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#marya b
lobotomy-jpeg · 1 year
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Loving you is the one thing I'm certain I did right.
[id: Digital sketch of Marya Bolokonskaya and Natasha Rostova from Great Comet. They are both in winter coats (Natasha is wearing her white coat with the fur), embracing. A single knitted scarf is wrapped around both of them. They're smiling softly. /end id]
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stromuprisahat · 9 months
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She never walked West Stave alone. With the Dregs at her side, she could stroll by the Menagerie without a glance toward the golden bars on the windows. But tonight, her heart was pounding, and she could hear the roar of blood in her ears as the gilded facade came into view. ... Inej forced herself to look at the Menagerie as she passed. It’s just a place, she told herself. Just another house. How would Kaz see it? Where are the entrances and exits? How do the locks work? Which windows are unbarred? How many guards are posted, and which ones look alert? Just a house full of locks to pick, safes to crack, pigeons to dupe. And she was the predator now, not Heleen in her peacock feathers, not any man who walked these streets. As soon as she was out of sight of the Menagerie, the tight feeling in her chest and throat began to ease. She’d done it. She’d walked alone on West Stave, right in front of the House of Exotics. Whatever was waiting for her in Fjerda, she could face it. A hand hooked around her forearm and yanked her off her feet. Inej regained her balance quickly. She spun on her heel and tried to pull away, but the grip was too strong. “Hello, little lynx.” Inej hissed in a breath and tore her arm free. Tante Heleen. That was what her girls knew to call Heleen Van Houden or risk the back of her hand. To the rest of the Barrel she was the Peacock, though Inej had always thought she looked less like a bird than a preening cat. ... Inej’s vision blurred. Trapped. Trapped. Trapped again. ... Move, her mind screamed, but she couldn’t. Her muscles had locked up; a high whine of terror filled her head. ... Inej stood frozen, shaking. Then she dove into the crowd, eager to disappear. She wanted to break into a run, but she just kept moving steadily, pushing toward the harbor. As she walked, she released the triggers on the sheaths at her forearms, feeling the grips of her daggers slide into her palms. Sankt Petyr, renowned for his bravery, on the right; the slender, bone-handled blade she’d named for Sankta Alina on the left. She recited the names of her other knives, too. Sankta Marya and Sankta Anastasia strapped to her thighs. Sankt Vladimir hidden in her boot, and Sankta Lizabeta snug at her belt, the blade etched in a pattern of roses. Protect me, protect me. She had to believe her Saints saw and understood the things she did to survive. ... The run-in with Tante Heleen had left her shaken, and the heft of the daggers in her hands wasn’t enough to soothe her rattled nerves. She knew she should get used to carrying a pistol, but the weight threw off her balance, and guns could jam or lock in a bad moment. Little lynx. Her blades were reliable. And they made her feel like she’d been born with proper claws.
Six of Crows- Chapter 10 (Leigh Bardugo)
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gayest-classiclit · 1 year
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ROUND 2 SIDE B
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dolokhoded · 1 year
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it astounds me how many people don't know russians are (traditionally) orthodox. like how do you miss that.
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emeraldelysium · 3 months
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anna pavlovna is so funny. she's talking to prince vasily (who has three kids) and goes "why has fate given you two nice children? not anatole, i don't like him" LOL
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thalassous · 2 years
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AND WHAT OF PRINCESS MARY? ★
[ id in break ]
[ ID: A lineless bust-up digital drawing of Marya Bolkonskaya from Natasha, Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812. There is a diagonal divide down the centre of the drawing, where the local colours become highly saturated for approximately two centimetres and then back to local colours. The background is black where the local colours are and white where its oversaturated. There is white text that reads "SO ALONE IN HERE. & I SEE NOTHING." All around Mary, and it turns black as soon as it reaches the oversaturated portion. END ID ]
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seeing gone girl in theaters and reading deathless for the first time within a three month period when I was 17 did something sobad to my brain
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yourgirlsfriday · 1 year
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@mostlydamned​ said  ‘ am i supposed to be scared? ’
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Sorcha pauses, looking up from cleaning her side arm. Marya likes to ask these questions. Sorcha’s still deciding if the younger woman is genuinely curious or simply trying to find the boundaries of Sorcha’s patience. Right now it seems to be an even split between the two possibilities. 
“What exactly do you think you’re meant to be scared of? Presently, I’m the only one near by, and if you mean are you meant to be frightened of me - no. That would be ridiculous, as long as you do your work, and don’t stray from the mission, I have no issue with you, Marya.” 
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malrie · 2 years
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going into the deathless tag on here is like. wht da heck u mean dark academia….. leave that shit outta here!!!! .. cute gfx tho ^_^
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writing-heiress · 4 months
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Claudia Bates
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Name: Claudia Bates
Other Names: Claudi, Mademoiselle Vampire (by Rook), Vampire Squid/Kōmoridako-san (by Floyd), Darling/Dearest (by Priya), Miss Vampire/Vampire Lady (by Comet, Mia, & Grim)
Twisted From: Carmilla from Carmilla
Voiced by: TBA
Japanese: クラウディア・サンギス
Birthday: December 7
Age: ???
Species: Baobhan Sith
Height: 181 cm (201 cm in heels)
Gender: Female (she/her)
Dominant Hand: Ambidextrous
Homeland: Isle of Mists
Family:
Jezebell Bates (mother)
Balor Le Fanu (father)
Unnamed siblings
Marya Bates (younger half-sister)
Mikael Bates (younger half-brother)
Dorm: Terrovania (@terrovaniadorm)
Grade: Junior
Class: 3-B
Club: Debate Club
Best Subject: Ancient Curses
Hobbies: Polyglot, Reading
Pet Peeves: Men Misogyny
Favorite Food: Coffee
Least Favorite Food: Oysters
Talents: Chess, Writing
PERSONALITY
Having such a methodical demeanour, Claudia is very strong willed and composed most of the time. After being announced to be the next heir to the Bates family, she became a lot more manipulative, cunning, and cautious in order to maintain an image that benefits her family as well as herself. Claudia is also known to be a charismatic
Due to growing up under her mother's teachings, Claudia possesses a hatred for most men, not including her father, step-fathers, and half-brother. Men are the main target of Claudia's manipulation as she was taught that most men would destroy each other and then themselves to have just one woman, especially if that that woman knows her own worth.
That being said, Claudia does have a much more tender and softer side to her manipulative nature. She is very loving and affectionate towards her family and Priya, her lover. The same can be said towards the young ladies and some of the male students in Night Raven (like anyone from Sunset Savanna, VIl, Jack, etc).
BACKGROUND
Claudia was born the Bloodstone Clan, a Baobhan sith clan within the Isle of Mists. Her parents are the current countess and one of her grooms, a witch that turned into vampire. During her birthday celebration, Claudia was blessed with intelligence from her mother, passion from her father, nobility from Titania, & valor from Oberon.
Growing up, she had everything she could ever want handed to her on a silver platter. Claudia was heavily favored and spoiled by her mother due to her inheriting many of her father's features.
SKILLS AND MAGIC
Strength: Claudia has super human strength. She has been seen to overpower people and creatures over twice her size with ease.
Flying: Claudia has the ability to fly and has been flying for as long as she could remember.
Magical Abilities: Claudia has been practicing magic since she wa young, being taught by both of her parents as well as some of her mother's lovers. This allowed her to gain an immense control over her magic very young in life.
Intelligence and Charisma: It has been said that Claudia is very intelligent and has impressive levels of charisma. She is rumored to be one of the smartest students in her year as well as the most manipulative.
Shapeshifting: Claudia can transform into various monsters, one of her family's more rare abilities.
Blood Magic: Claudia has this magical ability to use magic revolving around blood.
Undead Magic: Claudia has the ability to use magic revolving around the dead, including resurrection & communicating with the dead.
UNIQUE MAGIC
Claudia's unique magic is called "No Sacrifice Without Blood". The way it works is when Claudia draws her own blood, she can manipulate however she chooses to, casting various kinds of spells. Some known spells she has made with her blood include poisonous blood, explosive blood, and blood that works like an aphrodisiac.
TRIVIA
The name 'Claudia' is of Latin/Roman origins, meaning "lame/enclosure".
Her surname 'Bates' is of Old English descent, meaning "bat".
Claudia is a lesbian and currently in a relationship with Priya.
She is notorious for giving herself poisons to both poison her blood and to strengthened her immunity.
Claudia does drink blood, but has to drink animal blood for most of her life.
There's a rumor that circulating around Night Raven: if you can befriend Priya, then you have instantly earn Claudia's trust.
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hiraethblack22 · 11 months
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Fire and Ice
(Bucky x ofc) series.
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MASTERLIST OF THE SERIES: here.
SUMMARY: Thirteen is a HYDRA pawn, a soldier, a spy and an assassin. A wraith. Chosen because of her powers and transformed into the perfect weapon. (enchanted!reader) What happens when her mission becomes locating and eliminating The Winter Soldier?
IMPORTANT: I won't use Y\n but the lead character will be given a name and will be a fully formed character. Set in a time where everyone is still alive and Bucky is free of the hydra. Warnings: violence, blood, torture, and manipulation. Vulgar language. The story will contain adult content. Probably a whole lot of Smut.
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CHAPTER TWO: US AND THEM.
Peace is an abstract concept made by powerful people to install faith in the institutions of the world that claim to keep crime and danger at bay. In all the years I’d been living, I quickly realised that it was indeed a false concept, a lie, considering that the same people who claimed to protect the world were installing the danger in it. The idea of peace is nothing but a facade that is used to manipulate the masses.
Hydra was claiming to cleanse the world from evil, but how could they pretend to act for world peace when they were responsible of the death of millions? Couldn’t they see the blood tinting their white vest of morality? How could they profess goodness when they were keeping dozens of slaves under their polished boots?
The Avengers were painted as heroes. Flying around to beat up the evil—that, yes, when they weren’t busy fighting among themselves.
There had been a time when I had hoped for them to come and rescue us, me, from Hydra. But, it soon faded; hope was dangerous, it only led to disappointment and despair. Instead, I focused on survival. I had waited, spending days laying facedown on the filthy floor of the cells and weeks silently witnessing the deaths of my cellmates one after the other. The years I had passed, fed with injections of syringes, and pumped up with synthetic drugs to accomplish assignments that were impossible for anybody else, had helped me to give up all hope, not just in the Avengers but also in the rest of the world.
I ingenuously thought they weren't saving us because they were fighting each moment to defend their values, as we fought every day for a cup of water or a bit of sleep, but no; here they were, drinking champagne in fancy dresses, dancing, as the world outside cried their names.
The fair of peace for the future was another clown show created by the government to show the citizens that the future was safe. The secretary of state had delivered a very long sermon on heroes and peace, licking the avengers' arses every two sentences, and delivering sexist remarks about the heroines of the team—that made my fingers tickle the trigger of my rifle more eagerly than I should have—but in between inaugurations and philosophical peace speeches, the secretary of state made sure he got an exclusive on the prostitution trade every single month, and on the remaining days he accepted bribes from Hydra. So, he would end up murdered, one way or another, but killing him wasn't allowed in my future.
I guessed I couldn’t even proclaim myself as a white knight of peace, not when I was currently waiting to bomb the shit out of it.
“I have eyes on the target.” I murmured into the radio, lowering the binoculars to eye the building where the fair was taking place.
My body moved without me telling it what to do. It checked the ammo, fastened a couple of guns to my legs, secured the daggers around the belt, and lowered the rifle behind my back.
"I hope you mean this horrible building," Marya's voice said in reply. The radio cracked with her voice.
The building was indeed quite horrible—a white oval with an awful lot of windows. It was not a safe place, not even with the dozens of security guards standing outside the building. The others had by now removed the guards and placed the explosives.
The orders had been made clear that it had to be set to trap everyone inside, and us inside with them. The roof was the way out. A soldier had infiltrated the rooftop guards to take control of the chopper when the time was right.
I lowered my hand, and as I willed it, a light flared beneath the skin, producing a flame on the palm of my hand. It swirled on itself, hissing like a wild animal. I allowed it to dance around my fingers with a smile. “It will burn down with the lot of them.”
Marya had been with us for what I imagined was a couple of weeks; sharing a wall of bars had quite made us close. It wasn’t friendship; I didn’t even remember what friendship was supposed to feel like, but we were accompanying each other on long missions and on the dark, cold nights at the headquarters—holding my hand in hers like a loving mother and whispering funny stories of her childhood, telling me how her family had always been loving and caring for her and the rest of her siblings. She often cried, remembering them, thinking about what they thought when they remembered her—I cried with her most of the time, thinking about my brother and the life we had lost.
I knotted the rope to my body, crawling down the side of the building in the silent shadows of the night.
As the other soldiers would trap them all inside, and I would be focused on The Winter Soldier.
The programme they implanted in his head was nearly perfect, certainly better than the one in my head; ours was injected with syringes and would fade away after some weeks, leaving us begging for more. I didn't know why these people wanted the soldier, but I was in charge of bringing his body back with me to the base. I wasn't in a position to care about the reason; the only thing I needed was for my brother to be safe.
I nodded to the other soldiers when I crossed the doors. As soon as I was inside, they all disappeared.
The people were all gathered in the big hall on the second floor, watching the performance. And I was going to give them the most beautiful spectacle—the one they were going to pay with their lives to watch. I distantly heard the noise of the bombs going off behind me.
I smirked.
The game was finally on.
The door of the big hall flew open. The people inside began rushing out, scarfs and clothes over their mouths, to block the smoke from entering their lungs.
I rolled my eyes—people really didn’t know how to save themselves. Running straight into the arms of danger.
I grabbed my rifle and fired shots against the walls. They all dropped in an instant, moving out of the way, and clearing the way for us.
He was in the back of the room. Beautifully swinging punches and kicks at the soldiers surrounding him, ducking out of the flashes of knives. I walked to him, taking my sweet time to extract my favourite dagger from the belt.
The soldiers didn’t waste any time, shooting and punching their way to the Avengers. I recognised a couple of them—I saw the widow jump straight for one of us, leaving him at her feet an instant later. The Captain was, as usual, throwing his shield at the enemies and shouting orders. An arrow flashed past me, grazing my cheek, but I paid no mind; somebody else would take care of that. I saw out of the corner of my eye the soldiers shooting in the direction of the Hawke without breaking the protective circle they had me in—if I didn’t grab a hold of the Winter Soldier, none of us would go unpunished. And then, finally, I saw him
One of the soldiers, S-32 was his number, was attacking too roughly, advancing too closely. He swung a powerful punch at the Winter Soldier, making his head shoot sideways. I saw his blood spraying the floor. Another soldier came, locking his arms behind him. S-32 raised a knife, arching down straight for the Winter Soldier’s throat. The knife flashed closer and closer and brushed the skin of his neck before it stopped.
S-32 stared at me in shock, his eyes wide. His mouth opened, but only a pained groan escaped his trembling lips. He shot his eyes where my hand was closed around his wrist, my skin glowing and his flesh fuming away through my fingers.
“He is mine.”
I kicked him in the chest, watching his body tumble to the ground amid the fight.
I nodded to the other to release him, and his hands couldn’t have dropped faster.
I stared at the Winter Soldier, bending my head to the side to study him better. He was panting in pain, but I couldn't feel any remorse. The power coursing through my veins was too intoxicating to resist. The first thing I noticed were his blue and intense eyes. They reminded me of the ocean, but with a dangerous edge that made me shiver.
I threw another knife from my holster, imbedding it on the floor between the Winter Soldier's feet. He stared at it, then at me.
I winked. "I'd hate for this to be boring."
The Winter Soldier's eyes narrowed, sizing me up and trying to figure out if it was a scam or not. I took a step forward, keeping my eyes locked on his.
"You know," I said, "I've heard a lot about you. The things you've done... they're pretty impressive." He didn't react, remaining frozen in the little bubble that had formed around us. I saw a flicker of something in his eyes. Recognition? Regret? It was hard to tell.
"I don't do that anymore."
"It's cute you think you can escape this," I mocked him.
I quickly turned around to face him, my heart racing as I braced myself for his next move. He lunged at me with the knife. I bent sideways, avoiding that flash of silver.
I didn't wait any longer and lashed out in attack. As I lunged forward, I felt a rush of adrenaline. My foot collided with his stomach, making him stumble backward. He doubled over, escaping from my attack like intangible smoke. He rolled out of the way, rising on his feet behind me, knife in hand and ready.
"Let's dance, doll."
In a flash, the Winter Soldier was on his feet, behind my back, immobilising my arms against my torso with his metal arm. He pressed me against his hard chest. The knife angled beneath my chin, and his breath caressed my ear as he bent down and whispered, "It's cute you think you can beat me."
I took a step back, my eyes locked on his, searching for any sign of weakness. He was quick and agile. Hydra had definitely wasted their time training this man, but they had done it with me too. With a sudden burst of energy, he charged at me again, his knife glinting in the light. I sidestepped his attack and landed a swift kick to his side. He stumbled backward.
The Winter soldier grabbed his side, slightly hunched on his side. I dove forward, sending my knife to slice the air towards his forehead. But the bastard grabbed my wrist, like I had done with S-32 minutes prior. His metal hand crushed it so hard that I felt my bones' wishes to snap. He twisted my wrist until my fingers spasmed open, and the blade clattered awkwardly to the floor. If any of my trainers had been watching, they would have whipped me into unconsciousness.
There was something in his voice that made my blood roar violently in my veins. I involuntarily licked my lips.
"If you're done flirting with me, soldat,” I hardly recognised my own voice, and that mocking smile that could be heard in it. “I'd like to kill you now."
I concentrated on my back, making the skin flare up with fire. He hissed. At first, he tried to hold on to me, but he stumbled back, surrendering to the pain. The knife fell, and I kicked it to let it disappear in the crowd.
As soon as there was space between us, I elbowed him in the groin. I laughed as he groaned in pain, finally rolling away, free from his hold.
With a quick movement, he lunged at me again, his metal arm glinting in the dim light. I dodged his attack and countered with a swift kick to his side. He grunted in pain but didn't back down.
We continued to exchange blows, each one more powerful than the last. As the fight dragged on, I could feel my energy waning, but I refused to give up.
The winter soldier's punch came straight for my mouth. The hit almost knocked me to the ground, but I managed to stay on my feet. I could feel the blood trickling down from my lip. The winter soldier smirked at me, his intense eyes now filled with a hint of amusement.
I knew that this fight was far from over.
I wiped the blood off with the back of my hand. My lips curled in a small smirk of their own.
"I hoped I didn't have to use this," I told him, showing him my hand, the fire rolling on my fingers, "Hydra won't be happy if I burn you to fucking ashes, but hey!" I shot a wave of fire, making it more solid than hot, sending him backward. I shrugged. "Accidents do happen."
I knocked him down twice, sending him further and further into the back of the room, right where I saw Marya keeping the door open for me. She was leaning against the door, using a small knife to clean the underside of her nails, unbothered by the chaos and destruction that was going on around us.
The Winter Soldier stumbled on his feet again, and finally, sending a last blast of power against his chest, he stumbled out of the room.
I nodded to Marya, and she moved to grab her two guns, diving into the room and locking the door behind her.
I took my rifle from my back, and pointed it straight for his heart. “It’s just you and me now, soldat.”
“You don’t have to do this,” he spoke, holding up his hands to show submission.
“Don’t I?” I asked, my voice rougher than I intended. “Are you going to appeal to my sense of pity? Because I have none.”
None I could feel; not at the moment. Not when whatever they shot in my veins was making my heart hammer so loud in my ears that my head felt like it was about to explode; not when I knew what would happen to me and the others if I failed.
“I can help you.”
His eyes were kind, almost sweet, but it was pointless. I didn't know how long I could resist the urge to give in to the voice screaming at me to complete my mission.
“Help me?” I laughed bitterly. “It is a bit late for that.”
I pressed my finger on the trigger. I didn’t know why I was entertaining his idiotic desire to speak with me. I didn’t know why I yet had to shoot a bullet in his heart—heart, not head—because, for whatever reason, my orders prevented me from performing my regular schedule.
“I know they control your mind. I can help you get out of their control. Let me help you. I have connections," he said, "people who can protect you and your loved ones.”
I shook my head.
I opened my mouth to speak again, to scream at him to shut up, to stop messing with my time.
“Nobody can save us,” I said. I heard the sound of the chopper igniting and taking off and the noise of screaming in the distance. The sinister whispers of the serum in my ears and the roaring of the fire.
“The building is on fire. You will die one way," I raised my rifle to aim at his heart, "or the other. Goodbye, soldat. Hydra sends its regards.”
Then everything exploded.
I felt my body flying, smashing against the wall. Then everything turned black.
“Thirt-” a voice broke the surface of the fog clouding my mind. “Thirteen…are you—”
My throat felt like sandpaper, it was aching, and it burned. I brought a hand to my head, as if to find out if I could feel something other than the loud ringing in my ears.
The hand came away stained with blood. I coughed, groaning in pain.
I couldn't understand where I was, couldn't understand why I was in pain. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut, making the tears that had been stuck in my eyes fall, and tried to bring my surroundings into focus.
Everything was tinted in red, smoke was filling the room. The flames were slowly consuming the area around me, but my powers had squeezed me into the familiar protective shield, allowing me to breathe. The fire would not burn me, would not kill me—the scientists had tested it in any way they could think; they burned every part of my body, shoved burning iron on my body, in my eyes, in my throat, but nothing; the smoke would kill me, with time, and those damn powers didn't even give me the joy of an unexpected death.
My throat felt like sandpaper; it was aching, and it burned.
I lifted myself onto my knees, bracing myself with my hands when the world wobbled violently.
The screams in the distance were now drowned out by the crackling of the fire. I knew I had to get out of there, but my mind was still reeling from what had just happened. The sinister whispers of the serum echoed in my head, getting quieter and quieter. And for the first time since I had woken up, my head wasn’t heavy and my mind wasn’t blank.
"What the fuck is going on?"
For the first time in years, I was out of the base, and I didn't feel the black mask of the drug pushing me down. There was no constant pain that clutched my heart and mind, no voice in my head making me do things I hated. The world around me seemed brighter and more vibrant than ever, as if I were seeing it for the first time.
Tears rolled out of my eyes. I stared at the door, and I gathered myself to run out of it. Maybe I'd reach those mountains I had seen on the mission to Norway a few years back. I could finally escape and hide. I would be free. Free.
But then I saw him—the sergeant, the soldat, the Winter Soldier slumped on the ground, eyes closed and still as a corpse.
And I remembered the mission. The headquarters. The other soldiers. The fucking microchip they had implanted in my body, prevented me, even in my clearest moments, from escaping.
The rifle was lying somewhere in the room, but retrieving it was the least of my thoughts. I remembered all those words the scientists had shouted in my face, as they beat, whipped, and carved my body according to their pleasure. Michael. Michael would die if I disappeared like that.
I sobbed, mourning for the life I didn't get to live, for the things I wasn't allowed to feel. I took a deep breath and wiped away my tears. I couldn't let my emotions consume me, not now. Michael would be safe, and I would need to sacrifice my life for him. It was a small price to pay for the life of my only family. I had to get up and go back, no matter how hard it was.
But I had a choice to change things. To make them better.
I crawled to the soldier as blood began to trickle from my nose. I groaned with pain as I rolled him onto his back, placing my fingers on his neck. He was alive.
His words echoed in my head.
I can help you. I can help you.
I eyed the exit; it was engulfed in fire, and an escape through the windows was unlikely. "Soldat." I shook him from his shoulders roughly, but nothing. "Soldat. Wake up! Come on."
His eyes stayed closed. Shit.
I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down. I had to think fast.
"Thirteen! Thirteen! Report now." I nearly ripped my belt off in my haste to grab the radio. Marya's voice came through, screaming at me to inform her whether the mission had been successful. "Is the target dead?" I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down.
And I could make no other decision.
My heart was pounding as I took a deep breath and replied, "Affirmative, target eliminated."
"Meet us at the rendezvous point in ten minutes.”
I knew what her words actually meant, if I was not there in time, a squad would track down my microchip—whatever that thing was—and execute me for desertion. Mission accomplished or not. I had to move fast.
"Copy that."
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I took another moment to stare at the man before me, looking so peaceful despite everything. He was strong enough to have survived that long in the smoke, in that moment, I had to be strong and pull us both out of this hell. "I hope you're worth it."
I wrapped my arms around the soldier and began to pull, nearly screaming from the pain in my muscles, but I had no time to find an alternative. I couldn't do anything else.
"Damn it, you're heavy." I yanked him with me, stretching the shield around both of us. “If we both die because you want to pull a Sleeping Beauty on me, my ghost will torture yours for eternity.”
The crossing was excruciating.
I dragged him through the big chamber, and then, kicking open the doors, I hauled him up the fire escape to the roof.
I collapsed on the floor beside him, desperately gasping for air. The soldier was still unconscious and unmoving, but he was breathing, and his pulse was steady. And that was enough. Enough to hope.
I lifted the sleeve of his jacket, exposing his arm. And being the only thing at my disposal, I began to write on his arm with my blood.
"You said you could help us." I gave him one last look. "Please do it."
I jumped down the stairs again, submerging into the fire and disappearing.
For the first time in years, the familiar bite of hope came back to haunt me, I only hoped not to be absolutely devastated by the consequences of my actions.
Please, Let me know what you think and if you would like to be tagged in later parts!
Disclaimer: all of my chapters will have a title with the name of a song. This chapter has the title 'Us and them', a song by Pink Floyd. It has no correlation with the story, but I thought it was nice to let you all know.
@mori1b2bpad @lady-bellyn  @thefandomplace @bonkyandsteebluver @billihill - let me know if you still wish to be tagged to the next parts or deleted from the tag list.
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mynameisemma · 6 months
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I've been brainrotting about Sonya again (very shocking I know) and I decided to write down my thoughts to get rid of the worms in my head.
I think after 4+ years of hyperfixation I'm able to articulate my feelings on Sonya's ending better. I used to think what I felt was pity for her but now I understand it's actually frustration. I'm not mad Sonya didn't marry Nikolai (and given his occasional emotional coldness with the supposed "love of his life" I don't even want to know how he'd treat the woman he never really loved or appreciated) or Dolokhov or anyone. It's the fact that her mistreatment and emotional abuse by the Rostovs (which isn't even subtext you know; it's explicitly said that Sonya's obsession with sacrifices as the way to show her personal worth stems from her position in the Rostovs' household) given no sympathy narratively that makes me mad; it's the fact that Sonya is constantly compared to a pet animal (domestic cat) that makes me mad; it's the fact that Natasha calls her a sterile flower, a useless person in fact, and refuses her the right to feel things as deep and intense as Natasha herself or Marya would, despite the significant role Sonya played in paving these women's road to happiness, that makes me mad.
Yes, I'm aware Sonya's journey in the novel has its own messages and intentions but in my opinion they come across as this typical "if you're homeless just buy a house UwU" privileged view because a) the narrative, again, refuses to treat the fact how much Sonya's background of living in dependency on the people that have been neglecting her for the most part of her life shapes and maims her personality with any nuance and care (unlike Marya's story of abuse was treated) b) the things the narrative "accuses" and "punishes" her for are extremely dumb and hypocritical.
Like how the narrative implies that she's incapable of feeling emotions (or "poetic feelings" if you will) but earlier in the novel we see her overwhelmed with joy, happiness and even pride and it happens when Sonya doesn't think obsessively about the ways to show her gratitude to the Rostovs or actually receives some recognition from the person she loves. How shocking! (no, it's not).
Or how Natasha says Sonya lacks selfishness but the only time she is selfish and hurt and bitter she's punished for not being able to make genuine sacrifice and still hoping/wanting to be with the person she loves.
And what makes me want to rip my hair off is how Sonya strived for the whole novel to be recognised and seen, her character, her very core is about love, her story is about unrequited love. It's not knocking at the close door but throwing yourself against the wall — here I am, please, see me, notice me, I love you, I love you, I love you, I'm worthy of your love — and it's not her failure to win the love of the people she loves that is tragic and infuriating (Sonya refuses to accept this simple and yet painful truth that you can never be "enough" for people that don't love you, little does she know about unconditional love) but the way her silent misery is swept under the rug in-between this family utopia Tolstoy tries to create.
Because we aren't supposed to think too much about domestic cat's thoughts or feelings
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Hook siblings body swap✨
Because I'm here for the chaos.
So, they fucked around and found out with Yzma's potions, daring eachother to drink it. Which means that none can back out now, obviously.
And if the potions worked as they were supposed to, well, that's anyone's guess.
Either way, they drink, stuff happens, and ta-da body swap!
No one saw this because obviously they broke in after opening hours, what else did you expect.
Now, Harriet finds herself in CJ's body and bolts immediately, because CJ has virtually zero responsibilities and Harriet wants a vacation, goddammit.
She also probably gets CJ's body halfway to alcohol poisoning within thirty minutes. Only took her that long because not a lot of people are willing to give alcohol to thirteen yo CJ Hook who a) doesn't drink and b) has two older siblings who will flip out of anyone messes with her.
Of course, Ginny Gothel isn't scared of that. She gets Harriet-as-CJ alcohol without second thought. Harriet almost starts flirting with her, which would be kinda awkward, so she just bolts again and no one is surprised, because that's CJ man, what did you expect.
Harriet-as-CJ could just get away with absolutely anything.
Especially as her siblings are not having a good time and won't tell her no. They wanna live, you see.
Harry is very much not having a good time.
He got stranded in Harriet's body. Which is not a fun experience. Bitch has no regards for her personal safety and is a functioning alcoholic, so.
Anyway, first words aftee figuring out what happened and seeing Harriet run away are „Wait Harriet no, come back, I'm not dealing with your disaster threesome!“
Spoiler alert: he does end up dealing with her disaster threesome. And with her ship & crew.
Now, he knows how to run a ship. How could he not. He'd just rather not.
And he needs to invest a significant amount of energy into not flirting with Uma, which, you know. That would be kinda awkward.
(It doesn't work. He's incapable of turning it off. But everyone just brushes everything off as Hook siblings crazy and maybe jealousy.)
CJ is also not having good time. She ended up in Harry's body and immediately got dragged back at Revenge by Uma.
...Yeah, between all three of them, there is a fair amount of „fuck, help, my sibling's partner(s) are flirting with me, what do I do?!“
CJ tries to avoid being alone with Uma as much as she can.
She gets asked some variation of „Are you okay?“ at least three times within the first hour because she doesn't, you know, obey Uma's orders before she even says them.
On the brighter side, CJ discovered that she can get away with arson in port like this.
(Her older siblings are busy and Uma won't actually tell off Harry - the person who everyone thinks is Harry.)
So, yeah.
And almost no one catches on because are you really gonna question Hook siblings chaos? Are you?
But of course, they still act off enough to warrant an exorcism or two. (Freddie Facilier and Claudine Frollo, at two separate times.)
Marya Rasputin might or might not have tried to disect someone.
The siblings couldn't care less.
And the Hearts keep referring to the Hooks by the correct names (wrong names for the bodies), but, again, no one questions that. The general sentiment is along the lines of „Okay, I don't know why the Hearts triplets just greeted CJ Hook as Harriet, and I don't wanna know! They have swords!“
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officialleotolstoy · 6 days
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1, 18 and 21. Burn the wap fandom alive baby
1. The character everyone gets wrong:
I already talked about Pierre in my other answer, so I’m going to go with a weird pair of characters: Marya B and Anatole. With Marya B, people love to just turn her into a soft girl cottagecore lesbian stereotype character and ignore all of the nuance she has. She helped essentially run the estate when her father was dying and whipped everyone into shape when no one else stepped up. She basically raised Nikolushka for her absent brother. She was relieved her father was dying and felt horribly guilty about it. She helps out people down on their luck out of the goodness of her heart even though her family disapproves. She’s so much more than just a cute sweet girl that can be dismissed because she’s “soft” and “boring”. She can be soft AND strong AND interesting.
As for Anatole, everyone treats him like he’s either a haha silly stupid guy who just makes mistakes and doesn’t think and infantilizes him to excuse his actions like he’s not a grown adult man OR treats him like some evil mastermind heartbreaker who just wants to hurt people. He is neither of those things. He’s too stupid to be actively manipulative but he’s also too self absorbed to care if anyone gets hurt while he pursues what he wants. He’s not innocent and naive but he’s not calculated either. His major problem is that he is horribly horribly selfish. He’s the worst and I hate him forever still of course
18. It’s absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on…
My usual answer is Vera Rostova, but it seems there’s been a bit of a revolution around her recently. Not really sure what’s going on in Veraland but I salute you all. So I’m changing my answer to Boris! He is one of the guys ever and we need to talk about him more. He’s ambitious he’s driven he’s a mommy’s boy he wrote his wife emo poetry and doesn’t even like her anyway. He’s friends (or something…) with Hélène. The guy ever
Also Petya!!! He’s sooo interesting as a parallel to Nikolai and a tragic cautionary tale about idealizing war. The scene between him and that young French prisoner of war haunts me forever
21. Part of canon you think is overhyped:
I want to say the philosophy rants but NO ONE is hyping that up lmao. I’m going to go with the bear cop river thing. Don’t get me wrong I love that bit but people talk about it like its a whole volume of misadventures when it’s literally mentioned once in passing
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dolokhoded · 2 years
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say what you want about great comet and its flaws as an adaptation but i will NOT be taking criticism on the FACT that it has the best casting.
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lizzypuppet1711 · 22 days
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things about toronto’s production of the great comet at crow’s theatre/musical stage co that i need everyone to know about because i am obsessed with this show.
as of writing i have seen this show five times.
very long under the cut:
full cast listed here. at time of writing, donna garner replaces louise pitre as marya, tyler pearse replaces lawrence libor as dolokhov, and ben carlson replaces marcus nance as andrey/bolkonsky. currently i’ve seen the og cast four times and the replacements once.
the stage is set up with seats on three out of four sides, with front rows at tables, back of house left and right sides at barstools, and a small balcony with some seats on house right. there are balconies on either side, with a revolving platform in the middle of the stage (revolving by being pushed by cast members or stagehands). seats around 200 people or so.
the actors are EVERYWHERE. it is so incredibly immersive
the music is very punchy
during prologue, everyone is taking shots as they’re introduced, except dolokhov, who drinks straight from the bottle and sprays it into the air
i’m a dolokhov girlie through and through and once he nodded hello at me during the prologue and i legit swooned
mary is walking around holding a program showing off the family tree, actors will point to them on tables etc
once anatole pointed at his face on it, pointed to himself, all in a very flirty manner
he winked at me during prologue once and i’m still thinking about it
evan buliung is acting his ass off as pierre
he is definitely is more gruff and acting focused (think dave malloy over josh groban)
at “hours at my screen”, pierre takes an audience member’s phone (from one of the tables… or once out of someone’s hands LMAO) and mimes tapping, scrolling through it etc
two stagehands move things on and offstage (such as the sofa, church props etc) and they are also in little costumes. it’s very adorable
dolokhov’s little soldier walk thing??? during moscow????? i’m sure there’s a reason for it bc both of them do it but i have no clue why it’s there???? love it tho
heeyun park as mary is also acting her damn heart out
private and intimate life has a faster tempo and is SUCH a banger as a result
an audience member gets briefly pulled up on the platform to be the cheap french thing, he typically kisses up their arm, hugs them, and sometimes sits on their lap a bit
pierre is playing the tambourine in the background during natasha and bolkonskys and it is honestly kind of funny
hailey gillis plays natasha very emotional and headstrong. her no one else has a sense of urgency, desperation, and deep longing
the platform is spinning and people are walking around and she is singing like an angel…
basically i want to be hailey gillis when i grow up
actors are rotating the platform during no one else and it ends with andrey standing behind her and pierre standing in front of her. no one talk to me i’m losing it
as the run has continued, dolokhov’s adlibs during his intro in the opera have increased drastically
lawrence libor as dolokhov had such an air and presence (rizz?) about himself i cannot DESCRIBE. the comphet he gave me… i miss him v much. he was also very much giving toronto mans. and he made SO MUCH eye contact. he loves to look at you. i miss him. i need him. who said that
tumblr theatre girlies you would go insane over lawrence libor. if this show had ANY b roll footage i know i would be seeing edits all over the place
i am president of the lawrence libor fan club and everyone should join me
tyler pearse as dolokhov has heavy frat boy energy. he is also gayer, and somehow, sluttier. gives short king energy despite only being an inch shorter than lawrence (apparently)??? don’t ask bc i don’t know either he just does. anyway thank u tyler pearse for making dolokhov bisexual for real
either way dolokhov is doing SO MUCH in this production. he is wild he is a whirling dervish he is arrogant he is a bastard he is everything to me
“YEAH BABEY LETS GOOOOOOO” -lawrence libor as dolokhov, upon his entrance
in one performance he would go YEAH BABEY three separate times in act 1. yeahh
flirting with a girl in the balcony, dabbing up a guy in the balcony, generally being hilarious
and tyler pearse leaning over the balcony, rose in his mouth, wolf howling… i can’t.
basically i can’t with this production’s dolokhov. i’m obsessed
anatole’s entrance… he’s a whore. all i can say
rita dottor (ensemble) does the high soprano bravooooooo and she always sounds so fantastic. live laugh love rita dottor
george krissa, who plays anatole, is probably the most attractive man in ontario. like if you googled hot guy he would be the first result.
“where did they find this anatole. was he made in a lab or something. he was perfect” — my friend after seeing it
tumblr theatre girlies you would also be obsessed with george krissa. like jeremy jordan andrew rannells level obsessed. please love these toronto actors with me
i’d let him ruin my life ANY DAY. it is a fact that lesbians love george krissa. i hope he knows
the way he plays it… my friend described it like “lucas steele is like an alien david bowie, and george krissa is a bridgerton man. just a very charismatic, but normal, guy”
while i would say that lucas steele’s anatole believes he is truly in love with natasha, i would not say the same for george krissa’s. some of the manipulation happening here during the opera is. quite clear
when he is entering the box natasha struggles to open her fan, fans herself frantically, under the arms etc. then when he enters immediately shifts to fanning in a cool and collected manner. hailey gillis master of comedy
“we are speaking of most ordinary things” is especially like. this is a male manipulator if i’ve ever seen one
natasha lost was added back in!! fantastic obviously
anatole checking his hair in the mirror before waking pierre up. fucker
“look dolokhov’s coming around… and we’re off to the CLEURB”
brendan wall (ensemble) walking around during the club scene with a glowstick necklace on is peak comedy to me
i’ve said it but tyler’s dolokhov is an absolute slut at this scene. and for what AND FOR WHAT!!!!
also fun tidbit but all the glasses (other than shots) and any clear bottles have real liquid in them. i am very concerned something will spill one day
when dolokhov gets right up in the audience’s face during “known only to his intimates” i LOVE it idk
during the duel, marya and rita steal off to house left directly beside the barstools and chatter about how bad of an idea this is, they’re so drunk, etc
special shout out to divine’s “he will kill you STOOPID HUSBAND” so good
dolokhov’s adlibs during the duel… i need him. sorry
dolokhov gets shot in the side rather than his shoulder, and unceremoniously rolls off the platform as it’s moving. looks painful
hélène screams when dolokhov is shot but not pierre. so much to think about here
a life changing dust and ashes from evan. i can’t describe anything more just that he’s incredible. i’ve learned so much about acting just by watching him a few times
natasha’s face at “am i guilty…” breaks my heart she is so tormented
we are canadians we are going to pronounce our french correctly! no more charmantay
hélène has started adding some very fun runs into charming as the run has gone on. divine brown marry me
anatole is shirtless during charming. btw.
again i know he’s gay and i’m gay but.
the entirety of this rendition of the ball has been stuck in my head since december
his “don’t lower your eyes i love you” that whole section is delicious i want to eat his voice
plus “BEWITCHING AND I LOVE YOUUU” UGHHH such an ear worm but only when it’s their voices
the choreo going on here is very nice btw
i love the way he says natalie at this part idk. it’s not overly enunciated and the vowel is just right <— vocal nerd
the kiss feels like it lasts forever
music gets very very loud at the end and you can feel it in your skin
also fun fact the house music before and after the show is orchestral but during intermission it’s electronic. bc. anatole. gah details
when marcus was still in the cast you could really hear his voice during letters and it sounded sooooo.
dolokhov’s stupid little thumbs up to indicate he will be ok. pleaseee. i laughed i did
generally lawrence would grab at the place he was shot at a lot; while pushing the revolve etc. loved that detail. (tyler does too but less so)
sonya and natasha just sounds so great. like they just always sound fantastic i love that song
sonya alone. yes i am weeping. yes camille eanga-selenge is everything i want to be and more. she’s phenomenal
dolokhov sitting in a big fuckin chair at the beginning of preparations just absolutely clearly regretting every decision he’s made to facilitate this. is great.
i know i keep talking abt lawrence libor but the image of him at this part is just. really great. to me. sorry
very campy and exaggerated scowling and grimacing from anatole
dolokhov is so sick of anatole’s shit
“here feel how it beats” is NOT entertained he pushes him back immediately
lawrence dolokhov’s “dawdling” business was him tuning his guitar i miss musician dolokhov sooooo much gah
balaga truly does not sing any of his lines. he is basically yelling the entire time. i don’t know how he does it. it’s chaotic and hilarious and so fun
sonya and mary hand out the egg shakers on house right and left respectfully
near the end of balaga, four audience members are brought up to dance with the cast! (i got to dance with mary once!)
dolokhov writhing on the floor during anatole’s long held note thank u
during the goodbye section, anatole comes around to said audience members and interacts with them; dancing with them, booping them on the nose etc, and at “kiss me one last time”, invites a lucky audience member to kiss his cheek. (this once, was me. yup. still processing it.)
once he accidentally knocked someone’s egg shaker from their hand, dolokhov picked it up, laughed, gave it a shake, and handed it back, and yes i’m still thinking about it
when they sit down, balaga and dolokhov will sit on the house right stairs, though once there was an empty seat nearby so dolokhov wedged his way in between two people, guitar and all. so fucking good
anatole will squeeze himself between two audience members on house left, put an arm around each, and look around at everyone sitting in that area, out into the audience, etc. if one is going to make eye contact with him, it is now
once he threw his head back to look at the people behind him, and someone, at the speed of light, took their phone out and snapped a picture of his upside down head. i scream laughed
lawrence’s BETRAYED BETRAYEDDDD was sooooo good. so so so good
hailey gillis is an absolute powerhouse during in my house
usually when “natasha’s whole body shook” she falls to the ground silently but last time i went she YELLED and i gasped so loud
at “i have refused him” louise would go NO in shock and i FREAK OUT ABOUT IT.
and i loved her “what then? would that be alright???”
“NATASHA CRIED OUT! GO AWAY! GO AWAY YOU ALL HATE AND DESPISE ME” sounds SO FUCKING GOOD!!! I LOVE YOU HAILEY GILLIS
when the call to pierre music starts i always get goosebumps
the fight choreo when pierre grabs anatole by the collar is very good
if we’re comparing to broadway, it feels less like anatole’s life is in danger here but like i’m not upset about it
at this point anatole does not seem sad or upset to me more just. pissed off that it didn’t go his way. like annoyed
as anatole leaves during pierre and anatole the staging has him stepping around/over natasha as she is choking from the arsenic and it is such a. show of his shallowness
his petersburg note is fantastic obviously. live laugh love george krissa
marcus nance (andrey) has such a deep and beautiful legit singing voice. it’s sooo gorgeous. any word that raises against marcus nance will fall.
I MISS HIMMMM ok sorry.
i am more sympathetic to ben carlson’s andrey, however. marcus was Incredibly stoic ben has a bit more emotion to him i think
i could swear sometimes hailey is actually crying during pierre and natasha
her “pytor kirillovich” sounds so tiny and fragile ugh my heart breaks
and his “…pierre” is so assuring AUGHH
it’s such a beautiful scene obviously. i love the two of them so damn much i hope only good things happen to them forever
“it was clear and cold” also. chills EVERY TIME
“having traced its parabola” and “like an arrow piercing the earth” hit me so hard i cannot explain
genuinely evan buliung gives the most effective inspiring fantastic mind blowing performance i maybe have ever seen on stage. he is such an incredible actor and he inspires me beyond belief
the end when the lights get really really bright and then fade out. god. so simple and so fucking beautiful
now this post is very long. thank u for reading it all if you did! (will update after seeing it more times if there’s things to say!!)
if you’re anywhere near toronto i BEG of you to go see it!! it’s closing march 24th :(( so if you get the chance i deeply implore you. beg borrow or steal a ticket just get there! best comet production ever in my biased opinion :)
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