#llex.exe

[ningensorrow]

Chuuya, hat and black coat, but with a simple gray shirt instead of his usual vest, is crouching in the alley of a closing shop, surrounded by three stray kittens.

That soft hearted chibi, he thinks, and it comes out sweetened with more nostalgia than he'd like.

Even in his own mind, where he should have full control, he can't escape the grip of his old partner. 

He can't run away.

Chuuya is inevitable.

The black cat curls its tail around Chuuya's leg, and he lets out a small laugh, one Dazai doesn't hear but has still memorized, a rumble in his chest that he has never deleted. Chuuya pats the kitten on its head, and it follows his hand.

What a needy little thing.

When Chuuya tilts his chin to turn towards the other cats, the hair catches the last rays of the dying sun, slipping behind the horizon, but still hanging on Chuuya some more, as if light itself finds it hard to leave him.

That's right.

After all, Dazai muses, black holes are known to swallow light as well.

little excerpt from my soukoku fic i will eventually finish writing.

[ningensorrow]

chuuya and kenji being besties and chuuya taking it on himself to treat to lunch or dinner the kid whenever he can after he hears that kenji's ability relies on him not eating.

kunikida is out of his mind worried that a mafia executive is hanging out with young, innocent kenji, ranpo always yells after them to bring them back some sweets and dazai teases chuuya restlessly, because "I didn't think that beside being a dog, you were also a mother hen, chibi~".

chuuya wonders if it's morally ambiguous for him to hang out with the enemy, and then he decides that fuck it, he is allowed to be morally ambiguous, he is part of the port mafia, for fuck's sake.

kenji is just happy that he gets this cool man to dote on him and he resolves to ask his family next time he visits if he can bring his mother's home-made blueberry jam and her special spiced wine back with him, to gift it to his newfound friend as a thank you.

[ningensorrow]

sometimes I think, the only person dazai trusts is chuuya, and i cry

[ningensorrow]

After Dazai blows up Chuuya’s car, he walks away without looking behind. He slips into the dark, his feet quick and silent through the dirty alleys, barely touching the ground.

The blood under his bandages matching with the dried one on his clothes, staining his black vest. He doesn’t mind it; he is going to burn those clothes as soon as he reaches somewhere safe – safer, because there is no safety anywhere, there has never been.

It’s so much easier to say this, to say that there is only danger creeping at every corner, waiting to jump on him, choke him with its claws and shadows. It’s easier to say, there has never been, than to say, I felt safe with someone who is dead, than to say, I just walked away from the only other person I could sleep with both my eyes closed. It’s much easier to negate everything that has been, except for death.

He too can’t escape from that.

- burning bridges; i’m sorry for the blood i left behind. 

[ningensorrow]

someone good at art/animation should animate/draw soukoku and odasaku from my oda is alive au living on the road and on the run with buzzcut season by lorde

[ningensorrow]

i guess i am doing this?

hello, i am alex and this is my bungou stray dogs side blog.

you can call me alex, lex, sol or however you want to!

i am 21yo and i am an occasional writer.

feel free to hit me up and be friends <3

my main blog is @onceandfuturewarlqck, while my personal/art/archive one is @dragonstrings.

you can check here for my ao3 account, and here for my spotify! here there is also my twitter account, where i am usually screaming about my weekly main interests. for my fics/writing masterpost you can check here.

always feel free to request for headcanons, fics, playlists, to ask me to explain my playlists, or to just dm me, even just vent to me in private!