#like... it's so easy to blame a mental illness on something bad than it is to look at the system and say it's failing

[sneckoil]

ok so i haven't watched housemd since i was a kid and just finished s1 and i am just. why is cameron written like that. genuinely her thing with house had me so completely lost this season. feels like a waste of a great actress but?? maybe I'm wrong?? she just feels so. empty as a character to me. regardless i would love to know what your opinion is on the character bc from what i remember it doesn't get better from here

I dont blame you ban-joey and I really appreciate your courage to send this off anon. We probably have the same experience. I watched house as a kid too (when I was 14, like 10 yrs ago) and hated her for being contrarian and inconsistent and in the way. But since then i’ve looked inward and found i was imposing double standards wrought by internalized misogyny. Anyway.

My opinions on cameron:

Number 1, if i were her i would shoot my shot with house too. excuse me. as if most of us on here are not just twenny… thirty somethings pining after old men. happily going on a monster truck date? getting a date in return for the old man to have me back on my team? Yeah. I respect the hustle. fuck that old man or whatever. marry him when he’s sick. phantom thread him

Number 2, liking Cameron is easy once you accept. That she is really really really not normal. I know this may be something you already know. But internalize it. She says something righteous but it doesnt mean that that is her defining trait. There is something so deeply wrong with her. I know you’re still on season 1 and Yes she Gets Worse but if you are working with the same lens as i am (that there’s something WRONG with her) then everything that happens makes sense. [spoilers] Of course youre only attracted to people when they’re sick and dying. Of course your reaction to being told youre boring is getting high on your patient’s drugs a few weeks away from your HIV test results. Of course you wanted to cheat on your dying husband with his best friend who comforted you while your husband was dying but you didn’t and you still haven’t after the fact he died. Of course you kept your dead husband’s sperm. Of course you wanted to kill a dictator but didnt, and then got pissed at your husband who Did kill him, a husband you actually felt nothing for and was hesitant to even let propose to you [/end spoilers] she’s so funny. If she were a guy they’d call her a messy bitch and love her for it. she has uncategorizable mental illnesses masking as a savior complex.

Number 3, you’re right about the emptiness on some level though. They wanted to write her out of the show and they did her so bad. And I’d say yeah she’s inconsistent as a character, but that goes for Everyone in this show. House isn’t consistent. Wilson isn’t consistent. None of them are consistent. Cameron is only as well-written as the writer who knows how to write her. I’ve suspected the only reason i hated her when I was 14 was she got in the way of hilson. But nowadays that stuff is so unserious to me. All i care about now is messy people being messy about other people

Number 4, she compels me. I like that she’s interesting. I don’t like most of her decisions, I disagree with her the most, but it’s interesting. She’s fun to Watch. She’s no Foreman (that guy is a case study in layers of character depth but that’s for another ramble) but that’s more than i can say for her than someone like, say, Chase LMAO

That being said if you dont like cameron then that’s fine 👍 we live in a society etc etc

I end with this (thank you jackie for putting this image on my feed)

[prodigal-explorer]

I disagree with the idea that basil is unforgivable because the entire point of Omori is forgiveness and grief.

To say that basil is irredeemable is to go against the theme of the game

homie...

hate to break it to you but actually the point of the game being forgiveness and grief doesn't mean that every character should be forgiven. everybody has different standards and morals and values when it comes to forgiveness. some people are able to forgive basil and others aren't, but the people who are able to forgive aren't inherently better or more "right" than the people who cannot. to say that the message of omori is "you should always forgive people no matter what they do to you" is brain-dead.

just because sunny and basil smiled at each other doesn't mean that all that damage was reversed, or that true forgiveness even happened.

the point of omori is not forgiving others.

it's forgiving YOURSELF.

that's why aubrey, kel, and hero's explicit reactions to the truth weren't shown in the game. because it's not supposed to be canon that they forgave sunny and basil. and the lesson is NOT that kel, aubrey, and hero SHOULD forgive sunny and basil.

it's easy for sunny and basil to forgive each other because they both royally fucked up each other and their friends.

what's not easy is kel, hero, and aubrey forgiving them because unlike sunny and basil, they had ZERO CHOICE in the matter when it came to the presentation of mari's death. they spent four years living a lie.

hero blamed himself, believing that he was a horrible boyfriend who caused mari's death by not being there for her and he was extremely depressed for years, which caused him to lose motivation for his number one favorite thing to do:

cook. as a result of hero's depression, kel was pushed aside and ignored by his parents, becoming something like a glass child to them, which led to him viewing himself as less important or worthy of love/attention than hero.

and don't even get me started on aubrey. the whole town turned against her, and nobody cared about her. not even her friends. the only person in the world who truly understood her was mari, and seeing her hung was the worst possible thing to happen to aubrey, a mentally ill little girl who already believed she was bad for everyone who cared about her.

if basil had JUST TOLD THE TRUTH. all of his friends' lives would have been infinitely better.

and i don't mean to like rag on basil without addressing sunny, but i never see sunny stans acting this idiotic and "holier-than-thou". now since you're so up in my business, i will explain myself more.

the biggest unforgiveable thing isn't even basil hanging mari. it's basil blatantly lying, and staying silent for four years, pretending to be innocent, painting himself as some victim, when really, the whole time, he was the reason why everything crumbled and destroyed itself.

it would be fucking stupid to walk out of playing that game saying, "well, aubrey, kel, and hero need to forgive basil for what he did because forgiveness is important."

that's easy for BASIL LOVERS to say because BASIL WAS NOT THE VICTIM IN THE SITUATION. HE WAS THE PERPETRATOR.

and furthermore, the game emphasizes self-forgiveness way more than forgiving others.

things only started to get better for basil and sunny when they started to forgive themselves. sunny's hallucinations were a manifestation of his shame and guilt. and shame and guilt are a result of being unable to forgive yourself. what the other characters did to support sunny was helpful, but it didn't solve the root of the problem. the only thing that really made something go away, the only thing that really brought color back to sunny's world was him letting go of that shame and guilt and allowing himself to keep going forward.

THE ENTIRE POINT OF THE GAME IS THIS: you cannot control how others react/respond to your bad actions. you cannot expect forgiveness out of anyone, and sometimes, you SHOULDNT. but the one thing you can control when you fuck up is how you pick yourself up and dust yourself off. how YOU move on from what you did so that you can grow and become a better person in the future.

and to me, that is a way more relevant, impactful, and TRUE message than the stupid, idiotic, honestly super problematic idea that "we should forgive and forget when people hurt us because they feel guilty". that's not being a good person. that's being spineless and devoid of values. just because i personally have experiences, traumas, and values that make me unable to truly forgive basil doesn't make me a bad person or someone who failed to understand the game's message. so before you come up in my ask box and attempt to shame me and accuse me of not understanding the game, brush up on it yourself, buddy.

[theambitiouswoman]

Hi, I found your tumblr recently and I...need help. I don't have a lot of people to talk to. Not my mom, siblings, no one. I'm kind of the dark horse in the family. But long story short, is it wrong to have thoughts that can take your life permanently if you've always been alone because of your mental illness/disability? I have been taking steps to improve, like watching self-help videos and talking to therapist but I am deemed "unhelpable" or "unsaved". I didn't know depression and multiple personality disorder can make therapist stop talking to you. Sorry, just need a strong voice

Hi friend, I wanted to answer you because I didn't want you to feel ignored. However, I am not equipped to really advice you on this. I am really sorry that you are going through this. Depression can be extremely debilitating and it is something you can't force your way out of. In my humble opinion, I think this adds more stress on you. I am the dark horse of my family too and it has always been difficult to have them understand me. I am also always the one to blame for problems too. Which can feel very exhausting on its own, but especially worse when we are not emotionally in a good place.

I think, thoughts like the one you mentioned are more common than you think. Intrusive thoughts are dangerous. I don't know exactly but more than 1/4 of people suffer with depression at least once in their life. As for the intrusive thoughts, I think it would be good for you to decide in your mind that you are going to have these thoughts. This way you can talk yourself through and out of them.

You should not feel this way. And honestly I feel so bad that you do. It seems like you are making an effort to work through this. And you are right, I agree. Videos, books and talking to people can only do so much.

I know I am very tough love on here, but the reality is, there is no timeline for you to get through this. I just know and believe that you can. It won't be easy. But you have to try to make an effort to do the best you can every day, with whatever you can. Just try. Even if you don't get very far. That is okay.

I think its very important for you to rebuild yourself, and this involves looking at the situation differently. So maybe start there. You are in this position and you want to get out of it. Try to make an effort, when you can to begin exercises that will help you feel good about yourself. From exercise, to working on a hobby or talent you may have. To something as simple as getting dressed. Yes, I know sometimes we literally just can't. But trying even in your mind, starts to switch the chemistry of your brain. This is important because the first person who needs to recognize how valuable you really are, is you.

In regards to therapy, have you tried seeing another therapist? Maybe that therapist specifically is not equipped to deal with your specific situation. Which is actually a real thing, so it is not a reflection of you being hopeless.

I hope you heal and get through this. You are not alone in this situation nor do you deserve to be in it. Depression is not a reflection of who you are, or have the potential to be as a person. Sending you so much love <33

[oysters-aint-for-me]

just stupid venting about mental illness etc.

ugh i don’t feel great and i thought it was allergies because i woke up with a bloody nose and a really itchy face and i’ve had a tickle in my throat but i told my dad about it and he was like “oh you’re probably getting what i had” which was some sort of bad cold/flu-like thing (not The flu but similar symptoms) and of course he says it all offhand because he’s not mentally ill and being sick isn’t a big deal to him. but now i’m really upset because the last two times i’ve been sick i have had the WORST sore throat, like, i was in tears, and i don’t want to go through that again, and now i’m dreading when it’ll hit hard, like watching a truck headed my way but i can’t move. AND this weekend is my birthday and it is the first time i’ve been like sort of okay with my birthday in several years. so of COURSE i would be sick this year meaning i won’t do anything for my birthday which ironically is all i have wanted for my birthday for the past 6 years EXCEPT THIS YEAR! but you know what, it doesn’t mean even matter, because everyone else already made plans to do other shit on my birthday so it already felt like people were trying to squeeze it into their busy normal healthy lives until i just gave up and decided what i was going to be doing by myself (LOTR marathon) and if other people want to show up they can. so yeah, that means it’ll just be me and my mom and my dad because no one else can fit me in. idk it’s like. the past several birthdays i have been forced to celebrate them even though i EXTREMELY didn’t want to, like, at all, i have been so profoundly uncomfortable every year, but i made myself go through with it with a smile because people want to be nice to you on your birthday and they get weird if you’re weird about it because then it’s like “uh oh now we have to comfort the mentally ill birthday person awkwaaard” and anyway i already didn’t care and so i just let them do whatever they wanted because at least it made them happy, you know? liek whatever, just go limp and go along with it. but this year i felt like i could actually try a little, and so i tried. and it didn’t even make a fucking difference. now, i know that getting sick right before my birthday isn’t like, some sort of narrative metaphor about how i’m doomed to unhappiness or part of some scheme where the universe is conspiring against me specifically. i know that. i know germs are random and that people are busy and that no one probably really paid enough attention (and i can’t fault them for that, it’s not like i made it easy) to realize how uninvolved and unhappy i have been in my past several birthdays so why would they think this one is particularly special. people don’t know what they don’t know and i can’t expect them to read my mind. i know that. but i wish i didn’t. i wish could give myself permission to feel irrationally angry or to blame something or someone else other than myself. i wish i could cite this information and then go wide with it and conclude that this is yet more evidence that i shouldn’t try to “get better.” but i know all of that is illogical and i know that other people would use cognitive behavioral logic against it if i told them and i know that they would be RIGHT. and i also know that none of that would change how i feel. and no, i don’t know 100% for sure that it wouldn’t help, that’s not logical either, but i do have a lifetime of experience so i can make a p good guess. but whatever, anyway i’m gonna be sick on my birthday anyway and i’ll be miserable just like i have been the last 6 years. so fuck me, i guess! ugh sorry anyway if you read this far thank you for “listening” 💜 i don’t feel better but it did make some time go by so eh you win some you lose some

[tkeyahwrotethis]

I remember, I remember when I lost my mind. There was something so pleasant about that place.

I met someone new in group today.

I feel so boring compared to these other ladies... lol which is kind of a relief.

The lady I matched up with today was... married. With actually a really nice ring. I'm super curious to know like why... is a married woman in a counseling group for single mothers?

She explained to me that she and her husband had known each other since they were teenagers. He was her first love and once they were in college they started struggling with substance abuse. She got help for her issues but his mental health got really bad, worse than hers, even though they both suffer from mental illness. He started becoming emotionally and physically abusive towards her and then she got pregnant and it somehow got even worse. Their child is 3 now. She realized he was never going to change because she tried to get him therapy and on medication to help him and he never wanted the help. He started being resentful of her and blaming her for things that could in no way be her fault if she tried but he needed a scapegoat.

"I sat him down as my best friend, someone I known for half my life and told him I needed a divorce because he's hurting our family. we both cried about it but he understood and told me he'd give me what I wanted. Why did this nigga start acting SUPER CRAZY. He started doing things that made the cops have to pick him up and admit him into mental health facilities for months at a time so he wouldn't have to legally sign the divorce papers"

(I chucked because that's literally so hilarious)

"She's like that's where we're at right now. I beg him and plead to him to sign the papers, we cry, and he agrees and says he will do whatever I want him to do, he wants me to move on and be happy then he goes and does some crazy shit that he goes away and never signs the fucking divorce papers. I feel like he's making me crazy again because why won't he just sign the papers?

Fast forward to today, I've moved out and I consider us separated even though he won't legally divorce me. I'm truly hurt by everything he's put me through but I decided to start dating. I connected with this guy he just got out of a toxic relationship with his bm, and they have 2 kids together. I have real feelings for this new guy but there's some red flags. He constantly compares me to his babymother when it comes to how I choose to raise my daughter and run my house but in the same breath will say he wishes he met me before he met her. It gets annoying. Then whenever my bd is home I try to get him help, I try to get him to sign the papers, and I'm still wearing the ring. So I'm not perfect either because I know that annoys my boyfriend. Like I always have one foot out the door in my old life."

She started looking to me asking for advice.

I basically told her that the easy answer is she needs to leave her bd alone. you cannot reason with crazy people. they will never feel like they're in the wrong. he's blaming you for shit that could never be your fault... but she kept making excuses for her bd so I feel like she's not closing the door on him right now.

I told her I don't really know my bd that well, random tinder hookup. He doesn't want to be a father so I'm doing it alone. I showed her pictures of my baby. She was like wow she's so beautiful she looks like a white version of you !! that made me giggle.

I kept thinking to myself .... what kinda sex mentally ill people be having lol

[zacrete]

Everyone loves to tell others how important it is to seek help, reach out, get a therapist, get a psychiatrist, get medicated. That their mental health health is their own responsibility. And to some degree, that’s right.

But nobody likes to hear that it doesn’t just go one way, that you need care too, even if you’re not hurting in the same way that they are. Healing is fucking difficult. Finding the right medication is painful. Altering your brain chemistry is intense. Digging through past trauma is traumatizing. Witnessing that, especially when it’s happening to someone you love, is not easy.

A large part of what makes it so painful for neurodivergent people to seek treatment is that we understand how difficult this process is. How much pain we’re going to go through. How much suffering we will have to endure in the process of healing. Many of us have been through this process before, attempted to heal, sought help, tried medications. Sometimes that process is interrupted, delayed, unsuccessful.

And for some, one of the most painful things about that is being hyper aware of how difficult it is for others to see us like this. People we love, people who love us. It’s hard to see us crying and staring blankly into space for days on end while we’re trying new medications, experiencing one that doesn’t work, coming off of something that wasn’t for us. We don’t want others to suffer as a result of our attempts to improve ourselves.

Sometimes that love can make it so difficult to go through the process that it deters us from trying. We remain in pain and stasis for years, decades, knowing that our friends and family won’t be able to fully understand what we’re going through, what we’re feeling, what we’re thinking, especially when we’re trying to figure that out for ourselves.

When someone you love is doing their best to make it through a difficult period, when they’re going through the painful process of treatment, do not assume that any expression of pain is a bad thing. We must remain safe, we must remain aware, and caring about our well being is a good thing, but sometimes helping someone heal means learning how to change your own behavior as well.

There is no magic button for this. Inpatient facilities have their function, but you cannot push someone through the door and expect them to walk out a few days later as right as rain. Care for your loved ones, be concerned for them, make sure they’re safe, but before you suggest that someone in the middle of a difficult period check themselves into a facility, stop and consider.

Do you want them to do this because they’re experiencing more pain than they can handle? Or are you suggesting it because you’re experiencing pain from seeing them suffer?

It may feel like defensive reversal or blame shifting, but it is very, very common to confuse someone else’s pain with your own. Many of us feel broken, self-conscious, selfish, incapable of expressing our emotions because of stigma, judgement, assumption, and misunderstanding. This can just as easily come from a place of love and fear as prejudice and malice. And it can hurt just as much.

Living with mental illness is painful. Living with someone who is living with mental illness can be just as painful. Both sides of that require work, learning, patience, and acceptance of the fact that sometimes we are not going to be okay. Sometimes this can last for days, weeks, months. It’s hard to witness. It’s hard to be around. But sometimes the thing we need most of all is time and space to not be okay, especially when we’re experiencing drastic changes and difficult circumstances.

Sometimes it’s appropriate to be concerned about how we feel. And sometimes we just need to be left the hell alone so we can cry for a few days without worrying that we’re ruining others’ lives because we’re in pain. This takes time. Neurodivergence does not imply a lack of self awareness. Concern is appreciated, but trust is just as important. We cannot heal if we’re being hovered over and constantly pressured to feel better for somebody else’s comfort. It makes us withdraw, isolate, hide.

While we’re working and learning to live with our conditions, we need those around us to learn to live with them too. We don’t always need you to give us concerned looks and pats on the back and say “it’s okay, there, there.” Sometimes we need to be allowed to sit on the couch with a movie on and weep openly in the presence of our loved ones and not have it be treated like a fucking crisis. We need to be allowed to exist in our homes without forcing smiles and hiding our emotions to make others comfortable, because that becomes harder and harder to maintain as time goes on. If we feel like we’re hurting you by simply existing every time we’re in a bad place, we’re going to hide to try to spare you that pain, and everyone is going to end up hurting more.

[lutawolf]

Hi Luta,

It's me the anon who asked you that ask.

First of all, thank you for answering my ask. Thank you very much. Since I am anonymous it's actually ok.

Yes, I do follow you heavily and I have read most of the posts on your blog, that's why I decided to ask you. I was nervously waiting for your answer.

My dad is aware of my mother's illness. He and I were the scapegoats. She tried to file a police report against me and my father but it was stopped by my grandparents.

Currently my father is away at work . He can't be contacted very easily. He will come home in another 6 /7 months.

My mother has actually isolated us from almost everyone we know. She has bad blood with everyone she knows.

My little sibling isn't allowed to leave the house unless it's with her. I am allowed to leave because I have a job and university.

She has tried to get violent with me but I'm much stronger than her.

The mental health institutions in our country are terrible.They are mostly used for 'conversion therapy'.

My mother's rages are extremely uncontrollable. My siblings know that there's something wrong with her and are scared of her.

I have informed some of my closest friends about this issue. I will start documenting everything. She has these weird delusions all the time.

1. She hears sounds that we cannot.

2. She sees things which we can't see. (Eg: A person following her)

3. She talks [like whispers] to herself like she's talking to another person.

4. Has insane rages.[tantrums]

5. Takes revenge if she gets angry at us.

6.Makes food that we can't eat or gives us very little food if we do something to set her off . [Indirect starving, Has tried to poison us.]

7. Won't give us medicine if we get sick. Witholds medication if we make her angry so that we will learn through suffering. Confiscates medicine if she sees them.

7. Won't give us money. (Not a problem for me,but an issue for my siblings)

8.She does stuff by herself and accuses me of doing it.(Eg: Closes the door by herself and then comes to me and accuses me of closing the door.) ( It's like she does it unconsciously and then blames others)

9. Interrogates us in everything we do . I have to go through her interrogation everyday before I leave the house.

10. Sabotaged me from doing a job many times before and prevented me from having relationships.

She is an extremely beautiful woman but has a terrible personality. She is smart and charismatic and very good at manipulating people. In the beginning none of the adults believed me and my brother. Throughout my childhood she hid everything she did tome and my siblings. But from recently,she has started behaving the same way towards my father and her own family. She has this magnetic personality where everyone is attracted to her. (I don't understand how she does that. )She waits until you are fully deep in her web to start acting out.

I was so isolated throughout my childhood, my friends weren't allowed to contact me when I went home. I had a strict schedule and if I got low marks I would be punished severely. I understood everything after I entered university and started to do a job.

She specifically hates me because I'm her daughter ( She sees me as her competition, I think) and my dad is a very quiet man so it's easy for her to scold him.

Hey Anon,

Everything you've mentioned is pretty common in an adult that hasn't ever been treated. I wish I knew which country you lived in, so I could help find you resources because hun, you and your siblings need help.

Make sure you and your siblings follow all the advice I gave to treat someone in an episode. Keep as much physical distance as possible. Too many voices, loud noises, and general discord can trigger. This is not you or your sibling's fault. This has to be your mantra for yourself and them. This is your parents' problem, not yours or your siblings.

I know that you are thinking about how your dad needs to make a living for you and your siblings. That someone has to work. But you need to find away to let him know how bad it is. It's his responsibility to care and protect you and your siblings. That is not your job, despite the level of responsibility that you feel.

If she is at the point of extreme paranoia, then her delusions have her thinking other people are conspiring to hurt her. At the best of times, she thinks you are people that she has to protect from the intruders. This usually results in being moved around and being isolated to stay safe. At the worst of times, she doesn't know it's you and thinks you're the enemy.

Document, document, and document. I don't know of a country where it's legal to withhold food from your kids or hit them. Email your grandparents and let them know that it's getting physical. In most countries, there are grandparent rights. If you can't call, then email. Have friends get in touch with family members for you and local resources. Have friends get you food that you can stash for you and your siblings.

Make an escape plan with friends. This is going to be iffy because your mom can be charismatic and have the police thinking you're kidnapping your siblings. That's where documenting is going to be important, but do not let her find it. She is too paranoid. Hide it on the cloud, one drive, drop box, just something you can access from anywhere.

Be safe and if you ever need to talk. I'm here. 💜💜💜

[my-gf-is-kazuichi-soda]

Still in the middle of D3 so no spoilers please!

Edit: I've finished D3, spoilers okay now lol

--

I dont usually make up family headcanons with same-age characters (it leaves myself more room for shipping) but for some reason I came up with three of them here. Okay I just realized the first one theyre not same age but, uh, anyway!

Ryoma is Hiyoko's uncle. I dont have much of an explanation for this. At first I thought it would be a funny idea if Ryoma was Hiyoko's dad but then I realized that Hiyoko's dad goes to all her dance recitals while Ryoma's been in jail for a while, so that makes it kind of impossible. Just a silly idea.

Kazuichi is Kaito's younger cousin (idk what the timeline is for D3 compared to the other games yet, and I know often times this class is headcanoned as younger than the D2 class, but this is all in an au anyway). They're same-voice actor cousins. Kaito gave Kazuichi the idea to build a rocket engine, maybe they watched alien movies together when they were little. Kaito hasn't seen Kazuichi since she was still in her booknerd phase, so Kaito would laugh a lot if you told him that his nervous, fidgety cousin went through a "scary punk phase." Have an idea for a short fanfic where he calls and says he's coming to visit her again and she's mid-transition at this point and unsure about coming out to him - I think he'd be cool with it. He'd possibly confuse trans with drag at first but he would be supportive and say that he's glad to see Kazuichi gain some confidence and self-esteem "even if you're still a bit fidgety" (Kaito that's not from being afraid that's just the adhd). Also Kaito and Zoey get along alright.

Nagito is Kokichi's older brother. (potential ableism trigger warning, also a warning for that sibling dynamic where one kid is neglected for the sick/disabled kid). There's angst potential as well as funny potential. This is more subject to change since there's a lot I still dont know about Kokichi, but from what I can tell he's a manipulative liar always making scenes to get attention and even though some of the fandom says he is "a normal person faking mental illness," I dont buy it. Maybe he's faking something, but he definitely has something too. Not sure if this is a controversial opinion, but I believe that people who fake mental illnesses (to this degree at least) are not neurotypical, it's a cry for help and they do need something, so they shouldn't be brushed off as just "ableist assholes" because there is something going on, though on the flip side it is not the job of other mentally ill people to coddle their feelings when that person is being ableist.

I think Kokichi also went through some trauma, like something happened with his family that made him have to attend court sessions (he said in the first trial that he had to go to trials all the time a long time ago "for his crimes as an Ultimate Supreme Leader" but I think that's Kokichi-talk for "he was a little kid and had to sit in trials for some family drama and the adults constantly blamed him for problems that weren't his fault," which is why he plays up this sort of misbehaving bad kid role). Anyway, my ansty hcs is that Kokichi was neglected because his parents focused on Nagito's illnesses, and that's part of why he acts up to get attention. He has some resentment for that but blames his parents more than Nagito and he and Nagito have the type of sibling relationship where they're sometimes on good terms and sometimes can't stand each other. They've thrown some shade at each other but Kokichi really knows how to piss off Nagito and is not afraid to bring up "hope" to mess with his head (though if anyone else did this they would suffer Kokichi's wrath, as far as he's concerned he's the only one allowed to pick on Nagito). Nagito thinks he goes easy on Kokichi when they fight but he can be petty and sassy back and has a lot of embarrassing dirt on Kokichi. They're the kind of brothers that will pester and argue with each other but they'll bury the dead body for the other no questions asked. And Lord help you if they're in the same courtroom, they could find the dumbest little things to bicker with each other about and filibuster the case, but also Nagito will totally back up Kokichi's lies and vise-versa. Whatever creates bigger hell at the moment for the player. It was a mercy they weren't in the same game.

Anyway, since I haven't finished the game yet there's probably-definitely stuff I dont know about these characters but I got excited to share this with you.

[big-brothers-blog42]

So im going to keep this brief but i kinda want this post to serve as a reminder for myself and a lesson for others who have the same bad habits as me.

I recently realized that i have been practicing deduction at least in some capacity for around 8 years now.

And in that 8 years I

thought about deduction just about every day.

Researched countless areas that would be helpful with improving deduction.

Came up with countless ideas for potential study's that i could do.

Hell most of my interests either is the result or stems from deduction.

HOWEVER even with all that said i quite frankly suck at deduction. Im terrible at observing people or situations, Im awful at profiling people, Im terrible with simple logic and reasoning and frankly i have no one but myself to blame.

I thought about it for awhile and realized about 3 main reasons why.

1. I have a habit of putting things off and assuming ill learn or do something in the future when im better prepared, have better resources, in a better position to learn, and so on.

2. I get overly interested in new things and rather than focusing on the basics like i know i should ill jump to a new topic and repeat the same awful process. So eventually i have a bunch of random trivia or partially useful information but since i lack a deep understanding of the subjects to actually make it useful or applicable to deduction.

3. Im just not a very consistent person.

So one way to rectify my mistake is to start completely from scratch and do things slowly and methodically this time around. Which i mean i knew i probably should have done years ago.

I knew for about 4 years now that i should start over but for whatever irrational reason i thought "i would get behind in my Deduction progress" or " having a routine would only slow me down and be boring".

Which even at the time i knew was irrational and i would come to regret not starting over. Which i indeed have.

So while i plan on what series of things i should focus on and learn i plan on going over any and all deduction related content that i can and adding it to my mental web of knowledge (Which is a legitimate note taking method and knowledge storing method that i have been VERY much looking forward to showing people how it works. I dont mean to make outrageous claims but i really do think that it could very well rival the memory Palace in terms of usefulness. Not necessarily to replace but to enhance it.)

So just in case I didn't make it clear in my post here are some take aways that i want people (Especially newbies) to know

1. Its easy to give yourself the illusion of progress. especially when you mindlessly consume information without a solid end goal or a way to quantify and track your progress.

2. There's no harm in going back to basics. But it's going to bite you in the ass later on if you don't have a solid foundation

3. Plan how your going to achieve or learn something rather than passively waiting until a ideal moment. Which in my experience never comes.

[myceli-yum]

'Bleeding' - a poem about toxic friendship

I normally preform this as slam poetry, I've never shared it in written form before. Let me know how I did!

No hate on the subject of this poem, he's not a bad person, our mental illnesses just severely clashed.

tw:graphic imagery, blood (all metaphorical)

When you show your cards in a game of poker

It's called bleeding

My insides exposed to your eye hidden from mine by

sunglasses

Silver aviators

cause that's how poker works

I didn't know how this worked at first

I laid my cards flat on the table 

Placed my heart face up

cause

i wasn't worried about paper cuts

cause

i thought we were a team

You got to see how my heart beats

I let my cards bleed

because

I didn't know i was playing

I wasn't keeping score because

i didn't know it was a game

Blame me when you lose

Shame me for making it easy to cheat

I bleed

I'm naive

I like to trust

Place trauma on the table face up

I like to show my cards

cause

what if somebody knows what they mean more than me

and

what if i see something that they're missing

and

what if we can help each other out

What if neither of us has to end up

destitute 

You told me you had nothing left to give

But i never said you owed me

I try and hold my cards close to my heart cause

last time I shared my hand you gave me so many paper cuts it

stopped

beating

I never thought you could throw cards like that

I never thought my own could be so sharp like that

I never thought you'd use my insecurities to cut me like that

Sometimes I'm scared everyone's secretly like that

That there really is debt in friendship

That I really should've been keeping track of my chips and loving

really is about bluffing

and loving's about learning to pretend you don't love someone

learning to play the game

Learning to place your bets 

learning to lose investments

Learning not to bleed at the table

If i was able to hold my hand in my mouth i would

I would swallow my cards to keep them safe in my stomach if i could 

but i bleed

I'm naive

I try not to trust

as much as i do but

in my defense it was hard not to trust you

And your heart

hidden behind a blue plaid button up but

i could hear its sturdy beating

Not bleeding

deflated detached defeated placed

face up on the table like mine

But stable like the way you stand

Safe

like when I'd place my forehead to your chest formed

a wall of aces

and kings to protect us

I played my cards face up cause 

I wasn't worried about paper cuts cause 

I thought your cards were blunt cause

you told me we were family

And that was the meanest thing you could've said to me

Honesty that cuts is better than lies that sneak inside like a virus

We are family

Meaner than texts that read

Every fear I've ever had was true

I let myself bleed to make room for you

Placed an eight of clubs behind my sternum

Tied my arteries to your aviators so i wouldn't lose you

I don't blame you for playing

I just didn't know it was a game 

I'm someone who keeps insides outside like spare dice cause

what if someone forgot theirs? 

I hold my heart close to my chest but my ribs

like a Kevlar vest won't

let it back in

Skin

has learned the ways of the game

Skin

has learned paper cuts can get infected

Skin has learned not to let you in

but it's tricky to tell your sharp apart

from their blunt cards cause

skin doesn't have eyes

and yours were always hidden from mine by sunglasses

Silver aviators

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

I had my older sister say the *exact* same thing to me too, and she’s 2 years older then me too. Didn’t hint at it. Just said it explicitly and nastily to me when we were lightly arguing once. Never apologized for it. When I look back at our relationship, she was always trying to get me in trouble, never stood up for me, played her bff against me, never treated me like an equal, always made fun of me in a intimate way and in front of people, even in front of her bfs, tried to ruin my name in the family to make her herself look better. Whenever I had something going for me, she dragged it down.

She sounds like your sister. Selfcentered, blames you for her problems, never treats you of equal worth, really insecure, has codependent relations with shitty men, hardly ever gives the impression that she really cares about you unless she needs something from you, wants you to always be at least one rung below her in everything so that you never get potential attention.

I’m not saying she doesn’t love me, and that I don’t love her., deep down. Just that I don’t deserve to be treated this way, never have been. But when you grow up with a sister like this, it has always been a constant in your life, that by the time you realize it as an adult, the greater part of the damage has been done. She’ll never change. This is part of her personality, so its rooted. You got to do what you got to do.

I had to make a horrible decision once to not take her into my home. But I weighed it long and hard, and looking back on all of the abuse she has thrown my way so easily and carelessly, as if I had no feelings at all but was just her emotional punching bag, I had to tell her, No. And tell her why. ‘Because you are abusive to me, and I know you will slip into it again with me if we are living together, like always, and I can’t have it, anymore.’ It honestly was a matter of survival to me. I didn’t leave her in bad condition, she could have asked my other older sister to help her (and did, after). My other sister is as selfabsorbed and thinks I exist to handle everyones problems in the family, and so got mad at me when I didn’t do as they wanted. So they had hate sessions about me , and now I’m the bona fide villain of the family.

I’m not gonna lie and say it was easy for me to stand up for myself because guilt really ate away at me. But living with her would have decimated me internally,psychologically , I know it. Not everyone is so strong that they can rise above the abuse in their past. Most of us just try to manage it and little by little get to a better place inside ourselves.

Good luck to you, you seem to be dealing with it well.

I'm sorry to hear all that. I believe you made the best decision you could and hope you are doing well 💜

To be honest, my sister was never very nice as children. When I was extremely sick at 13 and 14 (I ended up having surgery and very nearly died), she told everyone I was faking up until she saw me after on a million ivs and hopped up on morphine and agony. It was awful, I was suffering physically, my dad didn't care, and my sister thought I was attention seeking.

It wasn't until a few years later where she apologised and genuinely acknowledged what she did. We have a better relationship sonce but she still has bouts of bitternes bc she has untreated trauma, mentall illness, and addiction issues. This doesn't excuse her behaviour but it is a factor in it.

And I know for a fact I can't live with her again. Whenever we were together she was absolutely cruel. She is not the type to share a space with. She is still very immature and I think she resents that I have typically been able to handle things more maturely than she has. Im not perfect but she acts on emotion first.

Anyhow I've been working on saying no to her. It's tough bc I dont have much relationship with any other family.

[smiles-advice]

Hi so I'm just looking for some advice cause I've gotten myself into a bit of an awkward situation because of how I badly handled a different one?

So I blocked my ex a while back without actually telling him or warning. We'd fallen out of contact for a few months and I had been hoping it would stay that way so that I wouldn't have to actually do anything. But he started messaging me again out of the blue (I think to pad out asking for my help with something? but I'm not too sure). I did talk to him again for a bit but blocked him pretty quick.

For reference the reason is that he makes me really uncomfortable? I feel like he only talks to me when he wants something from me and when it's not for that reason he can be just really mean. Like just outright insulting me to my face as if it's a normal thing to do? Also he used to constantly break into my place with no warning which was just god awful but I couldn't say anything because like... If you upset someone who can break into your place mmm possibly bad consequences???? And it led me to be really anxious all the time and I ended up spiraling into the worst place mentally I've ever been?

I haven't talked to him about any of this because it quite frankly didn't seem like a good option. The one time I did tell him that he'd upset me he immediately started saying about how he was feeling suicidal which is just manipulation 101 and I know I'm a very easy person to manipulate so it's better to not put myself at risk of that.

Like I literally didn't even mention it when we split I just blamed it on my mental health and left it at that.

The problem now is that I'm trying to make new friends at uni and join new societies and I feel like every one I've joined he's also joined. (We have a lot in common so it's not surprising really) But I'm nervous now that there's going to be some sort of confrontation which I don't know if I'll be able to handle? Or I'm worried he'll talk shit about me to everyone and I won't manage to make any friends. I don't think he would actually do that because I don't think he's a bad person- I'm just pretty anxious about it all right now. I'm hoping it'll be a non-issue but ???????? I'm just not sure atp???

I know this is 100% on me for not communicating with him so I shouldn't really complain- but in my defence he does kinda scare me a little

Hiya!

First of all, apologies for the late reply. Got some bad news then fell ill, so I'm just a useless mess as always.

I don't think this is on you at all! I think this guy is displaying really scary behaviours and you're not at fault for trying to avoid a confrontation. If he scares you, he scares you, and that's not your fault.

I'd seriously recommend logging this with the authorities if you feel comfortable, especially the part where he's broken into your place on multiple occasions. and definitely talk to the university (I can't for the life of me think about what the head is called other than principal but that sounds too high school). But it needs to be on record somewhere, and maybe your uni can help separate you in some way.

also tell your friends and family! People you trust! don't be afraid in silence.

Best of luck, all my love your way, stay safe!

[anonymousisnotavailable]

I have realized just how bad, I am at being on my own. Not at being single but physically alone. I used to enjoy spending time alone, but now it feels uncomfortable. To be fair I have felt this way in a while, but it is a lot easier to ignore when dating. Specially since my closest friends and I live far from each other, and we get to see each other a couple of times a year. R lives the closest to me, so we see each other fairly often. The problem with spending time alone is, that you are left alone with your thoughts. If there is one thing, I excell in, it is spiralling. I keep telling myself, that my thoughts are just thoughts. Thoughts and reality are two different things. The worst part is, that some of my thoughts are rooted in fear of, what others might be thinking about me. I often worry about my social life. A while back I worried a lot about making new friends. So much that I joined this Facebook group originally created by a popular blogger. It is exclusively for women, and I appreciate that. I met up with a couple of girls from there, and while they were nice enough, we just didn't click. Which for some time had me thinking, that maybe there was something wrong with me in particular. I know that is not the case, but it's so easy to blame yourself. Now I think my problem isn't necessarily, that I lack friends. Don't get me wrong, I would love to make new ones. But I think it is more about me missing the friends, I do have immensely. Another thing is that after getting better, I realized that I am a lot more sociable, than I thought. This is typically where I start to seriously spiral. Because the next thing to pop into my head is usually the question of my ability to find a partner. I have not had a boyfriend since, I was a teen. I feel embarrassed admitting this; it does not matter that it is in writing, and no one on here will see or care much about it. But it usually comes up on dates, and I feel uncomfortable telling a guy, I barely know. I fear that if things go well, they might feel some kind of responsibility. Like they have to teach me how to be in a relationship. Which would in turn make me feel like a child. But it is not exactly like, it is something I have had to worry about with the guys, I have dated. With J I felt kind of blindsided, because while I thought, we were getting serious, that was definitely not his impression. There were signs, that I overlooked. We should have had a talk early on. Instead it ended up going on for six months. I think, I would have handled it a lot different today. He was looking for some kind of manic pixie dream girl, and what he got was a mentally ill woman. I joke about this a lot, but I honestly believe that my state of mind played a big role. I mean in the sense, that not only was my selfworth non-existent, but I was ill enough that not being treated properly was easier to deal with than my symptoms. When you kind of want to die, a guy being an ass isn't exactly a big deal. With L things were different, because I have grown so much since J. It is not, that I was not insecure at any point. I liked him enough for a while, that I worried about anything he said or did. But when that died down, and I realized, that whatever his thoughts might be, I did not want a relationship. It just made it a whole lot easier, that we agreed. So what is it, that I worry so much about it. Well, it is pretty simple. I have not had much luck in love, that did not matter. I does now though. I sometimes catch myself thinking, that maybe I am unlovable. That there is something inheretably wrong with me. It may not be true, sometimes I feel like it might as well be. There is an element of imposter syndrom too. When they start telling me, that I am pretty or funny or intelligent, all I can think is, that at some point they will realize, that I am not any of those things. Maybe I just like to punish myself. If I assume from the start, that things won't work out, I can avoid being hurt. How to end up hurt anyway for dummies. I deserve good things. I really do.

[thesalvationofdoriangray]

Looking back in life, I realized that it has never been easy. It seems that everything has been challenging since the day I was born. From my mother not taking care of me until I was 3, her psychosis from mental illness, my father's emotional rage and absence to being shamed from church, failed romances, and suffering from drug addiction and bondage. Everyone has a story of shame. It was always hard to get past mine. I'm still learning

I think this epiphany dawned on me today as I was thinking about two things.

1. I work at the ROL food bank and I had a relapse on alcohol and Xanax. I was honest to my boss and mustered up the courage to go back to work. I was thankful to him for giving me another chance. I noticed some people treat me different. I use to have great conversations with some of the aunties. We use to say hi. I noticed when I say hi to some of them now, they're expressionless. That's when I realized they stopped greeting me and often ignore me. I always idealize that people at church would treat me the way that Jesus does. With grace, acceptance, and forgiveness but that's just not how humans are. They are judgmental. I guess I can't blame them. I have to pay for the consequences of my sin. I guess I lost credibility with them. One auntie even warned my gf to stay away from me. She happens to be a pastor and my boss. I guess she's just trying to protect my gf like a daughter. One time I was talking to this girl about her ministry. I wanted to help out. I got her number. Then I saw one of the higher ups pull her aside and say something in her ear When I asked her about her ministry, she never responded back to my text. I never hurt anyone else, only myself. This is a lesson about accepting myself and putting my faith in God rather than people. If I don't do so I won't be able to experience God's forgiveness and everyone's opinion of me will become my idol. What they think is their problem and ultimately does not matter. I know Jesus loves me and understands my heart. This job is just a stepping stone for something greater. Lord, please give me the strength to persevere and build character. Walk me through this father.

2. I'm taking Microbiology. I checked the reviews of each professor and went with the easier one or so I thought. From COVID came the inception of hybrid classes. Half online, half in person. These lectures are 1 to 2 hrs long and are jam-packed with tons of info. It takes me around 4 hours or more to finish my notes. There are literally exams, quizzes, practicals and exams every other week to every week. Last exam I studied my ass off. I tried to remember everything and couldn't. When I took the exam which is 55 questions, 5 being bonus, I finished in 25 min when we had an hour. When I got my grade, I was shocked to see I got 102/100. A++! When I was child, I was asking for help from my father in math. All he did was berate me. My mother being unstable and stressed from work came into the room and open hand slapped my face and head until I was dizzy and curled into a ball. I think from there even though I didn't know it, I internalized that I was bad at school. I always cheated, never did HW, skipped classes, and never studied. I went back to school when I was 32. Throughout this time I realized that I have great potential but I have to work hard. I exceeded my expectations on this last exam. May the Lord remind me that I can do it if I give it my all. Be with me father and help me persevere until the end.

Heavenly Father,

I realized that most things in my life have been difficult but God puts me in these situations for me to grow. He has great plans for me. When I trust in God, I experience peace. I don't want to worry too much about my mistakes. So as long as I have faith in God, I will go to where I belong and become whom God destined me to be.

There has never been a time where you didn't love me. Your love is perfect. You always wait patiently for me to come back to you. The heaven rejoices when the long lost prodigal son returns home. When you see me, you smile.

Lord God, I praise your holy and infinite name. You are the mightiest of mighty but yet the gentlest of gentle. You always have faith in me. So many challenges in life. All yet to mold me and help me grow. All to draw me closer to you and become who I am destined to be. You refine me in the fires of my tribulations to make my heart pure gold. You allow this pressure to turn my faith into a diamond and shine bright for this world to see. If the world is my oyster, then you are my iridescent pearl which I treasure so dearly.

Please be with me through this journey called life my dear beloved savior. Place your divine hand on my broken heart and piece it back together with your love.

In the precious name of Christ, Amen.

[tavarillasgalen]

when so much of your life has been consumed by mental illness, it’s easy to beat yourself up for not being where other people your age are or for the fact that people younger than you have experienced more life and accomplished far more than you. 

framing mental illness as, well, an illness helps with that. whenever i get down on myself, i’m like, would i be upset with myself if the reason why i’m not where i want to be is because of a physical illness? no. i wouldn’t. 

but because mental illness is so stigmatized and so many people take the “just go outside and eat healthy, no need for meds or therapy or anything!” approach that invalidates the severity of it, it’s so easy to forget. if it were something i could control, i wouldn’t have it.

so framing mental illness like physical illness helps so much. it is not a lie to tell people you have had serious health issues, because health is literally in mental health. to just say health issues gets so much more understanding and encouragement. to say depression or anxiety gets weird looks, condescending, and being treated like you’re lazy. 

it gets internalized and you start blaming yourself, when... whether or not you get treatment for your mental illness is somewhat in your control, depending on your insurance and finances. if you are able to get treatment, you should, but also, not everyone can afford it or access it. but whether or not you actually have mental health issues? it’s not a choice. that’s not something you can control. you are not lazy for struggling with your mental health.

i just, i get so in my head about all the years i’ve lost to mental illness. i felt like i was stupid and lazy and was just so frustrated with myself, because i wanted to do all these things, but then, well... my brain is not kind to me. and then people judge you and it makes it even worse. but just making that little switch, to reminding yourself, to telling others, that you have health issues, and not needing to specify what they are, makes such a difference, in how you are treated and in how you treat yourself.

because really - wanting to die? that’s an incredibly serious health issue. anxiety so bad you literally start hyperventilating around other people? that’s a very serious health issue. those are the most serious examples, but you know. 

and then just, that framing, it makes me feel so much better. my birthday is in a few months, and that always sends me spiraling. especially because i’m 26, i’m going to be 27. i feel so very behind everyone else, and i get angry, sometimes, at the years mental illness stole from me. 

but i was ill. very, very, very ill. i still am, but i’m getting better. i’m doing so much better this year than i have in a while. and also, i spent too many years in a relationship waiting for the other person and just supporting them while they wouldn’t tell me about things that very much impacted both of our lives. all those years waiting played a role too. that is something that i have to remind myself of too. this is not wholly on me and my health, but also on the fact that i let myself be trapped in a relationship that held me back for years on end.

but now i know better, to not let myself be held back by someone else, especially not when it’s for years at a time. to not let myself lose myself in supporting others. to ask for help when needed. to seek treatment when i can. 

no, i’m not where i want to be. but 26 is so young, still. when i turn 27, i will still be so young, still. hell, you are considered young until 40, then you’re middle-aged. i will be young for a long time yet. and when i’m not, when i am old, when i am middle-aged, i will still have the world ahead of me. your worth does not decrease with age. no matter how old you are, you can still change your life.

i just need to remind myself that i can be where i want to be, in time. i’m recovering from serious health issues and regaining my sense of self after losing it in a relationship. i cannot be angry with my past self, because she was just doing her best. she was trying so, so hard. and many, many of those days, just simply living to the next day was the most difficult thing in the world. 

no, i’m not where i want to be or where i dreamed/dream to be. but i think if past me could see me now, with a full-time job doing what i love in an exceptional workplace, with an improving relationship with her family, with mental stability, with a sense of safety, with the courage to stand up for myself and make hard calls, with the accomplishments i have done, sure, she’d be disappointed that we aren’t where we thought we’d be. but i imagine she would also be so relieved that there would come a time where she wouldn’t want to die 24/7. where she could go outside her room without breaking down and having a panic attack. where she would be respected and valued at her work and enjoy the work she does instead of being treated like a machine. where she has a sense of safety, security, and the freedom to go after what she wants. 

i’m not where other people my age or younger are. but i’m doing so, so, SOOOO much better than i was before. and that’s all that really matters - your personal journey. to compare is to lose the nuances of the situation. 

[adhbabey]

Psychopathy is a thing tho. It is separate from ASPD and psychosis. It is not technically a diagnosis, it is currently considered a "personality construct". Sociopath is less an official term these days than psychopath, which is whatever but while there is significant overlap between ASPD and psychopathy, they are not necessarily the same thing. Someone could have one or both but they have different criteria. And psychosis is another thing entirely. There are also two types of psychopathy, factor 1 and factor 2. Factor 2 tends to line up more with ASPD or what some would call a sociopath. There's also a thing called pseudopsychopathy, typically associated with damage to the ventromedial prefrontal cortex.

I agree that it is problematic that police procedurals/true crime shows and movies heavily associate psychopathy and personality disorders with violent crime. However, criminal offenders, violent or otherwise, often do have (usually undiagnosed and untreated) mental disorders or are neurodivergent.

People try so hard to separate personality disorders and psychotic disorders from violence and crime that they forget that criminals are still people with their own psychopathology that may or may not impact their criminal behavior. There is no single thing that determines someones choices, but it is disingenuous to say that someone's psychopathology has no effect at all.

One thing, psychosis is not a disorder, it's a symptom of many disorders. Psychosis is when you experience delusions and hallucinations, similar to a hypnotic trance, and is often caused by triggers, such as unreality. "Psychotic" people refer to those with psychosis.

Psychopathy, however, is not in the DSM, and is not a thing, just something we made up to assign to people who are "evil". Here is a good article on it. It's not real in the case that it's a "mental disorder". Sure, it exists as something in criminal psychology, but it's not an actual thing that actually applies to anyone, just something we apply to people that we deem as bad.

People with ASPD are those who have no affective empathy, they cannot experience other people's emotions as their own, and can struggle to understand their own emotions as a part of that. There are many people who are compassionate and kind, with little to no affective empathy, that shouldn't make them villains. As well as, people who mirror others is a common human experience, even with animals, that's normal and not weird. People with ASPD need your support and kindness, trying to convince me of the goodness of criminal psychology doesn't help victims. My blog is here to support all disabled and neurodivergent and mentally ill people, those with ASPD are a part of that. They're not scary at all.

I need you to understand this is not about me discounting the work that doctors do, but the way in which this information is used. This is only used to further demonize those with mental illnesses and disorders, I hope you understand. Think about stuff like profiling or body analysis, or how mental institutions once held both criminals and those who were mentally ill. This information doesn't exist in a vacuum, it's always meant to hurt someone else.

I think that these traits and symptoms associated with criminals is a bad thing. It's like the prison industrial complex, something used to put marginalized people in prison, so they can't fight back. It's not just people of color, it's all marginalized people, disabled people are one of them. Disabled people already barely have any autonomy, so any disabled people that are deemed as dangerous are locked up, what do you think about that? It's real, these things happen all the time.

Do you know like, other disorders that are associated with "damage to the prefrontal cortex", ADHD. I don't think like,, there's much to say on the research of "psychopaths" when it's not even in the manual of mental disorders, and it's often associated with an actual disorder and a symptom of several disorders. But that one disorder isn't even the same, it's deemed as a different thing all together. I honestly think a lot of this is bullshit, and only further causes harm to those of us who are disabled.

Do you even know that most people with personality disorders cannot seek treatment because it's so demonized? That they get turned away or have their disabilities erased, because there is so much shame and hatred surrounding these disorders. Did you even know that some people have medication forced on them because they have a "dangerous" mental illness? I'm not surprised if you haven't. I'm not surprised with the amount of ableism in this world. People with stigmatized disorders are the victims, not neurotypical abled people.

I won't change your mind, clearly. But I want more people to reconsider the information that they are given to, on a silver platter, by the police. Ask yourself why is that information handed to you, so freely? Why is it so easy to believe? How easy is it to just blame someone for the world's problems, and not on the system that created such horrible things? This is not a mistake, I need you to understand that much.