#lmfao okay now I’m no longer sorry

[awrkive]

NEIGHBOR BLUNDER, pt. 1 — JJK

in hindsight, you should have seen it coming. had always known your luck – or lack of it, thereof – and the universe's meticulous plan of your downfall made it easy for you to get tangled up in a series of unfortunate events, which presents itself as the neighbor that lives across from you, jeon jungkook.

PAIRING jungkook x (fem) reader

GENRE r18+ (fluff, angst, (eventual) smut) MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

CHAPTER WORD COUNT 18.2k

CHAPTER WARNINGS/MISC neighbor!jk, bsf!jimin, accountant!oc software engineer!jk, jk and jimin are chaebols lol, minjoon boyfriends <<<<3 mature language, this chapter's pretty tame (for now) but theres a lot of FLIRTING, if u squint this story is a mosaic of every shows i love lmfao, for the apartment complex just imagine the namil villa from the kdrama fight for my way NB!JK VISUALS

NOTES hello im back!!!!! remember the jk in tech xmas fic i told you about last year? this is it except its not a xmas fic anymore lmfao. had an idea to make it a full blown story and im just sooo excited to share it with u guys on this platform!!!!! if ur from wattpad, the chapter system is gonna be a little different here but the content is not <3 anyway let me know what u guys think!

READ ON WATTPAD | AO3

PART ONE | TWO

You never settled your relationship with the summer season. To put it simply, it was a love and hate sort of thing; you liked that it was dry, and the air always felt like it was filtered and healthy even though you were well-aware of the current shit-state of the Earth's ozone layer. There were beams and sunlights and street vendors and people lying on the park's ground. Summer felt nostalgic, like the first time you bought a vinyl in highschool and listened to Fleetwood Mac in secret because your mom was certain they peddled cocaine and all sorts of illegal drugs, and with a highschool friend you no longer talk to, not because of a friendship-breaking betrayal but something more melancholic than that like drifting apart as you got older — the ambience, generally, was what you loved the most about it.

But regardless of those, summer got hot. Sure, you could forgo layers of clothing and it was always nice to lounge about in short bottoms and strapless tops and sandals, but at the end of the day, you needed to set your AC on the lowest temp, and it cranks up your monthly rent a greater percentage which causes a detrimental result to your monthly pay. (And you always had to reapply make-up every now and then whenever you went outside because if not, you'd be a sweating mess.)

In the grand scheme of things, though, there was nothing more than you disliked than Park Jimin, your best friend since college, asking you to be his plus-one on his mom's birthday dinner. For the second time.

“I told you, Jimin, I’m not doing that anymore. Your mom called me fat and recommended a bunch of expensive skin care products to treat one single zit on the side of my forehead the last time you brought me there. I hid that with my bangs and she still saw it, like what the hell? The baked lasagna might have tasted good but I’m not stepping one foot in your house ever again.” You spat out, rolling your eyes at your friend who just dramatically flopped himself on your bed.

“Okay, so I’m really sorry about my mom. She’s a…” He trailed off, looking at you with meaningful eyes that weighed words you knew he couldn't exactly say without feeling bad, and you sighed. Nodded in understanding. Jimin’s face contorted into a cringed expression at that. “... yeah. But! Please. I swear! This is the last time. I just really need you to be there. They’re setting me up with Heesu, okay? You know that snotty nepo baby of the Kang clan who owns Kang Tech?”

“Jimin, you’re a nepo baby.”

He hit you with a pillow. “I am but I can earn a hundred thousand won without my family’s money. They can cut my credit cards and I'll still be thriving.”

You broke the serious demeanor and laughed loudly at his seemingly confident claim.

“I’m sorry but you could not even get a job at a burger joint without some nepotism let alone have a hundred thousand without your dad’s credit cards. Bitch, you’re just lying.”

“Fuck you. I was employee of the week at Seventh Street Burger.” He backfired, referring to that point in time in your sophomore year where you picked up a part time job during the summer at a burger joint and Jimin just decided to come along randomly. He got it because the owner knew of his dad.

“Yeah, because Sowon had a crush on you?” You said, remembering the owner’s daughter, who was also helping out at the store at that time. She was so smitten by Jimin you almost felt bad for her.

“Okay, fair, point taken. No need to be such a bitch about it,” Your best friend said with a dismissive wave of his hand, telling he was over it. You only laughed at that, boisterously, might you add, just to piss him off for no reason. Jimin deadpanned. “But seriously. I think they’re planning to marry me off to Heesu.”

Your face fell out of genuine concern this time.

“Oh my god, really?”

Jimin once again cringed visibly. “Yeah. I mean from a business lense it makes sense. But me marrying at 33? That makes me – like – a child groom.”

“Oh… yeah…” you trailed off, sympathizing with him. Not that you've ever been in the situation where your parents forced you in a sham marriage for their own wealth because there was no wealth to begin with. But you felt bad for Jimin. You always have, when it came to this particular subject.

You knew how it was with rich people, having known Jimin for almost half your life. It was true that arranged marriages were still a thing, and while Jimin seemed that he could pretty much do everything he wanted because of his free-spirited nature, his parents could still most likely make him marry someone he barely knew. Solely for business.

“Ugh.” Jimin groaned. “Should I just come out at the dinner so they can stop linking me to women? I’m gay as fuck, man. My cousin Park Youngdam would have a field day given that homophobic fucktard has been calling me the f word ever since he learned it in seventh grade.”

You shook your head, visibly cringing at his words. You didn't have family yourself. It was your mom who raised you alone for all your life, until she died five years ago. Didn't know any extended family. But frankly, you thought it was better that way than to deal with a complicated family like Jimin's.

“Nah. I mean if you’re ready, well, do it. But like, your parents are…” You two shared a look together again, and Jimin just slapped his palms over his face, indicating his doom. Your face twisted with another shot of deeper sympathy for him.

“This is it for me. They’ll marry me off to Kang Heesu and we’ll fly to the US and live in Massachusetts to fulfill her white picket fence fantasy. I’ll be a miserable husband and she'll be an even more miserable wife because she’ll eventually find out I’m gay. The neighbors will start talking and the white republicans will shun me out of the town church. We’ll have a surrogate baby and—”

“Jimin, what the fuck!” You hit him hard on his arm as you couldn't keep a straight face anymore at his dramatic monologue. “You’re not gonna marry Heesu and you won't live in fuckass Massachusetts and no one’s gonna shun you out of the town church and you won't have a surrogate baby.”

“It’s a possibility.” Jimin shrugged.

“I feel like you're guilt-tripping me into agreeing to be your date again at your mom's birthday dinner and I think that's very evil of you.” You said, squinting your eyes at him.

“Well, duh? But also, I’m really kind of lowkey highkey scared they’ll marry me off to someone now that I’m pushing forty.”

"You're quite literally seven years away from forty." You countered.

He looked at you with an expression of I know right! And he told you so.

"That's what I said to mom and dad, but they're acting like my sperm will freeze next year. God, I can't stand them!" 

Jimin, for all his jokes and unserious and bitchy behavior, was someone extremely important to you. Yeah, sure, he was rich as hell and he annoys you when he says something that reeks of too much nepotism but he was never intentionally snotty, never thinks he was better than everyone else (Jokes about how he thinks he has the fattest and juiciest ass in the world, though), and he wasn't at all like the rich people you've had the misfortune of interacting with at his mom's birthday party last year. He might be a self-proclaimed bitch but if you put him together with those people, he might as well be one of God's disciples.

For all his crass language and rather strong personality, Jimin was a doting friend who was there for you every single time. You could call him up at 3 am and he’d be at your door bringing Chinese take out and two tubs of ice cream, ready to hear you vent about your stupid job or a guy that you fumbled by being weird and off-putting because you didn't know how to handle a relationship. He was the kind of friend who would defend you in front of anyone else but will mercilessly tell you off and list down all points of your stupidity once you were in closed doors. He was the kind of friend that would ask you to be his pretend partner at a birthday dinner party, but he was your best friend ultimately and even if you had a big problem with his family and their extremely traditional (read: toxic) ways, you didn't want him to be pressured into coming out just so he could avoid to be engaged off to another random heiress. Didn't want him to do something he wasn't ready for. Didn't want him hurt or anything of the sort.

The last dinner wasn't even that bad, if you were to be honest. His parents were shitty, yeah sure, and the other guys in there that consisted of politicians and businessmen and people in the showbiz industry were something taken out of the toilet bowl for how stinky their elitist, better-than-you personalities were, but you both just totally forgot all about it by getting wasted at the local bar right after leaving. Not that his mom’s words didn't sting a bit or didn't make you a little conscious, but at the end of the day, you weren't actually dating Jimin so you didn't care what his parents thought of you.

Additionally, you didn't have something planned for the next two weeks when the birthday would be happening. You were supposed to, but that ship has long sailed when you fumbled a date with the guy at the IT department. For the record, you didn't really like him that much and he talked too much about his job and while you didn't mind that, it was getting a little too tiring. If you wanted IT lessons you would’ve majored in it in college. Still, Shin Taemu was handsome. And he wore those rounded glasses. Was tall. Had nice arms. Too bad he wanted to be the next Mark Zuckerberg. Fuck that guy.

“Ugh, I don't know,” you groaned. “It's just so disgusting to be your girlfriend, okay?”

Jimin audibly gasped. “How dare you? A lot would jump on this ass.” He said with incredulity seeping through his voice, pointing to his bum.

You rolled your eyes. “Not me, obviously. Before you take offense—”

“Offense taken.”

“—it’s just that you're like my cousin and when you call me honey I want to crawl out of my own skin.”

Jimin laughed at that while you looked miserable, remembering those moments from last year. Seriously, how could you have fooled anyone in that party that you were banging? You swore you looked like Ariana Grande and Troye Sivan in that one music video? (Jimin was the one who showed that meme to you, by the way.)

“So I won't call you honey. Just babe.”

“Ew.” You quickly retaliated.

“Ohh, the homophobia is sho-wing.” Jimin sing-sang, ever the mature individual he was.

“Fuck off, seriously.”

Jimin just giggled and then scooted closer to you. “No but like, are you coming? ‘Cause jokes aside, I'm just gonna find someone else if you really don't wanna do it. But you know you're always my first choice.”

“First choice when you do some stupid shit.” you countered, rolling your eyes for the nth time that night. Jimin would be the cause of your eye surgery if ever they got dislocated or something.

“That’s my biggest act of love.”

“I don't want it.”

“I’ll double what I paid you last year.”

“Double it again and give it to the next person?”

Jimin flipped you off. “I’ll give you my nintendo and I’ll get you a card at that coffee shop you love so much.”

That caught your attention. You raised your brow. “On god?”

“When did I ever lie to you?”

You deadpanned. “We won't finish this conversation if I list all the times—”

“Okay, okay, point taken. But I'm really serious. Please, please, please, please be my pretend girlfriend on my mom's birthday party please, please—”

“Shut up. Ugh,” you could already feel the big smile creeping up Jimin’s face when you let out a big sigh. “Okay, I’ll do it. Buy me boba now.”

Jimin tackled you to the bed and hugged you and kissed your forehead.

“Thank you! Best best friend ever.” he delightfully said, grinning widely, eyes almost disappearing in his triumph.

Your face contorted into a disgusted expression while Jimin just laughed as you pushed him so hard he almost fell off the bed.

“You are a disgusting limpy sack of dicks! Also, I’m not your best best friend, you don't have a wide selection. I'm your best friend. Period.”

“Unfortunately.” He waved you off and when you were about to retort something his phone suddenly rang. You watched quietly as he put it over his ear. “Hey, you just landed?”

If it was a private conversation Jimin would've left the room but since he didn't, you decided to stay in bed, kind of listening in to the conversation, but also not, as you turned the volume down of the show you were watching earlier on your laptop.

“Nah, you want me to pick you up?” Jimin sat up on the edge of the bed and you looked at him curiously. “Sure, I’m free, Kook. You have a place to stay? Hotel suite or something?” He nodded to whatever the other person was saying on the other line. “Oh, you're here for three months? Thought you were just flying in for mom's birthday?”

It was moments after they said goodbye that Jimin turned to you to ask, “Well, my cousin’s apparently staying here for three months. Got this job thing going on.”

“Is that one of the non-problematic twenty percent cousin lineage of your very complicated family tree?" You asked, referring to him telling you one time that his family, including the extended ones, was eighty percent shitty and twenty percent decent.

Jimin chuckled at the inside joke. "Well, yeah, he's one of the good ones. Knows I'm gay."

"Oh, nice."

Jimin stood up from your bed. “I’ll get you your boba and head off. Gotta pick cousin up or he’ll start throwing tantrums at the airport.”

“Add extra pearls please.” You told him, watching as he clicked away on his phone to get you your drink.

“I spoil you too much.” Jimin said, clicking his tongue, eyes still on his phone.

“What are you here for if not my glorified sugar daddy?”

“I will kill myself in front of you.” Jimin deadpanned, getting a chuckle out of you.

You didn't know the psychology — or if there even was psychology — behind feeling embarrassed when you were about to cross a path while carrying huge boxes. It was a normal task, and yet, it always felt like a huge walk of shame when you did it.

It was probably because you had to carry it over a flight of stairs, and there was no way you wouldn't trip on yourself carrying two heavy boxes in your hands that were already disrupting your vision.

Maybe it was your fault for choosing the pick-up option when you were checking out these furniture online, all because there was a huge increase on the fee for door-to-door delivery. For the record, there was a huge gap and the boxes were not really that heavy to the point you could not carry them both. It's just a lamp and a portable desk, you thought a week ago when you opted for the pick-up option, I could carry it all the way to the unit just fine — and obviously, your delusion has resulted to this very moment.

As soon as you managed to walk over five steps, you felt as if your oxygen supply just got cut back, panting like someone fresh from a marathon. Damn. You definitely needed to work out a little. Maybe do some squats for your New Year’s resolution, commit to it for three days straight then forget about it for the next 362 days of the year.

You looked ahead of you and a string of curses let themselves out of your mouth automatically as you estimated the number of stairs you needed to get through to get to your apartment.

This day sucked! It was Sunday and you planned to wake up at five am to have a productive day but then you slept through your five alarms and woke up at eleven am instead. You ran out of eggs and you had to go to the convenience store to eat a sad meal of yogurt and kimbap. And now there were these boxes that you needed to carry over what seemed to look like six million of stairs. You weren't Sisyphus! And where were your goddamn neighbors when you needed them?

"You need help, ma'am?"

"Jesus Christ—" you turned to look to your right only to see a man who seemed to own the previous voice.

And Jesus Christ, indeed.

He was wearing a white shirt and some shorts, Nike sliders on his feet and a pair of headphones on. He was wearing glasses. And he had a tattoo sleeve.

What the fuck.

What the fuck!

It has been so long since you thought a man was crazily attractive. Okay, well sure, the guys from the IT department were something else (or you just had a weird eyeglasses fetish, Jimin once pointed out, that you still — to this day — vehemently try to deny) but you’ve never been this taken aback by someone’s face before.

The guy’s lips tilted a bit, some sort of greeting maybe, and you quickly looked away, embarrassed, fearing that he caught you looking at him longer than necessary.

Oh god. This was pathetic! He was a stranger! He was a man! He just had a cute face attached to a very good body with an arm full of tattoos and he was tall but you were sure he wasn’t six feet two. Also, he had hair that looked fluffy from where you stood and a pair of eyeglasses but Jimin was just bluffing when he said you had a fetish for them. Right?

You were performing mental gymnastics until you realized he was asking a question.

"Oh! Uh, no, thank you. It's fine." You said, embarrassed at the way you almost jumped in surprise earlier.

But the whole thing was ridiculous. What, because there was a very fine man across from you the universe suddenly decided to fuck up your fate by making you be seen by that very man struggling with boxes all the way up to your unit? Couldn't it just have been on a day when you did your make-up and dressed up in that overpriced dress you bought hundred bad choices ago?

You fumbled with the boxes a little bit before continuing your way up, nevermind the guy whose response you didn't wait for because you needed to get the fuck away from him before you say something weird and off-putting.

Truthfully, you could use the help. But at what cost? A fine man carrying them? Okay, that wasn’t so bad. But what were you supposed to do with... all of that?

As if the universe was indeed trying to prove to you that you were, in fact, not its favorite creation, you almost tripped. And the guy most definitely saw it.

Fuck.

You turned to the side to see him looking at you, concern etching his face. You wanted to convince yourself that it was genuine concern because you'd commit something that would totally change the trajectory of his life if he was to laugh.

But you thought his own unit must be way up as well, as he was going to the same path as you, and if that was the case, he must have been a new neighbor in the complex because you've never seen the man before.

“Well, it’s not that heavy but…” you trailed off, looking blankly at the cardboard boxes. And then at him. "I could use some help, if you don't mind."

The guy just chuckled. Oh wow, his laugh was very... low.

You didn’t even know what the fuck that meant.

“I’ll get them for you.” He said, crossing the small distance between you and taking over the pile, leaving you with nothing in your hands.

“Oh, no, I’ll have that one. It’s fine.” You said, stepping closer to take the other one but he was already securing it in his hold, with stability this time, ready to take off.

He let out a small laugh again and you bit your tongue to not think about how cute he looked. If he was a new tenant, you hoped you didn't cross paths with him ever again.

"It's okay, ma'am."

He's got to stop calling you that before you do something drastic.

“It’s quite far from here, I'm all the way up to three-three-six.” You uttered, pointing forward, a few steps behind the guy, who hummed at what you said.

You quickly caught up to him. "Really, thanks for doing this."

"No problem, it's nothing." He said, smiling at you. Warm and kind. All cute. "I'm all the way up to four-four-six as well."

Your eyes widened. "No way, that's just across mine."

The stranger, apparently your neighbor now, grinned.

"Nice coincidence, huh?"

A sheepish smile formed on your lips. You didn't dwell on that comment too much. Knew it was just small talk.

"If you don't mind me asking, are you a new tenant here?” You asked out of genuine curiosity. You had never seen someone come out of the unit across from you out of all the four years you'd been here.

He nodded, agreeing with what you presumed.

"Yeah. Just temporary, though.”

“Oh…” A surprised sound. Maybe it was a good thing he was only staying temporarily... “I hope I didn’t inconvenience you or anything. You really don’t need to bring the boxes over to my apartment.”

The man just chuckled, dismissing your worry. “You looked like you could use a hand, these boxes are big. Anyway, I was just out checking 'round town. Settling in.”

From the sound of it, you'd assume he was not only moving in in a new apartment complex, but new city as well. Perhaps country? But he most definitely looked Korean. But maybe he came from abroad. Who knows.

“Yeah, there's a really nice coffee shop three blocks away. You should check it out sometime. Ji—my friend and I are obsessed with their iced caramel macchiato. And the boba.”

His brows furrowed in pure interest. “That must've been the one I passed by this morning. I’ll make sure to try that one.”

“You really should. And the barista gives you a brownie on Sundays if he likes you.” You shared like it was gossip, mentally taking note to visit the cafe sometime this week.

“And I'm sure not everybody gets the privilege?” The guy looked at you funny, and that made you laugh.

"Of course, yes! You have to earn it, I think. I feel like I spent over a million there before he started giving me brownies."

"Hope my charm works on him as well," he said, and it caught you off guard.

What did he mean, "as well"? Like he was speaking from the basis that you had charm and so he hoped he had it as well to get the barista to like him?

"Well. He's strict." Was all you could say, before you spotted your apartment. "Hey, I'll take it over from here."

The guy looked over the plated number on the door, reading three-three-six just as you said earlier. Trudging forward, he set the boxes down on the side of the porch.

"Thank you, really. This was really nice of you."

You extended your gratitude once again as if you didn't spend the walk up to here thanking him non-stop, sounding like a broken record. Thank god the guy didn't seem to mind your over-the-top gratitude, only waving his hand.

"Told you, it's fine. You need help with a few boxes again and just ring me up across," He joked, turning around slightly and looking at the door across your unit, Unit 446. It earned a chuckle from you. His face turned serious now, but there was still a charming smile on his face. “Hey. I’m actually pretty new in this town. I was thinking about visiting a few restaurants downtown, maybe you could recommend me some?”

You didn't mean to, but you took note the way his doe eyes seemed to shimmer even behind the frame of his glasses.

“My favorites are just, like, a ten-minute walk away. There’s this restobar near that drugstore when you turn left from this building, right?” The guy nodded, and you were slightly delighted he knew right away. “Yeah, their ramen's great, you'd thank me forever.”

He chuckled at the way you said it and you smiled.

Your interactions with new people were always a range from pure silence to oversharing; talking to them like they were your long lost friend whom you’ve milked goats with in your father’s orchard. It was probably just a product of introversion; not knowing the right approach to socializing.

“Thanks for the recommendation.” He said, a genuine appreciative tone lacing his words.

“You’re welcome. If I can ring you up to help me with some boxes, you can ring me up for some restaurant recommendation.”

"It's an exchange, then. Deal."

"Why not?" You shrugged, laughing along with him when he did so.

You both stood there for a while until seconds passed. You didn’t know exactly how to end the conversation, not that you wanted to, but there was nothing that went to your head to talk about more. And besides, he was probably headed somewhere, so you began to speak.

“Hey, so I’m going in—”

“What about we—”

“Oh.” You stopped. “Sorry, what was that?”

The guy just shook his head. “Nah, you’re probably busy. Thanks for the recommendation again.”

“No, seriously, sorry I didn't hear it the first time...”

“I was just gonna ask about the name of the restaurant.”

“It’s Midday Miso.” You told him, smiling.

“Midday Miso,” The guy nodded, “Yeah. Got it. Thanks again.”

“You’re welcome, and, uh, thanks. For the help.”

You took your keys out from your shorts and you didn’t expect to still see him standing in front of you when you turned around. You jokingly squinted your eyes at him.

“Yeah, you first, get in.” He said with a low chuckle.

It was a little embarrassing and pretty stupid how your heart fluttered a bit at that.

“What a gentleman you are,” You respond with a snort, opening the door to your unit and pushing the boxes inside your apartment. When they were in, you turned to look at the guy again, saying, “Okay, bye for real. See you around. Hope you like Midday Miso if you try it. And the coffee shop. It's called Brown Coffee.”

“See you around.” He did a little wave that made you both laugh before you closed the door.

When the lock system clicked, you stood on your doorway for a little while.

And then fake-cried.

You quickly clicked on Jimin's pinned contact on your phone.

You [5:35pm]: JIMINNNNNNNNN You [5:35pm]: POP EMERGENCY You [5:35pm]: POP EMERGENCY BITCH IF U DONT RESPOND You [5:36pm]: I HAVE A DIABOLICAL CRUSH AND ITS GOING IN THE MEMOIRRRRRR

It wasn’t even one full minute when Jimin replied.

cuntress #1 [5:37pm]: oh my god SHUT UP!!! im at a training program for ghis stupid ass company my fathers been running fir 600 years cuntress #1 [5:37pm]: whats up cuntress #1 [5:38pm]: its always a crush and never a job 😒

You [5:39pm]: yeh so remember when i told u im oacking up my vagina last summer

cuntress #1 [5:39pm]: many such times

You [5:40pm]: 🖕 You [5:40pm]: SO raincheck!!! You [5:41pm]: COZ I just met a fine man at my apartment AND flirted with him You [5:41pm]: i think

cuntress #1 [5:42pm]: ohhhhh OK???? cuntress #1 [5:43pm]: cuntress #2 flirting???? now thats not uninteresting go on while i fake a restroom break 👀

You [5:45pm]: this story is not for the imessages baby get ur ass up and ICE CREAM WITH ME NOW.

cuntress #1 [5:46pm]: omg 😭😭😭😭 cuntress #1 [5:46pm]: i’ll be off 7:30pm wait for me 😭😭😭 cuntress #1 [5:47pm]: i also have #stories to tell

You [5:49pm]: 🤭

There must be a time where you finally grow up and learn to cook.

You were a twenty-eight-year-old woman and yet, your meals sadly ranged from instant noodles, canned goods, and food from the nearby twenty-four-hour provision shop. Sometimes, you had the gall to cook something from scratch—but with scratch you meant scratching off the labels from food take-outs and reheating them in your microwave.

Jimin had told you one time you would die at twenty-nine with your lifestyle. You told him he couldn't tell you shit because he didn't know how to cook either, he just worked out and ate healthy stuff, and you did, too! But Jimin knew you, and in an evil manner, clocked you with, "Buying fresh produce and not consuming them does not count as healthy living."

Anyway, you never understood why you were so bad at cooking. Your mother, as you remembered her, was decent at it but you guessed it was because she never really taught you and you never really bothered, either. In some immature way of thinking, you'd like to think it was a win for feminism as you were battling patriarchal standards by not conforming to stereotypical "female" qualities. But deep inside, you knew cooking should be a survival skill.

Well, maybe Jimin was right and you would indeed die at the ripe age of twenty-nine. On the bright side, at least you wouldn't have to pay off your student loans and your monthly rent.

In relation, not knowing how to cook meant impractical visits to the restaurant, and that was how you ended up at Midday Miso for dinner after your shift.

It was only a little over seven pm when you entered the restaurant, the ahjumma quickly greeting you and preparing your usual, a sign of familiarity that implied your countless visits ever since moving in at your current apartment building.

Regular visits meant usual sitting spot, and in your case, it was the high stools that faced the glass walls of the restaurant's facade where you could see the busy street making that little area of the town alive.

As minutes overlapped with one another, your food was served and you were hit with the waft of the restaurant's delightful signature beef ramen and bibimbap that the ahjumma made sure to add extra beef on.

Eating with a happy heart made you feel like nothing in the world mattered but you and the food before you, so, you didn't pay attention to the person who was coming to your direction and eventually sat beside you, but what caught you off guard was when said person suddenly said,

"Hi."

When you turned to the side to see who it was, your eyes widened as you said in both recognition and surprise, "Unit 446?"

"That's me." He, Unit 446—in the flesh—said with a low chuckle, twisting himself so that he was sat appropriately on the high stool. Still, his body leaned towards you when he continued to say, "Fancy seeing you here."

You grinned, flattered at the casualness of his approach.

"Same to you. I wonder who told you about this local gem."

He pursed his lips. "A nice neighbor across my place... whom I still don't know the name of."

"Oh, shoot!" You'd face-palm right now if he wasn't looking, but truthfully, you didn't even think about that! You've just been referring to him as the Staircase Guy slash Neighbor 446 in your head and when you told Jimin about him. You laughed at the thought. "That neighbor of yours is __."

Neighbor 446 nodded and extended his hand to you

"I'm Jungkook."

It was a little silly but you shook hands, anyway, and knowing it was, indeed, silly, you both laughed together at your joint connection.

Jungkook. Huh. Not exactly a common Korean name, but it wasn't rare either. The name does ring a bell though, felt like you've heard it somewhere before.

You brushed off the familiarity as inconsequential.

Unlike the completely casual attire he adorned the first time that you met him, he was now in some sleek slacks and a white polo which sleeves were ridden up half high, which exposed the vines of ink on his right arm once again. There's a coat that hung around the back of his chair, and he had forgone the glasses this time around, which was a bit of a shame on the part of your brain that might have a silly crush on him.

Jungkook's clothes seemed to mirror your own business casual ensemble, and that made you think about what he possibly did for a living. Maybe he worked a corporate job just like you, and the prospect might have made you down a little—only because as far as you were concerned, corporate people weren't the most pleasant people you could encounter—but it was not something you dwelled on too much because you couldn't care less. If Jungkook was corporate, he sure didn't seem to be one the way he was.

Besides, you wouldn't be the one to bring up the depressing and aggravating conversation about gross grown-up things like... jobs... Eurgh. You both could just talk about the weather or how insane the ahjumma's ramen tasted for eternity.

"Well, hello, Jungkook." You greeted him. All warm and soft, testing the syllables of his name on your tongue. Rolled off well enough. He had a nice name that sure fit his face for some reason.

"Hi, __." He mirrored the soft smile on your lips, and just as he said it, the ahjumma was heading towards your direction to give him his order.

In that usual way grandmas reacted, the ahjumma gasped audibly—and dramatically, might you add—upon seeing Jungkook, but what she said next made you want to dig a hole under your seat.

"__-dear! Is this young man your boyfriend?"

Good thing you weren't consuming anything as of that moment, because it would've entered the wrong track.

"Ahjumma!" You laughed, totally not authentic at all because your face didn't match it, looking at Jungkook who just sent a shy smile her way.

Ahjumma must have seen you both talking to each other and had completely jumped to a conclusion. An insane one at that! 

Shaking your head, you clarified, "This is Jungkook. A friend. He's new in town and checking out all the stuff around here. I recommended him this place."

You saw Jungkook nodding along with your words while he helped her set his table.

The ahjumma just shook her head. "I apologize, then," She looked at Jungkook and as if gossiping with him, whispered in a not very subtle way, "I keep on telling this girl to date already! Such young beauty shouldn't be wasted, you know."

A tsk-ing sound made its way through her mouth, and as much as you were starting to feel embarrassed that she was telling on you on Jungkook—who was literally a stranger to you a day ago and whom you may have a teeny tiny bit of crush on—you knew ahjumma did not have any malicious intent and just chose to laugh the whole thing off.

You heard Jungkook do the same.

This was ridiculous.

"Ahjumma, I told you, you're gonna be the first one to know when I date. For now I'm just a part-time accountant and a full-time promoter of Midday Miso." You pout at her, trying to dodge the topic of romance altogether.

Not in front of Jungkook.

"Ayee," She gave you a side-eye. "Fine. I'll bring over some extra beef."

You mouthed an enthusiastic "yes!" and raised your fist in the air with excitement, and Jungkook looked at the interaction with a smile on his face.

As the ahjumma walked away, you looked over at him.

"I'm glad you came by—" You identified his order to be the same one you used to be obsessed with the first few months you came to the restaurant. "—and ordered their best seller. You sure know how to be a tourist."

"Looked good on the menu. The ahjumma also seems to be nice. Seems like she's a close friend, huh?" Jungkook said.

"Totally."

And it was the truth. There was just something about ahjumma that made you feel reminiscent about the grandmother you've never had. Ever since you moved in and became a regular at this place, it felt like she's taken care of you and your relationship had been special since.

"This is really good." Jungkook commented after having his second bite, and you nodded in agreement. "She was serious about the beef thing?"

You chuckled at the mention. "Yeah, she always gives me extra."

"You just always get free stuff around these areas?" Jungkook joked which earned a hearty laugh from you. You remembered telling him about the free brownie on Sundays at Brown Coffee, a little bit surprised he recalled that.

"Now that you said that, I actually do." You proudly shared. You've been in this town for so long that the various faces just went from familiar to friends.

Jungkook nodded, his face showing amusement.

"I have to learn your ways, then."

"The secret to that is be incompetent at cooking. It means it's either take-out or eat out. Business owners around here have no choice but to see me every three days because I can't cook my own meal."

You could see Jungkook's amusement growing every second, and to add faux insult to injury, he joked, "Oh, bummer."

You decided to ride along with that.

"You mean you're a good cook? That's the real bummer! And here I thought we were bonding." You said, purposefully trying to sound scandalous at his implication of being a good cook.

He shook his head instantly, chuckling. "Okay, nah. I'm not that good. Just decent. But I'll have you know I can make a mean tangsuyuk. Any other complicated stuff is out the window, so there, we are bonding."

"I appreciate that you're under the assumption that I know where to begin with the non-complicated stuff. You're already putting way too much faith in me."

"I seriously doubt that." Jungkook laughed once again.

"You know what my friend tells me? That I'd die at twenty-nine because I don't know how to cook."

Jungkook almost keeled over hearing you say the words, and as much as you were amused at his own amusement, you decided to further add on the joke because you were enjoying this way too much.

"Wow. I wouldn't doubt you'd be an accessory to my murder the way you're laughing way too hard at my impending death. That's next year, you know."

Jungkook reached over for the glass of water and drank it. While he did so, the ahjumma had come over to give you the beef she promised. You did not forgot to thank her as soon as she went away. 

You did hope Jungkook didn't notice the malicious wink she sent your way.

"Fuck, sorry." Jungkook's laughter had gone down this time, but his eyes still showed a hint of mirth when he asked, "You're twenty-eight, then?"

You nodded. "Yep." Unfortunately, you thought.

"Oh, that's actually surprising."

A gasp left your mouth. Jungkook was quick to correct himself.

"I meant it's surprising because I thought you were way younger."

Oh.

"Don't flatter me. I won't share my extra beef with you."

"I thought—" He shrugged. "—Early twenties."

"I'm guessing you are in your early twenties." You joked back.

"Okay, now, don't flatter me. I know how old I look." Jungkook said with a dismissive tone, but nevertheless light-hearted. Just like how this whole thing was going.

God, you were so in awe of how good he was at talking to you that he was practically bringing out the extrovert in you you only ever show to exclusive people like Jimin.

"So, you're like, fifty, then?"

Incredulous, Jungkook burst into laughter. "Wow."

"Sorry, just that you sounded like you were five years from retirement! Anyway, you look like we're the same age?"

He shook his head. "Three years older. Turning thirty-one later this year."

Jaw dropped. Not physically, but mentally.

"Oh wow, you're basically—" a fucking DILF! What the hell!

Thankfully you managed to cut yourself off before Jungkook could think you were way off your rocks and embarrass yourself in front of him for eternity. You could just hear Jimin from miles away telling you off about calling thirty-year-old men DILFs even though you didn't know if they had a child.

What do you mean this guy was thirty and why did that just make him even hotter in your head... He's got to stop this madness before you do something completely incomprehensible.

"—A senior." Was the lame thing you came up with to finish your sentence.

"Ouch." Jungkook said, but his word was completely opposite to the expression he was wearing on his face the way he just couldn't suppress the grin that had been visible on his mouth since you started talking.

You brought your hands up.

"Totally didn't mean that in a negative way."

Which was the entire truth. So far, the things you knew about him was that he had tattoos, a nice body, a nice personality, good ass freaking conversationalist, and that he was thirty! Thirty! As in, the peak of male hotness. The evil psychological concept of most men only getting hotter as they age.

"I'm sure, I'm sure," Jungkok nodded. "By the way, are you heading out after this?"

"Oh, yeah. Don't have anywhere else to go. I have a nine A.M tomorrow so..." you shrugged, and he nodded in understanding.

"You work as an accountant, right, from what you told the ahjumma?" Jungkook asked you curiously.

"Yeah... it's a very tedious job." You grimaced a little bit. "What about you?"

He tilted his head a bit, picking up a dumpling on his plate. "I'm a software engineer."

"Oh, that's cool."

You nodded to yourself while you processed what he said.

Works in fucking tech; another thing you just learned about him. 

You weren't actively seeking out guys in tech, but why did they seem to come to you voluntarily? God forbid you saw someone who wasn't in there! Was every man working in tech now? Was Jimin really only being truthful when he said they were exactly your type?

"Have you made any software or is that, like, a wrong assumption about you guys?"

Jungkook merely chuckled at your retort.

"Not entirely, no. I've designed a few software in college—I'm still doing it. I'm just currently doing more business stuff now." He gave you a sheepish smile. "You?"

"Well, it's just... you know—I actually work at a tech company. I'm a junior accountant. And, uh, nothing interesting, really. You get to do cool math like programming, and I get to do boring math like calculating money I don't have. It's always a great day at work." You said, couldn't help the laugh that skipped your mouth at your own sarcasm.

Nothing like joking about hating your job to someone who you just met yesterday.

"Programming and coding are not all that, either. It's tedious and... it's just a really boring job. But... it all pays the bills."

You chuckled.

"Yeah. Totally."

Without minding it, you raised the small glass of soju, initiating a toast, one that Jungkook understood immediately and met you in the middle of it.

The night was still you when you walked out of Midday Miso, but unlike any other nights, it was with Jungkook this time walking beside you.

"So you just—what—hid him for three months?"

"Well, yes! I wasn't about to get a notice for that! And besides, he was really cute. But he's in good hands now, his owner still sends me pictures of him. He's very grown and big."

"That's insane."

You peered at Jungkook who watched you in awe as you told him about the story of Alfredo, the cat whom you rescued on your way home from work a year ago. The landlady obviously had her fair share of rules and regulations in her building, and keeping pets was an absolute no, which was a shame. Definitely wasn't a shame when you first just moved in the complex, but things got lonely sometimes when you were living alone and company was almost a luxury.

Anyway, as told, you managed to keep Alfredo out of the landlady's sight until you found a highly qualified parent on some online forum who you still kept in contact with to this day.

But as you watched Jungkook, you noticed the way his expression fell into something concerning. He looked worried, which made you feel the same way as a result.

"What are you thinking?" You asked him curiously.

"Oh, nah, I was just... thinking. See, I actually have a dog."

"Oh!" You looked at him wide-eyed.

He has a dog; another thing about Jungkook that would qualify him on the regular rounds of hot boy of the month on Twitter dot com. 

"Yeah."

"You didn't read the terms and conditions of the building?" Your eyebrows formed a concerned expression.

Jungkook chuckled and shook his head. "I did. I just—suddenly thought about him, is all. He's being taken care of some place. But, you know, I missed him, and I was thinking about getting him here and showing him around my new place and all that."

"Oh... that's a bummer, then. The landlady's strict, even with the small dogs, can you imagine? Is he small, by the way, your dog?

"He's a Doberman, so definitely a big one."

"He must be really cute. What's his name?"

"Bam." He smiled at you, and you could totally see the pride showing on his face at the mention of his dog. And with a tone that you could only identify as someone who's suppressing his enthusiasm a little bit, he added, "You wanna see a picture of him?"

"Sure!"

Jungkook took out his phone from his pocket and showed you images of a big, chocolate brown dog. Bam definitely wasn't like the other regular Dobermans you'd see around. His ears weren't cropped, and his tail wasn't docked either. You didn't know if the lack of surgery was intentional from his side, but you'd like to think he kept it that way because he knew it hurt the dog greatly. From how you've been knowing him, you were certain he just didn't want to put his dog under unnecessary pain, which was honestly heartwarming to think about.

Jungkook was becoming way too good to be true in you head little by little.

"Awe, he's adorable!" You cooed, especially when he swiped through the picture of his pet, Bam, as a pup in what seemed to be Jungkook's arms based on the familiar tattoos that peeked from the exposed arm as seen on the picture. The tattoos also seemed to be new at that time as well, considering that the skin was still yet to be fully covered like now.

"I'm flattered you think that."

"Where is he, by the way? If you don't mind me asking."

"He's at a... friend's place in New York. He's not very good at flying so I didn't bring him with me here, and I thought, I'll only be here for three months, anyway, so." Jungkook shrugged.

Three months. Well. He did say he was only staying here temporarily.

You nodded. "For business, right?"

"Yeah, yeah."

"You grew up there?" You kicked the stone that was caught at the tip of your shoe, putting your fists in the deeper part of your coat's pockets. Summer may be hot during daytime, but it sure as hell was cold on nights like these.

"Nah, I'm from Busan. Flew to California for college and have been there since. Until now, that is."

Jimin was also from Busan, you thought. Though he said they only lived there for a few years until his parents moved to Seoul, but he made sure to visit his hometown every now and then. Most of the time, he made you come with him which you never had complaints about. You lived in the city all your life so going there, especially in the more urbanized area where you and Jimin stayed. Felt like fresh air—which Busan had, quite literally.

"My best friend's from Busan too."

"Really? What about you?"

You chuckled before answering, "I, unfortunately, did not come from any interesting place. Born and raised in Seoul, through and through. Though my mom told me she lived in Daegu for many years prior to having me."

"Seoul is an interesting place, though."

"Eh. It's okay." You shrugged, and your nonchalance made you both laugh.

The walk to your apartment building from Midday Miso was not that far. Still, it was five blocks away and while you and Jungkook were currently sharing conversation together and seemingly walking the same path, you weren't sure if you were both walking together there.

As if he read your mind, he suddenly spoke after a few minutes of comfortable silence.

"You mind if we walk together to the building?"

You decided to joke to get the jittery feeling out of your system.

"Scared of the dark, Jungkook?"

"Sure... my five-eleven self is."

You squinted your eyes at him. He did not just go there!

"Is that a slight against my height because I'm five-seven, mind you."

Jungkook stopped in his tracks which made you do the same, and you watched as he put his hand on his waist while the other reach up to his face to place a finger over his chin, seemingly assessing you up and down. You looked at him incredulously.

"You're bumping your height to two inches." He seriously said.

You gasped audibly.

"Oh, shut up,"

You rolled your eyes and turned your back at him, continuing your walk as you heard him behind you bursting in laughter at your reaction.

"I'm kidding!"

You first met Jimin at a college party. He was five years older than you, supposedly out of college by the time you attended, but he always had a problem with rebellion–what with his ragged relationship with his parents, he would intentionally flunk his courses as a message to them that he'd always be a black sheep and a proud one at that, hoping it would be enough to convey that they could not force him to be the heir of their company. (Obviously, it had taken him nowhere, given that he was now currently attending a training program to work at said company).

But maybe it was a blessing in disguise that he was set back to five years for graduation. Because you got to know him, and he got to know you.

On the outside, you might look like the total opposite of each other–because Jimin was the definition of extroversion who wasn't afraid to put himself out there–while you, admittedly, were more reserved and usually shied away from any public attention.

As much as you were welcoming to a lot of people, you didn't have a lot of close friends growing up–at least not the kind of friends you'd see on TV shows–but when Jimin came to your life, you clicked so instantly you could not even figure out where you two exactly began.

The instant way you two clicked, you realized, was like your relationship with Jungkook nowadays.

Ever since that night at Midday Miso, you've been seeing a lot of each other. Granted that it was only in the same place, same time. You'd usually arrive past seven and he, a few minutes later. Jungkook, cladded in his slacks and long-sleeved polo, was becoming a usual sight after a shift, and your business casual clothes was turning as one for him as well.

Your usual seating spot became his as nights passed, and ahjumma, thank God, no longer asked you if he was your boyfriend. You were glad that she was slowly getting acquainted with him though, greeting him with a friendlier smile and tone reserved only for customers like you when he entered the restaurant, and Jungkook seemed to welcome the newfound friendship wholeheartedly.

On the consecutive nights you'd spent with him, it was almost as if you lived quite the same life. Though, you didn't know when he went to work. In fact, you didn't see him during the mornings even though in theory, it could be easy, granted that you both lived across each other. But strangely enough, you'd never caught him retiring to his flat to go to the bus station. You assumed he started earlier than you or way later.

You never asked, it never came up either.

Still, there was some sort of tranquility in the thought that you could spend some time with someone after your shift and just talk about whatever–and whatever meant a lot of things. Random at best. You once told him about the first raccoon you met in your life, and he told you all about the lioness he got to watch when he went to a South Saharan trip a few years ago.

Sometimes, the conversation went around what happened in the office that day. Jungkook noticed the little blot of ink on the cuff of your baby blue long sleeves, and you told him about the jammed printer in the accounting department. He'd told you later on about how he almost fucked up a report, said he was nervous because he was taking on a new role in the office.

Those moments were shared in long walks from Midday Miso to your apartment building, because naturally, you both established a small tradition of walking home together after a night of eating your hearts out at ahjumma's restaurant.

It was a rather sweet gesture, if you were honest to yourself. But you chose not to linger too much on the romantic thoughts that floated in your head, especially when you'd notice the way he made sure to walk on the outer side of the sidewalk, and when your fingers got too close the tips almost touched.

Because Jungkook, for how objectively good looking he was, was more than just his pretty face and physique.

He was kind and funny and genuine unlike any other straight men you've met in your life. Maybe the bar was low, but for all the times you've gotten to talk to him, he never showed any signs of ego most men would by the second hour of your meeting.

In the dating scene as an adult, a lot of men would come up to a date talking about how high they were placed at their company's hierarchy and how much they made in a month, and when they hear about yours, they'd always have a backhanded comment about how "you could only go up from there, right?" and those moments were always a bummer. Yawn-inducing, to be more accurate. Men and their predictability was boring and it was the reason why you'd declare to Jimin almost every time you got home from a date that you were retired from looking for them because most men just plainly fucking sucked.

But with Jungkook... was it different.

You found he didn't talk a lot, and one time you asked him if you were doing it–the talking–way too much, but he just chuckled and told you that he didn't mind.

Later on, you learned that he was just more of a listener rather than a talker, and that was not only a pure assumption of yours because he did listen attentively, alright. As for all the random things you've told him about, you never expected him to recall a single thing, not until one time when you passed by a food truck.

"Hey, didn't you say you like sundae?" Jungkook asked, and when you followed where his eyes were, it was at the food truck parked just a few steps ahead from where you both were.

"I do... wow. It's been so long since I saw a food truck around here." You said, following his steps towards the vehicle.

They had tables to dine in, and even if you were still full from eating at Midday Miso that night, the sundae was just too gratifying to decline. Jungkook was the same with the tteokbokki on his small plate, telling you he missed eating at one of these things, as they didn't exactly have anything like this abroad.

After he paid for the food (and of course not without a long, silly, light-hearted argument about it), he came back with two sticks of Melona ice pops which you looked at with widened eyes, animated expression written all over your face especially when he thrusted the purple yam flavor to you.

"Oh my god, how do they have these?"

"I was surprised as well... this is the first time in a while I'm eating this again." Jungkook said and then gestured to the ice pop in your hand, "You like the purple yam, right?"

"Yeah!"

You were about to ask him how he knew, but then you briefly remembered that one time you had a passionate rant about people hating on purple yam ice cream and why they weren't right.

And as you looked at Jungkook, he seemed to remember it all too well.

Jungkook showed genuine interest in the things you'd tell him about. He'd visit the cafes and restaurants you recommended to him as much as he could, and because you've come to exchange numbers with him eventually after almost two weeks of casually hanging out, they sometimes came during lunch break.

1 message received from Jungkook (Unit 446)

That day, you only exchanged contacts the other night, so seeing him on your phone so quickly like that caught you by surprise. It was welcomed though.

Jungkook (Unit 446) [12:36pm]: I went to Cafe Heaven for lunch and loved their ice americano

As soon as you read the first message, another one came.

Jungkook (Unit 446) [12:36pm]: This is Jungkook by the way :)

You laughed at his introduction. As if he didn't see you type his name on your phone last night–like he didn't jokingly complain about you putting the (Unit 446) in there but giving in eventually and also adding (Unit 336) to yours in his own contacts.

You [12:38pm]: Hi Jungkook! You [12:38pm]: im glad u went!!! u should also try their fettuccine alfredo

Seconds later, he sent a picture of the dish you just mentioned which put a smile on your face.

Jungkook (Unit 446) [12:39pm]: i'll get my refund from you if this doesnt taste good

You [12:40pm]: 1 week of friendship and ur already ripping me off 🤐

Jungkook (Unit 446) [12:40pm]: 😁 Jungkook (Unit 446) [12:40pm]: first bite Jungkook (Unit 446) [12:41pm]: second bite

What was he on, you didn't know. But you were glad that he was slowly coming around, his jokes getting more... how would you say it... less polite? He just stopped apologizing after he said them! He usually would in the first few days, but now in your newfound closeness, it was like you were out of that stage where you tiptoed around each other still, feeling the other one out, trying to figure them out, all that stuff.

Nowadays, it was just more natural. Smooth-sailing. Paradoxical, almost, because of how the relationship felt more defined as well as loose.

You found you liked it that way. 

Jungkook (Unit 446) [12:42pm]: I like it 👍🏻

And to your surprise, he sent you a picture of him, indeed, holding a thumbs up.

You'd like to think you were an expert on going along with the tide because even though you would be classified as introvert by most, you did pretty well in forming relationships with people–granted, most of them were fleeting, at best, hence the lack of bigger circles in most of your life–but you were great with making friends, regardless. 

And maybe it was how you ended up with this whole thing with Jungkook. Because you were friendly and open, although you wouldn't dare to take all credits because as you mentioned before, he was a great conversationalist.

He didn't talk much as you said, but he didn't ever make you feel like you were talking way too much because he made sure that you knew he was listening, and when he talked, it was always engaging; conversations with him transitioned to different subjects in perfect seugue you would never noticed how you jumped from Melona ice pops to the existential dread you fought every morning before going to work.   

When it came to humor, Jungkook's was different from Jimin's, of course, and your dynamic with your best friend could never be replicated with somebody else but Jungkook was close to truly becoming your friend, and for that, it was getting easier to ignore his handsome face.

You may have had an embarrassing moment of panicking mentally at seeing such a man in the first meeting, but nowadays, you could hold a conversation with him without thinking how hot he was.

Dare you say, you were starting to think more platonically about him rather than romantically. As you said, you were an expert on going along with the tide.

Or maybe that was too soon a declaration, because there were moments, like now, when you were certain juvenile flirting insisted on happening between you, steering you clear from completely feeling wholly platonic about Jungkook.

"I certainly have a bigger hand than you."

As if you didn't know that, Jungkook brought his hand up to show you it. Confused but not totally minding the whole thing, you proceeded to extend your own hand towards his, pressing them both together. Predictably, his hand could have engulfed the entirety of your own.

Jungkook laughed at the sight, and you didn't know exactly who broke the physical contact first but you were glad it was over as soon as it started.

But you couldn't have forgotten the electric zap along your spine when your hand got so close like that to his. Couldn't have ignored the hot feeling in your cheeks when you were made aware of what you just did.

Wow.

Were you guys flirting? Was he flirting? It was flirting, right? Juvenile, at best, because this was what kids did in high school! And Jungkook's hand was so...

You never imagined what it felt like–never even crossed your mind until now. Expectations about how his hand felt never formed in your head because you sure as hell never thought about that kind of thing happening in the first place, but Jungkook's hand was the right balance of soft and hard. Calloused in a way most men's hands naturally were, and soft like enough comfort when held and touched.

It wasn't clammy, thank god, but you also wouldn't have thought he had clammy hands, solely because he just looked like he didn't. But god, was it big.

And my goodness, did it make you feel things.

You drank your water fast and cleared your throat, subtly, so that he didn't think too much of it.

"O-okay, but that's just genetics. Doesn't mean you could throw stronger punches."

You said in retaliation to one of your useless debates which now covered the coin-operated boxing arcade machine across the bus station nearby.

Jungkook leaned back against the monobloc chair that was definitely way too flimsy for him.

You were currently hanging out at the dining area of the food truck you came across a few days ago, forgoing Midday Miso for the night. Lately, Jungkook and you have been exploring a few more places other than there. You've tried other restaurants nearby, but ultimately, Midday Miso was still the top favorite and the food truck was becoming a staple in lieu of its convenience and just the overall vibe of eating outside and feeling the breeze of summer night air.

"You got me curious about the boxing machine." Jungkook said, crossing his arms.

"I held the highest score there for like a week, you know? Only did it though to impress the kids who liked to watch."

At that, Jungkook's face lit up in interest.

"We should do that sometime."

"Oh... I see, I see. You wanna impress the kids, too?" You playfully accused, squinting your eyes at him.

He chuckled and waved you off.

"It can be a challenge." Jungkook shrugged and looked at you with a hint of mirth in his eyes.

You let out a puff of breath, amused at his obvious antics.

"What's the catch?"

"Well... free boba delivered to your door for a week if you get the higher score. How's that sound?" He looked at you expectantly.

You chuckled before saying, "I'm gonna rip you off so bad, Jungkook."

"Only if you win, though." He said with a mischievous smirk. 

"Oh, wow. When, you mean. When I win. So what's in it for you?" You leaned your elbow on the table and studied his face.

He looked at you for a while, then, the smirk from earlier was wiped off and exchanged with a much gentler smile.

"Home-cooked dinner at my place next week Friday."

Your eyebrows met.

"You want me to cook you something? Jungkook, do you have a death wish? I may either give you unintentional food poisoning or burn your house down, there's no in between."

"No," Jungkook laughed at your insane conclusion. "Sorry, I should've specified. I mean if you lose, I'll be cooking us a meal at my place."

"Oh."

You were left staring at him, a bit dumbfounded.

He just said he wanted to cook you guys a meal. At his place.

He was inviting you to his place. His personal space.

"It won't be better than Midday Miso but I think I can keep up." Jungkook added with a sheepish smile and scratched the back of his head in that seemingly boyish manner.

"Sure..." you responded, a bit delayed, much to your effort of not showing your big surprise at his offer. Before he noticed the way you were not believing what you heard, you chose to quip in a (hopefully) cheeky, "That is if you win, though."

Jungkook only hummed and then nodded.

"If I win."

He said, smiling at you.

This was dangerous.

The whole thing was teetering to something that was not very platonic, and just as you were starting to think this whole thing was!

Jimin always told you that you were bad at flirting, but in your defense, how were you supposed to know, exactly, if someone was flirting with you? A lot of people were friendly like that! Jungkook was maybe like that? Had you shown interest and he noticed so now he was playing into it? But that would be uncharacteristic of him. You didn't think he'd be the type to do something cruel like that...

But the tide was always rising and falling, they said, and the good thing was; you knew how to go along with the current.

So you did what you do best.

"Would you like to donate to the poor?"

"I'm sorry, ma'am, but there's a chance this card's gonna decline because I am the poor."

The cashier looked you in the eye with an even more impassive look than the one she had before you got your turn on the counter.

"Could've just said no." She said, punching your order away and you had to shamefully swipe your card and leave to go over where Jimin was.

"The cashier just snubbed me for being poor." You complained to Jimin, moving your coat to the next seat and settling in in yours.

Jimin took a sip from his latte and looked at you dead in the eye and said, "I'll call the manager if you want."

"Fuck off." You retaliated immediately. Jimin snorted at your way too predictable response.

See, this has happened way too many times more than what your fingers could count. You could not even pinpoint the exact time when Jimin started to joke about going full-on Karen-mode when you complained about a single little thing at the places you went to.

Anyway, you were currently on a lunch break when Jimin texted to see if you were free. What better way to spend your lunch than with your best friend? The company's canteen food was getting tired and they hiked up their prices. Your office's kitchen also ran out of Solhee's – your coworker – biscuits and so you thought you had to make do of Jimin's money for that day. You told him your motives yourself and as a petty retort, he told you to pay for your own pasta — at a café that was way too expensive for its own good.

You stole a bite off his churros, and predictably, he rolled his eyes at you.

"Why'd you want to see me, by the way? What's up? You don't have training?" you glanced at your wristwatch, reading 12:40pm.

Soon, you were casually taking over his plate of churros. For how ridiculously priced it was, it sure tasted good as hell.

"I got the day off." Jimin shrugged.

You eyed him suspiciously almost immediately.

"Did you really...?"

It was a few seconds before Jimin gave in and took back his plate.

"Okay, no, I ditched the training today but for the record it's for a very important reason."

You put your hand over your chest and contorted your face in an awed, touched expression.

"The important reason being... meeting me?"

"Ew, no," Was Jimin's quick, disgusted, response – which earned a laugh from you as usual.

From your peripheral vision, you saw the waiter heading towards your direction and so you waited for him to come over and serve you your pasta and frappe. After thanking him, you huddled closer to your best friend and asked, "Okay, what is it then?"

Jimi pursed his lips, making your eyebrows meet.

"It's kinda... bummer news."

"You're pregnant?"

"No, you'd be way too happy and I can't be a single dad," He shook his head as if not even wanting to imagine that.

"Namjoon looks like he's gonna take care of it with you." You sing-sang, sipping on your coffee and winking at him indiscreetly – emphasis on indiscreetly because you never knew how to wink properly.

What you did not expect, was the look on Jimin's face when you mentioned Namjoon.

"Well..." He trailed off, and you waited for it curiously; anticipating his impending answer in return because your conversation was always quick-witted like that. But right now, Jimin's expression was devoid of any jokes. 

Not something you expected when you just mentioned his boyfriend.

"I— did something happen?" You quickly dropped the teasing tone and exchanged it with a concerned one, eyes looking at him with worry.

Jimin closed his eyes for a while and let out a deep breath. "See, that's the bummer news."

"Do you want to tell me? Or we can just—"

He cut you off before you could even finish your sentence. But he did it with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes – and this was Jimin. His eyes did not not reach his eyes when he smiled!

"He's going to Italy."

"Oh."

When the pause prolonged for over a minute, with you looking at him mouth agape, Jimin let out a heavy sigh once again and shook his head.

"I know. It's work... and I always understood that. He travels a lot and we're both okay with it. But it was usually just around the country, not another continent. I mean, what did he mean Italy? And that's not even the worst part. He knew a month ago he was going but he only told me two days ago and he's leaving Thursday," Jimin looked at you to take a pause, seemingly trying to look for a reaction.

You thought, that's tomorrow.

As if he read your mind, he nodded, sounding almost defeated.

"I know."

"Oh, Jimin..." You said, not exactly knowing what to say.

Jimin and Namjoon had been together for over a year. At least, officially, because they spent the last three years just casually hooking up on and off. You liked them together and had been more than glad when they finally put a label to it – exactly why you knew Namjoon enough to not badmouth him when you usually would men Jimin usually dated. You knew perfectly well that Namjoon genuinely cared about your best friend and he loved him. So if Jimin was at a loss for this obvious mistake on his boyfriend's part, even more so you were.

"He's been blowing up my phone ever since." Jimin added, glancing at his phone on the table. "Intentionally didn't charge my phone today so I don't receive his calls and texts."

That prompted you to remember the message you received from Namjoon last night.

"Oh, that's why he texted me yesterday. He asked about you, and I told you through text but you didn't answer." Things were starting to make sense now, and as you observed Jimin's face, they were getting clearer. "You never talked since?"

Jimin pursed his lips. He took his coffee back to his mouth and sipped while looking away. "Nope."

"Jimin." You tilted your head.

He looked at you again, and you knew exactly that he was thinking the same thing as you: It was within his right to feel off about what Namjoon did, but regardless; Jimin was being a little petty, and he needed to communicate with his boyfriend instead of giving him the cold shoulder.

There was a pout that formed on Jimin's lips right after.

"I know. I just..."

"He could've told you sooner?" He nodded at your words. You mirrored that. "He should have. Italy is not Busan – it's not just a train ride away."

Jimin sighed, looking exasperated now. "I told him that exactly. I'm not even mad he's going to Italy, I just think I deserve to know right after he was told about it."

You nodded. "You should really talk. It sounds like he wants to apologize, anyway, given that he's now trying to talk to me to get through you."

"Sorry you got caught up in this. I'm gonna talk to him about it."

"Eh, it's fine. Joon and I are also friends, you know?" You shrugged, genuinely not minding Namjoon coming to you. 

You liked Namjoon and thought that he was the perfect match for Jimin. They were cute together and just seemed to... take the best out of each other. You'd go to any lengths to keep them together, as long as Jimin wanted Namjoon and as his boyfriend. You've seen Jimin go from relationships to relationships, some just fleeting and simple dalliances, and most destructive and were just... not good for him. You've never seen your best friend truly happy and committed in a romantic relationship other than with Namjoon, and as someone who cared about him, you'd do a lot of things to make him happy.

"Here's another thing, his flight is tomorrow at 11:30pm in the evening. Mom's birthday dinner is at 10." Jimin usually had his composure everytime, and it was very rarely you'd see him show any worry because he liked everybody to think he was in control of every situation. You smiled. Classic Jimin. He'd only ever show his true nature to you though, and that was exactly why he looked at you with worried eyes and continued to say, "I really wanna be there to send him off."

The call time for his mother's party was at 10 and naturally people would start swarming in way past that time. If Jimin were to sneak out way too early, you knew his mother was not going to be happy about it and his father would give him an even bigger shit for it. Sure, he could cancel, but what would he say? That their supposed cishet son is sending off his boyfriend at the airport for the night? He couldn't reason work either because he didn't exactly have one.

After having his wrongful DUI accusation last spring– which was actually already settled, on the grounds that it was definitely not DUI and the owner of the other car just overreacted to a fender bender, the media was adamant on tactically using that to taint his family's image and it unfortunately succeeded – hence, why Jimin had been laying low these past few months; going to training programs, obeying his parents more than usual, doing what they wanted...

You sighed. Your best friend deserved so much better.

"Don't worry, I'll find a way to get us to leave early." You told him after awhile.

Jimin arched his brow, intrigued.

Waving him off, you said, "I can fake something."

As if hearing some magic words, Jimin suddenly perked up.

"No way you're using the diarrhea card?"

Giving him a dirty look, you shook your head. "Nah, not during a dinner party. It's gotta be something new and less... gross."

"Oh, oh!" Jimin put a finger over his lip. "What about a sprained ankle? Can you pull that off?"

You deadpanned. "Okay, you ought to pay me more if you want me to do that."

"I can, but I won't. Stop ripping me off, I'm your best friend."

"Jimin, I'll save you from your family. I'm great at this." You said jokingly, but you hoped that he knew you weren't just jesting and were serious about it.

With the appreciation masking your best friend's face, though, you knew he got the message right away, but as you looked at him longer, you realize that he was about to say something and you quickly pulled back, shaking your head.

Jimin quickly reacted. "No! You know what, I'm gonna say it—"

"Don't say it." You quickly cut him off, giggling while you shake your cup of coffee.

"You can't keep me from saying I lo—"

"Jimin, I will tell everybody in this place you watch dubbed anime, I'm serious."

He gasped, quite dramatically.

"You did not just go there!" Then, he lowered his voice a bit, arching his brow at you, vindicative when he said, "You wore skinny jeans a month ago."

"How dare you, you wore a fuckass poncho last week. I saw on your IG story."

"That was from Namjoon and he also gave you one, FYI."

You grimaced. "Tell him I love him but I'm not wearing a poncho, Jimin."

"I was gonna tell you I love you and that you're the best person ever but now I have to rethink all of that." He rolled his eyes, and when the banter ended with you having the last words, you laughed at his face.

"God, you're just never beating me at this."

"Please, we both know you write your mediocre insults on your diary every night trying to one-up me, __. But let's talk about something else."

"I'm not even gonna acknowledge the diary thing but, sure, shoot." You said, starting to eat your pasta.

Jimin looked at your food full of judgement and grimaced. "Is that shrimp? Your doctor is growing grey pubes as we speak," He commented, and you knew he was referring to your shrimp allergy so you shushed him.

"This is vegan shrimp. It's tofu."

He just shook his head, disagreement written on his face. But he let it pass, anyway.

"Anyway, how's Mr. 446?"

The pasta suddenly entered the wrong track.

"Girl," Jimin was quick to offer you the glass of water on his side and you were just as fast to drink it. "You okay?"

"I'm sure there are existing cases of people dying because food got on the wrong track while they're eating, but yeah, sure, I'm okay." When you finished the water, you looked at Jimin who was just doing the same thing.

Crossing his arms, he eyed you expectantly. "Well?"

"I mean... what do you want me to say?" you told him, and you could've sworn you did not want to show anything on your face but you were certain there was a huge smile on it and for some reason, you couldn't help it.

Jimin's jaw dropped, expressions of disbelief and amusement when he asked you curiously, "What do you mean by that?"

"Okay, look, Jimin—" You scratched the back of your head, feeling a little sheepish to tell him all about Jungkook. "He told me we'd get dinner at his place this Friday if he wins this... thing."

His mouth was agape by then and you couldn't help but laugh.

"You... slut."

You would absolutely be rolling off the floor if you weren't at a public place the moment he mouthed the word, but still, you couldn't help but retort back.

"Shut up, you can't be the only one whoring around in this friendship." Jimin snorted at that and you both had to stifle your laughter when you noticed a woman from across the room eyeing you both.

This was one of the reasons why Jimin and you didn't belong in public places other than bars or clubs – because you were way too rowdy together for civilization.

"So you're saying you're whoring around?" He eyed you suspiciously.

"Wrong information. It's actually kind of platonic."

Jimin quickly waved you off. "Babe, if a guy invites you to his place, nothing is ever platonic about it. What do you think you'll do together there? Stare at each other for two hours straight?"

God, you hated and loved that he enables your delusions.

"Okay, you're being insane about this. It's just dinner," Trying to fight off the not-so-very-platonic things that suddenly played in your head after hearing his previous remark. To show that you didn't care, you added for good measure, "—And anyway, we had some sort of deal about it so it's not definite."

Your best friend just shrugged. "I'm all for it. But you're sure he isn't a serial killer, right?"

"Jimin, god, no," you chuckled at that. "I mean, I don't really know for sure, but we're friends now and as far as I know, he's never shown signs of psychopathy."

Jimin and you hadn't hung out in a while, so you haven't really told him all about Jungkook yet and the things you got to know about him. He didn't even know his name. As far as he was concerned, Jungkook was still Mr. 446, and you were fine keeping it that way. He had a lot on his plate right now, anyway.

"Just being cautious." He sing-sang, putting both his hands in the air.

You shook your head.

"Anyway, we also need to talk about what we're gonna wear tomorrow," Jimin suddenly said. "You got the Pinterest board I sent you, right? For the inspo."

Grinning, you grabbed your iPad from your bag and got to the link immediately. Your phone died on the way to the café. Good thing you had another device and brought it with you.

"I also added a few things in here. Gold and black's the theme, right?" You clarified, scrolling through the board you and Jimin both contributed to. Your best friend took it upon himself to transfer seats so he could be beside you and look at your screen at the same time.

"You're gonna look so good in Schiaparelli, babe," Jimin said while checking out the pictures you added.

"It's just an inspo, I don't actually need to wear a Schiaparelli." You chuckled.

"Who do you think your best friend is?"

You both laughed at that but it stopped when a notification popped up on your computer. Recognizing the address as your work email, you were quick to hover over it. When you were about to open it to see the full message, your iPad suddenly died.

"Shoot." You looked at Jimin with a straight face. "I forgot to plug it in. Didn't notice the battery."

Jimin grimaced. "Didn't bring any power cable."

"We'll have to do with a phone. Mine died."

You were just about to ask him for his but then you remembered what he said about avoiding Namjoon, hence, his phone was of no use either. 

"We're gonna have to freestyle."

Last year, Mrs. Park's party was held at a theater hall – your first time at one, by the way.

Tonight, it was at their mansion.

You've only ever been to the Park's a total of one time, which was now. Stepping a foot inside here for the first time in your life, the house felt unreal. It was the epitome of money and wealth and everything regal in the world – like a palace of some sort. They had butlers and guards at the gates so maybe that wasn't an exaggeration, but damn, Jimin truly came from money.

Regardless of how shiny the whole building was in both literal and figurative senses though, there was an emptiness to it. It didn't look lived in – which was a fair assumption for a house this big. It definitely did not look like people liked staying here, and maybe that was not a stretch, because as soon as he turned 18, Jimin moved away and lived in his own place ever since. You asked him on your way here and he told you it was his first time this year to visit his own house.

The decoration was sick, though. Granted, they must have surely hired people to do it but at least they'd hired excellent ones. You wouldn't have expected anything less from Jimin's mom.

Jimin and you arrived at 10pm sharp, and thankfully, people were already starting to fill the place up. It was now past 15 minutes to 10pm since you arrived and there really was nothing different that went on from last year; you saw some familiar faces, politicians, and celebrities. Jimin introduced you to some people as his girlfriend, and you got to have quick chats with his model friends.

You knew it didn't actually matter if you thought about it carefully, but there was truly nothing compared to the feeling you get when you see someone in the flesh that you only see on TV all your life. You didn't feel lucky to see them in person, per se, you were just poured over the realization that these people were actually real and they weren't just some sort of simulation to keep the entertainment industry of your country afloat.

Although, you did meet Han Sol – an actress whose works you genuinely admired. Jimin just told you her husband was his second cousin.

It wasn't later that Jimin and you were invited to his family's table, where some of his cousins and immediate family were.

The greetings went pretty normal. Normal as in: Jimin's mom didn't say anything about your weight first thing first. Granted, she didn't try to hide the look of disappointment on her face when she saw you with his son. Probably reeling at the fact that you were still "dating" each other even after a year — she was probably under the impression that it wasn't serious between you two last year. His father, meanwhile, was... quiet. As usual. A man who obviously didn't really say much except ask Jimin about the training program and his siblings' jobs.

Mr. Park didn't really talk to you, just like last year. Like you were almost invisible to him – and you were glad that was the case. He probably didn't like to acknowledge your supposed relationship in the first place. Probably knew that you were working a middle-class job and didn't want to know any further. But at least, he wasn't saying anything. That was nice.

"Where's your cousin?" Asked Jimin's mom suddenly, looking at his son.

"He said he got caught up in traffic. Sent 20 minutes ago." Jimin shrugged. You would ask him about which cousin they were referring to but they had like millions of it at these events so you didn't bother.

Mrs. Park shook her head disapprovingly. "That kid. Always late to the family dinners. Did Junghyun ever teach—"

"Hey,"

Your attention was then focused to the man who just arrived. Black tie, tall... dashing. Jimin was a good-looking individual and his family, as evil as they may be as per his words, were blessed with good genes. If you were to look at the new man that arrived to the table very carefully, you'd say he almost looked familiar.

"Oh, Junghyun!"

Jimin glanced at you and discreetly mouthed, "Cousin."

"Aunt, happy birthday." He said after laughing at Jimin's mother coos. He looked across the table and continued, "Hi, uncle. Jaeyul, Sunghoon, Jimin." They all greeted him back and you could feel the hairs on your nape starting to stand up when his eyes landed on you once again. "And this is...?"

"Oh, that's Jimin's girlfriend, __." Jaeyul, Jimin's brother said.

"Hi." you greeted him, waving a bit.

"Oh?" Junghyun immediately looked at Jimin, eyes not hiding his shock. When you trained your eyes on Jimin, you felt his fake smile. "That's great, man. I didn't know you had a girlfriend. Hi, miss...?"

"It's __." you filled in.

"Nice to meet you, __." He said with a smile. The more you looked at him, the more you could almost pinpoint who he looked like – but that shouldn't really matter.

Junghyun looked over Jimin's parents once again, "Anyway, sorry I'm a bit late, got caught up in traffic."

Jimin cleared his throat.

"How about you, Junghyun? Got a girlfriend yet?" He asked as soon as Junghyun sat on the opposite side of the long table.

You could see Jimin's mother's curiosity peaking at that.

"Tell us, dear. Last time you were dating Kang Iseul, right? The actress. You're still with her?"

Everybody at the table nodded while you almost choked on the smoked quail you were eating. He was dating Kang Iseul? She was a popular actress who announced a hiatus three years ago. That actress Kang Iseul?

Junghyun chuckled and shook his head. "Nah, aunt, that was my brother, and uh, no, I'm not dating anybody currently."

"Oh well. I just wish your brother stops dating that woman. I never really liked that girl. She acts way too self-righteous! I mean, who cut ties with their billionaire father and live independently just so they can say they're self-made? It's ridiculous." Jimin's mother said in that usual snotty tone of hers, and you could not possibly process all of what was going on.

If it wasn't clear to you a moment ago, it was crystal now. Unfortunately, you were a bit chronically online and were there in real time when one random tweet blew up about Kang Iseul being a nepotism baby. But was this guy's brother really dating her? The most important and concerning thing, though, was that: why was Jimin's mom always so annoying about who her family members date? And this was not even her immediate family, mind you.

"Jina," Jimin's father had a warning tone when he called her but Jimin's mom just shrugged him off with a "tsk!"

"Kids are so ungrateful nowadays, don't you think? Anyway, Junghyun dear, you remember the Kang gala I told you about two months ago?" Jimin's mom looked pointedly at Jimin and you bit your lip.

Of course, here comes her passive aggressive disapproval of you. 

"Kang Heesu and her sister Kang Hani will be there. Heesu is a wonderful woman," she chuckled, looking over at Jimin's direction subtly. You had to physically restrain yourself from rolling your eyes. Couldn't she be more obvious about acting as a wingman for Jimin and Heesu? But she continued, just like she always did. "I also heard Kang Hani is going for senior partner at Yoon and Yang, you may be interested. Pretty lady."

Junghyun just awkwardly laughed. "I'll keep that in mind."

Jimiin's father suddenly spoke, making everyone look at him.

"Where is that kid?" He said, authority dripping through his voice. Jimin was obviously not close to his father, and who would be? Mr. Park was way too intimidating. You found it funny to think if he ever did anything remotely paternal towards his children.

"We were supposed to go together but he said he had something to finish. He'll be arriving later." Junghyun said, obviously not oblivious to the "kid" Mr. Park was referring to. You were way too uncaring to actually try to figure that out.

"I see." Jimin's father nodded. "How's Jeon and Min, Junghyun? I heard you were just appointed managing partner last week."

Junghyun responded with a "yes" and they started to talk about the law firm – you assumed – and other people they mutually knew related to the business.

You knew Jimin's complicated family tree was composed of all sorts of professionals, but damn, they had lawyers in here too. It was like out of a career day event at grade schools.

"Is it true Gukka's going to be CEO?" Jimin's mother said, joining the conversation.

You were glad they were doing all the talking. Last year, they talked to you like they were interrogating you and that was not nice.

"Well, dad's not giving up the company so soon. Gukka's going for interim CTO first." Junghyun said with a polite smile.

Gukka. That must be the brother of Junghyun, although it sounded more like a nickname than a real name.

"Your brother's a hard worker. He's looking at a CEO position, some are still at training programs." Jimin's father remarked with a pointed tone.

Oh, fuck me, you thought to yourself. You thought it was gonna take awhile for the comparison to start, but it seemed they were determined to beat their record of one hour from last year.

You tried subtly looking at Jimin to see if he was okay or anything, but you felt him squeezing your wrist under the table. His face was devoid of any emotion as he continued with his own food.

Junghyun, meanwhile, was obviously taken aback by the response and also looked over at Jimin. He was quick to recover, though – probably knew that was a jab at his cousin just like every other person in the room. Atmosphere grew tense, and you had to squirm in your seat a little bit.

"Training programs help a lot, though." Junghyun awkwardly laughed. You were starting to feel bad for him as well.

"Well, you're lawyering. Trainings are important. Mine's kinda stupid." Jimin said which made everybody look at him, including you.

"You're learning anything yet, son?" His father pointedly looked at him.

"We'll see."

Jimin's dismissive tone made you feel the eye roll he would've done after saying that.

Look, he rebelled for the most part of his life so him being passive-aggressive towards his family was not a new thing, but to witness it was both nerve-wracking and honestly... funny. His parents were such assholes so they probably deserved his attitude.

Mrs. Park smiled a fake one before looking at you.

"Well, what about you __ dear? You're a... what was that again? How is that going for you?"

Because you wanted to piss them off, you mirrored her fake smile and said, "I got fired six months ago at my accounting job."

"Pft—" you pinched Jimin's arm at his reaction.

Of course he'd laugh at that. You asked him how you could piss his parents off tonight just to get back at them from last year and he told you to pretend to be unemployed or you work a minimum wage job because that was their biggest ick. Jimin didn't know you were going to come through.

"Oh."

The look on Jimin's mom's face looked as if she heard the most scandalous thing ever, and if his father's frown was deep even before the dinner started, his face was now below the ground. It felt satisfying to get those looks on their faces. Good! They were such assholes. Imagine getting devastated at someone being unemployed? Okay – for the record, being unemployed was devastating but these people weren't sympathizing with that, they found it humiliating in an elitist way– criminal almost. 

You nodded, your lips almost getting tired from stretching them too far.

"Yeah. Anyway, I started working at a local burger joint. You should visit us sometime."

"I'm vegan." Jimin's mom said, her face now drained with the fake joy she's worn all night.

"We have vegan options." you quipped. Jimin once again made a sound beside you, hiding his laughter.

"Wait, really? They offer vegan options at a street burger joint?" Sunghoon, the youngest of the Park brothers, asked.

You almost laughed at the genuine curiosity in his voice. He was still in high school and from what Jimin told you, he was a nice kid. He wasn't very close to any of his brothers, though.

"Nah, it's the only one in town." You bullshit one more time, drinking the wine beside you. "Sorry, can I excuse myself for a minute?"

They nodded and you stood up, heading to the bathroom, brisking once you got out of their sight to get there more quickly.

It was now 10:30 pm – meaning, you had to do something to get Jimin out of here now if he wanted to be on time at the airport to send off Namjoon.

Once you got inside, you looked at yourself in the mirror and sighed. 

This whole thing was sucking the shit out of your soul, but you needed to get through it.

It took you awhile to finish your pep talk in the bathroom.

If only you could've have locked yourself in there to avoid socializing with anybody, you willingly would. But you were running out of time and unfortunately, you had something to do and that was to fake some illness to get both Jimin and you out of here.

When you got out to approach the family's table one more time, you suddenly stopped in your tracks.

The table was at least fifteen meters away from where you stood, but you could clearly see the side in which Jimin's cousin, Junghyun, sat, facing your direction. He wasn't the issue – no, far from it. It was the guy beside him who wore the same set of black tie as him; the face attached to the body who wore it though, was someone you did not expect to see.

Why the fuck was Jungkook, Unit 446, here?!

From where you were, you could see him engaging with Junghyun and Jimin's parents. You couldn't hear them, of course, but it was clear that they were acquainted – close – even from afar.

Why did he look so comfortable with the Parks? Why was he at the family table laughing and conversing with everybody, including Jimin? Why did he seem like he went to many of these, like this was just another Thursday for him?

There was a waiter who walked past you and you were grateful for it because had it not been the case, people would start to get weirded out about you standing on the same place longer than necessary, looking stoned. That was also an opportunity to run away from the situation without Jungkook possibly seeing and recognizing you.

"I'll take this," You told the waiter and grabbed the glass of champagne and quickly turned on your heels, heading to the opposite side of the family table where the Parks, and apparently, Jungkook were.

You found yourself heading to the bathroom again, your feet seemingly developing a mind of its own as it led you there unconsciously. You knew you'd be in trouble if they found out about you putting the champagne glass in the sink, but you needed to get inside the toilet and think over everything that was happening tonight.

What the fuck. What the fuck!  Again, why the hell was Jungkook here?

As far as you knew, he was just a regular man that happened to be living across from you. He was just supposed to be some guy you were regularly hanging out with nowadays. Your friend. Your crush – whatever! What he wasn't supposed to be is be here at your best friend's mother's birthday party and hanging out with his family!

Your phone dinged, a message notification from Jimin welcoming you.

cuntress #1 [10:32pm]: girl what happened I saw u going back to the bathroom?

You didn't know why it was suddenly too hot, but you felt the balls of sweat starting to form on the side of your forehead.

You [10:33pm]: im going with the diarrhea excuse

cuntress #1 [10:33pm]: tbh idc atp I just wanna go to joon 😔

"Shit!"

Right! Joon. Namjoon. Jimin needed to go to Nmajoon as soon as possible.

cuntress #1 [10:33pm]: also another cousin has arrived u rmr jeon jungkook he's junghyun's brother cuntress #1 [10:33pm]: love this guy but moms starting to compare me to him and I need out right NEOW im justt aking hits after hits jesusssssss

You could just feel the blood draining from your face as soon as you read Jungkook's name in the text.

Jeon Jungkook. Jungkook. Gukka. Kook-a.

That was why the Junghyun guy looked familiar. Because he had the same coloring of Jeon Jungkook. Because they were goddamn siblings.

You started to replay some memories in your head, trying to figure out if you've ever heard Jungkook talk about his family in one of your conversations. But as far as you remembered, he never did. All you knew about him was that he was from the States, and he only got here because of work and he had a dog and as far as you were concerned, his cousin was definitely not Park fucking Jimin, your best friend.

Pacing around the confined space of the toilet, you tried to wrack your brain if you've ever mentioned Jimin to him and in the event that you did, why he never told you that he was his cousin – but you came up blank. Blank because you never told him about your best friend's name... and in turn, Jimin didn't know what Mr. 446's name was, either. They were both genuinely oblivious about the whole thing and couldn't have made you a fool in the situation.

In short, you were the one who was stupid as hell for not connecting the dots sooner.

"Hey, you just landed?"

If it was a private conversation Jimin would've left the room but since he didn't, you decided to stay in bed, kind of listening in to the conversation, but also not, as you turned the volume down of the show you were watching earlier on your laptop.

"Nah, you want me to pick you up?" Jimin sat up on the edge of the bed and you looked at him curiously. "Sure, I'm free, Kook. You have a place to stay? Hotel suite or something?" He nodded to whatever the other person was saying on the other line. "Oh, you're here for three months? Thought you were just flying in for mom's birthday?"

It was moments after they said goodbye that Jimin turned to you to ask, "Well, my cousin's apparently staying here for three months. Got this job thing going on."

"Fuck me." You hissed, remembering that time when Jimin told you about his cousin staying here for three months because of work.

cuntress #1 [10:35pm]: its either ur taking a guinness world record breaker piss there or u really do have diarrhea now and ur shitting cuntress #1 [10:36pm]: anyway get this, jungkook's gonna be interim cto at your company did u know that??????????????????

You almost dropped your phone upon reading the last message.

What the hell did he mean by that?

Heart beating fast as if it wanted to break out of your own ribcage, you closed your eyes and read Jimin's message once again. There was no way he would be shitting you about any of this. He knew where you worked at and you knew your current company was his uncle's, and now that you knew Jungkook was his cousin...

Shit. Was this what they were talking about at the table earlier? About Junghyun saying his brother was gonna be interim CTO? Did he mean Jeon Jungkook all along? Your freaking neighbor?

Suddenly, you remembered the email you received that afternoon that you never bothered to check again because you simply forgot about it. Who even actually checks their work email? Literally no one. You spend your weeks facing your computer while email flew in like porn ads on a shady website, you weren't about to willingly go to the app and check it on your leisure time.

But maybe you should have.

Fingers involuntarily shaking in their wake as you switched to your work email on your phone, you clicked on the recent unread message that was on top from the HR department.

Subject: Invitation to Ceremony: Announcement of Interim CTO Dear Blue Nexus Inc. employee, We hope this email finds you well. We would like to inform you that a ceremony has been scheduled on July 29, 2028, 10:00 am at the AVR Hall 5, 12th floor. The purpose of this meeting is to announce the appointment of our interim Chief Technology Officer (CTO), Mr. Jeon Jungkook. As you may be aware, our previous CTO, Mr. Shin Juman, is currently on medical leave recovering from a stroke. While he is recuperating and undergoing treatment, it has become necessary for us to appoint an interim CTO  for an indefinite period of time to ensure the continuity and effectiveness of our operations. Your presence at this ceremony is highly valued as we introduce the new leadership to the team and outline our strategic direction moving forward. Light refreshments will be served. Thank you for your attention to this matter. We look forward to seeing you at the ceremony. Best regards, HR Department

You knew that feeling when you were just taking hits and hits? This was it.

So not only was Jeon Jungkook Jimin's cousin, he was also gonna be the interim CTO of the company you were currently working at. He was technically going to be your boss, and you would be both working in the same place all the while living across each other where he would see you taking out your trash every Sunday morning in your worn-out highschool PE shirt and pants. He was going to be your boss working at the company you complained to him about on the nights you walked together to your shared apartment complex.

You flirted with Jungkook. You flirted with the guy who was the son of the owner of your whole company building – and not only that, he was your best friend's cousin, to add salt to injury.

You [10:38pm]: jimin we need to get out of here

cuntress #1 [10:38pm]: ive been saying

You [10:38pm]: but i cant go out there again. Just tell them i had a problem in the bathroom??

cuntress #1 [10:38pm]: ok on it  cuntress #1 [10:38pm]: im kind of convinced u shitted in there tho????????

You rolled your eyes, but at the same time found an opportunity in that. Jimin can't know the truth.

You [10:39pm]: u cant judge me for having a very human experience fuck u the cake i ate earlier was giving cake boss

cuntress #1 [10:39pm]: KJAHFKGSIDFHDSHASFHSKJBF

You [10:39pm]: im literally doing this for u and joon

cuntress #1 [10:39pm]: IKNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!thanks to ur stomach problems cuntress #1 [10:39pm]: im going there

You [10:40pm]: make sure they don't see us again to really sell the whole im-embarassed-thing

cuntress #1 [10:40pm]: ON IT! Were going out the back door I don't think they'll notice

You couldn't even find it in you to laugh a little bit at your silly exchange and scheme, because you were way too stressed about what you just found out.

You let out a controlled, heavy breath, leaning your back on the door and shut your eyes aggressively.

"What the hell am I gonna do after this?"

PART TWO | ....

all right reserved © awrkive, 2024. no reposts, modification, and copying allowed. if you enjoy my work/s and have the extra means, please consider supporting me on ko-fi <3

[junicult]

!! showering w the bachelors for the first time

contains ; mostly fluff. fem!farmer. some suggestive parts. making out. newly established relationships. nsfw in sebastian’s, implied in shane’s & alex’s. afab!farmer. brief mention of fingering. not proofread, will later.

note ; i intended for this to be entirely sfw i swear

harvey.

- the honeymoon phase.

- where he doesn’t even live with you, yet he’s at your house nearly every night, or sometimes vise versa.

- when he uses your stove (with permission) to make you both dinner to share after you’ve finished work.

- where you’re still so in love all you wanna do is gaze into each others eyes and kiss until you can’t breathe.

- that’s exactly what kind of phase you’re in.

- and it’s been a long time since he’s been in that phase.

- you sorta have a whole routine atp.

- whenever he comes over, you make it a plan to wrap up work quickly & spend the evening with him,

- which is why you felt so guilty when you lost track of time, backpack full of rocks and geodes you couldn’t wait for clint to break open the next morning.

- when you glanced down at your watch, you nearly jumped ten feet in the air like a cartoon lmfao

- and you’ll definitely regret running up the ladder one level before you reached another button on the elevator—but right now, you weren’t even focused on that.

- by the time you made it back to your house, a mere two hours after you told harvey you’d be back, it was pitch-black outside.

- thankfully, he didn’t leave. instead, he stood scrubbing the dishes clean, before whipping around at the sudden swing of your front door.

- “harvey! i’m so sorry, i lost track of ti—“

- “oh thank yoba you’re okay,” he sighs, (u already know he wanted to call someone to check up on u but he didn’t want to seem controlling😭😭)

- and he didn’t waste a second to meet you at the door, scanning you just to see if you were injured.

- “i’m fine, i’m fine, just got way too distracted. did you make dinner? did you have to eat alone?? oh, i’m so so sorry i didn’t mean to—“

- ur word vomit is making him fall in love with you even more. two peas in a pod🫶🫶

- then it’s just back and forth of you constantly questioning and reassuring each other for a few moments.

- “but you made such a nice meal for me, and i kept you waiting, i just—i’m so sorry—“

- “sweetheart, it’s okay, i’m not mad,” he almost chuckles, holding you close.

- as soon as he established you’re not hurt or injured, he’s no longer stressed.

- he understands what it’s like getting carried away at work, so who is he to ever be mad at you for that?

- after you ate and assured him you were fine, that’s when you mentioned it.

- “i’m pretty dirty from the mines, i was gonna shower. make up for lost time with me?”

- his mind doesn’t inherently go to sexual things.

- honestly, he was just excited you wanted to.

- he also doesn’t give a fuck that he took a shower earlier. he just wants to spend time with you lol.

- although ik he’s all organized and has like a little routine where you both keep taking turns under the spray LMFAO

- like you get in first, rinse yourself off, then switch with him while you soap yourself up, switch & rinse, switch and apply shampoo, switch, etc, you get it.

- it’s so fucking funny LMAO.

- but the entire time you’re making casual conversation, some little comments about how much you missed each other, things like that.

- he loves how you look in the shower. not even bc ur naked, it’s just a vulnerable way to see the person you love, and there’s nothing sexual in the way he’s looking at you.

- even when you tug on his neck to pull him down for a kiss, he’s just swooning over your affections.

- unless the implication, or intention of sex came before the shower…he’s probably not approaching anything with that.

- it’s a completely different story if you’ve had a ton of tension all day,

- constantly making passing remarks that make his palms sweat, but unable to go any further because of your busy day,

- and you leave him all hot and bothered until you come home in the evening, and ask him to join you in the shower.

- that’s when he forgets all about the little routine.

sam.

- ah, the start to ur most important routine.

- honestly, i feel like you were the one who started it all.

- the whole, “every time you shower, we shower together” thing.

- at least, that’s what it becomes once you move in together. but before that, anytime he was over & you needed to shower, he’d totally join in.

- it’s not even sexual. there’s only like a 30% chance you’ll end up having sex, or even just do foreplay whenever you shower together.

- he’s just so clingy, and he craves the closeness after he realized how much he enjoyed you being there the first time.

- you both were quietly laying together, watching the tv wordlessly, just enjoying each others company after you two decided he should spend the night.

- which then prompted in him asking, “do you think i could use the shower? i smell bad.” he frowns after taking a whiff of his arm.

- you giggle. “i think you smell good, but go ahead. i don’t have your soap, though.”

- like he could care lmfao.

- “thanks!” he just grins, hopping on his feet and giving you a little kiss on the forehead before he skips off.

- you give it like 5 minutes before you decide u miss him too much (attachment issues😞)

- “sam…y’think you got room for two in there?” you knock before creeping the door open.

- he peeks his shampoo’d head from behind the shower curtain. “you wanna come in?”

- “is that okay?”

- u might’ve just asked him to marry you.

- his whole face lights up, grinning wide and opening the curtain wider as he steps to the side. “the more the merrier!”

- he doesn’t even care ur naked. there’s nothing sexual running through his mind, he’s just excited you’re standing with him rn. now he doesn’t have to rush to go see you.

- he even steps to the side to give you the chance to soak your hair under the spray.

- it’s easily just a little awkward at first.

- you’ve had sex before, that’s not why it’s awkward,

- only because it’s the first time you two are seeing each other completely naked without any intention of sexual advancement. not that it would be such a burden if you did, but neither of you want to.

- while you drench your hair, he can’t help but smile lovingly at the sight of water droplets all over your skin.

- he could easily be thinking about how much fun it’d be to have sex right here, but he’s too focused on how this might actually be his favorite thing you’ve ever done together.

- like minutes of silence pass, nothing but the water running and he’ll just lean in and press a kiss on your temple or shoulder.

- it’s not bc he’s trying to hint at something,

- he just wanted to do it, and he doesn’t really overthink the things he wants to do.

- but the affection makes you smile, and by how pure it was, it doesn’t send any false messages.

- it really doesn’t last that long. probably about 15 minutes of you both washing off and short displays of affection.

- yet it clung to you both so well, that it just became the routine you never skipped out on.

shane.

- it definitely just happened naturally.

- ur relationship at first was strictly sexual.

- to the rest of the town, no one even knew you guys even spoke. which, to be fair, there wasn’t much talking between u two anyways💀💀

- but i wanna say that was only for a couple weeks.

- it was still super slow and progressive. your conversations went from short & passing, to getting to know each other a little more. but the sex was still there.

- it went from instead of him leaving right after you finished, you’d stay up and talk for a couple hours.

- to waking up together, to spending the day together, etc etc.

- now ur relationship was approaching friends w benefits category. except it was unspoken, but neither of you wanted to be friends at this point.

- despite all of this, you’ve still never showered together.

- until you spent the whole day working outside. you feel gross, sticky, and sweaty. he just so happened to stick around after you started working.

- ur checking in on your animals he just follows you lol.

- before u both knew it, the sun was coming down and he spent the whole day helping you.

- the thing was, neither of you wanted to mention it. you were both nervous even bringing it up would spark the implication of wanting him to leave.

- which was not the case.

- not to mention, he’s a huge help. when u passed him ur axe to chop down trees, you almost couldn’t look away 🤷‍♀️

- so after you’ve finished, sun starting to set and sweat dripping from your temples—he’s still standing with you.

- “i feel gross, i’m gonna shower.” you frown, plucking your clothes away from your sticky skin.

- ofc he’s thinking it.

- but he doesn’t have time to make a sly comment before you shoot one over your shoulder, “there’s room for two, y’know.”

- say no more, he’s following close behind you throwing off his shirt.

- “thought you said there was room for two, there’s hardly room for one.” he snorts, squeezing himself beside you in the cramped space.

- “oh c’mon, you’ve never had a problem with making it fit.”

- he’s gonna lose his mind.

- u don’t really waste any time LMFAO

- drenching your hair under the spray before you look over at him,

- and you both just lean in cus it’s unspoken, but obvious you guys aren’t in there just to shower.

- he’s quick to slotting his hands at the small of your back, while you wrap yours around his neck and press yourself against him.

- …not much showering gets done, i’ll just say that.

sebastian.

- i feel like sebastian spends more nights at your house then he does at his own at this point.

- he’s not the type to get super attached very easily, even getting to the step of sleeping together took a while.

- but after it happened, he found your little cottage so comfortable. he liked waking up to you in the morning, and falling asleep in your arms at night.

- the only reason he goes home is to work.

- and the minute he finishes up, he heads back over.

- honestly, if he could pack up his computer and leave it at your house, then he’d never leave—which is probably why you made it clear he can’t do that.

- your relationship is already committed.

- i don’t really think he’d wanna sleep with you if hadn’t discussed a romantic relationship.

- anyways, i feel like bc of this, he’s already showered at your place lol.

- you were too busy to ask, and he knew you wouldn’t mind, so he just jumped in and took a quick shower.

- hours after you already started your chores for the day, he woke up & just sniffed his shirt and winced a little.

- he also did some laundry (for your sake).

- so then it kinda just became a, “hey, do you mind if i take a quick shower?” while you were preoccupied.

- sometimes you’d be the one to ask. like if you were lying together, on your bed in your house, you’d turn to him and say the same thing.

- it never rly occurred to either of u that you could knock out two birds with one stone🤷‍♀️

- one evening you were exhausted. you smelled horrible, you could already tell. you had spent nearly the entire day down in the mines, just covered in dirt and rubble, stinking like sweat yet he still kissed you when you came in.

- “i need to shower,” you groan, still accepting his kiss.

- ugh but he’s already spent the majority of the day without you, why are you going to deprive him of more?

- “i think you smell fine,” he tries his best to persuade, but you won’t budge.

- pressing against his chest, you giggle, “you know that’s not true. i’ll only be a few minutes, promise.”

- he’s honestly so clingy, literally tugging on your arm as you try to walk away and following behind you like a lost puppy.

- and suddenly, “i could use a shower too…” despite him using it earlier.

- you look at him for a second, narrowing your eyes, before you tease, “yeah, you could.”

- he’s much like sam, just less openly enthusiastic.

- when you tell him to get the water running, he’s only nodding, but it’s not hard to miss the way he’s turning to start the water so quick.

- and how he’s undressing like he has somewhere to be, despite presenting so nonchalant about it.

- for him, it’s just a better reason to be so close to you. he likes when you’re around.

- it really depends on how much he was missing you, but for the most part i don’t think it ever leads to anything sexual.

- sure, he stands back to let you rinse yourself off and his eyes wander, but that’s about as much that’ll happen if neither of you are in the mood.

- and even then, if you end up wanting to have sex, it hardly ever happens in the shower. most is just foreplay.

- which he is never opposed to.

- i’ve said it once, i’ll say it a million more times,

- he lovesss fingering you.

- and lowkey, if you’re intending on having sex and starting with foreplay in the shower…phew.

- gently pressing you against the shower wall, the water running all down his back but he doesn’t even care,

- and his lips are making out with yours, which are sloppy in response while his fingers press against that spot inside of you that has your neck craning and moans spilling…

- that’s what he wants when he’s been missing you and joins you in the shower.

alex.

- i actually think he’s similar to sam too.

- he’s a huge fan of showering together.

- for starters, he’s the kind of man who makes himself at home very quickly💀💀

- even when you guys weren’t even dating yet, still just in that getting to know each other and hanging out regularly phase.

- when you’d plan for him to come over once you finished up work and spend time w each other casually.

- the cocky side of him just took your hospitality as flirting.

- which, i mean, isn’t unbelievably far off. you do like him.

- but it was probably like his second time over at your house, and he just casually asked if he could take a shower.

- you might’ve raised an eyebrow, but you still said sure.

- so then it became a pretty normal thing. he never took longer then 10 minutes, so you could appreciate that.

- after you both started dating, and had seen each other naked, it became much more casual.

- the transition between not showering together, to showering together was so subtle.

- it just started with you showering, and he needed to pee so he’d just come in and, well, pee.

- then he’d be showering but you still needed to brush your teeth and do your skincare, so you hung out in the bathroom.

- and pretty soon it was so normal that when you asked if he wanted to join you one evening—you didn’t even think much of it.

- it wasn’t until you were midway through washing your body when you realized he was doing the same thing beside you.

- it was just like a, ‘oh, okay, this is normal now’ kind of realization.

- “can you pass me the shampoo?” like he was asking for the salt at the dinner table.

- it just felt natural, especially after he moved in.

- it became a thing you both do together.

- literally a part of your nightly routine. when you were ready to shower, you’d let him know and he’d start the water while you got undressed.

- so since it was your nightly routine, i feel like the longer you’re together, showering together and having sex doesn’t really pair up.

- you shower 9/10 times together. there’s no way you’d be able to keep up (he can tho lol)

- but that doesn’t mean it’s rare.

- he loves looking at you when you’re naked. no shame.

- there could be zero sexual energy between you two at the moment, and he’s still looking you up and down, admiring.

- he can’t help it! he doesn’t even have to be turned on for his body to react to yours.

- “are you hard right now?” you laugh almost like you’re making fun of him.

- and his response will always be, “well duh,” because you just have that affect on him.

elliott.

- another man that loves to shower with you.

- well…yes he likes to shower together, but he’s definitely a bigger fan of bathing together.

- i’ll get to that in a minute.

- your relationship progressed very steadily. it wasn’t until after a few dates when you actually slept together.

- once you had sex though, i feel like it opened you up into being much more comfortable around each other.

- spending time constantly, always inviting him over, allowing him to see you in more vulnerable ways like in your pj’s or all dirty.

- he approached the idea first, i feel like.

- you’ve been having a stressful week, working nearly every hour you were awake, and you had complained about it prior.

- so he just wanted to help you relax, setting up a nice bath with candles and bath salts and anything to help you relax.

- he’s so sweet about it too, not even intending on joining you until you clasped your hands together and asked him to.

- “join me, please. i’ve hardly seen you all week.”

- and he’s all ears.

- sitting in the opposite end, either sitting in peaceful silence or listening to you recap your day.

- i lowkey think he’d bathe you LMFAO

- like hear me out, he’s offering to wash your hair and he’s all delicate with it, giving you a whole head massage and dipping a cup of water to rinse it out.

- kissing your neck and shoulders, pampering you while you don’t even care to protest.

- and even if you did, he wouldn’t allow it. not when you’re all he wants to focus on right now.

- and despite him loving to bathe with you, i feel like his shower routine is so intensive and meticulous that it’s not often you shower together.

- he never minds your company, i promise you that.

- i just firmly believe he’s a morning showerer and you don’t really have the time for that in the morning.

- if you were to ask for him to join you, i don’t think he’d turn you down. he’d just stand away from the spray and tie his hair back so it doesn’t get wet LOL

- but he’s all for spending as much time as he can get with you.

[cherievol6]

in love in italy

hey!!! long time no see…sorry i’ve been off the grid - i’ve been working loads. i just randomly wrote this (I was feeling very poetic after reading Sally Rooney lmfao) hope you enjoy!

being with harry in Italy brings on some intense feelings that you just need to confess.

warnings: very brief mentions of sex, other than that it’s absolutely heart wrenching fluff.

word count: ~1k

.

You’ve never felt like this before.

At least, not when you're in the middle of having sex with someone.

This wasn't just someone though, it was Harry.

Sweet and gentle Harry, whom had made everything feel a little bit lighter for you since the moment you met. Here he was, skin so close to yours it felt like he was trying to meld you both together like clay. His head was dipped into your shoulder, his breaths heaving but blissful. You felt like a pot of boiling sugar bubbling up to a gooey caramel and oozing into the bed below you. He made you feel as though one look from him or one kiss from him would make you shed every negative piece of your mind.

"You okay? You're awfully quiet after that." He half laughs, referring to the intense scene of love that was just displayed in the early hours of the morning, in a random villa in Italy. You’d woken up to get a glass of water and returned to bed to find Harry awake. A quick good night kiss turned into wandering hands and clothes being stripped to the floor. It wasn't quick, or impatient, the way you'd held eachother. It was intense, and thick and heavy — like there was something lingering for the two of you. You feel a few tears slip to yours ears and on to the pillows. Harry still hasn't noticed, gently stroking the leg around his waist. You scratch your fingers in his hair and let out a shaky breath.

You always found it hard to hold in your cries, since you were small. They swelled your chest like a balloon, and with a sharp gasp of breath the balloon pops and Harry's snapping his head up quickly and brushing your hair out of your face.

"Woah, woah. What's wrong?" His voice is panicked and you don't find yourself trying to avoid his gaze, which is strange. You don't feel upset, you feel overwhelmed. Harry always said it scared him how every time you looked at him it felt like you were reading his mind.

You wipe the sweat from your brow, the warm room making you feel flushed. Or was it this nagging urge to tell Harry something you’d kept to yourself for so long, out of fear of scaring him off so early in your relationship.

You smile, and he must think you look manic, grin growing the more you look at him, his constant over concern for you, like he couldn’t bear to think of anything bad happening to you.

“I feel good.” You say quietly, running your thumb over his mole next to his mouth.

“Yeah? That’s good.” He kisses you softly.

“Do you feel good?” He nods at your question without hesitation.

His eyes seem to gloss over akin to yours, and the words are literally behind your teeth when he says, “Always when I’m with you. You make me feel so safe. I can’t describe it-”

“I love you so much, Harry.” The tears are no longer tears, rather streams of saltiness that saturate your hair and Harry’s hands. He seems to deposit the last of the air in his lungs before he can speak again. Like your words winded him.

“You love me?” His voice is timid, and his hand is now shaking.

“You know that thing, where people paint in acrylic on a canvas, and it looks good, but kind of dull? A bit moody?” Harry nods, with a small smile creeping up his face. You always were one for the metaphor, “and then they paint it with that shimmery gloss and it makes the painting look so different. Like it’s brand new, and you’re finally seeing it in its best form? That’s how you make me feel. I wasn’t bad before, I just needed something…or someone to make me more vibrant. You do that for me. And I love you for it.”

He laughs, and the movement makes his tears fall out of his eyes and on to your cheeks. You are the most emotionally intelligent person he’s ever met in his life and he can’t believe that you’re in love with him.

“You always come up with the most beautiful metaphors...” he kisses you again, like staring at your face for too long brings on the urge to just devour you whole. “I genuinely think my entire life was created to coexist with yours, and just hear every piece of your mind that you’ll let me.”

You pull him down again and kiss him again. You were insatiable for his kisses, they were like oxygen for you. He’s still crying, and you’re still crying, and all you can hear around you is his heavy heartbeat and the owls in the trees around you. Your favourite place to be with Harry was in his Italian house. It felt like no one in the world existed or cared about the two of you when you were within these walls.

“I love you. I have done for months and I will do for a lifetime. Okay?” His brows are pinched together, in a sincere and reassuring way. Like he needs you to know that he’s not going anywhere.

“Okay.” You smile widely, until your cheeks hurt and your eyes wrinkle. “I love you.”

“I love you.” Now that it’s out in the air it feels like the only form of communication between you both in this moment. Harry rocks against your hips and kisses your neck, and you begin to breathe shallow. You whine when he connects your lips again.

“Show me how much you love me, H.”

.

[elliezlils11utt]

Heyy, love your writing! <3 I'm not sure if you've written about this before, but can I request needy and whiny Ellie accidentally discovering she has a mommy kink? (during sex she it just slips) and reader teasing her about it, poor baby :( I just know Ellie started calling her gf mommy, mama or mami as a joke...until it wasn't a joke anymore 😌

A/N: first of all, thank you so much😭💕 and omg yes? this is goals. I have never written whiney ellie b4 so let’s see how this goes lmfao. (sorry if this kinds sucks ass😔)

summary: the ask in a nutshell.

parings: whinysub!ellie & dom!reader

W/C : around 600

content warning: (NSFW !!) degrading praise? (“pretty slut, sweetheart, baby”) ellie calls reader mommy ovi.

els: mamaaaa, wya?

els: i miss youuuu

Y/n: mama huh?

els: yah it’s my new nickname 4 u.

y/n: alr els😭

y/n: I’ll be there soon baby dw. you can wait a little longer for mama, yeah?

els: BDJSNDJSHDBSBH?!

y/n: see u soon baby.

your pretty sure that’s when you found out Ellie had a mommy kink. her reaction totally gave it away. so when she called you mommy in bed you played along.

you had her dicked down on the bed. holding her thighs over your shoulders while she gripped onto the sheets on her back. your cock pounded into Ellie while your hand roamed her body.

“awah, is my baby crying?? feels so good, don’t it sweetheart?” you coo mocking your cock drunk girlfriend under you. she looks so needy like this. her eyes rolled back into her skull, fluttering open every once and a while to watch you split her open on your cock. her auburn hair sticks to her forehead, sticky with sweat. she would whimper incoherent please. she wasn’t even sure what she was asking for. she just wanted more. and she was all for you.

“y-yess. please. faster mommy !!” the name caught you off guard. stoping your unforgiving thrusts into her. you smirk, bending over to kiss her sweaty forehead.

“call me that again.” you growl into her neck when you continue to slam into ellies pretty little cunt. your arm reaches around her leg and you play with her puffy clit. rubbing tight circles around her pussy. or as tight as you could get them while the bass of the strap was rubbing against your clit so deliciously. you pound into her pussy harder. hitting a deeper spot then before. Ellie groans, her mouth falling agap at the new angle. her perky tits jiggle with every thrust.

“did you not, fuck, did you not fucking hear me? I said call me that again, or I stop.” your merciless pace made her head foggy. barely comprehending what you were saying. poor baby:( you slow your thrusts, bottoming out in ellie. you just sit there inside of her till she notices the stop. She catches her breath. huffing in between whines.

“w-why’d you stop?” she try’s to slide herself father into your dick, rutting her hips closer to yours.

“need you to call me mommy again, baby.”

“mommy please, please let me cum.”

and at her word your pace regains speed.

“y’like calling me mommy. isn’t that right my pretty slut? you like when mommy fucks you shitless?” she nods her head aimlessly and you swear you see drool pouring from the side of her mouth when you start to rub her clit again. her whines reverbing off the walls, sounding like music to your ears.

“yeah I know you do, been wanting to call me mommy for a while now haven’t you sweetheart?” your words tip her over the edge as she cums all over your dick. you fuck her through her orgasm, drawing long whines from her pretty little lips. normally she would scream your name while she cums, but today she called you something different.

“mommy- fuck, mo-mommyyyy” she chanted that name so damn much it ain’t even seem like a word anymore. eventually your thrusts slows down as she shakes underneath you.

“I’m goin pull out now, okay baby?” her fucked out little expression can’t form words as she gives a weak thumbs up. cute loserrr.

A/N: I wrote this super quick but it was fun! I’m trying to have more fun when writing bc I used to think of it as something I needed to be perfect at but that wasn’t getting me no where lmfao. SEND ME ASSKKKKS !! love yall 🩷

[kurusick]

Can you please write a smug where Mike takes the readers virginity

♡ was i good?

NSFW!mike schmidt x reader

tags- SMUT/NSFW!!, loss of virginity, mike helps you through it, whimpering and moaning.., riding, neck kisses.., a bit of fluff at the end, MIKE GETS TO CREAM TOO!!!!!!! 😡

an: i am sitting like an evil villain this is a wonderful idea thank you… on another note count how many times i said cock in this lmfao😭

★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆

★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆

you had known mike for a while now, moving in next door a few months ago. you walked over and gave him cookies, meeting his little sister and instantly connecting. you started coming over every night, watching abby, cooking dinner, and tidying the house while he was away. you were his personal house wife. he liked that; almost as much as he liked you.

mike had dropped abby off at school, and you had come by to pick up one of the dishes you had used to bring over dinner. you walked in, giving a quick “hey” as you walked to the kitchen. mikes eyes followed you. you were wearing shorts and a tank. you rummaged through the kitchen, bending over in the dishwasher to look for your container. mike was floored. he had never seen you like this, usually wearing jeans and a t shirt. but shorts ? he could clearly see the outline of your pussy. he rested a hand on his mouth, having a mental battle in his head.

“mike i can’t find the dish…” you called, half embarrassed. you swore you had put it in the dishwasher before you left, but it was no where to be found. mike emerged in the kitchen, his hands resting on his crotch. you paid no mind.

you turned to mike, asking a simple “where is it” to which he replied “oven.” you nodded opening the oven door, bending down in-front of him to finally grab the pan. you heard mike audibly sigh, you turned and stood, confused. he was biting his lip and his hand were now gripping his crotch. your eyes grew wide.

“mike-“ you were cut off “i’m sorry i just, those shorts and that shirt- i mean tank, whatever it is it’s just-“ he sighed, half expecting you to yell at him. you did the exact opposite. “i mean.. i could, try? and.. help.” mike blinked in shock. you walked closer to him, moving his hands from his cock and placing one of your own, the other resting on his shoulder. “i.. haven’t done this before.” you blabbed, trying to tear off the bandaid. you were never one to be interested in sex… but sex with mike ? jesus you would cross the ocean to have sex with him.

“i can.. guide you” he whispered, placing his hands on your hips. you nodded and he led you his room, pulling off his pants. you did the same. he sat on the bed, patting his lap. he was rock hard. you climbed ontop of him, knees resting on either side of his thighs. mike took his cock in his hand, lining it up with ur entrance.

“tell me if it hurts, okay?” you nodded, slowly lowering yourself onto him. you felt his tip press against your hole and ur mind half blanked. he wasn’t even inside and it already felt amazing. you lowered yourself more, until the entire head was in. you were panting, half drooling. mike felt so good in you.

“f-fuckk you’re tight.” his breath hitched as you lowered yourself more, his girth stretching you out. you felt so full and he wasn’t even fully inside. mike couldn’t hold on any longer and bucked into you, letting his full length finally be sheathed inside your pussy. you moaned, grabbing his shoulders as your pussy pulsed around him. he was stretching out your cunt so good.

“you ok?” he whispered in ur ear, rubbing circles into your back. you nodded, and mike slowly started to fuck you. his hands were on ur hips, bouncing you up and down. it was slow, but god it felt amazing.

mikes head was burrowed in ur neck, kissing and nipping at any skin his mouth could latch onto. all you could do was whine as mike had his way with you.

“god.. so pretty on my cock.. can’t believe i get to have you first..” you moaned. mike was making you feel so good it was almost unbearable. everything was so hot and the way he was stretching you out made you want to scream. mike removed one of his hands from your hips, placing his thumb on your clit to rub circles. you saw stars. “m-mike..” you whined, feeling your release. mike sucked your neck and replied with a hum, fucking into you faster. your pussy clenched around him and you came, hard.

mike fucked you through it, and your body was starting to feel like jelly. “just a little more okay? just- so close baby… i’m so fucking close” mike mumbled into your neck, whimpering. his thrusts became sloppy as he spewed into your sopping cunt, painting your walls white. you let out a broken moan, feeling his hot seed inside you. you felt so full of him.

you were both panting. mike had pulled back from your neck, looking you in the eye. your stomach felt fuzzy. he still managed to be so cute even when he’d just fucked you.

you smiled, leaning in for a quick kiss, pulling away and breaking the silence.

“was i good?”

★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆

[funtheysaid]

IWTV 2x02 Initial Thoughts (Stream Of Consciousness)

- ooh the title card changed! I’ve been wanting to see the Eiffel Tower as a “fang” since season two was announced. WE IN PARIS BABY!

- ayooo three-way (interview) incoming

- Daniel’s “Paris sucks” aka “Paris is where my ex-bf is from and he sucks (dick), but not mine anymore, and no, I’m not bitter abt that, his city just fucking stinks (literally)”

- not two minutes in and Devil’s Minion is already flirting bickering

- ALICE MENTION alice!armand truthers are gon love that shit i just know

- “I’ll tell you what a woman is” That’s my sapphic-coded queen!!! 🕯️ pls S2 give me claudeleine 🕯️

- “Gauche” well, yes.

- Loumand: 🥰🥰 Daniel: 🙄 he‘s so second-hand embarrassed for them I can’t

- I mean, it’s crazy. What? We finish each other’s- I WAS WITH HIM FOR LONGER THAN LESTAT WAS WITH HIM WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN DANIEL PUT IT ON RECORD WEVE BEEN FUCKING FOR LIKE DOUBLE THE TIME …that’s what i…was….gonna say?

- Louis would be that faux-intellectual hipster who has his own darkroom full of overexposed and blurry, unfocused photos that are his “art” bc he took them on film (affectionate)

- Not claudia calling him out on it in the next scene “let me think I’m deeper than I am” okay honey you do you

- “She’s miserable but she doesn’t want to fuck with your too delusional left bank dilettante vibes” ahh the narrative foils are foiling, I see

- The show: Alice was pregnant, My dumb ass: OMEGAVERSE DEVILS MINION !?!?

- “joyfully joyless” MOOD.

- Claudia looking at Madeleine like “I don’t know if I want to be her or be with her” Dw babe it’s a rite of passage for all of us you’ll figure it out

- “Your French is ugly” 🥹👉👈 weally?

- “the dress for my body” LOOK I know what she meant, but I can’t help it that my mind is perverted

- LMFAO NOT GLORYHOLE PARK

- okay why Loumand playing with my heart “I will never harm you. And I never have” wtf wtf wtf

-Oh no the ole business card trick! we all know that’s Louis’ kryptonite he loves a man with credentials

- i like girls, but why is santiago kinda…

- Woah the Annika scene was really hard to watch which I think was the point but goddamn idk if I’ll be able to rewatch that part

- Estelle is my self-insert. I’m claiming her.

- “You both fucked Lestat!?!” HOW DID THEY KNOW WE WANTED HIM TO SAY THAT!?

- “He tasted of vermouth and annihilation” We both know you have no earthly idea what that man tastes like, Armand. Be so fucking fr right now.

- Did Armand just casually drop that he had a threesome with a father and son? I’m sorry, sir????

- “Now I know what two blood fat cocks slapping hands feel like” When I tell you my spirit left my body

- oh shit here we go. I’m a caged animal and it’s time for my weekly enrichment. give me my loustat.

- there’s a letter !?!? Wait wait I wasn’t ready for something like this wait stop stop please

- “all my love belongs to you. you are its keeper” just take me out back and shoot me at this point

- “it is a thin veil” fucking fuck why was that so romantic??

- the blood tears welling up in Lestat’s eyes I’m-

- “Rebound of my life” and in that moment, he spoke for the people

- WHAT IS HAPPENING???? Jesus Christ, they were talking about Alice and then it cuts to FUCKING ARMAND!?! This is not a drill. Everyone to your stations, this is not a drill.

- “You sold your Dad’s playboy magazines at recess” Hmmm? You’re telling me a “straight” teenage boy sold porno mags instead of keeping them for himself??? Yeah, I call gay on that one

- “she wanted to say yes” you motherfuckers.

- Oh shit Louis is pissy tonight rawr kitty got claws

- Devils minion girlies are thriving, skin glowing, hair silky, breath minty, pillow cold, stomach full, dreams sweet, and by Jove, we fucking deserve it !!!!

- daniel’s shaky “um- gulp” …….guys this is gonna sound crazy but i think there might actually be a god

- ooh the camera/photography being like a divide or barrier between Louis and his present situation. Like he wants to capture the moments, but only as if an onlooker and not a participant… interesting!

- “Who?” will never not be funny

- “Mon ami” in the same episode as “Mon Cher” FUCK ME GENTLY WITH A CHAINSAW

- “Armand for you” nah nah nah i changed my mind, you can do like Leatherface and shove that chainsaw in rough and hard

- Close up on Louis’ conflicted face, fire blazing behind him…. That’s not foreboding in any way. I’m sure they’ll all live happily ever after from now on :D

What a ride! Until next week! 🧛‍♂️🩸

[icyharrington]

Hayyyy prompt 13 & 18 with Stevie ??

Yesss OKAY ill do them as 2 separate ones if that’s ok?? Also I’m sorry this turned out way longer than I intended, I think it’s around 2k words so not exactly a blurb lmfao but ohhh well ^_^

Contains: vaginal sex, car sex, bratty reader, daddy kink (sorry to those who aren’t into that lmaoo i just feel like steve has a daddy kink)

13. “If you keep looking at me like that we won’t make it to a bed.”

It’s just about sundown, and Steve pulls down the visor of his car with a grimace as he’s hit head-on by a potent ray of orangey light. “Jesus, that’s fucking blinding!”

The situation isn’t much better on the passenger side, where you’re seated in your denim shorts and crop top, thigh bouncing with excess energy from hours of remaining still. You dip your head down to avoid the beams of sun, sighing impatiently. “How close are we to the motel?”

“You’re the one with the goddamn map, (y/n)!” he snaps irritably, clearly struggling to maneuver his head between you and the sunbathed road. “Shit! It’s like someone’s shining a flashlight right in my eyes!”

It’s been approximately twelve hours since your road trip to California with your boyfriend had commenced, and Steve had gotten it in his head to take some of the backroads during rush hour in order to avoid the traffic. He turned out to be right about that theory, with the roads being sparsely populated for miles on end, but neither of you have any clue where you are anymore. “Just fucking pull over at this point.”

Steve complies with your suggestion, forearm flexing deliciously as he shifts his beloved BMW into park, choosing a shady spot out of the way of the street. He’s visibly stressed, with his hair starting to go limp due to an extended period without a Vera Fawcett touch-up. “Let me see the map. I marked where the motel is, so we just need to figure out where we are right now.”

He retrieves the pen he has tucked behind his ear, clicking the back down with his mouth as he swipes the gigantic map from your hands. Resting it up against the dashboard, he scans the tiny dots and letters with knit brows until he finally turns back to you with a solemn expression. “Yeah, I  have no fucking clue where we are.”

“Well, this sucks,” you gripe, sliding down in your seat until your butt is hanging off, like you’re melting into a puddle right there on the floor of Steve’s car. “I’m so fucking bored.”

“Well, damn! Sorry that you don’t like playing I Spy with me!” Steve says, appearing genuinely offended. “Just give me a few minutes and I can figure this out, okay? We can’t be more than an hour away from the place.”

“Oh, fantastic. Only an hour?” you groan, not attempting to hide your sarcasm in the slightest.

Steve shoots you a pointed glare, opening his mouth to speak before apparently deciding against it, instead giving you an incredulous shake of his head. Then he goes back to studying the map, leaning forward as he rests his elbows on his denim-clad knees.

You stare at him from where you still sit slumped, pushing yourself back up onto the seat so you can stretch your bare legs out in front of you. Your shorts are impossibly short and high-waisted, to the point where the pockets stick out the back; they’re Steve’s favorite, not that he’s paying you any attention in them right now. Your sneakers have been discarded into the backseat, leaving your lower half bare save for a pair of calf-length tube socks.

Resting one leg onto the dashboard, you use the other to nudge Steve with your foot. “Steve.”

He keeps his eyes fixed on the map, rubbing the underside of his chin pensively. “I’m kinda in the middle of something, (y/n).”

Rolling your eyes, you give him another poke, kicking your legs up into the air once his focus is back on you. You can see the way his hazel eyes linger on the smooth expanse of your thighs and calves, jaw just barely clenching at the sight.

You just can’t stop yourself from distracting him; after all this time  staying put, you’re in desperate need for some action.

“No,” he says sternly, as you return your foot to his leg, rubbing him playfully. “Do you want to get to the motel by the end of the night or not?”

“But I’m so horny,” you whine, a pout evident on your painted lips. You dance your legs back and forth in front of you, using one hand to idly pull at the front of your top. “I can’t stop thinking of your big dick filling me up.”

You hear his breath catch in his throat, a rosy flush rising to prominence in his angular cheeks. He glances down to your cleavage, which you show off to him proudly, stretching the fabric down even further until your lacy pink bra is on full display. “Fuck. Babe, please- you know I want you, but we need to figure this out before it starts to get dark. I’ll give it to you good when we get to the motel, yeah? I promise.”

He draws a cross over his heart with his fingertips, but you aren’t satisfied with the declaration. The more you look at him, the more you crave him- the smell of his shampoo and musky deodorant, and his aftershave, buried in the crook of your neck and sinking into your skin, pressed as closely as your atoms will allow. The thought makes your head spin, a burning urge making itself known in the pit of your stomach.

You center your vision on him, with his plump lips and cutting jaw, fixing your eyes into wide, deceptively sweet pools of longing; your mouth is slightly parted as you take sharp gulps of oxygen into your lungs, your heart racing at the prospect of getting what you want. He can’t resist you when you’re like this, all faux-innocent and needy, which is exactly the reason why you’re putting this show on for him.

“But Steve…” you purr, tits heaving with each quickened breath. “I need you.”

You can sense that he’s trying not to fall into your trap, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment as he shakes his head slowly. “If you keep looking at me like that, we won’t make it to a bed.”

“So?” you counter, lashes fluttering. Unbuttoning your shorts with a quirk of your eyebrow, you test him, bringing the fabric down just low enough that he can see the lace of your panties peeking out.

“Ah, shit. Fuck it. Get over here.”

You’re unable to contain your excitement, squealing out gleefully as Steve undoes his jeans, wiggling his hips in order to pull them lower. He scowls at you resentfully, but the edges of his lips twitch as he fights back a smirk.

“What’re you waiting for, huh? You were the one begging me for my big dick- now hurry up and strip for me.” He licks his lips, pulling his boxers down with his jeans to reveal his semi-hard cock, the view of which makes your mouth water.

You follow through with Steve’s commands, figuring they’re only fair. There’s a sense of pride that washes over you when you witness Steve grow fully hard, seemingly in perfect time with you removing your skimpy top and even-skimpier shorts. You don’t take off your matching bra and panty set from Victoria’s Secret, seeing that you would rather not be seen butt naked in the middle of who-knows-where by some pervy truck driver, and also because it’s cute and you spent a lot of money on it.

Steve doesn’t complain, though; his teeth sink into his lower lip as his eyes drink in your figure, draped all in lingerie that you purchased specifically with him in mind.

“You like it, Steve?” you ask, although the dumbfounded look on his face already gives away the answer to your question. “I got it just for you.”

“You are so goddamn sexy,” he mutters, taking a greedy hold of your backside with both hands as you climb into his lap. “Fuck the underwear. It’s all you.”

“Oh, please,” you giggle, flustered by his complimentary nature, though you should probably be used to it at this point. “You’re just saying that.”

Steve reaches between your legs, a low groan escaping his throat when he discovers how aroused you are, petting you experimentally through the brightly colored lace that veils your pussy. “Mhm. Don’t try and play modest, baby. You know you always drive me crazy. Now c’mon and ride me.”

He tugs your panties to one side, holding them in place for you while you position yourself to straddle him. Once your narrow, slick entrance is lined up with the wide tip of his cock, he brings his hands to support your hips, hissing as he guides you down into his lap.

His length stretches you wide, just like every other time he fucks you- he isn’t just being delusional when he claims to be packing, like most of the other college-age boys are. It hurts a little in the beginning, but he peppers your throat with open-mouthed kisses until your thoughts are incoherent, and you hardly notice the burning pain anymore. “Steve…”

“That’s my girl,” he praises lowly, his fingertips digging possessively into the padded flesh of your upper thighs; his face is hidden in your neck, words vibrating against your jugular, and you’re so overwhelmed with arousal that all you can do is whimper. “Won’t stop whining until daddy splits her on his cock, will she?”

You shake your head deviously, rocking your hips in a slow, easy rhythm; you tilt your head back, eyes blurred and vacant as Steve trails his veined hands up and down your body, cupping your breasts through your bra before traveling one down to rub circles on your clit. “Yeah. My babygirl’s being so nice and quiet for me now, finally.”

His voice is raspy, shaking; he thrusts his hips up underneath you, causing you to cry out, moving up and down on him faster. Steve slides the straps of your bra down your shoulders in preparation to free your breasts from their obscuring garment, attaching his lips to the space in between your breasts and collarbone and leaving bruises in his wake. “That’s it, baby. Take my cock like a- fuck- good girl.”

There’s sweat beading on your forehead, and you wrap your arms around him, needing his scent to envelope you entirely. You’re both moaning, immersed in your shared state of lustful bliss as he fucks you open, so hard and deep that you can practically feel him in your throat.

He continues circling your clit with his fingers, pushing in hard to make you squirm. His teeth scrape alongside your nipple, breaking several blood vessels in the process, which he takes obvious delight in. “If I make you cum on my dick, will you be a good girl for the rest of our trip? Hm?”

You pretend like you’re thinking about it, though at the moment you’re not exactly able to form a cohesive idea. “Maybe if you make me cum r-really hard…” you choke out, shocked by how much you’re struggling with the simple task of speaking.

He takes your face in his hand, eyes narrowing sternly. “No. It’s either yes or no, or you get nothing at all, ‘kay?”

“Fine! I’ll be a good girl, Steve, I swear. Just make me cum,” you beg, boosting your momentum so that you’re bouncing on him, your pussy taking his massive length with obscene, wet sounds. “Please?”

He chuckles at the panicked tilt of your voice, rolling his body underneath your own as he massages your clit in fervent, nonsensical shapes. “S’what I thought. Go on and cum for me, baby.”

As if he’s just recited some type of spell, your body obeys him without hesitation; an unabashedly loud cry escapes you as the orgasm ripples throughout your body, your walls clamping tightly around him.

Steve’s lips curve into a smirk as he observes you coming undone in his lap, stroking your hair affectionately when you eventually collapse into his chest, gasping with exhaustion.

“Good girl,” he whispers, tracing his right hand back and forth up your spine. “Now will you stop whining and distracting me?”

You let out a puff of air, your voice muffled by the fabric of Steve’s old band t-shirt. “Fine. As long as I can make you cum now, too.”

[armandisdaddy]

We’re Just Friends Chp.3-Modern Au! Rhaenyra x Dornish Male Reader

Pairing: Rhaenyra Targaryen x Dornish Fem!Male Reader (House of Blackmont) Cragen Stark x Fem!Male Reader

Content/Warning: !!🔞PLUS!! Angst, Denial, Some Sexual Content, Tension,p in a penetration ,breeding kink, unprotected sex, Smut, oral both males receiving, toxic love, LOTS of Jealousy, and a bit of a love square. (No not a triangle lmfao) guy on guy action this chapter.

Author’s Notes:The reader and Rhaenyra are going to be quite back and forth but trust that the reader isn’t necessarily waiting for her. They know where things stand with her or at least that’s what they tell themselves so in this series you will see them dating or fucking other people. *shrugs*

Chapter Three

Last night was a bit of a blur. Not to mention this hangover was tearing you up. You had a brain splitting headache and you couldn’t even sit up without feeling like you wanted to hurl. Waking up you heard giggling in the living room and you knew exactly who it was…Lydia and Rhaenyra…how could she..? After what happened last night you thought..she’d realize the two of you were meant for each other…but old habits die hard you guessed. You sighed and dragged yourself into the kitchen to get a glass of orange juice. Nyra gave you a knowing look and Lydia sneered at you. You rolled your eyes at the both of them and went back into your room. Plopping back into the bed you just wished you could disappear and be any where else away from here.

Your phone pinged and you saw it was your Nyra

Bestie

“Look last night was a mistake…I’m sorry. It won’t happen again and I know you hate me especially after what Lydia said to you but I promise she’s gonna be better.”

You don’t even bother to respond you left her on read and let out a loud “Wowwwww!!!!” Laughing obnoxiously did she really think that was going to make you forgive her after she used you and made you feel stupid again? Just when you were about to throw your phone somewhere you got another message

Unknown number

“Hey it’s Cragen…from the club last night. Sorry I didn’t get to text you I had gotten into the find that ended everyone’s night.”

You

“Oh so you and some other jackass ruined the party..lol I’m just kidding, hey.”

Cragen

“My apologies I had a bit too much to drink…so do you have anything planned for today? I wanted to actually hang out somewhere..maybe get to know you better.”

You

“No I was actually going to sleep off this headache but I’m down. Where we meeting up at?”

Cragen

“I know this great spot that has brunch. I’ll send you the location.”

You

Okay bet I’ll meet you there.

Without another thought you hopped into the shower with the biggest smile on your face. You were excited to make a new friend…maybe more even though this thing with Rhaenyra had your brain and heart at a war with each other. It wasn’t fair and you decided that there was to be no more slip up and now it was time to find out who you were without here. After you finished your shower you did some light eye make up and let your hair dry in its natural wavy state. Now it was time to find something to wear. Looking around in your closet you found a cute baby blue crop top and a denim miniskirt with white platform boots. “Cute.” You said to yourself looking at yourself one more time before grabbing your bag and keys to head out.

Walking past Rhaenyra opened her mouth but decided not to speak you stopped noticing looking back at her almost daring her to say something. Lydia still oblivious as fuck she smiled you and you sneered. “Save that fake shit for someone who gives a fuck…you don’t like me and I don’t like you. But, I promise you have nothing to worry about. Your girlfriend and I are no longer friends apparently a disrespectful cunt is more important than me.” You gave a halfhearted smile and rolled your eyes leaving the both of them speechless and looking at each other for answers. If this was how you were to be treated you were going to make the rest of this semester extremely hard for the both of them.

You hopped into your car and pulled off. You saw the place Cragen was talking about and already knew where you were going. You and Rhaenyra use to go here all the time. It took no time for you to get there and to your surprise he was already standing there waiting for you. After parking and getting out you smiled shyly and he opened his arms for a hug which you gave him without hesitation. His arms wrapped around you and fuck was he strong the way he squeezed you…felt perfect like you belonged there while you wrapped your arms around his neck. “Hey. You look amazing as usual.” His voice deep as he inhaled your scent. You blushed and smiled “You look good too.” Once the two of you pulled away he led you to a booth and you already knew what you wanted. The waitress greeting you and giving him a menu already having brought you a mimosa knowingly.“You come here a lot, yeah?” He looked at you while he still needed to look through the menu. You smiled thinking about the many memories here with Nyra. “Yeah, this Nyra and I’s…well it was our favorite spot.” Your voice was once bubbly and excited became low with sadness. “Did…something happen between you two?”

You sighed softly. “Yeah let’s just say her girlfriend doesn’t like me and I don’t really like her either she’s always been rude to me only tolerating me when Rhaenyra was around and well a few days ago she just went off on me. Saying I was too close…and Rhaenyra defended me broke up with her…but somehow they are back together.” Cragen winced and sighed softly grabbing onto you hand from across the table. “I’m sorry to hear that, Y/N. You don’t deserve that, but if you need a new friend to pass the time with you’ve got me.” You smiled feeling the warmth of his hand, while you looked into his eyes. “I’d like that…” The two of you smiled at each other and the brunch continued with moments of silence and then an uproar of conversation. He was actually very funny and had a personality he wasn’t your basic college jock and you were grateful to have crossed paths with him.

After a while of mimosas and food you both were stuffed and feeling a bit of a buzz. You both didn’t want to leave each other’s presence so soon so you asked him to follow you home. “Want to hang at my place with me. We can watch movies?” He gave that handsome smile and agreed. “Sure, sounds like a good time.” You giggled and once he paid the tab y’all were getting into your cars so that he could follow. Now that you were back at your shared apartment. You and Cragen came inside to still see Rhaenyra and Lydia still there cuddling seeming as though they were in the middle of something. Cragen waved awkwardly, Rhaenyra spoke but she was so obviously pissed, Lydia was none the wiser and you stayed quiet walking past them into your room. “What are whore wasn’t he just with your brother?” Rhaenyra shot a look at her “What fucking business is it of yours? Come on we’re going to your place tonight.” Lydia shrunk from her attitude and was confused they were only just laughing moments ago what was her problem. “o..okay..” she whispered grabbing her things while Rhaenyra packed a quick bag before leaving.

Now the two of you were alone in the house and you went into the bathroom to change into some shorts versus the skirt. Cragen was sitting rigidly on the edge of your bed when you came back in and you smiled. “You can get comfortable, Craggy. Let’s find something to watch.” You turned on your tv and laid down pulling him up with you by the arm. “Can I lay on you?” He looked down at you and chuckled. “Sure go for it.” You laid your head on his chest and laid your thigh high sock covered leg over his waist. His rough hands grabbed underneath your knee and the other your lower back pulling you in closer. You blushed and turned twilight on and he laughed. “I love this movie but it sucks.” He laughed. “I know right terrible but a guilty pleasure of mine.” You smiled at him as things began to die down and you watched the movie.

His fingers mindlessly trailed over your exposed skin causing goosebumps to form on your skin. You sighed softly and cooed every now and then which he took notice of rather quickly. “Craggy, you ever been with a guy before?” He looked away from the screen and down at you again. “I have…” You nodded and he sat up a bit. “I know I said I was your friend…and I am truly…but I’m attracted to you, Y/N. Ever since we met last night you’ve been on my mind and I don’t want to overstep my boundaries…but being this close to you…has me hard as fuck.” Your cheeks ran red and could see the lust in his eyes. You couldn’t deny that you were attracted to him too and even felt safe with him. “You’re not overstepping…I want you too..” that’s all he needed to hear before his lips crashed into your plush ones. His hand squeezing your thigh before easing up to squeeze your round ass cheek. Your lips worked together and your tongues found each others rather quickly he groaned into the kiss and you whimpered softly as he pulled you on top of him both hands full of your ass squeezing and kneading it like dough. “Fuck, it’s so soft.” He growled biting into your neck while he thrusted up into you pressing his hard cock against you. He was gentle but rough at the same time. Something you’d never experienced before from anyone. You were all too eager to get his pants off and he didn’t stop you as you fumbled with his jeans pulling them off once you figured out the button.

You saw his cock freed from his boxers and you were shocked at how big he was…scared even. He saw the look on your face and chuckled pulling you back in. “I’m sure you can take it, baby…don’t worry I won’t ruin you yet.” You shuddered in his hold and your own erection began to press into your shorts. He took no time to rip a hole into those thin shorts that hugged every part of you just right. Your cock fell from them and he smiled grabbing on to it causing you to hiss as he squeezed your already pulsating length while his pressed against your ass cheek. He decided to flip you around now his cock was in your face and yours in his. He was too focused on your ass though. Kneading and smacking it watching it bounce with each smack. Your whimpers and moans were driving him crazy and so you grabbed onto his cock striking it slowly before licking the tip and popping it into your mouth. He exhaled softly and trembled feeling your warm and wet mouth sucking him so well. “That’s a good boy…” you trembled at those words and he spread your ass apart lapping at the entrance. You tasted so good he groaned into you biting each cheek before go back to eating and sucking on your tight hole. “oh gods…” you whimpered softly before his hand pushed your head back down. Your eyes rolled back as you continued to suck him sloppily getting him nice and wet and he began fucking your face mercilessly. “So…fucking good…” he moaned helplessly. You were taking in by his voice, his smell, his taste and the way he held you in his hands.

“You got any lube?” He asked and you nodded getting up to get it for him. He stood up and placed you against the wall he was so much more taller than you as he hovered next to you spreading your apart letting some lube drip onto your asshole and he smiled letting one of his thick fingers rub the substance into it before plunging it inside you. You gasped and moaned lowly the arch in your back deepening. “That’s it…” he praised you slowly pumping his finger into you while his face was close to your ear. “When I’m finished with you just know this is mine now.” You nodded quickly your sweet moans filling the room and soon they grew louder once he added another finger. You were so warm and tight he couldn’t wait to bury his cock into you. Your knees buckled together and he pulled his fingers from you drenching his cock in lube lining his cock up to your entrance. Holding your cheeks apart and prodding at your hole until it gave slowly pushing his cockhead in first. You hissed feeling your hole being stretched wider than normal but he was still so gentle and slow. He hummed at how tight you squeezed him and he wasn’t even already in yet.

“That’s a good baby…take it.” Fuck why did he have to talk like that. After he sat still for a while he began to thrust slowly until he was completely inside you. Picking up the pace he wrapped his arm around your throat and pulled your back against his chest pounding into you incessantly. You were losing your train of thought he was fucking into you so roughly hitting your sweet spot with every thrust of his hips and you could no longer hold yourself together. “Y/N you feel so good. You gonna let me breed this slutty hole of yours?” Your eyes rolled. “Yes….please daddy…cum in my slutty hole.” He groaned and continued to slam his cock into you his pelvis smacking into your ass echoed off the walls and he wrapped a hand around to grab onto your length. “We’re cumming together…” he spoke quickly and breathlessly as he stroked and pumped your cock as if you weren’t already overstimulated enough. “Oh my…fuckkkk…Cragen I’m gonna cum…” he chuckled so devilishly hearing those words. “Come on my sweet boy make a mess for Daddy.” Your eyes rolled and you lost it exploding all over your bedroom wall and soon his thrusts slowed down and he was filling you with his seed. Afterwards he carried you to bed and spooned with you. But that didn’t last long before he was fucking into you from the side. Let’s just say the two of you were rather busy for the rest of the night…

to be continued…

[chenfordspiral]

Okay, I’m sending this on here because this is where we first interacted. It has now made me think if this is the right day we met though, because the 14th was when we first started speaking on discord so was it the same day ? Anyhow 🤣 HAPPY BESTIE-VERSARY

We say this all the time, but I still can’t believe I met you because of Chenford and because you’re an indecisive bitch 🤣but thank goodness you are, because if you weren’t, I wouldn’t have met my best friend. I’m genuinely so grateful to have you in my life, like it’s just more enjoyable having you in it, so really, truly, Thankyou 🫶 my partner in chaos, my future roommate, my soul sister, my fellow witch in crime, i love you ❤️

I sometimes hate the internet (okay, a lot) and I mean, I do kind of have a point lmfao, but it did bring me my bestie so I guess I’ll say it’s not too bad 🤣

Btw, answer me back bitch, where are you ? Are you writing again ? Are you watching tbbt ? If you’re watching bones, I forgive you. If you’re not, I’m holding this against you for at least two days

Jk, love you lots 🫶

Well, for once I was actually not writing or watching anything but I *was* going over my notes for that multi chapter I've been planning since May and just told you about. I finally decided to choose the more painful route (yo welcome!), so normal stuff. Wait, does that also count as writing? Either way, I'm sorry for my late replies last night haha. You know I answered as soon as my tears were dry (do not recommend crying before going to sleep btw) not long after you texted me so please don't be mad at me for two days because just the thought makes me sad 😭

ANYWAY. I can't believe it's been a year! Feels like so much longer and yet like no time has passed at all. And you know what, I think that first tumblr interaction was just a day or two before? It says Feb 13th for me so I'm saying it was the 13th, which is definitely a sign girl. If anyone ever says that a TV show or a fictional couple can't change your life, they're wrong. Because look at this weird ass friendship we've build because of Chenford. I would not want to change it for the world because life is just so much better with you in it and I'm forever grateful I got mad at you and then DM'd you on discord a day later 😂 that was very unlike introverted, shy me but hey, I'm learning!

Future roommate, partner in chaos, fellow witch in crime, soul sister.. bestie. I love you lots too ♥️ happy bestie-versary 🫶🏻

[kentopedia]

omg i am sending an ask bcz i think we have the same standpoint on this but i was on ao3 b4 tumblr so i was honestly rly confused when i was learning tumblr culture around here & saw how long fics & series’ weren’t popular/didn’t do as well on here than ao3 😭 i even actually disliked oneshots i never reached for them up until writing on here bcz i would always b like “IT’S NOT ENOUGHH” LOL i love the art of expanding on storylines :’) def no hate to people who do bcz ofc i’ve written the same & i love a good short fic to indulge in & rest my brain, but i agree w/ you long ones r my absolute favs & i cherish the people who write them on tumblr tons…sorry if this is js rambling lmfao but THIS IS JS ENCOURAGEMENT FROM ME TO YOU RYLIE i’ll always b around to read what you put out when i can bcz i know you’re in love w/ details & crafting stories :) <3 <3 & i’m def eyeing tht au if it’s sfw !! I’D READ IT FS to hear 8.6k words makes me so excited 🙂‍↕️

OMG OKAY SAME. i've been using ao3 forever, and only came onto tumblr to read/write fics a couple years ago. but until that point i had only written multi-chap fics so... yeah 😭 a reality check, to say the least. it sucks bc there used to be a lottt more series on here when i first started a blog, and now there's ... not. which there's a lot of reasons why i think they're declining, but people not supporting writers is the main one :/

i much prefer them as well, i feel the exact same way as you!!! i loooove to get into a lengthy fic. and i understand why people tend to write one-shots more bc writing longer fics takes a lot of time, which many don't have, and this is a hobby. but, i feel like on ao3, i have never published something and been like ohh this will flop BECAUSE it's long. which is how i feel on here :(

ALSO YOU'RE SO SWEET <3 SOB :,,,) that means the world to me. hehe also you've probably seen me say it's a moulin rouge au, so more-so suggestive than explicit (it'll pretty much follow the movie). you are welcome to read it if you're comfortable <3 i'm also nervous bc ... its abt a character i have not posted about before HAHAH so it's always a little scary >< but thank you so much for the words of encouragement!! i'm very excited to read the rest of ur fyodor & dazai fic hehe, i adored the first part !! i love that it's so long <3

[zorosdimples]

i really appreciate you holding on for the wild ride, it ended up being much more of a word vomit than i anticipated 😅 this is also gonna be long to explain it all but:

okay so my OC, calrik, is from an original fantasy fiction work i have tentatively called ‘homeward bound’; it’s been a passion project for like idk 10+ years and the characters in it are like the original 4 OCs for me lol. he (funnily enough) resembles laios physically (blonde, 6’4, a guard so Fit, brown eyes) but also has freckles and is a wolf shapeshifter (simply put, but it’s more complicated than that) (which is probably that’s why I love laios, your honor). premise of that WIP’s world is an empress (ilantha) of celestial blood and her three closest and highest ranked guards (saelihn, merric, and calrik) (none of which start out in those positions except the empress) up being divinely intertwined in changing the course of the empires’ history. fated love, fated loss, coronations and galas and sneaking away to not get caught, fae and wolf shapeshifters, personified celestial bodies and primordial / ancient spirits, heinous war crimes, children with trauma responsible for way too much, not a parent in sight lmfao. that being said, the kidnapping was happening from the Big Baddie™️ in that world and calrik busted in.

with the SW AU, it’s an AU of my own work (lmfao). calrik is an inquisitor, brother to merric (supreme leader); sae is a force sensitive rebel (not proper Jedi) and tasked with transporting / protecting ilantha (actual Jedi, Princess of Alderaan). the girls get captured, put on star killer base, and interrogated by the guys. of course they pair bc where else would the enemies to lovers come in. cal interrogates sae, and she’s restrained. since sabers turn on, they have an activation mechanism hums. so while he’s interrogating her, choking her, calling her pet and telling her to speak up, he traces the humming, vibrating end of the saber—while ignited—along her body until its against her thrumming cunt. hence: a lightsaber vibrator as means of an interrogation method.

now Laios…… holy shit yeah. that’s exactly what im thinking about!!!! an aphrodisiac that the longer the body doesn’t register you’re breeding (aka using it), the worse it gets. teaching him how to touch you, and he ends up being exactly the touch you’ve always imagined having. its so innocently perfect, and before he’s even had his turn, a glob of cum has stained his pants. he’s panting, pupils swollen; at one point you have to remind him to take the armor off because he’s so into you, enraptured. now imagine you’re the monster that hit him with the pollen……………….. like a fae dryad or somethin………. holy shit yeah.

thank you for indulging me 🙂‍↕️ im so sorry this is a damn novel lol

putting this under the cut since i rambled A LOT!

sav what the FUCK that world you’ve built sounds so incredible and well thought out; i LOVE fantasy but it’s daunting to write/create fantastical worlds because there are so many elements you must consider and balance. effective world building is a feat—and you have so many interesting characters that you’ve also created to boot! i’m obsessed with how similar cal is to laios ooohuuhgghhhhhh i will lose my mind (go insanely horny) over him.

AND THE STAR WARS AU???????? okay first of all: brilliant, show-stopping, incredible. putting your own ocs from an original story into a pre-existing fictional universe is so big brained of you i don’t even know what to say. and enemies to lovers…my favorite flavor, truly. can i just say i wanna be in sae’s place because oh my god? i’m seeing the vibrating lightsaber vision and i want to experience it so desperately it’s not even funny.

finally LAIOS, MY LOVE! i have a bit of a reputation on my blog for being a virgin killer because there’s nothing more sexy and delicious to me than teaching someone inexperienced how to touch you; molding their concept of sexuality, exploring their interests, and leaving a lasting impression on them (even if you don’t stay together because they will never, never forget their first). and laios is the perfect virgin in my mind because he’s eager to please and he’s utterly shameless. he will lick your armpits and spit on your clit and suck on your tongue without a second thought because it feels and tastes so good; he has a one-track mind and it makes sex with him almost a religious experience. the sex pollen trope on top of that makes him feral for you…i don’t even know what to say about the idea of you being the monster—like…UGH. he gives you a run for your money!

anyway thank you for sharing with me; i’m kissing you and your gorgeous brain <3

[alittlebitofeverythingtbh]

Here For You

Corey x gn!reader

Warnings: none

Authors note: This is super self indulgent lmfao but I thought it would be perfect as a comfort Corey fic :)

Fighting back tears, you found yourself picking up your friend Corey Cunningham from work. It seemed like a funny routine: you’d pick him up, go out for food, and then usually binge horror movies when you got home. But you knew he was gonna question you the moment he looked at you.

Soon enough, Corey hopped into your car, mechanic suit covered in grime from the long shift he had. He turned to you with a smile before it faded quickly, noticing you looked upset. “Hey hey, everything okay?” he asked, worried. You shook your head angrily, “no, not really. Remember my partner?” Corey nodded, remembering you complaining about your various relationship problems you had with your ex. He never liked your ex personally, but mostly it was due to the unrelenting crush he had on you. Corey had picked up his phone many nights to hear you cry and ask for advice, not wanting to leave your ex.

“Guess what they fucking did. They’re with someone already! Not even a month after we broke up! Who the fuck does that?” you asked angrily. You didn’t notice Corey clench his knuckles at that, but you did hear him sigh. “I’m not surprised,” he said,” after all the shit they said to you? I’m really not. I’m so sorry you had to hear about that.” You laughed bitterly, remembering you had a similar conversation when your ex had mentioned to a friend about already using dating apps just after a week of breaking up.

“I just…I really thought they cared about me, you know?” you sniffled, “they said they’d love me forever and shit. Feels like a lie now.” Corey reached out and took your hand, rubbing his thumb against it soothingly. Your ex used to do that on car rides, but Corey’s was different. Much more soothing and kind, and he was someone who stuck around you far longer than most people did.

“Forget them, honestly. They used your feelings against you so many times, gaslit you even. They don’t deserve you,” Corey whispered. You leaned against him as his hand moved to your hair, running his fingers through it. “And no matter what, you’ll always have me,” he continued, “you’ll never have to see me go.”

For the first time in a couple months, you felt better. And it was all thanks to your dear friend Corey. You sat up and hugged him gently, with him squeezing you back. “Thank you Corey, that means a lot,” you said.

Corey couldn’t help but smile as he hugged you back, content with you feeling better already. “Let’s go get a milkshake, hm?” he asked. You nodded and started the car back up, pulling out of your parking space as you began driving to the nearby diner. Ready to forget about your ex and have a good night with Corey.

[3416]

okay. SO! i’m not a veteran hockey fan i’m a relative rookie (haha) and i would very much appreciate your expertise… i feel like bertuzzi is a good player?? i know he doesn’t have any goals but the way he plays and seemingly gives it his all is crazy impressive and i thought he was really good with mitch and auston? but he’s no longer with them in the starting line and so i’m wondering am i missing something or is this a keefe thing or maybe both… also i don’t like reaves how do you feel about him im so sorry for unloading all of this I JUST LOVE YOUR OPINIONS ON THE LEAFS!!!

JFLKDSJKLF I'M AFRAID I WOULDN'T CALL MYSELF A VETERAN EITHER, LOL, but i do appreciate that people want to hear my opinions, though they're evolving as i learn more and more. but THANK YOU FOR ASKING MY OPINION, I LOVE TALKING, LET'S GO. SORRY FOR THE LONG POST.

bertuzzi basically became a big name at the trade deadline last year as one of the most viable guys being moved around bc teams were trying to bulk up for the playoffs. he was traded to the bruins where it took him a bit of time to warm up tbh.. he played 21 regular season games with them and only scored 4 goals 12 assists, but then scored 5 goals 5 assists in their 7 playoff games before elimination... that made him a really big target during free agency this summer bc he kinda popped off under the most pressure w the playoffs, and the leafs were basically looking to acquire forwards who can do that and bring "grit". now personally..... i don't think watching 1 round of playoff performance is like the wisest decision when he's actually a VERY injury prone player.. like he's good when he's healthy but that's not smth you can predict. but i was also kind of fine with it bc we do need left wingers on this team and it's only a one year deal. at this point i'm feeling very ????? about him because... like the underlying numbers aren't horrible but he's just not finishing. he DOES have 2 goals and 1 assist so far, but plays aren't really like... being completed it feels like when he's out there. keefe's obviously not happy with him after demoting him to 4th line last night and saying he wasn't listening to the way he needed to simplify his game, and idk anything in depth abt the leafs setup or systems or technicalities to their game specifically so. IDK.... i don't know if it's just gonna take him some time to warm up here like it did in boston? or if he's being deliberately ornery/doesn't like it here like boston fans were implying yesterday lol (i doubt it... lol he wants good stats jsut as much as anyone going into ANOTHER contract year lmfao...). there's just no way to know... idk a lot about him personally besides the anti-vax stuff but i've mostly just been... kinda unimpressed with him both on the ice and off it. i don't think he's doomed, i think we just need more time to see.

reaves... i'm gonna be honest and say i have NO clue why he was a target for us or treliving this summer, lol. there is so much discussion about bringing an intangible 'toughness' to this team despite us bringing in some mean players like simmonds and muzzin in the past ... tried it last year at the trade deadline under dubas too with schenn and ror... didn't REALLY work.. and i'm like ? why did we think it was a good idea to overpay and overcommit to a player like reaves who does nothing but offer fights on the ice and good vibes off it. like treliving hadn't been around the leafs long enough to know what they needed in the ~room~, although he did know they lost guys like holl and kerfoot who were universally liked as people so??? maybe that's what he was trying to fill?? i like ryan a lot as a person, but i do think he's actually doomed from a hockey player/stats perspective like.. we will not be getting anything more out of him as a player, and frankly after yesterday where he didn't really fight or get pushy with anyone after the marchand thing... and hasn't since the second game... i'm not sure we'll get the fighting aspect much either.

[alovelyburn]

Rambles about the Conviction Arc Part 10

So we have arrived at the volume which contains the halfway mark of the series to date (at least in collected form). It’s kind of wild to think about, because Volume 20 came out in October 2000, which really drives home how much the publication speed slowed down.

I never really minded the waits honestly, but it is interesting. In retrospect, maybe the waits should have been even longer.

Anyway, lets get going. There’s a lot of cool stuff coming up.

Rambles about the Conviction Arc Part 10

So, Mozgus gets stung by the Behelit Apostle. Luca, Isidro, Jerome and Nina get corned by evil spirits that came calling because of Casca’s brand, Casca was suspended inside the jelly spirits being protected by the demon child, aaaand....

1. Mozgus shows up and burns through all the jelly spirits with his fire breath, which results in Casca being ejected but it also seems to be what ultimately killed the demon baby doesn’t it? Because it spent a great deal of its power protecting her and then Mozgus blasts the goo, and it falls away on fire and then later shows up in the behelit apostle’s cave, dying.

It’s just interesting – I never quite made that connection (or if I did, I don’t remember.... looking at old meta reminded me of a lot of things I noticed and then forgot about and then rediscovered in later readings, woops), but like... the behelit apostle gave Mozgus his power, he burned down the baby, and then the behelit apostle swallowed him to form Griffith and that is causality at work. I just imagine IoE out there with vein-and-artery-tentacles moving things around.

Okay so as usual: disclaimer that I rarely have much to say about big fight scenes or what Jerome and Nina are doing, so I may skip a lot.

2. That said I’M SORRY I JUST CAN’T WITH NINA I HAVE ZERO SYMPATHY FOR HER.

I mean let’s think about this situation right. Nina gets herself in trouble by being a witch, which I would have a lot more sympathy for if it didn’t involve eating stew made of humans, and bringing her boyfriend there because I guess she thinks eating humans is not going to bother him? BUT IT DOES, so she panics and takes off out of nowhere with Elainsca. They get arrested, she lets Casca get taken and then rats her out because of one pulled fingernail. Meanwhile, Luca is dragging her completely mundane backside through enemy headquarters to find and rescue them, and by total chance ends up falling from a building and Nina’s first thought is, SHE’S SO HEAVY followed by a powertrip about how she could just let go and Luca would die.

Now, don’t get me wrong here, I understand the psychology involved here. Nina feels helpless – that’s been one of her big issues this entire time. She’s helpless and weak and Luca is strong and protects her, she resents falling under the wing of someone so much stronger and kinder than her. I mean that’s probably why she fell in with the cannibal cult to begin with – that kind of group targets people who feel lost or sad or helpless. LIKE, I GET IT, but at the same time, oh my God.

And then Luca goes and proves that she is the best person in this manga, lmfao. I mean look, morally speaking there’s not a lot of truly good people in Berserk, but Luca is definitely one of them. 

Obviously Skull Knight agrees.

Anyway.

3. I  also think Luca is one of the best done female characters in the series. She’s consistent, she’s complicated, she’s charismatic and interesting, and she’s heroic on a normal scale that highlights the potential in humanity that is the other side of the horror that Berserk often focuses on.

That said, I’m curious as to why Skull Knight saved her. It doesn’t seem to have been a random act of kindness – I feel like he was interested in that seemingly self-sacrificial move and wanted to reward it or ask about it or something to that effect – it just makes me wonder if she’s reminding him of something or someone, or if he just likes people who stare death in the face, or something to that effect.

4. And here comes the next steps in the breaking down of Farnese’s world.

Trying to track where her head is at as the story progresses is pretty interesting. When she arrived at the Tower of Conviction, she had already been shaken by her encounter with Guts and the “miracles” that follow him around (or that he chases). She blames him for her doubts, she displaces her frustrations and fears onto him – he may not be the Hawk of Darkness, but he is responsible for her growing discontent and self-doubt, and she finds him distressing for it – later she calls him dreadful (an adjective also applied to Griffith but I’ll try to remember to hit that when it comes up).

And I mean every time she sees him the issue she has escalates even though he isn’t doing anything, right? It’s not too dissimilar to the reaction Gambino or his men had to Guts – he showed up and everything started going wrong, so its his fault.

Still she sees Mozgus and his followers transformed into these monstrous things, and they’re meant to be holy, aren’t they? It’s just another pebble in the wall between Farnese and her religion.

BUT AT THE SAME TIME, it does occur to me that a lot of the things Farnese is seeing actually are caused by Guts – or specifically by his brand – and that kind of is the reason her world starts breaking. If she hadn’t chased after Guts she never would have been there when his brand called all those spirits – hell, he wouldn’t have been in the situation to begin with given that she’s the reason he was there. She’d still be chugging along oblivious. I don’t know, it’s interesting because Guts actually is a walking disaster, isn’t he? And his presence, especially when Casca is also nearby, warps the world and shoots cracks through reality as your average person knows it.

And everyone who gets involved with them or anything around them gets dragged into it. I’m going to talk about that a LOT more next time, but for now...

Luca gets sucked into it too!  Because obviously, if Nina hadn’t run off with Casca, she wouldn’t be in this situation either!

5.Wait, did the behelit apostle just call Skull Knight a living human? I’m going to try not to overinterpret that, but it’s... interesting. I think I always assumed that he’s a spirit (or a corpse) possessing that armor or at least not a human anymore.

Also... I think the way the corpses are laid out is interesting – more on that in a hot minute.

Also I do actually feel really terribly for the behelit apostle. He has this horrifying backstory and he is one of the apostles that you can say has decent intentions even if some readers may disagree with his actual actions in bringing Griffith back to the world. All of which is just me saying that panel of said apostle shivering in fear made me feel bad for him.

6. And another take on the Hawk symbol. I’m still kind of struggling with people’s desire to separate half ot he Hawk identity from Griffith and give it to Guts or whoever else. Like I understand the impulse when it comes to the hero/villain separation, I guess. But I feel like the constant variations on the symbol and how they all fit into the mythos of Griffith kind of makes breaking them apart awkward at least in my mind.

So there’s the cleanest and most abstract take – the Holy See symbol of the Hawk of Light. And then there’s the Black Hawk on a Stick – a representation of the wings of darkness. And the white hawk on a stick which I think is a step closer to honesty than either of the others – being made of corpses and all that. And now we have this, which is probably the most honest of them all, isn’t it? The way it represents the way the sacrifice actually gives rise to Femto, or to NeoGriffith – a hawk made up of the corpses of the dead.  Even so, the shape it forms is that of the Hawk of Light symbol – a symbol of hope built from sacrifice. Whether you believe Griffith is evil or not, he’s still a symbol of hope and salvation to the people of Midland.

An idol made of the skin and bones of priests.

It tastes like old magic really.

7. I wonder who he was. The thing is, he can’t have grown up in that hole, you know? I mean this is kind of off the point and totally irrelevant and I don’t expect it to ever be relevant, but – if he had been born in  that hole he would have died. Also when he talks about his first memory being scrounging for things to eat in the trash, he’s not a baby or even a toddler, he’s at least a teenager judging from that build and musculature. So like, what’s he doing there? Who put him there? Where was he before this?

And I’ve said this before, but It’s not... possible for me to perceive Apostles and Godhand as inherently Just the Worst. Because the situations that give rise to them are so horrific, so painful, that I.... don’t blame them for their actions. It’s one of those situations where you don’t know what you’d do until you’re in the situation, and I feel like the people who insist they’d never ever under any circumstances ever don’t understand human nature, and I’m not saying that I think humans are evil. I just think.... it’s easy to say you’d never and you’d always and imagine that you’re above cracking when you aren’t, say...

Buried in the bottom of a hole being crushed under a pile of corpses. Or dying from the poison your son gave you. That kind of thing.

Kind of a tangent but I do feel for every single one of them, no matter how horrible their behavior is. Because wherever they landed, they crawled out of hell to get there.

“Five Angels.” So this is a relatively recent event, assuming he hasn’t been there since before the current Godhand.

8. So this is interesting to me – the sacrifice is the world around him, but he hasn’t actually delivered that sacrifice yet, and here he is... an Apostle. This reminds me of the flashback to the Count’s transformation – he appears to have killed his wife himself when he was already in his slug form, which....

Kind of makes me wonder, you know? Godhand are built from the deaths of their sacrifices, but with Apostles it seems like they change and then they have to  kill their sacrifices I guess? Or allow them to be killed as the case may be. I assume the consequence for not actually paying up is being dragged to Hell. Interesting.

Describing the Holy See as a deceit-filled system established to conceal the ugly chaos of the world hits different when you know Miura’s backstory regarding his father.

But I do think this is a pretty specific recounting, like he’s talking about how he grew up alone in the shadow of the tower, and then a bunch of new people showed up (the refugees that have been gathered around the tower throughout this arc), the indiscriminate nature of plague deaths and the panic it caused, followed by the Holy See sending their Knights and Mozgus there – the deceitful system controlling the area.

-the people caught between the plague behind them and the corrupt religion before them, and how that fear of death by sickness or witch-hunt gave rise to these death cults – that cauldron is the human soup, you know? They’re killing people out of fear of people being killed. The hunters (holy see) and hunted (witches/pagans), every one of the threatened (witches/pagans, holy see and the normals caught between these forces)... “was enthralled by the heat.” That’s interesting to me because, well it does come up a lot doesn’t it? The fire that is Griffith and the fires that represent dreams in the campfire scene. The burning corpses and the flames that Farnese fixated on.

It’s this sense to me that people take comfort and shelter and refuge in the literal and metaphorical fire but, like most things in berserk, there are two sides to it – the fire that comforts and the fire that burns. The fire that heals and the fire that kills.

And as for the behelit apostle himself...

He, an outsider rejected by the world, is left to be destroyed by the forces that have nothing to do with him. He’s just caught up in it as an innocent bystander as people are throwing the results of their suffering and fear down and killing him with it.

So what did he do after that – he took the corpses that nearly crushed him and laid them out individually like human beings.

9. Again, yet again, another statement on the nature of humanity, of their relationship with leaders, something that echoes back to Griffith and forward to Luca and so on and so forth. I’m a little braindead today as I’m typing this so bear with me if I’m less coherent than I’d like to be, but I feel very strongly about this so I’ma try it anyway.

I did a post a while back about the way Griffith seems to perceive (in his torture monologue) the people who bow and scrape to him and suck up to him. It’s kind of bouncing off of this:

Where he describes the way he affects people as inspiring either good will (which turns into trust or fellowship) or hatred, which turns into awe or dread. The best examples offhand of the latter would be I think Julius (dread) and Foss (awe) – the way they perceived him and the way their view of him evolves in relation to his actions around and toward them. It’s Julius seeing his face in the fire (MORE ON THAT IN A SECOND) or Foss turning into one of his biggest supporters after NeoGrififth returns to the world.

But if you think about that – the way he perceived “awe” when juxtaposed with the way the Hawks often reacted to him – he’s like a miracle, he’s like a saint, he’s like a hero from a storybook – it kind of tells you what he thinks of (some) of them, right? Like in the case of someone like Casca or Guts, these are people who more or less started out liking him (Guts needed a minute but you know) – that probably slots in his head into good will that turns to fellowship and trust. But someone like Foss, or someone like Corkus – people who begin with animosity and are kind of beaten into submission – they’re never going to really feel like they “like” him, I think. And this is kind of carried through in his relationship with the nobles who smile in his face and try to hitch a ride with him into glory but talk shit about him when he turns his back.

Anyway the point is, it’s that same idea – a recurring theme in the series. It’s also how Farnese ends up following Guts-  she starts with animosity and it changes first into dread (she even describes him explicitly as dreadful) and then into awe as she becomes one of his biggest supporters as well. Hell, it’s even represented in Farnese’s relationship with the pyre flames – she starts afraid and then she embraces it as a means of self-protection.

So like, ok why am I talking about Griffith in the midst of this ramble that has nothing to do with him, it’s because he, and his relationship with the world, is the biggest and most far-reaching example of what’s being brought up here. And that’s reflected in things like the behelit apostle talking about how all these desperate people – the feared and fearful, hunted and hunters, all fixating on the fire- the light – the thing that Griffith is repeatedly compared to. It’s also the thing Luca represents to someone like Nina – someone who doesn’t have strength behind her own light, so she stands in Luca’s and tries to keep warm, all the while resenting that she can’t supply enough heat to survive on her own.

But also I don’t think it doesn’t have anything to do with Griffith and here’s why. That description – that statement to the effect of “people gather and fixate on the light...”

Isn’t that explicitly what Griffith’s relationship with the Hawks was meant to be?

I mean this is why Guts left the Hawks - he didn’t want to be Nina, gathering around Griffith’s light and feeding on his heat to stay warm and resenting it. He wanted to have his own light that could sustain him... because he believed that Griffith could only respect someone who had that thing. The misunderstanding was personal between them but its also specific to Guts, because his lack of self-esteem blinds him to the reality that he already has his own light - that’s much of why Griffith is drawn to him to begin with.

That was kind of a tangent but I really think this stuff is important to the series. But back to the topic...

To emphasize the Griffith parallel we follow up with the behelit apostle literally sitting on the symbol that represents Griffith’s return, staring over a scene that evokes the bonfire flames:

And then, of course, the comparison is made very explicit:

Everyone gathers around fire, they seek the heat and support of those greater than they are, but in the end, there is one thing that they all crave – the greatest light, the greatest fire, and that is....

The hawk made of human skin? Yeah, well. The hawk made of material that resembles the faces in the Abyss – the faces on the landscape of the eclipse. And the symbol that represents, as Guts said, the biggest light, the blazing inferno. The collective will of humanity.

I think when (some) people read this kind of thing, whether it’s in the manga proper or in analysis thereof, there’s this desire to rebel against the idea that this thing made of dead flesh – this thing that killed their own men and sexually assaulted one of the major characters in the series, can really be intended to embody light – to be a savior, a messiah, whatever. And I do understand that, but I think to really get what’s being implied (and more than implied) you kind of have to let go of a lot of assumptions about what those things mean.

Darkness isn’t wholly bad, light isn’t wholly good, humanity doesn’t exclusively want good things or bad things, not every good intentioned thing you do has a good result and not every horrible thing you do has a bad result. And really, one big difference I think between Berserk’s concept of the messiah/the desired and the real world’s catholic/Christian concept of the same is that in the real world a messiah is meant to be better than humanity, and in Berserk it is explicitly someone who is representative of humanity, in all its beauty and ugliness. The IoE says that Griffith’s actions will be appropriate for humanity specifically because he himself is human.

Now, two other things to note about this:

-the Behelit apostle has a sacrifice brand on its tongue. I take this to mean that even though it’s an apostle, it’s ... also a sacrifice, as it must die to give rise to Griffith’s new form.

And also...

-he calls Griffith “the definitive missing piece between the old world and the new.” Which I think strongly supports the theory that the incarnated Godhand is meant to kickstart the next era of humanity by ending the present one (sometimes quite aggressively as in the case of the world merger) and bringing it through to the next stage.

There are some other things to support that, but most of them are far in the future. I will say that the Godhand behind Void, during the eclipse that presumably birthed Void, are made to resemble gods and monsters from the ancient world (Ancient Greece and Sumeria, etc).

The apostle’s story genuinely just breaks my heart but before I get into that...

10. These sections of chatter about like the worldbuilding, the way the Berserk cosmology is built, the Berserk take on fate and angels and the way things interconnect with one another are genuinely... genuinely... among my favorite scenes in the series. This is kind of popping off a little I guess, but one of the things that saddens me about the Berserk fandom as a whole is the general disinterest in the world itself – the cosmology, the philosophy, the focus on balance and cycles. It may sound strange from me, a person who literally writes shippy fanfic, but even as the characters  and relationships are precious to me, the world itself and the metaplot that carries it are just as important. I mean one of the main reasons I love Griffith so much is that he embodies the story’s themes more than anyone else... especially NeoGriffith which is why he’s my favorite Griffith variant.

In a lot of ways the characters exist as an expression of those themes and aspects of the world. Like okay Berserk is “about” the Guts and Griffith relationship, but the Guts and Griffith relationship is, in itself, an expression of the core theme of the story which is about the balance of opposites. If you see where Miura talked about how as the story progressed it would veer into things like Tao and Qi and then you look into Tao, you can start to piece that together and I’m not saying that I understand it all either – what I know about Tao can fit in a Wikipedia entry. But like think about the reason that Guts and Griffith are referred to as one another’s “other halves,” you know? And then there’s Godhand cycle.

That was kind of a sidetrack, but anyway yeah, what I get from this is that the new age is starting – and I think it’s shortsighted to say YEAH THE HORRIBLE AGE, THE AGE OF DARKNESS, because that’s just a tunnel you move through.

Now, the Behelit apostle.

11. “It will appear in exchange for such a tiny... no... for something that never even existed in this world. My existence.”

His desire to be remembered, to be understood, is heartbreaking to me and this next bit is actually from the end of a later chapter, but it closes off the main part of the Behelit Apostle’s story and doesn’t fit as well in sequence for my purposes (fine for pacing, just not for analysis), so let’s finish his story...

As he faces his own death.

And his what ifs, his regrets, his pain. The absolute loneliness. The desolation.

Miura said in one interview when he was talking about what ifs, that he thought a lot about what his life would have been like if he hadn’t met Koji Mori. And Mori himself had said on other occasions that if he hadn’t met Miura he would be in prison or dead.

There’s a certain melancholy in that kind of thought – the way your life might have collapsed if not for the sheer chance that you happened to come across, say, the right person or the right opportunity or the right moment that allowed you to evolve in a different direction.

Then there are the other kinds of what ifs - the ones where you wonder if your life could have been, would have been, better – happier, more successful, whatever – if you had taken one turn instead of another. We all have those thoughts, I think. And for me, it’s almost impossible to shake off the sadness in this one person’s story because... for someone whose life never amounted to anything except pain, there’s nothing but what ifs, right?

But.

He still had room for compassion. To recognize someone with the same pain and same terrible outcome as him – misshapen, rejected, about to die -- and offer them peace in their last moments.

After all that, when the Godhand offered him his wish... he said he wanted to create a better world.

....

Anyway back to things being horrifying.

I love this visual for how much the rising spirit flood resembles an enormous behelit apostle for a second there. And then comes....

Holy shit.

12. So I guess I talk about this a lot, but the Griffith and Guts parallels always stand out to me. Because like, the world itself is breaking right now because Griffith is on his way back into it, right? But Guts carries a similar effect around, doesn’t he? He warps reality wherever he goes because of the brands – the fact that he and Casca are in the same general area is part of the reason the area is being overrun by spirits to begin with and of course at the moment he’s breaking Farnese’s world, too. And obviously, the word used to describe Guts’ effect on Farnese is the same as the one used to describe Griffith’s effect on... polytheism I guess is really what it was.

Love the image of the Holy See symbol going up in flames as the last remnants of Farnese’s grip on the world she knew starts to come apart.

I mean one of the things that comes up Farnese is how much she’s changed but I guess that doesn’t really bother me because... okay thinking in like writer mode here... her fire fetish/fixation is established as being part of her effort to protect herself from her fear by embracing the things that frighten her, right? She makes the fire dance with her, and so she feels safe. That being the case it makes sense to me that her previous persona and most of her coping mechanisms fall apart when she abandons that metaphorical flame (and for an extra level of oho – her flame was the Holy See, the Holy See is essentially a church built around IoE and Griffith and of course Griffith is the inferno, yada yada).

Anyway so like, I don’t think it’s... psychologically accurate, but I do think it’s appropriate in the context of fiction, because fiction is a metaphor for life not an actual recreation of it, so in that sense its not uncommon for major life changes to happen as the result of an epiphanic moment. I feel like if this series were about Farnese you’d see her struggle with it more but as a secondary supporting character you don’t.

Miura talked about how he approached Guts vs apostles (and by extension pseudo apostles who honestly are even more innocent), and one of the things he said was that as the monsters grow closer to death their humanity comes out while Guts becomes more monstrous. And there is a catharsis in that moment where Guts’s monstrousness surpasses that of the monsters he’s killing. And ever since I read that, I’ve been thinking about it, and especially in stories like these because like...

Mozgus himself is what I’d call a fairly obvious villain right, like there’s no mistaking him for anything else despite his having what I would consider a genuine heaping dose of nuance. He’s basically a media portrayal of an inquisition priest – he believes in what he does and believes he is doing good, yet what he does is absolutely horrifying. That makes him an interesting character to me – honestly much more interesting than I’d remembered before I undertook this reread – but hes still basically a dick, I mean he’s too excited about torture to be anything else.

Where the grey morality really hits, though, is in his followers – his apostles I daresay lol. Because these are people who were ostracized and tormented by humanity – regarded as freaks and monsters – who found a purpose and hope through meeting this person who treated them as humans and brought them into the metaphorical light.

And the cruelty of the way Guts treats them – while not unjustified because they are in fact attacking him – is even so highlighted by things like...

The childlike face of this guy...

Who cries as  he kills them. Or

The horribly mutilated corpses Guts leaves behind, or...

The soft humanity in the eyes of the bird-beaked one as he dies – notably the one we have the greatest connection to via Farnese having spoken to him and heard his story.

And again, it’s not like you can really condemn Guts for this – he’s trying to save Casca, and he’s defending himself, and they attacked him right? But at the same time, as @zombiesgohome just said as I’m typing this, you can totally see how Guts is the villain from their perspective. Which, of course, is what Miura suggested, too.

Meanwhile...

All hell breaks loose.

13. I’ve always found the implications that having two branded people in the same area kind of kickstarts all this destruction – and also contributes to Griffith’s return – interesting. Because Guts really... chooses to do that, right? He could have let Casca burn, but he didn’t. The Behelit Apostle notes that everything that happens contributes to that basically – even Luca accidentally contributed by bringing Casca there to begin with, and of course the jelly spirits are explicitly part of both the reincarnation and a side effect of Guts and Casca’s presence in the same general area.

Like I wonder what would have happened if Guts chose to let Casca die so that Griffith couldn’t come back. Would it happen anyway? I think the real answer is “Guts wouldn’t do that so it doesn’t matter” – that’s the real answer to most of these issues with “what would happen if destiny didn’t happen.”

But it’s interesting food for thought, like doesn’t that imply that Guts surviving really was part of the cosmic plan? That his refusal to bow to fate is part of Fate’s plan?

Chewy brain food, but in the meantime....

The wheel of fate keeps turning.

That’s where I’ll leave it I guess. This was a bit of a heavy one more in terms of my processing power (brainwise) than anything else, but....

Next up...CHAOS CHAOS CHAOS.

[kenobster]

People really can’t tell the difference anymore between ultra literal canon character analysis and people analyzing characters they love through the lenses of their own lives and people making jokes. Everything is taken sooo so literally and everyone just attacks if it doesn’t align with what they think. I’m sorry people are being rude to you. Eldest daughter Obi-Wan for life.

luckily no one is being mean to me (yet), I've just been seing some posts that make me see red, and I had to let off some steam. but thank you, anon!!! <3

anyway, fuck yeah, Eldest daughter Obi-Wan for life!!!!

You're so right about like how people no longer can see the divide between serious character analysis and silly stress-unwinding jokes. Like, I am of the mind that we all came here to let loose after work and take our bras/binders off and slouch around in our PJs. And now they're telling me I'm not allowed to make jokes about Obi-Wan being a mastermommy anymore? 🥺Pfft. Good luck with that lmfao.

It's also funny because the tags on one specific post I'm thinking of talk about how fandom loves to "gender-role" the shit out of Obi-Wan in super "misogynist" ways... and I'm okay, well, why don't we talk about the fact that people make him dualsex, often for no reason other than they want to put a penis in a feminine man's vagina instead of a bisexual man's anus? Like, what about that, huh?

I mean I'm not gonna rain on anyone's Stewjoni parade, but I'm just saying if someone's gonna complain about Eldest Daughters being misogynist for discussing their feelings via a blorbo, then I kinda expect that person to not ignore other popular misogynist/queerphobic headcanons sweeping through the continent lmao