#make your own organic fertilizer

[gardenholic]

5 Type of Best Organic Fertilizers That You Must Have for Your Home Garden

Organic fertilizers are a substance composed of animal or vegetable matter used alone or in combination with one or more non synthetically derived elements or compounds.  These fertilizers are naturally produced and are materials that can be added to soil or plants, in order to provide nutrients and sustain growth.  Typical organic fertilizers include all animal waste including meat processing…

[dandylovesturtles]

Made myself emotional over the “Leo and Donnie chose to be twins” headcanon.

———

“By the way, it’s Leo and Donnie’s birthday next Thursday. You’re coming, right?”

Draxum looked up from his work organizing next week’s lunch schedule to look at Michelangelo, sitting on the counter and swinging his feet. Celebrating individual birthdays wasn’t a thing that the yokai did, but Draxum had been forced to accept that the boys could not be dissuaded from this human tradition. He’d been to two birthday parties now, for Michelangelo and Raphael respectively, eating cake and presenting them with some small trinket he purchased.

He’d known that he would have to go to more birthday parties at some point. But he wasn’t expecting two at once.

“Why on the same day? I can’t imagine the blue one wanting to share.” Actually, he couldn’t imagine Donatello wanting to share, either.

“Oh,” said Michelangelo with a laugh. “That’s ‘cause they’re twins!”

Draxum stared at him. “Twins? What kind of nonsense is that?”

Mikey tilted his head. “What do you mean?”

“They’re entirely different species, for starters,” Draxum pointed out.

“I mean, we all are, but we’re still brothers.”

“Yes, by virtue of your shared DNA donor and the circumstances of your raising.” Draxum waved that off. “But “twins” refers to a situation where two children are born at once, especially as the result of a split of a fertilized egg. Which is absolutely impossible in the case of Leonardo and Donatello. Even if I were to be charitable and simply consider them “twins” for having the same hatch day, I can tell you they do not.”

“Uh, okay,” said Michelangelo, unimpressed. “But they’ve always been twins, so I don’t think it matters to them.”

“Why not? I would think it would matter to Donatello especially, since he claims to be scientifically minded.”

Michelangelo laughed. “Not everything is about science, Barry. Not even to Donnie.”

“Then his decisions about when to apply science and when not to are inconsistent and confusing.”

“Well, it’s their birthday, so they get to pick.”

“I am certain that is not how birthdays work.”

“It’s how it works for us!” Michelangelo slipped off the counter. “We’ll see you on Thursday, right? It’ll mean a lot to them if you come!”

Draxum was fairly sure Leonardo in particular would prefer he didn’t, but that didn’t matter. Now he had a mission: he had to correct this strange incongruence.

“Yes, I will be there.”

“Yay!” cheered Michelangelo. “Okay, see ya Dad!”

He squeezed Draxum around the waist on his way out. Draxum was finding he didn’t mind that as much as he used to.

———

Leonardo and Donatello’s party was just as loud and obnoxious as the other two. Blue and purple decorations covered every inch of the old subway station, strange music blared from unseen speakers, and a horrendous amount of junk food was spread out over a table. It was the same group of people present today as there ever was, the eclectic mix of humans and yokai that the boys considered family, but it felt like a crowd three times the size with the amount of noise being made.

Draxum stood off on his own for most of it, his slim birthday present already delivered to the table stacked with gifts. He’d been a little shocked when Donatello and then Leonardo came by to say hello, since he’d been prepared to be ignored by both of them. It was… nice, maybe, that they did that. Even if Leonardo just wanted to make jokes at his expense.

For most of the party, the two birthday boys seemed to be competing with each other for attention. In fact, the longer he took it all in, the whole affair seemed like a clash of ideas. The purple decorations were neat and tidy, geometric patterns and hard angles. The blue decorations were whimsical, uncoordinated, and haphazard, and there were places it seemed someone had deliberately covered up some of the purple with the blue. Leonardo wanted to play rock music and Donatello wanted to play techno. The cake was a mess because they’d both requested different themes for the decorations. There were arguments between the two of them every few minutes, and according to the human girl April this was “typical behavior.”

But why? They weren’t really twins. They didn’t have to share this day.

Hopefully Draxum’s plan would fix all this nonsense.

When it was time for gifts, Leonardo loudly declared that he was going first, sparking an argument. They squabbled for a bit before agreeing to play rock-paper-scissors, which was apparently what they did every year.

Leonardo won the game and celebrated obnoxiously while Donatello scowled at him. Then he gestured at the gift table - which Draxum, in his efforts to stay out of the main throng, was closest to.

“Hey, Barry! Grab me a gift! Make it a good one.”

Draxum sighed but reached over to take one of the blue packages, checking the tag to make sure it was for Leonardo. “This one is… to Leo from Donnie,” he read.

“Oh no, not that one. Our presents to each other are always last.”

“Because they always get sappy about it,” said April with a laugh.

“Do not!” yelled Leonardo at the same time Donatello hissed, “You take that back!”

“Uh, yeah you do, and you know I’m right.”

Draxum ignored the petty argument to look back at the gift table. If they weren’t going to be satisfied with his choice, he might as well give them his own gift.

He lifted it, in its sensible brown packaging, off the table and handed it over.

“Why not start with this? It’s to both of you from me.”

“Both of us at once?” asked Leonardo. “Oh man, you’re throwing off our whole system, Barry.”

“Yes, but he’s giving it to you,” Donatello pointed out, “which means my turn is still next.”

“Uh, no, if it’s for both of us then it counts for both of us, which means it comes back around to me!”

“Ooooh no, you do not get to loophole your way into opening two presents in a row-“

“Ahem!” Draxum loudly cleared his throat, getting their attention. “Would you please just open it?”

“Yikes,” said Leonardo. “Touchy.”

“Some people just don’t understand the sanctity of opening birthday gifts,” said Donatello with a sniff. But he leaned in to watch as Leonardo tore off the wrapping paper and opened the box.

They were both silent for a moment, staring at it. Then Leonardo said, “Uh, no offense, Barry, but what is this?”

“It’s a… scientific study on how twins are formed during the gestational period,” said Donatello, pulling the paper clipped thesis from the box. “Oh, there are more in here… Also about twins.”

“Uh…” Leonardo blinked at it, clearly bewildered. Well, he was always a bit slow. “Thanks…? I think?”

“Not that I don’t appreciate the scientific literature,” said Donatello, “but this isn’t really my area of study and Leo does better with training manuals and textbooks than research papers.” He looked up at Draxum. “Is there something about this we aren’t getting?”

“Yes there is,” said Draxum, sweeping his hand around at the entire party. “I am here to correct your mistaken assumption that you are twins.”

The room fell silent. Donatello set the paper back in the box, staring at him. Leonardo’s brow creased in anger.

“We are twins, though,” he said, setting the box aside like it was burning him.

“No, you are not. There is simply no way that the two of you could be twins. It is biologically impossible.”

“You think that I’m so stupid I don’t know that?” Donatello demanded, getting up from the chair he was sitting in. “Are you doubting my intelligence?”

“Yes, if you honestly think you are twins with him, then I am.”

“Uhhh, Draxum,” said Michelangelo quickly, stepping between him and the now furious Donatello, “this was a… funny joke, but you can stop now-“

“This is not a joke. I am simply explaining the facts.”

“Yeah, well,” now Leonardo was on his feet, too, “the facts are that me and Donnie are twins. Always have been, always will be.”

“You are not,” Draxum insisted. “And given what I have seen here today, I’d think you’d both be relieved, since you clearly don’t enjoy being twins!”

Both boys looked like they’d just been slapped in the face. The rest of the room had gone completely silent, like everyone was collectively holding their breath.

Donatello broke first, turning on his heel and marching out of the room, his hands balled into fists and his shoulders hunched up as high as they could go. “Dee!” called Leonardo, and then he was scurrying off after him. There was the sound of a heavy door slamming, then silence.

It didn’t last long.

“Draxum!” roared the rat, actually getting up from his chair to get in Draxum’s face. “You come in here and upset my boys on their own birthday!?”

“Seriously not cool, Drax,” said the human April. Cassandra shook her head in shared disappointment behind her.

Draxum pushed Lou Jitsu back, scowling at his accusers. “I was only explaining reality! This is really the rat’s fault for letting their delusion go on so long.”

“Delusion!?”

“Barry!”

“Rat!?”

“Ooookay,” said Raphael suddenly, stepping his way into the middle of the fray and starting to herd Draxum back toward the exit. “That’s enough of that for now.”

“I am simply trying to explain-“

“Trust me, hoss, you wanna step away from this one,” said Raphael, and his tone was angry but surprisingly measured. “Come on.”

They retreated to the sewer tunnels outside the subway station. The smell was much worse out here, and Draxum wrinkled his nose.

“Alright.” Raphael heaved a sigh, folding his arms. “So here’s the deal. Mikey likes you, and I guess I kinda do too, so I’m gonna try to help you before you completely torpedo your chances with the rest of the guys. Which, you kinda did already, but maybe we can turn it around.”

“I still don’t understand why they’re so upset,” said Draxum. “Surely it was obvious they aren’t twins.”

“Uh, yeah, they know they aren’t twins by bio-whatever,” agreed Raphael. “They ain’t stupid.”

“Hmm.” Draxum turned up his nose. “Donatello isn’t stupid, maybe.”

“Leo ain’t stupid, either, he just pretends like it.” Raphael pinched his brow. “Listen, that isn’t the point - the point is they already know they didn’t come from the same egg or hatch the same day or whatever. They’re just twins anyway.”

“But how? That doesn’t make sense!”

Raphael sighed again. “Alright, look. Dad didn’t know when we hatched, right? But we all wanted birthday parties like we saw on TV, so he let us pick.”

“Yes. And for some reason Leonardo and Donatello chose the same day.” Draxum could figure that much out on his own.

Raphael nodded. “I was the biggest and oldest, and Mikey was the littlest and youngest, and Leo and Donnie were just kinda sandwiched in the middle. I think at first they just wanted a thing. Somethin’ that set them apart from me and Mikey, ya know?”

“Not really,” said Draxum. Raphael glared at him, and he sighed. “But go on.”

“So they picked the same birthday and called themselves twins. I think Pops just so glad they were actually getting along that he agreed to it. And I think he thought once we got to the day, and they realized they were really gonna have to share it, they’d both demand their own day instead. I know I thought that was gonna happen.” He smiled at the memory. “But the day came, and… they fussed the whole time just like they do now. Arguing about what kind of cake they wanted and who got to open their present first. But they didn’t ask to split. They kept it the same day, and they kept calling each other twins and it just stuck, until we didn’t question it anymore.”

“…They are both stubborn,” Draxum pointed out, and Raphael laughed once.

“Yeah, guess they are. But that’s not what this is.” Raphael shrugged. “They chose each other back then. Maybe at first it was just to have a thing, but then it became real. And every single year they keep choosing each other. That’s why they’re twins.”

Choosing each other as twins… Draxum furrowed his brow. “It’s not normally a choice,” he pointed out finally.

“Yeah, well, our family doesn’t get a lot of choices, so just let ‘em have this one, okay?”

“…Fine,” Draxum finally relented. “As long as it’s noted that this is purely a social designation, and not a biological one.”

“Uh, sure, whatever.” Raphael rolled his eyes. “Glad we got that cleared up, though. Think you can come back to the party and behave?”

Draxum wrinkled his nose at that phrasing, but nodded. “Yes. I will not bring it up again.”

“Good!” Raphael’s smile abruptly transitioned into something much more dangerous. “Because if you make my little brothers upset on their birthday again, I’ll remind you what it was like when we were enemies.”

Then the smile was back. “Now let’s go in!”

He walked back to the subway station, leaving Draxum to follow on his own. Draxum couldn’t help but sigh wistfully.

Raphael would have made a great general for his army.

———

The boys had already returned by the time Draxum got back. They were opening more gifts, and he noted they were wearing hoodies now - though they had apparently decided to swap their signature colors. They were smiling and chattering, and any hint of their earlier upset was gone.

Until Draxum stepped into their line of sight, and both of them went rigid, wary of him.

Apparently just talking to the red one was not enough. Draxum would have to do more. What a pain.

But he didn’t want the boys to hate him. So he sighed and launched into it.

“I… am sorry. I shouldn’t have said you aren’t twins.”

The boys looked surprised at that; slowly, their posture loosened back up.

“And… to make up for my present, I will… take the two of you wherever you want to go in the Hidden City.” The next words were painful, and he ground them out. “My treat.”

Leonardo and Donatello shifted their gaze from him to each other. They were silent, but it didn’t seem like they needed to talk to have a conversation.

Then they finally looked back at Draxum, slow grins growing over both their faces.

Eerily matching, very evil grins.

“Oh,” said Leonardo, happily menacing. “I think we can think of something.”

“I concur,” said Donatello in the exact same tone.

Oh, thought Draxum. Maybe they really are twins.

[dotster001]

Househusband Au HC'S

Summary:Crewel/Crowley/Vil/Rook/Malleus/Idia x gn!reader

Requested by @stygianoir

A/N: my tag list is still packed so hopefully you guys find this 😂

CW:sus gardener Rook, discussions of Idia's depression and fear of death, but I think that's it

Part Two. Part Three

Most well dressed parent at the PTA meeting. Puts everyone to shame, and makes all the other parents and teachers jealous.

Cooks five star meals exclusively , and makes sure you get your proper intake of nutrients. He can't have his favorite pup lacking in proper nutrition!

One hundred percent coordinates your outfits for you everyday. You're the best dressed worker, all because your husband hand sews you outfits designed to blow the competition out of the water.

Pretends he's not snuggly, until nighttime, then he gets pouty. He'll be aggressively folding laundry, and not speaking to you until you come to bed and let him hold you.

You own twelve dogs. Each dog has an individual diet it is on, that is hand made by him everyday. He knows exactly what every dog needs, and makes sure to memorize what each dog needs.

If you want kids, you will adopt/birth at least three. He likes a full house. Majored in alchemy before he settled down as your househusband, and is more than happy to tutor not just your kids, but also their friends, in alchemy.

Sings like Roger from 101 dalmatians because I said so. Also he plays the piano like him. Because I said so. I'm weak okay!

They say he had an illustrious career as a model, then he met you. That's only half true though. He was planning on retiring anyway, and just happened to meet you around that time. He likes to let the tabloids believe it was all your fault. It makes him laugh. Vil Schoenheit bows to no one! Now drink your smoothie!

Healthy meals constantly. He somehow managed to make them all taste good though. It's a little suspicious honestly…what does he put in that smoothie? You never liked smoothies for breakfast before…

He likes to do your nightly routine for you. It's his love language. At 7 pm sharp, he clears his throat, and gestures for you to sit down. Then he brushes out your hair, does your skin care routine, dresses you in pajamas, and tucks you in, making sure to give you a kiss on the forehead before he joins you.

If you aren't home in time for your nightly routine, he goes to bed early, turned away from your side of the bed. He will not speak to you, even though you know full well he is awake. He knows deep down it's not your fault, but he has simmering rage and no one else to take it out on.

That said, when you do fight (which you do a lot) he'll storm out before he can be particularly nasty. But you'll wake up to a single rose on the pillow next to you, and a new pair of shoes to wear to work.

You have one fluffy white cat, or one child. It's one or the other in Vil's pristine house. This isn't a barn, for seven's sake.

Cooks, cleans, gardens…. he's made for this life. You don't even know where he gets the time for it.

Rook prides himself on having the best garden in the neighborhood. Your neighbors asked him what fertilizer he used, and he wrapped an arm around you and giggled about how it was "the most organic around". Considering the last time you had to do laundry there were red stains on his clothes, you choose not to ask questions.

If you have kids, there are three of them, each two years apart. He makes the perfect paper bag lunches for them everyday, with little french notes in them (raising bilingual kids in this family). As he drops them off at school he kisses each one on the top of the head, and jovially waves them off.

You have two dogs that he takes hunting with him on his solo weekends (they aren't often, because he can barely stand to part from you!) But you also have a rabbit. He gave it your name, and likes to tease you by saying how he "caught his lapin" and never saying whether he's referring to you or the rabbit.

Another one who makes sure you look your best at work. But his favorite thing is when you forget your lunch, and he "has" to bring it to work for you. This is when he is at his most dressed up, and your outfits compliment eachother the most. He loves the gazes of envy that come his way as he kisses you and hands you your lunch.

When he's not doing chores at break neck speed, he wants you to either be in his arms, or him in yours. He doesn't care which! Please, his poor heart needs you!

Trust fund baby. Born rich, then married you. Tried to convince you not to work, but you wanted to, for whatever reason, so he "allows" it. (Who is he kidding? He could never deny you anything, what a simp) he sulks all day though, moping like a lovesick teen until you come home. Heaven forbid you forget something and have to come back in before you actually left, because he has your boss on speed dial, and will call you in sick. Oh, you just left your wallet? Too late, he assumed you had fallen ill and had chosen to stay home with him! 

He's a little clueless on cooking and household chores (Lilia is no help) but he tries! Boy does he try! And it's not half bad. Not stellar, but not bad. You've only gotten food poisoning once, and he's only ever burnt a hole in two of your shirts with an iron.

Loves to serenade you with his violin on special occasions. You know the evening is going to be wonderful when he pulls it out. Oftentimes, it's a song he wrote for you, and sometimes he even sings along.  His deep timbre will often have you so relaxed that you start to drift off. He's fine with that! More time to cuddle!

Speaking of, he starts the night out by laying on his side of the bed, and by the end of the night he is wrapped around you like a koala. He also gets very hot at night. You often don't need a blanket. You asked him about it once, and he said something about "draconic internal temperature regulation", whatever the fuck that means.

You had to put him on a budget because he buys you every shiny thing he sees. He always goes over budget, and always insists it's the last time and it will never happen again. This, friends, is what we call a lie.

He's only a househusband in name, really. He still has an income/job in the form of streaming and YouTube videos. But he stays at home, and likes it when you call him your househusband. He gets all blushy and smiley. He likes the idea of being the one you look forward to coming home to.

Ortho lives with you both, obviously. And he does all the cooking and cleaning. But he and Idia have an unspoken agreement that if you ask, he helped too.

Calls you at work at least once a day. It's always during your lunch break though, so that you can "eat lunch together" You know his mental health difficulties are acting up if he calls you more than once though.You don't have to come home, he'll be alright, he just needs to hear your voice.

His stream only knows you as player 2. When you get back from work, he'll say "Oh player 2 just got home!" And get so excited. He'll run off stream to give you a kiss, and won't come back until you remind him he's streaming. His followers have been there through the whole progression of your relationship, and despite not knowing what you look like, and only hearing your voice off screen every once in a while, they adore Gloomy Samurai and Player 2.

You always have two cats at a time, usually the ones at the shelter or humane society that are bonded or siblings. He doesn't want to separate a family, and also gets nervous about the inevitability of death. So you always have two cats. That way if something happens you always have one.

Yes. You get him to start telehealth therapy, and medication. Why do you ask?

He tries, bless his heart. His cooking is not bad, but his cleaning skills are subpar. To be honest, he's not cut out for the househusband life, but you've heard horror stories about how he handled his previous jobs. So for the sake of the world, you do your best to ensure he stays here.

"He's so generous" 🙄 Any time he goes a little bit above what you expected from him, he drops that line. A particularly good dessert? How generous. He actually folded laundry today? So magnanimous. But it hurts his pride if you don't agree, and you married him for some reason, right?

He has an allowance, and usually spends all of it. Sometimes it's gifts for you, but a lot of times it's for him. Which, it's his allowance, so that's fine. But he buys the weirdest stuff and doesn't use it. It just sits around your home.

If you have to work on something on the home computer, good luck to you. Home is for loving him, not working! He'll slip into your lap, give you a sexy pout, and start caressing your cheek, and tracing shapes into your neck. Then he'll start talking about how you're neglecting him, just put the work away and come cuddle with him. 

Where he shines though, is if you guys end up with kids. He's a surprisingly good father, making sure they all are clean, safe, and well fed. He helps with homework, and is surprisingly good at it, he's good at seeing what their needs are, he knows immediately when one of the kids is sick, and is at the doctor right away… you don't know where these skills came from. But the second the kids are in bed, he's back to being your needy husband.

[balkanradfem]

Gardening makes me feel so powerful. I can, with my own hands and careful usage of my brain, affect the environment so an area is populated by plants that I desire to be there, which will give me so much food I will be safe and secure for the entire year? I can change an area so it feeds me? By putting my hands in the soil and knowing how to anticipate the rain and where the roots are likely to grow and how long it takes to get a seed to fruition? I can do this with minimal effort and by adding organic matter to an area that will stop all other plants from growing, and fertilize my plants, so only my plants succeed? I can, on top of that, have all kinds of flowers growing in it, making it beautiful to me and helping all kinds of little bugs and critters have a home? I can do it in a way that makes the land even more fertile and healthy? And I'm not some sort of a deity?

Being able to control an area of land and make it into what you need to survive is powerful. Seeing it in your head and then watching it happen by the work of your own two hands is invigorating. Some things we cannot change. But we can change the area immediately around us so it both feeds us, and become beautiful and rich to us.

[moonkissedvisions]

Pick a pile/pick an image: Health messages ❤️‍🩹🌿⭐

Important: 16+. Not medical advice. If you are dealing with a health problem please talk to a professional. This is a general reading, take what resonates and leave the rest. Use your own discernment. Let your intuition guide you.

Pile 1 ❤️‍🩹

cards: Queen of Wands, King of Cups, Four of Wands, Four of Swords, Seven of Pentacles, Two of Wands.

There is a really strong need for REST here. Whether it is a physical or mental break, it is very clear that you have reached a point of great stress and exhaustion in both your body and your mind. Maybe it was a lot of work, study or overthinking and anxiety. Either way, you need to calm your nervous system urgently by walking, sleeping, meditating, deep breathing, being in nature, etc. You also need to appreciate your body and your mind for helping you work and do your daily activities. CELEBRATE your achievements but also your body and your health.

This pile has a good intuition which is helpful in making the right choices for your health. Your balance between your physical and emotional body is good. You have the need to understand the connection between your mind, body and spirit health and the multiple dimensions each of these have. For example, when people think of hormones, they most likely think about the sex and fertility aspect/dimension or hormones. But hormones are emotions, actions, and a lot of other things, so they both affect and are affected by all aspects of health. Your fertility is specially high, so if you are facing fertility problems atm, this may be a sign that you are improving and you should keep focusing on your current treatment and trusting the people who are taking care of you. Determination to quit unhealthy habits and start engaging in good ones is key for you now. You need to gain confidence in your health choices. You are capable of everything, especially rn. Everything that you want for your health is within reach, you just need to trust your course of action and be committed to it.

You need to know that you reap the fruits of the work you do on your health. If you do a good job on taking care of your health, you will feel good. If you don´t, you will not feel good. Also, if you are facing a health problem, you need to evaluate your lifestyle, routines and daily habits to find the root cause.

Finally, be grateful for the work your body does for you everyday. Thank the parts of your body that are working and healthy, instead of just focusing on your sickness/the parts that are bothering you.

Pile 2 🌿

cards: Temperance, Five of Wands, Queen of Wands, Ace of Swords, The Devil.

You may be going through a mysterious health issue, or maybe you are not listening to your body´s messages. It could be that you are ignoring a symptom, and you gave up getting a diagnosis because doctors couldn´t find the problem or had different/contradicting opinions. If that resonates, this could be a sign to not ignore it anymore, because there is a new opportunity to find help, a diagnosis, or a treatment. There is also a new opportunity to start taking care of your health, whatever that means for you

If you had a surgery, you are recovering impressively and completely. There is a lot of regeneration and transformation about this pile. It is possible that you will be cured of an illness. There is some waste in your system that is being removed and eliminated too.

Moderation is really present here. If you want to start eating healthy, quit smoking, or practicing a new form of exercise, I see you doing it gradually. This can be done in the form of reducing your portions or the amount of cigarettes you smoke daily. Your determination is high as well, you are really convinced you can reach your health goals and you probably wont stop until you make it!

Also, be careful with unprotected sex and take care of your genital organs. Avoid promiscuity by channeling your passion with other activities like working out, creating and mindfulness. SLEEP and EAT nutrient dense, building foods for regeneration. Don´t use sex to deal with every emotion. Learn about hormones and how to have healthy hormones/menstrual cycle.

Pile 3 ⭐

cards: Judgment, Two of Pentacles, King of Pentacles, Three of Swords, The Tower.

Health must be a priority as much as your work, your family and your social life are. Maybe this is something you forgot, or something you are starting to remember and being aware of now. There is a need for balance and having fun. You need to find joy in your health routines and be intentional about them. Find the joy in being in nature, playing, moving your body, making healthy meals and taking rest. Be responsible with your choices and priorities.

It is possible that you faced a sudden change in your life or a health issue that left you feeling nervous and anxious, or that you experienced a sudden anxiety attack or some kind of emotional disturbance that affected your health. If you resonate, relaxation is key. Also, it could be that you just realized you need to start therapy because you can´t deal with a problem on your own. The Tower in this pile may indicate muscle tension, stress, high blood pressure, grief, depression and spine problems for some of you. Im getting detoxing as well.

If you resonate with going through grief, pain, depression, heartbreak or a difficult emotional time, allow yourself to feel your emotions. Release them by crying, screaming, punching a pillow, writing, or whatever way is helpful to you. Acknowledge your hurt, your pain without getting lost in it. Practice gratitude. Reconnecting with nature is another good thing to do, since nature is something greater than ourselves and also incredibly beautiful, mesmerizing, and healing. As you can see in the picture you picked, grounding and walking in a forest is adviced. Get exposed to natural light and natural springs. Drink a lot of fluids, get enough minerals. Drink calming, soothing teas. Planning your health routines will be beneficial.

Lastly, take care of your joints by maintaining a good posture, moving your body and strenghtening your muscles.

Thank you for reading! Feel free to ask any questions, or leave any suggestions and corrections!

[inkblot22]

Truss

Woohoo Malleus woohoo! I'm making the trigger list a bit bigger because I keep thinking about how people will totally skip reading it if it's too small and then blame the writer for their own mistake. That shit is clown behavior but I don't want to be held responsible for someone else's case of stupid, so sorry to those of you who think this looks clunky. Line divider found here: @/cafekitsune. This is also a fic that is wildly self-indulgent, in that I mean that while writing I visualized my own physical form and quirks.

That being said, this fic is written with afab (assigned female at birth) readers in mind. No pronouns other than you are used for the reader, but the reader does possess a womb. Reader's chest is not described in the least, just the lower bits, and even then it's not at length. Malleus also refers to the reader as "beauty," but masculine people can be beautiful too so idk but here's a warning anyways.

This fic is DEAD DOVE, DO NOT EAT. TW for noncon, fae interaction rules used for said noncon, slight bullying if you squint, one (1) mention of blood (I'm beginning to think I have a problem.) Stay safe while reading. Possible OOC Malleus, I haven't read any of book 7 and if you spoil it I'll block you temporarily.

This is absolutely not your fault, and you don’t know what the fuck you’re doing. It’s awful. Crewel was for sure his namesake, because this whole thing was a steaming pile of-

Alright, from the top, just to organize your thoughts: you are the only non-magic student in a school of mages. The teachers are mages. Your best friend/roommate/monster friend is a mage. The plants here can do magic, but you? No. Thanks homeworld. Love the gift of nothing.

Thus, the faculty have seemingly created a game of “how to piss off and challenge the magicless student,” in which they give you various tasks to just make you lose sleep. Vargas had you running laps until your legs felt like jelly, doing pushups until your shoulders started sounding like glowsticks. Trein had you learning completely off the wall trivia, such as what type of fabric the Queen of Heart’s favorite bathrobe was made of and why it made her more powerful. That’s nothing, it’s easy because you apparently have so much free time in their eyes. But Crewel? Fuck that man. 

When you got the assignment, it sounded fun and exciting. He gave you seeds for a fast-growing rose thing. Honestly you weren’t paying attention to the name of it, but you retained what you needed to know. The plant only grew in moonlight, so you needed to cover it before you went inside at night. It needed a minimum of two hours of moonlight to grow per night. If the basket was overturned and it was exposed to the sun, then the plants would die. Moderate watering, no fertilizer, the usual.

Once the plants bloomed, you were supposed to take the flowers and make some kind of glamour potion, so here you are, failing at doing so. You only had four flowers, and you’re down to the last one. You wasted three tries and you still have no idea what the hell you’re doing wrong and it’s due next alchemy class and you’re breaking curfew on top of all of it. You glare into your cauldron with your latest failed attempt and hunker down to shoulder against the side so you can dump it out and try again. 

“Oh, it’s you.”

The voice makes you jump out of your skin. You turn around and you almost want to cry tears of joy, because if anyone can help you, it’s him.

“When I saw a little head duck down, I thought that something strange was happening. A crime, perhaps.” Malleus smiles, and it’s not a kind smile, but you’ll take anything remotely positive at this point, “What are you doing on the floor, child of man?”

“Oh, I have to empty the cauldron.” You puff out, still trying to throw your weight to push the cauldron. You did it twice earlier, so this must be the effects of mental and physical fatigue.

“Oh, that’s right. Allow me.” Rather than waving a hand or anything, Malleus strolls on over and uncrosses his arms, taking one hand and pressing his fingertips against the lip of the cauldron. The whole damn thing tips, the failed mixture pouring out into the nearby drain. With the same ease, he tilts it back and turns to you.

When he looks at you, it’s… weird. You know he’s lizard-like, as dragons evidently are, but even Sebek’s eyes aren’t this jarring. They aren’t soulless or cold or unfeeling, but it feels like he is looking through you. His emotions don’t reflect in his eyes properly. That’s what it feels like. They reflect, but it’s wrong. Fractured. His lips quirk into a smile and you blink.

“Uh… wait, what are you doing out here, Tsunotaro?” You ask, turning to gather more materials, following the transcript of your recording from class.

His smile grows, “Just on a walk. Will you tell me what you’re trying to make?”

“Uh, yeah. This glamour potion? I don’t know. Remember how I was growing those flowers?”

“Of course. And what happened to the rest?”

“I… uh… I messed up the other potions. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.”

“No?”

“No. Do… do you think you could maybe… help me?”

“Of course.” Malleus plucks the flower up, twirling it thoughtfully, “Why don’t you gather the other ingredients?”

That was simple enough. Petals from your tediously grown blooms, some kind of floral oil with tiny white flowers inked on the label, a ball of clay no bigger than a pea, something that really resembled a severed finger, something that was hopefully just someone’s baby tooth, a handful of crystals in a rainbow of colors, and water. Lots of water. Malleus watches as you put all your ingredients on the nearby table and hums thoughtfully before dimming the lights and turning back to you.

“And where did you hear that you needed these things?” He asks. It’s not something that he says with any indication that you’re right or wrong. The tone is bland but the words say enough. 

He has essentially told you before that he believes you inept, a babe in the woods when it comes to this sort of thing, but it doesn’t stop you from looking as hurt as you feel, “The headmage visited class and gave me some pointers?”

“You personally or the entire class? I don’t personally recall concocting anything like this when I was in your grade.” He says.

You suppose you’re grateful that he’s so blunt, but his flat tone makes the sting of your failure that much sharper. You thought he’d be nicer, since you two are sort of friends, and Lilia has told you that Malleus is fond of you, but it also makes just as much sense for him to refrain from easing up in his flatness because he supposedly thinks so much of you. He thinks you’re an idiot, but he’s not willing to treat you as such.

“The whole class. And no one else in my grade is doing this.” You mutter, staring at your assortment of items on the table.

He approaches the table and plucks up the beaker of water, twisting it in his hand, “Did you distill this?”

“What?”

“Tap water often has various minerals in it. If you haven’t been using distilled water, you’ve been adding an extra ingredient. Typically, most potions are much more forgiving and you can use tap water with little issue, but this particular potion is known to be disagreeable.” He murmurs, crossing the room with your beaker of water and setting it up to distill with a practiced ease. “That’s why it’s typically saved for fourth year students’ aptitude testing.”

The revelation hit you like a ton of bricks. You’d like to protest but it unfortunately makes sense. Malleus looks over at you, somewhat blandly, then turns around to face you, looking half concerned.

You answer his question before he can ask, “I didn’t… know that. I guess it’s my fault for being from a different world…”

His lips twitch into a smile, and for a moment you can see amusement in his eyes, fractured with the underlying coldness, “Oh, it isn’t. It may be your fault for failing to ask questions, but having someone who is unused to this type of work take on an advanced project is cruel.”

“You think so?” You ask, voice lilting with hope.

“Of course I do. Why you’re expected to make a potion of this caliber is beyond me.” Malleus states blankly.

“Uh, yeah. I- I don’t know either. But thank you for helping me!”

His expression flinches. It lasts for less than a second before it smooths into an odd grin. You’re not quite sure what that means, but you’re too happy to stop and think about it. The water finishes distilling and you carefully begin crafting, using the tips Malleus occasionally mumbles towards you. Don’t put that ingredient in yet, stir clockwise, you need to grind that up with the oil, don’t rush you have time, et cetera, et cetera, and then you have a gorgeous violet mixture, glimmering with a pearlescent golden sheen.

Your jaw drops. Somehow the few ingredients you threw together is enough to fill several bottles. Malleus is making a smug face as you rush to the shelves of empty bottles and choose several fluted bottles, quickly using a ladle to deposit the final, successful potion into the bottles. You’re so giddy with your success that you hardly notice as Malleus walks towards the door and locks it. But only hardly.

“What was that for?” You ask, not actually caring. You’re too happy to be worried.

“Oh, we’ll need privacy.” He responds.

That part confuses you enough into caring. You turn around from where you’ve safely wrapped the bottles and slipped them into your bag and shoot Malleus a frown, “Privacy? For what?”

Malleus doesn’t say anything. He walks over to the table and you feel your body stand up, void of your control, and stagger over to stand in front of him. If you were concerned before, you’re frightened now. Malleus looks down at you with his strange gaze and folds his arms.

“Wh-what’s happening?! Why can’t I move?”

“You really don’t know?” He asks. Something about his tone sounds mocking, but you’re certain he doesn’t mean it to be. It’s his version of sarcasm, he’s spoken to you like this before.

Your body hops up on the table, taking a seat, and Malleus turns to stand before you, looking down at you with a soft smile. You shift your hips- what the fuck is going on- and Malleus very gently hooks his hands in the pants of your dorm uniform.

Your dorm uniform is legit whatever the hell you want it to be, so it would change on the daily. Today it was a pair of jeans and a hooded jacket. He kneels to remove your shoes and stands back up, leaning close as he tilts your chin up. His breath fans over your lips.

“You didn’t tell me that you were so lovely beneath your clothes.” His hand on your chin shifted to your cheek, and his other hand laid flat on the table. “And… your smell is much stronger. Are you aroused?”

“You can’t just ask me that! I don’t know what you did but you’ve got to let me go.”

“I didn’t do anything. This is your doing.” He retorts, pecking your lips very chastely. 

“What are you talking about?” When he didn’t respond, instead pressing the tips of his hand that was on the table against your exposed sex, your heart jumps but your body doesn’t move. You can’t, “Don’t do that!”

“Lilia informed me that making someone climax is similar to binding someone to you.” He mumbles, kissing you again as his fingers slowly slip inside. “It makes them fall in love with you. Isn’t that the most binding contract of all?”

You don’t know why he isn’t listening, but even less than that, you don’t know why he thought you could handle two fingers, much larger than your own, penetrating you. You squeal, but your body is incapable of tensing. Malleus pulls back, looking at you in a soft confusion.

“What’s the matter with you?”

“With me? What’s wrong with you? That’s too many- it’s uncomfortable!”

He blinks at you and withdraws a finger, which feels much better. You sigh. If you’re going to be forced to do this, you may as well not get hurt in the process. You close your eyes and Malleus hums.

“Is this better? You’ll have to forgive me. I haven’t had a dalliance with a human before.”

“I- I don’t think I’ll be able to… to forgive you for this.”

“No?” You can hear his smirk and the squelching noise as he pumps his finger gets louder. He slips the second finger in again and the burn isn’t so bad as last time, “Well, maybe you can decide that for certain after the wedding.”

“The wedd-” You have to bite your tongue to keep from moaning. Your body leans back, laying on the table, and your gentle assailant curls his fingers, leaning forward to mouth at your neck, “There’s not gonna be a motherfucking wedding. You’re-”

You can hear his horn scraping against the table, “Hmm. I didn’t think you were so entitled. You’re squeezing around my fingers. Are you close?”

“No!” You’re a liar. A ragged gasp leaves your throat and you feel the drop in the pit of your stomach, the burst of euphoria traveling up your spine as his thumb presses against your clit.

Malleus laughs, then leans up off of you. The sound of clothing hitting the ground is the first and only warning you get, but you can’t move, so it might as well have been silent. You feel something on your stomach, coming up about a half inch below your belly button. It’s… almost cool to the touch. You would think it would be warmer, but it’s not. Your eyes round as you stare at the ceiling, and Malleus’s face leans into view, his eyes boring into yours as though he’s reading your thoughts.

“You’re very warm. I’ve always thought this. You must be boiling inside.”

“I- what?”

He doesn’t respond, leaning back up. You feel the velvety head of his cock press against your entrance and as much as you want to jolt away, you can’t move your body. You can’t even look down to see what he’s doing. Your lashes flutter as the stretch sets in, the pressure worse than his two fingers. It burns, especially along the bottom, where his weight lays heavy thanks to gravity. You’re capable of wincing and letting out a whine, but nothing else.

“H-hey, that- that hurts.” You babble.

“Does it? You are squeezing me like a vice. I’ll stay still for a moment so you can relax some. Let me know when it stops hurting.” It’s very peculiar. Although he speaks with an animated tone, his voice is often detached. You would think he’d have more emotion since he’s inside of you.

You blink rapidly and decide that now is as good a time as any to ask, “What the hell is happening?”

“Must you tease me so?” He responds, his voice tense.

“What? I’m not teasing you. I can’t move!”

“Of course you can’t. You only just bound yourself to my will.”

“I what?” You shout.

“What, did you think I enslaved you? I could have, when we first met. You’re too free, giving people your name, thanking them, taking gifts freely… it drives me mad.” You feel a flash of heat, something warm rolling against your skin, like standing too close to a gas stove, “And now I find that you didn’t even know? I didn’t think you were such a fool.”

“That’s just called being polite!” You protest. “Oh my god-”

“I suppose I can’t blame you, really. Relax, lest I harm you.” He murmurs, rolling his hips further as though he can slide in deeper. 

You squeak, “N-no, that’s-”

“Too much, yes. Tell me, in your world, do faefolk exist?”

“I- I mean, if they do, most people don’t believe in them.” The oddity of the situation felt like a blanket. Having a semi-conversation while your friend- not after this- used you as a dick holster. It was almost comforting. “I don’t- I don’t understand.”

His voice was deeper than normal, an underlying rasp to his voice, as though it was coming from somewhere deep in his throat, “I will explain. I’ll tell you anything you’d like to know. But after I explain, I will begin to move.”

“H-hey, no-”

His voice sounded choked, half strangled as he stifled a groan, “I apologize for not being clear earlier. Among the fae, verbal contracts are common and binding. You do not give someone your name. You wonder why I never directly gave you mine? It is a way to bind someone to your will. You do not accept gifts. Invitations are fine, but a gift is a sign that you owe someone something. My help- a boon- is a gift. Typically it is repaid with another kind turn. And, most importantly, you do not thank someone without the sufficient power to break their hold.” 

You felt him draw back, that wave of heat rolling over you again, and then he slammed forward. The slick noise and dull smack were muffled by your squeal, his cockhead punching your cervix like it stole from him.

“Foolish little thing. I suppose it makes you cute.” He sneers, and your body sits up, arms wrapping around his shoulders.

The angle makes his motion a bit less painful. He’s no longer bumping against your cervix, thank the Seven, but the stretch remains. Your eyes flinch shut and Malleus tilts your chin up to kiss you again.

“St-stop- stop!” You whimper, “You’re hurting me!”

“If you would relax, beauty, that would not be a problem.” His chuckle is dark, the squelching from your coupling making a wicked duet that makes you feel dizzy, “And you said it to me so easily as well. Thank me again.”

“Wh-” One of his hands slipped under your hips, holding your bottom just under the split in your cheeks, and nipped your neck as a flat thumping echoed from where your bodies met, your legs bouncing with the motion. His member had gone back to bullying your cervix, and you wailed in the hopes that he would stop, “Thank you!”

“Heh… it escapes your lips so freely. Tell me, beauty-” He cut himself off with a grunt, panting against the column of your throat. “Tell me, what is it that you’d like? I would give you the world on a platter, should you want it.”

“I- ow! Y-you’re hurting me!”

There was a possibility that he was getting off on the pain he was causing you, just as much as there was a possibility of him not understanding that he was hurting you. With every motion of his hips against yours, despite the wicked pain, you felt that ever evil tug in your gut, like a stone growing heavier and heavier. 

You tried again, because if this had to happen, if you were under his control now, you may as well not get injured. You would not be pissing blood if you could help it, “It’s too deep!”

He listened. It was odd, but he listened, his voice warming as he slid back a bit and continued ramming into you, but no longer beating the hell out of your internal organs.

“I didn’t realize. Is that better?” His voice sounded warmer, echoey against your shoulder. His teeth grazed over your skin again when you didn’t respond. He choked out your name and you sort of came back to yourself.

“U-uh- I guess?”

“Wonderful.” He mumbled, his free hand reaching between your bodies and slicked with your sweat, to tweak your clit.

It should be embarrassing, how quickly you reached your height. Whoever he had been with in the past couldn’t have been so sensitive, since you felt his body jerk against you, an uncontrolled undercurrent to his motions. You let out a quiet, squealing moan and barely even felt the break when Malleus bit you to muffle his own groan. You didn’t feel him climaxing inside of you. You felt the control return to your body and flopped backward onto the table, your hoodie damp with sweat. Malleus took a step back, then carefully redressed you, then himself. You looked up at him and saw nothing but adoration in his eyes, not the fractured appearance of such. It was like he was actually looking at you.

When he spoke to you, leaning forward to cup your cheek, his voice was warm, warmer than ever, “Now, let’s start planning for the wedding, my beauty.”

[greenwitchcrafts]

Smokeable herbs and flowers

WARNING

Smoking herbs itself is not a safe practice because smoking substances can cause damages to the lungs & respiratory system that can lead to bronchitis, lung cancer & other respiratory illnesses.

Organic, food safe herbs & flowers should be used if you choose to smoke these. Plants from garden centers, outside foraging in the city, ect may have pesticides or other unknown & possibly unsafe substances on them which make them no longer safe to consume.

•Some of these herbs burn harshly & would be better vaporized and/or in herbal blends. PLEASE LOOK UP HOW TO MAKE YOUR OWN HERBAL SMOKING BLENDS

Never under any circumstances should you ingest or inhale a new substance before checking with a medical professional, especially if you are taking medication. You could have negative reactions.

Blue Cornflower

Known as: Bachelor's button, bluebottle, blue bow, blew cap, garden cornflower & hurtsickle

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Saturn

Element: Earth

Magical attributes: Abundance, calming, divination, Earth magick, enhancing psychic abilities, faerie magick, fertility, love, protection & sex

Deities: Chiron, Faeries & Flora

Blue Lotus

Known as: Baino, Egyptian lotus & lotus root

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Moon

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Fertility, healing, lock opening, love, luck, meditation, mental clarity, passing over rituals, protection, spirituality & wishes

Deities: Hermes, Horus, Isis, Nefertum, Oshun & Osiris

Blue Vervain

Known as: Brittanica, enchanter's herb, enchanter's plant, herba sacra, herb of grace, herb of the cross, holy wort, Juno's tears, lemon verbena, pigeons grass, pigeonwood, simpler's joy, verbena, van-van & verveine

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Sun

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Abundance, astral binding, blessings to children, calming, chastity, creativity, divination, faerie magick, fertility, fortune, healing, love, luck, money, peace, prosperity, protection, purification, sleep, stimulates action, tranquil dreams, wand making & youth

Deities: Aphrodite, Aradia, Artemis, Bast, Cerridwen, Diana, faeries, Hecate, Hermes, Innana, Isis, Juno, Jupiter, Kali, Mars, Thor, Venus & Zeus

Cannabis

Known as: Chanvre, gallowgrass, ganeb, ganja, grass, hanf, kif, marijuana, neckweede, plant of the gods, taima, tekrouri, the tree of life & weed

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Saturn

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Commerce, exorcism, healing, love,meditation, protection, purification, spirt, travel & visions

Deities: Amaterasu & Sahe no Kami

( WARNING: will get you high.)

Calendula

Known as: Bride of the sun, marigold, ruddes, ruddles, summer's bride & sun's gold

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Moon

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Dreams, good luck in money, legal matters, prophetic dreaming, protection, psychic powers, respect, sun magick & wishes

Deities: N/A

(WARNING: can give a similar effect as smoking cannabis but more subtle)

Catnip

Known as: Cat, cat's play, cat's wort, catmint, catnep, catrup, field balm & nepeta nip

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Animal blessing, beauty, binding, cat magick, dreams, happiness, healing, love, luck, peace, psychic connection, quick action & sleep

Deities: Bast, Cat Annis, Corn Cat, Freya, Maftet, Skhmet & ubastet

Chamomile

Known as: Camomyle, chamaimelon, Earth apple, ground apple, heermannchen chamaimelon, maythen, manzanilla, scented mayweed & whig plant

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Sun

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Attraction, blockages removed, calmness, curse removal, gambling, hex breaking, love, luck, meditation, money, patience, purification, sexuality, sleep, spell combative & wealth

Deities: Cernunnos, Karnayna, Mercury, Oshun, Ra & St.Anne

Chrysanthemum

Known as: Mum

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Sun

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Protection & strength

Deities: N/A

Coltsfoot

Known as: Ass' foot, British tobacco, bulls foot, butterbur, coughwort, donnhove, dovedock, foal's foot, halffoot, horsehoof, pas d'ane & sponnc

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Animal magick, love, peace, prophetic dreams, prosperity, tranquility, visions & wealth

Deities: Brigid, Chiron & Venus

Damiana

Known as: Love leaf & Mexican Damina

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mars

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Aphrodisiac, astral travel, chakra opening, divination, love, lust, meditation, psychic powers, sex magick, spirt contact, tantric magick & visions

Deities: Artemis, Diana, Ganesha, Oshun, Pan, Vishnu & Zeus

(WARNING: smoking this will cause mild euphoria)

Eucalyptus

Known as: Blue gum, curly mallee, fever tree, maiden's gum, mottlecah, river red gum & stringy bark tree

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Moon

Element: Air & water

Magical attributes:  Abundance, blockages removed, fertility, fortune, healing, luck, prosperity, protection, repel negative energies, road opening & water elemental evocation

Deities: Ogun

( WARNING: should be smoked sparingly as the oils can irritate your lungs. Try vaporizing it.)

Gingko

Known as: Ginkgo biloba, living fossil & maidenhair tree

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Moon

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Aphrodisiac, beauty, business, dreams, fertility, healing, love & spirt calling

Deities: N/A

Goldenrod

Known as: Aaron's rod, blue mountain tea, goldruthe, gonea tea, solidago, sweet goldenrod, sweet scented goldenrod, verg d'or, wound weed & woundwort

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Divination, encouragement, find lost/hidden objects, luck, money, prosperity & wealth

Deities: Venus

Gotu kola

Known as: Chi-hsing, hydrocotyle asiatica radix, Indian pennywort, Indian hydrocotyle, marsh penny, pai kuo, thick-leaved pennywort & white rot

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mercury

Element: Air

Magical attributes: Aphrodisiac, calming, depression, divination, energy, gain, healing, longevity, lucid dreaming, meditation, memory, mental stimulation, psychic powers, psychic protections & vitality

Deities: N/A

Hops

Known as: Bee flower, beer flower, flores de cerveza, hop flower & stinging nettle

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mars

Element: Air

Magical attributes: Blessing, healing, health, repelling negativity, protection & sleep

Deities: Hygeia, Hypno, Isis & Thoth

Hyssop

Known as: Hyssop herb, isopo, ysopo & yssop

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Jupiter

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Banishing, blockages removed, faerie magick, hex breaking, protection, purification, road opening & sacrifice

Deities: Faeries & Obatala

Jasmine

Known as: Jessamin, moonlight on the grove, pikake, poet's jasmine, queen of perfume, royal jasmine, sampaguita, yeh-lsi-ming & ysmyn

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Moon & Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Abundance, anger reduction, aphrodisiac, aura health, calming, compassion, confidence, depression, divination, dreamwork, elegance, family, fertility, fortune, gardening, grace, healing, health, love, lucid dreaming, luck, lunar magick, meditation, money, peace, prophetic dreams, prosperity, protection, rejuvenation, sexuality, sleep, spirituality, spirtual love, visions & wealth

Deities: Diana, Venus & Vishnu

Kava kava

Known as: Asava pepper, ava, ava pepper, intoxicating pepper & yagona

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Saturn

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Aphrodisiac, astral travel, cleansing, dreams, employment, promotion, healing, humility, legal matters, loce, luck, protection, psychic powers, replenishing respect, rites of passage, soul strengthening, spirt contact, travel, visions & water magick

Deities: Kanaloa, Kane & Lono

( WARNING: some users indicated it may cause psychoactive, numbness and euphoria)

Lavender

Known as: Elf leaf, nard, nardus & spike

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mercury

Element: Air

Magical attributes: Chastity, clairvoyance, devotion, dreams, faerie magick, handfasting, happiness, healing, longevity, love, meditation, mental clarity, money, peace, protection, purification, sexuality, sleep, virtue & wishes

Deities: Aradia, Elves, Faeries, Hecate & Saturn

Lemon balm

Known as: Balm mint, bee balm, blue balm, cure-all, cropsy plant, garden balm, lemon balsam, oghoul, sweet balm & tourengane

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Moon

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Blockages removed, esbat rituals, healing, love, road opening, spirtual development, success sympathy

Deities: N/A

Lemon grass

Known as: Citron

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mercury

Element: Air

Magical attributes: Abundance, blockages removed, calming, fertility, fortune, luck, lust, prosperity, purification, psychic powers, road opening & soothing

Deities: Hermes & Mercury

Linden flowers

Known as: Lime blossoms, lime tree, linnaflowers & tilia

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Jupiter

Element: Air

Magical attributes: Immortality, love, luck, protection, sleep & spirtual health

Deities: N/A

Lobelia

Known as: Asthma weed, bladderpod, emetic herb, emetic weed, gagroot, Indian tobacco, pukeweed, rag root, vomit wort & wold tabasco

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Saturn

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Health, love, protection & storm halting

Deities: N/A

(WARNING: smoking too much may make you puke)

Marjoram

Known as: Joy of the mountain, knotted marjoram, knotted marjorane, marjorlaine, mountain mint, sweet marjoram & wintersweet

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mercury

Element: Air

Magical attributes: Attraction, desire, dreams, handfasting, happiness, health, joy, love, money, protection, purification, repelling negative energies & wishes

Deities: Aphrodite & Venus

Marshmallow leaf

Known as: Althea, guimavuve, heemst, mallards, mortification plant, schloss tea, slaz, sweet weed & wymote

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Saturn

Element: Earth

Magical attributes: Exorcism, love, protection & psychic powers

Deities: Althea

Motherwort

Known as: Lion's ear, lion's tail, Roman motherwort & throwwort

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Confidence, counter magick, easing childbirth, ego bolstering, feminine magick, feminine strength, fertility, happiness, joy, midwifery, perfection & success

Deities: Ogun

Mugwort

Known as: Artemisia, artemisia herb, cingulum, felon herb, muggons, naughty man, old man, old uncle Henry, sailor's tobacco, St.John's plant, sancti johannis

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus & Moon

Element: Earth

Magical attributes: Astral travel, clairvoyance, divination, fertility, healing, lust, prophetic dreams, protection, psychic powers, scrying & strength

Deities: Aida Wedo, Artemis, Diana, Isis, Lakshimi & St.John

Mullien

Known as: Aaron's rod, Adam's flannel, beggar's blanket, beggar's stalk, bug taper, blanket herb, blanket leaf, boy scouts toilet paper, candlewick plant,cow's lungwort, cuddy's lungs, devil's tobacco, duffle, feltwort, flannel flower, flannel plant, fluff weed, graveyard candles, graveyard dust, great herb, great mullien, hag's tapers, hare's beard, hedge taper, ice leaf, Jacob's staff, Jupiter's staff, lady's Foxglove, lungwort, miner's candle, pig taper, quaker rouge, rag paper, shepard's herb, shepard's staff, torches, torchwort, velvetback, velvet dock, velvet plant, white man's footsteps, witch's candles, witch's taper & wooly mullin

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Saturn

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Astral work, centering, courage, curse repellent, divination, dreams, exorcism, graveyard dirt, health, helps to keep a good head spsce, herd protection, Hunter's charm, love, protection to children from faeries, protection, repelling malicious ghosts & spirts, repelling negative energies, repelling nightmares & travel safety

Deities: Jupiter & Saturn

Nettle

Known as: beggar's lice, common nettle, nettle leaves, ortiga ancha & stinging nettle

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mars

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Consecration, exorcism, fishing magick, funerary rituals, healing, lust, protection & repelling negativity energy

Deities: Apollo, Chang-o, Helios, Oya, Ra, Shango & Thor

Passion flower

Known as: Granadilla, grandilla, maracoc, maypops, passion vine & purple passion flower

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Calming, friendship, peace, prosperity, sexual vitality, sleep & tranquility

Deities: Hestia, Hypnos & Yemaya

Peppermint

Known as: Brandy mint & lammint

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mars

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Abundance, divination, energy, fertility, fortune, healing, love, luck, lust, mental stimulation, prophecy dreams, prosperity, psychic powers, purification, sleep & visions

Deities: Pluto & Zeus

Raspberry leaf

Known as: European raspberry & red raspberry leaf

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Love, protection & safe pregnancy

Deities: Innana, Isis & Oshun

Red clover

Known as: Cleaver gras, cowgrass, honey, honeystalks, marl grass, shamrock, three leaved grass, trefoil & trifoil

Gender:Masculine

Planet: Mercury

Element: Air

Magical attributes: Abundance, anti-hexing, counter spells, exorcism, faerie magick, faithfulness, fertility, fidelity, fortune, hex breaking, love, luck, memory, money, power, prosperity, protection &success

Deities: Artemis, faeries, Osiris & Rowan

Red willow bark

Known as: Osier, pussy willow, saille, salicyn willow, saugh tree, tree of enchantment, witch's asprin & withy

Gender:  Feminine

Planet: Moon

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Astral work, besom making, death, divination, empathy, enchantments, fertility, healing, inspiration, love, moon magick, passion over rituals, psychic energies & wishes

Deities: Artemis, Belili, Belenus, Ceres, Diana, Hecate, Hera, Mercury & Persephone

Rose

Known as: N/A

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Abundance, beauty, clairvoyance, divination, dreams, feminine magick, fertility, fortune, friendships, handfasting, healing, love, luck, peace, prosperity, protection, psychic powers & visions

Deities: Adonis, Aphrodite, Aurora, Cupid, Demeter, Eros, Freya, Hathor, Holda, Hypocrites & Isis

Rosemary

Known as: Compass weed, dew of the sea, elf leaf, guardrobe, incsensier, labonotis,Mary's cloak, polar plant, sea dew, stella maria & star of the sea

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Sun

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Aphrodisiac, baby blessing, cleansing, elf magick, exorcism, faerie magick, friendships, handfasting, healing, hex-breaking, longevity, love, lust, memories, mental powers, protection, psychic powers, purification, sleep, strega magick, Wiccaning & youth

Deities: Elves, Faeries, Sea spirits & Virgin Mary

Sage

Known as: Common sage, garden sage & meadow sage

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Jupiter

Element: Air

Magical attributes: Animal guides, aphrodisiac, blockages removed, cleansing, courage, Earth magick, fertility, glamour, grounding, healing, hex breaking, house blessings, immortality, longevity, prosperity, protection, purification, road opening, strength, wisdom & wishes

Deities: Chiron, Consus, Jupiter, Obatala & Zeus

Salvia

Known as: N/A

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Binding, love & memories

Deities: N/A

( WARNING: Can cause psychoactive effects)

Skullcap 

Known as: American skullcap, blue pimpernel, blue skullcap, European skullcap, greater skullcap, helmet flowers, hooded willow herb, hoodwort, scullcap, quaker bonnet, mad-dog weed, mad dogweed, madweed & side-flowering skullcap

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Saturn

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Dedications, fidelity, handfasting, initiation rights, love, oaths, peace & relaxation vows

Deities: Faeries, Hera & Obatala

Spearmint

Known as: Brown mint, fish mint, garden mint, green mint, green spine, lamb mint, mackerel mint, mismin, our lady's mint. Sage of Bethlehem, spire mint & yerba buena

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Healing, love, mental ability, money, psychic powers & wishes

Deities: Mercury

St.John's wort

Known as: Amber, fuga daemonum, goat weed, herba John, John's wort, kalimath weed, klamath weed, scare-devil, sol terrestis & tipton weed

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Sun

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Binding, divination, happiness, health, hex-breaking, love, power, protection & strength

Deities: Baldur

Tarragon

Known as: N/A

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mercury

Element: Air

Magical attributes: Consecration, compassion magick, goals, healing &l lasting interest

Deities: Lilith

( WARNING: Some users reported hallucinatory effects)

Tobbacco

Known as:  Asemaa, taaba, tabacca & tabak

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mars

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Astral, banishing, confidence, divination, dreams, healing, legal matters, peace, prophecy, purification & strength

Deities: N/A (However, it is a traditionally good offering to many)

Tulsi

Known as: Brush leaf , holy basil, Thai basil & vana tulsi

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mars

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Abundance, banishing, binding, clairvoyance, commanding courage, divination, exorcism, fertility, flying, fortune, happiness, harmony, health, honesty, house blessings, love, luck, mending quarrels, money, obstacles removed, passing-over rituals, peace, prosperity, protection, psychic development, purification, relaxation healing, safe travels, sympathy, temper soothing & wealth

Deities: Aradia, Ares, Dionysus, Erzulie, Jupiter, Krishna, Loki, Mars, Obatala, Ogoun, St.Joseph, Seth & Vishnu

Uva ursi  

Known as: Arberry, bearberry, bear's grape, bear's whortberry, crowberry, foxberry, hog cranberry, kinnikninnick, mealberry, mountain box, mountain cranberry, sandberry, uva ursa & universe vine

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Moon

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Astral work, divination, dreams, prophecy & psychic workings

Deities: N/A

( WARNING: Some historical reports indicate a “narcotic” or stimulant effect, but it was almost always smoked with other herbs)

Valerian

Known as: All heal, amatilla, bloody butcher, capon's trailer, cat's valerian, garden heliotrope, graveyard dust, phu, red valerian, St.George's herb, sete well, setwell, valerian toot & vandal root

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Venus

Element: Water

Magical attributes: Dream magick, harmony, love, protection, purification, quarrel mending & sleep

Deities: Obatala

Wormwood

Known as: Absinthe, crown for a king, green ginger, madderwort, old woman & wormot

Gender: Masculine

Planet: Mars

Element: Fire

Magical attributes: Animals, calling spirits, clairvoyance, divination, love, protection, psychic powers & transformation

Deities: Aida Wedo, Artemis, Diana, Innana, Iris, Isis, Lakshimi & Sif

Yarrow 

Known as: AchiUea, allheal, angel flower, arrow root, bad man's plaything, bloodwort, cammock, carpenter's weed, death flower, devil's mustard, devil's nettle, devil's plaything, dog daisy, eerie, feild hops, gearwe, gordaldo, gordoloba, green arrow, herbe militaris, hierba de las cortadura, hundred leaved grass, knight's milfoil, knyghten, lady's mantel, milfoil, military herb, millefoilium, noble yarrow, nosebleed plant, old man's mustard, old man's pepper, plumajilo, sanguinary, seven year's love, snake's grass, soldier's thousand seal, soldier's woundwort, squirrel's tail, stanch grass, stanch weed, tansy, thousand-leaf, thousand seal, thousand weed, woundwort, yarrowway & yerw

Gender: Feminine

Planet: Saturn & Venus

Element: Earth & water

Magical attributes: Attracting friends, banishing, blockages removed, contact with others, courage, divination, dream work, exorcism, faerie magick, fear repelling, handfasting, happy marriage, healing, longevity, love, prophecy, protection, psychic powers, purification, repelling negative energies & road opening

Deities: Achilles, Aphrodite, Faeries, Oshun & Yemaya

Sources:

Llewellyn's Complete Book of Correspondences by Sandra Kines

Wikipedia

A Witch's Book of Correspondences by Viktorija Briggs

The Encyclopedia of Natural Magic** by John Michael Greer

Wild Witchcraft by Rebecca Beyer

Plant Witchery by Juliet Diaz

A Compendium of Herbal Magick by Paul Beyerl

The Herbal Alchemist Handbook by Karen Harrison

The Book of Flower Spells by Cheralyn Darcey

[lazyneonrabbitt]

Unconventional couples and their necessary assistance spells: Inked Sigils.

Werewolf!Daryl Dixon x Witch!Reader SMUT 🔞

Fate brought you together, spells finally brought you family.

"G'ahh fuck it hurts.." Your pained voice dragged throughout the cabin.

"Quit yer squirmin', ya got this." Daryl's stern voice made a point, you had to pull through and that last move almost hurt you more than both of you would have liked. His rough hands held your body in place as he spoke encouraging words. "Yer so strong."

You sniffled and hiccupped through the hurt. "Daryl, I can't.." Your eyes went from his worried ones to the blood covered sheets you laid on, your body bare in front of your lover.

"Yer gonna pull through, know it hurts ya but yer gonna be happy later." His hand moved back to your lower belly, rubbing soothing circles against the skin before whispering a soft 'sorry'and returning to his previous actions.

He took the large needle from the bowl next to him. The liquid it was drenched in a combination of yours and his blood mixed with different kinds of herbs and ingredients that held magical properties when combined.

His large hand held your skin taut as he started carefully copying the design from the spellbook that laid beside him.

You two had found each other by accident, both spotting that same cabin and hoping to call it home. Both having nowhere else to go and noone to go to, you decided to share and see how it'd go. You could both feel the others' ties to the moon and felt that the mutual connection helped you in becoming friendly. Starting with him keeping you safe from the dead as you performed a full moon cleansing ritual, and you cooking up some remedies to sundue the pains of changing shape under that same moon and rubbed ground up healing herbs onto his wounds whenever healing them on his own took too much energy.

It wasn't long before you were sharing a bed together during the nights, and a nest under the full moon, cuddled up in furs and pelts.

You sat down to discuss something which neither of you had disclosed details of. But as it turned out you had the same plan. You wanted a child with the other.

But that proved to be more of a challenge than you had expected it to be as many moons had passed and you still weren't carrying his offspring. No matter what lycantrophic full moon rituals you performed or fertility spells you put both you and Daryl under, nothing seemed to work.

It broke your spirit to disappoint your lover like this, to be unable to give him what he desired. But it broke his heart even more to find the bed empty when he awoke at night, seeing you huddled up at the fireplace, surrounded by piles upon piles of books and scrolls that maybe held the answer to your troubles.

Even when he had held you close night after night whispering it wasn't bothering him and he still loved you just as much you wouldn't give up.

And then you stumbled on the ritual you were currently performing. From a book you had shoved aside time and time again because it had this strange vibe around it.

You sat down with Daryl to look the ritual over and both agreed to try and to not quit halfway through.

With each prick of the drenched needle you felt the spell binding to your organs. The book spoke of pain but you never expected it to be this bad..

Breathing heavy and biting down on an old rag you tried to focus on the future and distract yourself from the hurt for as long as Daryl needed to finish the sigil on your lower stomach.

He watched you struggle to stay outstretched, your body practically begging to curl up and hide. The words he kept repeating to you like a calming mantra seemed to help just enough to sit through the remaining time without needing another break.

The sigil was done, the unfamiliar surge you felt made that clear enough and you let out a sigh of relief, knowing this torture was over.

He took the utmost care with cleaning up any mess and making sure you were comfortable the whole time but not liking the dark veins spreading from the fresh sigil and seemed to disappear deep into your body.

By the second your skin was cleared of any residue you snatched the book to refresh your memory of the next step. Inspecting the pages you hummed at the simplicity of the next step. "Says we fuck now," you state simply. "When the initial discomfort of placing the sigil is over, you body is prepared to carry offspring of whichever lifeform you lay with." Quoting the page's words to your partnerwho was setting the bowl and needle aside.

"Ya sure that discomfort's gone? I know yer excited but--" His question was interrupted by you frantically grabbing for the basket of bloody rags and hurling, emptying your stomach into it.

Tears falling as you curled into yourself and shrieked in pain.

Daryl was on you in seconds trying to find the source of your discomfort as you cried in his arms. His free hand ran over the book to read over the spell once again, but it said nothing about this much pain after the sigil placement. All it did was give a general pain warning at the start.

"M'okay. P.. promise." Steadying your breaths took a moment but you fought through the pain. He laid you down to get some water when he stopped dead in his tracks.

Daryl sensed a shift in the air. Your scent was changing. A fast, drastic change that almost forced him to shift right where he stood. All he could do was breathe in the scent of a female wolf begging to be bred and he could feel his human shape starting to give way as his nails formed into claws and a growl slipped past large fangs.

He dropped to his knees as the change washed over him and resisting you became even harder.

You noticed him shift and gathered the strength to look over, only to find staring at you like a piece of meat, pawing at his hard cock.

You wrote his behavior off as a side effect of the spell, and with no time to prepare, gave him the okay as most of the pains had faded to just a dull ache.

"S'okay.." You gave him the most genuine smile you could manage and braced yourself for the claws you expected to tear into you like the last time he was this feral.

But the claws never came.

They placed beside you as he hovered over you and took his time working himself into you with slow thrusts untill he had his ready swollen knot pressed against your spread lips.

He lapped at your tears until he felt the soft press of your hips against his, and set off at a less calm pace.

With each of his thrusts you felt the stab of the sigil deep inside of you and begged it was a good sign. Daryl's large paw reached to rest on your stomach and you feared for pain that never came. Yoir skin had healed over so you went back to focusing on the delicious drag of Daryl's large member against your walls and the pad of his finger that had found yoir clit. He could feel your discomfort and tried to finish as quickly as possible, rubbing at your sensitive nub to get you off and squeeze around his cock to help him over the edge too. It took him only a few more thrusts before he started lapping at your back and thrusted hard into you, locking his knot inside and filling you with his seed.

His cum burned hot against your walls, feeling him empty himself inside of your womb and leaving you with a slight swell after he had calmed and laid down with you.

Daryl still wasn't sure how he felt about you going through all this pain, but all he could do was hold you close and make sure you were comfortable. Your back was pressed against his and his large frame curled adound you. One paw rested underneafh his head while the other one reached out to take your hand in his and rest them together over your stomach, silently praying to the moon he shared so many nights with, to let this pain be worth it in the end.

Only when he was entirely certain you were fully asleep he reached for the book again. There were no further steps or notes for the spell. They were done so all there was to it now was wait for signs of it taking.

Somewhere during the night he shifted back into his human form and covered you both in a large blanket and sleep some more. He had made sure to stock up on food so there was no need to leave your side, so he wouldn't unless you'd ask him.

The next day Daryl was in what you had started to refer to as 'guard dog mode'. Wether in his human form or not he'd hover around you, sniffing around for any changes and looking for any discomforts to the point of you smacking him on the forehead with the soup spoon. "Daryl." Your whole demeanor still groggy from yesterday. "Eat your deer at least three feet away from me please." You were seated next to the fireplace to stay nice and warm while you recovered, and Daryl was next to you as he was roasting deer over the fire that heated your soup earlier.

With a grumble he moved aside, looking likr a defeated child at the other end of the decorative rug gou salvaged soon after you officially started living together.

"Oh come on. Don't sulk like that, baby." If he'd be in his shifted form right now he'd be giving you huge puppy eyes and soft whines. "Jus' wanna touch ya." He spoke quietly, reminding you of fhe one thinv he'd tell you every single time he bred you. "First fourty-eight hours are important fer our kind."

He was right. You were closing in on the twenty-four hour mark and he still hadn't sensed a change in your scent. Maybe this spell didn't work either. Maybe witches and werewolves just weren't meant to mix.

He noticed the change in your posture and glanced over, quickly understanding what was going on. Again.

Every try, without fail you'd become discouraged after the first day of Daryl not telling your scent changed.

"Ya still got time." He reached out his hand, hoping you'd accept it. He'd also hoped his prayers were heard last night and everything was just setting in slow.

You saw Daryl's outstretched hand and placed yours on top of it, giving him a soft smile before skillfully lifting your bowl of soup and slurping up the last bit.

"I believe you, Dee." You squeezed his hand in yours. "It's just my head being loud, I shouldn't listen to it." Shaking your head at yourself you set down your bowl and rolled onto your back, staring at the ceiling and then back at Daryl who was still gnawing the last bits of meat off a piece of bone.

"Wha'cha want?" He looked at you on the floor with a brow raised in question.

"Maybe we should just pluck a feral dog off the street and keep it." You looked at him in the corner of your eye, waiting for a reaction but he gave none besides a huff of disbelief.

"What?" You laugh as you roll onto your side. "A cute German Sheperd. Or maybe some kind of terrier if those are even still around?" You kept your eyes on his and shrugged. "Would be cute."

He rolled his eyes at you and let out a breathy laugh as he accused you of messing with your soup and that being the reason for your stupid ideas.

"Or maybe I'm trying to stay in a maternal mindset. Who knows what emotions do to bodily spells."

Neither of you had any idea about it. You tried this one out of pure desperation because honestly you were tired of failing.

"Ya think goin' for 'nother round's gonna up the chance?"

You gave it a thought and shrugged, sitting up and moving over to him. "At least it'll kill some time and help us fall asleep."

Daryl tossed the bone near your bowl and laid down on his back, watching as you straddled his hips and rubbed yourself on his clothed cock. A pleased hum escaped his lips as his grabbed at the hem of his pants and shoved them down when you lifted your hips to adjust your position.

"Eager are we?" He mused with his hands now on your hips, underneath the soft fabric of your robe that you wore with nothing underneath. He guided your hips at a slow pace as you felt him getting harder with every stroke until you felt he was slicked up enough to press into you. With one smooth motion he was all the way inside of you.

You needed a second to adjust but quickly set a steady pace riding him with your hands on his chest for balance.

You kept note of his sounds as you selfishly chased your own high, not needing long before toppling over the edge and squeezing your walls around his length and making him groan. His hands moved up to hold you steady as he set a brutal pace to finish himself off as well.

He had stilled for a moment before you noticed he was still just as hard as before and experimentally wiggled your hips again, leaning down to kiss him as you lifted yourself off him only to sink down again.

He let out a deep moan as you sank down on his still sensitive cock and grabbed a hold of you to keep your head next to his. "Yer really into it tonight, huh." You felt a grin form against the shell of your ear as he spoke, his hands again sneaking his way to your hips and grabbing them in a bruising hold. "Looks like you are too, baby." If you had to go off the grip on your hips he wasn't gonna go easy on you. He had lifted you ever so slightly to get the right angle and rut into you from below at a harsh pace, having you moaning into the crook of his neck. He hit that spot inside of you with every skilled thrust and had you coming around his cock once, twice before he spilled deep inside you for a second time.

You both needed a moment to breathe before either could even speak.

"Wanna go slow before bed?" Daryl's gruff voice wondered with a soft roll of his hips to accentuate the question.

"Hmhm.. yeah." You lifted your upper body off his to lazily roll your hips against his, enjoying the feeling of him inside you.

Daryl met your hips with his each time, admiring your figure above him.

You followed the movements of his hands as they undid the bindings on your robe and letting it fall open at your sides so he could admire your beautiful body.

His gaze fell onto the sigil still visible on your body and wondering if it'd fade after the pup was born.

He imagined you eight weeks from now, nice and round, the sigil following the curve of your belly as you laid resting in the nest he had built for you.

His lazy thrusts kept up a nice rythm along with yours, soft breaths leaving you both as you enjoyed the closeness. There was no need to finish anytime soon, and you could just as wel keep up the soft rythm until you both got muscle cramps and then go to sleep.

Which is exactly what you did. Your legs were the first to give out with a tired huff and a fit of giggles while Daryl's hips kept going for a bit after, letting you sit on his as he rolled his hips a few more times before stilling.

"Sleep?"

"Sleep."

----

After cleaning yourselves up Daryl took you in his arms and led you to bed, peppering you with kisses as he tucked you in so he could go put the fire down to just a smolder before disappearing underneath the blankets as well. As he laid next to your sleeping frame he couldn't help but sniff at you, just to see.

He sniffed once, twice and he could swear you smelled different than before.

As careful as he could be he lifted the blankets to get more access and he was sure now. Inside of his mind he howled in celebration.

He had only one problem. You were in deep sleep already, and waking you has proven time and time again to be something very dangerous.

He'd tell you in the morning.

----

You rose with the sun, as any other day. But today Daryl woke with you.

"What's got you awake so early, baby? Bad sleep?" You were already brewing yourself tea when he came up behind you, hugging you close with his hands protectively over your lower stomach.

"Words, Daryl." Your free hand reaches up to scratch his scalp, earning you a soft hum before he spoke.

"Congrats, momma."

With one hand he took the cup from your hands and with the other he turned you around, revealing the smile he had been unable to hide.

You didn't even have time to question him before his lips were on yours, giving you the most love filled kisses you'd ever gotten.

Whwn he stopped to take a breath you could have sworn there were tears in his eyes and everything suddenly clicked in your hazy morning brain.

"Holy shit." Wide eyes stared up at Daryl's bright blue ones. "For real? It worked?" Your voice got more excited with every word and Daryl happily nodded his head. "Yeah it did." He laughs as he pulls you into a giant bear hug, lifting you off the ground before placing you down again. With your body released from his grasp your hands flew to the large shirt you wore, lifting up the hem all.the way to tuck it under your chin as you looked down like you were expecting to see change already.

Of course you knew you wouldn't see anything on the outside for another few weeks, but still you stared. Daryl had sniffed it out when he woke up so it had to have worked. There was a tiny little being growing inside of you.

The two of you celebrated in your own way. Spending all day curled up in each other's embrace and preparing a feast for dinner before spending the evening in front of the fireplace, talking about all kinds of nothing until sleep took you both.

You felt rested the next day. Happy and confident you wouldn't turn into a puddle of doom and gloom, as Daryl called it before he left to hunt.

With him out of the cabin for at least a few hours you decided to clean up, get your dried herbs in the correct jars and plan which ones to plant next.

You hung some pelts out on the porch to air and fluffed up the bed.

The fireplace got cleaned out too and got new firewood in it and Daryl's nest was properly arranged again as well.

You stood and stared at it, letting your mind wander to his large beast form holding you close as your little furry half wolf pup slept in your arms. That was the life, gou were so ready for this and couldn't help but want to throw the whole place around and pup-proof your home.

But Daryl would probably curse you out if he found you doing any lifting at all. So you stuck to rearranging your little kitchenette.

You were cleaning off the suncatcher Daryl had gifted you when you spotted his figure appear from the woods.

A wave let you know he had spotted you as well as he made his way back to the house.

He had caught some smaller animals, bringing his catch inside to proudly show off and going back out to prep them.

"Hey, Dee?" He looked up from where he sat on the porch, chewing on what you guessed was raw meat.

"Can you cut up that squirrel for me? I wanna add some meat to the soup."

"Tha' one?" He pointed the knife at the one he was currently gutting, and continued his job when you confirmed.

"Thankyou, love." You stepped up to him and kissed his head and took his pack off fhe floor and took it inside.

He had been so kind to look out for any edible greens that grew near the farmland not too far off, so now you had greens to add to your currently still very bland soup.

Daryl made sure his work was done before losing daylight, bringing you your requested meat and prepping the rest for later.

After dinner you took the aired out pelts back inside and added them back to the bed and nest and spending another evening huddled up together.

Time passed slow now that you were waiting for your belly to show, but today was herbal remedies day for Daryl. The full moon was coming up and it never stopped affecting him negatively.

After the first two moons being miserable for him you decided to brew him something special. It was a tryout the first time, giving him a slightly different blend of herbal tea each night of the moon and letting him decide which one worked best.

On the third full moon cycle your remedy was close to perfect and even though he hated the taste he didn't want to go without your remedy ever again.

You had a pot of water over the open fire to boil before you put the sachel of herbs in it and let it simmer for a bit while you ate dinner.

"After all them years ya still haven't tried ta make it somewhat tasty." The grimace on Daryl's face was never one you wanted to miss. You'd apologise every time but all the tastiest herbs would screw with the effectiveness of the brew. "Medicine is never tasty, love." You gave him am apologetic smile and took the cup from him as he got ready to head out to the woods for the night.

You'd always sleep with the curtains open on these nights. You knew he'd sometimes returned to the porch and wanted to see you.

Three days went like this each month. When the moon was gone again Daryl came back, rested a lot and after dinner he'd drink his herbal medicine and set off again a little later.

After the full moon nights passed you'd let your lover sleep for a full day while you cooked up a nice meaty stew for when he woke up. He was always so hungry.

But so were you now, so that stew was a welcome meal that you now decided to make more often. You thought of suggesting keeping a forever stew going during your pregnancy since you ate so much more now.

A soft groan came from behind you as Daryl woke up from his day and a half long slumber, sniffing the air and humming happily. "Ya always spoil me, lil' witch."

Sharing a nice meal as first thing after waking up was important to Daryl, and now even more as he took only one bowl of stew and had you laid against his chest. Two spoons in the bowl of stew as Daryl sat down in the nest with his back against the wall and pulling your back flush against him.

Was it the most convenient way to eat? Not really, but it worked out and any time spent cuddled up with your partner was time spent well.

As time passed you shared the little celebrations of your favorite pair of trousers not closing anymore, your old sports bra no longer fitting nkcely and eventually your belly showing through the loose, flowy dresses.

It was getting more difficult for Daryl to keep his hands off you, almost begging for you to walk around in sweats and a cropped shirt of his so he had easy access to rub your belly and feel the pup kick.

The last full moon before your due date was only a few days before it and Daryl had stated multiple times he'd prefer to stay home, hide from the moon and stay human. He tried once before when suffering from a bad case of food poisoning and being too weak to shift properly and it took a toll on his mental health. All the way to the point of you feeding him a mixture of herbs that forced him to shift and sent him away to get his head sorted. You couldn't do that ever again.

He had reluctantly taken your remedy and left, but staying close to the cabin.

His howls were clear enough to know he had barely gone past the tree line and sure enough you spotted a moving figure on your porch not long after.

Daryl barely left the porch those three nights. He'd go out, change, eat and come back to sleep on the porch in case you'd need him. Even his day long sleep was cut short.

"Cuz I slept a lot the last nights" was his argument, but you knew he wanted to be awake in case your labor came early. "Werepups are unpredictable." He'd say.

You were convinced Daryl was more worried than you were when your due day came and went with nothing more than a few strong kicks. He had barely left your side that day, on you any time you felt a kick. You tried to sleep as much as possible, making sure to keep up your food intake and drinking enough during the day and spent all your time huddled next to the fire, at the edge of the nest that had been thoroughly prepared for the pups.

Another day and a half had passed, the sun now high above the cabin as the pains had gone from kicks to full contractions.

Daryl had you laid out on an old blanket within seconds and was fumbling through your jars of herbs with no knowledge of even what to look for. "Which one's the painkiller again?" He held up different jars hoping to make sense of the labels but all of them just held names, not uses. He was clueless and it sucked.

"Babe, it's in the rack next to the fireplace." You couldn't help but laugh at his panic in between pains. "Don't need it yet. Just put the water back on the flame so it heats up."

You would have done it yourself but you knew Daryl was gonna snap at you doing anything besides laying down and breathe.

It was night by the time you were taking your painkillers, the only source of light being the fireplace and some candles as you worked hard to push your pup out.

Daryl was so supportive, following any and all snappy order you threw his way and had his hands in any and all needed places like second nature. The soothing salve you had made tingled at his fingertips as he rubbed it over your belly with the most gentle movements.

With his help and your brewed works your pup was born without complications. But you weren't given much of a breather as the second pup followed quickly after. By the time both were born the sun just peeked above the horizon.

You tiredly stared at Daryl while he cleaned the pup's fur before placing her next to her brother on your chest.

Your eyes kept going from your pups that were quietly nursing, to your loving partner who was cleaning up and lovingly staring at you in between actions. You had been gently moved off the now soaked blanket and onto clean furs so the old ones could be taken out. You and the pups should be comfortable, nothing else mattered.

You were slowly dozing off by the time Daryl had come back inside taking a bowl of stew for himself, but not without offering you some as well. "To keep yer strength up."

You managed to get a few bites in your system before eating became too much of an effort and all you wanted was sleep.

Daryl was all too excited to come lay down next to you and take the pups into his arms.

He had chosen to rest in his shifted form to keep you and the pups warm, making sure to give you an extra blanket to cover your nude form.

That night he barely slept. His gaze focused on the steady rise and fall of your chest and the pups' occasional squirming.

He thought he had found true happines when fate brought you two together. But being here now, curled around the love of his life and his children he felt like he finally had everything he could ever wish for.

Well, that was untill after the pups had grown a bit and you were looking back on the rough path you had to take to get them.

"You know," strips of meat hung off your fingers for your pups to snatch away. "I'd be happy to do it all over again, with you by my side."

A/N: okay I tried to find any tattoo pic that wasn't skinny white girl, but this was the closest I got after millions of tramp stamps, pierced belly buttons and ugly designs.

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

Vesuvia Weekly: Guilty Pleasures (poorly doodled)

Julian

Likes his food very, very salty, and in an effort not to be a burden on anyone who cooks for him, carries at least one pouch or shaker of salt around in his coat. It doesn't matter who cooked it or what the dish is, it's the same routine every. Freaking. Time. He takes one bite, exclaims over how delicious it is, pulls out his pouch, shakes at least half a teaspoon over it, and eats the rest with gusto.

You have tried to confiscate it before important dinner events. It's impossible to find and only resulted him suggesting a body search.

Asra

Gets the midnight munchies like clockwork and it's the only thing about them that follows a predictable schedule. It doesn't matter how much or little he's eaten that day or how busy he's been or what he's been up to - the clock chimes twelve, he pauses whatever he is (or isn't) doing, and the stove salamander prepares itself to assist him in crafting some new culinary abomination. You're welcome to join in!

You did try locking all the food in the pantry once to see what they would do. His response was to playfully threaten to eat you instead

Nadia

Has an obsession for things that go "click". The keys on her parlor pipe organ. The little gears and cogs she tinkers with in her free time. The jewels on the hairpieces she wears over her ears. One time you accidentally burned through half her day because she stopped by while you were threading charmed beads, and she was so hypnotized by the cathartic swishes and clicks she missed three meetings.

You did try taking her to a factory with lots of loud clicks in it, only to find out that it was the wrong type of click and she needed to leave

Muriel

Loves squishy things he can sink his hands into so much he's convinced he's not allowed to enjoy them. Thick moss. Large, spongy mushrooms. Soft, dense furs that have just been shaken and fluffed out. It's so hard not to call him catlike on cleaning days, because his response to the furs that have hung in the breeze and sunlight all day is to sit down, sink his palms in, and knead for several minutes.

Once he found a part of your body with enough flesh on it for the soft skin to well up between his fingers, and he fixated on it for a week

Portia

Likes sniffing coffee beans when she needs a pick-me-up. She hates the bitterness of the flavor of it, and she doesn't need the level of caffeine that drinking it would give her, but the smell of freshly ground coffee beans is exactly the afternoon boost she craves. You didn't know about this until you walked in one day, just in time to see her enthusiastically faceplant into a bowl of them with a loud snort.

Nobody knows what she does with the beans after she's ground and sniffed them. You suspect she uses them as garden fertilizer

Lucio

At first you're convinced he doesn't have any guilty pleasures because he simply doesn't feel guilt for a good time in the first place. You are wrong. On the rare occasion that he fully removes his prosthetic, he likes doodling a pair of googly eyes onto what's left of his shoulder and making it "argue" with the hand on his metal arm. They're named "Willy" and "Spikes" and have their own voices.

You walked in on this once when you stopped to have the elbow piece fixed, to Lucio sitting shirtless on the floor debating cookie flavors

[topguncortez]

A Gift To Remember || Whumptober Day 10 - B. Floyd

whumptober masterlist

synopsis: you and bob had been trying for a long time to start a family of your own. and right when you start to see the light at the end of the tunnel, it gets snuffed out

@ailesswhumptober prompt: abandoned

word count: 2.4k

warnings: mentions of pregnancy, mentions of miscarriages, failed IVF, mentions of female anatomy, cursing, grammar errors.

You wanted to cry. The hot tears behind your eyes held both the excitement and fear you had been holding in for the past three minutes. You tried your best to not look at the ticking black dots on the small screens as you waited. It was only driving you crazier, but you couldn’t look away either. Everything that you had been waiting and praying for was about to be determined in a matter of seconds.

It had been three years of being treated like a human science experiment. Three years of being told your chances of conceiving were slim to none. Three years of doctor’s appointments, spreading your legs so some doctor could take a swab of your uterus to test the thickness of the lining. You didn’t even know that was something that had to be done. The lining of your interior organ was too thin apparently, not suitable for an embryo to latch itself onto. Three years of being treated like a pincushion, dropping your pants for Bob to inject you at the same time, in the same spot, every day. Three years of tears and failed transfers because your body decided to not do the one thing you were put on this planet to do.

Bob never blamed you. He had supported you, holding your hand through all the procedures and tears shed. He was right by your side, making sure you took your meds, that you were mentally okay, and injecting your thigh with hormones. Bob was your rock, always staying strong as you were broken after every “failed” appointment.

But your most recent transfer had been a success. Your lining was thick enough and your doctor went ahead with the transfer, transferring one of the three fertilized embryos. Bob held your hand tightly, watching the screen as the doctor implanted the egg into you. He had stayed up for hours, talking to your belly, encouraging them to grow, as if they could hear him, or if they had even stuck. It had been over two months since the transfer when you had started noticing the small changes. The constant headaches, the nausea, and the achy breasts were all signs you normally got but the one that stood out to you was the lack of a menstrual cycle. You had sprinted to the drug store, buying a 3 pack of Clearblue pregnancy tests and a bottle of water.

The small screens were haunting you as the words read back. The wording ingraining into your eyes: POSITIVE. All you could do was grab onto the sink to stop you from collapsing. They had never said that before, they were always negative. Not once did you ever get back a positive pregnancy test. You let out a squeal of excitement, covering your mouth as you cried.

The sound of a car door slamming shut, had you turning your head to the closed bathroom door. You could hear Bob greet your dog: Bosco as he came in. You quickly grabbed all three pregnancy tests and ran down the hall. Bob smiled as he kneeled down to pet his dogs and noticed your frantic running down the stairs.

“Whoa babe where’s the. . . “ All you could do was hold the pregnancy tests up, as Bob’s eyes did his best to read them, “. . . fire. Are those positive?”

“They’re positive!” You smiled big. Bob stood up from the ground and ran over to you on the stairs, taking all three in his hand.

“Oh my god. . . oh my god! They’re positive! Oh my god!” Bob yelled and threw his arms around your middle hugging you tightly. He kissed your cheek and nuzzled his head into your neck, letting his own tears fall down his face.

He had been waiting for this moment just as much as you had. He had never shown you his emotions throughout this process, to him, it was important he was the strong one. He wasn’t the one who was being injected and examined and their body was failing them constantly. Bob hid his emotions well, locking himself in the bathroom at night while you were sleeping, putting a towel underneath the door jam, and breaking down. Silent sobs would leave his mouth and he prayed that you wouldn’t wake up and hear him. He cried almost every night, feeling like a failure too. He didn’t understand, it was so easy for the people around him to get pregnant without trying, but for some reason, it was mission impossible for you guys.

Bob let you go, setting you back down on the step carefully. He leaned his forehead against yours, cradling your face in his hands, “I love you, so fucking much.” He whispered against your lips.

“I love you too, Bob,” You whispered back, your hands finding their way to his face. You two stood there in silence, in each other’s embrace, soaking in the moment. The moment that you had wanted since day one. Bob always wanted to be a dad, and you always wanted to be a mom.

------------------------

You and Bob had been on cloud nine for a week after finding out you were pregnant. Bob had told the dagger squad. The boys had known about your guys’ fertility issues, they had also been a rock to help you and Bob stand tall after failures. Bob had confided in each of them, Jake more than his own brothers. They had gotten close after the Uranium Mission, Jake considering Bob to be one of his brothers. 

They were beyond ecstatic that you and Bob were pregnant. They all had their own little families, and could see the painful looks on your guys' faces anytime they would come visit. Jake and his wife did their best to give you time with their babies, but you had started to gently decline, your own pain becoming too much to bear, and didn’t want their pity.

Bob held your hand tightly as his knee was bouncing quickly. You guys were at your first doctor's appointment, the first time you will be able to see your baby. Bob’s hands were shaking and your heart was pounding in your chest. Usually, these appointments were disappointing, telling you guys that the transfer process was being halted or had failed because of you. But for once you were optimistic. The hardest part was over, and now you just wanted to see your growing little baby.

“Knock, knock,” The doctor said, poking her head inside the exam room. You smiled up at her as she walked in, “Y/N, Bob, let’s take a look at that baby, shall we?”

“Oh fuck yeah,” Bob breathed out. You smiled at him as he kissed your hand. He stood up from the chair he was sitting in, standing by your head, his eyes trained on the ultrasound machine screen.

“This is going to be cold,” The doctor said, picking up the gel and squirting it on your belly. You were used to the feeling by now, once a month you had an ultrasound to get lining measurements.

The doctor placed the transducer on your belly, and moved it around, getting the view of the inside of your body. You looked up at Bob with a smile, who shot one back down at you, before his coffee colored eyes went back to the screen. Your eyes went to the doctor, who had a puzzled look on her face. She clicked on several keys on the keyboard, while moving the transducer around to get a better look. She moved it around several times, pressing harder as she moved along. She glanced over at you, a grimm look on her face as she took a picture of the inside of your uterus, and put the transducer down.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, Bob, but I’m not seeing anything,” She said softly.

“What?” You asked, your voice light and confused, “B-But I’m pregnant. I took three fucking tests and they were all positive.”

“I’m sorry, it was a false positive. Your blood work sent up a flag, but there’s nothing on the ultrasound. I’m afraid you're not pregnant,” The doctor said. You bit your lip and shook your head, not wanting to believe anything she was saying. Bob’s grip on your hand loosened as he was absorbing the words the doctor had just said.

“T-this doesn’t make fucking sense!” Bob yelled and you flinched at the sound of his voice, “H-How can three fucking tests be wrong!?”

“I don’t know,” The doctor answered honestly, “But I do see some good signs, your lining looks within good measurements, your hormone levels do too. I know this transfer had failed, but things look optimistic for the next one.”

You nodded and looked away from her. She handed you a cloth to wipe up your belly, and you took it, mumbling a thanks. She apologized once again before leaving you and Bob alone in the room. The feeling of dread falling over the both of you. You were back to the beginning. The feeling of heartbreak and misery filling the room. Neither of you two spoke as you walked out of the room and back into the main waiting room, which was filled with expecting mothers. You felt like they were all mocking you with their protruding stomachs and bright smiles on their faces.

You two also didn’t say a word as you drove home. You didn’t even touch each other, being as far away in his car as you could possibly get. Bob pushed past the dogs, not greeting them like he usually would as he walked into the kitchen, grabbing the kettle and filling it up. You greeted the dogs and slowly walked into the kitchen as Bob had his back to you, looking out into the backyard. You sat at the kitchen island and put your head in your hands.

“At Least there was some good out of that,” You sighed. Bob scoffed, still looking out the window, “My lining is still thick and my hormone levels are good. That’s something is positive.”

Bob pushed off from his spot as the kettle started to whistle, opening up the cupboard and slamming it shut, mumbling something under his breath. You squinted at him, feeling the anger rolling off his body.

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you.”

“It’s nothing,” Bob grumbled. He still had his back to you as he poured water into two mugs, placing tea bags in both.

“No, what is it.” You demanded from him.

He sighed and finally turned around to face you, “I can’t keep doing this. The false positives, the tears, the appointments, the ounce of fucking happiness for it to get stripped away in a matter of seconds.”

You stood up from your spot, and walked over to him, placing a hand on his bicep, rubbing your hand up and down it slowly, “I’m sorry. But when it’s our time, it’ll be our time. We still have frozen eggs and you heard the doctor, things are looking really good right now.”

Bob looked you in the eye, his face unreadable, as he shoved past you, “Your optimism makes me sick.”

Your jaw dropped. He had never said anything like this to you before. Usually Bob was the one picking up the pieces after disappointing appointments like todays. You followed Bob into the living room, as he set his mug down on the mantle, and ran his hands through his hair. His body language looked like he was ready for an argument, but his head and heart were telling him to just let it go.

“What the fuck!” You sneered, “Why would you say something like that?”

“Because you don’t realize this shit is fucking with me too!” Bob’s voice cracked as he yelled, turning around to face you. Tears were running down his face, leaving red streaks down his cheeks, “I am here too! I go through this pain too! I lost a child too!”

“I’m not saying you fucking didn’t, Bob! Or you’re not in pain too!”

“You don’t fucking acknowledge it!” Bob yelled, and stepped back, running a hand over his face, “I told my brothers and my best friend. I told my mother. Now I’m supposed to say ‘sike! It was all a lie! Y/N’s still not pregnant, again.'”

“You’re not the one who’s walking around like a constant fucking failure!” You screamed, “You’re not the one who is constantly getting asked when we are having kids! Everyone around me has kids and everyone looks at me like I’m fucking broken!”

“That’s not my fucking fault,” Bob said back, shaking his head and pointing to himself, “I have done everything I can to help you, Y/N!”

“I never said it fucking was, Bob!”

“You’re fucking acting like it!”

You screamed and stormed back into the kitchen. Bob hot on your heels. You two had never fought like this before. You both had a mutual understanding that this was hard on both of you. It took two to make a baby, no matter how that baby was made. Bob had felt just as guilty and sad about the failures along the way as you did. Bob had promised you time and time again that he never blamed you for what couldn’t happen.

“Real fucking mature, Y/N! Throw a fucking tantrum!” Bob yelled, as you gripped the counter, your back to him to hide the tears running down your face now too.

“I’m immature!?” You yelled turning around, “You’re fucking immature Bob!”

“It’s not my fucking fault your body can’t do the one thing it’s supposed to fucking do! I’m not the fucking defective one!”

As soon as the words left his mouth he regretted it. The look in your eyes said everything you were feeling. Bob had felt like he had just punched you in the chest, and that’s what it felt like. You covered your mouth as you let out a sob. Bob said what you had been feeling all along, defective. From the moment the doctor had told you about your fertility issues you had internally labeled yourself as defective. You had even broken down to Bob, calling yourself out loud defective and broken. Bob assured you that you were neither of those things and that your time to be a mother would come one way or another.

You shook your head, digging deep to find your voice, “If I’m so fucking defective, how about you just leave.”

“Fine,” Bob scoffed, “I will.” Bob turned on his heel and walked out of the kitchen to the front door.

“If you walk out that door. . . don’t plan on ever coming back.”

Bob froze his hand on the knob. His mind couldn’t even think clearly, as he pulled the door open and walked out, letting it slam shut. The only sound in the house was the sound of your sobs as you fell to the kitchen floor in tears.

taglist: @els-marvelvsp @sarahsmi13s @topgun-imagines @cassiemitchell @xoxabs88xox @seitmai @a-reader-and-a-writer @bradleybeachbabe @kmc1989 @senawashere @beautifulandvoid @ohtobeleah @rogersbarnesxx @oatmealisweird @dempy @devil-angel-winchester @gillybear17

[eatmangoesnekkid]

A Modern Woman, Indigenous Spirit Practice by India Ame’ye

In the warm sun for a few days, sunbathing the root/foundation of my reality, the ancient art of perineum-sunbathing…. 🍒

Benefits of yoni-perineum sunbathing :

Deeply grounds the body

Warms the reproductive/creative organs —healthy circulation brings more light up the spine and throughout the entire body —higher frequency/multidimensional fertility

Increases health of circulatory and immune systems—makes your skin more radiant and detoxified

Elevates the quality of your arousal and desire —increases libido which isn’t merely about sex, but about health and wellness and quality of creativity

Stimulates creative ideas

Increases overall health of the body with high vitamin d absorption—the root of the body is the most absorptive part of the body

Promotes deep relaxation

Increases intuition/divine energy/aids in opening the pineal gland

It’s time to take women’s health to a whole new level. Because I have high melanin content, I perineum-sunbathe for at least 45 minutes even though the “recommendation” is that you only do it for 5-10 minutes per day. Keep in mind that our world has never cared to study the healing and advancing properties of high levels of melanin, therefore if you are a brown or dark-skinned person, you must begin to be your own biologist, physiologist, and doctor, alongside any other doctors you may have and learn about the jewels of what it means to have been gifted with your body. Here is my personal secret of the universe: I deep breathe the warmth inside the root-tooter of my body slowly and imagine its warmth and light circulating around into my organs. Practices like this one are reasons that you should learn where your vital organs are located so that you can begin to play in your body in one of the highest capacities. Purchasing a simple human health and physiology book will work. One loveliness ❤️❤️❤️ —India Ame’ye

[uncharismatic-fauna]

No Tears for the Southern Black Widow

Latrodectus mactans, more commonly known as the southern black widow, is the most common species in the black widow family. While it can be found throughout North America, they are found most often in the southern United States. Within this wide range, L. mactans enjoys a variety of habitats. They prefer areas that are close to the ground, dark, and sheltered; in the wild this may mean dense brush or under logs, while in inhabited areas they may be found in basements, log piles, or under trash lids.

In addition to being the most common black widow, L. mactans is also the largest member of the family Theridiidae. The females are larger than the males, averaging at about 8-10 mm (0.31- 0.39 in) in length and weighing about 1 g (0.04 oz); however the male's legs are generally longer than the females. Both males and females are black, with small thoraxes and extremely large, round abdomens. The female can be distinguished by the iconic red hour-glass shape on the underside of her abdomen, while the male has 4 pairs of red and white stripes on each side of his abdomen.

The southern black widow is mainly solitary, spending most of its time in or near its web. Only the females live long enough to build a web for catching prey, and are the sole source of black widow bites. While bites do require medical attention, no human fatalities have been reported since 1983.

During the day, females hang in the center of the web to expose the bright red warning on their abdomen; when startled they drop to the ground and play dead. Though the webs they construct are haphazard-- the stereotype of cobwebs-- they are extremely strong and are capable of catching woodlice, millipedes, centipedes, other spiders, and occasionally small mice. Once an animal becomes trapped in L. mactan's web, the spider envenoms its prey and wraps it in a thick cocoon. After the animal dies the spider injects it with digestive enzymes and consumes the resulting fluid. Despite their strong venom, the southern black widow can be victim to several predaotrs; namely wasps, the brown widow spider, praying mantises, and large centipedes.

The southern black widow mates primarily in the spring and summer. Mature males build small webs and deposit semen along the threads. He then coats his mouthpieces-- palps-- with sperm and sets out to find a female mate. To court her, he vibrates the threads of her web until she is receptive. On rare occasions, a displeased female may eat the male. Afterwards, if he survives, the male leaves the females web and dies soon afterwards. From just one encounter, the female can store enough sperm to last her a lifetime of reproductive cycles.

After fertilization, the female builds a small web where she lays her egg sac, which can contain up to 400 eggs. She guards these eggs until they hatch about 20 days later, and immedietly disperse to establish their own territories. Until they become fully mature, at about 90 days old, juveniles have no venom and are extremely vulnerable to predators- including adult black widows. Typically only about 30 individuals from a single clutch survive to adulthood. Once mature, males can live for only one year, while females can live up to three years in the wild.

Conservation status: The IUCN has not evaluated the southern black widow, but due to its large range and population size it is considered stable. It is able to adapt to most habitats, and thus the species' only threat comes from extermination via pest control.

If you send me proof that you’ve made a donation to UNRWA or another organization benefiting Palestinians, I’ll make art of any animal of your choosing.

Photos

Mark Kostich

James L. Castner

Meghan F. Murphy

[yandere-writer-momo]

Heart Shaped Wound:

Katsumi’s Ending (Smut) 🌶️

Minors Do Not Interact

Katsumi’s Ending (Smut)

Art by @amateurbaki

……………………………………..

       The moment Katsumi brought (your name) to the honey moon suite, he threw her on the bed. His calloused hands eagerly tugged apart every tie to get to his prize.

       “Katsumi, stop.” (Your name) pushed her husband back a bit. Her kimono was already mostly off and Katsumi was equally disheveled. His cheeks were flush and his breath was ragged. “Please not yet-“

        Katsumi latched his mouth onto her neck. His lips sucked at the tender flesh with a hum while his hands pulled apart the rest of the silk fabric. His hand now slid into her kimono to touch her bare hip.

       “We’re married now… there is no need to worry. I’ll take care of you…” Katsumi muttered into her skin between fervent kisses. “I’ll take care of us.”

       (Your name) tried to shove him away again but he simply knocked her hands back to continue to remove her clothes. Katsumi pulled back to admire her body in awe.

         “My wife is so beautiful…” Katsumi then intertwined his fingers into her hair to pull her into a passionate kiss. His tongue pushed into her mouth to wrestle with hers. He was eager to explore her wet caverns while he hands cupped the supple flesh of her ass. He could finally touch her… he could finally make love to his wife. “I love you… I love you so much.”

         Katsumi began to shed his own wedding attire. The man took his time, his eyes never left her to ensure that she liked what she saw. Katsumi whistled at her to draw her attention.

         “Do you like my body?” Katsumi shyly asked her. His boxers now the only article of clothing that kept his dignity. (Your name) gulped when she saw the thick bulge in it, the smallest wet stain now visible to her eyes. She was terrified…

        Katsumi took her wide eyes of being an expression of her surprise at his size, which made him puff out his chest in pride. “I’m a little bigger than I let on… but I’m a little bit on the thicker side.”

          Katsumi pulled his boxers down in a flash, his member slapped his stomach in excitement. He leaked with so much precum that the head glistened. There was no way that was going inside of her…

         Katsumi stroked himself, his cheeks flushed under her intense gaze. Katsumi moved himself forward. The man now sat on top of her bare form with a soft smile.

          “We’re going to lose our virginity together…” Katsumi whispered with a smile. He took advantage of her shock and took her hand in his to place it over his heart. The organ drummed in his chest. “We’re going to become one.”

          (Your name) snapped out of her stupor and tried to push away from Katsumi again but he pressed his lips firmly to hers. His hands firmly grasping her hips in place. Katsumi smiled into the kiss, tears fell from his eyes.

         “My mom said you’re fertile right now…” Katsumi whispered, one of his hands dipped down between her legs. His eyes shined in awe at the slight dampness. “We have a whole week together so that should be plenty of time for you to get pregnant…”

         (Your name) was horrified. Him and his whole family were insane… but she knew it was too late for escape. She had no way of contacting anyone nor did she have access to her own money. Katsumi would eventually catch her…

       Katsumi started to experimentally rub his fingers between her legs, her body jolted when he slid over her sensitive bud. Katsumi smiled, his thumb sensually circled the bud to elicit a moan from her. Katsumi was determined to make his wife feel good… he wanted his wife to want him.

          (Your name) put her hand over her mouth to try to quiet her moans. She didn’t want to give Katsumi the satisfaction of knowing she was pleased. But Katsumi took her rebellion as shyness. His wife was so cute… she had nothing to be shy about. This was what two people did when they were in love with each other.

       Katsumi’s fingers soon entered her, his eyes widened at how tight she was… she was so tight… 

         (Your name) hissed in discomfort but Katsumi soon leaned forward to latch his lips onto her neck. He trailed kisses down her soft skin until he reached her chest. Katsumi latched onto her left nipple and began to suck. His eyes rolled back when a loud gasp left (your name)’s lips. Her body arched into his touch. Yes… see? He could make her feel good.

        “Katsumi… stop.” (Your name)’s body trembled. His fingers and his mouth were too much… she felt so strange… like she was going to explode. “I… I’m going to…”

          Katsumi continued to circle her clit with his thumb while his two fingers continued to move inside of her but he moved his mouth to her right nipple. His teeth grazed against the sensitive bud and he was met with a sharp moan. A dampness coated his hands while (your name)’s body spasmed. She just came…

        (Your name) felt herself float down from her high, she rested her head on Katsumi’s shoulder. She felt good… if felt far better than she thought it would…

       Katsumi smiled at her slumped over body, he was happy he was able to pleasure her like a good husband should. Katsumi helped her lay back on the bed, the young man positioned himself at her entrance.

          “I love you.” Katsumi then pushed himself in, his head thrown back in pure ecstasy. She was so wet and so tight… she was a dream. 

        (Your name) was brought back down to reality by the discomfort. She sunk her nails into his biceps from the pain of being stretched in a way she never has been before. 

         Katsumi gasped at the sensation he was feeling. It was so good… it felt like heaven.

         Katsumi continued to push himself in until he bottomed out. Katsumi began to cry when he saw (your name)’s eyes well up with tears. He took them as tears of happiness from finally becoming one.

        “We’re one… I’m yours and you’re mine.” Katsumi bent down to press his lips on hers. “We’re going to have a baby… a family.”

          And that’s when he gave an experimental thrust, a shudder left his lips at how amazing this was. Katsumi never knew sex could feel so good…

         Katsumi pressed his lips against (your name) as he began to thrust into her like a mad man. The woman loudly moaned into his mouth, her nails drew blood from his biceps but it did little to deter Katsumi. Katsumi instead grabbed the back of her legs to go deeper… her body now in a proper mating press. There was one thing and one thing only on his mind. A baby. He wanted a baby.

         Katsumi’s kisses and thrusts grew desperate as his high steadily approached. Poor (your name) gripped onto him for dear life, her cunt dripped a puddle of slick and blood beneath her while Katsumi continued to thrust into her tight dampness. His hips wildly snapped into hers, his tongue intertwined with hers in a sensual manner.

         “I’m going to fill you with my baby… I’m going to fill you with all I have to offer.” Katsumi began to ramble, while his muscles contracted and his hips stuttered. He was going to cum… he was going to fill (your name) to the brim with his seed. “Take it! Take all of me!”

       Katsumi firmly gripped her hips, his hands left bruises in his wake as he gave one last thrust. Something hot and sticky filled her up while he pushed deep into her guts. Katsumi’s eyes rolled back in his head, incoherent mumbles spilled from his lips.

        Katsumi rocked himself two more times before he collapsed beside (your name). His eyes admired the white cream that began to spill from her. His fingers scooped his cum back inside of her so not a single drop would be wasted.

       “I love you so much…” Katsumi pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I can’t wait for our future together. Do you love me too?”

        (Your name)’s eyes were dull. Her body trembled while tears fell from her eyes. This was her fate… he fate was to be the mother of Katsumi’s children…

        “I love you too…” (your name) softly whispered, she succumbed to her fate. She was sure she could learn to love Katsumi with time.

         Katsumi smiled brightly. The young man pulled her up into the bed and moved the covers on top of the two of them.

        Katsumi cuddled close to (your name), his arm wrapped securely around her body while he pressed kisses to the top of her head. He was so happy…

         Together they were going to start a family. Something he had always wanted. And now he would have it with the woman he loved more than life itself... his (your name).

.

.

.

         Katsumi would have her bent over every surface of the suite every chance he had. Their honeymoon was spent making love and eating. They weren’t even able to sight see yet because Katsumi couldn’t keep his hands to himself.

       “Katsumi?” (Your name) asked softly while she laid beside him in the bed. Her body was littered in love marks and bruises, her hair disheveled, and cheeks flushed from yet another passionate round with Katsumi. “How about we go to the beach?”

         She was desperate to get away from him but she didn’t want to outright say it… It’s not like he’d listen anyways. Katsumi was completely delusional now.

       Katsumi smiled at her. The young man wrapped his arms around her while he pressed hot kisses all over her shoulders. He couldn’t get enough of his darling wife…

       “Yes, my love?” She tried not to grimace when she felt him rub himself against her again. She was already so sticky and in desperate need of a shower. 

        “How about we go to the beach and spend the day together?” (Your name) softly whispered, her fingers crossed that he’d agree. Katsumi smiled.

     “Is that what my wife wants to do?” She was tired of him constantly referring to her as his wife. It was annoying, but there was little she could do other than go with it. She nods her head at him.

       “Yes. I’d like to do that… I want to spend quality time with you outside of the suite.” (Your name) became more bold with her desire to get out of this suffocating room. She hated this elegant bird cage he trapped her in and she hated his ardent touches. If she didn’t get out of here, she was going to bash her head into the wall. 

        She masked her inner thoughts with a bright smile. She’d play along with him if it meant she’d have the smallest taste of freedom. Katsumi beamed at her.

         “Then let’s go to the beach! We could take a bath together first.” Katsumi helped her up from the bed. His muscular arms pulled her to him and up in the air bridal style. A goofy grin on his face. “I’ll wash your back for you.”

         (Your name) felt a part of her die again from this interaction. It bitterly reminded her of the relationship she had with him prior to him losing his mind. She adored him still and she hated herself for it… how despite all the things he has done to her, a part of her still cared deeply for him.

        Katsumi sat her in the tub and started the water, the man hummed a chipper tune with a grin. “The water isn’t too hot is it?”

        (Your name) just gave him a soft smile back. She was sure she could forgive him one day, but for now, she’d play along.

       Katsumi crawled in behind her. His hands lovingly ran up and down her bare form. Katsumi pressed a few kisses here and there on her shoulders.

        “When I was young my father died.” Katsumi whispered softly. “I was part of a circus.”

        (Your name) sat patiently in front of him while Katsumi poured his heart out. She had no idea what she did to deserve to be trauma dumped but she allowed him to continue.

       “Doppo and Natsue were there and they took me in. I’m so grateful to have parents as wonderful as them but…” Katsumi moved his hands down to cup her stomach. “I always wondered how it would be to have a family of my own…”

       Katsumi smiled into her shoulder, his head leaned onto her skin to try to be as close as humanly possible. “I promise to be an amazing dad and an amazing husband. I will love you forever, (your name).”

         (Your name) held his hands in hers while the tub continued to fill. The two sat in a comfortable silence, his promise rung in her head over and over. She didn’t doubt that Katsumi would… it was just the way he went about this whole relationship.

         “I know you will, Katsumi.” (Your name) leaned back into his touch. Katsumi curled into her body with his own like a blanket. He had a comforting presence, he was the kind of guy who would take good care of her… but he had broken her trust in him and forced his love onto her.

         (Your name) wasn’t sure how to feel about it all… which she knew would be a recurring thought. Could she learn to love him? She had already accepted her fate of being his wife. But could she genuinely enjoy her time with him?

             Perhaps one day she’d love him back. But that wasn’t going to be anytime soon.

.

.

.

       Two weeks after the honeymoon and (your name) found herself curled over the toilet to vomit out her breakfast. Katsumi held back her hair with shaky hands. His eyes wide and his breath ragged… she was pregnant. They were going to have a baby.

        Katsumi eagerly pulled out the box of pregnancy tests from the cabinet and handed (your name) one. 

         And those two little lines made his chest explode in happiness. Katsumi began to sob while he held her tight to him. Finally… he was finally going to have a family of his own.

._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._.

Author’s Note: thanks for reading!

[ohforficsake]

Talk Refined

main masterlist

Summary: Orpheus and Eurydice. A Blacksmith and a Warrior. A Lawyer and the Lady He Meets at a Bar. Two souls fated to find each other across lifetimes. Here are just a few of those stories.

Pairing: Ezra x f!Reader. Reader is able-bodied and takes many forms. Described as having hair that can be pinned back in one instance, generally open description in others.

This is my submission for @wannab-urs Hozier Drabble Challenge! My character was Ezra, and my prompt was "Talk" off of Wasteland, Baby!. This was such a fun challenge, thank you so much for organizing it, Gin!

Word Count: ~5.8K (I blew past drabble, I'm so sorry)

Rating: Explicit 18+ / brief fingering / brief handjob / unprotected piv / language / main character death / Minors DNI

A/N: This was so incredibly fun to write and I actually had a huge smile on my face when I finished it that I'm pretty sure is still there. I'm incredibly happy with how this turned out. I've never written for Ezra before, so this was a really interesting exercise in finding the voice of a character that I found quite challenging to get to the heart of. Ezra folks, I really hope I did your boy justice.

Notes on literary references and the source of Orpheus' speech (not written by me) included at the end.

I'm also kind of just launching this super hot off the press, so please forgive any typos you may find and definitely message me about them once you're done reading.

Massive thank you to @beskarandblasters for the beautiful cover art for this story! 💚 Go hit Kel up if you're looking for a lovely header for your work!

Dividers by @cafekitsune!

Part I: The Darkness of the Night

He’s called Orpheus in this lifetime. Blessed with his mother’s tongue. 

No way of knowing he forever will be.  

A twist of phrase. A glint in the eye. 

A white patch at his hairline is the only mark of his father. As if licked there by the rays of Apollo’s creation.

And he is his mother’s boy, plucking at lyre strings and humming low, branches bending to his ambit as he harmonizes with the rush of Zephyrus’ wings through tall grasses.

But you are a rich distraction indeed.

A distraction perhaps of the West Wind’s own making, for the god has always been a soft touch. 

The breeze toys with your chiton as you drift in and out of dreams. 

Molding gossamer to your form.

A promise of something just for him.

Orpheus reaches to run his knuckles down your arm, awaiting your stirring before he takes fingers over your shoulder, up to cup your cheek.

You turn to press against the warmth of his hand. The pad of his thumb softly skimming your bottom lip.

It sends sparks racing across your skin.

He hums a laugh and fits closer to you, warmer now than the midday sun. You slant your eyes up at him, greeted with a smile before he bends to press a long kiss to your mouth.

His lyre is discarded in the grass now, wildflowers poking up through its strings.

The hand on your cheek moves to pull at his red linen handkerchief around your neck. Tied there in the morn to guard the late-hour transgressions of his lips from judgmental stares. 

Again revealed to him now.

He tucks the cloth into his zoster before his fingers dip under the gauze of your robes, cupping one breast before his lips replace fabric.

“The dryads, my darling,” you whisper a warning into the heated hollow of his mouth.

“Fret not, my love,” he chides with a whisper.

And you whimper a wanton, insincere protest as his hand adjusts to move lower still, nimble fingers inching your hemline up until your thighs are bared to him.

“Surely such creatures would sympathize. Look favorably on newlywed dalliance.”

“For they understand pleasures such as these,” he murmurs as his fingers slip over your core.

"The nymphs haven’t our flesh," you gasp against his curls as he bends to nip at the lush of your breast.

"They have our desires."

"The nymphs know fertile things in ways we never shall, my darling Eurydice," ghosts hot against your skin. 

"And surely they know what comes of something flush with want."

The press of his length against you causes your hips to tilt into his hand as your languid knees fall open.

"To deny that nature is to deny the nymphs themselves, little dove."

He tips his face to brush petal-soft lips against your frantic pulse as he shifts over you.

"For you see, they don’t care."

And the breach of him causes your back to arch, nails digging into the corded muscle of his arms.

You bend enough for your eyes to land on the grove of oak trees.

Unsure if begging forgiveness. 

Or reveling in their jealousy.

But there are other eyes on you this day. Watching the deft way your husband wrings pleasure from your form. 

The way he rolls you over on a bed of meadowsweet to press deeper still.

Holding your body to his as he pulls music from your throat.

Other eyes, indiscreet in their desire and relentless in their pursuit.

Other eyes that lead to your journey across the Styx.

Lead to Orpheus’ torment.

They say there are ways to speak with the dead.

But words will not pacify the poet when the possibility exists to feel you beneath him again.

A body that writhes under his own. Skin soft against the way his burns.

The way you welcome the thick weight of him.

All of him.

Into the warm clutch of your wet cunt.

And Orpheus, driven by his desire and blessed with his mother’s gift, marches boldly into the depths of grief.

“You powers divine of the subterranean kingdom, where all of mortal creation must one day sink to our doom, if you will give me permission to tell you the truth unvarnished by shifty pretenses…”

“I’d hoped to be able to bear my loss and confess that I tried.”

And the dance of his fingers over gut string pricks the ears of the damned as he gives verse to his flesh’s torment.

“In the name of these confines of fear, in the name of this vast abyss and your realm of infinite silence, I, Orpheus, implore you, unravel the web of my dear Eurydice’s early passing.”

A prayer for relief.

“This is the place that we all are bound for, our final dwelling, and yours is the longest reign that the human race must endure.”

Through vulpine teeth.

“Eurydice too, when her due of years has been ripely completed, shall own your sway. Till then, I beg you to let me enjoy her.”

And it moves the hound to cease its lashing. 

Moves the one eternally punished to rest upon his stone. 

Moves the dead of Winter to cave to the tender brush of Spring’s hand.

And you are called forth by a voice between what should be your ears. 

And Orpheus begins to move.

Daring to hope for your sweet clutch again as your footsteps grow louder against stone.

As you take the form he knows, more corporeal with every footfall.

The tenderness in your ankle made manifest with flesh.

And his cock throbs with the thought of you.

His wife.

His muse.

But there’s a pause in the lilting cadence of your step.

Where you’ve stopped to grab for the fallen handkerchief that slipped from his belt.

And the panic flooding his breast moves him against all hope.

And he turns.

And you reach for him.

Before disappearing for the final time.

With forgiveness swimming in your eyes.

Part II: Pilgrim, Stranger, Wanderer

He’s called Doran in this lifetime.

A name you learn upon ducking into the blacksmith’s workshop with another man’s name on your lips. 

“Callum!” You call, greeted instead by a shock of white hair where blonde should be.

Round brown eyes where you expected green.

“Apologies,” you offer, “I am looking for the smith.”

“Callum was called away to his family in the north country.”

His answering voice like honey just starting to crystalize. 

“I’m called Doran,” he bends his head in customary greeting.

And you note the broad spread of his hand against his chest.

“I apprenticed under Callum, in what feels like a lifetime ago now, I admit.” He offers a small smirk. “He asked that I mind the forge in his absence.”

And you give him your name but not your full belief in this story.

“May I help you with something, dove?”  

You straighten against the rake of his eyes. “My horse requires particular shoes. She is of a larger breed and nothing standard will suit.”

And you turn your back to him leading the way outside.

Doran whistles low at the sight of your mare, a sturdy Friesian glossed blue in the morning sun.

“She is a stunning creature,” he purrs, gently taking his fingers over her strong neck.

Pausing to thumb the iris stamped into the leather of her bridle.

“She’s no delicate thing,” you watch as he circles the horse. “Her grandsire was a draft who pulled the High King’s carriage.”

He fits one massive hoof between his knees, gently brushing away the feathers at her ankle before she starts fighting his touch. 

He adjusts her gently, inspecting her irons before she protests in earnest.

“It’s apparent,” he says, quickly dropping the horse’s foot and jumping aside before she stamps and shakes her head, “that her blood runs hot.”

“She does not favor the touch of men,” you answer, soothing a hand over her hindquarters. “I should have forewarned you.”

“A fair lady is entitled to her opinions when she is that beautiful,” Doran gives her a wide berth.

And takes his eyes over you instead. 

“You are the nobleman’s daughter.” He squints against the sun. “The warrior?” 

“I am.”

“Now,” he pulls a rag from his pocket and rubs at his hands, “I know well the dangers of feminine beauty but a warrioress is altogether new to me. You are not riding into battle soon, I pray?”

“One in my position exists in a constant state of preparation. But there is no rumble of battle on the horizon.” 

His smirk dimples one cheek now.

“I shall have the shoes for your láir within the week. And I shall pray you need not fly away before then, little dove.”

“May I make half the payment now for your services? This was the custom with the old smith.”

“The only payment for my services I can insist upon is merely the chance to sit in your presence a moment longer. Would a fair lady allow a humble blacksmith that much?”

And you see straight through him. Through to the tools on the wall. 

But the broad set of his shoulders under ash-smudged linen. The way he moves, lithe and light on his feet as he dances between his stock of iron bars and his cache of hammers. The bright wideness of his eyes that betray sincerity or something of its kin.

A humble one no. But this one, perhaps.

You drop a pouch of coins onto his anvil. “Where?”

“Meet me here. In the morrow?”

And you tell him “maybe” in the moment as you climb into your saddle.

But you arrive on foot the next morning. 

_____

You meet him three mornings in the week it takes him to forge your mare’s irons. 

On the first day he tells you of his travels through Spain and France. Of scrambling up the masts of the ship that brought him to your shore. 

On the third, he recites The Bard’s work with such nuance that you’re not entirely sure he isn’t the man himself.  

On the fifth day he leads you out to the ruins of an old monastery, up a winding staircase until you’re forced to stand so close on the crumbling parapet that you can feel the heat of him at your back.

Your head spins from something other than the height.

On the seventh day he places four horseshoes, lovingly wrapped in burlap and bound with hemp cord, into the hand he has cradled in his own. 

Warm and worn.

“Can I see you again?” He murmurs, barely a foot between you.

“Is that wise?”

“I have been mistaken for many things, little dove.” He brushes two knuckles over your cheekbone. “Nary a man has included wise among them.”

And you scoff but press into his touch all the same. 

“Forgive me my boldness,” he takes his fingers under your chin, “but I must pose the question.”

“Your mare does not favor the touch of men.”

“But,” he purrs, “do you?”

And your lips form the word “goodnight” but you don’t dare move.

Your eyes flash with a want that does not go neglected. 

“Must you take your leave?” He thumbs your bottom lip.

“I must.”

“But what of my payment,” he hums.

“As I recall you beseeched me pay with my time,” you tilt your head, reveling in the brush of warm breath against your skin, “I dare say I’ve tendered more than my share.”

“And yet I am in debt every time you take your presence from me,” he smirks. “There is something of you, little dove, that I fear has a hold on—”

You steal the words from his lips with your own.

And the unabashed delight dancing over his features when you part makes you kiss him again.

You fling your arm to rest the irons on the first surface you can find, desperate to wind your hands in his hair as his fit to your waist.

He urges your mouth open with the soft slip of his tongue. Humming when you let him inside.

“Little bird,” he pants when he tears his lips from you, forehead thumping hard against yours. “I confess if you stay past this moment I shall not be able to exercise any measure of restraint.”

“Is restraint what you desire?” You angle heavy-lidded eyes up at him. 

“Not in the slightest,” he swallows hard, fist still gripping at your hair. “But you are a gentle lady with a good name, and I—”

“I want you, Doran,” you murmur. “This.”

And his head falls back on his shoulders with a tight, pained hiss.

“I confess I have given in to the fantasy of hearing that fall from this lush mouth many nights since first we met.”

And he expects heat to rise to your cheeks at his admission. But the hand that cradles your neck finds no such warmth.

“Do you know how it works?” He hums low, running his palm down your sleeve to lace thick fingers with yours. “Pleasure?” He brings your knuckles to his lips, eyes glinting in hearthlight. 

And there is sincerity evident in his gaze.

For you are a gentle lady with a good name. 

“Mmm, have you felt this?” He takes your hand, gliding it over the rough wool of his trousers.

To the hard line of his length underneath them. 

Your breath skips.

You are no stranger to amusement of the flesh. But never before have you felt so—much. 

“Feel me, birdie,” he hums, rolling his forehead against yours, “what you do to me. I fear there isn’t any blood left for the rest of me.” He kisses you again. “Only for you. This. Just for you.”

“Your bed, Doran,” you murmur against his mouth.

The hand over yours encircles your wrist and he leads you through to his chambers.

He pulls you tight to his body again, mouths locked as his hands roam your form, unable to settle upon what features his fingers must traverse first. 

You push the braces from his shoulders and he helps you with the buttons of his shirt, your hands skating up the smooth expanse of tanned skin before tugging at your own shirttails.

Your lips find his neck as he unbuttons his trousers. You’ve already stepped out of yours.

“So eager, birdie,” he wraps you in his arms, and your skin burns with his touch. “Surely you’ve seen it with beasts, yes?” He salts your neck with kisses. “It’s quick with them, you see. It doesn’t have to be. Doesn’t have to—”

A moan cuts off his babbling from where you’ve taken him in hand. 

“Although I may yet need to beg your forgiveness,” his hips buck into your hand, “my stamina may yet waiver, upon this first time.”

His tongue slips into your mouth again and finally he finds himself enough to back you up until your thighs meet his bed. 

“It’s been so long. So long, birdie, since I have held a woman.” He leans you back with his body as your hands fly to his hair. “Longer still since I have held one as soft. Supple and pliant as you.” His lips map your collarbone, nose skimming the valley of your breasts as he takes one in hand.

“Never before is a long time indeed.”

He sucks at tender, pebbled skin, drawing an arch in your spine as he shifts to settle between your legs.

“I give you my word that I will indeed take my time with you but I offer a preemptive apology in the instance that I fail upon this first time.” His fingers slip down to toy with your folds, groaning against your ribs at the wetness that he finds there. “Perhaps we are no different than animals indeed.” 

You hear only half of his babbling. 

The static of anticipation under your skin crackles in your ears as your hips tip into his hand. His thumb slides over your clit and you cry out. 

“You see, sometimes a man just needs to bury himself deep.”

He slings your legs over his hips and sits up on his knees, stroking his length with your borrowed wetness as your hands find his thighs.

There’s a dark edge to his voice now. Heavy-lidded eyes locked on the core of you.

“This need. It’s far stronger than I ever will be.”

“Now, Doran, I need—”

He doesn’t make you wait.

And he keeps his word in the moments it matters. Slowly rocking his hips to stretch you open on his cock before your body begs him deeper.

Large palms settle around your waist as he builds in pace, alternating slow with fast. Tenderness with force that drives the bedframe to knock against the wall. When his thumb winds circles against your clit you cry into the night as pleasure rips through you. Greedy lips crash against yours as his weight blankets your reeling form. Fevered moans in his chest thrum through you as he savors the way your walls pulse around him. 

He buries his face against your neck and you feel the bite of his teeth as he snarls, drawing closer and closer to the edge.

He cants his hips just so at the last minute, pulling himself from your heat a moment before his seed streams hot over your thigh.

You soothe a hand over the nape of his neck as his hips spasm with the last of it, wide hand cradling your jaw and tipping your face to his.

Kisses softer now. 

Grateful.

“You are a rare bird indeed,” he murmurs against your ear, lips ghosting over your neck. 

He finds himself enough to rise from bed and kneel on the floor, searching for his handkerchief amongst the tangle of his clothes. 

Yours peeks from the pocket of your trousers, red against brown wool, and you lazily twirl a corner of it around your finger and draw it out.

Doran catches it from your hand, gently cleaning your thigh of his spend before pressing a kiss there. 

“I shall return this to you clean,” he holds it up briefly before craning to press a kiss to your lips. “Don’t trouble a hair on your head with moving, birdie,” he bids you before disappearing to the kitchen.

You trouble the hair on your head all the same as you pull the jostled pins from it, tousling it out of the style your nurse had so meticulously placed it in this morning. 

Doran returns with two glasses and a bottle of whiskey. He fills them as you prop yourself up on your side and he settles on the floor. One arm slung up on the mattress.

Adoration in his eyes as he tips his glass against yours.

“You didn’t tell me this was not your first time. Although I do find it rather a pleasant surprise,” he rubs a hand over the curve of your waist with lust-hazed eyes.

“I could scarcely utter a word amidst your chatter,” you tease with a grin as you take another sip of your whiskey.

His smile dimples his cheek. 

“Are you—”

For once he hesitates to speak.

“Are you promised to anyone?”

You catch his hand and bring it to your lips, pressing a kiss to his palm before he thumbs your cheekbone.

“None but myself. And my duty.”

He hums in acknowledgment. 

You finger the white patch at his hairline, twirling a clinging curl. 

“Angered a horse as a child and she made it known with her hooves,” he offers. “Frightened the color from that spot, I’m afraid.”

“There’s character in it. I’m quite fond.”

He turns in and rests his chin on the bed, hand back to trailing over your curves. 

“Dove?”

And you frown at the nickname.

“I am nothing so delicate, Doran.”

“A shrike then, perhaps,” he smirks, knuckles ghosting over your stomach. 

And something about it makes your heart preen.

“Has a man ever,” his fingers dip lower over your abdomen, “put his mouth on you?” 

It sends a fresh jolt of pleasure racing up your spine. You turn onto your back without thought, basking in his touch as fingers trail over your mound.

“Right here?” The pads of his middle and ring fingers wind softly against your clit.

“No,” you gasp.

“Then may I have the pleasure of being the first?”

And he is the first in a way that has you wishing for him to be the last. 

The only.

_____

Your handmaid was sympathetic to your cause, having been driven from her own house for true love. They share a small cottage on your father’s land now.

Your mother, though she did not know the intricacies of your continued dalliances with the blacksmith, knew the shift in your demeanor was a man’s doing. And she always was a soft touch for love.

Your father.

Was your mother’s concern. 

And so your nurse covers your footsteps with a tickle in her throat that needs clearing.

Ushers you back into your chambers before morning light with a knowing smile.

“I always thought you would make a pass for the stable hand,” she confesses one day as she pours heated water over your hair. “The blacksmith is a surprise.”

“An unpleasant one?”

“Not in the slightest. He’s handsome.”

You can tell there is more to the sentiment. 

“Yes, and?” You ask with a raised brow.

“Rakish.”

“Perhaps rakish is what I need,” as you rub water from your eyes. 

“No lady with sense needs rakish, my darling girl,” she chides as she rubs soap at your scalp. “But a lady with sense should indulge in it from time to time.” 

This draws a smile across your lips.

“He treats you well?”

“He treats me to pleasure the likes of which I have never known. If I offer this kingdom the breath in my breast every time I leave its gates, the least I may be permitted is the choice of a lover.” 

And so she fixes you bitter tea every morning that you return from your rakish man.

_____

The pair of you take to late night meetings at the old groundskeeper’s shack on your parents’ land. 

Where the splashing of the brook over rocks and the churn of the water wheel stifle the way he makes you cry out in pleasure.

And for one so verbose, he does excel at discretion. Raking ashes from the forge through the patch of white in his hair. Bending shadows around himself as he slips from town and into the forest at the edge of the estate. 

The pair of you carry on for months. Until summer sun yields to the darkening blanket of fall. 

A welcome change that lengthens your stolen hours.

“I’d wager that we were lovers in lives past,” he muses one night, lips pressing kisses against a scar on your shoulder. “You know me, little bird. The very depths of me.”

“Perhaps,” you roll over in a luxuriant stretch, “you are easy to know.”

“The Townsfolk would perhaps beg to differ, my darling.” He rests his hand on your cheek as you curl into him.

“Must you go in the morrow?” He asks softly.

“I’m afraid I must. For it is my duty. To ensure the safety—”

“—of the kingdom,” you both finish.

“In that case, I have made you a gift.” He reaches over your form down to the pocket of his cloak, and produces a small canvas pouch.

He sits up with you, pulling your back to his chest, arms around your middle as he watches you. 

A small silver disk threaded on a chain falls into your palm. An iris stamped into the pendant.

“Doran, it’s beautiful. You made this?”

“It is perhaps more crude than a silversmith’s work,” he helps you fasten it around your neck, “but I wanted you to have something to remember my touch in the absence of it.”

You turn towards him such that he can see you in the firelight. Ash on your jaw from where you held him to your neck, perched atop his hips while he ground deep. 

Silver pendant hanging just above the valley of your breasts. 

“Beautiful,” he smiles, pressing a kiss against your lips, thumbing at the smudge on your chin. “I have always thought there to be something undeniably sensual in the furl of iris petals,” he rumbles, “how fitting for them to be your favorite.”

“Your imagination is swift, Doran.”

“You have not beheld what I have, dearheart,” he pulls you down against the bed linens once more.

Holding you against his heart. 

And he is quiet for a long while, fingers running softly over your stomach, nose buried in your hair.

“What of my safety?” He asks. 

A plea to keep you here. 

“What shall I do?”

“I have no doubt you will find another iris that unfurls for you in the meanwhile,” you hum. Eyes slipping closed. 

“There is only one, my love. I shall wait for your return.”

_____

A grand crowd lines the streets as you and the men of your battalion ride towards the village gates the next morning. Full of cheers and blessings.

And you offer the customary wave and nod.

But your heart hammers against chainmail. 

Eyes darting through the crowd.

Willing a shock of white to appear. 

And as you near the gates he greets you.

Warm brown eyes and a grin of pride. He rushes to push through the crowd as you approach on your mare, eyes never leaving each other. 

You slip one foot from your stirrup and he jams one of his into it and stands, briefly.

Long enough to cup the base of your skull and lay a parting kiss against your lips.

You hurriedly pull your red handkerchief from behind your breastplate, pressing it into his palm as he drops away.

Crushing the cloth to his heart as you slip through the gates. 

And it will yield the ire of your father and the warm, joyous tears of your mother.

But they matter not.

For you do not return home under your own power. 

You return home under a shroud. 

Your nurse slips into the night, treading your path with your necklace in hand.

“She was found with her hand over her heart. And this underneath it.”

And the blacksmith. 

Wrought with grief.

Is never seen again.

Part III: The Helper. The Protector.

He’s called Ezra in this lifetime. 

Brought to this bar by a group of associates keen on celebrating his win in federal court this afternoon. 

And he knows it’s an excuse to drink on the firm’s dime.

He was an associate once too. 

But they helped draft the brief that saved their client $44 million. A few drinks is a small thanks. 

Ezra sticks to the corners, entertaining chatter only when approached. Kindly redirecting the advances of a first year who’s too young to realize flirting with a partner is career suicide.

He’s content tonight to sip his bourbon and observe.

“Okay, but I told you that Bismark case was horseshit and the judge was going to see that!” One associate who is two drinks too deep roars.

“That was so fucking risky, I still can’t believe you put so much weight on that,” another chides.

“Fucking WORKED though!” And the first man spreads his arms wide.

Knocking you into the sip of red wine you were about to take from your seat at the bar. 

“Jesus, fuckin’—” you start before taking a deep breath and glancing down at the patch of deep burgundy beginning to spread on your white blouse. 

Fuck.

“Boys, boys, this lovely lady didn’t consent to hearing your opinions on bullshit 4th Circuit rulings, okay?” Ezra appears, stretching an arm between you and the men. “Let’s be a little more careful, take it to a booth, yeah?”

“Miss, I apologize on their behalf,” he starts and you take another centering breath because you really are not here for some hotshot lawyer’s apologies. This is your spot, and they’re fucking with your Thursday night nightcap.

But the brown eyes you’re met with are wide and sincere.

And something at the very core of you thrums momentarily with something you can’t name. 

“Please, allow me to replace your wine and cover your tab for the night.” He’s already calling the barman over before you can assure him that’s really not necessary because they’ve fucked up your night already and you just want to go home. 

“Could you please arrange a fresh glass of wine for this lovely lady, place her tab on the card I gave you, and may I have a shot glass of white wine. I need the white wine as quickly as you can, please. Thanks very much.”

And you’re still staring at those brown eyes.

Bristling and dumbstruck at the same time. 

“Ezra,” he holds out a hand in belated introduction, and you offer a firm shake and your name in exchange.

“Sorry, a shot glass of white wine?” You quip as the bartender places it in front of Ezra.

He slips a red pocket square from his jacket and dips a corner into the shot glass.

“Apologies, may I?”

And inexplicably you turn in towards him on your bar stool as he dabs at the stain on your shirt. 

Just over your heart. 

“White wine will keep the stain from setting,” he proffers.

You crane your neck to the side, trying to settle your focus on cut glass bottles and not the stranger tending to the fine layer of cotton just above your left breast. 

He’s gentle though. Respectful in a way you perhaps didn’t anticipate. 

He smells of hinoki wood and worn leather.

“Right as rain,” he announces and takes half a step back before offering you the handkerchief. “If you want to hold that there to blot some of the excess.”

“Um, yeah, thank you. Thanks,” you hold the cloth over your heart as the bartender returns with your fresh glass of wine. 

Ezra settles on the barstool next to you.

“How…did you know that?” 

“About the wine?” He swallows a sip of bourbon. “Must’ve read it at some point and it just stuck.”

“Seems you’re a good man to have around in a crisis then,” you smile and tip your glass in his direction. He gently touches the side of his against it, before tapping the heavy base against the bar and taking another sip. 

Everything he does is briefly fascinating. 

“I apologize again for these kids,” he reaches into the inside pocket of his jacket, producing a business card which he slides over to you face-down. “You should be all good with that,” he gestures at the handkerchief, “but I insist on you sending me the dry cleaning bill. If I’ve recalled incorrectly and it does stain, I will procure a replacement for you, you have my word.”

“That’s really not necessary,” you start and yet find yourself unable to stop, “and I’m not even sure it’s possible this is vintage—”

“Alexander McQueen, I know.”

You turn all the way towards him on your barstool now. 

And his eyes glitter with your fascination as he runs his hand through the patch of white at his hairline.

“What are you reading,” he tips his head to the side as if to glimpse the cover of your book but he doesn’t break your gaze. Cheek dimpled with a half smile. 

“Ovid. Metamorphoses.”

“For fun?” There’s a hint of surprise in his voice but it’s far from belittling. 

“It’s…” you start before a smile splits your face, “yeah. For fun.”

And he echoes your grin.

“I re-read it for fun last year. I think the passage about Orpheus’ death is my favorite.”

“Fascinating,” you swallow a sip of your tempranillo. “Why that one?” 

“Well, I believe it’s a commentary on both the unbridled rage of passion and a testament to the obstinate nature of true love.”

“Obstinate?” You incline your head incredulously. “That’s quite a choice.”

“And yet it holds true, does it not? Orpheus, arguably one of the most talented figures in Greek mythology,” and he’s gesturing broadly now, “able to enchant the very souls of feral beasts and move trees to bend their limbs just to be nearer his music.”

He jabs his finger into the bartop between you, “he moved Hades, both the realm and the deity himself, let’s not forget, correct?”

And you nod, amusement playing across your features. 

“The earth and the underworld fell at his feet. And he shunned it all out of love for Eurydice.”

“And so what moral value do you place on obstinacy?” You ask.

“Obstinacy in love is the only way to experience it. To feel it so completely that you forsake everything else. Defy the world. For love. Fidelity to the wife that you betrayed by turning back.” Brown eyes are wide with his conviction.

He adds, “even Shakespeare said let it be virtuous to be obstinate.”

“Okay, in a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT context!” Your turn to erupt now, with arms thrown in the air where you’re met by his wide smile. “You cannot cherry pick that out of Coriolanus choosing to abandon his family out of sheer stubbornness, and frankly, contempt for his own people, to extol the virtues of love! Let it be virtuous to FORSAKE that love, is the whole point of that line.”

And this is the moment.

That Ezra falls in love.

And you’re not far behind.

Time slips from this point on. Patrons file in and out. More wine and whiskey is poured. Associates drunkenly clap him on the back as they make their way home, but none of it registers.

The world spins around the pair of you.

Until finally the bartender insists that he close his tab. 

And you both step out onto a city street wet with the aftermath of a brief summer downpour. 

“Thank you,” Ezra starts, “for the absolute pleasure of your company.”

He holds a tentative hand out, which you shake with a heartfelt “likewise.”

“Oh, your handkerchief,” you pull it from your pocket and hold it out to him. 

“Keep it.” He smiles. 

And you both spin on your heels. Proceeding in opposite directions.

But the warp and weft of the red cotton square that you keep rubbing between your fingers forces you to stop in your tracks. 

You turn around.

And look back. 

Meeting Ezra’s gaze from where he hasn’t moved a step.

He thumbs the corner of his lips, brown eyes locked on yours.

And you both move. 

Urgent steps pulled by Fates’ string.

Colliding as you throw your arms around his neck and he locks you against him with biceps around your ribs.

Lips crashing together with the relief of a thousand lifetimes. 

Lifetimes that you’ve known each other.

Lifetimes that you’ve lost each other. 

And this lifetime. Having found each other again.

Taglist of folks who may be interested, as always, please do let me know if you'd prefer not to be tagged, or if you'd like to be added!

@morallyinept @iamskyereads @tinytinymenace @for-a-longlongtime @legendary-pink-dot

@oliveksmoked @nerdieforpedro @julesonrecord

Subpart headings are the meaning of Ezra's name in that section.

Orpheus' monologue included herein in italics is quoted from David Raeburn's 2004 translation of Ovid's Metamorphoses, published by Penguin Classics. The text of this translation just felt so Ezra that I had to include it in that form. If you'd like to hear it read by Hozier himself, head on over to his instagram circa summer 2020's Poetry Fridays for this and some other wonderful work.

This story references the version of Eurydice's death as precipitated by Aristaeus.

Láir means mare in Irish Gaelic.

"Let it be virtuous to be obstinate" is quoted from Coriolanus by William Shakespeare.

[rabbithaver]

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[angelflms]

Hi,

This is me, Noura Ayman,

A medical lab specialist and I have been working in the Turkish Friendship Hospital for four years and studying a master's degree at Al-Aqsa University but have not yet finished it.

I am married to Ibrahim who works the same profession at Al-Shifa Hospital and we were studying a master's degree together.

My story in short is that we have been out of Gaza for treatment in Egypt since July 2023, and we have done an “in vitro fertilization” to give birth after four failed operations in Gaza.

We had a very beautiful baby.

But sadly that the war happened in Gaza in October 2023 and we have been stuck in Egypt ever since without any source of income, and I don't know how to provide for my beautiful daughter's Hanan needs and how to pay for the house and the rest of life, plus our house was bombed in Gaza.

So please support me to set up my own medical analysis laboratory and complete a master's degree in Egypt.

I thank you very much for your interest and support.