#make you smile

[mamashenanigans]

Well, I was having a busy day grooming dogs.

Then a little girl asked if I could take an unscheduled groom today.

Well, I couldn’t say “no”!

And her dog was such a good boy and really made my day worthwhile!!!

This is Black & Orange’s first spa day!

Enjoy!

Oh, and yes, the little girl was very pleased and loved the photos of Black & Orange’s spa day I text’d to her mom!!!

[mansorus]

Where is my lover 🦇🤍🖤

[out-of-now]

December butterfly 🦋

[emilixthefox]

I need to give people hugs to make their day better or at lest make them smile.

So come here now and let me give you hugs.

-^- > >

That wasn't request it was a order. Hug you now.

[inspiration-fun-and-stuff]

There was 9 in the bed and they all rolled over and 1 fell off lol 😂

Gorgeous puppies

[super-notnatural]

Happy little baby. Just look how happy and content the baby is 💕💕

[positivesights]

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMLGSByBw/

[poetry-protest-pornography]

Oh, this is incredible.

Improv swing dance to a Todrick Hall song?

And they killed it!

ETA *thanks to the people who pointed out my oops. Idk why I said RuPaul??!

[petscoboba]

I want Toby Fox three years after the last chapter to make a game where it's just the Fun Gang going on a road trip to the east coast to go fishing. They raid a gas station on the way to grabs snacks for the road (and the lobsters they catch). Happy April Fool's.

[sidchan]

I had surgery today, I remember being terrified of going under. I had never had anesthesia before. However, of the few memories I have I remember right after having my breathing tube removed I woke up in recovery. Take On Me was playing. It filled me with joy as I began singing along while feeling as if I were on a cloud. My tonsils had been removed as well as parts of my nose. And I remember singing with all the gusto of being in the shower, not a care in the world.... Looking back the only concern I had was knowing I couldn't hold his one long note towards the end. So apparently knowing this I held off. What I had not considered is how the poor surgical nurses probably had to hear the saddest, gravelly screeched rendition of Take On Me by a very drugged up patient that only vaguely gained consciousness.

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[amygdalae]

I think he wld be very happy as a zookeeper

[mansorus]

Actual message from me to an amazing girl .

[out-of-now]

[nonomives]

I did something

[cordiallyfuturedwight]

🌻

HI BBY