a point!

MC: Gogogo!

With Kiro's unremitting praise, I seemed to really feel the joy of playing baseball.

Or it could be said that, not limiting to any sports, as long as he was participating in anything, I would always feel twice as happy.

-

I looked at the five points I finally got on the scoreboard with satisfaction and waved my hand towards Kiro.

MC: I want to practice by myself again. You can go and play too.

I lowered my voice and winked while suppressing my laughter.

Carol, who was peeking at us not far away, saw someone looking at him. He immediately straightened his neck, turned around and pretentiously swung the bag.

MC: ...I suspect that if you don't compete with Carol, he'll be so sore that his teeth will break.

Kiro also glanced at Carol and raised the corners of his mouth proudly.

Kiro: Who told us before that he enjoyed seeing us show affection? Well, of course we have to blind him more!

Having said that, Kiro still carried the bat and went to Carol's side.

The other party stopped looking at the fun and raised his eyebrows at him.

Carol: Are you willing to have a go?

Kiro: [In English] Uh-huh, as usual?

Carol: As usual.

The ball machine made a low buzzing sound, and the two men lined up on both sides, both raising their bats.

Boom!

A crisp and harsh sound rang in my ears.

Unlike the slow ball that the machine threw at me, Carol and Kiro's ball machines were set to the highest speed. When the bats were swung down, the ball hit the scoring area hard like a beam of light reflected back.

Second ball, third ball...

The two of them hit every shot and scored very hard.

I was no longer in the mood to complete my exercises, so I just held my breath and watched the game.

At the eleventh stroke, Kiro suddenly frowned and paused while twisting his waist.

MC: ....!

I suddenly remembered that Kiro had sprained his waist filming an MV last week. Had it relapsed?

Just that moment of stagnation caused the speed of his swing to be half a beat slower that Carol's. And that slight difference made his swing fail.

Kiro: .....

Kiro's movements stopped and Carol also put down his bat. He glanced at the data plate and shrugged.

Carol: Your swinging speed is 113km/h, and your outfield score is 14... You've regressed a bit, Kiro.

Kiro: No, you've gotten a lot stronger.

Carol: Oh, of course. After all, I went through hell in order to join MLB~

Carol stretched, walked over and patted Kiro on the shoulder.

Carol: But you can't say that.

Carol: I'm afraid that kid Raymond doesn't even remember how to swing a bat. If you can maintain this level, you definitely would be able to dominate the charity game in a month's time.

Kiro: Are you using Raymond to provoke me?

Carol: Not really, I'm just stating facts.

Carol: And because this is a fact, I decided to balance the combat power - when the time comes, I'll be your opponent. Otherwise a one-sided game would be too boring.

After Carol finished speaking, he waved at me and walked out the door.

Carol: Bye, Kiro, and Kiro's girlfriend! See you in a month!

After Carol left, I walked over to Kiro and pulled his wrist.

MC: You seemed uncomfortable when you swung the bat just now... Kiro, are you okay?

Kiro: I want...

MC: What?

His voice was so low that I was unable to hear him clearly.

Kiro turned his face, his cheeks puffed up angrily, and his blue eyes burning with fighting spirit.

Kiro: I said... I also want special training from hell!

[CHAPTER 3]

Apple Box: Woo...

Cello: Meow...

The air conditioner pumped out air-conditioning at full power, but the lazy scent of a summer afternoon still covered our entire home. Even Apple Box and Cello, who would usually be playing together, each occupied a cushion and fell asleep.

The only energetic one was Kiro, who was standing in front of the big screen.

Kiro: 33, 34, 35...

After competing with Carol that day, Kiro kept his word and immediately formulated a set of "Kiro-style hell training" for himself.

He couldn't frequent the baseball stadium, so he simply compiled a baseball physical program that he could practice at home, from swinging to catching.

MC: ...69, 70! Stop, it's time to rest!

As soon as the number jumped, I immediately raised my hand and asked Kiro to stop. Kiro calmed his breathing and turned to pitifully look at me.

Kiro: Can I do another set of exercises?

MC: You can't.

I pretended to be serious and decisively refused.

MC: Who applied for two extra sets of training yesterday? Then at night, he was complaining that his back was sore and asked me to help with a massage and the application of medicine?

Kiro: Yesterday, it was because I overestimated myself, so I'll only do one more set today...

MC: N - O. NO.

Kiro: [cute disappointed whine] .....

Kiro drooped his eyebrows and finally turned off the training program on the screen, and sat down next to me.

I knew why he was struggling with the amount of training, but I didn't want to interfere. I just recommended the cut up watermelon to him.

MC: The fruit shop owner told me that the one I picked was the sweetest. Try it?

Kiro: Is that so? Let me try.

Having said that, Kiro turned his wrist and handed the intact piece of watermelon in his hand to my mouth.

MC: Kiro, I want you to eat first...

I swallowed it halfway and thought of a better method.

I lowered my head and bit of the reddest piece on the triangular tip of the watermelon, but I didn't swallow. Instead, I held it between my teeth and looked at him intently.

MC: Mm?

Just a deliberately soft nasal sound was enough of a suggestion.

Kiro's eyelashes trembled, and the next moment, he had already leaned over.

The tip of his tongue rubbed against my teeth and swept away the watermelon. After just a slight squeeze, the abundant juice overflowed between our lips.

The strands of fruit fiber were torn apart in the entanglement, and were swallowed up with the bright pink juice and colorless body fluid.

I pursed my moist lips and smiled triumphantly.

MC: How about it? Am I right? Isn't it particularly sweet?

Kiro gave me a more cunning smile in return.

Kiro: Mm. The first bite was indeed sweet.

He took another bite of the unfinished piece of watermelon, and the vague sound mixed with the sweet fruit covered my breath again.

Kiro: Now, I want to try other places to see if it's just as sweet.

The dormant computer was still humming, and the room was quieter than during training. Our rapid overlapping breaths did not affect Apple Box and Cello's sleep.

After we playfully demolished the fruit plate, Kiro lazily held me in his arms and suddenly squeezed my fingers.

Kiro: [With a soft sigh] Were you feeling bored this week?

MC: Why do you ask?

Kiro: Because since I've been in special training this week, I've hardly spent time with you...

MC: Who said you were hardly with me?

I grabbed my phone and turned the photo album over to him.

MC: You train and I take photos. That's also a way of you being with me.

The photo album not only showed Kiro focusing on training, but also the profile of him watching a video of the game, and a short video of him looking for Apple Box to complain when he was tired...

There were even shots of me catching someone eating in the middle of the night because he had consumed too much energy.

Kiro looked at them one by one, and burst out laughing.

Kiro: I've gotta say, why are you always taking pictures of me with your mobile phone recently? You already have so many pictures. Are you going to make a special training documentary for me?

MC: Uh-huh, that's right~ Do you want to look further?

Kiro moved his thumb forward twice more and clicked on the next video.

Kiro: [In the video] So, not bad right?

Kiro: I can tell from your expression that you love me in this uniform, Miss Chips!

The camera was shaking a little under the scorching sun, and it took a few seconds to focus on the protagonist.

The blue and white baseball uniform, the Japanese banner in the distance; everything in it was obviously from a long time ago, but it seemed like it just happened yesterday. Kiro suddenly opened his eyes wide.

T/n: This is a reference to Kiro's Heatwave Date :>

Kiro: Ah! This is--

Kiro: Isn't this the video you took of me when we went to Hitachi High School to play?

MC: Yep. Because you're playing another game, I found the video of the last game to compare it with the current Kiro.

Kiro: Compare?

Kiro: So what are your comparison results?

MC: Hmm... I'd like to hear your thoughts on shooting the main character first?

Kiro: Well... I felt like I was too young and immature at the time.

MC: Huh, is that so?

By the time the video was played, Kiro was already on the field, running and swinging the bat with ease.

MC: I feel like you were already very mature at the time.

Kiro: ...You're so silly, Miss Chips.

MC: Huh?

Kiro looked at me, a little helpless and a little amused. He pointed at the Kiro on the screen and then at himself.

Kiro: I mean, couldn't you tell how I felt when I changed into my baseball uniform and went to find you?

I shook my head honestly. At the time, my whole heart seemed to be hanging on the upcoming game, and I honestly couldn't tell. How did Kiro feel when he came to see me?

Kiro: Okay, but I'm a little embarrassed to say it now. At the time, I probably... really wanted to "spread my peacock feathers" in front of you.

MC: "Spread your peacock feathers"?

Kiro used such a gorgeous adjective that I found it difficult to combine it with his refreshing appearance in the video.

Kiro: Just... I just try my best to show off in front of you, wanting you to praise me for my awesomeness, wanting your eyes to fall only on me...

Kiro: Isn't that just like a peacock spreading it's feathers?

MC: Yeah?

I rewound the progress bar and watched that section again.

I watched him hold up the brim of his hat, quietly take off his glove and talk about his high school baseball level...

MC: Now that you've said it, I find it seems to be true, hahaha!

I looked at Kiro in the video and then at the Kiro in front of me and couldn't help but poke his cheek with my finger.

MC: Why didn't I see at the time that even our famous superstar had such embarrassing acting skills sometimes.

Kiro: [laughing] That's why I said I was too immature at the time.

MC: So the Kiro of now is a mature enough Kiro?

Kiro: Of course.

His breathing suddenly came closer, and the intensity with which he was rubbing my fingers became a little heavier, and slowly climbed upwards.

Kiro: Because now I will directly "spread my peacock feathers" and express my appeal to MC.

With a click, the phone slipped from the palm of my hand.

Cello suddenly let out a long cry. I subconsciously held his restless hand and nuzzled it.

Kiro deliberately pretended not to understand what I meant this time, and his lips were already touching the corner of my mouth.

Kiro: [whispering] Ignore them. I'm "spreading my feathers".

There was still some residual sweetness of the watermelon on his lips, which was addictive in the heat of summer. The numb stroking was like a feather caressing my body, a little ticklish, and arousing a fine shudder.

The air conditioner seemed to be turned on lower, making me instinctively seek out a hotter embrace and dye myself the same temperature.

In a trance, as if something really bloomed in front of my eyes, I murmured.

MC: So... you haven't said what exactly you want.

In the confusion, Kiro seemed to be smiling.

Kiro: Come and praise me for my training efforts with practical actions. I'd like that very much.

[CHAPTER 4]

Director: The sound is in place and the lights are ready!

The sneakers made a slight squaking sound on the wooden floor and the young girls were already in position holding colorful pompoms. The moment the music started playing the youthful and energetic cheerleading dance blossomed in front of the camera.

Willow: Compared with the first run, the players have made great progress! The filming of "Youth Cheerleaders" has now reached its final phase.

Everyone was very pleased to see the contestants on stage growing up step-by-step and was infected by their enthusiasm.

MC: Yes, it makes me want to learn cheerleading...

Willow: Boss, you can certainly learn.

Willow: Isn't is going to be your Kiro's game in a few weeks? Won't it be great for you to wear a cheerleading uniform and cheer him on?

MC: ...It's not that simple, is it?

Willow: Why not? Look, we have coaches, clothing, as well as promotional and cooperation channels for charity matches. Aren't they all readymade?

Willow said it so confidently that I couldn't help but be moved.

On that green field, just as I have been watching him, he would only look at me among thousands of people.

When that picture appeared in my mind, my face felt a little hot.

Willow was called away by the staff. After standing still for a while, I walked towards the professional consultant teacher for this program.

MC: Hello, I have a new cooperation opportunity. Could we chat after the recording?

Maybe I could indeed give Kiro a surprised.

After my discussion with the consultant, I sent a message to Kiro and rushed to the agreed location.

-

Starting from this week, Kiro's hell training has entered the next stage, with actual practice in the outfield and base running.

He hired a professional coach, rented a baseball field, and practiced every day.

Because I'd been busy recording "Youth Cheerleaders" for the past two days, this was the first time I was going to the baseball field to find him.

As soon as I walked to the door, the doorman greeted me cheerfully.

Doorman: Are you the girl that Kiro mentioned?

MC: Mm. What about him? Has he finished training?

Doorman: Your handsome boy has finished practicing today and should be changing clothes in the locker room now.

I thanked the uncle and hurried to the locker room.

-

Because Kiro had reserved the entire baseball field when he signed the lease, I opened the locker room without much care.

MC: Kiro, I'm here! How was the effect of your practice? --Why do you have so many injuries on your body?

Kiro: ....!

Kiro seemed startled by my voice and hurriedly put down his half-undressed clothes.

Kiro: MC?

I rushed to Kiro in two steps. He had been wearing loose home clothes after returning home for the past two days. I didn't notice that he had so many minor scratches.

Upon closer inspection, there were red marks on his face too.

MC: How did this happen?

Kiro: It's nothing. In actual combat training, these are just minor injuries. When I was practicing rugby in high school, I suffered a lot more injuries than I do now.

MC: Did you practice rugby in high school?

Kiro: Mm. [Loud exhale] At the time I wanted to learn everything and compete in everything. I even trained for a while to win a game.

Seeing that he wanted to change the subject again, I quickly grabbed the first aid kit from the glove cabinet.

MC: I can help treat your wounds while listening to your memories. So you sit tight now and don't move.

Kiro: It really doesn't matter to me - hiss!

I just gently poked him with my fingertips, and Kiro immediately retracted his arms in an exaggerated manner, blinking pitifully.

Kiro: Mm....

MC: Hmph, didn't someone just say that these were minor injuries?

Kiro: It can't withstand your poke. If you poke me, I'll be "seriously injured".

Kiro whispered with a smile, but took off his baseball uniform, revealing the black lining.

The semi-wet lining fit tightly on his thin waist. I swallowed inexplicably and suddenly, and quickly lowered my head to apply the iodine.

MC: We-were you always hit by the ball?

Kiro: There were also cases where I'd fall while running the basses, and get hit when blocking someone...

Although I knew that he had been training a lot during that time, I still felt a little sad when I heard him say it so casually. I half-crouched in front of him and carefully smeared the scratches on his arms with the medicine.

His fair complexion had just been burned by the scorching sun and was glowing with a beautiful layer of pink. When the dark medicine was applied, it seemed like little flowers were dyed on his body.

Kiro: Is this okay..?

MC: It's early. Since you still want to hide your injuries from me, I'm going to be thorough in my checking this time.

MC: Hm, lift up your shirt.

I ordered sternly and gently poked his chest with a cotton swab. Kiro chuckled lightly and rolled up the corners of the lining with his hands.

Kiro: Enough?

MC: [serious blushing face] Higher.

Kiro: Why not take it off?

MC: ...No need?

Kiro: [pouting] Nurse Chips is so mean today.

Kiro trailed off and rolled up his clothes.

A thin layer of wet sweat gathered along the texture of his skin, and every time his chest rose and fell, water droplets would meander downwards along the lines.

When the medicine soaked into the wound, I could clearly hear him taking a shallow breath.

Then he let out a long sigh of relief, and a stream of air blew through my forehead, like a teasing kiss.

Kiro: Could you be gentler?

He must have done it on purpose. I was obviously already very gentle.

My heartbeat sped up inexplicably, and I bit my lower lip, not wanting to reveal my breathing.

The cotton swab was obviously applied on him, yet, for some reason, I felt my body tighten up with slight impatience.

MC: [blushing] Mm, okay, the inspection is over. It seems like these are the only two spots on your body...

Kiro held the hand that I was about to retract.

When my fingers fell, the cotton swab hooked his loosened belt, making an ambiguous dull sound.

Kiro: [in a dangerously low voice] Why are you so perfunctory all of a sudden?

MC: H-how am I perfunctory?

Kiro: [in a ridiculously sinful whisper] 'Cause the wounded hasn't been examined yet.

The next second, I was lifted by one of his hands.

I gave a short exclamation, but my back was already pressed against the bench in the locker room. The sunlight leaking from the skylight separated us, making it difficult for me to see Kiro's expression clearly.

Feeling guilty, I wanted to sit up, but he had already held my knees down.

MC: Wait - wait a minute, Kiro...

Kiro: I won't wait.

MC: [blushing hard] --There's a phone call!

Indeed, there was a buzzing vibration coming from my bag at the moment.

Kiro pursed his lower lip, then picked up the phone and handed it to me.

The call came from the professional consultant teacher of the cheerleading team. It was inconvenient for me to hang up, so I had no choice but to pick up the call.

MC: He-hello?

Consultant: I thought about what you said during the day. Although time is tight, it is not impossible.

Consultant: I've heard that you have some background in ballet and ballroom dancing. When it comes to choreography, we won't do any difficult movements. We'll focus on beauty and neatness to produce effects...

I replied politely, but I honestly didn't think about most of my words at all. I just wanted to end the phone call as soon as possible.

In my daze, all I felt was that Kiro seemed to have stood and left once. There was a clicking sound from the door, and then he came back again.

MC: Okay, Miss Yu, let's arrange it like this...!

A kiss landed on my collarbone without warning. I was so surprised that I almost bit my tongue.

Kiro: [whispering seductively] Hurry up.

My subconscious struggle was firmly restrained by Kiro, and the second urging kiss continued to climb upward. My heart was beating so fast that I didn't even know what I said to the consultant and quickly hung up the phone.

MC: Kiro, you...

The rest of my words were rolled away by the tip of his tongue.

The desire that had been interrupted by the phone call was reignited in the entanglement, and became even more passionate than before.

The afternoon sun is too bright, I thought in a daze.

The sunlight fell on that soft golden color, and it was so bright as it swayed back and forth, that I couldn't help but close my eyes.

The touch was amplified more and more. The back was hard and the kiss was soft.

His breath was scorching, and the bodies touching each other were scalding hot.

My last trace of reason still led me to make one final struggle, and I spoke intermittently.

MC: Didn't you say you wanted me to continue checking? How can I check now...

Kiro: Why can't you check it?

Kiro took my hand with one hand and put it on his shoulder.

Kiro: Actually... there's only one spot on my body that I haven't applied medicine to yet.

Kiro: But it wasn't from me falling here, It was you who left it yesterday.

Several thin scratches were entrenched on the back of his shoulders, and several thin protrusions fit perfectly with my fingers.

Kiro: So help me.

Part 2: HERE

Translation Masterlist: here

[frogmanfae]

Quill Kipps X GN! Reader- coffee date

Summary: Quill Kipps asks you on a date, George hates him, and Lockwood is oblivious. You go anyway and talk about pretty much nothing, which is nice when you have the whole world on your shoulders at any given moment

A/n- this feels rushed to me but I still think it's cute

*Reader pov*

"What did he want?"

"Jeez, George let me come in before you start bombarding me with questions." I pushed past him and set my bag on the floor.

"Well? Did he offer you a job at Fittes? He wants to take you, I knew it!"

"I'm not going to Fittes. Calm down. He just wanted to chat. As acquaintances. Normal people. He didn't offer me a job."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. You can't get rid of me so easily. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go out again. I just came back for my wallet."

I grabbed my wallet and ignored George's glare as I walked back out the door. Letting out a sigh, I went to the local shopping center.

The truth is, I had actually been returning home to just stay there, but Kipps stopped me across the street and asked me out for coffee. I'll be honest, I know my friends hate him, but I think he's a nice guy. He seems genuine enough, especially since his gift faded almost completely and he became a supervisor as opposed to a group leader. He's less stuck up anymore.

However, after I had accepted, I realized I had no clothes to wear to a casual date. My wardrobe was almost exclusively athletic clothes for work and about two very fancy outfits for formal events.

I went through a few stores before I eventually just decided to wear a nice long sleeve v-neck and some nice jeans. Nothing fancy, but better than basketball shorts and a stained hoodie.

Once I got back home, George still seemed upset but didn't say anything as I made my way up to my room I shared with Lucy, but she was on a trip to see her ghost locked friend this weekend, so it was just me. I changed into comfier clothes and got into bed.

It was still early morning, but the sleep schedule of an agent is all over the place. We're mostly nocturnal because we work all our cases during the night. George and Lockwood are likely to be getting to sleep pretty soon too.

We didn't work a case last night so it's a bit of a struggle to fall asleep. I usually get so exhausted I'm barely able to make it to bed at all.

I listen to my surroundings. Lockwood and George are arguing about something I can't make out. There's young children laughing outside. There are some birds singing in the trees by my window. And now it doesn't take long for me to fall asleep.

*time skip*

I get up at eight o'clock pm. A bit of an early day for any of us, but honestly I'd rather not be seen leaving anyway. It's to my benefit George and Lockwood are asleep.

I get dressed in the outfit I bought yesterday. Suddenly, it doesn't seem as nice as it did in the shop. I frown and try to fix it but to no avail. I just sigh and go downstairs, writing a note telling the others I've gone to the library. I grab my bag and begin heading out the door when I hear a voice.

"Where are you off to at such an hour?"

I whip around. "Lockwood! You scared me!" I huff. "Just the library."

"Are those jeans?"

"Yes? What about them?"

"I didn't even know you owned a pair. Why so dapper for the library?"

"I just felt like it. Now can I please leave? They close in an hour and I've still got to walk there."

He motions toward the door. "Have at it. I'll see you later." I turn the knob again. "Oh! One more thing! I don't know who it is you're meeting with, but tell them I said hello." He smiled and ducked back into the library, leaving me there with my mouth agape.

I looked at my watch; 8:30. "Shit!" I run out and get a cab to take me to the cafe Kipps agreed to meet me at. I tip the driver before rushing into the building to see Kipps sitting at a booth alone.

"I'm so sorry I'm late! I got a bit held up at the agency." I sit across from him.

"Oh! It's no matter! I was actually running a bit late myself." He smiled. "One of our new recruits is a bit nervous and I had to calm him down so he didn't quit."

"Goodness that's stressful."

"All in a day's work. What's your drink, I'll go get it for you."

"Oh no I couldn't possibly-"

"I asked you to accompany me, so I'll be the one paying, okay? Now, what would you like?"

I smile. "A (f/d) please."

"Coming right up." He goes to the counter to order both of our drinks.

He returns a few minutes later and slides mine in front of me. "One (f/d) just for you."

"Thank you very much, Sir Kipps."

"Oh please, call me Quill." He waves his hand. "I'm not your rival anymore. Well, not directly."

I nod. "Right, you just train our rivals now." I laugh a bit. "It's alright, I can't imagine I've got much longer with my gift."

"It's not that bad after a while. Sure, at first you think your entire world is collapsing, but you get used to it." He shrugs as he takes a sip of his drink. "But let's talk about something else. I want to get to know you outside of work."

I nod. "I'd like that."

"So... What do you like to do? For fun?"

"Hm... I like going to the movies. And the library. And there's this place in my hometown where you can go to just break stuff, lots of fun."

"That sounds awesome!"

"Right? I'll have to take you sometime, it's brilliant!"

"Does that mean you're interested in this being a regular occurrence?"

"I'm not opposed to the idea." I take a drink. "Though, I didn't tell anyone I was meeting with you."

"Ooh, risky~" he flexed his eyebrows.

I scoffed. "As if. I could take you down if need be."

"Honestly, I don't doubt that." He looks at me.

We both just start laughing. It's nice to finally have some new company that I don't live with.

We stay there for about an hour before he has to go to work. Before he leaves, he hesitantly kisses my cheek. "Give me a ring, will you?"

"Uh- Yeah! Yeah, of- of course." I bumble out.

He chuckles. "I'll see you around."

"Be careful tonight!"

"I always am! But I'll be extra careful! Just for you!" He smiles and waves as he walks out the door. I start my way back home, keeping an eye out for any early visitors.

I get back rather quickly, only to find George standing by the stairs. "Where've you been?"

"Out. Didn't you read my note?"

"I don't believe it. You were out with Kipps weren't you?"

"No. Whats it matter anyway?"

"Because I am essentially your brother, I worry about you."

"There's no need. I was alone and back before the curfew bells rang. It's all fine. Now, if you'll excuse me-" I push past him. "I need to get out of these clothes and into some sweatpants."

I go up to my room and change into my athletic clothes. We don't have a case to work tonight, so it's going to just be a chill night in. I go to the library and sit next to Lockwood.

"How was your date?" He asks, not looking up from his magazine.

"It wasn't a date!"

"If you say so..." He turns the page.

"... It went well."

"Well how splendid." He looks at me. "Mind telling me who it is if you're going on a second?"

"You know, I think I'll wait to disclose such details for a while longer."

I smile. It's refreshing to have something to myself. Nobody demanding for me to share. It's just something for me.

Me and Quill is just my little bit of information. Splendid.

[calethelettuce]

SaSi Prinxiety Week 2/7: Feathered Fallacies

Prompt: Feathered Wings

Tags: @prinxietyweek

Synopsis: [Fallacy (noun): A false or mistaken idea.] Logan does an experiment incorrectly. To put it simply, Roman accidentally gains a pair of silky white wings. Virgil's simping over- I mean admiring how hot the Prince looks with them.

Relationships: Romantic Prinxiety

Characters: Brief Appearance Logan, Roman, Virgil

TW: Small panic attack, Remus being mentioned

~

“Erm…. Logan?”

Logan sat at his desk, working on schedules. He looked up as he heard Roman call his name. “Yes, Roman?” He called back, taking a sip of his coffee- was it actually wine? Who knew.

Roman paced outside the door. “We’ve got a problem!”

Logan leaned back in his chair, raising an eyebrow. “Which is?”

“It’s better if I show you.”

Logan stood up, adjusting his tie and glasses. What in the world could be so important? He unlocked the door, it open. He pauses mid-movement, looking Roman up and down.

“Roman, how on Earth did you manage to gain wings?”

Roman crossed his arms with a huff. “Gee, teach, I wonder. Think about it for a second.”

What- Oh.

Logan internally cringed. “You were nearby when I was working with those chemicals, weren’t you.”

Roman have him a look that clearly meant that he was. “No shit, Sherlock! Fix this right now!”

Roman’s newly gained wings lay folded against his back, the feathers a dove white. They were fairly large, though not large enough to be considered an issue fitting through doors. They were rather beautiful, Logan had to admit, although the princely side clearly wasn’t enjoying it much.

Logan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “This is why I specifically state that nobody is to come near my house when I’m working with chemicals.”

Roman shrugged. “Patton said you might have an extra jar of Crofter’s! I ran out!”

“Terrible excuse.” The blue tied side summoned a clipboard and a pen. “Now, about your issue…” he scribbled a few things down before continuing. “I’m unsure if there is a cure I can conjure this very second. I’ll get back to you when I find one.” Logan went to close the door, but Roman placed a hand on the doorknob.

“What do I do in the meantime? If Remus finds out they’re about to be fried chicken wings.”

Logan thought about it for a moment. “Go to Virgil.” He forcefully closed the door this time, relocking it.

Roman groaned in frustration. “Damn you, scientific laws of the Mind Palace!!”

“I heard that!”

“Oh shi-“

~

“Virgil, stop petting them.”

Virgil ran another hand over the soft and fluffy feathers. “No,” he concluded, “I will not.”

“You’re acting like a five year old right now!”

“Okay, well you’re the one who decided not to listen to Logan!”

Roman felt a shiver run down his spine as Virgil continued to run his hands along the wings.

It wasn’t very often that Virgil was interested in things. But these wings? The greatest thing he’d seen his whole life. Period.

“So you can feel this?” He asked.

Roman was not about to admit he was enjoying this. “Sure can, emo. Can you stop that? I don’t like it.”

Virgil raised an eyebrow with a smirk. “Your face says otherwise, you royal pain in the ass.”

The prince blushed, scoffing. "Does not!"

Virgil rolled his eyes. "Okay, okay, fine." he removed his hand from the feathery limb. "There, are you happy now?"

Roman stared at him. "No." He grabbed Virgil's wrist gingerly, placing his palm back onto his wings. "Keep going."

"You confuse me."

"Just shut up and do it!"

The two sat in silence as Virgil continued to pet Roman's wings.

"They're very pretty," Virgil mused after a while, examining the feathers, "What the hell was Logan even doing that day?"

"I have no idea." Roman adjusted his sash, brushing off any possible dirt or lint that could have gotten on it. "I did see Remus at the door, saying something about 'cephalopods' and tentacles, but that was it."

Virgil hummed in response. "Your wings need to stretch," he concluded, standing up, "They look tense."

"Oh! Okay." Roman stood up as well, observing Virgil's room. Very emo. Just like him. "Shall we head to the Imagination, then?"

"You want me to come with you?" Virgil looked confused.

Roman gave him a soft look. "You're the only side I trust with this right now and Logan's busy. Patton would probably die from cuteness overload, Janus is Janus, and Remus- well, I don't want to become fried chicken."

Virgil snickered. "You got that right. They'd probably taste like glitter."

"Haha, very funny." Roman playfully nudged him in the side. "Now come on! I can sink us out!" He placed his hands on the purple-clad side's shoulders and sunk them out.

Virgil shrieked, not expecting the sudden change of gravity. He latched onto Roman, as he randomly shot out any curse he could think of.

It was certainly different than sinking into Thomas' house.

"Woah, are you okay, Virge?"

Virgil's breathing was rather heavy as he clung onto the prince from the side. "HOLYSHITDON'TFUCKINGDOTHATTOMEAGAINOFISWEARTOGOD-"

“Hey, hey! Breathe.” Roman brought him into a hug, rubbing soothing circles on his back. “4, 7, 8. Remember?” His tone was hushed, soft and caring. “Breathing is good for you, yeah?”

“We’re imaginary you- you dipshit.” Virgil was surprised he even managed to get that sentence out. His chest was tight and gee, was he shaking.

“Focusing on breathing, my prince.” Roman supplied, holding him in a gentle embrace, “you can cuss me out later.”

Roman helped Virgil sit on the ground next to him, keeping a protective arm around him. They were quiet as Virgil focused on his breathing.

The sides sat on a grassy hill, surrounded by flowers. The Imagination’s castle was in the distance, it’s winding and tall towers looking small from their spot.

Roman carefully opened his wings for the first time, being surprised at how big they really were. They looked much smaller folded, he decided. He tried flapping them very slowly as if he already knew how to use them.

Virgil had become much calmer by then, and watching intently.

Roman gave him a bright smile. “I have to admit, they are rather cool.”

“They really are..” Virgil cuddled up to Roman’s side, smiling. “I’m kind of sad I have to see them go.”

Roman chuckled. “Me too.”

The red-sashed side extended a wing, carefully folding it over Virgil’s like a blanket. “For protection,” was what Roman said, “Just in case.”

Virgil scoffed playfully. “Protection from what? Your terrible humor?” He pauses. “…it feels like a weighted blanket.”

Roman beamed. “Well, you look tired, creeping beauty. Why don’t you take a nap? I’ll protect you.”

Virgil blinks up at him. “Oh, okay. If you say you.”

There’s a blissful silence between them as Virgil drifts off to sleep. Roman observes the fluffy clouds, before looking down at his dark and stormy knight. He pressed a gently and loving kiss to the top of Virgil’s head. “Have a good nap, dear.” He whispered with a smile.

Roman wasn’t too happy when Logan called him a few minutes later.

“Not now, nerdy wolverine!”

“But-“

“If you wake Virgil up with how loud you’re talking through this receiver I’ll kick your ass.”

“Okay. I’ll just text you. Don’t do anything stupid.”

Roman rolled his eyes and hung up.

On the other side, Logan rolled his eyes as he grabbed an unopened bottle of red wine. “I can’t deal with this shit right now.”

He drinks half the bottle.

~

Listen, I just wanted some Logan in this- I thought it would be funny

[bunnakit]

man last twilight hit me particularly hard today and i'm still crying after finishing the episode.

i spent a good chunk of my day at my specialist today and it wasn't great. my disease is getting worse. my weekly shots aren't enough anymore. i'm so tired and i can't stop fucking crying.

my immune system is fucked up, i produce too many white blood cells and those white blood cells have chosen to attack my skin. it leaves me with holes across my body - some of my wounds are now over a year old. when they heal they leave atrophic scarring - but they aren't even healing anymore.

the specialist gasped at the sight of me today. (i'd never seen her before, my state of being was new to her.)

"you're bleeding."

"i know."

"you're bleeding like, a lot."

"i know. i take iron supplements, it's okay."

"it's going to get all over your pants."

"it's okay."

"are you in pain?"

"yes. i'm used to it."

"are you in a lot of pain?"

"yes. it's okay."

she was so concerned, so alarmed, and i couldn't help but just smile and laugh it off. if i don't i'll end up like i am now, sobbing at my desk hidden away from my family because there's nothing they can do for me, they'll just hug me and say they're so sorry, they wish there was something they could do. but there's nothing anyone can do, this is just my life now.

"how often do you take your shots?"

"every friday."

"the recommended schedule for that medicine is once every two weeks"

"yes, they increased the frequency for me because i'm stage 3"

"and you never miss a dose?"

"no, i take it on schedule every week."

"i don't think it's working anymore."

i try to be strong about it, most of the time i am - this is just my life now, wallowing about it isn't going to fix it. i'm stage 3, the only thing that will fix it is a cure, but that doesn't exist yet.

i recently had to buy those washable period underwear because one of my year old wounds just won't stop bleeding and i'm so tired of washing the blood out of my pants. i've gotten so good at preventing bloodstains. (a mix of dawn dish soap, water, and baking soda as a pre-soak works wonders)

i bought an antimicrobial soap in bulk last week to prevent infection. it dries out my skin, but it's not as bad as the diluted bleach baths. i have to start using 10% benzoyl peroxide as a body wash. "do you have a fever?"

"no, i check regularly."

"your wounds are really deep, we're worried about you potentially going septic."

"i'm very careful and keep them clean."

i buy bandages and tape in bulk. my allergic reaction to the tape adhesives are the lesser of two evils. sometimes they get so bad i bleed, but it's just an abrasion. it's okay.

and now i have to take another round of antibiotics that make me nauseous.

and they're changing my medication. i'm 'lucky,' a new medication was approved by the FDA recently that shows good results in reducing the symptoms of my disease. but how long will it be before i don't respond to that anymore?

it's another biologic, an immunosuppressant shot, and i'm sure just like last time it's going to make me so, so sick. adjusting to biologics is so hard, it's not totally unlike low dose chemo (obviously there are differences) and last time it made me sick for weeks.

i don't want to be sick. i don't want to take these antibiotics that make me nauseous. i don't want to keep scrubbing the blood out of my pants. i don't want to use the soap that dries out my skin. i don't want to wear perfume to cover up the smell of my dying flesh. i can't even have sex with my husband. we recently went a year without having sex and i know he understands, he gets it, but i can't help but think part of him resents me. we got together when i was 22, when my symptoms were still mild, i got my diagnosis at 25. i quit my office job and lost my insurance. we eloped at 27 so he could add me to his insurance and i could afford my treatment. his family spent the next year asking why we were in such a rush to get married, we didn't know how to explain to them it was because my doctor was preparing to declare me completely disabled.

i don't want to be in pain anymore. it's been almost 10 years.

i'm okay, i'll feel better tomorrow, maybe even in a few hours, but i can see why people kill themselves over this. i'm so tired. i'm so defeated. i have to hope there will be a cure someday, something better than just pushing down the symptoms.

if you read this far thank you. like i said, i'm fine. i just wanted to get my thoughts and feelings out and i'm bad about talking to my family - they worry too much, pity me too much.

[hel7l7]

I’m having a great time missing you

There’s a candle on the table that flickers every time I laugh. Next to me a friend keeps trying to touch my face when I talk. A glass falls over as I slap her hand away. We braid each others hair and gossip about those who went to our high school. The day after my sister hears me about the party. She asks me if I had been drinking. I tell her I didn’t. No drop of alcohol and I was still having a damn good time. It was only when I came home that my phone started burning in my hands again. That I startedwondering about the what ifs. Thinking about the partners of the other girls, and how I always show up alone.

How is it possible to miss something you never even had? How did I lose myself in something that wasn’t even real?

We sit in the train as it speeds over the tracks and I am giggling as I swirl my skirt to show a friend my outfit. She laughs as I show my underwear and comments on my skinny ass. I flip her off and sit down next to her. Listen to her voice as she dwells over two same named boys who both stole a piece of her heart. I tell her I’m not an expert on this but that she should not date her best friend. She agrees on this and shows me pictures of the other boy. It has been only half an hour in company and my hands keep trying to get my phone out of the small purse my sister let me borrow. I keep hoping to see your name on the screen.

What have I done wrong? What can I do to make this better?

I download tinder again. It is stupid. I’m exhausted because I messed up my sleeping schedule. There’s this emptiness in my chest that I can’t seem to fill. My photo galery doesn’t have anything to complete my profile with. I try to find something that doesn’t make me hate myself. My phone ends up somewhere in my bedsheets. I touch myself until I’m bleeding. Empty pleasure on repeat. Not stopping until I am lost in the idea that this is what I am; gross, dirty, unwanted.

It is just that I must be the worst person on earth. It is just that I think that no one will ever really like me.

I’m on the phone with a friend two days later. I’m tired of missing you. Tired of thinking that maybe you think of me too. There was hope in my chest but that fire is slowly burning out. They’ve started telling me it was not worth it. That I was once again making something out of nothing and that it is time to focus on something else. I try.

Letting go has never been something I was particularly good at.

My therapist doesn’t ask me about it. Somewhere deep down I want him to. Want to spill this mess all over the table and have him tell me how to fix this. But we talk about something else instead. I lose myself a little in the past. It helps me forget for a while. My knuckles bruise quite nicely when I let the sadness out.

I keep hoping to see your car somewhere. I keep wishing for some bravery on your side.

There’s a friend at my table who just read all the texts I sent to you when I was angry. She shakes her head a little but hands the phone back with a laugh. I tell her I always have to be a little dramatic. She nods, not understanding but it is fine. We talk about something else, and just like that it is gone. It is fine.

Tell me when did you get so good at disappearing?

I keep dreaming of you. Not in the conscious way but when I fall asleep you always show up somewhere. Some nights wanting me near, others telling me how much you hate me, how bad you need me to stay away. In the morning I force myself to forget. The questions stay unanswered anyway.

Aren’t you just afraid of being seen?

I want to disappear into the shame of ever believing this could be something. Want to talk about how weird this hurts. Nothing really broken. Only shattered hope that I keep trying to piece back together.

The bus to school shows me real life again, reminds me how easy disposable this is. Three weeks ago all of this didn’t even exist at all. Spent all summer trying to let go of you and didn’t expect it to ever come back to me. Class is fine, I worry about something else. About paint colors and how to use them. I don’t really expect you to call anymore.

I’m having a great time missing you but each time my phone rings I hope it is you.

[nekotaetae]

It wasn’t meant to be

Hiiii!!! I have been thinking about this for a long time and I have finally decided to write it. This is not my first fanfic, but it’s the first one in English and about star wars. I hope you enjoy it^^. I don’t know if I’ll have scheduled updates but I do have a lot of ideas, so I hope you like it.

Sumary:  That day didn’t finish as everyone thought it did. They had shot him, he was supposed to be dead, yet someone decided it wasn’t his time. Someone saved him, but that wasn't enough to fix everything.

Next Chapter>>>

Masterlist

Nothing. That was all he saw. All he felt, heard or smelt. Absolutely nothing. He didn’t remember his name, who he was or what he had done. He didn’t know what led him to be in this ‘situation’. He didn’t know what to do, or if he had to do something, so he waited and, after what felt like hours, he knew he despised waiting. And at that exact moment, he heard it.

“Come oooon, you have to be alive, please be alive” said someone impatiently really close to him.

“He is alive, I’m basically doing that job for him. But if we don’t speed this up he definitely will be” said another more calmed voice.

“We have to get him outta here before reinforcements come and get him in a bacta tank, let’s go”declared the first voice, this time with more confidence before whispering “Don’t worry buddy, we’ve got you covered”

Then the voices faded again, and nothingness welcomed him back.

*

The low levels of Coruscant were everything the Republic wanted to hide, and that was why it was the best place to hide, more so if you had a couple of contacts who could help you with that.

Yennes had been hiding from the Coruscant Guard for a week now since she stole thousands of credits from a corrupt senator. Not having a team had its perks, everything depended solely on her, and when something didn’t go as planned it wasn’t because some dikut did the exact thing she told them not to do. The mercenary had experience working with that kind of people, so it was a long time ago when she decided to go solo except on specific occasions. This had proven to be the best option, unless you were being chased by dozens of clones, in which case having a friend was really useful.

And that’s where she was at the moment. Asajj Ventress was not exactly what one would call a friend, but they had worked together a couple of times, and Yennes was greatly surprised when everything went perfectly according to plan. The best way to describe their relationship was ‘occasional colleges’.

The squamatan had been living in the mercenary world since she was merely a child, so she didn’t lack contacts, bust most of them were the opposite of discrete or weren't on Coruscant at the moment and, those who were, didn’t owe her a couple of favors, so that’s how the situation with the ex-Sith came to be.

“You really should look into your targets more if you are going to end up like this” said Asajj while looking through the window looking

“With a lot of money” asked jokingly Yennes, who was laid down in her friend's bed looking at the ceiling and bored out of her mind.

“With half the guard after you” chastised the bounty hunter looking directly into Yennes’ yellow eyes “I’m going to ask around if someone has seen anything, these last days has been difficult to see a clone around here. You and your blue ass stay here, it won’t take to much time”

The squamatans were not a very known race, so she frequently stood out in crowds. They were humanoids with blue skin patterned with thin lines across their faces and a knobbly ridge running from the bridge of the nose to the back of their skull, separating their black hairline. They also had yellow eyes, pointed ears and two pointed teeth that could shoot acidic venom. Yennes didn’t know a lot about her race or culture, after all, her homeplanet wasn’t really the ‘advanced’ type. She was raised by a bunch of mercenaries who rescued/kidnapped her when she was a child. She loved them, they were her family after all, but she really hoped they didn’t hear about her current situation because she wouldn’t hear the end of it.

Time passed and Yennes started growing restless, after all, she hated not being able to do anything. She had been pacing for at least fifteen minutes when Ventress came back.

“The coast is clear. You can go out now” said the moment she stepped into her small apartment.

“What?! What do you mean?!” asked incredulous

“Exactly what I said” said while shrugging just before closing the door and heading to the small kitchenette.

“So, they’ve been looking for me tirelessly and now they give up?” asked Yennes following her. The Coruscant Guard was nothing if not efficient, they never left anything undone, she would know as she had already had a good amount of problems with them.

“Yes. They seem to be too occupied chasing a rogue clone” said Ventress making Yennes really curious “I have no idea what has happened but they are all looking for him and- Oh no, no way. You are not going to chase that clone” said Ventress after realizing what was going on in the squamatan’s head.

“Why not?! He is a ‘rogue’ clone for a reason. Aren’t you curious?” asked with a childlike curiosity

“You are out of your mind. Haven’t you heard the saying ‘Curiosity killed the loth cat?’”

“But satisfaction brought it back to life. Come oooon, he probably has some shit on someone important that we could use” tried negotiating the mercenary while getting closer to her “Aaaaand, after all, you still owe”

“What?! You’ve basically lived here for a week and I still owe you?!” Ventress asked, growing angrier by the second “You do know that I could kill you right?” threatened getting dangerously closer, before Yennes stopped her pointing her index finger upwards

“I’m perfectly aware, you have a shiny sword, but, first of all, I got you this apartment, that counts as one. Second of all, remember what happened a month ago on Lothal?”

“Oh for the Force's sake! You are insufferable!” shouted Ventress, stepping back and applying pressure in the bridge of her nose “This is the last time you are saying I’m in debt with you” warned pointing her finger to Yennes’ chest.

“Deal, you owe me nothing more. Now, come on!” shouted the squamatan excited while walking to the door,

"Do you even know where you're going?" asked, making Yennes stop in her tracks." Follow me you dikut, I heard something about a storage"

They walked in silence through the streets until they arrived at an area full of supposedly abandoned storages. The eerie atmosphere surrounded everything around them and nothing could be heard except the occasional rats that crowded the lower levels. They kept walking, looking for something that would give them a clue until Ventress stopped suddenly and pointed at a certain storage “There”

Both of them started walking towards the place and Yennes started looking for a way to get into it. “We should enter through a window so no one detects us. There’s a ladder up there that we could try and reach-” said ladder interrupted her by suddenly going all the way down “Or you can do that” shrugged before bowing to her colleague “Force users first.

They climbed the ladder without barely any effort and entered through a broken window on the upper floor. If the place looked in bad shape outside, inside was as if a hurricane, earthquake and explosion happened. The upper floor was filled with dust, abandoned machinery and lots of chains hanging from the ceiling and, right in the middle, there was a huge hole where the lower level could be seen, and where things were escalating quickly.

“Organic chips built into our genetic code, to make us do whatever someone wants, even kill the Jedi. It’s all in here” a clone frantically says pointing to his temple while talking to another clone and what appeared to be a jedi, both caged in a ray shield.

“Let’s just get you some help first. Then we can review everything. It’ll be okey Fives. We’ll sort this out.” said the jedi as calm as he could

Yennes felt how Ventress tensed by her side and started quietly cursing “Something wrong?”

“That’s Skywalker. I’ve fought him several times. We should go, this isn’t going to end pretty” said before trying to stand up, but having her arm caught by Yennes

“That is precisely why we shouldn’t, he might need help” tried convincing her.

“You can’t do shit against a Jedi honey, and besides, you are a mercenary, aren’t you supposed to not care about anyone besides yourself?”

“Fuck you Ventress. Do what you want, but I’m staying”

Yennes let Ventress go and went back to watching everything unfold. The ex-Sith never understood this woman. She had lived a life of crime all her life, that was easy to know just looking at how she moved between the shadows and how many people she knew, and yet she was kind and compassionate. Every mercenary and bounty hunter she had met since she joined the guild was selfish, mostly arrogant and probably assholes, that’s why she didn’t dislike Yennes, she was sure she wasn’t going to stab her in the back. She did dirty jobs without a problem, yet she had a side that was simply put, good. That same side was the one making her stay out of curiosity and kindness towards someone she had never met.

Ventress didn't have friends, didn’t want them either, but Yennes was the closer she had to one, so she sat back beside her and waited till everything finished “You are going to get yourself killed one of these days seeing how stupid you are”

“He's in on it! I don’t know to what extent. But I know he orchestrated much of this. He told me in the medical bay.”

“He told you? When you tried to assassinate him? You have gone too far Fives. The Chancellor isn’t capable of what you claim.”

“The Chancellor?” whispered Yennes incredulously before addressing Ventress “That can’t be, it would be huge.

“Why not? Ask yourself, why were the clones created ten years ago if there wasn’t a war going on. Same with droids. Everything was ready from one day to the next” answered Ventress coldly, thinking aloud about it, but her thoughts were interrupted by a blaster shot.

“Fives! Fives!”

“Get this ray shield off!” shouted the jedi just before a clone shot the ray shield, freeing them and letting the other clone run to his brother.

“Fives. Brother. Call for help! We need a medic!” shouted that clone before Fives started talking, but both women couldn’t hear anything of what he was saying

"Shit, he's going to die, can't you do that weird thing?" asked Yennes worried

"Not without being noticed by Skywalker, probably"

"Probably?!"

"We have time"

" Oh, I know we do, but he doesn't" said irritated

"Look, the important part is the brain. We have at least 10 minutes until it is irreversible. If they take him out of here, I'll try"

"Okey" said without being fully convinced. She really did hate not being able to do anything. But something wasn't right. Clones called each other 'brother", they looked after each other, she had seen that with her own two eyes, and yet that clone had been shot without a second guess. Then there was the guard that shot he hadn't moved since he had done it, he seemed in shock, looking at his hands like he couldn't believe what he had done.

What that clone, no, not that clone, his name was Fives, what he was talking about. Could it be true? And if it was, how big was it? Yennes never liked politicians, most of them were liars and corrupted, but this complot was insane, completely unbelievable. Yet what seemed like a loyal soldier was dying just for believing it. “Fives? No…Fives. Come on, Fives. Don’t go. Stay with me. Stay with me. Fives, don’t go.” cried the clone while holding his brother closely before others tried to take the body away from him.

The clone had to be restrained by the Jedi while the Coruscant guard took the body, and that was the last thing she saw before Ventress took her arm and pulled her towards the window. They descended down the stairs and silently followed the guards, who were boarding into two different ships. The moment they started taking off Ventress threw Yennes to the ship with the body in it and then jumped after her. The four clones inside were shocked for a second, a second the mercenary and bounty hunter took advantage of and knocked them out quickly. The ship hadn't ascended too much at that moment, so Yennes jumped into a storage’s roof and rolled in the floor so she didn't hurt herself. Ventress took the clone’s body and jumped after her, leaving the body on the floor the moment she could and started healing him and breathing for him.

Yennes quickly moved closer to the clone without knowing what to do, just hoping he would wake up "Come ooooon, you have to be alive, please be alive"

"He is alive, I'm basically doing that job for him, but if we don't speed this up he definitely will be." said Ventres fully concentrated on her job.

"We have to get him outta here before reinforcements come and he definitely needs to go into a bacta tank, let's go” said Yennes better analyzing the situation. She passed one arm under his knees and the other behind his back and started carrying him while Ventress kept him alive "Don't worry buddy, we've got you covered".

"Where are we taking him?" asked Ventress

"I know a guy. He might be a dick and a mafia boss, but we've known each other for some time. We'll take his tank" answered Yennes while she carefully took Fives down the scaffolding behind the storage they were in. "It's close, we'll arrive in a couple of minutes".

[thewickedkat]

i do not enjoy Christmas. anyone who knows me at all, even in passing, knows this. but it isn't because of Trauma, or Loss, or [insert Angsty Thing here].

i do not enjoy it because it is fucking exhausting.

allow me to indulge in story time.

when i was a kid, there was all the magic of Xmas--snow, time off from school, decorations, presents, the mysticism of coming downstairs on Xmas day to find the cookies you had left out for Jolly Sandy Claws inexplicably devoured save for one cookie that had only one bite out of it, as if he had gotten full or was on a right schedule. it was neat, wondrous, magical.

then, when i was six, my parents started to not hide the difficulties they were having, and by then i knew Jolly Sandy Claws was more of a spirit rather than a dude who snuck into houses via a chimney to leave prezzies (our house had no chimney so i was already calling shenanigans before this). family stuff started to be more of a 'keep the peace' ordeal rather than super-happy-fun-time. every holiday was more of a 'when are they gonna kick off' rather than chilling and having fun--and i had no buffer other than me, as i am an only child. then my dad went into rehab when i was seven and served divorce papers. my parents officially split-split when i was nine and me and mum moved out to Indiana.

holidays then became another ordeal where i had to choose who to spend it with. now, mum never put pressure on me if i picked coming back out here to dad's; she never made me feel guilty. dad, on the other hand? oh boy, did he ever. i became his surrogate for all the issues he still had with regard to my mum, because he had all the emotional maturity of a bowl of overcooked pasta. Xmas had long stopped being a thing to be excited about. it sucked, because loads of my friends were like 'you get two Xmases!' and i was like, 'no, i get a mum doing her best and a dad who wants me to play messenger owl, fuck off.' mum and i stopped putting up decorations when i was in middle school, because she too had her own mental health struggles and we were both Tired with everyone trying to be the Whos in Whoville around us. we just wanted to be Grinchy and be left alone for our own stuff.

over the years i just...dealt with it, that i didn't like the holidays, and all the pressure, and 'oh it'a family! and family is beautiful!' mine wasn't, and i was tired of pretending it was, and so very fucking tired of pretending that it was a bad thing that my family had warts and issues and just wanted to be Grinchy. because it isn't something to be ashamed of. we don't do Xmas anymore. we get excited for Halloween, or having just...a night where we order Chinese takeaway and watch bad musicals and get drunk and sing along. we're just wired differently, is all.

and in American culture, not doing cultural Things like Xmas or Thanksgiving or whatever is seen as bad or weird and if you don't like them, then there's either something wrong with you, or you were somehow 'damaged' as a kid, or you're a terrible fucking Scrooge cynic ranting about capitalism and whatnot (which is its whole other thing as retail during this season is a special kind of hell as we all know) and if you are the latter, it's because you somehow wanna shit in everyone else's cornflakes--not because the vibes of this time of year are exhausting and hang over everything like the smell of someone else's broccoli fart.

i got over feeling cheated a long-ass time ago. i made peace with it. and when i say 'i don't enjoy Xmas,' it is still taken as an opportunity for someone else to try and 'fix' my disdain for it. it isn't something that needs to be fixed. it is a feature, not a bug. in our house, my partner and i do not put up a tree. we do not decorate. we get meats and cheeses and gorge ourselves on those whilst watching the best Xmas film ever, Die Hard (no, i will not accept criticism, it is a holiday film and you cannot change our minds).

i am at peace with my contempt for Xmas. i am fine with it. i am not damaged by it, i was not 'cheated;' it was something i lost enthusiasm for and it isn't due to loss or anything like that. i feel particularly grateful that i am not in the same boat as many other folks, for whom this time of year is especially difficult due to loss or trauma or not having someone they love to spend it with.

please, think of those folks first during these times, or others less fortunate than i am, who need to be reached out to for a hug or a gift or a warm meal or a chance to make better memories. they need it far more than i do. i am privileged enough that i do not have a 'holiday deficit' that needs to be made whole.

above all, have a good holiday, whatever you may or may not celebrate at this time of year. i will be at home with my partner and our maniac cats watching Alan Rickman and Bruce Willis in one of their best roles. our lack of yuletide cheer does not mean that you cannot take joy in belting out Mariah Carey, or shopping, or putting up your own lights. it's fine. we're fine. really.

[iamdrowninghelpme98]

Entry 14:

2024

~~~~~~~~~~

It’s been a couple of months since I left him again, but it’s harder than I thought it would be. I keep waiting for the whole “it gets easier with time” thing to kick in, but it hasn’t. I’ve only seen him once during that time- recently, when I had to go back to his home state for a previously scheduled doctors appointment. He invited me over for dinner, said I could take more of my clothes and other things if I came by. We’ve only really communicated through texts before that, just here and there. I know I shouldn’t be talking to him, and I definitely shouldn’t have seen him. But I felt like I could handle it.

When I arrived back in his home state, my mindset wasn’t great. The appointment that brought me back to him was because of him. A while back, he hit me so hard that my eardrum ruptured. At first, I was told it would heal on its own, but then, two weeks later, he did it again during another fight. Since then, I’ve never heard the same out of that ear. The muffled sounds, the ringing- it’s like a constant reminder of what happened, what he did. All because my male coworker gave me a ride home, my husband was too high to come get me, and I was too weak to attempt to walk. So now I can’t hear right. I couldn’t afford to get the procedure done back then, and I sure as hell can’t afford it now. But at least I had it looked at by a doctor when I got there. They told me I could get a low-duty hearing aid for cheap, but even that’s out of reach. I don’t even have a dollar to spare.

Money is so tight. I’m so fucking poor. Normally, I’d just go back to the strip club and do what I have to do. But I can’t now. It’s too dangerous for my sobriety. It’s too soon. Every day is still a battle to stay clean, and I’m not ready to be in that environment. The club is full of men, and other dancers, constantly putting drugs in my face. Even if I could be strong enough to resist, I can’t stomach the idea of working there sober. It’s depressing. The things I have to do there? I can’t survive doing them with a clear mind. I can’t. But I need money. I’m already not eating every day- what else can I cut out? I’m in over my head. And still, I can’t go back there, not yet. I don’t want to, I’m trying to hold out.

I don’t want to relapse again. I really really don’t want to relapse again. I’ve come so far. I’ve even thrown away my “emergency baggie.” That baggie had a gram of heroin and fent in it. I’d kept it hidden for weeks- just in case. But I flushed it two nights ago. That was the first time in a long time I felt proud of myself. A victory, even if it was a small, quiet one. No one was there to share that moment with me, but it meant everything. A few months ago, I would have done anything for that baggie. Those drugs were my life. But I’ve worked so fucking hard to make it this far. I don’t want to live like that anymore. I don’t want to be a junkie. That life is hell. Absolute fucking hell.

At this point, I’ve made it past the physical withdrawals, and I never want to go through that again. I don’t think I’ve ever been sicker in my life. I honestly think I would have died if I hadn’t gotten help and gone to rehab. The vomiting, the shaking, the constant pain- I went through that for days. I was burning up and freezing at the same time. My head was pounding, and the withdrawal felt like it was ripping through my whole body. I couldn’t even sleep. I pulled out clumps of my own hair, screamed, cried. I couldn’t keep water down, couldn’t even take care of myself. So many times, I almost gave up.

On one of my worst days, this guy who had 100 days sober stopped by my room and said, “Give it 30 days. If you don’t like sobriety, you can trade for all your pain and misery back.”

Pain and misery. That was the life of a junkie. That was my life. Every day, waking up, wondering how I was going to get my next fix. The shaking, the full-body fucking shaking when I couldn’t get my hands on what I needed. And I needed that reminder, because it wasn’t any better back then.

I celebrated 60 days sober recently- 60 days without heroin or fent. I still can’t really believe it myself. It feels so good to say it, even if I’m just typing it out. Kind of a bummer, but no one came to my 60 day ceremony. I asked a few people, but no one showed up. I of course couldn’t tell anyone how much that hurt, but it did. They all had other things to do, that’s valid. But deep down, I fear they just don’t want to be part of this process, maybe because they think I’ll let them down again. I understand, but it still would’ve been nice not to be alone.

Everyone else at the ceremony had someone there. Family, friends. I was happy for them. Not all addicts get abandoned, I guess. It was heartwarming to see. I ended up Ubering to the ceremony myself. I wasn’t even going to go at first, but I’d worked so hard for those 60 days. I didn’t want to miss it. I didn’t want to let myself down. But of course, I couldn’t even afford the Uber ride back, so I walked for over an hour on an empty stomach, but it was so worth it.

It would be nice to have a sponsor. Someone who could have been there with me. Someone who would be proud of me. Maybe then I wouldn’t have felt so alone. But I don’t know who I would ask, that’s not exactly a position anyone is dying to fill.. and I don’t blame them.

Dinner with my husband was… okay. He brought takeout to his house, and I was so relieved to see a big meal. I hadn’t eaten in three days, but I couldn’t let him know that. So, I forced myself to eat slowly, trying to hide my enthusiasm. The whole time, I felt like a starving animal pretending to be civilized.

During dinner, he made me a proposal: come back home, stop divorce proceedings, and we start over. He said we could go to counseling together, but in exchange, I would have to give him my phone. For how long, he didn’t say, and I didn’t ask. He gave me a month to decide, but if I came crawling back after that, he said he wouldn’t go easy on me. He never does anyway.

I’m almost certain he stole my ID out of my purse that night. When I got to the airport, I couldn’t board my plane home. I had to scrape together what little non-existent money I had left for a bus ride. That’s just him- trying to control the situation, to keep me from leaving, I should have expected that.

And now I’m sitting here, wondering if I’m actually considering his proposal. I don’t know. Maybe I am. Maybe I’m too tired to fight anymore.

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 256

Alpha and Omega

Because I forgot to download today’s spn episode and because it’s Destiel’s 15th anniversary (of when they met), we’re just doing one episode today…and definitely not because I want to start the One Piece anime……….

“Alpha and Omega”

Plot Description: the team scrambles to form a plan that can stop Amara and preserve the universe, but one of them will have to make a big sacrifice

“Carry On Wayward Son” gets neglected again…fine. I’ll do it myself *opens Spotify*

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: no one died

Ok but why would Cas know where Lucifer went after Amara ripped him out? I didn’t know where my teeth went when I had to get a couple pulled as a kid. Frankly, I didn’t even know they’d been pulled, I thought the dentist had to go get bigger pliers

I have zero sympathy for god…..

Now might not be the time to ponder on canine eating schedules, but at least “I didn’t know dogs had breakfast” is the most solid proof that Castiel is in fact back

I don’t know what I’m supposed to be seeing in the sky there. It looks DIFFERENT, sure but I’ve literally seen worse. This year.

I swear if Cas never gets to confront god himself I’ll be so fucking mad

“If you got something for me to punch, shoot, or kill, lemme know, and I’ll do it. I’ll do it til I die, but how are we supposed to fix the friggin’ sun?” They really wanted me to take that line seriously and not laugh

Why are we in London all of a sudden?? Who is she?? And why is she after Sam and Dean??

Rowena and Chuck talking about parenting is a much needed moment of levity, especially paired with Crowley being thankful the world is ending, hearing about himself at one year old

I’m just confused what Sam wants them to ACTUALLY do. “Anything” is not a real counter

Where ARE Dean and Cas going?? Beer run? Joy ride?

Behold, the face of a man whose crush just told him “you’re our best friend” and “you’re our brother.”

What an interesting solution. And honestly, I should have seen it coming. You can’t have just either darkness or light. Both have to be in existence equally….but what if equally….meant none at all?

Rowena’s eye makeup is fucking gorgeous, but omg did she really just say “if you get me enough souls, I can build a bomb”??? I am equal parts “this is a ridiculous line” and “LET. HER. COOK!”

I can’t believe we’re gonna try to vacuum some ghosts out of an old mental hospital to get some souls

Oh I bet the person…….I was wrong. Omg. The Reaper that wants Sam and Dean dead. All she DOES is collect souls!

If this pigeon feeding old lady convinces Amara to not destroy all of existence, I’ll scream

I’m…unwell at the thought of Dean being the bomb. They’re gonna shove hundreds of thousands of souls into him……and half of what I’m thinking about is when Castiel took all the souls out of purgatory and the parallels and how they’ll be the only two with that kind of experience. The other half is don’t let Dean sacrifice himself!! Billie’s gonna take him to the Empty and he’s not the only one with a PERSONAL CONNECTION TO AMARA. Chuck is literally right there

One day, I’ll figure out how to put eyeshadow or more liner under my eye without it looking bad. I want to make this look work. It’s stunning

Oh are we getting the London lady again? For like ten seconds……

Take those souls out of Dean and do it yourself, you fucking coward

“I could go with you” CASSSSSSSSSSSS

Watching Dean say goodbye to Sam is so hard. After all the times they’ve fought tooth and nail to keep the other from dying…to have this air of acceptance because it’s for the sake of all existence

Why are all these family therapy sessions led by one or more Winchesters working so well??

Guess the sun’s back…so what does Dean do with all those souls now?

The way Cas’s first thought upon seeing the sun back was about Dean

So Amara heals Chuck, Chuck takes the souls out of Dean, and then Chuck leaves again

One, I can’t believe that lady just shot Sam, Two, I can’t believe Amara and Chuck just left Dean stranded……EXCUSE ME?!?! What I really am having trouble grasping is MARY’S BACK?!!