#louis baby you need therapy

[machonnes]

INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE (2022-) 1.07 | The Thing Lay Still

[1dcommunityficrecs]

Rec List: Sports Fics!

Hope everyone has been enjoying the Olympics -- I know I have! There have been amazing performances, emotional records, hilarious memes -- it's truly a unique human experience of community and celebration and accomplishment.

Inspired by that theme, here are some more unique human experiences -- eleven of them! Ranging from under 2000 words to over 100,000 words, fics posted a decade ago (holy smokes) to fics posted just this year, pieces that I know so well they live in my bloodstream to ones I've never heard of and can't wait to try, and even including a rare pair, there's lots of variety as usual, so dig in!

Oh Glory by alivingfire (21027, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) – fic post

This fic follows Harry, a swimmer, and Louis, a gymnast, at the Olympics.

Reccer says: I love the sense of time and place it evokes.

don't have to go to the pool by Kingsoftheimpossible (12245, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry is new to the swim team, Louis is the captain.

Reccer says: This is an absolutely sexy , adorable, efficient, serotonin-boosting fic.

Whirlwind by Dolce_piccante (21311, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

AU. Acclaimed actor, Hollywood heartthrob, and Oscar nominee, Harry Styles, seems to have the world at his feet, but seeks out an old friend when he needs a date for his big night

Reccer says: It's dolce, so it's sexy, it's funny and there is pining.

The Sidelines by RedRidingStiles (47078, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry and Louis play hockey for Penn state and can't stand one another, since they can't keep their hatred off the ice their coach and team do what they can to keep their hard earned spot in the playoffs and their two star players from killing each other

Reccer says: The enemies to lovers is done really well, and they're both stupid. It's the perfect combination of interesting plot, comedy, and smut.

Baby Just Dive Right In (Follow My Lead) by LiveLaughLoveLarry (1686, Teen, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) – fic post

Louis and Harry are partners in synchronized diving. Also in life. They're not intentionally hiding their relationship, but somehow no one seems to pick up on their blatant hints.

Reccer says: It's so funny watching everyone brush off the most unplatonic things as just bros and friends and teammates. Like, I know it's contrived for the sake of the story, but also... it's not that far of a reach!

Get Your Head in the Game by tuxlouis (2007, General, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry is on a blind date to a basketball game, and the guy he's supposed to be going with is a TERRIBLE date. Fortunately the cute guy sitting on the other side is a much better conversationalist -- and kisser.

Reccer says: Very sweet, very cute, very funny. Harry's original date is such a hot mess it's hysterical, and Louis is such a little shit but that's what I love about him.

Addicted To Your Fix by sunshinebombx (6312, Teen, Liam Payne/Harry Styles)

Liam injures his shoulder shortly before the French Open. He needs to get back in fighting shape, so he's set up with some yoga therapy. It's very motivating how much he enjoys watching Harry do a downward dog.

Reccer says: Harry's flirting is adorable, and Liam's complete obliviousness to the fact that it's genuine is hilarious. I also love the side-plot about how the media is convinced that Niall and Liam are bitter rivals instead of close friends who get that in sports sometimes you win and sometimes you lose and it's not personal.

Glass Closets and Greenhouses by TiredTiredTz (60933, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) – fic post

Charlton Athletic defender Louis Tomlinson and worldwide sex symbol Harry Styles are rumoured to be hooking up after a viral video filmed at Harry’s Wembley show was posted online by Tommo’s twin sisters.

Reccer says: This is such a great fic! Sweet, sweet meet-cute, witty banter, and actual Tommo-on-the-pitch scenes!

When the Lights Go Out by thelarenttrap (79269, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) – fic post Warnings: Car Crashes

Formula 1 racing drivers Harry and Louis have a history: as childhood competitors, to teammates, to enemies, to eventually lovers.

Hold My Breath by Zarah5 (19749, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Louis is a footballer. Harry is a yoga teacher. Louis doesn't expect to like yoga, doesn't want to like yoga, but... Harry has a way of making it seem not that bad.

Reccer says: Because it's Zarah5 and with her nothing can be anything but fantastic.

Into The Blue by Zarah5 (117218, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Louis is Harry's diving instructor

Reccer says: I honestly think this fic is a classic. A must read. Not to mention it would be a sin

[darkinfinity]

Hi, happy 28th! I decided to join the 28th appreciation, so here are all the fics I read and enjoyed in the past month! Fics are organised by word count :)

🌷Tell me it's the strongest shape by @louandhazaf (E, multi, 73k)

Nick and Elgar have it all. They’re famous, successful, and engaged to be married—and sometimes they play with others.

When uni student Louis gets street cast by Elgar for a GQ photoshoot, he's drawn into Nick and Elgar’s complicated relationship.

They've always invited mates into their bed. It doesn’t ever mean anything. Until… it does.

🌷A crown of heartache by WordsInBloom28 (E, 70k)

The Royal Tail: an alpha den, a strip club, a place where secrets are concealed and consent is medicated. It’s also the place Harry has been trapped for the last three years.

Through luck or fate, Harry finds his way to Louis, a kind alpha who offers safety and comfort. After being freed from the confines of the den, Harry struggles to shake the darkness from his past.

He has a choice to make. Live in a mental prison of his own making or find the strength within himself to face his demons head on with Louis at his side.

🌷In the still of the night by @jacaranda-bloom (E, 68k)

In a society where omegas are expected to follow a predetermined path, Louis strives for more; for his voice to be heard, for recognition, for true love.

In a world where your past defines your future, Harry fights against the system; for equality, for a different life, for acceptance.

When their two worlds collide, will they be beaten down by conformity or will they rise up and forge a new path together?

OR the Dirty Dancing AU where Louis is a feisty omega who wants to change the world, Harry is an alpha from the wrong side of the tracks, and nobody puts Louis in a corner.

🌷Chasing, searching, dreaming by @parmahamlarrie (E, 46k)

Everyone is chasing, searching, dreaming of their soulmate.

Harry has known who his soulmate is since he was twenty years old, and ever since, he has been waiting for Louis to be ready for him. The unexpected passing of Louis' mum, and the fact that now he is the guardian of his twin two-year-old little siblings, just means that Harry is going to have to wait a bit longer.

A soulmate AU full of cute kids, house building, therapy, and a lot of dreaming.

🌷Four, five, finished? by @beanno28 & @lalalaartje (E, multi, 45k)

Now that they've all settled down in their relationship dynamic, Zayn, Harry and Louis agree it's time for the next step. A new phase in their lives, so to speak. They're having a baby! Or well. That's the plan. As usual for the three of them, nothing goes as planned.

Adjustments have to be made, emotions have to be lived through and discussed and all in all, our three boys need to buckle up for the ride and hope to reach their final destination without major figurative car crashes.

🌷A hopeless connection by @parmahamlarrie (E, 34k)

In a world where everyone has a soulmate, what do you do when you don’t have one?

As soon as Louis Tomlinson was born, his Timer, the one that determined when he would meet his soulmate, was already at zero. He’s spent the last twenty-five years of his life looking for that void to be filled with faceless strangers. Can he still find love?

🌷Santa baby honey by @sadaveniren (E, 29k)

“Let’s cut right to the chase,” Niall said, loading the powerpoint, which was just one page, comprised of Louis’ face and the words How do you solve a problem like this asshole? “It’s the beginning of November and Louis is already being a fuckwit. How are we gonna have him knock that shit off this year?”

aka Louis is the CEO of a toy company and Christmas is a stressful time of year so his assistant decides the best way to make him chill out is by getting him laid through a Secret Santa

🌷Thespian sweetheart by orchidsinnewyork (16k)

Harry definitely was not. He’d stopped listening.

Across the room, someone had caught his eye. 

The stranger’s light brown hair fell into wisps, framing his mask. His cheekbones could be seen even with half his face covered, and his slender fingers were brushing along the buttons of his coat. He was smiling even though he had no one in company. He seemed to glow as he stood under a chandelier, the fragments of glass reflecting bursts of light onto his frame.

Harry had never seen someone like that before. He’d been staring for too long, completely ignoring Count Paris as his gaze focused on the stranger. And he hadn’t realised it until the stranger turned his head, and their eyes met.

Harry saw his lips part, and curled into a small smile as he removed his mask. Staring back at Harry were a pair of brilliant blue eyes, twinkling at him like twin stars. The stranger winked at him, and his head felt giddy. 

~

Uni AU where Harry participates in a Theatre production, and is supposed to perform a stage kiss that winds up becoming quite real. Featuring awkward encounters, insane dreams, OT5 and peanut butter.

🌷I'll look after you by @elmeiko88 (M, 15k)

I mean, when Harry inherited his late uncle's hybrid, he didn't necessarily expect this...

Where Louis is a nice hybrid cat who's never lived with anyone but an old man, and who discovers the freedom of living with Harry...

🌷I dig your cinema by @silverstuff50 (E, 13k)

It wasn’t that Louis didn’t want to see Harry’s latest film; it was a tragically pathetic fact that Louis had watched every single show and film, every interview, every red carpet that Harry had done since his ex-boyfriend had decided to leave Uni in the second year and pursue an acting career.

It's just that he wanted to watch it on his own, in his flat, with a soft blanket, beer, ice cream, and a large box of tissues.

🌷licking sugar off taboos, we pour wild honey and wine over the walls by @larentslovebot (E, 10k)

Louis Tomlinson is a big name in the industry. A lyrical mastermind, who does not appear in public and dedicates his existence to music. Deciding to find aspiring musicians for his label, he expected to tutor young talents and make them the next heads of show business. What he didn't expect was to meet Harry Styles, omega with attitude and a captivating scent.

🌷Woke up feeling knotty by @jaerie (E, 8k)

Beta Louis has a kink for knotting and the secret aesthetic porn blog he runs about it is more than proof. When he accidentally finds out his alpha best friend Harry is one of his biggest fans, he knows he has to come clean after everything that has already happened between them. Harry just might be willing to help him out anyway.

🌷I'll keep you warm by @parmahamlarrie (T, 6k)

Louis is the kind of guy who keeps his head down and minds his own business. He’s lived on the same street for years and barely would recognize the buildings, let alone his neighbours. That’s all about to change however, due to a broken key and an unexpected snow storm.

🌷Pretty and preposterous by @brightlyharry (5k)

Harry donates a copy of Pride and Prejudice to his little free library. He never expects what comes next.

🌷What the silence said by @larrysballetslippers (E, 3k)

“Our lives were just beginning, our favourite moment was right now, our favourite songs were unwritten. ‘Love is a mixtape’, Rob Sheffield.”

Or, Louis has tried to ask Harry, the quiet and cute librarian at his local library, out for some time. He never expected that quoting Harry's favourite books work so well for him. A very silent Valentine's day fic.

[cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut]

Writing is hard at the moment (burnout is no joke 😩) so I’ve made a shiny new banner and am sharing today from the very first Tarlos fic I ever wrote - Nightmares In Tandem.

“Baby,” TK whispered. He cleared his throat, almost nervous to be saying it. “I’m talking about both of us getting therapy. You went through a trauma, Carlos. You went through it, and if I can’t get over how…how terrified I was, of losing you, of thinking about what you might have been going through? I think it would be good to talk to someone.”

“If you need that,” said Carlos, “then you should go for it. I just…I’m not sure it would help me. I think I can do this on my own. On my own with you, I mean. I think that’s all I need, TK.”

“What about the nightmares?” TK asked, and it was hard not to regret bringing it up when he saw the way Carlos’s face changed, looked stunned and almost haunted. TK’s stomach twisted, nausea rising right up into his throat, but he swallowed it down, stroked a hand through Carlos’s hair, even as Carlos flicked his eyes away from him.

In the daylight, things were bright and soft and TK saw a way back from all of this. In the night, though? In the night, TK lay awake until he heard Carlos’s breathing change, knew he was safely asleep. He fell asleep second and he woke up first, to sounds of Carlos mumbling, or whimpering, his face twisted into an expression of pain, of terror. He’d touch his shoulder to wake him softly, and Carlos would sit bolt upright, terrified and lost until the nightmare ebbed away and he understood—knew it was only TK, knew this was only their bed, would cry himself softly back to sleep in TK’s arms as TK whispered, just as Carlos had done for him in the past, that no one was going to hurt him.

“You’re safe here,” TK would whisper, pressing kisses into Carlos’s messy hair. “You’re so safe here, baby.”

Open tag to all who wanna play 💛 Plus no pressure tags below.

Thank you for the tags from @honeybee-taskforce @tellmegoodbye @tommy-kinard-buckley @heartstringsduet @paperstorm

@bonheur-cafe @lemonlyman-dotcom @carlos-in-glasses @strandnreyes @whatsintheboxmh

@reyesstrand and @orchidscript

No pressure tags to @birdclowns @alrightbuckaroo @ambiguouspenny @cafeshopau @carlos-tk

@catanisspicy @decafdino @detective-giggles @emsprovisions @eclectic-sassycoweyes

@fitzherbertssmolder @freneticfloetry @goodways @herefortarlos @irispurpurea

@inkweedandlizards @jesuisici33 @literateowl @lightningboltreader @louis-ii-reyes-strand

@liminalmemories21 @mooshkat @nancys-braids @noxsoulmate @rmd-writes

@reasonandfaithinharmony @sanjuwrites @sugdenlovesdingle @safeaswrites @three-drink-amy

@theghostofashton @thebumblecee @thisbuildinghasfeelings @welcometololaland

[raya-rhaenyra-ahsoka]

My thoughts on Ep.5 - A God Buys Us Cheeseburgers, A rant (Spoilers Ahead!)

First of all, the chaos with what happened in the Arch was expected, but Annabeth seeing the Fates was not expected.

Annabeth insisting that Percy is alive, and went to find him near the water.

Percy casually greeting them hi. Like he wasn’t stung by the Chimera and fell off the St. Louis Arch. This will never be not funny.

Annabeth rushing to hug Percy and didn’t even care that he was soaked.

Me, internally: PERCABETH! PERCABETH! PERCABETH! 😍🎉

Percy just now realizing that a god could not have stolen the master bolt and might have been helped by someone. Grover and Annabeth looking at him like, seriously?

This convo:

Percy: Why are you being weird with me again? I thought we’re not doing that anymore.

Annabeth: I’m not being weird.

Percy: Yes, you are. You’ve been weird since we left the Arch.

Again, that’s their relationship.

Percy assuming it’s because of the hug. And Annabeth being like, No idiot I saw the Fates! Percy, honey, you’re the one being weird about it.

At this point, Imma give Grover some popcorn while he watches them argue.

Biker Ares casually asking 3 kids if they need help. Definitely not sus.

Percy, Annabeth, and Grover hiding behind the road barrier like, uh, no, we’re good. Idk, but that’s funny to me.

Ares snorting and saying they’re behind schedule and offering to help his little cousin.

Ares immediately recognizing Annabeth as Athena’s kid. Ares being like, Omfg she sounds just like my sister. That’s definitely her kid.

So a biker offering to help 3 minors in the middle of nowhere and offering them food. In other people’s perspective, that’s definitely sus.

Ares being a Twitter Troll is something I never knew I need.

Percy and Annabeth being so unimpressed with Ares was so funny. Like, so this is the god of war? Really?

Gabe painting Percy as a fugitive, and Percy being pissed about it. Not surprised.

Ares being pumped that there’s a war coming.

Percy and Annabeth fucking ready to fight Ares, and Grover’s just there like, let’s all calm down.

You left your sheild? Like, forgot it on a merry-go-round? Girl, you’re talking to a god.

Negotiating with Ares 101:

Ares: Okay, the satyr stays here while you two get my shield.

Percy and Annabeth: No!

Grover: Okay, sure.

Percy and Annabeth: wtf

The Waterland giving off steampunk/horror movie vibes is something I’m here for.

Percy making plans to take Annabeth to see a movie in the middle of their death quest just because she admitted to never having seen one is just so sweet. PERCABETH!😍

Annabeth being fascinated by Hephaestus’ engineering.

Grover’s therapy session with Ares to get more info is also something I never knew I needed.

The f*cking Thrill Ride O’ Love! IT’S HAPPENING!

Book fans rn:

Annabeth: Don’t you even try to tell me not to be weird about this.

Percy: I didn’t say anything.

Annabeth: I can feel you thinking it.

Oh, my babies. PERCABETH! 😍

Percy calling the Thrill Ride O’ Love a ghost ride is something I agree on.

The awkward silence while they ride the rowboat though, and then suddenly you hear, WHAT IS LOVE? BABY DON’T HURT ME... That shit cracked me up.

The light projections in the tunnel telling Hephaestus’ story.

The ride turning into a horror boat ride to a whitewater rafting ride was so unexpected. I’d pay to see that kind of boat ride rather than an actual tunnel-of-love ride.

Them having to jump and Percy unknowingly pulling Annabeth to safety with his water superpowers. He’s a waterbender and he doesn’t know it. LOL

Ares, the literal god of war, just ranting off to a random satyr he found in the middle of nowhere about his overachiever sister and her feathered pet will never be not funny.

Annabeth not hesitating to sit on the chair, and Percy stopping her.

SEAWEED BRAIN! SEAWEED BRAIN! SEAWEED BRAIN! SHE SAID THE THING! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!

Book fans:

[Spoiler] To non-book-readers, that's her nickname for him.

Percabeth arguing about a life/death decision. This is their relationship.

Percy giving Annabeth Riptide. He trusts her. Aww. 😍

Percy having to sit on the chair, while Annabeth gets the shield.

Annabeth nearly backing out at the last second, while Percy assures her that he’s okay while trying not to cry.

Annabeth ignoring the shield then immediately and desperately tries to free Percy.

Annabeth bargaining with Hephaestus. Maybe, I was that way once, but I don’t wanna be that way anymore. I won’t be like all of you.

Hephaestus releasing Percy was definitely his way of saying, Girl, same. You’re a good kid. Imma make sure you’re Mom knows that.

THIS PIC! THIS IS HISTORICAL RIGHT HERE! GO BACK TO THIS POST AFTER THIS SHOW HAS SEVERAL SEASONS AND MOUNT ST. HELENS ERUPTS. *wink-wink

Percy and Annabeth going back to the diner with the shield casually, and then like, we got your shield, now where tf is our ride?

Ares’ ride: The Kindness Internation truck a.k.a. illegal animals smuggling van.

Thank you for the emotional abuse and the cheeseburgers and the ride! ~ Grover Underwood. Iconic!

Grover telling Percy and Annabeth about his therapy session with Ares: I know who stole the master bolt!

Of course, it’s a cliffhanger. But nothing will beat the HoO:MoA one.

Bruh, the amount of Percabeth content in this episode is just *chef’s kiss*. It’s all coming together. I can’t even fathom how much of an emotional rollercoaster I was watching this episode. It just keeps getting better and better! 😍

[hsdiaries]

‘til forever

chapter one - 3.3k

master list

I used to judged my therapists, based on how their offices were decorated. Plants and warm tones meant they were safe and understanding. Clean lines and modern furniture meant they were there for just a paycheck. Obviously, this wasn't a set in stone fact, but the concept and idea worked in my mind. It worked as a way to avoid therapy for months - until I walked into Jackie's office. Rugs and pleasing mixed patterns, scattered green plants and mix matched thrifted furniture. Her office screamed care and compassion, so I couldn't walk away any longer. I no longer had a valid excuse other than I was scared to deal with everything. I was scared to deal with the fact, Louis was dead.

"You know, if I close my eyes, that night plays back in my memory like a nightmare I can't escape. I remember the look on Niall's face when he came to our house to let me know what had happened. He didn't even have to say anything for me to know something was wrong. His eyes" I paused, swallowing, inhaling sharply, "His eyes were blank, as if no words or emotion could describe what he was feeling at the moment - like there wasn't a feeling known to us that could describe the ache he was carrying in his heart."

"Are you still close with, Niall?" Jackie asked, sipping tea from a giant orange mug, definitely meant for noodles and not tea.

"Yes. He's the only one of our friends I still talk to." I said, fiddling with the hole on my jeans, the threads barely hanging on. These light washed pair of jeans were as old as my relationship with Louis had been and carried the same amount of wear and tear that our relationship had developed over its four year time span.

"Did you two heal together then?" She asked, and I nodded, palms running down the tops of my thighs.

"In a way...we used to talk about it, a lot. But, neither of us dealt with it professionally. I think we held on to the idea that - as long as we talked about what happened over and over, it would eventually not hurt. Or be easy to process. But, obviously I'm here so," I shrugged, licking my lips, cracking a small smile to break any awkwardness I seemed to always create.

"Well I'm glad you came here. I think loss always hurts, we just get it to a place that's bearable." She smiled as a small beep was heard, signifying our hour was up, "Same time next week?"

I pressed my lips tightly, nodding, "Yeah,"

"See you then Bentley." She smiled as we both stood, walking out of her small office. 

In the waiting room was Niall, his brows furrowed as he worked through the next puzzle in his crossword puzzle book, glasses barely hanging onto the bridge of his nose. His eyes flickered up momentarily, his face softening the instant we locked eyes.

"Ben, all done talking about your feelings?" He teased, pushing his glasses on the top of his head. Niall hated the idea of therapy, and speaking to a person who, in his own words, just wrote down your feelings to paraphrase them back to you and pretend they are giving meaning to them. I wouldn't say I completely disagreed with him, but sometimes, that's what I thought a human needed. Someone to sort out their feelings and explain it right back to them.

Though, I wasn't really sure anyone could explain my feelings back to me. I wasn't exactly sure how someone could bring any justification to the fact that Louis wasn't here anymore. How could anyone truly make me understand the reason why he couldn't walk home safely. Understand why someone would pull a gun on him, and shoot him. Once in the chest, and twice in the head.

All I understood was, the man who murdered him wanted to make sure he was successful. 

It had only been six months since that night in November, our final phone call playing constantly in my head.

-

Thanksgiving Night

"Baby, there aren't any fresh cranberries left. But I promise, I can make the canned one taste just as great," Louis puffed over the phone, the hustle of the store could be heard in the background.

"Louis, this is why I asked you to get them earlier this week. Canned doesn't taste the same. It's never going to fool anyone," I said, basting the turkey one final time before closing the oven.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry. You're right, B. I should have gone when you asked. Look, I'll try that overpriced shop on the corner before the house, okay? If not, I swear, no one will know the difference." He cooed over the phone, trying to soften me up, and of course it worked.

I took a deep breath, realizing I was being too much, on the day I should be most thankful for what I have, "No baby. You know what, just come home-"

"-No, B, I screwed up. I'm going to make it better. That's what I do, remember?" He said, and I could hear his smile through the phone, soon reflecting on my face as well.

"You do make everything better, sweet boy. Okay. Um, call Niall while you're at it? He's almost here and maybe you two can meet up. I know he was walking over with two casserole trays and I love him but-.."

"..-he's the clumsiest ever?" Louis chuckled, making me laugh.

"Yes."

"Alright, I'll be there soon. I love you, B."

"I love you too, sweet boy."

Niall never met up with him. He heard it all happen over the phone. By the time he found him, Louis was already dead.

-

"So you still want to grab an early dinner?" Niall said, his arm moving around my shoulders, crossword book stuck under his arm, pencil behind his ear. He looked so sharp, pressed shirt, soft sweater over it. I loved how he always smelled so clean, a twinge of apricot always seemed to mix into the smell of fresh sheets on his skin.

"Ummm, as long as it's Rizzo's, then yes. I'm in need of a giant pastrami sammy." I smiled up at him, as always, counting the dark flecks of blue that filled his crystal seas.

"Ben wants pastrami, Ben gets pastrami. Come on then," he smiled, leading me out of the office.

Niall had been Louis's best friend since middle school when Louis moved to the states from London. They hated each other on Louis's first day and by the second day they were inseparable. In my mind, that's why he stuck around, never letting me push him away like I had with Mitch, Pauli and everyone else. In my mind, he stuck around because he felt like he owed it to Louis.

He was my best friend now. The reality of it being, he was my only friend. When I isolated myself from everyone, he waited outside my bubble until he realized he needed to pop it and save me from myself. 

My mother had other ideas, constantly alluding to the idea that Niall and I were meant to be together. That the universe knew we needed each other, bonding us for life.

Personally I hated when she made that statement, making me constantly feel like Louis had died for a reason. That reason being Niall and I being together. It was disgusting and made my heart ache in ways I couldn't even describe.

As we entered Rizzo's, I pushed free of Niall gently, walking over to the picture of Louis on the wall from when he won their Massive Sub Eating challenge, kissing my fingers and pressing them against his framed face. He looked handsome as ever, straight hairs on his forehead, facial hair adorned with mustard or marinara, I couldn't remember anymore.

"Miss you babe." I whispered, turning to face the kitchen as loud banging could be heard from the back. A couple dishes could be seen flying up through the order window.

"Holy anchovies, what did I do now!" I heard Linda exclaim from the other side, Niall and I looking at each other and snickering. Linda was the owner of Rizzo's, inherited from and named after her grandfather, Rizzo Manger.

"You alright back there Linds?" I called out as I approached the breakfast bar.

"Is that my Benny girl! Did you bring the leprechaun with you? Clearly I need some luck on my side." She said, her face finally popping up in the order window. Her voice always sounded like she had smoked one pack too many, though she never had a day in her life.

"You know, most Irish people would have sued you for discrimination or something of the sort for that kind of name calling!" Niall teased, Linda shrugging.

"Thankfully you love my subs way too much to even think about that, right?" She chuckled, making Niall roll his eyes as we took our usual seats at the breakfast bar. My eyes looked down at the carving of our initials, 

"L + B + N = 2KFS"

I traced over it with my fingers laughing a bit. Niall looked over, leaning in close to me, "Too cool for school-we were such idiots." He laughed a bit, his finger moving to trace over the end my finger wasn't until they met in the middle. His face so close to mine, I could smell his aftershave even stronger than before.

"New shampoo?" He said, moving back to his seat, looking over the menu as if he didn't already know what he was going to order.

"Huh?" I said, leaning on my hand and raising an eyebrow.

"Your hair smells different today." He muttered, glancing over slightly. Before I could answer, Linda walked over to us, order pad in hand.

"What can I get you two?" She says, already writing our order down without us even answering.

"Steak, rare, with lots of carrots on the side," I tease, Niall joining in shortly after.

"I'll take a burger, just the lettuce and tomato please."

"You both think you're great comedians don't you? One pastrami sam, one mari sub, and two large cokes coming right up." She winked before walking away.

"So, Mitch got a new girlfriend." Niall said, turning in his stool to face me completely.

"Oh, that's nice," I smiled a bit, moving my gaze back down to my phone. I clicked the home screen showing no missed notifications, Niall being the only person who ever sent me anything.

"He asked if we wanted to meet up with them, Chase and Pauli. Get some beers and play pool tonight," I turned to face him, his baby blues filled with so much hope.

"Mmm, I have to organize my pantry. Tomorrow is grocery day, so I have to make sure of what I need and that there is room for new things." I said, pushing hair behind my ear.

"Ben...your pantry?" He said, his face filled with disbelief at my excuse.

"Niall, just...no, okay? You go. Don't push your friends away for me. Go hang out with them, come back and tell me all about Mitch's girl." I smiled, trying to reassure him as much as I possibly could.

"They are your friends too, you know?" He said gently, knowing it was a touchy subject for me.

"Niall. Please." I swallowed, looking back down at my phone, unlocking it and aimlessly scrolling on social media.

"I'm just saying Ben, it's been six months. They gave you the space you obviously needed, but...you need friends Bentley. And they miss you."

"I have friends. I have you. And Linda. And Pug. Pug is the best listener too." I said, pulling out a photo of my corgi making Niall have to attempt to hold back his smile.

"You are...," shaking his head while rolling his eyes, he reached over, pulling me tightly against him. He pressed his lips into the top of my head, making me relax into him.

I couldn't begin to explain how grateful I was for Niall. The way he had stepped up these past six months for me, was everything. We were bonded in this traumatic experience and no matter how hard I tried, he never allowed me to push him away.

During that first week, he wouldn't leave me alone. He was over everyday, even if I didn't want him here. Using the spare key Louis gave him, he would march in, make sure I was fed, bathed and resting. If I asked to be alone, he would leave me in my bedroom while he remained in the living room. He kept my home tidy, stocking it with everything I may need.

Eventually I joined him in the living room. Eventually we talked about Louis. Eventually he made me laugh again. It was like he was finding ways to streamline my pain into other things, reminding me that I had to continue to live.

Because it was what Louis would have wanted.

He couldn't make me hang out with our old friends, that was the only thing he failed at. It wasn't that I didn't miss them; it was simply that I didn't want to have to speak about Louis. I didn't want to rehash emotions with each one of them individually. I had that with Niall, that's all I needed and all I could handle. Maybe it was selfish of me, maybe it made me lack compassion; but it was all I could handle right now.

Linda brought us our food, each of us digging in, and I was grateful when Niall didn't bring it up again. Instead, we talked about Harry Potter. It was the first time he was watching the series, having just sat down with me through the first and second. I explained to him the differences between the book and the movie, small pouts when he wished that they would have kept certain things in. We argued about him being a Gryffindor, me emphasizing that he was too much of a Golden Retriever to be a Gryffindor. He glared at me, throwing chips at me making me cackle.

"You are clearly a Hufflepuff and that's okay. Personally I think they are the underrated house at Hogwarts." I shrugged, dusting away the chip crumbs.

"So you think I'm underrated? That my amazingness isn't valued at its true potential?" He wiggled his eyebrows, making me reach over and shove him.

"Niall James, be quiet." I laughed, his hand catching my arm and pulling me just a bit closer to him.

"Facts are facts, Bentley Rose and I know you only speak truths." He titled his head slightly, his smile big, then soft as he took in my face.

I wasn't an idiot. I was aware of the certain heat that rose between the two of us at times. The sparks that searched for enough friction to try and burst into flames. I was also aware it was all bonded through trauma. Which wasn't healthy. Which wasn't what I wanted nor needed.

Above all, I couldn't handle loving after Louis, another reason I pushed everyone out.

I cleared my throat pulling back, "We should go so you're not late. You're going tonight and I don't want any excuses!" I said pointing my finger at him, making him laugh.

"I wouldn't dream of it," he rolled his eyes. We finished, paying the check and walking outside to the warm summer air, my eyes closing at the pleasant feel of it.

"So you are absolutely sure?" He asked, grabbing my waist gently, pulling me slightly towards him.

"I just don't want to deal with all the, 'How are you really doing?' and hearing how much people miss Louis. I know it's selfish...I just..."

"I get it, Ben, you're fine," he pulled me closer, our hips pressing together, "You have your mace? Taser?"

"Check and check, location is on, and I will text you when I get home," I smiled, my hand pushing back his thick mousy brown hair.

"Okay, you know I care for ya?"

"I know, I care for you too," I smiled, kissing his cheek, before pushing away from him softly, "Have fun, be safe...get laid?" I giggled, shrugging my shoulders as I backed away, turning around and heading home.

Walking down the familiar path, I reached into my purse, pulling out my keys and placing one between my fingers. I hated that my mind was always set to the defense, but after Louis being murdered the way he was, I wasn't taking my chances. I never wore headphones, I paid attention to the footsteps that surrounded my own, their pace, their distance.

And that's why I was in therapy.

I moved down the street, like clockwork, my heart started beating faster as I approached the block before the expensive store on the corner. I stopped, normally turning right on Baker St. and taking the long way around to get home. It was so unnecessary, but I couldn't get past the idea of picturing how it happened. It had been described to me from so many different angles during the investigation, I couldn't help but feel like I would enter a movie scene I couldn't escape if I walked past the store.

And that's why I was in therapy.

I chewed on my lower lip, looking down the street, my feet moving forward before I realized what I had just decided. Before I realized that for some reason, I felt brave tonight, moving closer and closer to the shop. I stopped at the window, the shop name etched into the glass in a beautiful gold.

"Posh Finery"

Taking a deep breath, I moved inside quickly, heading to the little cafe in the corner. I pinched my lip as I looked over the pastries for sale. They had some prepackaged and ready to go, while others were meant to be picked out from behind the glass display. I spotted the last chocolate croissant, pairing it with an iced matcha seemed like the perfect way to end my night. I moved to reach for the chocolate croissant, a tattooed hand reaching at the same time. I jumped back slightly, bringing my hand quickly to my chest.

"Sorry, sorry. You can have it," I pressed my lips tight into a smile.

"No drama, kid. Take it," I heard the tattooed hand say before my eyes traveled up to take in the rest of him. I felt my eyes widen, not in shock from his appearance, olive skin, long hair, piercing green eyes that sat under furrowed brows; but by his use of a phrase I had only ever heard come from Louis' mouth.

"Excuse me? What did you say?" I stood straight, taking in his eyes as he raised a small eyebrow and chuckled a bit.

"It's means no worr-..."

"...-no I know what it means, I've just...sorry. I um, I only ever head one person use that phrase and it caught me off guard," I exhaled, my cheeks burning as I quickly grabbed a bear claw, "You can have the croissant. These are just as good anyways." I smiled, walking past him to the cashier.

"Thanks," he called out, and I turned over my shoulder nodding a bit. I ordered my matcha, handing them the bear claw to be heated up. After paying I walked over and sat at a table, waiting for my drink, watching the man pay for the croissant. He glanced over at me, holding it up and giving me a small nod before making his way out the door.

As he moved past, I couldn't help but envision Louis walking out in the same manner. Fresh cranberries in hand, making the quick turn before heading up to our home. I swallowed, shaking the thought from my head. 

It never happened. He never even made it in the store.

[alexreadssomeshit]

Mostly Sherliam headcanons.. but yeah!

Headcanons

William likes to look at Sherlock cook and gives him back hugs

They got married and their children are the best type of entertainment

Sherlock for fun just stops by at Liam's University and sits in his class

Liam plays along with Sherlock when he does that, when Sherlock raises he's hand to answer something, Liam ignores him

After classes they meet up saying that it's 'work stuff' when it's a date

They make it so obvious when they were dating

Liam is a cat. He's just cat and when he sleeps on Sherlock's shoulder he doesn't move

Sherlock cleans everything and does he's best to be the best husband and father to his family

Family gatherings are awkward af-

One of their kids is basically Louis and Liam cries about it sometimes

The never ending cuddles

Movie night goes like

Liam - trys to stay awake but is to tried

Sherly - the classic 'does everyone have snacks' kinda guy

Louis - thinking of ways to kill Sherlock

Albert - still drunk (this man needs therapy)

Moneypenny - "when will this finish?" Just worried about everyone

Jack - clams down moneypenny

Sebastian - currently yelling at the guy as if he could hear him

Bond - stealing Sebastian's booze for fun

Fread - "I'm just a baby" gets treated like a baby

John - "why are we watching a scary movie? Guys?"

Ms. Hutson - "it's okay John"

Sometimes for fun Liam and Sherlock go to libraries, Liam reading and Sherlock wanting to read with him

Ms. Hutson likes bake things and literally everyone enjoys her cooking.

Moneypenny and Ms. Hutson get along so well

Jack just gives Fred really good life advice

Louis is the favorite uncle, the kids love he's cooking more than their dads (don't tell Sherlock and William)

Albert best drunk aunt

Moran challenges Albert and loses hafe the time

Sometimes Fred just sits in Liam's library and Liam doesn't mind that

Jack and moneypenny are at this point good friends

Moneypenny replaces all of Alberts wine with Apple juice (she had enough of this drunk mf)

Albert and sherly get dunk together (bonding over Liam probably)

Update

Moran is chaotic af and is terrified of Louis

Louis once told sherly "your not that bad" when Liam was sick and sherly felt good about himself for the whole year

Moran gets a gift from Louis once. He keeps it along with Liam's clock

Liam x having tea

Moneypenny gets gifts from bonde. They secret besties

Jack likes spending time with small kids

Thank you for reading

[allwaswell16]

One Direction fics that deal with self harm in some way as requested in this ask. You can find my other fic recs here. Please leave kudos and comments for the writers if you like the fic!

—Harry/Louis—

✧ Only You Can Be My Alpha by @wubwubnparmaham *

(M, 212k, a/b/o) Chance, luck, or maybe fate brings Louis to this tribe when he’d least expected to receive kindness and shelter from a stranger, and when he arrives, something in his soul pulls him to Harry like a raging river current. 

✧ Shake Me Down by AGreatPerhaps12 / @agreatperhaps12 *

(NR, 208k, uni au) Harry's new to college, fresh out of Catholic school and conversion therapy camp, and Louis runs the campus LGBTQIA organization.

✧ Undone, Undress by @angelichl *

(E, 134k, uni au) Louis' new roommate is shy, skittish, and flinches at the slightest sounds. 

✧ Baby Heaven's in your Eyes by @theboyfriendstagram

(E, 120k, high school) a sixth form!AU where Harry is the fucked up bad boy with too many problems, Louis is the perfect rich boy with too much money and their schools are right across from each other. They meet at a party and that’s the last (and maybe the only) thing they need.

✧ I hear you calling in the dead of night by Thelonelycoast *

(M, 72k, high school au) No one really notices Marcel Styles. 

✧ But I’m the Quarterback by 4ureyesonly28 / @evilovesyou

(E, 51k, 90s au) At True Directions, Harry meets four other boys and five girls, all there to be cured of their homosexuality. He has to find a way out of this place as soon as possible—Christ, he isn’t even gay!

✧ What the Water Gave Me by @larryatendoftheday

(M, 28k, mermaid au) When a mermaid crawls out of the sea and into Harry’s life, it changes everything. Suddenly he has a secret, and it’s a precarious balance between two worlds

✧ In This Life I Shall Have Joy by polka_stripes / @polkadotsvstripes

(E, 18k, religion) Assigned to be Mormon missionary companions together in Cortez, Colorado, Elders Styles and Tomlinson find a little more joy in their service than they anticipated.

✧ Ex Cathedra by @haztobegood *

(M, 4k, religion) Harry nodded. “Yeah, but if the Church doesn’t accept me, how am I supposed to worship God?”

—Rare Pairs—

✧ Not Your Fault But Mine by sunsetmog / @magicalrocketships *

(E, 127k, Louis/Nick Grimshaw) It's the beginning of Louis' second year at uni, and he's sharing a house with his four best friends in the world. This is going to be the best fucking year ever, Louis can just tell. The best fucking year ever.

[larry-hiatus]

30 Days of Smut Snippets - Day 29

I’m posting this one a bit early because I had a hard therapy session, and I deserve a treat lol. Here is something I just started working on for a fest that’s due soon! I shared a few snippets in the @1d-library but here is the next part!

Louis carefully returned Harry’s hand to his lap before lightly grabbing the boy’s chin and tipping it upwards. He let his fingers trail down over Harry’s Adam’s apple and came to breathe in his ear. “You need it, sweetheart?”

Harry nodded ever so slightly, and Louis could feel a swallow under his finger tips. “Please,” Harry said hoarsely as Louis slowly wrapped his hand around Harry’s neck. “I need it.”

“You’re gonna get it, baby,” Louis said lowly, giving a gentle squeeze as he nipped at Harry’s earlobe. “I’m gonna give it to you. You’re so good for asking, yeah?”

Harry’s throat buzzed under Louis’ hand as he tried to answer, but Louis only squeezed harder and hummed against Harry’s skin. “You best stay quiet, darling. I don’t think a dirty slut like you deserves to speak right now. Not after misbehaving all day and being a little attention whore last night. Is that what you need? You need some attention?”

Another vibration shocked Louis’ palm as Harry moaned, and the dom finally eased up his grip. “I’ll give you attention, pet,” he droned, placing a kiss on Harry’s jaw. “You’re gonna get so much attention that you’ll be begging for me to stop.”

Harry gave a high whine and swallowed hard again.

Louis chuckled darkly. “Go upstairs, get undressed, and wait for me. Then you can have some attention.”

(Find the rest here)

[jocelyns-journey]

As you may know, Jocelyn was born 3.5 months early. I went into preterm labor due to a uterine infection I didn’t know I had. By the time we got checked in to the hospital it was too late to stop things. She was born via c-section because she was breech weighing only 2 lbs 2 oz. She was flown to St. Joseph’s Hospital in PHX and was cared for there by excellent nurses and doctors for the next 3.5 months. (Shout out to Melissa and Jamie, our primary nurses, Dr. Ulm, and Dr. Bristol!) They not only kept Jocelyn alive but they kept us alive as well.

On day 5 of life, Jocelyn had what is called a grade IV intraventricular hemorrhage. A brain bleed…to the most significant degree. It was a agonizing wait-and-see week. But she was a fighter and she was not ready to give up the fight for her life. I still marvel at how something so small and fragile could be so strong and fierce. It was truly miraculous. There were secondary problems to deal with because of her IVH. She developed hydrocephalus and required a shunt to remove the extra fluid pressing on her brain. There were many more obstacles and victories and miracles but on October 17th we brought our precious baby home.

We signed up for early intervention immediately as preemies often need support with their early development. As she grew we started to realize the implications her IVH had on her body. Her right arm was not as active as her left arm and her milestones like rolling, crawling, sitting, walking were all delayed. At age three she got the official diagnosis of cerebral palsy. More specifically, right-sided hemiparesis. We thank God the impacts have only been physical, not cognitive. She’s a clever and quick witted and spunky little girl.

We’ve been busy with therapies, surgeries, specialist appointments and treatments over the past 8 years. But Jocelyn is just one of the kids in our loving circle of family and friends. Sometimes she is frustrated by her limitations, but she is persistent and incredibly determined to do most things. I had come to accept that this is what life would consist of for her, the constant war with her body to comply to her will. Figuring out ways to adapt things to her ability. It could be worse, much worse. But then, at a routine follow up visit with her orthopedic surgeon this past spring, I was told something that would change what I thought was possible.

She said she thought Jocelyn might be a candidate for a surgery called Selective Dorsal Rhizotomy. A strange set of words she had to repeat three times and then write down for me. I was shocked that there was a treatment option for cerebral palsy that I hadn’t heard of before. I went home and researched and found story after story of life change after SDR. This lead to several evaluations and conversations with her specialists and in the summer she was approved for surgery. This all coincided with our big move to Georgia, not great timing. But we weighed our options and decided the best thing for her was to have the surgery with Dr. TS Park at the St. Louis Children’s Hospital. He is the leading expert and has performed this surgery thousands of times in his career.

This brings us to today. In a few short weeks we will be driving to St. Louis for this life-changing surgery. It is momentous. As we prepare mentally and emotionally for the trip we ask that you keep Jocelyn and our family in your prayers. For those of you who want to know more about SDR here is a link to great information from someone who had the surgery as a young adult.

I will use this platform to share her journey through surgery, recovery and rehabilitation. Thank you for listening to our story and for supporting her.

[sunflowersometimes]

hello! the amazing @callouiee tagged me in their post spelling their url with songs they like for me to do the same if i wanted and i thought it would be fun! they made theirs l&h/larrie related but i have such a long url that i think I’m going to use my favorite songs as well! this will also give me an excuse to gush about some of my fav songs

so i wrote the above paragraph and then tried to find and narrow down songs which proved to be very difficult lol. i probably made it harder on myself than needed bc i wanted to choose best and most perfect songs but there are just too many. this is the best list i could come up with, but i feel pretty good with it! if anyone ever wants to talk music, i’m so down i have so many favorites.

p.s. i really truly did gush about every song i’m so sorry for how long this is

s- Satellite (Harry Styles) this song is my baby. i love her with every fiber of my being. i have dance parties by myself in my apartment when this song comes on i literally can’t get enough of it. i honestly thought matilda would be my fav song off harry’s house cause like... it’s matilda, but this is the song i come back to most often from that album.

u- U.N.I (Ed Sheeran) okay so i have so many distinct memories listening to this song on the bus to/from middle school. anything from ed’s + album was my favorite. his stuff from that time used to be my favorite music along with 1D. i thought i was so cool when i memorized the rap part lol

n- No Children (The Mountain Goats) i will admit i did find this song through the tiktok trend but i absolutely loved that trend, i thought it was so cute. i listened to the full song shortly after discovering the song and it shortly became my second most listened to song of last year. w/o getting into too much detail, this song holds a special place in my therapy journey lol 

f- Fine Line (Harry Styles) what is there to say about her? she probably holds the biggest spot in music related to my healing journey. i fully annotated her once through the lens of my own therapy and healing journey. she means a lot a lot to me

l- Like Real People Do (Hozier) i am a hozier slut and i’m not afraid to admit it. i love anything this man puts out. sometimes i listen to his music like i’m a thirsty begger and his music is the only water that’s been offered to me in weeks. i could have put any of his songs on this list and you would have gotten the same reaction out of me. he makes me feel feral and ethereal at the same time.

o- Outer Space/Carry on (5SOS) god this song will never not get me. this song was my fine line of my middle school/high school years. if i ever see this song live i’m pretty sure i’ll die on the spot. i have a half-ish sleeve tattoo planned around this song. there’s like five songs on this list that i have tattoos planned around but none of them as big as this one. everything about this song is just perfect.

w- Written All Over Your Face (Louis Tomlinson) do i even need to say anything about this one? it’s been on repeat since the album came out. it’s literally so good and i know it’s everyone’s favorite but it’s for a damn good reason. have you heard louis’ voice?????? literally perfection absolute bop and i can’t stop listening to it. this is louis’ sound and i’m so proud of him

e- Emotions (5SOS) any time i make a new playlist of things i’m currently listening to to have one shuffle/repeat, i put this entire album on there. i feel like the more i listen to it, the more addicted i get. also, Liz told me this song was very me codded and i feel like that’s so true. i’m always in my emotions lol. also also, that little clap/slap that happens every so often in this song gives me an unnecessary amount of serotonin. 

r- Right Now (1D) i also could have put any one direction song on this list but there’s something about this song that has always had a grip on my brain. immediate performance mode whenever this song comes on. they’re my boys. my babies. i’ve been a fan for a decade now which is absolutely wild. i miss them

s- Spaces (1D) this might have to be in my top 5 favorite one d songs. i don’t know if i even have an actual top 5 but if i did, this song would be in it. i feel like i’m ascending whenever i listen to this song; it’s similar vibes to satellite in dance party mode for me if that makes sense lol i can’t help but move whenever i hear this song

o- Only the Brave (Louis Tomlinson) again, does this need any explanation? there was a while when i couldn’t listen to this song bc it hurt my closeted heart too much. it still makes me sad but also very optimistic. i hope i can hear this song live one day surrounded by fellows queers who’ve also found their family through the boys. it doesn’t make it a solo song anymore then does it? we’re a family; more of a family than any church i’ve been a part of. 

m- Mum (Luke Hemmings) another album where i could put literally any song on this list bc i love them all so much. this song, however, beats the others out ever so slightly as being my favorite. i’m noticing a pattern with my favorite songs: satellite, spaces, mum. they all have a really big build up to an absolute cathartic release later on in the song. mum does give me church song vibes but in the least song ruining way possible. this song actually inspired me to make a playlist of songs that make me feel like im ascending whenever i listen to them

e- Egg and Soldier (Cosmo Sheldrake) okay okay okay i know you’re thinking that this song came super duper out of left field and is really weird and i definitely agree but here me out. all of his songs are super fun and kinda weird but so so cool and unique and unpredictable. i have yet to come across a song of his i don’t love. they all make me feel so connected to my inner child/the creativity i pushed away for so long.

t- To Be Alone (Hozier) again, i’m a hozier slut. this might be my favorite song of his but i’m unsure if i can even pick a favorite hozier song. that slide on ‘feeeeeels good’ gets me every single time. i’m weak in the knees i’m obsessed. the grungy, dirty electric guitar???? i can’t it’s too much 

i- If I Could Fly (One Direction) i couldn’t not add this one. it’s iconic and makes me cry maybe half of the time i listen. who let them write, record, and release this song? it’s literally so raw and vulnerable and i know i’ve written some pretty raw poetry but i don’t think i’ve ever written anything on this level. like ?????? i forget this song is a real song they released and not something a fanfic writer made up

m- Matter of Time (Ashton Irwin) god this album destroys me in the best way possible. and this song???? literally speaks to me and my soul. this is another one i want to get a tattoo of. it’s just like a warm hug from an older sibling/older friend. everything’s gonna be okay bud

e- evermore (Taylor Swift) I do love me some good taylor swift, especially folklore and evermore. i don’t think this one is my favorite, that’s probably the lakes, but i do remember hearing it for the first time and absolutely loosing it at the word switch at the end of the song. it still holds a special place in my heart for the hopefulness it’s able to give me whenever i don’t have a lot of it.

s- Sunflower Vol. 6 (Harry Styles) and we’re ending on the song that i wish i could be. if i could have the vibes of any song it would be this one. i’m one of those obnoxious people that make sunflowers their whole personality and whenever harry released this song i went feral for it. i love her so much and i hope i grow up and make her proud.

okay now that i’ve written more than anyone wanted to read, i want to tag some recent mutuals to do this too! Obviously there’s no pressure to do this or to write as much as i did, simply just putting a song is enough lol

@bravetemptation  @lunarheslwt  @primary-wicf​  @flyhometolou28

[poledancingghostson]

Favourite Tarlos Scenes!!

Tagged by @guardian-angle22 and @whenshereads thank youuuu

5. “I love how big your heart is for bringing in strays.”

This whole episode could go on here to be honest. I love when this show just embraces how insane it is and goes full comedy and Rafa and Ronen both could easily star in a sitcom. This episode is such a nice light view of their often heavy relationship and it shows how much they love and support each other without either of them being in pain, which is a really nice change. Plus, I love TK loving animals and relate to it a lot because I would also bring home a lizard like that. And also Vegan!TK is canon to me okay.

4. “Lou 2, or Louis the Second”

Can you tell I love lizards??? This scene is just all kinds of lovely and adorable. Never mind the most adorable and gorgeous bearded dragon I have ever scene, the way they support each other and put the other’s needs first here is just *mwah*. I love watching their conflict resolution skills in seasons 3 and 4 because we really see how fucking healthy their relationship is in a way that I don’t think we often see on TV, especially soap operas. Of course this episode drove home that Carlos is not Mentally Healthy lol so he should really go to therapy cos Gabriel (rip tho I notoriously never liked him) fucked him up soooooo bad. Also shoutout to Jewish TK in this episode cos that made me deeply happy. Second shoutout to the entire Riddle of the Sphinx episode which I’m not including only because my explanation for why I love it is pretty much the same as it was for this scene and there’s too many fucking amazing scenes to choose from.

3. “And we’re soulmates.”

Gotta love a comfort scene. I mean. Just the way they love each other so hard in this scene and the way Carlos comforts TK with touch and the way TK wants to protect him but Carlos just can’t fathom a world where he wouldn’t spend whatever life they have together and the way they end the scene hugging instead of kissing??? (Cue Dear Baby from Waitress lmao) They just. They’re so ???? You know??????? Sorry I’ve run out of words. You get it though.

2. “Breathe.”

There’s just so much relief and care in this scene. The number of times I’ve watched it just willing it to be LONGER. I love a reunion scene, I love a comfort scene and this aces both. There was so much great build up to this moment and so many emotions riding on it and it could have fallen flat but it didn’t. TK barely being able to open his eyes but still noticing that Carlos wasn’t okay and taking care of him the only way he could even though he literally just almost died??? Fucking inspired. This enveloping hug???? The love is fucking palpable. What a scene man. What a fucking scene. Wish it was longer.

1. “Tyler, can I say yes now?”

What can I even say really?? It’s the perfect proposal scene. It’s so deeply romantic in its simplicity. It’s raw and honest and not some big public spectacle (which just makes me cringe) it’s just them sharing their love. The scene is emotional and funny and so VERY them. The acting is wonderful, the writing is wonderful, Carlos calling TK Tyler is a God-tier choice every time… I cannot tell you how many times I’ve watched this scene. And it still makes me cry. I want to be enveloped by this scene. I want it pumped into my veins. I want to LIVE in it. Absolute perfection.

Idk who to tag so just say I tagged you if you wanna do it!

[byneddiedingo]

Lorne Greene and Joan Crawford in Autumn Leaves (Robert Aldrich, 1956) Cast: Joan Crawford, Cliff Robertson, Vera Miles, Lorne Greene, Ruth Donnelly, Shepperd Strudwick. Screenplay: Jean Rouverol*, Hugo Butler*, Lewis Meltzer, Robert Blees. Cinematography: Charles Lang. Music: Hans J. Salter. Costume design: Jean Louis. Six years before What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? Robert Aldrich directed Joan Crawford in Autumn Leaves. I mention this because the image many people now have of Aldrich comes from Alfred Molina's portrayal of him in the TV series Feud that concentrated on the shenanigans of Crawford and Bette Davis on the set of Baby Jane. Molina's Aldrich is a punching bag for Jessica Lange's Crawford and Susan Sarandon's Davis, and a studio hack under the thumb of Stanley Tucci's snaky Jack Warner. In fact, Aldrich was a gifted director with some strong credits, including the noir version of Mickey Spillane's Kiss Me Deadly (1955) and the action epic The Dirty Dozen (1967). Autumn Leaves shows off his strengths, especially in keeping a florid melodrama about Hollywood's idea of mental illness just this side of plausibility. He makes the most of the film's major set, Millicent Wetherby's (Crawford) bungalow, collaborating with cinematographer Charles Lang to keep an ordinary dwelling shadowy, confining, and off-kilter. Aldrich is particularly good at working with significant objects, and not only the typewriter that Burt Hanson (Cliff Robertson) so memorably hurls at Millicent. After a tense confrontation between Millicent and the increasingly unstable Burt, she goes from one room to another and there, front and center, Aldrich has placed precisely what we want to see: the telephone she should use to call for help. You sometimes sense that Aldrich is having a little fun with the film, too: He stages a beach makeout scene with Millicent and Burt kissing in the incoming tide that's an allusion to the celebrated scene with Deborah Kerr and Burt Lancaster in From Here to Eternity (Fred Zinnemann, 1953). Aldrich is surely aware that Crawford was offered Kerr's role but turned it down. Crawford had just turned 50 and her face was beginning to harden into the familiar mask of her later years, but she's still plausibly a good five to 10 years younger as the tense, wary, but near-fatally susceptible Millicent. Robertson, especially in his early scenes, keeps us wondering whether Burt is more than just a creep who likes to hit on older women. Unfortunately, the portrayal of mental illness is the usual Hollywood hackwork: Millicent is in denial about Burt's psychosis because she is starved for love, having sacrificed herself in her youth so she could tend to her father, an invalid. Burt's compulsive lying is the result of a trauma suffered when he discovered that his wife was having an affair with his father. And of course, a montage of medication and shock therapy is all that's needed to persuade us that Burt has been rehabbed and is ready to resume something like a normal relationship with a wife old enough to be his mother. If I were Millicent, I'd keep the typewriter locked up when not in use. *Jean Rouverol and Hugo Butler were blacklisted. The screen credit went to their "front," Jack Jevne.

[daomaikeng]

"at this point there’s absolutely nothing that could could convince me that louis tomlinson isn’t gay but y’all stay safe tho" Good!!! Admitting to complete delusion and detachment from reality by disregarding all the facts and logic in favour of absolute belief! You need to be able to admit the problem so that you can start Cognitive behavioral therapy. It is the first step in therapy for conspiracy theorists.

aw baby thank you!

[akwardlyuncool]

Class Favorites: Videos (Short & Long)

Here’s a few YouTube and TikTok videos that did it for me this year, in no particular order.

PS: YouTube videos were easier to embed here, so if the TikTok video had an official YouTube link I went with that one instead, simply out of ease.

The CEO Of Corn! (Recess Therapy)

I saw this video on TikTok and wanted to cry because the video was just so cute and it just warmed my heart so much. Kids are often times how we’d like to restore faith in humanity and that’s a lot of weight for a kid, however this less than 2 minute long video does a really good job at trying. I hope that Tariq (The Corn Kid and Official Corn Ambassador) gets all the good this world has to offer and I hope he reaps all the Black Boy Joy he can.

New Soul Rewrite (Louis lll/Louisiiioficial)

I obviously come across a ton of covers and 30 second song clips on TikTok, however this one immediately pulled on all of my heart strings. I remember Burr_iam using the song/sound in one of their videos where they were they were highlighting their new baby (can’t find the video, but it was cute) and knew I needed a full version. Unfortunately there is no full version of the song, even though I’m sure that’s a question Louis lll probably gets asked on a daily. This is the baby montage song of the moment, so it’s understandable why. Also the original New Soul is one of my favorite songs ever, so I get why I love this one so much.

The Summer Set Drinks and Talks BREAK-UP and REUNION!

If you’re unaware The Summer Set got back together and are doing all the things. This is video where they essentially play Truth Or Drink while answering questions about them breaking up and passed memories and what their reunion has been looking like. I love conversation videos like this, ones that make me want join in on that conversation. I love talking music and life and getting it from band I love is always a treat.

Now I’m not gonna lie, I haven’t listened to their new album Blossom yet, mainly because I’m salty that they didn’t put it on CD, but you should and I will make it a priority this year.

Honorable Mention:

Goes out to the Try Guys for their response video to the situation that look place with a former member of the group and the podcast that followed. They were both done so well and I think we all appreciated how that situation was handled.

[kessicasrps]

"Of course I'd want to be with you again. I don't know that I would be that lucky though. I feel like I am the one to blame for all this drama with the girls.. It kills me inside. Haley wouldn't be dealing with any of this if I had been an actual decent father to her from the start," I say, putting so much of the blame on myself. I carried so much guilt around when it came to how I treated you and Haley in the past. I nod at you when hearing what you said next. "I just think it might be better to keep the girls apart for now.. I need to focus on having one-on-one time with Brooke too and maybe getting her into therapy. She can't go on treating people this way. I would love for them to be sisters one day and in each other's lives but I have to do what is best for both of them right now. I doubt Haley wants to be around Brooke right now too and I can't blame her," I say honestly. "I appreciate you being here for me though. I definitely don't deserve you.."

---

"Louis, I would have done anything to be with you again," I say softly as I looked in your eyes. "I'd always take you back in a heart beat," I added. "You were the love of my life, and if I'm honest, you still are, I haven't been able to picture myself with anyone else, and I've never pictured raising Haley with anyone else," I added. "It's always been you," I say as well. "I know you're going through a divorce, and we don't have to tell anyone or show it in public, but I know Haley would love it more than anything if we were together, and I'd love it too," I explained as I bit my lip. "I wouldn't have asked you to move in with us if I had negative feelings for you," I tell you. "I just always thought you never wanted me back because you chose someone else over me, I always thought I wasn't enough for you," I say. I nodded in response to what you said about Brooke. "I understand, and I'm sure Haley does completely. I just don't want you to be a stranger to Brooke." I say honestly. "I don't know how you'd feel about it, but we can always look into getting a house or an apartment, so you can have Brooke over and she can have her own room and like I said, Haley and I can keep at a distance. I don't want you to feel like a stranger if we live together and you bring her around, especially when you get custody and you end up having her for weekends or holidays or when she's out of school, you'll need a place to bring her to." I added. "I want to make this works for us, and for you, and the girls,"

__

"Okay, yeah... you're right," I say, leaning my head on your shoulder and continuing to hold onto your hand, squeezing it gently. "I want to protect what's going on between us because this is new and it's not like we're in a relationship or anything. We're just getting to know each other right now. This film shoot is only a few weeks anyways so we can just keep this between us for now," I say. I knew I had to protect my heart and my own well-being after being in such a draining and difficult relationship. I knew that I liked spending time with you though and I was looking forward to spending more time with you later. I get out of the car when we arrived to set, putting my sunglasses back on and keeping some distance between us as I headed to my trailer. "I will see you in a bit, yeah?"

---

"And I understand, baby," I say as I held onto your hand tightly. "I want us to enjoy what we have before anyone knows," I added. I kept you close to me for the rest of the car ride, rubbing your back and kissing the top of your head so you could feel comforted. Once we got to set I watched as you put your glasses on. "Baby, you don't need to hide, you are beautiful inside and out," I say honestly. "But I will see you in a bit,"