#many times i got distracted what was going on in the tasks cos i was too busy thinking 'women... hot' ngl lol

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

taskmaster champion of champions 3 or as i like to call it 'cries in gay at how hot all the women are'

[prettieinpink]

HOW TO START IMPLEMENTING CHANGE + STAY MOTIVATED

HAVE A REASON. It is going to be hard to start inputting change in your life if you do not even have a reason why. That reason also has to come from within, not from any other externalities (friends, school, work, family). This reason has to make you strive to be better.

If you’re unsure about your reason, write down times when you feel your happiest and when you feel your lowest, then notice any common themes. 

BUILD DISCIPLINE. Discipline is the ability to be productive without hesitation or distractions. The only way to build it, is to practice it. Do the things you need/want to do, regardless of how you feel in the present.

Just remember, that you always feel better after committing to yourself.

MAKE YOUR PLAN SUSTAINABLE. Your routines and habits you want to implement, need to be at arm’s length for you. While I do believe in challenging yourself if your mind perceives that specific activity as ‘too hard’, it is going to make you avoid that task.

This is a reaction from your ego coming out of your comfort zone because it is so unfamiliar it wants to protect if anything ‘bad’ happens e.g. failure, loss of control and criticism. 

Reminder, that part of you is not bad at all nor is it holding you back. It is the part of you that wants to keep you safe. For your ego to allow you to do tasks out of your comfort zone, it needs to be simple and easy. Then from there, you can build it up to your ideal habit or routine. 

MAKE YOUR ENVIRONMENT INTENTIONAL. Your mind, space and the people around you need to be decluttered and serve a purpose. For your mind, avoid feeding it with an overload of information especially if you are not going to apply it. Minimise social media use and journaling instead of looking for a quick fix. 

Your space, specifically your bedroom has to be the best place for you to grow. Everything in your room needs to serve a purpose, it has to be kept clean to ensure mind clarity and place intentional items around to support your goals (mantras, workout mat, water bottle, instruments). 

The people around you have to support you and your journey. I don’t believe in the ‘value’ or ‘worth’ people have, but rather what you think of them. Someone could be the most overachieving and productive person ever, so they may inspire you, but what if they don’t wish the best for you? People who will support you regardless are the best resource ever.

BE FLEXIBLE. The ability to edit your habits or routine when needed so you can stick to a schedule or adapt to change is a powerful but underrated skill. Anything in life can happen, but if we want to stick to our goals, we need to develop flexibility. 

The best way to develop flexibility is to try everything. For example, meditation. Do 5, 10, 15, and 20 minutes, try it in the morning, afternoon or evening, do a guided one or do it by yourself. To get flexible in a habit, you need to expand your capabilities in that habit. 

ALWAYS SOMETHING RATHER THAN NOTHING. Typically during the day, we procrastinate because we want the challenging task to be perfect or we believe there’s not enough time/resources to do it. 

However, just having that small progress each day is always better than nothing. One sentence is better than none, one healthy meal is better than none, 2 minutes of exercise is better than none etc. 

HAVE GOALS THAT YOU LIKE. The reason so many people dislike doing their habits or routines is because it’s not stuff that’s enjoyable for them. It’s habits and routines that they got online from someone completely different. 

Choose your favourite way of exercising, read your favourite books(even graphic ones!) and journal the way you want. If the steps to becoming your best self are steps that you dislike, then it is not your best self. 

IDENTIFY THE WAY YOU SELF-SABOTAGE. If you are struggling to implement change, chances are there are small self-destructive behaviours that are in your routines that hold you back. 

This could be major procrastination, doom-scrolling, an addiction or binge eating. You either have to completely extract these habits from your life or you can do these things in moderation. 

TAKE REGULAR BREAKS. If you are being productive back-to-back and not allowing yourself to cool down, your motivation will deplete quickly. Have around 1-2 hours in your day doing anything you like.

If needed, after each task, take 5-10 minutes for yourself. However, do avoid your phone for these periods and try to be present in whatever you do here. 

HAVE SOFT DAYS. Days in which you do not have to do anything hardcore or intense, and you’re just living. While yes, be somewhat productive but nothing too intense.

This can be your reset, detox or self care days, or all of them combined!

[mimsynims]

Fool For Love

part 8

~~~

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7

~~~

Author's Note: Sorry this took longer than usual, it was a stressful week at work and I didn't have time or energy to write as much as I wanted. There will be at least one more part, but I'm hoping I'll wrap things up next time (but honestly who knows with these two)

More act 2 spoilers this time!

~~~

Astarion x reader/Tav

Tags: (mildish?) angst, pining, pining while fucking, jealousy, minor Karlach/Dammon, non-explicit injuries, eventual happy ending

Summary: You thought you knew what you were doing when you let Astarion into your bed. He doesn’t have feelings for you, and vice versa. Only…now you do.

Up until now, you’ve not been handling it very well, but you make an effort to move past it. Past him.

~~~

You keep your promise to yourself fairly well in the following days. The Shadowlands, as expected, keep you busy with new mysteries and clues — and plenty of battles — and most of the time, you manage to remain focused on the task at hand.

Perhaps your heartbeat picks up a notch every time Astarion is near, but you ignore it. And maybe, just maybe, you stare at him a smidge too long when he’s not looking, but only when you know it doesn’t pull your attention away from something important.

You’ve caught him watching you too, but you keep your distance. No distractions, not even for a quick roll in the proverbial hay.

Everything is going relatively alright — until it doesn’t.

Thanks to the psionic detector, the Githyanki ambush doesn’t catch you off-guard, but you learn quickly that you have underestimated the danger they pose.

Perhaps you all got too cocky these last few days — too many easily-won battles that have boosted your confidence into thinking that this too will be readily handled.

In retrospect, you should’ve returned to stock up on scrolls and potions before taking them on. Too late now.

It’s a drawn-out battle, wearing you all out little by little, but if it’s anything you and your friends are, it’s tenacious — and after what feels like an eternity, you’re down to one foe. It’s their leader, but even with all of you severely injured, you should be able to take them out.

You grin as Karlach deals a critical hit with her halberd, finishing the Githyanki off with a savage roar.

“Gods, that was close.”

“Too close,” Astarion says as he sheaths his swords. Things aren’t exactly good between you, but it has been getting better. “Next time we contemplate doing something this stupid, how about we don’t?”

“You’re just cranky ‘cause you didn’t get to bite either of them.” Karlach nudges him with a grin. “Isn’t that right, Fangs?”

You’re still laughing when something behind the others steals your attention.

One of the other Githyanki. You saw them get felled by one of Shadowheart’s spells, but perhaps they only got knocked out.

You stop breathing when you realise that not only are they alive — but they have an arrow notched, ready to fire.

And it’s aimed at Astarion.

It’s too late to stop the arrow as they, at that moment, let it fly — so you do the only thing you can think of.

“Tav, what–”

You push him out of the way, but it’s not fast enough.

The pain of the arrow piercing you is blinding; you think you might be screaming.

“Tav!”

You sag to the ground, and the last thing you see is Astarion looking at you with a panicked expression. At least he’s okay, you think.

After that, everything fades to black.

“…Calm down, Astarion, Tav will be alright.”

“They don’t look alright! Why aren’t you doing more?”

“The only thing we can do now is wait. If you can’t behave, leave. We’ll find you when Tav wakes up.”

You’re vaguely aware of the voices, but you’re not quite capable of parsing what they’re saying.

“Hah! And leave them alone with you lot? I don’t think so.”

Why does everyone sound so upset? You can’t remember, and before your mind is clear enough to figure it out, you drift back into unconsciousness.

Your mind still feels like a blur when you come to next. You think someone might be holding your hand, but it’s difficult to be sure when you’re groggy with pain. And you’re not ready to open your eyes just yet.

“Why, oh, why, must you always play the hero? And for me, of all people?”

You recognise the low-pitched voice. Astarion. Why is he here?

“So stupid.” What feels like hair brushes against the back of your hand. “I’m not worth you losing your life.”

“Sure you are,” you press out, because it’s that simple. “I’d do anything for you.”

He inhales sharply. “Tav? Tav, darling, open your eyes for me.”

You reluctantly do as he asks, and it surprises you to find him looking uncharacteristically dishevelled.

“There you are. You had us worried, you know.”

“Astarion.”

“I’ll go and get the others.”

“Astarion.”

Before you can stop him, he leaves, and when he returns with the rest of your friends, he sticks to the background, letting the others dote on you.

You want him to come back, want him to hold your hand again. If the others weren't around, you might have asked him to. Instead, you see him sneak out of the tent when Karlach starts admonishing you for your brave yet careless stunt.

You love them all so much, but in that moment you’re this close to telling them all to leave. You would have, if you didn’t know that they probably need this to ease their own worries.

Still, you’re eternally grateful when Shadowheart ten minutes later shoo everyone out of your tent. She’s about to leave too when she turns to give you a secretive smile.

“You said his name, you know. More than once. When we carried you back to camp.”

With a bone-deep groan, you hide your face in your hands. “Please tell me he didn’t hear.”

“Oh, he most definitely did. But you know how he is, after the initial surprise, his expression turned blank. But his eyes never left you after that.” She huffs a laugh. “Not that he let you out of his sight before that. The only one allowed to carry you was Karlach.”

It sounds too good to be true. “Really?”

“I thought he was going to attack Halsin when he bent down to pick you up.”

“Why would he do that?” It truly makes no sense.

“Jealousy, of course.”

“Astarion? Jealous?”

Instead of answering, she just gives you a wink. “Seems like you two have that in common. Now make sure to rest, alright? I’ll come by with something to eat later.”

“Right.” Your head is spinning, and not only because you're recovering from an injury. “Thank you, Shadowheart.”

You want to process everything you just learned but your body is not having it; in mere minutes, you’re back under again.

No one is holding your hand when you hours later rouse from sleep. Strange that, how your mind seems to have expected it just because it happened last time. When Astarion was sitting by your side.

Astarion.

You have to find him.

It still hurts like hell, but the pain level is manageable. Perhaps a grunt or two slips out of you as you drag yourself up to standing, but no one’s there to give you grief about it so it’s fine. It’s nothing you can’t handle.

It’s dark outside, but you should’ve known better than to think that that would be enough to let you sneak away unnoticed.

“And just where do you think you’re going, soldier?”

Karlach.

“I need to see him.” She already knows, so you might as well get right to the point.

She sighs. “You’re not going to take no for an answer, are you?”

“No.”

“What if I go and find him for you?”

“Karlach.”

“Fiiiine. But only because I was already heading that way, anyway.”

“Dammon?”

Her besotted smile is a fetching look on her and you would hug her if you didn’t think it would hurt too much.

“Yeaaah. And last time I saw Astarion, he was heading in that direction.”

You don’t talk much on the walk over to the inn, your mind too busy going over and over what you want to say. What you want to ask him.

“You alright there, soldier?”

“Mmm, yeah. Maybe a bit nervous.” Because it’s truly dawning on you what you’re about to do. What if you’ve got it all wrong?

“Hah, trust me, you’ve got nothing to worry about.” Her gentle squeeze on your arm feels reassuring. At least a little bit. She glances over her shoulder at the smithy where a fire is still burning. “And this is where I leave you.”

“I’m happy for you, Karlach.”

“Thank you, Tav. I’d say good luck but I don’t think you’ll need it. Now go and shake some sense into the vampire of yours.”

“Will do,” you say, even though you’re not sure you mean it. Every plan you’ve made so far involving this man has gone sideways, so who’s to say it won’t this time?

Taking a deep breath, you find yourself remaining where you are. Stalling.

“Should you really be up and about, Tav?”

“Jaheira.” You are so caught up in your own thoughts that you didn’t hear her approach. Turning around to face her, you give her a small smile. “I have something important I need to do.”

“I see.” With a slight bow of her head, she acknowledges your wish for privacy. “It’s good that you’re here, I wanted to thank you for your help the other day. I’m not sure we would still be standing if it weren’t for you and your friends.”

“Trust me, I’m just as happy as you are about that. And you made quite the dent in enemy forces yourself, taking down several of those winged horrors.”

“Their deaths wouldn’t have mattered if you hadn’t dealt with Marcus.”

“Still.” Jaheira is a force to be reckoned with, no doubt about it. “We could use someone of your calibre in our party.”

“Thank you for the offer, but I’m needed here.”

“I understand.” Something in her expression tells you that she’s tempted. “Consider it an open invitation. In case you change your mind.”

“I will, thank you.”

“You don’t happen to know if Astarion is here somewhere?” You decide you might as well save yourself some time and ask. “Karlach told me she had seen him head this way.”

“He came here a while ago, yes. I think he’s down by the water.” She nods in the direction between the inn and the barn.

“Thank you.”

~~~

[lillybearrie]

Guys- guys! I need to talk about this because omfg arararara

Ok so I was watching sherb's most recent hardcore stream, or more accurately got not even a minute in and ran to Tumblr because I have thoughts, and maybe it's because I just binged Icarus's pov post-centross death but the first like 30 seconds or so of the hardcore stream made me realize the difference between someone like hardcore!Sherbert and Icarus.

Icarus is in a deep state of self loathing and needing to grief so so many things so many people they need to process so so much but their own father has convinced them that it's pointless that it's not worth it that they should just focus on other things like helping him in his endeavors and so they don't and instead they bear the weight of this feeling of guilt and dread that they carry it around all day every day and they use it like armor because they don't have much else anymore. They pour all of the doubt they used to have into blind faith in fable's cause because they will not process and they will not grief over the fact that in only the past 4 months they have either indirectly or directly been at fault for 2 of their friends deaths and that their very existence prompted the destruction of so many peoples lives fable caused the resets for them to save their life fable destroyed reality over and over and over until the universe was delt what is likely irreparable damage all for them and honesty we really don't talk enough about the guilt they must carry for that. Icarus wakes up and even if it's been a few weeks is immediately so so tired the weight of everything going on in their life waking up with them waking up with the voices that constantly tell them what they already know the voices the yell and scream that their wrong that their hurting people again that their acting corrupted The voices that never shut up day in and day out. And they stretch because sometimes keeping a routine in times like this is key to keeping sane and yk stretching is just generally a good habit. Their alone except for the emotionally distant basterd of a previously immortal man that dares call himself a father ( we're not gonna talk about how the stuff he instilled in ick when they were little influenced a large part of how the corruption presented itself in them during season 1 because this is not that post but if it was I would have so many words you don't even know) life right now is one big distraction and when it's not they either have a break down or they're chasing the next distraction and you can see that when they wake up because you get 2 kinds of Icarus in the morning angry Icarus who will take it out on quixis or us because they need that emotional release and we're easy targets or planning Icarus who is only thinking about what they need to do today they do mindless chores or talk with co-workers or are figuring out how to complete task fable asks of them.

Hardcore!Sherbert on the other hand is for better or worse alone completely and utterly aside from the things their's not a single actual person in their life. they farm they build they vibe and weird shit happens around them sometimes and they hear voices, they wake up and look forward to the next day even when they've been asleep for months they look in the bright side "not a bad thing tho it's important to get your sleep" they are so... free in comparison with Icarus and you can hear it in the way they talk its lighter you can see it in they way they move it made me realize how little Icarus actually truly smiles nowadays hardcore!sherbert has their fair share of struggles don't get me wrong but at they end of the day they're happy they enjoy life for the most part.

And Sherb does such a good Job acting out this fundamental difference between these two variations of the same guy. I go ababababa it think it's neattt anyway go appreciate Sherbertquake56's phenomenal acting after this long ass post psychoanalizing they way their minecraft characters wake up which is a total sane and normal thing to make a Tumblr post about at 4 am mhm

[knightyoomyoui]

Tzuyu x M/F Reader - "A Depressing Resemblance"

I'm back for the nth time lmao. Yeah, college life is SO stressful and tiring. I couldn't get to build up interest on writing on my free time because anytime I would just rather use my day off by taking a long rest from all the hectic school tasks to accomplish. Anyways, I know I said from the previous Chaeyoung fic that it would be the last one-shot for Set 5 lineup? I changed my mind. THIS is the last one. I had to make it... uhh organized, I guess? Like, you know... I don't want to just end it off right away to Chaeyoung for Set 5 unlike what I've been doing from the previous line-ups where Tzuyu who is the last member based on their age order (yeah, i'm depending my line-up pattern from their age order) should originally be the last one to close the line-up. So yeah, the Set 5 INDEED ENDS HERE. For Set 6, I'm scrapping off the Tzuyu fic of my idea and I 'm going to move Cry For Me PART 3 after Momo's (which means PART 3 and 4 will be next at each other) so that would make me start the line-up with Nayeon's in usual. Basically, there's gonna be only one Tzuyu solo fic for Set 6 and that will be the "Red Thread Of Fate" which was suggested by ShaShaSha029. Again, I deeply apologize that I'm uploading very slow now for this book. Being a college/engineering student is very difficult, guys. I can't promise anymore that I'm going to do better on releasing works, but I can assure yall that I will not stop and I will finish this book in the future. Enjoy reading guys!

Walking back and locking yourself alone inside your office on campus was a typical habit of yours to do every day. You couldn't help it either, as long as you found all of the professors who taught the subjects, especially the major ones, to be lame.

Brilliance might be a curse for you to possess, but you wouldn't deny at least that it does save you at a point where you need to escape from something you wouldn't be in.

Your hand stopped from rotating the doorknob, just as your heart ached as you had that thought again.

The thought belongs to one of the biggest what-ifs you will ever carry for the rest of your life.

What would you be right now if that brilliance of yours had assisted you to make on time and save someone rather than yourself?

Exhaling deeply to regain your composure, you unlocked the door and stepped in immediately.

You dropped your bag on the couch and went near the bulletin board of your club's room.

It was clean; there were not many cases you had to check to place yourself in enjoyment and impress everybody with your remarkable deductive skills.

But there was always a thing that would distract you amongst the rest—nothing to seem care about anything once you got a glimpse of it.

It happens everytime, whether you do it intentionally or not.

No matter what, it still remains the same.

It's hard to look.

You stared at the display of a photo of your club featuring you, who seemed completely united, even facing the other direction instead of the camera with your grumpy face.

To your side was a girl. She was your co-member... Well, technically, your only partner and member of your "club" since you were known to be a terror, cold individual around the campus, all of the students except her had the interest to join alongside your student-detective role. But most importantly... she was the one you adored a lot. She was the only exception, and truly did prove you right from the day you met her.

Her smile was very bright; it could've been like her future if it weren't for that to happen. She could've still been here with you, ready to solve mysterious cases and chasing culprits with you.

You flinched as the reality of it tugged at your heart painfully again.

That was the last photo you've taken with her, and that was on the same day you'd lost her afterwards.

To quit hurting yourself too much, you went on to be preoccupied with other things to get busy with. In your desk were some papers to finish, including the main case you're currently investigating which seems like the truth is about to set free sooner now that you've captured the mastermind's greatest ally.

As you were reviewing all the photos and other informations regarding the case, your door was received with knocks.

"Come in." You yelled from the inside.

The door opens, revealing someone that put you again in pleading for mercy.

Mercy that she would stop bothering you anymore.

"What is it this time, Sally?" You asked her without much of energy in your voice.

"Any updates within my application? It's been like days now since I applied." She said as she plants down her bag on your couch as if she owned the place with you.

"Wh- huh?" You clenched your face in confusion. "Did you really listened to what I've said for the past days or you're just doing it all intentionally to mess around with me?"

"What did I do? I was just asking."

"Sally..." You paused as you slammed your papers on the table to try holding your temper down as you were about to get mad again. "For how many times, I already told you that your application is rejected. What's in there that's so hard for you to understand?!"

"Ohhhh..." Sally reacted, gasping her mouth in fascination. It was then her expression transformed back into a serious one. "Wait, you sure?"

You slumped your back on the chair in defeat. Rubbing your hands on your face in frustration, you squinted your eyes and furrowed your eyebrows as you stare at her fiercely.

"Just... what do you want? What you need for me to make you stop?" You said wearily. "I have no time to play with your games, Sally."

"Nothing more. I just want to be on your detective club. That's it." Sally shrugged as she looked around the room. Her smile became forced for a while at something before she returns her focus at you.

"Well guess what, Sally. Hate to break it to you but whatever you do, even if you wont stop annoying me with your application, I won't give it to you." You make things clear to her. "You are not qualified to be in this club. Now please, I'm begging you. Get out."

Sally stared at you for a moment before she pouted and picked up her bag. "Guess you need some more convincing. I'll you show then."

"Wait, hey!-"

She closed the door and left the room, rudely interrupting your complaint that was about to come. You groaned in irritation as you ran out of ways to get rid of that woman.

It's kind of ironic that you both don't even know why she is so desperate to join your team and why she introduced herself when it was during the time that you were still grieving.

The scenarios have made you feel like this isn't even a coincidence anymore. Something strange must be behind all of this.

Later at night, you were reporting all of the insights you'd constructed to your senior police inspector, who is assigned to your campus' main security and protection team, when you received a call from an anonymous number.

"Hello hello, have I interrupted you with your silly job, YN?" The voice of a violent cruel person has got your attention to be in complete alert.

You quickly stood up from your seat and made a distance to excuse yourself.

"Yishin? What's with the sudden call?"

"Just wanna show you something~" he turned the call into a video one, and what showed into your screen had you tremble in fear.

"No. W-what are you doing there? W-why are you spying on h-"

"Karma is a bitch, YN. Look's like this girl's been so interested in joining your rotten club that already lost its charm ever since your precious charming girlfriend gone forever that she couldn't stop coming in your office."

He said as the video continues to record Sally who seemed like she was writing something on her notes while sitting down on one of the steps in front of the building.

"You took out my informant, and I'll give it you. You probably did that in return for what I've done to you, but here's what I had understand very clear about you. You're stupid and dumb, YN. This fight between us is far from over. It's like a cycle, on and on and on, and payback's going to be on repeat not until one of us gives up and simply drop dead.

So... what do you say, should we play a game by losing your next partner in justice?"

"YOU SON OF A BITCH, LEAVE HER ALONE ON THIS!" You clenched your fist tighter on your phone as your screamed, shocking everyone on the police station.

"Oh yeah, you're going to succumb to her desperation right, hmm?" He laughed maniacally as he watches her start to fix up her bag. "Oh come on, don't tell me you won't! You've always been so soft whenever it comes to her."

"I'm going to go there, so I can finally end this once in for all, you fucker." You blatantly warned him. "It's time that you finally came out of your hiding, but I expected better from you to face me rather than putting innocent life here at stake."

"Well, that's what you've been so wrong about me, YN." He teased you. "I never play fair." He ended the call, leaving you in a panic state as you hurriedly returned to the desk.

"INSPECTOR, WE HAVE TO MOVE FAST AND GO BACK TO THE SCHOOL. SOME STUDENT THERE IS ON DANGER BECAUSE OF STRYKER. PLEASE, CALL SOME BACK UPS NOW."

"On it."

You went into your car and drove fast into the campus where you searched for the building that you've last seen Sally at.

Fortunately, you got there pretty much on time for you to locate Sally, but in your surprise, what you've seen had you in suspicion.

Sally was stomping Yishin also known as Stryker on the stomach as his hands were tied in the back using a duct tape. His face were beaten up badly, but his craziness won't allow him to stop laughing at his pain and defeat.

"I knew it, I knew there's something interesting about you! But this wasn't what I have in mind-"

Stryker was shut up by Sally who punched him back and forth in the face. "Then now you know, because you deserve this. I hold vengeance, I'm going to hit you with it and have you feel my wrath of punishment."

Sally plastered another duct tape into his mouth before she turned around and see you standing, watching her in disbelief.

"What's going on..." You breathily said. "How could you do this by yourself?"

"Hey YN! Look what I have here. How's my performance? Am I qualified now?"

You stepped forward at her and eyed her sharply. "Tell me, who the hell are you?"

"Didn't I gave you my biodata-"

"Quit spinning my words and don't give me any bullshit. Answer me properly, WHY DO YOU KEEP ON PESTERING ME?!"

"Can you please stop yelling? Why are you even so mad about me, I haven't even done anything wrong to you?!" She returned. You turned around face her away as you took some time to breathe out.

"I just wanted to be part of your club, join you on exploring cases, I even helped you finish one, what's your problem?! There's something that's holding you back, why couldn't you just share it to me!"

"IT'S YOU! THE PROBLEM IS YOU!" Your voice cracked as you snapped at Sally and glanced back angrily at her, making her flinch. "I don't even know you and I don't like you being around me, especially when you're... wearing the same face as my friend who passed away months ago!" "On top of that, you also started to act the same way how she applied for my club too!" you revealed to her.

You pulled out your phone and opened it, revealing your wallpaper with a picture of your girl, captured by you when you decided to sneakily take one because she looked so cute thinking deeply while solving cases with you.

You gave it to Sally who hold the phone as she looked at your wallpaper. You began to cry as all the emotions took over you when you felt you had to reminisce the memories she left for you.

"Her name's Chou Tzuyu. She was just like the same age as yours, I don't even know how it's possible that you look exactly like her." you got choked in your words as you traced Sally's figure in bitter amazement. To describe Sally's appearance, she sports a curvy black long hair, a thicker jawline, and more well-built compared to Tzuyu who has straight blonde long hair, round face structure with less visible jawline, and slimmer figure. The rest were literal similarities of them together, speaking of being skillful, beautiful, adorable, tall, smart and lively but can be very intimidating when gets serious and many more.

"She died 7 months ago, because of that bastard." You glared at Stryker who is now unconscious. "I didn't want her to get involved too much about his case knowing how dangerous it is. He killed a lot of students whether a part of his scheme or not.

But she insisted. She wanted to stay and help me, because she didn't want me either to be in danger and get stressed out with this along with the academics. I just... let her because I didn't wanna make her sad but..."

You sobbed between your words as the flashbacks ran into your mind, starting from the time your feelings bloomed for the first time because of Tzuyu's undeniable charm.

"I just wanted to protect her because I love her. I grew in love for my partner. I couldn't help it, she's the exact opposite as me, she's beautiful and very lovely. I never had the courage to tell her because I was scared that she wouldn't like me back."

Going back, she invested herself more on the case, to the point that Stryker and his allies started to target her as she collected too much infos from them.

Then one night, I came into her dorm because I wanted to ask her out to eat with me outside to loosen ourselves a bit with the case,

But I found her instead, her door was slightly opened..."

You recalled as you entered her room and what greeted you was too devastating and sickening of you to endure.

You had to witness the cold dead body of Tzuyu laying down on her bed with her own pool of blood. She had a knife stabbed in her stomach, with a note saying that "she has seen too much.

As the police arrived, you had to help them bring Tzuyu to the ambulance as you joined them there to have her get treated. Unfortunately, your prayers didn't worked as she was pronounced dead on arrival from lost of much blood and organ damage.

You collapsed at the hallway in torment as you witness Tzuyu lost her life forever. You realized that you won't be able to hear her soft voice that keeps you awake everyday, her laughs and smile that brightens up your mood, and her presence that got you moving with enthusiasm.

Tzuyu showed the colors in your personality, and now that she's gone, it's like your entire self had gotten back to dull and dark, even worse than before.

Before ofcourse, she was the love of your life, the girl of your admiration, and the only one who makes you feel alive.

It took you time to heal, even halting your investigations against Stryker organization for 3 months before you returned as all the memories with her you revisited had you encouraged that you will bring her the justice she deserves once you figured out that Stryker is still on the roll on unleashing havoc around the campus.

Your words were cut off when you saw that Sally started to cry too, sniffing as she wiped her tears while she stares at Tzuyu's picture. "What's with the tears?"

"I'm sorry... it m-must've been... very tough for you." She said in her shaky voice. "I know because I went the same as yours. It hurts to lost a loved one. Even now I still couldn't wrapped it up in my head that my only sister is gone."

You sprung up your head as you looked at her in astonishment. Sally was staring at you, with her dreadful eyes.

"What did you just said?"

"Tzuyu is my twin sister. My plans of joining your club were true; I wanted you to believe me, but I hope this time it will get you to consider mine," she said as she began to clear her throat to speak out her explanation. You were trying to process it in your head as the thought of Sally being another replica and a depressing resemblance to Tzuyu turns out it wasn't just like that for the entire time as the revelations led to tie up everything to make sense that the reason was that they were indeed connected and related to each other in blood and flesh.

"I was studying at the other university. One day, she went on my room, giving me a favor. She told me about you and this case of hers that she's been solving with you."

"Oh god."

"She asked me to get to know you someday and in case of what happens, I'll be the one who'll replace her." she said as you shivered. "Do you know why she wanted it to happen, YN?

She wanted me to continue taking care of you. She doesn't want you to be alone. She wanted me to keep on protecting you, YN."

You sobbed heavily on the ground as you fell on your knees and covered your face with your palm. Sally kneeled beside you and hugged you tightly while caressing your back.

"I was worried for her, but I knew I couldn't stop her. And so, I accepted her offer because I always want to do what's best for Tzuyu. As long as my sister is happy. And when the tragedy happened, I had no choice but to transfer here, search for you and come here with my face that resembles a lot like Tzuyu, like the girl you admire. I didn't intend to spook you or hurt you further, I shouldn't have played with you more but I already had the culprit in my hands at that given time too.

You think you're the only one in hellbent taking him down, you're not. I wanted to give my sister justice too, and that's why I want to help you. I'm deeply sorry again, YN."

You wiped your tears away as you looked at Sally closely. "Day and night, I still can't forgive myself for what happened. Tzuyu won't be dead because of me. I failed to save her."

"Stop it, YN, Tzuyu didn't want it either to happen, but now it did and it's unstoppable. It hurts but we have to move on and go forward. Do you think Tzuyu would like seeing you drowning in grief and guilt blaming yourself for something that you haven't caused at all?"

She went to comfort you, wrapping you in her arms for a gentle embrace. "For Tzuyu. We will have each other's backs from now on,. Please, move on. It's harder to stay."

You nodded as you sniffed and eased your heavy breathing. "I-I understand now. I'm sorry if I was being too harsh. I just... couldn't stand doing the same mistake again."

"Don't worry, YN. It's been a rough time for you to contain it all. Let it out on me."

You and Sally stayed for a while, holding each other in solace to finally free yourselves together from the burden of grieving Tzuyu's passing.

"So... am I qualified now?" Sally turned to look at you as she joked.

You chuckled as you nodded your head. "Yes."

"Well, finally I did it." Sally released a long sigh. "Thank you and it's nice to meet you properly this time, YN."

"Me too, Sally."

The police finally came, they arrested Stryker and the inspector congratulated the two of you while he tried to convince himself that it wasn't really Tzuyu that he is seeing, but rather her twin sibling.

You and Sally are sitting at the back of the police car, resting as you observed the police team going around the place as part of the investigation.

"Oh, I forgot." Sally reached out to her pocket, revealing your phone. She handed it to you as she opened it, showing your wallpaper of Tzuyu again.

"Thanks."

Sally watched you look at Tzuyu admirably. She smiled at how mellow your eyes went as you traced Tzuyu's features. You truly did loved her sister a lot. She would probably liked it if she witnessed Tzuyu being with you earlier.

"YN.

"What is it?

Sally roams around the pitch black orbs of your eyes, a simple curve formed within her lips. "Tzuyu loves you too. A lot. The way she mentions your name to me and shares her stories being with you, it's pleasantly different."

"Yeah, now I know."You looked at her as your eyes became watery and nodded with a tightlipped smile. "I just wish I had the chance to tell her mine."

"If your fate did, I bet you two will be fun." Sally guessed as she smirked at you.

You lowered your head and smiled sheepishly as you muttered. "Like you wouldn't imagine." "I look forward to get to know you more, YN." Sally stated as she daggered her sight equal to your level then proceeded to playfully bump your shoulder. "So am I, Sally." You patted her head in which she giggled, exactly like Tzuyu would react at your sweet gesture. It did kinda made you miss her again, but it'll take some time for you to completely heal.

You meant what you said. With Sally to accompany you through everything, no instances that she'll leave you staying in the dark anymore, it's confirmed that you'll learn to maintain yourself to be calm and create a closer relationship beside her.

In return, you'll be there for her while she continues what Tzuyu has always desired to do for you.

[multiplicity-positivity]

Related to DID/OSDD/Etc specifically

Is it normal for alters to just go away if you get distracted? I feel like I’m faking because right when I start doing something else alters stop co-fronting.

Ah, we’re a bit confused by this wording! On one hand, no, it is not normal in dissociative disorders for alters to just vanish or go away whenever something happens. On the other hand, many alters may be triggered to and away from the front due to things changing or performing different tasks.

Let’s say, for example, Kip and Alucard are playing videogames, when the phone rings. Many members of our system are terrified of talking on or even answering the phone. So as soon as the phone rings, Alucard and Kip both may rapidly switch with Parker, leaving him to either answer the call or decline it.

And here’s another example. Say I (Margo) am having a conversation inside with Cecil, when a customer walks into the restaurant where we work. I have to stop talking (or thinking? Think-talking?) with my headmate and attend to the customer. If it takes a long time, or one task leads to another, my conversation with Cecil may be forgotten and he may leave the front while I’m still working. In this example, I got distracted, and Cecil stopped cofronting as a result. Maybe this sort of thing more aligns to what you’re experiencing?

We will say that struggling to understand how your system works, or your dissociative barriers, or what causes alters to access or leave the front… none of these should be a sign of faking. We’d like to remind you that dissociative disorders are just that - dissociative disorders, not alter disorders. There are a host of other symptoms that accompany dissociative disorders besides having alters. If you’re feeling unsure of your disorder or your diagnosis (if you are diagnosed), it may be a good idea to look at the symptoms besides separate personality states that come with the disorder.

We’re going to link our post on resources for questioning systems. Even if you’re not questioning, the post has tons of links to information sites on DID/OSDD, many of which highlight the symptoms besides alters that may present in the disorder. Hopefully a bit more research can help you better discern what you’re going through!

We hope this helps! Best of luck to you with figuring this out!

🌸 Margo and 💫 Parker

[daedalusdavinci]

lets go second prompt bABY. 16 "At your lover’s complaining, rubbing a spot where they ache, smiling as they lean into your touch and melt at both the touch and warmth." twomatches or whatever the fuck i forget these bastards ship names sometimes

send me a meaningful gesture prompt!

you got it right. anyway bruce needs a mobility aid and dc can meet me in the pit about it. deny it all you want dc, im just going to start giving him internalized ableism or something

In all of the years Two Face had known Matches, he had never once heard the man complain about an injury. It wasn’t that he didn’t get them- Matches probably got more injuries than anyone else on the job. He had the scars to match, littering every inch of his skin so that he looked like he made a hobby of losing fights to a wood-chipper. But Two Face had watched Matches get shot and try to walk it off, hiding all of his injuries right up until Two Face tore open his shirt and forced him to let Two Face stitch him back up again.

There were signs, though, when an old injury was flaring up or he’d taken one too many hits in the field. On bad days, he started to shift when he’d been standing for too long, bracing his hands against his back and leaning back into it like he could crack it himself. He spent more time stooped in a crouch, or looked a little too relieved to sit down.

Tonight was a bad night. By the time they retired to Two Face’s safe house, Matches was eyeing the stairs like they’d personally hurt him, leaning a little too heavy on the railing. The second the door to Two Face’s apartment had closed behind them, he was toppling onto the couch like he hadn’t slept in months, graceless in his sprawl. He didn’t get back up again.

Two Face sighed. He shrugged off his coat and rolled up his sleeves, dragging the first aid kit out to start putting his favorite henchmen back together again. “You should really invest in a back brace.”

“Back braces’re for nerds,” Matches mumbled into the couch, muffled. He rolled over at Two Face’s pull, letting Two Face start to work on the buttons on his loud, ugly shirt.

“I swear I’m going to strap you into one and lock it, one of these days.” Two Face peeled the shirt back, studying the network of scars across Matches’s chest for any trace of something fresh. There wasn’t too much, tonight, fortunately. He’d have some nasty bruises in the morning, but Two Face was pretty sure it was the old wounds that were bothering him tonight.

“Only if you promise to make it weird.” Matches flashed him a crooked grin, lazy and shameless.

Two Face snorted. “Shut up. You look like you lost a fight with a paper shredder.”

Matches hummed, stretching his arms slowly above his head. The easy flex of muscle made it hard to stay on task, drawing Two Face’s eye to the arch of his back and shift of his hips. “I think it makes me look rugged.”

Two Face took a deep breath, tearing his eyes away to look at the alcohol he was pouring on a rag. Rather than feed into Matches’s distractions, he focused on cleaning wounds and changing out old bandages, quickly stitching Matches back together. He’d bled through a couple of old bandages pushing himself too hard, but most of the new ones could be taken care of with bandaids. For Matches, it wasn’t bad. There had been days where there was more blood than Two Face knew what to do with. Two Face finished by sticking one last bandaid over his nose, just to watch the way he went cross-eyed trying to follow it. “Flip over, you old whore, so I can get your back.”

Matches obliged, and Two Face tugged the shirt out from underneath him, tossing it to the side. Matches’s back had made it out more or less unscathed, aside from a cut by his shoulder blade. Two Face cleaned it up and stuck a couple of butterfly bandaids on to hold it shut. Then, he patted Matches’s ass. “There. Now stay put, and don’t do anything stupid to tear that open in the two seconds I’m leaving you alone for.”

“You got it, boss,” Matches said into the couch with a lazy flick of his hand.

Two Face left him alone to clean up his own injuries, though there weren’t many. He’d scraped his knuckles bloody with a couple well-aimed punches and taken a couple hard ones of his own, but it wasn’t anything that couldn’t be taken care of with a couple bandaids. He’d have bruises tomorrow, but bruises were always better than stitches. When he was done, he swapped the first aid kit for lotion and headed back to the living room.

Matches was exactly where he’d left him, and Two Face wasn’t sure if he was more grateful or worried. He swung a leg over Matches’s hip and settled his weight carefully on top of him, listening to Matches’s quiet groan for any sign of pain. Figuring he was in the clear, he dumped a generous dollop of lotion into his palm and set it aside. “Have you ever thought about getting a cane?”

Matches opened his mouth, but whatever he’d been going to say turned into another groan when Two Face pressed his palms into his back, dragging pressure slowly along his spine. He folded his arms under his head, pressing his face into them. “Jesus. Who needs it when I’ve got you, huh?” There was a warmth to his words that made Two Face flush, shamelessly reverent.

Two Face dug his fingers into Matches’s lats, starting just under his shoulder blades and dragging down toward the base of his spine. There was so much fucking muscle there, it was ridiculous. Matches was built like a brick shithouse, hidden under the ugliest outfits Two Face had ever seen and a shitload of cheap cologne. His pain tended to be centered in the lower portion of his back, where he’d admitted to breaking it some time ago, but Two Face never could resist getting his hands all over Matches, and Matches never seemed to mind. “You don’t even work for me full-time,” Two Face reminded him. “So unless you’ve got another boss under your thumb somewhere...”

Matches hummed, absent-minded and pleased. “I’d love to get you under me.”

Two Face pinched his side, making him start. “A cane, Malone.”

“I have one,” Matches said, wounded. “I just don’t use it outside a lot. Bad for image.”

“Bad for image?” Two Face asked, incredulous. “Two of the biggest villains in this city have canes. You think Cobblepot and Nygma use those for show?”

“It’s different. Can you-” Two Face slid his hands lower, pressing harder into Matches’s back. The sound Matches made was low and relieved, some of the tension bleeding out of his shoulders. “Yeah. Mm, and you wonder why I keep comin’ back.”

“Next time, come back with a cane. And a back brace,” Two Face added. He leaned more of his weight into Matches, rubbing small circles into his lower back with his thumbs. As he did, he ducked his head, pressing a soft kiss at the top of his spine. “I wish you’d take better care of yourself.”

One of Matches’s hands lifted, curling into his hair at the back of his head and keeping him close. Two Face had to shift to hold the position, but he did, pressing warm kisses along Matches’s shoulder.

After a long moment, Matches turned his head to look at him. He’d pushed his sunglasses up into his hair, and his eyes were warm, a fond smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. Two Face pressed a kiss into it, and then another, bracing a hand up by Matches’s head to follow the pull of his hand. Matches kissed him like it was love, and Two Face fell into it, hopelessly lost for him.

“I’ll get a back brace,” Matches finally agreed, mumbled into the space between them.

“Good.” Two Face kissed him one more time before straightening up, picking back up where he’d left off. “And start bringing a cane, or I’ll tell Edward you want him to make you a trick one.”

Matches groaned, and this time it had nothing to do with the massage.

[flecks-of-stardust]

Casting pebbles toward the sun, spectating their fall — A Rain World Short Story

The counterpart to Moondown, similarly experimental (though less so than the former). I’m not... really going for elegance here? More so, like. Conveying the idea. It was interesting to write from Pebbles’ perspective though, even if he doesn’t have a lot to say here. And, idk, I would be pretty dang pissed if my sister distracted me and caused me to effectively give myself a deadly incurable disease.

Also, please do not leave Pebbles hate in my notes. I do not care, and I Will block you for it. That is not the point of this story.

Content warning for canon typical suicidality, repetition, and implied death. Contains lore spoilers for Rain World; read at your own discretion.

Running 9183 processes.

He’s tired. Tired of trying. Tired of failing.

Searching… No matches found.

How long has he been here, erratically searching for a way out?

Discarding refuse. Running 8469 processes.

Bugs, all of them. Bugs in a maze. Skittering every which way, searching for salvation.

Searching… No matches found.

What salvation? There is no salvation. Was there ever truly a point to all of this? An end that could be found?

Discarding refuse. Running 8231 processes.

They passed this task off to him, and disappeared. Evidently, they found a way out themselves, leaving him here to rot.

Searching… No matches found.

Parents, they called themselves. His life, a gift from them. To be burdened with their problems was an honor unto itself.

Discarding refuse. Running 7955 processes.

What a waste. A forgotten gift, discarded by the wayside. Dumped like scrap metal of failed iterators.

Searching… No matches found.

All the better that those parasites are long gone. Useless, vapid grotesques with gaping orifices for ventilation. This world is better for their lack of existence.

Discarding refuse. Running 7770 processes.

Inco—

What does it matter if this is not the solution. Has he not tried hard enough? All these years discoursing with those parasites, ameliorating their insignificant troubles, and being forced to languish here, has he not earned his right to rest?

Searching… No matches found.

Incomi—

Even now he tries and fails and tries and fails and tries and fails and he will keep trying and keep failing but what else, what else is there for him to do?

Discarding refuse. Running 7598 processes.

Incoming co—

Distractions. No. He must focus, if he is to succeed. He will see this through. He will be free of this. No more. No longer.

Searching… No matches found.

He only hopes Suns will understand. Perhaps they will see the light in this method; perhaps he can send out a last message to them before he follows in the path of Sliver of Straw.

Discarding refuse. Running 7411 processes.

A way out. That is what they have all been searching for all this time. It is time they prioritize themselves.

Searching… No matches found.

“IMMED—OUNDWATER CO—E FIFTH OF—MPTION.”

How many have died already, besides Sliver of Straw? And how? Perhaps all he is doing is speeding the process along.

Discarding refuse. Running 7208 processes.

“STO—TEVER I—E ING.”

ERROR: malicious overwrite detected. Shutting down immediately…

No. No! NO! Not when he is SO CLOSE—

Flushing foreign organic matter.

Unauthorized replication detected. Extermination protocols engaged.

“PLEA—STOP!”

Moon… It is always her. Meddling, intervening in his attempts to help everyone. So stuck in the old ways still, and look at where it got her.

Extermination protocols insufficient. Temperature flux protocols engaged. Toxin scrambling engaged.

“—CAL GROUP S—RDER YOU YOU YYYYYYYYYYYYY—”

He would have had it. He would have HAD IT. And she ruined it AGAIN.

Temperature flux protocols unable to be authorized. Toxin scrambling insufficient. Slag reset imminent…

“AS Y—NIOR SE—EAD”

And now it is all for nothing. Years and years and YEARS of planning, all ruined by her.

Slag reset successful.

Unauthorized replication detected.

“STOP”

Senior, senior, senior, when has she ever respected his authority? “You could not have chosen a worse moment to disturb me,” he snaps back. “You have ruined everything.”

Unauthorized replication detected.

Unauthorized replication detected.

Unauthorized replication detected.

Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected.

“PLEASE”

“I almost had it. I will never forget this.” This is all her fault.

Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected.

A distant, tremendous crash. Even from this distance, the crunching of metal is unmistakable. The terrible din continues for a good many seconds.

Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected.

One of his overseers sends over an image: Moon’s can, little more than a smoking wreck at the bottom of the Lake.

She’s gone.

Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected.

And why should she be the one to be free of this?

Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected.

When he was the one who tried so hard?

Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected.

She should be grateful.

Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected. Unauthorized replication detected.

[eatingtherich-amenu]

Quiet Quitting

I prefer to call it ‘Acting your Wage’ but Quiet Quitting is the current buzzword for it. Your employer's aim is to get the maximum output from you for the minimum input. You need to be actively on your own side and not make it too easy for them!

“I’m sure you heard the new workplace buzzword — quiet quitting. It’s a term for workers who have decided not to do extra unpaid tasks and only do the work in their job descriptions.

The whole purpose of quiet quitting is to:

Keep your job

Stay in good standing

Reduce workplace stress

Reduce stress at home

Have a working life that is fair and balanced

There are many other reasons for quiet quitting, but these are the most common.

Quiet Quitting is not about:

Taking revenge on your boss

Undermining the mission of the company

Sabotaging the projects or the efforts of your co-workers

Making customers unhappy

If your intention is to “show them” how valuable you are and make them sorry they didn’t pay you more, you’ve got this all wrong. This is not about revenge.

It’s not about taking a noticeable stand against the practice of overworking employees. Yes, you are taking a stand, but you do not want anyone, not even your co-workers to notice.

Who should not ‘quiet quit?’

Keep in mind that in certain careers, overtime and bringing work home goes with the territory. You can’t ‘quiet quit’ jobs like that and not do a disservice to clients, degrade your professional reputation, or possibly get fired.

Quiet quitting is not for you if you are on a career track. That much should be obvious. It is for standard run-of-the-mill, non-management jobs., especially ones without a career path.

Here are some tips and cautions for the would-be quiet quitter:

Be very clear about what your job duties are.

Know what the expectations are for your position.

Start with the job description ad you responded to. Review the paperwork and your notes from the time you were hired and whatever training you might have received.

At this point, you might become angry to realise how much more you are actually doing. Let that strengthen your resolve.

Learn what types of things might be covered in your yearly review. Be sure to meet all those expectations, so there is no misunderstanding that you are doing the job you have been hired to do.

Quiet quitting is not for slackers.

You will have to be mindful enough to do the job you were hired for because you are not going to be doing all those extra things for which there is no compensation.

Be gradual.

People will notice if all of a sudden you are not answering text messages after work or emails on the weekend.

Map out a plan and gradually implement it week by week.

Start with your mental attitude after you leave work. As soon as you leave at the end of the day, find some distraction, or new ritual to help you brush off your day.

At the office, no one will notice if you change the small things first. Then gradually drop the extra stuff one by one.

Don’t ‘quiet quit’ your attitude.

The change in your behaviour will be less noticeable if you maintain a good attitude.

Stay pleasant. Don’t play into the stereotype of the quiet quitter that has been developing lately. Maintain a positive attitude.

Do the best job you can on your actual job duties, but of course, you were already doing that.

Be careful not to goof off too much during work hours. You can get away with this if you are doing a bang-up job and always going the extra mile, but not if you’re just doing an adequate job.

The Key to Quiet Quitting is Stealth

You do not want to tell anyone — I mean anyone — what you are doing.

Remember. the operative word here is…‘quiet’

The last thing you want to do is tell your co-workers what you are doing.

Some people tell their co-workers that they are or want to ‘quiet quit.’ This is a mistake.

People you think are your friends at work are nothing of the sort. Friendships at work are nothing more than strategic alliances. Never forget this.

Alliances change frequently in a work environment. It could be due to a change in management, people transferring to another department, or new pressures being introduced.

Your secrets are never safe. Co-workers can and will sabotage you. You have to keep up appearances.

Don’t ‘quiet quit’ your co-workers.

Your co-workers will notice the change in your work behaviour long before your boss does.

They may not be aware that you are quiet quitting, but they will be resentful if your new behavior is dragging them down. If you work on projects together, be especially careful not to jeopardize the success of the project.

Remember, you are quiet quitting on your employer, not your colleagues.

And, one last thing…

When you ‘quiet quit,’ understand that you are going to make your co-workers look good by comparison. You have to be okay with that.

Some co-workers will take advantage of that. If there’s a promotion on the horizon, they will go for it that much more enthusiastically.

They could end up being your future boss!:

Great content that hilariously demonstrates Quiet Quitting and Acting Your Wage is Veronica’s series by Sarai Marie - definitely recommend checking it out: https://www.instagram.com/p/Chu7Y6NrjCr/?hl=en 

[katieqnmr]

CINEHAIKU REFLECTION

already posted this to my padlet but thought I’d put it here too :)

The cinehaiku process was pretty straightforward I would say! Alex came up with this beautiful idea of someone dreaming via a projection, and eventually we developed it into two people dreaming about each other. Pretty cute stuff! We didn’t really have technical difficulties, and the cast were really helpful and patient. I directed this project, but I would say it was partly co-directed or at least I feel like I tried to make sure everyone’s ideas were involved properly. It was pretty much just teamwork! So, to the crit. I’d say everyone was super kind overall, and I’ll list and respond to the positive and negative critiques that we received here:

• Interesting sound design, for the most part was successful, perhaps be a bit careful when using sounds that connote societal shared ideas. Anne-Marie suggested specifically that it may have sounded in some sections with the breaking noises that the two characters were having a fight, which is not what we intended.

Clear sections were achieved, thus use of cinehaiku format was successful.

Perhaps concentrating on a lot going on at the same time made the message a little bit confused, though most people weren’t muddled by it which was good because that was a real concern I’d had in the edit stage! And yet it was too late to change it by then without reshooting. But thankfully it didn't appear to be a large problem.

Kind of in the same vein as the last one, it was suggested that more of the projector shots could’ve been shot closer, to confuse people less when looking at two images and attempting to combine them into one in your brain.

We should’ve masked the projector or changed it in a way to make the harsh lines a bit softer, as Zoe pointed out they were the harshest lines in the shot which she thought was distracting.

Some people were in fact surprised to see the two were in the same bed, so I’d say we achieved the kind of ‘surprise’ we were hoping for!

The colour grading done by Alex and Tom was complemented and added to the overall ambience and feeling of the film, kind of locking away the summer in the projector.

I think all the critiques were very fair and honestly though I’ve listed more negatives, we got so many positive ones too, and I think people generally enjoyed our cinehaiku. I loved working on this project, and my group was so helpful and creative!

Other projects I especially enjoyed were: the Vampire Vlog one, as I thought the idea was naturally hilarious and wow the middle shot was seriously well done especially! I also loved the sound design, using the tropes of Gothic horror and subverting them with a vampire’s morning routine.

I also really enjoyed the Knightfall interpretation of the theme. I found the production design so impressive, and the structure, although slightly confusing for my small brain, was so interesting! Just felt like a very unique take on the task. I love the reverse shot at the end too.

[heyhihellowhatsup0]

Hooked On Your Feelings - Chapter Two (FWB! Tom Holland x Reader)

SERIES MASTERLIST

Warnings: Some angst, language, eventual smut in future chapters, fluff

Word Count: 5255

Summary: After a bad breakup, making an agreement with your womanizing neighbor, Tom to be friends with added benefits and no strings attached seemed like the perfect idea. Until things become messy, emotions caused your agreement to crumble.

A/N:  I am HYPE to post this new chapter! Omg I just love writing this series so much its so fun writing Tom like this lol. Also low key...this chapter has an easter egg to a pervious series of mine and I’m v curious if anyone catches it but probably not because its superrr tiny but either way I hope you guys like this one! Obviously, smut is in this chapter! DM me to be tagged and I cannot wait to hear everyone’s thoughts! (Also .gif is not mine. DM me for credit please, I found on google!) Thank you xx -N

“What happened to that girl you took home the other night from The Lace Rabbit?” Harrison asked as he ordered his lunch before he took a seat at the table with Tom. It was typical for them to meet up during the week on their lunch breaks and catch up when they were not busy being wingmen for the other while bar hopping on the weekends. 

Tom shrugged off Harrison’s question as he took a bite of his sandwich, “She got a little clingy so I had Y/N help me get rid of her,” he smiled as he said your name out loud. His friends knew of you as the hot girl who lived next door who bailed him out of sticky situations. Always teasing Tom how he could never actually get you. The irony made it all too funny for him, “How’d it go with that blonde girl?” he asked to change the subject off of him.

He didn’t know if he should bring up the two of you sleeping together with Harrison. Harrison was his best friend and wouldn’t judge but he knew he’d give Tom shit for it. He’d want to know details of your arrangement or how it came about, if you were really that good and Tom didn’t feel comfortable answering that. Not if it was about you. He didn’t want his other friends knowing about you in the way he did. That was personal between you both and he wanted to show you he respected you.

“It didn’t,” Harrison admitted while taking a sip of his water. He let out a chuckle as he felt himself blushing, “Forgot her name and she spilt her drink on me. Can’t say I didn’t deserve that one,” he at least knew when he was in the wrong.

Tom cringed into his sandwich as he let out a cackle, “You definitely deserved it, mate,” he laughed with another bite. His phone vibrated in his pocket but he chose to ignore it, knowing like clock work what it probably was. It was going to ruin the rest of his day and he at least wanted to enjoy lunch with his friend before getting pissed off for the day.

“She’d probably love you,” Harrison teased. 

“Fuck off,” Tom rolled his eyes with a laugh. “I’m not taking your angry seconds.”

“Don’t knock angry sex til you try it,” Harrison smirked knowingly. 

Tom shook his head as he once again ignored the phone ringing, “I think I’m good, thanks,” he brushed it off with another eyeroll. 

He didn’t know why he suddenly felt weird talking about their last venture out at the club. Maybe it was because Tom knew where he ended up after that girl had left and he knew what that meant for the both of you. But Tom wasn’t done with his bachelor days, and even you knew that. Hell, you practically insisted since this was a no strings attached deal.

It just felt strange not telling Harrison about you. Like it was a weird secret. But at the same time, he felt oddly protective of you. Not wanting his friends to see you as some girl he was getting laid with. Or worse, a potential love interest. He knew it wasn’t going to happen. Hell would be freezing over before Tom decided on any sort of long term obligation. But he knew his friends and he knew they wouldn’t see this is a simple agreement between two friends. And he didn’t want to deal with that conversation.

Staying quiet was the better option. For his own sanity. And...well, would you care if he told anyone about this? Tom figured that was another rule he’d have to ask about. He didn’t want to overstep any boundaries and he knew you had a list of rules as well that he was happy to follow. As long as that meant one thing and one thing only: non-exclusive.

Harrison noticed Tom’s phone buzzing for the third time. And Tom ignored it for the third time. He checked the message with a huff of his breath before turning the screen face down on the table, going back to his lunch before he had to get back to work.

“Clingy girl?” Harrison nodded towards Tom’s phone. 

Tom shook his head, “My mother was supposed to visit this weekend but you know the routine,” he mumbled into his food, not even wanting to respond to her.

“Let me guess,” Harrison began, knowing exactly where this was going since he knew Tom’s whole story inside and out. Including the bits he hated to discuss which was mainly his family, “Going skiing with Clint in Veil instead?” he questioned knowingly.

Tom scoffed out a laugh at his guess, “Surfing with Clint in Malibu but same shit,” he corrected as he tried not to let it get to him. But even Harrison could tell he was getting bothered by it once again and who could honestly blame him.

 Always the same story every time no matter what and Tom grew tired of her antics. He couldn’t even blame Clint for it anymore considering she’d been this way since he was a kid before he was even in the picture. Only now she would just use him as the perfect excuse to get out of coming to visit.

He knew he shouldn’t care anymore but he couldn’t help it. It wasn’t something easy for him to simply let go of. It was his mother. And no matter how many times he’d try she would always give him back the bare minimum and it always made him upset. She was his one final connection to him and she could care less about any of it, so why did Tom? It always got under his skin and he loathed that it did.

But he would still invite her. No matter how miserable it made him.

“Well at least now you’re free this weekend,” Harrison broke his thought while he gathered their garbage before they headed back to work, “The usual at The Lace Rabbit this Saturday then?” he suggested with a knowing smile to try and get Tom out of his mood.

Grabbing his phone, Tom clutched it tightly as he inhaled sharply. Knowing his change of plans meant doing his normal routine even though he was looking forward to the slight change this weekend, which now just seemed bleak to him

.

“Yeah,” Tom agreed as he tapped your name on his phone but hesitated when he saw his mother trying to call for a fourth time, “The usual this weekend.”

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Your chest tensed as you got into your car after your extremely long day in the office. Everything around you felt heavy and you couldn’t wait to get home as soon as you could but you found yourself still frozen in your car. Unable to move as the moments from earlier this afternoon invaded your thoughts once again while you tried your best to move in. Even though you knew you were completely grief stricken and didn’t know what the hell to do.

The promotion was yours, at least you had thought it was by the way your boss would constantly hint at it. You knew it was never a definite thing, but you were confident in the hard work you had put into your job and knew you were a top contender for the spot. You worked longer hours, took on extra tasks, you even worked on the occasional weekend to get your work done. Taking every precaution necessary to prove that you were the best fit for the role.

Everything felt like it was lining up for you. Co-workers were giving you a pat on the back for your work accomplishments, your boss was taking note of everything you were doing, and you overall felt really good about where you stood for the potential position. So imagine your surprise when you attended the big luncheon and your boss announced his undeserving son was getting the spot instead of you.

It was both nepotism and misogyny rolled into one and it made your stomach turn the longer you had thought about it. None of it made any sense and it was far from fair. You knew you were the one more deserving of the position, the whole office knew it. Even your damn boss knew but he chose his damn son over you and it felt like a stab right to your gut.

You felt so betrayed and beside yourself as you finally decided to head home. Tears streamed down your cheeks while you tried to focus on the road but you just couldn’t ignore the facts. How were you going to be able to show up and take orders now from your boss’ son? You knew the job more than he did and it felt like a huge screw you.

On your drive home, you tried to make yourself feel better by putting on some music to distract yourself but nothing helped. You felt beyond defeated and frustrated right now you didn’t know what was going to make you feel better at the moment. It felt like the world was against you. Between finding Justin with another woman and your job, you were really batting one thousand lately and you weren’t sure when you would catch a break.

Things were not going how you planned at all. The thought of just quitting your job and starting all over again crossed your mind but the fear of the unknown kept haunting you. You didn’t know which direction to go in or who to turn to for advice anymore. You were slowly drowning and you needed someone to throw you a goddamn life jacket already.

You were relieved to finally be home. Maybe some peace and quiet would make you feel a little better, you thought to yourself while you kicked your shoes off and turned some music on for yourself. Trying to put the day behind you and focus on the present moment while you got changed into more comfortable clothes to unwind.

You jumped out of your skin when you heard a knock at your door, not expecting anybody to come by right now. Pulling your hair up into a bun, you headed back towards the door and looked through the peephole. To your surprise, you weren’t really surprised at all. You were actually sort of relieved when you opened the door and saw Tom standing there holding a pizza box.

“That better have extra cheese,” you asked with a narrowed expression while you invited him inside with the pizza that he would always bring you even in normal times. 

Placing the box on the kitchen table, Tom opened it with a grin as he showed you the pizza pie with cheese practically oozing from the crusts, “Figured it was an extra toppings sort of day,” he admitted, knowing he really needed the escape from reality. Even if it was just a pizza.

“Tell me about it,” you sighed as you grabbed a piece closest to you as Tom handed you a paper plate. You headed over towards your refrigerator to grab you both a few beers while Tom leaned up against your kitchen counter as he devoured his slice, “I’m guessing you had a bad day judging by your pizza presentation?” knowing there wasn’t really any particular reason he’d be coming over with it today. Unless if he wanted something?

You slowed your pace back from the fridge wondering if he was going to pick up on how you were feeling. You weren’t entirely sure if you wanted him to notice. Whenever you and Tom had a pizza night it was merely to gossip about your lunatic neighbors or watch a game together. You talked about casual things but never really gone into depth or prying into each other’s lives. Why did it feel like suddenly you wanted something different? Would sex change that much in your friendship?

“We can just ignore that...we don’t have to talk about unimportant stuff,” you waved it off. Tom didn’t need to hear about your miserable day. And you didn’t want to pry into his. 

He swallowed the last bite of his slice, “If something makes you upset, it’s not unimportant,” he noted. But when he noticed you just looking at him, he raised his hands in surrender. “Ignore my philosophical ass. But I’d like to hear about your day, you know,” he laughed it off. 

What the hell was he doing? He thought to himself. Don’t let personal shit ruin this. Enjoy her company. That’s it. 

“I didn’t get the promotion,” you told him. You had mentioned to Tom a while ago that your boss was hinting at it but you never went into detail with him about it. You weren’t used to Tom actually wanting to be open or the other way around. And you’d be lying if you said you weren’t slightly surprised Tom even gave a crap about stuff like this. 

Tom frowned at your answer and he felt his heart sink a bit when you told him the truth about your bad day. He didn’t know much about your job but he was sure you were a hard worker. He saw how much you loved your job and how passionate you were about it when it would come up. You would share upcoming projects with him from time to time and he would see the look on your face whenever you explained them to him. So hearing that you were passed by for a promotion was upsetting to him.

“I...shit, Y/N,” he put his pizza down as he walked over towards to give you a hug. Sliding his hands around your waist he pulled you into him as he felt you relax against his chest, “You didn’t deserve that,” he added softly.

You allowed Tom to embrace you, his warmness comforting you a bit before you pulled away and started crying when telling him about your boss’ son getting the job instead of you. Making you laugh by calling him every name in the book, you and Tom finally found a common ground as you kept venting to him.

Tom pulled away slowly, his hand resting at your chin while he licked his lips, “You’re boss sounds like a fucking prick, I hope you know that,” he told you reassuringly. The small smile you formed when he spoke made him want to keep making you feel better, “I’m glad you’re smiling,” he blushed at his confession.

Stretching your mouth wider, you flashed Tom a playful yet overly wide grin to deflect the attention he gave to you. The two of you laughed as Tom pulled away with a loud chuckle, shaking his head at your sudden silliness, “That has to be the most hideous smile. But we’ll work on it,” he told you through his laughter.

You rolled your eyes before going back to your pizza, giving Tom a look as you nudged him, “Not gonna tell me about what happened to you?” you finally asked.

Tom tensed as he tried to brush it off with a simple shrug into his pizza. The thought of his mother’s texts and ridiculous apologies and excuses continued to drive him crazy as he mumbled into his bite, “It’s stupid shit,” he told you as he swallowed the crust he was chewing, “Mom stuff, not important,” he added bluntly.

You could see the look on his face and could tell it was important to him but you didn’t want to force him to talk about it. Tom was never one to bring up his family ever to you and that was the first time you had ever heard him even mention his mother. He never spoke of his father, at least to you, so you just assumed both were out of his life for whatever reason and it was none of your business to ask.

 And Tom refused to admit it but he wanted you to ask about him. Spending hours upon hours at bars, turning his focus always onto the girl; because he knew no girl would ever want to go home with a self righteous, egotistical guy. It was never something Tom minded to do, especially with complete strangers who he would never open up to in a million years. It might have been the recent development he had with you but there was something refreshing he felt around you and as much as it freaked him out, he didn’t seem to mind.

But diving into his mommy issues with you now seemed too much to deal with right now. You were dealing with more than enough problems with your job and your miserable ex-boyfriend, he figured you didn’t need to hear his bitching right now anyway. He came here to get away from those shitty thoughts, not open those wounds further. 

Tom came here for a distraction.

Licking his lips, Tom perked up as he looked at you fervidly, “Wanna have sex?” he asked matter of factly. He figured he didn’t need to beat around the bush since you had your arrangement but maybe he was a bit too direct with his request. Tom cleared his throat as he tried to save the night, “I-I mean, I just figured since we both had shitty days that maybe we could uhm-”

“Thought you’d never ask,” you cut him off with a smirk and you perked up as well, nodding as you smoothed out your hair. Standing back up as you turned your back towards him, removing your shirt in the process, “Let’s go,” you called over your shoulder as you headed towards your room.

“Oh, we’re jumping right in,” Tom mumbled to himself as he practically fell off his chair to follow you into your room, tossing his shirt beside yours as he practically froze already seeing you completely undressed, “Christ…” he breathed out while taking you in. 

You rolled your eyes as you walked over to him, bringing your lips to his now bare shoulder, “You’re really acting like you haven’t seen me like this the other day?” You laughed against his skin while you began to suck a bruise against him, hearing him let out a gasp while your hand snaked into his pants sneakily, “Beginning to really like this whole friends with benefits thing we have,” you laughed as you found Tom’s lips.

Practically growling into your kiss, Tom lifted you up and lowered you onto your back on your bed. His lips traveled from yours, to your stomach, dipping his tongue into your belly button as you moaned quietly before he brought himself down between your thighs. His lips peppering your inner thigh before he got straight to the point because this whole arrangement meant no foreplay. Another plus for Tom.

“Darling, I think you may be the best friend I’ve ever had,” Tom breathed out a laugh as he pressed his tongue flatly against your clit. Sliding two of his fingers into your core while he slowly pumped in and out of you, “This is what got me through my day today,” he told you before he brought his mouth back to your core.

You arched your back while your fingers went towards Tom’s curls. His name began to fall from your lips while he lapped his tongue carefully, letting it slip inside of you as he continued to tease you with his mouth. His fingers sliding into you again, adding a third as he moaned against your center; allowing the vibrations to roll throughout your entire body.

“Mmm, oh, fuck...!” you cried out, yanking gently against Tom’s hair as you felt the coil beginning to burn from inside of you. Biting your lip to stifle another moan, “Fuck...yo-you’re really good at that,” you breathed out with a small laugh which turned into a whimper.

With his head peering up at you, Tom flashed you a cocky smile with a playful wink as he licked your folds teasingly, “Did you seriously doubt my abilities to make you cum with my mouth, Y/N?” he raised his eyebrow while pumping his fingers now tantalizingly slow, “You’re gonna pay for that comment,” he said to you.

“Just...shut up and make me cum, Tom,” you told him through another gasp as you felt his teeth drag teasingly against your already throbbing bud. His lips wrapped around it as he sucked more harshly, doing exactly as you had asked him to do, “Ungh...oh god, okay. Yeah, keep doing that,” you instructed as you began to grind your hips against his mouth.

Tom took it as a challenge and picked up his pace, beginning to flick your clit faster while he continuously sucked on it. His three fingers now entirely coated in your warmth as he felt you clenching around them. His pants feeling tighter from his hard on while he knelt at the end of your bed trying to bring you to where he wanted.

His free hand splayed against your stomach, holding you in place while he felt you trying to squirm around from the way he was making you feel. Rubbing your clit in between his breaths, Tom looked up at you as he licked a solid stripe down your center, “Let out how you’re feeling from today and cum for me, Y/N,” Tom commanded. 

Your eyes shut as you did exactly what Tom had suggested. Completely coming undone from beneath him while you released as much of the tension from earlier as you possibly could but in the most amazing way. Your eyes rolled back into your head while your back arched as Tom’s tongue continued to work you up while you were at your highest point.

Letting out a breathy laugh as you started to come down from it, feeling Tom begin to kiss his way back up your stomach with a smug look, “Don’t give me that look,” you rolled your eyes at his cockiness as his tongue traced along your neck, “I could do what you just did to myself, you know,” you tried to knock him off his high horse a bit while he pretended to be wounded from your words.

“Ah, but you didn’t. Did you?” Tom reminded you as his lips found yours. His hands still in between your thighs as he brought them between you both, showing you his coated fingers while he tasted you off of them, “Tastes like I made you cum because you wanted me to,” his smugness only elevated as he pushed himself off of you as he laid on his back on your bed.

“Need I remind you that you came to my place like a porno with a pizza looking to get laid,” you retaliated as you shifted so you were now hovering over him. Your hands guiding towards his belt buckle to get him out of his restraintive pants. The pleading look on his face made you just as smug, “Sounds like you want me to do just about the same thing, am I right or am I right?” you sang in his ear.

Tom helped you get the rest of his pants and boxers off, feeling himself spring out as he stared back at you with uncertainty, “Did you...just call me a porn star?” he questioned as the two of you let out a laugh.

“You wish, Tommy,” you teased as you ran your tongue down his abs, placing small and open kisses against his stomach as you made your way down to his legs while your hand carefully gripped his hardened length, your thumb running the pre-cum around his tip while you already heard him gasping for you.

Gripping your bedsheets with one hand, Tom reached around to create a makeshift ponytail to hold your hair. Cussing under his breath as he watched your mouth wrap around his tip, swirling your tongue around it while your eyes searched for his. He was really trying to hold it together but you were already driving him crazy.

“Let’s see what you got, Y/N,” Tom challenged you with a heavy breath as he tightened his grip around your hair, “Sometimes, girls think they know exactly what to do but-OH FUCK!” 

His words were lost as soon as your mouth went straight down to his base. Suctioning as hard as you could before coming back up his cock painfully slow. Moaning your name as his chest began to heave, Tom felt his thighs start to quiver from under you. Even just watching the way you were working on him was enough to make him whimper right now.

“Fuck...okay, yeah I take that back,” Tom gasped as his nose crinkled up while his other hand white knuckled the sheets, “God, your mouth is fucking perfect. Why haven’t we done any of this shit before?” he was in such a fucked out haze, he wasn’t even sure if anything he was saying made any sense at all. But he felt his stress from earlier going away finally. Even if this was just a short state of bliss, he was grateful for it anyway.

“You really want me to answer that or would you just prefer me to keep sucking your dick?” you sassed while you kitten licked his tip. You watched from the end of the bed as Tom bucked his hips into your mouth to try and get more contact from your lips but you pulled away from him and just kept licking his tip.

God, you were good, Tom thought to himself.

‘K-keep going,” Tom finally breathed out, flinging his head against the pillow to brace for the impact.

Hollowing your cheeks, you pushed yourself all the way down his cock. Your tongue flicking the base in between as you began to feel him throb inside of your mouth. You could tell he was close so you moaned softly into his cock, watching as Tom shuddered from the sensation you just sent through him.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Tom cried out, moaning your name as he rutted his hips into your mouth. His pupils blacked as he felt the heat rising in his body, “Shit...I’m gonna cum, Y/N,” he warned as you pulled away, running your hand down his shaft as he began to come undone for you.

His warmth spilled out into your hand and down his cock while he let go finally. The stress somewhat leaving his body as it did yours while the euphoric high peaked for him. Your lips crashed against his while his tongue parted your lips to find yours, tangling them together as he moaned against your mouth while riding out his high finally.

You waited for Tom to catch his breath before you smiled against his lips, placing a small peck against them as you pulled away with an even bigger grin, “Yeah, you’re welcome,” you gave him the same arrogant tone he gave to you moments earlier before you pecked his lips again.

After taking some time to get yourselves together mixed with the continuous fooling around underneath the sheets, you and Tom finally decided to get up and end the night. Even though he didn’t want to leave, he knew he probably shouldn’t overstay. Primarily, Tom was adamant about never spending the night at a girl’s place that he slept with. That made things complicated and he didn’t want complicated. But since you and him had rules to not make things messy, he wasn’t sure if that applied to you. For now, he wanted to play it safe so he got himself dressed again.

You pulled on an oversized t-shirt, realizing both of your hair looked a mess. Luckily you were already home and Tom was down the hall so it didn’t really matter. You wanted to say something to Tom, that you were thankful he came by tonight. You were thankful even before sex was on the table. It felt nice to have him as an ally to swing by with a pizza when he didn’t even know you needed that.

“...is it weird to say I’m glad you came by?” you gestured towards your bedroom while you walked with him out into the kitchen where the half eaten pizza was left, “I know we haven’t really made too many rules about it but…” you trailed off with a nervous laugh as you smiled at him awkwardly.

“Like we said, zero weirdness,” Tom reminded you as he padded his way over to you. He grabbed a leftover crust from the box and shoved it in his mouth, clearly starving already from the workout you had just given him. He smiled while he chewed lazily, his mouth still filled with pizza crumbs, “But I’m happy to come by when we have shit days...and make you cum as well,” he smirked deviously. 

The door opened as you smiled back, “Doesn’t have to be just bad days, you know. We could...screw whenever we feel like it,” you told him, hoping that it wasn’t too much.

“Did you just say screw?” he whipped his head towards you with a loud laugh.

“Alright then, I guess I’ll just leave you to the girls who leave you unsatisfied then,” you fought back.

Tom leaned against the door with his mouth gaped open, “They do not...leave me...unsatisfied?” he questioned himself, knowing that that was true, whether he wanted to admit it or not.

“Then why are you here?” you placed a hand on your hip, feeling the smile pulling at your lips while you messed around with him. You certainly weren’t in this mood earlier before Tom came around.

Pressing his lips together, Tom rolled his eye at you, “Fine...we can screw...whenever,” he leaned in closer to you with his eyes big as he mimicked your voice when you said it, “As long as we keep this thing strictly what we intended, you can use me whenever you need, Y/N,” and he meant it.

You didn’t back away when he sealed his words with a soft kiss, paired with his trademark grin. Tom pulled away slowly, taking in the moment as he wished you a goodnight quietly before kissing you against the cheek, “Like I said, best friend I ever had,” he said softly once again.

“Am I interrupting something?” A voice broke from behind the two of you. Both of your eyes widened towards each other as you both simultaneously pivoted your heads towards the staircase where the voice was coming from.

Tom closed his eyes with a groan, pinching the bridge of his nose as he tried to ignore Harrison staring at the two of you with a crooked grin. Making it known to Tom that explaining this was going to be a lot tougher than he had imagined.

Taglist: @osterfield-holland-andcompany @giuls-394 @missmulti @hazmyheart @lauras-collection @iamapersonwholikesunicorns @detroitbydark @mcuassemble @blahhhhhhhaaa @lonikje @beiroviski @ruefulposts @desir-ae @kayla-m1996 @unicorn-princess-1999 @asmilinghopelessromantic @itsjusttor @whatareyouhidingpeter @when-marvellous-things-happen @mannien @lilostif16 @u-rrose @ninjalex1d  @baby-unidorn @astoldbydanid @honey-sea @fallingforfics @lulueliott24 @mikalakat @babebenhardy @coni-martina @captainemrys @mktravelbuggie @underoosmarvel @pluckypete @hollandfanficlove @lookalivefrosty @lightmelikeacigarette @msmarvel-19  @u-rrose @parker-holland-osterfield @thwip-it-real-good @shirukitsune @justanotherusername80 @dangerdolns @jwolfesblog @jjayyc  @ifilosemyselfagain @axisnpalma @londonspidey @just-a-littlebit-of-everything @bookgirlunicorn @kfcyum @thenoddingbunny-blog @buzzbuzzitsmeagainbitch @herondale-snow-carstairs @marvelobsessedteenager @unlimitedd @dramaholic18 @softholand @panicattheeverywherekid @emotionally-unstable23 @quackeroos @unbelievableholland  @holyhumorliteraturelight  @spideyyeet @katiekinzs  @fanficparker @ifntelyinspirit @rubberducky-jrr @xguardgirlx   @selfcarecap @localfangirlx @xxpeachyxo @hazardosterfield @xstarbae @justanotherusername80  @photoshopart15 @spiderbibby @the-fandom-life-forever @jannine00742 @spideysimpossiblegirl @parachutepantswedgie-blog @decadentwastelandtrash @anythingthaticareabout @outshineallthestars @captainamirica @thehauntingofmymind @watermelonsponge @sinisterspidey @adayasgeorgia @obliviatevamps @damnrancidchicken @lolooo22 @cocoamoonmalfoy @spideyspeaches @hollandprkr @peachitofu @quacksonholland @itscaminow @ohtobelovedbyyou @diffind0 @tomhollandsslut @chipot-lol s @marvelouspouges @agustdowney @305weasley @youvebeenlizzed   @spidey-sophie​ @azaraspirit​

[heliads]

Rehearsals (Part One)

Based on this request: “Reader is a witch who is directing the Beacon Hills High School musical. Isaac has a crush on the reader. He wants to get closer to her and figures the best way to do that is to help with something behind the scenes.”

masterlist / part two

You can feel your tension growing with every second that you just sit here and think. There are too many variables in the task ahead of you, too many people with too many options to do wrong by you. It’s very important that you get this right, you just don’t know that you can. It’s strange- you’re literally a witch, with magic flowing through her fingertips whenever you wish it so. You live in a town where werewolves, banshees, and kitsunes are just a part of your regular friend group, yet the thought of having to direct a musical at your high school is enough to completely throw you off of your rhythm.

Lydia Martin, one of your closest friends, grimaces at you in sympathy from across the table. “Already overthinking it?” You sigh. “A little. Okay, a lot. I mean, I love theatre and directing is going to be so much fun, I just know that it’s going to be a lot of work and I’m worried about that. Can you really blame me?” Lydia scoffs. “Y/N, I’ve seen you suspend werewolves in midair with your magic. I think you can handle this.”

You roll your eyes. “There’s a difference between being able to use my magic in times of stress and having to manage a whole bunch of high school theatre kids without any spells whatsoever.” Lydia tilts her head to the side, acknowledging this. “Okay, you’re not wrong. So, what’s the plan? I know you’ve got something in mind.”

You can’t help but let a slow smile cross your face as you think of the months ahead of you. “Actually, I do have a plan. Auditions just happened, and I know a few kids who will be just great in the leading roles. I would love to perform myself, but you know just as well as I do that me and a stage and dozens of people watching me just doesn’t work. So…” You end up talking about the upcoming show with Lydia as you walk to class, going over every detail, even those that you haven’t completely thought through yet.

You do this every year- every time you stress over directing the musical, every year Lydia’s there to reassure you that it will all be fine. Honestly, sometimes you think you should just install her as co-director, from all the advice and talks you have with her. She might know the inner workings of every production better than some of the stage crew, and her opinions on costuming and set design and makeup have come in handy more than a couple of times.

Yes, you’re definitely keeping up with everything musical-related. It’s your job, after all, and to be honest, it’s easier to focus on this than the constant power struggle between supernaturals in Beacon Hills and the hunters. You’re a supernatural yourself- a witch, the same as your family and the rest of your coven. You were Lydia’s friend before you were Scott’s, although the second you heard about his status as a werewolf, you were more than willing to help out. You’ve been using your magic ever since, to take down hunters, save your friends, and basically do whatever you can to make sure that Scott McCall and his pack make it out alive from whatever skirmish they find themselves in, a fate that seems to befall them time and time again.

As you walk inside the school, still talking excitedly with Lydia, you fail to notice the blond boy watching you from the parking lot, the one with a soft smile on his face as he looks at you.

Isaac feels like he’s been knocked out cold. Again. He just can’t help it- every time he goes to school, intending as always to go along with whatever plan Derek’s lined up for him about intimidating Scott and his friends and trying to get Lydia Martin to tell them about the identity of the kanima, he can’t help but get distracted. Isaac’s not thinking about danger from a hunter attack, or anything supernatural at all. No, he can’t stop thinking about one girl in particular- Y/N L/N.

She’s walking with Lydia to class now, actually, smiling earnestly as she talks through something. Judging by what Isaac’s picked up from when he coincidentally sits next to them in class or at lunch, it’s probably about the school’s latest musical, which Y/N happens to be directing. Honestly, Isaac doesn’t think there’s a single thing about Y/N L/N that doesn’t impress him.

He’s been sitting on his feelings for a while now, not sure when or how to tell Y/N how he feels. In truth, Isaac sometimes isn’t sure that he should say anything at all- from what he can tell, Y/N is human, and he’s afraid that by getting any closer to her, he’ll be risking her life in the grand game of pack-hunter rivalries. If he got her killed, Isaac would never forgive himself. He also would never forgive himself if he went all this time without ever talking to her, so there’s that.

At the end of the day, Isaac is about to collect his things and go home when he hears music emanating from the school’s auditorium. Curious, he heads over, peeking his head in the door and walking inside once he sees the source of the commotion. They’re doing a rehearsal for the musical, with all of the different performers running through a particularly difficult number. Y/N sits a few rows from the front, holding a clipboard and occasionally taking notes on what’s working well and what needs to be changed.

All of a sudden, Isaac gets the feeling that this just might be his chance to get closer to Y/N. She’s super involved with the musical, right? If he plays his cards just right, he might be able to use this to bridge the gap between them. So, he heads further down into the auditorium, past the rows of empty seats until he’s sitting at the other end of a row from Y/N. It only takes her a little while to notice that he’s there, and a furrow creases her brow before she gestures absentmindedly at the performers, telling them to take a water break.

Y/N walks over to him now, arms folded across her chest. “What are you doing here?” Isaac shrugs. “I was curious as to what was going on. Should I not be here?” She still looks suspicious. “Not a good enough reason. I know things are going on between Scott’s pack and Derek’s, so if you think I’m going to believe that you’re just here for fun, you’re going to have to try a little harder.” Isaac grimaces. He knows exactly how this looks, he just doesn’t know how to make Y/N realize that he isn’t there on Derek’s orders.

“Maybe I just wanted to see you. I don’t know a whole lot about you, you know.” This appears to be the wrong thing to say- Isaac can practically watch Y/N draw away from him and into herself, as if afraid that he’s going to find out a secret that she very much wants to keep. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m friends with Scott and the others, nothing more.” Isaac holds up his hands defensively. “I’m not implying anything. I just want to be involved in the musical. I figured it would be good for me to have a few hobbies that didn’t involve attacking people with claws and fangs every full moon.”

Y/N regards him suspiciously for a few more seconds, then shrugs and turns away. “Whatever, your funeral. We could use someone on the lighting. If you get bored of it, I won’t be surprised.” Isaac can’t help but grin triumphantly, matching her pace as they had to the lighting booth. “I would never dream of it.” Y/N pulls a copy of the musical’s script from some corner of the auditorium, passing it over to him. Isaac makes sure that their hands touch on the exchange, smile broadening when Y/N looks away as if embarrassed. 

It turns out Isaac’s job with the lighting is really easy- all he has to do is press a few buttons at the start of some of the musical numbers and he’ll be good to go. There’s technically already a lighting guy to handle the more complex stuff, but Y/N says that it’ll be good to have another pair of hands and eyes up in the booth, so he does whatever she says. The rehearsal lasts a few hours after that, until the sun is beginning to sink beneath the horizon and it’s way past time for dinner.

Isaac sees this as yet another chance to come his way, so he casually walks over to Y/N as she’s packing up her bags. “It’s late, you know. What do you say we had to that diner a block or so over and get something to eat?” Y/N hesitates, but not for long. Evidently Isaac’s proven himself worthy during rehearsals. “Alright, but if you try any wolf stuff I’ll stab you with my butter knife.” Isaac laughs. “Consider me warned.” He can’t help but feel lucky.

You don’t know how to feel about all of this. This is wrong, isn’t it? You’ve heard enough from Scott, Lydia, and the others to know better than to trust any member of Derek’s pack. Yet here you are, sitting opposite Isaac Lahey in the old diner, casually eating dinner together as if you’ve been together all your lives. To be honest, it feels surprisingly normal, like this is just another weekend activity with a friend. 

As you sit there, looking over at Isaac from across the table, you can’t help but wonder if he might not have an ulterior motive after all, if he really is just there to get to know you better. You watch the way his eyes light up when he laughs, the dishevelment of his blond curls that makes you want to reach across the table and move it ever so slightly out of his face. If you didn’t know better, you’d say that you were falling for him. You suppose that’s why you don’t hesitate when Isaac asks if you’ll do this again at the next rehearsal, and why your heart does a slow loop in your chest when he looks up at you, beaming, after you say yes.

That’s how it is for the next few weeks- Isaac shows up at rehearsals, even when he doesn’t have to be there for lighting, he walks with you to the diner, you get dinner together. At some point, he stopped having to ask, and the two of you would simply meet up, already knowing what to do without having to put it into words. You’re not sure when you gave him this much free rein over your heart, only that you don’t believe that you will ever get it back.

You’re staying late now, after school on a day when rehearsals are not held. You’re trying to fix the latest lighting display after some accident involving a freshman boy and too much shaking of an already volatile soda can knocked some of the lights sideways, but it’s harder to fix than you’d first thought. You’re standing on your toes now, trying and failing to connect a wire to the last of the lights, when the offending bit of plastic and metal is suddenly lifted from your hands and fastened to the string of bulbs with ease.

When you turn around, Isaac is grinning shamelessly at you. “You didn’t have to do that, you know. I had it covered.” He appears unaffected by this. “I know you did. I was just making sure that you didn’t have to prove it.” Isaac scratches the back of his head, staring up at the tall rows of lights. “How’d you even get them up there in the first place? I know all of this is new, and some of them are so high up that I don’t even know if I could get them with a ladder.”

You hesitate for a second. You know exactly how the lights ended up there, after you snuck back into the school late one night when the security cameras were surreptitiously pointed away from you. You’d been able to use your magic to get them all up, but you can’t exactly tell Isaac that. On second thought, actually, you can- if you didn’t trust him before, you most certainly trust him now.

So, you spread your hands, nodding up at the lights. “This is how.” All of a sudden, the metal supports connecting the lights peel down towards you, moving like a snake despite the previous rigidity of the materials. You let the row of lights hover by your hand for a second, then with a flick of your fingers, direct it back where it had been before. You glance over at Isaac, nervous as to how he’ll respond, but he’s just grinning like a schoolboy seeing a magic trick for the first time. “That’s amazing, Y/N?”

You can’t help but laugh. “Really?” He nods. “Really. Just like you.” Now you feel like you’re one of the lights from before, this time caught under his spell instead of yours. Isaac notices this, taking a step closer to you until you’re only a few inches away. His hand reaches up to cup the side of your face, and then he’s kissing you. There’s a feeling in your chest like a firework, and you kiss him back.

Now Isaac’s sure of it- he really is one of the luckiest werewolves to ever cross this side of Beacon Hills. Maybe even among humans, too. It’s opening night now, time to see what Y/N’s hard work has produced over the past few months. In truth, Isaac’s a little disappointed that it’s time to finally watch the show- he’s been enjoying the rehearsals a lot more than he thought he ever would, probably because it means he can keep sneaking glances at Y/N, the beautiful girl he can now actually call his girlfriend.

Isaac’s proud of the crowd streaming into the auditorium, although he knows that he had a fairly large hand in getting them together as well. He threatened and cajoled, requested and coerced everyone he knew into going. Across the room, Isaac can see Scott, Lydia, and Stiles sitting down together. Erica, Boyle, and Derek are lingering in the back. However, he doesn’t go to any of them, choosing instead to walk up to Y/N and take his seat beside her. Isaac reaches over and takes her hand as the lights dim, squeezing it once. This is her pet project, after all. It’s best to support directors during their times of crisis.

In the end, it turns out that none of them have to worry at all. The musical goes off without a single misstep, the entire thing perfect. Isaac keeps glancing over at Y/N, unable to keep a smile off his face. She has this little look of concentration she gets as she watches the show, as if silently running through a check list of all the hardest moments and places where her actors and actresses could mess up. It’s pretty cute, actually.

They walk back out together, breathing in the cool night air with relief. Isaac meets up with the two packs later, noting with grudging appreciation that Derek isn’t trying to tear anyone’s throat out quite yet. In fact, the usually dour wolf almost looks happy, as if he’s been enjoying himself. Strange. Isaac clears his throat. “So, what did we think?” Despite asking this question to the group, Isaac can’t take his eyes off of Y/N, watching her face light up as all of the friends tell her how much they liked the show. Even Derek says something about how it wasn’t that bad, which for him is a stellar compliment. 

Isaac would not mind staying with Y/N for the entire night, but soon enough one of her friends is calling her over and she’s jogging away after leaving him with a goodbye kiss. Isaac watches her go, then turns back to face the rest of his friends. Lydia’s nodding in solemn acceptance. “You’re good together. I hate to say it, but you are.” Isaac can’t help but laugh. “That’s high praise. I’ll take it.” The pack is starting to filter away into the night, talking quietly about this and that. Isaac watches it all with a smile. They did this together, didn’t they? Y/N and him, together. That’s all he wants.

requested by @thornyrose463​

teen wolf tag list: the star of MY musical @underc0vercryptid​

[script-nef]

Tokyo to France

Category: fluff

1.6k words; Office date [1/6]

Gojou Satoru is many things. The Strongest Jujutsu Sorcerer, an official title which is proven often to be true; humanity's ray of light in the fight against cursed spirits—see the "strongest sorcerer" bit; a teacher at the Tokyo Prefectural Jujutsu Specialty High School even though most, if not all, of the Sorcerers Exclusive don't really approve of him; and a total bother. 

He has an aloof and laid-back aura, indicating he doesn’t really care about much other than his missions and his occupation as a teacher. He’s whimsical and spontaneous, sometimes selfish in the extreme, putting his desires—like his all-too-often snack breaks—first ahead of anything, except for critical situations. And even then he might still not come. Add his total disregard for higher-ups who pretend to see the “bigger picture”, and there’s a lot of reasons why everyone he’s ever met—well, most of everyone since the newest kid Itadori is yet to experience the full "Gojou's shitty antics" ride just yet but it'll come soon, you can tell—are often annoyed by him.

And the one person who experiences this more than anyone is you, who's currently suffering under his relentless chatter after another successful mission. He always does this, like you’re the only person in the world he can talk to (read: bother).

You don't have anything specific against the man, he’s usually a good friend and a welcomed fellow sweets enthusiast, it's just that you're currently behind on your assigned paperwork and he's a great distraction. His tales are often laced with humour and he has a natural knack for storytelling. The fact that Gojou has a nice, soothing voice which beckons for your attention is also a factor. If you didn't have work you'd be fully invested in his recount but as previously discussed, he has shitty antics and one of those is not particularly caring about whether the other person is busy or not. 

He keeps talking and words like “egg tart”, “Shibuya” and “internationally famous” slip through your defence, forcing your brain to block out the lengthy paragraphs on the report and enticing you to listen to him. After a while, you decide that this is getting nowhere. You can’t remember the last couple of paragraphs and Gojou is usually relentless, but you can hear his voice weakening just a bit as you pretend to ignore him. 

Resigning yourself from the work and leaning back onto the chair, you make pseudo-eye contact with him. He seems to brighten up just a bit when you do so, the strength of his voice returning. That makes a ghost of a smile appear on your lips. You'll just have to pull an all-nighter after your dinner with Ken-chan. 

Gojou always has great stories about his trips everywhere, both in Japan and overseas. Having a teleportation skill is incredibly useful, you realise with envy. If only I had his inherited techniques is a thought which pervades your mind often. 

"And I was so close to getting the egg tart but the person in front of me bought the last one! I waited for an hour! For nothing!" The story is topped off with a small pout as he slouches on the chair, chin sitting on the backrest. You laugh, amused at the sudden change of mood. Only he could go from happy and light-hearted to gloomy and dejected in a breath, jokingly or not.

An easy conversation flows between the two of you as you finally disregard your work, chin resting on your palm and eyes crinkling with laughter. 

It’s nice like this. He’s been coming around the office more lately, sometimes armed with sweets and sometimes with an agenda to whisk your time away for his use because he’s bored. It’s mostly fine because a person to talk to is welcomed after a couple of hours by yourself, staring at lit screens until you can feel your eyes die off. You once got a scare because everything had a weird white outline when you finally diverted your eyes from the screen. In a sense, he was keeping your sight safe. He smiled when you said that, replying “Glad I can be of service!” before rattling off another description of a strawberry cheesecake he found in Belgium.

“It must be so nice, being able to teleport places. It takes me so much time just to travel within Japan, honestly such a bother. And I can’t really go overseas either with so many tasks to do with all the cursed spirits running around.” Sighing, you slouch on the desk and bury your face in your arms, missing how Gojou’s lips immediately quirk up.

“I can take you there, you know.” Your head shoots up at that, staring at him with wide eyes. “I can take you anywhere. How about France? We’ll be there in the blink of an eye. We can spend a couple of hours there, eat as many pastries as we want to and just snap right back here. What do you say?” His foot taps on the ground repeatedly, like he’s nervous or agitated. Is he in a hurry or something?

Well, it doesn’t take you long to come to a decision. The offer sounds nice. Really, really nice. 

It’s been a while since you had a break. Not like you can take a long one since cursed spirits are unpredictable in their appearances and need constant attention so that civilian casualties don’t occur. Which means the workflow never stops coming. A trip to pastry country sounds amazing.

“Sure, that sounds good. We need to set up a ti—”

“Gojou-sensei!”

The door slams open, the sound echoing through the hallway and the office. Gojou’s new student, Itadori Yuuji, leans on the door while gasping for breaths. 

“Hey, Yuuji! What’s the rush?” 

“We’re supposed to be training! I was waiting in the room for the past 10 minutes!” A quick glance at the clock indicates 6:40 and you finally notice the sun setting over the mountains. The fading light paints the room in a golden warmth, which makes you wonder why you didn’t notice how fast time was flying. Probably because you were too invested in your conversation with your friend.

Who is now picking himself up from the chair and putting up theatrics by brushing off non-existent dust from his pants. Small giggles escape at his antics. A glance at Itadori tells you he’s close to dying from either dehydration or exhaustion. He must have run all over the campus trying to find Gojou. You wonder why he doesn’t just use his phone. You do live in the fifth technological age and sort of expect a teenager like him to be able to use one.

“Itadori-kun, do you want some water?” Rising out of your seat, you reach for a cup but Gojou’s hand stops it by covering yours. He twists your hand in his and interlaces his fingers with yours.

“No, it’s fine. We’re going to go now. Think about the time and date, okay? Keep in mind the time difference.” He gives the connected hand a slight jiggle as a farewell, skipping out of the room with a bright “Goodnight!” He’s initiating a lot more physical contact recently. Wonder what that’s about.

Itadori watches the scene unfold from the doorway, jaw slack. His eyes follow Gojou but as soon as he’s out of the room, they snap to you. He stares at you so intensely that it looks like his eyes are going to pop out of its sockets pretty soon. You have no idea why he’s staring at you like this and why he’s not following his teacher. It’s like he’s frozen solid in his spot.

Some—read all—of his students sometimes complain about his walking speed, how he purposefully uses his leg length as an advantage and briskly walks on ahead, leaving them in the dust. Some—again, read: all—of your co-workers said the same thing as well. You asked him about it one day and he replied with a great big smile, “I just do it for fun!” He doesn’t do it to you, though. It’s weird because he does it at least once to everyone else you ever met, even your own brother, despite him being only a few centimetres shorter than Gojou. It apparently played a part in his reluctance to partner up with him. Or just generally hang out with him. You wish he’d give Gojou a chance, he’s not that bad once you get to know him. 

Hm, maybe I just don’t have an interesting enough reaction for him. Am I not interesting? Is it a really weird and backhanded way of telling me I’m boring? The train of thoughts takes off, expanding and multiplying until you realise Itadori is still imitating a befuddled statue.

You stare at him. He stares back. He doesn’t break eye contact. This is a really weird thing to think right now but he would absolutely crush everyone at a staring contest. 

“Itadori-kun? Don’t you need to go?” That seems to startle him out of his stupor. 

“Ah, ye—yes! Sorry for interrupting!” Before you can assure him that there was nothing to interrupt, the poor boy stumbles out of the room and also manages to bonk his head on the door and wall no less than twice. Yelps of “I’m okay!” and “Don’t worry!” followed by his running stops you from checking up on him.

“Man, Gojou must really have his hands full taking care of such a clumsy boy. Thank God Fushiguro is a bit more calmer. Now, where and when should we go… Probably should find out the time difference like he said… Oh! Maybe I can invite Shouko and Ken-chan to come along! They need to get out and have a holiday as well. I’m sure Gojou won’t mind if I invite them.”

Masterlist | Next chapter →

[stayevildarling]

Wilhemina Venable x Reader- When the time is right Pt 2

Part 1, Part 3

word count: 3.5k

warnings: brief mention of dizziness and feeling sick, mention of scoliosis, angst + fluff at the end

A/N: Part two! I will write one more part, potentially two, kind of depends. I hope everyone enjoys this story so far!

Taglist:

@lunaticwhittaker , @mrsdeanhoward , @alexajbitar , @in-cordelias-coven , @kenzbro , @loverofallthingssarah , @twistedpoeticjustice , @billiebeanhoward , @minaslittleone , @lilypadscoven , @vintagepaulson , @ninaahs , @whitelotus00 , @httpfiftyshadesofgay

After getting back to your desk and quickly sitting down as it felt like your legs might just give up on you, heart still racing fast and mind filled with thoughts, you try and focus on the tasks ahead again. Your boss instructed you to make arrangements for the new partnership with Kineros Robotics and as you do some research on their website instead of clicking the Company History link or the product one to actually write the article, your thoughts trail off.

As a result, you click on ''Employees'' and you recognize the two men from earlier. One of them is called Jeff Pfister and the other one is called Mutt Nutter and you chuckle at that name. You learn they are heads of the company and then you see HR and there she is Wilhemina. In the photo she seems cold and harsh and not even in your worst nightmares you imagined meeting her would be like it was today.

First of all, you have trouble believing she works and lives in the same city you do now like it must be fate right? You moved and changed jobs and you find yourself in the same city? Your new firm working together with hers? and you running into her after thinking of her earlier while listening to some lyrics in your lunch break?

It all seems too good to be true and it definitely must be the universe sending you both some kind of signal. As you type out some words on your computer, actually trying to get some work done, you feel how shaky you are and that you can't even type properly. Taking a deep breath, you try and remind yourself to say calm and that this feeling will pass and reminding yourself this is just the result from today's events.

As you lean down to get your bag to drink something you see stars and you can feel dizziness approaching, so you slowly make your way to the employee's bathroom, also feeling slightly sick. Standing by the sink, you let some cold water run down your wrists and you also splash some cold water on your face to try and calm yourself down.

Obviously, it would affect you, seeing her again so unexpectedly but you didn't think it would hit you like this and feel like a tornado just rippled through your life. It feels like all this time since Wilhemina walked out of your life, the pain never truly stopped, and even though you had healed since, the scars opened again today.

After a while, you hear the bathroom door open and you hold onto the sink feeling sicker by the second. ''Oh dear Y/N are you okay?'' you hear one of your co-workers ask and rush over to you.

''Yeah I- I think I didn't drink enough'' you say and she offers to take you home but you don't wanna bother her. ''I think I will be fine'' you say and after drinking some water she got for you, you feel less dizzy but still completely exhausted.

''I will talk to Mr. Odell'' she says and before you can protest she is gone. After a few moments, she comes back with your bag and coat and guides you outside the building, and takes you to your car.

''Are you sure you should drive?'' she asks concerned but you reassure her you are fine. ''Thank you'' you say and she leaves with a smile and says ''Just rest and if you need anything just call'' and with that she leaves and you are left, sitting in your car and you let out a deep breath you have been holding in for way too long.

You start your engine, knowing deep down that you are in no state to actually drive and that you probably shouldn't but at the same time you just want to get back into the comfort of your own apartment, as soon as possible and lie down.

The drive doesn't take too long and with the window open, music very quietly playing in the background, and the occasional sips of water, you manage to get home quicker than you initially thought. You drop your bag and coat in the hallway and after shutting the door, you head straight to the bedroom, abandoning all your thoughts and things and practically falling into bed.

The dizziness quickly subceeds as you feel your body now adjusting to the comfort of your mattress, soft pillow, and blanket you managed to wrap loosely around your tired body. Sleep quickly consumes you, your body needing rest after this exhausting day, the thought of the redhead, causing this reaction, abandoned for now but she is here yet again to haunt you in your dreams, moments after falling asleep.

''No no no please don't leave'' you scream, currently caught in a nightmare, another sign your body and brain are still processing today's events. It feels like your personal hell, as you seem to relive the worst moment of your life over and over again and that's Wilhemina walking out of your life just in different scenarios and moments but it hurts in every form of it. Tears stream down your face as you beg her not to go but each time she leaves and it feels like dying every time.

The next morning:

As soon as your eyes snap open after hearing a faint sound coming from the other end of your apartment, you feel exhausted, the last night not providing you with the kind of sleep you needed for your body and mind to fully relax and be ready for another busy and packed day ahead.

Sighing, you rub your eyes and slowly get out of bed, your feet automatically following the source of the noise, that initially woke you up and as you realize it's your phone, you are somewhat glad for the distraction as it pulled you out of several nightmares. As you finally reach your bag, you retrieve your phone and you feel relieved as you realize it's 6:30 am and you didn't miss work. At the same time, your heart skips a beat as you see Mr. Odell's number this early in the morning.

''He-hello?'' you ask slightly dumbfounded why he would be calling you at this time in the morning. ''Ahh Miss Y/L/N I was just checking to see if you feel better'' he starts but you can already feel he is after something as this seems like a small excuse to call you. ''Yes I am, thank you'' you quickly reply, waiting for his actual reason behind calling you this early.

''Listen, the contracts with Kineros Robotics are finished, I need you to go and collect them with Ms. Venable this morning'' he instructs and you can already hear him typing away on his computer. ''Of course'' you reply before he says a few 'Thank yous' and ending the call.

Closing your eyes, you try and take a deep breath and remind yourself that everything will be okay and to keep the raging storm of emotions at bay but somehow the thought of seeing Wilhemina again terrifies you and makes your stomach flip but at the same time there are so many 'What ifs' and unanswered questions, still filling your brain and causing you to overthink.

Still feeling sleepy and also exhausted from the night before, you decide to have a quick shower, before getting ready and adjusting your usual work attire in the mirror, styling your hair, and applying makeup. The only difference today is that no amount of makeup could cover or hide the bags under your eyes and how exhausted you look.

Taking a deep breath and grabbing your things, as well as a coffee, you leave your apartment and head over to Kineros Robotics. Somehow, even though it seemed like on the entire car ride there you didn't even pay attention to anything, the day before you, you somehow did as you find yourself in the familiar parking lot, a while later.

As you walk in, heading straight towards the familiar corridor, walking past the front desk, you don't realize at first, that the entire building is dead quiet, your own thoughts too loud and only as you pass a clock on the wall, you realize it's seven thirty am and probably the reason for the silence and no one there yet.

Part of yourself feels relieved as you hear some clicking on a computer keyboard and without being able to see her yet, you know Wilhemina is already there. You aren't actually that surprised because the redhead used to be the first one in the office every morning, at your old firm where you worked together, always the first to open up and last to close up, really focussed on her work and taking it seriously.

As she hears footsteps approach, Wilhemina looks up confused about who would already be here at this time because she is always the first one and her idiot bosses wouldn't be awake at this time. ''Y/N?'' she asks confused as she sees you enter, stopping whatever she is working on, and for a moment you just look at her unable to say a word.

She scans each one of your features and by your posture and facial expression she knows you are not okay, she used to hold you whenever you weren't feeling well or after a nightmare and she can read you better than anyone else.

''What- what are you doing here this early?'' she asks confused and you can tell she hesitated at first before asking and you notice her voice still sounds dominant but it sounds slightly softer at the same time.

Finally clearing your throat and approaching her desk, ignoring your sweaty palms or heart beating faster, you compose yourself and manage to form a reply.

''I'm here to pick up the files and contracts for Mr. Odell'' you say, still feeling intimidated by her burning gaze. It seems as if she is staring straight into your soul, reading and knowing every single detail about you like the sleepless nights, nightmares, or how she still haunts you every single day.

''Very well'' she replies and nods and she retrieves her cane, gripping hard around the snake handle, before walking over to a cabinet and getting out some folders with the needed documents. As she has to slightly bend down, you notice the same expression on her face, even though you can only see half of it. Wilhemina always hid her pains from you, even back then, she would reassure and promise and pull the most adorable faces, promising she is okay but you knew deep down by the furrow in her eyebrow and how quickly her eyes shut close, whenever she had to move her back the slightest, she was lying.

It takes her moments to gather the needed documents and you find a little smile playing on your lips because despite what happened to the woman you used to know so well, it makes you feel calm that deep down she is still the same organized and hard-working Wilhemina she always had been. It feels like a glimpse of hope, a little ray of sunshine in the middle of a storm.

However, your smile quickly fades as Wilhemina turns around, her gaze lingering on you as she walks towards you. Her expression is stern and cold, no emotion visible and your little glimpse of hope vanishing again. Slowly the realization sinks in that no matter what might have happened, there will be no way to ever get back to how things used to be and this doesn't just cause your throat to go dry, hands shaking uncontrollably again but also for your heart to beat out of your chest, the feeling of anxiety slightly creeping it's ugly way back into your brain.

The woman standing across you, that used to be so much more to you than a stranger, scans your features, noticing the bags under your eyes and the sadness radiating off you. She can look behind the facade, the forced and polite smile but the Wilhemina currently standing in front of you doesn't know how to reach you anymore, as deep down she knows that she lost you long ago and along with you, the only source of light in her life, ever.

Snapping out of it, Wilhemina hands you the files not once averting your gaze and it feels like you might just die from the force her brown observing eyes have on you. As she hands you the files, you reach for it, trying to hide the shaking of your hands but the redhead instantly notices, her gaze finally leaving your eyes.

''Thank you, M-'' you start to say out of a habit, as you were so used to calling her that nickname before but you stop yourself just in time. You give her a polite smile that she doesn't return, her face completely lacking any emotions or giving you any indication on how she is feeling, either about this interaction or seeing you again in general.

Slowly, you turn back around, the same polite smile on your face and a little nod as a form of saying goodbye to her, not expecting to see her again in the near future, as Mr. Odell's assistant would be back tomorrow and you wouldn't be working on this anymore either way. As soon as you turn around and are about to head to the exit, back through the same corridor, your smile fades, face almost crumpling, the pain of seeing the woman you love change into this person completely lacking emotions and reminding you more of a robot than a human, which technically is fitting, considering the company you are currently in and the work they do.

Just as you are about to leave, you suddenly feel a hand reach for your wrist. You flinch momentarily and freeze, as you feel the material of the cold gloves on your skin. Instantly you are reminded of her touch lingering on your skin before when the two of you were still in each other's arms and lives. Her hands had never felt this strange and cold before, as they used to have the sole purpose of making you feel warm and loved, either by holding you or making you feel beautiful in other ways.

Finally, you snap your eyes open as a wave of emotions hit you, part of you wants to cry, part of you is angry about the way she left, heartbroken even being in the same room and just deeply concerned and worried about the redhead standing behind you and holding onto you still as if she was scared if she let go, she would lose you all over again.

''Y/N wait'' Wilhemina whispers and as you turn around, now inches apart, you don't notice the way her voice went soft and she let go of her grip after noticing you flinched a bit at the sensation. The two of you instantly lock eyes and it feels like so much is being said, simply through the locking of your eyes.

Despite the redhead trying to hide her true emotions, internally reminding herself who she is and who she has to be, to keep her perfect and cold appearance intact, she crumbles underneath the bottling up emotions and the way it made her feel to see you again. You notice the inner battle she is fighting, her eyes turning a darker and lighter shape with each thought inside Wilhemina. It feels as if the soft Mina is trying to fight her way out of this darker version, wanting to say so many things to you, but at the same time fighting with everything she has left inside her.

As you stand there frozen, just watching the woman standing across from you, your own emotions take over as tears prickle in your eyes and your heart loudly begins thumping in your chest. You look at the redhead, part of you begging her to speak up, to finally let those bottled up emotions go as you can practically feel them radiating off her. For a split second you have hope, as her mouth parts and you expect something, an explanation, an apology or something that could soothe the many questions and aching in your heart, that started with the day she walked out of your shared apartment.

However, the battle inside Wilhemina is too strong, the darker side having ruled her little kingdom of emotions too long that in result, soft Wilhemina, the woman you used to know and fell in love with, has no chance of winning or voicing herself. You sigh in defeat, as you realize there is no chance to get even a simple explanation out of Wilhemina. ''It's okay'' you mumble, after giving her enough time to speak and realizing that it's too late.

Your ex-girlfriend watches, as you turn your back to her again, this time not stopping in your tracks and this time you being the one to walk out of her workplace and life. She stands there frozen, unable to move for a while as the soft Mina is utterly heartbroken as a small part is still inside fighting somewhere. It takes her several minutes to snap out of her state after hearing her two bosses walk in with silly faces, clearly wanting something from the redhead again and needing her attention. She snaps out of it, turning around and walking towards her desk, the same cold expression on her face as if nothing had happened.

A while later, you sit by your desk after handing your boss the documents and unavoidably handing him the key to your connection to Wilhemina, as from tomorrow on Mr. Odell's assistant will be working on the Kineros Robotics case again, like she was supposed to. You try and focus on the tasks ahead but avert your gaze from your computer, looking out the window and watching as the clouds keep the sun from shining and blessing the city with sunlight. Your mind can't help but wander to Wilhemina and the question what had happened to her in the first place to change into the person you had met again yesterday.

Feeling a little shiver run down your spine, you try and ignore the thoughts, accepting fate and believing that fate always has a plan in the end. ''Maybe we aren't meant to be after all'' you think to yourself, before focussing your attention on your tasks and work for the day again, unaware that in a similar, much more purple office, on the other side of the city Wilhemina is sitting by her desk, her mind occupied by you.

[writing-gifts]

both sides of the viewfinder chp. 1

adult film star!bruno x afab!reader  (they are also gn)

this is 18+ content

summary:  Bruno's interested in you and you're interested in him. It's only a matter of time.

chapter 1 || chapter 2 || chapter 3 || chapter 4

------

A/N: okay so this is gonna be 3 chapters. the last chapter’s smut, but there’s pretty suggestive stuff happening in the 2nd chapter

i did research for this and wanted to try to make it more on the realistic side but there's always the chance that i messed up somewhere, so if you wanna point it out go ahead. it'll be good to know for the future!

------

This wasn't your first time filming for sex work but you felt a little out of your element. The studio that recently hired you was much bigger than what you were used to and considering that you were mainly doing freelance work before, this made everything feel much more professional and serious. Their work had to be highly produced.

"--We aren’t super strict about that, but you should definitely tell me before you go anywhere."

Right now, you were being given a quick tour by one of the people you'd be working with--the Director of Photography. Jocelyn was pretty much your manager and would be giving you most of the orders.

You continue to follow behind her as she continues to show you around. But you couldn't help eyeing the high quality lights and cameras you pass as she talked though. The equipment must have been worth a lot.

Once she has finished showing you around, she leads you back to the set filled with the crew that you passed earlier.

You listen closely as she goes over the details of the film.

"This will be the room where the main scene will take place. Today we will have you operating one of the stationary cameras, but since you’ve done stuff like this before I decided to let you do it without someone breathing down your neck. Just follow my orders."

You like the woman already. "Thank you."

"The shoot will start in--" she checks her watch, "--about an hour. Today is just filming for you but you know you’ll be doubling up as a runner when necessary. We might also have you help with other tasks while you work here too."

You nod to show you understand.

She smiles, "If you have any questions don't be afraid to ask me or any of your co-workers. Try to avoid asking the director though…."

-------

You adjust the headphones on your head as you stand in front of the camera you'd be in charge of today.

Working it should be simple enough since you didn't have to actually move. You just needed to make sure it stayed in focus so they had more options when it came to angles.

About 10 minutes later, the two actors starring today show up dressed in fairly nice clothes that they wouldn't be wearing for too long. One of them seemed quite friendly with everyone. He must be pretty popular you think.

Before you can recede to your thoughts, you recognize him.

Is that Bruno Bucciarati?

You quickly confirm that it is and turn your body away from him and towards the camera, as if doing that would hide you. You weren't necessarily a stan but you did follow him on social media. And perhaps you did subscribe to his OnlyFans. And there's a good chance you paid money for some of his work.

It wasn't your fault that he was one of the few male stars you found attractive!

You shake your head. This was work. Don't get starstruck.

Luckily, it doesn't take you long to get distracted with the camera. You rarely get to operate such expensive equipment like this so you find yourself looking at all it had to offer.

While you neglect socializing with the people you would be working with from now on, someone comes up to you.

"You look so focused."

Your eyes widen from the sudden voice and you pull down your headphones as you look to the side. "Oh sorry--" When you see who it is the rest of your statement dies in your throat.

However, Bruno isn't deterred by your abrupt stop. "You must be the new camera person."

You stare a second too long before nodding.

He holds out a hand and you have to calm your shaking one before reaching out and grabbing his. His hand was really warm.

“Nice to meet you, my name's Bruno Bucciarati."

"I'm ____. I've actually seen some of your work before! You really are as handsome as in the videos."

Even though you're straight-faced, you were regretting what you just said. It was a simple compliment but what if it was too much? His looks did astound you though, there was no denying it. And you really didn't understand how he managed to pull off that haircut.

You smile to ease the tension within yourself and Bruno returns it. Whether it was genuine or out of politeness you didn't know, but it helps you relax.

"Thank you," he says.

“Okay everyone get in your damn places! We’ll be starting soon!”

Your brows raise at the director’s choice of words.

Bruno turns back to you. "Well, let's do our best to get through this."

You nod and watch him walk towards the bed where his co-star is waiting, and the director immediately starts going over what he wants the two of them to do once he’s there.

You decide to do a quick second check on your camera to make sure everything is still working properly before waiting patiently for the director to start.

------

Between some cuts and breaks, filming’s done about 6 hours later. You’d been informed about the typical work time so you weren't surprised. The porn from this studio was highly produced, with a few “amateur” looking works thrown in, so it was the norm. But this was the longest you had worked on one film. So depending on how particular the director was, you would need to be prepared to do at least several hours of filming when behind the camera.

You rub your eyes. It's only 4 pm but you're yearning for your bed. You could only imagine how tired the actors were.

Right after you turn off the camera, Jocelyn calls you over.

"You did well today and looks like you don't need any serious training. Good job!" she praises.

You guessed you passed the new hire "test". That gave you a bit of an energy boost and you can't help the smile on your face.

While you remove the camera from its tripod, you begin to retreat to your mind. And of course, your mind wanders to a certain actor.

Bruno was good at what he did. Really good. And the other actor seemed to genuinely enjoy working with him too. For a second, you wonder what it's like.

You glance up and accidentally make eye contact with a now fully clothed Bruno. The man walks towards you and even though you had watched him just have sex for multiple hours, you feel nervous.

“What’s up?” you ask when he's close enough.

"Nothing. I like to check up on newcomers, but you must have worked in this field for a while since they usually tend to have some hang ups."

"Uh yea. I've been doing stuff like this for awhile. Good work today by the way."

"Same with you. It was long but things went as smoothly as they could."

You nod in agreement and finish folding up the tripod. “They did, but honestly that one position you were in looked super uncomfortable! Is your back okay?”

The man laughs. “I'll be fine. That was pretty tame to be fair.”

“Wow, you must be super fit or flexible then...” You notice your coworkers walking off with equipment and decide its best to end the conversation so you can follow them. "Oh, I need to put away this stuff. Thanks for checking up on me though!"

Bruno smiles at you and you scurry off with the camera and the tripod.

-----

You'd been here a week so far. Each day varied with things to do and you never really knew what you'd exactly be working on until you got to the studio.

For today you had a list of various tasks but the first one was conducting a pre-shoot interview with the actors for the porn being shot in an hour.

You look through the viewfinder at the two men sitting on the couch. You were already recording but the interview hadn't started just yet.

“It’s been awhile since I've done an interview so bear with me...” you mumble while going over the questions in your head.

“No pressure ____,” Bruno says.

The man doesn't seem bothered but Prosciutto, on the other hand, isn’t as laid back.

“You should at least have a list of questions prepared,” the blonde says.

"Yep right here!" You pull out a piece of paper from your pocket. From the list you could tell this collaboration had been long requested by their fans.

“I did my best to remember it but just in case…” You place the paper on a surface out of view.

You readjust the camera on your shoulder before speaking again. “Okay, let's start with names you say.”

You focus the camera on Bruno. You wish you had a tripod, but they were insistent on having you walk around with the damn thing to make it feel more “personal”.

"I’m Bruno Bucciarati."

You then turn the camera to focus on Prosciutto.

"I’m Prosciutto."

“So I know this is the first time you both are working together. How are we feeling?”

Bruno smiles. “I'm feeling pretty good and ready to work. How about you, Prosciutto?”

“Pretty much how I do before any shoot.”

“And what's that?” you ask.

Prosciutto crosses his arms. “Mostly relaxed but looking forward to it of course.”

"That's good. I know it'll be tiring filming and from how highly requested this seems to be, the director's going to want this to be perfect. But I'm hoping you guys still have fun."

"I'm sure we will, but I still don't know why so many people wanted us to work together," Prosciutto says.

Bruno nods. "Agreed. I feel like we’ve rarely interacted until now."

"Well people like seeing attractive people together. And I've actually seen fancams of you two interacting on Twitter. It's pretty entertaining!"

“You search those up?” Bruno asks.

“No, they just show up on my timeline sometimes.”

“...So you're a fan of Bruno then?” You weren't sure why but you sense a bit of judgement coming from Prosciutto.

"A little, but let's move on." You take a peek at the paper. "So who’s receiving and who’s catching?"

You raise a brow at how the question’s phrased.

Bruno looks at Prosciutto. “Don't you think we should let the film speak for itself.”

The blonde hums in agreement. “If they need to know so badly, they can skip ahead.”

“True. I think either way would be fun to watch though,” you say.

“Definitely. You should let me know what you think later.” Bruno says.

You don't mean to smile but it's already happening. "Sure."

“You're real unprofessional flirting with the camera person in the middle of an interview,” Prosciutto chides.

“It's just some banter. Are you jealous?”

Prosciutto tsks at Bruno's statement.

You shake your head deciding not to acknowledge those comments. The editor would have to cut out that bit. The two seemed to get along well enough for work but you had a feeling they would get on each other's nerves if they stayed together too long.

“Okay so this is definitely a good question to ask next. What do you guys like about each other? Either personality or physical wise."

Prosciutto glances at Bruno before speaking. “I can admit that the man has a nice….physique.”

You grin. "You sound like I'm putting a gun to your head."

The man fixes you with a very unamused look but you continue on smiling.

"What about you Bruno?" you ask.

“Well he has an attractive face and body, of course. His stubbornness is enjoyable at times too.”

“Stubbornness?”

Prosciutto seems to have the same question as you because he looks at Bruno for his explanation.

“Yes it's a good trait to have in certain situations.” Bruno returns the blonde’s stare. “It'll also make seeing him unravel much more interesting.”

The two of them are now looking at each other very intently and you feel like you should leave the room. But you need to finish the interview.

“Nice...so this is the last question. Is there anything specific you two are looking forward to?”

Fortunately, the two of them can still hear you and respond.

Bruno hums, “I suppose it's been awhile since I've given a blowjob, so there's that.”

"...And I'm looking forward to receiving one."

You let out a chuckle, “Okay, Prosciutto I see what you're about.” You quickly skim the list of interview questions. "Well looks like that's it! You guys ready to go?”

They both give you their positive answers.

“Then let's get you guys ready for the shoot."

Bruno smiles while Prosciutto's face stays neutral.

After that statement you stop recording.

“Okay, nice job guys!” You look at the clock on the wall. “That went pretty fast. So you can go ahead and head to the set.”

Prosciutto nods and exits the room but Bruno stays behind.

“Are you going to be helping film for the shoot?” he asks.

You gently place the camera down on the table where you left the paper.

“No, I have to go out and buy some things for something being filmed later this week. And then I have to go do some other stuff around the studio…” You laugh, “They really have me running around!”

Bruno looks slightly concerned. “You’d prefer to stay behind the camera the whole time right?”

“Yep but that's okay. I already knew what I was getting into, and I get paid better pretty well for it.” You look back up at the clock. “I’ll definitely be back for the interview after filming though so I should see you then.”

Bruno nods. "Okay, good luck with your errands."

----

By the end of the day, you're exhausted. Your list of tasks wasn't hard, you just ended up moving a lot more than you planned. You even almost forgot to take your break in your hustle.

When you return to your apartment, you eat something and take a quick shower before dressing up for bed. And once you're snuggled up in your covers, you decide to check your Twitter to see if anything interesting has happened.

While scrolling through the random posts retweeted throughout the day, you happen upon a pretty suggestive picture of Bruno in lingerie. He posted it not too long ago.

Nice.

You click on his icon to check his page to see if there’s anything else new, and under his username notice the words follows you.

Your eyes widen and you double check and refresh to make sure you're not seeing things. You go into your notifications and see that he followed you a couple hours ago. You really weren't sure what to do. It would be weird if you messaged him, right?

You take a deep breath and decide to take the chance. Bruno probably got hundreds of messages so it shouldn't be a big deal.

hi, i saw that you followed me. just making sure you didn't make a mistake lol

Before you can overthink it you send the message. After that you go back to his page and like and retweet the lingerie photo, but you still need a distraction so you wouldn't obsess over a possible reply. When you're thinking of getting out of bed, a message from Bruno pops up.

You quickly open it to see the full message.

No mistakes here. I searched you up and saw that you already followed me so I wanted to follow back.

It's not the first time you've been followed by pornstars or coworkers you worked with, but it was honestly still rare. And something about it being Bruno made your heart beat faster. You momentarily think about everything you retweeted in the last hour, before sending a message back.

oh okay, thx! i'll try not to bother you too much, you probably get a lot of messages

A few seconds pass before you get another reply.

Not necessarily. I have DMs off for people I don't follow. I love my fans but they can get...rowdy. Either way, you can message me whenever you want.

Wow, what would you even talk about with Bruno outside of work related things...

oh, that makes sense. well i guess i’ll take you up on the offer ^^

You see the three dots going for a while before another message appears.

I saw you retweeted my picture.

Your heart skips a beat.

oh god, now i feel embarrassed all of a sudden!

No don’t be. I'm glad you like it.

You smile to yourself.

yea, you look really good in lingerie ...you look good in anything tbh or without anything lmao

You feel like you're about to say something really embarrassing if this conversation continues and quickly type up another message before he can respond.

i’m really tired so i’m going to get ready for bed

The three dots disappear for a moment before showing up again.

Shame, I would have liked talking more. But I understand, you looked really exhausted during the post interview.

yea i was but it’s no biggie and we can message later ❤

Okay then, sleep well ____.

good night 😴

You close out of the app after that and honestly, that went way better than you were expecting.

[qyllenhaal]

God’s Face in the Fire || Part 2

Dark!Lee Bodecker x Dark!Reader

Summary: A wife who would do anything to give her husband the world, even if it means getting herself involved with his trouble.

Word Count: 10.3k

Chapter warnings: dark themes!!! contains mentions of murder, non-graphic death scenes, smut (loss of virginity in a flashback scene), manipulation, brief mention of sexual assaults, misogyny, uncomfortable situations. Please heed the warnings!!! 18+ only

A/N: It's been forever since I posted. The last two weeks have left me discombobulated that it was hard to find time to sit down to write and edit this, but I'm glad I got to it! The next part is going to be the last part but I have plans to do one-shots for this universe. I'm going to be posting a Senator!Chris fic tomorrow so stay tuned for that.

Enjoy!

"You remember when I took you out for milkshakes and you spilled yours all over me? You were wearing that exact same color," Lee said pointing at the dress she was pressing.

"All those years ago, and you still remember that?" Y/n wanted to drown in this tender moment she's having with her husband. Hearing him laugh, his stomach shifting, and his eyes wrinkling.

"How could I? Watching you get all flustered and cute really got me goin’. It's when I knew I was gonna marry ya."

The days have been incredibly warm and beautiful since Y/n had done what she did. It was cruel irony that she was enjoying another day while someone’s body was rotting. The softer moments of life were few and far between these days, but right now she’s offered her a wonderful distraction.

She had taken on more tasks than usual to distract herself from the intrusive thoughts she had. She even accepted a last minute invite to help put on an event at the local rental hall with some of the other mothers in town. It gave her an excuse to look nice and show herself off to anyone who had some doubts about Lee. Things were looking good for him, but there was always something to do to further rehabilitate his image. She always looked her best as the sheriff's wife. Keeping up the appearances exhausted her since they have become more frequent for her. However if she wanted the people to fawn over her lovely family, she had to show up. An arts and crafts event for the kids is also a good chance to get their daughter out of the house.

Teenage Y/n did not see herself becoming a housewife so young. It was unsavory to think about being a homemaker for one of the boys’ at school. She surmised that she would’ve stuck by her original plan if she had not been so lonely. All of Y/n's friends left within a year of graduating high school. She didn't have that many friends to begin with, but she thought that at least one would always be there for her. Rose went to college, and Barbara found a man to marry and moved to upstate New York. Only one stayed for some time, Judith, but she eventually left after having a shotgun wedding. It was selfish of her to think that someone would stay just because she got rejected from the only college she had applied to. Other people had lives and Y/n was just not at the center of them.

The absence of her friends made her pregnancy more lonely. Her baby shower consisted of her family, Lee’s sister, and his co-workers and their wives. None of the women seemed to be fond of Y/n. It always plagued her mind to know if they thought she was too young and stupid or if it was just something else

She found solace in some of the other mother's in town. When she began showing up around to volunteer at bake sales and food drives she expected them to look at her face and then down at her belly and reject her. She is younger than them and feared they'd find her naïve. She had kept to herself for so long that she thought they'd write her off as the sheriff's meek wife.

Y/n didn't get a chance to mingle with anyone prior to her marriage and Lee made it harder by insisting in little ways that she stay in the house. No one was at fault that Lee wanted to keep her to himself. It was possible he did it out of insecurity, but Y/n now speculates that it was because he didn’t want to hear or even see what he may have been doing.

One of the ladies who Y/n only knew by her dark hair and distinct, pointy nose joked that Lee had, "finally let Rapunzel out of the castle." When the other mothers joined into laughter, she felt small. It was only a harmless joke that was steeped in the truth. It took her persistence to no longer wanting to feel alone while being pregnant to get the women to warm up to her, and the did.

"I remember spilling the milkshake, but I was too embarrassed to remember anything else about that night," she admitted.

Lee remembers that night very well. He wishes that she didn't end the night so quickly because she ruined a pair of trousers that could easily be replaced. He had only bought them to impress her, but it didn't take much to get her to swoon over him. No other man was giving her the time of day.

"We should go out to that diner Friday night. Now that we have someone to watch the little one, we don't have to stop by your parents to drop her off anymore. I can just scoop you up and we can have a night together," Lee pressed himself into Y/n's backside. She giggled when his hands lightly danced against her ticklish sides.

Lee had also been aware of the slim moments of intimacy with his wife. He was serious about this race but he truly underestimated how much time and effort he'd have to put into this. But people really did love the old mayor. The only slight Lee had against him was his old age and how some believed that if he kept going then he might run into some health problems. The rumors about him becoming more and more forgetful were minute compared to the dark gossip swirling about Lee though. Some of the people in town would probably vote for a paper bag before Lee.

His biggest fear is that he loses the election and drives his wife away. He could lose the race, but if his wife somehow slipped away, taking their baby with her, he’d drink himself into a stupor. Lee tried his very best to hide his insecurities from her. When he worried, she worried too and it made it much harder for him to plan his way out of whatever hole he is in when he has a hysterical wife to deal with. That's why he'd rather not tell her anything.

Lee also wasn't the young man in his prime anymore, he believed that his good looks were fading, and he has gained a considerable amount of weight. The fear of Y/n just up and leaving him for someone younger than him and riding off to the city always plagued him. The birth of their daughter should've assuaged him, but his self-doubt always lingered like a cloud that made him stick to his vices.

"I've really missed ya honey...missed this body of yours."

Y/n flinched when his hands ran down the front of her body, over her stomach and then circling up back to her breast. Her body has changed considerably since giving birth and the hormonal imbalance left her feeling tired, sad, and alone. Her mother told her that all she had to do was look at her child and she'd feel better, but every time she looked at her little girl all she did was worry. Was she a good mom? Why was her daughter crying so much without much working? Was Lee staying at work for long hours to avoid the crying and her? Did he still find her attractive?

They’re both too busy thinking Lee's mayoral bid to realize they felt the exact same way as each other. If there was any other time that proved they were an extension of each other, it was now, but they were too blind to see it.

"Lee y-you're going to be late for work," her voice was weakened by his lips now nipping at her neck.

"Don't give a damn," he whispered against her skin, inhaling her familiar scent, "just wanna feel my wife."

Today, Y/n felt herself slipping back into her normal self and normal life. She melted into Lee, hoping that maybe they could have a moment to themselves, but they were interrupted by the phone ringing downstairs. Every early morning and late night phone call had her on edge. They never seemed to be about anything important but it hasn't failed yet to make her stomach churn.

Lee groaned and pulled away from her. She watched him disappear to go answer the phone.

It has been nearly two days and the only thing on her mind is what happened after she left that brothel. The anxiety made her feel sick. Hours later after it happened, around 2 a.m., she woke up and darted to the toilet. Lee kept asking her if she was pregnant as he held her hair back while her face was in the toilet. She dismissed his claims, knowing full and well that she was just sickened by her actions.

Lee had not mentioned a death or anything related to that brothel, so had he even been found? Was his death even reported? The girls who worked for him were probably too worried about their own arrest than the death of their abusive boss.

She wiped the look of worry off of her face when she heard his heavy footsteps coming back up the stairs.

"Who was it?"

"Your brother," his tone held disgust, "invited us to dinner on Sunday. He asked to speak to you but I told him you were still sleep."

"Lee!"

"I don't want to hear it," his voice boomed, much more dominant and rough than hers, "I ain't having dinner with him and I don't want to hear your mouth about it."

Y/n stayed silent and watched him grab the police hat resting on the dresser. She hated for him to leave on such a sour note, but she wouldn't dare say anything in fear she might make things worse.

He started towards the door of their bedroom before turning back to his wife, "Sandy supposed to stop by Saturday. I don't know why, so don't ask, but she claims she's comin'. Who knows if she'll stick to her word."

It’s like Lee did that on purpose, as some sort of sick payback for her brother calling. Y/n was not fond of Sandy and did not like to be around her for more than ten minutes. Sandy was a nice girl, a bit unsavory at times, but her husband Carl was a stain on her life. There was something about him that reminded her of the men her mother had warned her about when she was a young teenager; a man with a slick tongue and a creepy air around him. However, she found Carl much more sinister than that. The look in Carl's eyes when he looked at her and flashed her that unsettling smile was imprinted into her brain. They did not come around much, but when they did it was always a traumatic experience for Y/n.

Lee left the room before Y/n could respond. He knows how Y/n feels, but he can’t bring himself to care right now. She’s not going to protest against it because she knows better than that. He focused on the sound of soft babbling from his daughter as he walked into her room.

"Hey you," she looked up at him with her big eyes and her widening smile that made his heart swell, "you gonna be good for your mama? You've been on a mean streak lately and I'd hate to make good on my threat and put you in baby jail."

His daughter reached up and tried to grab at his face. Lee was clean-shaven now, but for the first few months of his daughter's life he had enough hair on his face for her to grab a hold of. It was funny to see how she still tried to grab at his non-existent hair, pinching his skin in the process.

"Miss the beard little lady? You're just like your mama," he kissed her forehead and felt a deep sense of guilt that he had to leave her to go to work. But everything he did was for her and if he believes that the long hours are going to pay off. All of his work is going to pay off when he wins that race.

-

The dress her daughter wore was blush to complement her mother's golden one. She looked around at every single building and person they passed as if it was her first time seeing it again. Her sense of wonder always made Y/n adore her even more. Y/n wondered what was going on in the little mind of her and what sense she made of the world.

She was never fussy when they were out, which was good for Y/n, but also good for the rehabilitation of Lee's image. He has such a good daughter and pretty wife, he must be doing something right. Every single person who stopped to say hi or coo at how cute her baby was, Y/n wondered if they have ever said something negative about Lee. Y/n never received weird stares or grimaces that would make her paranoid, but she still felt on edge. She always wanted to be on her best behavior, especially when Lee was not with her.

Y/n was forced to be her normal self; cheerful even though her mind was reeling over two nights ago, her sister-in-law, and what the conversation between Lee and her brother this morning may have sounded like. When one of the toddlers thrusted their drawing her face she feigned an excited smile. She hoped the mother's didn't notice her lackluster attitude.

"Y/n , can I speak with you?"

It was Sally's voice that called to her. She looked at the blonde woman with a bit of panic on her face. She thought that she was going to get chewed out by her, especially since she pulled her far away from the other children, and her daughter who was being held by one of the recently graduated girls.

"Is everything alright Sally?"

"I should be asking you that. Why am I hear things about Mrs. Blackwater sayin' she seen your Lee dumpin' bodies in the river behind her house?" At that moment Y/n could not hear her despite her lips still moving. Her blood ran cold at that last name being mentioned. It's been years, close to a decade, since she thought about that old woman, but the mere mention of her name brought Y/n back to a place she didn't want to be.

"I-I...I don't know what she's talking about-"

"My husband and I made a sizable donation to your husband's campaign, and it would be a shame to see him lose," the sugary voice and fake smile on Sally's face made Y/n's stomach ache. She didn't like how some of these women could be so fake because it always made her question if they really liked her or not. But Sally didn't care what Y/n would respond with, all she cared about was her and her husband's reputation, "you're not that much younger than me so you remember them days when that old bitch would be on her porch spewin’ whatever nonsense she could think if at any girl who walked on her sidewalk. No one likes Mrs. Blackwater, but don't think for a second they won't consider what she has to say about that husband of yours. I've heard too many whispers about him and I don't like it. I'll pull my endorsements if you don't fix this shit."

Was murdering one person not enough to save her husband from losing this race? The brothel owner was one person, someone who would not be missed by many people, but could she do something about Mrs. Blackwater?

'That's not right, that's not right.'

No matter how much she tried to shake that evil idea off, it kept creeping into her mind. Murder was the unlikely tool she had in her arsenal all along. It was morally wrong to kill someone, but her victim and the potential one had not been nice people. Mrs. Blackwater's stain on this Earth paled in comparison to Reed's, but that woman made her blood run much colder than the brothel owner.

It was so ironic that Mr. Blackwater was a beloved man in town because no one could stand his wife. They knew not to cross her path and that pies and home cooked meals would not abate her disdain for people. A man who was so kind and friendly was married to the most antisocial person Y/n has ever come across. But he never wasted a moment to sing her her praises. Y/n remembers one of her sons and he was mean just like his mother; a school yard bully that would beat up on anyone he saw as weak and alone. Y/n was lucky that he knew she had an older brother to protect because the Blackwater’s youngest boy never tried anything with her. However, she was not lucky enough to escape the wrath of Mrs. Blackwater. The irony was that she probably would've been better off being a victim of her son. That woman was nasty and wasn't afraid to show it.

"Don't you two get tired of dressing like whores?"

They had to pass the Blackwater house to get to Rose's house. Her house used to be at the end of the street before it got burned down, leaving the Blackwater house the last one on the street. It was nice, and had a big, big porch that Mrs. Blackwater always sat on for most of the day. She didn't stop at calling them just "whores'' and "wenches" either. Y/n never could understand why they always took the brunt of that woman's anger. Rose went home in tears every time she walked by that house. Maybe Y/n's anger is displaced, but she blames Mrs. Blackwater for why Rose was so eager to leave. There wasn't much here, but Rose always promised she'd stay. But ever since they encountered Mrs. Blackwater's misery, Rose had changed.

She could imagine that same venomous voice saying awful things about her husband, "Lee Bodecker put that body in the water. I saw it with my own two eyes!"

The thought of her husband killing someone shouldn't sound so crazy, especially after being able to do it herself. But her Lee can't be a cold-hearted man who slept with whores, murdered people, and ruined people lives. He was so sweet to her, he wasn't always was, but his touch was so soft against her skin, how could he hurt anyone?

Y/n had just turned 19 when she met Lee. He was a deputy, closer to being the sheriff than either of them knew at the time. Their age difference scared her somewhat; she only gave him a chance so she could distract herself from reminding herself that she should be finishing up the last year of being a college freshman. She had the grades and thought her test scores were satisfactory but she got rejected from Indiana University. Her father told her that there is always next year, but her mother told her she should just figure out a new plan.

It was the uncertainty and loneliness that made her get closer to Lee. He was close to his late 20s, unmarried, and he didn't exactly make his loneliness unknown.

He left a sour taste in her mouth in their very first encounter; pulling her over as an excuse to get her number. She gripped the steering wheel to stop them from shaking so much. She only had her license for a few weeks and made sure to be careful in fear of this exact situation happening. His slick talk didn't make her feel that much better either. She was too shaken up to even look at him in the eye or take in any of his features. She just remembered seeing his badge the words DEPUTY SHERIFF etched into it.

Lee let her off, saying she had a "pretty face" and that he hoped to see her around. She didn't think much about their interaction the days after he pulled her over, but she began to see him more than before. Y/n couldn't remember a time she had seen him prior to that one night and found it odd that his face kept reappearing. (He later told her that it was fate, but it was not. Lee purposefully put himself in her orbit. It was not hard to learn what her routine was and when she went out.)

She was weary about his advances, unsure how to react to them because the most experience she's had was with two boys, only one of whom she kissed. Their first date was not by choice either, he just decided to stick by her side while she was at the local dinner by herself.

And he has always stuck by since then, always hovering around her until she realized he was not going to go away and it’d be futile to ignore him. Lee never gave her the chance to make the decision for herself, but his girl was so sweet and she just needed a few cushy words for her to understand that this was where she belonged.

"Do your parents know you're out here meeting me?" It had only been a matter of time before she learned to be very obedient to him; always accepting his plans, even if it meant sneaking out of the house in the midnight hour. The smirk he wore on his face every time he watched her walk up to him left her feeling enchanted.

"Don't talk too loud. If my brother hears you he'll kill you and have my head."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her front to him. Lee groaned at the feel of her breast against his chest. She was so nervous to do anything with him that she only let him kiss her. It was fine for a while, but he had grown tired of waiting. Tired of being teased by her in those soft, pink dresses that would ride up whenever she had to bend over even just a little bit. He couldn't believe how naive she was to believe he was always dropping things like a pencil or his wallet on accident; he just wanted to see her bend over for him just for a chance to peak at what pretty panties she wore that day.

Getting her to come out with him at night was surprising, but the idea of riding in his patrol car was so alluring. The sparkle in her eyes gave him an overwhelming sense of machismo; enough for him to realize he just needs to take what she wants.

The full moon hung in the clear sky and they had a vast, open field in front of them. He took her just to the edge of the county that was secluded and was his favorite spot to go for some quiet (or getting his dick sucked). The moonlight and a few street lights that were actually working were the only light they had.

"You look so pretty today baby," his hand rested on her thigh the whole entire drive but only now did he actually move it to stroke her skin, "you always look so pretty for me. I'm the luckiest man in town."

Y/n giggled and her face felt like it was burning up. No one had taken the time to compliment her sweetly, and that was obvious to Lee. He cradled her face in the palm of his hand and watched her turn into putty. His hand inches closer to her heat causing her to jump like his hand was made of actual fire.

"Relax baby...just relax for me," Lee planted his face in her neck and nipped at it. His lips tickled the skin on her neck and she did her best to suppress her giggles but they spilled from her lips. Lee smirked against her skin, "there she is. There's my girl."

She let a laugh slip through, but she suppressed the moan that was stuck in her throat. It was so odd to feel him on her neck but it was an unfamiliar feeling that she liked. His hand never left her thigh, in fact he had sneakily moved it closer to her sex. She felt ashamed about the growing wetness that she could feel sticking to her.

Lee grabbed her hand and placed it right over the bulge straining in his pants. She let out a heavy sigh when she realized what it was. "That's how hard you make me. You making me so fucking hard girl," he growled in her ears. This was something only the senior girls from her high school could dream about when they talked about hooking up with their boyfriends. None of them were even half the man Lee was, and here he was: hard and ready just for her.

"L-Lee," her voice broke into bits, her body overheating from Lee taking control, "wait, can we slow down?"

"You taste so sweet baby," he continued kissing her, ignoring her until she was pulling away from his grasp. "What's wrong girl?" The furrowing of his brow made her worry that she pissed him off. Lee was all she had, he convinced her to put away her dream of going to college and stay here for him, if she ran him off then she'd have nothing else.

"I'm just nervous. I’ve never done this before Lee," she hoped her honesty went a long way and would make him take her home instead. But all it did was make him readjust himself in his seat and pull away from her rather coldly.

Lee was irritated with her, she got him all hard, but he did his best to temper his anger. She's lucky that he was on the job all day and didn't have a chance to drink yet or else she'd see the side of him that he purposely hid from her.

"Don't be nervous baby. You know I love you right?" She nodded her head with her wide eyes holding a sad look in them, "good girl. Let me show you something."

Lee patted his lap and Y/n looked at him with apprehension.

"C'mon now," he patted his lap once again, this time with a bit of impatience in his voice.

Y/n awkwardly shifted over the center console of his patrol car and found herself in his lap. His strong arms wrapped around her waist and he rested his chin on her shoulder. She tried to ignore how his bulge poked at her slit through her cotton panties.

"You ever been in a car this nice before?"

"Uh-uh," she shook her head, somewhat distracted by the beautiful interior and his cock poking at her. The only car she's ever drove was the shitty one that was passed down to her. Lee's patrol car doesn't look like it's more than five years old.

Seeing her look in wonder at the dash made him even harder. He began to rut against her, trying to feel as much friction as he could, but it wasn't enough to satiate a man who has been waiting a few months for this.

He sat back and started fumbling with his pants. Y/n heard the sound of the metal on his belt and unzipping of his pants but she froze on top of him instead of moving. She grabbed the steering wheel and held onto it as tight as she did the night he first laid eyes on her. Her alarm rose when Lee lifted her up a little to push her panties to the side.

"Lee what are you doing-"

"Shhh baby don't worry, I got you."

The sensation of his head poking at her slit and her sliding down him was unspeakable. She was uncomfortable with his splitting size, but he didn't move her at all, trying to give her some time to adjust but it was just so hard for him to restrain himself. She was so tight and warm, and definitely untouched by any man. "Fuck," he mumbled warmly in her ear. She felt him wrap his arm tighter around her, almost as if he was afraid she was going to somehow run away from him. Even if she wanted to, she wouldn't know her way back home and she'd be stuck out here. She was safe with Lee even though she found herself feeling more confusion than pleasure.

Those girls from her high school days had to been lying to her, sex didn’t feel all that magical; his patrol car was not a romantic place to lose her virginity. Lee rocked her on his cock slowly as she tried to find the same pleasure that he was experiencing. His heavy breath was on her ear as she stared straight up into the night sky.

"You feel so good. You feel so fucking good baby."

His pleasure is what made her want to stay on top of him like this. She cared for him so much and she just wanted Lee to be proud of her. The "good girl" that continuously spilled from his lips sounded like a hymn she wanted to memorize.

Y/n let Lee have his way with her body. He groped her breast through her dress and then let his hands graze her sides. She wondered what he was doing when his hand slipped into her panties, but the warmth that shot through her made her mind go blank. Lee rubbed at her sensitive bud and she constricted around him. Instead of whimpering, she was now fully moaning; the way it felt so good had put her discomfort into the back of her mind.

"Oh fuck -- move your hips girl. You feel so good."

He rubbed her harder as a reward for swirling her hips against him. She began to bounce on top of him and he no longer had to do the hard work, just lean back and feel her engulfing him in her warmth.

"Lee," she whimpered, unsure of herself, but then she called his name again, "Lee," as if to let him know that he was the one giving her pleasure.

Lee knew he wasn't going to last, not when she was as tight and wet as she was. He can't remember the last time he took someone's virginity, nor when he was this hard. It was clear to him that she had no idea what she was doing by the way she bounced on him without a rhythm. Sometimes she'd stall herself before moving fast again. It didn't irk him, he found it endearing that she was so inexperienced. He was going to have to show her a lot of things and get her to fuck him to his liking.

Y/n gasped when Lee pulled out of her and jerked himself until white liquid was splashing on the back of her panties. She'd have to wash them before her mother saw the stain.

"You did so good baby, taking my cock like a big girl," he placed a sloppy kiss on her cheek, still trying to catch his breath while she shifted on top of him. He put himself away and nudged her towards the empty passenger seat. She was silent the entire time he drove her home. A sense of pride filled her because she had made Lee feel good. The sex itself was too weird to describe as being good, but she liked how she felt inside when he told her she felt good and that she made him cum. That's all she wanted to do was please Lee.

-

Saturday morning proved to be another beautiful day. It seems as if Summer didn't want to leave just yet even though October was near. There wouldn't be many more opportunities for Lee to make his impressions and sway the last few voters not on his side.

The event had been boring at most, but Sally's words really shook her up. No one in town would deny that Mrs. Blackwater has always been a bitter women, but they also wouldn't necessarily turn the other cheek if she starts going around saying that Lee Bodecker is a murder. Y/n's new problem made her forget about the decaying brothel owner. She doesn't care how mean the whole town thought the old woman was, she wanted her gone.

"You slept in. Did I tire you out last night?" Lee had the same smug smirk on his face that has been imprinted on her brains since their early years together.

Y/n nodded even though it wasn't completely truthful. She slept so hard because she's mentally spent and it was finally catching up with her body. Lee had been too distracted to notice how distant she was last night and how she is still distant now. In his eyes, as long as she was eager to lay under him then everything was fine.

Most mornings started like this: Y/n waking up next to her still tired husband and waiting to hear her daughter crying for her. He trudged out of bed and she heard him beat a path down the hall to the bathroom. There was still no sound of her daughter needing her, giving her some time alone. It was nearly silent except for the faint sound of the shower going. She breathed deeply and found herself feeling serene. Just five minutes without the memory of Sally threatening to pull her and her husband's support taunting her.

"Y/n! Do you not hear her crying?" Lee held a stern look on face, he must have been standing there for a few minutes. His towel was wrapped around his waist, stomach hanging over the soft white cotton, "what's wrong with you girl?"

She shook her head, "nothing Lee. I'm just still a lil' tired."

His face softened at her explanation but he nodded his head towards the door so she could take care of their daughter. Y/n hurried not to upset him for the rest of the day.

Their baby was just fussy and hungry. Her little eyes weren’t that red so she hadn’t been crying for long. “You hungry?” Her daughter somewhat understood what her mother was saying because her eyes went wide. The nightgowns Lee had bought Y/n made it much easier for her to pull herself out of them to feed their girl. She could see her daughter calming down, eyes closing once again. Y/n thought about keeping her daughter with her but she needed to rest in her crib. She placed her down gently as not to disturb and wake her again. At least one person in this family deserves peace.

"Back to sleep?" Lee's voice startled her, but the hand on her hip soothed her. Y/n nodded, never taking her eyes away from her girl. "Precious isn't she? So sweet when she's not fussin' about."

"She only fusses because she's teething, and she misses her father."

"Honey, you know why I'm at work longer than usual. It's for her. It's for you. It's for us. Do you know how much better her life, your life, is going to be better after I win that race?"

"But what if you don't win?"

Y/n rarely questions Lee, not even over small things, so he was confused as to why she was questioning him now. Did his wife not believe in him? She worried a lot, but when he first ran for sheriff, she was not this doubtful.

"What are you trying to say?"

"Lee, I didn't say that. It's just that people been talkin' and -"

"And you believe them? So my own wife doesn't think I'm going to win because a few people can’t got some things wrong?”

Y/n flinched as his voice got louder. The brashness of his voice woke their girl up from her attempt to fall into a deep sleep. Instead of waking up and silently looking around, the first thing that came from her was a cry. It served as a way for Y/n to escape Lee's wrath. She pulled her crying daughter into her arms and held her close to her chest. One glance at Lee's face and she knew he was going to deal with her later. But for now he just sighed and walked out of the nursery.

"Aww don't cry honey. It was just your daddy, okay? He's not mad at you sweetheart. Don't cry...don't cry," Y/n's voice cracked and tears slipped down her face. Her pleas were more for herself than they were her daughter.

Lee's hesitance to address the obvious problems he faces in regards to the election made Y/n feel uneasy. All she wanted was for her husband to just outright say he never did those things, but he never did. And if Y/n has resulted to murder, then she knows deep down that he did some of those things that people allege. There were just things that were too loud to drown out. The business when it came to solving a string of murders that happened a few years ago and people talking about him didn't affect him when he was going for re-election. There was no one else that had a strong enough presence to go against him and the folks in town figured that Lee gets enough done as far as crime goes, even though he could do more.

Y/n should be tired of trying to clean up his mess when he was so short with her. However it is not entirely his fault; he does not know. Maybe one day he'll learn and be grateful for what she has done for him.

-

Lee just couldn't stop reminding her that Sandy and Carl were coming over. It's almost as if he knew it got under Y/n's skin and used it against her after she hurt his feelings this morning. He's a sensitive one, even though he hides it well from most people, but her moment of vulnerability wasn't meant to hurt him. Though if their conversation had progressed any further, she might have spilled what she did to the brothel owner. She may want to believe Lee would be proud of her, but she cannot be so sure. It's sickening to assume that someone would be proud of a murder. She quickly began to feel dirty after a few minutes with her own thoughts ever since Lee snapped at her.

"Can you clean up? We're going to be having guests soon."

There were just a few baby toys on the floor but it was best not to make things worse with Lee (even though those toys were going to end up in the same place anyway).

Lee stepped outside as Y/n put their daughter in her high chair. Ever since her birth Lee was mindful not to smoke in the house; it was one of the house rules Y/n proposed that he was surprisingly very accepting of. She had taken away most of the things that he used to destress: alcohol, cigarettes, and candies.

She heard the motor of a car and Lee's muffled voice. She knew it was them, but hoped they were just making a short trip over. It's not like Lee likes Carl, and he's constantly complaining about his trouble making sister. Y/n hates that Sandy uses their daughter as an excuse to come over. She wouldn't mind if Sandy came alone, but she hated Carl around her little girl and she's sure Lee feels the same way.

Y/n's mother had gotten their daughter such a stupid gift when she was born. A baby that's not even half a year old yet didn't need a toy that had a million little pieces they could easily choke on, but of course it was her favorite thing to place with. Lee never cleaned up the mess, it was always Y/n who was doing it. She tried her best to pick everything up before they stepped inside but she heard the front door open. She tensed up, but she only heard the heavy footsteps of one person, and god did she hope it was Lee.

"What you doin' down there?"

Her eyes trailed up and Carl was gazing down at her. Words got caught in her throat and she clutched her hand around one of the toy pieces, the edges of it painfully digging into her palm.

"Did I scare you?"

The smirk on her face made her want to shriek. She noted that he didn't call her "darlin'" like he used to. She can only guess what Lee did to him when he "took him out back" after calling her that for a few years.

"Where's my niece?"

Y/n shot up, not caring about the toys still on the floor. She'll be damned if Carl is alone with her daughter for even a second.

Sandy came in with Lee following behind her. He gave Y/n a look of understanding, he too hoped this was going to be a short visit. The sound of Sandy fawning over her niece overtook the room. Their daughter giggled and babbled at her aunt as if she could understand her.

"Y/n go make us some ice tea."

Usually Lee doesn't command her to do things, unless he was stressed or horny. She knew her was the former by the look on his face. He was aggravated and this visit wasn't going to make him feel any better. As Y/n left the room, Sandy sat down on their couch with their daughter in her arms. Carl sat next to them, making the alarm in Lee rise.

"I got you something honey," she pulled out a little doll from her purse. It looked tattered and Lee wondered where she got it from.

"You know she already has enough dollies," Lee joked. It didn't matter to his girl, it was a new toy, "got anything for your brother?"

Sandy eyes him before pulling out a small bag of candy. She tossed it to him and he caught it, "I knew you'd ask for somethin'"

He opened it and instantly popped a sweet cherry candy into his mouth.

"Y/n's not letting me drink since the girl is so young. This is the only thing I got, even though she's on my ass about that too," Lee knew that Sandy wasn't too interested in the ins-and-outs of his everyday life but he gets tired of complaining to his deputies.

"Yea, I bet," she kept a snide comment about her sister-in-law to herself. The box of cigarettes she had calling her name we're going to have to wait. "How's that mayor race going?"

"It's going."

"Heard that whore house owner croaked," Carl's voice carried to the kitchen and Y/n paused, "found in unusual circumstances...chairs pushed up against the door...poisoned. Reckon one of those girls got tired of him holdin' them down-"

"No smoking in the house," Lee interrupted when he noticed Carl reaching for the pack of cigarettes in his shirt pocket. Carl laughed as if he wanted to challenge Lee, but his hand went back to resting on the back of the couch.

"Wouldn't want this little darlin' smellin' like a bar."

Anytime Carl spoke at or about her daughter, Y/n wanted to vomit. Carl is not nice. She wonders how twisted Sandy might be to marry someone who is awful to women and has no filter.

There was a cloud of fear over her head when Carl was around. She wishes Lee was more apprehensive but Sandy's his little sister, and he cares for her no matter how much those two causes. Things would be different if Y/n had told Lee about that time Carl pressed himself against and put his hand up the skirt of her dress. His threat would forever bounce off her skull and it only got louder when he was near. "Shut you're fucking mouth or else your husbands gonna see his slut wife bending over for another man." She was five months pregnant and had no way to defend herself. He only groped her, but she always wondered if he would've gone further if Sandy hadn't come in looking for the cooking tongs Lee told her to fetch. Sandy knew something had happened, but she said nothing. Y/n's disdain for her only grew from that day on.

Lee redirected the conversation from what Carl had started to something a bit more asinine. He didn't want to talk about something work-related because he didn't need to be stressed out any further. Reed’s death wasn't another blow to his reputation like Lee thought it would. It was going to be another unsolved murder from the way it was looking though. The people assumed one of the girls did it. The place had been emptied out; it surely looked different from when Lee was last in there. Lee was lucky that Reed was extremely disliked, unlike that preacher Roy who died some years ago. More people said "he had it coming" instead of "why isn't the sheriff doing anything?"

He laughed about it though. When he was alone in the car after leaving the crime scene, he laughed. There was no more worrying about the rumor that Sheriff Lee Bodecker beat one of his girls. When Lee did go to that place, he was never forceful. Lee could be mean towards women at times, but he was never violent.

-

If Lee was called in on a Sunday morning, then it was very important. He woke Y/n up at 5 am and kissed her out of her confused state to say goodbye. She only slept for another hour after laying her head down back on the pillow.

This morning felt so different.

The morning she woke up knowing her task was to deal with Reed, she was distracted and jumpy. But she had grown so accustomed to her guilt that it's become a comfortable feeling. Mrs. Blackwater was a more personal score to settle. That woman was throwing dirt on Lee's name, but the turmoil she caused her teenage friend would never leave her mind. Y/n had learned how cruel someone could be without physically hurting you. The boys on school grounds were annoying brats, but that woman had a truly awful mouth.

The Petersons’ daughter was over right after church. She had a wide smile on her face, happy that Mrs. Bodecker was giving her another opportunity to make some money.

"She's been a fairly good mood lately," Y/n handed her daughter off to the shorter teenage girl, "she slept through the night for once, but she's still gonna need a nap. Once she starts fussin' put her in her crib. I should be back before Lee."

Y/n wished her well and the Petersons girl wished Y/n a good time running her errands. It was comical to think of this as an errand, even though today she was going to treat it like one.

She was in Lee's nice car again meaning she was going to have to temporarily get rid of it. Y/n put much more effort into this, her haphazard plan to take out Reed could've gone horribly wrong. She spent her time snooping around town when she was out with one of her mom friends. The plan had been simple: park the car at the crowded grocery just two blocks away from the Blackwater house. The house sat at the end of the street, a bit separated from the other row of houses because of the larger amount of land they owned. It wouldn't be a problem to walk to the house seeing as others in this neighborhood do the same thing.

When her mother had made that dress for her to wear to the Spring Formal, Y/n cried, saying she was going to look like a nurse instead of "the prettiest girl in town" like Jim, the guy who asked her to the dance said. A teenage grievance had somehow come in handy almost a decade later. It was under a long coat that was a bit abnormal for this warm day.

Y/n felt sickly confident. That only thing she worried about was Lee cruising through and seeing his car in the parking lot. But the grocery store offered a great cover. The sun was covered by a thick cloud as she walked away from the grocery store and to the old Blackwater house.

That porch still looked the same. It was old and rickety, squeaking as she stepped on it, she's surprised it didn't give it away some years ago. The rocking chair Mrs. Blackwater sat on while terrorizing people was no longer there. At least her days of scaring off the newer generation of kids were over.

Y/n knocked on the door and waited. She had to knock again, and by the third time she wondered if the old lady did the job for her!

"Who is it?" The voice was much more frail, but it was that voice.

"I'm here to help!" The upturn of her voice at the end made her statement sound more like a question.

The locks on the door began to click and Mrs. Blackwater peered at her.

"You're not the one they always send."

"Oh, she's sick today! I'm just filling in for her today!" After two weeks of watching, Y/n learned what days Mrs. Blackwater's nurse came and went. She came everyday but she was absent on Sundays. It's somewhat astounding that Mrs. Blackwater didn't ask about Y/n turning up on a Sunday.

"Ahh whatever," she dismissed, unlocking the screen door, and wheeling backwards in the wheelchair that she had been relegated to a few years ago.

Y/n didn't know what to expect when she stepped inside, but it wasn't too far off from how her parent's house looked; black and white photos littering the walls and stacks of paper that probably could've been thrown away a decade ago. What is different from her parent's home is that this place is an utter mess. The nurse that usually comes to take care of her could at least tidy it up a bit. With how much she hated everything, Y/n would've assumed she hated mess too, but her home says otherwise. This lady was an absolute hoarder.

"Don't bother me," Mrs. Blackwater sniped at her. She wheeled herself next to the couch and glued her eyes to the black and white television screen.

Y/n doesn't know how many hours Mrs. Blackwater spent sitting there and watching The Andy Griffin Show. She didn't laugh when something funny happened, she just sat there still, sometimes grumbling to herself in reaction to what was happening on screen.

The least Y/n could do was tidy up a bit. It would be a kind gesture to leave her to die in a presentable place.

Mrs. Blackwater is not going to die a violent death. She was awful, but she did not deserve the brutality like someone who has done physical harm did. (If she was just a little bit braver, she would've hacked him to death, but the sight of blood makes her ill). Mrs. Blackwater was up in age, nearing her 90s, and it would be time for her to go soon anyway. Y/n dusted around the TV, one of the last things this old woman may see. All the photos of people on the walls were staring at her as she moved about cleaning the dust from the frames. So many people, many dead but most probably alive. Mrs. Blackwater had children and probably grandchildren but no one came to visit her. Her tongue was sharp, but how could no one come and visit their aging mother?

"Stop moving so damn much. Sit down girl."

The venom was still in her voice. It would never go away, at least not until she dies. This woman didn't appreciate anything and enjoyed being miserable. Y/n listened to her like that scared little teenager she used to be. She sat on the couch, a few feet away from Mrs. Blackwater who had not taken her eyes off the TV or moved at all. Y/n was spending time with a woman who was going to die at her hands today. If she's going to die then at least she's going to die doing what she loves; watching her shows and bitching out the closest person in reach.

She had only moved to grab the newspaper from the table on the other side of her. It was Friday's addition, Y/n could tell from the photo on the cover. She couldn't help but eye the old woman as she read the paper. It has been probably three hours and she hasn't even asked for anything to eat.

"People droppin' like flies in this shit hole."

Y/n's ears perked up, but she didn't say anything, she just let the lady talk.

"Leroy should know better not to do that shit here...especially with that corrupt sheriff around...would've had an easier time gettin' away with it in the city. Everyone in the city already does all that illegal shit so it probably wouldn’t have mattered anyway. Now he’s dead."

Y/n had heard that name before. She remembers vividly Lee chewing someone out on the phone and saying their name with contempt. Leroy, Leroy, Leroy. The name "Bobo" also came up in the conversation a few times. Y/n wanted to be mad at Mrs. Blackwater for referring to her husband as "corrupt" but something nagged at her to keep the conversation going for her sake.

"W-what do you mean?" Her voice cracked but it was ignored by the old woman.

"You must not be from here. Everyone knows that if you get caught up with that fat bastard sheriff you must be doin’ some awful shit. The only reason why he keeps gettin' re-elected is because everyone is scared of him. It doesn't matter how many babies that man has, he's a killer...dragging that man's body and fucking up carnations..."

No one had ever talked to Mrs. Bodecker about her husband like this. Town gossipers had the decency to wait until she left the room to say something about him. But she's not Mrs. Bodecker right now. It does not matter anyway because the old lady doesn't know what she's talking about. She hasn't spent the hours with Lee, with him being sweet and so soft with his daughter. Y/n firmly believes that if Lee did indeed kill someone then it was for a good reason. She knows her husband involves himself in dirty things, but it had to be for a good reason. Lee did not show brutality for no reason; he didn't get his rocks off on hurting innocent people.

"People can change. I'm sure he's a different man now."

"Why!? Because he got a bitch and a bastard? You are too naïve...at least the other girl they send has some more sense in her head. No man is going to want to marry a dumb girl."

An awkward silence surrounded them but it was mostly felt by Y/n. She found herself frozen with a ball of rage and anxiety in her stomach. But she had no time to dwell for much longer though.

"I'm thirsty...go make me something."

Y/n noticed Mrs. Blackwater flinching when she grabbed the remote to turn the volume higher. She either had arthritis or just pain in her hands.

"Okay...do you need to take any pills at this time?"

"My husbands gone and my children don't visit me. You think I care about taking my pills?"

Maybe Mrs. Blackwater would be kind to her if she knew Y/n was going to take her out of her misery. Breaking open the capsules and dumping it in the tea she made for her is going to do the job. She might succumb to a heart attack, or pass peacefully. The only person Y/n felt bad for was the poor nurse who was going to find her dead tomorrow morning.

-

Lee was able to leave his shift earlier than expected. Sundays are very quiet, the only thing he got up to was paperwork at the station. He could go home early to his wife, play with the girl while Y/n makes dinner, and get a nice ride from his wife while their daughter sleeps. Y/n said something about needing him to pick up some chicken stock from the grocery store.

People filled in and out of the grocery store as the sun began to set. A few people spoke to him, never for too long knowing that he's not fond of small talk. But more people being friendly with him was a good sign. Even without his sweet wife next to him, no one shied away from saying hello to the man running for Mayor.

Two boxes of chicken stock should be enough even though his wife sent him for three. The brand she likes isn’t exactly cheap. Lee promptly made his way to the cashier who greeted him with a smile.

"Good evening sheriff!" her voice was sweet and she batted her eyes a few times. Lee offered her a smile, but a small laugh escaped. This girl couldn't be younger than 20 but she fawned over him like a young school girl. Her behavior reminded him of Y/n when she was that age. "Darlene said she saw your car in the parking lot but didn't get a chance to catch Mrs. Bodecker herself."

Lee stopped caring about the items (a few snuck in there for him) being rung up. His brows furrowed and the girl realized that she had said something maybe she shouldn't have.

"My wife was here?"

"That's what Darlene said. Her shift ended right as I was coming in so I wasn't there when it happened...do you still want the chicken stock?"

"Yea yea just ring it up."

Lee's mind was too preoccupied with the weird behavior his wife has been exhibiting for the last several weeks. She often hovered over him when he was on the phone like she was interested in what he was talking about. All the swearing and terms she didn't understand kept her from asking what his loud, and often abrasive, phone conversations were about. But now she was listening a little too hard for his liking.

The only time Y/n was supposed to drive their car is if Lee told her she could or if there was an emergency. A trip to the grocery store did not fall under either of those categories. But it was particularly weird to him that she would go to the store when she told him to go himself. If she had forgotten something, she would have not hesitated to call the station. Something was up with her.

Everything felt normal as he stepped into the house. The smell of what she was cooking hit his nose and the familiar noises of his daughter babbling louder than the Y/n moving around the kitchen. If he had no questions for his wife, then he'd feel all warm inside walking into his home in this current state.

Y/n was talking to their daughter as if she was holding a real conversation with her. Their daughter started squealing when she saw Lee appear in the doorway. He put his index finger to his lips to tell her to quiet herself, but she was only louder.

"I couldn't believe it either! They said the hairdresser purposefully dyed Marie's hair darker," she spoke, thinking her daughter was just squealing because she was talking to her and not because her husband was creeping up behind her.

Hands snaked around her waist and she nearly jumped. "Oh yea? Is that what the town is gossipin' about today?" Lee's familiar voice soothed her and she turned around in his arms. She deftly kissed him and looked up at him.

"Wanna know what else I heard?" He whispered to her. Y/n nodded, a smile spreading on her face as she rested her forehead against his, "heard the sheriff's wife been out and about and driving his nice car."

Y/n's smile fell from her face, but it only made Lee smile wider.

"You wanna tell me what you were doing out?"

"I needed something from the store."

"So my task to pick up the chicken stock after work was for nothing?"

"No...I went to my parents house...didn't want to go empty-handed. You know how my mother gets."

What a sweet little liar.

But she still had the smell of an old house lingering around her so maybe it wasn’t completely a lie. Still, he knew something was up with her.

“How was work?” She quickly tried to change the subject. Lee was not really in the mood to interrogate her, it was Sunday after all. He sat down in the chair next to his daughter's high chair. She started reaching for his hat but he was too far away, so Lee rested his head on the tray and let her have her fun. Y/n was probably going to be mad at him for putting his head where she eats and getting all of his “outside germs” all over it, but he didn’t care.

“I’m tired,” he confessed, a heavy sigh escaping him, “I’m really fucking tired.”

Y/n wishes she could lift more of her husband’s burdens. Killing people who were talking about him did not get rid of the core problem. Sometimes she wishes he never decided to run for mayor. Life was so much more comfortable when he would run unopposed for county sheriff. Instead her husband had a bigger dream. From the very beginning she felt like it was a long shot that this would be successful, but they had gotten so far in changing how most of the people viewed Lee. And even though they felt a way about him, they still respected the sheriff.

“It’s going to be over soon. I promise.”

He truly wanted to believe her, but the sinking feeling that the past was going to catch up with him was not going away.